The Skinny Confidential Him & Her Podcast - Stassi Schroeder On Life After Cancellation, Being A New Mom, Vanderpump Rules, & Lessons Along The Way

Episode Date: May 23, 2022

#463: Stassi Schroeder is a former star of reality show Vanderpump Rules, New York Times Bestselling Author, and new mom. If you haven’t listened to Stassi’s first episode with us, head back to episode #241 and see how her life has changed since January of 2020. Today we sit down with Stassi to discuss her journey with cancellation, and her life after reality TV. We also talk about how she lost the post-baby weight, the projects she has been working on, and if she would ever return to the reality tv world. To connect with Lauryn Evarts click HERE To connect with Michael Bosstick click HERE Read More on The Skinny Confidential HERE For Detailed Show Notes visit TSCPODCAST.COM This episode is brought to you by Feel Free from Botanic Tonics. If you are looking for an alcohol alternative try this euphoric kava drink and get 40% off your order or subscription by using either code SKINNY40 or code SKINNY240 at www.botanictonics.com  Produced by Dear Media 

The following podcast is a Dear Media production. and they are cute, you guys. We need to see more pink sweatshirts in first class. We need to see more pink sweatshirts at the golf course, dive bars, football games, and high-level meetings. We need to see more pink sweatshirts in the boys club, okay? Because we can wear a pink sweater and be a boss at the same time. That's why it's called obnoxious. We can be as obnoxious as we want and still be bossy. The first one is the meh. This one is so cute. It's like nostalgic Barbie vibes, little lilac, lot of pink. Then we have mommy's busy honey because de-puffing is a priority. This one says mommy's busy honey and then ice rolls. It's the perfect tone of purple that pops the whites of your eyes and teeth. And then we have the TSC icon. This one's like very Nantucket. It's a crisp white. It has a little bit of strawberry pink and lavender embroidered on it. It's very chic. And then lastly, of course,

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Check it out today. Again, try the ones I recommended, but also they have so many different offerings that you can jump into for whatever your health needs may be. She's a lifestyle blogger extraordinaire. Fantastic. And he's a serial entrepreneur. A very smart cookie. And now Lauren Everts and Michael Bostic are bringing you along for the ride. Get ready for some major realness. Welcome to the Skinny Confidential, him and her. I need to also educate myself a little more, understand what's going on a little more, and just take a time out. Like, take a really long time out and figure it out. I know that in our industry, it's like, you constantly feel like you need to be working,

doing something else, creating something else. But the best thing that I did for myself was literally nothing. The episode that you've been waiting for. Welcome back to the Skinny Confidential Him and Her Show. Today, we have Stassi Schroeder back on the show. She's in a new chapter in life. It's been a long time since we've seen Stassi. Lots happened for her since then. And in this episode, we explore it all. We talk about her cancellation, her new book, her new baby, her new husband, leaving Vanderpump Rules, her wedding, diet, health, fitness, wellness. All the things are packed in this episode. I personally love having her on the show because she's really damn good at podcasting. Yeah. She's one of the OGs in the space.

And I think this episode's very interesting because we've obviously known Stassi for a while. We had her on the show a long time ago before all of the controversy that she's went to that we talk about openly on this show. And I think for people that are coming into this episode wondering what this is going to be about, we have the court of public opinion. It is running rampant. Stassi has been at the receiving end of that. And I just think it's a very interesting human experiment to sit down with

someone who's been on such a severe receiving end of, like I said, the court of public opinion, which she definitely has. So who is Stassi Schroeder? She is the New York Times bestselling author. She's written two New York Times bestselling books, you guys, Next Level Basic and recently Off With My Head. She's a fan favorite from Bravo's Vanderpump Rules, and she now has The Good, The Bad, and The Baby with her husband, Beau. Stassi is an author, a mother, a wife, a former podcast host, a public figure, and a personality. And like I said, in this episode, she delivers. With that, let's welcome Stassi back to the Skinny Confidential Him and Her Show. This is the Skinny Confidential Him and Her.

Okay, how the fuck do you look so good after having a baby? Okay, first of all, it's been like 15, 16 months since I had a baby. And it was the hardest thing ever to fit back into my clothes. It took me a little over a year. And Lauren, I literally texted you multiple times after I gave birth being like, I'm sobbing, I'm crying. I haven't lost a pound. In fact, I've gained more weight after like giving birth. I was swollen for two weeks. I couldn't like, I could barely move. Like it has taken so much work. It was not one of those situations where it's like genetics and the baby just fell off.

It was just really easy. No, I had to. I did bone broth for dinner for like four to five months. Like I worked out and ran like four miles a day. Like I tried so hard and that did not work like that did not work it didn't start working and also i don't want to say like i'm no expert so like i'm not giving advice like nutrition and diet i love when an expert when a non-expert gives advice like this like if people i don't i don't need anybody coming after me being like you're basically preaching starving

yourself and running a million miles a day no this, this is just what I have done. But once I started just doing kind of like intermittent fasting, like I don't get hungry in the morning. So like I wait until like I actually get hungry. And like that's kind of what I then became like my diet. And obviously, like I'm not overeating and I had to just like really focus on small portions. but I started doing EMS workouts okay and that is literally changed my life it is changed when I say Lauren I have never had muscles or been someone that was like athletic like I was like I was fine but like I've never felt strong like if I took off my cardigan right now, I have like... You got the guns?

I have like guns. I feel strong. My back feels strong. My legs feel strong. And it's just 20 minutes a week. Wait, explain what it is. Is this what Tara was talking to me about the other day? It's like a machine, right? So it's...

Oh, I guess my phone is in here. It's the Bridgerton theme song. It's my ringtone. How long is this? Oh my God. Yep, that's my phone. Sorry about that. It's like...

What is that thing that when they zap, like they put... Like pulse? You know, the... Oh God. Like the little white things? No, like when they put this big block on you and zap, and it's basically getting 18,000 crunches in one session waiting there. So you literally lay there?

No, this is not it. Okay. So you put on a suit where there's things wrapped around your arms. Oh, I've heard about this thing. It's a full-blown vest on your legs. I look like I'm getting suited up for Mission Impossible 14, whatever movie they're on. How many times a week? I do it once a week, 20 minutes.

So you work out while this machine is zapping your muscles. And it is so hard. And afterwards, you are sore for five days. And then I have two days off of not being sore. And then I started again. Did the guy that invented this, he's he's here right or he's around here I'm pretty sure this is an LA thing right now which is why I haven't really like posted about it because not many people have access to it but it is legit I'm telling you is this what Lala did on Vanderpump rules yes so that's how I found out about it because Katie and Lala did it on Vanderpump

and they were like, you have to try this. And I was like, I will try anything at this point because running every day isn't doing shit. Drinking bone broth at night isn't doing shit. This truly like, your muscles are constantly just like,

like burning things off. I swear to God. It makes, it's more of like like it's like an efficient workout because you're getting the workout in in like in 20 minutes in like a on steroids on crack way which makes sense you guys i'm trying to convince myself google google it it seriously just google it it's okay i'm gonna try it afterwards it's fucking amazing so i need to do that after i give birth intermittent fast and have bone broth.

You're the one who told me about bone broth. I feel like I might have told you about bone broth. I'm pretty sure it was you. Cause it's protein. And those were just like miserable nights, like literally miserable nights, just watching Bo have normal dinner. And I'm just drinking bone broth that he tried putting,

like he would try so hard to like make it be like soup and put like spices in it and, you know, just different things. I'm like, no, this sucks. Just all of it sucks. It just sucks. But at least you can have a margarita because when you're pregnant, you can't have that. So I would rather have my skinny margarita

or like my glass of wine with ice in it than food. Same. Is that what you're going to say? So my bone broth, like my side of wine. Yeah in it, then food, same. Is that what you're going to say? So my bone broth, like my side of wine. Yeah. That's what I want. No,

100%. As long as I can have a cocktail with what I'm doing. Yes. I'm on the same page. Michael decided that he was going to go sober for 140 days. Well, I know. What day are you on?

I'm on like 110 or something. That is so impressive. Well, you know, I did like 70 days last year. And then I was like, oh, okay. And then she got, I mean, we haven't been doing much. You know, we just been like working. No, we haven't been doing much.

I've been building a nose and an eye. I mean, like in our social world, right? It's just been like, we've been kind of like head down. Really? Because I feel like you guys are always somewhere. Well, I mean, like this is our social setting. Oh, geez. Do I need to watch the show Bridgington? Are you joking? I don't know about it. Really? Because I feel like you guys are always somewhere. Well, I mean, this is our social setting. Do I need to watch the show Bridgington?

Are you joking? I don't know about it. I've never heard of this show. This is like how you are with Taylor Swift, and I don't know about that. No, I'm not like a big Swift. I like Taylor Swift. Oh, I thought you really liked her. No, that's somebody else, but I mean, I like her. But Bridgington is that... Bridgington? What the fuck is wrong with you? How do you even have a podcast and not. But Bridgington is that... Bridgington? What the fuck is wrong with you?

What's it called? Like, how do you even have a podcast and not know what Bridgerton is? I have no idea how to pronounce it. How do you say it? Bridgerton. Bridgerton. Bridgerton. What is it about?

Sounds a little... Oh, my... Like, for real? It's... Yeah. Is it... What's that one show? It takes place in the Regency...

Downtown Abbey? Is that what it is? It's not... Is it Downtown or Downton? Downton. Downton. It's Downton. I thought it was downtown too.

It's Downton. Totally different. They're both period pieces. They're both historical shows. And that's like my, that's like my sweet spot. But why is it so good? You like the outfits? It's like Gossip Girl meets like the early 1800s but is it like more of a nightmare

I don't know how period PC I am okay no I like a good historical drama I don't know how period PC I am though yeah that period PC is like the only word I know to like describe myself I would rather watch housewives see no I can't do that anymore I just feel a little too close once I once everything went down I'm like well obviously I can't watch Bravo anymore because that hurts like you needed space I definitely and now that I'm out of it like I obviously I watched Vanderpump Rules to see Katie my friends and stuff like that but I don't find like I don't have the desire to watch Housewives anymore because it doesn't spark joy.

Is it irritating to watch it? Oh, you Marie Kondo'd your life. I just did. It doesn't spark joy. And when I have time to actually watch a show for myself, it has to be something that like, oh, this really just like puts me in the best mood ever. And those are period pieces.

Is it irritating to watch a show that you kind of put on the map? You were basically the one that put it on the map, right? Like I say that. No, no. And that's a very fair question. I thought it would be a lot harder than it was. And I wonder if that's because so much time had passed because like they skipped a year of filming and I'd already had Hartford.

So it's not like I was just locked in my house like I was during 2020, sober, pregnant, and like hysterical. Like, so it was like life was good already by the time, by the time Vanderpump Rules came out that like, I was just so happy to be a mom that I was like this and watching it I realized this is not my life anymore like I don't do these I don't go to these types of parties I don't have anything to do with the restaurants like watching you know my friends like do like a fashion show like at like at Airbnb in Palm Springs I'm, I can't picture myself in that situation, which made it like a lot easier to watch because I don't see how I would fit in.

Well, becoming a mother too, you realize how little other things matter. Very fucking accurate. Yeah. For me to go out to like even a dinner. Yeah. It's got to be like, it has to hit my checklist.

It really has to be good. It has to be the right people. It has to be has to be good it has to be the right people it has to be the right time it has to be the right environment otherwise like no i'm tired because you're spending time away from the baby yeah and even if let's just say for the sake of of the argument it's at night when the baby's sleeping well that's also my alone time so and I and I need that so like do I want to sacrifice my alone time to go to a dinner or a party or something like I you have to just truly weigh both options because I truly value my alone time I can imagine too with reality television too you're like is this worth it to go and film all this stuff when I could be at home making money in a different way? Yeah. I mean, you know, like, it's just...

Like, I was asking, at this point in your career, I was saying, like, is there even, and maybe you'll go back, but like, is there, like, what would it take to have you go back to television? Like, would you even want to, or do you even need it anymore? I mean, I think about it often because so many people have asked me like in my private in my private life, like everyone asks me like I've had producers ask me, I've been asked a lot and I've had these conversations. And I'm like, and and I think I've struggled with the fact that my answer is I kind of like an I don't know, but I'm allowed to still be figuring out i i love my life so much right now that and i know how reality tv disrupts your life and it puts you in situations that you would normally not be in and it and you kind of get put in this category this lifestyle that maybe you you don't want. But at the same time, I really enjoyed doing reality TV and it was fun.

And I don't know. All I know is that I wouldn't go back to reality TV unless I was an executive producer. I was just going to say, to have someone else control your narrative. Yeah, I can't do that. Michael and I said this today.

We were taking a walk. There was such an opportunity, in my opinion, this is my opinion, for the show to showcase you and Jax and whatever's journey through everything that you guys were navigating. And I think it would have helped other people. And it maybe also would have educated other people in the process. And the opportunity was just stripped away with no conversation. I actually don't think it was thought out. Like now that we're here in 2022 and I'm hearing about Vanderpump Valley and this and that, I'm like, was that really thought out or was it just an emotional reaction by the producers?

That was clearly not thought out because my... And I think we all know. I think it's very obvious now, but my producers didn't even know. So this was from a higher, whether it was Bravo or NBC Universal, the production company that I worked for and my producers, they had no idea. So that was like a really sad thing. And it was obviously like a very quick decision, but I also understood. And like, I don't have any animosity towards whomever Bravo or NBC Universal is because I do understand like having to protect what you've built.

And so if I'm going to in any way, like hurt something that somebody's built, then it's like, get me out of there. So like, I respect that side of it also. I just think it was honestly, it was a rash decision. And I think whenever people make rash decisions, it typically doesn't go the right way. That's true.

Right. Especially in business. It's like, I'm just trying. And I remember when that first happened, you know, because it was on like the clips they were pulling was from Jackie's show. Yeah. And so I remember I was like, I was enjoying an orange juice. I was in San Ysidro Ranch.

I was trying to relax. And I, everyone started messaging me all this stuff. And I was like, what the fuck? Are you really making this about you? Of course. You were enjoying an orange juice. I mean, he's painting a picture for me. I was trying to understand what happened because people were messaging.

They're like this thing that happened years ago that was talked about years ago on a show is now and we have to make and we have to change our whole business and i was like what the fuck are you talking about i was like no we're not doing any of that i'm like we're not doing any of that but i think it was just time everyone was so fucking hypercharged nobody was thinking right yeah no but i think that also at the same time i mean i look at back at it now and i'm like this was actually a gift like when you're on a reality show for so long like i was on one for my adult life most of my adult life and when you're on a reality show for so long they're making you're on a path that you have no control over. And by being fired and released from that situation,

as hard as it was, and even though I miss it sometimes, I now, I can do whatever I want to do. There is no one guiding me. There's no one telling me that I have to be friends with certain people, go to these certain places, talk about these certain things. I can do whatever

the fuck I want. And there's just so much satisfaction and joy in that. I personally think this is one of the best ideas I've ever heard, and that is better help. To be able to go online when you're feeling burnt out and have online therapy reminds you to prioritize yourself. If you've been listening to the show for a while, you've heard that we've been talking so much about the importance of talking to someone, about actually sharing your thoughts, getting them out with someone else so that they can bounce off somebody that has a perspective that's different than your own,

so that you can work on your own mental health and get to a place where you're not just stuck with your own problems and you can actually work through them with a professional. I did therapy a lot when I was younger and I found it to be very overwhelming. The whole process of getting in the car, going there, you run into someone you know in the office, there's the sign in clipboard, you got to wait in the waiting room, you go in, it's a whole thing. And to be able to just have access to it online, to talk about whatever you want, any kind of struggle or stress is absolutely incredible. I would highly recommend checking out BetterHelp if you're looking into therapy and you should know this is very affordable. So if you're having symptoms of lack of motivation, you're feeling helpless, trapped, detachment, fatigue, whatever it is, BetterHelp can help. BetterHelp is a customized online therapy that offers video, phone, and even live chat sessions with your therapist.

So you don't have to see anyone on camera if you don't want to. Like I said, it's much more affordable than in-person therapy and you can be matched with a therapist in under 48 hours. So it's quick and efficient. This podcast is sponsored by BetterHelp and the Skinny Confidential, him and her podcast listeners get 10% off their first month at betterhelp.com slash skinny. That's B-E-T-T-E-R-H-E-L-P.com slash skinny. People get so, I guess they get irritated with me when I say this kind of stuff but I don't believe in cancel culture in the sense that like you can't really cancel somebody right you can

like scream you can make it really really hard for them no but sure you can scream and yell and whine and you can get brands to stop working with them and you get a segment of the world to yell but like what I always tell people is what a horrible waste of energy though I know but listen what I keep trying to tell people and even on this thing that's going on with Twitter, I'm like, you can't cancel attention, right? Like if people are paying attention, they're paying attention. You can be mad that people are paying attention. But in your case, clearly people are still paying attention.

And so I always find this whole like cancel culture thing. You're canceled. You're canceled. As long as people are still paying attention and they care about what you have to say, you are uncancelable. It whole like cancel culture thing. You're canceled. You're canceled. It's like, as long as people are still paying attention and they care about what you have to say, you are uncancelable. It is not a real thing. The only way you are truly canceled

if people stop paying attention. That's like with this show, if people get mad at me or Lauren, all the shit we say, I'm like, the numbers keep going up. Yeah. Yeah. Sorry.

It's true. I know. It's a cancel culture. It's a weird, it just feels like a medieval thing to me where it's like, we think that we've grown past this point in humanity where we've evolved and we're not beheading people and stoning them to death. But we're at this other weird, dark place. People like the spectacle. Where they want to see you literally lose everything you it's they want to see you literally lose everything

you have and they want to see you homeless like they want that like i feel like that was that was what people wanted they wanted to see stassi lost her house stassi's husband divorced her stassi had nothing left like and then they'd be like okay fine then she's canceled but if they see a return if they see a book come out two years later, they're like, see, cancel culture really isn't a thing. It's not a thing. So the trolls feel like what happened. They want to see you destitute.

Yes. It's just a bizarre, weird world that we're living in right now. Always like people. Yeah. They like people. You say like people, they root, root root root for you until you've surpassed no no no there's a fine line

between someone who is a huge fan and obsessed with you and someone who fucking hates you there's a very fine line and if you take that obsessed person

and it crosses that line it's the most vicious kind the ones that liked you first yeah this is what i've seen from groupthink in my own like in my own scientific what is groupthink oh my god do you have an hour what is groupthink is basically like what happened to you okay i didn't know that that was a new

well at a high level i think groupthink is when you find yourself talking about, thinking about, and doing things that you wouldn't ordinarily do on your own because the group is doing it. Okay. Right? And so it's like constantly going with the status quo. Yes. So a giant group of people, all of a sudden, they'd probably, you know, like let's just take you for example. People like you, they're a fan of you, but they're not like thinking about you all day long maybe there's some people are but like the high majority i mean i don't really like think anyone's thinking about me but all of a sudden my daughter isn't even thinking about me

all day long but all of a sudden the group is thinking about you so now everybody's thinking about you everybody's aligning and it's like they wouldn't normally spend their days doing that but because everybody else has told them it's important, they jump on. Yes. Like Facebook groups. Totally. Facebook groups are so scary unless you find like a good safe one. I have a good safe one. You do? I wrote about it in this book. It was my podcast Facebook group and they're so nice there. Everybody's so nice. It's a safe space for me to go and like connect with my like original listeners. And I never feel like truly exposed, except for when I was when I was canceled and all that went down.

I was too scared to go and say something because you never know who's in there just lurking and screenshotting. And then they're just going to go post it on other things. But I bet you also didn't have the capacity. No, that too. I mean, it wasn't the best of times. I mean, it wasn't the best of times, but I don't want to paint this as like, poor me, you know, like I'm a victim

and this like really sucked because I did the things that got me to what happened. Like I can only like account for myself and I did those things. Now I'm not the one who can judge if the punishment fit the crime. Who's the one to judge that? Who's the one to judge that?

I mean, I will say that I don't think, I think it was out of control. I think it's gossip by celebs. Is that an account? I think it's them. I mean, I just will put my opinion. I think it was out of control. I think anyone that thinks it's okay to completely tear someone's life apart on the internet

is an angry, bitter person. There are ways for people to have redemption and to be more graceful. And there's ways to handle things more graceful. When you were in the depths of this, were there anything that surprised you that was positive? Like, were there any people or groups or maybe even producers that you were just like, oh. Yeah. No, actually, you just sparked something when you said that. Yes.

Like, I found front. I never would have thought if you would have told me that like the producers and like the production people who work on Vanderpump Rules that like their job is to meddle with my life and make me look a little crazy. I would never have thought that they would be a group of people that I would have become so much closer with once it happened. Like they've now like they stepped up as friends and that has meant so much to me. Like that to me was shocking. They could have easily just been like, oh, well, you're done. Like you got fired from Vanderpump Rules. So it's like you're you're done. But instead, they became friends and checked in on me more than most people and that has just been like well that's lovely because i loved you guys so much and it makes me feel so great to know

that you know they felt the same also low seems pretty ride or die she's in low is i wouldn't have been able to do yeah low seems pretty 99.8 of anything that I have done or built in the last two years if I didn't have low. Like we're constantly trying to be. I'm like, you're not my assistant. What can we call you? I hate the word assistant. It sounds douchey. A moat.

She's a moat. That just is not cute sounding. But like you're a moat. Like you're the alligators that are around like keeping people out of her energy. That is a bit period PC of you of her energy that is a bit period pc of you i know that is a period i knew you were gonna say that that is period i'm down with that i mean right now we ridgerton we've settled on like co low like coo because she does so much no because i mean people could have quit and like you really it seems like you really stepped into your role i think that's cool

yeah well okay so in the book the one of the most disturbing things that i read was when you talk about and i don't know if it's because we have similar jobs in some ways but you talk about the trajectory of the canceling like you say you say first it was the and I might be saying this wrong But first it was the podcast sponsors Then it was then it was like the big overall brands then it was the canceling of the show Can you talk about that trajectory and what that looked like for people that are unfamiliar? Yeah, well, I mean I get into it like in detail in my book but basically I describe it as like

Instead of like the universe was like created in a week, it was like destruction. It was like the opposite. Cause this was based really over the course of a week. And of course the first day I lost sponsors, but like, I I've been through this before. I'm like, I expected that. I understand like that, like didn't break my spirit. I was like, I get it. I 100% get it. What really started this chain reaction was that my PR publicly dropped me, which doesn't ever happen, really. That's not something that they're supposed to be the last one standing with you. And if they do drop you or decide to part ways, it's literally the opposite of their job to promote that

and to make that information public. And so that was so shocking. It was like a save their own ass type thing. Truly. And like that was really shocking in the industry at that time. So then Variety and Deadline and like, you know,

credible good news outlets were writing a story on it that, well, her PR dropped her. Like, what the holy shit? And then because of that, my agents then get a call from Variety and they get a call from Deadline and they're like, where do you stand on this? Are you still keeping her? And so there was, I guess, like a full eight hour day of a bunch of men or I don't know, in a boardroom that my agents weren't included in deciding whether to drop me or not. And my agents called me later on that day. And I'll never forget it because I was like all rosacea and like psoriasis out, no makeup, pregnant, just like dealing with the fact that my PR dropped me.

And and I was like, she called and she FaceTimes me and she's like how are you doing and i was like honestly i'm fine because like i know that i have you guys oh and she started crying and i was like why are you why are you crying right now and she's like because the variety is about to release an article and the board had to make a decision and we all fought for you so like hard when we heard this was happening but we weren't allowed to make that decision and so UTA is having to let you go and I was low was over and I like came up like sobbing like threw myself in like Bo's arms and I was like well I'm sorry you have to like I need I need to I need to I need to fall apart right here like I need to fall apart and again I I'm scared of

coming off sounding like a victim because like the that's not the point of this book and I feel so much stronger now but it was a very very very fucking hard day to then be like, OK, so my whole team is wiped out. I don't even know who to call for. Like, how do I get like one of my contracts? Like, how do I know if I got paid for this? Like, how do I know who can I contact right now? Like, I don't know what to do. And then after that, it was Bravo who then fired me and Kristen and some other people from Maripump Rules. I woke up to that information. And then the following day, my podcast was just taken off the podcast app. And I'm like, what the fuck?

How does that happen, by the way? How are they able to do that legally? Well, so they end up giving them back to me like the episodes. Cause I own the episodes, but I don't know how they were able to just like wipe it from the podcast app. And at that point I did not give a fuck. Cause I was spiraling. Who's they? Um, Apple.

The, the, but like, yeah, yeah. So you were on a network and the network did that to you? Yes. Seems like a little bit of a shady network. I mean, they were all, everything was just like crumbling one by one. And then the day after that, my venues, like my touring venues started to be like, well, obviously we can't have this person. So we're canceling her tour. And then after that, my like last like shred of of of hope was I had sold Next Level Basic, my first book to Sony to be made into an animated series. And I was like, I had thought like, this is it.

Like, this is what I'm destined for. I want to be in a writer's room. I want to create something like I'm going to be able to like quit Vanderpump Rules and like truly just like work on cool shit. And that then, obviously, that was the last one to fall. And so that was my week. That was funsies. Who doesn't want a free app that shows you doctors who are patient-reviewed, that takes your insurance and are available when you need them. I know that I do. Let me tell you, Zaza hit her head and we were scrambling around before we discovered this app and it was a nightmare. And now with ZocDoc.com,

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Who do you even call for advice? Do you call your mom? Do you like just talk to your husband? Like what do you even do? It was a lot of talking to Beau, talking to Lo, talking to friends. But also I'm not really like an advice seeker because I've i've realized especially over the last two years everyone wanted to give me advice everyone was calling me wanting to give

me advice everyone was saying something different everyone thinks they know what you're supposed to do you know a lot of people are like carry on just like you normally would keep putting podcasts out there you can do it and i'm like i know i can do it. And I'm like, I know I can do it, but like, that doesn't feel like the move. Like sometimes I, and I talk about this all the time on this podcast, the most strategic thing to do is nothing.

And that's really, that's what my hardest, that is what my intuition was telling me. My gut was telling me, I'm like, I'm pregnant. This major thing just happened to me. I need to,

to also educate myself a little more, understand what's going on a little more, and just take a time out. Take a really long time out and figure it out. I know that in our industry, it's like you constantly feel like you need to be working, doing something else, creating something else else but the best thing that i did for myself was literally nothing that's really hard though like you just said for people to understand because we're so our whole like sort of world right now is based on presence but i find that absence is just as important and i think that that conversation needs to be had more like whether you need a weekend off of Instagram stories or maybe you need a week or whatever. Like even with maternity leave, this one, it's like being absent is OK. It is a hard thing to

to digest, though, because I mean, I will say, of course, I worried all the time like life's just passing me by. Like I'm not on social media. Like I'm not anywhere. No one's hearing from me. I'm just going to be forgotten. Like I'm so used to constantly thinking that I have to come up with the next thing. I have to like keep working, keep moving. And to just not be out there, I was totally afraid that I would just be forgotten. But look what happened from nothing. You have have this you come out with this book you're able to go on a book tour like you're you're you're owning the narrative of your life so it it really did serve you it's just so crazy i think also even this is so weird but when you're dating

someone absence is just as important as presence and like if you can't understand that yeah sometimes just doing nothing is like people it's it makes mystery yes it definitely does underrated 100 underrated so now that's my goal lauren is i just want to like i just want to do nothing for like 25 years and then come back no that's how i got you mystery i walked away for like 12 years and left you to think about it she did nothing about you every day for 12 years i just did nothing straight i just sat i just sat out by my window it's easy to do nothing it's not easy and it's easy so now that you're here and you have this book what has you said you feel liberated how has that been like everything's in this book if someone asks

you any questions you can be like go read off with my head yeah it's just like a feeling of i hate to say like i don't care but i'm like if somebody comes at me i don't care if so if there's a negative headline i don't care like you guys i have put every there is no better job i could have done on this book and there is nothing I could have done better over the last two years than the path I decided to choose that I stand by every decision I made and everything I've I've written and every moment of silence like I stand by all of it I could not have done I I don't look back and be like, I wish I would have done this. I think I did everything right by my intuition and my soul. So it just feels like, come for me, please come for me. Like I've been there. Also, it seems like your community has really rallied around you. Yeah, that I didn't expect. I mean, I obviously like expected,

you know, some of my, my followers, like my Khaleesi's as I used to call them like when I had my podcast, like I expected that, but I've been really overwhelmed by just the level of support.

It's been like, it's been very nice, like really nice. People love a redemption story more than I think a teardown story too. I think people forget that like that's why you all like all the movies you watch yeah it's like the redemption people would try and tell me that during the last two years like people love a comeback i'm like easy to tell me when you're not in that situation like but do

they love a comeback that much i mean at this point i feel i feel comfortable i feel like enough people like a comeback well let's be honest. I mean, like, and I met, okay, so now back to the orange juice. I remember when that happened. I remember thinking, because Lauren had just had a baby. And I remember the fragile state that she was in towards then. I was like. Fragile is an understatement.

No, but I mean, like, I think this is for all women that are going through childbirth and being pregnant. It's like, this all happened while you were pregnant. Right. And I remember thinking like that's so fucking heavy. Well, I think the worst part of it and like it, the worst part when I talk about the seven days was that on the last day I found out my, I woke up to messages saying that my pregnancy was leaked and I wasn't even 10 weeks yet and so that was when i like but how did we know we knew somehow we knew maybe one of my friends somebody told you or something like that that's fine but like that was that was the hardest part because you don't know

if i hadn't even gone to like you know i mean like you don't know if you're gonna that's what i'm saying you were 10 weeks pregnant. I didn't know that. But we knew she was pregnant. I remember because I remember thinking that being like, oh, that's really intense. 10 weeks. I knew you were pregnant at 10 weeks. So early to have that leaked.

Yes. And the hardest part, though, also is just that people thought that I was leaking it to spin the narrative. Oh, my God. And I I'm like I can't say and I couldn't say anything to get sympathy to get sympathy and I couldn't say anything because if I commented on that then I need to be commenting on everything else and so I just felt like I don't I can't have a voice right now and I just have to let people think that I just went to Us Weekly for a pregnancy announcement. Like it was that was that was rough because I like so desperately wanted to just like

shout from the rooftops that like this was taken from me. And and now that it's taken, you think that it's something that I've done on top of that? Like you think that I I mean, I had people like DMing me being like, she just got pregnant just now in order to make herself look sympathetic. And I'm like, I've been I've been pregnant for for 10 weeks. Like, you can't just get pregnant. Whoever leaked that is that's dark. Yes, that's fucked.

Whoever did that, like that person should really really take a long hard look in the mirror well the reason i thought about is to your point i'm like that's so early in the pregnancy where they're still you know you're gonna be careful right and like then you're going through probably one of the more you know tough times of your life and you're probably managed thinking like oh i got this new kid coming in the world never had one before losing sponsors losing jobs, losing podcasts. How am I going to like all of these? I just bought a house.

Beau agreed like right before COVID that he would, you know, stop casting for a while and come with me on tour. And like we would just focus on my career as a couple and be together. And it was literally like, is this is this for real? Like, is this for real? Is this for real? How are we going to support ourselves? What are we going to do? He just gave up so much to be working on my dreams. And then my dreams just got crushed. So it was a really challenging time to try and figure out like, all right, let's start over. Let's figure out how to be resourceful, like how to build something else, like how to just pivot and without compromising our relationship and just completely falling apart as a couple, like during a pandemic. So like, no big deal.

I'm a queen. The reason I'm saying this stuff and maybe coming off more sympathetic was for an assortment of reasons, but I think we lose more as a culture and a society by coming at people from this place of hate. Like nobody benefits from this, right? Like you may tear down someone instantly and feel a little bit of instant gratification from hurting somebody else, but like everybody else loses because you just get to a worse place right right that's kind of why you see the state of the world and the way it is like everyone's just attacking attacking attacking right no it's like terrifying yeah there's no place to educate or teach future generations from a place of empathy or love it's just like constantly let me show you an example of how to

ruin someone's life yeah if i was you i would have put my phone on airplane mode or turned it off is that what you did i would just turn it off. Quite a few times. I wouldn't want to look at anything. I mean, I never went on social media. I went on Pinterest. Oh, you write about that in the book. You said you went on Pinterest a lot.

And I would literally look at like holiday decorations and baking. Like that was it. That was my only safe space for social media. So yeah. And Bridgington. How do you say it? Bridgerton. Bridgerton bridgerton so bridgerton is actually like a really bright light in your life because that was probably something that

you turned to as a peer and outlander outlander too i write about this like i literally just decided to zone out do nothing focus on what makes me feel happy and healthy and i just watched outlander for like a whole summer long and bought halloween and christmas decorations seven months prior to the actual holidays i begged 24 7 put christmas music on all year long oh no yes that was a major thing i learned how to make a fucking yule log and i was great at it like i mean i just did nothing so yes bridgerton was a bright light when did you decide to do the good the bad and the baby like how did that baby baby the good the bad the baby that's that is our podcast on patreon yeah yeah good bo's handle but here he's not wrong the good the bad

the bogey is bo's instagram yeah that, that's his Instagram. Get it right. Yeah. Okay. So when did you, when did that idea sort of conceptualize like how has that been going? It's your own narrative. You control it, which is amazing. Well, it's funny how it started

because it was like, I am somebody who's my self-esteem has always been tied up in like how much I'm working. Like if I'm busy and working and accomplishing

and doing and getting like, then I feel good about myself. So then when I wasn't given the opportunity to work, I, my, obviously my, I, how I felt about myself was like truly crumbling. So I'm like, I had many conversations with low with Bo and I was like, Bo, I'm going to be Kris Jenner and I'm just going to create a podcast for you that I'm going to run. And I'm going to I'm coming up with all these ideas about what you could do, what you could do, what you could do. And we just started building this thing for poor Bo for for for Bo. And then finally, and this was like only like a couple of months after everything went down, when I finally just went stir crazy, like not accomplishing or working on anything besides, you know, funfetti cupcakes. And then after like

months of like, you know, trying to create something for with him for him where he would be like the the talent. I'm like, who the fuck am I kidding? Like, I love to podcast. I miss this. Like, this is what, like, I love having conversations. Like, sorry, Bo, but we are a team. And that's when we just decided to do that. And Patreon,

it felt like a safe place to where if you want to listen to it, you have to pay for it. So it's not like an easy place for trolls to access. No one wants to pay me. Trolls don't want to put anything in my pocket or do they are they the ones that are they the ones that are doing half i don't know you know you never know but i find line i felt safe i always make the trolls pay me i'm just kidding i don't know they're gonna be mad wait so so when someone

goes on to listen to you guys what can they expect to get here that's different? Well, it's basically like an audio reality show. It's just talking about our lives, our experiences. I'm so used to living my life out there and having people see what my life is like that I'm like, why don't we just talk about it? Like every week, like what the theme of our week was, what issues we're having or what parenting issues we're having. Or I don't we just talk about it? Like every week, like what the theme of our week was, what issues we're having or what parenting issues we're having, or I don't know, this was actually a really slow week.

So let me just talk about Kim Kardashian right now because this went down. It's my way of just communicating to the people I lost communication with. Two things that I will never shut the fuck up about, okay? Peak Teas Sun Goddess Matcha. It's the best matcha ever. I don't have any other matcha, none, zip zero. After I've learned what goes into matcha, I'm going to tell you about that in a second. And their ginger digestion elixir. I have their ginger tea every single day. I have it iced. I put it in my water. I have it hot. I wind down with it. It's

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that is peaklife.com slash skinny with code skinny this discount applied site. Get the matcha and get the ginger tea. Now that you're like, I feel like you've put parameters and boundaries around everything that you're consuming, it sounds like. Do you read any of these gossip articles? Like you see Lisa Vanderpump just came out and says that you make amazing reality TV. She just said that in an article.

She goes, Stassi is amazing reality TV. Are you consuming that? Or do you not even let it enter your ether? Are you just overhearing about it? Well, I didn't know that. That's nice of her to say. I go through phases. Are you and Lisa on good terms?

Yeah. Like every time I've run into her and seen her, it's like been a very lovely conversation. And everything that I see that she's been putting out there are things like that because you guys are pretty close you know i mean as as close as a boss can be with you know someone like it we don't ever we've never been like calling each other and texting each other that's like never been our dynamic anyway it's more of just a if i run into her it's a it's a nice experience

and i enjoy running into her but that's pretty much it okay well that's that's something yeah so you look at it or you don't look at it or you both it's both because and then i go through phases of do i feel like being masochistic and torturing myself right now or Or did I learn better? It truly like every week is different. Like I can't say that I lean one way or the other. I do know when to not read like the full article. Like I sometimes I'm curious just to see like what a headline, what the headlines are because I need to know, am I being canceled all over again?

Like, is that going to happen? Like I have to like be somewhat aware of what people are saying because look what happened before. You almost have like post-traumatic stress. Lo says that. And there are things that have happened that like have majorly triggered it. Like someone had leaked on Google. Like literally when you Googled my name, it said off with my head that I

was putting out a book and the blurb was horrible. Like I would never approve or allow this blurb to be out there. And I have planned this book release, the timing, everything. I've taken it so seriously that it was, I was devastated in October when it like got out there on the internet and we had all of these, like these last minute, these zoom meetings, these nine one, one zoom meetings that I just, I sobbed through them, yelled at my publishers, slammed my computer. Like I was this hormonal psychopath, like, and I was like, that I think was like your first taste of like PTSD of being like oh my god things around me are this is reminding me of when something was taken from me again and again when I was canceled I did those things that people were mad at me for so like to say

something was taken from me I don't know if that's that, like whatever. But this reminded me that experience, like the thought that people could just come out and make the narrative about my life, whatever it was. Like, I don't know if I'm explaining myself properly. I don't think anyone's debating that you had maybe done something that you weren't so proud of or that might've been considered wrong. I don't think anyone's debating that. I think the question is, does the punishment fit the crime? Yeah yeah and i'm not the one that and i can't be the

one to to answer that like and that had to come to peace with that and focus on the good that the canceling brought me yeah i think like to be clear like i think there's a place to hold people accountable as you make mistakes but i think what i disagree with the most and why i push against cancel culture if you call it that is because i don't think that this type of holding someone accountable is actually productive for future generations or even for the current generation no and i will tell you it makes it way harder to actually do the work to be better it makes because there was you're like why the fuck am i gonna do this like fuck Yeah. The first month after everything happened, I was angry.

Of course. Like I was angry. I was upset. I'm like, fuck this. I don't want, like I don't want to be a part of this. I don't want to learn. I don't want to,

I'm angry. Well, it's like if you ever seen, like you discipline a kid and you go in there and you're like, I'm going to take everything away from you. I'm just going to take, take, take, take. And you're going to go sit in the corner and everyone's going to,

and everyone in the classroom is going to be mean to you. Like that would be the worst way to teach a child something, right? Correct. Because they would just get resentful and hateful and angry and they would want to go completely against how you would want them to behave. Exactly. And so that is how I felt for a good few weeks or a month after everything happened.

And then I finally had to, on my own, get to the point where I was like, I actually really want to be better. This is actually important to me. own get to the point where I was like I actually really want to be better I I this is actually important to me I want to educate myself on this I want to learn why this was wrong and why how I could be better at certain things the canceling made it harder for me to get there because I was so resentful at first but you say in the book which I found so interesting is you said you were doing like a Friday Zoom learning about everything and having education around everything that went on. And you said you started to almost look forward to it.

Yes, because honestly, I think that's just because my teacher was so nice. She's just a really lovely woman that made me feel safe because I was so scared to start working with a diversity coach because I thought it was going to just be this somebody who was just judging me. And I what if I said the wrong thing? And what if I asked the wrong question? And May is her name. May started every session with being like, you are going to ask the wrong questions and you're going to say the wrong things. And you are going to continue to long after we have these classes and these lessons like you will always fuck up. And that just made me feel like that made me feel free just to like, okay, like I'm, I'm not let, like, I didn't let everybody

win. Like I'm sitting here and like, I am actually doing the work when people are saying they're doing the work by, by calling other people out on Twitter. Like they're standing up for what they believe in. So they think they're doing the work. No, no. Like I'm sitting here and I am doing the work and that felt like something that made me proud to like one day explain to my kid you know like you said your kid saved you 100 and what at what point in the pregnancy did you start to feel better and did you start to feel like oh my god I'm building a human I I'm going to have this new life, this new energy. I was telling someone the other day, I wasn't a baby person until I had a baby. And I realized the reason I wasn't a baby person is because I didn't get it. What it is, is when you have this new baby, it's pure, unaffected energy. And there's something about having that pureness that's so attractive

when you have that. And all of this stuff just seems to fall to the waistline. I feel like we're the wayside. Like you're just like you have like a pure energy in front of you can concentrate on something so positive. Yes. Well, that happened, I will say, early on in my pregnancy, like as much as I had my moments where I was devastated and depressed and sobbing and crying and having those low days, for the most part, I was so fucking excited about becoming a mom that I was very much able to remain a happy person. Like I was I a lot of people were checking in on me and just thinking that I was very much able to remain a happy person. Like I was, a lot of people were checking in on me and just thinking that I was like on the ledge about to jump.

And I'm like, I'm actually, I'm fine. Like I'm pregnant. What a fucking gift. And I'm in this house and I have this husband that is so fucking supportive. Life is actually good when you think about it. And that just, Harvard was it. I don't know that I would have been able to remain a stable, normal person if I hadn't

been pregnant. I know I would have been like Xanax, alcohol, whatever other pill you'll prescribe me. Like I would have, I say dark passenger, everyone in my life and just like really just been an unhealthy person. And it's like Hartford was supposed to be there for this to happen. Speaking to people checking in on you. It sounds like for your cast, it sounds like Katie's one of your true friends. Yes.

Yes. She is my baby. But for everybody else was people were, how did they respond to all of this? Because they're obviously a part of this. Yeah, I mean, everyone was pretty supportive. Like the cast members that I'm friends with were... Or they're like, oh shit, like kryptonite.

I don't know, I got to be careful here. I mean, no, no one was really like that. What does the name rhyme with? No one was like that. No, truly no one was like that because everyone was there for what like they witnessed they were apart lots of other people were a part of what went down like oh shit look what can happen but there was uh what's the word what's the word there were more people involved in in the incidents that i was fired for what's that word though there's a word like a culprit no like they's that word though? There's a word. Culprit? No.

They were conspiring. There's like a word. Accessory? Yeah, like there's accessories. There's accessories. I love accessories. Yeah, so and Kristen and I obviously we were not going to take people down with us. So we were like lucky you guys

those of you that didn't get called out for this. And so everyone was pretty kind because I think they were feeling lucky that they still had a job. I have so many questions to ask you from the audience that have nothing to do with this subject. And the first one that I'll ask, because I'm curious, is what your day-to-day is like now. Oh, it's very boring. That's okay. It's very boring.'s okay it's very boring that's okay that we want to hear that i feel like we saw you on banner pump rules you've transitioned into a

mother like you're running a business like what's your day like now okay so an average day i i i have the morning shift so i wake up with hartford at like 7 maybe 7 maybe 630. And we play and I check emails and put on fucking Tangled or Trolls and check some more emails. Then Bo wakes up and he makes her breakfast. Bo does the like feeding because I'm a horrible cook. So he does breakfast. Then one of us puts her down for a nap after playing some more and that's when we like do like podcast stuff work stuff whatever we need to do while she's napping and then she wakes up and we either like go have some fun and take her to the park or something throughout the afternoon and then come back and Bo makes dinner and we give her a bath. And after she goes down

for bed, we like go up to the kitchen and have like alone time to like eat dinner and drink wine and decide if we're going to watch a show together or separately. And that is pretty much my average day. It's kind of nice, though, to have the simplicity when your life has been so chaotic. Yes, it has been. And especially since like going on the book tour and like feeling like my old self again, it's I'm really liking the juxtaposition, you know, like I'm not committed to like one lifestyle just yet. I'm like, I feel like I'm leading like a double life. So it's either like really boring and mundane and simple, but lovely or like things like this now going on with this book where it's

like, there's a lot. That's how we are. Hey, why do you think I love Austin? I look like Schmeagle from Lord of the Rings. When I'm in Austin, I look so disgusting.

Not my like toenails aren't painted. My hair is not done. I had not washed my hair in two and a half weeks. That's like look disgusting and then i'll come to la and it's like going through a goddamn car wash you know what she said like my fucking rims like washed and like the pulled and poked and prodded and then it's like a whole like different life you know she said today she goes don't worry she goes nobody sees me in austin so i don't care i was like well i i see i don't care like i don't know like you married a gemini i love the juxtaposition of what you just said you have to have the recharge time to be on i talk about this a lot i've always talked about this a lot like while i might seem extroverted i am not whatsoever and i truly need a simple happy home life and and and alone time and just time with

my husband and my baby very often like not like oh I get this once or twice a week like I need it often in order to like feel healthy and emotionally well I totally agree with you. I'm going to read some of the audience's questions and you can answer them quick. Okay. I feel like you kind of already answered this, but you can say maybe, maybe. Would you ever be on reality TV again? I am wearing a ponytail. It is snatching my face. I love a ponytail. But the thing with the ponytail is you got to find the right extensions. And these ones are BFB hair. They have the widest range of product offerings. They have a shade that is ideal for you. I laid them out today in front of my hairstylist and she was flipping out. She could not believe how well they matched my color. I'm telling you guys their clip-in hair

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You guys want to take advantage of this, especially if you're a clip-in hair extension fan like me. That's Skinny15 for 15% off at checkout. Enjoy your new hair. Yes, if I was an executive producer, if I was in charge of what goes out, I've had a lot of time. Again, like I'm not, I've had a lot of time, again, like I've said,

I've had a lot of time to think about this. And I have a kid now. And I think if you would have asked me this, even when she was a newborn, I would have been like, yeah, I'll go back on Rihanna TV. Like Hartford just would, like this is what her life will be.

But now that she's a toddler, there is literally no way I would let someone who doesn't know me or her produce and edit her and put her out without me or bo's approval of what goes out i think that's a very rational we get it we get that so there's that. Vanderpump Valley. I mean, it's obviously like not, I write about it. So like that was a, would you ever consider that or you have to be an EP? Will I be

in charge? Well, okay. I like, hey, I'm all about that. Like I would, I would never do a reality show either unless I had EP. So I completely agree with you. Which Vanderpump Rules castmate would ruin the fun of the filming the most jacks honestly i knew you were gonna say that yeah yeah he was he was hard to work with

but also because he was just all over the place just but like unhinged can be fun you know what i mean it's entertaining but he would try and like cancel scenes and ruin them for other people like he'd be like no one wants to go to your party like literally no one trying to and it's like whoa whoa this is a scene that we're all scheduled to be in just because you don't want to go to he made working difficult taylor sometimes you remind me of jacks like and i mean that in a nice way but taylor oh my god i thought you were just saying that to me no no no no no no no taylor our producer behind me yeah he sometimes has pain in the butt he

are you self-awareness is a little bit off are you and kristin and katie still as good as friends as you used to be no i mean katie like i said is is my baby's godmother. Like I'm, she's one of my closest friends and I'm friends with Kristen, but it's not the same. My life is also, it's just, we're all going in different directions and our lives are so different. And I don't have time for to just like be a witch if we help. No, I think that also it's so important to acknowledge that

friendships go through different seasons totally 100 percent like this this high maintenance friendships that they're gonna be the same the whole fucking lord i could i'm writing a book on it i swear i can't please because this needs to be talked about more i think that come to my house low maintenance friends are the best and and i I just feel like your friends should match your level of what it is. Like if you're a good friend. So when somebody is like extra needy or like needs me to text them every day or hang out all the time, I'm like this. No, no, no.

I'm a low maintenance friend. I never call you. I never text you. Like if like that's what I need from you. It should be. Just be my friend but let's not talk the way I think about it

is it should be effortless and a real pleasure anytime you're connecting yes but I'm gonna tell I'm gonna do a public service announcement if I am with dinner I'm if I'm going to dinner with you

and we're sitting at dinner and you're planning the next dinner no I'm gonna off myself yes I can't I 100% we're at dinner right now

totally like I can't oh when they're doing like the advanced. No, I can't. Or like when we're having a drink and we're like, well, when should we do the next drink? Like I don't have the capacity to wash my hair. I haven't washed my hair in two and a half weeks. I you take on what you can take on.

Sometimes it takes me a month to text people back. I know. I know. Because I text you sometimes. But I know. But I know that like i've and i appreciate that about you because i'm the same way and i wish more people appreciated that about me i do what you can do and especially now that you have kids like like i just voiced it in my friend

today and i was like listen like i'm so uncomfortable right now like i i only can focus on like i know this sounds weird, work and growing a baby and taking care of a kid. Yes. It's enough. And like, I'll blow you once in a while. Like that's enough for me. Don't forget that.

Maybe put that at the top of the list. No one wants to have sex with me right now with these horrible smells. Maybe not true. Everyone, I just have to say this is saying how much they love you in these questions. So there's a lot of very, very, very nice.

Okay. This is going to come out after your wedding. So can we talk about your wedding? Yeah. I mean, I'll talk about it anyway. Talk about your wedding. Tell us all about your wedding. Well, it was what's in Rome.

The location that we have, well, it was supposed to be on Vanderpump Rules. That was, so it was going to be a filmedanderpump rules that was so it was going to be a film wedding yes that we could not get out of so like when we went to um to wedding to look at venues back in 2019 one of our producers came with us to rome and this was going to be like the bridge to like a valley rules kind of spin-off like where the og cast members would like kind of spinoff, like where the OG cast members would like kind of go off into their own show and Vanderpump Rules could stay like at the restaurant with new people. And so our wedding was going to be part of that bridge to these two shows. And so we had to have a producer come with us to scout locations because wherever we

picked to get married, hotel, rehearsal dinner had you have to get the rights to film there. So like I couldn't just go wedding plan myself with beau so we found our venue got locked in we found our rehearsal dinner venue got locked in found the hotel then everything went down where uh i was fired and we were still locked in so they wouldn't let us get out of these venues but did the show lock it in or did you you personally like we i did because i'm like we're like the venues wouldn't like bravo didn't pay for this shit like we paid for the shit and the venues didn't let us get out of it so beau and i had to make talk about this for what felt like 89 years and was like do we

want to just eat this money and and let it go or like do we want to reimagine what this wedding will look like and like still do it and i'm like let's fucking still do it and let's do back to back let's do my book this week and let's get married right after so it is just a great time let's just fucking go and live our best lives for a good month good for you and cut 70 of the guest list because it's too expensive so now it is a um 35 person wedding in rome like in a location that's meant for like a shit ton of people how many people from the cast are being invited i will say that only a few are coming so were you cutthroat about the list with the cast? Yeah. I mean, I love a cutthroat wedding.

We had 45 people. You, I actually, when I was doing the cutting, I remember when you did my podcast. 55. And you had told me that. We invited 55.

You said it was the best decision that you ever made. And I kept thinking back on that. And I was like, no, I can do this. And honestly, everyone's been pretty understanding

because we sent out an email being like, yo, times are tough. I i can't we can't have like a 200 person wedding so like this doesn't mean we don't like you but you're not part of my 35 top people well you know what like also like i mean i think i think about it two ways like a lot of people don't even want to like go to weddings right yeah i'm releasing you yeah i am releasing you of having to fly all the way to rome spend all this money like you're welcome for being uninvited and then for you and bo it's like you don't want to spend the whole time glad handing a bunch of people absolutely not we want to be able to like

sally's cousin that you haven't seen in 18 years here's here's when i made the decision to have a small wedding and you'll relate to this i did a book launch like when i first started blogging it was like three years in and in the book launch there was like 500 people and i remember at the end of it i couldn't even enjoy one second and not only that i couldn't remember one second because i was constantly being stimulated and i was constantly being thrown out feeling like you have to make sure everyone feels like it's exhausted yeah so that was like i want like i don't want to do this at my wedding like i want people to be so confident and comfortable with our relationship that i don't need to like it was just one big party for us for three days you'll love it well so that is what i'm hoping this is

35 people that like i love the most just fucking hanging out in rome that's how it kind of like should be right that's the plan and then the second week you guys are is it a honeymoon i mean is it a honeymoon when your baby's there? Can we call that a honeymoon? Can you stick it in in the bathroom in two minutes? I feel like we're really good at like timing when it comes to like when to do it. And honestly, that's on me because I don't tell him that like, I'm sorry, I can't have sex at night.

It's just like a thing. Like you're tired. I'm exhausted. I don't feel hot. I don't like none of that stuff. I also like like i want to have like a glass of wine at night like i don't want to worry about blowing yes and i like sober sex so like i plan certain days like he doesn't know that i'm planning it but like i know that like on this day and on this day during her nap, I will initiate this. Are you getting this, Lorna?

Are you getting tips here? I have a different strategy than that. I like the strategy. We all have our own. What's great about this is you can add additional strategies. My strategy is I always rally. Yeah, I know. I always rally.

Do you really? Always. I'll rally anytime. Wait, that is... I don't want Bo to hear this because Bo now knows not to even like kind of like initiate anymore because just let me initiate when i'm when i'm horny that is true and all the years i've known lauren i've never been denied maybe once i'm

trying to be like no but i am like a shuck maybe once you we've known each other also i'm not like a prick about it. Like if I'm like, okay, she's not, this is not, she's not into it right now. She's not in the moment. Then I won't do that. But like if. But I've also been married longer. And I think when you've been married longer, like you, like, yeah, like you rally.

Like you just, right now, like you're at a sweet spot where you can do that. Like your strategic like days. I think it's fine. Well, she got some advice. Oh, you guys. Did she get some advice? I'm horrible. Yeah.

My stepmom. I complained to her. i complained to her once when i was 21 i was bartending like so long and i was just working and working and i called her and i'm like oh he wants to have sex again i'm like i'm so tired like i just can't have sex at one in the morning and she goes i thought she was gonna be like oh it's okay like just do it when you want to do it. And she was like, no, you rally. And she's been married to my dad for like 50 years. Thank you, Julie. Love you, Julie. Oh, man.

I need to get my shit together. Just give him a blowjob. But I do these things on my time. Okay. I mean, you're always working. On my time. Don't tell him to listen to this episode. On my time.

Well, listen, not to make it sound like I'm a... But he could do it all the time. That's the thing. If I said twice a day he'd be like fuck yes I'm living my best life so like I just you gotta not be a dick about it right like you gotta be like okay like I could tell

like you know right now you know she's pregnant and she's tired and had a long day I'm not like hey rally you know like coming out of nowhere like I kind of read the room I did tell you the other day when I came in I was like i caught my vagina shaving because i can't see it and there was no you came in all dramatic you're like i cut i cut my clitoris out just a slice it was that area oh my gosh i can't see anything you guys what do you want me to do maybe a lot see like oh yeah i cut my clit we have to edit this no we're not cutting it out tilly i thought

i was gonna kill oh my gosh i thought i was gonna slip on it in the shower okay first of all it's healed it's not like he's imagining like a piece it's not a piece it's a slice you come in so dramatic on everything well there was i was bleeding if you said like hey i did a little cut my clit if you said i just nicked myself shaving that's different okay i nicked my clit can this episode be titled nicked my clit do not fucking cut this taylor i will off with my clit off with my clit that's what this is gonna be called tay Taylor do not cut this out of the episode okay so enough about my clit so the week after

that you're gonna be in Europe you're gonna have a half ass honeymoon Hartford with you and I was saying that like it's gonna be a little tough you're making me laugh it's gonna be a little hard you're gonna make it through but

i'm expecting it to be hard so like that's the thing you're scaring the shit out of me you'll be fine like no be fine no i can see in your eyes like you just have like this panic for me which is like so like i don't know like kind of you like to have such empathy for me right now but like i see it in your face it's just a lot of work it's a women like mothers and fathers together on a flight for 16 hours or however long it is it's a lot of work 13 right just bring a lot of toys a lot of food a lot of xanax a lot of a lot of wine and you'll be okay i'm so excited you guys this is gonna be the best trip ever i mean download shows i am well that is done okay i am not at a point where i feel comfortable being out of the country without her so like there was no other option we're the same than to have her stay and be with

us on this whatever honeymoon so i've already have it in my head. That's like, well, this was the only option. So it's not going to be as fun as what life used to be when we traveled. And we're just going to have to like, really like room service a lot of the times. And we're just going to just, I think that we've been also,

Beau and I have been down and like not in our normal life that we were used to, where like we were constantly working and traveling and having fun this past two years, we've been at home. Our lives drastically changed. We haven't, we felt like we were still in a cage. So we're just going to be so fucking happy to be in Europe, to be traveling that like if that means that like i'm just like eating scrambled eggs for dinner on like the bathroom floor at like one in the morning like we're gonna be so happy just to be there and doing it that like that's why i'm not worried i'll give you like one just one piece of advice because it sounds like you like paris a lot is

that where you're going paris yeah it was one of those places yes it sounds like you're familiar with it so i I would just, the only advice I would give is to not have the expectation that it's going to be like other times you've been there. But that's not a bad thing. It's just different

because we go back to these places that we love. Okay. We've scared her. And then I'm like, but you know, I know I'm not going to like on your avenue.

I know I'm not going to like the restaurants that I love. You can go to, you can go to the avenue. Is it lay or lot? I don't know. Okay. I don't know. It's like one L. Okay. Everyone I love. You can go to La Avenue. Is it Lay or La? I don't know. Okay, I don't know either. It's like one L.

Okay, everyone gets mad I mispronounce stuff. Okay, you can go there during like, go right after her nap at lunch. But you know where I would go on the date night when Lo's there? Oh, please give me Ferdie. What is that? Ferdie.

Ferdie. I'll see. Let's write that down. I'm telling you, that is the restaurant that I would go to if I had one restaurant to go to. Have you been to Hotel Costas? Yes. Yes,ay. I'll see. Let's write that down. I'm telling you, that is the restaurant that I would go to if I had one restaurant to go to. Have you been to Hotel Costas?

Yes. Yes, that's a good one. Do you like it better than that? I would go to Faraday for dinner and then I would go for drinks or before.

Faraday's behind cost. And I would make low stay till four in the morning. And Bo, does he eat meat? Sorry. Yes, he does. One of the best burgers I'll ever have.

Okay. Yeah. So great. So I'm just going to have one great night out in Paris with my husband. But that's like the, wouldn't you say to go there? Yeah, but no, but the only thing I'm saying is like, we went, the reason I'm telling you this is because we went back last year around this time and had the expectation that it's just to be like how every other time we went.

No, she has. She's not like that, though. She's she's really self-aware with it. Yeah. Well, I was like, I know I'm not going to be able to do like 98 percent of what I know. You should have seen what was in my brain because I'm so oblivious. I was like, oh, like, you know, why she naps. We're going to be like.

We were surprised every day that it wasn't going the way we thought. Like, we look at each other like we thought someone's punking us like every day we're like well why isn't this you guys were also still used to traveling and doing things and so you you you were used to that so then all of a sudden it's like wait my baby's a little different right now and this kind of sucks this vibe is not it also went during a weird time we've not gone anywhere so we're just so desperate to just like be with each other in another location. And there's no masks, right? No, I think it's done.

I think it's done. Amazing. So then you can go there without the mask situation. That was the other thing. We had to wear those the whole time. If I had to wear a mask throughout Europe, I don't think that we would have. I don't know. I mean, I just held my glass of wine in my hand the whole time.

With the straws. That's what everybody does. I'm drinking and eating peanuts, okay? Like, I don't know what to say. Okay, so to end this, what are some bright, happy things that are happening for you right now besides your book?

Your book's obviously amazing. I feel like everyone who's listening should buy it. So good. But what else? What can we expect from you? Okay. Well, I will say this. One thing I've learned over the last two years is to focus on one thing at a time and really put my all into that one thing and then move on to the next. And so in my brain, I've put everything I had into this book. And then now this wedding and the next step this summer, the focus is like, okay, let's restart my podcast. And so that's where I want

to go. And then eventually I can be like, now let's podcast tour again. Now, does somebody want to buy the rights to Off With My Head so I can produce that show? Because I have lots of ideas. So that's like my vision board is but i'm taking everything one step at a time i forgot you were doing those wild tours those were intense so much fun too i was like a rock i was like living like a rock star i was just like you know in a tour bus just living my best truly in a tour wait can you have sex in a tour bus yes what's up with you in the sex you can I just want to know if you can have sex in the bus. Is it moving? Like, that's a lot. Yes, because

we had the back room of the bus, so it was like me and Bo in the back. But it's a little bed, right? Yeah, but like, you make shit work. But do you have to feel like a tour bus driver? I would rally. Yeah. Yeah, it was fun. So, I will say something about podcasting. You were an OG

of podcasting before anyone, years before. I know. And I'm so scared that people will forget that. And it's just going to look like I'm just like another person coming out with a podcast. And I want to be like, I'm sorry. I was, I was here first. I remember you posted like that you had a podcast and I didn't even know how to access it. Yeah.

Like Brandy Glanville and you were the only ones that had podcasts. What was the motivation early on? Well, I was dating somebody who worked in radio who was like an asshole. But like I was so I was like around that environment and I became best friends with Taylor Strecker through him. So I was constantly around this and Taylor was like, you could do this. And I'm like, you could do this. And I'm like, I could never.

Like your brain has to go like a million miles an hour. Like, look at you. You have to fill up time. You have to fill up like the space. Like I could never do this. And then I was offered an opportunity to do it. And I was like, I might as well just try. Let's give it a whirl.

And then I loved it. So. Also, it's nice. It has nothing to do with the way you look. That's my favorite part about it. Well, which is unfortunate now because now everyone's filming their podcast so like we feel like we have to like keep up and it's like what just swear i thought i could do this podcast in my bathroom with like my psoriasis medicine on my face like what you can still do that though i don't think i mean like sometimes the video i agree it's like oh we got to do another thing work It's a lot of work. It's so much work. I actually won't go there. I'll tell you off air. All right. So where can everyone find you?

Pimp yourself out, your book, everything. God, I know. Oh my God. I don't even remember how to sell myself. I think I'm at Stassi Schroeder on Instagram. I don't really tweet that much every now and then, but I'm at Stassi that not selling that one but you can buy my book pretty much anywhere so just like google it or like go to your local store please support local bookstores because we don't want them to die so there's that you can also listen to the audiobook and also your and you can go on patreon i call it patron because i can't pronounce anything you guys i haven't sold i haven't had to do this in a long time. So I'm sorry that I'm rusty. You can also go and listen to my podcast that I have with my husband on Patreon. And that is

the good, the bad, the baby. And you get videos and just content. Content. I think this episode is so amazing because it gives another perspective to a side of a story that a lot of people wanted to judge with a clickbait article. That's why I think it's so amazing about podcasting is it gives context to things. No, no, they'll still pull the clickbait out of it. Oh, okay. Yeah, 100%.

I'm already in the back of my head being like, well, I said that I cut my clit off, so maybe it is what it is. Lauren Bossick has lost her clit. It's not cut off off it was nicked okay and you told me you nicked your ball sack so don't act like you're all i didn't say i said nick i don't come and say my fucking balls are gone right stassi i cannot wait to see what you are going to do and i i would love for you to have your podcast thank you just to let you know thank

you for coming on thanks for bringing her in wait. Wait, don't go. Do you want to win a signed copy of Stassi's book, Off With My Head, the definitive basic bitch handbook to surviving rock bottom? I read it. It's a great read. I think you guys will all love it. All you have to do is tell us your favorite part of this episode on my latest Instagram and Stassi will personally sign a book for you. We'll drop into one of your DMs. And with that, get excited for the next episode. It's a good one. I think you're going to love this duo. Taylor, it's a damn good thing that Symbiotica decided to partner with our show because I'm telling you what, I am their number one customer. I am taking all of our disposable income and I am dumping it into Symbiotica. I think I have all of their products. I think I am their best customer. I don't think

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