The Sloppy Boys - 288. Lynchburg Lemonade

Episode Date: April 24, 2026

The guys stir up some tall, refreshing sours! Created in 1980 by Alabama lounge owner Tony Mason, the drink was later promoted by Jack Daniel’s-- and eventually became the subject of a court battle between the two.LYNCHBURG LEMONADE RECIPE:1 part JACK DANIEL'S1 part SOUR MIX 1 part TRIPLE SEC4 parts SPRITE Combine ingredients in a mason jar filled with ice and stir. Garnish with lemon slices and cherries.Recipe via Tony Mason's, Huntsville, ALWANT MORE SLOP? Check out:PatreonSHOP the webstore at:The Sloppy Boys WebsiteLISTEN to The Sloppy Boys hit songs on:Apple MusicSpotifyYoutubeTOUR DATES, SOCIALS and more at:LinktreeT H E   S L O P P Y   B O Y S   L L CExpand Ascend Conquer Retain Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hey folks, welcome to the sloppy boys, where we take a deep dive into the drinks that you love. I'm Jeff Dutton along with Mike Hanford. Hello. And Tim Calpacus? What, he's up. Oh, and where you host, The Sloppy Boys? Chalk full of timeless integrity. Now more than ever, culture starts here.

It really does. It really does. Sorry, I'm not my peppy self guys. I'm sort of just sort of realized. something here. What's the matter? A couple hours. The last couple hours, I just so realized

I ain't getting myself out to Las Vegas this April to see fish at the sphere. You've been realizing that? The last couple hours? Nobody wants to go with me. You two won't. Nobody wants to see fish at the spear?

Spear? Jeff, you always do this. You change it from sphere to spear. You get me laughing. I forget what we're talking about. No, I just don't think it's going to happen for me. I think too bad, too expensive for me. I just, this year, too expensive.

Too bad. So sad. I feel like I went with you once, fish at the sphere. I enjoyed it. And you should go with me again. It was a hell of a time. And it's just tricky. It's like to do that the second time is like, it's I already, I have the great memories, you know.

What happens if I don't like it the second time? Because the thing about the T-Man, surprising, not a Vegas guy. You might think he's a Vegas guy, but he's not. What the hell? When you were there, you were walking down the strip. Like be a lady for Timmy tonight. My hands were shaking. I was sweating bullets.

I was a fraud. I'm not really like that. Oh, okay. I thought you were, you had me fooled. I said, there goes. People were like, who is that man? I go, there's the most confident man in Vegas, ma'am. I would like to, you know, our friend Ben is out there this month off the strip.

and I was thinking I might like Fremont. I might like the old strip. Ah, yes. Ben doesn't strike me as a Vegas guy. He's not a Vegas guy, but he's a cheap Airbnb guy. Ah, yes. Off strip. Yes, off strip.

Oh, he's off strip. A lot of deals off the strip. That's your attitude towards going to a fish show again at the spear is also kind of like how you should look at gambling. If you win, go home. Take your winnings. go home. Don't bend it again. You're going to lose. You're going to lose Steve. Go home. Steve. I mean, it's always been my problem with gambling is, uh, just picture Harriet Winslow.

Tim, take it away. When she's working in the elevator on perfect strangers. A little later, a little later. How after she's met Steve. Yeah, right. Oh, Jeff and I are not on the same page here. Sorry. I just feel like, uh, the, the agony of defeat is worse than the thrill of winning. Like if I, if I lose $1,000, I'm very sad. If I win $1,000, I'm like, okay. It's just like, I mean, winning a thousand, don't get me wrong, I enjoy winning a thousand dollars, but losing a thousand dollars, that's the fucking worst thing in the world. Yeah, that's no good. That's no good. You got to keep that cash in your pocket. Although, now I'm doing the math now they are, it's the same dollar amounts either way.

And you're feeling something, so that's good. Yeah. Oh, my. God, these days, because I live in Prozac Nation and no one feels anything anymore. You know what I was thinking about, remember, you know how these days the big complaint about stand-up is like, gh, everybody, all these guys feel like they have to have like a stance on trans or a stance on like a political something. Remember, like back in the 90s, you'd hear a lot of like the same types of comedians back then would be like, oh yeah, you know, these kids are on Prozac. they just taking a pill. When I was a kid,

you get, you get to hit your head. Yeah. It hits you the head. It was great. Yeah. It's good stuff. Yeah.

It's just a funny, observation. It's a good observation. People chiming on stuff, they have no idea, but like, like the trans joke thing pissed me off so much.

I think it's lightning up now, but really like two years ago, if you were a stand-up, it was like, people thought it was obligatory where they would have just the most. I went down to Austin, and I went,

to the comedy mothership of shit. Right. That's what you were telling us about. Well, that's where you're going to find. Those are the types of comics that wanted to have to take. But at that point, it was like... That's who I mean was stand up to. It's like that like popular group. They weren't even transphobic jokes or toothy jokes or funny jokes.

It was obligatory. It was like, oh, my manager says I have to touch on this topic, you know? Yeah. But in the same way that like those Prozac jokes of the day would be like, okay, here's my take on this. idea. I don't, you know, it's probably helpful for people and I don't know anything about it. Well, I'm anti.

I'm anti-Prozac in the 90s. Anti-90s pro-sac? I'm fine with it now, but I'm you're anti-90s? I'm pissed off about 90s prozac for 90s kids. What the hell? You are a 90s kid. I'm kind of a 90s kid too. Jeff, what about you? 90s kid? Come home, maybe. Yeah, 90s kids through and through, man.

Battletoads. That was his that was your faith. What about the other, what about moo ranch or whatever you're talking recently? Cowboys of Moosa? That's behind the paywall, Tim. Oh, sharp. Don't bring that, don't bring that shit out of you.

Oh, shark. Yeah, we're talking about all types of crazy shit back there, folks. Not here. We keep it pretty on the level. Hey, did you guys take in any Coachella? Coachella happened. Oh, Tim. Yes, I tried.

I saw the Bieber. I saw the Sarbina. every year. Yeah, I didn't, I haven't really see many clips, but every year I'm like, oh yeah, this thing's happening. I should, Tim does this couch surf thing. I'm going to do, or the, you know, Coach Coach, couch. Couchella. And I try, I put it on. It's always like, okay, I don't know this band, two songs. I'm done. I'm kind of even done just looking for other bands. I'm just done. Yeah. Well, I always give up quick, but I did check it out. Um, I, I, I, uh, I enjoyed what I saw, but it was also, I had a very musicy week. Me and, me and Jeff saw. Alex Cameron and I was a great show

and then oh yeah I saw Springsteen twice and then I loved the The geese said Coachella was amazing I'm getting me excited for the sloppy boys band going out on the road The Southern streak I'm talking Atlanta Knoxville Nashville Nashville May 21st

22nd 23 Folks we're coming in we're doing this Cut this whole thing I would have fucking best What am I going to just repeat what Tim said but worse. No, better. Put a little, put a little panash on it.

Give it a little duts into it. Speaking of Dutz, geez, we got Dutz is on questions for Lennon this month. Oh, shit. Out now. Check that out. Nice get. It was a nice sit down, two musicians talking about musicianship and a number of other topics. So, folks, check that up today.

What's the number of other topics? We got up to 94, what, 94? Oh, four, just four. We should say that. We said 90 words. Instead of, you know, like a podcast, he'll say like, don't stop by to talk this, this and this. It should just be four topics.

Four topics discussed. That feels like it would have been like a bang bang show description. Like Kevin Bacon stops by and says 2,900 words. Yeah, you know what? You know, here's the thing to keep an eye out for. Much like how, you know, you walk into a restaurant, they say welcome in and I suppose

brought into the podcast I said keep your eye up. Welcome in you're thinking when we were in Switzerland. Welcome in. Here's another thing. I tracked this

15, 20 years ago and it's still happening. Let's say you're reading an interview, a print interview, Vulture or something like that, right? There's the intro paragraph before it gets into it's a type of interview

where it's like bold text and non-bold text to question answer type thing. But there's a there's a paragraph up top. Big font. Not huge. Headlines are big.

But there's one paragraph and it always ends with a sentence that's like a list of three things and the third is silly where it's like, it'll be like, Dutz stopped by to talk about his new album, touring,

and the thing he'd never know about what's on his Christmas table wish list this year. The third one is always hyper-specific. you know, and it's not what the person's promoting. And it's like, well, this is a weird musical conversation. Right, right. What could that be?

I've noticed that to, you know, with like, you'll get like alerts for YouTube videos or something. It's like, Shane Gillis hates Latin Americans or something. It's like, okay, he made a joke on his own podcast, and that's like the title for it. I get so mad at that stuff and I'm like, oh, wait, wait, wait, I shouldn't even be on this fucking phone. I shouldn't even like Yes. Having any opinion on how this stuff is reaching to it. It's like it's all bot like made.

Like I don't need to have an opinion on like, they want to get me to watch this. Oh yes. That is what the whole thing is all about. Right. It's just as mad as it's just as bad as having the outrage is to be like, I'm not going to get outraged over this. They're trying to.

All right. That's right. It's not about anything. But the words are there. Ooh, it crushes me. And it's, There's also that fucking, you see, you see those, like, videos of somebody putting something together. And, like, they never, say they're building, like, a desk or something and they're cutting and measuring stuff.

And it, like, never gets to the finished product. And you're like, oh, what? That's so stupid. They should put the end. I hate when they don't do that. I was like, oh, but I've watched the whole thing. I've been fucking idiot. I've been had for the 30th time.

I know. Oh, if you weren't so beautiful phone, I'd throw you away. Did I mention I'm on selfie mode? Stop. Well, do we get in some booze news? Bib, bib, bip, bib, bib, bib, bib, boos news, hit it. Talk of the town. Hey, what's the story with the talk of the ten?

Talk of the ten. What's the story with the talk of the ten? Talk of the ten. Hey, what's the story with the talk of the ten? What's the story with the talk of the tent? Back a model of me. Fawkes and James Farrs and James

You better Talk of the Taddle You want to hate this story With the talk of the Tess That's going out of the All right Go let it all hang out Talking

Duky Dokey What's it? Do you have the time Dude you have the time Do you have the time Boo's News Riot was sent to us By Rick Tapper

And if you have a boo's news theme email it to the Slucy Sloppy Boys podcast at gmail.com. Rick? You shouldn't have. Remember Tim today you were trying to figure out which one to be like, I can't pick between which boo's news theme. I said, Tim, just tap it in. Tap into the Tapper on the sloppy on the sloppy boys podcast.

Ooh, that's a new good, that's a good new tagline for us. Tap into the Tapper. We're not in our own tagline. Tapping to the Tapper. Sloppy Boys tap into the tap. What are Tim, Jeff and Mike. I don't know, but I love Rick Tapper. Tapper. Rick Tapper has a few seconds where he plays a song.

Amazing work. Rick Tapper, a very, very impressive set of songs you sent it. Also, it reminded me, I had an idea for a mashup and I started tinkering with it. And I found two songs that go together. Oh, so well. It's really fun. Like what? Oh, like an actual, like the way like a DJ would do. You going to bring them in?

I'll wait and I'll bring it in But here's the thing I started doing it on garage band I got to switch over to like Frutty Loops or DJ Pro or something like that Because it's um I've been doing it manually like an old dork Mm-hmm

But it's good It's I was I was singing I was playing a song on my guitar And then I started playing a different song on my guitar And I said they're the same key They're the same chords Oh my God Same cards

Okay thank you Rick Tapper Here is the booze news, guys. Well, buzz balls, buzz balls, buzz balls. It is happening. Again? Telling you. They're back. Remember.

They're back. They never really laughed. Okay. So if you've been following the pod, you know that a year ago, we were in Austin. We did a live show. We talked about Merrily Kicks invention buzz balls than it sold to the Sazerat company. company it blew up. Then amid all of these

like recent articles about how Gen Z doesn't drink, remember there was one about hey, Gen Z in the UK fucking loves buzz balls and buzz balls are keeping drinking alive over there with the Gen Z kids. Not just the Normans. No, the Normans are more into like natural wines and stuff.

Are those Aussies? It's UK. They've got Ozzie Mullets, but let me ask you guys a question. Tim, finish your thought. Then I've got to ask you about just remember, Normans. is the whole boo's news story, so you ask me the question. Now, when I said that Norman's thing, that's something we've brought up, that was on boo's news like six months ago. We've brought it up a few times.

Is that something you guys think the audience knows what we're talking about or do we need to? Because sometimes we'll say stuff and then I'll go, oh, we should probably, you know, explain what that is. But then sometimes it's like, oh, we've done this story a lot. People know what we're talking about. What would you think about the Normans? I'm always unclear. When something makes an emotional connection. that's when they're going to be bound to remember it, you know?

The Normans. I love them. That's the emotions. Love. Yeah. Love. Oh, many splinter thing. Well, I don't know that we're doing great podcasting when Mike says, the Normans.

And then Jeff says, that's Australia. Right. Tim? And then Tim says, no, that's the UK. Well, that's on. That's on us, too. We got in a fight and no one understands any part of it. I don't know, it's hard. It's hard. I mean, I also noticed, like, out in public, you know, we used to be in a sketch comedy group and we had a TV show. And when people would quote the TV show to me, I would know what they're talking about because we put so much love, sweat and tears in blood, sweat, and tears into the show. Writing, acting, directing, editing it. So, yeah, I know every word of that show. It's funny with the podcast when people will say to me, like, something I said four years ago when I was drunk. And I'm like, huh?

I mean, don't get me wrong. I like that it struck a chord with them, but I don't remember any of it. Yeah, Tim, it's because it doesn't have any sort of emotional seat in your brain. That's the key to memory, folks, is just to, you got to have an emotional connection to it. This show doesn't matter. I mean, the stuff we say behind the paywall, that's all right. I'm going to remember until the day I die. That's the good stuff.

Yeah, and folks, you can hear that stuff if you just join our Patreon, club. It's kind of a club and all you got to do is have cash. Patreon.com slash the sloppy boys? Yeah, that's where the good stuff is. That's about right. You can also get some merch on there too. We got merch. I love that stuff. Do a merch search on our... We don't have merch of Patreon. Not the Patreon, but

through, oh sorry, through sloppyboys.com. The sloppyboys.com slash store. Yeah, this is a good plug. So wait, what... This is, we're a little all over the place. What is the booze? Here's the problem. Mike, you should. right before you podcast, you shouldn't use those hours to decide whether or not you're going to see fish at the sphere.

It throws you off. Yeah, don't use those hours that way. I'm not sure what drinker we're doing. I don't know what the Patreon is what we did. You know, I don't know. But I do know I'm probably not making it to the sphere this year. Unless I see Metallica. Wait, is Metallica playing the sphere?

In September, Tim, they're like $800 tickets right now. We got to figure that out soon, folks. I mean, enough people subscribe to the Patreon. We're filthy rich. $800 is like nothing to us. Should be easy. All right, what's the actual booze news? Okay.

So, um, Buzz balls. We talked about them on this podcast. Yeah, they're really huge with Gen Z kids over the UK. But is it going to hit as big here? And as we've been watching, there has been you know they came out with Buzz Ball's

biggies we talked about that on the show. I mentioned one time a lady got hit by Buzzball and Dodgers stagia. But we talked about Lonzo Ball. He was one of the spokespeople for Buzzball. Well, it has been growing, growing. I've noticed it more in my feed and then eventually

Godooge. My barometer for when something has gone mainstream in the United States is when it appears and the Grey Lady, especially if it was like drinking culture thing. This week, New York Times article, the high alcohol drink taking over Gen Z.

Gen Z. It has happened. It's spread across the pond here. And basically, this Q1 of this year, it seems, buzzballs have edged out cut water and beatbox as the number one ready to drink, canned contained cocktail.

I don't even know B-Bed Box. I never heard of B-Betbox. Screw off, Beatbox. You've seen Beatbox. They look like big juice boxes, like big Bokus. Ah, yes, but I know what a buzzball is. Yes, yes. Because I got the balls for a buzz ball.

You have the balls for a buzz ball? Yeah, is that any of their campaign? Maybe that's what's working on the Gen Z kids. The ball, you can stack. Remember, you can stack. stack? Yeah, it says here, but you can stack it like a big testicle. Everyone, uh, Nikki Minaj's cousin had those, his cousin's friend, cousin's friend had those giant balls from she said, or somebody said,

getting, uh, the vaccine from COVID. So maybe that's something he'd be interested in. He's got the big balls. And he's a Gen Z guy. Maybe he's a Gen Z guy. Well, so in this article, there's reports of, hey, you can't go to a party among young people without seeing buzz balls. Hey, all the beaches in Florida during spring break are covered in buzz balls. Liquor store owners saying the college kids are crazy for them. So I went looking and obviously a big part of any craze these days is going to be TikTok. So I did a little roundup of TikTok trends about buzz balls. And yeah, it's huge.

There's so many of them. We had talked about the at parties, groups were getting together and playing like hot potato with the buzzball biggie. And if you're stuck with it, you have to chug. Okay. There is a buzz bombing where you toss one to an unsuspecting person at the beach or on a golf course. If they catch it or even in a reflex go to catch it. Or at a major league sporting stadium, Ted. That lady just didn't know she was playing a game.

Poor lady. she didn't even get to have fun as much fun at Disney World as she wanted to oh yeah yeah right that she planned on okay so yeah you get thrown you get thrown a buzzball and then what there's other people putting their phone flashlight and buzzballs that looks kind of cool on TikTok you have people mixing buzz balls with beatbox you have the BBC which is buzzball beatbox and cut water all mixed together Joe oh whoa oh There's a challenge to chug three buzz balls in a row. Here's my favorite.

The 1738 challenge, guess what that is? Fettie Wap. You play Trab Queen and you have to chug a buzzball before he says 1738. It's not the first word of the song. Yeah, it's right toward the beginning. That's plenty of time, though, because you get... Dink-to-dunk-dunk-dunk-dunk-dunk-d-d-d-d-d-d- Right. Yeah.

Was that enough time for you to drink a buzz ball? Yes. Hold on. I probably have trap queen. This is, this is, da, da, da, do, do, do do. That guy. Fettywop recently out of prison.

Fettywap. All right, picture you've just been pitched. A big ball biggie. Not a good. Hey, man. You've just been handed a buzz ball. On comes trap queen. You crack it.

Don't see. What? What? I'm done. Me too. Yeah, this is long time. Okay, so you have 20 seconds? I don't know, like 16, 18 seconds?

That's plenty of times. Buzz balls are only 12 ounces, right? I can do two in that amount of time. I feel like they're less. They're about the size of a tennis wall, right? They're not. I know, but you know that thing where like you can fin, you see like a solo cup and it's like,

like surprising, if it's surprisingly amount. Is it surprisingly like the same amount as a pint glass? Oh yeah. Deceptive. A mudd bit of bad date. Let's see. 6.76 ounces. That's nothing.

Oh, that's easy. That's two, that's a three shots. Sorry, Fetti. Your challenge is easy, dude. Well, now with all these trains, and Gen Zigo and Kuku for it. Hey, there's also other new products.

Listen to this. Buzz Ball's Chillers, much like Fireball or 99 bananas, this is a lower ABV version that you can sell at gas stations because it is wine-based rather than liquor-based. Okay.

And now here you guys are sitting there thinking, oh, Buzz Balls Biggies are the biggest of all. Nope, now we have Buzz Balls, boulders, and they're even bigger than Buzz Ball. Boulders. Wait, which ones are Buzzball? XXL. Is that just biggies? I didn't come across that in my

findings. Hold on. Well, we're the biggest buzzball we saw. They had like those backyard pools that they were given away for like a little bit. And they filled them with cocktail? No, no. That was just water.

Well, it's interesting because Marley Kick was hanging out next to her pool when she came up with the idea for bus balls. That's probably why they did that. It's her and her nasty little sons, right? Yeah. Well, I think we made up a story about her sons

or something. Did they stink? Well, it was maybe getting a little incestuous, perhaps. We were on a roll in Austin. We were goofing around. We were making up a sketch, kind of. That was a good show, folks. Listen to it. Buzzballs live in Austin.

That was a good one. We got to get down to Austin to play some music. I love it there. Hey, how many sons do you think She's got a considerable number of sons. 12, 15. Hmm. Two. Just two.

I thought she had three. She only got two. Two. But what sons? But what sons? What sons they are. They met Lanzo Ball, I bet. All right.

Is that it for boo's news? Wrap it up. Wrap it up. I'm like, hey, what's up? Hello. See, your pretty eyes. So, news you came in the dough. Well, that's nice getting that done.

Getting that booze news out of the way. Because now we get to turn our attention to sort of the main event here on the pod. This is kind of what people tune in for if you're just checking us out for the first time. This is sort of the big deal. The drink of the day. Yes. And that drink of the day is the Lynchburg lemonade you've had? No.

No. You've heard. No. No. You're aware that it is named for Lynchburg, Tennessee. Tennessee, a state where the sloppy boys are about to play two shows because we're playing Atlanta, Knoxville, Nashville, Nashville, May 21st, 22nd, 23rd. Yeah, it's part of the Tennessee.

And some specials happen in Knoxville. We're playing at the Jortsfest. That's a festival, folks. We're festival guys now. Like, we'll do this probably this year and then the sphere next year and then Coachella the third year. Mike, you've been breaking in your Jorts for the Jords Fest, right? Uh-huh.

I cut some new, some, well, I bought some jeans, and I was like, you know what? I think these work. Bought them, like, at a vintage place. Brought them back to the house. They didn't exactly work. And I said, you know what? These are going to make a fine gene. They don't pass the closet test.

They don't pass the closet test. And I was fine with it because they were very cheap. It was just like a cheap little vintage place. Mm-hmm. And snips in. And now I'm working them in. They're leaves, Jeff. Lee's.

I had a pair of them way back in the day. I picture Lees with like I wore Lees as like a little boy. Lee Strasberg. My, uh, that's Noshkaxby. I don't think it's Lee Straussberg.

Lee Straussberg. Who's Lee Strauss? Oh, the acting. Wait, method actor. Yeah, yeah, that's a method. My neighbor Glenn Carbone wore Lee jeans.

Glenn. That sounds like a fake sketch character, Tim. No, he's Carol Carbone. his husband, not to mention Melissa and Michael's dad. Okay. I take it back. And who could forget? I take it all back.

Their dog lady. Oh. Oh. Oh, that dog's been leaving a mess. The Lynchburg lemonade, this is a wonderful sweet summer sipper. It's a very, very fun history, kind of the exact type of thing this podcast is all about. But I submit this is one that we, I want to jump straight to the recipe. I think we should make them take a break

and then I'll tell you guys the history while we're sipping on a delicious. That's a good idea because I'm a little thirsty myself. I would love that. Me too. Okay. So this recipe, which we are taking straight

from a Jack Daniels ad from the 1980s is it does it in parts. I'm going to do one. From the ad and straight to the dough. Hey, Tim, you just tell us the recipe all at once. Okay. Great. It says parts.

I'm going to do one ounce per part. you know, you can do whatever you want, whatever size you want to get. That's what part. One part Jack Daniels, Tennessee whiskey. One part sweet and sour mix. One part triple sec. Four parts, Sprite.

Add ice and stir garnish with lemon slices and cherries. Folks, if you don't have sweet and sour mix, you could do lemon juice and simple syrup. If you don't have Sprite, you can do... That's what I'm doing. You can do Starry. Oh, yes. I'm going Sprite.

I got Sprite myself. And traditionally you can make this in a Tom Collins glass, highball glass, or if you've got a mason jar, that's very appropriate. Ooh, I don't like the mason. I don't like drinks and mason jars. I finally figured it out. I just don't like that fucking thing. Like something was bothering you and you couldn't figure out.

I don't like something. What is it? If I was served a drink in a mason jar, be like, oh yeah, thanks. Then be like, hmm, okay. Well, something's not right here, but I don't know what it is. It seems cool. I mean, sometimes you get the mason jar with the handle, like a mug. Yeah.

And sometimes it's just the jar. Either way, you take a sip, ooh, my lips on the, ooh, the glassy threads that are going on that side of his. My lips are screwing onto the jar. Get the same screw it, man. I have to unscrew it from my mouth. No, the mason jar does a bad thing where it's like the, the, as you tilt the glass, the liquid is traveling to your mouth. And then it hits a speed bump and splashes all over the place. Hard bump.

It hits the bump like crocodile mile. Yeah, it's a crocodile mile that I could have a lot less of in my life. Now, Mike, just so we understand, you get served a drink in a mason jar, then you're grumpy for a few days. So it's probably cortisol in your blood, blood that was, you probably spiked your cortisol. And that's your problem. Yes. It is probably. Yeah, okay.

That's not, and that ain't good. No. And that ain't good. So wait, is there, is there a method we got to follow for that? Or is it just sort of... Add ice and stir, baby. Ooh, all right. Folks.

We're going to go stir these up. The Lynchburg lemonade. And when we come back, first sips. Yeah, those eyes are like around. Lynchburg lemonade's in hand. Let's see those guys. Look at this. Lynchburg lemonade and we're locked in.

You guys have nice looking ones. Lemon wheel. There's a mason jar. That's nice. Red Marasino. Mason. jerk got my end though. Colorful.

I got some of those like Marasino cherries that like are just in the grocery store, not anything special. They're like a neon red. Yeah, that's what I'm going to have them back in the mix. It's good for this type of drink.

Jeff's Luxardo plunds down to the bottom. Too much, it's got too much sugar and brandy on it. Now a lot of recipes for this floating around the internet put like an ounce and a half whiskey

or do all different types of variations, but I wanted to do the original from the ad, so that's what we're doing here. It might be kind of weak. Who knows? It looks nice. Here we go. Ah.

Oh, yeah. I'll tell you what. It goes down. Nice and easy. I didn't have any any like dumb cartoon orange triple sect.

I'm sorry. I'm trying to listen to Jeff and Mike. you were doing the, you have a metal straw so stirring the cubes was so loud, and then you took a zip, but then you went, I've been doing that a lot more likely, like unintentional. I got to stop doing that. That's an old man noise, right? It's like you said your goals for the gym are to increase your flexibility so that when you stand up or sit down,

it's not an event. Okay. All right. I will clock that. I'm aware. I don't work on it. Jeff, you were about to say. I didn't have any big, dumb cartoon orange triple sec, but I did have some nice dry curacao.

Interesting. And that's, and what does it remind me, Tim, you probably know, what's the relationship between curacao and triple sec? I mean, they're both orange liqueurs, but triple sec, even though it's called triple dry, I feel like Curacao is dry Like when I taste Curacao I taste a little more like stank on it It's like rind, yeah A little bit Um

Yeah I like this I mean it's it's weak on the booze But I do taste whiskey and it's like a bubbly lemonade That's delicious Yeah it's like if you put more whiskey in here It would be like Overpowering Like an ounce and a half If we're just going on the one ounce like an ounce and a half

I think it would be too much two whiskey for it. And this is like a long drink, you know, like a nice tall long drink like a yeah, a sipper. We did something else with Sprite recently. Was there like a long island variation? Not the AMF, but something else that we had Sprite

that was kind of like, oh, seven and seven. Mm-hmm. Ooh. Don't mind this at all. This does feel like a southern type of drink. Yeah, it's kind of a porch pounder. Kind of sweet. A porch pounder.

Nice. We should be sitting in front of Cracker Barrow on the rocking chairs with these. I do wish it being called Lemonade, I wish mine was a little like clouded out. Like this feels like it's kind of very see-through liquid. I wish it was more opaque. I don't really need this. I just add some flour, Mike. Or use a cloudier glass.

Mm-hmm, mm-hmm. Or a fully opaque glass. I wouldn't have this problem at all. It really doesn't have the sour bite because of all this owner. I wouldn't have to look at it. I was going to say maybe maybe I should just do more lemon give a little some type of

I'm squeezing my lemon wheel into it Ooh It's not going to do anything I shoved mine to the bottom and then punched it with the straw That's good It's not going to do anything This needs a major plus up of acid It needs to sharpen up

Yeah man Squeeze your lemon garnish in there I don't have a lemon garnish TIN There's your problem Jack. Okay, Robert Plant. I was just watching the Seinfeld with John Lovitz is in it.

And his storyline is like he had cancer and then he didn't, he was lying about it. And he had a, he got a toupee. And he, like, there's a run of scenes with him where he's like, hey, watch this, Jack. He's like, hey, look at this. I got this new hair. Jack. It's like after he gets the new hair, he says Jack a lot. Jack.

Ah, love that. Love that. Love that. Okay. Do you guys want to hear the history of this drink you're sipping on? Yes, finally.

Holy shit. Yes, yes, yes. I don't even know what I'm dealing with here. This is very fun. 1980, Huntsville, Alabama, a guy named Tony Mason has a restaurant and lounge called Tony Mason's,

where not only does he run the place, he also has a band, and they play there, and they sell records. So he was like a he was a rocker guy that opened up this club. Sort of a proto sloppy boy. It's like, yeah, yeah. I mean, we should have a bar that we play at every night.

I'm trying to. So one night, Tony has a sore throat. He makes himself a drink of Jack Daniels. We got Calpies. The Calpie Hideaway is our bar. We got that all figured out. I don't know if it counts if you never open up. Oh, well, we got to go.

Well, we got to open up. We got to open that. Go ahead. He makes himself this drink. He says, damn, that's a good ass summary drink. I'm going to start selling this at my club. And I'm going to call it the Lynchburg Lemonade because Jack Daniels is made in Lynchburg, Tennessee. Oh.

Now, I didn't know that. The drink, he starts serving at his restaurant. It's a hit. He leans into it real hard. He makes special Mason jars to say Lynchburg Lemonade. He sells Lynchburg Lemonade T-shirts. He changes the name of his band to Tony Mason's Lynchburg Review. So he's really

Dumbled down his whole thing is this drink. Where his bandmates is like, whoa, whoa, whoa, what? We're a band, man. I mean, they're playing at a restaurant every night, so I'm sure they're... That's true. They're down for a lot. The front man owns a restaurant.

So yeah, all right, all right. One day in 1982, a brand rep from Jack Daniels named Winston Randall strolls into the restaurant. He says, hey, we've been hearing a lot about your drink. What's this about the Lynchburg lemonade? made. And Tony welcomes him in. You know, he's...

Welcome in. Welcome in. Morva. Come on in and get to know me better, man. Yes, yes. Businesses to be had, my man. But he's happy to meet him. He says, come on in. Yeah, you want to know what the drink? I'll show you exactly how I make the drink. And he kind of butters him up. They head it off. Everything is nice. Winston goes back to Lynchburg, back to the Jack Dana's company, tells everyone at the company about it.

And then there's a write-up about this drink in the like the internal company corporate newsletter. And everyone's like, oh, look at that. Lynchburg Lemonade. The execs love it. They decide, let's run with us. Let's launch a big, huge magazine ad campaign all about the Lynchburg lemonade where we say the recipe. And let's go real big with this thing. They start running the ads in every magazine.

It's like a huge campaign. It says, to the drinkers of Jack Daniels. Jack Daniels Lynchburg Lemonade, our very own special recipe for sipping Jack Daniels in the summertime. And then there's other ones that are like, this ain't your grandma's lemonade type of thing. Jack. Jack. Yeah, Grandma's lemonade sucks. Tony Mason sees these ads and he's like, what the fuck?

Winston, the brand rep, promised me that if they ever ran ads for this, they were going to feature me and my band Tony Mason and the Lynchburg review. Okay. So he flips out and he takes them to court and it goes to trial.

So this is like a trial with a jury over this drink. And I was looking around. I found like legal documents like on the internet and I was kind of trying to decode the legalese because it's a little bit complicated. But from what I have gathered, this trial is like,

a fucking mess. That's so funny. Like I try to do my own taxes. And I'm like, oh, but you give me some, like, legal documents from like,

uh, from like Jack Daniels and Tony Mason's Lynchburg review. And I'm like, ooh, let me see if I got to roll my sleeves up with these for a little. See what I can discern. I know.

We got to get your tax person to be like, okay. So next year, just tell Jeff, like, it's really important. These happen. It's really,

it's part of a cool drink. He's learning a lot about drinks when he does this. if he doesn't do this Mega Man will be dipped into some battery acid I was it was hard to pick apart all of it but it you can tell just skimming it that like

this was like a big mess of a trial and it's really complicated but what it comes down to is this drink is not patented right it's not a patent on a recipe but Tony Mason says it's a quote unquote trade secret so then they have to they have to compare this you know the way

that trials work is you have to look through other court rulings to find precedent. And the only precedent that we had for a court ruling on a trade secret was a case involving drill parts. Like somebody had stolen somebody's drill parts in like a manufacturing case. But there's all this stuff to prove that your thing is a trade secret. There's certain measures you have to have taken to like keep it secret or whatever. So Tony has to prove that he guarded the. recipe and that he claims that every time he ever made the drink he went in the back room and

made it alone so he has to be alone sure i'm sure at his like busy club he was always going back in the kitchen from stay i'll be right back somebody's ordering a drink i have to leave stage my most popular drink make it right like we sell t-shirts of this drink and every time one is ordered i go make it in silence um he has multiple uh employees go on the stand and testify that yes Tony always went in the back room. And then the other side, they counter with the fact that any professional bartender can drink this Collins and figure out what the ingredients are. So they're saying it's not a trade secret. Then there's also like complications about what is quote unquote the punitive damages versus like whether it's nominal damages and what he's seeking.

And then there's a weird thing where it's called in question whether he's even suing the right. people because there's the there's the corporation but then there's the distillery or then there's Winston Randall the yeah he's he's just bummed that Winston didn't plug the band man he for real is he initially wasn't seeking money he wanted his band to take off so fun was he getting paid for like the the recipe or that okay so he really like his lawyers were like okay we're doing this for the money but yes for your band too but it's really hard with these recipes in general like you can't really patent like on the podcast I feel like we've only come across like the dark and stormy or a couple like if you're using a brand this is jack daniels but he doesn't own jack daniels so it's that's why he went the trade seeker route um anyway the verdict ends up being the the jury sides with tony mason but awards him one dollar and um the judge uh takes in the courtroom like takes the dollar out of his pocket.

I think they hate Tony Mason. Takes the dollar out of his pocket and says like, there you go. Are you happy? Because sure, maybe you're right, but this wasn't really a big trade secret and also who gives a fuck. And then Tony's pissed. He immediately files for an appeal.

They grant him an appeal. It goes to court again. And this time he fully loses and Jack Daniels wins. What the fuck? That sucks. Tony. It didn't work out for Tony Mason. You know, I'm raising the glass for Tony on this one.

That's tough. Tony. The tone mic. Big man push you around. But I was curious what Tony's up to these days as this drink has continued to be a popular southern summer cocktail. Like he's closing down Coachella with Tony Mason band. Actually, for a second, I found there's like a drummer from Huntsville, Alabama named Tony Mason, who was in a new metal band that opened for Chevelle and saliva and played the Yeager Meister music tour. But I think that's his son.

Was it him? Oh. Tony, according to my search took me all the way to Facebook. It looks like he's still in Huntsville, flipping houses. Nice. That's not so bad. That's so bad. Is Tony Mason's restaurant still around?

Defunct. Oof. Defunct. They should have brought defunct. Get it on the stage. I found pictures of the records that he put out from his band, from his restaurant band. Ooh. Very cool.

Yeah, that's a good story. That was a good story. Good story, Tim. Well told. Hey, you want to talk, you want, you want me tell you a little story? Oh, we're going to do a round two, yes. Yeah, I'm going to need one. I'm just going to add a little more of half ounce more whiskey and a little more of the lemon.

Yes. More whiskey, more lemon, for sure. Yeah. But what I was going to say is Tim, you were talking about a restaurant. I had a little culinary adventure of my own this weekend. You may have seen it online, folks. I made an artichoke soup from the recipe book of Tim Calpacca's sister. I saw this online.

It was wonderful. I got my crock pot out. I was making it up. I put in the stuff. I'm cutting everything up. Well, you like an artichoke as is. You're not afraid of no artichoke. I like an artichoke as.

As is, but for this recipe, you get the little jars of them for salads, you know, those little guys. Oh, yeah. Marinated. It was fun. I had never really made a soup before. I've done stews, but a soup is different. So you have a big pot full of soup right now? I only did have made the recipe, half of the recipe, and I ate the whole thing yesterday.

Whoa. Start as a lunch, went into a late lunch. I'm eating a whole thing of soup. Now did you? Half was lunch and then half for dinner. Did you cut the recipe and half because your pot wasn't big enough? Or did you think you were going to not want to keep eating it? Well, when I saw it was made for like six to eight people, I said, I don't need to do that many people.

He's one guy, Tim. He's one guy. I don't eat eight soup servings. I'll get sick of it. Sick of the soup. There's also some muscle. You ever get tin can muscles? Like sardines? Yeah.

Me neither. but there's a Tim, you would get sardines. You seem like a sardine guy. You do like the sardine can stuff. I'm a freak bar. I like the idea of sardines, like the peel them back

the top of that can, but kick it around eating a little fish hole. I don't know. On the cover of Hello Nasty are the Beastie Boys in a sardine can? Yes. I rest my case. Oh.

The Beastie boys were in a sardine can. Okay. Oh, wait. Did I cut us up? Are we making a second round? Yeah, we're going to do a second round. I think you're right. I'm going to do more lemon, more whiskey. Great.

And then, well, here's my conundrum. Now I'm fully out of triple sec. I don't have a triple sec option. I do have peach tree, banana liqueur, a blue curacao. You have a creme de cassis? Yeah, that's like a dark berry, though.

That'd just be. Yeah. I'm looking for like, what's... Yeah. Yeah, yeah. He's just taking inventory of your liquids. Peach tree? Did I say peach tree?

Yeah, what is just peach not? It's like that's, it's sort of more like the cartoon triple sec, but it's peach, not orange. I always think triple sec is like, when I taste it on its own, I'm like expecting something like peach, but it's its own, its own thing. Orange. It's his own orangey thing. I know, but it's got its own. It's orange. It's orangey.

Orange. All right. Maybe I'll do the the Carmen Miranda approach and just do a whole potpourri of different fruity liqueurs. I like that. Folks, we're going to make these second rounders. And when we come back,

final thoughts. Careful on the back. Round two, Lynchburg lemonade. I did another half ounce lemon juice, another half ounce. Jack. And a peach tree, because I had it. You got a nice yellowy one there, Jeff.

You got a good color on that. Ooh, that could be a good basis for the... Piss and shit. Yes. Piss and shit. That's right. We should do that next week. The piss and shit cocktail will be a Lynchburg lemonade topped with...

A little brown floater. See, I don't know if the... Like, I think we need lemonade that's got some density to it or something... Yeah, but I think Myers does float well. on top of other more sugary stuff. Oh. It's a common floater, Mike. Myers is a common floater.

But we'd have to simplify this. This is too many ingredients for just the bottom half of a drink. Yeah. Right? Because this is also going to be a shot perhaps or... But Tim, you got to agree this is pretty yellow. I must agree. And to the listeners that haven't been tracking the show,

we're trying to come up with a hit cocktail called The Piss and Shit so that like hot people have... clubs are forced to order a drink called piss and shit. But they love it. Everyone loves it. They're forced to. Because it's just too big of a social sensation. They have to order it.

Imagine the apparel spritz, the espresso martini, the piss and shit. It's right up there. It's right up there. Oh, yeah, man. Maybe it's a shot. Did we talk about that? Maybe it's just a two-tone shot. That feels like a craze, a shot.

Yeah, but does the bartender want to bust out the spoon and make a two-tone shot? right right right well we gotta ask I don't give a fuck what the bartender wants to do Tim whoa it is easy if the piss is just sour mix and sour mix and dark rum that's if that's hey Tim the piss is the easy part

it's just like life and then there's then there's the shit's hard I don't know I think we said the shit's easy it's just gonna be dark one no but you get a floated on top of the spoon oh right right okay so that's part of the tag But just the way you have to sort of sort of you have a float slash hover your ass above a toilet. Think of the, think of the spoon as the one metal ass cheek. Oh, yeah.

That's actually really helpful way of thinking about it. Because people don't think of spoons as the ball, the balby side. And you know how you gently roll your turds down the side of the curvature of your ass cheek? he's lay on your side all right now wait a minute we're getting lost in this thing man we're getting lost in the sauce man well okay well stay tuned next week for we'll really crack the coat

on the piss and shit aka what is it the illissa loo that's the figure right we should call it the we should call it the illicit lu like it's an elicit drink something well you know this is all still in the sort of yeah

It's in the test kitchen. We shouldn't have said anything. We normally would know the test kitchen. All right. So round two. Fuck you. I'm taking a sip of my round two. Way better with the whiskey and more lemon.

Way better. Yep. Yeah. Just more flavor. Like it was all there. It just needed to step into the light basically. Find your lights. Folks, you're going to need more flavor.

You want to please the tongue. Yes. You do. Yes. Please the tongue. Please the bartender because Jeff was just talking shit on the bartenders, but the bartenders hands you to drink,

you drink it and you smile. They notice that type of thing. They're out there looking. They're looking. Bar might be busy and say, hey, give me a fucking top cowl. Give me this, give me that. Hey, hey, new guy, yeah? You know that gin and tonic you can barely handle?

Yeah, they're sending it back, aren't they? Dude, they're smiling. They fucking love it. They're smiling because of you. They like you, man. Me, but I make people frown mostly. Do you think a lot of bartenders listen to this show? I wonder if you're a bartender,

other than a famous bartender, Jack Tram, he listened. Dale DeGraff, possibly the best bartender. I think that bartenders listen, but they just have to have the right head, the mindset that we're going to say somethings that are wrong, but that's because we're a wonderful popular rock band. Right. Yeah, you have to sort of be like a fan more of the popular fun rock band,

and we do this sometimes. I mean, every week, but sometimes. And we actually know more than we let on, but we like to keep the pot approachable. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. We're characters. These are characters. We're all very smart with this stuff.

Smart with the stuff? This stuff, I said. Oh, I'm so sorry. Oh, okay. I'm so sorry. This type of stuff. Yep. This is a very refreshing drink.

I like this. Mm-hmm. My, I guess the one thing I would dingamon if you were to meet up with. Dingamon. We are both seasons of Digamon on Netflix right now? Yeah. Or is that Pokemon's friend?

No, dig them up. If I were meeting with Tony Mason, I would say, buddy, I like your drink. That's fine. You did a great job. I hear good things about your band, too. But did you hear the music? Is your drink better than a, like a whiskey Collins? You know, like, does it need the triple sec?

Does it need the Sprite? Yeah, this is kind of a. Right. I feel like we're in an awkward no man's land between like sort of a whiskey Collins and a whiskey sour. I just have here a water. I got myself a nice big, tall, whiskey sour. That's a good way of putting it, Jim. And I kind of thought we were in trouble when I was looking and seeing like, sour mix and Sprite.

You're kind of like, if the Sprite's not going to do the job entirely, it's a little redundant to have like all these sweet agents. You know, your Sprite, you're triple sick, you're sweet and sour. I'm all on board for Sprite, Starry, seven up, but they don't really mix well in drinks. Like they're good to maybe cut down like a vodka, like a hard vodka or something, but it's a good filler outer. Filler out, but it doesn't add much taste. Like it really gets like knocked down by alcohol. Yeah, it's a volume. Or so than like a cola.

I keep grapefruit soda around the house as much as I can, preferably badger beves. And then sometimes I'll just do like a minute made pink lemonade to keep around. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. As a filler router. But keep around the house or just in the refrigerator? Do you have just sort of comes throughout the area? I'll kind of hide it like under the couch, behind the fridge. But for this, what was he going to say?

Oh, interesting to me that Jack Daniels is so in bed with Coca-Cola, right? Jack and Coke. They even like sell the can together, Jack and Coke. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And Sprite is in the Coke family. I wonder like what what sort of corporate Right What sort of corporate deals are going on

They're in bed with each other man That's how Sprite got in there I don't think it was Tony at all I was looking I think it was Winston Winston Randall Winston I think it was Winston

This should be the Sloppy Boys movies We're kind of like It's more like a few good men or something like that we're like or maybe we're going over this as a cold case and then we find out it's like a reveal like a like a LA confidential type of thing it was Winston Randall all time we're going through the micro fiche all right I did find one one of one of the vintage ads said Sprite or seven up and then but the one I'm looking at right now says Sprite.

I like these old magazine printouts of ads. Yeah. They come from a corporation and that sucks. But knowing that it's like printed in a 70s magazine, they got these recipes in Sports Illustrated and Playboy and Time magazine. I like the design too. There's something about 70s magazines, like the photography that was going for like,

I mean, you're right. It's just corporate ads. So I can't be like, I was better the back then. But like you get the sense that like, the photographers that they hired or the creative directors on these projects were like not just only going for what's eye-catching, but like kind of trying to convince you of a lifestyle or, you know, like, or something, you know. And like people got, like a staff of people got paid probably like hundreds or thousands of dollars to like to care about the Lynchburg Lemonade magazine ad. And now it's like, nah, it's all online now and some fucking teenager's going to do it.

And, you know. Well, yeah, but somebody's paying that person 100. of dollars to do that. And they're excited about it for the 10 minutes they put it up. If they are, that's great. No, they're not. I don't know. I think they're like, they're using a stock image and some social media in turn is getting

you know, free lunch out of it. I know that Buzzballs is absolutely mailing out Buzzballs to TikTok influencers. They're making sure they're 21. But those guys like chugging three in a row are doing the 1738 challenge a lot of time. Oh, did those happen to come free in the mail from Buzzballs? interesting

are they sending to any podcasts or party rock bands they said no I actually did see one interesting thing that Buzzballs has like a like there's there is somebody in charge of like the digital

like the ethics of the drink making sure that the way it's talked about on message boards and stuff is not about young about underage people getting fucked up like and reporting back trying to make sure that it's not like people under 21. Yeah, they don't want any Jeff Dutton Prom Night

makes hard lemonade fiascos on their hands. They've heard all about that. That's their worst nightmare. The other thing I like about those old 70s ads is like the long paragraphs, it just kind of fills, you're supposed to read it like it's a voiceover to a commercial,

but it's like in your head you have to be kind of like do a Southern voice if it's a Southern one or like a kind of chill, guy voice if it's like a bare rug in front of a fireplace. It's nice. It's like you get to be the ad guy. And like sometimes they're like not very sparing with the text either. It'll be like it's like the whole wraps around the whole image. Sort of a page of a magazine here. It's a chapter of a book that you get to. Oh, here's a slice of life where a tired old cowboy sitting on the porch.

Did we give our reviews, Jeff? Did we say? I think I said, order again for me. I like it. I order again But I'm more, I think I like a, we've never done a whiskey Collins on the show, but I like that drink probably more than this. So I got a dingy it. You didn't improve upon the thing you were kind of probably inspired by. But I do like this. It's sweet. People who like sweet drinks in the summer are going to like this. It's an easy one.

Yeah, it's an easy order again. Make it. And there's nothing special about it. There's not like some great alchemy happening. Yeah. So dial up anything up or down you want to do. maybe you dial yourself all the way to a whiskey sour. That'd be fine too.

But just something to be said, Jeff, you're a whiskey sour guy. I'm a whiskey sour guy. But a fizzy whiskey sour, you know, like the fizzy lemonade that's big in the UK, if you're not going to a fizzy whiskey sour, it's kind of nice. A fizzy whiskey. A fizzy whiskey. Also, you get to sit with it for a little longer, too, you know? A nice tall boy.

That's our show. on social media at the sloppy boys where we release these recipes ahead of time and if you can't get enough boys it's patreon.com slash the sloppy boys that's where you get the bonus here's a fun thing i noticed about our bonus some other shows a fast food talk show comedy show their main show is long two hours long bone the bonus only hands up being about half as long as that main what on the sloppy boys blowout. The blowout is as long as the main event.

Wow. Perfect timed episodes I have been hearing. So you really are getting double content if you think about it. Wow. Yeah, that's nice. Shee. Him. Well, it's a good episode, guys.

Good episode, good on you, Jeff, for sort of hosting this thing, wrangling it back in the shape. Eh, it's a... Yeah, well, fine. Why didn't he edit? Won't we, Meeleyn? Won't we mealing? We always do. Somehow we always do. See you next week, folks. Bye. Bye. Peace. Hey guys, it's Mielan Patel, editor of the pod. This is going to sound crazy, but I actually didn't edit this episode at all. The guys did it all on their own. And actually, between you and me, I only edit like half of the episodes.

Please don't tell the guys. I really like getting paid for all the episodes. All right, see you next week.