The Sloppy Boys - 74. Monkey Gland

Episode Date: March 18, 2022

The guys increase their virility with a gin drink created in 1920's Paris.MONKEY GLAND RECIPE1.5oz/45ml Dry Gin1.5oz/45ml Orange Juice1 tbsp Absinthe1 tbsp Grenadine SyrupPour all ingredients into a cocktail shaker, shake well with ice, strain into a chilled cocktail glass.Recipe via the International Bartenders Association (https://www.iba-world.com/) Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hey folks, welcome to the Sloppy Boys where we take a deep dive into the drinks that you love. I'm Jeff Dutton along with Michael Hanford. Hi. And Timothy Kalpakis. What is up Pluto TV stylies? Hey, wow. And we're your hosts of the third best podcast comedy podcast on planet earth damn we gotta plug that more yeah no i know it's the kind of the green spots not so much the blue areas you know those are a little more aquatic but on the earth all the green kind of land terrestrial stuff yeah that's where a lot

of the pods are coming from and that's where we excel wait what is wait what does that have to do with the third best on earth on earth oh on earth gotcha gotcha gotcha greens and blues gotcha yes so yeah well and some whites yeah well. Wow. Yeah. That's snow. And don't forget browns. Well, you sound like my proctologist right about now, Jim. Don't forget browns. Oh, sorry, Doc. I forgot them again.

You got to push these things out of there. What do we got going on back here? Well, you got the usual whites, but now you got some browns. How's your toilet bowl looking? Yeah, yellows and lighter shades of yellow sometimes. That's about it. Don't forget the browns. Oh, you're the best.

Oh. Oh. Doc, can't see it by you. Your proctologist, does he do that thing where he takes out a color swatch and he has you point out, what's been going in and out of here? This is kind of gross. Would you recognize any of the colors that come in and out of here point to him on this chart

son and i point to red and he's like oh that's bad i'm like no i sat on an elmo doll okay so that's not bad that's good that's good i guess as long as it's just the elmo doll a little scatological humor up top yeah come on that's not good you don't want to hear that shit shit chat for sure this shit chat is kind of low-hanging fruit uh kind of bottom feeder comedy but if you noticed that this episode was pluto tv stylies and bringing it back to some high brow satire. It's come to our attention that our IFC series, The Birthday Boys,

sketch comedy cult classic is now streaming on Pluto, folks, for free. So watch it. And that's free. That's a free app. Have you guys used Pluto before? I got it right here on the Roku. Have you used Pluto.tv before? It's just like a website. You just go to it and it's a channel.

Oh, yes. And it gives you the feeling of things airing, right? Kind of like things are playing on the app. More than the feeling. It is. Oh. Well, you can have the feeling. Just because it is doesn't mean you can't have the feeling.

Yeah, you have the feeling because it is. But is it on demand? Like you go on there and you just have to watch whatever they have on well there's multiple channels now so it's just like uh you know back in the day you'd you'd you'd go on that one channel yeah yeah and it would have the channel scrolling and you can be like oh great we can watch bones yeah there's bones again dad, they're putting bones on so many channels these days. Well, Mike, it's a fantastic show. No, I want to watch House.

No, no, no. I can't watch House. Like, there's an IFC channel on Pluto with, like, us and Garfunkel and Oates and Bunk and all that. And it's just playing constantly? Yeah. Or do you have to? Basically what I'm saying, like, when- It's both.

It's both, Michael. It's both. It's everything. It's on demand, and you can just be like, hey, what's on IFC slightly off? Yeah. Wow. That's exciting. And now this is a TV show that you two were both on and you loved it.

YouTube we're both on. YouTube. Yeah, did just any of your stuff make it onto YouTube? Yeah, it'll end up there, sure. Have a look. Sure, sure. But folks, check that out pluto.tv and also i believe it's an app get the app like you probably get get that app going on your apple tv on your roku on your sling box that's where they're not and they're

not even paying us for this this is just because we want you to see the old show we want you to see the show they better be paying us huh are we getting nothing off that oh no i mean like on the on the podcast here they're not they're not a uh oh it's one of our favorite sponsors no no no of which we'll hear from soon and god bless them i hope you get all the products and every one of them each better than the last um i uh also i i plugged this at the end of last week's show but now uh the audible original series i directed summer in argyle is now streaming you could get it on spotify or anywhere and this is bob odenkirk wrote it with nate odenkirk and naomi odenkirk produced it's got tim robinson john c reilly it's Cavalcade of Mr. Show stars.

If you like to laugh, this is the Audible original for you. Now, Tim, you're no slouch with a microphone these days. Did you get on it at all? Did you blend your voice? You know I did a cameo up top episode one. Bouge. Ticket person. Ticket person.

Does it sound like Cookie Monster? Do I get some of that sweet Cookie Monster? Yeah, I did kind of the Cookie Monster voice, and I had a lot of fun. We had Eben Schleder of Mr. Show Fame doing the sound design. Oh, yeah. Not just Mr. Show Fame. Birthday Boyz fame as well. Oh, yeah.

So his work's on Pluto TV. Oh, I'll have to tell him. He does the music on SpongeBob as well, but I was playing a ticket person at a museum, and he was doing the sound design, so I was like, hey, make it sound real funny like I'm muffled up in a ticket booth, and then I'd be like, make it more muffled.

Yeah, don't give me one of those crackly microphones. That's my favorite thing to do. Aside from the comedy, to just be picky about sound stuff is so fun. We do that with our albums. We'll record in three days. We'll write for a while. And then polish for three months.

Record real fast and then like bark at a mixer and give them notes for a year. No, no, no. You've got it all wrong. You're ruining our vision. Yeah. You guys need a new prescription. I think that's the problem. You're ruining our vision. Yeah. You guys need a new prescription. I think that's

the problem. You son of a bitch. You say that to us. Prescription? God, you're starting to sound like a New Jersey mobster. We haven't heard from him in a while, have we? No. Maybe someday. Maybe he'll come out again someday.

And hang. Hang with the old gang. Oh, Tim, you should maybe tell. I was interested. You were telling me about how you did the Audible series. You know, you can't get that cavalcade of stars all together at once. No. So you were sort of the common denominator reading across from John C. Reilly and of them tim robinson and all the all the

greats and and then when they stitch it all together they're talking to each other but you were the guy you were the guy in the the nucleus yeah i'm kind of here's what i was with this thing i'm kind of the the master cat burglar i swoop through but then i leave without a trace and so everyone was reading their lines with me okay okay but then when you listen to it i i've left the scene and now oh david cross is speaking to jill tally where's tim he's gone he's gone he's never here without a trace it's kind of one of the one of the many benefits of covid i know we always talk about how good it is but one of the many bennies one of the many bennies is i thought we were going to record this show just in a studio in a week in L.A.

It ended up being months and months of solo Zoom records where an actor would be shipped like a microphone kit and then I would be directing them over Zoom. But the cool thing is like people couldn't get together, so we shipped them the kits. But then you also realize like, hey, if we're shipping kits, these are people. Ship the kit. I'm always shipping kits left and right. Tim, do you want to set up a studio time with Poussin? Ship the kit. Ship the kit and shut up.

S the K. So who's juggling all the kit shipping? This was a very good production team. I always put a stamp on a microphone and dropping it off in the mailbox. We'll take care of the kit shipping. Sounds like a headache. Once you start shipping the kits, you realize this changes the world of casting,

right? Like, David Cross probably wouldn't have been available to do the thing in person anyway, but he was in Toronto shooting something in Toronto, and it's like, hey, we'll ship you a kit. You ship a kit? He wasn't shooting the story of Wendell Clark, was he?

Wendell Clark, the hockey player that played for the Toronto Maple Leafs. It could have been. Yeah, I figured they'd be shooting it up there. I don't even know if they're making that movie, but I figured they'd shoot it up there. If they're shooting it, I don't know what else they would bother shooting up there. Yeah, and I don't know if David Cross is in that they do, that's where they'd be shooting it. I don't know what else they would bother shooting up there. Yeah, and I don't know if David Cross is in that movie,

if it's even happening or what. Yeah. And speaking of movies, I'm actually working on something called Kitschippers Incorporated. So if it comes out similar, hey, any similarity to actual events, Tim, is completely coincidental.

Oh, okay. I can't say you're going to get a piece of this one. I'm sorry. No, I don't want a piece of this. That sounds like your own thing. I mean, you've gone through the trouble of incorporating something. Yeah. I'm doing a thing. This is more of a book that we're hoping

to turn into a documentary than we turn into a movie. Like a fiction, you know, a narrative. But it's called, it's about a punk rocker who wears those big, you know, a narrative. But it's called, it's about a punk rocker who wears those big, you know, Doc Martin boots and he gets this job shipping kits and it's called The Shitkicker Ships the Kits. The Shitkicker Ships the Kits?

Yeah. Well, I guess it's a race to the box office. Yeah, well, for me, it's the publisher. I got to find the box office yeah well for me it's the the publisher i gotta find the right publisher right you're doing the long way around yeah yeah you know i was remembered uh recently and was chuckling to myself is uh have we ever talked here on the pod about uh mitch's uh character flannel guy uh yes never not on the pod i don't think it was one of mitch's uh mike mitchell's many like kind of ideas where it's like, never, I don't know if any of it ever made its way to a script or anything,

but he kind of walked around being like, duds, we got to do that thing. But we had this idea. It was a character. Mitch was a character that was flannel guy and he was like a Seattle grunger who was going to get like zapped into a different dimension. He zapped from the 90s into like a fantasy world where he's trapped by a sorcerer um yeah so we were gonna it was gonna be a sketch runner and then we got no no wait wait he's he got trapped in a crystal by a sorcerer

and then he got released when the sorcerer died of old age it was gonna be a movie where he had to like defeat him he has no hand in his own success exactly nothing that he learns or does uh he just waited out the wizard passes away of natural causes and then it's over he spends the whole movie in a crystal and then and then he's just out i think he wrote he wrote a version of that at some point, didn't he? I think he did. I think he did. I remember a sketch, like a one-page sketch, where it's like the flannel guy's at Starbucks, like bothering people in line, telling them his lore.

Yeah, yeah. But that was going to be kind of like the cold open, and then he goes into it. It's just like back when he wrote it, the 90s weren't that far away. So it's just a guy who lost wrote it the 90s weren't that far away so it's just a guy who lost like 15 years of his life it's like kind of a mild window of time to be missing yeah i wouldn't mind losing 15 but if it got up to like maybe 17 years i'd be kind of sad about that you want those years if you lost 17 years of your life

yeah yeah If you lost 17 years of your life? Yeah. Yeah. Well. Well. Oh, okay. Speaking of Bip time, guys, we got a message from Slophead Nathaniel Lane. Yeah. Not Nathan Lane, but Nathaniel Lane. He calls himself the fan man. He says that he found this Booze News theme on vinyl in the secret basement lab of Lil Thrilla, and he snuck it into his BVDs and sent it to us.

Oh, my God. Hold on. That's wild. So he got into the basement of Thrilla and Benedicto's house, or just Thrilla's house, I guess. He only mentioned Thrilla. Benedicto's house? Or just Thrilla's house, I guess? He only mentioned Thrilla, but... I don't know. Do we let the listeners

in on the world-building aspects of the pod? What do you mean world-building? We just found Thrilla and Benedicto's tapes, too. Yeah, this man found this tape. And I bet you the fan man did as well. He found it. Alright.

Here we go. He found it. All right. Here we go. What is a? Okay, perfect. They're just blobs. What is a? Live and load. Live and load.

Live and load. Live and load. Live and load. Live and load. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh, hello. Remix. Hey, it's us. We're back again. Tell your mom and dad and tell your friends. We're back in the studio and making a hit.

Looking for a drink about an Aperol Spritz. Tranquility Base here. The Eagle has landed. You got your moves, your grooves. You're going for a cruise. You Aperol Spritz. Tranquility Base here. The Eagle has landed. You got your moves, your grooves. You're going for a cruise. You're looking for the facts. You got Duddy and Timmy and Mikey with a... You got the sloppy boys.

It'll all be okay. It's booze news, you fine ladies and gentlemen. Was that really them? I couldn't tell if that was really them? I couldn't tell if that was really them. Imposters. It sounded, well, you know, we hate Benedicto and Thriller, but that sounded awful.

They suck, so that sucks, so it probably is the same. It probably is the same thing because we hate those guys. Yeah, it wouldn't really matter if it's the real them or fake them. Either way, those guys suck even when they're at their best. They suck. I know. It's tough to find. And also, when you're finding vinyls in the basement, it's probably unreleased stuff for a reason. Yeah.

So even those guys didn't release that one. So even Thrilla and Benedicto's bad stuff is oof. Ready for today's top booze news story? Yeah, but what happens if I have a theme, Tim? What if I have a booze news story yeah but what happens if i have a theme tim what if i have a booze news theme you're gonna want to go ahead and email it to the sloppy boys podcast at gmail.com oh yeah what if i forgot the password to my email account well i think it's one two three four five password gulp um okay here here's this is this is anecd This is news that happened to me. Oh, this is nice.

A little bit of news of the weird. Yeah. I mean, I don't want to give too much of a glimpse into my deep, dark personal life, but you guys know I've been tinkering with the Calpe Cordial. Yes. It's a drink that I drink, and I want to get the measurements right. I don't want to just say hey everyone here's my drink i want to be able to to give a nice clear as if i were the

iba list so i've been tinkering in the test kitchen slowly taking my sweet ass time with this drink that is essentially cherry coke with spiced rum in it. Pretty simple. You know, a tinker with other things too. Then, you know when you're taking your sweet ass time and then somebody comes along and just scoops you? Because you've got to be. Oh, shit. If you're on the top of the game, you've got to be producing. You have to be prolific. You can't sit around in the back lines.

Oh, maybe I have an idea, but I don't know. Right. Have you guys seen the batman yes not seen you've heard oh yeah i've heard and seen other versions ah yes well tim you you asked me if i've seen the batman. Uh-oh. There he is. Huh? Is that how Pattinson delivers? Yeah, that's Pattinson. Yeah.

Whoa, take it easy, sweetheart. Sounds like a side character in a video game that you would blow by in Grand Theft Auto. Yeah. Yes, I've seen. I've seen. Jeff, did you happen to see it at amc brand theaters uh yeah i saw it at the americana did you stop by mcguffin's bar at the americana no why well they've been running a little promo drink haven't they because they

want to promote their little film that they're so proud of the batman and they had a a couple of themed cocktails one for cat woman that was like a gin type of a drink and then a drink called the batman and this fucking drink no no Oh, Kraken, dark spiced rum, Coca-Cola and grenadine. I, and I said to myself, I got to try this thing. I ordered it. It was delicious. They nailed it. Oh shit, man.

Now Kraken is dark. It's like a dark black rum, but it is spiced rum. I had been using a sailor Jerry or captain Morgan and you know, grenadine is technically not cherry i guess it's like artificial pomegranate yeah i'm a granite but dig in put put it all together i'm i still might drink you know these things harry from harry's new york bar can say that he invented a drink while the bucks club in london says that they've invented it so tim you just need to have one ingredient different yeah i i kind of do because mine is cherry coke flavor no but it would be probably it was

the thing was that theirs was better than mine that's what i'm really admitting well yeah here's what i liked about theirs it was a big it was a it was a plastic um like a beer size cup so it's a nice big high ball you know when you get a soda thing and it's not strong? And so I was in the movie eating my hot dog and my pretzel and all my dibs. No dibs? Oh, yeah. All my many, many dibs. And something amazing happens with rum and Coke. We know it from the Cuba Libre. Oh, yeah. Stone Cold Classic. I think I'm just going to start kind of a rivalry with,

I love that they call their bar MacGuffins, as if it's like, that's a movie reference, a pun thing, but it's also like, it does sound like a nice hometown pub, MacGuffins. Yeah, it does. Also, wait, just for the listeners at home who don't know what a MacGuffin is, that's something that the characters are in pursuit of. And it's like,

it's like, yeah, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like,

it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like,

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it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like,

it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like,

it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like,

it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like,

it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like,

it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like that lady's going after the money or whatever. And it's like, this is really a film about a weirdo guy. But having the MacGuffin of that money she stole or whatever is like the impetus. Yeah. An object or device in a movie or book that serves merely as a trigger for the plot.

There you go. You don't really want... It's funny because it's kind of an empty term. People will be like, oh, don't worry, it's just a MacGuffin. And ideally there's like an emotional subtext to it that's more important. But I think if you do a good job, no one's going like, oh, that's just a MacGuffin. You know, like, you're supposed to care. Yeah, yeah, you're supposed to care. Rosebud.

They didn't even know they were looking at MacGuffin the whole time. It's me, MacGuffin. There was one movie, I saw a movie that didn't have a MacGuffin, or this one didn't particularly have a MacGuffin, but it had McLovin, which was sort of serving the plot. I've seen a similar movie to that, yes. Yeah. When I was a production assistant at Gracie films on the sony lot i would always see

this um ford mustang with the license plate vanity plate mclovin and i was like i can't believe that guy got uh mclovin his license plate and then turned out it wasn't him just some guy what is his name it's it's three uh chris m. Wait, Tim, before we get too far from the Calbee Cordial. Yes. I remember at one point you mentioned what a Calbee Cordial was, and I was like, I don't think that's the same as what you said it was last time. Well, I was starting to doctor it up with other things, and then after the rusty nail,

I was saying it's so nice to just have a two-ingredient drink that I shouldn't cloudy it. But what I had been doing is a little amaretto just on the top. See, Tim, that's the key. That's the key to making it the Calpe Cordial. What it could be is like everyone knows with a Russian root, it's vodka and it's root beer, but then you get to choose for yourself if you're taking the ice option.

Right. So maybe a Calpe Cordial has something like that in the mix where there are those people. You can customize it. And it's root beer, but then you get to choose for yourself if you're taking the ice option. Right. So maybe a Cali-B cordial has something like that in the mix where there are those people. You can customize it. They can privately decide to themselves if they want to customize with the Amaretto Splash. Well, is there anything that you enjoy, like a liquor or a spirit or something or an add-on that you enjoy that you can just pull a U-turn and throw that in there, and that's the Calpe cordial. You know what you should do, Tim, is like some signature thing that maybe doesn't even change the taste too much. It's like a garnish.

Yeah. Maybe you just, maybe the Calpe cordial, you put a guitar pick in there. Yeah, that's it. Yeah. Don't swallow the pick. That would be like a fun thing. Don't swallow the pick. Don't die.

What if it's a triangle of pineapple, and that's the pick? Like that's representative. Oh, a fun thing. Don't swallow the pick. Don't die. What if it's a triangle of pineapple and that's the pick? Like that's representation. Oh, a pineapple pick. Because he's a tiki guy. Yeah. And I'm a guitarist and I'm a freaky tiki. This is pretty good.

And also, you could just bump up one of the liquors by a half of an ounce and maybe that's like the new part of it. I like that we've decided that this Calvary Cordial

is a runaway train. It has to happen. It has to hell yeah i have to do some last minute rewrites just make sure that i don't get sued on it um i mean i guess i just i'm gonna stick to my guns but i just want to congratulate amc theaters and mcguffin's bar for making a good drink it is good grenadine is good and i'm it may put me in the mood for the grenadine that we're going to have in tonight's drink as well. You know what stinks about the... Yes, we'll keep that under

wraps for now. What stinks about that Batman drink is they made the Batman drink for this movie. The movie's not going to be in theaters for the end of time. We all know that. So the drink is just going to go away and it's going to be like oh well, now no one knows. No one's going to order the theaters for the end of time we all know that so the drink is just going to go away and it's going to be like oh well now no one knows no one's going to order the batman

right i mean and batman's come and go right this podcast is a living breathing document that you can check in on it's just funny when someone does good work like they overshot like whoever it was like amc some guy at amc was like tasked with like promotions and the drink stuff and he was like okay i got this all all like farm this out to some company that comes up with the drink recipes for us and whoever it was they came up with a batman gotta be cracking it must you're probably right it was probably cracking and if you're cracking it's pretty straightforward because we're just talking about rum and Coke, add a little grenadine,

probably just based on maybe this aesthetic of the red letters of the Batman, right? They're like, hmm, redden it up. Blood. I wouldn't be surprised if the person in charge of Kraken, in charge of coming up with that, listens to the podcast. I would love that. It would not surprise me yeah it might be nathaniel lane um but isn't it funny when someone just unexpectedly does a good job you're watching like a bad tv show and you hear

a really good music cue and you're like what are they why'd they waste that here especially probably happens the most with music because there's some really talented musicians working in some very silly places. Thank you. And you'll just be like, Mike, we've got to get you out of that Sloppy Boys. Yeah, man. No, the Sloppy Boys music is the good part. This is the silly place I work. Yeah.

I like this being your work. I've got to go to work. I've got to go to work. I would like to be taking my bass for a walk, but here's what you've got to do. If you're working in a strange place, don't do to work. Gotta go to work. I would like to be taking my bass for a walk, but... Here's what you gotta do. If you're working in a strange place, don't do good work. Yeah, tell the company why. Someone says, we need a drink for the Batman. You say, like, okay, 44 ounces of milk.

You know... The opposite of Batman just a tall white beverage white milk you know what from time to time coming up with movies for us sloppy boys to be in working in a strange place would be a good

title by the three of us working in a place that's a little different it makes the mind real what is this place what's so different about it is it a horror movie could be could be yeah could very well be and then we act like that kind of during the movie audience is sort of like what kind of movie is this and we're like we won't say we won't say starring the koi boy well i have a little piece of tape that I want to share with you. Love it.

Let me, yeah. How'd you come across this tape? This came across, Acast put me on it, and yeah, you just play it. Sure. I mean, I'm a little... The production company got me into it. A little wary of Acast reaching out to you behind our backs. Yeah, they just like me to do some extra stuff

and to get the word out on things. Gale Watch 2022. Hey, guys, it's Mike up here in the Gale Watch 2022 Chopter Copter. I am making the rounds in the city, checking out all things Gale. And we just received some very interesting information here. I'm just going to get it out of the fax machine. Okay, we are getting reports now, and this is something I had no idea about. Gale is 17 years old.

I mean, that is incredible to think of an artist with so many versions of the same song. And is only 17 years old. I'm very impressed. And what makes it even more impressive is that Gayle has always been, compared to maybe Living in the Shadow of Livrod, Compared to maybe living in the shadow of Livrod, of course, Olivia Rodrigo, who had the big hit Brutal from last summer, or Brutal, I barely remember it now. Now, the interesting thing here, for everyone who's been making the comparisons between Gale and Livrod, Livrod is 19 years old. I mean, that's barely a comparison. She's ancient history at this point. To be 19 years old in this business and be shown up so handedly by Gale, it's, well, the data speaks for itself.

I mean, it's pathetic and it's ridiculous, and I'm surprised that Livrod has even attempted to keep a career going in any type of semblance of the word. She's already two years older than Gail and by all accounts failing miserably as we can see Gail is just pushing ahead and making the sort of alternative rock pop world. Her bitch, which we over here at Gail Watch 2022 just think is so fantastic and so exciting. Okay, back to you guys in the studio, guys. I'm going to stay up here in the Gale Watch 2022 chapter copter,

keeping you, the listener, informed on all things Gale. Wow. Wow. All right. Gale. Gale. Gale. Gale. Gale. Gale. Gale. Gale. wow yes so yeah we got more gail gail info coming in all the time. Yeah. I got to say, you know, initially it was like, whoa, you get this cool eye in the sky objectively kind of reporting on Gale. And I feel like the objectivity is kind of slipping away. It's editorial now.

And now it's becoming a little bit more like we're taking sides, it seems like. We definitely, yeah, we definitely took that. Yes, we like Fox News or like a lot of these news corporations. You pick something, you push it hard, and you create a narrative, and you separate people. You try to pit people against each other when there's really nothing there. But yeah, that's what we're doing.

We're doing that. We're doing that. yes oh continue please oh and it's very exciting yes i agree i think it's very exciting i personally you know like it's cool for me because like i do side with gail watch it kind of aligns with my values and everything because huge huge live rod fan but she's kind of old and just long to be two years older than gail just not doing a lot of versions of songs you know like driver's license was i think i heard maybe the biggest debut single of all time and good for you was a giant hit um gail watch mentioned her hit brutal which is an album track not even a single but um she has only come out with one

version of each of her songs gail watch isn't isn't up on all the live rod stuff right that's not their oh that's not gail yeah that's not gail watch's whole that's not gail's thing so i can forgive that but keep going to well i just have one question i mike i think it's so cool akos gave you the money and they're kind of splurging a little bit to give you the chopter copter so and the fax machine and the fax machine that was new this week because it's nice that we don't have to we don't have to land every time we want to you know check in with the fax now it just goes right up into the well that brings up a good point is that like the news was from the fax last week you were kind of going through her tour dates

i'm kind of wondering is it necessary is the altitude is the eye in the sky element necessary part of it anymore a lot of the information you share is kind of what we would just get off Wikipedia, I think. Yeah, yeah. Or, yeah. Well, yep. You know, that has been brought up in several of the staff meetings between me and my staff and with the ACAS people. And they keep saying, do you need this? And it's like, well, we have it.

Right. And we're not giving it back to you. It's budgeted for, and that's it. Right. And we're not giving it back to you. It's budgeted for, and that's right. We, we have the keys, we have the pilot. So that's,

that's that. It's just, I'm like, like this week's get watched. You're lucky you got that fax. Cause otherwise you're just kind of up there, kind of just stuck up there in the sky without what you want. Well,

I bet, you know, he can always glean some information from up there. I bet. It was, it was a boring week until that fax came in this afternoon. Oh, you were up there for a week. Yeah, just checking out the city.

Well, I hope that when Gail's tour kicks off that she's up there in a private jet and maybe you see her up there with you. Yeah, that'd be nice. But yeah, so we'll keep that coming as news develops. Love Gail. Nice. Great job. Gail, if you're listening to the pod, we would love to have you on,

or if you could call in the Gail Watcher. Facts, facts, Gail Watch. But yeah, that's crazy that she's 17 years old, so she wouldn't even, you know, she can't drink, so she wouldn't know what to, we'd have to be like, I don't know, just talk about your music, Gail. She could have one of those kind of 44-ounce milks at at the amc yeah yeah there you go they should that should be the bruce wayne you know the batman the batman is the is the cherry cordial and the bruce wayne

is 44 ounce milk two percent bruce lame brew swain bruce Swigster. How about that? That's good. Not really going off of... I'm Bruce Swigster. Bruce Swigster. Oh, so you're Batman? No, no, no, no. That may or may not be Bruce Wayne. I'm Bruce Swigster. Mike, we gotta get you a meeting

over at DC Comics. You kicked the door down. Bruce Swigster! How about that? Could you imagine me pulling up to the, landing on the headquarters of DC Comics. You kicked the door down. Bruce Swigster, how about that? Could you imagine me pulling up to the, landing on the headquarters of DC Comics in my chopter? Chopter, copter. Kicking down the door. Listen up, I'm Bruce Swigster.

You are? Well, no, that's what the character will say. I'm hoping to get Robert Pattinson to play him ooh the Patman he's good Patman doodle from Patman to Batman

yeah soon to be Pacman has he ever played yeah but my junior high football team nickname was Pacman so they could make

a movie about that Pacman Pacman get off your ass get off your ass and sack me. Coach, I don't want to sack you. I want to sack the other players. I want you to sack me. I forgot what it feels like to play.

Okay, coach. I saw a little clip the other day of a football college team getting ready for a game, and the players are lined up, and the coach is going down. Each player just hyping it, like pushing them a little bit. And he really got into it with one guy and they started like really shoving each other.

And the players like helmet got knocked off. And I was like, Whoa, this is weird. It's a, I call that toxic, toxic masculinity. I'll tell you what,

tell you what pissed me off. Did you ever, either of you guys play football? No, no. I was, I was, I played for a engineer. play football? No. No, Tim. I played for Ingenuity. Very, very bad. Let's not talk about it.

And saxophone. I played a little tabletop football, maybe. Mike, didn't you play a little pocket pool? Watch yourself, buddy. I could reach through this screen right now and strangle you. Well, I was kind of the heel of a bad football team, but it was fun to hang out with friends, but we were was kind of the heel of a bad football team.

It was fun to hang out with friends, but we were just kind of clowning around. But here's what really pissed me off is in the genre, that type of thing, they're kind of like getting each other revved up and everything. If someone grabs the cage on the front of your helmet, the mask part, it made me so mad because they're now in control of your body the mask part yeah it's it make it made me so mad because like they're like now like in in control of your body of your head yeah yeah and it like pulls you wherever you go and people would come up to me like come on pac-man get revved up and they would pull on my thing and i'd be like i'm going home this sucks fuck you dude also like revved up what do you mean revved up did i never responded well to like the

coach being like mean yeah tv shows it's like he's tough but then when he does praise you it like means so much i was like that just works on dumb fucking jocks i know that worked on me because he was tough on me and then when he praised me he sat me down and was like, Tim, your eyes are blue like the ocean. Wow. Your hair is as auburn as a sunset. I remember I was playing on a hockey team, and I was having a bad couple games and practices, and the coach was yelling at me in front of everyone, in front of the parents and stands and everything. I was like, this sucks.

And he brought me in after a game into his office, and I was like, well, I'm getting the sack here. And he sat me down, and he pushed play on his boombox, and you hear that sort of like little beat come through. And then I just hear, I'm not to praise you like I should. And he and I danced around to Fatboy Slim for, well, we listened to that song probably on repeat three times. Wow.

So like 12 minutes, probably. 12 minutes. Man. Then he sacked me. Sack me, Henny boy. Sack me. You sack me. Kiss my ass.

You sack me, I'll sack you, dude. We got to get out of booze news here. Jesus Christ. Yeah, this is the longest booze news. Still deep in booze news. The fuck? All right. What's the drink of the day?

Who's got it? That's me, my man. Today, we are drinking something called, something I don't like the name of, the monkey gland. The monkey gland. What's wrong with that? Do you, well, if you, I don't like the sound of it, the gland part. Oh, you don't like the word gland? No, gland part. Oh, you don't like the word gland? No, no.

Now, have you guys ever heard? No. No, I thought I had heard it, and then I was like, oh, no, I've only heard because of scrolling the IBA list for this podcast. And we talked about it in episode one. Like, there's some funny names on here, but I've never heard of it. When we first discovered the IBA, this one jumps out. Yeah. Yeah, yeah.

And so I'm excited for it. There's not a lot of other glandular drinks on the list, so this one definitely stands out. Let me read you the very short history here on Differed's Guide because it's concise. I'll go into more detail afterwards. Love Differed. Sure.

The history. Created in the 1920s by Harry Mekelhone. Hey! Mekelhone? How do we pronounce that, Tim? From Harry's New York Bar in Paris. I think you nailed it. The Harry's New York Bar.

We've talked about this all the time. Mekelhone. Yeah. France. The monkey gland takes its name from the work of Dr. Serge Varanoff, who, convinced that testosterone was vital to a long and healthy life, transplanted monkey testicles into elderly Frenchmen. What the fuck? Now, what the hell is going on here?

Wow. just say Voronov, who, yeah, he would take little bits, probably like at a cellular level, and inject them into men's undercarriages in the 20s. And in hopes that it would make them virile again. Did it work? But I like, I, who knows? I didn't get into his lab results. Jesus Christ.

I've been doing it the old-fashioned way and going and filleting all these monkeys. Now they find out they can do an injection. Jesus Christ. I just like the transplanted monkey testicles into elderly Frenchmen. Elderly. Can you imagine that era? What did it do to the Frenchmen? The idea was to make them...

Tim, it pumps them up. Because it was just... I think... I don't know what they thought was going to happen, but like... Virility? Yes, that was the idea, to get the rocket to take off one more mission, let's say. One last mission. One last mission.

I'm seeing thyroid gland as well. That would be great. They should do... You know that movie Space Cowboys? They should do one like that where where guy has one last boner what was the oh i'm space cow i'm thinking of uh wild hogs yeah that's good and old dogs old dogs and wild hogs what wait was that the same cast anyway monkey gland so they're both they're both travolta and I think maybe director.

Wait, he didn't direct those, did he? No, no, same director for both movies. Gotcha, gotcha. So, yes, it was Harry from Harry's in New York invented this, but there's also Frank Meier, M-E-I-E-R, at the Ritz Paris, who also may have invented this at the same time. And we know from past stories that Harry McElhoney maybe takes some credit where it's not correct. You're nailed it, Andrew. I think that you're right.

I think that this, it's because Harry came out, he put up the books. He had like the ABCs of cocktails or whatever. So people tend to attribute cocktails to him. But Ritz Paris is one, just like the B club and the berkeley hotel and stuff like that yeah ritz paris is always in the mix and that was like a hemingway hangout and they made like really good drinks and uh so i'm guessing that they invented it and then harry just put it in his book and then people started saying congratulations hair good position to be in, though. You compile talented people.

Yeah. And interesting stuff. And then you are the talented, interesting one. It's almost as if Paris in the 20s had sort of a scene of like creatives. Kind of a movable feast in the City of Light. I was going to ask, was the feast movable? Unless, does it say in there that the feast was stationary it was static yes it was riveted down to the top of the bar yeah so the feast was not moving at this place uh the so the but the idea of like the monkey gland that's all well and good to have a silly name but the idea here is that

well let me go through the ingredients and I will... I've got a theory. I'm cooking up a theory over here. Okay, hold on. Let me find... I didn't have this up. Let me find monkey. I'm typing with one hand. IBA. What's the other one

doing, Mike? It is holding a highlighter. I find myself on Zooms, I like kind of have something on hand to just pop the cap on and off okay here we go the monkey gland ingredients 45 milliliters dry gin well you know i got that 45 milliliters fresh orange juice nice one tablespoon absinthe one tablespoon grenadine syrup method pour all ingredients into a cocktail shaker shake well with ice strain into a chilled cocktail glass garnish not on your life uh what i like so this is great i love the uh the cocktail glass what is the the monkey gland part of it is so without the without the absinthe this would kind of just be like um a uh gin and juice basically yeah with a little bit of like

grenadine to make give it something but the the absinthe uh put a little testosterone into what would be like yeah a pretty average put some hair on your chest type mentality. Yeah, so that's a little cheeky kind of fun thing to say, oh, the monkey gland thing was happening at the time, these tests and whatever. So I get that. I kind of like that little joke, that little humor. It reminds me of like how like 100 years later

with the penicillin is sort of like, you know, it's got honey and lemon in it. It's healthy. It's my medicine. It's like a penicillin is sort of like, you know, it's got honey and lemon in it. It's healthy. It's my medicine. It's like a penicillin. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Winky name. That's cool. We're having fun. There should be a new one of these. That's got a little bit of, you know, blue chew in there. Yeah.

Some male, some natural male enhancement. Now, Jeff, we know that blue chew is a service and a website that you go to, not an actual product. What? You don't chew on a gummy? There are gummies involved, but Blue Chew is... The service. It's not... I had a phone call with the reps, and that was...

Okay. My bad. Yeah. It's sort of like how, you know, with M&M'sms there's not just one m&m there it's a lentil oh same with skittles oh skittles is the one of lent oh right because skittle skittles came out and said our individual pieces are not called a skittle and people went huh and they said we refer to them as skittles lentils and then the whole world was like well why like we just came out and made a big deal about saying something we all don't like now and yeah never mind we all had

we were all buying your product and talking about it we all love that praise we loved it um we don't we don't necessarily like the tropical flavors but we like the original yeah the original oh my god gland is one of these words in this cocktail name. You know when the euphemism for something is way worse, when it's like someone's like, oh, I'm going to go poopy, and you're like, oh, gross. Don't say that. I feel like if this drink was called the monkey ball, funny, I like it.

A little sassy. Right, right, right. But Gland? But in the 20s, yeah, in the mid to late 20s, I don't think they would have said gland or balls. I like gland. You like gland? I'm going to bat for gland.

I just don't like thinking of testicles as glands. But gland, you got glands all over the place, Tim. That's the beauty of it. It makes it more generic. Yeah, but what about in my scrotum? Well, you got two right there. Two big boys. Now, is this served up, Michael?

Are we doing cubes in the glass or no cubes in the glass? Nope, this is a shake and strain. Hmm, I don't know if I like that. Jeff, you like it when cubes are left behind. Yeah, but only when it's on fresh cubes. Oh, that's true. What is 45 milliliters to an ounce again?

Ounce and a half. One and a half. Yeah, all right. That's what I thought. So this is going to be a nice drink. It's going to have some volume to it. Yeah. It's going to be half.

Okay. Well, folks, we're going to go make these drinks, and when we come back, we'll talk about them. That's great. That's actually perfect. That works out great. That's great. And we're back with MonkeyGlands.

Folks, I hope you enjoyed the ads. Maybe you didn't enjoy the ads. Maybe you want to go over to our Patreon, join the Big Money Hustlers tier, and you can skip the ads. You don't even have to skip them. You don't get them. You know, actually, there's a tier over there that you can get everything. You can get the no ads. You can get all the songs we've ever done.

We get questions for Lennon each month. It's the pay pig. That's a good tier. They get that one. So get on over there and become a pay pig. Well, they might not be interested in that. That's just for the dirtiest little piggies of all. Yeah.

Well, there's only the two options. There's only the two options there's only um uh nope there's only slop head and then we're actually we got a we're doing away with big money hustlers wow michael big choices didn't know yep we're taking that away we're taking it off the table so if you want to hear all that stuff it's pay pig or nothing he's lying folks you don't have to get off on your subscriptions um i'll tell you what happened with this drink guys i feared this much oh shit i go into my kitchen and i'm and i say timmy you got multiple options for the grenadine i know that hanford and jeff probably have that electric red roses grenadine yeah that celebrity bartender jack schramm makes fun of hey But it'll give you a nice pink drink, right? I said,

Tim, at the Ritz Paris in the 20s, they were probably using this kind of like fancy old-timey grenadine you have that's more of a dark purple,

but you run the risk of a brown drink. And I present to you here a disgusting-looking brown drink. Oh, wow. It's gross. It looks like iced coffee.

It looks like coffee. coffee looks hideous we the the thing about this drink like i'm looking at the pictures from the uh iba or just like other articles they do have like a little bit of a um a uh tequila sunrise ish look yeah and and they shouldn't because you shook it or you're supposed supposed to shake it. Yeah, mine just, maybe it's just the lighting. Mine just looks like a ruby red. Ruby red. Ocean spray. Ocean spray.

Tabasco sauce. Tabasco sauce. Hey, speaking of which, look at these little Tabascos I have. I got three of them right here. I'm leaving them over here. Of course you do. You pull those off your shirt? You guys know I don't love a cocktail glass. Too tippy.

Look at me. I already spilled on the way in here. That's a nice looking coupe though, Jeff. I like it. I've brought this up to my face, Jeff. You got to hit the green light on this because I'm going to spill. Absinthe coming through. Mine is right at the forefront.

Yeah. Tastes like a good and plenty.. Tastes like a good and plenty. It tastes exactly like a good and plenty. The absinthe kind of just like... Takes over. Yeah. Dominant. As it's wont to do.

It's funny because there's only a tablespoon of it. There's an ounce and a half of gin. Yeah. Not tasting that. I don't taste the orange juice at all. It's just a base. Just to give you a volume. Yeah.

What kind of OJ do you guys use? Tropicana. I use Wegmans. I went to the Wegmans recently. Ooh. I miss Wegmans. Yeah. I love Wegmans, too.

I miss the deli. I miss the big old subs. I was in the orange juice aisle. I was like, what am I going to pick here? And one of the people in that section came up, the employee came up and was like, hey, is Jeff going to come around at all anytime? I was like, well, I don't think so. He got that honey mustard he loves so much.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Mike, they got Wegmans in Brooklyn? They got a new, yep, they got a Wegmans. And I hear they're putting one up in Manhattan, which seems. Wow, Manhattan. I'll tell you, Wegmans was ahead of the curve because before Whole Foods went national,

Wegmans was the only place where I was like, man, the hot food counter is like restaurant food. This is amazing. You go there for lunch on your lunch break and eat a good meal and then uh i mean i still prefer wegmans but whole foods now has sort of normalized that where you're like you could eat food at hot food at a grocery store and it tastes like a and there's a lot of food yeah whole foods is doing this thing have you ever like they're starting to do it where you just like walk out with your stuff and cameras and sensors link to your phone and you pay. Yeah, the police come pick you up and then you go to jail. Yeah, I was like, I thought I was linked up.

I'm linked up. Link this. Their sausage is linked up, I'll tell you that much. Yeah. Well, I did that. There was an Amazon thing like that the other day. Remember, not the other day. There is one.

But about a month ago, it is in Manhattan. And remember, you know, I bought that great green suit. Oh, baby. Oh, belly green. You look so good in that suit. Thank you. Well, I also got a second suit with it because I wanted to try the sizes and stuff. And the one I didn't want, I'm not going to keep it, so I don't need two green suits.

and stuff. And the one I didn't want, I'm not going to keep it, so I don't need two green suits. So I brought it back to the walk-in Amazon thing and returned it. The guy had checked off, scanned it, I was all set. And I get this fucking email that's like, you never returned it. You've got 30 days to return it or else we're going to charge

you full for the thing. I was like, well, I returned this. I don't understand. It's gone. It's tough to... I don't know how to contact them over at amazon they're fucking nuts just show up go to that warehouse i know i should i just should go back there and say all right look look look at me look at me in the eyes tell me i wasn't here two months ago um i just met a a slop head the other night i was flapping my trap out on the sidewalk in Los Angeles. And a guy came up to me.

He's probably listening right now. Hey, dude. And he said, hey, I'm a big fan of the podcast. I'm from Denver, but I'm in town because I'm going up to Bakersfield to pitch to Amazon. He was like a VR guy pitching a VR product to Amazon. And he said their offices were up in Bakersfield. I said, Bakersfield? He said, yeah, because that's where the huge

headquarters of the shipping center. It makes sense just outside of a giant city in a quiet little place to have your big, giant Amazon facility. Your Amazonian size. Hey, we got to do VR for the blowout. You guys have never done like the new

vr stuff huh no i i hear it's cool though or you you've told me about it it's great yeah well this guy's vr thing i want to say this guy's name was mike from denver he it wasn't vr like this is the whole new world happening dudes we should invest This is not about fun. He was working for this company that does forklift operator certification virtually so that you could learn how to drive a forklift and actually get certified. And you didn't have to actually do it. It's a dangerous thing as you're learning it. And I even thought he was kind of like it was a comedy thing because forklift certification is sort of heavily memed yeah yeah but then he took out oh he showed me the website i was like no this is like real forklifts

this is like real shit and you can learn on an oculus huh um yeah it's like i wonder go ahead i wonder if uh now i lost my trade go ahead jeff and i'll bring it back around like it's funny all these simulators like even when i was a kid i had a flight simulator on my pc and it was so true to life that it was like inoperable by a child yeah you know what i mean it wasn't it wasn't like a video game where it's just like oh this is the gas and here's your here's your yoke yeah here's your stick it was like well you got to talk to the tower first. You didn't talk to the tower. And it's like, I don't want to talk to the tower. And you know, like there's a trucker simulator now that's like really faithful.

And with all these VR things, I bet you they can really, really put you in an actual thing, an actual device or an actual vehicle that operates exactly the way that they really do. And you can get certified. That's wild. I had a neighbor neighbor i would go to his house he he like had uh super nintendo and i would go over there and he'd be like i think i'm just gonna play the flight simulator and he would like you know i'd watch him like put the flaps up and talk yeah talk to the tower i was like all right i'm gonna play battle toads the his fucking game in history i remember hanging out over at a friend's house and his dad was on the computer all night i was like man you're

boy your dad sure works a lot and i look at the monitor and he was doing a flight simulator he was a dork sorry dude dad your dad's a dork that reminds me of you know that line in the simpsons when uh millhouse has like a remote control plane and Bart's like, come on, make it do some loops, make it crash. He's like, the goal of every RC Flyer is to have a perfect level of flight. Milhouse is such a dweeb. He's a dweeb. He's got the flood pants. What I was going to say about the VR stuff is aren't a lot of video games

tested with the army first? That's how people learn about combat or something and then that technology gets siphoned down into games. Is that crazy? I don't know, man. I think Call of Duty is how people learn how to be soldiers.

That's how they desensitize people to pull the trigger on their fellow man. You can never desensitize me. I'm a very sensitive guy. Yeah, you can't decentralize people. I don't want to kill anyone. He'll be out there singing songs about beers to his enemies. Oh, boy, I had a nice crisp MGD the other day. I was out at Casa Bianca Pizza.

I was out in the woods. Yeah. I was scrounging around the ditches out there in the meadow. No, I was at Casa Bianca Pizza Pie in Eagle Rock. I'm eating pizza, and I say, look at this. MGD on the menu i order it comes out in one of those new bottles remember we saw they changed the bottle yeah it's red and black red and black and it's great you know that's a good pizza beer a nice crisp light

beer like that cold bottle but then in a clear bottle i put up to my lips i swear to god it's ever so slightly more of a wide mouth bottle than typical bottles not enough you could tell by the gauge you're like this is a big one but it wasn't big enough to like that you would note it it wasn't like a mickey's bottle but you know like a big slam remember big slam yeah but it was not no big slam jay this was this was more like how mcdon McDonald's straws are just slightly wider. Yeah, yeah. You don't notice it, but you suck down. Not quite a boba straw.

Not quite a boba straw. Not quite a boba fit. No, no, no. But for the MGD, I love drinking beer with pizza, but I also don't want it to foam up and make me full because I'm going to have eight slices of pizza. So that wide top helped me sip and not foam less glug more chug well you say it's like a pizza this is the place

that does um they make their pizzas on ritz crackers right i wish yeah this thing tastes like black licorice and i've been coming around on i traditionally don't really love black licorice as a flavor but i've been drinking more amaro and i've been loosening up on that stance and i'm like there's interesting within the world of the 10 amaro bottles i have i'm saying this one's a little like this oh and this one's a little like this but this absence it really just is good and plenty you know yeah yeah yeah especially especially when you put it together. Because, look, I'll confess, as I was making this, I used the same tablespoon for my absinthe as I did for my grenadine,

and I licked it. That was exactly good and plenty, because it's the cherry sugar and the absinthe together. Oh, it's kind of like an egg in there. Yeah, it's exactly capsule-shaped candy. I don't, for the amount of gin that's in here, I don't taste it at all. Yeah, but you feel it, don't you? Because you get a little warm in the face.

Yeah. We haven't done this in a while, but who do you, who do you, Oh, I cut you off. I'm going to continue to cut you off. Let's be honest. I deserve to be cut off. The, the,

um, who, we haven't done this in a while. Who, who would drink this? Like, who do you picture drinking this drink? I guess I'm picturing just the kind of windbag guy who wants to talk about his drink all night yeah like it's a monkey gland

yeah like a podcast host or a uh similarly annoying fellow yeah you know those windbags you know the type it's actually named after a monkey's nuts man i mean isn't it really hard we look we've got cocktail aficionados listening to this podcast and they get our vibe and they tend to drop their shoulders and let their hair down and get that. We want it's cool if you know a lot about liquor, but be welcoming. Don't be don't be holding the rest of the world away with your knowledge. Welcome people in. holding the rest of the world away with your knowledge welcome people in and i think that during the course of this podcast we started off by being like we're three bozos who like mgd and we're going to learn about cocktails now being more than a year in i do find myself

when i'm talking to people especially at a bar i i do so i have to i have to check like when i'm talking about a drink here it do I, I know I'm not, I'm not, I don't know enough to actually be pretentious about it, but like, am I going to start sounding like one of these windbag fuckers? Right. Because I only remember an interesting factoid about like every other drink. A lot of the drinks are unremarkable. And if you were like, yeah, you know, a sidecar, ay Nail, I'm like, oh, yeah, what was that one again?

Those to me are two notable drinks, but I continue. Oh, yeah, but I mean, they can't all be like Trinidad Sours and stuff. You know what I mean? Rusty Nail was a Stone Cold classic. Yeah, yeah. But okay, Rusty Nail was what? Ginger Ale and Cognac? I get you.

I can't remember. Or was that a horse's neck? That was horse's neck. Rusty Nail was Dramboo. Dramboo, okay. And Scotch. Dramboo. Okay, but look, I'm going to say that Monkey Gland,

in three months, if you're like, Dutz, how about a Monkey Gland? If you see me at a bar, hey, Dutz. I'm going to be like, what was that one again? This one is already feeling a little bit unremarkable. Well, I'm with you because there's a fundamental thing with this one, which feeling a little bit like unremarkable well i i i'm with you because there's a fundamental thing with this one which is like you're mixing up a cocktail you

want the alchemy of multi things becoming greater than the sum of the parts that's a whole like a balance like exactly kind of like the three hosts of this podcast not not so great on their own put them together it's almost like there's the fourth host, you know? Well, I don't know. Questions for Lennon is soaring right now. That's true, but they have good guests. Good guests. That's more of a guest show. Plus the blowout is hosted by,

the host of the blowout's pretty good. Yeah, and also the pay pig has no show, and that's the best tier of all, so. No, but those other ones, Jeff, the Rusty Nail, I thought it was brilliant because drambuie on its own is a little too sweet and you cut it with some scotch and it's a great drink and then you mentioned the sidecar also delicious cognac triple sec and lemon the triple sec is a

little orangey the cognac is a little yeah okay look tim i picked bad ones i i'm not you know there's forgettable drinks i'm gonna dance on your grave over this um. You know there's forgettable drinks. I'm going to dance on your grave over this. I know there's worse drinks, and I'm saying that this one, I'm drinking a sludge that only tastes like one of the ingredients. So whoever this was, be it Harry or Ritz, you're done fucked up. Yeah. I think it's with the absinthe I think this has happened

with us before it's basically just an absinthe drink. It is. But we're learning You know what I mean? When we did the Sazerac we had to do an absinthe rinse

on the inside of our glass and then discard the absinthe and we were like what a waste. Why are we doing this? And now we got it and we're complaining. But now we know

because it would have just tasted like good and plenty plenty i bet this would be a lot better with just a rinse that's the right way to go though not the rinse but the spritz the yeah maybe a little bit up that's what you want a little bit a nice little question mark fart. I'm looking through our old recipes and trying to think of what are some weirdies. What are some weirdies? All the ones that I can't remember are cognac ones. Sazerac.

There's drinks you don't remember? We haven't done that many pods. I remember every damn drink. Tuxedo. There's a bunch of these that I'm like, what was that again? I can't remember what's remember every tuxedo i'm you know like there's a bunch of these that i'm like what was that again i can't remember what's in a tuxedo the tuxedo was like a martini variation yeah gin and uh oh yeah vermouth and made in tuxedo new york or something that's right yeah yellow bird we love all right but enough of uh enough that. Do we do a second round? Do we need a second round?

I have more left over in my shaker that didn't fit my glass, so I might go grab that. Shaker. Shaker's Diner in Pasadena. We used to laugh at the sign and say, Shaker's.

Folks, we'll be right back and we'll talk about our final thoughts. Great. And we're back! Talking about our final thoughts on the monkey gland. Hey, this monkey gland, it's not an order again

you're not going to order it it's not going to happen is yeah it's just not going to be ordered again you don't do don't order it again don't order it in the first place don't order in the first place unless you you have run your favorite food is good and plenty, and you've run out. Well, I got some good and plenty, so I'll go to a bar. Next best thing. This, I was, I thought of this term this afternoon when I was buying my gin. I was very excited to use this, but unfortunately I cannot. This drink is not a, this is not a GGD.

This is not a good gin drink. Unfortunately's not it's too bad because i really wanted to use that grateful dead i want to be happy to use that but it's not just not it's the and and it's it's in our front to the gin masked we love that junipery gin here on the sloppy boys show yeah it's it's all just covered up but it kind of makes me happy that i like disliking a drink i feel like uh that's kind of a fun one to just have a week and be like hey folks it's a clunker even tim i i like you guys are uh you don't have a the you go back and forth a little bit more uh mike we all know the things that you hate uh me i think i kind of tend to like the drink every week this one i'm telling you i'm not gonna say bad drink but i'm saying yeah i'm saying it's not an order again if you gave me free monkey glands all night i'd be like okay great fine yeah

exactly yes and then it's also just like why would you do that though because any other drink is better this drink before we put the absinthe in it, was probably a nice little gin grenadine thing. Yeah, it had a gin tequila sunrise. Exactly. Huh. Michael, your thoughts and feelings? No, I will echo Tim. This is a, it's an NGGD, not a good gin drink.

And it is not something I will order again. Sorry. Yeah. What are you guys thinking, though, in the grand scheme of things that taste like black licorice? Like I was saying, I've been kind of warming to certain Amaro and things like that. Do you do the good and plenty flavor? Is that a big thumbs down to you? Do you like Good & Plenty?

No. I do like Good & Plenty, but when it's like Halloween and it's in a bowl of candy, it's the fun side. I go, Good & Plenty. I try a few and go, I'm not going to have these anymore. Good for three capsules. Three caplets. And I'll just swallow those like a pill i don't even chew you know do you how about this twizzlers do you guys do twizzlers no no the red ones yeah

even the reds i don't like i prefer red vines yeah i'll tell you i don't do i don't do a twizzler i don't do a red vine You don't? It's waxy Red vines are waxy I'll give you that You're drinking your coke out of a glass Let's say you got like a Batman Or a Calvary Cordial

Sure, sure Use a red vine as your straw It's kind of fun You gotta bite the ends off You gotta bite the ends off You can spit them out if you need to, Jeff But you do have to bite through it Have you guys

There's a pasta that's shaped like a straw. Bucatini? Bucatini. Strattini. During COVID, there was a Bucatini shortage. It was so popular. Is it long like a straw or a short little straw? Long.

A short one would be more like a penne, right? Or a ziti. But then the long, thin, it kind of just looks like a spaghetti. It's thin. Yeah, but there's a negative space running through its body. Kind of like us after these monkey glands that left us cold. Well, hey, my final thoughts on this are the same as yours. It's fine.

It's a C. It's a C. I mean, I am enjoying the taste. Like now I feel the slightest buzz coming on and I sip the drink and I'm like, oh, it's kind of fancy. Oh, it'll do the job. Yeah. What I'm going to do is now that I got the gin out, I'm going to, the gin's in the freezer. I'm going to make myself a martini for the blowout, which, you know, this week we talked about Kanye Genius, the documentary.

So go back and listen. That's why I'll be acting the way I'm acting on that. We're mixing our tenses. I'm going to make something because we are going to have talked about. Mike, you're brilliant. Martini. Why waste the gin in this when you could just have yourself maybe the best cocktail, you know? Or like, look, I bet you this would be good

if you did exactly what you do but instead of the tablespoon of absinthe you give it a little rinse yeah and then after a few of these you go uh you know back to your bedroom and you yeah and then and then in the morning you know you gotta this is a good podcast people are learning from us like oh so i should wake up in the morning and go to the bathroom yeah that's the routine ah drink at night and then eliminate my bowels and then And then... It's that simple, folks. When you hear that rooster crow, it's time to push logs. The rooster crows, your underpants you will throw off your knees. Got a nice ring to it.

Off your knees. So memorable. I guess past the knees would be best. These monkey glands aren't so bad. Honey, I gotta go throw my underpants past my knees. Don't ask. Throats. Sounds like such a panic type velocity.

I gotta yeet my fucking jeans. The monkey gland, if you're going to compliment it, it's nice and strong because at an ounce and a half of gin and then that tablespoon, the absinthe is high proof. So that's a tipsy little cocktail. I like that. Yeah. That's not bad. And then also, hey, to fill fill your glass did you make just one because i feel like just for the picture and for my own enjoyment i made a one and a half not quite

a double ah what did you guys do did you just make one and it filled a glass i i did the iba recipe and my my cocktail glass is only like like one of these like two and a half ounces or whatever not no four and a half ounces so i couldn I couldn't fit it all in there. So it was two rounds. Yeah, mine made it just right up, exactly up to where it needed to be. Like a Greek pour. Isn't it?

Yeah. The Greek pours are a hit online. Everyone keeps sharing us. When you have a glass of wine poured up to the rim, we like seeing it. Yeah, the Greek pour is funny. That's our show. Follow us on social media, at The Sloppy Boys,

where we release these recipes ahead of time. And, hey, need more boys? Follow us on Patreon, and you can get The Sloppy Boys Blowout, our weekly bonus episode. It kind of rocks. Goodbye. Goodbye. Goodbye. Folks, we love seeing you every week.

Yes. Seeing your shining faces. Yep. How do we normally sign off on this thing? You say goodbye. Goodbye, folks. That's it. Goodbye.

Goodbye. Didn't you say your spiel? That's the show? Yeah, you know I gotta read it most of the time Because the monkey glands start hitting Well you know it's always a good opportunity Jeff You're closing out the Sloppy Voice Podcast to point out that To the people out there who think that

Tim can't write a good organ counter melody Right Keep your ears peeled because you're about to have your whole world turned upside down by Give It Up For Your Boy. Goodbye, folks. Give it up for your boys Give it up for your boys