The Sloppy Boys - 46. Bud Light Seltzer Retro Summer Variety Pack

Episode Date: September 3, 2021

The guys crack open the beverage giant's new Retro Summer Tie Dye Pack, comprising three flavors-- Cherry Limeade, Blue Raspberry and Summer Ice. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hey folks, welcome to the Sloppy Boys where we take a deep dive into the drinks that you love. I'm Jeff Dutton along with Mike Hanford. Oh, I feel like I can reach out and touch ya! And Tim Kalpakis. What is up? And we're your hosts, the Sloppy Boys, coming to you live all together once again. I can reach out and touch you. Yes.

I won't because of COVID restrictions, but... You can give me a little touch. Show me around. Well, Mike's in town, so we're all in one room. Can you believe it? I love it. This is the way podcasting was meant to be. Three people sitting around. In the old days, you know? Yeah. Not zooming.

What? Like our forefathers. That's when a podcast was a real podcast, you know? Yeah. Well, what do you think of me here? Are you annoyed? Well, what do you think of me?

What do you think of me? I'm here. Are you telling me my fucking face? I'm not enjoying the smell, I can tell you that much. Oh, yeah. That's a new thing for me. The stink.

Mm-hmm. Constant stink. But here's the thing uh because we're in person you get a perk you don't normally get on zoom is i gave you you guys a couple of cheese sticks didn't i you did sorry uh cheese sticks for those of you who may have heard cheese steaks oh in philly they're probably like, oh. I had a cheesesteak. My flight getting here was so late. I had time to get a cheesesteak at JFK Airport. From where?

I don't know. This little fucking kiosk area. It wasn't a great experience. It took a long time. Not at D'Angelo's. No. It was like the Brothers Cheesesteak or something like that. That's a good family to be buying a cheesAngelo's. No, it was like the brother's cheesesteak or something like that. That's a good family to be buying a cheesesteak from. It was this thing where you're supposed to order,

and then you're supposed to pay over at some other cash register and then come back. It was like a big bank of eateries. And I'm just waiting there. I didn't pay because I didn't know what I was doing. And he's like, okay, number 404. I was like, that's me. He's like, you got to pay first.

I was like, well, I'm not going to stand in a huge line while my food gets cold. He said, I don't care. Oh. Not my problem. As long as I get the top dollar. Oh, he said he worships the almighty green green. Yeah, yeah.

He said the bottom line is most important to me. He thought you were some sort of green green money machine. Yeah, I know. Well, no, I was to the right person. I overpaid to the cash register. Well, but you flew direct. Flew direct. Oh, my God, I'm envious.

Got to fly direct. Oh, yeah, you just were home. Oh, yeah. In New Hampshire. Yeah, New Hampshire, you don't go direct. Do you call it when you're there? Do you dance around and call it the shire? Like, Frodo Bay?

No, we kind of, Mike, we frown on that, actually. Oh, fuck. Don't fucking box my ears, dude. What type of Shire is this? Hamp! It's old? No! Hamp! Okay, well.

No! Okay, I'm heading back to California. Good luck with your Shire. This was dumb. No, you can't fly direct to New Hampshire, at least not to Manchester, where I'm wanting to fly in. Is that by the sea? Go ahead.

Sometimes. So, my trek home, not so smooth. I wish I had cheesesteak troubles. So, you were on a flight, there was much turbulence. That's to be expected. Some storms were on a flight. There was much turbulence. Much turbulence. That's to be expected. Some storms going on.

They had me. The plan was stop in Charlotte, get on a new plane from LAX to Charlotte, Charlotte to Manchester. Simple enough. Stop by Charlotte. Have a few laughs. That was just a layover, though. You made it sound like they made this plan up in the air. No, no, no.

Yeah. This is the plan. This is the layover. So we get to Charlotte over the airport, delayed in the air. No, no, no, yeah. This is the plan. This is the layover. So we get to Charlotte over the airport. Delayed in the air, as they call it. And then they were like, don't worry, folks.

We're delayed in the air. That means your connections are probably also delayed. No sweat. But the time keeps ticking. And we're running out of gas. Oh, no. So what do we do?

They say, folks, it's your captain. We're going to go land knoxville and refuel and then go back to charlotte oh man so so not we're gonna land in knoxville and then figure things out for you folks it's like just refuel and then go back and this isn't like i hear knoxville and say okay this is gonna be fun we're gonna see johnny and the boys yeah yeah they're gonna fly around the room and ham johnny knoxville and this is the refuel or something um so the connections are fucked for a lot of people and we're we're finally getting down into charlotte we land and i we all get alerts on

our phone saying you've been given a new connection and mine is for 8 30 p.m and i think hey i'm okay a lot of really upset people on this plane uh for like the next day or two days from now and then i get off the plane and i see a massive line at customer service i'm like well good oh ouch boo to you and so i get in that line and i'm i'm on my phone trying to do like as much as i can do there i don't have all the options so my goal is to like i'm gonna wait in this long ass line and then maybe they can get me into portland maine all i can do on my phone is manchester or boston and I'm not doing much better than the flight they gave me. It's three hours standing getting through this line, but they do get me into Portland, Maine the next morning at 11 a.m.

So I do have to like stay the night. And I'm like, great. Give me the hotel voucher and no harm, no foul. And they said, well, 19 flights have been fully canceled. There are no more hotel vouchers. No, no. What? You print them out.

Yeah. I'm like, you must have a deal with someone somewhere. Yeah. And so I'm like, okay, I'm mad. First things first, I need to pee and eat right now at the same time. But so I grab like a... It's too bad you're not a piss freak because it could have killed two birds with one stone. God the same time. But, so I grab like a... It's too bad you're not a piss freak, because it could have killed two birds with one stone.

God, I wish. I'd give anything for you to be a piss freak. It's too bad. In this situation. So I'm wolfing down a sandwich, and I'm looking at all the hotels. What'd you get? Turkey? This was a buffalo chicken sandwich.

Okay. I'm looking at all the hotels that say airport or like charlotte airport additions because i want a shuttle they're all booked up everywhere but i found one shining light on a hill in a conno lodge in the opposite direction i said and they had room and i booked it right there and i said now all i gotta do is get to it and so i fought through their um shitty uber and lyft situation like all airports have now with a dying battery oh yeah and a guy finally picked me up and this is me like running back into the airport to like charge it for for like precious minutes and then running back out we're going to the econo lodge and this guy says you know we're joking around having a

good time i can tell that he's warming to me okay and he says you're like a son to him he's like hey man just so you know don't open your door for nobody this is a bad part of town iconology yeah man yikes and i was like i'm from la it's probably probably not a problem i can sniff it out and i'll make it through the night i get out and um there's some shady characters everywhere i go inside the ceiling is dripping into a bucket the lobby is fully dirty this is like this is like a uh clark griswold coming into a hotel it sounds like oh it's bad and and i see that the the only guy in front of me in line is like really arguing with the staff. And as I get closer, I start to notice the staff is acting a little strange.

Well, were they quirky dudes? Oh, they almost can't stand up straight and are pawing at their noses and fighting amongst each other. We got some serious fucking meth heads on. Working the econo lodge lodge a man and a woman irritable very irritable start yelling at me before i even really get the last thing they want is a little la boy coming in there yes yes hey i'm fresh from the coast clutching my laptop bag my laptop bag in fear hi i've got to edit the blowout and i'm like okay i hey i'm jeff i booked a room online and they start typing they're like someone's in your room and i was like okay is there anything

else available well then that must not be around my room and then they're like give them any room a clean room just go and they're yelling at each other they give me cards and they're like building four i don't know where building four is it's one o'clock in the morning there's shady characters everywhere i'm wandering around the dark looking for building four i find it it's on the second floor it feels like a fucking boiler room i get to my door it looks like it's been tampered with like somebody has crowbarred in at some point the cards don't work i go back to the lobby this like crackhead behind the desk gives me new cards he's like bobbing and falling asleep it's insane the new cards don't work and i decide i'm not trying this hard to stay in the worst hotel i've ever seen in my life yeah so with my dying like five percent battery i call an uber and a

lift and i'm like one of you please get here before my battery dies and i went back to the hotel uh i went back to the airport and slept in the terminal. Wow. No, after all that. Wait, did you pay for the room? No, because, okay, here's the funny thing. I realized at no point did they take my debit card. So it was like a reservation but not a booking. Yeah, and they probably should have swiped something at some point, but they were too cracked out.

You guys got to swipe something. But, you know, sleeping on the tile in the terminal, like families are there, like people with elderly family members just sitting in chairs trying to sleep. Terrible. That's why I always, always, always travel with a sleeping bag and a cot.

And a candle and a nightcap. And a Tempur-Pedic sort of sealy posture. But hey, My sleeping gown, sleeping cap. With this episode brought to you by American Airlines. Ooh, he's naming names. Damn. Wow.

Hey, American Airlines, you fucked up, and now we're going to fuck you. You owe Jeff a voucher. Yeah. Here's what you do. Next time you find yourself in a situation like that, buddy up with a jolly, funny, fat guy like a John Candy type and get across that country on your own, you know? Yeah. Take to the street. But I will take care to say, first of all, tell me everything there is to know about your wife.

Before I embark on anything with you, your wife is a lie. Yeah, no lies. I want to know everything. Truthful. And he's like, um, to me she is. You know,

maybe this won't work out. I'll find my own way. Wait a second, you're not a coy boy, are you? Your wife's alive, isn't she? Well,

maybe. She might be. In a certain strange, weird kind of a lie. Why are you hugging me from behind and talking to my ears? Stop that.

Stop it. Well, I'm happy that we're all back safe on the western coast. Oh, yes. The place that's the home of... Booze News. Hit it. We just figured out... Booze News. We just figured out... Booze News. We just figured out booze news. We just figured out booze.

We just figured out booze news. It makes me want to fart. Listen up, donkey lips. It's booze news. Hey. Nice! Drinkalodion by Steve LeGras and if you've got a booze news theme email it to thesloppyboyspodcast at gmail.com. What do you guys think of all that?

Those Nickelodeon shows that was expertly strung together but the Salute Your Shorts and all that stuff do you got a lot of nostalgia for that was that your era because i feel like it was maybe either a little before my time or after my time but i kind of missed it i remember seeing salute your shorts a little bit it always felt like i would tune in and be like i don't really i feel like i should be knowing more about this show or something i didn't't get it. Yeah, it was... You weren't immersed in the world. Yeah, I wasn't immersed.

I liked Rocco's Modern Life. I thought he was funny. Sure. Oh, yeah. I like Doug. Doug, yeah. Pete and Pete was my favorite. They were really...

They were weird. That was great. I mentioned on the blowout last week, there's a documentary on Hulu on Nickelodeon, kind of like the rise and fall, the whole thing, called The Orange Years. That's really good.

But Salute Your Shorts, to me, felt like an older siblings show. Like my friends with older siblings would watch like Hey rise and fall the whole thing called the orange years that's really good but salute your shorts to me felt like an older siblings show like my friends with older siblings would watch like hey dude and salute it was a little more like bathroom is it salute your shorts were from from this song when i was like and it makes me want to fart yeah yeah that was bud nick said that because i would get a writer pay the price bud i feel like at that age i would have loved that and i know and i should have been tuning in to that. It's kind of working on me now, man. Do you remember You Can't Do That on television? Yeah, that was real gross-out stuff.

Another really gross one where the adults kind of had that Tim and Eric-y, like their faces looked wet and red. Yeah, I remember there was a lunch... Who was it? Maybe the guy, like the cafeteria guy or something was making gross food. Or the bus driver. I don't think it was a school bus driver or something. Because I think their founding premise

I mean not to brag but I did meet with Nickelodeon when I was meeting for the job of head writer of the All That reboot. Did they slime you? They slimed me good. Slimed me right out of the room. reboot. Did they slime you? They slimed me good. Slimed me right out of the room.

But they kind of explained the whole thing with Nickelodeon. The founding premise is just that we're not Disney. So it's like, we don't have to be nice, and we don't have to teach a lesson, and we don't have to inspire. We're just trying to be funny. And that's why that new All That was so funny. They're like, Tim, we know kids think boogers are funny.

So now we show boogers to kids. Yeah, and then I told them, I was like, why don't you get a look at my nostrils? I got a few in there right now. I'm like, this is good. This guy could actually really work out. This could work out. Weird. Yes.

Are you afraid the dark made me scared? Me too. I thought that was good. I think the general nostalgia of this Nickelodeon booze news theme is going to tie in where we're going later in the episode with our drink of the day.

Oh, nice. But first, I wanted to share some booze news with you guys. Okay, great. Which is that, well, autumn is right around the corner. Oh, yes. Bring out, get the sweaters out of storage. And, you know, as the leaves change and there's a nip to the air. Pumpkin's getting plump.

But I like the green. There's no more greater symbol of the arrival of the autumn months than the release of the Bud Light Seltzer Fall Flannel Pack. Yeah. Woo-hoo! I'm talking four flavors. Apple Crisp. We recognize that from the...

Yes, an old friend. Maple Pear. Was that Holiday Pack that was... That was in the Holiday. Yeah, yeah. Maple Pear. Maple... Sounds like a soundboard. Delivered with the same gusto. Maple Pear. That's the the holiday. Yeah. Yeah. Maple pear. Maple. Sounds like a soundboard.

Delivered with the same gusto. Maple pear. That's the first time. Very interesting. Pumpkin spice. Hey, the classic. That sounds. PSL.

When I was a coffee man, pumpkin spice season was my Christmas. The whole season was your one Christmas morning. That's right. And finally, toasted marshmallow. Ooh. Ooh, okay. That's the weirdo, like, peppermint patty this time around. Yeah, yeah.

I like that they're sticking with this theme of bubbly waters that are going to taste like baked goods. And we're going to have to get to the bottom of it. It's funny. As you were reading those off, I was like, oh, that sounds good. That sounds good. And I forgot they're seltzers. They're bubbly seltzers. They're waters with bubbles in them.

But they're going to be a tumble. I'm curious about maple pear. Like, because, you know, just as a flavor in the world, that sounds very appealing to me. I like maple stuff. Tim, I got to tell you, this is not a knock on booze news. You're doing a great job. Thank you. But the problem is with Bud Light seltzer.

I have seen these out in the wild, so this isn't the newest news possible. Wait, you've seen the actual flannel bag in person? I could have had a sip and I said, no, no, no, I would never get ahead of Nod. That's so early. You should get it though because they might go fast. Yeah, but the problem is that Bud Light has,

let's just say they're not overthinking their seltzers. They got too many flavors coming out too fast and distributors don't they're not going for every little thing it took us forever to get our hands on the retro oh and during getting my hands on the retro i went up to i you know this thing about distributors they're these weird mysterious middlemen i i saw a guy loading up the beers at uh ralph's supermarket and I went up to him and I was like, hey, do you have any Bud Light retro tie-dye packs? And he's like, I don't do those. And I was like, oh, he doesn't do the Budweiser.

He's like the Miller guy. And the Miller guy comes all the way in to the store and loads the beers right up onto the shelf. Interesting industry. You ever be in the supermarket and you see somebody stacking some shelves and they don't work there, they work for, like you're saying, the distributor? Yes, I've had a similar experience. Believe it or not.

I was thinking of my story. Well, I'm jet lagged. Yeah, jet lagged. Yeah. Yeah. That's what it is. And you go up to that person, you're like, excuse me, can you tell me

where the soup aisle is? And they're like, I don't work here. Yeah, yeah. I was like, well, you look like you work here, so don't look at me like I'm fucking nuts, man.

On the other end of that, though, I love it when the guy that does work at the store, I'm in like aisle two and I'm like hey where the light bulbs and he's like aisle 17 that's cool that is cool I love when you I wish I had that kind of swag yes when they ask somebody at the store and they know exactly where it is but I also like when they have to kind of look at the signs and be like aisle nine

you go there and sometimes it's there sometimes not but and the tricky stuff is stuff like light bulbs because it's always like oh i think it's on the end cap in like 14 15 or 16 yeah yeah thanks a lot dude you know yeah if you go to a supermarket and you're looking for light bulbs or like tape it's like yeah they have a little uh a little home office section but it's not like a ton of tape you're looking for one slide it's not like a ton of tape. You're looking for one slide. It's not like a tape aisle. Damn. One square. Well, I'm excited that we got our hands on it finally.

Great job, Tim. I'm excited. The packaging looks cool. I saw a little sneak peek. The packaging looks pretty cool. You guys are talking about the seltzer of the day. I was talking about the booze news seltzer. I'm talking about the booze news. I day. I was talking about the booze news seltzer. No, I'm talking about the booze news. I like the plaid look.

Oh, thank you. Oh, yeah. Just talking about- Hey, as a plaid-wearing guy for your whole life, plaid can come in a style, into style, out of style. It can be on the runways of Milan and Paris Fashion Week. I was big in the grunge era, then that went away. I was big in the-

It circles back to you. So do you feel a connection like, I gotta really... I do. I like the look of plaid. I think it's a cool look. It's a good look. Yeah. Me and Al Borland. Oh God. I can see the fucking fan mail now. How do you feel about gingham and madras and things that are plaidesque but not

really plaid? See, I don't know what gingham is. What's that? Gingham kind of looks like a picnic table. Oh. Nah, not for me. More like a check. Yeah. And Madras is sort of like pink, and it's from India, but it's kind of more like preppy and vacation-y.

Have you ever been anywhere on the others? Not really. More like an Easter pastel. Yeah. Oh, I see. What about buffalo plaid? I don't know what that is. I like that.

That's red and black, right? It's just like only red and black, pretty evenly spaced. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm more of a scotch plaid? I don't know what that is. I like that. That's red and black, right? It's just like only red and black, pretty evenly spaced. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm more of a scotch plaid. Ooh. Scotch plaid. Mike, you do that Buffalo plaid. It could be good.

Look into it. Hey, Mike, what about... I might have something like it. No, get like a Carhartt jacket, and then you'll be one of these cool guys, you know? You know, I'm currently talking to somebody on Depop about a Carhartt zip-up that I had when I was in fucking high school that was so awesome. And I found, I think, the same exact thing. It's just a little slightly different color.

Don't know if I'm going to go for it. It's 50 bucks. Ooh, Hanford, love that for you. Thank you. Also, you should get yourself a Burberry. Yeah. Like Emma Watson. Yeah, I should do a Burberry.

And maybe a Louis Vuitton. I should do a Beret in general. Yeah, great. Okay, well, here's what I want to say, too. I should do a beret in general. Yeah, great. Okay, well, here's what I want to say, though. As I wrap up Booze News. I got one more Booze News thing. I got a thing about the plat and the flavors. Then you go now, because that's the topic at hand.

For the fall stuff, I don't like that they're getting back into Jelly Belly flavors. I'm excited. What, the toasted marshmallow? All of them. What, Maple Pear? What I like about what we are going to discuss later shall not be named the retro tie-dye pack those sound like good flavors shall be named yes it's exciting because i don't know how much he's going to police me

no people who listen to this pod know we're a little cynical of the seltzers and we're not all we're not going to do an episode about any seltzer that comes out we've been tracking bud light the closest and today's drink of the day hit us it we were interested in it so we had to do it but you're saying with these these uh the autumn one they're getting back into kooky town yeah and you know like like tim said i'm going to echo that we don't love the seltzers we just put the entire premise of our podcast aside anytime they come out with a flavor pack because it's undeniable and this is what i was getting at guys i said you know fall is coming by definition that means summer is ending am i right you're not wrong now today is uh the we're leading into a labor day

weekend am i wrong it's not wrong and In Labor Day, well, technically not. The calendar end of summer is often seen as the end of summer. Am I wrong? Is he wrong? So I want to circle back and say, if there were ever a time on this pod to name the drink of the summer, which we've been tracking, we didn't really have concrete results. yeah which we've been tracking we didn't really have concrete results but we should take a look now and say look cnn and reuters say that the the hard seltzer craze is ending sales are down i saw other blogs being like eh the sales are down from what they were but like white claws still going strong blah blah blah and i know that while we have on this pod, we've tracked the espresso martini.

I've seen, we got to the bottom of that. I, what did I, I've seen a lot of Paloma's around. I've seen a lot of chilled reds. I've seen the Cosmo is back. I've seen variations on the spritz.

I've seen variations on the Negroni, but as much as I wanted there to be some huge, overall spritz type hero of the summer. I have to admit the parties I went to, the bars I went to, the beaches I sat on. Apple thingy. It was the generic hard seltzer summer still.

Yeah. Not White Claw 2019. Right. But people were talking, whether they're interesting people or not, or whether they're long-winded blowhards, you were saying, Topo is pretty good,

but I actually don't really like Truly. There was the conversation. It's because there's so many of them. You can't avoid them. There's so many of them, and it's a conversation piece. I don't even know if anyone likes them. I don't know if I like them.

I think I like them. You like the Seltzers. I think I like them too. I don't even know if anyone likes them. I don't know if I like them. I think I like them. You like the seltzers. I don't like the seltzers. I told you. And also, this is like, the seltzer is like one of those songs where you're, I'm trying to think, like, hanging by a moment. Do you remember that Lifehouse song? Hanging by a moment.

Like, that was sort of on indie stations for a while, and we were like, okay, enough of that song. And then it crossed over into the mainstream. So I feel like even if we're getting sick of seltzers, I feel like we got a long train ahead of it getting out to more normies. Because there just is a market. I'm a drunk? The splash already happened, and the splash has subsided,

but it's like a part of life now. Also, that music thing, that's interesting. I mean, of our our listeners are very hip and young and gen z some of them are one year old but yeah they shouldn't be listening unfortunately they're missing out on a cool thing that we had where you'd hear a song on like the indie radio station yep like peter bjorn and john and you'd say that's been big on this indie station for a while And then a month later You turn over to K-Rock and you hear And you're like

They're just getting going on it Peter, Bjorn, and John Here on K-Rock With Kevin and Bean They can't believe it Kevin, Bean, Peter, Bjorn, John John and you Would you guys agree or do you was there

a drink that you would say was the drink of the summer i don't think that we thought maybe for a while the freezer pops would really take off no i saw nobody with those at all i don't even think they sold any of those uh yeah i'd say the seltzers were from what i saw big i'm gonna make a prediction for summer 2022 log it in right now beer is back no that would be great carby frothy people are drinking it you know what i uh got into a little bit this summer ipas no talking about being late on the bandwagon i would be if i go into a bar and i saw the taps i'd say i'll try that ipa i i do think that i don't see a ton of seltzer out at bars like i think it's the retail drink of choice easily i'm surprised i do see them at bars though i do see them like

fancy bars will be like we have the kettle one like the pink grapefruit kettle one seltzer and stuff like that. Okay. And also sometimes like on, on bar rescue, Taffer will be like, and you got the Taffer hard seltzer fridge. And then it's like a, like a red bull fridge with the glass and you can look in and see the flames. That's cool.

I mean, I guess I don't know. I went to bars six times and I got COVID. Taffer. Yeah. You got booze news.er. You got booze news. Go. Got a booze news. I'm turning this into a booze news because I didn't get in when we were talking about Pete and Pete.

I was at a fish show once and I'm up on the side. I see down on the floor seats. Who do I see but the younger Pete? And this was before the show was starting. So the lights were up and people were chit-chat. I was like, hey, Pete, Pete from Pete and Pete. And he looked up at me like, you know, don't say that right now to me. I'm trying to have a little fun.

So that's my little booze news. And let's wrap up booze news. And are you guys ready to get into the drink of the day? Yes, finally. I'm ready. I'm steady and ready. Wow. I'm ready.

When you think of the Bud Light Seltzer Retro Summer Limited Edition Tie-Dye Pack, what do you think of? I think of a tie-dyed shirt. I think of a prize well-earned. That's what I think of. I think so, yeah. That's a good point. You were on this case for longer than I was on Pepsi.

Yeah, if that's possible. Man, that was amazing journalism on your part. Well, yeah. So we heard about this, and we wanted to do it because we were intrigued. And then what happened? I drove around, and we heard me drive around all these places and strike out. Like four or five spots, not... Four or five spots, yes.

All over the place. Then I got a text from our friend Alan McLeod. Four or five spots. That reminds me of the story of the saddest jaguar. So they like having more spots. Yeah, it's more dominant. Do you ever see a jaguar with a bunch of spots not smiling? No, that's a very good point.

I have gone way off topic here. Go ahead, Tim. Alan McLeod. Alan McLeod texted me and said, buddy, look at this. It was a picture of the tie-dye pack at the Ralphs in South Pasadena. So I said, oh. You know, revved up the T-Bird, put the top down. Yesterday I zoom

out there. They're sold out. This is where I asked that distributor guy about them and he said, I don't fucking know. What are you, some fucking podcaster? But I do know where the light bulbs are. I got into my car, went to the next closest Ralph's, nothing. Went to a third Ralph's,

found it, boom. So we got them here today. 24 pack? Or 12 pack? 12! That's what I meant to say. The flavors are Cherry Limeade. Sounds good. Delicious. Blue Raspberry. Also sounds good. Summer Ice.

Ooh, that's interesting. Like, what's that going to be? We don't know. It sounds like a gatorade flavor where it's like glacier free yeah exactly frost or i'm guessing it was like italian ice and then they're like oh too ethnic oh let's go a little more seasonal um but these flavors like what do you guys think wait one more right yeah wait what did i say no there's only three there's only three how's that wait let me go grab them. You guys talk amongst yourselves.

Okay. So I thought the whole thing with these seltzers, you're always going to have four flavors. Wasn't that when... Three! What? There's only three! Interesting.

So now I'm thinking they got wise and were like, hey, we couldn't nail a fourth flavor? Ditch it. Because they had repeats. Remember, there was one flavor in the cranberry that had previous previously existed yes yeah yeah so they said they're tapping out but so we never got a hold of the no we did get a hold of the out of out of office yeah so this is we did ugly sweater and out of office um so far none have been um winners yeah I feel like I liked

cranberry yes or I was okay with it and then when they went off on flights of fancy with the baked goods like apple crisp or whatever or peppermint we marveled at their flavoring abilities but at the end of the day you're like you know why

do you do this yeah but it was exciting because like wow know why do you do this yeah but it was exciting because like wow this really tastes like gingerbread yeah but it felt like a prank gingerbread yeah it felt like the jelly belly jelly belly potter pack novelty bernie botts beans but this one is interesting to me because with those flavors in mind yes this is called retro summer tie-dye pack and i'm thinking tie-dye is a funny thing because tie-dye is relevant to three eras right you get the 60s woodstock hippies booners that's tie-dye yep then in the 90s comes back dave matthews woodstock 94 type vibes tie-dye is back we're in tie-dye the yuppie hippie

and it's still it does have echoes of the 60. We were knowingly throwing back and it was back in style. Right. Now the last few years, 2021, but really like maybe 2019 or so when tie dye got big again, I don't really think of it as a retro throwback. I almost just think of it as a look, like an aesthetic. Yeah. I don't think Bieber's listening to Jefferson Airplane. I'll tell you that.

Maybe he is. He probably does. He does a lot of of music twice removed from the 60s but yeah i don't know for us do you think they're even throwing back the 90s or do you think they're just like this looks nice i think it's i think it's throwing back to the 90s but with even less sort of uh yeah allegiance to what it stands for when it first i feel like when i first saw it it was like maybe like 2017 or 2018 there were like runway designer fashion shows with like grateful dead really right like like and it's specifically like grail grateful dead shirts were the first thing that came back and then grail like grail in the like depop sense. Oh, it's tough to find. Holy Grail. Like the Lithuanian basketball shirt or whatever.

Like originals and stuff like that. Yeah. And then it kind of... When they became like pink, you know, then when you get to like Jason Sudeikis wearing a tie-dye hoodie at the Emmys or whatever, that's not based on anything.

That's just like, this looks cool. It's just what they sell now. I feel like it was last summer and specifically this summer is when you're seeing a lot of tie-dye but it's not the classic 60s swirl with super saturated colors it's the sort of washed out crumple right look of tie-dye like that's the sort of urban outfitter z zoomer look right now yeah it's not a big spiral it's like harder to pinpoint and i remember not last summer it was

pre-covid i was at paul and leslie arfins and she she knows how to tie-dye stuff yeah and i happen to have a white t-shirt in my car and she was like we're gonna tie-dye stuff for the kids and i got really excited got my white t-shirt one for me too you too teach me get to work and don't teach me just do it and i wanted to do a classic sort of sunburst one and i noticed that leslie and all the cool people were kind of doing the crumple yeah you don't see too much of that spiral sunburst anymore yeah and that's what they're drawing from on the fucking seltzer pack yes what are they and this is my point. This seltzer pack, they said the word retro. Yeah.

And then when I look at these flavors, thinking of these three different eras, when I think blue raspberry to me is a 90s flavor. Yeah. Yeah. Everything was new. Like new blue Froot Loops, blue M&Ms. Like we figured out the color blue. We figured out blue. Sour Patch Kids even maybe.

Cherry Limeade. I don't know. I guess Cherry Lime Ricky is like a 50s, would be more of a 60s thing. I don't associate cherry. Do you guys have any memories of Cherry Limeade? I've never had cherry in my life. And then Summer Ice? We don't know.

Summer Ice does sound like a late 90s, early 2000s. Yeah, like a... What are those? Like Jeff was saying, the Gatorade Ice or Forest or Fierce or whatever. Are they... The freezer pops that you push up? Are they like flavor? Flavor ice? Flavor ice or otter pops?

Flavor ice. Yeah. Yeah. Maybe, maybe it'll be like that, but that's what's funny is like tie-dye is like a sixties thing and it's a now thing, but this kind of feels like they did a, maybe they're trying to do a nineties pack for us. They're trying to be the, they're trying to do wet hot American summer. Yep.

I think what they're trying to do is put the numbers in the algorithm and seeing what's selling. You're so cynical, Mike. You don't think that their hearts are in this? Bye, bye, bye. They're doing the NSYNC to us. I'm picturing that the Anheuser family in St. Louis is just dreaming up what they think is going to help mankind the most. I think so, too. Maybe I'm wrong.

Well, are we done with the chitchat? Can we take a break and come back and crack these bad boys? Absolutely. Jeffy wants to get soused. Let's do it. Folks, we'll be right back. Folks, we're back! I propose that we drink them in the order from left to right that they're listed on the box.

Okay. Where I read them, which would be cherry limeade, blue raspberry, summer ice. Well, then I'll have to get started. Very cool. Love the look of the cans. Yeah, the cans look cool. This is appealing. You don't want to peek at doors, man. the word seltzer is squiggly yep kind of freaking me out oh everything's squiggly mike your face is squiggly man hey and look even on the side they they have even more uh braggadocious

names chill cherry limeade groovy summer ice and blazing blue raspberry oh blazing like yep oh okay right because groovy is 60s chill is anytime right now and blazing is uh saddles like johnny blazing all sips. Okay. Down the hatch with chilled cherry limeade. Cherry limeade, okay. Oh, shit. Tart! Hold on. Hold on, I've got a problem here with that. Okay. Now I'm gonna go.

Tangy! Yes! You think it's tart and tangy? I think it's very drinkable. I'm actually, I'm not responding negatively. I'm merely saying the notes. Because what my gut instinct actually is, rather than trying to make my water taste like a baked good in the winter, all these flavors already sound very appealing to me.

And this does have a lot of flavor. But yeah, like it's summer. I'm having fun and it's hot. Something like sour and refreshing. This is like appropriate. Yeah. Yeah. And it's not sour. It's like the way a Sour Patch Kid is sour.

You like it. You like the sour. You love it. I think the word does apply to a sour patch. No, but sour means, oh, I don't like this. Oh, my attitude is sour, I think the word does apply to a sour. No, but sour means, oh, I don't like this. Oh, my attitude is sour, I think. Yeah, this is pretty good. It's got a little tinge of that artificially diet-y taste.

I get lime, and then I get grenadine, and then I get fakiness. Yeah. I will say, from the get--go this is much better than the stay at home pack agree i think that uh all these flavors gonna lend themselves well because they've always sort of been artificial to us yeah like we've had fake cherry flavor our whole lives sure and i'm liking that fake cherry like the aftertaste just in my mouth as I'm burping and belching is cherry. It's pleasant. It's like a,

a rocket pop, you know, it doesn't feel like it's like coating my mouth either. Rocket pop. It's like candy. And it is nostalgic. Cherry popsicle. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. This does have a popsicle taste, but not a sour popsicle. It's like a sugar-free popsicle or something. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah popsicle or something with a little saccharin to it. Sort of implacable, though. If it didn't say cherry limeade on the thing, I don't know if I would be able to place that. Now, the can is red and green, and the

green tie-dye makes me think of a little tie-dye story I had on July 4th. I was walking through Prospect Park, hanging out. There was some barbecues going on. I was seeing people. And I walked by this one stand. This lady is selling tie-dyed shirts, among other knick-knacks.

And I was looking at two of them, a green one and sort of a purpley one. And I'm like, hey, I'm going to get one of these. How much are they? $20. Which one looks better? This one looks pretty good. looks pretty good the purple one yeah yeah you'd look great in that okay maybe i'll go with the green one oh you would look great i was like you don't care what i get and she was like no i don't care i was like okay here you go and uh she copped to it yeah she didn't care then i wore uh i wore it out once on a run. Got very sweaty. Went home, took it off.

My whole stomach and chest was green. Yeah. Stayed dyed for about a week. And I showed a friend of ours, Ben Axelrod. He was in town. I was like, Ben, I'm actually, I got some medical stuff going on. I pulled up my shirt and it really shocked him. He thought I was...

I have a tie-dyed gut. Yeah. I said, Ben, no, I'm just green from the dye. Yep. I've had that wear... It's a good shirt, though. Good fit. That tie-dye shirt that I mentioned earlier.

I was afraid to wash it with my normal clothes. Sure. Because tie-dye, it's real dye. You don't want to put that in with your BVDs and your beefy tees. You know what I don't like in the tie-dye world these days? It's been happening for years, but brown. Brown I don't like in the tie-dye world these days? It's been happening for years, but brown. Brown tie-dye.

Brown tie-dye. Brown tie-dye. You know, it's like... I get that accidentally a lot. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's the worst. You buy a nice, clean, white pair of underwear.

Then a few hours later, you look down, there's brown tie-dye in the back. Yeah, something startles you, like the smallest startle in the world. Yeah, the NASDAQ loses one point. Yes. Okay.

Your pants are brown. I hate that. Shall we move on? Let's. Yep. Also, a thought to hold in your head is, you know how I always say, pour your hard seltzers out into an icy glass? I think that would be the thing for me.

I'm not gonna, but just as a thing to hold in your head. What's next? Blue raspberry. Blue raspberry. Razzle dazzle razzy berry. Blazin' blue raspberry. And there's no G on blazin' and there's no apostrophe either. Oh.

Ah, blazin'. Blazin'. Now, I hope this tastes super artificial, stingy, like the teeny. Now, the smell of the cherry lime I like, the smell of this, it's not exactly what I want. That's what I'm looking for. I want that fish. Are you up?

Oh, yeah, baby. Well, nose be damned, this is good. Sorry, schnoz. Sorry, schnoz schnoz will you get back seat today what was it reminding of blue raspberry i'm thinking maybe like a an icy at the mall yeah a big blue icy yeah it's just that artificial uh like that doesn't taste like a blueberry really it's so funny. Or a raspberry. It's funny because they could nail the peppermint thing so well, but then this doesn't taste like a real raspberry. Because they're not going for the fruit.

They're going for the flavor. The raspberry flavor that we've known, we've come to know as the candy flavor. But what's the most famous blue raspberry thing? Are there airheads that are blue raspberries? Maybe. I think of like candy and popsicles. But you remember Teenies? Those little... We talked about those before. Those little plastic guys.

Those were just like sugar water flavor. Yeah. This is good. This is good. I will say... And I could spot this. It would take me a second to be like, oh yeah, fake blue raspberry. But I could pin this. Is the seltzer clear to be like, oh, yeah, fake blue raspberry. But I could pin this. Is the seltzer clear or is it blue?

I can't tell in the can. I'll pour some out a little bit here on the floor. Then I'll slip in it and sue your ass. It's a very light blue. Oh, interesting. Looks like in like a certain bad TV shows or movies, if like a mad scientist was working on something, his test tubes would be filled with this.

I got news for you. Cherry Limeade was kind of red. We didn't know. All right. I will go as far as say this is good. I would hold it for the end. Two for two. What a funny thing, because it's not like good out in the wild with no context.

It's good if you're a 90s kid. You know, it's like good. It's good if that flavor means something to you. Yeah. But it's not raspberry. It's this other thing. We should find a zoomer and feed them these and see if they have any of the same positive associations we have. We could get a boomer and have them boss us around

and think they know everything. Why don't you guys buy a house? Sure, I'll buy a house and I'll shove it up your ass, boomer. Whoa. Well? Yeah, some of the places we could afford would fit up there. The market's so fucking pricey. I bought a house so small it fit in my parents' ass.

That's the housing situation in LA. That's me for me. Okay. All right. Shall we get into Summer Ice, the question mark? Yes, the question mark can, they call it. This is the most thrilling. Okay, so this is another kind of a red and green...

Groovy summer ice, they say. What the fuck? This is funny. The color is very much the same as the cherry lime, just a little darker. For the can, the can. Whoa, it's a big swing. Nose be true. I'm not sure I'd like to taste this.

I can't place what they're going for. Ooh. Me neither. Nose be true. I'm not sure I'd like to taste this. I can't place what they're going for. Woo. Me neither. It kind of like doesn't have a taste, and all of a sudden it does. Perplexing. What could that be? Summer ice. I looked at the ingredients thinking there would be a tip, but of course not.

It's like steamy water extract. It's got water. Would you call me crazy if I said it had a tobacco finish? Yeah, I would call you crazy. I'm not going to say that. Now, tobacco can kind of get ashy in certain contexts. Yeah. What does it smell like?

It's got like a hidden scent. Now, let's really try here because I'm trying. Bud Light, no, I believe you, but I'm saying a challenge for them is like three smart adult men should be able

one of them at least should be able to figure out the flavor you're intending. I'm close to something on these big whiffs I'm taking. It's like a default to cherry or fruit punch. I was going to say strawberry. We think maybe a strawberry's in there? It's reminding me of that salty one in the out-of-office pack.

Salty is salt. The margarita, classic lime margarita. Groovy summer ice. What's groovy? Cannabis? Cannabis is groovy. It can make you feel a little groovy. Austin Powers, he himself, I don't know if he was groovy,

but he saw things and said they were groovy, baby. I think he was groovy. Lemony, maybe? Yeah, I'm definitely leaning more citrus than berry. Is it watermelon? Watermelon and sour apple? See, watermelon would be a smart one for them to have said.

Sour apple as well. What are they hiding, Bud Light? What are you hiding? This is really weird. I have no idea what it is. Summer ice, a pop, a popsicle, a flavor ice. What about a rocket pop where you're having all three flavors at once? The first match I found on Google, foodsided.com,

they're writing an article about this pack, and they break down each flavor. They say, summer ice might become the summer barbecue must-have. The combination of lemon, cherry, and blueberry make it the perfect pair for a food off the grill.

That kind of sounds like the Rocket Pop. But blueberry? But like lemon, cherry, blueberry sounds like the... Yeah, but lemon, cherry, blue, raspberry. Yeah, I know. Oh yeah, so Rocket Pop.

All three flavors of Rocket Pop at once you you deep throat a rocket pop and you get them all or you mix cherry limeade with uh the blue raspberry and you probably get summer ice interesting yeah i do but the ice does make it you're right with uh somebody said it being ice ice pop popsicle rocket pop and i am i'm not necessarily getting that exact flavor, but I do think this tastes like a popsicle. Popsicle-y, yeah. They all kind of taste like a popsicle, but this one the most. Yeah.

Ooh, I'm excited to rank these because I will. Ooh, ranker. Another site says, the aroma has fruit punch notes with lemon, cherry, orange, and berry all present. Orange? Cherry airhead. Somebody else said. I'm surprised they didn't attempt creamsicle. These all

have an airhead quality. That's interesting. Creamsicle would be good. Airhead, I'm definitely thinking airheads on all of these. I love airheads because they're like, they're more like food. You chew them up and you get full off of airheads. It's like a gum you can swallow. They're weird. Should we take a break and come back for ranking time? Yeah, I need to off of there. It's like a gum you can swallow. They're weird.

Should we take a break and come back for ranking time? Yeah, I need to think of this. Folks, we'll be right back with our final thoughts on the Bud Light Seltzer Retro Summer, what is it called? Bud Light Seltzer Retro Summer Limited Edition Tie-Dye Pack. I die back. And we're back with our final thoughts. Tim, kick it off.

Well, for me, I overall enjoyed this. Who's to say what's good and what's bad in life? I am but one man and things are subjective, but I liked the concept. I like the art. I like the aesthetic. I like the way that they're making us think. I do feel some nostalgia. Retro Summer Pack, they

succeeded. It worked. I would say that I like the Cherry Limeade. That's my number worked. I would say that I like the Cherry Limeade. That's my number one. I would say that Blue Raspberry is my number two. And I thought, oh, I'm nostalgic for Blue Raspberry stuff. Maybe I'll go eat some Airheads later tonight. And Summer Ice was not for me, but I do think it had a Rocket Pop-esque quality.

So overall, these are big swings. They're weird. They're conceptual, but it's kind of my favorite of the weirdo Bud Light packs. There we go. There we go. Tim, I'll follow that up and say I ranked them exactly the same. Yeah, baby.

But they're all pretty high. They're all pretty good. And it reminds me of, I want to say smirnoff had a rocket pop flavored interesting seltzer and uh last summer i had a bunch and yeah it's right up in line with these i've seen that at albertson's bud light kind of ripped them off huh oh boy well i mean it's anyone's game does a smirnoff ice does that have kind of a lemony flavor or a sour flavor? Don't know. I haven't had a true Smirnoff Ice in a while.

This was like their seltzer-y. If you guys ever come to a party with me, I'm going to ice you. Don't ice me, man. You're getting iced. But this feels like I'm sad to see these get lumped in with the steady drumbeat of questionable Bud Light Seltzer packs. Like, this should stick around. This isn't weird. It's funny and it's fun.

And I don't want them to go back to Harry Potter jelly bean style. You mean the fall flannel pack? Yeah. Well. Maple pear? That's it for me. Well, it all comes down to our little ashy boy. Well, well, well. Who thought one of them tastes like

tobacco? These are good. I like the look of the pack a lot. I like that they bounced back from the out-of-office pack, which I did not really find a winner in that one for me. Now, Mike, can I just

interject? You're saying these are good. You're not just saying in the context of other seltzers or other seltzer packs. You're saying these are good. You're a guy who gave a negative rating to a margarita. You gave a negative rating to a Moscow Mule. Some staples, some of America's most beloved cocktails, you've had them and said, this sucks. Mimosa. Doesn't like it.

Well, I rank things, my mood is a big part of it. My mood is big. And I'm in a good mood here. I'm with you guys. This is fun. I'm out in the sunny California. When I'm in New York or something,

if, hey, look, I had a bad ride on the subway train or a rat crossed my path. Pizza rat, though. Pizza rat would be nice, but he's few and far between. Then I go up to my apartment, we record a thing, put whatever you want in front of me. I hate it.

This is the right context. Dog days of summer leading into Labor Day weekend. If you're going to drink these, even if you don't like them, it's a conversation starter around Labor Day, no? It definitely is. And they're refreshing, I'll say that. My ranking goes the Blue Raspberry, the Cherry Lime, and then the Ice. So it was your guys basically, but just flip the first two.

The Blue Raspberry, I think, is good, good. Cherry Lime is good for one of these. And the summer ice is just, I can't put my finger on it. It's confusing. It's a little confusing. Is summer ice not so nice? Because they've made such a name for themselves in like, can you believe it tastes like exactly what it says on the can?

I wish they called it rocket pop if that's what it's supposed to be. Pick a flavor and then impress me that you hit the flavor. And wish they called it rocket pop if that's what it's supposed to be. I'm like, pick a flavor and then impress me that you hit the flavor and also, give me a fourth flavor. Yeah, come on. Give us a fourth flavor and it would hit the groovy.

Pink lemonade. Oh, pink lemonade would have been great. Pink lemonade is smart. A fucking layup. They blew it. And even in this groovy context that like stoner thing,

they should have said like melted rocket pop. That would have been that kind of worked. Right, right, right, right. Yep. Took too many tabs and accidentally left the rocket pops on top of the

freezer instead of inside of it. Did I ever tell you about the guy in my town who had acid tabs in his pocket and it rained? We don't have to go into that. Well, the guy in my town had a whole sheet he put under his shirt. Yeah, Jeff, what about the guy in your town? He put it under his tongue. All the whole thing?

But they all turn into a glass of orange juice if i could give one giant negative note and this goes for most hard soldiers i've had give us less flavor you know what cut the flavor in half who what favors are doing doing by making so much taste happen you're trying to keep it under 100 calories. Yeah, Bud Light, stop trying to make taste happen. Like LaCroix. You just made taste happen. Drizzly? Did you just order a Drizzly?

You made taste happen. But that's what the ice is for, baby. You put these on ice, they're probably fucking great. True. Yeah, that's true. Put them in the deep freeze. You know what I would do? Use these.

Let's say you're making a cocktail that uses soda. Use these instead. Very nice. How about vodka soda in the soda? Summer ice. That's good. I like that idea. And, you know, the vodka is, you know, Belvedere.

So I say, yeah, my attitude is up on the Bud Light Seltzer funky backs now. Me too. And now it's up to the flannel back to fuck it all up. Yeah. Geez. I wonder if they're going to do another Christmas one or if they're, what else? Yeah.

And, and I wonder for us, does this, is this the end of the trilogy or do we continue to do whatever they throw at us i think we continue to do because we've gone this far and every time they've announced one i'm like that's a good i'm interested the fall pack is a it's a funny enough it's it's compelling because you don't do fall stuff usually no you don't with water right and i maybe the out of office one was the one that i wasn't likeped on, but it did make

sense. It came out around spring break. It was cocktail. They were trying to do Mai Tais and stuff. But I would have liked just Mai Tai. Instead it was like Mango Mai Tai. But that's life. And sometimes life can throw you a little... Jeff, make sure you put some nice music on it.

Oh, he's done. Jeff, make sure you put some nice music on it. Oh, he's done. I thought he was going to keep going. Jeff, make sure you keep that music short. There you have it, folks. We think that this was an improvement upon the out-of-office pack. We didn't go all the way to saying it's good. We wouldn't say that you should necessarily ingest. It's not Cosmo good,

but it ain't Russian mule bad. It ain't Cosmo good, but it's Kramer good. That's our show. Follow us on social media at The Sloppy Boys where we release these recipes ahead of time.

Also be sure to check out our Patreon where subscribers can unlock The Sloppy Boys blowout and questions for Lennon our weekly and monthly bonus episodes. That's patreon.com slash The Sloppy Boys Blowout and Questions for Lennon, our weekly and monthly bonus episodes. That's patreon.com slash thesloppyboys. And you know what's kind of cool about the Patreon? On the Blowout, we also just covered,

we're saying end of summer, we were talking about the song of the summer. This was us looking back at retro, and then we're talking about the fall coming. It sort of behooves you to subscribe. Yeah, get the full experience. There's a full experience. And this month on Questions for Lennon, we got Carl Tartt.

Oh! The very funny Carl Tartt. Nice get. Very funny. I'm going to listen to that. Yeah, me too. And hey, it was a good episode here today with the two of yous. Yeah?

Yeah, this was great. No Zoom necessary, no Zencaster talking face-to-face. Yeah. Breath was great. No Zoom necessary. No Zencaster talking face to face. Yeah. Breath on flesh. Aerosols flying every which way. Goodbye, folks. Later. Check you later.

Give it up for your boys. Give it up for your boys. Give it up for your boys. Give it up for your boys Give it up for your boys