The Skinny Confidential Him & Her Podcast - Nicole Walters On How To Become 10X Better, Set Boundaries, & Take Charge Of Your Life

Episode Date: October 12, 2023

617: Today, we're sitting down for a second time with Nicole Walters, a former top-selling corporate executive who quit her six-figure sales job in front of ten thousand people, took what she knew, and built a million-dollar business in one short year. Today, we talk with Nicole about her new book, 'NOTHING IS MISSING: A Memoir of Living Boldly,' and she gives us all the details on how to build resilience and show up for yourself daily. She goes into detail about her personal stories with divorce, addiction, and how to keep moving forward when times get tough. We also dive into all things entrepreneurship, how to be 10x better at striving for your goals, and how to take charge of your own life. To WATCH this episode click HERE To connect with Nicole Walters click HERE To connect with Lauryn Evarts click HERE To connect with Michael Bosstick click HERE Read More on The Skinny Confidential HERE To subscribe to our YouTube Page click HERE For Detailed Show Notes visit TSCPODCAST.COM To Call the Him & Her Hotline call: 1-833-SKINNYS (754-6697) This episode is brought to you by The Skinny Confidential. This episode is brought to you by Zbiotics ZBiotics Pre-Alcohol Probiotic Drink is the world's first genetically engineered probiotic. Go to ZBiotics.com/SKINNY to get 15% off your first order. This episode is brought to you by Ring Concierge Ring Concierge is the leading luxury jeweler committed to designing for women, by women. Use code SKINNYRC and save 20% on any fine jewelry at ringconcierge.com   This episode is brought to you by Dreamland Baby Use code code SKINNY at checkout for 20% off all Dreamland Baby Co items and free shipping at dreamlandbabyco.com This episode is brought to you by Pillsbury Whip up a delicious, kid-pleasing dinner that's as easy as FIll, Roll, & Bake. Find more weeknight dinner recipes at Pillsbury.com This episode is brought to you by Cymbiotika Cymbiotika is a health supplement company, designing sophisticated organic formulations that are scientifically proven to increase vitality and longevity by filling nutritional gaps that result from our modern day diet. Use code SKINNY at checkout to receive 15% off your purchase at cymbiotika.com This episode is brought to you by ProLon Nourish your body without the hunger by ordering the ProLon Fasting Shake today. Go to ProLonLife.com/SKINNY and use code SKINNY at checkout for 15% off your order. Produced by Dear Media

The following podcast is a Dear Media production. She's a lifestyle blogger extraordinaire. Fantastic. And he's a serial entrepreneur. A very smart cookie. And now Lauren Everts and Michael Bostic are bringing you along for the ride. Get ready for some major realness. Welcome to The Skinny Confidential, him and her.

Aha! Once I had that knowledge, at least then I was making conscious choices. Everything I talk about is about choices. And the fact that one of the biggest lies society will tell you, a narcissist will tell you, that friend who's a hater is going to tell you, the internet will tell you, is that you lack choices. And if you take that empowerment back and you're able to say to yourself, no, in this moment, I know I have choices. Even choosing to not do something is a choice you will always have. You know someone is good on the mic when we have them on the podcast twice.

And Nicole Walters does not disappoint. This is her second time on The Him and Her Show. You are going to get so many tangible takeaways that you can apply to your own life in this episode. You won't even know what to do. We talk about all the things, how to tell when your body is overstressed, the importance behind asking for help, entertaining the idea of divorce, how to rebuild having a narcissistic parent, how to set boundaries, how divorce actually ended up helping her family, where resilience is born, and how to be 10 times better while taking charge of your life. Nicole Walters is a former top-selling corporate executive who quit her six-figure sales job in

front of 10,000 people. Then she took what she knew, and she built a million-dollar business in one short year. She is one of the most entrepreneurial people that I have ever had the pleasure of interviewing. She has so much strength and warmth. She is someone who values family but also has a beautiful balance with her business. And she just launched her new book, Nothing is Missing, A Memoir of Living Boldly. She gives us all the details on how to show up for yourself daily. Nicole Walters also has a podcast, which is a part of the Dear Media Network. On that note, let's welcome Nicole to the Him and Her Show. This is the Skinny Confidential Him and Her. Nicole Walters is in studio. Thank God, because I get to sit back.

I told her, eat some popcorn, relax, and enjoy the show. She is back. Kind of talked with you about this off air. What happened when you walked out of the studio last time leaving this podcast? Because we did a part one. I'm going to try not to tear up now, but I walked out of here, exited the building,

and by the time I made it to 3rd Street, I burst up now. But I walked out of here, exited the building, and by the time I made it to 3rd Street, I burst into tears. But why? Because I sat down and for the first time, I realized that I told the truth and that I need to tell the truth everywhere. And that included in my book. But that was the first time you fully told the story here or just publicly? So I told the story in lots of places before, but one, not on a platform like this. There's something to be said for knowing that, you know, millions are going to hear your story. But we came here and I don't know if you guys remember, like, we didn't really talk about what I used to be talking about. We didn't talk about business.

You know, it wasn't just like strategy and systems and all that. We talked about real things like you always do. I do all that. We talked about real things like you always do. I do remember that. And I remember because we started talking a little bit, but then we just got into who and what and everything that you are. And I remember being like, that was an emotional episode. It burst open. Yeah. And that was why I was like, oh my gosh, I'm writing this book. Because at that point, I mean, we didn't go into it then, but I'd gotten a book deal. I was in talks for that. So I'd started this proposal and it was a business book. You know, I started writing it and I was here in California, but the truth was behind the scenes, I was going through a divorce and I had to figure out how to relocate

my kids. And I was completely on the outs with my ex of 12 years and my body was breaking down and I was sick. I mean, I told Lauren a little earlier that right before I came in to do the podcast, I was doing facial exercises because my face had been paralyzed at that point for about three months. So if people saw me before 11 o'clock, half my smile was actually sagging. So I literally was like nervous coming on because I was like, I don't even know if I'll look right. And so the fact that I made it through, it was kind of that cry of relief, I think, at the end of it, but then also a cry of knowingness because I was like, I can't keep doing this. I have to do it differently. We talked off air again about this, but I would love for you to talk with the audience. Louise Hay, who we both love,

always says that when you are experiencing an ailment, especially like the one that you just talked about, facial paralysis, your system's trying to tell you something. To me, it's telling, it was telling you to slow down. Yes. And have clarity. How do you think that you almost manifested that? Oh, beyond manifested it, I think that a lot of us forget that we'll say that all the time stress kills, right? But before stress kills, it breaks you down. You know, it starts showing itself. So you don't need to wait until you stop moving before you change your life. You know, your body's already telling you when you are getting headaches or trouble sleeping or that you are irritable or that you're breaking out in acne and you never

used to have acne. Like these are all signs that you need to change now. You don't want to wait until you're dead to be like, oh, this could have killed me. My blood pressure was 173 over 153 in stroke range. I was dealing with facial paralysis. I had psoriasis that I'd never had before. I experienced a case of shingles. I mean, all of these things were happening to my body. It's cystic acne.

Things that I'd never dealt with my entire life, including weight gain. I just didn't have a reason for it. My doctor looked at me and said, you're not going to make it to 60. Like the rate that you're going is crazy. I'm not going to give you meds because you're doing this to yourself. You need to change your life. I think this is really important to talk about because last time on the podcast, to me, you seem like you have it all.

That's part of the podcast, to me, you seem like you have it all. That's part of the problem, right? Right. You're so accomplished and you're such a beautiful presence when you walk in the room and you look put together and your clothes and your jewelry and everything is like it's 10 out of 10. And so to actually come back for part two and open up about what was really going on, I think is important for people to hear. Yeah, I think it's important for everyone, right? Like, I think we're all seeing on social more that there's a lot of that talk about like burnout and soft life and authenticity. And I've always been authentic with where I am and what I'm dealing with. But as I was learning it, I wasn't

exactly sharing it. And part of that's boundaries. Part of that's privacy. And part of it is this thing where, you know, I like to share my scars and not my scabs. I want to get all the way through so I can understand it before I start talking about it. Meaning like you don't want to start talking about something until it's done and behind you because you want to be able to fully like know that it's already in the past and done, not while you're in it because it's unpredictable where it's going to go. That's exactly right. Plus I have kids and I also have to understand it, right? Like how many people,

how many times do we see like the young people on social who real time are going on crying? Like, I don't know why this is happening. And it's like, girl, give it like two months. You'll understand. You know what I mean? I also think just like it's kind of spiraling off that when there's an issue that people want influencers or celebrities or whatever,

entrepreneurs to say something about. For me, I'm the same way. I got to I got to step back and I got to have my my thoughts and my bearings and get to the other side before I just quickly come out and react. Absolutely. Well, and that's something that I mean, you know me, I'm team Grace and I can speak all day about like how you're the goodness of the team Bostic, you know, but I can also tell you that it's amazing how quickly

people expect you to share every aspect of your life. So during that time frame, I was putting on social, you know, working through some stuff, trying to figure things out. I wasn't being cryptic. I was actually being very honest about that, but I wasn't going into detail because frankly, I didn't even know what was happening. Can't say you're going through a divorce if you haven't filed your papers yet. It was interesting because people would be in the comments saying things like, you know, you left your man, you know, you lost weight and you left your man. And it was like, if I am working through my marriage, how does this help? If you genuinely care, how does this help? And also what on earth makes you feel entitled to my pain while I'm in pain? You know, if you can tell someone's going through something,

shouldn't your response be empathy? Yeah, I think that there is a weird position people are in, especially people of platforms where they're expected. The expectation is you are obligated to share everything at all times instantly. And there are some things that I want to share, some things I don't want to share, some things that I feel less informed about, that I feel not qualified to share some things I don't want to share some things that I feel less informed about that I feel not qualified to share about like I think my big problem with people of platforms is they feel that pressure and people put that pressure on them but then those same people also feel that they need to comment on everything sometimes people just need to shut up yeah sometimes listening is the answer right yes yeah I mean it's I mean, it's like you're damned if you do, damned if you don't scenario. But if you're doing things because other people expect you to do those things and it's not,

you're not called to it, that's a problem. And it's not your own thought process. And also, I think that sometimes people really take for granted the fact that being quiet with your platform is also respecting the fact that you have a platform. If you have a huge audience, it is wildly irresponsible for you to be so quick on the uptake with sharing what you're going through, sharing what your opinion is, sharing what you think. You must take a minute to say, hey, look, I can't just say like, oh, this thing has happened. Let me hop on a megaphone and speak to 156 million people

about whatever it is that I'm thinking. Please be responsible. You actually look unhinged. You look unhinged. 75% of the fucking time when you go on social media and you blare your every thought. I mean, give it a fucking beat, man. Absolutely. I don't want to tell people every single thing that's in my head the second that I feel it. Let me wrap my head

around it. And go through the feelings too. Like if my marriage had gotten better and I'd taken people on the roller coaster, because let's just be clear, I'd been married for 12 years. I have three babies that we'd adopted together. I was really planning on staying. I like being a wife. I enjoy marriage. And it was the type of thing where there were a couple moments during that time frame while we were separated. Now, I mean, little do people know we're going on three plus years, you know, of me being out of this process. And it's crazy because people are just finding out, you know, and they're saying to me like, wow, Nicole, we didn't even know or why didn't you say anything? And it's like, because what would it have looked like if every

time I went on, I was like, we're together. We're not together. We're working on it. We're not together. That's unreal. Who does that? You know, I've never asked anyone this ever. And I think that this will be interesting coming from you. What is the process of even starting to think about divorce to when you're actually divorced? Like, forget about when you decide to get divorced. You know, you know, sort of what happens. What does it look like when you even start to entertain that idea? I think that is such a good question. And it's also something that I thought was and this is the sort of the madness of kind of like sickness or, you know, anything is you think you're the only one going through it. But I learned it's actually really similar for most people. So when you first start thinking about it, you're still well within the

marriage. Most people can say like, oh, no, I was thinking about divorce two, three years before I even left, before I even took any motions towards it. So it's you start thinking about it. Then you usually Google, right? You start looking around and saying like, OK, what does it look like? And you scare yourself. Then you will start looking at other people who've gotten divorced and start comparing yourself like, well, that person got divorced and they survived. Well, that person got divorced and they got remarried. And you start really trying to get a glimpse of what the vision would look like on the other side.

And I know this for a fact because I have women in my DMs every day who are like, I want to pull the trigger or I have pulled the trigger or it's good to see that you're engaged now because now I know it can happen for me. And then after that, usually at some point in time, you leave. You leave or your partner leaves, one or the other. I left my home, my life, my multi-million dollar everything with three suitcases. I left. I packed up my bags and I left and I went, I came to LA. With the girls or without the girls? Without the girls. So I have a full-time nanny who was there seven to seven. So I packed up my bags.

Did you have to contextualize it to the girls? Yes and no. I thought I was traveling. You know what I mean? Because I came to LA every two weeks anyways for business. So I was like, okay, well, I'm going to come to LA and I'm going to see my therapist because my therapist is here and I'm just going to check into the hotel. Well, when I got to the hotel, I slept for so long, they did a wellness check and they knocked on the door to make sure I was okay

because I hadn't ordered any food and no one had seen me. And I could barely talk when they did the wellness check because I hadn't had water in so long. And you were just out because you were so exhausted? I was out. I was physically exhausted and sick. How many hours is this? I would say it was probably, I want to say 30 hours. Holy shit. Yeah, like I just, I completely, but also time zones, we'll give time zones credits, right? You know, because of traveling, but either way, I slept straight, like did not get up, did not move, dead to the world. After I got up, I remember just being in a stupor and feeling like I could only mentally take one thing in front of me. So it was like, okay, drink water. Okay, eat some food,

lay back down, just send a text to the girls. And then finally, I actually just told my sister, I said, can you please check in on the kids? Because I don't know if I'll be able to. You know, I mean, it was just really step by step. And I think that's very similar for a lot of women. And it's in that sort of critical couple of weeks where I think a lot of women go back because that reality sets in where it's like, I am at my weakest and can I function? Can I rebuild? Do I have anything left? And whether you go back or not, you know, I'm a proponent of marriage. I want people to stay together. I want it to work. But I also believe people should always go after the best for themselves. And that includes, you know, my ex, you know, everyone should have their best, you know, and I was not his best. And so it's, well, I mean, but true, like, you know, I don't, not the best for him. What he needs in a partner is not what I was going to be able to do. So all that being said,

you know, I think everyone kind of goes through that phase. And then you go through this phase where you start healing a little bit because you have one less thing. And I kind of compare it to when you're looking at a laptop and you close out some tabs, you know, and everything gets a little bigger. So you're able to kind of read a little bit more. You know, it's not that I can see the whole page. It's not that I'm able to even consume the information without clicking on the tab. But suddenly I feel like I can see a little clearer. And then you start wanting to be able to see one thing at a time and you start wanting so much more. And when you start feeling little glimpses

of hope, that hope fuels you to file. And then when the time comes, you file, you know, and then you move on. And about how long does it take you to kind of come out of it and just feel like you're in a good place? And I'm sure it's different for everybody. It is different for everyone. I would say, and I'm going to be completely transparent, for me, it was about nine months. And a lot of that was because I was dealing with medical things as well. But I feel like nine months for me was quicker than a lot of women because some women are still going through it post-divorce. You know, their healing is delayed.

But I had older children. I also had money, you know, and I always talk about the privilege of being wealthy, you know, like I worked really hard to have that privilege, you know, but I was able to use my money to be able to see doctors when I needed to see doctors, get all sorts of physical therapists if I needed those. And that helped. I'm sure that also becomes an issue in the divorce. Oh, it does. No, I mean, without going into too many details about the financials, but absolutely, that's not something that is loved when you're able to spend money the way that's necessary to take care of yourself. But I had to do it because I'm the earner. So I

had to make sure I was alive. So you said you were simultaneously dealing with your health issues. Oh, yes. While doing while getting divorced. How are you showing up for your children and for your business while all this is going on? I'm trying to get to you. It's crazy because I recount a lot of what got me here in my book, but the real time, you know, of everything, I'm still in it. A lot of that involved, one, I was flying home every two weeks. I knew I wasn't going to move back home, but I was going back and forth plus whatever occasion there was. Well, that takes a toll too. Oh, that's a huge toll. I mean, like just flying back and forth, you know, so I was bi-coastal, you know, by every definition.

Aside from that, I was too scared to even buy an air fryer here. So I was living in like a pseudo life. Buying an air fryer would mean that my marriage was really over because I already had an air fryer. So if I bought one, then that would mean that I don't need my old one, which means I'm not going home, you know. And so I was living in like Airbnb, you know, style because I was like, I don't need anything. I don't need furnitures.

I don't need I just need to be able to move my suitcases because I'm going to go home. So I live like that for a year. So, I mean, if you think about that for your health, you know, it's like I just wasn't rooted anywhere. And so I was trying to make my health a priority, but getting rooted was difficult. And I mean, my business took a hit in terms of my ability to grow. Fortunately, I'd done everything on a base level so it was stable, so I could fund my life. You could take the hit and kind of let it weather a little bit.

But I couldn't grow. You know what I mean? There were opportunities that I turned down because I physically could not show up. But I think that's okay because sometimes I feel like people, I mean, definitely entrepreneurs, they feel like if you're not growing, you don't realize you still have a phenomenal thing and it's okay to slow down here and there, especially if you work for yourself. Oh, for sure. Well, and that was the reminder too, right? Girl, you built it well because look at you stepping back and the whole machine is running. When should you have done that five years before? It seems like a common theme with you. And I mean, this is a compliment. It's going to sound not a compliment at first,

but I know you, it's fine. Suppression, suppression, suppress it, suppress it, move on, drive forward, drive forward, drive forward. And I think it's gotten you to where you are to suppress and move forward. But then it seemed like it got to a point where it stopped getting you to the next level because you had to stop suppressing to get there. Is that a theme going way back to your childhood that you've always been like that? Like just suppress it and move forward? Yeah, it's interesting. And I hope that anyone who's listening that kind of feels that they're either in this place now or they're considering it later can see if there's patterns. So I grew up in a home. My dad was a narcissist and his feelings, if anyone knows anything about narcissists,

narcissists are the only people in the room who are allowed to like live, breathe, think, rule, whatever. We just did a full episode with Kathy, who you saw out there. Yes, I love Kathy. And she was saying basically with narcissists, there's basically nothing you can do. Yeah, there's nothing you can do. She said in all her years as a therapist, she did not help any narcissist or could not. You can't. I mean, you just can't. And so my dad was a narcissist. And what that meant was, you know, everyone else was kind of for his purpose, you know, including me growing up. So, you know, it was you're going to play these sports. You're going to get these grades. You're going to look this way. You're going to dress this way. And anything short of that is failure. And

I talk about that in the book. And so, you know, one, that means that if you are feeling a feeling, you better suppress it because that feeling will never supersede whoever is the main person in the house. And aside from that, if anything goes wrong, it was your fault and you need to fix it. You know, which when you're young, that's, you can only imagine how confusing that is for a young person. And I talk about that through, you know, several stories in my book, one of which, you know, was where I came home and I was, I think, eight or nine. And I came back from, I needed to wash my gym uniform. I went to a private school and I was washing things for the first time. We didn't have money. So I was washing it in a bucket in a tub in our one bedroom apartment.

And I added bleach to it and it was a hunter green. And I didn't realize that. I thought bleach made things clean, you know, so I didn't understand that it would actually ruin the article of clothing. I was a Lashkey kid, so I was home by myself. And my dad saw that I bleached it and his response was to grab the wet article of clothing and beat me with it because I must have known what I was going to do. And now he would have to pay eleven dollars to replace the uniform. And so, you know, growing up in that home where, you know, you would have this traumatic, terrifying response, you know, when I have this traumatic, terrifying response, you know, when I legitimately did not know what I was doing, you know, lent itself to me sort of picking

partnerships. And I say partnerships, not just marriages, but business partnerships, workplace partnerships. You know, I was in the corporate world in a similar relationship where do whatever, stay up at whatever hours, you know, take your laptop with you on vacation. And I was like, of course, of course, of course, because I thought that was appropriate, you know. And the minute I stepped away from my marriage to take a business break and see my therapist, it was just enough time for me to realize, oh, no, like I can't keep living like this because if I do, I'm going to die. Like if I stayed in my marriage, I would not be alive. It almost sounds like, too, you kind of couldn't set boundaries with your dad because it's your dad and you're so little. And it sounds like when you when you decided to get a divorce,

you realized you could set the boundaries to protect yourself. What were some of those boundaries that you found through getting divorced? Well, I can tell you that setting boundaries was the issue the entire time. Dr. Nedra Tawwab is one of my favorite people to follow. She's actually- She's been on here once or twice? Yeah, twice. She's incredible.

She actually read and supported the book and did like a blurb for me and everything because she understands the power of boundaries better than most people, you know? And I always take full responsibility. My partner, I don't have anything terrible to say about my ex publicly just because like he is who he is. And he was always very clear about that.

You know, it was just that I thought that if I could, even if happiness was a moving target, if I could bring it closer, if I could get us there, it would be better. You know, so I didn't set boundaries in my marriage and I should have. And he didn't set boundaries in the marriage and he should have, you know, and it was something that I really wonder at times, not too heavily, what it would have looked like if the person that's here today had been in that marriage and if it would have made a difference. But I do know that growing up with what I grew up with, I think my choices in partnerships, relationships, jobs were already kind of faulty. You know, I just didn't have a good picker. while all of this is

going on is this also simultaneously happening with your kids yes so this is all at the same time well give context for people that have not heard the first yeah no no no no no michael hasn't heard what she's about to say this is different all the things that are going on you mean with my health with your with your kids health oh yeah everything like everything that you've been going through with your kids is that also happening at the same time yeah so so yes context wise i guess because we didn't even talk about this last time so how i get timelines when was the last when were you here oh my gosh it was probably like june of 2021 okay so yeah so it's been years. So when I was here last, we talked about how, yeah, two years, we talked about how my daughter had just gotten out of chemo, my 17 year old, she's fine

now, no recurrence. It's been years now she's in the clear, thank God. But my older daughter actually left our home at 18. And I tell the story of what happened in the book, that moment and that decision and all of that, and decided to sort of take on the world. She was going through a lot. I knew where that was going to go and I had my own thoughts around it. I pursued her daily, you know, to make sure that she always knew she could always come home. And I tell her that to this day, you know, no matter what, I'm never leaving. That was one of the first things I said to my kids when I met them and I've yet to do it. I'm never leaving them. I found out, you know, when I was here, I left in June, you know, we separated in June. By November, my daughter called me and told me she had a bad addiction problem, my eldest one. And so

at this point, I had a 17-year-old in recovery from chemo. You know, I had a 11-year-old child, you know, who was healthy, well-adjusted, living her best life, but entering the preteens, you know, and so she needs her mama, you know. And then I had a 23 year old who's calling me saying, mom, you know, I use too much. And like, like my mom did, you know? And so I'm like, well, I'm in California. So let's check into someplace in Malibu. And you know, while I'm here trying to heal, we're going to do it together. So you just need to come up and be underneath mom. So I'm going through this divorce and helping my older daughter go through recovery. It's a testament that she felt confident enough to call you and comfortable enough. I mean, every day that she left our house, I sent an email or I called her telling her, I love you and you can always come home.

Well, because a lot of kids won't call their parents. Yeah. And she doesn't need to. You know what I mean? Like, and I think that is something that, you know, for a lot of moms, they may feel like, oh my gosh, you know, my kid's out in the wild. What do I do? Well, for me, like I'm calling you every day. You're going to have 500 voicemails from me every single day saying you can't ever, like you can always come home and home isn't a place. It's me, you know? So wherever I am, there's space for you. She came home, you know, she called me and I, and I put her on a plane, you know, brought her to me, took her to detox, you know, checked her in to treatment. She was there for 90 days, then put her in a sober living. And she did that. And she had a relapse, you know,

when she got out after a year of sobriety. And now she's 154 days sober again. So, yeah, we're very, I'm super, super proud of her. But, you know, I mean, it's just, it's momming. I have all three of my babies and I'm happy. How did you also show up for your other daughter who was going through chemo? I don't understand how you, I mean, you really like do it all. Like I don't, that is like the business that you built with having three children and having a daughter that's going through chemo is, I mean, I'm not surprised that you like fell apart. Yeah, I'm not surprised. Well, that's part of it. I didn't process it. You know what I mean?

Like you go into autopilot mode, you know, it's and you know how it is. Like right now, if either if either of your babies needed anything, this episode would be done. You know what I mean? Like it's it's easy to prioritize in your brain when your kids come first. But it's harder if you have a lot more things to juggle. And I'll be completely transparent here. And I've never said this anywhere. I don't even think I say this in the book, but once I got divorced and I didn't have to worry about my partner anymore, who I was, you know, very worried about all the time, you know, and it was a priority. His wellbeing was

always a priority, if not the priority in the house, it just became a lot easier for me to be in other places and including being with my children. I talk about this all the time. I ask this question all the time to people that have this quality, which you have it. Just resilience. Where do you think that comes from? Because it's something that we think about a lot now with our children, right? There's a high likelihood that our children could potentially grow up easier than we grew up if we don't create the right boundaries right right or they might have at times maybe greater opportunity who knows but the point is i'm thinking like lauren talks about this all the time resourcefulness resilience how

do you like where do you think that comes from so i think that's a great question i and i actually talk about this in my book i mean one of the sentences i write is that my father loved me but he also hated me you know know, and it was a heavy thing to carry. My dad also, you know, and I mentioned he's passed at this point. He had Parkinson's, you know, so I also became his caregiver, you know, and provider also at age 18 because it was early onset. So where does that resilience come from? A byproduct. One of the best things his narcissism ever gave me is resourcefulness because a narcissist only cares about themselves So someone's got to care for you, you know

And what's great is that same mentality around resourcefulness when coupled with love Means that you have a kid who knows that they have that secure attachment where they're able to say look I can try this myself and I can keep going even if it gets hard But what's great is no matter what there's someone else who's always going to help me carry it. And that's my mom or my dad or whatever else. So I always tell my kids, you know, who, you know, much like yours are in a position where they can grow up and have it a little easier, you know, and because I worked hard for that point, like that is the point, right? You know, is I don't want my kids to have it as hard as I had it or as hard as life has already dealt them the cards. But my daughter has been doing her own laundry since she was six. She does her own dishes. She is shocked now at age 11 that people

don't know how to pack and plan and make agendas and prepare themselves. Oh, that's mean. And yeah, I mean, a hundred percent. She could talk to me. Yes. I mean, literally. I don't know how to pack and plan and make an agenda. You do though. I haven't booked a plane flight since I got together with Michael at 21. I would have to Google, ow. Here's how I feel about Lauren. I feel she acts like she can't do anything. She's super capable. Michael's father. Tell them what your father

says about me. I will tell the story first. If I leave the house, I feel like she's super woman in there. She's probably packing and planning and doing all this stuff. It's just when I'm there she acts like she can't do anything. Tell them what your dad says. I don't know what he says. He says I'm either the smartest, most intelligent person,

genius he's ever met, or the stupid, most stupid, dumb, idiotic person. He can't decide. Well, because you can't, because she does these things sometimes

where like, clearly, she's capable. Sure. Right? Like at this point, I tell Lauren, you're not fooling anybody

people know you're capable i mean like you're sitting here you know your products are like you've written multiple books like you guys are right right so you're not fooling anybody but then with me sometimes i don't want to there's also that you know but like there's a follow-up question though for you when it comes to this like of course your children know you're there but at what point do you let them kind of fall on their face? Like when do you need to let that happen? So I also struggled with that because again, boundaries, right? You know, and fear because I ran a home where I was the person who was carrying so much in terms of the responsibility. It was something where when I left, I was like, oh God, like this is all going to fall apart. You know, the adults are not in the house anymore. And

my therapist told me this, she said, and because I lost it when my daughter left, when my daughter was 18, I remember calling my therapist from, I don't even know if this is in the book, calling from my bathroom the day she left just, and the only thing I was screaming into the phone to my therapist was, she's not ready. Oh, I'm trying to get, she's not ready yet. I just got her. She doesn't know enough. She's not going to be okay. And because I was just scared for her you know I'd only had her from 14 to 18 and I could I knew the trauma in her because you know you felt she wasn't she just she even though she was 18 it wasn't just 18 is just a number you know what I mean like I know full-grown adults who can't take care of themselves better than my 11 year old and

when you say left do you mean she's going away just into the world she went into college she ended up failing out because she just wasn't ready you know there were things that I knew and I felt but maturity is different with each of your each of your children's different you know like you can have a toddler one's gonna walk in one month and one's gonna walk another month you know one's ready for solids here one's ready for solids a different time like it's I saw her and I heard what she wanted which was I want to take on the world I want to go to college I want to and I heard what she wanted, which was, I want to take on the world. I want to go to college. I want to do this. But what has college been drinking? Independence around schedules. You need to have the confidence that you can go to classes every day. You need to know what you're doing. How dare kids take on hundreds of thousand dollars in debt and have no idea what they want

to even do. And they don't even teach entrepreneurship. You know what I mean? I've been saying for years, it's insane. It's insane. It's immoral. And they have less time to pay it back than you do a mortgage on a house you have 20 years on a student loan and 30 on a house and you can't be out of it and you can't be out of it you know i just finished paying off my student loan like four years ago and you're using your degree every day right oh do you get what i'm saying like it's just like come on you know so it's like but you know she felt like this is the right thing to do. And I got into college and, you know, I hustled for four years after coming out of the hood, like this is what I should do, you know? And I saw her shooting and I kept telling her,

you don't have to do anything. But she was like, no, no, no, this is right. And she went there and started drinking and, you know, got scared and wasn't sure what to do and didn't know what to do with freedom. She fell apart, you know? And so when she came home, I said, look, what do you want to do? You know, do you want to stay home? Because if you stay home, there are going to be rules. There's responsibilities, things like that. And she was like, no, I just want to be free. I just want to go live with my friends and just kind of do what I want. And I was like, oh, honey, like that's not how the world works, you know? And she was like, well, I've been on my own before with my other mom. Why can't I be on my own now and I said because it's different because I'm

going to be with you and I'm on your back because I love you like I'm not going anywhere and she was like all right watch me you know and I talk about that moment in the book but when she left you know and I had to let her go because I couldn't keep her. She's 18 and she's capable. My therapist looked me in the face and said, every single thing you have ever put in that girl is still there. And when the time comes, she will use it. And she was away from us and out of our home

for almost four years before she called and needed to go into rehab. And I mean, I saw her in between that time and had phone calls. And I had many a 911 where people don't even know I'd be on set for a show. Actually, I came out of dropping off our daughter from chemo and hopped on a plane and 24 hours flew up to her to check her into a hospital

with a suicide attempt. You know, so I mean, it was like- While you're working and doing the show. While I'm working and doing the show and managing my marriage and everything. You know, I mean, like it was truly the most chaotic, probably like past three, four years before I ended up divorcing. And she was using everything. I mean, she was like, oh, mom, I remembered your broccoli recipe.

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hear from you that actually like almost has anger or resentment towards you, but it's misdirected and it should be towards her mom. Oh, I issues are mommy issues right right like they are you know telling me all this and i feel like she's angry at you but it's misdirected anger she i mean and our relationship now is amazing right because she knows because i have never left you know i have earned my stripes you know around momming whereas my little one she doesn't know anyone else besides me as mom you know she's 11 now i've had her since she had just turned three my middle one who was 11, I got her just early enough. Which by the way,

people who aren't familiar with the story, you need to go back and listen to the first episode we did with Nicole to get context of what you're meaning. Right. I adopted my three kids from the side of a Baltimore city street. And you know, after 30 days, her mom went to jail.

I took them in and I've had them ever since. I was 28 at the time. That was a very condensed version. Very condensed. There's a lot of nuances. The first episode we did with you is phenomenal. So you should still listen to it. Yeah, it's like lots of nuances because there was, you know, addiction, all these things.

But all that being said, yeah, my older one, I mean, she understands herself better now. Also think about all of us at 18. What we thought we knew. The worst part about 18 is you think you know everything and the world is reminding you at every turn that you know nothing. You know, at least at like 30, we recognize that we know nothing and we're willing to go out and get it from somewhere else. You know what I mean? If you're lucky, you realize that at 30. If you're lucky, you realize that at 30. So, you know, she's at the age now where, you know,

she crossed that kind of 21 threshold where you have a lot more humility and life gave her a lot of lumps. And she looked at me and she said, mom, I have to tell you the truth. It was hard for me to believe that you ever loved me when my own mother never loved me. And it broke my heart because when I tell you the way that I love my kids, like, I want to have more kids, you know, like I'm in a new partnership and I want to have more kids and I never take away what it may mean to carry a kid. You know, if that is 100%, then I love my kids 99.99999. You know what I mean? I'm terrified about how much

I'm going to love a child that I carry if it could even be more than the children I have now. And I only wish my eldest daughter could see herself the way that I see her, you know, but that's an ongoing battle. But fortunately, all my babies are here, you know? When you adopted three children children did you use a therapist

to help with the transition of that and did that did a therapist tell you that you that there would be a point that maybe one of them or two of them or all of them i don't know would have that resentment towards their own mother for sure i mean we've been in therapy for about eight, 12 years now, going as frequently as twice a week, you know? So, I mean, I probably, I spend a proper mortgage in therapy, you know, and it's because I'm a believer. I've seen it create change. And also because we have a lot of different complexities, you know, going on in our household. But when it comes to my girls, they each have a different relationship with their mother. You know, my three-year-old barely remembers her. You know, my middle one always felt a detachment from the household

because she was 11 and she was kind of like, I'm the middle child slash why am I even here? Everything's kind of off. I don't really get it. And then my older one has, you know, seen and experienced the most, you know, of addiction and that byproduct. And I also think it's worth saying just as kind of a mini disclaimer, my bio, I call her my baby mama, you know, my bio mom, she's the greatest gift. She has made the hardest choice, you know, choosing to sign over your kids, you know, is a brave venture. I never could have done it. You know, she did something I can honestly say I could never have done. Where is she now? So she's working on her sobriety. You know, I actually haven't shared this anywhere. No one knows this, but my kid's bio dad died just a few months ago.

And so, you know, while dealing with the divorce process, that's something else. We've always known the day would come whenever you're dealing with someone with addiction. You know that that's going to happen. And so, you know, helping my girls through that process, you know, is not easy. You know, now she's on her own. So we're, you know, she's working on her own so we're you know she's working on her sobriety making sure she's stable but she's always been in our life yeah always the hard thing with everything that that you talk about is like there's no manual for what you're doing oh no and it's

like sometimes i feel like this is just chaos you know what i mean like you can't even google it it doesn't you can't even google there's no rules for it like and then throw in you know a tv show on a major cable network and throw in a multi-million dollar self-made business and, you know, throw in skincare. I mean, that alone. Skincare, I mean, that takes 30

minutes a night. Every single day. Michael just learned he needs to brush up his eyebrows. It's a real thing. I mean, your life is nothing short of crazy. I don't have to tell you that. It's crazy. It's chaos. But part of the reason, well, I mean, there's many reasons I want to talk to you.

And obviously you have a show and you're doing it with us and all that. And we have a relationship. But we just saw you in Austin at the event and we were sharing a stage with you. And I have to, like, I told Lauren after, I'm like, holy shit. Everyone said that. You were the main attraction on that stage. Are you kidding me? No, no, for sure.

Every single person that we went to dinner with, we went to dinner with like seven people that were on the team and every single person was moved by you. I got fired up on the stage. Well, you guys are great. I mean. No, but listen. Yeah. Thank you.

You were the whole level. A pro. Thank you. But I think like there's so many people like, one, this story is incredible, but they look to you for entrepreneurial career advice. And I think because again, you have the stripes there as well and you get credit in a lot of areas, but I think in this particular area, there's a lot of young people that want to do what you've done and also maybe come from tough circumstances or little opportunity. And I want you to talk about a

little bit because you touched on it before, but there's this recurring theme. It's like, well, I don't have this opportunity or my upbringing was this. And it's like an excuse to hold people back. Constant excuse. Absolutely. And I want you to talk about that a little bit. That is a real thing. There's a quote that I use in the book that when you hear it, you're going to think, oh, that's offensive.

But if you sit with it for a second, you'll understand what it means. So my father used to drive me around. He was a taxi driver in D.C. And so I spent a lot of time, you know, kind of held captive in the passenger seat of a narcissist car, you know, and, you know, you can only imagine the impact on my mind. But, you know, a broken clock is right twice a day, you know, and he had a couple of gems there that were really effective, one of which was we drive around these buildings and he would say, look, you know, people think America is all about getting the house and the cars and the two point five kids and all that. And he was like, it's not. It's about options and choices and opportunity.

And you need to be chasing those. And those are available to everyone. And he would point at the buildings and he would say, look, America is one of the only places where you can go from cleaning one of those to having your name on the side of one. You know, and that was his perspective. And sure, some people may, you know, have a couple more cards in their deck, but I know people who were born with tons of opportunity that have nothing to show for it or have squandered it all. 100%. And so it's one of those things where I have never been afraid to open my mouth to ask for the opportunity. I go out and get what I want. And that is something that I've also empowered my daughters to do. And frankly, they've been my fuel too. I can't sit here and write the wrong book. I can't sit here and talk about a business book when I have a story to tell, which is this is the book you need to make the business book work. If you understand, look,

I'm going to tell you every single thing I've gone through and everything I've learned from it and understand that I did all the things you've seen on the outside while dealing with this. I don't want to hear anything about how you can't. I think this is such an important book to write because it does set the foundation. And when you were telling me about this book, I'm like, the business book will be there. Will be there. The business book will come. And as to, as a matter. That could write itself too. Right. I will say this. I'm just going to use the term as a matter of fact,

people might push against that. I know many more people that have started out with so much opportunity and have completely squandered and lost it i mean i can name many people so many they they should have been so or could have been or had the opportunity just blew it right because they didn't have to compare to like we you know we do the show we talk to all these people people that have started from very humble circumstances and have made so much so i think absolutely you know it's a i think it's a real disadvantage at times when you start on square 10 because you think you're gonna stay there forever yeah it can't be right and the pressure to the mindset that sometimes offends people to say sure sure because they're like what

are you talking about i would love to there. But I know a lot of people that start at square 10 and go back to square one. People also don't understand a lot of the pressure too. I mean, like as somebody who started from square negative zero, you know, I made it to square 10. Like understand, I know what it's like to sleep on a couch and wake up with roaches crawling on me. I also know what it's like to sleep in a multimillion dollar home where I bought the lots next to me so I wouldn't have neighbors, you know, and fly on jets and things of that sort. You know what I mean? Total power.

Tiny flex. You know what I mean? Like, I know what that's like also. And I can tell you that I recognize having been in both brackets, you know, on both sides of it that I don't know if I had as much clarity as I do now, you know, and that has nothing to do with money you know you also have how do i say this you you also have the understanding of what those places are like so you know one you don't want to go there but you're also not scared to be there i'm not scared and no one should be because you belong you know my dad used to say which is funny how often i quote him considering you know but that is interesting it is interesting right and i quote him a lot because a lot of the things that

he would say the voices that are in my head, I've had to sort of rename and reconfigure because a lot of his messages were right. It was how he said them. That was wrong. So one of the things he would tell me is like, look, you came to America and you already have three strikes against you or you already have two strikes against you. You're a black and a woman and you are already growing up poor. So that means that you have to work and show up and be 10 times better in every single room. I always heard just be 10 times better. You know, like I didn't even.

And it's not that I'm not aware. You never heard that you're black and you're a woman and you don't have opportunity. No, because like the thing about it is that's still true. Make no mistake. I'm not sitting here saying that there isn't, you know, racism and issues. All of that's true. But it doesn't change that I still have to do my very best, like my very best wherever I go. Sometimes I won't be enough. You know, that is the truth.

Sometimes it won't cut it, but I was not going to show up and be shabby. Well, I think what something really important that you just said is I get asked all the time, like in interviews, like, what's it like to be a girl boss? And I'm like, you mean, I not a girl boss. I'm a boss. And ever since I walk into meetings with tons of men, I've never been like, oh, I'm going to put myself below all these men. I walk in as an equal, as a boss,

and sit, if I want, at the fucking head of the table. At the head of the table, that's right. And you do do that in a different way. Sure. You walk into a room and there's no energy given other than the fact that you're here to show up for 100%. Oh, you're so kind. Thank you for that. It's very. But you understand that it's like I've gone to events sometimes where they're like, look, and this is also it's the humility.

Right. So I talk about this in this in the book, too, is it's not that we need to ignore that we've been through stuff. Grant yourself some grace. You know, you don't have to beat yourself up. You don't have to say, oh, I have to go through hard stuff just to grind my way to the top. It's not that, you know, but there is an element of awareness of that humility. I'll go into a room and if they say, hey, Nicole, we don't have room for you to be a keynote speaker. It doesn't matter how many I could be an Oscar winner. You aren't going to be a keynote speaker. You're going to get five minutes where you get to

introduce someone. Well, guess what? I'm going to get booked again and again over those five minutes one of the things i used to say to myself when i was 12 years old is the biggest mistake i'll ever make is putting a mic in my hands because you'll never want to take it out well i didn't want to take it out sitting next to you on stage no that's actually a that's a very good takeaway is like if you have five minutes you better make those the best goddamn best in your life and here's the thing i mean for people that weren't there at this event i mean the way we set this panel up is we all kind of just had limited time but everyone was brilliant on the panel you're right like you you you take that moment of time and you have an impact it's important so when people come to you individuals come to you and they have self-limiting beliefs or these

self-limiting stories about their circumstances, and you're trying to jar them out of that. Again, it's a touchy conversation because people feel personally attached or they feel maybe at this point in your life, you're privileged and have opportunity to. For sure. I get that all the time. How do you get them out of that mindset? Well, one of the things is this book, right? People tell me who have just met me now, they're like, yeah, well, it's easy for you to say because you're thin and pretty. Oh, honey, I used to have 100 pounds on me and cystic acne. So now what? I was a millionaire then, too. So what now? You know, I've had people say, oh,

what's easy for you to say now because you're rich and you drive a Tesla and have a Rolex. Oh, honey, I slept on a couch with roaches and I ate leftover meals. So what now? I've been both, you know what I mean? And I've been wealthy and successful and had the right mindset in in both so what i always tell people is i'm not going to undermine what you've been through it's all valuable it's all true it means that it is going to be harder now what and so what happens is i say tell me every self-limiting belief you've got now what so that is true i'm not going to invalidate it now giving joe dispensa vibes like this is what joe dispensa says well it's just true it's just like it's true all of it's true so you're gonna base your whole future on your past yep i mean or on what you're carrying now lauren says sometimes my delivery is off but

i think you articulated better than me it's like you can have all of these things and they are all true everything you believe is true everything you went through is true what's your point now what because now what like you nobody's coming to help you nobody's coming to save you that is a whole chapter in the book label no one's coming to save you it's true i have a whole chapter label no one's coming to save you there's a what's that book there's a book by benjamin flanagan it's like the path to wealth and it's like it says god helps those who help themselves right is that the right and and it's true yep like nobody's coming like if you're not willing to pull yourself up. You're going to love this. That was the original title of the book was No One's Coming to Save You.

And everyone was like, that seems a little aggressive. Oh, Michael's like masturbating. And it's so funny because No One's Coming to Save You was very much when I left my divorce. That was the mindset I was in, which was, girl, no one's coming to save you so you can save yourself. What does that look like? But then, you know, over time with more grace, I was like, you know what? No one's coming to save me. But the evolved version of that is nothing's missing.

So if nothing's missing with me, no matter what society is saying, then I have everything I need to get where I want to be. But subconsciously, especially in business or as you get further along and when I meet people that are just starting their career, like I am much more inclined and enticed to help people that I see trying their hardest than I am to somebody who hasn't tried and who's just asking for help. Absolutely. When I get a message, hey, and I get these messages too. All the time.

Hey, can you help me? Can you loan me some money? Can you do this? Most of the time, it's an ignore. And it's like, if you're not really, show me what you've done first and then. And then there's many times like, okay, if I see, then maybe I can create some kind of situation where I can be helpful. But people don't understand that that's how business works too, right? It's, if you're an investor, if you're seeking investor, you're going to be your own, the first investors are the three F's, right? Fools, friends, and family, right? So if the first investors are, and that's because these people don't care what you've done, you know, but after that, if you want to go into a seed round, you're going to need to show what you've built, you know, and that's the truth of it. So for me, it's like,

I recognize I'm coming with nothing, but I'm, I've got work ethic, you know, and I know that I'm going to try. And that's actually, you know, the business, the birth of the business, me starting with $24 in my bank account and building a debt-free business is in the book as well, where, you know, some of my first, my very first employees, this woman named Gail, she called me the day that I quit my job because I quit my job live online in front of 10,000 people. And she called me after watching that and she was like, hey, I want to help you. And I was like, and I already knew of her. I knew she was capable. She's like a brilliant marketing brain, brilliant operations person, you know, and I was like, okay, but I can't pay you

because I'm also very transparent. Like you pay people what they're owed and you pay them in full like that is just a moral standing. Right. And she was like, it's OK. I believe in you. I know how you work and I know we'll square up. We have made each other millions, you know, to this day. She is actually a stay at home mom.

And she's also someone who and I talk about this in the book. She's also someone who will never want for anything because she came to me knowing I didn't have, saw my work ethic, knew that I'm also honest and loyal and will show up if her kids needed. And my kids will never eat and her kids not eat, you know, because I honor people who get that. So like, I get what you mean about people sliding into the DMs thinking they're just going to get a handout, you know, but if no one's ever going to help you, what would you do then? If the issue is I have to dismantle the patriarchy so that then I can get ahead, then girl, get about it so that that way you can get ahead. It's not saying I don't want to be charitable or people shouldn't be charitable. I'm just saying that if you're

vetting one against the other, you want to invest where it matters. I'm not going to give my money to a charity that's just going to use it to go to, you know, or an individual that's not willing to help themselves because I'm looking at it as like, we'll be here in three months doing the same thing. For sure. You have to be willing to help yourself. Also just like the belief in yourself. But no, I just wanted to talk through that. The other thing I wanted to ask you is what are the most common things or issues people are coming to you with when it comes to their career or business? Like what are the things that keep popping up on your radar over and over that you're seeing commonality between many people? So they've changed a lot. I would say probably five years ago, I was getting a lot of people

who were like, well, I want to get into being an influencer or I want to get sponsorships and deals. Now I'm getting a lot of people who are like, I want to pivot. I realized that I should have built a product years ago. I realized that I don't built a product years ago I realized that I don't even understand my finances like I made the money but I don't know what to do with it or how to keep it or how to grow it without pouring into ads all the time or what so I get a lot of pivoters or people who are just seeking to have more understanding around what to do like what is a profit and loss statement like they skipped a lot of steps they went for the glitz the glam you know the appearances without thinking like oh no I still have to do real business things. Oh, yeah,

you do, honey. You got to understand like your profit and your loss. You got to understand margins. You can't just make up prices. You know, being a girl boss is not just photos with a laptop, you know, and a beach in the background. It's also understanding what the heck you're doing, why you're doing it in marketing. You know, so I get a lot of that. People who just don't understand the pieces. Like my office is actually not too far away. I opened up an office. I had a headquarters in Atlanta. Closed that down. That's the other part, downsizing. So I get a lot of people who are in this market looking to do it right because people overscaled. So in this economy, did you ever really need 16 employees? Did you ever really need to have 15 warehouses? 15 warehouses or did just really look good with you taking a picture in hot pink heels on a

forecast? You know what I mean? If like, if the first problem solving a company is hire more people, that's not it. That's not actually the soft human capital is actually one of the biggest drivers of companies going under, you know, a lot of people are talking about layoffs and things that are, you know, happening right now. And they're like, this is terrible, whatever. And I'm like, it's not really layoffs. It's that they overhired to begin with. And they also overpaid. They'll hire all these people back, but at the right rate. I made a comment and I know, again,

we're getting into murky waters here. I spoke on this panel in Cannes when we were over there and I made a comment. I also didn't realize I was on a panel with former Twitter employees, but I made a comment about Twitter. And I said, listen, there's maybe a lesson to be learned after that Elon takeover, how many people they let go and that the thing is still running just as efficiently as ever.

And like, it's not to, you know, it's not a people thing. It's like maybe that company just was overstaffed by a couple hundred or thousand people. And like, it can operate the same without those people. Sure. I think the issue with where people will get upset about Twitter is just more how it was done. You know what I mean? I think that's the only issue. I think really tech should be able to operate on its own. It should be something that's built to be streamlined with less employees. But the conversation was around like, what do you think of layoffs and the economy? That's a nature of business. If you don't have a side hustle, I don't know what you're doing.

I have never relied on one check. Call that the African kid in me, you know, but it was always like if I mean, to this day, if I had to, someone asked me if you had to start, you probably get this question. If you had to start tomorrow, what would you do? Oh, well, my business would never go under. I'm a consultant. As long as I can walk down Main Street and their business is open and I have sneakers on my feet, I can go into 10 businesses and I'll convert at least two before the end of the day, if not three. I am all about getting resourceful when it comes to cute ideas for my kids. I made like a pizza with Zaza the other night. I also have like little crafts ready to go. Anything like we did like monster cookies. But one thing I've been doing with her that she absolutely loves are taking Pillsbury Crescent Rolls and making like our own recipe with them. So we take the Pillsbury Crescent Rolls and we'll make like a pepperoni pizza Crescent Roll.

We've also done like a chicken bacon ranch Crescent Roll. Her favorite is ham and cheese. But lately I've also been making like a crepe situation. So I'll do like a little bit of cinnamon, some strawberry jam. You could also add a little bit of syrup. And Zaza loves this. It's so interactive. It's fun. It's also nostalgic for me because Pillsbury is like I had that when I was a little girl. So to bring it through and like let Zaza have fun with it and make something out of it is so fun. She just loves to bake. And this is a great way to do something that's for family time that's also artistic and creative. The other day, she told me that we were making memories, which is so cute.

Weeknight recipes are as easy as fill, roll, bake. You can find Pillsbury in the dairy aisle. Dinner prep in 30 minutes or less. Find more weeknight dinner recipes at Pillsbury.com. Weeknight recipes are as easy as fill, roll, bake. You can find Pillsbury in the dairy aisle. Dinner prep in 30 minutes or less. Find more weeknight dinner recipes at Pillsbury.com. One brand that is in my day-to-day every day is Symbiotica. I cannot shut the fuck up about it, actually. I love all of their products. It's really hard to pick one. If I was going to start with three, I would start with the vitamin C no-brainer. Their glutathione is incredible, especially if you're drinking alcohol. And then I really like this magnesium spray it's like a

lavender spray that you spray onto your body and it sort of like seeps through your skin and relaxes you those are my three ride or die products but they have everything they have a vitamin b12 that I give my kids a squirt in their mouth every day they have have a vitamin D3 with K in it, which is incredible. You got to have K2 in your vitamin D if you're going to have it. And theirs is another one that you can squirt 12 little squirts in your mouth and it's liposomal. So it goes right to your bloodstream. They also have like a plant protein that is absolutely incredible. It's a greens powder that's packed with essential vitamins, minerals, and whole food nutrients. I think it has like 20 grams of protein. It's just a brand that really cares about the formulation. Everything is so sophisticated and vetted. I'm a fan of the brand, the owners,

and the organic formulations. It's a 10 out of 10. I've used my own code so many times I can't even count. You can use code SKINNY at checkout for 15% off your first purchase. This is an addition to custom bundles, so you can get 45% off. Create your custom bundle at symbiotica.com and get 30% off. Brooke Burke, who is so major, came on the podcast and talked about her experience, her positive experience with intermittent fasting. We've also had a lot of people come on and just rave about it. I wanted to try a fast, but I didn't want to be overwhelmed. So I reached out to Prolon and they sent me their fast. I absolutely loved it. I did it before a Cabo trip. It was very streamlined, very easy, and very effective. So when I heard that they launched fasting shakes, I was immediately intrigued

because you can use them while you're intermittent fasting. So you don't have to be like hungry or starving while you're fasting. You can use Prolon's fasting shakes to keep your body full, but in a fasted state without spiking your blood sugar. I personally find this whole subject so intriguing. And I think it's so cool that they've launched a fasting shake that's made with clean quality ingredients. So I checked it out. It's vegan, soy, gluten-free, non-GMO. It contains plant proteins, but also a prebiotic fiber. It also has 21 vitamins and minerals. And I just feel like if you're going to fast, why not have a fasting shake while you're fasting? So nourish your body without the hunger by ordering the Prolon fasting shake today. Right now, our him and her listeners can save 15% off your order when you go to

ProlonLife.com slash skinny. Use code skinny at checkout. That's 15% off Prolon, L-O-N, Life.com slash skinny with code skinny. Get started today at ProlonLife.com slash skinny with code skinny. Get started today at Prolonglife.com slash skinny. How do you structure a company? We had someone on yesterday who was telling us she likes to start at the top. So she'll take her CEO and then she'll build underneath that. Is there a way that you structure sort of like a hiring chart? So like an organizational chart? Yes. Well, I mean, it depends on the company, right? Because there's also different parameters for like non-profit,

things like that, like things need boards or whatever else. But what I always tell people is before you hire a CEO, what does it look like to have your executive advisory board? I think a lot of people forget that it's so important to know who's in your fold to help you build out that team. So for me, it's going around and saying, look, if I'm trying to build this thing and hire a team, odds are there's someone who's already done it. How can I find like three to five people that I know that I can go to as I'm doing this hiring process to vet check my decisions?

So it's the team before the team. So it's like, if I were saying, okay, I want to get into, like I've never launched my own products. I've launched other products. If I was going to do my own branding, the idea that I would know Michael and not go to Michael or Wes and say, hey, I'm thinking about doing this. I don't want you to do the work because most advisors don't want to do the work. They're happy to give you a text and say yes or no or look at something for you, but they're not coming to do your business too. You know, like they'd rather cut a check

or support you. So I'd be like, Wes, would you mind if I hit you up with one or two questions as i'm betting when did you and wes meet where was i i love that you're both staring at me i'm like what so we were he was here in the office when you go to the dentist yeah and he was just here um sitting on the thing and i was like ah i was like you're wes aren't you i'm just surprised because wes is a little shy at first so i'm oh he was super nice like he was super chatty. I was like, oh, hello. He was super chatty, but he was super nice. So I asked him, I was like,

do you only, because this is also business brain, are you exclusive to these business, to these products? Or do you do any consulting or outsource? He's like, no, I mostly do just these. And then I was like, okay. I was like, well, what about houses?

Do you do other houses? And he was like, no, I really don't do other houses. And I was like, okay. I was like, well, if I send? Do you do other houses? And he was like, no, I really don't do other houses. And I was like, okay. I was like, well, if I send you some sketches, you know, don't be weird. You should send him some sketches. I think he's being bashful. Yeah, he probably would.

If he was one of the seven dwarves, he'd be bashful. It was so funny. But then I was like, I also like your toys. Bye. No. I was like, what a way to break the ice. He was like, thank you okay bye no but i mean i think all of this is you know it's relevant because what you're what we're mostly talking about here is resourcefulness and not doing things the

hardest way possible and realizing that there's opportunity no matter what circumstances you come from and i think but that's also ego breakdowns, right? Like, you know, it's people's ego. People are like, I have to know all the answers and I can't say I don't know. And I don't want to ask for help. And we all have some level of that, you know, like. When I started this business, there's my former partner, Raina, who's no longer in the business. She was fully in the talent world and she was fully, you know, managing all sorts of talent like we work with here and i was like listen i don't know shit about managing talent i don't want to like know how i didn't know i was like this is gonna be a nightmare so like that's how that relationship started was

like going to her and be like hey i know this podcast side and i know this commerce side but this whole other world and if it wasn't and i say this all the time if it wasn't for her being part of it in the beginning it would have been a nightmare because there was just like there's so much nuance and cadence even the way that yeah no and like the way that i communicate with people like yourself or their manager their agents like that was not my world are you saying you're not nice no i'm not giving that you're saying you're not nice you're like the way that i communicate i've never i would never describe it as nice that's the literal last i just love the aware the self-awareness you're like the way that i communicate i've never i would never describe it as nice i just love the aware the self-awareness you're like look the way that i communicate with people

someone else should do it yes thank god page is in the business but my first instinct when an agent or a manager is giving me a headache again because i don't come from this yeah i don't have time for this yeah right i don't have time for this and reina and page are like wait a minute you're like in a business now where you have to like like do a little of the dance you know it's part of it yeah it's like why i have questions for nicole no we can literally talk all day i'm like i don't have time let's just get to it i have to ask you the juicy questions oh god here we go pounds yes you've lost yes and i've like lost so i always try to tell people it's before after before after right in different seasons. So during the pandemic, I was like, oh, no, fudge is my friend.

Don't bother me. Fudge. Fudge. I love fudge. I love popcorn. What kind of fudge? Like I actually had it. Oh, so I'm like a foodie foodie.

That's the problem is like once you get money, you can get whatever you want. I was having bread shipped from France during the pandemic. Well, you got to send me the link for that. I will send you the link. They ship daily. It's so good. I have my one piece of sourdough in bed every night.

They would send me a whole sourdough loaf overnight. Oh, you gotta send me the link for that. You were getting special French baguettes overnight delivery. I was, absolutely. I was, yes. And butter and jam. One piece. It's very, it's excessive and there was no good reason. Where's the fudge from? I want some fudge. So the fudge is actually from this really

small, I don't know, fudgery. I don't even know what they're called. In not Scottsdale, Red Rock, Arizona. Where's the other place where everyone goes? What's it called? Sonoma. It was there. It's beautiful.

I found them on like Main Street. And I was like, you guys are amazing. This is some of the best fudge I've ever had. I went to boarding school in Hershey, Pennsylvania. It was the best fudge I've had since living in Hershey. And they were like, thanks. Our grandma makes it. Literally brought their grandma out from the back.

I was like, oh my gosh, you're amazing. You got to send me the fudge plates. Oh, I will. And so she started shipping it. And then they were like, hey, we can't keep up with orders. So don't do the thing you do where you tell everyone and then you break the business. You told you shared the fudge. I shared the fudge.

Because it's also pandemic, you know. I'll post the fudge if you tell me where to buy the fudge. Oh, they're amazing. I will send you the fudge details. I want the fudge i shared the fudge because it's also pandemic you know like i'll post the fudge if you tell me they're amazing i will send you the fudge details i want some fudge i want some french roll okay so a hundred pounds of weight loss how do you decide you want to lose weight how do you start what if someone is sitting here listening who wants to lose 150 pounds where where do they even begin it's overwhelming yeah so i love this question in particular because people are always like how did you do it? And it's like, listen, it is literally just going back to what we talked about in the beginning.

It is irresponsible for me to sit here and tell you how you're supposed to lose weight because I have a platform. And if I say, oh, well, the way I did it was I had, you know, three teaspoons of chia seeds, you know, 15 shots of coconut water. And I smeared Vaseline in my forehead every day. Now everyone's doing that. And then they're dying and they're like, why? You know what I mean? So it's like, I'm not going to say that. But what I will tell you is the first thing you need to do if you want to lose weight is see your damn doctor. The idea that people think that they

are an expert at doing the thing that has been their biggest struggle is crazy. If you want to write a book, you get a book coach. If you want to build a book, you get a book coach. If you want to build a business, you get a business consultant. You want to get a divorce, you talk to a lawyer. If you've been struggling your whole life with weight loss and trying to do it yourself your whole life, maybe you're not the best person to guide you in that process. See a doctor and build out your team. So again, caveat, the money privilege is not lost on me. I have the financial ability to do this and explore all my options. But if you look at insurance, I worked for insurance for years, there's a lot of coverage there as well. If you see your doctor, my doctor was like, look, let's just start with

your numbers. My numbers went- Like your blood work. Blood work. I mean, everything, blood work, weight, just my caloric intake every day. I just didn't know. And I think I was telling you about this, like with my girls growing up with African parents, I just didn't know what like vegetables look like. And I know that sounds crazy, but like they made lots of stews and sauces and things like that. Like I wasn't necessarily eating salads every day or the way American style food is. So I wonder if my dad's African. He might be. Does he eat lots of stews? I don't think he's ever seen a vegetable in his life. That guy, he's like meat and potatoes. That'srican he might be does he eat lots of stews i don't think he's ever seen a vegetable in his life that guy he's like meat and potatoes that's it he might be i don't know that's gonna be the headline michael bostick says he's african michael bostick says he's african oh my gosh go

get to tan for five minutes says he's african that's when i come back from vacation nicole walters co-signs well actually he's my cousin nicole walters shipping fudge during the pandemic from france that's it literally mean, that's how it goes, right? But it's like, yeah, no. And so I saw my doctor and my doctor was like, yeah, you know, your blood work came back. You're pre-diabetic. You know, you are, again, not going to live till you're 60. Your blood pressure's through the roof. Like everything is a mess. So I'm telling you that we need to consider serious intervention because this is as serious as like, you know, any other health issue. So it's like, first thing I want you to do is go to a nutritionist and learn food. Just learn food. Like,

you know, this is a artichoke and here's how you cook it, you know? And I was like, I just didn't realize what I didn't know. I didn't understand how calories worked. Like, not even that calorie counting is the only way, but I didn't know, you know? So it's like, I didn't know what a carb was. So you could eat a full meal and have no idea. I had no idea what I was eating. I didn't know, you know? So it's like, I didn't know what a carb was. So you could eat a full meal and have no idea. I had no idea what I was eating. I didn't understand portions. I mean, being African, a portion of rice is half the plate, but that made sense when you are walking where you're going most of the time, when you're eating fresh diets that are completely organic. In Ghana, my parents live in Ghana six months of the year. My mom does. Our food is literally,

we get it every single day. So you go to the market, you get your tomatoes, like people don't even have to refrigerate. Yeah, it's totally clean. Like those tomatoes were picked that morning. They were sold at the market that morning. And then you walked into your house and you made a stew right then. So it's like just the idea, no preservatives, nothing, you know? So it's one of those things where I was like, oh, the way I was growing up and eating in my house, you know, and I was born in D.C., but my mom shopped. She went to the butcher every day to get her food, you know? So the way I was eating there now that I'm on my own is like an American, you know, I can't just go to McDonald's and just get like like a taco is one that's like one

serving, you know, and I'm like, oh, but I ate two. Like I used to go to Wendy's and get like a burger, fries, nuggets and a soda and I would get it from whatever side nuggets were a side item. They weren't like a separate meal. Like I just, it just never occurred to me or like eating chicken. I would get like three pieces of chicken, but like a drumstick is one serving. It's just so like simple things like that. Or like a serving of rice is a half a cup of rice. And you're training your body at that point to like, that's a normal. Yeah. That's just normal. I just didn't know. So like once I actually started putting food on my plate where I could visually see what it's supposed to be, and then I would eat and then I would wait 20 what it's supposed to be. And then I would

eat and then I would wait 20 minutes. I'm like, oh, I'm actually full. I started to understand I didn't need to eat anywhere near as much as I was eating. It's almost like you started running your eating like your business. Yeah, it's also like, for sure. I talked to an expert and then I got the information I needed and then I started beta testing it to see how it worked. And then I tweaked it accordingly to get better results. Did you add any kind of exercise to this equation? Yep. So one of the things I will say is food has always been my focus. And food in not a weird way.

I eat everything. I eat donuts. Like during the pandemic, I literally was like, oh, I'm going to get fat because I'm going to have comfort cheese. I'm not going to sit here and tell myself I can't have that. We are in a pandemic. Yeah, comfort cheese. I like cheese.

I'm going to eat it. Like it's just like that, you know. But it was one of those things where it was like, oh, you know, now that I know, though, it's conscious. So I gained 22 pounds in the pandemic and I took it off right after because I knew what I needed to do. Like, you can't eat three pieces of cheese, you know, in one sitting by three pieces. I mean, wheels, you know, the portion sizes changed. It was a pandemic. You know what I mean? When you were saying peas in the beginning, I was like, can you do slices? Everything was annoying.

I blame the pandemic. It's literally the truth. It's like, literally, I took Brie in a spoon. You know what I mean? I was just kind of like, I don't want to be bothered right now. You know? I'll buy it into Brie. Right, literally.

So it's like, that was what I was doing. But I also knew like, okay, you can still have Brie. You just don't need all of it. You know? So once I had that knowledge, at least then I was making conscious choices. And my book is really all about that. My keynote is all about that. Everything I talk about is about choices. And the fact that one of the biggest lies society will tell you, a narcissist will tell you, that friend who's a hater is going to tell you, the internet will

tell you, is that you lack choices. And if you take that empowerment back and you're able to say to yourself, no, in this moment, I know I have choices. Even choosing to not do something is a choice you will always have. So once I was aware of that, I realized like with my weight, I can choose if I want to eat this donut, I'm going to eat this donut, you know, because I'm choosing that. But I know what the byproduct is. I'll move my body. By the way, that also works. So I think a lot of people, and we touched on this with personal finance, struggle and they make money, but they don't want to do that because it's also a lack of understanding of what to do, where to place, how to save, how to invest.

And so what they do is they just, it's the same with your diet. If you don't know what you're eating and you don't know what you're buying, you don't know what your portions are, you don't know your caloric intake, then you're going to either overeat or undereat. By default. Yes, by default. You just don't even know. And if you have money coming into your business and you don't know what your portions are, you don't know your caloric intake, then you're going to either overeat or undereat. By default. Yes, by default. You just don't even know. And if you have money coming into your business and you don't know where to invest and how to save and all these things, you are going to lose money over time or overspend. Or if you're too scared and you just leave it in your bank account, that's just as bad. I've been in situations where I found out after the fact that I had a million dollars saving an account that I thought was being invested, that cost me a lot of money just by doing nothing with the inflation, you know?

Yeah, it just cost me nothing, you know? So it's just one of those things where I think sometimes we forget how empowered we are with our own choices. And that was a thing with weight loss where I was just like, I just need to get informed because once I know I can kind of, you know, your body's a machine, you can tweak it accordingly. So right now I'm in summer soft season and I love it, you know, where I'm like a little bit softer because I want to have wine night with my friends and I'm taking a little more vacations and I'm recovering from healing, but I'm not getting out of hand either. My clothing still fits comfortably. It's not too tight. I'm not even on a scale. So I don't know if it's six pounds or 16 doesn't matter. I still fit in my clothes and I feel comfortable and I like the way I look. But I also know if I start feeling a little slow, you know, or if I can't keep up with Allie while we're playing, you know, or if I start feeling tired or sluggish that I need to adjust something and it starts with my

food. Well, the things that stress us the most are typically the things we shy away from the most. Like I'm stressed about money. I'm not going to look at it. I'm not going to look at it. I'm not going to look at it. Oh, I'm stressed about my weight. I'm not going to look at the scale. And what happens is like, as soon as you start looking at it and understanding. So for example, like if people come and say, Hey, how do you pack on muscle? Like it's actually not that hard. It's a recipe. It's a formula. It's like you do this type of stuff in the gym. You do these kinds of reps with this kind of protein and you do it consistently over it. You're like, you want to lose weight. Same thing. This kind of way you do these kinds of exercises.'s no trick people always want to hack that's the worst part about being like you know having a social presence

people saw me like lose weight and they literally like oh that's why she left her husband she lost weight she got too good for him all this and i was like no when i lost weight he lost weight you know like it's a formula when something happens good i've realized with social media people want to say oh that's because of this oh my gosh yeah well the thing that I've started saying to people is when they're like you got too good for this because this thing changed your life I start asking them well then what is good enough for me then if you know that I've gotten if I think I'm too good for that marriage that job that business that relationship whatever else then please tell me what is good enough for me.

Please set the parameter of what you think I deserve. Because it really does level set people and make them check sort of what they're, so are you telling me that this is the right partner for me or this is all I can have? Because I'm not going to be limited to what makes you comfortable. Right. You're not. And also they're projecting their own insecurities onto you. 100%.

So even when it comes to my health, like I lost weight because if i didn't i would die and i just adopted three babies it happened after i got my girls i suddenly was like how selfish of me you know and i say this again not to project or make anyone feel bad about the body they're in because i loved my body the entire time part of why i didn't lose weight before was because i thought i still look good it wasn't a cosmetic thing it was like i wanted to be able to say I can stay alive and keep up with these children. But your blood pressure gets that high. It's a scary thing. I just don't want to die because I need to take care of these babies.

But I like the way I look. And I still wore bikinis. I still went out. I didn't care if I was 300 pounds or 200 pounds or 150. It doesn't matter. But I will say that it was the type of thing where I looked at myself and I said, look, I want to make changes so I can just be around and my doctor looked at me and said you're not healthy you you are having people can be a way more weight than i was and not have blood pressure

issues my doctor was like your heart will fail by the way i think everyone should get their levels to see i think everyone looked at regularly regularly you know even if you're happy with your body like you should do it anyways you should know your numbers like we're all like we're too old for that you know what i mean we're seasoned chicken not spring chickens i want you to tell us about your hot new man and your new book you got nothing is missing it's a memoir of living boldly by nicole walters on Amazon. Go buy it, go support. And tell us like about this chapter with this hot new man, you're engaged. Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes. Tell us all the things where you met him.

It's crazy because again, I think I mentioned to you, the first book was a business book. And coming out of this chat, I burst into tears because I knew that I needed to tell something different. I wasn't sure how, but I knew that this book could be the start of a beautiful beginning. And I knew I was gonna fall for divorce and I knew that this book could be the start of a beautiful beginning. And I knew I was going to fall for divorce and I knew that this was all going to be next. So I left this podcast and I called my agent and I said, I'm going to write

a different proposal. And I threw away the other one I'd been working on for two and a half years and I wrote this one. And it ended up becoming one of the top deals, book deals in 2021. Congratulations. Thank you. You know, and I had competing offers for it and it was bought out in a preempt by the largest publisher in the world. And also it's one of the biggest book deals.

Yeah, in 2021. Yeah, like just under a Supreme Court justice. So- Michael, like huge, huge, huge deal. Yeah, really excited. Dinner's on you. Yeah, I know, right? Dinner's on me, ding, ding.

So, but that said, you know, it just was such an affirmation of what I was writing because it's scary. I think anyone, you know, you can go from being, for instance, you know, the two of you went from being sponsored to being sponsors, you know, and that is a different leap, you know,

going from being, oh, people come to me for business to I'm going to tell you everything about how I got here, everything that went wrong and be very transparent in full color about what you've read in black and white. And needless to say, I'm terrified that this book is in the world because I don't know what's going to happen. But what I do know is I'm still better for it. And this book is going to hopefully make people better, too. Anyone who's read it says it's unputdownable and that it has been transformational.

So I'm really grateful because I'm not just sitting here telling you what I went through. I'm also putting in the lessons and you can read it with a highlighter. So you got to sign copies for us before you go. Oh no, so you can put them on eBay and cash out. Are you kidding me?

So this one's going on the shelf. To Alex. Oh yeah, this one is Alex's copy. I want this one. But yes, about Alex. All that said, after I wrote this book, I don't know, it was cathartic, right? I think anyone who writes a book knows how hard it is, you know? And after I wrote this book, I decided to put myself out there, you know, and I went on Bumble online and I started dating again. And it was crazy because

I wasn't, I didn't know what I was looking for, but I'd done so much therapeutic work that I was open. And I met this great guy. He is a producer and a sync licensor out here. He also plays trombone professionally. He's also very cute. He's super, super attractive. Does he play smooth jazz on the trombone?

What are the doors for Bumble? Hold on. I know, right? Sponsor, sponsor. Excuse me. Does he play smooth jazz on the trombone when you wake up i would make him oh my gosh i'd like you to play the trombone so sentences women have never said ever you could do anything clearly i would like you that would be a pivot it would be a pivot it would be a pivot

yeah he actually like play like whatever he's actually really good like he you know does recording sessions like megan trainer and like jill scott like he like goes on tour like he went to berkeley school music so he's like trained trained but so he's not some guy sitting in a van yeah he's not he's not he's not some musician in la you know make sure you got the best has someone playing the piano during christmas in her house so he's also a classic pianist so he's played piano for almost 30 years. So I would love to have that in my house when I woke up. Like, I would love to have someone play.

Like, I mean, we live together and everything. And he says, I haven't played the trombone. Well, he says it. I mean, well, trombone in the morning can get old very quick. He's very good, but he could get old very quick. But, you know, like I'll be making dinner and he'll just play piano. It doesn't get old. It's beautiful. And he'll like write piano and like it doesn't get old it's beautiful

and he'll like write songs or because he is trained classically he'll hear something and he'll say oh I could turn this into something and he'll sit there

and it'll be like Sinatra in five minutes it's really special very romantic stop giving this guy compliments it's making my wife think I'm less than a man you are good with your fingers

apply it to the piano oh too much you always gotta do it you always gotta go but this is I mean I'm telling you this is why she's a winner she is listen You're good with your fingers. Apply it to the piano. Oh. Too much. You always got to do it. You always got to go. But this is, I mean, I'm telling you, this is why she's a winner. She is. Listen, she's something.

No, he's amazing. And I'm very fortunate. And he's great with the babies. The girls absolutely love him. He jumped right in there. They call him like stepdad of the year. You know, Father's Day was so special. We're excited to start our family.

We've been engaged now. We've been together for years. Well, I am personally very happy for you. I hope you don't leave this time crying. No, this time. So happy. Be a good one. It is a good one.

Her book. Nothing is missing on Amazon. I am going to post it. I am just so excited for you. I think that this is the perfect. I see a lot of other books. This is the perfect kickoff. Yes. Do you know what I mean? It is. Yeah. I mean, just like people always a lot of people compared this is the perfect kickoff yes do you know what I mean it is yeah I mean just like people always a lot of people compared it to like Glennon Doyle you know

that like I haven't written the untamed yet but I do want to let you know that this is the first one the story of everything that's happened since in California is quite the doozy as well so working on that one now but you won't understand that one if you don't understand this. Pimp your podcast out. Where can they find you on Instagram? You can find me on the Nicole Walters podcast hosted by Dear Media. All damn right, Nicole. And anywhere you see Nicole Walters on Instagram, not on Twitter and everywhere else. We got to do this more often. I can't believe it's been two years. I feel like we could talk to you like forever.

Oh, literally. I mean, you guys are so generous. The next time you come on, we can't believe it's been two years. I feel like we could talk to you like forever. Oh, literally. I mean, you guys are so generous. The next time you come on, we will just make it about business and finance. We can if you want to. I mean, who knows? By then I'll be like, oh my gosh, let me tell you about the shark attack I was in.

I know. Like literally we don't even know. Or I'll be talking about my baby. Hopefully we talk about my baby and motherhood and all that. So we'll see. We'll see. How you balance it all. I don't think we could contain a conversation. It's just going to go where it's going to go.

It'll go where it goes yeah but it's nice because you guys always get the best out of me I love having you come back anytime Nicole Walters thank you

thank you wait don't go do you want to win a copy of Nicole's book all you have to do is tell us your favorite takeaway of this episode on my latest post

at Lauren Bostic make sure you guys also go back and listen to part one with Nicole her story is wild I think you'll really love it Make sure you guys also go back and listen to part one with Nicole. Her story is wild. I think you'll really love it.