The Skinny Confidential Him & Her Podcast - Nicole Walters On How To Create The Career & Life You Want By Creating Your Own Opportunities & Overcoming Your Hardships

Episode Date: September 9, 2021

#390: On today's episode we are joined by entrepreneur and former corporate exec, Nicole Walters. Nicole Joins the show to discuss how we can create the life and career we desire by creating our own opportunities. We discuss Nicole's journey as a mother and how she used her disadvantages to her advantage. Nicole provides tangible advice for listeners to apply to their own life to find success.  To connect with Nicole Walters click HERE To check out Summer Arrow click HERE To check out Nicole's business course click HERE To connect with Lauryn Evarts click HERE To connect with Michael Bosstick click HERE Read More on The Skinny Confidential HERE For Detailed Show Notes visit TSCPODCAST.COM To Call the Him & Her Hotline call: 1-833-SKINNYS (754-6697) This episode is brought to you by The Skinny Confidential  The Hot Mess Ice Roller is here to help you contour, tighten, and de-puff your facial skin and It's paired alongside the Ice Queen Facial Oil which is packed with anti-oxidants that penetrates quickly to help hydrate, firm, and reduce the appearance of fine lines and wrinkles, leaving skin soft and supple. To check them out visit www.shopskinnyconfidential.com now.  This episode is brought to you by Higher Dose Infrared therapy supports glowing skin, deeper sleep, and a balanced mood. And as your core temperature heats up, your brain releases a DOSE of happy chemicals, leaving you feeling euphoric after your sweat session. The blanket’s deeply penetrating heat instantly boosts blood flow, flooding your body with enviable benefits like radiant and youthful skin, higher energy, a boosted mood, and decreased bloat. Visit www.higherdose.com and use PROMO CODE SKINNY to save $75 Or just go to www.HigherDose.com/skinny to get your $75 off today This episode is brought to you by ARRAE Arrae was created to help women feel the best so they can be their best, through targeted products which are 100% natural, filler-free, organic, and formulated by a Naturopathic Doctor. For 10% off, go to arrae.com and use code ‘tsc’ at checkout. WOO MORE PLAY is the all natural and organic coconut love oil that is changing the way we have sex. With only 4 all natural ingredients WOO is the perfect personal lubricant to spice up your sex life. That's just the pre-party.  All Him & Her Listeners will receive 20% off your entire order plus free shipping when when visiting www.woomoreplay.com & using promo code HIMANDHER at checkout. Produced by Dear Media 

The following podcast is a Dear Media production. She's a lifestyle blogger extraordinaire. Fantastic. And he's a serial entrepreneur. A very smart cookie. And now Lauren Everts and Michael Bostic are bringing you along for the ride. Get ready for some major realness. Welcome to The Skinny Confidential, him and her.

The truth is with entrepreneurship, you don't know what you're doing. No one does when you first come in. Even if you understand the corporate thing and you understand sort of the steps and logistics, every day is going to be different. But that's part of the draw, right? You know, you don't know what you're going to get into. And I love to tell people your name is already being spoken about in rooms you're not even in. So opportunities are happening for me as we speak.

And they just haven't arrived to me yet. And that. So opportunities are happening for me as we speak and they just haven't arrived to me yet. And that's what entrepreneurship has been for me is that, you know, I was out there saying, look, my job right now is make income, right? And make a difference. And that's what I focus on every single day. Welcome back to the Skinny Confidential, him and her show. That clip was from our guest of the show today, a very, very dynamic woman, Nicole Walters. And on this episode, we cover a lot of ground. Nicole has an incredible story. Lauren and I were both blown away. I am hopped up on my new morning smoothie that has so many different things in it. I don't even know where to begin. My eyes, I look like Brandon Stimpy

right now. What does it have in it exactly? Because you broke it down for me for 45 minutes. Coconut oil, chia seeds, flax seeds. It's got a banana. It's got blueberry. It's got spinach. It's got protein. It's got turmeric. Listen, I'm all over the place. You know one of those people that eats a healthy smoothie for like three days in a row and then just thinks they're really healthy and tells you all about it? No, but let me tell you something, Lauren. You got a juve thing light going on your stomach and your phone and it's giving me feedback on the mic. So you got to get rid of both before I can even continue with this

introduction. I have my phone because I'm about to introduce Nicole Walters, and I have my Juve because I'm passively multitasking, Michael. Listen, we love Juve. Here, Juve, here's another free one. We love it. It's the best, but honestly, it's not good for the mic. So please get rid of it right now. Here we go. She's going right up it. Nicole Walters is a mom, an entrepreneur, a wife. She is a badass. She quit her job in front of 10,000 people and went on to fucking crush it. She talks all about in this episode how you can do it too. And her story is so inspiring. She grew up ultra poor. We talk about that. And then she talks about where she met her three daughters. And I think you guys are going to love the story of how she met her daughters. I'm not going to give away the full story,

but she met them on the side of the road. And the story is one of the most compelling emotional stories I have ever heard on The Skinny Confidential. This episode is emotional. It's inspiring. It's aspirational. It's all the things. I promise you guys, you're going to be obsessed with Nicole Walters. On that note, let's welcome Nicole to the Skinny Confidential Him and Her Show. This is the Skinny Confidential Him and Her. You met your kids on the side of a street. Yeah. Yeah. We need the story around that. It's crazy because it's one of those things that I've told so many times

and it's on the TV show that like, I don't even, it doesn't feel weird to me anymore. You know what I mean? But yeah, I was with my husband and we were in Baltimore and we'd been married for about seven years at that point. So it was like date night, you know,

and just kind of, you know, how you do the thing back and forth where you're like, okay, we did dinner here, but let's go somewhere different for dessert. Let's go somewhere different for drinks. So we did that and we were driving to a different spot. And I saw this woman on the corner panhandling, but it was like too late, you know, like where it's like 10 o'clock. And you know this, Lauren, that mom dar where you're like something's off. Like when you're when you know your kid doesn't feel well and you're like no one's taking it seriously, but she seems off. It was that energy where I was like, it's too late. It's too cold. Why are

they still out here? So I told my husband to pull over and, you know, just kind of did the whole, hey, how are you guys doing? You know, and gave them a little bit of money and we started to drive off. But then I told my husband, I was like, I need you to turn back. Like something doesn't feel right. Like I just I just want to kind of see what's going on. So we doubled back. And when we doubled back, I said, Hey, you guys hungry? And they said, yeah. So I was like, well, hop in the car. Cause this is how I am. I guess. I just want to ask a couple of questions. Was there an adult with them or was it three children? So it was actually my kid's bio mom and a three-year-old. She had just turned three, but she was actually really tiny. She looked about one because she was underfed. She was about 20 pounds underweight.

So it was the mother and the daughter. And my littlest one. Okay. Yep. Go ahead. And so we went ahead and it's funny because I rarely get emotional when I tell this story, but I was thinking about the very first time I tell this story on my podcast. It's the first episode. And I played that for my daughter when she was six for the first time before I released it. And she looked at me and walked over and just hugged me. You know? Yeah. And I was just like, I just like had a flashback moment. Makes me emotional. I have a daughter. Yeah. Yeah. Well, because she didn't know the story of how he got her. So it was the first time she ever heard the story. And she just came over and she hugged me and was like, thank you, mom. Like, it was really sweet, but pulled over,

took him to food. And, you know, my kids bio mom told me, hey, I have two more at home. And I said, OK, cool. You know, like, we'll take you back home. We'll take some food for them. No problem. It was just like Subway, you know what I mean? So I went home and then these, you know, I walk up to the door and it's like public housing, that sort of situation. And these two girls come out and the way I always describe them is they look like wilted flowers, you know, like really beautiful, but just kind of they weren't nourished, you know. And they came from the back and one was 11 at the time and the other was 14. And they, you know, did the teenage thing like, thank you, you know. And so at the time I had like a blog and I was like, you know, do you guys like makeup? Do you like hair? Like, how can I,

you know, I'll be back. And they were like, yeah. And I asked their bio mom at the time, I said, what do you guys need? And she said, food, you know, like if you can bring back food. And I was like, oh, I can do that. And then the next day I came back with groceries and then said to my husband, I said, look, like I grew up with nothing. So like I grew up child of immigrants, super poor, like I had to work from nothing. And I said to my husband, I said, look, poor kids are used to people making promises and not following through. They're used to people leaving and not coming back. If we're going to leave, we need to just leave. But if we're going to stay, we can't ever leave. Like I'm not going to be another source of

trauma in these kids' lives. My husband just looked at me and he knows how I am, whether starting a business when you're married to this type, you know what I mean? Like, I'm going to do this thing. You know, it's like, if you say yes, I'm all in. So be ready. Right. I told my husband and we didn't have anything at the time. We were 30K in debt, $24 in the bank. You know, I'm working my nine to five job, but I was like, I'll figure it out. And he was like, OK. And so stayed in their life, bringing groceries and helping with school. But 30 days after we met, their mother told me she was going to jail. Just, you know, addiction, those type of challenges. And so I said, OK, well, how can I help?

You know, what can I do? What's going to happen with the girls? And she said, I don't know, the state might take them. You know, my boyfriend can take them. And I was like, no, you know, how about you? We work something out and I can help support you at least until you get out. And she was slated to do a little over a year at that time. So 30 days after meeting him, I became a mom of three girls ages three, 11 and 14.

How long ago is this? Now it'll be seven years. Okay. so talk us through how it became more permanent. Sure. So, I mean, their mom came out and the girls were like, we're you know, we don't want to go back home because they were being fed. They were being clothed. They had a house. Their grades were getting better and all that. And I said, OK, well, let me talk to your mom, you know, and see because at the time I was mystical, you know, like I was just kind of helping out. I went ahead and talked to their mom and I said, how can I support? You know what I mean? Like, what do you need? You know, can we co-parent? Maybe I'll get them Monday through Friday during school. And then you kind of get them on the weekends and whatever. And their mom was like, sure. But again, addiction is challenging. So she wasn't able to really

commit to all of the things that she said she was going to do. You know, I think it's worth throwing in the caveat, like I respect and love this woman, you know, like it's she's been through a lot, you know, and she still has made the right choices for her children, you know, and I so I respect her completely. But challenges little by little, you know, her visits became less than my my time became more, you know, and mentor became mom, you know. So over the span of about three years, just we did like more and more legal paperwork, you know, kind of first it was like temporary guardianship. Then it was permanent court order guardianship. And eventually it was just full on adoption. And,

you know, my kids have my last name. So, wow, that is a pretty incredible story. And like crazy that you had that intuition to stop and go back. Yeah, it was. I mean, I'm not kidding. It felt like a like a tap on my shoulder, you know, like, hey, something's not OK. Go back. And I can say, though, just always being candid, there was never any intentionality behind it. Like we're going to have our own kids like we had our own plans and everything. It was just more we were just trying to do the next right thing. You know, you notice like, oh, school starting. Oh, you guys don't have clothing like my girls used to cut their pants to make them shorts whenever, you know,

the seasons would change like that was the situation. They would skip school because they had holes in their shoes if it was raining and they didn't want to get to have wet feet all day. So, I mean, it was just doing the next right thing. And, you know, the next right thing came down to standing in the role as their mother, you know, and it's the greatest thing that's ever happened to me. It's a huge responsibility. Do they still see their bio mom and dad or do, is it just separate? We have a relationship with them. We talk to them probably like weekly or so, but we haven't seen their bio parents about three years. And part of that's pandemic issues, right? Obviously. But part of it is, you know, addiction and finances and stability.

And so, yeah, I mean, it's a positive relationship. I have nothing negative to say about their bio parents whatsoever. But, you know, we are their full time primary parents in every way, shape and form. And how has their life changed? How are they flourishing? Tell us about that. So the funniest thing that I always say is it's amazing how quickly kids can adjust to like a nice lifestyle. Kids can adjust really quickly. You know, it's also interesting because we have three kids to see how each of them has adjusted differently. So my youngest really doesn't have any recollection of her previous life. You know, all she knows is that she's lived in nice houses, flown on private jets, you know, had all her needs met.

She doesn't understand why everyone doesn't have a Tesla. You know, like, granted, she's balanced. This is a kid who does her own chores, has done her own laundry since she was six, is very generous and kind. But, you know, she's only known one life, you know, and we've had her longer than we haven't had her. Because she was three. She was three when we got her and now she's 10, you know. So, I mean, like it's. It's the norm. It's the norm for her. We are mom and dad. And her context is, I have two moms, I have two dads, you know, and that's just how that is. And mommy couldn't do

it. So she got someone to help. That's how she sees it. And that's what it is. Eventually we'll have different conversations with her to expand on what she needs to know. My 11 year old, fortunately, you know, we got to her before she was too immersed in that life and before she got too jaded and drifted. So she's transitioned really, really well and she's flourishing, but she does have a different appreciation because she knows what it was like before. She knows what poverty feels, tastes and what it does to you. You know, she knows what that's like. So she's adjusted well and she's thriving.

She's a college student. She's making honor roll, doing Dean's List. And she just opened up her first company where she sells head wraps. Yeah, like hair pieces because I'm going to buy one. Oh, you're so kind. You have to text me. I will put it in because I'm going to buy one. Oh, you're so kind. You have to text me the link. I will put it in the show notes. You're amazing. Yeah. She just crossed the six figure mark. She opened it in March. Wow. Yeah. She's crushing it. Yeah. Doing her

e-commerce. And I know, well, I got to keep her in school now because she's like, why would I do school? Because why? You know, and I'm like, uh, reading. You're like one day you can graduate. She's like, I'm already doing my own thing. But to do what, you know? But she actually started her business because she was diagnosed with stage four cancer last year. Holy shit. And so she's totally fine now. You know, thank God.

I'm so grateful. But we had to do the whole chemo thing, you know, not last year, 2019, the year before that. During that time frame, she came across these headpieces that didn't irritate her head during chemo. And I loved them. I'd been wearing them and she just like stole them from me. I was like, mom, these are like the best head wraps ever. So she was like, I want to make them available for people. So she did the whole inventory vendor. She runs the whole business herself. And you guys know how product businesses are. She does all that while making deals. Zaza better start her entrepreneurial endeavor. She better catch up. She's almost one and a half. Like what? She's taking too long. She's so cute. She could literally sell like anything like,

oh my gosh, slap her face on it. Like I'm buying four. You know what I mean? Just when she looks at me, I'm like literally like on social, like, do you need candy? Like, what would you like? So, so she's thriving. So what was, and we, I want to get to your other daughter too, but what was it like to have a daughter go through something so traumatic to me? I actually don't think there could be anything worse to have to. It's almost like you want to take all the pain on and you can't. I run bloated. You know this.

I run bloated in my face. I run bloated after a meal. I just run bloated. You know this. I run bloated in my face. I run bloated after a meal. I just run bloated. And I know a lot of you guys struggle with bloat too, because inflammation has been a hot topic on the Skinny Confidential. For my face, you obviously know I use an ice roller, lymphatic drainage, facial massage. But for my stomach, I use something else. And that is Array. You have seen this all over my Instagram stories. I cannot shut the fuck up about Array. So Array is this product that's created to help women feel their best.

To give you a little details, Array was created to help women feel their best. So what they do is they use 100% natural, filler-free organic herbs to help fight bloat. There are only five herbs in this and a fruit based digestive enzyme. So that's it. That's all that's in it. The herbs are absolutely incredible. They have lemon balm. They have slippery elm, which gets things moving. It's laxative free, but the slippery elm really gets things going. Not in the way where you have to run to the restroom, just in like the perfect way, if you know what I mean. And then they also have bromelain, which is found in pineapple. So if you run bloated after a meal, I would recommend, and what I do is I take two after a big meal. So the reviews online are insane.

I have talked to all different people from Anna at Pellicure to Melissa who are obsessed with Array. As you can see, the bloat capsules were designed to give people food freedom so you can enjoy the foods that you love without any discomfort, gas, or bloating. Okay, you also should know that Array's products are very chic and they look so cute on your beauty shelf. Of course, Array is giving us a code. You're going to go to Array.com and use code SKINNY at checkout. That's A-R-R-A-E.com. You get 10% off a one-time purchase or 15% off your first month on subscription. Very, very exciting. You guys have asked me for a code on Instagram stories. I didn't have one, but now I do. So you get 10% off a one-time purchase or 15% off a month subscription. I'm telling you, you got to try it, especially if you run bloated. The number one thing moms say, I can honestly say that, and you'll appreciate this too.

And I don't talk about it much. I'm going to talk about it more in my book because it is something that I think I'm still processing because I was so busy being there for her while running the business that I just compartmentalized. But every mom says, you know, one of two things. One, what do we need to do to fix it? That's like our first mom reaction. How do I fix it? I will sell everything, take my blood, take my whatever you need because I need my baby. OK. And then two, like, can I take the pain? Do you know what I mean? Like, I just didn't want her to go through it, you know. And so that was she's been through so much already. She just didn't deserve this, you know, and she's the strongest person I know. So like it was incredible to watch her survive and fight this thing the day that she was diagnosed. She looked me in the face and she said, Mom, I'm not going to die from this. And I said, OK. I said, OK. I was like and I was like, then we're going to do what we

sound like it's a done deal. We're never going to talk about it that way again. You know what I mean? Like it's not even a question. We're not even entertaining this. Let's go. We're doing this fight. And we did. It was the two of us. You know, I would sleep next to her, you know, in the hospital, then hop on a plane, go do a commercial, you know, for a brand in New York, fly back, you know, and sleep right next to her again. And that's what we did for months and months on end. And she did the hard work, you know, but there were some really, really scary moments in there where it was really touch and go. That's got to be like a real like life perspective. Oh my God. You start to conceptualize like what's really, what really matters. There were times where I asked myself, like, you know, like I'm, I'm a faith girl, you know, I believe

in God and I'm, you know, a Christian. And one of the things that was tough for me was I'm a really big believer that God doesn't put good in your life to take it away. Like, I just don't believe that, you know, like I believe in like the amplification of good and abundance and things like that. And the idea that I could get these three blessings out of nowhere and that one would be at risk of losing when I just got her, you know, was like unbelievable to me. But it also allowed me to really remember that like she isn't going to die because he wouldn't have given them to me to take them away. So I had to hold on to that because there were some moments there where I saw her going you know

I saw her leaving and I like was screaming over her body like she can't go and she's still here and she's driving me crazy every day she's 19 now and drives me crazy every day and I'm grateful for it in every moment so she started the business at 11 no she started the business seven months ago oh okay okay What did you say about 11? You said something about 11. We got her at 11. You got her at 11. And so it was all the difference.

And so now she's 19 and she started her business. And she's had it for a year. She's had it for just about a year. Okay. And then you have one more. And I have one more. Okay. And I got her at 14 and she'd seen a lot and she'd been through a lot.

And she was the mother to her sisters, you know, and she's a lot of pressure. She's carrying that. What's great is, you know, we got her through school and everything like that, but she's going through a lot right now. She's fighting to become the woman that she knows she's supposed to be. I think she has a pretty good role model. Oh, my gosh. I wish I hope, you know, I hope. I mean, I don't even want to be a role model. I just want to be your mom, you know i hope i mean i don't even want to be a romano i just want to be your mom you know i mean and that's it i so you're probably the best at 14 you can pretty much like you remember you remember and you've seen too much and you know too much you know versus when you're younger you see things you may have a different context but she knew what was happening she also knew what she deserved and she knew she wasn't getting it and so that sense of self-worth thing is always

going to be a battle for everyone but what i will say is she's 22 now, which is crazy to think I have a 22 year old, but she is out in the world. She has a boyfriend, she has a job, she has an apartment, you know, and she's doing great. I only want her to know that that's enough and that she wakes up enough and she's not measured by what she can and cannot do or what marks she has hit. But she has high expectations for herself. And I like that. And I know she'll do everything. She's got tons of time to do it.

I wonder where she gets the high expectations for herself. I hope she gets them intrinsically. We'll see. You mentioned something earlier that I would love to talk about. You said that your childhood, you grew up very poor, too. What was your childhood like? Because, I mean, what you've done is, is incredible. I would love to know if you were little, you felt entrepreneurial, like tell us about how you grew up. So both of my parents are from Ghana,

West Africa, and you know, they did all the work to get here the right way. Like all the paperwork, they struggled and they came here with hopes of more. But my parents never sold me the concept that the American dream is, you know, the house, the car, the 2.5 kids. It was never that. It was just options. It was just having choices that you don't have when you're other places. And then what do you want to do with them? And I think that's probably the truest thing of everything.

So my dad was a cab driver in D.C. And I remember we would drive around, you know, D.C. And when we would drive, he would point out different buildings. And one thing that would always echo in my head is he would say, you know, I want to let you know that in America you can decide if you want to clean one of those buildings or if you want to have your name on the outside of one. Wow. And I mean, I was like seven when he was telling me these things. And all I knew was that it was, you know, you borrow a gamer phrase like a cheat code. I just need to figure it out. You know, I was capable of doing it.

You know, my dad said so. I'd seen people who look like me doing it. I just need to figure it out. And my one differentiator, no matter what was work ethic, it wasn't how much money I had or where I started. It was how hard am I willing to work? And no one was going to outwork me. So that's what I did.

You know, if you let me in, if you gave me a seat at the table, I was going to close that room out every single time. And I'm really fortunate because I went to corporate America and I did really well. I was four removed from the CEO at 28, you know, when I got my kids, you know, at a huge Fortune 500 company. And then I quit my job. You know, I quit my job live online in front of 10,000 people. What do you mean? I mean, I started like I had a blog,

you know, that was making me money on the side. And I was like, I'm going to give this thing full time effort because I just got these three kids because I got my kids at like 27. So I was like, I need to make money because they're going to be in college soon. And I don't have a college fund and I have debt, you know, and I have three kids now. And I have a three-year-old that I need to stay home with because she doesn't know how to read. And I have to catch her up. So I just knew I needed more money. And I knew that I wasn't going to make it just working my nine to five.

So I was going to go into the blog thing and amplify that. I was just going to try it. Big risk. So I started going online and sharing my story. And what year was this? This was in 2014. Okay. Yeah. Blogging's new. It was new. It was still new. It was early. People were like, what the hell is a blog still? And they definitely, the monetizing was new. Yeah. But that wasn't a struggle for me because that's what I did in corporate. You know, I was in business development. I was in marketing. I was in sales. So that part I knew. So my blog always made money. I was making 35K

on the side. You know, I didn't negotiate all the deals. Oh, absolutely. Contracts, partnerships, NDAs. I knew all of that. I also knew profit margins, overheads, you know, all of that. So I never made blog mistakes that people didn't even understand. And I never did anything for free. Like I'm literally allergic to it. It gives me like hives, like, you know, I'll do free for like church charity and kids, you know what I mean? But when it comes to gives me like hives, like, you know, I'll do free for like church charity and kids. You know what I mean? But when it comes to doing free, I mean, I'm not even kidding. Like, it's like influenza. It's like, bye for Alicia. Like I can't, you know, I cannot do it. And so because of that, being able to have a blog was easy for me because I always got paid.

But then when I went to my fellow blogger friends and they were like, I do content all day and I never make any money and I don't understand. And like, you know, my content's so good and I have more followers than you. And how are you getting more money than me? And I'm like, because I understand contracts, because I understand reporting, because I understand engagement. I'm talking to these businesses like a business. You're not. And they were like, show me the way. So I started picking up consulting clients on the side, which worked out great in between parenting and the nine to five actually started being a kind of like a time suck, you know, at that point. And I made 11 K in my first week. And I started tracking that online instead on my blog, because people were like, what are you doing right now?

Like you have a lot going on between the kids and what's going on. And that's how I started getting more and more clients. And so I literally had to quit my job because my calendar was booked. So I called up my boss and I said to my boss, hey, you know, I'd love to give a two week notice. I recognize I could be burning a bridge, but guess what? I don't plan on coming back across it. I quit. And I appreciate everything that you've done for me here, but just watch your screens, you know, look at the magazine covers as you go down your grocery store. Cause that's the next time you're going to see me. And I was out. And that was where does your confidence come from? You're very confident. And I think that that's something to speak on because nowadays with social media, sometimes

you see people that appear confident, but they're not in person, you radiate a certain confidence. It's a certain sparkle. Charisma is, I guess, the word. And you also like very self-assured, even when you're just telling the story about how you adopted three kids at 27, like you have to have some type of self-assurance to be able to even like. Yeah. Where does that come from? Because maybe someone's listening and they want a little bit more confidence and charisma. I'm really stupid. I have no idea what I'm getting into half the time. And so that ignorance is bliss, right? I think that might be part of it. So like when I'm taking in three kids, all I think is, okay, well, yeah, they just need clothes and they need some food

and whatever. And then they're like, oh, they need more. Got to figure that out. And I think that's part of it, right? So you and I are a little bit similar. We're oblivious. Oblivious. I'm literally like, I'll just do it in bite-sized pieces and I'll clean up the mess. No, Michael's like thinking 400 years down the line. And I'm like, yeah, we'll just figure it out today. The common denominator though, is that whole figured out thing, right? Like I think a lot of people, like they, they overthink, they get scared. And it's like, I think such a, a more useful skill is like, I'm going to figure it out no matter what, right? Like you're going to, you're like, you don't have a choice. Like I tell myself all the time, like whatever's going on,

like I have no choice, but to figure it out because I'm in it. Woo, woo, woo, woo, woo. You got wooed last night. I got wooed. You got wooed last night. Thank God for woo. So Michael does this thing after he works out where he'll work out for three days and then he just attacks me. Well, testosterone's flowing and I get going. One thing though, he's not allowed to touch me and this is 100% true without woo and I'll tell you why. If you get UTIs from sex, I know people that take a shower afterwards, they pee afterwards, they pee before and they still get UTIs. Woo will change your life. That is because the coconut oil is an antibacterial oil. And for me,

what it does is it really helps avoid UTIs. It's also great because it has beeswax, a little grip to really hold on and grip the penis. When you're sliding around, you need something to hold on to. But it's also amazing for the woman too. okay? There's benefits for him and for her. You should also know Wu has a vibrator. If you haven't tried a vibrator during sex, you're missing out. And you know what else is great when we travel? Because we travel a lot. The quickies and the freshies.

You want to get a quick one in and then feel fresh after? Those ones too. Yeah, so the quickies is just the lube in the little packets. And then the freshies are for cleanup afterwards. It's worth noting that obviously we helped start this company and it was designed because we were fulfilling some selfish needs. With coconut oil. But also while fulfilling those selfish needs, we've discovered that it might help some other people's needs. And we also had the founder add vanilla essence for a little smell, nice little smell down there. And then we also had a little stevia for taste, beesw smell down there. And then we also had a little

stevia for taste, beeswax for grip. And then of course the coconut oil because it is antibacterial. So we have a code for you. Of course, use code him and her at checkout. Of course, we have a code for you. Use code him and her at checkout. What do they get, Michael Bostic? 20% off storewide. It's an offer we've run for forever. I would recommend the coconut oil lube and the vibrator. Get it together. And by the way, the packaging comes discreet. So your nosy neighbor, Karen, can fuck off. Enjoy. Code him and her for 20% off. I think that's really what it is. It's not that I am, I'm nervous and insecure and I have all

these things, you know, just like anyone else. It's just that I always try to remind myself, like if a plumber can do it, I can do it. Aren't I as smart as a plumber? Like if a roofer can do it, I can do it. Like these are regular people, right? The only difference is they had access to some sort of time, tools, and resources that I just need to find. If I can find those things, I can do anything. So that's the only barrier between me and success, time, tools, and resources that I just need to find. If I can find those things, I can do anything. So that's the only barrier between me and success, time, resources, and tools. And the same applies for everyone. Well, I love what your dad told you about basically like you can clean it or your name can be on it. Like, I think that is such a, like a wide spectrum, but it gives you, like, I think it's probably empowering to understand that you choose the path, you have

the options. Like, obviously there's an input, which choose the path. You have the options. Obviously there's an input, which is hard work. You can decide like how hard and how much, but like, I love that spectrum because it's like you said, it's options. And a lot of people, I think a lot of people go through life and they don't realize they have those options. Oh yeah. And then they feel backed into a corner and then they don't even try. What's your husband like? I was thinking the same thing. I know you guys met online.

We did. He's the polar opposite. So anyone who watches our show will see like I'm the gas and he's the brakes. Right. You know, like and that's he's an attorney. He's very like quiet and down to earth. And his whole thing is like, I trust that you probably have like you'll figure this out because he's seen me figure it out over and over again, like in crazier scenarios.

But he's also the type to be like, you know, okay, well, whatever happens, happens, you know, and that laid back energy tends to be a pretty good balance, you know, when it comes to the business and things like that. Sometimes I wish he'd be a little more fired up, but you know, I got it. He's a really good guy.

I mean, to take on all the responsibility with you and like. That's a lot of girls too. He didn't know what he was getting into. He didn't know what he was getting into. It's a lot of estrogen. We have two male dogs. So I'm balancing it out. Let him have his male dogs.

Let him have his male dogs. Just to let you know, if I do have three girls, I'm not getting male dogs. We're getting females. Just to do it. Just to get that good wife in right there. I mean,

there's obviously a lot of estrogen in this office. A lot of estrogen at home. I'm like, I got to, just give me a male dog. I got one dog, but he's a little Chihuahua named Boone. We have a Chihuahua named Joey Buttafuoco. Oh, yeah. He's been the best. Yeah.

I would love to talk about a little bit more your your career and where you got to now. Sure. So give us like now you're obviously seems to me you wake up, you work on your own terms, you have autonomy, you sort of can run your life. What was that gap like? The truth is with entrepreneurship, you don't know what you're doing. No one does when you first come in. Even if you understand the corporate thing and you understand sort of the steps and logistics, every day is going to be different. But that's part of the draw, right? You know, you don't know what you're going to get into. And I love to tell people your name is already being spoken about in rooms you're not even in. So opportunities are happening for me as we speak and they just haven't arrived to me yet. And that's

what entrepreneurship has been for me is that, you know, I was out there saying, look, my job right now is make income, right, and make a difference. And that's what I focus on every single day. And if I'm able to do that, opportunities just show up. So I was going live online. I was sharing sort of the journey. So people have seen me from the day that I quit my job to the day that I signed my TV deal, to the day that I signed my book deal, to the through the time that I've had my kids like the past seven years, it's all been documented. And on top of that, I've also created millionaires and launched products and done all these things. So it's this like weird twofold experience. But now I have a multimillion dollar consulting firm based out of Atlanta, Georgia. I've got

employees and staff and I have a top rated podcast and, you know, a TV show on USA Network and, you know, a major seven figure book deal. It's wild. And just if anyone's wondering about book deals, a seven figure book deal is very lucrative and exclusive. That's not something that's handed out. Yeah, my agent, I'm repped by CAA and my agent was like, I only get like two or three of these a year. And I was like, thank you. It's extremely rare. Yeah, that's very rare.

I'm really excited about it. Well, yesterday I saw a post and I would love for you to talk about that because I feel like you addressed it head on. And you can kind of, Michael has not seen it yet. They wouldn't tell me what it was. I'm going to learn right now. So this happens. It's normal, right? Like it's not normal. I should say just because something is normal doesn't mean it should be normalized. Right. But talking about women's bodies, paying attention to their bodies, weight loss books are the top books at the top of every chart. And during the past seven years, because people have seen me, you know, all during this online journey, I've lost, you know, now close to 90 pounds. But it took a long time. You know, like I would say that's been over the span of almost five years and like I've kept it off and people want the answer to be something

snazzy, you know, like what tea did you use or what blah, blah, blah. And it's like, no, it's like diet, exercise, hard work and listening to my doctors and doing everything that they told me to do. You know, it's just it's not like a sexy story. So it's why I haven't made it my platform or shared it because it just isn't necessary. Right. But the thing that I've also shared all during that time was I liked myself fat. Like that was actually part of why I didn't lose weight right away was because I still think I look good and I still do. When I look at those photos, I'm like, I look cute that day. Like, I look really good. It was that I wanted to be healthy enough for my journey.

So it's not cute for me to get on stage and be out of breath because they seem that they pay that same price point for me out of breath that they did for me fit and healthy. Let me give people their best, you know, so that I'm able to give them the high energy show they paid for. So that was why I lost weight, just to keep up with my purpose, not because I was dissatisfied with myself. So I've shared some of that journey online and the response has been mixed, right? Some people are really supportive and overwhelmingly so. Like, way to go. We've seen you get healthy. And there've been highs and lows. I've put on a couple, lost a couple. You know, whenever it happens, I let people know, right? Like real life ups and downs. But then there's the other side of it, you know, where people feel like just because you put yourself out there, they have a right to comment on anything and everything about you. Like what

is a boundary, right? And I think that if there's anything I can say, it's that there's this context, this belief that just because you're an influencer or just because you share what you know, that you aren't entitled to respect, to boundary, to privacy. And none of that is true. Just common decency. Just common decency. And it's not okay. You know, it's fiercely not okay because it's symptomatic of how we are starting to treat ourselves in society as a whole. Just this lack of caring of each other. And I don't encourage it. The only thing I encourage is symptomatic of how we are starting to treat ourselves in society as a whole, just this lack of caring of each other. And I don't encourage it. The only thing I encourage is everyone using

their personal personal agency to unfollow. You know what I mean? Create a world that you want to be. People use the excuse like, well, you put yourself out there. You put yourself out there. This comes with that. This comes with that. It's a way to justify poor behavior. And it just isn't. It's like saying that if your kid, you know, goes to school, they're allowed to be bullied. Well, if you don't want them to be bullied, keep them at home. Are you kidding me? It doesn't make any sense. You know, like just what value does it come from? From, you know, you can hold people accountable without criticizing their being, their core, you know, and it's the cheap shots that hurt. So that said, I posted and actually the thing I posted was about

my book. I actually said, like, you know, I'm working on this book and I'm kind of nervous about it, but I'm making progress. I'm feeling good, you know. But in the picture, I had a crop top on, you know, and it wasn't even like super cropped. I was like baggy jeans. I don't give a fuck if your under tits were hanging out and your nipples were a wreck. So what? Right.

Unfollow if you don't like it. If you don't like it or just keep your comments to yourself. You know what I mean? It's your house. It's my house. It's my body. My man likes it. You know, like, I don't see what the issue is. Right. But, you know, someone felt the need to say and I think it was the style of their message that was like particularly

crazy. But they were like, yeah, you know, what message are you sending wearing? Well, no. First, it was you look great. You know, those like those fake bless it like I'm from the south. So bless your heart. You know, it's like not really a compliment. You look great. But I just I really have noticed that since you've started like losing some weight that you're wearing a little less, you know, and you're more crop tops. And I just wonder what message you're sending to women, to future leaders and of anything to men, to other men. And I was like,

so I get the message at first. And thankfully I have a strong sense of self because this could break someone else. Like people don't even realize what if I was losing weight because I was sick? What if I was losing weight because I was stressed? What if I, you know, people don't recognize that even if you're overweight, you can still have an eating disorder like anorexia. You know, it just may not reflect the same way as someone who has severe anorexia. So they have no idea what I could be dealing with when they project something like that. But my response to it, fortunately, because I'm well, you know, was simply it's hot outside. I'm hot. And that's it. You know, best of luck to you. My thing with every everyone, though, growing up, like when I was little, I were in high school. I was always like pushing my boobs up and I had

really, really blonde hair. And like Michael used to always say to me, people aren't seeing like the other side of you. And for me, I was, I was kind of okay with that because I think we were, we're kind of living in a time and hopefully it's getting better where you can be simultaneously pushed up with fake boobs and blonde hair or whatever it looks like a crop top on a hot summer's day and also be a fucking badass in the boardroom. Where is this thing that we can't be a bunch of different things and be multifaceted? You guys have seen this everywhere, and that is the benefits of an infrared sauna. But this is from the comfort of your own

home. So little story. We were staying at this hotel in New York, and they had this place called Higher Dose. And I was absolutely obsessed with it. So it was like a sauna and an infrared sauna, and you would go in and you would just sweat it out and feel so amazing afterwards. But now Higher Dose has created something that you can do from the comfort of your own home. And that is higher doses, portable sauna blanket. This makes it really easy to get hot and high. Like it makes you high. I'm not joking from anywhere. So here's the deal. You get the blanket, you lay down inside of it, you turn up the heat and you sweat it out. This is amazing. If you're not feeling good, you're hungover, or just if you

want like an extra kick in the ass in the morning. I think this is like such a good addition to your wellness routine. You burn 600 calories in it, which I had to go do all this research. That is so crazy. 600 calories in one sweat session. So what does infrared therapy do? It supports glowing skin, deeper sleep, a balanced mood. And it's really interesting as your core temperature heats up, your brain actually releases a dose of happy chemicals. And this is why when you get out, you feel euphoric. You should also know that the heat instantly boosts blood flow and circulation. So you just get really pretty skin, a boosted mood and decreased bloat. We love decreasing bloat on the Skinny Confidential if you can't tell. Shit, you should

just ice roll while you're taking your array in your sauna blanket. I mean, what's better than that? Okay, so no need to go to the spa. You can do it from home anytime you want. I love this because it's saving you time. If you're not into the heat, don't worry. They also have this infrared PEMF mat, and this recharges your cells to help you feel relaxed and grounded. It just kind of depends what your preference is. So get your own infrared sauna blanket or an infrared PEMF mat today at higherdose.com. You can use promo code SKINNY at checkout. You are going to save $75. That's higher dose.com. H I G H E R D O S E.com promo code skinny, or just go to higher dose.com slash skinny to get your $75 off today. Enjoy. You're going to love it. Add that with the fact that I'm like openly talking about being a Christian.

Apparently when you're a Christian, you can't comma period. Can't do all these things. That's in the Bible. I think it's in there somewhere. It's a big book. Pull that page up Taylor. It's a really big book. So I'm sure there's somewhere in there where the Lord hath come down and said,

no crop tops, you know, somewhere in there. I missed it. Was it Eve butt naked? Eve, I believe I was born that way. So I don't know about you guys, but, you know, I was definitely born with my belly out. But either way, you know,

I think what's unfortunate is that you're in this, we're in this world where people want to project their own judgments, you know, and they expect you to fit into this context. And I'm not responsible

for the pedestal that you put me on, you know, and I don't ask to be put on one because it's only a place to fall. And I've done nothing but embrace my imperfections and say like, look, I am not perfect, but all I'm trying to do is try every day. And we need to grant each other grace as we are trying to figure this life out. We also need to grant each other grace to be able to change our opinion. If today I like grapes for breakfast and tomorrow I like cereal for breakfast, don't hold me to this holier than now, what my opinion is. We are normal people.

Normal people. It's that whole abundance and scarcity mindset. I hear your story. We just met today, but briefly. And I'm like, this is an extremely empowering story. It's an incredible story it's an incredible story, right? Like, and I look at it as like, wow, like look at what one human being, like look at all the things someone can accomplish. Right. And then I think you can go the other way where you can get very bitter and angry, but that's, I think that's, that's when you have to like self-search and be like, why is this hitting me this way? Cause we should celebrate stories like yours, right? It it should it should excite other people like i can do that too or i can get there too by the way also to piss the troll off that said that you also play the piano and cello so let's just add that on top let's just go ahead

and you know sprinkle on it you know fucking cello and a crop top yeah how many things are you going to say on this episode to keep shocking me like what the hell else is going on honestly though like you can play the cello and the piano and be a badass and wear a crop top. Right, right. Let me live my life. Let me live my life. I think what what you said, Michael, though, is like so on the money. I what I always try to remind myself is whenever people look at someone's success and they just don't understand, you have a choice. You can say, can you show me how or tell me more, you know, which is the choice of someone who's responsible and willing and, you know,

wanting change in their own life and growth. And then there's the other side of it. You can throw out things to dismantle it because the vision of their success challenges your own lack. And it's hard to believe there's a world where someone is winning that may look like you or be close to you or have the same resources. So you want to dismantle it. It's like, oh, well,

that's because she has more money or, oh, that's because she has this hair or she's skinny or she's this. Look, I got rich fat, you know, with no money, no help. I'm totally debt free now. No loans, no investors, no partners. You know, nobody helped me do any of that stuff. I mean, I had a team and people who have helped me along the way, but I started scrappy. I built my blog for my cell phone, you know? So it's one of those things where that can be difficult for people to absorb.

And I recognize that, where they want me to have these massive things because then maybe that'll justify them staying where they are longer. But you're not responsible for their insecurity. Not at all. No, but it's like, you know, we all know those people and they look at someone like, well, that person is there only because of this.

Only because. This person gave them, they grew up this way, they had this. And I understand that. But what I always tell people that have that mentality, I'm like, that's not going to serve you. It's not. It's going to hold you back. And the person that you're projecting that on, it doesn't have no effect on them either.

They're going to keep going and keep winning. So you've got to flip that and be like, well, if they can do it, what can I do to also do it? I always look at things like that because no matter what level of success you have in your life, there's always somebody further along the road that makes what you're doing not nearly as successful as what they're doing. And I think always looking to win and saying, okay, like what else, how can I do that? How can I be better? Instead of saying like, well, I'll never get there because they had X, Y, Z. Absolutely. I mean, all the time that you're sitting there, you know, judging what you think they're doing, you're missing all the lessons. A hundred percent. And you're giving yourself a reason why you shouldn't have what they have. Or just joy. Like I just enjoy following Lauren.

Do you know what I mean? Like I just enjoy it I just enjoy following Lauren. Do you know what I mean? Like I just enjoy it. I enjoy following you. Thank you. Like it's not like a situation of need. I love how I do think that you bless me sometimes because you'll bring either products into my life where I'm like, I didn't know this and I needed it. Like your ice roller.

I didn't even know that was a thing. You know what I mean? And I'm out here dealing with bloat for the first time, like over 30, you know? Well, you're getting one. Thank you. I need that. I was like, I really, and I will be, I'm literally, everyone's getting rolled. I was saying this. I was like, I'm out here dealing with bloat for the first time, like over 30, you know, you're getting one. Thank you. I need that. I was like, I really, I will be, I'm literally, everyone's

getting rolled. I was saying this. I was like, I'm going to be rolling to people on the street. Like, let me just help you just stay still. You're welcome. Yes. And headscarves. Do you want to tell us her business? Just a side note. Oh, you're so kind. Yeah. It's called Summer Arrow. It's my summer arrow on Instagram and it's just summerarrow.com. Cute. Online. Thank you. And is there one we should start with or is there? It? It's only so this is like a business thing. She doesn't have too many stock keeping units. She keeps it really simple. So it's one design,

but it comes in several colors and it fits everyone. It's amazing. Thank you for that. I love it. I love it. I'm super excited. You mentioned weight loss.

I know that you don't like to talk about it too much. You told me off air. Maybe you can speak on that if you want to. There are people I'm sure that are struggling with weight. And what I liked what you said is there's no magic secret. Was it just working out, eating healthy? What did you make changes fast, slow? Did you do a program? What did you do? So the biggest thing that I think a lot of people forget is your weight isn't just like for a goal. So I'd always treated it like that, where it was like, oh, I want to get skinny for this thing. Or, oh, I want to get fit for this thing. Instead of saying to

myself, oh, every day when I look at my plate, I need to choose life every single day. So what am I choosing? Now, choosing life doesn't mean I always eat grass. You know, like it means that, you know, for me, for my life, it may be improved by eating this donut today. Do you know what I mean? Like, and this is worth it. I'm choosing life in its richness as well. But I have to be intentional about what I'm doing rather than mindlessly consuming. And that applies to social media. That applies to your business. It applies to your food.

And once I made that shift, which it's not surprising, it came along with entrepreneurship and more personal development and all that. It just became really hard to not respect myself by treating my body well. You know, it's a it's a self-worth thing. And therapy helps with that, too. I'm a big therapy fan, you know, and my whole family spent a mortgage on therapy. So it's like, you know, knowing all of those things just became easier for me to say, like, I deserve to treat myself well.

And so that's what happened. And I don't talk about it much just because, again, people are obsessed with our bodies. They're just obsessed with like, what's your secret? What's your trick? What's your this? The answer is that no matter what I tell you, it's still your own journey. And it's so dangerous for me to play in that space as not an expert when people's bodies are so different. And it's such an intimate, personal relationship with what messaging you've been told, what your goals are. The best place to start is with your doctor. Go to your doctor, believe what they say, you know, and apply what you need to know and just do the work. You'll see the changes. What's something that people would be surprised to

know about you? You've shared so much online. What's something surprising? I am able to artificially inseminate a cow. What? What? See, see, what does that mean? Plot twist. So growing up, I grew up, I went to boarding school in Hershey, Pennsylvania. So I was part of farm club and 4-H. So I used to show cows, raise and breed and shear sheep. And I used to show rabbits at the farm show in Pennsylvania. So I also know how to artificially inseminate a cow and rear them. You said you were ready for the apocalypse. I really am. I am your apocalypse friend. You can take fake sperm

and put it into a cow. A real sperm and put it into a cow. It's definitely not fake sperm. Do you stick it up their nipple? No, you actually take your whole arm. I was like, you know how science works can you explain this to me yeah i told you i was oblivious i am so fucked if i have to go through the apocalypse with lauren i'm gonna no no no just text me just text me if you have to

save humanity you're gonna be there shoving things up nipples wait you shove it obviously shove it up the cow's vagina right yeah so what does the cow vagina look like you shove it, obviously shove it up the cow's vagina. Right. Yeah. So what does the cow vagina look like? You insert it into their ears. I guess I would say it looks like a giant people vagina almost. Taylor, don't get any ideas. Yeah. So like what you do is you wear a really long glove that goes up almost to your shoulder because everything's very deep.

Their cervix is like further back. And then I know these are real sciencey things. And then you lube yourself up real good. Obviously, like out of respect to the cow. You probably asked the cow's name, maybe. The cow would love some lube because the cow wants coconut oil lube. Don't be using KY.

Right, I know. We got to be like respectful. And then- This show gets weirder and weirder. Well, we didn't think it'd go there, but let's just say that we brought value today. So still- And you just stick it up there.

That's it. You just go in there and up to your shoulder and then you artificially inseminate. It's like a a tube thingy but why can't the cow just be fucked well the cow could be but you also want to make sure what a scientific way to say it i mean it's the science of it you know but you do want to make sure that like first of all that all your cows are okay and also the odds right like this is far more specific far more precise and if you want to have additional calves this is what you want to do. So, so maybe you can get Michael's sperm and you can artificially inseminate me if he pisses me off. I need a finer. Well, I don't think I need a long glove, right? Like, I mean, that'd be intense

since we're going to talk about, you know, right now. I mean, this is how it is. We go everywhere. We go everywhere. Keep it classy. I know you're going to have a really good answer for me on this question. Okay. What's your morning routine? Oh, my gosh. So here is the answer. So every entrepreneur is like, I wake up at 4 a.m. I meditate.

You know, I fix my cup of coffee and I do these 10 things. The first I tried that, right? Like that was my first few years because that's how you're supposed to do entrepreneurship. And then I was like, no, who am I? So I started paying attention to what my natural routine was, which is I like to wake up late. Homegirl loves a sleep in. You know what I mean? And that is not popular to say, but it's the truth.

And I'd rather stay up just a little later on the back end and have a sleep in. So what I did was I built a routine around my real life routine. So I don't like talking to anyone before 1130. So don't put a call on my calendar before then I'll wake up and work, but I don't want to talk to people. So I stopped putting calls there and it just, I get so much more done because I'm not trying to pretend to fit into someone else's routine. So I wake up, I kind of like bustle around a little bit, take my shower. Like I'm really into my skincare. So I do my skincare stuff, you know, and I eat, drink like that sort of thing. And then I like to sit a little bit, you know, if I can deal with the kids, whatever. And then I kind of ease into my day. That's just what I prefer. I'd rather tack it down on the back end. I'm a fan of sleep too. I think there's

been this like weird thing with entrepreneurs where we're not supposed to sleep. I think sleep is one of the most important things to make me effective. Well, we learned, like we, we had this whole discussion with, with Ben Greenfield on this show. I'm an expert on all this stuff. And he said, some people circadian rhythm, like some people are morning, some people are evening and it's okay. Like you can't force yourself to be something you're not. And like people try to do that five a.m. thing. If they're not that type of person, like it's just not going to work for them. Well, I think you guys had Dr. Amen on the show too, right? And he'll tell you all day,

like with your brain, like if you don't sleep, like you're creating baby holes in your brain, like it's not a good thing. Like you actually need to sleep. So lean in on that. I totally agree with you on sleep. I like at least nine hours. And if Michael talks to me before a certain time, I'm like nightmare. And people don't think it's like, I'm super, super nice in the afternoon. Do you know what I mean? And like, that is okay. I try to do that 5am thing too for a while. And I did it for a while. And now I'm like, I'm going to get up naturally when I feel like to wake up at about seven. Yeah. Now I'm like, like now with the child, you know, I'm up when she's up. Yeah. When she lets you, right. I wake up at seven, but if I could pick

when I wake up, it would be eight. Yeah. Same. Same. Yeah. And it's, and the thing about it is that is healthy. It's functional. I get all my stuff done. Do you know what I mean? Like, and that's what matters. So I'd rather stay up a little later. Like also I like to go out with my friends. I like a nice dinner, you know, like these are things that are conducive to like, you know, a later start in the day. So what about wind down? Do you have any things that you do when you wind down? Absolutely. So, um, I started with, you know, my kids because I didn't, you know, I was making up parenting as I went because I didn't do infancy. So like, it's not like I prepared. It's not like I had any of that stuff. So one of the things I learned with my little one who didn't have a sleep

routine when we got her because she was like kind of free range child, you know, that sort of thing was that she needed to wind down time, like before bedtime. So yes, bedtime was this time, but bedtime started like 45 minutes before that. And so I've actually kept that now that she's older where I'm like, okay, starting to wind down, you know, like I'm turning off devices. I'm walking around the house, you know, like I'm drinking some water, you know, I like to shower before bed because there's just, I like getting into bed clean, you know, it's also good for sex, right? Like, you know, it's just like you're extra fresh or whatever. So so I do all those things, you know, and then that allows me to like, you know, be in a good place and I go to sleep. One of my favorite things, this kind of goes into to winding down as we took all the light bulbs

out of our lights in our bedroom and we replaced them with red light. And I'm like, I don't know why I'm so sensitive to artificial light, especially when I'm winding down. I don't need the lamps. I don't even want the lights on ever. Like it's either natural light or it's red light. There's no in between. No, I will so take that tip because I feel like you would love that.

I would love that. Just take the light bulbs out. You don't even want to use them anyway. Well, and it's your bedroom. So like, it's just like I have never had a TV in my bedroom because I heard that you have less sex if you have a TV in your bedroom. We just got rid of our TV in our bedroom.

It's an actual thing. Who was right about that? Nicole just said. It's an actual thing. He asked me, he goes, are you sure you don't want a TV in our bedroom? I said. Well, she watches,

you got all the housewives on all the time. Yeah, but I can watch housewives, but I don't want to watch a huge screen. We sleep way better. Better sex, better sleep. Yeah, it's. Yeah. It's way better. It's having a TV in your room too. If I wasn't on my phone all day, that's one thing. But now this culture, we're all addicted to our phones. I need a break. Yeah. And you'll get up

and like find yourself just like in bed on a weekend. And it's like, man, I just lost all this time. And it's like, no, I also feel like this, there's no science behind this that I know of, but it might be a thing like energetically having these plugged in devices feels like a lot in my room. Do you know, like, I don't need these like, I was like, it's a thing, you know, so it is totally down. It's you know, what's so weird. You're going to think this is so weird. Michael has this room and it's 20,000 electronics. It's like printer, your man cave in LA. It's like printer, juve, chargers, everything. And when you go in there, your energy gets weird.

And the baby never goes in this room because she doesn't like it. And so I totally agree with you having all these plugs in your room. It can't be healthy. It's a thing. And I mean, just think about it. All the stuff you would do.

And I tell this to every mom, all the stuff you do for your kid. Why did you stop doing it for yourself? So did you put a TV in your baby's room? Did you are you like obsessed about like BPAs and plastics and natural foods and organics? And you slavage your child in sunscreen before you went out. You gave him a hat. You did all these things. So at what point were you like, now it's OK for me to kill myself? Like at what point did you stop doing it for you? So I always try to remember that, you know, and same thing applies with like your inner thoughts. So whenever I have something, I'm like, man, I'm not good at this or I'm not that I'm like, would I say that to my daughter? I wouldn't, you know, oh, that idea is terrible. You'll never succeed. Would I say that to my daughter's face? No. So don't say it to yourself. So it

really, really helps a lot especially with like my living you know like would I feed this my kid would I give my kid a coke at you know 10 o'clock at night probably not I probably shouldn't do it for me either you know yeah Michael's like I end end wellness and beauty things that you do so I am really passionate it's actually like part of my brand if you will about two things eyebrows and exfoliation that you do? So I am really passionate. It's actually like part of my brand, if you will, about two things, eyebrows and exfoliation. If you don't have good eyebrows, you can't watch my kids. You can't do my taxes like I don't trust you. Like stay away from me. Like Michael needs to brush his up. Yeah, it's like an actual thing. And good eyebrows just

means like either self-restraint. So you're not doing too much. Right. Or like well-shaped and manicured with intention. Either way, that just it's eyebrow personality. But like when they are just reckless, you know what I mean? It's just kind of like, I can't let you near my things. You know, my eyebrows. Oh, no, they're good. They're well-maintained. They're full. You know, we just got to brush them up. But yeah. Yeah. So there's that. And then the other part is exfoliation. So so many people think that they have crap skin, but it's just because they're putting trash on top of trash on top of trash. And exfoliation is a thing where we're never really, we're told about like washing your face and moisturizing your face, but no one talks about the importance of like sloughing off your old

skin so that that way everything else works better, you know? And so for me, I've been exfoliating since I was 13. So literally people are like, your skin's so amazing. Oh my gosh. It's because this is my 13 year old skin. No new skin has ever settled on it. I have literally just sloughed it off whenever it tried, you know, what exfoliator do you use? I wish I got to interview you for my book. Oh no, it's okay. Next one, right? Next one, right? We'll put it out in the world. So I'm actually coming out with my own exfoliating product. So that is, of course I am. So just because a lot of people don't know how to exfoliate and so they're using the wrong thing

all the time, you know, so it's either too harsh or like they're using, you know, St. Eve's apricot. Throw that shit away. I was just about to say it. I was like, first of all, it's not even apricot scrub.

It's it's walnut seeds. Second of all, if you were to microscopically look at those up close, this is in your book. If people haven't read the book, grab the book. You all this stuff is there. Like I all, if you were to microscopically look at those up close, this is in your book. If people haven't read the book, grab the book. You, all this stuff is there. Like I'm not telling you anything you don't, you don't need to know already, but it's, if you look

at them, they look like little daggers, like each of them. And you are literally doing micro cuts on your face. Like why, like, why would you do that? You know? So in any case, we graduate, you know, graduate your grow up, you know, and glow up a little better. So I use a daily exfoliator that I'm working on, you know, made from a rice powder that it's just the shape of it on a molecular level is the right shape to, you know, gently exfoliate your face. And it's just kind of fail proof, you know, so I use that and it's my game changer. I can't function without it. I can't wait to try that. When I first met Michael, he was using like old spice and apricot scrub in his shower. Yeah, you did. You did. You didn't have that one. Probably did. See, this is how you know it's real love because I would never like, no, you just so single. No, but here's my thing. You can refine it slowly over time to get it how you want it.

But when I walked into that, I was like, we don't know how the hell would we, we don't, nobody taught me this. Well, that was one of my favorite chapters of the book was kind of like, how do you get your man, you know, on board, you know, I'm going to give you a book report. I love it. I just thought, well, no, it's just the truth though, because I care about skincare. You know what I mean? And people don't understand, like if you didn't believe in it before, believe in it now, like with the pandemic, it's just keeps you ready. So like the two things that I love, love, love that you talk about in your book also is self-tanner. First of all, it was a game changer for me. Self-tanner. Which one?

I use tanner drops from Ulta. Just like they're really inexpensive. They're $7. And the self-tanner drops, I just mix it with my moisturizer. Now, because I'm a dark skinned black woman, people are like, but why would you use tanner drops? Doesn't make sense. I use it. So I don't have to use foundation. We still have color variants, you know, no matter what shade your skin is, where maybe your cheeks are a little lighter or, you know. Don't tell me you're not wearing foundation right now. I am wearing I'm wearing powder over my face.

I'm using just like a morphe light powder, but I don't have a liquid foundation on right now. So and then I have a little under eye powder, but that's it. Looks very good. Thank you. I can literally wake up. And if I don't want to wear makeup, I don't have to because I use these tanner drops. So it keeps my complexion even without me having to have the pressure of makeup and

definitely no sun damage. I'm going to try that tanner drops with moisturizer. Yeah, with moisturizer, just a couple of tanner drops because it's so light, you know, and it just evens out the complexion. And that's like a game changer for me. Like I swear by it. And then, oh, and vitamin C serum. That's the other brand I buy. I use a brand that's organic that I get on Amazon, a small batch called Eva that I love. And so those are the things I use just like an exfoliating product. I can't wait to try your exfoliator. It's going to

be amazing. Just there's nothing like it on the market, you know? And we, I think, you know, just like, I'm not reinventing exfoliators, just like how you drastically improved on ice rollers. You know, it's like, that's what it's about. We're not asking. You're updating a category. Oh, it's updating a category. Exactly.

It's like, you know, Steve Jobs didn't invent the phone. He just took buttons off of it, you know? And it made it so much better for our whole life. And so you did the same thing with ice rollers. Like the worst thing about them is that they break all the time. They don't hold cold. They don't hold cold. They're not cute. They look ugly. They don't fit your face and you can't get up in there. And they're plastic. Yeah. You can't get up in there. I didn't want that. Yeah. I want it to feel like, and they're also not like pretty, pretty, you know, or they're

too pretty and they don't function. You want an experience with whatever you're doing. I think that's important. Well, what I like about yours is you never look dumb using it. Do you know what I mean? Like you can you can you can roll anywhere. Like I'd be rolling in the car, you know, and not looking crazy. And people would probably just be like, what are you doing? It looks good. Like it looks comfortable.

Looks like you're spoiling yourself, you know. So that's very, very nice. Well, it's very, very true. Zaza is going to call your daughter when she turns two and start her business. I'm here for it. She should call me. I'm the consultant. But she can get some motivation.

Mommy's going to be like Kris Jenner. I'm here for it. I'm here for it. You are absolutely incredible. You can come back anytime you want. There were so many more questions that I would have loved to have asked you that are more niche. So come back anytime when your book comes out. Thank you. When your product comes out.

In the meantime, if someone wants to consult with you, where can they find you? Where can they follow you? Pimp yourself out. All right. Well, you can learn everything about me. Keep up with the show, which you can watch all of season one on USA Network dot com streaming. You can find out when the book comes out. You can listen to the podcast, the Nicole Walters podcast. All the details are at NicoleWalters.com. And do we know the name of the book or is it not out yet? The name has not been released yet.

Well, when it's out, post it on your Instagram story. And really quick, one more time, your daughter's line, her Instagram handle. Yes, you can just go to SummerArrow.com or at MySummerArrow. Amazing. Thank you for coming on. Thank you for having me. We are giving away a copy of Get the Fuck Out of the Sun. It is my book available on Amazon, Barnes and Noble, Target, and where all small books are sold. All you have to do is tell us your favorite part of this episode with Nicole on my latest Instagram at Lauren Bostic. Make sure you guys follow Nicole. She's absolutely incredible. Support her daughter's business. It is so cute. I went and stocked it.

And on that note, we'll see you next time.