The Sloppy Boys - 40. Paloma

Episode Date: July 23, 2021

The guys check out a tequila-based cocktail that gives the Margarita a run for its money in its native Mexico.PALOMA RECIPE 1.66oz/50ml 100% Agave Tequila 3.33oz/100ml Pnk Grapefruit Soda .2oz/5ml Lime Juice Pinch of SaltPour tequila into highball glass and squeeze the lime juice. Add ice and salt and top with pink grapefruit soda. Stir gently. Garnish with slice of lime.Recipes via the International Bartenders Association (https://www.iba-world.com/) Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Folks, welcome to the Sloppy Boys, where we take a deep dive into the drinks that you love. I'm Jeff Dutton, along with Mike Hanford. Goddammit, Bobby. And Tim Kalpakis. What is up, Bobby? And we're your hosts, the Sloppy Boys. Bobby's World. That's what the dad from Bobby's World.

We are the Sloppy Boys. Jeff, sorry to cut you off, but I got so excited. That's an impression of Hank Hill. You know him from King of the Hill. I've been phasing out the and we're your hosts part. Slowly phasing it out. You don't need it. We get the point.

The audience gets the point. It's cleaner. They don't want to deal with it. You don't need it. Chop it. Jap it the audience gets the point it's cleaner they don't want to deal with it you don't need it chop it jap it don't bore us get to the chorus you make a good point about hank hill as well mike i definitely know him best from from king of the hill uh yes yeah yeah uh and so on and so forth i'm gonna go through the whole fucking theme song, but it's great. It's great.

You know what would be cool? If somebody did a mashup of bing-a-ling-a-ling-a-ling and the jackass, that Minuteman song, Corona. Somebody get on that. And maybe I'll mash that all up with like a booze news theme too. There you go. That's cool. You know what?

And throw in fucking duck tails too. Ooh, cocktails. Ooh, if it fits. Ooh. Uh, speaking of Mike judge,

um, uh, did, did I ever talk about the, well, maybe I was with Jeff, but Mike, I don't know if I told you about this one time we were walking into a party at like a posh club it was somebody's birthday somebody cool

and um i was walking in either with jeff or mitch uh i'm walking in and looking to see who's at the party like it's like in the back corner of a restaurant. And I look off. Oh, right. Yeah. Then you're in the story, Mike. I look in the corner and I see Mike and I go, I go, Hey, Mike's here. And then the bald head walking in front of me turns around Mike judge. And I took me a long time to do the math. What happened where he heard me say Mike's here and he turned around cause he thought he was Mike. And I just stared at him and I was like, well, he is. But, but I didn't, I didn't do the math to think, Oh, his name is Mike and he thinks I'm talking to him. I was just like,

he was in butthead guy right here. Look at looking right at me. Were you like, were you like that? You Mike Hanford. Not you, you jag off. And then I went to his bald head. Were you like, were you like, not you, Mike Hanford? Not you, you jag off. And then I went to his bald head and I was going, eek, erk, erk.

Man, that's so funny to think of Mike Judge at like a cool party. I just think of him as like a Texas weirdo animator man and then to see him out at the club. Well, wait,

where was it? What club was it? Is it Pala House? Is that the place? Is that a cool alley? Pali House. Pali House. Pali House? Yeah. Adam Pali's house. What the hell was I at Pali House? Is that the place? Is that a cool alley? Pally House. Pally House. Pally House?

Adam Pally's house. What the hell was I at Pally House for? And then we didn't go together? Yeah. Oh, Tim, you come here all the time. What's happening? Yeah, you were kind of just, I don't think you knew there was a party there that night.

You were in a bathrobe. Tim! I had a room. You kind of came up to me, kissed me on both cheeks. This way, my boy. The freshest wine for my Tim. Freshest wine. Brand new.

Yeah, for those who are uninitiated, the Pally House is kind of like, it's in West Hollywood. It's like a nice hotel bar type of a place. Usually we shouldn't be. Why the hell were hell were we there if it was a birthday party it was a celebrity birthday party and but i don't think my judge was there he was just having trying to have a night out on the town without being fucking hassled by some Greek by you he turned around something he said oh not another Greek i heard i heard it uh i remember i mean uh at the uh at that party um pam anderson walked by and he goes whoa boobs no no i can't believe it he acts like

his character i watched uh i watched um the beavis and butthead uh do america movie recently it made me laugh and laugh. It's so funny. It's great. Like those guys are so dumb in a way that I forgot how funny it is. They did the cold open for Jackass 3D is Beavis and Butthead introducing the movie. And that's such a hard thing to do to have something like that be funny. And they're very funny. Just look. Butthead's face.

When you're looking straight front on butthead, he looks so different because from the side, he has no sideburns and he looks so weird. And then when you look at him from the front, he's all stacked up vertically. There's a great line in the movie in the beginning, you know, they're like the,

like a Godzilla type guys. Right. And he, somebody's like shooting him or he's like, Hey, cut it out. Butthead. It's like, that's like shooting him or he's like, Hey, cut it out. Butthead. It's like,

that's his name. Using it as an insult. Oh, well, we got to get them on here. That's a whole different podcast. Yes. You guys want to get into some news?

Ooh. Yeah, sure. Hit it. Who's news? Hello, where's the pod? Who's news? I've had.

I've had a bunch. I've. I've. It's. News. You have to find. Fuck face. Do do do do. Whoa. I've had it. It's Booze News. You're a foo-fighting fuckface. Doo-doo-doo-doo-doo. Whoa.

That was Fooze News by Dan Padley. And if you've got a Booze News theme, send it to thesloppyboyspodcast.gmail.com. Nice one, Padley. Padley, nice one. Yeah. What did the end say? The end was too low for me to hear it. Foo-fighting fuckface? Foo-fighting fuckface. I get it. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. A lot of Fs flying around. one yeah what what did the end said that the end was too low for me to hear it foo fighting fuck

face foo fighting fucking i get it oh yeah yeah a lot of f's flying around do you have that thing where you can't hear frequencies certain frequencies yes low frequencies which is tough because in our band i am the bass player well that's probably very freeing it's why you're so experimental down there oh yeah does it come across good. No, no. The volume was too low. Volume. Oh. The vol. Mike, you've got some booze news. Share with us. I've got booze news here. So this is ripped directly from the headlines of, can you believe it folks? On July 1st, Natty Light set a world record. Do you know what it is? Whoa.

Um, most bubbles per can. Most, I'm going to go with most bubbles worldwide. Well, on, uh, the beginning of July, they were unveiling their new Natty Light USA cans. I got to get on this thing. I love those cans. I love, uh, fun summer cans. I got to get on this thing. I love those cans. I love fun summer cans. And to celebrate, they attempted and did beat the world record for longest slip and slide in the world. Oh, I heard of this.

Whoa, how long was it? The Guinness. Yeah, they were in Canaan Valley, West Virginia at a ski resort down there. It's funny. I don't think of skiing in West Virginia, but what do I know? And previously the record was held by the country of Jordan at a 2007 feet long slide. And they beat it with a 2021, 2021 foot slip and slide. That's like half a mile.

Maybe I think it's yeah. But's like half a mile, maybe? I think it's, yeah, almost a half a mile. Damn, that's a long ride. That's cool because you could start it and then if you get kind of tired of it halfway through, you can be like, I'm going to get off. Yeah, you don't necessarily have to do the whole thing. You could just be using it as transportation

like a road instead of just for fun. I got to go half a mile away. This article I read said the Guinness book of records guy had to, he had to see the person at the top, like get in. And then, uh, he had to get in a car really quick and go all the way to the end and drive to the end and watch the person finish. Cause he couldn't see the whole thing. because he couldn't see the whole thing. Michael, you recently gave your niece Tig a slip and slide. I gifted Tig a slip and slide.

Yeah, I probably don't want to tell her about this story because she will want me to buy this slip and slide. You're going to look like a cheapskate. Yes. Well, you keep it with six inches, Uncle Mike. And I'll hear it from her. Can we get your eyes. Can't do anything right. Well, let's get out to West Virginia and do that slide.

West Virginia, mountain mama, John Denver, take me home. Take me home. That country road. I'm a country dude. The Whites of West Virginia. Have you ever seen that? That's produced by the Jackass. It's a Jackass production.

Of course I've seen it. Yeah, Wonderful Whites. Yeah. It's a crazy little doc. The Wonderful, yeah. That's kind of funny because it's like they took that. They were, now there's all kinds of exploitation docs like Joe Exotic and stuff like that. they were now there's all kinds of exploitation docs like joe exotic and stuff like that but at the time i remember watching the wonderful whites and being like this is it's like vernon florida

the verner herzog or or errol morris dog and you're like which you're used to being serious and then it was like but this one's kind of funny and i was like what the fuck is going on and now now you can't fucking walk down the street without watching a zany documentary. I know. I know. Thank you, Netflix. Thanks, Sarandos.

I only watch Grey Gardens. You only watch Grey Gardens? Is that what it was? Jeff, are you honestly telling me you only watch Grey Gardens? Only ever. Out of all the media, all the media you can consume these days, I declare that a lie. Oh, shit, it's back.

Oh, shit. So you're doing a boxing match again. Yeah, I've got a little hammer and a little glass just in case a boxing match happens. Now, isn't that the same hammer that fell out and went behind your toilet? Yes, I gave it a little rinse, but there's still... I'm not going to say there's no pubes on here. Hey, you know what?

I got some more booze news. Why not? Hit it. So I'm at the grocery store today getting the part of the thing I need for today. And I'm going up and I'm saying hello to the cashier, a nice lady. And at her register, I noticed six Montauk beer pint glasses.

And then over on like other cash registers too, I noticed them as well. And I said, hey, how much are you selling those for? And she said, you know what, you just take it. No. I don't know what, it might be a promotional thing they just got with a bunch of Montauk beers. And I said, thank you so much. That's amazing. You're going to get a mention.

Did she give you a little wink like she was maybe, you know, Santa Claus in disguise or Bagger Vance or something like that? She gave me a wink. And then as I was walking out, I heard someone else, someone who seemed like they were in a managerial position, be like, sir, sir, are you not supposed to? And I put my headphones in and I was like, gone. Sir, I hope you're walking to prison. She's not authorized to give those away. Do you think you're going to use that glass today? Will I use it today?

Yeah, thank you. Why don't we get out of booze news and we can talk about that? I do not like discussing the drink here in booze news. Yeah, it feels weird. It feels very weird. That feels like a big old bowl of wrong. I got you, Mike. I do not like discussing the drink here in Booze News. Yeah, it feels weird. It feels very weird. That feels like a big old bowl of wrong. I got you, Mike. I got you right here.

Wrap it up! Okay, so Booze News is now done. We know what that sound means. And now, do you want to tell us about the glass or should I go into the drink first? Get into the drink because we should probably know what the drink is before we talk stemware. Well, the drink of the day is, I know it as the Dove.

No. But you Spanish speakers may know it as the Paloma. Really? That's what Paloma means, Dove. It means Do dove in Spanish. And Duddy, why don't you go ahead and hit me with some background music? Oh, yes. Beautiful.

All right, slopheads. Let's say you're out at a cantina with your squad. And, you know, let's say you possibly even have squad goals. And it's time to place your order. And somebody orders a margarita. You know, and you're like, okay, Gramps. And then somebody else orders a beer with a lime in it. And you're thinking, that's kind of a basic bitch move.

Wow. And then let's say that somebody orders, you know, a sangria. Yeah. And you're like, you know, enjoy your purple teeth with that one. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Let's say somebody orders a ranch water, you know, a Topo Chico with a little tequila in it. And you're thinking, that's kind of cool, but still, you know, drop dead. That's a ranch water we're talking about?

That's a ranch water. Is that what you said? Yes. It's cool, but it's not cool enough. Mm-hmm. Sure. So what you do when you want to turn heads, you say, me? Well, I'm going to order, and Jeff, give me a big echo on this one, a Paloma.

A Paloma. Paloma. Yes, it's a tequila with grapefruit soda, folks. And here's the thing. Americans may think that Palomas are a drink that plays second fiddle to the margarita, something you order when you're trying to not have a marg. But in Mexico, they are just as popular. I hear some people say that they're maybe more popular because they're so user friendly.

It's light. It's refreshing. It's an easy 24, 7, 365 sipper. Yeah. But as for the history, it's all fucked up. Why? What else is new? Another cocktail

history that doesn't make any damn sense. This one is screwier than any of the others we've even talked about because in this case, an internet troll went on Wikipedia and put a fake history and then a bunch of dumb ass, like YouTube bartender influencers repeated that history.

Well, that doesn't help us. Yeah. It was, uh, some jester. It might've been one of the jackass guys probably that played that prank. Yeah.

I think it was, um, it was definitely Pontius. Yeah. Um, was it fam's dad, Phil? Yes, and April was like, don't do that, Phil!

No! But what we do know is it came out of Mexico in the 1950s. Difford's Guide claims that the legendary bartender Don Javier Delgado Corona invented it at La Capilla in Tequila, Mexico, in the Jalisco state. Okay. But, you know, some people suspect that maybe the soda companies had a hand in getting this thing started. Historians like David Wondrich have basically debunked every theory but not landed on what the truth is.

Real help. Real help, Dave. Thanks a lot for being out there, making this so fun. It's not that. It's just not that. I don't know what it is, but it's not that. It's not that, but then also it's nothing. It doesn't exist.

Okay, Dave. For me, I never heard of it when I lived in New York. Then I moved to L.A. and I went to El Chivito, and I saw a Paloma on the little chalkboard, and I said to the bartender, what's a Paloma? And he said, tequila and squirt. And I said, sign me up for that, you little

son of a bitch. That sounds great. You guys, you've had? I've had. Not had. Barely heard. Hmm. So you've heard, but just it's hanging on by a thread. because sometimes i'm like have

i heard of that drink am i thinking of something else uh whatever it'll never come back in my life and here it is duddy i've had and i've had enough to know that uh these can vary wildly yes yes yes yes we'll get into it oh well oh you better believe do you think we'll get into it. Oh, we will. Oh, you better believe we will. Do you think we'll get into it in this episode? It's possible. We should. I mean, we definitely should. Yeah, I vote we do. Well, it's funny because even you saying that,

I wonder, we might have different proclivities because I like them a certain way. Now, I have questions about this, but I do want to hear the ingredients first. Here is the IBA recipe. Ooh, we're back on the IBA list. That's nice. We're back in business, on the list, making our way through. I've heard from, I've gotten some personal DMs

from slopheads be like, you assholes are never going to go back on the IBA. And it's, you know, the same crowd that just wants to get at me and nitpick me. And it's, you know, first of all, you can have that opinion, but you don't have to say that word to me. I feel like these people who don't, that hate the show so much, they just shouldn't listen. I think they just don't like me, the show they enjoy. They just

don't like me on the show, but they don't like me being here. They don't want me to chime in. Well, guess what folks? I ain't going away. We should try an episode without you, Mikey. Just see how it goes. You listen, it's just like me and Jeff laughing so hard and having a blast. Oh, this is great. I was like, how did they get Collins happening? Oh. How did they get Jessica Simpson to call in? We didn't even invite Collins, but Jessica Simpson was like,

bring our phone off the hook. And she reconciled with Nick Lachey. Ooh. Okay. Here's the recipe from the IBA. 50 milliliters of 100% agave tequila. Don't fuck around with the tequila, folks. It's a simple drink here.

So pick your favorite tequila. Five milliliters of fresh lime. That's a squeeze. a simple drink here. So pick your favorite tequila. Five milliliters of fresh lime. That's a squeeze. That's just one little squeezer. So, you know, use some. Not hard. That's not hard. A pinch of salt. That's not hard, quite frankly.

I don't have a grain of salt in the house. Oh, no. Also, and if you do get them, just don't pinch too hard. A nice light pinch. Yeah, you can really hurt your index, your pointer and thumb. Finally, the...

Hold on, real quick. Is that helpful at all? Yeah, because when you said pinch, I was like, what is it, ring finger and pinky? It changes the amount of salt very much uh based on which fingers that's true okay uh tequila lime salt and pink grapefruit soda 100 milliliters of pink grapefruit soda guys what do you think? I love it. This was one, when I saw it on the list, I even texted you guys.

I said, where are we getting this stuff? What is it? Who, how, and when? And immediately after I texted you, I found it. But I had never seen it before. Well, yeah. I mean, Squirt is the one that I know most. And Squirt is like Coca-Cola Company or Pepsi, at least Coke.

And it's everywhere. But there's a few others. Um, I, I was having fun. This is such a simple drink and I've gotten used to going to the store and buying a hundred bottles of Florida and stuff. So I bought a few, I bought a few options of grapefruit soda, uh, some of the, some of the classics to try. But the thing is, I kind of like that the IBA is saying soda here because these days,

most fancy bartenders and every craft cocktail bartender on YouTube tells you to squeeze your own pink grapefruit mixed with club soda and maybe a little simple syrup. And I'm sure that that's way better, but it's not the original. Like this is an easy drink that you're supposed to make as a simple simple syrup. And I'm sure that that's way better, but it's, it's not the original, like this is an easy drink that you're supposed to make as a simple mixed drink. So I kind of

liked that the IBA is telling us to just use one of the classic sodas and leaving it to the craft guys to go squeeze in citrus. Yeah. And you have a lot of options when it comes to grapefruit sodas, like more than you'd think when you dig. Now, find them there's there's more than you think should we talk about which ones we got or was she would we should should it be a mind-blowing reveal mind-blowing let's have a mind-blowing reveal because mine's in the fridge and i'm not gonna go that far great uh but uh yes before i did find the soda i did find find a number of joies de grap frietier in the juice aisle. I do a little French when I do a grapefruit juice. Joies de grapier.

I'm going to hit you with a method here, which is you pour the tequila into a highball glass, you pour the tequila into a highball glass, squeeze the lime juice, add ice and salt, fill up with pink grapefruit soda, stir gently, and garnish with a slice of lime. It's a highball, folks.

You're basically making like your Tom Collins or that type of a thing. It's a nice gentle stir. Would a Montauk pint glass work? It says here, ideally. Ideally. It says ideally Massapequa pint glass,

but Montauk is a close second. Does it say anything about that it was a gift from the cashier? Your favorite cashier? It says nice wink from a nice cashier. Nice. Well, shall we we i can do this let's let's work this is all pretty clear what do you say we go knock it out of the park let's do it oh yeah it's very clear peace see you on the other side Hey folks, we're back with our Palomas in hand. Yes.

Now this is, I didn't, this looks like a pink lemonade. It's pink. Yeah, but pale. For me, for me, quite pale. Pale pink. Yeah, for me, no pink hue uh whatsoever although my gosh here's this ice color do you use squirt i yes i bought three i bought i had a nice glass bottle of mexican squirt then i got a nice glass bottle of haritos yeah uh mexican uh, grapefruit. Then I got a bottle of like an Italian soda. You know those fancy fruit Italian sodas,

the pink grapefruit. Where'd you get that from? Coca-Cola. These were all from Albertsons. Ooh. And I did a little taste test as I was making this and the Italian one was the fanciest and tastes most like grapefruit,

but it was like very bitter and seemed like a whole different thing. And then Squirt just tasted exactly, it tasted iconic. And it's the Mexican Squirt, so it's sugar instead of corn syrup. And I went, Squirt! Nice. I got... Is that their, do they say that in all their commercials? Hey, drink Squirt.

I got this fever tree. you've probably seen these like ginger beers michael i'm right there with you that's what jeff got too you know i was i told you guys on the text chain i thought i had squirt i had fresca oh and that works but see i that is not my last palomas i i was like i'm gonna i'm'm going to get a couple options here. And I got Squirt and I got Fresca and I didn't really like either of them. Yeah. So I wanted to change it up. Yikes,

yikes, yikes. The first sip of Fresca is always good and then the second is already, you're like, oh, this is NutraSweet, sucralose or whatever. I think that's Fresca's tag. The first sip is great. Then say no more.

Did you guys have this problem where when cocktail recipes tell you to add ice after other things, my ice plops down and splashes me in the face. Yeah, that can happen. But I had to add more tequila because I put my tequila and lime in the bottom and I dropped some cubes and I lost half my tequila. It's a very thin excuse, Tim.

You just add as much tequila as you want. But then look at this. I added all the soda they told me to. I didn't fill my glass. I got a dry cube balancing once again at the top of my cup. You gotta make a double with something like that. Fuck my life. Lime on the end.

Please. All right. Can we do some sips and maybe it'll all be worth it? Yeah. Bottoms up. Oh, I love it. Ooh, fresh. Ooh, the salt.

Hey. Yeah, the salt's in there. Don't tell our doctors we're having salt. You specifically added it. And tequila. Yeah, maybe I did too much salt. The lime is in there. What tequilas did you guys use?

Espolone. Cazadores. Cazadores. Well, I had a little... What did you have, Jeff? Espolone. Espolone. I've never heard of that, or Casadores. I had Jose Cuervo Silver.

Hey, that'll work, though, especially if you got fever tree. It works well, my boy. All too well, yeah. I used fancy salt. I had some big grain sea salt, and so I do think same, maybe mine got too salty because you know, there's like less surface area, more salt per pinch. I used, I used a, yeah. One of those like sea salt grinder things by the store. I, I maybe, uh, I, so I may be over salted this, but I do just love, we've talked a lot on the, on the show about cocktail versus mixed drink, you know, rum and Coke, gin and tonic. I like the idea of this

podcast on, I think it was on this show. I don't know. I guessed on a lot of pods. It could have been one of my hit characters on bang bang. So when you say cocktail, you mean like the, the old standards and then mixed drinks, you mean like a soda bubbly long drink. I mean like two ingredients, a liquor and a soda and maybe a squeeze of citrus. But this drink to me, I feel like this should be, it's very easy to keep squirt around. And with the little squeeze of lime and a little pinch of sugar, I mean salt, it's just as pleasing as a margarita to me, to me personally. To you personally, that's fine.

I, yeah, I should have not done so much salt. I did like a twist and a half on one of those things. Yeah. Yeah, I heard when we took a little break, I heard from my computer speakers, I heard you going, and I was like, one, two, three. I had my neighbors over to count me on one two three

mike i from the sound of it i thought you were taking pictures with a fun saver disposable camera advancing to the next yeah it makes it makes a very similar sound you finished 24 snaps and then you just kept going i saw a guy today on the street talking into what I thought was a fun saver disposable camera. And I was like, what the fuck is this guy doing? So I was like, kind of was looking at him for a little while. It turned out to be like a yellow walkie talkie. But boy, when I saw it, it looks like a fun saver camera. This man is losing his mind.

He's making TikToks or something. It was funny because he was somebody working at a construction site. This guy's got to be on the ball here. Beams are going to be falling on people's heads. It's funny when you walk by a construction site and you see

why does his cell phone look like that? When you're on a job site of some sort and you see like appliances that look entirely different than those available to the public they they have that like rubber that rugged rubber all the yellow rubber case over every fucking thing rugged rubber how did you get that rugged rubber what are we doing rugged rubber month next month for sure we promise next month i you guys have a much different experience walking by construction sites than I do because you guys are oh his cell phone's weird oh that he is gear that I don't have me I'm just getting like

hey shake it baby oh yeah let me see how you move yeah I know and you live right by that construction site too that must have been a pain in the ass I really do there's jack hammering going on 24 7 over here and i ain't talking about in the bedroom stop it hey i was thinking about your dentist more so oh yeah not dr abrams this guy this guy

drills more than uh this guy drills more than Exxon Valdez. Yay! He stuck the landing, folks. I had to think of who that was. If they ever do a sequel to Armageddon, and they need someone to drill an asteroid, instead of an oil derrick crew, they should get Dr. Abrams from Gentle Dental, my guy,

and send him up into space. That would be awesome. What if, yeah, what if it's like, oh, my God, a tiny comet is coming. We have to get somebody who can drill a tiny little hole in it. It's the size of Tim's tooth. It's not a threat, but we want to drill it. We want to drill it anyway. What do they do?

I've never seen Armageddon fully, or I have it a long time ago at a sleepover and i wasn't paying attention what what's going on they're drilling look holes the logic is that it's easier to teach oil drillers to be astronauts than it is to teach astronauts to drill a hole and uh okay yeah there's a great um ben affleck commentary for that where he's clearly drinking. Oh, yeah. And he just. Oh, yeah. I think we played this. And he talks about confronting Michael Bay and being like, that doesn't make any sense.

And he's like, shut the fuck up, Ben. Just shut the fuck up. And it's a crazy actor just talking shit about his own movie's premise. And then they released it on the commentary. Man, it's on YouTube. It's so fun. It really made me like Ben Affleck. Of course.

I don't know, man. It doesn't make sense to me. And he's kind of roasting the movie. And doesn't he kind of, if I'm remembering correctly, do the voice like, oh yeah, we need to get oil drillers to go up to space.

I think we watched that clip when we were recording Armageddon. On a Zoomer. Oh, yeah. When we were talking about Armageddon. Yes, yes, yes. There you go. Perhaps.

Armageddon, another one of those movies that has like a stellar supporting cast. Like Twister also has like a stellar supporting cast. Like Philip Seymour Hoffman and shit. Is that the circular wind movie? Yeah, it's a big brown circular wind. Yeah, it's thecular wind movie? Yeah, it's a big brown circular wind Yeah, it's the circular wind movie Brown circle wind

Let's just call it Twister Thank you very much I had something really funny to say About Armageddon, now what could it have been? Hit it my man, just say it But it's lost Don't be shy To the sands of time

It's not that I'm being shy. Although now I am feeling... You're being coy, that's for sure. He's being hard to get. It's like that. Is coy and shy the same thing? I swear I thought... Coy, you know what you're doing. You're saying, I'm not going to say.

Oh, I can't have another sip of this Paloma. Yeah. I don't know. Is that coy? You're doing of this Paloma. Mmm. Yeah. I don't know. Is that coy? You're doing it. You're doing it. Yeah.

I'm coy? The coy boy. That's cool. Being the coy boy? Yeah. Oh, wait. You're on a date with somebody. You're not one of those coy boys, are you?

I don't know. I don't know. I'll never say. Well, you seem like you definitely are one of those coy boys. Oh, can't be sure. What's the deal with you coy boys? We don't want to say. I wish they would just say why they're coy.

Why won't they say? Then they'd cease to be coy. All right, coy boy, go away. All right. Hey, we're drinking a Mexican drink. Yeah. And I know we've done the, we had a little South of the Border talk

because we've done the margarita on this show. But have we talked about Mexico? Have you guys been to Mexico? I've never been. Yes. A couple times. Jeff, you went to Cancun, right? Yeah.

I mean, my parents like to vacation there. I've been there like twice with them. But then also as a kid, my grandfather was from Texas and New Mexico. And so when we were visiting New Mexico, we took a trip down to old Mexico. Was this Skipper Dan? This was Skipper Bill. And no, it was not. Was it Poompey and Wee-Wee?

Yes, it was Poompey. No, this was just Grandad. Wee-Wee had already died. And I went down and, you know, I don't remember too much of it. I was probably in, like, early grade school, but I do remember going to a marketplace. I think we might have talked about this on the Zoom room, but I remember it being, bartering was uncomfortable for me. That was on the podcast you mentioned that, yeah.

I was such a little capitalist. I was like, I don't know how I feel about this bartering. No, I'll just pay. Can I have one penny off? I'll just pay it. I have one penny off? I'll just pay it. I'll pay more if you want. I went to Cabo once and had a great time, but early on, I feel like if you're a tourist, you're going to get people are going to spot you as a mark,

and they're going to try to sell you some stuff. But I think I maybe especially look like just a big fat American tourist. And I was really getting hassled at the, uh, I got like in an altercation, my first like one second in Mexico, a guy was trying to sell me a timeshare and I was like, I don't have time. I had a little hissy. Oh, you know what it was? I was walking into the airport with Jessica and I was trying to get a cab. And it was like the cab company guy was like, I'll sign you up for a cab. And also, do you want a timeshare?

Like he was trying to swindle me for a free cab for the timeshare. And when I screamed that I didn't have time and he's like, oh, I'm wasting your time. And he was offended. And I thought I was like, oh, am I being a coy boy? Am I being the bad guy here coming to his country and screaming in his face? So then I apologized, and then he tried to sell me another timeshare. I'm flattered that these people think that I can afford real estate. In those situations, I just act like a coy boy and go, oh, do you want a timeshare with your cab ride?

I don't know. Maybe I do. I'm not sure. And then you're just kind of getting in the cab or you drive away. Buying a timeshare apartment could be kind of fun. I don't know. I don't know. Maybe I do. I'm not sure. And then you're just kind of getting in the cab or you drive away. Buying a timeshare apartment could be kind of fun. I don't know. I don't know. Exactly.

Maybe. Call me. I was at my resort. I was checking in and they were like, why don't you have a seat over here? And I got another timeshare pitch before I even got into my hotel room. I just threw a little hissy fit. Those are tough to be around. I just threw a little hissy fit. Oh boy. Those are tough to be around. I've never had this experience.

I know there's a lot of comedy about timeshares and how aggressive they are and how they don't let you go. Once you're in a timeshare, they really got you. It's tough to get out. I've heard of some people who have done the little timeshare meeting that

you have to sit through and had it got like a good deal on like a vacation afterwards yeah like it worked well that wasn't like a scam or something you just got to stick to your guns and say no my parents have done that like they'll sit through a presentation eat a free breakfast get a free night at a hotel and then not buy the timeshare but i just always wonder like they wouldn't do that old spiel if it didn't if they didn't sell timeshare so like in that moment when i was like at my hotel just arrived in mexico and hadn't checked into my room yet and they try to sell me a condo they wouldn't do that if it didn't work sometimes so how weird is that that some people probably are like oh yeah so i'm in room 222 and the pool is open until 8 and, yeah, I'll buy a house.

I like the cab ride and that timeshare was pretty good. I'll try this hotel timeshare too. Yeah, I don't go in on that stuff. I feel like my grandmother,hare my grandmother uh grandma this is eleanor my mom's mom uh she had a timeshare at a place called steel hill resort oh and this is up in uh new hampshire and it's just like it's one of these places it's got like a dope pool area and there's tennis courts and uh we enjoyed it but it does seem like my parents can't escape it like uh as i got older i heard all that stuff like well parents can't escape it. Like, uh, as I got older,

I heard all that stuff like, well, we got to use it or what are we paying for it for? Um, and then like when she died, it was like passed on to the kids and now they're all just sort of like, well, somebody's got to use it.

It just always seems like this fiasco. So you're like joylessly playing tennis and golf and swimming. And I was like, Oh, we got to get this done. It's cool. But it's like, they are just like,

Oh, we got this week or two weeks up there. It's like, well, somebody's got to use it. It's cool, but it's like, oh, we got this week or two weeks up there. It's like, well, somebody's got to use it. Karen's got to use it. Oh, Diana's got to use it. Karen? Karen throws a little fit at grocery stores every once in a while. I'm kidding. Did we...

Jeff, didn't we say at a timeshare in Vegas that... Palm Springs. Yes. Oh my God. That was my aunt. Aunt. I say aunt, I don't say aunt. And I say aunt when I'm talking about insects. I say, when I was moving to LA for the first time, my, my aunt said, well, Hey, uh, I have a timeshare in LA. You could, you can use it. I think it's one of those things that's like a network of places and she can stay like anywhere for X amount of days.

And I was like, great. Yeah, sounds good. Because we don't know. We all, all of us, all the birthday boys and other friends, Randy, Eric, moved out with no place to stay. We were just like, we're moving out there. We're going to figure it out. So I was staying at quote unquote L.A. Turned out to be Palm desert club, Trinidad,

which is a solid two hours. It's pretty crazy to motel, a Palm Springs motel, two plus hours from LA. And when we were looking for houses and looking for jobs, we would then go to bars. And when the bars closed, I would drive back to Palm desert.

That seems insane to me now, dude. I did that with you. Cause I was crashing on a friend's floor. And then I'm our second night in LA. We were like, we had been looking at, uh, apartments during the day. And then we're like, let's go to the bar from swingers. So we went to the Dresden. Right. And, and I remember we stayed until it was closed. It was like last call, they're closing down. And then we were like, okay, let's go home.

And I got in your car and we went out to, we drove two hours out to the desert and slept at Club Trinidad. Let's go home. But wasn't, Jeff, wasn't there a Vegas thing that we stayed at? Yeah, more recent than that. We stayed, I don't know if it was a timeshare, but like we were like a few blocks off the strip. It was a resort of some sort. I think it was your thing, Jeff. Oh. I think it was a timeshare, but like we were like a few blocks off the street. It was a resort of some sort.

Huh? I think it was your thing, Jeff. Oh. I think it was. That's just one of the things that, one of those many opportunities that come my way as a man of influence, you know. Damn.

Man. Well, you're just one of those guys. The Dutton family has their timeshares going on all over the country. I don't know if you can pin that one on the Duttons. I forget where that came from. Oh. I'll tell you, it wasn't me. I mean, to quote Shaggy, it was not me.

That was the trip that I stayed out with some other people who won't name because maybe they don't want to be named. And we stayed out gambling until the sun came up and I went outside and I was so pissed off that it was... That the sun was up? That the sun was up.

I was so angry. When it was. That the sun was up? That the sun was up. I was so angry. When you get close enough to the door that you see the sun, you're like, I did what? Yeah. Oof. It was like 7 o'clock in the morning. Yeah, but you made $100,000 that night, didn't you? Oof.

No, I wish. Yeah, he was so excited that he made that $100,000. But then when he saw that sun come up, it just really soured him. Yeah, that was dumb. Remember also, i got in a little screaming white match with one of those guys on the street with uh handing out flyers because at that time when we were in vegas that weekend jessica was on a big billboard on the strip remember that that was so awesome that was that was a big like part of the trip yeah because

she shot like an mgm commercial or something and then they put up a big picture of her out on the strip, and we're like, let's go see her. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And I was videoing on my phone, and the very moment we rounded the corner, we're like, there it is. A guy got in my face. He was like, hey, 241 at the club.

Hey, here you go. I'll get you hooked up VIP. And I was like, get the fuck away from me. This is my future wife's billboard. You weren't coy at all with him. You were quite direct. Yeah. I said, dude, I'll fucking bite your cock off.

Get that thing out of your pants. Get it out of here. And then remember him, you know, that look on his face as he sadly unzipped, sadly lowered his slags. Oh, this is going to hurt my way. This is going to hurt my wang. This is going to hurt. Not again.

I love my dick. Well, speaking of nights out and things, and speaking of a tequila drink like this, this is a... We haven't done a tequila drink in a little while. Not in a while. In a while. It's good.

It's good. It's great. This is getting better, by the way. Not better. It's just getting less intense with the salt flavor. Do you think that that's that Beatles song? I've got to admit it's getting better. It's getting better.

Is that? My Paloma's melting down. Yeah, something like that. That makes sense now. Now, Tim, Mike, if you're like me, you have the leftover fever tree. I already put mine in there. On the side, yeah. That's a nice, this lets me know i made the right move is that i i like the fever tree but in segment three

coming up i'm gonna taste test side by side the fresca and the fever tree and see if oh that's gonna be something to stick around for folks i'll do some side by side by side is good but let me ask you this about fever tree. I've had their tonic and their soda and a couple other things. They, but I haven't had the grapefruit. What's cool about fever tree. That's a fancy brand of soda that is specifically made as a mixer for alcohol. Yes. So when you, when you sip that fever tree, I'm wondering, as a guy that doesn't have any fever tree here, I'm wondering if it's made extra strong. Maybe it'll be like... Oh, the way that ginger beer is like...

Yeah. Interesting. Or the way that a mixer, like a margarita mixer on its own, is way too much. Very interesting. I mean, it seems pretty good just right out the bottle to me.

I don't care for it out the bottle. I don't really like squirt, and I don't like Fanta or Fresca. Fresca. Folks, you heard it here first. You know, I don't like that stuff. Hold on. I got way off track. We're talking about, we're drinking a tequila drink.

We're talking about going out and about and being at bars and things. Did I tell you guys ever about the time that, you know, Mike Mitchell, famous from the Doughboys. Tomorrow War. Tomorrow War. He's a guy on a movie screen these days. He and I were out at a bar. Not the Sunset Strip where you would go, Tim. That's my domain.

Somewhere in LA. It was kind of like off the beaten path. Kind of a cooler or rustic-y type bar. Not you rustic. Not you rustic. Rustic-y. We walk in and there was a uh mumford and sons band was sitting there oh my god those guys the actual band they're sitting there cool so mitch and i just got there but it looks like these guys had been doing uh shot tequila shots

for a little while they were a little bit like louder than everyone else and it it seemed like two of them, two of the Mumford and Son guys, the main guy, and then I'm not really too familiar with the band, the let's say banjo player. One of the sons. Mumford and one of his sons. Mumford and one of his sons. We're just kind of like arguing about something. It was clear that those two guys had some sort of beef happening.

And I were sitting there watching them. And it's all maybe a few too much tequila shots. That can kind of happen sometimes. And they start arguing. And I was like, Mitch, this is pretty cool. So I pulled my phone out. I took a voice memo of these guys. Awesome.

And let's see. Jeff, I think you actually have that if you want to play Yeah, so this is I got a little bit of the argument that was going on I can't wait to hear this Say that you are sorry man You just knocked my new jacket on the floor

I think you're a liar man It was on the ground when I think you're a liar, man. It was on the ground when I walked in the door. I'm gonna slap you in the face or maybe I'll just slap you on the neck. Well, you keep taking all my stuff. I ought to leave and you pay the whole check. Cause it was not your salt but mine.

And then you went and stole my lime. Smashed tequila in my eye. Then you spilled my beer. Then you spilled my beer. I ought to kick you in the spine or dip you in a vat of slime I should mash your face in grime And maybe bite your ear

Maybe bite your ear Oh, beautiful. Wow. Yeah. Damn. So, right, there was some things things being said some accusations being thrown around these guys just couldn't get on the same page with each other and i think they worked and you and mitch saw this yeah saw it and recorded it recorded it right place right time yeah it's

just so cool that the two of you witnessed this that yeah it's nice to get the little piece of tape for the the cute little podcast but i'd rather those guys do have a better relationship those guys are vicious man it's it's scary when like when two men are like screaming you know threats like that when you're that bad you want to you want to dip your friend in slime right yeah one guy wanted well yes and then the next guy wanted their face in grime that's like but tim you don't understand like you know there was a the salt there was a whole thing with the salt there was a whole thing with a, and then the next guy wanted to put... They're facing grime? That's like... Grime! But Tim, you don't understand. Like, you know, there was the salt. There was a whole thing with the salt. There was a whole thing with the lime.

And then a beer got spilled. So this isn't coming out of nowhere. It's like, yeah. And then I spilled my beer. The one guy threatened, and I wish I knew the name of the guys in the band. One guy said he was just going to leave and make the other guy pay the whole check. Well, it's like, you know, you're all making a lot of money. These guys are fine. If Mitch

and I recognize you, you're probably a millionaire. We don't know the lowball stuff. You don't know the lowball stuff? No, we don't listen to bands that don't have a ton of money. But you know what? It's like, you don't stay rich if you go out paying for

everybody's drinks all the time yeah right and buying double because you're spilling them all over the place right so they're i don't know i kind of see it both ways me too i do too and i'm glad you said it's cool that you and your friend mitch witnessed this i wish that like in some way mitch could have been involved in this episode or something but he i guess he was there night. It was cool just knowing that he was there and not saying anything. He was there. I said, do you want to come on and tell the story with me? He said, he refused.

Okay. He said, I don't really want to get involved in your, like, again, cute little podcast. Mitch has a great singing voice. I hope that someday we could like get a track from him and hear him sing. But in the meantime, I'll settle for Mumford and Sons. Yeah, he does have a good voice. Well, hey, that's my cute little story.

I loved it. Well, guys, what do you say we go make another round and then we'll come back and we'll fucking evaluate this thing coldly and calculatedly. I kind of love that plan. Oh, Mike. What? That's how I'm going to talk now.

That's going to get you cast in something. You start talking like that. Careful. Careful. You're going to get yourself cast. Why do I fucking love this idea? I got to say, for me, I'm kind of like, this idea of yours, Jeff, I'm like obsessed with it.

It's actually kind of amazing. Oh, God. I'm like obsessed with it. It's actually kind of amazing. Oh, God. I'm obsessed with Jeff's idea. Folks, we'll be back. We'll be right back. Hey, folks, we're back with our final thoughts on Palomas. Who wants to start? I'll start.

Order again. I love it. It's a classic and it's a drinkable at any occasion. Hot summer's day like this is especially good. And here's my tip. I just made a second round uh go light on the salt go heavy on the lime folks yeah always heavy on the lime over here nice uh i did more or less the same thing uh i was thinking right after i made this i was like

oh i should have tried mezcal because i got mezcal here too oh yeah look at this beautiful squirt bottle have you ever seen such a nice looking bottle of squirt it's twisted and then and then the haritos is a nice one too it's delicious as well there was uh i used to have one of those you know they used to take like a soda bottle and heat it up and like twist it so it was like it was kind of like a little kitschy thing a little kid could keep in his room yeah i used to have one of those and like twist it so it was like it was kind of like a little kitschy thing a little kid could keep in his room yeah i used to have one of those and i thought it well for about a year i thought it was the coolest thing i've ever owned yeah i'm i'm loving it you know i i dare say it it gives a margarita run for its money i i do like a taller longer sparkling soda type of drink than like

than like a sharp little tart margarita guy. Yeah. I think you might be onto something. I love margs, but you got to be in the mood and I'm only having one or two. This, I want to order this like at a baseball game and pound them all day. Yeah.

And also, I'm making mine to specs. And both times, I felt like I wasn't adding enough soda. You know, I said, just 100 milliliters. Okay, I'll do what you want, IBA. But hey, there's a textbook for a reason. It worked out nice. And I'll say, the only place you're going to fuck up is if you get a bad grapefruit soda. You got a lot of options.

Find something you like yeah because i'm going back and forth with the fresca and the fever tree man oh man the fever tree you want to hang out with it the fresca you i'm sick of it almost immediately and you're right it is the nutra sweet it's the fenny lalaneen or whatever yeah it's fakey they should make fresca that has calories so that it's good but instead it's only diet look at this this so that it's good, but instead it's only diet. Look at this. This is that. It's only the Albertson store brand, but this Italian soda. Yep.

I think if I made a round three, I would use this because it really tastes like fresh pink grapefruit juice. What does it say? What's the... Organics. The actual label says. Organics is the brand.

Organics is just like their store brand, but it's... No, I know, but what's the... It says pink grapefruit flavored organic Italian soda. They're mimicking a kind of Pellegrino vibe. And Pellegrino has one too, a grapefruit soda that I bet is fantastic. And then also I read online that Whole Foods has one of those, like a big liter bottle of Italian grapefruit soda that's supposed to be good for mixing.

I got to do the Pellegrino one because I've told you that's my lazy man's Tom Collins I make all the time is with a limonada. That's good. Lemon soda by Pellegrino. If you get their grapefruit one. And for me, this is an order again.

I'm very pleased with this. I like your idea, Jeff, about it being better than the margarita. I might get on board with that. Yeah. This started off a little too strong with the salt and it all kind of watered itself down.

Thank God. And, uh, geez, I'm going to sound like a broken record here, but I will say this could be another brunch drink. It could, Mike. It could. It could.

We are in some weird groove here. Could it be another brunch drink? I don't know. Oh, the Koi boys like it. Maybe it could. Maybe it can't. We won't say. We should start promoting the podcast episodes with like,

next week we do the penicillin. Could this continue the streak of brunch drinks? Yeah, real tough, intense thing. Will these guys drink for breakfast? But if it's a hot, you know, sometimes you say brunch, that'll be nice. And then they sit you outside and it's hot and it's sweaty. And that's when you get this because this is, it's refreshing. When it's hot, hot, hot, this keeps you cool, cool, cool.

Cool, cool, cool. Yes, yes. Well, hey, tell Buster Poindexter. My drink keeps me cool, cool, cool. I don't do this often on the show, but I'm going to keep drinking the podcast drink into the night. Me and Jessica are going to watch some Viva La Bam later. Maybe I'll get drunk. Wait, so you finished Jackass?

When you get on a kick, you really get on a kick. So you finished Jackass, now you're on to Viva La Bam? Yeah, you know what's great is I've been watching, by myself, I've been watching Sex and the City. Like, as a reference point for something like i was writing a kind of a uh sure okay a thing where i was like i should have seen sex in the city if i'm gonna write something like this i'll be watching sex in the city by myself and then jessica comes home and then it's like i'll turn off sex in the city and we'll watch jackass it's so funny to be like oh my, my wife's home. I'm not going to watch

Sex and the City anymore. I'm going to flip over to Jackass. Now, are you going to take it all the way up through the season where I think it actually, it's not even a season of Viva La Bam. It's a show that is about Bam getting married. Oh, yeah. It was its own spinoff, right? It was like its own season. If I want to be

really sad, I'm trying to keep it to the Dickhouse productions, but I could do Celebrity celebrity intervention bam margera and go down a dark dark path till he'll flip dewey part the story of bam and jade and what's her name jen or jill or something like that yeah yeah jen but we're well, you finished all of Jackass and the movies, but we're going to do the, you know, the Big Brother videos and then the CKY videos. It's all leading up to Jackass 4 this fall. Oh, yeah. And maybe we'll watch the dudes.

No Wild Boys, huh? I watched Wild Boys when it was new. I mean, I also watched Viva La Bamba. I remember Wild Boys being kind of boring. I kind of agree. I just, especially then when it was new. I mean, I also watched Viva La Bamba. I remember Wild Boys being kind of boring. I kind of agree. I just, especially then when I was in college, I didn't care about like nature so much. Like in particular, like the iguanas and ostriches

and like the stuff that they kind of fuck around with. I was like, I want skateboarding and like being a crew of dudes in the city doing dumb shit. Jeff, it's that attitude that is why we are in our climate crisis right now. I think I do love about wild. One thing I remember wild boys making me laugh with was how they intro the scenes. It'll be Pontius and Steve-O and like, they don't know shit about wildlife,

but they'll be standing by a Cobra and they'll be like the Cobra nature's deadliest biter. Cause it's just a matter of time to someone's getting bit in the crotch and that's all they need to happen but they have nothing no idea what to say at the beginning of a segment was a jackass or wild boys were fucking Steve oh put like a fish hook through his cheek and then like swum around like bait Oh like with a shark. You know, that's Jackass. Oh, my God. The movie, too.

Well, yike. Love those guys. Yeah. Come on the pod, guys. Defend yourselves. Folks, that's our show. Follow us on social media at the Sloppy

Boys, where we release these recipes ahead of time. Also, be sure to check out our Patreon where subscribers can unlock the Sloppy Boys blowout, our weekly bonus episode, and not to mention

the new monthly Questions for Lenny from Mr. Mike Hampton. Yeah baby, now we're getting somewhere. We are in full swing, baby. Three tiers for you, waiting for you at Patreon.com slash the Sloppy Boys. Three tiers, it reminds me of

when I'm having one of my crying fits. Oh yeah. Yeah. One of your hotel hissy fits. Folks. Thanks for listening. We'll see you next week. Viva La Bam.

Don't forget to use propane. Give it up for your boys Give it up for your boys Give it up for your boys