The Skinny Confidential Him & Her Podcast - World's Top Celebrity Stylist Maeve Reilly On How To Build A Career Doing What You Love, Sobriety, Recovery, Struggle, & Staying Hungry

Episode Date: July 8, 2021

#372: On today's episode we are joined by wardrobe stylist to the stars and entrepreneur Maeve Reilly. Maeve joins the show today to discuss how she was able turn her passions into a career. We also discuss her journey with sobriety and how she overcame bullying from a young age. We end the episode discussing how a positive outlook can change the trajectory of your life.  To connect with Lauryn Evarts click HERE To connect with Michael Bosstick click HERE Read More on The Skinny Confidential HERE For Detailed Show Notes visit TSCPODCAST.COM To Call the Him & Her Hotline call: 1-833-SKINNYS (754-6697) This episode is brought to you by The Skinny Confidential  The Hot Mess Ice Roller is here to help you contour, tighten, and de-puff your facial skin and It's paired alongside the Ice Queen Facial Oil which is packed with anti-oxidants that penetrates quickly to help hydrate, firm, and reduce the appearance of fine lines and wrinkles, leaving skin soft and supple. To check them out visit www.shopskinnyconfidential.com now.  This episode is brought to you by JuneShine JuneShine Hard Kombucha is the most insanely delicious, better-for-you alcohol. t’s made with real, organic ingredients and unlike other alcoholic beverages, they are transparent about every ingredient they put in their products. Best of all, it doesn’t leave you with that I’m-too-full-after-drinking feeling, but it does give you a lighter, brighter buzz. We’ve worked out an exclusive deal for Skinny Confidential podcast listeners. Receive 20% off PLUS Free Shipping on their bestselling variety pack. This is a great way to try all of their delicious flavors. Go to www.juneshine.com/skinny or use code SKINNY at checkout to claim this deal. This episode is brought to you by Rothy's Rothy's comfortable, washable and sustainable shoes and bags make getting dressed easy. Rothy's shoes are incredibly comfortable with zero break-in period thanks to their seemlessly knit-to-shape design. With many styles to choose from, Rothy's shoes are the perfect way to add some comfort and style to your closet. Check out all the amazing shoes, bags and masks available right now at www.rothys.com/skinny  Produced by Dear Media 

The following podcast is a Dear Media production. She's a lifestyle blogger extraordinaire. Fantastic. And he's a serial entrepreneur. A very smart cookie. And now Lauren Everts and Michael Bostic are bringing you along for the ride. Get ready for some major realness. Welcome to the Skinny Confidential, him and her.

And I just, you know, I banged down doors until people would hire me. And I just, I had this sort of like hustle mentality where I just would not take no for an answer. And, you know, really never gave up in those moments where you think like, I'm going to give up now. You know, like this is too hard to get through. And, you know, I think that's the difference. I think it's like the people who don't give up. Back in studio with Maeve Riley. She is sharing all the things, you guys. She is one of the top stylists in the world. She works with Hailey Bieber, Megan Fox, Ciara, the D'Amelio sisters,

Crazy, and Lala Anthony. And let me tell you, I saw her in person. She has some real great personal style. I mean, she shares all the tips in this episode, but we also talk about her journey with sobriety. She's been 16 years sober. We, of course, go into styling, all the things styling. She talks about how to be a celebrity stylist, entrepreneurship, and even gives us styling tips. So this episode is filled with all the gems. What I love about stories like this, because you'd think, okay, what's this guy doing here on a style episode? What I like is that, and what we've discovered over the years doing this show,

is that if you have a passion for something in this day and age, with technology, with the internet, with all the tools that we have at our disposal, you can really make a career out of anything that you're passionate about as long as you work hard, hustle, find that angle. And Maeve definitely does that, obviously, here working with some of the biggest names in entertainment. You can also tell throughout this episode, and I've read other interviews on her, that it's more about the clothes for her. She's very, very passionate about what she does. And I think she has a great message. You guys are going to love this episode. Everyone was freaking out over DMs when they saw her on Instagram story. So with that, let's meet Maeve Riley. She is the force behind her own clothing label,

The Local Love Club. She also, like I said, styled Hailey Bieber, Kiara, Megan Fox, and Lala Anthony. With that, let's welcome her to the Skinny Confidential Him and Her Show. This is the Skinny Confidential Him and Her Show. This is the Skinny Confidential Him and Her. Okay, you have to tell me you were talking about your hack for the phone. I'm feeling like I need to change my number. Can you tell us about this hack? Oh, I don't. It's not a hack. I just, listen, I have an amazing, amazing team. I have two incredible people who work for me. And so the interns report to them. I field so many people and so much energy all day long between clients, their publicists,

their managers, my assistants, brands asking for stuff. So the last thing I need is an intern asking me how to get to the Pacific Design Center. You know? That makes total sense. So you have people on your team who help build the interns up so you can be effective with your energy. Have to. Yeah, that's very smart.

Thank you. I got to take a tip. Do you not do that? No, I'm constantly on tech. I think I have 600 text messages right now. No. That's a very good tip. I have to protect my energy to be the best version of myself for my clients,

you know what I mean? And for the brand that I'm building or even just in my relationships with friends. It gets really overwhelming, and I'm really sensitive to energy. I always have wondered this, and this is such a random question, but how do you deal when you're working with such gnarly celebrities and there is an intern or an assistant that's oversteps? And I know you know exactly what I mean. I totally do. I have been really lucky, truthfully, to have amazing, amazing people who've worked for me over the years where I honestly don't have a ton of those stories. I have one nightmare assistant story that I like legally can't talk about. You know, yeah, you really learn as you grow businesses, curveballs

happen, you know, and unexpected lawsuits may happen. Like, you know, shit like you're just like, whoa, this is real grown-up stuff i i wasn't expecting it's on it's not all fun and games it's not it's not people have no idea and a lot of that stuff i've i've never talked about i'll write a book one day and i'll tell it i'll do a tell all of the things that have happened to me along the last 16 years i've been sued by you know it's like well it didn't actually nothing actually happened but, but they, you know. Almost. Almost. Well, I'm glad that it actually didn't go through. Me too. Knock on wood.

Knock on wood. I want to get a background on you. I know you've been interviewed probably so many times on what you do for a living, and we're going to get to that. But first, I want to go back to your childhood, how you got into this. Have you always been attracted to fabrics? You're obviously very stylish. Is this something that you just came out of the womb

being stylish? So I grew up in New York. I feel my mom had great taste. So did her sisters. And I definitely knew I wanted to be in fashion. I didn't know to what capacity. And when I started, you know, this was pre-Rachel Zoe. This was pre-Instagram. You know, there was no social media and styling was not known. You know, it was not what it is today. And it certainly wasn't, you know, to be considered an influencer today. None of this was happening at the time. But I went to FIT. I knew I wanted to be in fashion. I couldn't draw. I couldn't sew. But I had a lot of ideas. And I just I remember thinking if I could just tell someone exactly what I want, I could make the most amazing stuff, but I didn't. And then of course, that's essentially what a stylist is. You sound like me. If I could just tell someone everything that's in my brain

and have it made. Yeah. That's not, that's not how it works, right? You have to go back and forth and back and forth and back and forth. Yeah. But it is sort of like what a stylist is, you know, it's like, I have this idea and then I have the opportunity to go out into the world and grab stuff from everywhere and put my idea into, you know, into an outfit. So I went and I got a business degree. I went to FIT as a high school student. I went there every Saturday. And then in the summer, I took six weeks of courses like and I was a really problematic child. Like I was such a bad kid. But I what kind of courses like and i was a really problematic child like i was such a bad kid but i in what kind of way like uh oh i was at school or yeah acting out never went to school i've i've just recently like sort of broken my anonymity of 16 years of sobriety and so i got

sober when i was 17 and so pre-17 was pretty dark and wild sober Sober off. Drugs and alcohol. Yeah. Like how wild? Gnarly. Near death. Near death. Certainly near death. I would love for you to talk a little bit about that because my sisters come on the podcast and she had the exact same story as you. She got sober when she was 17 and it was a hair away from death.

Yeah. Is she still sober? She's still sober. God bless. Yay. Maybe I know her. Maybe you know her. Yeah. That's true. Yeah. I've never talked about it. I never talked about it until I'm launching this clothing line that we can talk about. And so much of the history of this

clothing line sort of came from this. So I felt like there was no way to be authentic and not share it. I think when I started in this industry, you know, people want to party and people want to like live their lives the way they want to live them. And I really didn't want them to feel like that they couldn't do what they wanted to do in front of me. I never wanted anyone to feel like they needed to adjust their behavior because they were afraid I was unable to handle it. I love my friends drinking. I've dated different dudes that drink, you know, like I have no, no issue with it whatsoever. But with clients, I kept it to myself for a long time because they're partying. And I just didn't want them to feel like they had to, like I said, adjust their behavior for me.

Or like feel uncomfortable around you as a client. Cause I have no judgment. Like I have no judgment what people do. It's just my story and it's my experience. And the only way that I know is, you know, 100% abstinence. And so I recently sort of outed myself in this Vogue article, which was cool. And I really hope that people, you know, learn something from my story. I think, you know, I was bullied. Like this is where I was bullied so bad as a kid from third grade all the way until my senior year of high school, essentially when I got sober. Why? I have no idea. Like I asked myself that often.

I have no idea. Just the target. Like bullied by, who were you bullied by? Mostly females. It was mostly girls. And then I think as I got older, even the boys got on board. So there was just like no safety whatsoever.

And how would that manifest itself? Was it like they would say things or like actually physically beat you up? Like my husband hates bullies. It was both. Well, good. Me too. I hate bullies. It was both. It was mostly verbal. And then as the internet started and it was like AIM and MySpace, it was the very early, early days of online bullying. And so I would deal with it all day at school. And then I would come home, turn the computer on and it was just relentless. And it was, was it because of like the way you looked or because of someone you were dating or because of the way, like, was it older? Like, I don't know. I really, I, you know, and, and the amount of, you know, work I've done around this and so much of recovery is owning your part in things and not being a victim and not saying like, I was the victim. I don't know why I have looked at this so many times. And truthfully, I have no idea. I don't think I had a part in it. I think it was just, you know, they just chose me and it just was my cross to bear at that time in

my life. And, but it's interesting because so much of, I think what happens in that age really dictates the woman that you become man to, I'm sure, but it was bad. I think so much of our childhood dictates how we got and you know what's funny is like I'm somebody that I have difficulty looking into the past I'm like a very my cross of errors I look too far in the future right like that's the idea is like we all could get to a place where like living in the presence yeah some people look too far in the past some people look too far in the future I fall on the ladder but I'm all sweating I'm telling my story and I'm fucking because I don't look so far in the future. I fall on the ladder. I'm all sweating. I'm telling my story and I'm fucking taking my shirt off. Well, because I don't look so far in the past, like over the years, talking to people like

yourself and doing so many of these, I'm like, oh, you really do have to go back and analyze your childhood and your thoughts from childhood and to really kind of understand the person you are now. I think it's really important for people to do. I totally agree. Without dwelling. Without dwelling, but understanding that we are a product of our parents, A, and our environment. And in order to grow, I think you need to confront it and heal it to be able to move forward. I share about the bullying because I was in so much pain and I felt

like I had nowhere to go. I really didn't have anywhere to go. I turned to drugs and alcohol. So that was sort of my story. And thankfully, my family were incredibly overprotective and on top of it and, you know, put me in treatment when I was 17. It's totally saved my life. I do. When you say you had nowhere to go, you didn't feel like you could go to your parents or your siblings? Yes and no. I think that I put on this persona of like, I can handle it like tough girl. I definitely turned into like the angry, angsty teen that at some point learned to fight back and physically would do so. And my parents wanted to let me just be clear. They wanted to take me out of that school. And I was like, I can handle it. I can, you know, just as a kid, there's,

I don't know if it's ego or if it's like the need to prove that you're okay. But like, I really wasn't okay. You know, in retrospect, I really wish they had removed me. I know moving forward, if I saw that happening to my child, you know, it sounds like it got, it sounds like this is pretty serious bullying. It doesn't sound like, Hey, you got like picked on a little bit. It's not like if you're getting into physical fights and your parents are thinking about

removing you and now retrospectively, like, have done. What are they bullying you for? Like what they're saying like you like. I don't know. I don't remember. I don't care. It doesn't matter. I'm going to guess

that the reason they were bullying you is because you're so beautiful. I think I got cuter later truthfully. I don't think it was that. I bet you that was it. My mom would agree with you

but I don't think that's true. I mean the way you look I can see like maybe you being a target. I appreciate that but I don't think I's true I mean like the way you look I can see like maybe you being a target I appreciate that but I don't think I was always cute I would love to know if there was what a time that you tried drugs and alcohol where you had an epiphany where you're like oh my god this I I love this this makes me feel so much better or was it just like a slow build of addiction no it was definitely from the jump I was like oh this is for me right away right away like this is gonna be I you know again like tough girl like I started from the jump. I was like, oh, this is for me. Right away. Right away. Like this is going to be, you know, again, like tough girl.

Like I started getting tattooed when I was 14, 15 years old. You know, like just anything to sort of be like the rebellious. I wore it like a badge of honor. Like I was the tough girl. And it took me so many years, you know, to unravel that. And like you're saying, like looking back, I had to address it to be able to heal it and not be that person anymore. I think, you know, my relationship with women was so it was so hard from that, you know, to trust women. And so I separated myself, you know,

I just constantly in my adult life, push people away. And that is no way to live. So when you went into recovery, what was so amazing about it? Was it like you just went and you felt like you were around like-minded people that were trying to get sober? Was it something that you were out of the bullying? What was something where you were like, oh, now I'm going to get sober? What was that decision like? Well, the decision wasn't mine. As I said, my family put me in a treatment center and I was underage and had no like it was either be here or be homeless. Essentially, they, you know, put a boundary and said this is so something shifted for me in the course of that time where I

realized that whatever was going on in the recovery world was definitely better than what I had going on. And I it just hit me like this is I got to try this, you know, because what I've got going is not good. And it's very dark. I don't want to live like this anymore. So I became willing, I guess, to change my life. If there is someone listening that has a sibling, a brother, a sister, a kid that is using that is it's a problem. What do you recommend? You know what that sounds like, Michael?

I don't know if that sounds what you think it sounds like. It's the sound I make after cracking open a June shine. That's not what I was going to guess, but okay. Specifically, the best flavor is the blood orange mint. You got to try the blood orange mint. I am telling you, it is at all my little gatherings. I had it the other day after a long day. I took it on a walk with Zaza while she was in the stroller. Yeah. And if you go one episode back, you can actually hear an episode that we just did with the Juneshine founders. You get all the low. But essentially, it is the best hard kombucha

out there. We love it. Juneshine is known, Michael Bostic, as the champagne of kombucha. That's what I'm saying, Lauren. The best. You know that they use green tea and honey as opposed to black tea and sugar for a smoother, less acidic taste. I'm a huge fan of cracking one open, popping my silicone straw right in that hole and just enjoying it. This is a very interesting read, Lauren, but keep going. You could also put it in a wine glass over ice with a little basil or mint. It's so bougie. It's amazing. It tastes delicious. It's 6% alcohol, which is pretty boozy. And it's made with real organic ingredients. And unlike other alcoholic beverages, they're transparent.

They're transparent about every single ingredient that they put in their products. You should also know they donate 1% of all sales to environmental nonprofits and their brewery is powered by 100% renewable solar. So we've worked out an exclusive deal for all Skinny Confidential, him and her podcast listeners. They're delivering nationwide to your doorstep and you're going to receive 20% off plus free shipping on their best selling variety pack. Michael likes the Midnight Painkiller. I'm a huge fan of the Blood Orange Mint. You do you here. You're going to try them all and you're going to pick. You're going to go to juneshine.com slash skinny or use code skinny at checkout to claim this deal. That's J-U-N-E-S-H-I-N-E.com slash skinny. And this discount is only valid for their variety pack. Juneshine can also be found in over 10,000 stores across the country, including Whole Foods, Safeway, Kroger, and Publix. Cheers.

Oh, it's so hard. You know, with family, I think it's about not enabling and not perpetuating it and setting boundaries, you know, and saying so hard not to enable. I know my dad enabled my sister a lot during her drug and alcohol usage. And it's really hard. That's the hardest thing. I think it is. And especially with parents, you know, they're looking at their child and they're, you know, like, want to do anything to save them. But, you know, I've lost a lot of friends. My best friend died in 2019 of a drug overdose. And he was one of the most incredible people I've ever known. And that's happened multiple times in the last 16 years. He's like incredibly bright lights. And I think there's this misconception that I can use one more time. It's not going to happen to me. And like this superhero complex, like it's OK if I go out one more time, like I'll just come back. You know, I killed my friend. And again, I've seen it happen

so many times. So now that you're you're in recovery, is it something that you still have to work on years later or is it really still you still have to work on years later? Totally. You still have to work on it? I do, yeah. Every single day? Not every day, but I have a spiritual practice every morning that I do. You have to tell us. Whatever you can tell us of it. I drink my coffee while I read these different daily readers, daily reflections.

I read eight of them a day. I try and meditate. I'm not a great meditator. I go through years where I like really love it. And then other years where I'm just unable to like get there. But the reading part is I will not start my day without it. And I really it just centers me and just sort of like takes me into my day with positive, you know, outlook and a way to approach life, you know, and life on life's terms and problems that might occur

and just realizing like this isn't happening to me. It's happening for me. You know, it's really about a change in perspective. And that's been really helpful to me. Was it difficult moving to Hollywood, which is like the capital of drugs and alcohol? Oh, there's so many sober people here. It's crazy. There is. Yeah, there's so many. Well, if you're in AA, I know you're not going around obviously talking about the community all the time. So it's, I guess maybe the reason I think there's lots of drugs and alcohol is because I just. Well, there is, but there's also. There certainly is. Yeah, of course. Yeah, of course. I mean, half of my, most of my friends are not sober and a lot of them are, but my closest, closest friends

are not sober. But I don't know. It's funny. My mom used to, my parents would always ask this, like, how do you avoid it? And I just truthfully just never really was presented with like crazy partying friends or drugs in my face. I don't know. Maybe I was just being protected, but it's of no interest to me anyway. So I'm not worried about it. You know, I think that's cool. You wake up every single morning with no hangover. None. I love it. And I'm the most fun friend.

Like all of my friends will tell you, like she is the most fun in the club. We just went to Vegas the other day. And you can stay up in Vegas? Yeah, just Red Bull. Oh my God. You got to teach me how to do that. I'm in bed at eight. I mean, mostly I am too.

But you know, a weekend in Vegas. You can get going. Yeah, I'll go. They pump that oxygen in there. Yeah, exactly. Oh, I forgot they pump oxygen in there. Yeah. I miss Vegas. I haven't been in, what has it been like a year? You don't need to go to Vegas. You in Vegas is a lot for me to handle. Why? Let them go. No, it's a lot. I'll go with you. You guys can go together. No, I'll be in bed at eight. No, not in Vegas. The wind has the best room service. You just sit in there and just eat like a pig. What I love about Vegas is you can go there. You can go to a party.

You can go there to hang out. You can go there to relax. You don't have to just... When people hear Vegas, they feel like, oh, I got to go up the rails. But you can just go and chill out. If I never went to a club in my life again, I think I'd be okay. I like a great leisurely lunch. I thought that till COVID.

And then after being locked inside for a year, I was ready to, you know, ready to go out. You're ready to go. We went to Vegas to go to Carbone essentially. Oh,

yeah. That's why I want to go to Vegas. Yeah. That's the unlock, right? Because people try to go to New York and they have to wait to get a reservation.

It's so hard, but the Vegas one's big. You get in there. Exactly. Carbone is such a moment. You know, they just released their own sauces.

They opened in Miami. Yeah, they did. My birthday's coming up. I want a chihuahua and some sauce. We're going to Vegas. When know they just released their own sauces. They opened in Miami. Yeah, they did. My birthday's coming up. I want a chihuahua and some sauce. We're going to Vegas. When's your birthday?

May 21st. What's your sign? Gemini. Me too. I love it. I'm June 20th. Watch out, bitch. I've got four personalities

at the time. What are you? Aries. Aries. Okay, so I need to find an Aries. You need an Aries. Got it. No, an Aries is the best for Gemini.

I've heard that. Yeah. I feel like I dated an Aries and I don't think it went well. Maybe he was an aries you need an aries no an aries is the best for a gentleman i've heard that yeah i feel like i dated an aries and i don't think it went well maybe he was an aries ish on the cusp maybe okay it depends which personality you were presenting i have to tell you this yeah why i think you're so interesting is that i think a lot of people come to la to get into your industry and one they don't understand how much work it is. Right. And I've seen it firsthand.

It is a lot of work, which we can talk about. And two, I think a lot of people come into this industry and they don't make it like you have. There's a few big players. I don't think there's a lot of big players in your business. And I could be wrong. There's a lot now. It feels like you're one of them.

Thank you. So if you could give someone advice who wants to, one, come in this industry, what would you say about how much work it is? Yeah. And also how you have really made a name for yourself. Well, yeah. So I've been at this for 16 years. I started when I was 17, sort of by accident. My dad actually was producing a television show and forced me to get an internship on it in the wardrobe department. And like I said, it was pre-Rachel Zoe, pre-any, and I fell in love with it the very first day and sort of just decide, okay, this is it. Like, this is what I'm out, you know, gonna do. And I just, you know, I banged down doors until people would hire me. And I just I had this sort of like hustle, hustle mentality where I just would not take no for an answer. And, you know, really never gave up in those moments where you think like, I'm gonna give up now, you know, like, this is too hard to get through. And, you know,

I think that's the difference. I think it's like the people who don't give up. It's the biggest difference. I was telling Lauren that we had to get up the other day. Our flight got canceled coming here to do this and we, you know, kind of split time and your flight got canceled for me. No, no. So we came earlier the week, but we had to get up at like four 30 in the morning. It was not a big deal, but we, the night before it was like Eastern. And I was just like, you just got to, you just, and it's not, that's a very small thing. Oh, you had to give it a four, but we had the baby and the dog and the flight. And I was like, but you just got to go. And I was thinking, I was telling Lauren, I'm like, you know, you don you have to give it four but with the baby and the dog and the flight yeah and i was like but you just gotta go and i was thinking i was telling lauren i'm like you know you don't have to be the smartest person or the most talented person you

just have to be somebody that's just like willing to grind it out and eat shit and never give up and like that is such an unlock because so many people just like they get a little bit uncomfortable and they just quit and that's why they'll never achieve greatness but i totally agree for people that do it's because like you could literally just keep hitting them and hitting them and hitting them and they just keep going and going and going. That was big for me. You know, there were so many moments where, you know, if I was an assistant and the stylist, you know, didn't want to work with me anymore or on to, you know, having my own clients and a client choosing not to want to work with you anymore and move on. Those are those moments where, A, it's so hard not to take personal when it's not. And it took

me many years to realize that this is not about me. This is has nothing to do with me, actually, but to just keep going, you know, those moments where you just don't want to get out of bed. It's sad. It's hard. It's, you know, the 4 a.m. call time and, you know, Palm Springs or whatever. Like, yeah, there's just no to me. There was no option other than to succeed, I guess. And also, I love what I do. Like, I love it so much. I think that's a big misconception is like people see it and they think it looks cool. And then they really don't know what goes into it. And you really have to love this, especially as an intern, you know, to be willing to work those long hours, haul clothes upstairs, you know know do fittings in three different

parts of town in one day like you really really have to love this to want to do that and not everyone does and that's totally fine i think that's part of what separates the people who last and the people who don't like you really i love what i do you have a purpose it's a lot of schlepping so much schlepping like talk about that i mean i whenever i've been styled i i'm like oh my god they have to get the rack the clothes the accessories the shoes the sunglasses and and you can't just bring a few options right you have to bring like all these different options it's also a lot of organization yep can you talk about that well yeah I mean sure so I definitely am like my clients would say I over prep for sure I never come under prepared I guess the stylist that I sort of learned under

were more like that and so I just always felt like obviously the more options the better you never know what kind of mood someone's in or you know they might throw a curveball and you need to make sure that you have it. So I always sort of overdo it. Like, for instance, I had a job yesterday. She needed one look, I think, with four racks of clothes for one look. But it's like, I don't know, does she want a blue suit, a black suit, a pink dress, whatever. So then it's obviously making sure you have enough shoes and jewelry and bags to go with all of that.

And then a lot of the time, like I said said it's like multiple clients in a day or multiple clients at the same event and juggling that making sure that everyone is good and you know can get out the door how do you deal with you're so intimate with someone's body when I would after I gave birth I gained 55 pounds and I was being styled and I was so uncomfortable in my skin. Yeah. I feel like you as a stylist are taking on that energy of someone who doesn't feel confident. How do you deal with that? I have been talking about this company for years. In fact, it's like archived on the blog and that is Rothies. And the reason why I personally am so obsessed with this company is because I love white shoes,

but it's really hard to find the right pair. And these are the right pair. And how do I know this? Because I have probably six pairs. I'm not even joking you guys, they are the best. And what's fun and luckily for Michael is they just launched men's shoes. So Michael and I are sort of twinning now in our white shoes. The reason that we're fans of this brand though, is they're durable and washable and better for the planet. So a fun fact, they have styles that are made with materials like plastic water bottles and they're fully machine washable. My problem was Michael would always like accidentally step on my shoe, my brand new white shoe, which was so annoying and I would just be screwed. But with Rothy's, you can just throw them in the washing machine and they're good to

go. They also have other colors, shapes, styles, whatever. I personally am a big fan of their slip-ons because I am not the best at time management. It's called the sneaker and it's in bright white and it's true to size. So I got a seven and a half. I'm good to go. I have them all over their house. So to help you welcome summer in style, Rothy's is doing something special. Yes, please. That's right. They're giving us the chance to share this super rare opportunity with the skinny confidential, him and her listeners. But this is only for a limited time. Through August 1st, 2021, you get $20 off your first purchase of $100 or more at rothys.com slash skinny. That's R-O-T-H-Y-S dot com slash skinny.

Trust us. You do not want to miss this. You're going to head to rothys.com slash skinny to find your new favorites today. It's both, right? So some people confident and you know it's easy for them and then other women are uncomfortable with where they are postpartum it's I think it's just I've learned to like hold the space for whatever you're going through so if you're really uncomfortable it's like something's not fitting like I'm not gonna sit there and try and like make it just like okay let's move on let's try something else like just keeping it moving so that I think so much of what I do like you said is reading energy so if it's like I could tell you really want this to work like you really love it but the zipper is a little too like okay

let's get the tailor and let's make it fit and like this is worth spending the time but I know my girls especially so well now like you know Haley put something on and I can literally tell within seconds if she's into it or not. And I can also tell us, like, is this worth me pushing her or should I just like just take it off and let's do something else? So so much of it is definitely learning someone, learning their energy and knowing where to push, where to, you know, like, OK, like I said, let's just move on from this. That's smart. No, it's like you're finessing the energy. It's important. Yeah. You're constantly, it's almost like you're a therapist, a stylist. 100%. It's a lot. Big time therapist. It's a lot going on. Yeah. So someone

like Haley, who obviously has such a unique style and she obviously has taste, do you guys collaborate together? Is it something you just bring racks of clothes over and say, here, wear this? How does it work? We would love to know more of the behind the scenes with celebrities and how you style. So Haley and I've been working together now like over five years. I thought it was six. She says it's five. We're in a fight about which one it is. I bought her a gift and I thought it was our six year anniversary. And she's like, it's actually our five. Anyway, we have become such good friends. I absolutely love this human. She is one of the most like just angelic souls I've ever gotten to know. So I think a lot of where we are is built on trust.

It's a lot of like, like I said, knowing the energy, knowing how to read her. In the beginning, I think she leaned more on me. She was like 18 or 19 when we met, obviously still developing her style, obviously still coming into her own as a woman and being in the spotlight and dealing with things that she had never dealt with before. And as time has gone on, she has developed an incredible sense of her own taste and style and doesn't lean on me in the way that she probably used to, where it's so much more collaborative and so much more of a group effort. And so it's just like, what do you think about? I love this, but I think I think I can make

it cooler. And then she'll like grab a jacket. And I'm like, oh, my God, she did. You know, like she really made it cooler. Changes the shoe when she goes home because she likes what she had in her closet better than the one that I had at the office or whatever. Like she has really, really incredible taste. And like I said, doesn't need like it's never me telling, first of all, anyone what to wear. It's it's certainly like they're human beings. They're not, you know, I have certain girls, though, who are like, I literally don't know how to do this. Tell me what to do and I'll do it.

So everyone's different. I just want to be told where to stand. That's that's fine. I think my problem is I'm so focused on my business that I don't have energy in other areas. Of course. That's what I told Michael. It's just like, just tell me where to stand

when it comes to clothes. I don't like, I don't obsess over clothes. I wish I did. I'm glad she doesn't because it saves us a ton. Yeah, I just don't. I don't know. I'm like, don't even, yes, just don't worry about the clothes.

Just do what you're doing. Yeah, I just want to be told what to do. But that's the whole point of what I do. You know, these women are incredibly busy, are juggling an enormous amount in their life. I think a lot of people don't understand like, what, they can't even walk out the door without being styled or whatever. You know, these are women who are running businesses,

often are mothers, you know, are wives, are on set here, there, the other place on a plane. This, the last thing they want to have to think about is what to put on, especially when there's 10 paparazzi parked outside of your house every day, which adds a whole other level of pressure and eyes and scrutiny. And, you know, so to feel confident, you know, so much of what I do is just like the fact that I get to instill confidence in women that they can go out and face the world and feel strong and feel like they're representing themselves the way that they want to is such an honor. You know, it's to me, it's like, it's really not about the clothes. It's about this energy that you can put forth

with clothes, you know, and, and feel like really strong because it's hard. This industry is hard. And, you know, there's so many eyes and comments on Instagram. You know, it's like, I beg the people who have nasty comments on Instagram to say it to my face. You know, I beg you, they won't. You know, it's like people hide behind these screens and that's a different conversation. Oh, let's hop into it. We're loving this conversation. Let's hop into it. I think we talk about a lot lately. And I know there's a lot of people that be like, oh, we're out of touch. Like a lot of people would dream to be in a position to be styled and be a celebrity. And so they, but, and so they don't, they're like, they are not immune to the human condition, you know? And that's the misconception, I think. Yes. 100%. But they, they, I think people think because

they think this is this glamorous lifestyle and like they wish, like a lot of people wish they could be at that, that because those people in those positions, they deserve to get all the hits and all the hate that comes with it, right? There's like, well, since they're there, they deserve it. And I've never really understood that mentality. I've never understood a mentality of people wanting to be mean just because somebody's in a position, a public position. Well, I don't get it.

They're projecting their own insecurity and fears on other people. I mean, they're projecting how they feel about themselves. This isn't about, you know, I don't like your Harley Davidson shirt. They don't like their, I love it, but you know what I'm saying? Do you like it? I love it. Okay. But no, I get what you're saying. You know, it's not that, and that it's taken me, you know, it's taken me a very long time to understand it. I've been on the receiving end of it. I see it with my clients on a daily basis. And like I said, this misconception that just because they signed up for this means that they should be able to handle negativity and that kind of energy thrown at them every day.

And I just can't understand it. I can't, it is the furthest thing from the truth. These are human beings, you you know and they are not immune like when it comes to inclusivity because that's the big thing now right is inclusivity you either have to be inclusive of everyone or you have to opt out of the conversation you can't take pockets of people and be like well these people don't be it's like you're either inclusive to everyone or you're not yeah when someone skinny shames someone and i'm like but if you're you're someone who's who hates fat shaming but you're skinny shaming someone all i'm like but if you're you're someone who's who hates fat

shaming but you're skinny shaming someone all the same it's it's so hypocritical it's just it's so crazy that people take the time to go comment something so negative on someone else's platform i know that hayley turned her comments off she did which i thought's fucking bossy it's like i'm gonna shut this down bitch this is my fucking house. It's locked up and you're kicked out. Exactly. I mean, and she's such a boss for it. And I have so much respect for her for doing it. She deleted her Twitter.

Her comments are only on to the people that she follows. So they're, you know, her friends. And yeah, you have to protect your mental. You know, I just went through something recently on Instagram. I'm not going to, I can't get into the details of it right now. But where I was, you know, bombarded with thousands of hateful comments and for something I didn't do. And it was debilitating. You know, it was like.

Hold on. Something you didn't do. Yeah, I can't. You don't have to explain it. But what do you what do you mean? Give us like a little more context. Something you did. Someone accused me of doing something that wasn't true.

And so then, you know, perpetuated a narrative that wasn't true. So the mob mentality came. Exactly. So the cancel culture, the mob mentality, without having the information, without thinking, is this true? That's big for me. You know, it's, you know, before I jumped to conclusions, do I know this to be true? For sure.

The answer would, of course, have been no to all these people. It was so painful, you know, for a few days, you know, to get to lean on my clients who deal with this on a daily basis. You know, I just started working with the D'Amelio sisters, 16 and 19. You know, they're dealing with this at such a young, important age, grow, you know, like just, you know, and for them to be like, don't worry, give it three days, you know, like, don't worry. It's like, and, but did everyone say that? I would love to know. Everyone said that. Don't worry. Give it three days. It'll go away, you know, but it hit me after a few days, you know, there's this also this misconception. If you delete

comments or you turn your comments off, you're guilty. And so I had left them for, I think the first two days. And then it sort of hit me like, why are you being a martyr? Why are you allowing this? I don't allow comments about my clients negatively on my page. If you come to my page and say something negative about a client, I will block you. I not even just delete. You are not allowed to do that. You know, like this is, this is my space for my girls and I'm not going allow the hatred on my page and so it hit me after two days of this you're not being kind to yourself because people think that again people think with people in public forums like we all deserve a voice like no you fucking don't you don't get

if you're gonna be rude mean discriminatory attack you don't get a voice if you come to my house and you kick your shoes up and tell me to fuck myself and whatever else like kill yourself whatever you want to say i would say get out right so i have the same mentality about my instagram if you're gonna come on and and and speak from a troll ass account and say something fucked up yeah you're gonna get blocked agreed and deleted and you know my favorite one my favorite one this is a little hot tip yeah this is my favorite one they just did when they when they come on and they're so fucking rude and they type their thing and then i press restrict so they think they don't know that i've restricted them so no one can comment back no one can like it and i can decide who sees

it and so then they keep commenting rude shit and no one ever sees it so guess what that's wasting their time and energy i know i know it's too. I mean, I try and see it from the pain that they must be in to behave that way. So I started this brand. But that's like me saying, I used to think that way too. And I do still think, okay, that must be a pain position, but it's not my responsibility or yours or Lauren's to heal that pain. And just because like, it's like me saying like, you know, I don't like someone. So I'm going to walk up to the middle of a restaurant,

just punch him in the face because I'm in a pain position. It's like people be like, no, you're going to fucking jail, Michael. You can't do that. No, you're right. People say like, oh, you're silencing voices. I'm like, goddamn right. Because if you're a negative, angry, mean voice that's attacking, you don't deserve to have a voice with me.

Go do that somewhere else. I also want to say though, if it's a constructive comment, like something, for instance, hey, Lauren, you say like too much on the podcast. OK, well, that's something maybe I could work on. Right. If it's constructive, I'm open to it. But if you're just being an asshole, bye bye.

I agree. I want to hear about your brand that you're starting. And I want to hear about how you're starting the brand. Do you know one of the topics that we discussed in my book, Michael? Because I know you've read it cover to cover. Well, there's a lot of topics. And if it's how to manipulate a man into skincare, we've already been through that, Lauren. You love talking about your chapter. There's other chapters besides your chapter. I flipped right to my chapter, glazed over the rest. I'm just kidding. I read it cover to cover. You did. So you read all about humidifiers. I read all about humidifiers and I know the benefit of humidifying. And why did I have a humidifier in my book? Well,

skincare experts and dermatologists have been constantly talking about the benefits of increased indoor humidity for healthy, glowing, plump skin. So enter Canopy. Canopy Humidifier is by far my favorite. Here's why. I interviewed the team, okay? And I found out that one, those traditional nasty-ass humidifiers are a real eyesore. They're bulky and they're ugly, but most importantly, they collect mold. So that's where canopy humidifier comes in. So this one doesn't collect mold. It's so cute. It's chic. It elevates your home and it plumps the skin. And how do I know that? Because I use mine every single day and my skin is way more plump when I turn it on. Okay. There's also not a visible mist like traditional humidifiers. And what they found is that it's unhealthy due to particles and bacteria being carried by the

water into the air. So canopy has this mist free hydration. It's invisible. It's clean moisture. And this is the best kind for your skin and health. You should also know that it has a built in aroma diffuser and this like sense the room. It's cute. It's compact. You're going to go to get canopy.co and you're going to save $25 on your canopy humidifier purchase today with canopies filter subscription. Plus you'll receive a free aroma kit. You're going to love this. I'm telling you. And this is to be used with canopies built in aroma diffuser, Even better, use code skinny10. I know, it's like a fairy godmother. At checkout to save an additional 10% off

your Canopy purchase. Your skin will thank you. As a grown adult, I have dealt with having clients who have, you know, opposition fans who have something to say, whether they didn't like the way they dressed or who they're dating or whatever the case may be. And so I've been on the receiving end many times of that. And that's nothing in comparison to what my girls deal with in real life, you know, all the time, like every single day, as we said, Haley turned off her comments. And in the middle of this pandemic and thinking about what are some new businesses I can start and new avenues, I have always wanted to do a clothing line. And it just hit me, do sweats. I live in sweatpants.

Make them and have the message be about love and kindness. My ex said something to me. I said, I really want to do something about anti-bullying. And he told me this little story about Mother Teresa that like Mother Teresa would never go to a rally for anti-violence, but she would go to a rally for peace. And so by not saying the word anti-bullying, by not perpetuating the negative, how can I bring positive into this situation? That is so genius. It's all about switching your language. I agree.

If I always, whenever this is so stupid, but if I'm emailing or writing an Instagram caption, I stay away from words like don't, can't, unfortunately. What is worse than someone that starts an email with unfortunately? I'm like, what is the solution? Give me a solution. Unfortunately, like, fuck yourself. But what is the solution? Give me a solution. Unfortunately, like, fuck yourself. But it is important to pay attention to language. So that makes so much sense about Mother Teresa. I love that. Me too. And so, you know, OK, so this brand is not anti-bullying,

but it's about spreading love and kindness, you know, and with an underlying message. And part of the proceeds are going to the Kind Campaign. So the Kind Campaign was started by two incredible women, Lauren Paul and Molly Thompson. They started it 12 years ago. And it's basically they created a curriculum to go into schools, like combat the bullying that's already occurred there. They heal it.

They go in and they put these girls in a room. It's focused on females. And they heal what is happening, you know? And they leave there and these girls have basically like forgiven each other and are choosing to move forward. And it was so important for me to align my brand. Like if I think about if that had been there for me, you know, when I was a kid, how would that have changed my life? You know, how would that have literally changed the trajectory of the woman I became if I had dealt with that at that time? And so when I saw what they were doing, I just thought like we

have to we have to help them. And we got on the phone and I watched their documentary and I was I literally cried the whole 55 minutes of this documentary. Like it was so moving to me. You know, we're donating a part of our proceeds to them. And I hope, you know, also by talking about it, people know more about them. And are the sweats Haley approved? Because Haley lives in sweats. The sweats are very Haley approved. They started with actually, you know, we try on so many sweats. We see so many amazing brands all the time. And I really wanted like I know which one she wears all the time and sort of was like, I'm gonna pay attention to that in in what I make so we made a really big oversized crew neck and an oversized hoodie and the pants I always feel like sweats are too short so 100% yeah so the pants are long and they pull at the bottom it's also unisex so you guys can share you could literally share the

same size I love that yeah who is the coolest celebrity you've styled? Do you have like a cool story? Besides Hailey. No, no, I can't. They're all amazing. You know, like I, I love my girls. I, I, I love my girls so much. I've been working with Lala Anthony for years. She's the best.

They all, they all are just different, you know? And I just, I love all of them. Sierra, I love everyone I've ever worked with on it. Well, I haven't loved everyone, but most. Who have you not loved? What does it rhyme with? Some have been very challenging. I'm sure. Yeah, I'm sure.

I'm blessed to be. You're going to write your book. Give us the juice. Well, you know, the only thing I will say about it is to be in a position where I will only work with kind and sweet people at this point. You know, I paid my dues. I did the years of challenging relationships and to be in a position where I can say no to someone because, you know, maybe they're not so nice or their energy doesn't match with mine. I mean,

that's a big blessing. You know, that takes a long, long time. I started my career and part of the advice would be to just say yes to everything, which I did for many years. You know, yes, we do this. Yes, yes. And you just build and build and build. And, you know, I think a lot of it is like right place at the right time. And that's how a lot of my like big opportunities actually happen. They just, it was like literally just right. Yeah, there's stages and seasons.

I tell, I have a younger sister and I tell her, I'm like right now when she's so young, she's like 23 or 24 or 25. And I'm using her as an example. But even Lauren's sister, I say like, when you're that young and you have like all this energy, like say yes to everything. But then you get to a point where you say no to everything, right? Tony Robbins says this best. He says, and this is exactly how I built my career too. So you say yes, yes, yes to everything until it stops serving you. And then you have to pivot when it stops serving you. And it sounds like what you did is you said yes to everything. And now you're able to curate what works for you and build a really great business off of it. I would like to know just selfishly

how you run your business. You seem like a boss who is very organized. It seems like you said, you've got assistants, you've got interns. How do you run your team? You have a big team. I have an amazing agent. I'm with Kent Belden, who created the only agency. I was one of the first ones to sign with them and my agent, Mia. And then there's a, we have a publicist there who helps organize when like press stuff comes up. So that takes a lot of the pressure off with scheduling. Just, you know, like they handle so much of it, travel, fitting times, billing. So much of the stuff that I had to do on my own for so many years was taken off my plate where I can truly just focus on the creativity part, which is obviously what I'm in it for. And then I have an amazing office,

so beautiful. And, you know, it's my third one. That's my, you know, we just level up every couple of years where we've outgrown a space and we move on. We've been in the current one for about a year and it's gorgeous. It actually used to be Rachel's office, which is just such a trip. It was her styling office before she moved into that Melrose one, which became her brand. But you know, it's so funny. Like, you know, I looked up to her so much when I was young. Like she was just the epitome of L.A. cool, incredible, talented stylist. She she was just the epitome of la cool incredible talented stylist she she was everything i you know wanted to emulate in my career i didn't want to do actresses the way that she did i'm much more drawn to musicians and the um creativity where you can really push

someone in anyway stretch the boundaries yeah i think that like to you know to then be considered her peer and friend and also in her old space is such a testimony yeah for you but it's just such a testimony so anyone can you know like it's just incredible you know I don't take it for granted ever I'm I live I try to live from a space of gratitude every day you know I even when I'm stressed out even when I'm overwhelmed and honestly even sometimes when I don't mean it I just just thank you universe. Thank you God, you know, for everything that's coming. Cause I think when you stress out and put negativity on the level of busy you're at, you're telling the universe, you don't want it, you know? And the more that I come

from this space of, I'm just so thankful, you know, thank you. Thank you. Thank you. The more it flows and the easier. Yeah. You know, you're so right. I talk to entrepreneurs all the time where people that are trying their hand at being an entrepreneur, running their own business, let's say working for yourself. And the people that are constantly complaining, like I'm overwhelmed, I'm overworked. I'm like, yeah, if you have the audacity to like build something for your own and set your own schedule and build life on your terms, like it's going to come with all that. But you have to flip it and be like, I'm so thankful that I'm in this position. And if you can't do that, you really are not cut out to run something

for yourself because it's not ever going to be easy. I told Lauren the other day, she launched her business and I said, congratulations, it's going to get way harder. I said, you just got done with the easy part. Now it's going to get really fucking hard. Yeah, I totally agree. I totally agree. I had this hairstylist too, who would be so busy she had like six clients and different chairs and she just had a baby and she would i would be in the chair and she would say like i'm just so grateful i'm so grateful and it was it was also the way it made me feel you know if i come in the room with my clients and i'm like stressed and fucking you know my energy's crazy they don't want to be around that.

You know what I mean? It's my responsibility to come into a room and make it better, you know, like to uplift the energy and the space and make them feel good. Like I said, it's just clothes. You know, nobody wants to work for someone like that. No, and I won't. My assistant, same thing, like always a smile on their face. And they work so hard, you know,

like they really go above and beyond. They work longer days than I do a lot of the time because they've got to bring the clothes to where the shoot is and pack it up at the end of the day and put it in the office and put it in the safe. And, you know, they work even longer than I do a lot of the time. And even though most of the time I'm going home to like run my other businesses and whatever, but it's still it's just a different thing. I can't have that energy around me. I like I just won't do it, you know. And you talked off air a little bit about therapy. Yeah.

I would like to know how therapy has helped you, how you think it's helped you become who you're meant to be. OK, well, how long do we have for this question? So you had my therapist on. Habib Sudeikis, my doctor, my therapist, an amazing episode. I loved listening to you guys. Yeah, so thank you for that.

You know, I found him in a time, I've done therapy on and off my whole life, but never like this. And I found him in a time, I was in a relationship and we were really trying to make it work and it wasn't working. And we made the decision to consciously uncouple and which is something that he's sort of

known for. And it was the most painful moment of my entire life. This person and I had a very, very deep, energetic connection. I just felt like I always knew him. I just felt like he was the one for me. And I was I was fucking grasping so tight, you know, to make it work. And and he and he knew, you know, he knew like this relationship is not serving us both and we, to make it work. And, and he, and he knew, you know, he knew like this relationship is not serving us both and we need to let this go. And he had the courage to walk away from something that was not easy to walk away from. And so I found Habib in this moment and we did, you know, we stopped doing therapy together and I went on my own journey with him. And what I realized in that breakup really had nothing to do with

the relationship. You know, he often says, you know, Lauren is not the issue. Like Lauren is irrelevant, right? Like it's about you. And Tim was irrelevant for me. It was about what I needed to learn and grow through at that time. And I had done this program called Insight, which is amazing. It's sort of like a group therapy thing, but it really got me to the core of the issue, which was the bullying stuff and realizing that I needed to heal that to become the woman I wanted to become because, you know, I had separated myself so much just because I was afraid of people. You know, I was just afraid to connect because I was afraid they were going to hurt me. And I spent a lot of time, you know, alone, like, you know, people being like very like she's so rough. She's so like New York, you know,

she's such a demon. I whatever. Really, I was just afraid I was just pushing you away, you know. And as I started to work, like to break those walls down, was a like you know based on this breakup and again it really had nothing to do with my ex it had to do with you know what I needed to look at and you know he started to take me through this journey of like getting back to myself and getting to my heart and it changed everything it changed my entire life You know what I what I'm having trouble with with a therapist is finding the right one. Totally. What is so like what are what makes him different? I guess he is so different. You know, I think part of it is like it's not the issue. It's how you relate to the issue and seeing every opportunity, everything that happens as an opportunity to learn and grow. And this isn't happening to you. It's happening for you. What is this challenge? What is this pain actually showing you to work through? You know, it's not about the guy who attacked me on Instagram. It was about, you know, how am I going to process that? How am I going to react to it? How am I going to show up and be the woman that I want to be when I'm like really challenged by something you know it sounds like you almost had post-traumatic

stress after being bullied so bad and when that happens on Instagram it brings up that post-traumatic stress totally exactly and here I am like you know starting a brand about anti-bullying and getting like you know bullied you're starting a brand about peace. Yes. There you go. Peace, love and kindness. I, you know, he, he is just, he, I don't even know. Like he's just one of the most incredible humans and he holds a space for me that allows me to arrive at the answer on my own. Like he might direct a little bit and suggest me to look, look this, look this way, you know, but really it's like those moments of clarity that come, I get there on my own. You know, I think it's not having a therapist sit across from you and tell you about yourself and tell

you what you need to work on because that doesn't work for anybody. You know, I want to go see him. He's so good. I know I'm going to, I'm going to message him on Instagram. He's really changed my life. He's like really an amazing person. And on top of that, you know, really brought me to a place with God, you know, with the universe, with really having so much faith that everything is happening exactly the way it is supposed to for my highest good and for the highest good of all concerned, you know, and being in that much pain and that ending of that relationship, the only way I could get through that was to lean on some sort of higher power, which of course, recovery has always taught me, but it was a much deeper level. And it was really missing from my life up until that point. And that's probably the greatest gift he ever gave me was really just knowing that I can handle anything if I'm, you I'm good spiritually.

Yeah. It's so interesting when you take a long time and nobody's perfect and definitely not me, but when you get to a place where you can actually start to observe your thoughts. Yeah. Joe Dispenza. I want him on the podcast. That's what he says. Watch your thoughts in the morning. You observe your thoughts and you observe the way that you react to external circumstances. So the world, and let's call it the universe really doesn't give a shit about any of us. And it's, we're such a tiny, tiny microscopic blip in the time of like human civilization. And if you think about the world, like even smaller and we, you know, sometimes we

put ourselves in the position where we think like we are the center of all that, but really like the world's going to do what the world's going to do. And it's up to you to decide like how you observe those events. It's, it sounds like a weird thing, but it's, it's true. Like, like somebody could, I remember like I used to, I, I used to, Lauren said I didn't like booze. I used to get in fights when I was younger. I don't anymore. Like I don't. You were, you were picked on though. No, no, but, but I used to get in fights. Right. And I remember like after a while, like if I, if somebody came up to anybody else or the majority of people on the

street and punch him in the face, it would be like the most traumatic, biggest deal. Like, oh my God, I can't believe someone would do that event that ever happened. They would not believe it. I got to a place with me, like somebody would punch, like throw a punch or something. And it, it was almost like, it didn't upset me. I was like, okay, like their, their perspective is they're angry. They're mad. They're doing this. They think that like, I never got emotional about it after a point. And I realized, oh, it switched because I started observing it in a different way. I'm like, this is just energy that's coming at me.

It's being channeled in an angry way. But like, it wasn't like this traumatic. It's weird. So I think the reason I bring all this up is as human beings, your perspectives shift and change and you get to decide like how you react to all these things. You could be angry, you could be sad, you could be upset, or you can like take a practical approach like, okay, this is happening because of X, Y, and Z. And I'm going to choose to be either positive about it or practical about it or logical. And so I remember I'd see like a guy

getting a fight with like the day later and people are like, oh, aren't you so angry? And I'm like, no, like I get it. Like we had a little thing, like he was angry, I was angry. It was like, it was, I don't know. It was just- And then I met you and I was like, oh, aren't you so angry? And I'm like, no, like I get it. Like we had a little thing, like he was angry. I was angry. It was like, it was, I don't know. It's just. And then I met you and I was like, I'm done with this. But I bring all this up because I think something happened, like someone attacks somebody or says something and immediately they're like, oh my God, this is happening to me. This is such an affront to me. Like I need to be offended. I need to be upset. You don't have to be, you're choosing to be. Part of Hab of habib's he there's this concept of being the neutral observer yes that's exactly what i'm touching on he says it much more eloquently

than me yeah he says be the neutral observer just sit and observe and not i have this tattooed on me it's this roomy quote it says out beyond the ideas of wrongdoing and right doing there is a field i'll meet you there it's it's about, you're right. And that guy is right or wrong and wrong, you know, and, and like, just get to a place of just neutrality with that. Like, you know, I just came out of a relationship and, and I think what he needed in the relationship, what I need were two different things and that's okay. There's nothing wrong with that. He's not wrong and I'm not wrong, but we're just, so to just get to a place of neutrality of like, you know, cool, let's just all move on, you whatever that may look like you choose to be any any reaction you have you

personally are choosing i say like you me lauren so if we get divorced and i'm on my second husband we should go to dr habib to constant consciously and he told us that you guys are not uncoupling i'll fucking kill you i always say like i'm I'm like people that I'm triggered. I'm offended. I'm angry. I'm upset. It's like, well, are you, are you choosing to be those emotions and are those emotions actually serving you in a productive way? And if they're not, you can actually choose to not be any of those things. When you point that out to people, some people get very angry about that because they're like, why are you questioning my emotion? I'm like, no, I'm not. I'm telling you, I'm asking you to question, are those emotions and responses serving you? And if they are, go with God. And if they're not, you're the only one that can change them.

I totally agree with you. That's important. I have to ask you this question because you're so good at what you do and it's a twist, but what are some easy, tangible, digestible tips that you can give our audience and me on styling quick? Well, I always start with dressing for your body type. I think it's really important that you dress for your body type. You know, just because you see, you know, Haley or whatever, like, you know, if you don't have the same shape, the same clothes are not going to look the same. And so I dress women with all different size, you know, bodies and which is I love so much, you know, it's it's it's like such an honor

to get to dress different kinds of women. And and that said, you know, what looks good on Haley might not look great on Lala and what might look great on Lala might not look good on Haley. And, you know, I think if you're trying to figure out your style, I think it's so much of like what actually is most flattering for your shape, you know, and go that direction. And I also love to tell people to pull reference photos. If you see an outfit that you love so much, you know, take that image. And when you go out shopping or if you're online or whatever, you can sort of try to recreate it in your own way within your own budget. I think that's a really great way to start to build your aesthetic if something really speaks to you with, you know, someone's style. I love reference photos. Important. I love those tips. I'm going

to take them. Taylor, you're going to take them too. You are so, you have so much depth and so multifaceted and so interesting thank you and for my next shoot i'm hiring you okay good i'm so inspired to dress cuter maybe i can start with your sweat we're gonna get you we're gonna get dr good yeah i'm gonna get like everybody's gonna be there khabib and i used to go on lives together when covid first happened and i had covid and so we would like try and like we would go on Instagram lives together and answer people's questions. It was so fun. On a scale of one to 10, how bad was COVID? For me, I was very lucky. It was not bad for me at all. And and again, it's like seeing things as seeing things as an opportunity, right? Like Habib and I talked a lot about like if you can't go

outside, you can't go out, go within, you know, and I went through a really interesting period of healing, actually, just being alone. It was very early in the pandemic. It was like March like 17th. So it was like really early. I could hardly get tests and I had symptoms. I couldn't smell and taste. That was the only thing that happened. And but it was for six weeks and I stayed inside the whole time because we didn't know like we didn't know that like after two, you were probably fine. And I didn't want to waste tests because I just, they were so hard to get. And so I just stayed inside and really like had an amazing experience with myself and God. And it was a good thing for me, you know, and I ended up also building some businesses out of it. I know that not everyone had that experience, you know, and my heart goes

out to people who lost a lot. You know, I just chose to see it in a different way, I guess. You are inspiring. Thanks. Where can everyone find you? Pimp yourself out. Tell us where we can buy your line, your Instagram, all the things. Okay. So my Instagram is stylememave and my brand is the local love club also can be found on Instagram and our website. We're launching the last week of April. I can't wait for everyone to see it it's beautiful and yummy and cozy and yeah that's me right now you're incredible come back anytime thank you thanks for having me you guys are amazing thanks for holding this space for people it's great next time you come on yeah dr habib's coming on with you oh that'd be fun yeah that would be a little round table moment let's do therapy on michael and fucking corner him that would be fun listen i need a lot of help

taylor q sugar storm from gone girl thank you for coming you guys are awesome thanks before you go i am giving away a copy of get the fuck out of the sun it's a signed copy from me to you. All you have to do is tell us your favorite part of this episode on my latest Instagram at Lauren Bostic. And with that, we'll see you next week for another fire episode.