The Sloppy Boys - 104. Sloe Gin Fizz

Episode Date: October 14, 2022

A British berry brings unique flavor to this Collins-esque fizz.SLOE GIN FIZZ RECIPE1.5oz/45ml Sloe Gin1oz/30ml Lemon Juice.75oz/22ml Simple Syruptop off with Club SodaAdd sloe gin, lemon juice and simple syrup into a cocktail shaker filled with ice and shake. Strain into a highball or Collins glass filled with ice. Top up with soda. Garnish with lemon wedge and cherry.Recipe via Liquor.com Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hey folks, welcome to the Sloppy Boys where we take a deep dive into the drinks that you love. I'm Jeff Dutton along with Michael Hanford. Boo, gotcha. And Timothy Kalpakis. What is up? And we're your hosts for the third best comedy podcast this side of mercury it's the sloppy boys damn hey speaking of mercury what's in retrograde these days stop is it what is it no virgo season are we virgo season what's your moon rising? I don't get any of that stuff. Oh, God. Everyone wants to

know my rising moon rising. I don't know. How's this for how my moon's rising? I'm annoyed right now, okay? You're pissing me off. Yeah, how about the only thing that's gonna rise is my foot up your ass, and the only moon you're gonna see is me mooning you. It's these cheeks.

My foot up your ass, and the moon is gonna be my ass. And then my foot's going to go in my own ass. What time were you guys born? I'm going to look into this. You know, I've been good lately. Fingering my own ass. I'll tell you something about moons and retrogrades and stuff. It's cold here

now. It got chilly in New York. And I love it. It's cold here now. I'm keto now. I'm keto now. Ah, the keto things fall apart. Let me tell you what I had yesterday. No, this is Saturday. I had old pizza for breakfast. I had not keto.

I had pasta for lunch and I had a hoagie for dinner. You're doing Hanford Gets Healthy. Hanford Gets Healthy, but he takes Saturday off, apparently. Yesterday was Sunday. But it's cold here now. So, uh,

I'm enjoying, you know me, I love the cozy stuff. I love bundling up. I got my heat on now in my apartment. Ooh, I love getting cozy. It's cozy season for me. It's so funny when you're just, when you treat the heater in your apartment like it's a fireplace. Like, ooh, yes. Oh, you're on now.

That's also, you know, you can't say like, ooh, I love when it gets cold. I turn on the heater. Like, no, that means you don't like the cold. Oh, yeah, you hate the cold. That's like when Mitch would say, I love an East Coast summer. You're at home with the AC on. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Sitting in your bedroom.

What are you talking about? I do like bundling up. Yesterday, it's been rainy here for the past couple of days, and yesterday I was coming home. I had been out. I was out at a bar. I was watching some football with some friends. I was in a fun mood.

My team had won, and I was feeling good. I was a little red behind the ears, as I like to say. Meaning I'm a little drunk. Does anyone know what you mean? He means he's a little drunk, they say. So I'm walking home, and it's raining, and my hat blows right off my head and into a puddle. Like a puddle of brown, dirty water i love that band puddle of brown black water it was it was that hat i wear that's kind of like uh like a surf hat and

it's like a waterproof kind no no the beige yeah the beige was kind of nylon oh that's the best that's your best hat that's good it's like. It's like a Palm Springs hat, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah. It went right in the puddle. And it was, you know, I was kind of having fun with myself and my surroundings. And this kid, I'd say he's probably like 18, 19-year-old. He like sees it go in the puddle. He goes, oh, no.

I go, oh, my hat. Oh, that stinks. I pick it up, and I look at him like, what do I do? Do I wash it? Can I wash it? What do I do? And he goes, I knew I was joking around. And he looks at me.

He's like, oh, man, I don't know. I don't know what you do. Jeez, man, I'm sorry. I was like, don't worry about it. It it's okay i'll wash it when i get home he couldn't help you in your time of need he's sorry he saw an older man be like what do i do you you deal with this all the time they use what do i do you you own cool hats probably what do i do do you have you stayed oh yeah that's my that's my little i haven't talked to him since yesterday What do I do? You own cool hats, probably. What do I do? Do you have to stay in touch with that guy?

That's my little... I haven't talked to him since yesterday. That's my little weather story. We all got our little weekend weather stories. So that's what's going on with you recently, Mike. You guys want to see what's going on with me? I'd love it. Yeah. Take a look at this.

Oh! Chain! He's got a chain! He's so proud. I'm wearing a gold chain and a black t-shirt, just like I promised a year ago on this pod. I was going to become a black t-shirt. That's a nice thin little chain there you got there.

Yeah, it's a nice thin little chain. Mike Tyson. Okay, Tyson. All right, all right. Okay, one more thing. Here's another weird thing that's going on. This wasn't even really planned, but look what I'm drinking. What the?

That looks nasty. That looks like something that was in the puddle I lost my head in. Cold soup. What kind of soup? Because you got a lot of stuff. Is that minestrone? It's chunky. It was an egg drop soup, but then I put a bunch of my chili paste in there.

And you're eating cold. It looks fucking putrid. It looks putrid. Well, you got a haircut, too, it looks like. You get a haircut? Mm-hmm. You got the mustache still going. The mustache is crisp.

I like that thing. Yep. You look good. I trimmed it up. You got the chain. Brought it in a little bit. Yeah, I can tell it looks a little too good. It's a little too much to do the chain and the t-shirt and the mustache, because I... No. Yep. You look good. I trimmed it up. You got the chain. Brought it in a little bit. Yeah, I can tell it looks nice. It's a little too much to do the chain and the t-shirt and the mustache because I...

No. No, it's not. Well, I mean, what else? What do you... Why just have one? Well, when I did the mustache, I felt like I was trying to look like Ernest Hemingway. When I do the chain, I was kind of trying to look like Tony Soprano. But when I have black t-shirt, gold chain and mustache, I feel

like I'm kind of like a slow jams guy from the early 90s or something like that. Nothing wrong with that. That's great. I'm looking at the whole combo and I got no notes. Okay. Would it be weird? How does your chain look on something like your

Tabasco shirts or something? Is that weird? Maybe you don't even notice it on Tabasco shirts go what's really good is when i if if i if i have a button down shirt and it peeks out it's like a kind of like a neck tattoo that just peeks out that's good you want to incidentally catch it if i put it on the outside of a polo shirt i look like a insane guy i'll tell you what it what looks best no shirt yeah i was at the. I was hanging out at a pool all weekend. Every time I caught a glimpse of my reflection with a chain and no shirt, I was like, God damn, I should have been there. Fellas, let's say you don't love your body.

You're not in love with your physique. Where am I catching gold chain? And especially if you have chest hair, it's a whole thing going on down there you know yeah it's a whole world but you put a little a little gold spoon on the end of it too yeah no that could have implications but but i was thinking it gives shape to the neck it gives shape to the neck and shoulders otherwise you just got a bunch of flesh down there it's just flesh and i don't know when i was looking at myself in the reflection

with this chain and no shirt i was like typically you see yourself no shirt on you think i gotta get in better shape in this case i was like what if i put on a few pounds like i kind of like you can pull it up like bigger chains bigger body just more more more you know you're taking you're taking focus away from the problem areas that That's good. When I'm out by the pool, I put on one of those big foam cowboy hats. You two found that funny. I'm glad. Well, that's a nice update from the East Coast, Mike. Now, Tim, do we have any updates in the world of booze news?

Hit it. You know what it is, though, honestly? The pride of the Greeks. I'm right on the Adam's apple. Light! It's Boo's News, you money-munching megalomaniacs. That's good. The Boozis Newsis was sent to us by famed New England slobhead Harglebarg.

Hey. Hey. Met him at the Boston show. That was, what's that song? Black Skinhead? Yep. By Kanye? Off Yeezus. Off Yeezus.

But that's me screaming when i and jeff screaming because we had an electric dog collar shocking our necks and if you have a booze news theme email to the sloppy boys podcast at gmail.com okay guys here's the top story today oh good guess what came to us from the great lady aka i couldn't imagine new. I couldn't imagine. The New York Times, Michael's hometown newspaper. Oh, my gosh. Yes, I have the app. Oh, wow. I have the app.

I pay for a yearly subscription to the app. I don't do Wordle. I do the crossword from time to time. They get harder as the week goes on. Enough. Mike. Silence. Jesus Christ. harder as the week goes on enough mike as a silence jesus um do you do the queen bee spelling bee i have before okay that's enough of that uh perhaps as a subscriber you read this story

in the new york times the second coming of the appletini. What? As nostalgia drips, drips, as nostalgia grips, drinkers, bartenders are giving vilified nineties concoctions like the lychee martini and the lemon drop an upgrade and ushering in a new martini era. So Appletini, we all associate with sex in the city and uh the lemon drop and so we're talking

basically the martini menu of all the different colors of martinis that we've all been kind of pushing back on for a long time it's it's coming back around you guys seeing this anywhere you out there you're saying the dark ages are being brought into the light? I think the dark ages are being brought into the light. Exactly. I mean, I have seen a little lychee or lychee martini out there. Sorry, everybody. Lychee. Lychee?

Yeah, like Lychee Lee. I think, yes, people are drinking teenies again. They're getting weird out there. They're getting wild. Looking at this article, though, it's talking about all the different places in New York that are kind of doing these, yeah, 90s, early 2000s. That's interesting, isn't it?

Ones, and they're kind of like, you know, it's talking about what even- Chocolatini. Defines a martini. I mean, hey, the espresso martini is still going strong. But you know what this reminded- Because the article is kind of talking about all the ways that bartenders are making a good um but obviously there's there's

they're playing off a little bit of irony here first right like there's something funny about putting an appletini on your menu but then a proud bartender wants to say you know what i didn't use pucker yeah we have this really good apple stuff where i infuse the vodka with apple right and and all of this is sort of reminding me of last spring the uh suburban chic movement of sort of being like ha ha we're a cool restaurant in new york but you're gonna feel like you're at an applebee's in the midwest or something yes you've been tracking it tim fair and square it reminds me of those restaurants i think there's one in la there's gotta be a couple in la that's like it's street

vendor food but done just so yeah yes like decontrol you know we used to have a place called uh twa familia that was like ludo la fav or whatever and and like the the petit toi team kind of almost like french chefs doing the taco bell menu is sort of like the pitch oh right interesting see here's the thing though i don't know if that works i like all this in theory until they're like yeah we're taking like a throwback ironic thing and we're doing it really good and we're charging you 23 dollars oh yeah yeah they'll get you. Yeah. Now, I should have brought this up earlier in earlier episodes, but you remember a couple weekends ago

I sent you guys a picture of myself at Bemelman's Bar. Yes. Yeah. Now, that was a very classy place. I was there. I'm surprised you got in there, Mike. I'm surprised, too. It was like 4 o'clock and the bartender made sure to tell me

when I sat down at the bar. Make it quick. Essentially. He's like, so at 5 o'clock they charge a $10 cover because there's a piano player in here. I was like, okay. He's like, so if you're still here at 5, we have to charge. I was like, okay. He signs you up as a guy who doesn't

have $10. Cut to me gulping down half a martini at $4.59 getting the hell out of there. Actually, I had an engagement. I had to go see Metallica play in Central Park. Sure. Soon after that, meet

La Cougine. Yeah, you met Coug. Yeah, what a night. So at Ben Women's Bar, they've got a martini section, selection. And I had, so I'm looking at now, it was called the Eartha. Eartha Kit. The word Earth with an A at the end. Oh yeah, maybe that is Eartha Kit. Okay, so they got Elaine's something, Madeline's Vesper.

All right. It's the only Eartha I know. So now this one, it was gin infused with pink peppercorns, noily prat? I don't know what that means. Oh, that's my shitty vermouth. Oh. I think. And then sea salt and fresh fennel.

And it had that pepper and salt and pepper and like fennel. It was like a spicy little drink, but not spice, like a, like, um. Was the spice nice? The spice was nice. It was nice. It was strong. It was strong, both boozy wise and just like. Now, let me ask you about this fennel,

because I like salt and pepper and I like fennel when it's in like sausage and stuff, but did it have a black licoricey flavor to it no it was it was more the pepper because i was at the restaurant at the roosevelt hotel this weekend got a martini that i thought sounded good and had fennel in it and then i came and i could even see the fennel i was like this is exciting then you take a sip tastes like every fucking black licorice goddamn liqueur and it's the fresh stuff tim that's good you you had a good experience yeah but it it had a fennel liqueur in it as well i i it tasted like

jagermeister no this didn't have this didn't have that far of a fennel taste to me tim was the bowling alley open the spare room the spare room was closed this i went to the one it's called like the not the breslin that's in new york but the the bamford the branson the boozer the bruiser the tea man so well this experience at bemmelman's gave me a little bit of a aha moment where oh when i go out into these bars like a lot of times if there's a martini menu, I'll go, just give me the martini. Like the regular martini that I'm telling you how to make. But this made me think, oh, when you're at a good place that does cocktails well, try out their fun, their drinks.

You know, if it's a gin-based martini, let them add some funk to it. Go on that ride if you're in good hands. Going back to this appletini and lemon drop, I'll give it a shot. I will give it a shot. Wow, that's nice of you. That's nice. Mike, did you

have any of the nuts or snackies at Bemelins when they put a little dish of nuts in front of you? Yes, yes. I had as much as I could before I had to pay $10. Filled your pockets. You know, also, what I like, how it took place in that room, you see in the Bill Murray Christmas Netflix special, when they're singing the Pogues song, Fairytale of New York,

Christmas Netflix special when they're singing the Pogues song, Fairytale of New York, which I want to say on the Sloppy Boys blowout on Patreon, one best Christmas song. Is that possible? Maybe. I don't recall. I thought best Christmas song was like your, your Auld Lang Syne.

For old. Oh yeah. My, my cover of. For Auld Lang Syne. Well, I was just going to say, I've never really thought too much

about uh phoenix the band you know we got never got too red not they're not bad or anything i saw them live the hollywood bowl go ahead whoa uh but when those guys are singing uh it helps looking at them because they're french you know i like looking at a frenchman and then they're singing with uh jen Paul Schaefer. It's a very nice moment. You know, the whole time I was there at Bellman's, I was like, this has been in a fucking thing. What is this from? I know it from somewhere.

And then all of a sudden, another aha moment. I grabbed the bartender by the lapels. I said, Bellmary's Christmas, you fool. He couldn't get home. He couldn't get home. That's not it. He was staying. He was having a party at the hotel. Other people couldn't come home. He couldn't get home. That's not it. He was staying. He was having a party at the hotel.

Other people couldn't come to the party. It didn't matter to the bartender. He didn't want me touching him. Yeah, he didn't want his collar to be crumpled. Bemelmans was also in an episode of High Fidelity on Hulu, which I did not like. I didn't see. Just in case anyone who's listening worked on the show.

I want to make sure that they know that. Close those doors. Yeah. The Kravitz family. I only have room for one artist in the Kravitz family, and it is Lenny. Leonard himself. Leonard. Leonard.

Remember when his pants split open? Of course. Who could forget? Oh, Leonard. What are you doing? Where did Woody Allen played clarinet someplace every Monday night for decades. I think it was there.

It's not Bemelman's. What? Well, it was at that... It's at the Carlisle. Bemelman's is in the Carlisle Hotel, but I assume that's where he did his thing. I always thought it was at the Carlisle, but did they also have a jazz club there,

or was he at Bemelman's? I'm not sure. I just went to the Bemelman's. Well, that's life. You don't always get to know the things you want to know. Nope. Well, is that it for Booze News?

Wrap it up. Wrapped. Love it. Oh. How would you guys like to talk about the drink of the day? Oh, I can't wait. I would love it. It would be fine.

At this moment, it would be fine. It wouldn't be prudent at this juncture. No, I can't wait. I would love it. It would be fine. At this moment, it would be fine. It wouldn't be prudent at this juncture. No, it would be. Oh, it would be prudent at this juncture. It would be prudent juncture-wise now. Slow gin fizz you've had? Never had. No.

I've heard. You've heard? Yes. Mike, you heard? I've heard in the Loretta Lynn song, Portland, Oregon, which I told you about last time we dealt with Slow Gin. But you didn't listen to me then. I'm sure you're not listening to me now. Was that produced by Jack White?

Yes. That's right. And he sings on it too. That's wild. A good song. Let me paint a little picture for you guys, okay? Sure. Well, young Timmy K is a 19 year old sophomore at ithaca college ithaca of course is a gorgeous place you gotta go there but on a serious note

um i'm let's see young tim he's uh what's he up to he's uh he loves weezer he loves the pixies speaking of jack white he's got a poster on his wall of elephant the album cover from um sure moist traps you know what he's he's he's big into mr show he's the head writer of an ictv show hosted by dave ferguson this is what's going on in the life of young timmy he created pizza he's resting on those laurels that's true i had a little segment called pizza time that i animated no i didn't do the animation but created a character named pizza e that was done overseas who was the other character pep pizza e and someone else i'm talking to the guy and he doesn't seem to know i think you're lucky i think you're lucky someone can remember pizza e

it was like hey pizza hey let's go to the pizza. Hey, Pizza E, you want to go to the pizzeria? And then Pizza E would be like, the pizzeria? That's too far. That's too far. But I remember his friend was like, hey, Pizza E, he kind of sounded like Butthead.

Yeah, I mean. Was it Butthead? It was like a better Beavis than Butthead. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It was more, I don't know, iconic? Yes. Yes, queen. So I'm writing really good subversive comedy on the TV network.

I'm kind of a big man on campus. Women want me. Men want me. Bad, baby. But I'm living in the Terrace 10 suite with like five guys. But at the beginning of this semester. Restaurant? Excuse me? The restaurant? terrace 10 a suite with like five guys but at the beginning of this semester restaurant excuse me the restaurant what did i say you're living in a terrace with five guys you son of a bitch continue you knew he was gonna go there man when i when you

when you said restaurant i was worried I had said restaurant instead of dorm. Okay. Yes. One of the guys is my friend Joe. You guys know him. He comes back from a summer in Connecticut and says, hey, I went to bartending school and I became a bartender. I've been tending a bar.

Now I own a full bar of bottles and I brought the leftover stuff here to your, our sweet terrace T10 on the Ithaca campus. So we're very excited because we're 19. We're underage. Liquor is still sort of hard to come by. Although, you know, my hack of that semester, I remember I, I ordered, I'd get a 12 pack of bud from Rogan's, the pizza place, and they'd deliver it to me, and they wouldn't ID. That's ridiculous on a college campus.

I know. But it was very expensive, so I couldn't afford to do it too often. Okay, but Joe shows us all the bottles he's brought back. And, of course, what happens when you own a full bar and you've been drinking a lot is it's all just the weirdies. You know, it's all the schnapps and the cordials, liqueurs, all the things that I'd be excited about today and that we all have on our shelves

as Sloppy Voice podcasters. Galeano, Maraschino. Please, piss spikes galore. But as a 19-year-old, I was like, what? And there's this one bottle, slow gin? It's all red and syru like what what's this and there's this one bottle slow gin it's all red and syrupy what's this and he and joe says slow gin fizz i go what slow gin fizz i'll make you a slow gin fizz now these days fizzy with it stop it these days um now i know that a fizz is a sour made with soda. And it's kind of a drink from the 1800s, got big in the early, like old timey, early 1900s drink.

We learned in our Alabama Slammer episode that a slow is a little blueberry. It's a little blueberry. Right. So slow is not a speed. No. But a berry indeed. A British berry. So gin is matthew berry he's fantastic on what we do in the shadows continue okay um okay i have to i was do this podcast anymore i'll take you back to where i was which which is this cold, this crisp Ithaca autumn.

I actually happen to remember, this is the semester we'd get together, all the guys, we'd watch Sopranos Sunday nights, live as it aired on HBO. Oh, that's fun. No spoilers. Season four. Ah, I finished season four.

I'm in five. About to meet Buscemi. We watched Sopranos a lot. We ate a lot of Domino's pizza, not because we liked it, but we got it for free because they sponsored our TV show. So I got free Domino's all the time. That happened a lot down there, huh, at Park? Yeah, if you had a project, you could get a three pizza coupon,

and we got a three pizza coupon for every week. But we would only shoot like six episodes of our show a semester. But they gave it for every week for the whole year. Damn. All the best. Me and two other guys would sit down. We would eat a whole Domino's pizza. We're just watching Sopranos and Wolfing Down the Pizza.

But what were we drinking? We were drinking throughout the semester all of joe's little weirdies right we're finishing off all the those things and then the last bottle that remained as the leaves fall and the temperature cools is the slow gin bottle and joe wasn't making us this fizzy it talked about quite frankly seems to me like joe was more preoccupied with playing hockey on a team with hanford than he was yes then he wasn't making me a cocktail so this the year ended and i i with a heavy heart i report you that if you were to ask me today about the slow gin fizz, I could say that I've heard, but I could say that I have not. Wow.

And it was all right there, right in front of you. Wow. I drank the slow gin straight in a warm cup with Cliff. We just drank the slow gin and we were like, this is sweet. And we never got to. Is it syrupy, like thick? I remember we had it for a drink recently but i didn't try it it's it's thick and i think our three slow

gins have varied a little bit but mine is red and sweet as fuck it's red too um right now this slop heads as you may have guessed we want to do this drink because we're trying to get through our slow gin because we bought it for the Alabama slammer. There's only like a quarter teaspoon in the Alabama slammer. So we got these big bottles left and this is not an IBA drink. So here is our recipe from liquor.com. Nice. Good people. One and a half ounces slow gin.

One ounce lemon juice, freshly squeezed. Three quarter ounce simple syrup club soda to top garnish lemon wedge and cherry um hold on the steps here add the slow gin lemon juice and simple syrup into a cocktail shaker with ice shake until well chilled Fill a highball glass or Collins glass with ice. And strain the contents of the shaker into the glass. Top with club soda. Garnish with lemon wedge and cherry. This is going to be a lot of lemon juice. Is this?

Yeah. That's a lot of lemon juice, isn't it? You know, it's a lot of all of them. It's good to get through that slow gin with an ounce and a half. Yeah. But then it's also a lot of lemon juice, a lot of all of them. It's good to get through that slow gin with an ounce and a half. Yeah. But then it's also a lot of lemon juice, a lot of syrup. I always assumed, like when I looked at the, or we said we were doing slow gin fizz, I said, great.

And then I assumed there would be more like a regular liquor in here. It's going to be a weird tasting thing, I think. Well, I mean, a gin fizz would be gin, lemon, sugar, soda. Yeah. We're making that, but with sticky red gin. And, you know, it just helps to top it up. I'm going to top it way up. Yeah.

I wonder if they backed off some of the simple syrup to make way for that sweet gin, because... Doot, doot, doot. Yeah, I'm going to listen to you. Go down to the distillery and listen for that song. Let me ask you two a question. When you go to the supermarket to buy cherries, where do you find them? What kind of cocktail? For cocktails?

Fresh? Anything. No, not just like in a jar. I went to the supermarket. I couldn't find it. I went up and down the aisles. Then I finally asked someone. They're like, we don't know.

I don't know where it is. Wait, for maraschinos? No, no. I was just kidding. I didn't think the supermarket would have maraschinos, so I was just going for any. I'll tell you what. I mean, I buy the fancy ones in the cocktail section, but the normal red maraschinos are often in the ice cream accoutrement with balls.

That's what I thought, too, and I couldn't find it. I couldn't find them. Yeah. Damn. I didn't have them. Did you get any at all? oh no no they didn't even have just like fresh cherries garnish this supermarket does not do cherries well i'm excited to get into it yeah baby i like a nice shaker drink too yeah let's do it to it folks we'll see you back here

after this and we're back slow gin fizzes in hand oh i fucked up It looks great. You know what I did? Lucia, yours are... Mike, yours is red. Jeff's, you're a little brown. I am red. Pink brown. My slow gin is like cough syrup.

Like, it's like that look. Hmm. I don't know. I thought I had soda and I don't. So I had to use like an, I didn't have seltzer. I used the, I had to use an Aranciata,

you know, like a, like an orange Italian soda. It's probably great. It's probably great, but it make this orange. So I dialed back a little bit of this simple syrup because I knew that Aranciata already had sugar. And I dialed back the lemon just only a one little dribble less just because I know some more citrus is going there. But that's going already had sugar. And I dialed back the lemon just to only a one little dribble less,

just because I know some more citrus is going there. But that's going to be tough. Usually I'd be like, oh, it doesn't matter. But there's so much of the drink is the club soda. Yeah. You're going to have a different drink, but you might love it. The top comment on Liquor.com, Mick Bayer says, instead of club soda and simple syrup, I prefer Red Bull.

Gives you a kick of energy. I'm a bit anal and prefer my Red Bull to be red. This worked out very well. I was going to ask you guys, of all my bubbly drinks, I had what to use. I just already used the orange thing. But I had ginger ale, Canada Dry. No.

I had a lime White claw no and i had a a british soda called like lilt and it's like a it's like a pineapple soda i think i think what you did was the best you a lot of people saying they use seltzer instead of club soda seltzer is club soda, I think, in my book. Yeah, basically. But you used a lemony bubbly. That's good. A lemony bubbly. Well, I'm going to take a sip of this thing. Okay.

Mmm. Interesting. Oh, I got way too much of the lemon in my soda. Mmm. Yeah. Oh, it has a very... It kind of tastes like a sweet tart. It's kind of a Collins over here.

Well, how, of course, it's very Collins-y, right? Oh, yeah. I mean, a gin fizz is exactly a Tom Collins. So are your little blueberries coming through at all? I don't know. My slow was tart, tart, tart. I took little sips of it. I guess I don't know what a slow tastes like on its own.

Getting a lot of juniper and a lot of just tart. I think it's a British berry that needs a lot of sugar to be sweet. This is definitely sweet. Interesting drink. It's good. It's tart. Interesting drink. It's good.

It's fine. Very refreshing, one can say. Yes. One can say that. I feel like the three of us have three different drinks right now. Yeah. I've got really fancy slow gin, but I'm basically drinking a big orange soda. It's delicious, but it's sweet.

I don't know. Maybe I should have. Do you think I should have made it with ginger ale? Ginger ale. All those things you mentioned have such distinct tastes. What about just tap water instead of soda? Yeah, blow bubbles in it for like five minutes and then do it. This is good, though.

Yeah. Yeah. Mike, yours is like cherry red. I know. It's the slow gin I have over here is bright red. It's Lloyd's. Lloyd's. Is that what it's called, Lloyd's?

I always do this. I always set my damn thing up over there, and I don't turn the label to... So when we talk about it, I can say, that's the brand. It's turned halfway away from me. Oh. Oh.

This is fine. I'm sure I'll like it as we continue. So it's more tart than it is sweet? A bit of both. Let me... That wasn't the question. I might need to take another sample. But is it doing that

thing where they come together and kind of cancel each other out and it's a nice cocktail? It tastes like... Mine tastes like a sweet tart. Damn it. I wish I could order it in a pitcher instead of a glass That's the line from the song Everyone I listened to that song

Mine tastes like an Orangina With some weird stuff in it Orangina There's not much to say about this thing There really isn't, I don't know It tastes like what it tastes like I have no context for this drink Other than that jack white's or the loretta lynn song and uh i would say this is sort of like a you know you're picturing you're you're an old timey

not like a necessarily like a flapper drink because they had a lot of other flapper drinks as well but sure in the mix pre-prohibition yeah old timey drink this is like a flapper drink because they had a lot of other flapper drinks as well. But sure, in the mix, pre-prohibition. Yeah. Old-timey drink. This is like a Mr. Burns drink. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, that's true. The amount of time that we spend complaining about the fennel drinks,

the good and plenty drinks, because that's a lot. There's a lot of cocktails out there and a lot of liqueurs out there that have the same taste. Sure. Also, a ton of tastes, a ton are just lemon juice, but you don't see me complaining. Uh-huh. You know, but it's got to be said.

There's as many lemon drinks as there are fennel star anise drinks. Yeah, yeah. But they play well with me. It's an amazing thing to find out how much an aranciata takes over a thing. I don't taste any gin here. What would you do different? I guess make it with club soda, but what would... I'm going to do

round two with ginger ale. Ooh, all right. Sure. You know what's funny? I don't know what I would change about it. It's so close to other drinks I like. Like I said, the lemon. But it's just like, I don't care about it this this drink has no identity it that's what i'm having it i think we're all all three of us having a tough time like thinking of something to say because i don't i don't know anything i don't care about this drink

i don't care oh perhaps we should have had a gin fizz first and then have a slow gin fizz so we could say, oh, it's giving berry. And you say gin fizz is basically this, but with just gin instead of the slow gin. Yeah, it's a Tom Collins. Yeah. If I ever meet Tom Collins.

Is a gin fizz on the um on the iba yes and so is the tom collins interesting yeah the iba calls the tom collins or john collins oh boy that's you know they've we've know they've had problems the whole time neither here nor there been in business hey remember for the first year of the podcast their their website just didn't work. And we still were like, yeah, well our thing is the IBA. Gotta adhere to the broken website. We're getting down to some weird drinks on that thing. No, we're reaching

the end of our journey, Mike. It's exciting. You know, all this is going in my book. Disasters in producing. Disasters. That was an utter disaster to start a podcast and say it's all built around the IBA. And then a few weeks later, they have no website. And the people that we do talk to about it, they don't even know what it is. They've never heard of it.

Yeah, yeah. And we ask bartenders about it and they're like, that's, we don't know. Yeah. No, it's your international association. Yeah, that's a joke. You guys belong to it. Yeah, you check your wallet. You probably have a card for it.

We're in the International Podcaster Association. Mm-hmm. IPA. All right, let's come back after some tweaks, and then we'll give our final thoughts. Great. And we're back with our final thoughts on the Slow Jim Fizz. Michael?

Not over again. Oh! Skipping. Sad. No, I like it. It tastes fine. I just don't think I'd ever see myself in a bar ordering. Unipping. Sad. No, I like it. It tastes fine. I just don't think I'd ever see myself in a bar ordering. Unremarkable. No. Yeah.

Not even unremarkable. Just I'm done. For round two, I was about to make it with ginger ale. But then I said, you know what? I want to taste this thing. I'm going to make it with water. Flat tap water. Wow. Cool. So it's not bubbly and fizzy which is the name of the game but i'm tasting it and i gotta say slow gin flat does yours not taste like a blueberry collins mine mine i'm getting the berry yeah i did uh i did more slow gin this time i did two full ounces

instead of an ounce and a half. Otherwise, to specs. And I am getting that blueberry, Tim. Or like black currant. Yeah, like a wild berry, like a generic berry. Yeah, I mean, I think I would probably prefer the normal gin fizz, but I ain't got no problem with a black currant cons. I guess it's all context. If I'm at a work function

or a wedding i don't want to be at and they and they have these i'm a little happier yeah right if you're like we've said this before if you're out with people they're like hey we're all getting slow gin fizzes i'd say that happens a lot i'd say okay but i'll give it this it's a good daytime drink and i like a nice high ball and and I'm for like a pink, sweet, berryish highball when it's light outside. It's fine. I'll say it's an order again, just barely. This one is a squeaker, folks. Yeah.

I don't even know if I get to say, because much like my two semesters at Terrace 10 in Ithaca, New York, I never really got to have a real slow gin fizz. God, you just can't get your hands on a slow gin fizz. Your white whale. You have to order again. It's one of those things that's just not meant to be. People are like, hey, who's that time-honored soap opera star who never won an Emmy? Oh, yeah.

I know who you're talking about. Susan Collins. Susan Lucci. People loved Susan Lucci, even though she never got that Emmy. People love me, even though I've never had a slow jam. You never got that Emmy, either. I got a chain. That's true. Just like the a chain. That's true.

Yeah, just like the luch. That's true. I bet the luch gots a chain. Well, we've talked about the slow gin fizz and we had our drinks and that was all very fun. But what would you guys say now to, Jeff, put some low bass on my,

like slow it down. The slow Quiz. Oh, I would say yes. It's a quiz about things that are slow, basically. Got to find, here we go. I just blurred them out. Just blurred them out. Los Angeles is known for some,

Just blurt them out. Los Angeles is known for some... Los Angeles is known to some automobilists for its slow traffic. Name one of three cars I owned in LA. Acura Integra. That's right. That's right. Damn. That was the big one.

That was a good car. That's the one that got stolen twice. It got broken into twice and stolen outright once. And then you got called from the cops like, hey, is this Michael Hanford? We've recovered your vehicle. And you went to get it, and the seats were taken out. It was like stripped. Everything was taken out of the inside, but the seats especially.

And I had to, when the towing guy got it there, I had to tow it up on the back because all the tires were taken off, but then replaced with shabbier tires. Oh, interesting. Yeah, so they stripped it and then sent it back out in the world. Anyway, I had to drive it up onto the tow truck, and he's like, well, what are you going to sit on? And he brought a little bucket for me, so I was sitting on a bucket in the car, and I started laughing. And he was like, no. When I first got there, I started laughing started laughing and he was like no when i first got there i started laughing and the cop was like what's so funny i was like oh it's funny to see a

car with no seats on the inside you see you see don't you see all right all right now i got one jeff has one yes chevy corsica that's right that my first car. It had a blood red interior. Very beautiful gray car, blood red interior, big dent on the door given to you by your granny Gracie. That's right. That's right. Who you met once. Yeah. And my final car was a Mazda 3.

That was a nice speedy little car. I like that. Oh, wait a second. I was picturing the Mazda 3 when you were talking about the impreza integra integra it was like oh this is a black black mazda yeah black mazda and then a blue acura that's the one that got stolen all the time yeah similar three similar cars it was a dark it was a dark blue but it almost had like almost a purple. It was kind of cool. All right. Now, Mike, you've had three cars in LA. Now you're in New York taking public transportation.

I've had a Chrysler LeBaron. Then I had a Honda Civic. Now I have a T-Bird. All the while, Jeff Dutton has driven the Mazda 6 the whole time. He got a brand new. He drove it out to LA. And boy, that thing's a tank. That's going to be my car until I die.

I'm keeping that thing running. Yeah, you're going to die in that car pretty soon if you don't change the car. Yes. Like we talked about last time, that you need to keep the car on top of the wheels. Yeah. All right, we're getting way off topic here.

The slow quiz. Here we go. This fish song is titled after a slow tree climbing rainforest dwelling mammal. Frog. The sloth. Jeff. Very nice. Did you say frog, Tim?

Yeah, but I should have said koala. You'd still be wrong. Jeff, as far as I can tell, you're really crushing the slow quiz. Oh, yeah. Here we go. But I had the Chevy Corsica. What noted guitarist is also known as... Eric Clapton.

...Slowhand? Oh, shit, you're right. Eric Clapton. It is Eric Clapton. Tim got Claptonino. All right. Now, why did. Eric Clapton. It is Eric Clapton. Tim got Claptonino. All right. Now, why did you say Claptonino? Because I had said Clapton already, and you want to kind of...

Give him something new, Tim. Give him something new. Something new. Doesn't matter what the thing is, just new? Just new stuff all the time. Gotta be new. Now, do you know why they call him Slowhand? Ironically,

because he's a fast-fingered man. No, that's what I thought it was, but one website I saw was when he used to play for the Yardbirds and he'd break a string, he'd replace the string there on stage, and the audience would slow clap for him, which was also known as giving someone the Slow Hand. I don't believe

that. That's weird. During our West Coast blowout tour, what Clapton album did I think would be funny to listen to in the van? Riding with the King. Ooh. Jeff got it because it was unplugged, but we did talk about Riding with the King as well.

Fuck! Yeah, we never did it, but I think it would have been funny if the three of us were cruising down the five listening to I know that album well. The light clapping. That is some 90s dad shit. Right, your dad used to listen to it, right?

Jeff, it's three to one here. And I think a seven, nine question quiz. Okay. Okay. Okay. Oh, here's another question. Hair can grow quite slowly. I'm sure you would agree. Yes.

This notable long-haired diva once sang the lyrics, if I could turn back time, if I could find a way. It is Cher. Tim. Hair can Cher. Tim. Hair can grow quite slowly. Don't you agree? And Cher has long hair. That's how you got to Cher.

Okay. That's how you get to Cher. Yeah, because her hair. I mean, she has long hair. It must have taken a long time to grow that out. Imagine growing that long, beautiful black hair, that silky black hair that she has. It would be a slow process. Yeah.

A slow process. A cocaine. That's another song, a lyric from the slow hand. Change your mind. Honey moves slowly, wouldn't you agree? Yeah, Pooh Bear. Honey moves slowly? Honey moves slowly, would you agree, Jeff?

Yes. Winnie the Pooh got his head stuck in a honey. Honey is also the favorite food of Pooh Bear. Yes. Yes. Yes. Name Winnie the Pooh got his head stuck in a honeydew. Honey is also the favorite food of Pooh Bear. Yes. Yes. Yes. Name Winnie the Pooh's human friend. Christopher Robin.

Oh, that is a dead tie. That is a dead tie. On my end, it sounded like me, but, you know, with technicals and that Pooh's. Coming from me, the moderator, it was, I thought it was like, man, it was close. It was a tie. Nice nice it was definitely a tie so it's still three to two jeff you were in the yeah i'm enjoying the lead uh you know for the first time in a long time on the quiz here's another question name the 2013 3d animated sports comedy movie named after the snail title character. Bolt. No.

Turbo. That's a duck. Turbo it is for Jeff. Turbo it is. A snail film. But that's what I looked it up on Wikipedia, and that was the description. The 2013 3D animated sports comedy movie. It's about a snail who lives in Los Angeles who gets it in his mind that he wants to win the Daytona 500.

But he's got to get there. Man, I'm telling you, I can't see how in any world that could happen. But what do I know? Next question. It is four to two. I know next question. It is four to two. Uh, I should say that this next question is worth two points.

See, I knew it. Yeah. This is the thing with a slow point. Yeah. The second to last is always worth two. I knew it was too early to celebrate. Which of Tim's hated celebs plays the title role in turbo?

Ryan Reynolds. Ryan Reynolds. Ryan Reynolds, Jeff. Oh. I was thinking John Cena. You got two for that. Two for that. Damn. Now, this is the last one.

This one has no bonus points. This is just a one-point question, but it is played for... Here's the thing, though though, this last one. Win or take all on this one. Whoa! I know, it's one of those. After all my hard work? Yeah, it didn't really matter in the end.

I should have just done this one, but anyway. In what year was Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2 released? 91. Damn, Tim wins the whole thing. Yeah. 1991, just a year earlier, Regular Turtles was out. Get out of here.

I know. 91. They turned that thing around fast. I would not have... Yeah, fast because it's so funny because it's a slow quiz, but it's a quick turnaround. But Turtles are slow,

so that's why they got into it. Okay. Well, they probably didn't even know about the slow quiz when they were making the movie. This quiz has been out forever. This is heartbreaking to me. I was ahead for the first time in so many quizzes and I got the Ninja Turtles question

wrong. It should be a lesson for you Jeff. You gotta get into geek shit man. It's great. I didn't even think of the Ninja Turtles. You love Ninja Turtles and you couldn't get the last Ninja Turtle question, and you lost the whole quiz. Well, that's too bad. Hey, do any of my accrued points

count for next time? Yeah, they carry over until the next time we do the slow quiz. The slow quiz. Boy, I hope we do the slow quiz every week. Yeah, maybe in the next year or two. Yeah, next time we use slow gin fizz,

I bet there'll be another slow quiz with the same question. Slow gin, a liquor that we seem to not like at all. We cannot get rid of this stuff. That's our show. Follow us on social media at The Sloppy Boys, where we release these recipes ahead of time. If you want to get on the ground floor, get to the supermarket, and get the slow gin.

Also, check us out on Patreon. We can unlock The Sloppy Boys Blowout, our weekly bonus episode where we talk about fun Halloween shit. Talking about the scariest movie. We got a bunch of spooky stuff lined up, but you got to be behind the paywall to listen. And it ain't just bobbing for apples. Good episode, guys.

Hey, yeah, really good episode. Congratulations to you both. Yeah, I have an idea on how to end it in style nice oh you know the sloppy boys song santa anna wins off our second album dancing on the wind of course well super slop head dan padley who's a wonderful guitar player has put out a cover of the song and i think it would be classy for us to end the episode by listening to Padley's version of our song. Tim, I would love that. Mike?

You know, he played in New York and I was going to go and then I got COVID and I didn't go. Well, now's your chance to listen to him. It's very good. I just listened to it and it kind of made me cry. Is it credited to Dan Padley or does he have a band credited credited um it's credited yeah it's just him oh great well folks wait padley i don't know that i'm talking out of my ass should i look into it yes i'm reading sure i'm sure he doesn't mention so let's just say it's Dan Padley alright folks

we leave you with Dan Padley's cover of Santa Anna Wins goodbye goodbye Thank you. guitar solo Thank you. Thank you.