The Sloppy Boys - 135. Mary Pickford

Episode Date: May 19, 2023

The guys shake up a pineappley Prohibition-era cocktail named for a star of the silver screen.1.5oz/45ml White Rum1.5oz/45ml Pineapple Juice.25oz/7.5ml Maraschino Liqueur.17oz/5ml Grenadine SyrupPour all ingredients into a cocktail shaker, shake well with ice and strain into a chilled cocktail glass.Recipe via the International Bartenders Association (https://www.iba-world.com/) Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hey folks, welcome to the Sloppy Boys where we take a deep dive into the drinks that you love. I'm Jeff Dutton along with Mike Hanford. Hello! And Tim Kopakis. What is up? Oh, and spring has sprung. Finally. It's about time, and spring has sprung. Finally. It's about time.

It's finally sprung. Spring, the warmest season. It really is. Now, let me ask you guys something. Well, I don't know if you guys just saw me do this, but... Tim, you don't wear glasses. Jeff, you wear glasses occasionally, but mostly contact. I don't wear glasses, but I squint.

My optometrist told me to squint. Your vision gets better. My optometrist told me to squint. He told you to squint? Yeah, I can see perfectly when I squint. Oh, you look like an actor now. You look like a De Niro. Hey, how great to meet you. I'm James Dean.

James Dean was such an Elvis ripoff. Yeah. Hey, I'm James Dean. I'm James Dean. How? I got some Elvis news for you too in a second. But what I just did. What, he ate another peanut butter and fucking banana sandwich? The guy

loved that stuff. I just grabbed for my glasses to adjust them, but I'm not wearing my glasses. Yeah, I saw you pinching at the air saying, what's going on? But I don't know, what am I doing over here is my big question. Now,

Yes? Elvis. Yes. I went to a record store the other day. I told you guys I got a record player, right? But I don't have any records. Vinyl. Warm analog tones. I was at a used vinyl coffee slash coffee shop the other day. I't drink coffee but i went in

and i said all right i need a record here i found an elvis elvis live from hawaii in like 72 but the front of the thing is so funny maybe i'll show it to you later because it's out of reach it's like a picture of elvis in space and the whole thing is like Elvis from Hawaii via satellite so the front of the album cover is advertising that it was a satellite I don't understand what because by the 70s Hawaii isn't

exotic anymore but satellites now that's worth putting on the cover but it's like from satellite on record I don't get it it's so funny I think the TV performance was on satellite. Yeah. That's so funny that the technology was such a big idea to then have it be like space. It's like it's whenever a technology is new and you talk about it too much.

Like right now we're like AI is kind of funny. And you're like, yeah, well, in the two months it'll just be a normal part of life. But right now it's a fun novelty ai the movie folks if you want to know more about ai if you want to know more about the movie ai and the technology ai plug it baby head on over to the sloppy boys patreon we got the blowout happening oh every week And we talked about, a few weeks ago, we talked about AI. We had an in-depth convo. Yes. And if you'd like more information about the film AI,

you're going to want to contact Haley Joel Osment. He's got on-set stories for you. Sure. And on that episode, we had three AI experts join us. And I'm talking, of course, about Jeff Dutt and Tim Cowbags. We were the experts that day. Yes. Yeah, yeah.

Culture vultures. Had to be. We had to be. It was against all odds. We talked about AI for an hour. Well, because look, we're musicians first and foremost. Yes. We don't care about podcasts, especially not this podcast.

Maybe the blowout. Maybe. But we're sitting here on the precipice of the cutting edge of pop culture saying what does ai have to do with me right and what people don't realize is that ai will have major um implications and impact upon the way in which society, quite frankly, functions. I like when Tim is talking that way. He says impact in a different, he stresses the different syllables. It's nice.

You know that he's getting down to it. Right, but when I'm talking about my colon, it's impacted. Oh, that's for a different blowout. Yeah. Hey, speaking of blowout. Speaking of new stuff. Yeah. This isn't booze news.

It doesn't warrant a segment. But I came up with a new slang term. Oh. You want to hear it? Whoa, yeah. Tim, ask me what I think of your shirt. Hey, Jeff, what do you think of my shirt? Oh, it's great, man.

That's the boss's dog. Like boss's daughter? The boss's dog. Dog. Oh. Okay. All right. That's the boss's dog like boss's daughter the boss's dog dog oh okay all right let's okay that's for the summer let's get that going oh man this pool party is the boss's dog jeeves yeah you see that movie start calling your friends jeeves now i saw it that's the boss's dog oh yeah did you see gardens of galaxy 3 i haven't seen it yet what did you think it's the boss it's the boss's dog what'd you think is it anybody's dog is it anyone's dog so then if let's say your your boss happened to be john arbuckle you just say od or what yeah oh that's gonna be the next like when when rappers kind of take that and switch

it around a little bit then it's gonna going to be like something, something. Oh, that was just Odie. Yeah. And then people, an ODB will probably say Odie, you know, that could be good. Jeff, you had a different phrase.

You tossed off. Left-hand grab. Ooh, I made a left-hand grab. What was that again? That's like an unexpected move. Ah, yes.

Would you be like, you know, Jeff was hitting on this one woman all night, but then right at the end of the night, made a left-hand grab. He went home with a brunette. And she raw-dogged him all.

Oh, no, come on. Pegging and pegging and pegging him without a condom. Oh, Jesus. Oosh. Well, we've gone off the rails in record time. Okay, Jesus. Oosh. Well, we've gone off the rails in record time. Okay, can we please get into that?

Wait a minute, wait a minute, wait a minute. We're not all done with our shit chats yet. Yeah, I haven't even talked about that. Look what I'm eating. Zaps, hotter and hot jalapeno potato chips. Ooh, hotter and hot? Is that how it's called? Kind of like hotter than hot, but it's hotter, apostrophe N. Hotter than hot. spelled? Kind of like hotter than hot, but it's hotter, apostrophe N.

Hotter than hot. That's kind of like, who wouldn't love that? It's kind of the same way of talking. Now, speaking of hot stuff, this leads so perfectly into what I'm about to talk about. We remember, of course, that a couple, probably a month ago on the blowout we did hot wings hot stuff hot oh yeah in our warm singulars episode yeah hot ones that's what i'm saying we got the hot ones sauces i've been playing around with that stuff i fucking made some mashed potatoes the other day cheesy mashed potatoes put a few drips of that stuff in it. Apollo? The Apollo, the

second to hottest one. The last dab one, right? Yep. It was so good. It was just enough heat. It put a little tingle in your lips on each breath. I would have never thought mashed potatoes with a little breath heat.

Because a potato is going to soak up that spice real good. All that starch, you could probably put a couple drops in there. And you don't eat much. You don't eat much. No, no, no, no. And that's good, Mike, because you're an old school potato guy. That's right.

You know? That's right. You were for a time known for your innovations. Still am. Putting a pickle in there. Apparently. It's nice to see that you're keeping the old fires burning as far as like coming up with new mashed potatoes. You got to keep the spark alive. You've been eating potatoes for a lot of years now. Yeah, Mike, how do you keep the spark?

I'm coming out with cherry Coke these days. You know what I mean? I got the classic. Now I'm, I did the diet. Now I'm doing cherry coke. I'm jumping it. Let me tell you, I ate these things. They were the boss's dog, my man. Ow. Now you see it's working. Get it out there.

All right. Now, can we finally get to Boo's News? Yes. Bip, bip, bip, bip, bip, hit it. Ooh. Baby. Yep. Pavement. Yep.

Stocking. Cut less hair. New summer do. Why are you doing more of your job than I want? More of your job than I want. More than I want to pay for. Every time I get a haircut, I say, Oh, man.

Wow. Oh, oh, cut less hair was sent to us by the great Zach Mack, a.k.a. the ghost of Craig T. Nelson on Instagram. Oh, yeah. And if you have a booze news theme, email it to the sloppyboyspodcast at gmail.com. Damn. Pavement parody. He knows all the apps, huh?

Yep. Yeah, he's the king. That, without having all the Booze News submissions in front of me, that's the best one we've ever had. Damn. Wow. That was so good. When it gets to Booze news, that's very good.

But just like hearing that from... I love that song, and I love Pavement. So just hearing Tim's voice prattling on about... Cut less hair. Hair cut! I was summer, too! This, of course, was my rant about folks. Barbers, when someone says they want a subtle snip, give them a subtle snip.

Don't go chopping all their hair off. Same thing goes for Marvel movie executives. Make less film. We want a short film. Here's one for you. Here's one for you, Craig T. Nelson. Don't go chopping my hair. I won't go chopping your head.

Do that. Do something with that now. Yep. They all have to be hair themed now. We need to say things more that are just close enough to lyrics of songs that people can yeah just bait people yeah hey you know what i heard was that uh is this you know the the uh video of uh drake on snl doing no was it snl no uh hotline bling that was his video yeah that's trump did it on snl trump did it on snl that's

what i was thinking of the reason trump did it very well he's funny sure sure a very funny dance i heard that drake was meme baiting with that video he had like solid color backdrops and was doing a lot of like funny points and funny dances and funny gestures hoping that the internet would like put things in his hands and look at things and it worked yeah the one the kind of yes no meme took off and i mean then then he kind of flat out did uh uh 2c slide was like just a flat on tiktok trend so this guy is he's definitely got a cell phone because he seems like the type of guy he's probably looking at his mobile and learning all about the memes yeah he's definitely got a cell phone yeah well you used to call me on my cell phone

oh maybe so maybe he doesn't have it anymore then right or maybe she doesn't she still makes the late night booty calls but he just doesn't have a phone anymore. You'll have to dial up my landline. I told you this before. I got my Dave & Buster's pen, by the way. I'm sort of using that. Is that the one you won? I won this. Did you win it?

I won the tickets, the tokens that would then allow me to purchase this at the Dave & Buster's toy store. My theory, I've said this out loud before, is he had that one album called Scorpion. Scorpion. I bet he picked an emoji. He saw Scorpion's emoji. It's not a

super used emoji. He probably was like, alright, this would be a way to get things going with that. This guy has a mobile. This is a mobile owner. Now, it's smart of Drake to pick his emoji, right? Yes. Because I remember around then, people were using the snake for Taylor.

Oh, yeah. Remember? And it was like, no, I'm not a snake. Don't use that. Whereas Drake says, huh, I picked one out for you. It's a scorpion. Wait, didn't she, the snake was like part of her tour or like her aesthetic for a tour. She might've embraced it. I think people were saying when, remember when Kanye was like, oh yeah, here's the video

of us talking about how I could say your name in my song. Yeah. Oh. And people were saying like, maybe Kanye's the good guy and Taylor's the snake. People were also calling Elizabeth Warren a snake, right? Remember that snake emoji going in all of her tweets. You don't want to do anything too slithery, folks. Otherwise, your reply guys are going to turn quite amphibious,

will they not? Like that long reptile, the snake. I guess snakes are not amphibious. I guess snakes aren't amphibious after all. And give me this. Certain snakes have quite a few amphibious tendencies. Yes, yes. Be it freshwater or salt,

there are snakes that swim in the water sure now a true amphibian is going to be a frog frog that's right is a toad he is too well toad is 32 anyway

you guys ready for some booze news yes please okay so summer is coming, is it not? It is. We're now in spring, the warmest season, but we're soon coming to an even warmer season, summer. The warmest season. But there's one warmer. But there's one warmer, is there not?

And so basically, we've recently had a bunch of new hard beverages drop i'm talking about you know either canned or bottled malty beverages in the in the on the trend of this of the decade so far and uh i'm gonna i thought i would gamify this one so maybe it'll go utterly viral um i'm gonna tell you three brand new hard beverages oh recently dropped buzzy bevs and i want you guys to tell me which of these three would you be most likely to buy and taste which one if you're thinking you're thinking picture yourself summer 2023 you're wearing i'm there man what's that i'm there my man he's there he's there my man i'm there too okay you're you're? I'm there, my man. He's there. He's there, my man. I'm there, too.

Okay, you're wearing your summer swimsuit that you haven't even purchased yet. You got your new summer do that you haven't even snipped yet. Which of these do you want to be chilling with poolside? Bojangles hard sweet tea. Bojangles is a big fast food chain in the South. Oh, okay. Haritos Hard Sodas. The Mexican soda brand has come out with their hard sodas.

Attractive. And the third one is Bud Light Chilada Tahin with that beloved limey chili powder that we all love to crunch. Now, is Tahin a brand name? Yes. Oh, good. So this is a brand collab. Wow. Good for them. These, by the way, Bojangles, our friend Dylan from Dear Blanca told us about

Bojangles, and then Haritos came to us from Pumpkin Seed Chain, and Bud Light Chalotting came from Costco Hypebeast. Thanks to the slop heads for keeping me abreast of the stuff. Now, Timmy, can I throw a fourth one at you? Fuck yes.

Here comes a new challenger. Do-do-do-do-do-do-do. Simply spiked. Oh, simply like the spiked. Simply the lemonade. Simply the juice has come out with simply spiked lemonade. Now, I would like it if it wasn't single serving. If it's in the simply lemonade jug, that's intriguing to me.

No. Fuck my whole life. Nope. What were the flavors of those other ones, Tim? The Hornitos and the... The Haritos. Haritos. We call them the Cantoritos.

I'm looking at Fruit Punch, Mandarin, Pineapple, and Tamarind. Okay. I love Haritos Tamarind. That's very interesting, too. what for me personally so i'm not a sweet tea guy i i didn't grow up in the south so sweet tea is simply too sweet for me um and i love tahin love it and i loved my micheladas and stuff but you know uh it's that red um it's like the red crunchy salt that's on on some micheladas and right and do not like it's chili okay but uh for me i think the fact that they uh they include some dude i was gonna condemn them for for not including tamarind but they did so i'm gonna that's what my my vote is what is the

you gotta go for that one because also it's a variety pack yep i'm going for that fruit punch it's in the glass bottle too that's nice give me that punch i'll take that punch that was her haritos yeah that's how i say it could be right they. They make Minaragua also, right? That's their Topo Chico? That's the Minaragua. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Haritos brand.

Ooh, that's a good water. There's also a good Mexican soda that's like a sangria soda, but it is non-alcoholic, but that could be boozed right up. Ooh, and Timmy, you made the point the other day that we haven't covered sangria on the pod. I know. I was at a Spanish restaurant drinking sangria, and I said, why can't these guys get their act together? Why can't Mike and Jeff get their act together and have sangria on the pod? I don't like sangria. I don't think I like alcoholic drinks anymore.

You're mentioning all these, and I'm like, disgusting, disgusting. Well, maybe you don't like well yeah i understand these ones i'm offering you are all like these kind of sweet malt beverages you don't have to get revved up about those but sangria michael on ice gets a little melty that's red wine with fruit in it right yes michael all right i'll give it a shot i mean it all it is? I mean, it can be all, much like a Pim's Cup. You can go nuts with it. But at its core, it is red wine with fruit in it. Lots of people add sugar.

Lots of people add some other booze to it. They can make a good sangria at El Cid here in LA where we've played a bunch of times. Nice little, you just got to get it on ice because it's very sweet. Put kiwi in that. How about this? Would it be weird? You tell me. Tell me if it's weird.

Get yourself some rainbow sherbet. Throw that in there. Man, I haven't had rainbow sherbet. That's cold and fruity, isn't it? Okay. I used to have that shit all the time when I was a kid and i haven't touched it in three full decades i feel like i used to see punches all the time with blobs of weird sherbet floating around really yeah everybody say i want the blob no me first i'll have blob hey you know what i had recently uh that was most excellent was a an affogato which is a espresso

over uh vanilla ice cream oh most delicious hot meets cold hot meets cold and when they come together they're as warm as a spring season and it's it's an? No, but let's say if I were to reach for the Kahlua or perhaps the Di Serrano. Yeah, you know. Oh, man. I was having dinner at Mario's Italian restaurant in Lake George, New York. And I said, you know what? I'll have a – I said, you guys got a full bar? And they said, yeah.

And I said, I'll have a Di Serrano on the rocks. And I said Amaretto on the rocks and uh well i said amaretto on the rocks and happened to be disarro but they poured me just a huge gobble like a four ounce pour it was so great it's like i was having dessert with my meal with my linguine and claims not to mention the clams casino and the fried calamari appetizer. Calamari. Not so sorry. I'll take some. Dr. Caligari.

I went to, I was at a steakhouse last night in New York City. Which one? It was called the Strip House. Oh, baby. Love that place. And I had a martini, gin martini. And the waitress brought over the chilled glass and then had it in a tiny shaker and poured it. But right before she

did it, she just set the glass down and said, oh, I ordered a martini, not just the glass. And we all had a laugh and then she poured it in and then I'm sure she's spitting my food. Because you made her look like an idiot. It was early. There wasn't a lot of people around. had a laugh we all laughed yes sure have you ever seen this move i just had this recently i was eating at um houston's out in pasadena beautiful restaurant it's a chain it's a part of the

hillstone family but it's a fantastic restaurant i'm drinking a martini i'm about halfway down and the waitress just offers like they do this all the time uh she walks over with like a glass straight out of the freezer and was like would you like like a new glass and i was like yeah and she poured the second half of my warm martini into a nice new frosty glass there you go back down to freezing back to life that's nice attention to detail and i turned to to it and I said, lady, you're a hell of a gal. Now those

martinis, when they're around me, there's no time for it to get warm. It is gone. Here you go, Mr. Hanford. Here's your second one, Mr. Hanford. Sure. And I bet you the steak in your belly is thinking, oh, I'm safe down here. I'm alone down here. I'm no. I'm alone down here.

I'm safe. Oh, yeah? Look out below. Ching! Here comes the martini. Flying down the tube. Buzz sawed right through. Piercing through the meat.

Well, this doesn't even give me a chance. I haven't even ordered yet. I'm three martinis. I'm under the table. I don't even order anything. I just hold up a crinkly 50 bill and they take it i roll out of there i will just cover it oh oh did we all say haritos we all said haritos yes it's official i'm gonna try that bud light gelato tahini on the side as

but uh i could do it, just do it straight up. You don't have to be so true. Well, we've kind of stopped doing these, the seltzers and stuff on the pod. But if we're all interested in Haritos, it could be worth doing. Just saying. That could be good.

I mean, well, it's better that than Bud Light. But here's what's even more fun. What if you got a normal Haritos, took a sip, poured in tequila, and did a walkie-talkie, popo, no, no, no. Mm-hmm. Yeah, that's much better. that's a good summer drink oh one of the warmer seasons of the year warmer than winter summer it's warmer than winter you know we could also do check this out and maybe this is just like uh

to fuck with the format we do a special popo no no episode and we do a big shootout and nail it down to who's the best and what are our faves but we should do it on a walk we should record on yeah mobile mics yeah um how much you take a bramble ramble we take a bramble ramble with a popo no no no you gotta got to record yourself talking to an officer of the law while you're taking sips. He's like, hey, why is your breath like vodka? Why are your pants all pissed that you're recording a podcast? So put your shirt back on. This is a Denny's.

Are you one of these slob head morons? What the fuck's up, Denny's? Anyway, I wanted to say something for real. Remember a few weeks ago on the pod i was saying i did a little bramble ramble in frog town on the la river you guys you looked at me like i was a fucking freak and then jeff did i not show you how the the beautiful river path stroll through frog town isn't it nice you're, I can show you the path. Shining, shimmering, paved.

So now all that's left is Mike is the only one looking at me like I'm nuts when I talk about this. I'm looking at the two of you like, what? These guys are going on a Frogtown bramble ramble. I think I'll stay on the opposite coast thank you very much oh tim we should shout out what was the drink we had at the frog town brewery the frozen fellow there oh yeah it was a beer it was a beer cocktail that was frozen it was delicious i simply forget i think they have two one is a sour and one is like

sort of they're like seltzer but they do them frozen style and it was when i see frozen style i'm like oh that's gonna be a sweet dessert this was nice and beery very good and and while we're shouting out frog town drinks i gotta say the michelada verde at salazar dude that was great oh salazar was great yeah man now tim you said uh you were talking about that frozen drink at frog time frog town and uh you said you were talking about that frozen drink at Frogtown. And you said you simply forget. But would you say you may be simply forget? Yes. That's when you break.

Hey. Hey. Yeah, we don't talk. That's your boss's song. That's the boss's song. That's a different. And that's the boss's song. And that's the boss's song. If I found Andy Samberg's dog's name,

then I could start using that as a cool phrase. Yeah. Oh, here's another thing in the booze news related topics. This is more of an ad than anything. I am hosting a show in New York City. If you're in New York City, come to the show. It's on May 23rd.

Oh, nice. At 8.30. Doors are at 8. It's this space called Planet Showbiz. You can find it when you get tickets. But it is...

I work... I'm a writer at the Tonight Show with Jimmy Fallon. And a bunch of the writers, past and present, are getting together to do a show and we're raising money for the Entertainment Community Fund

to help people who, as the strike goes on, the writer's strike goes on, this money helps people who are not working because of the strike, but they're not writers, if that makes sense. Anyway, we're raising money for a good cause. That's great. It's interesting because I am a writer,

but I don't identify with the entertainment community because I'm more of an art guy. Yeah, yeah. You're like, yeah, you're on your own level. Yeah. I would say guru. You've been guru status. Grow, grow, grow. Mike, where'd you say it was? Planet what? It's this new place called

Planet Showbiz. It's 212 East 52nd Street in New York. But come on out. It'll be fun. It's a big show. It's a big lineup. We got a bunch of people. It's too bad it's not Planet Fitness. They might see you there, you know?

Yeah, that's true. So, folks, if you're in New York, come to that. I want to see you there, and I want to see you laughing. Nice. Is that it for Booze News? Would you please wrap it up? Yes. That's it for Booze News.

Okay, okay. Jeff, can you put a little like flapper 1920s music under? Oh, we should do, we should say funny things like cat's pajamas and bee's knees and all the funny, we should do flapper, we should say flapper stuff. It's flapper

week here on the Booze News. The Bramble Ramble Show. It's not Booze News anymore. Well, this is news to me. Okay, folks. So is that music now playing? Yes, it's, yep. Okay, folks. It's the 1920s.

Prohibition is underway. Whoa. We got to get our booze somewhere. Hog, hog. Hog, hog. Oh, my, oh, me. It's the time of the Hollywood. Everyone loves Hollywood silent pictures.

Oh, who's that? It's old Humphrey Bogart. How are you, Humphrey? Leave me alone. Okay. Okay. Oh, look who's coming down the red carpet now. Star studded.

The floppy-shoed, thin-caned clown, Mr. Charlie Chaplin. How are you doing, Chuck? Leave me alone. Okay. Not a friendly place. Now, who's this starlit delight? It's why it's Mary Pickford,

the actress and drink of the day. Yeah. What do you say, Mary? Wow, you excited for your next picture? Go away. Okay, that wraps it up here in hollywood all right today we're talking about the wow mike that that really drew me into a time and so transportive yeah good that came to me you know what i thought about doing that

right when i said to jeff oh can you play some of that music? I said, I gotta do something here. Wow, it was so tightly scripted though. It's weird. The little laughs and things I scripted in there. We're talking today about a drink called the Mary Pickford. Now, did you guys know Mary Pickford was a screen legend?

Yeah. No. I didn't know that. Wait, did you know? What did you think she was or you just didn't hear of her i just didn't realize that i hadn't heard of her well i just knew of her because of pic fair douglas fairbanks she was married to douglas fairbanks yeah then i was called pic fair pickford fairbanks studio and united artists were sort of co-founded by her and she's one of the i'm just reading. And she's one of the, I'm just reading off Wikipedia, one of the 36 founders of the Academy of Motion Pictures and Arts,

the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences. Mary, you could have picked a better name. You joke, but United Artists Theater, where they had their big premieres, where Mary Pickford would have been, is now the Ace Hotel. Downtown? Downtown. Wow. there we go i've seen did i see a movie there maybe i saw john mulaney there once i think that podcast pp cast festival was down there yeah i've seen a couple things and i saw nanette there was a bang bang premiere down there at one point certainly hmm. Well, anyway, Mary Pickford. So she was a big star of the silent era.

I think she, I'm just reading here, five decades spanning, a career spanning five decades. She's Canadian too, Tim, just like you kind of. So she was married to a man named Fairbanks. Now I got to look up the other fucking article. Doug Fairbanks. Now I got to look up the other fucking article. Doug Fairbanks.

Yes, Tim, very good. And this drink was invented in Cuba. Okay? What? Oh, that makes sense. Mary Pickford and her husband, Doug Fairbanks, were down there shooting a movie. And I think they were with Charlie Chaplin

because he was Fairbanks, were down there shooting a movie, and I think they were with Charlie Chaplin because he was Fairbanks' friend, and a bartender named Fred Kaufman made up a drink for Mary Pickford that was sweet, but had a kick, which was like Mary Pickford's acting style

apparently. She's sweet and had a kick. Sure, that's her whole thing. Yeah, I guess. That's kind of all they have. There's's then you can read articles about it that's like but that probably didn't happen that way because there's no record of them being in cuba at that time and they never shot a movie checking the logs on that sort of thing let her have her sounds like the work of david wondridge yeah yeah but uh either way either if she was there or not, it's definitely named after her. Okay.

Or for her. That's cool that it uses Bacardi like our other Cuban drink, the Cuba Libre. Jeff, you must be a future seer because I haven't even mentioned the ingredients yet.

Oh. Oh. Jeff, are you a future seer? A future seer. I'm going to be a future seer too as well and say it's interesting to use Luxardo because that's in a Hemingway Margarito, which is Cuban. Tim, you must be a precog. Yeah. Oh, okay.

Well, let me give you the, what's going on here. The ingredients for the Mary Pickford. 45 milliliters white rum. That's the Bacardi Jeff was just talking about. 45 milliliters fresh joie de pein. That's pineapple juice for the non-French. Equal parts so far. Pretty good.

Equal parts so far. Hey, let me get, here's an impression of me. Mike, I knew, I didn't, I saw that there was joie de pein and I brought something else. Oh no. Is that that big tall yellow glass sitting next to you yes it's as yellow as the pineapple juice is it not yeah it works i guess yours is steaming though tim it's still like it's almost bubbling uh i forgot what i was gonna say oh here's a stupid here's an impression of me

half hour before we started recording oh shit i don't have pineapple juice i ran out and got pound you okay uh next 7.5 milliliters maraschino luxardo five milliliters grenadine syrup that's all the ingredients pour them into a cocktail shaker with ice shake well uh straight into a chilled cocktail glass garnish is not applicable at this time. I don't need the clutter all the time, you know? At this time. We may check back later and find out you have that big apple slice. Yeah, in the ever-evolving IBA World Internet website.

Yep. So, yeah, there you go. It's easy to make. I think it's going to be pretty good. I'm liking this a lot of pineapple juice. Sure. Could be too juicy, too flabby. I don to make. I think it's going to be pretty good. I'm liking this a lot of pineapple juice. Sure. Could be too juicy, too flabby. I don't mind.

I like it. I had to run and go get that pineapple. I was also happy to see, I thought pineapple juice would be expensive. No. You get a six pack for like five bucks of dole, not from concentrate. You know it is expensive. The little dudes. I'm dole.

You know it's expensive. Eggs near me have gone down. Butter's expensive. The little dudes. I'm dull. You know what's expensive? Eggs near me have gone down. Butter's expensive. No. What? Is this new? I don't know. I thought there was a time butter was a dollar for a stick, and now it's like, you know, eight dollars. What's your stick, dude? What's your brand?

You doing Challenge over there? Land O' Lakes. Land O' Lakes. Have you ever seen the trick, little prank thing you do with? Land O' Lakes Have you ever seen the trick Little prank thing you do at the Land O' Lakes? Yes, Tim When I was a child They don't have her on there anymore The native girl is not on there

Too many people were turning the knees into the boobs Of course I did that Of course I don't think that's why they took that image off the thing but yes i don't know if that was quite i think there was there was a brief period in the middle where they they were pictures of her and her her knees were tits all right can we go make these drinks that was i'm saying it was weird i didn't like it that it was pornographic i know we know you think it's weird i'm just saying we're we're

we're almost getting redundant you made the point like oh this is so expensive this is so expensive you know what's not that expensive is the sloppy boys patreon which saves you from having to listen to these ads yes that's true for only well actually no it is ten dollars for the ad free tier but it's worth it i would say well but that means you also get the sloppy boys blow out the best podcast in the digital realm and you also get questions for lennon the funniest podcast in the um mobile space and you get all kinds of other perks and and you get you you get access to the discord where you can be talking with slop heads and you can say hey tim here's some booze news hey hey zach mack loved

your booze news theme hey i'm hobnobbing i'm meeting people i'm having the time of my little life is there a way that a patreon person could spend even more yeah there's a tip jar. Oh, man. They could go in there, no maximum. Load her up. They could even, did we mention the stye? Folks, get in the stye. That's for the elites. That's for the elites. We won't even mention it here.

If you're an elite, you probably already know about it. Yeah. They don't really have advertisements for, you know, Rolexes in every magazine. They don't need to advertise. Sure. If you have to ask, you'll never know. Okay. And if you're sitting here listening and thinking, none of that's for me.

Well, then guess what? These ads are just for you. Hell yeah. Or just for you. Hell yeah. As women, our life stages come with unique risk factors. Like when our estrogen levels drop during menopause, causing the risk of heart disease to go up. Know your risks. Visit heartandstroke.ca now we're back mary pickford's in hand okay looks to me like you two both went with roses red grenadine yeah they're bright bright pink. That's right. Oh Tim. Mine is nasty looking.

Because I went with. Kind of a fancy grenadine. But just made it. It would have made it brown. But maybe I didn't put enough. Because this kind of just looks like. It looks like orange yellow green. I can't tell what that is.

It looks swampy. It looks like a little. Slimy. Maybe I'll have to splash some. Round two I'll splash some roses in there. Brighten it up a bit. Or just red food coloring, if you have it. Love it. This thing looks like

it's like neon, mine you can't really tell, but it's like white pink. It looks like a Cosmo. Yeah, it's very Cosmo-y. Sips. Here we go. Okay. Yeah, very, very Hemingway Luxardo-y. Merry, very, very Hemingway Luxardo-y. Merry, merry, quite contrary.

Ooh, that's pretty good. You know, I don't like the Luxardo taste very much. Overpowering. But this one, yeah, I could probably do a little less of it, but this one really doesn't overpower it as much as it does in other drinks. Mine got overpowered. I have trouble measuring in these small increments. Yeah.

Because it's all below the 10 milliliter line. I'm like, oh, what was going on down there? I know. I do, what was that? That was like 7.5. 7.5. I do like half of the small part of a Jigger. I should be using the- That would be 15, right? 7.5. I do like half of the small part of a jigger. I should be using the...

That would be 15, right? Yeah. Yeah. And I go a little less... Depending on your jigger, of course. Yes, yes. Of course. Standard American jigger.

Feels like you should... I bet like a teaspoon is probably five milliliters or something like that. I saw... Let me read this to you, you two. I was looking on liquor.com where I got the history of this drink. And it says... One and a half ounces white rum.

One and a half ounces pineapple juice. One teaspoon grenadine. Six drops maraschino liqueur. Six drops. Yeah. Six drops. How would you do drops? That sounds a little better.

You get a dropper, I guess. You get a dropper. You got to get a dropper. I think they mean like airdrops, like on an iPhone. Ooh. What if you have a PC? What if you have Android? Let me see.

This says Mac. Oh, it says, and for PC, fucking get your life together. Stop. Oh, stop. No, no, no. Do you guys ever? I'm part of the Mac Stop. Oh, stop. No, no, no. Do you guys ever? I'm part of the Mac family. You know that.

Speaking of Mac family, do any of you two ever do a funny airdrop? No. Like on a plane where you blast everybody with a funny thing? At work, I'll see who's on an airdrop and then I'll take a selfie, and I'll smile, and maybe I'll add a little text that says, like, working hard, and then I'll see who we're sitting around the writer's room table has their airdrop on. You blast them.

But there's also things like, you know, on a subway, but people will, like, at Coachella do, like, you airdrop a million nudes, you know? A million nudes? Yeah, a million nudes. It know? A million nudes? Yeah, a million nudes. It sounds like my dream porno magazine. You should become a Larry Flint type guy and start a magazine called A Million Nudes.

Hard copy magazine. Each magazine boasts a million nudes. This thing is like a phone book. There's a million tits and balls in this one. It comes out once a year. A million nudes of a million nudes this thing is like a phone book there's a million tits and balls in this one it comes out once a year a million nudes of a million dudes a million dudes and a million nudes uh wait what do you mean it goes to a million people or someone says a sends a file with a million well not a million but like you let's say you but like let's say you're let's say you're promoting a new sneaker or

something. You go to Coachella and you airdrop a promo code to people and everyone's like, I got this promo code. I got the promo for the new Jordans. Where do I pick those up? Do you have a size four?

Size four shoe? Size four shoe? Size four shoe, sir. You're seven feet tall. I know. That's why I'm always falling over. Mr. Topple. Right this way, Mr. Topple. Oh, no.

They're going to send him right next to that champagne fountain. I'm Mr. Topple. I topple around. pain fountain. I'm Mr. Topple. I topple around. Mr. Topple sounds like if someone's making a joke on a 90s era

SNL sketch, like an early 90s. It's the Topple family. It could be a good sketch. It would be very funny, and that's the type of stuff I like. You like to laugh. It kind of makes life just a little go down a little bit easier when you can laugh when you can laugh remember massive head wound harry yeah that was

good it's just uh didn't jim carrey i was gonna say jim carrey dana carvey had a uh massive head wound and he goes to a party yeah the dog's gnawing on it and stuff it's like there's blood coming out he bends over to pick something to pick something up and his head goes in the shrimp did he try on someone's hat at one point yeah yeah he's like oh no you didn't have a hat he's like whoops sorry he's like oh just keep it yeah uh oh yeah he thought he had a hat when he did um uh those late 80s uh early 90s sketches character sketches we've talked about this before how funny it is that with that they have intros because they're not sitcom parodies but it'll be like that's man who's hairy and yeah like or like irv the perv or or debbie downer

even it's like why does this this person who's in a scene is at a table with friends why did they have a catchphrase right because they weren't they weren't like sitcoms of the past right oh have you guys ever watched uh married with children not really way back in the day i just turned one on the other night i think it's on hulu i think that's where i watched it i'd never seen it before so i went to like season four and picked an episode. And it was really interesting. It was funny to me. But it's such a weird time capsule of

when Fox started and they had The Simpsons and this show. The humor is very, if you remember it, kind of cheesy, but it's funny because it's cheesy. But I don't know if it was supposed to be the time. I'm not sure. I remember it also just had cheesy but it's funny because it's cheesy but i don't know if it was supposed to be the time i'm not i'm not sure i remember it also just had like a really depraved aesthetic yeah oh yeah and it's all it all the episode i saw pretty much all just takes place

in the living room yeah like it's like they don't really it's obviously three multi-cam but there's something so funny with uh the the main guy who Who's the dad? Craig T. Nelson. Yeah. Ed Bundy? Ed Bundy. Yeah. Oh, yeah, yeah. Craig T. Nelson's coach.

He's an upstanding leader of men. Then who plays Ed Bundy? His name is... Ed Asner? No. No. Ed O... Ed O...

Ed O'Neil? Neil. Yeah. Ed O'Neil. But his character trait is so funny where he hates his wife, but he also complains that she won't have sex with him. But he can't stand the thought of having sex with her. Yeah.

It's very weird. And the brother and sister are very funny. Yeah, that's the only thing from that show that stuck in my head that really blew my mind as a kid was he wanted a magazine there's a magazine he likes it's a porn that's called big guns like uns and he's like i want to look at big guns and then there was something he his wife overheard him like oh honey you want big guns and he's like not those big guns and and it's like she's like uh pulls him behind the couch like to have sex with him and he's like no my my hot wife yeah it's very i'm gonna watch some more of them

because they're very interesting to me and um i like that fox uh what was that going to be? If you want to watch the show, watch it now. Yeah. Fox, you know, was kind of a stanky network. It started and it was like, we got Bart Simpson and Married With Children. We're not the Cosby show. They had no respect for the American family, it seemed like. Or Jeff, or Jeff, or Jeff. Were they very accurately depicting the American family?

Oh, holding up a mirror. That is what it was. Well, because everything on TV had been fucking leave it to Beaver. And then along comes Ed O'Neill. We were sick of it. We were so sick of it. Neil, friend of the pod, was telling me that that's also a thing. Like when networks have big hits lots of times

it's when the when the show fully aligns with like the branding of their network and that fox like even decades later like house was a big hit in like there were there were doctor shows and hospital shows everywhere but the big fox one was house because he was snarky you know like yeah yeah fox fox has that built-in branding and like family guy and all kinds of stuff over the years like fox is a little snide a little uh like cynical yeah like my family wouldn't have watched we would like we would have watched like wonderful world of disney and if i were watching fox i bet my parents would be like damn a that's true because i felt i grew up feeling like man i'm like a fox kid in an abc household

i think abc has the weirdest branding where like all of their single cam shows look the same and i'm like do they have to is there a color palette like if you're the dp on gray's anatomy and then you're gonna be the dp on a super fun night. Do you like, is I feel like that you're told like, this is what a, what an ABC show looks like. Like it has the same color palette. I mean the,

the TGIF, I mean, remember like step-by-step and family matters and full house. Like those all had the same aesthetic. I mean the same writers wrote half the theme songs. I feel like they're so down to the, down to the main titles. They're like. They're so down to the main titles. They're like a pattern. Downton the Abbey.

Downton the Abbey. There's something, oh, something I just learned about. In 1988, I think, when there was a writer's strike then, it was a long writer's strike. I'm sure the listener is aware that there's currently a writer's strike happening. The networks were like, oh, we got to do something without writers. And that's where Cops was born.

And Cops became... Wow. Cops ran for like 30 years or something. That's wild. Celebrity Apprentice, too, from the 2007 strike. Oh, yeah. That one I didn't know of. That's pretty wild that like trump

gave us he gave us trump and it gave us joe biden huh right i guess in turn we wouldn't have biden in the office right now if we didn't have trump you're right biden is time you're probably right um isn't it funny that the theme song from cops is reggae i was just gonna say that it's very funny yeah that seems like a uh they made that choice like because that seems like such a slapped together show like the title card is just like the word cops and white but then to be like uh okay we got the rights to this song bad boys great uh put that on and it becomes like iconic for years and years. And it sounds like the song is taking the point of view of the perp.

Of course. Yeah, when they come for you. Ethnic Jamaicans. We're on the side of the people that the cops are coming for. Not the cops. Right, right, right. Has this ever happened to you where before you hear an actual song, you hear your friends sing the song to you? Well, I've twice once was and they're both reggae songs i think i talked about the second

one the first one my friend russell clipple was like you ever you ever see cops i'm like nope he's like it's got this great theme song what you gonna do what you gonna do when they come for you so like i i then later heard the songs like that's what he was singing but i'll sometimes think of my friend russell's acapella rendition and cut to 10 years later i'm in high school no no probably probably not that many years later but i'm in freshman year high school and my friend sal defalco uh puts on a fur coat in the prop closet in the drama department. And he puts on a fancy fedora hat. And for some reason he goes, I don't practice Santeria.

I ain't got no crystal ball. I had a million dollars. I think he was singing because of I had a million. He thought of a rich guy song was I had a million dollars. But then I was like, what song is that? He's like Santeria by Sublime. And it became my favorite band of that era. I had a million dollars. But then I was like, what song is that? He's like, Santeria by Sublime. I'm like, I don't look into this, man. And it became my favorite band of that era.

Isn't that funny? Because now you think of the Sal version as the original. Like when you hear a cover song first. When I scroll through my iTunes, I have Sal version. You have the Sal version. Yeah. Well, I told you about a friend of mine. His little brother used to sing the Buddy Holly, the Weezer song.

And he'd go, I don't dress like Buddy Holly. Oh, oh, and you're Mary Tyler Molly. It doesn't sound like they're saying Molly or a word that sounds like Molly at all in the original. He's just like, I like Mary Tylerlly um how about this weird fucking thing my friend in high different friend in you know chris geary in high school he's probably the most popular guy in school you got friends all over three do the i haven't none of these friends have been established before keep never heard of these guys sal's a big one russ was a like a very good friend but early early on chris geary's more of an acquaintance but i'll be generous on the pod and call my friend but here's an odd thing

in high school he was singing come on i come on eileen and he he he's singing it it's like baseball practice and he goes don't drink don't smoke what do you do come on eileen yeah you know and i was like what the fuck and he's like yeah don't drink don't smoke what and i was like i've never heard that part of the song cut to i'm watching tv later that month and i see a compilation cd of pure 80s and it goes, goody, goody, goody, goody, two shoes. Don't drink. Don't smoke. What do you do?

And then the next song, hard cut to, come on, Eileen. Interesting. So this guy thought those two songs were the one song? He must not have been looking at the visual transition. He wasn't looking. I asked him, I said, were you looking at the visual visual transition he wasn't looking that i asked him i said were you looking at the visual transition yeah what'd he say he hasn't gotten back to me on that oh he said tim can i get back to you on that i said yeah but i'm going to talk about on a podcast in 20 years it's funny when you make a mixtape for yourself or a cd and then you get used to the transitions between like

your homemade album yeah you hear those songs like in the context of their original album like what no that's supposed to go into the sweater song yeah i had that big time but i also you mentioned sweater song blue album is one where come on you you know those transitions. Yes. Do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do. Do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do What would you change about the drink? Well, I'm going to use some roses grenadine so I get a little color in my drink for once. And I would pull back on the maraschino liqueur. Yeah. I think I'm going to do that teaspoon and six drops method. Ooh.

How about that? I love that. As we go on the break here, I'll show you the album cover of the Elvis album I was talking about. He's floating around in space there. That's so funny. Wow, they really, even in huge letters, via satellite. Elvis, aloha from Hawaii, via satellite. And, you know, I put the first disc on, the first side.

Sounds great. It's that warm tone, man. You probably get some nice crackles and pops too, huh? Well, not too much because this is, for a used record store, this had some quality merch. Crackles and pops. Crackles and pops. Hey, everybody, it's got crackles and pops. I spilled on the floor bed to grab all your mops.

Hey, that could be a good move in the pod. Imagine this. Go listen to your favorite podcast, but all the while, there's a bed of warm analog crackles and pops. Well, I've suggested we do an episode like we're sitting on a front porch, and in the summertime, you hear some crickets and stuff happening, some cars going by. Tell you what, Mike, first episode of the summer we'll do that oh that's nice at least for the intro or the here a sprinkler going off get the hell off my lawn

oh one of these that goes yeah oh jeff you take me right back pretty good you take me right back all right folks we're gonna go make these drinks You open up your wallets and open up your ears and listen to these ads. Carefully selected for each and every one of you. As women, our life stages come with unique risk factors, like high blood pressure developed during pregnancy, which can put us two times more at risk of heart disease or stroke. Know your risks. Visit heartandstroke.ca.

And we're back. Round two. Mary Pickford. Check check it out on the rocks jefferson had to do it to him he knew he was gonna do it what'd you guys do i did i switched to roses grenadine so i have a nice pink dream and uh and i scaled back the uh maraschino from 7.5 to 5. I did it using a, you know, I took out the teaspoons and found the little 2.5-er so I can nail that. And it's delicious and it's great.

It never ceases to amaze me how frothy and foamy pineapple juice gets when you... Oh, yeah. We learned that with the Singapore sling was very frothed yeah very frothed hey one of these days we got to do the chickpeas you know instead of instead of uh egg egg white they use chickpea guts chickpea juice the stuff from the can the stuff from the can the slime the slick slime you don't like the slime i don't like the slick slime yeah well what do you think of this?

What is that? What am I looking at? Oh, it's a little surfer in Maine. So rather, it's not a snow globe. It's like a snow globe, but there's no snow, and it's a little surfer in Maine. It's a surf globe. Those are fun. The surfer's standing straight up. He's got a little balancing ball at the top of his head.

Yeah. That's fun. Because when I think surfing, I think of Maine. I know. know freezing cold at rocky shores people in full body suits lobster land maybe i'll go to maine i'll go to maine this summer oh get me a lobster tim stop uh i i had a funny thought not not funny ha ha i have them all the time i'm a comedy writer. Well, this is more funny peculiar, funny insightful. Ripley's Believe It or Not.

Yeah, yeah. We've covered so many drinks that are like silver screen inspired, have we not? Oh, okay. The Godfather. The French Connect. Shirley Temple. The French Connect. The Mary Pickford.

We don't have them anymore. The movies don't have the impact on the world of drinks what about that batman one that was basically the calpe cordial okay yeah there's the um don't forget the so what was that called the batman drink yeah the batman they had a funny name and there was also the t-rex remember these were at mcguffin's bar at Yeah, those are shitty. AMC Cinemas. But I envision a world where the stars of today inspire drinks. Stars like PewDiePie and Mr. Beast. Yeah, yeah. Wouldn't that be cool?

Yeah, PewDiePie with a drink. Oh, bartender. Hey, what'll it be? Oh, I'll have a Mia Khalifa, please. Would you wrap this show up, Jeff? Wait. No. Before we wrap the show up, I googled Mary Pickford.

I googled Mary Pickford. I googled Mary Pickford and this is what I found. I was thinking, you know, it's easy to talk about an old timey lady and just say, hey, this is an old star. But I was thinking, we live in LA, at least me and Jeff say, Hey, this is an old star. But I was thinking we live in LA, or at least me and Jeff do.

Mike, you formerly did. And I, and I was like, where's, what's this lady's whole deal to put it into modern context. And I found some interesting fun facts. You're going to like ready.

And then as you rattle them off, Mike, you and I will be thinking of what's the modern day analog for Mary Pickford. Yeah. Well, first I wanted to say that I looked at her house, Pick Fair,

where she lived with Douglas Fairbanks. I wanted to see where it was. It's in Beverly Hills and it sits right behind the Beverly Hills Hotel, which you may know as where Lorne Michaels once met with Good Neighbor.

Sure. They sat in a booth and they had drinks with Lorne Michaels.els now next i googled around in the google image search i found a picture of mary pickford at the los angeles breakfast club in los feliz california in 1933 los feliz is where i eat my breakfast every day, M Drive. Yes, yes. Wait, Tim, what's that diner now? Is it something cool that we know?

It's a club. It's like these people are standing outside posing for the camera, but they're like a breakfast club. I don't know what that means. Oh, the breakfast club. Interesting. She's like holding a trophy. Also, there's like one is a jock and one is a... Stop, stop.

No, that's a chicago i love it um and then i also noticed the last thing i saw was that her tomb she has been laid to rest in a beautiful tomb at forest lawn cemetery which you can see every morning from my commute to digman i roll down lowest fields boulevard and i look out over glendale and i see forest lawn cemetery so this sounds like less of a of you know rundown of facts about mary pickford more of a let's see what tim's up to type what kind of we're just pod making a pod pod uh related yeah this is jeff this is why i say end the episodes what are we doing hold on I'm doing a little bit of research here. Oh, for crying out loud. Mary Pickford, no matches found on MrSkin.com.

That's interesting. You're an absolute nasty boy, and you're growing up to be a nasty man. Yeah, well, that would be a good through line for this whole series is Jeff is a nasty boy we all know, but we're trying to change his ways before he grows into a nasty man. It's not just me who's going to be a nasty man. On a long enough timeline, any nasty boy. Yeah, well, I don't know. Hold on.

Let me just order. I'm going to grow up some dinner. Liver and onions. He's a nasty boy. And me, I'm turning into a nasty boy over here because I'm sweating so much. That's why I want this to end because I want to turn my AC on. I'm turning my AC on now. And don't forget other notifications. You're too much, Jeff. You put me through

too much here. You put this man through hell. I just want to say the other notable nasty boys are the trickster. Sure. Slender man. Oh, yeah. Who else has come up as a nasty boy? Memory man? Memory man probably. Well, memory man can fly.

Yeah, he's not so much a nasty boy or that he could fly he's a flying man flight man that's our show follow us on social media we didn't review the drink oh my god we love it these pickfords have gotten on i love it i mean i love it i didn't have anything else i love it i'm ordering it again here mean, I love it. I didn't have anything else to say. I love it. I'm ordering it again. Here's the thing. Make it again. Do it with the tablespoon of grenadine and the six drops of the Luxardo because this is a balanced drink. The one I did before, it was half fucking pineapple juice and all I can taste is cherry sticks.

So wait, how much pineapple? It's still half and half with the Roman pineapple, though. Yeah. Half and half with the Roman pineapple. But yeah, cherry sticks take over a drink, folks. Go easy on the maraschino. What the fuck is the IBA thinking? We have to take this organization down.

We have to infiltrate. That's the Sloppy Boys movie. We infiltrate the International Bartenders Association and take them down from within. From within. I love it. One by one, we convert them into nasty boys. One by one, we convert them into nasty boys.

So we do, in that case, we do like nasty boys. Yeah. And that's good because it will cut to like the head of the IBA who's like a villain. And then she thinks she's talking to somebody she can trust. And then she turns around and he's a nasty boy. Hi, you mean to tell me I've been talking to a nasty boy? Correction, a nasty man. Wait a second. I was talking to you thinking you were a nice guy,

but then I saw you have a subscription to Mad Magazine. Nasty boy. And a small packet of liverwurst. Yes, and you collect Garbage Pail Kids trading cards. Wait a minute. What's your favorite movie? I'm reading on your bio. Your favorite movie is The Toxic Avenger?

Oh. Ah, you're a nasty man. It's like you're not even that objectionable. It's still just, you're a nasty man. It's just like, I'm dismayed. I can't believe the boy I was talking to was a nasty man. A nasty man in my employ.

My employ? The boss's dog. That's our show. Follow us on social media at The Sloppy Boys. And then go to Patreon.com and get that blowout. You're gonna want to be on the blowout. You're gonna want to hear the good show that we care about, we put a lot of work in.

You know what's so cool? This week on the blow, it felt like spring had finally sprung because we talked about that movie Spring Breakers. Yeah. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Jeff, I like the way you just did, that's our show. You went down the scale of notes.

You said, that's our show. You usually say, that's our show. You went down the scale of notes. You said, that's our show. Usually say, that's our show! Yeah, you know, give them something new. Did you like take out sheet music and recompose those notes for this episode? Yeah, I took the notes down. There's like three quarter notes. And I just went down instead of up.

Sounds like College Night by the Sloppy Boys. Ding, ding, ding. Ding, ding, ding. We're all off. We suck. Martin, Munit, Nernet, Gonzaga. Watch it. That's a good melody.

Wait, no, but what are the schools? Harvard, Dartmouth, Berkeley, Barclay, Gonzaga. Dartmouth, Berkeley, Barclay, Gonzaga, SUNY, Barnard, Bard, and Harvey Mudd. Harvey Mudd. And what about RISD? Okay. All right.

And also RISD. Do we play College Night at the end? Yes, folks, listen to our discography. We're wonderful musicians. You know, it's kind of actually kind of cool. All right, we're going to leave you with this. College Night off of album two, Dancing on the Wind. Wait, have we played College Night before? I think we played in the Borg episode sort of recently.

Yeah, I think maybe. Here, I'll give you a better one. Mary Pickford, high society lady. Let's play Little Miss Socialite. There you go. That's a good one. Little Miss Socialite. I like that one.ite. There you go. That's a good one. Little Miss Socialite. I like that one.

Great. Bye, folks. Oh, yeah. Studied at the finest schools And you suffered by the fly's booze But you haven't thought of quite everything Little Miss Socialite Oh, yeah.

Daddy's compounds and old state farts And your mama's condo's got new farts But have you even considered this? Take us with you Take us with you Take us with you Please! Little Miss Socialite

Oh yeah Here you took a trip right out to Ibiza I wasn't there No Jeff or Mike either Did you really think we wouldn't want to be there? What? Oh yeah Watched some films at a fest in Cannes

We'd have gladly driven out Northland If you'd fandangled us three tickets Take us with you, take us with you Jeez, little Miss Socialite Oh, everybody in the poker knows, knows When you go to ask in a store You got to, at the very least, put us on a Amtrak Plus we heard your education really paid off

You got your own non-profit with its own ride-offs Well, look no further, baby We're accepting donations Make us rich, too Make us rich, too. Make us rich, too. All three. Little Miss Philetropist. Yo!