The Smark Avengers - Vol 4, Ep 29: Can Magneto Survive THIS?! | Ridiculous Death Scenarios

Episode Date: September 12, 2025

🧲 Can Magneto, the Master of Magnetism, actually be killed? In this episode of Smark Avengers, Corey and Dylan come up with the most ridiculous, over-the-top, and sometimes oddly plausible ways to take down one of Marvel’s most powerful mutants—while Jon decides if any of them could actually work. From giant magnets to impenetrable force fields, from bee swarms to family drama with Quicksilver and Scarlet Witch, we put Magneto through every bizarre scenario possible. Is there any weakness Marvel hasn’t explored yet… or is Magneto truly unstoppable? 👥 In this episode we cover: Can Magneto be beaten by science… or nonsense? How his children could be the key to his downfall Giant magnets vs. the Master of Magnetism Bees… yes, actual bees 🐝 The line between clever strategy and pure comic book chaos If you’ve ever wondered how Marvel’s villains could really be taken out, this is the wild, hilarious deep dive you didn’t know you needed. 💬 What’s YOUR idea for how to kill Magneto? Drop your theories in the comments—we’ll feature our favorites in a future episode! 👉 Don’t forget to like, subscribe, and ring the bell so you don’t miss more comic book debates, watch-alongs, and superhero deep dives from the Smark Avengers crew. Click the link for Dylan's radio show!: http://www.bouncedigitalradio.co.uk Click the link for Dylan's Twitch stream: http://Twitch.tv/spookylaroux Click the link for Jon's Letterboxd: https://letterboxd.com/bigjonbowski/ Click the link for Corey's project "Henry's Usual": https://www.tumblr.com/henrysusual Click the link for Corey's show "Large Old Cup": https://open.spotify.com/show/2YHMppnl9inQevwLIxR64f

But this is not... Well, you know, life is like a hurricane. Here in Duckburg. Race cars? Yeah, Blazors. Blazes airplanes. Here in Duckburg. It's a Duckburg?

It's a... The Duckler? Yeah. Myself a mystery? Or rewrite history? Or rewrite history? Duckteals? A woohoo?

Woohoo. Hi, everybody. Welcome, Stark Avengers. That's the opening. Don't question me on Duckteal. Oh, boy. All right, that's the opening. We've had a couple of false open so far,

but I think we're going to just start with us singing the Duck Tales theme. Talking about Doctails for 20 minutes? Yeah, we're going to cut that out. We'll just do the intro. Okay. Hi, everybody, welcome, Spark Avengers. My name is Corey, and with me is Dylan and John. How's it going, fellas?

It's all good. All right. Well, we are going to be heading into territories of the macab and the morbid as we come together in our dark coven, our sisterhood of darkness that we have established over many episodes where we unite as one with the sole purpose of killing off a character. So what started with us killing off Aquaman turned into us making a stab at the flash and then killing off Wolverine.

Today it's going to be a bit of a departure as traditionally I, serve as the information guru or moderator between you and John, as you tell me your various ways you're going to try to kill off a character. However, that being said, the character that we are going to be attempting to assassinate is someone who is near and dear to John's heart. So we're going to flip the roles a little bit. John, who are we killing today, or at least trying to? I was going to say, emphasis on trying to. Magneto, the one and only. The master of magnetism. Indeed. So traditionally what we do a little bit is we give some background on Magneto's power sets, what makes him special, what makes him difficult to kill.

And then it's off to the races as Dylan and I tell John how we would attempt to bump off the master of magnetism. The man known as Eric Magnus or Joseph or whatever other various names he's had. Yeah. Well, I think we just talk about how Magneto has a lot of them. access to the speed force? Yes. He's able to tap into the speed force. He could rewrite history.

That's going to take like... What about his magic hand? He's water hand out. He has his magic metal hand. That'll take like 45 minutes of the show. Yep. Yep. Lessons were learned with the Flash episode.

That is for sure. Lessons were learned. I was telling somebody about our Flash episodes. Dude, we spent 45 to 50 minutes just talking about the flash before we got to kill the flash

because I remember there being a point where I was like we gotta we have to stop we have to kill this like we're talking about it we just need to just fill the lungs of cement

we got 45 minutes in and we were on to the third of four flashes yeah it was too much it was too much too many flashes except that bad too many flashes

too many flashes so thankfully there's only one magneto though yes well two if you count the one that's some threesome it's there though

Zorn does that count as a magneto Joseph he just showed back up apparently what why we didn't we didn't write it I don't know he's just there

oh my God well John you'll like explain a bit about Magneto and then me and Corey will try to kill him okay well let's dig into some of Magneto's powers and whatnot because you did a whole episode on his history so we don't really need to cover that again but yeah Magneto he's like an omega-level mutant one of the most powerful mutants in the entire Marvel universe and some would say he has pretty much limitless power as well so good luck guys

um his main ability is apparently something called magnetokinesis which is the ability to generate and control magnetic fields you know you're the best when they fucking name it after you exactly

um which is it's like he can do like uh you know regular magnetism he can do electro-magnetism as well which also sort of delves into like the electrons and

articles and stuff if you really want to get technical so he he can even like use his powers on metals which aren't traditionally magnetic as well he's that powerful

right that doesn't sound correct well That's what the comics say. It does sound like somebody came up with a loophole. Yeah. Magneto can use a magnetic powers against non-magnetic material.

I don't know if that's correct. I mean, it's not just like metal material that comes down to stuff like the iron in people's blood. Yes. He can create like magnetic force fields out of

the particles in the air and even like sense sort of disturbances in the earth magnetic field that's like how deep his powers go and yeah like speaking of his force field

it's pretty much always active apparently when he's not like fighting people he's always got like a little bit of a force field going on and it's powerful enough that it's protected to him from the likes of Thor hitting him with Molnia,

Hercules bashing him, or even Spider-Man when he was powered by the Uni-Power. Really? Not only that, yeah. Not only that, he's even withstood a nuclear warhead at Ground Zero using his force field. And apparently it's even protected him in like extreme heat. falling in lava or you're going to say falling in love from the what yeah so yeah so yeah I'm going to have to cross some of these things off my list but not only is this fourth field pretty nifty he's also got his ms well which might look like you know

a suit made of cloth with a bit of metal bits and bobs here and there, but apparently it's all made out of metal and he can like increase the like

durability of it as well with his powers, so it can basically become akin to adamantium. So, yep, good luck piercing that. Okay. Is that bullshit, though? Yeah, I don't know how making something, how

how making something more magnetic makes it more durable. Unless it's just like, it's going to be constantly pulling out so you can't like push in because there's something constantly pushing it out. It's science. You just can't argue with science. Is it?

Well, then I'm going to use science later on. So remember that. Remember science. Just keep that abreast. What else can Magnetia do? fly for pretty long distances and he can even go into space using his like a force field as well he apparently he has such control over the electromagnetic force that he can even shut off gravity within a limited radius of himself

by basically reversing the polarity of Earth's own magnetic field I'm going to point out just two things here it sounds like comic book writers have no idea how magnetism works right and it also sounded for his second I was like so he's like the third Doctor Who no matter what the problem is it's just well we're reverse the polarity of the

neutron flow and it'll be fine yeah basically basically. I'm going to say like, there's a lot of stuff going on here. Like, I don't know how being really good at controlling like magnetic waves makes this that you don't need to breathe in space. Because you, oh, well, you create a bubble. It's like, but what's the bubble made out of? Correct. Right. What the fuck? It's a vague bubble.

What do you mean? This is, you know, Stanley's Marvel. Stanley is famous for loving a good magnet and a good transistor. it was in all of his heroes like power sets back in the day listen we were talking a bit about when we were going over our episode we were talking about like the weird

Aquaman villains how like magnetism and electricity kept coming up I really do think that was like the 1960s people realized hey man there's something really going on with this magnet business we got to get in on that I like the idea that people are like hey man magnets are going to be big we got to put magnets

in our show. Because magnets and then like 30 years time magnets are going to be big business and 30 years later they're like we have fucking tape players. The kids are crazy about it. They're absolutely nuts.

But you have a fuck about magnet. Yeah. And Stanley's like, oh, fuck I made Magneto. I should have made tip player man. I'm going to take this out on my artists. You know? DVD player man. I'm in

Dreaming man. So many bits, you know. If I ever worked the... What? Well, I was going to say, since you guys aren't keen on the magnetic part of the powers, we could move on to, like, some of his other abilities,

because, I mean, I've only seen him do it once, but he can apparently, like, project himself into the astral plane. What are? I mean, Dr. Strange,

I don't know. I mean, Dr. Strange learned how to, do that. So I mean, it was basically in his Transcendental Meditation. He managed to do it. Dr. Strange can do that. Professor Axe can do that. Shadow King can do. Magneto, the master of magnetism. It just be like, oh yeah, fuck back. I can just go into the asshole play in now.

I was going to say transcendental meditation could do that, but also he doesn't strike me as somebody that would practice meditation because I don't think Magneto has had a calm day in his life. No. It's a busy guy. How does that work? He's also telepathically resistant as well. So even without the helmet.

Oh, fuck off, dude. Without the helmet, yeah. But the helmet obviously... Looks cool. I don't know, because it looks cool. Yeah. Looks good. The whole point of the helmet is that it's resistant to telepathy.

So why would he also, without the helmet, still have that resistance? Why have the helmet? Because he's so great, that's why. Speaking of, he's got a genius-level intellect as well. He's an expert in genetic engineering and mutation, as we saw with him creating the Savage Land mutates. He's created several artificial living beings, like our old friend Alpha, the Ultimate Mutant.

um yeah he's apparently even no of course not uh he's even mutated humans to give them superpowers and use like genetic mind control and created adult clones of humans and uh yeah done all sorts of stuff like that so he's a pretty smart guy as well as being all powerful well i mean i've covered most of it but i will say one of his last and most important uh like not skills but kind of not even an ability it's just like part of who he is is

his indomitable will where he's like willing to do whatever it takes whether that you know doing morally bankrupt things to kind of get ahead whether that's killing or threatening

nuclear holocaust or whatever or like just his dry to like do the impossible whether it's pulling a gigantic space bullet back towards Earth so

Kitty Pride can be rescued or trying to stop an incursion from an alternate reality by using all of his power to try and you know repel this alternate Earth from gliding with their own

he has like a big you know kind of desire, I guess, to kind of get what he wants. And that can be pretty tough to beat. Okay. That's going to factor very heavily into R. So, John, as the judge of this, what are you looking for in determining, is this a viable

plan to kill Magneto? Like, what are your bullet points? I mean, I think you guys are going to. struggle to find ways which are going to be acceptable to me for killing Magneto. I think it's got to be smart. It's got to be effective and, you know, I don't know. I'm just sort of intrigued to see what you guys have come up with more than anything else. Okay.

Okay. So Dylan, would you like to go first? Yeah, I would love to. By all means. So you were like, well, you know, the guy, the master magnetism, how do you like, how do you kill the sky? How do you like properly take him down? I learned a lot from our last episode. I think it was last episode, maybe the one before that.

I've also learned a lot from John when it comes to killing a character. So my first idea how to kill Magneto is to just give him syphilis. Son of a bitch! That was one of my plans!

No way. When we were doing our, and this is if you're listening to this and you want to hear more of in-depth conversation about Magneto than just the various powers he has. We had a was, it was a one-parter.

It should have been a two-parter. We squeezed it into one part about the history of Magneto. A couple of months ago, by only to check that out. But one of the things that we discussed was Magneto got around quite a bit. Love.

Love it. I was fucking a bitch. Love this. I don't blame that. No, I get it. I get it. So that's why I thought, And what was it last episode of the one before that?

Where we were talking about somebody who had a syplis a lot. Climidia. And that kept coming up. So I was like, well, obviously the best way to kill Magneto is he loves fucking a bitch, give him syphilis. And then, I mean, obviously, I will have Cyplus to give to him. But it will also kill him. So it balances out, you know. So you're the aforementioned bitch in your scenario?

I think that if I fucked Magneto, I would be the. bitch, right? Okay. I mean, I mean, that's the fact, isn't it? So my, to kind of build on your idea on that end, what we know about Magneto is, A, he gets around, B, he is very haughty about his belief in mutant superiority. And Magneto being up his own ass enough about mutant superiority, he would absolutely write it off. Kind of like how when Al Capone got, you know, syphilis, he didn't think to do anything about

it because he was big shot Al Capone, right? So he's walking around, pus leaking out of his penis going, yep, this is what, this is how men do it. This is I'm Al Capone. That's how it's supposed to work. That's how it's supposed to. Proof of Magneto's superior seed. It's leaking out of him at all possible times.

Next thing you know, he's seeing shit that's not there. He's shitting himself constantly pissing and trying to fish in a swimming pool. And then he just dies a slow miserable death. Oh, yeah, yeah. That sounds really normal to me. Yeah. I mean, I was expecting this episode to be like, oh, he gets hit by a car or something. Not dies by syphilis.

How could he get hit by a car? It's made of metal. Unless. Yeah, well, it was good enough for Wolverine and I'll have. Yeah, it's a fucking Flintstone's car which made out of rocks and the fucking dittling it. I had the same thought. Dylan, we're on a wavelength right now, and I don't know if that's good or bad because you've been drinking all day. I've not been.

For a long time. He certainly has a record. Thank you for that. Nice note to give me. There you go. Yeah. So what do you think about syphilis as a way to kill McGinnis? I mean, as a disease first.

I wasn't prepared for it. Not many people are when they get it. Disease first. Disease first and then way to kill Magnino's sex. in I'm I'm be honest

this one has caught me off guard and I think this I'd be we both were in the same year we were both immediately the first thing we both wrote was

syphilis it really was there you go was scivum syphilis congrats you've already killed Magneo we prayed a

upon his weakness. That's the end of the show. A hot piece of ass. John, how many films do you watch? Let's hear some of your other ideas. For the sake of a show, that's going a little bit longer. This one I think might be more than what John was sick of the wife. Because I thought, well, why don't we like Wiley Coyote drop a big rock on him?

Yeah. like he's in the middle of like a canyon and then you just drop a rock on him well i mean we sort of established he's got this uh force field which can withstand uh a nuclear glass so i don't think a rock's going to do that much damage to him you think that like if i dropped without him knowing about it if i just dropped a rock on him he would be able to know because that force field up without him Knowing about it? Like I say, he pretty much has his horse wield on all the time, even when he's not, like, that already. But does he?

But does he though? Yeah, apparently. But, like, though, but does he? It was on the internet, and, you know, everything's true. Actually, you know, like, does he? But really, though, like, does he? Yes. Yeah, yeah.

All right. All right. But, like, does he, though? So your second plan is Big Rock. Yes. My second plan involves this idea of he has all of these abilities, but his weakness will always be reaction time, is how quickly can he react. And so you kind of have to play some things against him in a manner of speaking. One of his greatest failures as a person is, you kind of.

is being a decent father figure. And one of those people that he has failed as a father routinely would be his kind of son, hard to tell at this point, Quicksilver. I think if you exploited both of their emotional attachments to Wanda, you could create a scenario where you could enrage Quicksilver enough to try to kill his dad. And I think that, you know, I mean, he's not as fast as the Flash. Quicksilver does not have access to the speed force, which we have established. Still fast enough to hit someone hard enough to break their neck on the whiplash, though.

And I think, I think you could, if you got a pissed off Quicksilver, you could one shot Magneto and he wouldn't even know it. I would like you to, like, establish more, because I think that's a great concept. But, like, why, like, specifically would that work? I think that could, that actually is a really good idea, but like, like, what would you do? Quicksilver and then what would Quicksilver do to like killed McNeil?

I mean, here's the thing. When it comes to Quicksilver, I really love the character. I enjoy his arrogance and just what a piece of shitty is a lot of the time. I think he's fun for that reason. One of his glaring flaws is the fact that he is absolutely

codependent on Scarlet Witch. And I think all you would really have to do is, hey, your dad's going to take her away from you. You're never going to see her again. go into a blind fucking rage about it. You can't see your sister anymore. Not allowed to see her anymore, Pietro. Magnia is going to take her up into space.

Yeah, I don't know about that. I've seen them try to kill each other at the end of House of M. And it felt like it was essentially the same argument of, oh, you are terrible for Wanda. You're going to ruin her life. And the Quicksilver goes, no, uh. I feel like they don't have, it doesn't take a lot of depth to get Quicksilver ready to find.

his dad of his sister is involved. I don't know. I'm not convinced. I think maybe you could make an argument for that, for like the Quicksilver of old, but I don't think Quicksilver nowadays is that hot-headed enough to, like, you know, act so rashly to, you know, like try and kill Magneto over something like that. Now, he doesn't have to try to kill him.

Magneto. You get somebody in a blind enough rage. It's a crime of passion at that point where their emotions take over and they don't have control over themselves any longer. Because for someone to run as fast as Pietro not to constantly blow up anybody they happen to bump into just from sheer speed and like force, takes a lot of restraint. You remove the restraint, he just becomes a running battering ram. It's like getting hit at a car at any time. So there's your, you know, run Magneto over with a car, but his car is his son. Pietro. What I would say is, if we need to really dial it up, we take one of the characters we talked

about on a recent episode that knows both characters very well, has a terrible relationship, both characters very well, and that's Mastermind. Mastermind was one of the first members of the Brotherhood, who was abandoned by Magneto when he did his Magneto shit and decided he didn't need the Brotherhood anymore. And Mastermind did not get along with Pietro because Mastermind was one of the many characters trying to get with Wanda. Mastermind showed that he was strong enough to coax his way and manipulate Gene Gray. Yes, he did have some power boosting from Emma Frost in the process, but still, for Gene Gray

to be like one of the greatest telepaths of all time, it still took an awful lot for illusion magic to work. And if I'm not mistaken, it also worked on Xavier. So even though he has natural defenses to, like, psychic attacks, Mastermind doesn't attack you psychically. He just alters your perception of things. So it's not really a psychic attack. There's no probing there.

He's just changing how you're receiving the world around you. So I do think if you would to introduce Mastermind as a wild card, somebody who has a grudge against both characters and someone who probably wouldn't mind to see them, you know, try to kill one another, you could possibly have a situation where Mastermind could create an illusion that would convince one of the other to react, irrationally.

I could kind of buy that. Like, if he did if he did an illusion, say, of Magneto killing Wanda, that would be sort of the inciting incident I could see would put Quicksilver into that kind of blind rage.

But, yeah, I don't know, though. Like, it would have to be a very specific way of killing him. Yes. Which maybe isn't as, which you know you need a bit more sort of

pre-planning to do rather than if he just like punched Magneto even if he did it really fast Magneto's got his force field he's got like his armor and stuff which is pretty sturdy as well like I think

Magneto could take a punch in rage from Quicksilver so I think if Quicksilver was going to kill him he'd have to pre-plan it in a way that I'm not sure he would have time do in that situation if he's just acting in a

you know a moment of blind rage if he's doing it in like what you said a crime of passion maybe not but like Quicksilver would know enough about Magneto where he could plan that ahead of time and say you know I know enough about my father or whatever the I don't know if the father is I don't know if that's common anymore it's it's I don't think it is anymore No, right, but I've spent

enough time around From the high evolutionary at this point for all we know I spent enough time around Like, you know to know That like I can give him this And I know how to approach him like this So with planning Potentially

My only argument against planning Yeah I don't think crime of passion is right way So I'll tell you my argument with crime Passion is two things One, Quicksilver is going to be faster than reaction speed And also Whiplash is not the fourth

of the blow, it's the speed of the blow. So that's what it is. It's the rebound effect. Like, that's what's going to break your neck. It's not the force. It's the snap back that will. Or, I mean, are you familiar with what a contra coup is? Excuse me?

No. So contra coup is what a lot of people who are in accidents is a brain injury. They suffer. Because it is not, it's your brain, because your brain's kind of loose in your skull. When it goes forward and back quickly, It's the reaction of the brain hitting the back of your skull or the forward of your skull from the whiplash. That's what causes the brain injury, is not the initial blow, but the momentum of your brain sloshing around inside of your skull, hitting the inside of your skull. So that's how you're going to kill Magneto?

We're in Slash? Science and speed? Physics? Yes. John? Yeah, I'm not convinced. Is that okay? Brain slash.

You're taking one of like a scientific term, contra coup and reducing it to brain slash, which I appreciate. Thank you. All right. No. Dylan? I don't buy it.

Go ahead. So, well, to get very tactical the way Corey did with very scientific. Scenario like that, I think that I should do the same thing and say that it would just make them ate too many jelly babies. That's going to kill him. Yeah, like loads of jelly babies. Is Magneto allergic to jelly babies?

Have you ever eaten too many jelly babies? Is there such a thing? Right. We don't know what the limit of too many jelly babies is. So what if we just like held Magneto down and just kept feeding him jelly babies to the point where he was like, I've had too many jelly babies? and he just dies from like jelly babies well I think you struggled

just to hold him down though what's the fucking leather strap right there's no magnets and that yeah but there's metal around him probably that he can use to free himself I would make a wooden chair and then leather strap him to the chair

his limitless magnetic powers means he would reach out far and wide for something like that I'm just making them eat jelly babies Loads and loads of jelly babies Like seven, eight packs of jelly babies I thought you're going to say seven or eight I wait I think I misunderstood how big a jelly baby

Is it the size of an actual baby Regular ass fucking jelly Do you what jelly baby is? I know what they are I know what they are I think we refer to them as sour patch kids Like we have we have like that's our version of it That's stupid

They're jelly babies That's fair. It just loads of jelly babies, right? Because, you know, John, if you have, like, one pack of jelly babies, like, that's enough jelly babies, right? Mm-hmm. You had, like, two packs of jelly babies. You're like, oh, that's too many jelly babies. If you had, like, eight packs of jelly babies, you're like, I'm going to die.

I've had too many jelly babies. I mean, have there been any recorded cases of people dying from eating too many jelly babies? No, because nobody's eating that many jelly babies. Well, there you go. I'm going to say a big no to this one. The science doesn't back it up. I'm sorry. That's because it has never happened.

It could happen. If you kill someone with some jelly babies, come back to me and I'll change my mind. Okay, so this counts. Like, if I do kill somebody, you can't use this as evidence in court. in court. This is like, John told me to do this, so it's okay.

We did it for the science. Yes. Just to prove a point. Yeah. So if you really... All right, Corey. So if you think about it, there are quite a few, like,

there's a, I don't know if it was from a what if comic, but it's a very famous few panels. She's seen it online all the time. Basically, it is a story where the Sandman, finally fucking has enough of it and shoves himself in his all-sandy form into Peter Parker's body, forcing his body to expand before exploding outward. That seems like that should do the trick on pretty much everyone for the most part, right?

Yeah, I guess. So I guess that's the kind of thing of just like, there are certain little things like that. You know, I'll kind of bundle some of these up together because you have that one. I mean, Kitty pride fusing things into people's bodies when she's in her kind of phasing ability where she can just grab people and phase them with her. Have you gotten to, how far along are you into your X-Men read right now? Are you into the Hellfire Gala where everything, you know, goes, goes off? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I've just read that and I'm just, I'm finally in the like the last sort of bit.

of the Crocoen age. Okay. So, you've seen this scene... So Kitty's basically just turned... Oh, go ahead. Oh, by all means. I was going to say, Kitty's basically become Shadowcat again,

where she's like a ninja going around, killing people, and doing all that kind of jazz. Yeah. So you saw the scene where she, the Crocoa portal put her out, and she was surrounded by, like, 12 dudes, and she just systematically killed all of them. A lot of them being phasing parts into them,

into one another. If you were to do that to Magneto, because he controls the magnetism, he controls metal and magnetism, like let's say, because one of those things she did was like, some guy pointed a gun, and she fused that guy's gun

in through his own skull. This is more of a what if, because now I'm just genuinely curious. Does Magneto have enough control over metal that that wouldn't affect him? Because, like, he can break things down. We've seen him, like, disassemble things using his powers,

but could he disassemble it to such a degree that it becomes the pure particles and then he could just effortlessly pull them out without causing any sort of internal disruptions? I'm going to say that that is maybe the best argument.

The idea that like Kili Pry could like put a gun inside Magneto's head because of her powers but Magnino because of his powers would he be able to disqualify assemble that gun and like take it out of his head before it's done like like irrepressible damage to him that's maybe better than the simplest argument that's i don't know though i i kind of think that that he's got the powers that oh on magnino's dick right now like you're not that we're doing

that's why John's the perfect judge it's correct he's got this ability to affect stuff at like basically a subatomic level so if he really wanted to I think maybe he probably could like you know

survive something like that like he even survived having his heart ripped out of his chest and managing to like keep his own blood pumping himself using his powers for like another hour or so after that happened. So I think the only thing that makes me question it is like his brain, if it's his brain where the gun is getting jammed into, that might be a different story because obviously, you know, if the reaction thing again.

Mind isn't there to be able to do it, then how is he going to, you know, know, know to use his powers? and the way that would save him. So I think this is a pretty good one. This could potentially be the death of Magneto if you were able to convince Kitty Pride to do it in the first place. Yeah. Okay. Corey notoriously loves Kitty Pride.

Yeah. Smooth it over, don't worry. You've said that multiple times. Corey loves... I certainly wasn't rolling my eyes when John mentioned him pulling the giant space bullet out of space. favorite character of the X-Man yeah love her to death

any pride yeah okay so well that's pretty good what about if we just have the flash use the speed force

it just killed Magneto because we all know historically that the speed force is invincible and amazing so we just have the flash just like fucking kill Magneto done

it's just a speed force yep He could pull Magneto into the Speed Force. Not the Univorce because we have seen interplay between Marvel and DC before. That's going to get again. Correct. So it's entirely possible that Magneto and the Flash could intertwine. And then the Flash just uses the Speed Force and then kills Magneto.

High? Speed Force. That's high. What does that mean? worry about it, it's the speed force. I mean, people get lost in the speed force, you know? Like, you break down into pure

energy and you get lost. People die in the speed forest. For example, Magneto. Can I, just kind of piggyback on that? I mean, on Prince's court alone, you've lost me when you said the speed force. So, in that...

But I did lose you, though, is we've already established in this show that the Flash and the Speed Force are so invincible but if fucking nobody can kill him except for whatever the fuck what did we do glue in the floor what was it when we killed him with I can't remember

he trapped in the building did you put submit in his lungs or somebody we put cement in their lungs I can't remember who I was that old were I was Wolverine okay um that was bees bees in their lungs bees in their lungs

oh no that's way better well so much better so okay I was looking into this because I was thinking like, how do you reverse the polarity of magnets and like how do you interrupt with how do you interrupt magnets? How do you, how does magnetos powers work? And the thing that I kept seeing is that the argument was being made that Magneto has control over all of the different metals that are in like on the earth.

atmosphere. And there are sometimes where things have happened with like space things where he's not been able to have the same level of manipulation until he finds like a trace element of what he's looking for. One of those arguments I did see was like if a character from DC Comics, for example, were to interact with Magneto, like if you were to say Darkside, because Darkside is a new god and the new gods, their technology is so vastly different than anything else that's on Earth, Darkside could theoretically just stomp Magneto because Magnetio's abilities would not work on the new god

apocalypse technology because of the metal alloys were going to be completely foreign and alien to him. It feels like a cop out, to be frank. Because another thing about Darkside is the Omega Beams, which he has such laser-focused control that he zigzag and shit and go around corners. Like, he could just pester Magneto with that shit

all day until eventually fatigue sets in and then he hits him with him and then that's it. But the thing I want to go to is the idea, because you mentioned that Magneto is able to go up in space and does not need oxygen while he's there because of force field, right? So how long can Magneto go without breathing oxygen? Because he has a force field, yes, but there's only a finite amount of air in said force field. because you can't... Well, I guess it's enough for him to, like, transfer from outside the Earth's atmosphere to asteroid M. So, depending on how far away that is, I'd say, yeah.

Because I was looking up, again, if I was going to try to do a character from a different universe, I was thinking Plastic Man. Plastic Man, or Elo Brian, he is incredibly durable. He's essentially immortal because he's been decapitated, blown up, melted, and shit. and he just pops back together. No issues there. Metal really wouldn't impact him because you can't penetrate his body

because rubbery. So my question is, would Mr. Fantastic work in the same way? Let's say that Mr. Fantastic were to wrap himself, envelope himself around Magneto. Could he wait out Magneto to suffocate? That's a good idea. That's a really good idea.

That seems like it could be both. of all I don't know I reckon he could definitely deprive him of oxygen if he could you know keep himself wrapped around Magneto for long enough but it's just the question of you know would Magneto find a way to pry him free somehow and I think he probably would yeah like you know he's a genius level intellect but so is Reed Richards you know he's the smartest man on earth no yeah well he's i don't think he is he's he second

isn't dr doom the most intelligent man no i can't remember who it is i can't remember i thought he was moon girl who was i don't think he's read bichardt anymore i think you're right i think it is moon girl i think he's definitely i think he's in the top three yeah moon girl is smarter than dr doom

yeah canonically they have established that moon girl is the smartest character in marvel Oh, is Miss Marvel going to be the next smartest character Because you have to wreck her and everything She's been inhuman She's been a mutant She's been a champion She's been everything

Smartest character She's one of the X-Men, she's Spider-Man She's Spider-Man Yeah, I saw that with her new powers She can create light constructs And make herself big So she's got like a double power Well yeah, she's got

She's got a mutant power and in human power. That might be bullshit. So, okay, let's move on to a different member of the Fantastic Four, and we'll look at Sue Storm. Sue Storm, I remember seeing panels where she would talk about she could generate a force field inside of someone and effectively, like, stop their heart. Because she doesn't, does she have to, because based of, I don't know if that was just an idle threat from Sue? or does she have to see something in order to generate the force field and is just like seeing Magneto's torso enough to do that

or does she have to see the interior of the man's body? Because you mentioned like Magneto had his heart removed and was able to keep his blood going for an hour. So like if she had basically put a force field inside of his heart triggering like a heart attack because of the arteries being blocked, like I don't know well I think

potentially yeah she's got the power to do that for sure but I don't know if Sue would have the will to do that which is like I think she's not the kind of person who would go around killing someone so

you'd have to find a good reason for her to do it in the first place but then Magneto's basically got the same ability as well where he could use his control of like the iron in the bloodstream to kind of cause her heart to stop if you really wanted to so I reckon that would end in a bit of a Mexican standoff where they're both doing it to each other

yeah yeah Dylan do you have any others yeah uh ants okay what about them it's like loads of ants you know I was thinking what they're doing yeah I have something piggyback on that

loads of fucking ants they just eat them loads of ants what it's ants when the ants eat people well look if a big swarm of ants

like just they took over him what if there was a man whose mutant power was he can control ants and he said I can take all the ants and I'm going to make them get this magneto guy and then they just eat all of his skin and shit. Can I, I'm going to posit something to you, Dylan, because I feel like we're on to something and we're going to create a conflict of interest to John. But for the record, all I wrote down on my list is ants. All right.

All I wrote. So this is where I feel like we're going to start a conflict of interest for John. Because I'm going to see your ants. I'm going to raise you bees. who's someone that can control bees and would make someone eat someone and also a Nazi Corey

that's on my list and that was my big ending point I'm going to end with having swarm kill Magnino because Magneto would not be able to control bees but swarm can and what is Magneto hit

one bees, B Nazis so a swarm would just annihilate at Magneto and I think I'm glad that we're on the same page here that we both wrote down it's swarm

because also historically John is a big fan of A Magneto and B swarm so we're on the same page collectively where we're like what is Magneto's biggest

weakness fucking swarm just a load of bees commanded by a Nazi and this Nazi is like fuck this fucking Jewish guy. I'm going to sting him with all my bees.

And then that's how we killed. That was literally, like, the last thing I wrote was swarm attacks. It's the ultimate humiliation. For Magneto. To get killed by bees and the Nazi, like,

it couldn't get any worse than that. So, I think we should share this one. Sure. because we both did the same idea, right? I would agree. We were both like,

Swirp is the ultimate bad guy for Magneto because how he could swarm possibly command B's? He can't. How can he stop Nazism? Obviously he can't because Jesus Christ. Unfortunately, it seems like nobody can stop it. Nobody can stop it. So long as you're a blonde American man,

you're going to be okay. So, it seems like the best way to combat Magneto, stinging with a bunch of fucking Nazi bees. So, John, what are your thoughts on Swarm versus Magneto? I think Magneto would probably one uses force to stop any bees from coming anywhere near him. And two, probably like,

build like uses the powers to I don't know put the bees all in like a big era of metal and just crush them all or something I don't think that he would kill swarm like that I don't agree with this

I John I know that in your heart you realize that me and Corey both figured out your one weakness and that we've got this correct and that swarm 100% beat Magneto and the problem is Swarm is always

play as like a joke character to Spider-Man but we all have realized that Swarm is the ultimate villain against a Magneto and in your heart of heart you don't want to admit it but it's true but you know this

Swam was so good how come he isn't killing all the other heroes and stuff in the Marvel universe that's what I'm saying they don't use him right but if they did use him right He would just sting everybody and fucking put bees in people's lungs. Right?

Wouldn't he? Yeah. I mean, it seems like it would be the feasible thing to do. Bees in the lungs. How do you kill Wolverine? Bees in the lungs. How do you kill Magneto? Bees in the lungs.

Is this just what all these episodes are going to become now? Just warm. Just this one specifically. And Wolverine one. Part of it is because. because he's a Nazi as well, is that, like, you know,

historically didn't like the Nazis. As most people don't. That's part of it, like the indignity that he would die to, like, bees and Nazi. Like, that's got a sting on.

Um, so. That, that was a bit you'd like. Well, I have loads more. You have loads more? Do you want a rapid fire off?

Yes. Okay. By all means. Go ahead. Go ahead. A quick fire. John, you'll tell me how you killed in a second. So, ants, we didn't like, we didn't like ants.

We'rewolf attack. Who's the werewolf? Nope. Is it a man wolf? It doesn't matter. Just a werewolf. Warwolf by night. It doesn't matter.

John Jameson, it doesn't matter. It's a werewolf. How is he going to stop a werewolf? You can't. The werewolf? The world made a metal? No. I mean, they didn't stop many times over the years, but you know.

How many times has a werewolf attacked Mangeto? I also want to point out that werewolves are canonically weak to silver, which is I imagine something Magneto has a degree of control over. Yeah. Does he have silver on him? Probably. No. What do you mean? Probably.

He doesn't have all the metal on him. That's bullshit. He doesn't just have metal on him. Why is it? It's costume as a made of something. He has control of metal. He doesn't have all of the metals on his fucking body. Right?

Okay, whatever. Right, let's say, let's say weir-off does it kind. Right, let's cross that out. And he didn't like swarm. Let's cross that out. Okay, so what if you give him, like, too much metal? Is this the whole jelly baby thing again? But what if you give him too much metal?

And he couldn't control at all. There's too much metal for him to control. It's too overwhelming. And you just crush him with metal. Loads of metal. Well, I think he could control it because as we've established, he's got this indomitable will

and the ability to, you know, use his power without limit. Okay. So if you didn't like that one, which you didn't. This is my gambit. All right. What if?

obviously you know that with magnets they have like an opposite force so like you have a magnet and then the opposite uh attractant thing that repels it yeah mm-hmm so magnet no magnet is like magnet so we have the opposite magnet that just like pushes magnet into the sun i mean it have to be a pretty strong magnet though where are you getting that from it doesn't matter i can find it like it's common comics. Just fucking somebody made it. And we just have the, whatever force that Magneto has, we do the opposite of it. And we just like repel him into space past Astroaad M where he can't breathe into space into like the sun. Then he's just dead.

Just whatever magnet that Magneto has, opposite. Opposite magnet. Okay. But then I'd say, He has like his, uh, his acolytes catch him when he goes flying through space. So he doesn't hit the sun. So, see? There you go.

Do you see? Yeah. Well, if you're able to create some sort of opposite magnet, then I'm going to say this. What? What acolytes does Magneto have in space right now that would stop me from making a magnet opposite to Magneto that would fire him in the space? He's got hungry. Joe

I forgot about Hungry Joe Mark it off I'm right though All of Magneto's the mycalaids They're not his acolytes anymore They all laughed him

He has no acolytes anymore He's got loads of acolytes He don't have to know about them all He used to have loads of acolytes And then he fucking fucked him over And then Favon Cortez fucked him over two and that was like 30 years ago no dude has nobody he's got nobody if somebody somebody sent magneto into the sun right now nobody would be like i gotta say that cunt

except maybe Xavier but also like Xavier should also go into the sun so I think I think I've got to with that one I agree to disagree I will say this about I agree. For somebody who is on... We agree. You get the rest of it. Oh, we're going to edit... We'll edit the part where John agrees,

and then we'll cut the rest of it out. Yeah. In the bit with John says, I agree, and they cut that. Hard cut. The other one I had written down with shark. The shark. Shark. Yeah.

Because Magneto, historically, doesn't go into the water that much, right? Mm-hmm. Very rarely. How's the shark going to get him, though? He's in the water of the shark eats him. He doesn't go in the water, though. You just establish that. But if I put him in the water, the shark eats him.

Wow. That sounds like you'd have to line up a lot of Domino's to get that situation. Hey, Magneto. You have to get Domino to do it. He'll do it because it's like Domino's going to be there in a bikini, and Magnu's like, there's one I haven't had yet. In the water he goes. We don't know that.

We don't know. he probably has but I'm like hey man there's a mutant to that point like hey there's a mutant in the water that needs help and he's like okay I'm a I'm a good guy now I guess I'll do that and he goes in they're gonna shark eats him like what what's he gonna do like magnetize the shark no he's in the water it's the shark like element the shark eats him shark I can't see magneto going in the water though I'd see him like preying in a submarine out of whatever metals nearby and sending that in to go and rescue someone rather than him go and do it himself I don't think that's so like so hang on whoa so from what I've written time I've like crossed off the ones you don't like and I've ticked the ones you like and the only one that I think

that would kill my needle is syphilis yeah everybody has a weakness we started I think that's the one I think that's the one I wouldn't say shit I mean there's some interesting ideas there but you know

Mark? It's Magneto okay so so if we were to kill Magneto I think if we were like put a bubble around it um the way to kill Magneto is probably just to give him syphilis

because he fucks around too much? Yeah. Yeah. So, put that bit on Instagram. How do you kill Magneto? Give him syphilis.

There you go. So, so John, real quick, do you have an idea in mind for how you would do the deed? Well, this is a thing. I couldn't come up with an idea for it because I

strongly believe that there's like no good way of killing Magneto. That's bullshit. I mean, Grant Morrison figured out a way. He's too good. He's too good. That wasn't Magneto. Yeah.

So I do want to say because, John, because you have not figured out a way to kill Magneto, someone else did our work for us on this one. YouTube account, the film theorists, 13 years ago, nine years ago, put out a video titled, How to Kill Me? Hill Magneto film theory. It has 30,000 comments, 9.4 million views. Maybe we should have consult... What?

What? Maybe we should have consulted this before. 9 million! Yep, yep, yep. Yep. Yep. Yep. What? What is it? It's mainly just a breakdown of how Magneto in the movie's powers worked. So that's why I'm going to say, like, Magneto in the movies is significantly weak.

than Magneto in the comics. Because Magneto, the movies, hasn't terraformed a whole fucking planet. He hasn't established an asteroid on the moon. He's just been some asshole who's been trying to kill like senators and presidents and shit and not succeeded. So he could be killed by sharks.

He could be killed by sharks. If that video got nine million, how many is this video going to get? I really feel like the syphilis argument's going to do us a lot of favors. Okay. So, I hope so. All right.

Well, so, uh, John, now that you have successfully defended Magneto from certain death, aside from venereal disease. Wait, so, for me, can we get definitively, can we just say, John, the way we killed Magneto is syphilis? Or is, are you happy enough? Yes. That's the only way to kill him? Yeah, yeah. 100%.

That's it. 100%. Mm-hmm. way to kill Magneto is to fuck him. Yeah. Well, when the man's right, he's right. So, John, now that we have definitively found a way to kill Magneto, how many movies have you been watching? I am now up to 728 for the year.

It's a good bit. What was the last one you watched? What was the last one? It was called Winda River. What? It's called Winda River. It starred, Ernie Reiner and Elizabeth Olson. It was like sort of a murder mystery in, like, a snowy,

like sort of Native American town. And, yeah, it was good. Very, very good. very big how many stars give it four stars out of seven out of five

makes more sense yeah there you go so john where can they read your full review on this movie wind river if they go to letterbox and search for at big john balski form word

then they'll be able to find it there there is a link in the description below for that as well Dylan what are you up to these days I'm doing a lot of killing you've done that before but day what's not a joke I know I'm just saying

it's your second admission people are going to stop believing it's a joke if you keep doing it not a joke anyway so Maybe I should do. What will be a different bit for me to do? I've done a lot of like prayer circles recently.

There you go. More like I had like a prayer circle and we just pray to like a non-existent God. I just meet up on the day. And then people just believe it. And then I just let them go home and believe that whatever God I meet up is true. But other than that, sometimes on Monday night, from 9 o'clock to 11 o'clock, I do everything. radio show on Bount Digital Radio. I assume the link will be in the description somewhere

up or down somewhere where we play like loads like David Bowie sometimes if it's not controversial and Pearl Jam and Cat Power, Donald Lerray. And then other than that, sometimes I will stream on Twitch at Spooky LaRue. It's my Twitch name. I stream there whenever bring it a chance to stream. I haven't done one in a while, but check it out if you want to see me draw pictures of the Joker. Or sometimes we do like the thumbnails of our show for the SparkVanger's. So that's the fun thing to check out. So the thumbnail for this episode will be Magneto walking out of a

health clinic by the sound of it then. The thumbnail of this will be John's fucking Magneto. All right. Well, my My only thing I have to pitch for myself is I have Large Old Cup, which is a spoken word podcast where I talk and tell stories. The last episode I recorded, which at this point was a month ago here, was talking about musician Tim Barry and how on the day I was supposed to see him. I watched a man drive his car into the building I worked in and almost killed a man. So it was a really wild day. What?

Yep. You should listen to that episode, Dylan. Anyway, the other thing that we have is we are on social media, various platforms, TikTok, Tumblr, Instagram, Twitter, Blue Sky, Threads, even. I'm not even sure what Threads is, but we're there, baby. And basically, our presence on there is going to be to help promote the show, as well as give you short little soundclips for things that we thought were funny that happened in them. So, you know, like, subscribe, follow, check us out there. by all means check out the YouTube, Spotify, and our show is on every other podcast platform imaginable.

Trust me, I spit 45 minutes linking us to pretty much everything that we can be linked to. Nice. Aside from that, though, any closing thoughts? Fuck my Nito. Is he only would have killed Mike Nino? There you go. All right, everybody will see you soon.

Goodbye. Bye-bye. There it is. That's how you know when to stop recording.