The Sloppy Boys - 78. Cider

Episode Date: April 15, 2022

The guys head to a cider bar for a tour through the world of appley alcohol. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hey folks, welcome to the Sloppy Boys where we take a deep dive into the drinks that you love. I'm Jeff Dutton along with Mike Hanford. Well, I'm talking on a normal mic, but I am no more than a normal mic. And Tim Galpakis? What is up? He's no normal mic. I'm no normal mic. You're talking on a normal mike and dave galvac is what he is up he's no normal mike i'm no normal mike you're talking on a normal mic i'm talking on a normal mic but i am no more than a normal mic you're no more than so isn't that what we were saying before yeah but you said you're no more than a normal mic

so you are on a normal mic but you're i i think your tagline should be i'm talking on a normal mic but i'm no normal mic that's what it was why am I throwing the more in there because you don't you want to be a normal mic that brings you right back oh okay well whoop

yes that's right folks we're back in real life again all three together again and I just had a delicious barbecue chicken sandwich made by Chef Jeff Chef

Chef Boyardee Cheferson ooh ooh that is good Instagram at Cheferson at Chef Jeff Boyardee. Shefferson. Ooh, that is good. Instagram, at Shefferson. At Shefferson. Shefferson Dutton. Shefferson and his Duddy Delightfuls. How about Shefferson Mutton?

Oh. I make the meat you love to eat. Ooh, this is all very good. I'll open a restaurant called Shea Shefferson. Shea Shefferson. Shea Shefferson Dutton. Shea Shefferson Dutton. Oh, Shea Shefferson. Shea Shefferson. Shea Shefferson Shutton. Shea Shefferson Shutton. Oh, Shea Shefferson Shutton.

Yeah, that was, it smelled good. I'm still not eating the meat. Right. I don't know if we had ourselves some Impossible Burgers earlier today. We sure did. It was one of those slouches either. You made those up pretty good. Thanks.

Were they still pink in the middle when you ate them? They were, which I think, I bet like Impossible Burger worked hard to like figure out how to make that. Well, they put in the middle when you ate them? They were, which I think I bet Impossible Burger worked hard to figure out how to make that. Well, they put in blood. Yeah. Oh. From animals. From humans. Well, but Jeff does this thing. That's what these animal rights people are like. They'd really kill a human.

They'd rather kill an Impossible Burger. Oh! Jeff made this thing. What did you fry? You fried them. Yeah, you fry one side. But then you put them in like a mustard fry?

I put mustard on the top of the patty, right? With a little soy sauce. Yeah. And then when you flip it, that thing just goes right on the grill. They call that mustard fried And you can do that at In-N-Out Mustard fried, wow You know what I have not attempted at home

Is the smash Have you smashed at home? No Wait a minute No, I have not Yes, no, I have not No, never smash, I shouldn't do it Is a smash burger when you fuck the burger and then make it? fuck and then the burgers what covered in jizz ah i imagine nasty stuff i

imagine the the first time smasher makes too big of a pancake you gotta start with way less than you think because once you smash it way down yeah the the it gets wide real wide what's the different what's the smash it's just kind of like there's no you don't shape it really it's i think you take like a ball and you just press it into the grill until it's like um thin thin yeah it's sitting there for one second it looks like a meatball but then they it's like it looks like an iron but it's like oh god oh see that's why this is confusing now with the smash burger this is kind of a raunchy episode huh jesus christ yeah yeah a couple weeks ago we had

this on this is your show you host this part we had a whole bathroom humor episode kind of recently now this one is just the fuck episode yeah all right enough of that fuck talk yeah no ft on the P. We're here to talk about Apple Booze. Yep. That's right. Apple Bees. What's Apple Bees?

A neighborhood restaurant? Is that what that is? Neighborhood Grill and Bar and Grill. I like that Bar and Grill sound. That sounds like a cool place to be. Eating good in the neighborhood. Yeah. You like the Bar and Grill?

Yeah. Yeah, you know what always sounds so appealing to me is, Friday night they're dressed to kill down at Dino's bar and grill the boys are back in town I was like I love the idea of like getting dressed

to kill and going out to a bar and grill you know like I'm gonna meet some ladies eat a couple ribs a bar and grill jalapeno poppers

I don't even really know what I picture exactly with a bar and grill sure you do but I know but I feel like there a bar and grill. Sure you do. But I know, but I feel like there's so many different types. Applebee's. Yeah.

I think that that is a... How wildly different are they? That's a family restaurant that came out of the fern bar tradition, kind of. I'm sure. I would say bar and grill is more bar, you know? It's a bar with a grill. You could get a burger at the bar. I tell people about the fern bar all the time. Yeah.

Whenever I'm at a fern bar. I tell people about the Fern Bar all the time. Yeah. Whenever I'm at a Fern Bar, I tell them about it. I say, I know this is one. You know where the first one was? TGI Fridays. Did you know that it's in cocktail? It is. It is. Do you want anything to eat, sir?

No. No. Any drink? I already have my drink. I brought my own drink from home. I'm on a podcast where we talk about drink making. TGI Fridays was like the first one, right? Right just we learned that on the pod we've settled that and then coming out of that you got applebee's you got the 99 restaurant and pub yeah on the east coast

what else yeah i mean even even like outback feels like it comes from i'll give you the 99 feels more bar and grill to me i'm thinking like like, yeah, that if it's like, yeah, a burger and a beer place, I guess that's a bar and grill. A bar and grill to me sounds like a place where the waitress, female waitress is a little older and she calls you honey. But that could be a diner. Yes, but they're not serving booze at the diner. Who is David Letterman's ex-girlfriend who was the original head writer of late night with

david letterman meryl marco right did she die recently oh i don't know r.i.p big fan i'm looking that up uh while you look that up i'll share my little recommendation which is she directed this very funny video that's on youtube where she interviewed a long time ago interviewed the waitresses at canters and they're all kind of very the grumpy ones they're grumpy are you think i'm allowed to say the word brassy it feels like a word that has a connotation i wouldn't understand a brass a brassy broad well i feel like the broad part of brassy broad is probably the more is the worst part i feel like jessica says brassy broad. Well, I feel like the broad part of brassy broad is probably the more. Is the worst part. The part of that part. I feel like Jessica says brassy broad.

Yeah, when she says it, I think she means it like a burlesque dancer. You know, that kind of brassy. Hmm. Hmm. Or just actual brass, like at a fern bar. Brass rails. Hey. Sometimes I'll do big rails of cocaine.

Oh, yeah. And Tim, how's that working out for you? Not bad. It makes me all coked up Alright Let me see here Meryl Marko Is As of

This podcast recording Alive and well She's 73 years old Okay let's try to get this episode Out the door real fast Meryl we love your writing She writes books now She's great

I like the idea of a bar and grill That's on the water On a lake but still sell seafood shrimp and stuff but there's not shrimp coming out of that lake i think about that all the time where my parents are from uh there there's a place called lansy's on the lake and it is exactly what you're picturing and it's so funny that i went there and i i ordered like popcorn shrimp or something. I'm like, what the fuck am I doing? There's no fucking shrimp over there. There's no shrimp here. I'm on Lake Sacandaga. Sacandaga.

Sacandaga. Whatever. There's a lot. That lake, because now I'm thinking of Lake George. They've got 10 places in a row where you get like wings and a Bud Light, you know? Yeah, that's good. That's real good. Ooh, wings.

Or a cider. Yes! Put the cider, be cider. Mm-hmm. Hey, let's get into some Bip Bip Bip. Nice. I hope it's cider related this time. Whoop!

Hmm. I was into you, but I'm over it now. Hmm. Who the fuck is you, you know? Hey! Deke! It's booze news, you brunch bitch! Ha ha! You need to leave! Ghost of Crack Teen Elsa sent to us by Zach Mack aka the ghost of Craig T

Nelson on Instagram and if you have a booze news theme email it to the sloppy boys podcast at gmail.com we love that guy yeah I like that he has a little producer tag yeah that's a smart idea Will made it he's he uh he always comes out like we're talking about movies or something he will put our faces on the movie posters of people we post those follow us on instagram folks there's

funny visuals he does they're all great but sometimes he puts our faces on things that our faces should not be on and it freaks me out hunts me you me. You've haunted me, ghost of Craig T. Wilson. Well, he's really good at looking through pictures of us until he finds the exact right angle. A lot of bad Photoshop, the heads are turned the wrong way or whatever,

but he'll put us on someone's body and then the Adam's apple kind of lines right up. And then other times he'll chop out just our facial features and then nest them in the head of someone else. So it really does make me do a double take

where I'm like, who is that? Oh, that's me. Just a little teeny little doinker of booze news here. You know, I'm always interested in who's... I'm first? Oh, God, I'm not getting into this routine again. I am a student of comedy. I'm steeped in its tradition.

Um, no, I love seeing when a booze brand gets, uh, the, there's a, uh, a celebrity endorsement,

their sponsorship deal. And it says a lot about what the brand thinks their images and who they're, who they're going for, you know, like not too long ago, I saw, um, you know, Z- long ago i saw um you know z-way yeah she had a party and it was sponsored by johnny walker and it was like the johnny walker z-way party i was

like okay i see a new york the the cool fashiony uh comedians of new york and johnny walker is saying hey we won it um but this was one that caught my eye because uh jagermeister comes up a lot on the show but we have not ever had jaeger on the show have we no uh no i don't enjoy it it hasn't been a mix you don't like it fran said it was just like college only i feel like um i like it when it's really cold yeah i'll do it uh on a dare i feel like had it but i don't think i've really like uh taken in when i've had it but i don't think i've really like uh taken in when i've had it like it hasn't been very it's i mean it's a straightforward black licorice taste and we kind of recommend it as an alt for a lot of the absinthe and stuff like that

um the uh that notion of what a brand associates themselves with there was a brand that we were trying to hit up. What was it? Jenny's Gooder? No, it was a boozy one. And I remember we reached out and they either didn't respond or they said no. And then a couple months later, their spokesman was Priyanka Chopra. Who's that?

Just like Nick Jonas's wife. she's like this beautiful actress yeah and like super smart and important and like but like they were like a dumb boozy brand and of course you you contrast that with like with like a classy uh a status that's exactly person i think that it's yeah it says it's not really like this is what we think of ourselves they're like this is what we were told we have a gap in this market. And we're going for that. Because I remember Heineken had Jay-Z as their guy for a long time. And that was really cool of Heineken.

And you're like, oh, because Heineken had been made fun of by Budweiser for being like, for every guy's being like, I'm drinking an import. And I drive a Saab and it was uncool. Right. So then they were like, let's get the opposite of a guy who's like a dork boring you

about his beer. I like to think of Jay-Z, you know, like when we have sponsors, sometimes they send us the product. Jay-Z at his house having like a bunch of Heinekens in the fridge. Wait, wasn't there a scandal with Kristall? Like, I think Kristall at one point came out and we were like, hey, look, we don't like all these rappers drinking our stuff. And they were like, okay, see ya.

Yeah, fuck off. And then like suddenly there was like a lot of Dom in songs. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I think it was from Kristall to dom that's cool i always wonder about hennessy pops up in a lot of music and then but then there's that one song past the kovacic and i always wondered if the f kovacic had reached out to them and who's passing is that luda kovacic i do think it's luda well oh well i was gonna bring up to you, Jägermeister. I just was watching TV and I saw this commercial and it caught my eye

because it had a funny slogan I want to share. But Jägermeister's new spokesman, this works perfect, Posty, Post Malone. Hey, that's the guy. I can never remember his name, but I love his music. We talked about him on our Patreon. And he's a funny guy. He's an enthusiast of kind of like lower shelf. He was the Bud Light guy for a long time.

And then he was. Is he not that anymore? He might still be, but. I like to think he is. He did a whole Bud Light branded concert tour. And I remember seeing a clip where he was like, yes, this is. They're paying me, but I love Bud Light and I would drink it anyway. Mm-hmm.

Oh, by the way, pass the Kvasie Busta Rhymes. Busta. Don't add us, everyone. Yeah, geez. Well, so the vibe of this commercial is like, Post Malone brings a bunch of people into a bar. They're celebrating and he's pouring, like, freezing cold shots of Jager

and they hold it up like they're going to toast. pouring like freezing cold shots of Jaeger and they hold it up that like, they're going to toast. And then they, the slogan was funny. It goes Meister every moment. And like, I think they meant like Meister, like he was the party Meister leading the party.

But I read, I read Meister every moment. I was like, drink Jaeger Meister. You got a free moment. I was like, drink Jägermeister every moment. I mean, you got a free moment? That's a Jägermeister. There was a Post Malone Bud Light commercial recently where he's like kind of the same thing.

He comes to a bar and everyone's like joining him and he's cheersing and the kind of tagline, I forget exactly what it was, but the idea was like, we've been away at our homes for two years, so we're all coming back and let's make up for some lost time. Yeah.

Drink that Bud Light. Wait, that's funny. So this one did have a line that it was like, we've worked hard to get these moments back. Here's to keeping them forever. Oh, interesting. So maybe. Maybe I was. I thought mine was a Bud Light or the one I'm talking about.

It's possible he's going to all these meetings being like. I bet you every agency is just like, OK, the American consumer is back out in the world how do we appeal to that and the tangible it's such a funny thing to make it a cause like yes everyone was cooped up in their homes for two years and yes it's fun to be back at bars but the idea of like let's not take it for granted i don't think anyone is i think people are not taking for granted but the idea the idea that it's like, so keep buying. Like, keep buying Bud Lighter Jägermeister because we don't want to start another pandemic. And it's like, I guess it's the easiest way to start. I've taken it for granted. I forgot all about the pandemic.

I've seen you. You go out to bars. You don't order any alcohol. You just stand around. It's nice to be out. You don't talk to anybody. Seeing all you fresh-faced people. Well, from now on, I want you to meister every moment. And personally, I'm going to be out you don't talk to anybody you know you fresh-faced people well from now on i want you to meister every moment and personally i'm going to be looking

at my gcal and if i see a free moment in there and mark it down to meister i got no uh gail watch 2022 today we got more problems in the uh copter chopter it's the fucking audio shit up there is not working the audio shit the audio recording shit up there is not working i do not know what's going on nobody seems to fucking know what's going crucial to a podcast a cast does not have the budget to get a proper tech person in the chopper copter we can't you got the engine going engine the rotors are all fine thing we're up in the air we're still up tax machine still working stuff's coming in we got a we got a soda machine up in that thing now it's fucking great yeah we're gonna make some suicides on there what do you think we're doing up there

that's why we go up so much um well we wish you the best with that getting i'll keep you posted on how that's gonna alternate that gear going, speaking of ACAST, our podcast hosting platform that we're on, me and Jeff went to one of their events recently down at LA Live. Met the gang. Ate some sliders. Tipped a few. Had some tequila shots. I loved it.

Oh, yeah. We're kind of out there. Open bar, baby. Mike, you missed it. You know what pissed me off? I missed it because I was at the fucking Austin airport. Delayed plane. I would have been there.

Yeah, but I'm sure you were munching a slider and dipping in the fries. Yeah, I was dipping everything. No more layovers between New York and LA, Michael. I want you straight shot, okay? Hey, that's what I said. I got on the plane and said, look, people want me there now. Now, now, now. He said, all right, I'll take a vote.

And I lost by just a fucking two people. Damn. How long did you get any? Do they have like Franklin barbecue at that airport or anything? They did have some barbecue places. I didn't, you know, I wasn't eating meat, so I didn't eat it. But they all smelled delicious. But I don't know if I'm missing out on barbecue at the airport.

You know what I mean? Yeah. It's okay if I miss that one. You don't think they have the finest pit master? I don't know. And with that, wrap it up. Oh! Okay, okay, okay. We've already mentioned what we're doing

tonight. Cider. You've had? I've had. Mm-hmm. I have the same feeling. I've had. Yeah. We're not jumping up and down here, are we?

No, no. Stationary. It's, yeah, well, we'll get into our thoughts a bit later. But cider, okay, made from? Okay. Let's bring it, let's rally it back here. Cider is made from apples. You Let's rally it back here. Cider is made from apples. You know what I'm talking about.

One a day keeps the dentist doctor away. The doctor at bay. This is... I was reading on the Wikipedia. I'm looking at the Wikipedia right now. Ciders can range... I didn't know about this. The alcohol content can range from 1.2% to 8.5 ABV,

or for more traditional English ciders, 3.5 to 12. Oh! 12%. Big window. Oh, in UK law, it must contain at least 35% apple juice. Hmm. Sounds like a very fine. Yeah.

Motz comes to mind. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Apple cider. Apples just feel very wholesome to me. You should. A good student would give an apple to a beloved professor. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Or a professor that's trying to grease the wheels with slumping green.

The thing I learned about the cider, which I thought was cool, Julius Caesar back in 55 BCE, before Christ era, he was in... Before Christ, Eric. If you're saying it to a guy named Eric. Julius Caesar and his Romans went to go to conquer some people up in Britain. And the Celts, they saw him drinking this cider. Celts. Right? Irish?

I'm saying Celts as I'm saying Celtics, but you're probably right. Celts. C-E-L-T-S. Fermented crab apple drink. So they brought it, the Romans brought it from there all the way back to Europe. And now like every country in the world has cider. There's like, everyone's got their version of it. And that's what's distinct about it is like, it's not brewed.

It's not distilled. It's fermented. It's fermented. It's like fermented the way grapes are fermented for wine. Yep. And there's, you can use, there's modern ciders and there's heritage ciders. Modern ciders are like made from apples, like your galas, your Granny Smiths, your blah, blah, blah. The ones you'd find at-

Fuji. Consumer. Something you would eat. Macintosh. Macintosh, my favorite apple. Okay, that's more the HBO. Okay, that's it. Okay, that's it.

Okay, so we got that figured out. The heritage apple is more of your crab apple. Okay, so we got that figured out. The heritage apple is more of your crab apple. Oh. Oh. That's like what the old style, like the traditional in England, UK, they're getting old road apples off the ground. Hard little walnut apples.

Yeah. Can't even, even a squirrel would pass on it. Actually, you know what a road apple is? Road apple? Yeah. It's, I think it's like dung from a mule or something. Oh, a road apple is road apple yeah it's uh i think it's uh like dung from a a mule or something oh a road apple yeah that's funny yeah dung from a mule or a horse oh okay third i'll turn them around so yeah ciders i mean take a look at the wikipedia there's a whole bunch of shit you can

read uh there's i mean it's there's it's so much of it it's so much of a, it's too much. But we're having a fun, exciting cider experience today. We are. You listening, you hear us all together, and you figure the whole episode will probably just be them sitting there talking. Cracking some ciders, boring snoring. Not so, friends. We're going out into the world, and we're going to have a white glove tour through the

world of ciders. Yeah. And where's this place, Tim? friends we're going out into the world and we're going to have a white glove tour through the world of ciders yeah and where's this place tim in right here in la in virgil village alma's cider and beer they reached out to us and we love that hey if you own a bar folks you know uh dm us we'll come to you but um the owner of this place said hey hey, if you're interested in cider, come on by. And yeah, it's a bit of a blind spot for us. So we said, we'll come on by. So today, instead of, we're not making any drinks. We didn't buy any drinks. We're going to go there and we're going to learn about cider.

I want to know, like, what's the down the middle, you know? Like, what's like the lager of ciders and then what gets fancy? Because my thing, well, Jeff, you see, you don't like it. What's your down the middle? You know, like what's like the lager of ciders and then what gets fancy? Because my thing, well, Jeff, you said you don't like it. What's your deal with it? I just never default to it. Have you ever bought one? Yeah, I have. And I like them.

I prefer them drier. Is there like the Golden State one in the tall can? Yeah. Yeah. Sweet and dry is also a distinction. Yeah. It's like a champagne. Yeah, like a wine or something. Which is my problems with it. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh is also a distinction. Yeah, it's like a champagne. Yeah, like a wine or something.

Which is my problems with it. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, I see that. But I go drier and they're fine. Mitch, I think, defaults to cider these days. Yeah. Yes.

That's like this. And I would say if I were to conjure. It's a health thing too, right? What's that? It's like less wheat, no wheat. It's popular with people with a lot of different dietary restrictions because yeah it's gluten-free there's no wheat there's no yeast and i think the wheat thing makes it more like it's more like paleo and keto friendly i don't think it actually

qualifies as either of those but it's closer than having beer so a lot of people with i i feel like when somebody at a table orders cider i'm always like they've got some sort of thing wrong with them uh but then they're like no i don't i don't think that you're supposed to hear that mitch isn't doing it for that reason because even even uh when he when he's having like a you know non-healthy meal or whatever he has i think there's a certain i i think there's kind of some kind of cider bros who are kind of beer adjacent guys and are like, hey, cider. You know, maybe Mitch had a lot of cider in New England or something. Well, if it is an English thing or an Irish thing.

Kind of tavern-y. Yeah. Which is funny because I always think of English and Irish as just beer drinking or stouts and Guinness. No, they love cider. Yeah. stouts and goodness they love cider yeah well that's that's where i first had the dry stuff because my i feel like with cider i i thought of it as like autumnal and like i like them i warm spicy yeah seasonal but like i i saved it for that it's like yes maybe in october i would order two ciders but i think of them as a sweet treat in the fall then i did a uk trip and i had some ciders that were like really dry really light not sweet at all and i loved them and some of them were pear

and most of them were apple but it would just be like a tall boy can and just like a very very crisp crisp crisp light taste and i said now this i could get behind. Me likey. Do you remember the ABV? I think it was like four. Yeah, a lot of them are pretty comparable to beer. I'm going into this with an open mind. I am too because I like being in something like this where you're getting like, oh you might taste

this type of, a hint of this. Okay, sure I do. Mike, they're going to pamper your ass. Yeah. I'm curious, Alma's Cider and Beer, we don't know whether they're making it in-house, whether they just have a selection of stuff or whatever, but we're going to taste a few ciders and see if it is order again. Oh.

Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Let's go!

I know you're doing the... Yeah. Mm-hmm. Come on. You know what's funny is I love Wolf of Wall Street. That scene never does... I don't even think of that scene. Oh, I love that scene.

I don't dislike it, but I have trouble getting all revved up about McConaughey. That's his only scene, right? That you got to pump those numbers up? It's very clear that that's like he didn't have much time to shoot that movie and well he still looks like Dallas Buyers Club

and he's supposed to be a Wall Street guy and he's still kind of dead looking yeah he's a freak in that scene he's a freak in the sheets too my god

I was in this guy railed me alright we're gonna talk about that off the air too blew my back out folks we'll see ya at the Cider Bar me. Alright, we're going to talk about that off the air too. Blew my bag out. Folks, we'll see you at the Cider Bar. The concept here is

if we can get it, we have it. So cider from all across the globe. They usually get no representation on other menus. You know, it's all beer, one or two ciders. Exactly. That's good. So a hundred ciders and a few beers, a few wines, but cider is our focus. Sick.

I would say our cider deal, like we're not like cider guys. In fact, like these guys are kind of almost anti-cider. Not anti-cider. I don't want to say that now. I love cider. I love cider. I was telling him like the, and I'm not like, I haven't had tons, but I feel like the moment for me is like, I kind of thought of it as like, I'm not really into sweet stuff, and I kind of thought of it as in the fall, if I'm on a pumpkin ride or something.

But then I was in London, and I had my first ever dry, light cider that was really crushable. And I was like, okay, I'm into this. So I've been having them since then. So that's what I like. If there's anything you would recommend that's almost just like the lager of ciders that's nice and crisp and light, that's a good way in, like a 101 cider.

Right, right. I wasn't expecting this. I don't want to give you guys, I don't know how you want to do it, but I kind of want to give you some taste of what's on draft just to get a good taste. I think we should do like a little, tasty something.

Yeah, little, little guys to get us going. Cheers. Bottoms up. Being, being good. Spanish cider. I think it's a little half glasses too. Well, yeah, this, first we had the Spanish one was an eye-opener for me because it was almost savory. Tasted like olives.

Loved it. Then the French one was still very dry, tiptoeing more towards cider. Now we're getting into some of this pear stuff. Is there that much stuff in the pear? Yeah, a little bit of the sediment. Oh, is that what that is? Okay. You're going to want that sediment, though. It's good. It's good for you.

We've had about nine ciders so far. Yeah, we've had about nine ciders. And. Yeah, we've had about nine ciders. And, like, the American ones are all good. They all do feel like we're heading a little bit more middle of the road than the early French and Spanish ones had a nice, like, distinct stank on them. They don't, like, punch. The American ones don't have, like, punch you very hard. I don't feel like I'm eating a rotten apple, you know?

The apple brandy cider we just had was really good. We are cidered out here. Folks, we just left Alma's. We're on the sidewalk out here in Virgil Village where the goings

on happen. The traffic is on the street. We're not far from Squirrel where they famously had mold in their jelly. Oh, right, right. She don't use jelly. I'm kidding. Now, first reactions. That's more cider than I've ever had. We got a full tour.

First off, this bar was a very cozy, wonderful little spot, and the bartender, Lee, gave us a whole trip around the world. We had Spanish cider. We had French cider. We had Swiss cider. Then we brought it back home with some American ones that were flavored. But here was the thing. He started us off.

He said he likes to give us, first you try the Spanish because it obliterates your idea of what cider is. Because it tasted like olives, basically. It was like vinegar. Yeah. He said it was like a sour, like a sour beer. Then he worked his way around and kind of as we got to the Swiss, you're like, that's what we were, there's a bubbly apple. Right.

And then we got into some. The more British and American ones and the blends. Yeah. And then we were, then we were fully just having like a Vermont one that's made with gin botanicals, and it comes out of a can, and it's a fun little variation. But for me, overall, you know me. I'm a guy who likes the sticky, stanky, stinky, stink. I get nasty.

You're a nasty boy. I like fermented shit. I like funky stuff. I like orange wines that have a stank on them. So I enjoyed learning about, you know, the takeaway is like you got to like fermentation because you're eating, you're drinking fermented, you're drinking rotten fruit, right? Yeah. So my favorite was the more kind of savory ones and the Spanish one that tasted like olives was my favorite. But I really loved, as you might predict, I loved kind of everything I tasted.

And I liked that I didn't have, nothing was sweet, nothing was cloying, nothing made my teeth feel like I had soda. Right. Standouts to me? What stood out to me was the cucumber ginger. That had a, that is a swayed by the smell thing. I was almost suede to not even sip it it tasted good to me i loved the smell but then when i tasted i said hey

if i'm at a it's it's august and i'm at a wedding outdoors and it's hot and i want to cool down to be wet um the bride in your room i uh this was crushable that was what you would call crushable. I think the most traditional cidery taste that I'm used to that I liked was the Swiss one that just came to town. They just had an event here last night. It's convenient that it was new yesterday. And that was the one that... You've never been to the U.S., I don't think. Right.

New to the States. never been to the u.s i don't think right new to the states and uh we had just come off the the more vinegary traditional french and spanish ones that use the heirloom apples see we don't have those heirloom apples because during prohibition heirloom apples weren't good eaten a cider apple isn't a good eaten apple so america we lost out on all those nice strains and you know what i will say my least i was least impressed with the American ciders. Same. And I think that's been my takeaway is that my negative opinion

of ciders were the ones that were trying to be most like loggers or trying to fit in with like at an American bar. And if you just meet a cider on its own terms that's what it is. It's not afraid to be a cider like you said, Jeff. They're not afraid to be themselves.

Please. I love that we're just categorized. Because we didn't listen to the names of these ciders or write them down. We're just going by country. I don't think he told us the names because I think he knew. He showed us the labels. We took some pictures, but this place had a hundred ciders. Sure, sure.

But I was impressed that he knew like all. But just in general with us, like I love treating, we're acting like nice try France, but it's like America. There's no exaggeration. There's 3000 ciders made in America and we're saying, oh, USA, don't go. As far as I'm concerned, they haven't gotten one of them right. You like the cucumber one. Yeah, that's cucumber soda, basically.

Come on now. He said it himself. I don't want to get us too far off topic of ciders here. Why? But there were a couple little flourishes that Lee gave us, and those were my highlights. It's like when we started to get into some of these distilled things, there was this cider that this stuff that was um apple brandy folks with a little cider in it and you know timmy likes cognac you know i like a nice warm little sipper and that shit was good then he brought stuff though it wasn't what was it card cardoma

we gotta look this up we'll say it in the outro but it was uh it was pure apple it was basically 80 proof apple brandy yes and this at this point it's it's cider that has been distilled you're basically having rye it's a crispy whiskey taste and it's lighting up the mouth and i was enjoying all those perfumey fermenty stanky ciders but you know when you just stop fucking around yeah just it's like you know grappa you ever had grappa at a winery where it's just like yeah you've had all the wines but here's the real shit i pronounce it i pronounce it grape yeah yeah well you can well don't forget you'd be wrong don't forget about your college roommate matt grana that's true um speaking of ithaca jeff when you're saying you know when you're at a winery and then they bring out the grappa i was

with you at a winery i know the moment you're talking about the one I discovered the three of us video but you're acting like it's like I'm always hanging out wineries but then when that comes out oh I was with you and you didn't like it now who's who's singing a different tune about cider because I know I am Michael the tune the tune i'm singing are we doing final thoughts here no all right i'll save my tune your current tune my current tune is uh i loved the miniature setup they had they had a little bunch of miniature cars and things and a little case the ambiance the ambiance is That's true. Not to get too hyper-local, but if you live in Los Angeles, Alma's Bar here is an amazing place to go on a date.

It's a warm little boutique. I will be back for sure. The music was cool. And this is curated. There was very good jazz music that was hand-picked. There was little miniature cars. Little dioramas built into the windowsill. The light fixtures were beautiful.

The stereo system was vintage and beautiful. Everything was really inviting. And I'll tell you what else. Lee, the tender who served us, fish fan. Good guy. Good guy. Good guy. I like a guy like that.

All right. Well, folks, we'll see you back at the house. And we're back in the living room. It's nice to be home. You know, as fun as it was to have a wild episode where we went on the world, I got homesick. Yeah, me too. It's good to be back. I don't know if you guys saw at one point I went to the bathroom and I went,

Everyone heard that. Is he okay? He's fine. I said, Mike, we gotta get him home. Remember, at another point I went, I said, Mike, we gotta get him home. Put him down. Put him to sleep. Put him down to kill him?

No, you do it with a toddler. Yeah, yeah. Put his favorite video on, then we'll put him down. If I'm ever sort of in pain, you guys can pull the plug on me. Whoa! Never. In pain? Keep me alive in pain?

Oh, shit. Okay. There you go. Well, how long is the... Okay. Yeah, anytime. Let's say, for example, there's an alligator biting my dick. Uh-huh. Pull the plug on me.

You give me... If we're out and you're feeling in a bad shape, you give me two quick winks in the left eye. Yeah. I'm out. Left eye Lopez. Or give me one of the old, like, you sort of wave in front of your neck. Like, okay, that's it. Cut it off. That's enough of this. your neck. Like, okay, that's it.

Cut it off. That's enough of this. That's enough. Shut it down. All right. He's gone. He's a goner. You're tearing into your underberg.

Oh, are we doing this now? I don't know. Well, these come with a paper foreskin on the top of the bottle. Have we even talked about what these are yet? Folks, this is, the bartender there gave us Underberg, I think he called it Underberg. Underberg Natural Herb Bitters. It's a teeny little bottle. It says, after a good meal. And we said, what's this?

And he says, it's kind of a hipster way to end your day. And we said, that works for us. And he said, a lot of these bars have been carrying these. And I said, Lee, I've never seen one in my goddamn life. Fork them over, dude. And he said, I'll oblige. No, he gave them to us. We didn't ask for them.

But I like that. I like this, the tradition of a little paper shooter. 44% alcohol? Yipes. That's going to get us crunked up and skunked up. And it says right on there, after a good meal, to feel bright and alert. To feel bright and alert. To feel bright and alert. Oh.

Interesting. Wonderburg is an herb bitters taken for digestion. It is not a beverage, not to be sipped, but taken all at once and quickly because of its aromatic, strong taste. It is also used as a flavoring. Boom. Here's what I might do. I'm going to take it off the cap. Then I'm going to up the butt.

Then I'm going to handstand. And then... Okay. Lee was also saying this is like, if you shoot it, it's a taste. And if you pour it out into something it's a different taste and he said

it's worse he said don't do that he also said if you have the caps these little green caps this is a cool this is a cute little it looks awesome

it's a very cute little bottle I took pictures so we could post it this is if you keep the caps you send them into you cash them in yeah and you can win

like a a bandolero belt where you can stick all these little things into it or... It's a whole world and we're into the scene. If we like the taste. If we like the taste. Ooh, the smell. This is licorice.

Shall we? I'm going to crack it. Yeah. Okay. Ooh. Wunderbar. Ready? I like this.

Hey, bottoms up. To cider. Mmm? I like this. Bottoms up. To cider. Zing. Ooh. Ouch. Well, because of the narrow neck of the bottle, you can't really shoot it. It just dumps slowly into your mouth.

It takes a while. It's funny because I like that. Oh, fuck. It's like a really strong burn of kind of an Amaro Black Ligure Shade. But if I could shoot it back, it would be fun. But it trickles into your mouth so slow. I feel like I got pranked. Lee Proud. Ouch.

I do feel bright and alert. Me too. And it's sure to invigorate the anus tomorrow morning. This was interesting. Yeah, it's a nice burn in the throat. I'm not getting rid of that burn. No. For a while.

It's clovey. Uh-huh. Not just licorice. Clove. I actually don't know if it's licorice at all. I always just say that, but it's specific. This is definitely a challenge shot. We've talked about challenge shots before, or at the end of the night,

hey, who's doing a fireball? I'm doing one. Are you doing one? Yeah, fuck you. Oh, yeah. This is one the night, hey, who's doing a fireball? I'm doing one. You doing one? Yeah, fuck you. Oh, yeah. That's what I'm doing. Yeah, who wants to make sure they don't get laid tonight, huh? Why wouldn't you get laid?

No. That is not the point. At the end of the night at the bar, who's doing Jaeger bombs? No, no, no. Who's doing Jaeger bombs? Jaeger moms. Jaeger bombs for Jaeger moms. Jager bombs for Jager moms. Come on out.

Jager bombs. They say if you get too hammered, you don't get to nail. Oh, Jeff. Wisdom. You talk like that. Wisdom on the pod. That's also, it's one of those play on words things where it sounds like it works. The sexual meaning works, but then when you're like...

Tim? The carpentry meaning of it doesn't work. You get too hammered, you don't get to nail. It doesn't... Too hammered? You have a hammer. So if you get hammered, you now have a hammer. Yeah.

If you get too hammered, you don't get to nail. But why... If you're building a roof... Yeah. It's not about the carpentry, Tim. This is what I'm saying. Oh, it's more of a sexual thing. The carpentry aspect just gets you going.

How about this? Uh-huh. You get too inebriated, you don't get to fornicate. That's a little more on the nose. Yeah. Here's my final thoughts about us, the Ciders. Hit me. I don't like them.

I don't like them. After a night like we had? After a night like we shared? I know. I don't like them. I don't like them. I would be fascinated to just have your palate for one night and just feel what they like to have food, have drinks.

Dislike it. Loves OJ. Anything two degrees away from OJ, dislike. You couldn't handle this palate. Here's the thing. I like it in the sense that I can drink it without puking. And I can drink it and

have a fun time and say, oh, this is good. This and that. I just don't want more of it. That's what I mean by don't like. I don't. Okay. I don't. I didn't have anything to.

You're saying it's not in order again. Not in order again. And Lee, I hope, if Lee, you're listening, I love you, buddy. And I was so happy to meet you. I'm glad you're a fish fan. And I just, this might just not be the thing for me, but I'm still going to come to your bar because it's a cool bar. It is a lovely bar.

And yeah, well, you're not blaming Lee. He gave us a trip around the world and you're saying, you just like, you don't want your fruits fermented. Yeah. I don't want my fruits fermented.

Do you think part of that is that you, you've spent a couple of years even acclimating to beer? You know, like when you first try beer, you don't, you're not like, Oh, I want more of this taste of this taste right right and then culturally you're just like well everybody drinks this and it's awesome uh to party yeah but i mean i just had my first shot of underberg and i loved it you loved it yeah it made me bright and alert after dinner yeah well it's an order again

for me and uh I'll say, I think I turned a bit of a corner on cider tonight. Now, I'm not going out to the bars looking for cider now. Oh, interesting. So this isn't an order again, but you like it? This is...

This is when we bring a human element in. Lee, you're trying to be nice. No. Don't be nice, Jeff. No. Be nasty. Be nasty. I feel like Lee you're trying to you're trying to be nice no don't be nice Jeff no be nasty be nasty I feel like

I like these ciders I enjoyed that a lot am I gonna drink like an angry orchard no I don't no

you know and neither would Lee right and that's not what we had and that's that's what was illuminating for me is I've had some of this type

of shit before but i really liked you know angry orchard is a once a year i'll have a like i said i'm on a hayride i'll have an angry orchard or whatever other shit you got your arm wrapped around a scarecrow yeah exactly what are you drinking buddy your fucking brain get the fuck off um zombie um no i'm kidding but the crumb baddies what was illuminating for me today was it remind me of when i went to a a mead vineyard or whatever that's called and tasted some means you're like well this is all this is a hundred and i was drinking these ciders and saying i understand if anyone doesn't like the taste of fermented stuff because it is isn't it weird that like a lot of the greatest delicacies in life uh you know are

rotten blue cheese red wine truffles, gross. Fresh apples. These are brand new grapes. Yes. What are you talking about? These are my favorite tastes. And also, I'll admit, they're a little bit repugnant. You get to something to get over. And the fermentation does something that for me where it's like it's hitting me in a new way.

And it's exciting. And I really like the flavors i had tonight i like these kind of delicate ciders where we're just having little sips and i didn't feel like i was it shouldn't be swapped in for a beer you shouldn't be trying to have a big pint of this and be like i'm having beer i think that these are more fragrant little sippers yeah think if you think of it more like wine or like a halfway point between wine and beer. You do yourself well. That's interesting.

You're talking about the repugnant taste. Something that wakens us up. The thing that... The thing that you don't like. You watch the trashy reality shows. I like that. You watch the slap, the Oscar slap. Ooh, I like that. You watch the slap, the Oscar slap.

Ooh, I like that. I want more of it. You want, we want crap. Well, how about a challenging, you're going the wrong direction here, Mike. I'm saying. Yes. I'm wrong.

Happens from time to time. I think that when you're saying reality TV, you're going a trashy direction where that to me that's like do i like eating uh you know a big barrel of cheese balls those little puffs peas balls i do yes i love them but i know i'm that's that's reality tv right i'm going the other direction i said you know uh stinky cheese stinky stinky wine, truffles. I'm saying the elevated stuff

where you only want a little bit of it. It's challenging to your palate, not unlike the music of Philip Glass. Well, that's interesting to me because that's all I listen to these days. Is that the only thing you've ever listened to? Not the only thing I've ever listened to, but these days that's all I listen to. days. Is that the only thing you've ever listened to? Not the only thing I've ever listened to, but these days that's all I listen to.

But you know when you're listening to Rachmaninoff and you're saying, oh. You know, I don't know if I've ever heard, I've, you know, Rachmaninoff is a reference. I don't know if I've ever heard a Rachmaninoff tale. Track.

Which one? I'll spin you a yarn of a rock is he a writer or he's a penis he's a composer my man um i'll tell you rock my enough to one time he was playing those ivories and then he had a couple of the ebony's as well rock my enough what a name you gotta talk to your boy, Cassidy. He knows all that Rock Mononoff. I'll call him up tomorrow. Mike, sorry to wake you up so early. Rock Mononoff, what do you know?

Fill me in, bud. Fill me in, pal. Do you have the internet? No, I know I do, but you got to tell me. I go by Office Depot and get one of those CDs with the free hours of AOL. I think those must be up to, if they're still doing that, that must be up to 100,000 hours. Yeah.

That's so funny. We used to get those in the mail. It's like, what even was that? What a weird scam. And then we get like higher and higher in the amounts of time. Higher and higher. It's a thing is a well still even a thing yeah mitch mitch has an aol email it is odd yeah what about netscape navigator that's another one that's what i used at ithaca or prodigy Prodigy was the first one I had heard of

I didn't ever use it but I remember hearing Mom, Dad, there's something called Prodigy Prodigy was the first Way people Described me as a student In middle school The first way, what was the second? We were wrong about Prodigy

Dumbass Dumbass fuckface Fuck you back. Dumbass fuck face. Fuck, you can't say that to me. That's our show. Follow us on social media at The Sloppy Boys, where we release these recipes ahead of time. That doesn't really make sense for this episode. I guess cans and bottles of cider. Bottles and cans of just crappy hands.

Unless you have a cider recipe. Yeah. Well, you know, you can check us out if you want more boys on patreon.com slash the sloppy boys. Listen to the sloppy boys blow out our weekly bonus episode where we talk about going to the mall and cooking eggs and running a mile. This week was Dave and Buster's. That was fun. Yeah, don't make it sound boring. It's going to the mall, cooking eggs.

Cooking eggs. Cooking eggs! Egg bake! Oh, Mikey, you made me a great egg bake the other day. I made him an egg in a hole today, Tim. I did? I did. I paid him back. Good stuff.

Yeah. A little too salty. I think you put a lot of salt on that thing, Joe. You say that to me on the pod? I don't know why you say that to him on the pod. Pepper's enough. On the pod. You know what, Mike?

I think it would be proper if that topic came up and you say, Jeff, can I talk to you in the other room? Yeah. You go over there and you say, too salty. Here's what I'll say. I don't feel like you're hoarding ammunition all day to release against me on the pod. Well, that is exactly what I'm doing because I know we need content. It's king.

It's king. Jeff makes the egg in a hole. Good, good. It all tastes good. A little salty. And I said from the other room, I said, hey, make the hash browns too. You know, I bought. What were you doing in the other room?

I was working on my computer. And I'm still kind of waiting for those hash browns. I don't know why he didn't make those. What happened, Jeff? I do remember when you vaguely requested also having me make your hash browns. It's vague. It's vague. I do remember when you vaguely requested also having me make you hash browns. Vague is vague. I don't know how vague it is to say, hey, and also make those hash browns. Hey, also make those hash browns.

That I purchased. Was it one of those bags? It's a bag. Very easy to make. We had just enough for the two of us. Would have been perfect to zero out that bag. I don't know what you were doing in the kitchen. I was almost going to come in and say,

hey, you're making those hash browns. You didn't do it. And when I got my plate, great, I got two eggs in a hole, but I didn't get the hash browns. I don't know what the fuck you were doing. See, here's the thing. I know you're joking because you like to make,

you like to make some fun on the pot. Yeah, not exactly joking. But I think it's coming from a serious place because you're such a square meal man. That's right. This guy likes his sides. He doesn't want just the main. He doesn't want just the main. He needs a little starchy.

No. I got starched with the, yeah, no, I did not. And I just know Jeff's got a lot on his plate these days. And I wanted to ride him in the kitchen, and I didn't want to. So then at the end, I suffer. So I'm being nice, and I don't get what I want. Would you say you suffered severely? Let's see.

When you think of suffering, you think of Christ. Do you think? Yeah. Because you look down at your plate, no potatoes. Then you say, that's okay. I've got an egg in the hole. I'll eat it. I just hope it's not too salty. Then you take a bite. Because you look down at your plate, no potatoes. Then you say, that's okay. I've got an egg in the hole. I'll eat it. I just hope it's not too salty.

Then you take a bite. Oh, yeah. I looked down at my plate, no potatoes. I was like, okay, I'll look over at Jeff's plate. I'll crane my neck over. He must be having the potatoes. He'll scoop some over me. Oh, Jeff doesn't have any potatoes either.

The potatoes were not cooked. Fine. So Jeff didn't want me to have potatoes for some reason. So I'm going to try the eggs. And well, salt as far as I can see. And he knows I've got a blood pressure problem and he knows salt is a big problem. This was pretty much a murder attempt. Yeah, why do you think I'm getting out of here, Mark? Tim, I'm trying to make this boy pop.

Trying to fill him up with blood. Yeah, you've got beautiful white walls In this apartment I'd hate to make a mess With your splashing blood Bingo Folks It was a good episode

We got out there in the world this time We sure did We do that on the blowout a little more Check it out The blowout is actually where we have the most fun. This is a job. The blowout is fun. This show sucks.

Yeah. Our passion is the blowout. Yes. This is... My passion is fashion. Well. Well. We'll talk about that.

Goodbye, folks. Stick around for the organ counter melody you've always wanted to hear The wall rains