The Snark Tank - #06: Onision Bad

Episode Date: January 23, 2020

Will Onision survive the wrath of Chris Hansen? Will crying kids on Xbox Live ever NOT be nostalgic? Is bullying good? Will the mysticism of the N word ever dissipate? Can normal sized people have little people kids? Did furries ruin werewolves? Will Chris and and Derrick ever get over their undying lust for Jennette McCurdy? A fever dream of an episode awaits you. Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

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Toss that Washington over yonder. You won't be disappointed. To learn more, go to patreon.com slash the snarktank. Hey, look, if it's a little dead mean. Hey, everybody, welcome to the Snark Tank podcast. With me, your host, Chris Raygun, and it's me, Tom Sweeney, here again to talk to you about stuff. And it's here, some black guy coming at you live. You almost died there.

Yeah, you got to chill out, some black man. I have a lot of respect for radio people who do that stuff. Because it's not easy to put on an entertaining voice for that long. Yeah, trust me. I can't even do it for a few minutes. Yeah. I like the old school radio people, the ones that were like, Hey, name is he.

You know, like, what the hell? What was that? Midnight Magnus. We're going to be talking about the green hornet and the green lantern tune in. I love those voices, man. They're so cool. Will the green hornet make it out alive? Tune in next time.

It's weird voice. I think they, I don't even think they had different voices or inflections. I think it's literally about the way they recorded it. Because they don't even really like, there's no excuse for sounding like that. That is sounds entertaining, though. Like, it sounds like a loring. No, no, but even on the news, like, they would be like, eh, it was today. A man fell off the street and died.

He fell off the street. This man fell off, man fell off a two-story building and laid on his head, but somehow is still intact. Talk to you later at 6 p.m. Good night. That was more of the, like, 90s. That was more of the 90s. That was family guy, like the, the, the Tricia Takenow. That's it.

That's it. That's it. Yeah. couldn't do it. Yeah, and like, but like in the 60s, it was like, and it's like, there's no way sharp and high. Oh, the humanity, that classic oh the humanity clip. Oh, the humanity.

And it's like, there's no way that guy sounded like that. That's an adult man in the 50s. Yeah. There's no way. I just don't believe that. Or like all of those. A grown man in the 50s who sounded like that would have gotten beaten to death. Yeah, you'd be like, dude, you're a man child and you need to be slapped up.

Ben Shapiro would not survive in the 50s. Oh, no way. God. Let's say hypothetically. I'm gonna be real. It's more, honestly, his voice bothers me more than him himself. Yeah, I would agree. He's just annoying. Every time he says something, I was like, oh my God, shut up.

Yeah, I can't disagree with that. He'll say something every once in a blue moon that I think makes a little bit of sense. And even then, I'll still be like, I wish you weren't the, I wish you didn't say that. You didn't say that. Because he just, I don't know. It really is just the voice. Which I guess like I can't really complain about because I guess I have like a little bit of a kind of of of that voice going on. I don't, I don't cringe when I hear you talk, you know?

I guess so. I don't know. I don't want to set you on fire, but like that's like nothing to do with your voice. Anyway, so this is apparently a podcast. I kind of forgot to introduce it really properly. We are, so basically, for those of you knew, we're going to be doing this every week. If you're listening to this on Monday, that means you are a support. and you pay a dollar.

And if you're listening to this on Thursday, like the rest of you, then you're listening to it for free. No pressure or anything, but a dollar helps a ton, and you get to write into the show for like $5. It's a nice little operation we got going on. Yeah.

We're going to control the world one day. Slowly but surely, we're going to become the strongest podcast on this fucking planet. Mark our fucking words. I'll be back, and when I come back, I'm going to find you, I'm going to take you somewhere real fucking dark,

all right? She's a little fucking dark. You're not going to know what the fuck you are, right? But you're going to be safe. I like how it ended kind of nicely, though, too. Like, it seems like very dire, but you say, you're going to be safe. I like that.

So we got a couple of questions from our lovely supporters over on Patreon.com slash the snark tank. Yeah, remember that. Branding. Please. The first question that caught my eye was this one by, I think this guy's name is Russian-ish.

And his question is, What do you think Helen Keller's orgasms sounded like? Oh, man. Oh, man. I'll go. I'll do it. No, I don't want to hear this. I'll do it.

You guys, I'll jump in. Derek, you down? You want to try this? I want to give it a voice audition. Go for it. I mean, let's be real. It's just, I, oh, man, that's awful. Probably, like, a lot of muffled M sounds with a few Bs than like a large.

at the end. I feel like it's just a lot of fabric moving around. She can make sounds. You can speak, but she can make sounds. Could she? I don't know anything about Helen Keller. I just know that she was blind,

deaf and dumb. I think she has the like the cadence of, and like the intelligence of a mumble rapper. Like I think like there's a little bit of a crossover. So, you know, you listen. You hear some of those songs, right?

Like, I'm like, I was a good. I got money in my bank. That's pretty, that's so shockingly accurate. I can literally be a mumbo rap. I would refuse to because I respect the art of rap too much. I feel like that was as good as you're going to get as far as a Helen Keller orgasm. No, I could, I could really, I know I could do it. That's the obscenely good at me changing my voice.

Give us the Helen Keller big oh. Okay. Let me think about this a little bit. It has to be in depth. I'm already angry. Holy shit. That came from a real place. That somehow offended me.

I'm pretty method in my acting skill. If anybody wants to hit me up and anybody needs an orgasm sound on some voice acting clips. So let me know. There's a lot of questions. I figure we'll parse through them, you know, throughout the episode, sprinkle them in. Okay. Like a nice little, like, you know, like sprinkles on a little break. I like that.

I like that. Exactly. Like a nice little interlude to the stuff that we're normally talking about. We don't really have a topic to really go through this time because things are just kind of weird right now. And it seems like there's a lot of focus everywhere. I know there's a lot of people talking about the Onisian stuff. I haven't really looked into that really at all. All I know is that Onisian is a piece of shit.

But that's like not surprising to anybody who even knows anything remotely about him. How is he still relevant? Didn't he do like... Oh, he's extremely relevant right now. I don't get it. Like he's not like a good amount of subscribers too. Does he? I think so.

He's definitely got over a million. I know that for sure. Didn't he change it so people in order to subscribe to his channel, they had to pay money? I'm pretty sure he did that. That's a thing? Yeah. Yeah. I didn't know you can do that.

It's definitely not ideal. Right? Because you lose like pretty much everybody. Yeah. Oh shit. I, like maybe. I didn't know. All I know that, there's only two things.

I know that he was claiming everybody's videos that made videos about him or mentioning him to try to siphon all the money. Yeah. And then I know he recently had Chris Hansen come to his door. Like that happened where Chris Hansen actually went to his door to confront him

and then he got the police called on him. Can you imagine you're just in your living room and you hear a knock at the door and it's fucking Chris Hanson? Can he come to one of his lines? Hey, Chris Hansen. Nice weather happened, huh?

Can you, uh... You want to take a seat? He's outside. You want to take a seat? You want to take a seat? It's weird. So there's a 9-11, and we don't even really talk about this, but I know I heard a little bit of the 9-11 call. Like, there was the dispatch.

What do you say that? 9-11 call? Yeah. 9-1. 9-1. What do you say 9-11? Wait, it's the same fucking thing. 9-11 is the fucking buildings in the city I lived in the same sequence of numbers.

But 9-1-1 is 9-1-9-1. 9-11 is a date. 9-11 will fucking... It's a date. save you time. Oh my God, call 9-11. Like what? Call the freaking...

It's literally less syllables. Let's say 911. 9-11 rolls off your tongue. 9-1-1 are hard syllables. Hard syllables. Yes. Derek can... Just like there's a hard R and there's a...

There's a hard R than there's a soft R. Remember the hard A? The hard A. Hard R and soft A, okay? There's a difference. I just think it's fascinating. I've never heard anybody... further than 911 is 9-11. Ever in my life. I probably don't say that either. They just came out

wrong. I probably don't say that myself. Yeah, yeah. There was a 911 call that he made and it's record. How did they get the recording of that? Um, I guess for some reason, people are always able to get dispatch calls. I don't know how they do it. I think you just request it or something. That's insane. Yeah. For some reason, power. Everything like when, when that swatter, the accidentally got that, well, not accidentally got that dude killed or whatever, you know, and that happened, people got that call immediately. And they got to hear what was over the whatever game they were playing, I think, Hall of Duty.

So the thing, they got the call for Anisian, and I did hear it was kind of funny, like, describing who it was and then, oh, it's Chris Hansen. And it just sounds so absurd. It sounds like a comedy sketch, like the way it ends, like, exactly where you think it should. Yeah. It feels like it's written. It's like, who's the person at the door? It's Chris Hanson.

It's Chris Hanson. Oh, he's harassing me. Yeah, like, the odds of Chris Hanson is in your, in your driveway. Those aren't. Why did Chris Hanson? Well, did he have Chris Hansen come up there himself? Or did Chris Hansen actually show up based on his duties as being Chris Hansen?

He showed up there based on his duties. He was like, hey, the interesting thing is I know Chris said that he talked to his lawyers. He consulted his lawyers. Everything he did, he wouldn't get in trouble for it. So it kind of makes me believe that there was some prior contact or something. And there has to be something. If he, because you don't just show up to people's doorstep typically, but at the same time there are journalists and reporters that do do that shit.

So obviously they're probably within the right, kind of like a Jehovah's Witness, you can come into your door, but you have the right to tell him to piss off, right? Yeah, yeah. Yeah, I can't feel you. I don't know. I don't know anything that Ornizian's done, really. I know that he has, like, weird.

The only thing that I know is that, like, he has like a relationship. So he's this YouTuber. He's been around for a long-ass time for anybody who doesn't know somehow. A long-ass time, like 10, 12, 15 years probably. I feel like he's been around forever. and he's been hated since the dawn of his channel existence. Yeah. I think.

I don't think there was ever a point in time where Anisian was like a content creator that people admired, really, or that was like in favorable view to the public. I don't think that's ever been the case for him. He's really that guy, huh? Yeah. He's the guy that his fan base is pretty much 14-year-old girls. Yeah. The only people that are, you know, they're stupid enough to watch shit like that.

Yeah, they are the bottom. Yeah. And apologies to any 14-year-old girls who might be listening. If you are here, you're on the right track to living a pretty decent life. At the very least, you're on a wrong track that's a lot less wrong. Yeah, agreed. Yeah, we're not great, but like, he's not good. No, we're not Onisi.

Like, Onizian's like a whole other level. We're great compared to him. Like, we're fucking gods, all right? Compared to Onesion. We're saints. Yeah, there we go. Sparkling Spectres. I think the general...

What the fuck is that? I don't care. I think the general idea for him. is like, I guess he has these, like, relationships where he has, like, these thirds that he brings in. But the thirds are always, like, younger. And, like, they, I think one of the people that he was in a relationship, he had legal guardianship over of. Yes. Yes.

There's some crazy shit. I haven't really looked that into it. So take all this with a pinch of salt. Yeah. There's, like, a million videos on Onesion on YouTube right now that I don't even know where to begin. So I've just, like, I've just thrown, like, I'm done. I just don't care. I'm washing my hands of it.

There's too much. There's too much. There's too much. much. That one guy that, uh, uh, Reps, on, you know, uh, Daniel, right? Oh, yeah, he's been involved. He's, he's, he's in the crossfires. And this is one of the reasons why he's getting a pass for making so many on videos. Yeah. Because he's directly involved. No, he makes sense. So otherwise, because I, I heard, uh, I was watching one of those news channels. It might have been scarce because like, oh shit, scarce is back. And then, um, Scarces has been gone for a while. Yeah. And he'll, he'll, he'll come back and,

and, like, pop up every once in a while. And he came, he was actually talking about, that and he said that I don't know I was watching something where somebody said uh uh rep Scott has made over 50 videos and I was like how is there that much content about this guy he's like what what the what is he doing and I do know what you did you what you said is correct I know there was a girl that lived with Anisian and Anisian's

boyfriend girlfriend I don't know because the person changed the genders of some shit so I don't know what to I don't really know I don't really know enough of what it all I know is that there's allegations of grooming and some other dark shit. It gets crazy. Roaming?

Yeah. That's why Chris Hanson is at his door. Chris Hansen doesn't show up at, like, Chris Hansen isn't going to show up at Keem Star's door because Keemstar is an asshole. Like, it's just not, he's like,

I'm Chris Hanson. I've heard you're kind of a dick. Like, that's not going to be the circumstance. He's like a fucking herald of like bad times. If he shows up, that means you've like, you've done some shit.

Chris Hansen is a herald. He's an omen. He shows up and you know things are going sound. When Chris Hansen shows up, you know the police are not very far behind him, no matter the context when they're coming. That is such a haunting way to describe Chris Hansen. Real talk. And it's actually kind of weird, though, that I guess I don't know if something's going to happen

afterwards, but nothing has happened yet. And you think that when Chris Hansen gets involved, it's some serious shit. And supposedly, he's been involved for a few months, at least. Because I've seen back in, I mean, like I said, a ton of. of videos. I made a video on my second channel saying, because I don't give a fuck about talking about Onesion, because there's people that kept asking, like, constantly, are you going to weigh in on this? And I just, like, my second channel, I have a fucking Spider-Man mask on. And I just do stupid shit. I just fuck around. And so I just said, like, dude, I don't, I don't want,

I'm not talking about them for these reasons. Like, leave me alone, please. Yeah. I have the same people who are like, are you going to make a video on Onesian? It's like, maybe, I don't know. Because I can't find a concise video or a concise piece. of information that, you know, is easy to research. It's all just like, there's so many videos on it. And I'm not going to sit through 50 hours of video content just to get a vague idea of what happened with this guy that I don't even care about.

Yeah. You know? His backstory's so fucking clouded. It's like fucking Dracula or some shit. You just can't really figure out, like, who or what he is or what he's done. So you're just like, we have to let him be for now. We can't, we can't act yet. We don't have enough information on him.

Yeah. I think Enizion is try to bait me into talking about him a couple of times. Oh, really? Yeah, only because this was a while ago, though. This was a while ago where I think he was really trying to get some of that clout from all the shit that was kind of booming that came off of like GamerGate and all of that shit. So then there would be a couple of videos. I know at least two times he was like watching clips of my videos and reacting to it or something. And I think he was trying to hope me, hoping that I would respond.

But even since I just wasn't, he's not interesting enough to me because he's too easy. Like, he's one of those jokes that, like, you can't even just press play and then that's the content. Like, you don't need to say anything. What do you need to say about Onizion? Everything he does is a, it's a joke. It's stupid. It speaks for itself. It really does.

In most circumstances. Like, I had a good laugh because he went fucking nuts about when his Patreon got deleted. Yeah. That was fake. That was fake reactions. But there's no reason to make a video about that because he's putting on a show. Like, that's all you do is watch that. Watch that video.

I don't need to react to it. The thing is, it's like, I, I'm aware that this is going to sound bad when I say it. Okay. But I don't really care that much. I adore when we get to a point where there's a person in society or on the internet or whatever that everybody agrees unanimously. Yes, bully this person. I love that. I agree.

I love it because I think everybody wants to bully someone. I think that's true. We all want to what we don't like. I don't think that nobody on this planet feels like they want to. want to just like, oh, kumbaya, everybody, oh, love everyone. No, bullshit. That's why the planet is the way it is. Oh, yeah.

No, there are certain people. Now, go ahead. You got, you got a thought. So, like, when people like Caitlin Bennett, for example, the gun girl, the Kent State gun girl. Oh, I didn't know. That was her name. She's been going around interviewing people and just getting completely owned by everybody that she interviews.

She keeps going around asking people like, do you think it's okay for people, for the school to put, what is it, tampons in the men's? bathroom for men that have periods. And everybody around her is just like, yeah, whatever, I don't care. Why would I give a fuck about that? Yeah, it's like, yeah, okay, yeah, good, yeah. That's exactly everybody's reaction.

Like, why would that, how would that affect me in any way, shape, or four? I wouldn't, like, I would be like, oh, that's, okay? You know, I'd go and I'd piss and I'd leave. What if I have a fucking young daughter that has recently, you know, started her fucking shit, and I can go in my bathroom and get a fucking tampon for her. Yeah, just seems like that might be fantastic on this. It just seems fine. Well, there's none in the girls' bathroom, grab something from the men's bathroom.

The whole thing, I don't even know why this is, I think it's a sign of how strange things are right now that something as simple as neutral bathrooms are political. Because like every bathroom in your house, in your apartment, probably, you know, like, those are neutral bathrooms. And those are the best bathrooms. Yes. And like there's no reason, I don't know, like I get it, I guess. I, in a sense of like, oh, things have been this way for a long time out. why change it. But at the same time, it's like...

This could be better. So change it. What's the... I don't know. I just don't see the issue. Well, see, that's the thing that's been tripping me out the entire time because I would see people trip out about all-gendered restrooms. Like, there's signs now that says like all-gendered.

What I don't understand about that is since I've been going to the mall, there are unisex. It would say unisex. It's the same. It's literally the same thing. Just semantics. They change the fun. fucking wording. That's it. Unisex. All sexes can go in this fucking bathroom. Yeah, people were fine with unisex. Nobody had a problem with you.

But then when it says all gender, all of a sudden people like, what is this? I'm like, dude, it's the same thing. Just a different name. The whole gender thing, man. It's like so far. I'm like, it's so obnoxious now. Like, just, just give up, all right? Just let people do it. I just don't care anymore. Yeah, I think most people are just, I still stop caring about it. I think most sane people are at a point where they're just like, look, I don't give a shit. I was confused that first because. So was I. It was like. It was like. It was like the whole thing, like the whole sex versus gender thing. And then like I clarified and it was like, oh, there's sexes and then there's genders. That's what happened to me.

Whatever the fuck they want. But then they're sexes. Some people are born sexes. Then you can be a transsexual and change your sex or you can be, I think you can have both sexual organs. Yeah. That's that's called intersex now. But that's one thing and there's another gender thing. And the gender thing is kind of like whatever.

The gender thing is, I don't know anything about this shit. It's very, it's very simple to break down. And this is where I got confusing because there was like a video like three years ago that I made. And I remember saying something like, there's that tagline. There's only two genders. This was before I really understood the difference between sex and gender. And so when I learned, okay, sex, male, female, that's it. Sex is biological.

Gender is fucking huge spectrum. I understand that completely now. And I see it in the same way I see religion. Like there is a bunch of religions. There's a bunch of genders. I think it's all stupid, but you can believe whatever the fuck you want to believe. Exactly. That's a really good way of putting it, actually.

Yeah. That's basically how I, so when I started thinking about it, and I realized, like, I'm not really, there were some things I was definitely ignorant about, and then once I learned about it, I'm like, oh, okay, and then I don't get a fuck about it. It's that simple. Wow, if only everyone could think like that,

and just learn things correctly and figure out how they feel about it internally. Well, see, the fuck of the thing. There's a lot of people. And not tell anybody about it. Just shut the fuck up. I don't care. what you feel or think.

I appreciate people being real about shit, man. Instead of just being like, you know there's people I'm talking about. They just, just, then, oh yeah, plenty of people just go along with like whatever the hell.

Like that fucking, that, that, that, that, well, actually, that's not a good example.

No, she's genuinely dumb. But, well, yeah, circling back to her, holy shit, I do genuinely believe that she is,

she is, I mean, how do I say this nicely? You don't have to. She's, she's, she's, she's,

One of the most functioning retard that I've ever seen in my life. High functioning, like in the stratosphere and shit. Definitely, like she, she functions. She's not considered, I guess, disabled, mentally disabled, but she is. It's how could you put those videos out? I don't understand people. She looks dumb in them. Like, that's the thing.

It's like, if I went out and did that, I would look at that footage and I'd be like, I look dumb in this. Yeah, there's no way I'm not going to put this out. There's a video of her just looking stupid and being proven to be. stupid constantly. Yeah. And then she put, I don't know what was the point. I guess she's doing it just to like,

I mean, she's doing for attention, obviously. Yeah. But, but I, I don't know. Like,

I feel completely fine bullying that person. And that's what the whole point of this was. Yes. Bullying is kind of nice. It kind of is. It sometimes it, it works.

Listen, man. It feels good to put people down sometimes. It's like, it's like fucked up to say because I feel like a fucking demon when I say it. You shouldn't do it, but there are,

exceptions to every rule. But dude, man, we were like, for the last couple, like, I think week or so. Yeah. We've been on this kick where we've just been watching videos on YouTube of people just being super heartless to kids on Xbox Live. And it's horrible. It's nostalgia, though. It is nostalgic a little bit.

But it's also like it's terrible. It's like, oh, man, they're just these adults or like, you know, teenagers are just being complete shitheads to this kid. But at the same time, a crying kid on Xbox Live is one of the funniest things that you'll ever hear. Because it's just, I think it's because you see yourself in it. You remember what it was like to take things that personally. Yeah. I remember being a kid.

Yes, that's a good point, dude. Yeah. So it's like cathartic. It's like you're laughing at yourself, but not really. You're laughing at this poor child. He's nothing wrong to you. He's not so for your old memory. That's pretty much all he is.

But these kids, they need this shit, man. I saw a meme recently, and it was so true to me. This guy had a car, he had all these decals on it. A bunch of nerdy-ass shit. I can't remember everything that was on it, but, like, you know, like, Naruto and all this type of stuff. Like, just way too much shit. Like, okay, I have an N-7 sticker that I put on every single car I own. That's it.

It's just going to be N-7. It looks cool. You don't know exactly what it is if you don't. It's cool. Whatever. Now, all of just putting, you know, you know those people. You see those people that have everything on their car, like everything. You're like, look, look at a few decals here and there.

It's like their car is their room. Yeah. And then so I saw a meme and then like somebody, it was a Snapchat and then they text it said, this person didn't get bullied enough. Like there's a, there's some, you need to be kind of checked. And that's what I'm saying about these Xbox kids. All these fucking kids on Xbox Live, they need to be checked because they're going to grow up being fucking really stupid. You need to learn that like you're just a dumb ass kid, dude.

Chill out. Yeah. Because they don't think that. That's the problem with kids. They're just fucking idiots. They don't know they're idiot. They don't get bullied anymore. They need to get checked.

It's like, what the hell? Like, I've often talked to children, and they're just stupid. They're just actually stupid. Yeah, well, they're stupid. But they think they're not, they really don't have any clue that they're stupid. Yeah, I knew I was a dumb kid. Because there was shit I knew that it's out there I couldn't understand or explain. And I was like, I don't know this.

I'm still do dumb shit. Because, like, I don't have time to focus on shit I don't understand. So I would do bad shit that was dumb. But, like, these kids are like, they have, like, internet. And they get, like, these half-answered internet. And they're like, oh, I know. business, like, no, you know what Wikipedia told you, you fucking imp. You don't know shit.

I don't know, man. All I know is that, like, those videos are some of my favorite videos. They're really mean and, like, they probably should not be on the site, really, but, like, I don't know, man. I mean, I guess now with the new fucking rules, right? Yeah. I don't know. I'm of two minds about it because, I don't know. Like, I don't want people to, I don't want there to be a financial incentive for people to just, like, go out and bully kids.

Because it used to be just people just, just, just. Being mean. Yeah. For just for, just for their pleasure. It's fucking fantastic. But now it's like kind of like, oh,

you could be mean to somebody and then upload it to YouTube and then like they get money for it. Okay, that's sort of fucked up. So that's like, paid money. Yeah,

the incense. Yeah, that's different. But I do think there was some kind of magic with the original Xbox Live and I don't know if it happened as much on PSN,

I assume it did. Xbox was like the hot spot for all that. Xbox Live was just a hot spot of shit that you would hear such horrible shit on Xbox Live and it would just temper you. It would just make you into this person who could

just handle shit. There's a reason why everyone in our house can say anything to each other and we'll laugh it off. Yeah. Because we were like the amount of times I was called the N-Wrude on Xbox without anyone having any, I don't particularly sound like a black man. You don't have

the, you don't have the black accent as they say. Yeah, I don't have that. But like, people would call me to N-word for no reason At all. They just feel it. They just They'd be like, dude. Wait, wait. Wait a minute. You get in that? Is that cocoa butter? You're an N-word, aren't you?

Like, they would call me, I've been called, people, some dude said things about having sex with my mom, and I'm like, you're in fucking Finland. How are you fucking my mom, dude? The meanest shit. And it's like, not looking back on it, even then it was kind of funny. Yeah. But like, now it's just hilarious. Because we went on Call of Duty for like two hours, remember?

And within that short period of time of being on Call of Duty, the newest one with our roommate. It was back. It was all back. Yeah. One of our roommates got, I think, the most recent. It's Modern Warfare, right? This is the new one? Yeah, yeah. He got Modern Warfare.

And I walked in those. This is like the day launch or like two days after it launched. I walked into his room. I was like, oh, you're playing Call of Duty? How is it? He was like, yeah, it's pretty good. And then immediately over the voice chat, I just heard the N-word. blasted

like a fucking bop like fucking team star in that famous fucking his famous rant you remember that shit that shit's nice

that shit's legendary dude I think I it was like so many N words just thrown around in a game of call duty I felt like like there were as many N words

in that match as there were Old Town Road remixes oh my god ridiculous it was a lot too fast like quick fast and a hurry

they got to get this word out on the fucking press. It's fucking ridiculous. And that's fucked because, like, I think I know, right, deep down on every level that everybody who is online saying this shit isn't really racist. No, they're not. They're just saying it to hurt somebody. Yeah, they're just saying the worst shit.

Too much power. I don't even think it's necessarily that. I think it's just you have words that you know you can't say. Absolutely. And that makes them, it's like prohibition almost. Well, that's what I'm saying. Where you see a word that you can't say. And even if somebody's not.

racist even if they have a little bit of a temper they can be like what is something that I can say that will hurt your lizard brain immediately defaults to that immediately it's so bad because that word is just even aside from the horrible history it has

that word is said and it quiets a room if you walk into a movie theater and you scream that word and you scream that word as loud as you can people are going to get up and leave that movie even though they paid for that shit Because I can't be around this energy right now.

Yeah. Because what if one person says to another person? Like, yeah. He says it too. Especially if you see it's a white guy doing it. Like, you're like, fuck. I don't, I don't want anything to do with this. This guy's dangerous.

You're immediately uncomfortable. No one's, no white man that's okay says that word out loud in public. It's, it's fun of suicide, bro. That's not afraid of the consequence. Yeah. You got to stay away from that person. They fucking give zero fucks and they're probably going to shoot somebody else. right now. They're probably baiting you into being gunned down.

Engage me. Engage. Is that kill you? That's the kind of person who would walk up to a dog on like a leash tied to a pole while their owner is inside getting coffee or something and just cut the rope for no reason. And just continue walking in public in view of everybody because he knows that it doesn't matter. What are you going to do? What are you going to do? You're going to get the dog back? You're not going to chase that dog. You're busy. You got a day. You got a job to go to go to. Oh, man. There's a lot of traffic coming. Hope that dog could dodge all those damn cars. Hope that dog's really good at Frogger. Good Lord.

Madness. What are we going to get a Frogger remaster, bro? God, damn. HD remake, Frogger? Do you imagine? No, I don't. Can you imagine? Like, I'd be pissed.

I'd be like, who the fuck? No one asks for this, and there's no, there's absolutely no reason. But what if it looked like, Grant the Fadoo and you're dodging traffic? What if the frogger came out? What if the next gen star? And the best looking game of the next generation is fucking Frogger. And it's like, wow, that frog looks real. You can see the muscles underneath its translucent skin moving with every hop.

Wow, that is a genuine Ford Focus, Model 2002. I can tell what that car is. I can tell what that car is. That's a fucking Nissan Ultima. I can see the cracks in the ground on how they slowly disrupt his speed when he hops. That's insane. Oh, wow, a little bit of wind mechanics. He can't jump as far.

I'd be like, what the fuck? I might actually, you're making it sound kind of cool. You're making a case for this game. I might actually want to play that. I don't know. I don't know if I would, I would get, I'd definitely watch you play it for a little while. And then I'd be like, this, this has to be got. I'm going to go and venture for this.

Yeah, it's usually how it works. You always see shit that other people are playing and you're like, you're just like, oh, maybe I'll play that. That was definitely how it used to be when I was a kid. I would have to see my cousins. I think my cousin was playing Halo 2 and I was like, you can fly and. shoot? What? They're not prohibiting you to only one?

Dude man, that was a big thing at the time. Like, that blew my mind. When I found out that in Halo 1, you could be playing a first-person shooter and then suddenly be playing fucking Jedi Starfighter. Like, just by going into a fucking vehicle, I was like, what? That's possible?

Excuse me? Because usually that's like, you know, there's a vehicle section of a level and then there's like, you're on point. Yeah. It's really strange. That game means a lot to me, actually. You are stupid.

Our next question comes from tradition, I think, is what that says. Nice. You people with your names, man. Say, how do you all meet, and when did you realize that you would really stick with each other, and what are you going to do with all these hard-earned Patreon bucks? I mean, the second one's just going to making sure the podcast is good, and like it. I know we need to get pop filters because there was a couple P's that popped in the last episode that I want to get fixed. But it's really just, I hope to get to a point where we can start doing video.

Yeah. That's the goal. That is the goal, which is expensive because you've got to get cameras. You can't really use. The cameras that I use and that Derek uses really can't be used for podcasts because they're DSLRs and they shut off after a certain amount of time. I think to avoid, I think that's all due to avoid taxes literally for the company. I think I read something that says, like, if you have a camera that can record video but not for a long period of time, it doesn't count as a video camera and it's taxed differently. Interesting.

I didn't even know that. That might be total bullshit, but I heard it, and I think that's kind of cool. It makes sense that everything's usually money-driven. There's always a reason why, and the reason usually is funds. Yeah. Yeah, literally. It's always money. I believe it.

But yeah, so we're going to save up for some cameras that record for a long time. I know exactly the cameras that we need. So we're just going to save up for those. Get a little set up. One of our roommates is moving soon, which means we'll have extra space to set up a little permanent recording area. Yeah. So it'll be way easier, and then you guys will get even more. shit for your buck but how do you all meet i met you in college yeah i met you in college yeah and

we i think we met i think we were just following each other right something like that i i know that uh because i haven't done this in a long time but i used to check when my when the subscribers were pouring in i should check and see who was following me and it would be like the top first and it'll work its way down yeah and i remember you're at like 80k dude and i saw i was like oh who's like who's like Who is this? And then I watched your shit. And I was like, I was surprised you somehow like stumbled upon me first before I stumbled upon you. Followed you.

We started following each other. And then it got to a point where I think in 2017 when I came back from Greece, like we collab pretty soon after that. Yeah, yeah. Or a shitty fucking Q&A. Yeah. I remember watching that video and I was like, oh, that's cute. That was the burger place, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah.

We went to this place called G Burger. That was my first meeting. My first interaction with you was on camera technically. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Like I hadn't met you actually Before that video came out And you recorded you meeting me

Yeah, that's incredibly weird That almost happened to me Just a few days ago Where I always tell people like Hey, shoot your shot in the DMs Like if you're like working with somebody You never know if they're gonna answer or not Yeah

So I DM this dude Xavier Woods or Austin Creed or whatever He has his gaming channel called Up Down Down he's a WWWU wrestler So he's like fucking big you know And I was like hey man If you're gonna be in the area

Because I know Pax It was gonna be going on And I was like, if we're going to be in the area, like, let's collab. Let's go to fucking round one. So, yeah, man, okay. And then, like, we exchanged numbers. But then he got too busy. But I was just like, what the fuck?

That would have been too weird. And I kind of didn't want to do it. Because our first interaction would be like, I'm going to turn on a camera and let's interact with each other. What the fuck is that shit? Yeah. It's real strange. Yeah.

Because there's always a chance that that just does not go well. Yeah. I've definitely done that at least once where, like, I've done videos with someone or, like, we recorded something and just the internet. The chemistry was not there at all. And I was like, I'm just not going to put this out. That's weird. Because there's no purpose.

Yeah. I think I met Derek when, it was VidCon 2017 when you guys came back to the pad. It was you. So the episode of the day you broke the bottle over that girl's head. And then Bunti. It was like the freaking fake like breakaway glass bottle. Yeah, yeah. The sugar glass bottles.

I didn't want you to clarify. I want you to clarify. That was Casarra, I think. Yeah. Yeah. It was Casar there. Yeah. That's when we all met.

And I met Chris. I remember it was one day we were, I was at one of my other friends' house, which was a roommate now. And we were all talking about, we were all talking about how excited you were for destiny. He's been excited for destiny for like a decade now. That's true.

Yeah. And I was like, oh, that shit looks pretty dope. And I made a stupid comment about fucking, um, a comment about like how they look like elites to me. And you were like,

they don't look like fucking elites. Right. You're seeing what that elite looks like. You fucking idiot. And I was like, this guy's, this guy's tripping right now. This guy's actually fucking.

It's tripping right now. I don't remember that. You got so passionate. And I was like, all right, well, I guess they don't. And you just taught me about Halo. And I was like, I'm not going to say that ever again. Because this kid almost downed me. For instance, it's so stupid.

That was like, freshman. I was like, wait, when was that? This was like 2012 or 2013? Really? Was it 2011? No, no, no, 2012. That's when I was in college. Yeah, yeah.

Yeah, that was that we were like, how far into college? I was the beginning. The very beginning of college, yeah. I was like 18. I was a year in. Yeah. Oh, you're a fucking young buck, man. Yeah, you're a bit older than I am.

Yeah, I, even though I look like I'm in high school. Still, which is hilarious. I fucking, I hate it, bro. I really don't like looking at your blessings, man. It's going to come in handy in a couple years. It will later, but right now, like, I'll just say this. Women my age, you know, I'm 31. That's so fucking weird.

You're 31 years old. That's insane. Yeah. Women my age, they look at me, like, say, if we don't know each other, like, I'm fucking in high school. Like, what are you even doing here? I feel that. I understand that. Yeah.

I look. I'm weird because I'm big, but my faces look very aged. So when I have picture her, I look like a youngish kid with a bunch of gross facial hair. That's it. You look like the, you know, I couldn't place your age if I didn't know. Yeah. You know, you could be 28 or 21

For real It's weird I get that all the time It's like, how old are you? It's like, I'm like, I'm like 26 And they're like, No,

you're not I'm like, I am. I am, I swear. Actually, I'm having 26, I'm 25.

I don't even fucking know. How do you get that wrong? Because I stopped caring about my age when I was like 20. I mean, I agree. I actually, you know,

I don't give me. Yeah, okay. Flemian up. Fair enough. Yeah, there's really no reason to care. Yeah.

I forgot I was 31 for a minute. Like not too long ago So when I hit 30 I'm like whoa sick I'm 30 now use coke or something like that Well 30 is 30 is 30 is

30 is the coke year Dude when you turn 30 Things A lot of things go off In your mind about like legacy And what you've been doing It's fucked Yeah

It really it really makes That's already going off of my head So I'm like 25 yeah Dude you guys are too fucking young for that shit bro I'm serious Okay sorry old head boomer Sorry, boomer. I know.

I know. I saw like I'm fucking in my 50s and some shit. You better make sure you get a family and you establish yourself right. Dude, you got to have a family. You start thinking about that shit, though, man. Like, I think about that sometimes already.

Yeah, I think about that already too. I was like, I got to get married before I'm 30. That's the like literally thing that I think. And I'm like, I don't know if I do I want to do that really? Probably not.

Is my body telling me? It was my heart telling me. My body's telling me this shit now. Because me, I'm like, I ain't fucking ready for nothing right now. But I just feel this thing. I feel this thing now Like how bitches will be like

Oh I need to have a kid Dude it happens to dudes too I'll see these dumb I'll see a dumb ass little fucking like daughter I was watching I see a dumb ass little daughter You're a daughter I was

I was watching this like 20 minute thing About Chuck Liddell When the UFC when he was like huge And then after he retired It showed him playing with his kids And I was like man that looks nice And I'm like what the fuck I'm like what the

Yeah I catch myself like I can't believe I'm feeling this shit dude Yeah Like I don't want that shit shit at all right now, but there's a feeling that's like, oh yeah, yeah, you do. Don't fuck, don't fuck around. Yeah, you do. You want a young.

Yeah, you want a young. You want a young? It's freaky, man. I really, I really would love kids, but I'm so terrified at, like, what kind of parent I'll be because I was, I was, like, in between, like, the, like, very strict, like, Caribbean, Hispanic, like, upbringing.

But then at the same time, when I got a little older, my grandmother kind of, like, chilled out with me. And, like, I don't know how, I just can't discipline children. I just don't have the ability in my heart to, like, be stern with them at all. Yeah, I think. It's just weird. I couldn't raise one. I couldn't.

Fuck it. I'd leave it. I'd love it. I think, like, the weird thing is, like, I, my biggest fear is that, like, I don't like the idea of a thing that is here purely because of me. That it, that does its own thing, completely independently of what I have to say. Eventually, eventually it's no longer a part of you. It's its own entity. It just freaks me out.

Imagine like just imagine if that kid just becomes like Ayatollah Kamani. Or like Charles Manson or something. It's like, I swear, I swear I didn't mean to do that. You know, and then you can't. And you got to feel like some level of responsibility for that. It's not only yours. It's yours and someone else. So you put the blame on someone else.

Yeah. Yeah, but like you know in your heart of hearts. You're like, if you just didn't do that, that wouldn't happen. Or like, what if it's the worst traits of you and the person you were with? Yeah, a kid is just the worst part. Like me, I have a pretty, even shorter. I have a pretty, oh, man, I'd be bad for you. That'd be bad.

I got to, I got to have a kid with like a six foot. However at least be. Just have it be 510. A girl that's 510 will produce like a 6 4 fucking food. I feel like it's true. I mean, maybe. Yeah, I'm sure that's true. I've seen it.

I've seen a lot, bro. I've seen like, I don't know how this happened. I mean, normal people can have midget kids. Yeah. I mean, that's, yeah, I'm serious. But that's usually because either there was a, A thing in their DNA that they're already disposed to? Wait, exposed.

It doesn't matter. Yeah, whatever I'm trying to say. Or they fucked around while they were pregnant, you know? Like that. Fuck. And my wife let a midget fuck. I would. I would erupt.

I would lose my. I'd be like, you need to go far away from me. I'll be real. I don't even know if I don't even know if what I just said was true. I don't know if that's true. I don't know if normal people can have midget kids The thing is that the first All I know is that I saw a Seinfeld episode where that was true

Oh, so you're basically not a side Okay literally Well you know I thought about I thought about like where did I get that information from it? I'm like oh yeah Humans weren't midgets first and they I mean humans weren't little people first And it became little people

That's not like a good term So like there have to be like I think it's just like a defect Yeah it is as it is as a offensive As that may sound to a little person I'm sorry. It is a defect. So no offense.

Like you can have like something happens. You can actually drink like a motherfucker and do drugs. And then you can possibly have, you know, either, you know, all the other, all of the. Any number of things. Or we can have a pee kid. Yeah. So a lot of things. I don't have a pee kid honestly than.

The disabled kid. Than most other things. Yeah. I think we just totally like. You can be like Peter Dinklage, man. I would love to have a pee kid because that would be so, I would have so much fun with that child. Like we would go on the coolest dad and son adventures. Ever.

Like, my son would be like, my dad's cool. He'd be like, Lord of the Rings. Like, exactly. I put him on my shoulder and he like stands on my shoulder and like points directions for me. I'm like, got it. We'll go there. Don't worry. I get like a pretty big dog.

He rides the dog. I guess it's a war hound or some shit like that. That'd be fucking amazing. It's, this answers the first part of your question right here. It's like, how did you know that you would really stick? Because these are the conversations that have been happening constantly every time we, we get together. Yeah.

And it just happens pretty naturally. And I think I noticed immediately, like, whenever we would do those annual Twitter trashes. Oh, yeah. That people just really like that shit. Yeah. It made no sense not to just do it more often. I think I learned when, um, when me, you, uh, me, Chris, Derek and Bunty, we hung out one day. And that whole day you were laughing for fucking hours nonstop.

And I was like, this is good. Yeah. These guys I don't have a problem talking to at all. Yeah. It's like one of those things where I feel like you guys are homies. Like I would have easily gravitated towards you guys if I would have been in the same area in the same vicinity if I grew up in New York around you guys. That would have happened because my friends that I grew up with very similar.

Gotcha. Very filthy minded individuals. Very like horrible, horrible like human beings. You would think. You know, just because of the type of shit that comes out of our mouths. But you know, all good people. You know what I mean? Yeah.

Yeah. I think for the most part. Yeah. I'm pretty, I'm pretty, I'm pretty human. I'm pretty human. I mean, my bar is pretty, my bar is pretty high for like, you have to do some really horrible shit when I mean, like, you gotta be bad.

You have to be really, because I mean, okay, I grew up in this Hispanic neighborhood, and a lot of, there was a lot of Cholos. We're both Hispanic. Okay. Hey, this is a real thing. There was a lot of Cholos there. And a lot of them did horrible things.

This guy that I knew, you know, he killed a guy, went to jail for 11 years, came out, And he seems like a pretty cool dude to me. You know what I mean? Even though he killed so much. I would be terrified. Yeah.

That's the one thing where I was like, you know. It was a, I'm not even going to say the gang names, but there was just two rival gangs, and I knew some of them pretty well. They seem like really nice dudes, but they were killing people. So like, I don't have my. I know, I have been, I have sat down with people and played smash bros, people that are literally monsters. I've sat down. I've hung out. I've been, they've cooked for me.

I have been like, really. cool friends with bad bad people but they've just only shown me kindness so who am I to say they're really that bad yeah things are complicated yeah because everybody's everybody's opinion is shaped by their personal experience of a person yes yeah and if like you even if you had like all the facts

you would you still would have to view it through the lens of somebody of you of you of you so it is yeah I get there's only like I have just I feel like a reasonable couple of lines I think if you kill somebody I have to really evaluate you you know if you kill somebody it depends

I don't know why he did it. The intent. It's like there's self-defense and like there's, you know, if you're a soldier or whatever. Yeah. But for some reason, gang culture kind of gets a pass a little bit. That's the thing that's weird with me. Because like, if you see like this a normal fucking like, say if it was one of those like Columbine type of people, then you'd be like, oh, fuck that guy.

But then there's like a thug that's just like smoke somebody in the rival gang. And you're like, yeah. What the thing about living to me in the Columbine guys, that people from Columbine did that shit for no good fucking reason. It was mass murder for, like... Well, gangs don't really have a good reason either. They don't have a good reason. They don't have a good reason.

Like, the gangs do it for the reason that the other gangs do it, and it's to defend themselves against the other gangs who would do it if they didn't do it. Like, that's literally the reason. It's a standstill until someone acts and does something. It's like, all right, then you started this whole problem. Yeah, so, like, with a Columbine kid, he's just like... Hey, Brad, what are you doing with your little Mario backpack?

What are you going to go home and play Sonic Boom on the Nintendo... 3DS or whatever the fuck? You fucking, you pussy. And then he comes to school tomorrow with a fucking AK and a fucking bunch of C4 liquid. Fucking drenches the place. Like, there's no good reason. Drenches, yo, drenched with bullets. I knew a guy that probably...

Falling off of him. I knew a guy that if we didn't... You know, if we kept... If we continued to bully him, he would have done something. And the thing is, look, why the bullying even took place? Because I'm not really... I'm not a bully, but I did do some bullies. bullying, right?

Who did? I think everybody was, yeah, because everybody was, everyone was bullied a little bit, so everybody, like, it's just a, it's a very bad,

vicious cycle, it's true. If you're, like, I was bullied a little bit, and then, like, I started fighting people.

And then, like, oh shit, this feels good. Yeah. And I started bullying people a little bit. I was like,

oh, this is not, what's happening. I'll be real. Like, I'm super glad that I had bullies. I'm not going to lie.

Yeah. Perspective. Makes you a harder person, too. Yeah. had it pretty good for the most part you know I got bit up like twice in my life when you hear about the type of shit I've never I I I fought the same guy twice well I got in one fight because we're playing touch football and the guy tackled me and then I went like I got really mad when he when I

tried to get up and he pushed me down again so we fought and then there's this guy super nerd right super duper nerd and and the thing is it just kept it just was circumstantial people kept cutting it in front of him to get a drink water after we ran the half mile and uh this big dude named jerry was like here you go derrick he pushes him and then he does the whole gentleman like here you go sir and i'm walking up like laughing like thank you you know being like we're gentlemen so that nerd takes it out on me i didn't do it i didn't push him is he bring the strap jerry so he took it out of me try to give me the headlock i hit him three times you fell and then i was like fuck i got to get out of here i don't want to get suspended the same fucking day because i used to get rides

from this guy named Wesley home from school. I was like, oh, Wesley's not here today. But my boy, this dude's name with Bradley. Bradley could pick you up. After I just fought the guy, I got a ride home from him. It was so fucking weird. And you didn't say anything. That is weird. Two years later, this was sixth grade, two years later in eighth grade,

he started getting a little hostile and started talking a lot of shit and saying racist stuff. Those same way that you'd use the buzzwords to piss people off. Yeah, yeah. Like you'd be like, shut before I slap you back. to Africa, you whatever, and I'm like, oh, shit. Like, whoa. But the thing is, it was kind of funny showing him that he was like, his vigor, it was kind of

hilarious. We kind of liked it. So for a while, we were like, he'd be trying to ride his bike home. Like, he'd be on the track. And then I'd be trying to throw my football at him as he's riding. So funny. It was kind of like a thing. He would talk shit and I would try to throw my football at him.

One day, I got a rivalry. Yeah. One day I got ahead of him. I got ahead of him. Hit in a bush. And as he was, like, riding his bike kind of coast is clear, I rose, like, the fucking Phoenix, and I threw the ball at him. And there was a bunch of people watching. And so he tried to get me a headlock again.

I was like, oh, shit, here we go. Classic. And then I fucking, I just threw him down because he's like, he's soft. He was dough. And then I just, I threw him down. I grabbed my football and I saw everyone was laughing. And I guess when I was picking up the football, when he got up on the ground, he did some crazy, like, kung fu shit, like waving his arms around. Like, he was ready to destroy me.

And everyone was laughing. laughing at him and I was like dude I didn't I this wasn't supposed to happen the the the the the the the the chick Michelle she was like how sad like why would you do that I was like I didn't fuck dude this was it was just a game of like he talks shit I throw a ball at him and then it turned into me being the biggest piece of shit ever and um but yeah it didn't continue after that and I feel like if it would have he would have definitely killed everybody in our high school because he was that type of person you got to calm down when you pick like you got to you got to you got choose who you pick on because some the the the quiet kid that sits in the back of the class

they wears trench coats in the summer you can tell like he's already predisposed like if he's scrawny white glasses and gets angry and then mutters under his voice you got you got to you got to watch out for him man yeah it sounds really dangerous yeah you're describing that was that was him without the trench coat i remember being in uh i had him in like algebra two and this guy was he was so angry i was like dude i got to get out of this class he's gonna like kill every i'm I swear. Like, there was a point in algebra two in the second semester where we were doing something so absurd that you would never use ever. You know, it was one of those things.

He was so mad. I was like, dude, I got, I, I, I, it was one of the things that helped me leave. I'm getting the fuck out of this classroom because I literally think he's going to kill people. Because he was so just angry for no, I mean, I get it. Math is fucking retarded. Oh, yeah, it sucks. But it was just like, it was just one of those things. I'm like, dude, come on.

And you can through your nose, out through your mouth. in that concoction, you know, it's quiet, sits at the back of the class, where's a trench coat? I feel like the trench coat is carrying a lot of that, carrying a lot of the percentage. I don't think any... You see somebody in a trench coat regardless of whether or not they're quiet and they sit back in the back of the class. Yeah, trench coat definitely, like, it's the biggest statement. They exist to hide things. Yeah.

Like, that's their entire purpose is to conceal. things that could not be concealed with normal clothes. The reason why trench coats go so low is because they're meant to conceal fucking rifles and very long guns. I know some kid, I know some kid I was not at my school, I was not at my school, I was not at my school,

there was some kid had like big curly hair and he wore a trench coat. And I remember one time I was just playing like, I was hanging out near Jay and I saw him and I felt dread. It felt like fear and I was like I'm going to start walking home four miles away because this guy He's a herald

Is doom And he looked around a lot And I was like Oh man He looked around a lot I was like oh man This is it That's awesome

So In ejection here Yeah Sam Fletcher Wrote in Would you rather be addicted To crack Or be a furry

That's easy for me Is it easy for you Yeah What is the choice for you No crack Oh You're a furry bro You Freudian slipped

I almost I almost said furries are something very terrible. I almost said like a terrible phrase. Okay. And I stopped myself because I didn't want to get this. You would rather be addicted to crack? Absolutely.

I don't know if I want to be addicted to anything. Because. Although I guess if you're a furry, you're kind of addicted to being a fucking weird. Yeah. Thank you so much. I'm glad someone else understands that. Look. Look, man.

Look. I don't get, look. Look, personal experience time. Oh, shit. Personal experience. You have a personal experience with a furry? About furries? No way you do.

Personal, like personal, like personal. personal feelings. Okay. Okay. I love werewolves. They are the coolest fucking badass creatures ever. They're fucking super dope, you know. Like people being werewolves is like,

oh man, I have this power within me and this primal rage and I want to release it. That's fucking sick, you know? But then the furries came to existence, right? And it made one of my favorite kinds of creatures just disgusting and always have these weird fucking smiles on.

And they just look. Every time they're drawn, they're just, they're drawn like, they're just drawn not the right way not the way that I want to see they really did fuck werewolves up they really did yeah and

I really I believe you man my favorite characters from like everything it's always the werewolf I remember killer instinct there was fucking saber wolf I love saber wolf there was you talk about Blood War II there was Hugo the boxer fucking boy

there was Jonathan Talbane from Darkstalkers they're like those are my favorite I love werewolves Valchenheim from freaking what you call it Blaze Blue. Like there's so many cool werewolves. Like they're fucking Van Housing, I think. And like some of the stories was a fucking werewolf too.

The general idea of just the transformation was cool. Yeah. Like into anything. Like even Dracula. Like vampires turning into bats. Yeah. Like that shit's cool as shit. Yeah.

And then like this thing happened. And now like I can't like I like all of that stuff marginably less. Like I measureably less. I can't voice how I feel about that. I could not agree with you more. It really did. It makes me almost ashamed. I was like, I don't want to put stuff out there

because people are gonna associate it and probably think, this guy's probably a fucking furry. It's like, you know the, what is it? I hate it. You know Zootopia? Yeah, yeah. That movie is good. But like, I can't like it. Some of the cons. Because I just can't, I can't like, I can't like it. Like, I like it.

Like, some of the shit I've seen from Zootopia, some of the fucking raw, just rank shit put on fucking Oh, like the deviant art type shit. Some of the shit I've seen has just been so, disheartening towards humankind. Debian art is a whole nother. Debian heart is a darned. It's fucking nighttime. I have seen Buzz Lightyear with a 50 ton pregnant stomach fingering himself with some shit that I've never seen before. That shit is fucking on fucking like it is literally some of the most depraved twisted shit I've seen in my life. Devant

one might say. Yeah. And I have I have sat down on LiveLeak for hours. Yeah, but that stuff is like just worse. I think I genuinely would rather see the video of the guy getting baybladed by the train on LiveLevelace. Jesus Christ. Then go back to seeing anything on Deviant Arc. That video is funny until you start seeing blood. That video isn't funny at all.

It's like laugh at all. That humans going through that emotion is like, how people don't do that, tops do that. And then it's funny in the way that like, it's funny in the way that like seeing a really bad car accident's funny it's like ha ha ha I'm in shocks yeah like yeah like it's like I wouldn't tell this as a joke but like maybe I have to laugh because otherwise I'll cry or scream and neither of those are manly good point I'm tough man I laugh at tragedy tragedy make funny for me so are you saying uh overall you'd think you'd rather be addicted to crack though me definitely you know what about you Chris I guess in retrospect

Think of how much they harm you. Just let it crash. Literally hurt. Like, I don't know, man. Let it fester. Let it let the hatred. I mean, there's a lot of cool ass niggas man on the block.

They seem like they're doing all right. I know a lot of crackheads who are like, you know, they're crackheads. So, you know, that's a detriment. But other than that, there's like a lot of wisdom in them.

I don't know. Your movie sucks is pretty cool. I like, I like why I'm ass. He's a furry. Exception to the rule. Yeah, like,

it's weird that I'm like, my mind doesn't compete. I'm like, How are you a furrow? But I feel bad beating up on the thing That like one of my friends is Yeah, I mean I really don't

To be honest Like Sonic Fox is like What you call? He's a He's a freshman video game World class And he's a furry And he's gay

Didn't he accept Like an award in a fur suit Yeah he did What for for for MKXX He's fucking monster Whole ass beast And like he's cool you know But like

But like But like But see it's weird But see it's weird There's a correlation With gay people And furries What is that?

Really? That's a good old shit. That's a real one. That's why Adam. Adam's gay as fuck. Yeah. And he's in the furry Sonic. Yeah, I guess. No, there really is. Like, there's a weird, it's a lot of dudes

dress up in furry shoots and fuck each other. I don't know what that's about. Yeah, I wonder if there are straight people who do it who are just a little bit more ashamed of that because it's a little, it's way fucking weirder. Probably. For some reason, it is weirder for straight people to be furrow. Then it's like I don't know why that's actually crazy well because like it's it's like it's like yeah like if it's some gay guy

I'm like yeah whatever man that's like that's like that's like weird and I don't get it at all but I think it's whatever I think it's the way that a lot of us like when we think about jolly gay dudes when we think about West Hollywood gay dudes and shit how this the life of the party and they love to dress up and stuff it's not a huge step to put on a costume I guess I get yeah I guess it's more like yeah it's kind of like Theatric. Yeah. It's more, it's more,

is more, is this more to the performance. This is probably such an insanely offensive conversation. I mean, maybe. I mean, I'm really sorry, like,

if I'm offending anyone. I feel like it's not, because it's like, it's weird, we're just, we're not, it's not like we have fucking wisdom on this. We're just thinking what we're just thinking about,

like, ignorant, we're trying to figure out some sort of idea. Like, a furry can call, like, could fucking write in and say, well,

no, this is how it goes down. I have experience in, in the fucking fandom or whatever you call the community. Thank you for the information. Yeah. I hung out, I think, at VidCon once with Adam and his friends. And they seemed all really chill. Yeah.

So, like, nothing against them in general. I just really don't. I can't understand it. Yeah. And whatever. That's just life, I guess. I should have asked Adam about it because I went to Vegas with him and some other people. Oh, yeah.

Oh, yeah, that's right. I was supposed to go. Yeah, that's right. Yeah. Dude, one of the only reasons I went, obviously it was Mim's birthday. Yeah, yeah. One of the other reasons I went because I thought you were going to go. Because I'm pretty fucking lazy too, and I'm like, I'm pretty like whatever.

And I was like, all right, Chris is going to go, show this motherfucker a good time. And then like I booked my flight. You're like, I'm going. I was like, fuck. Yeah, I wasn't ready to do Vegas. I think also like, I don't know, there was something. Something. I don't really remember.

It was too long ago. It was a while ago. It was like a year ago. It literally was a year ago. Yeah. Because I went in January last year. So, Chris, what would you rather be? I guess a crackhead.

Yeah, cracket. You too, sir? I would have to say, one of the main reasons why I'd rather be a crackhead is because I hate being really hot. And I can't imagine being in that fucking suit. I can't imagine being in that. I feel like I would suffocate. I'm not claustrophobic, but I can't imagine being that really hot suit for more than, it's too much. It seems devastatingly annoying.

And see, like, I think I'd way rather smoke crack. And I feel like... I like crack is dope. And here's a certain extent. And here's the thing. It's not like being addicted to it, but using it. I feel like a lot of people that really fuck themselves up off shit like that have addictive personalities. I don't.

I know people, and this is a weird... No, but this is the caveat of the... This is the whole point of the question. You would be addicted to crack. So, you have to be a crackhead. I know functioning, like, crack addicts. What's that thing? I've heard people use...

I'm not even heard. I have friends in the punk scene. that used meth recreationally. How the fuck. Exactly. Look, man. So that's why I would take the chance with crack. Yeah, fair enough.

I guess one of my friends, that is a functioning drug addict. He is literally, like, he works as a fucking accountant or some shit in like Manhattan, but he's addicted to cocaine. Yeah, that makes sense. Straight up. He's, like, badly addicted. Cocaine is so much more common than I ever thought it was. It's big. Like, it's actually wild.

Yeah, you'd see that shit at, like, I don't know, like, I Carly season finale. And then, like, everybody's like, hey, bring your cook. We're going to watch the final episode of Arthur. I'm just telling you just how I feel, sniff. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. I'm glad you brought up Icarly, sir. Oh, my God. I'm glad he brought up Icarly, because.

All right, so there's a few of us fans. A few of you fans know. Oh, man. You guys know that I have an infatuation with Jeanette. McCurdy, but so does Chris Raygun. And to be honest, I feel like it's a bit of an issue for me.

It's a problem. It's a problem. And this is why it's a problem to me. I feel like on some very low level, that it's possible that one of us could possibly maybe like getting contacted, maybe at some point go on a date

or some shit. I feel like that's like a real, I think there's like... It's so implausible. I think it's like a 10% Like 10. I think it's why it bothers me. It's like she seems like the type of person. I mean, Jeanette McCurdy, not a Sam, whatever the fuck her name was. I feel like the real person seems chill enough to where she might. Yeah.

I would agree with that. And so there's a thing where it's like we've sent like DMs to her, right? Oh my God. We've sent DMs to her. And like I just, you know, like I said, a guy that fucking has like two million, he's a superstar. and the DVD and everything. He responded. So there's a possibility, like, there's a possibility

that she could see it and actually respond. So the fact that you're kind of, like, putting that energy out there, it upsets me a little bit. It's funny, but at the same time, I'm like, hey, man. Listen, man, it is what it is. I don't know what to tell you. I mean, you got to do that, too. Every now and again, just cycle.

He's going to notice one of ours eventually. Well, here's the deal. And I'm fine with whatever, honestly. I don't care. I just want to be noticed. None of someone succeeds. So I've been noticed technically because she liked one of my comments. So I forgot it was on one of her posts.

And I said something stupid like, oh, I said one of my fans has stage 10 ass cancer. And his dying wish is for us to go on a date. She liked that comment. That's awesome. Day 10. Don't forget his ass cancer, man. So he's a fuck. He's a tumor.

So there was that one, but that was like the only thing. And I told this story because I made a video about Jeanette McCurdy having a crush on Jordan Peterson. That's right. Yeah, totally like confirmed. Like I think I think it's real. I told the story that I used to work, I used to be an accountant at this RV dealership. And there was a mechanic that his wife was best friends with Jeanette. And I was like, what are the fucking odds?

This is in like 2014. I was like, what are the odds? And then this guy, he was like, oh yeah. Like here's a picture of her holding my baby And I was like, this is fucking real How is this possible? And then so he was like, oh, so you like her? I'm like, dude, like, how about I invite her over for dinner

And I'll invite you over and you guys are like And I was like, that's fucking weird, bro. But I'm down, you know, but. Did that ever happen? It didn't happen. Damn. He got laid off because it was starting to get the slow season in December. Nobody fucking rents RVs in December.

Yeah. So they're like, all right, you guys get out of here And they had to get rid of some of the mechanics. So it never happened. That sucks. I didn't take his number down. I didn't take anything down. I was like, dude, I feel like that was my one real shot.

That was a pretty real shot. What kind of fucking coincidence is that, bro? How many people like, oh, this mechanic just happens. His wife has to be a best friend Jeanette. What the fuck is that? That is insane. That's hilarious. That is wild.

So weird. And I like, what a fucking squatter. What a retarded thing for me to do to not get that guy's number. You had your chance, man. I'm sorry. Everybody has those experiences, I think. Do something like that happened to me, too. Or like, when I first moved here in, like, 2015 or 2016.

I can't remember which year. where it was with Elliot, a friend of ours. We were here at the same time, and I think it was Glendale. Joe was living in like on Acacia. And we were getting a lift somewhere. It was my first experience with Lyft. I think it was like using Uber constantly

and like I hated it and I was like, all right, whatever. He was like, no, you got to use Lyft, man. It's like way better because Elliot's a hipster and he does whatever the opposite of, you know, that is, whatever the mainstream is. So I was like, all right, we'll use your lift. And he calls this lift and this girl picks us up.

And she's the coolest person I think I've ever met honestly still. But dude, it was insane. Like, she's like this punk chick. She had all these tattoos. She was like, like, yeah, man, I love this shit. And it's like, oh, man, I got Weezer's drumsticks in the back. And I'm like, what? Oh, no shit.

You have Weezer's drumsticks? It's like, yeah, they're in the like the glove or they're in like the little, uh, the little pouch behind the seat. Check it out. And it's like, and they're like, they're like sign. I'm like, what the fuck? You just keep Weezer's drumsticks in the night. And it was like the most enthralling conversation I ever had.

And I walked out of the Uber. And I was just like, wait. like I was totally like fuck I should have got like I should have got we were hitting it off so well yeah I should have I should have I should have that could have derailed my entire life honestly I could have been something because that would have been that's insane I still think about it I think it's still honestly subconsciously why I use lift oh I just for them for the vague chance that that happens again like go back in the app and like you don't think I did that oh yeah I called Elliot I was like give me the number of the of the lift like I try

This shit down as best I couldn't. I still couldn't find the person. That's crazy. That's one of those, yeah. They call it the one that got away type of deal. They call it that type of story. Do I have that story? I don't know.

Like, for me, I just, I've had such a litany of bad relationships. Like, so many just, like, horrible, horrible relationships that I think, like, the last, like, the only really good girl I've had, like, ever is my current girlfriend. And I just didn't allow it to go away. I was like, I'm just, I can't deal with this bullshit I've had before. So you're like very force of and abusive and stuff? I try. Now listen to here, right?

Disputes happen and arguments happen. Sure, sure. That's impossible. Sometimes you can't help but exchange blows. Sometimes people get heated, but you have to use your words. Okay. Has it risen to fist? No, no.

Not seriously. Never. Never. Never. I've been serious. I'm not, I've been serious. Yeah. Hey, man, that's cool, man.

That's good. Like, that's the type of. what's going on with you is the type of experience that like I feel like I need because when I when I started thinking about things in retrospect I started thinking about my list of track list of dating and like this is this is not good like I don't have enemies and shit as exes but it's just I was like what the fuck's going on and one of my one of my home girls tried to say that oh I think you're addicted to dating long distance and I was like fuck no it just happens to I think

because of where I live in L.A. And in the L.A. surrounding area. There's a lot of cool chicks here. But most of them are fucking, they're already spoken for or whatever. It's just like a thing. It's hard to find that shit. It's hard to find people in general in a city. Yeah.

And look, for some fucking reason, the coolest girls I've ever met, like the ones that like so fucking chill live absolutely nowhere near me. Like, say, I dated a girl that was like 2015. I was involved with a girl in Germany. Yeah. And it was just a weird circumstance. thing. I'm not trying. That's the continental.

Bro. I didn't try. Dude, I moved to Greece for a few months like a year after that in 2016. And so that was another thing that just happened. And it was, I'm not forcing any of this shit. Oh, guess what? One of the coolest, and still one of the coolest fucking people I've ever met.

I mentioned, I think, on the last podcast that there was this, my ex I used to watch EFucked with. So this girl, and you met her. You met her. You met this girl She was my previous ex She was one of the coolest Fucking people ever met

She happened to live in Fucking Norway I met her too I think Yeah yeah yeah She's kind of dope dude She's cool people She's cool I like as far as like

People really do And I'm like Where is that shit In my vicinity And I'm not trying That's why I feel like Jeanette's one of those people That can be really fun and cool

But obviously that's like Untouchable I don't think it's like really real Obviously I like to keep the energy out there She does seem very very just chill She does Like that's the vibe that she gets out Yeah

And it seems like she's like Because she's not like, I don't know, she's not like a supermodel level attractive. It's like this like kind of like, oh, she seems like somebody who would like live next door. Yes. That I would like kind of like. Yeah. Be vaguely interested in.

I totally agree with you. I actually just happened. Somebody replied to because I did one of those Q&A's on Instagram and this one girl said, uh, I don't like, why, why are you so obsessed with her? She's not even that pretty. And I, I responded with, uh, well, it's not, it's not just about looks. It's, it's clearly not just about looks like. She's obviously attractive, but the, the vibes that she gives off.

She seems like a really j. genuine, like, decent person. Like, and that's why... She's doing this show now, I think. It's called I'm glad my mom died. Yeah. And I'm like... I was like, what's this?

That's ridiculous. Like, what's this? She's a musician. Like, she plays guitar. She actually has a great singing voice. She has a lot of different qualities that I like. That's why I'm like, okay, cool, cool, cool. Go for it, man.

But yes, keep it up. I mean, I'm really am just like, you know, just trying to do my own thing when I focus. I'm right now I'm focused on getting in shape, right? If something happens to fall on my lap, cool, but I'm really trying my best not to Like, because, like, this is my home girl said, like, I think you're, you're addicted to the long-distance thing. I'm not.

I swear. I want to date in my area. But, hey, guess what? Another girl that I just stumbled upon that happens to be super fucking dope. Very pretty. She lives in Brazil. And I'm like, nope, I'm not doing it. You're just not American, man.

I think just, like, you're not American brand, man. I fucking, dude. I would, like, geneticism is probably as Americans as it comes, right? I would, if that was a real. I can't think of anything more American than Jeanette McCurdy from my Carley. Honestly. Yeah, bro. Yeah.

Like, she, I think she really does embody America. Like, she's eating, like, all this disgusting meat all the time and just being a dickhead and shit like that. That's kind of the American way. She's a bully. I like that. I think that's like, like, bullies. I think that really embodies, like, what the American individual. And, but yeah, I'm not, I'm not really trying to go on it because about fucking her all day and all that shit.

But I'm really, I really am trying to not have it come to, like, oh, I'm somehow going to fly outside of the fucking country and see another broad because... Long distance is hard. It's very hard. And I don't... Look, I don't... The reason I don't rule it out, though, is because of H3H3.

Like, Ethan and Ila, it was one of those things that worked out perfectly. They met over doing that weird museum thing, the museum of holocausting or whatever the... The Holocaust. They met at the Holocaust Museum. Yeah, that's it. Yeah. Is that funny?

Where they halt Yeah, they met there Imagine hitting on a woman At a Holocaust museum Kind of ballsy Guys don't get hit on in the same way though Fuck no It's always gross actually

It's always like really fucking morbid What? Whatever girls hit on me It's like always some like Some like just inappropriate It's just rude Like I don't talk to me like that right now It is

It is very weird Something that I've learned Throughout my life Is that I've been I've been What do you call it Not assaulted

But sexually like groped in. I've been me-toed a bunch of times. Countless times. Yeah. And it's like, it's something that dudes, I guess we don't talk about it because it's like, oh, whatever. You know, we're just kind of like, I was going to take that seriously. Yeah. Thanks. But I was like so there's, I can, I can, we can have an entire podcast about

the amount of times like uncomfortable or weird shit has happened. Oh, yo. Right? So I'm a blackmail. That shit happens to us all the time. So I feel you on you say like what, what you were kind of saying. I do, I understand that. Yeah. And. It's, it's weird. It's insane. man. I had a manager at Sears. It's like female manager at Sears who would literally just like grab my ass constantly. And I was like, I can't do anything.

I need my seven. I need my seven dollars and 25 cents an hour. It happens to us to. It's not as common and it's usually not as graphic. Yeah. I think it is common. Genuinely. It's pretty common. I just don't think we care. I just don't think we care. We don't care and also because we know that we could probably just punch them. Exactly. The power, the power dynamic is the biggest

change of like, yeah, I could have whipped any of those girls' asses. that fucking, you know, I totally could have whipped any of their asses. But, like, so it's not necessarily putting me in an uncomfortable situation because I know I can escape it immediately. It's just annoying. Yeah, it's just annoying. It's like, hey, I'm not with that. What are you doing?

You're like, you doing? And then it's, it becomes a little different, though, like, say if there's an insanely hot girl and she does some crazy, you're kind of like, you're probably going to overlook it. Like, even if you didn't want it, you're probably going to be like, well, well, we should be like, well, at least she was hot. You know what I'm saying? Yeah, I probably would. Yeah.

I'd be like, oh, she's just tracked her. Like, if I was, like, working at Sears and Jeanette McCurdy, like, grab my ass. I'd be like, hey, don't do that. Seriously, that's not cool. But, like, years ago, me, I'd be like, fucking dope. Yeah. Sick. I'm going to end with this, though.

I, to be 100% honest, if you ended up, like, somehow dating Jeanette. I'm not going to do that. Look, I'm just saying, if you did, look, I would, I would concede, but I would not be happy for you. I'd be 100% real. I would I would not ruin your relationship. I wouldn't say anything. If you somehow got married, it got to that point.

I'd show up to the wedding, but I'd be. Here's a promise. If I get a response, I'll refer her to you. Genuinely. Because I don't need. That's because that's going to be another public relationship.

And I, done. Okay. That's a good point. I've never had that before. So I don't know what that's like. Because that was fucking wild. It's headlines that I've,

in articles I've read. The shit I've seen, someone that isn't, even involved in that shit enough. The shit I've seen has been like, okay. How wild was that shit, dude? How, like, is that some, like, meta shit? Because, like, you've seen smear shit about other people, smear campaigns or whatever.

How weird is it that happening to you? How do you feel, like, how do you feel about all that shit? That shit was weird, man. Yeah. I don't know how to process that. That shit was like, yeah, when I was seeing Lacey, it was, like, just, for some reason, that relationship was, like, a symbol to people. Uh-huh.

And, like, people, like, really put it up on some pedestal, and then they were, like, the constantly talking about it. I wonder what's going on. It's like, oh my God. In the same way of like Romeo and Juliet, you know, those two,

the house is coming together. It was interesting. Yeah. I get why it was a big deal at the time. Yeah. But like the fact that it persisted. Yeah. It shouldn't have.

It was like, it's not that crazy. It's a fucking wild. It was like, it should have been like anything else on the internet. Big deal in a week and then everyone gives, no one remember and gives a fuck about it anymore,

like after a week or something. Yeah. I think if we, I think if we were like new to the internet, that thing would have destroyed us entirely. Thankfully, like we had like years of experience. Yeah. On the internet.

I saw her like literally yesterday. And everything's like fine. Oh, no shit. Which is sick. That's cool. That's cool. Yeah. It's good that it's safe.

But man, that was fucking wild. When you see your face on the New York Times, you're on New York Times? On the website from the New York Times, they wrote an article about us. How fucking wild is that shit, bro? What is the big deal, dude? This should not be on the New York Times. I'm sure that I'm sure when that was written like 50 people died in some fucking crazy car bombing in Iraq or something.

Yeah. Or some crazy shit that was like, why is that not being reported? Some bill was not allowed to be passed that should have been passed. But your face is on your time instead. Insane man. That was anxiety. That one. That specific one was like, why the what the fuck?

My cousins were telling me like, I saw you on the news. I was like, what the fuck? What does that mean? And because of that, like a lot of a lot of my family who hadn't been aware of my channel found my channel. And now every time Now every time I go back There's always like a cousin who brings friends Who are like fans

And it's like Oh my God really Yeah That shit's fucking corrosive man I hope my family never figures out Any of the internet bullshit I do It's my family's too like Old world traditional

Like bunch of like smart asses around a table Like I can't I can't have my family's not like that Like my cousin will come My cousin like when I was there for New Year's this past This past month Yeah You know like

I went to my parents place We did the New Year's thing And my cousin brought over like a couple friends They were like oh we're big friends You're in my house You're in my child You're in my childhood house That's gross

I can be pissed Where you can like dig through my shit If you wanted to Like it's just fucking weird man Like you could leave the room And this fuck with my stuff That's just that's too much That's so many converging lines

That absolutely crossing line Get the fuck out of my house What are you doing here It was very weird I would fuck that because I'm like you don't bring them back again so I'll break you yeah they're not allowed here yeah that's that's real talk and yeah

like I appreciate fans and everything obviously like it's super cool that that's even possible at all but at the same time it's like I don't know like I got postmates the other day and like the postmate was like I'm a big fan I'm a big fan of your stuff like my boyfriend's in the car he's like he does everything that I think she said my boyfriend

does what he does because of you oh shit I don't want to know what he does but But like and that's cool Like it makes me feel good But then I'm like fuck this person now knows where I It's where I live Yeah

And then there's not that they're gonna do anything Cause like I assume like Most people aren't freaking maniac I see most people are normal Most people are pretty chill Yeah I hate people meet with me and my girlfriend Like me and my girlfriend

My girlfriend's super not like She's a very normal human being She's like not fucking My sense of humor The shit I do on internet She's like very much so detached from that But when I'm outside like In like fucking like Glendale

And then like somebody close with me and they make a fucking joke or they say something to me and it's like I'm with like people that are like not intact with that kind of shit I do it just feels like it just feels strange because then I have to like hey let me step away I got to say some real ignorant shit for a second give me a moment guys surely you're in that zone now surely you figured out some kind of oh I figured it out but it's still a formula to it's still a little weird though it's always gonna be a little weird because it's just not something that is normal I you know it's not the norm I guess it becomes normal and it's not that big of a deal when it happens it

Oh, hey, thanks, man. That shit doesn't make sense to me, like, logistically, where, okay, you have this many subscribers or whatever. And then I live in a city that has tens of millions of people. So I'm like, what are the odds? What are the eyes? What are the eyes? I'm going to fucking...

So, me being that... Thinking in that way, you know, I look like the worst shit possible when I go out. I have, like, I might grow my nails out and everything's gross. I'm, like, thinking that I'm not going to shake anyone's hand or anything. And then all of a sudden, like, somebody comes up and I'm like, fuck. I didn't. It's not, you don't think that's going to happen. And especially on like a level like that, like it's fucking weird.

It's where I imagine like say, I don't know how many like views total you have. So then that kind of increases your odds like more eyes have been on you. Yeah. But like I feel like I'm like, no one's fucking. But now I'm getting paranoid, bro. It gets tricky, man. Like when you count your subscribers down, like when you actually take into account like when you actually put like a human body to each of those numbers, it's actually fucking insane. It is like, that's like several, several football fields.

That is, several football. That's true. That's totally like counters like what I'm saying. And so, because that is a lot of fucking people. That's true. I don't know. I just feel, I'm just getting paranoid now, though, to be honest. Have you checked how many of you used, like lifetime you have recently?

It's, I forgot. I think it's like, it's not that much. Well, I mean, it is when you're outside of it. No, it's not that much. It's like, it's like 40 million or something. It's a lot. That's a big number. That's a big number.

But I imagine yours is probably like fucking. triple that or something. I'm sure there's like quadruple it's fucking like a lot of lot. But still there are people that have zero. That's very true. Even my stupid ass with fucking like two fucking videos on YouTube. It's like

well over a thousand and it scares the shit out of me. That is possible. Look at this this is what actually tripped me out and it kind of grounded me a little bit. I had a friend from high school. He's been doing YouTube for a couple years or whatever and I saw

his girlfriend post. This had to be like a year or two ago when he hit the 1,000 subscriber threshold. She was so proud of him. And I was like, oh, what the fuck? Like, it kind of like, the accomplishment,

the 1,000 people. And I was saying, I was like, Jesus, man. Like, when the, I was like, when was I had a,

I don't think I ever even had a time to even process a thousand. Because one video came out and then thousands of people poured in. So it wasn't even time to like reflect on that chin. I was like, wow.

That is a lot of, a thousand people is a lot of people. Dude, I remember when I freaked down when I hit 100. I remember I was like, I got 100 people. That's wild. Yeah. That's crazy. That's like a sizable auditorium.

And it is. Like, actually, that's already kind of huge. Yeah, it's like a bunch of people. I had a, I had a, I had a, I had a, I had a, I had a, and it was just, this was the one that, like, it was like the bane of my existence because I was actually talking about politics, like in depth. Yeah. And, and I just nuked that shit because I was like, do I fucking hate everything? So unfun. Oh, yeah.

It was, I was just mad. everything's stupid but yeah I think I got like I probably closer to 100 or something like that and some of my videos one of them had like over a thousand views and I was shit was fucking crazy to me

and like how was that even how did people even find this video the first video that I had that broke I made a video in like 2007 or 2008 it was like it was just a tutorial for like a halo thing where like how to lower your weapon

in halo so you could do like machinima and shit okay I just did like how to lower your weapon in Halo 3 and it got like, I think, 32,000 views in like three days or something. That would have broke my- That's like a lot. That's a ton of views. That would have broke my fucking face, dude.

Like, not even kidding. Like, that would be on like probably, at that time, it's probably on trending or something like that. Yeah. Because that's how many people like, it's hilarious. Like the shit that's like synonymous with like huge people on YouTube, back then you look back and it's like 10,000 subs. It's hilarious. It really. It's weird.

It's weird. It really is weird. It's to the point where I remember when my, because everyone, every once in a while, there's like a, the algorithm will punish you. Something happens. I think it's, there's some people that think it's intentional. I don't. I think it's a bug. I think they can't figure out how to get their shit like right.

And so there will be periods of time where you'll just bleed subscribers. Every time you upload, subs just start falling off. Like something happens. And you can't do anything about it. You can't control it. And this happened to me for most of 2019. It was like really upsetting. And then I remember seeing like a few people, I guess they were probably like haters or some shit.

It didn't matter like, oh, your fucking channels dying. And I think it was like some of the videos were still getting like 30,000 views. And I was thinking, we take a step back. I'm like, there's still a lot of fucking views. Like really. And I talked to one of my friends that she was, she blew up back in the day. And now her videos, her videos now barely crack over a thousand. And so it, when I was complaining about.

about the algorithm fucking my channel. And like, now it's pretty normal again where I can get anywhere from 16 to 100K and it's like that's usually in my range. Talking to her, like, I was like, I feel like an asshole. Yeah. It really does make you feel like it's just a complete asshole.

Like, I remember I put out of video, the Christmas recap thing. Yeah. And it hit like $250,000. Yeah. I was like, damn, this video failed. Like to me, that's like, no, it's got to be like 400K or else it doesn't count.

Yeah. What a fucking stupid. It's weird. For me, as to, idea of like this the thank you's you know it was like every one of those people as a person you know every one of those likes come from a person yeah so i see there's like a like a very like a thank you guys for even like even like me on like twitter like people that like view my fucking bullshit or like like like the tweets i think or like respond like it's thank you guys for like being

there and taking part in all the bullshit i like i put up it's cool and i do because like i be like at times you may forget you guys of people but like we do appreciate every one of you guys for doing that it's easy to just kind of like look at numbers yeah you get the touch focus on the numbers because it's for all intents and purposes when you're thinking business-wise you just have to look at things in a numbers capacity it's just like how you grow how you quantify yeah but like yeah like i think it's i think it's why i try to make it to vidcon or like it's why i try to make it to packs when i can yeah because i think that those are like really sobering moments where you're just like around people who like this this number now has like a face and like a personality

and it's like really rewarding and it's also humbling at the same time really gets you back to a normal I feel like people who don't do that will easily like kind of lose themselves yes and it's easy to do that it's easy to forget like forget or like

just become all consumed oh really because it's so much it's so much view it's so many people it's so many like I have this many thousands of people following me you know and it mentally puts you on a pedestal sometimes but like it's not intentionally it's just the fact that like it's that's a lot of people It unintentionally will happen

And one thing is I definitely always want to check myself Make sure I stay grounded And but there is something I always feel like there's some people That are meant to command or entertain A mass amount of people Like they're too charismatic to just like be

Oh whatever Yeah I definitely think you guys are two people I like very charismatic I was gonna say This is because I feel like I feel like I'd be a great producer Because I feel like I see people I'm like, I see like really great potential in you or something.

I did that way you mentioned, you name Drop Casara. When I stumbled upon her channel at like 19 subs, and she had a few videos up and I was like, dude, just chick's fucking hilarious. Like people need to know about her. Yeah. Like people need because they're going to respond. And then she started to get like an audience because I was like,

you can tell, you can feel it. And this is probably the nicest thing I'll ever say about you. Like, right? Like you, well, I guess nice and also me like, like, dude, what the fuck are you doing? You can, you, fucking are unanimously. People are like, this is one of the funniest people

I've ever fucking heard. I don't do. Like I die when I hear this guy rant and then he's just fucking what do you just jerk off? What do you do? What do you do? I am not what is this. What is this? A social media kind of person. I've become much more of one. You can be like... I become much more of a content like person that like deals

with like internet stuff. Hey, shut up for a second. All right. Yeah. Look, you know who's not on social media? Dave Chappelle. All right. That's not an excuse to be able to like, you know, just put some, even somebody can just like, hey, hey girlfriend, handle my shit. I'm just saying as an example. You are objectively funny. Yes. And I think if you streamed or something, that would be great.

Yeah. That would be huge for you. Yeah. You could stream and honestly, like, you would probably overtake me on Twitch, probably. Because I just don't really, I'm not good at streaming really at all. You fucking, you spend a lot of time playing video games. Why not just turn on the fucking camera? It's it's dude

I have to turn on the camera honestly You can just go on mic Oh sure It really it would be This is the thing Okay let me explain this to you guys Okay That is

How do I explain it That is like a Just another world It's like a parallel dimension That I just I've never Felt very comfortable And like that's why I like I love being Chris's videos

Because I guess it's like Snit of Kingston Bam I'm in Say some dumb shit Say some wild shit Then I'm out you know Yeah Like that's how I feel about it

And I hate it Because I get that shit All the time from like other fucking YouTubers, other people that are just like pretty big and they're like, oh dude, you're fucking hilarious. Like when I see that one, Jakey said I was funny, that shit fucked with my mind.

I was like, this guy's hilarious and they think I'm funny. And it's just strange to me because I don't really think I'm that funny, you know? And nobody does. Yeah, that's a good thing. And here's an interesting thing that happened a few weeks ago.

So Corey Taylor, one of the biggest musicians in the world, you know, he's a singer of Slipknot and Stone Sour. So he has a son named Griffin, right? Griffin hit me up, and he's like, dude, you three, like he was talking about us. I don't think he gives a fuck about any of my other content. But he's like, dude, he's fucking Tom Swinney and all that. He's so fucking funny.

Really? Yeah, and I'm- Slip-Not? That's hilarious. This guy, like, that's associated. And the funny thing is, it's like, I know who he is. He's like, hey, you know what my dad is and stuff, right? And I'm like, I fucking marked out when he followed me on Twitter. because I did like a little slip-knock cover

and I was like what what the fuck and like now there's a direct line and I know that and I know this guy has showed his dad Corey like aware of this like talent or the natural talent I would say because it's just

it just happens yeah and it's one of those things where it's like I'm not trying to fucking freak you out bro but it's one of those things that it's like dude fucking do do take that natural funniness and fucking just put it out there more. Here's the way

that I honestly look at things. There are a myriad of things that I could be doing, right? Like I could be an accountant or I could be like a fucking you know, whatever the fuck. Like literally anything. I think this particular job as unstable as it can

be and as like uncertain as it can be is at least the one thing that I don't foresee being easily replaceable. That's the thing for me. True. Or it's like, Automation is going to fuck shit up, like, for real. It's already fucking shit up, like, drastically.

It's already scaring me, and I'm, like, not automated at all. My life. You can't automate really a comedian. Yeah. Not yet. It's, I don't think it'll ever happen. It'll be a long-ass time before that's even possible. I think the only way that would happen is if everybody else,

there's, like, a synchronicity. Everybody fucking gets to this weird point where everybody is some type of connected, and all of a sudden we can watch some automated fucking bullshit. Well, comedy is based on personality. Yeah. And, like, you know, you could automate a lot of shit. You can't really, you can't convincingly automate personality. Yeah.

Like, no three AI in the next hundred years probably is going to be able to replicate this. No. What this, what the triangle that we have here. I gotcha. And I just think there's, like, a relative amount of security in that, even if, like, the platforms that are available to us right now are really shitty and really kind of, like, just all over the place. And you don't know what the hell you're doing most of the time. I think, not only is it just, like, super rewarding. super cool.

It's kind of a really solid bet, especially for people who are just objectively funny. I think you are objectively funny. And you should know that by now. I think you do. I don't think I'm not funny. I really don't. I mean, I think that I think that I can get a laugh out of people, but I don't think I'm hilarious.

When I think of hilarious, I think of like, I think like high on the totem pole. Dude, Dave Chappelle, Jerry Seinfeld, all these people, all the top comedians, have shows where they bomb completely. And it happens kind of more often than you think it does. They bomb constantly because that's how they get good. And a video will come out that I'll do and I'll be like, oh, that was not good.

You know, that was not good. You'll feel it. And then I'll feel it. I'll know it. I'll be like, all right, I'll do better next time. And that bust your balls and then you do good and then people like your stuff. And then like, it's just a cycle of getting better.

And it's a muscle. And I think that we've been flexing that muscle for so long now. It's been like four years of flexing this just like, let's be fun. constantly. There's not a point I don't think in the last four years where we haven't just laughed incessantly.

Yeah, honestly. Every single day. Yeah, it's weird. Every time one person comes in a room, it starts. Instantly funny. The second Jalen comes into the room, it's instantly funny. The second we start playing smash, it's instantly funny. Dude, that instantly. Yeah, that game. If we streamed

Smash Bros. That we would explode. We would fucking, you have you have to be here for one of those times. We played last night and it got to the that we were all having such a bad. I was crying because of how tired and upset I was. And it was just morbid shit being said. Like shit that like it's just who thought of that?

What kind of demon thought of that joke? Because you're just a terrible person. You pick Yoshi like a fucking psychopath. Yo, Yoshi's so great. He's so. The thing about Yoshi is that Yoshi in Canon is just the best friend ever. He's just the best friend. Yeah, you can kick him down a hole and he'll just die for you.

More loyal than a dog, dude. He's a really good friend. You know, he saved Mario when he was a fucking infant. Oh, yeah. He's a good dude. Got it? But in Smash, he's just, he's a fucking war, fucking, a war-ready monster. Ready to hurt anyone who opposes him.

It's fantastic. I mean, he's a dinosaur, right? Like, they'll fuck you up. He's a dinosaur with shoes, Derek. No boots. With boots. He's never taken those off. Dude, I wonder what it looks.

I wonder what his feet looked like. I don't think he has feet. I don't think he has feet. I think his feet or his boots. He just has boots. Develops in the egg and the fucking boots are a part of its DNA. The boots are the first thing that forms. The boots.

It just forms around the boots. I like that. So you fucking crack open a half, like, you know, an aborted fucking Yoshi. It's like boots in the fucking egg. That's how they make boots. Yeah. I've never thought to look at how you make boots on YouTube. And now, like.

Crack open a Yoshi egg just like four weeks early. You get boots. They're always the same size, though. So you got to be careful. I want to tell my kids that. I want to like, you know that stupid-ass meme that was going around? Of like, I'm going to tell my kids this is whatever. I want to legitimately do that.

Tell my kids, Yoshi's are the reasons why we have shoes. Yeah. My dad used to just lie to me for no reason. That's so cold. No, it's fun. It was what I would totally do. I would carry on that tradition. Yeah.

Like he would just tell me like, oh, yeah, you know, you know how they make Boleness wings, right? It's like, oh, no, it's like, oh, there's boneless chickens. He would tell me this. And I was young enough to be like, yeah, I'm sure, okay, Dad, you're the person who's supposed to be telling me how the world works. I believe you. Thank you. Thank you, caregiver. Thank you so much. And he'll be like, there's a boneless chicken farm and they, like, they farm the boneless chickens. And I was just like, yeah, that makes total sense. They're boneless wings.

They're just like wobbling. What are they, like, do they just lay there? They're like, they're like, kill them. The way he described them to me was that they're like snails kind of. Ah, that's where they, where they kind of like slink around. Yeah, they slither around. And he said that, like, there was, like, hot dog trees. You could, like, pick fresh hot dogs. That's sick.

I was like, yeah, dad, makes sense. I'm eight. Or, like, six or something. This planet doesn't make sense to me at all, but this is, thank you for clarifying what is for me. I appreciate it. I've been thinking about, like, what lies I'm going to tell my kids. I'm definitely. Already, I'm, like, prepped.

That's how I'm telling you the story about how my dad, like, pretended to lose me. Yeah. all the time oh wow well why would he do that why would anybody do that no good reason so we were like this was in yonkers on mcclain and we were like walking down to like i can't remember like to the pizza shop or to the pharmacy something i would get my toys at the pharmacy but that's a story for another

oh my god what was it was anything um righteous truth or righteous justice yeah right just like all these like bootleg things oh they had like real shit too they had like like i got all my dragon ball zi figures from that front of it was i remember it was lemak pharmacy i'm a clayn avenue in yonkers Like Inspector Gear? Do you have anything like that?

Yeah, Inspector Gear. What? It's just Richard Gear? No, like, but I was, no, so we were walking home from the far, from one of those things. And, like, my apartment, or our apartment at the time was, like, maybe like three blocks away. It wasn't that far. And I was running up ahead of my dad because I just knew where to go, and it wasn't that far. And then my dad was like, just shifted his eyes around, probably, I imagine is what he did.

And then he walked into some parlor and then just watched me from inside. And then I turned around and he was just gone. And I was like flipping out. I was like, where the fuck is my... I have bad separation of anxiety from that now, probably. But it was funny at the time for some reason. I remember laughing. Like, ah, ha, ha, ha.

You weren't laughing. I was frightened. I was crying, but I was laughing also. I was like, ha, dad, you're such a jokester. I got you, bitch. You're so funny, dad. You stupid kid. He's so easily.

think you just want to fuck with your kids because like there's no there's no there's never going to be another human being that you could just fuck with like that that's true you know that's true and people just like i don't know man people like people love people love playing pranks like i i convinced this is real i don't know if i've ever told the story on a podcast but i definitely told to everybody that i've met so far there was this kid that went to my catholic school who i convinced he was like three grades below me i convinced him that i was vegeta from an alternate reality and I was here to destroy the world. What?

I convinced him. He was thoroughly convinced. He would get me food from the vending machine to appease me like a god. That's awesome. He wouldn't pay for it. I would give him the money. I just didn't want to get up. Like I'm not that much of an asshole.

I'm not going to make this kid's probably poor family pay for my fucking ice cream. It was freaking fiend. You're a monster. So what happened, it started off as like a joke. Because I think like at the time, like you're a kid and you think you could do impressions well. And everybody's like, yeah, that was a good impression. And I did the Vigita impression or whatever.

And he was like, that's really good. And I was like, yeah. And I joked about it. It was like, yeah, I'm actually, you're going to do another. And it was like, really? And I was like, yeah. Like, I saw an opportunity to just have a lot. This went on for a year.

Oh, my God. A full year. That's not good, man. I feel bad for that kid. His name was Derek, actually. Oh, no shit. I'm not even kidding. It was the normal way, the different way, the D-R-D-R-E-K.

Yeah. And like, that poor kid. I wonder if he thinks about that. He must think about that. And I'm like, how stupid I must have been. I hope he knows who, like, he knows you're doing this and he's, and he listens to this. I hope he doesn't know yet. And he's just out somewhere terrified.

Like, when is he going to strike? Oh, like, still? I'm not there to appease him. I hope they're keeping him in check. I hope someone's getting his food from the vending machines because he's dangerous. Dude, we got to get you fucking Vegeta fucking cost to. You know what's fucked up? Is that, like, I said I would destroy the school.

And at the end of the year, the school closed down. Oh, so we thought it was you. So this is a very good, I hadn't seen him. But like, this is a pretty good possibility that he equates that. Dude, you fuck this kid's life up. That's just psychological damage that no one needs. He's probably in joke. He's probably in therapy right now because of this shit.

He probably really, he probably can't hold a steady relationship anymore because of you. He probably can't find love and all this shit. And his life is spiraling out of control. He probably hates Dragon Ball. Like he fucking gets triggered by this The the the caccarat game that just came out He freaks out and go to some fucking PTSD moment He sees Christopher Sabbath at like a at like a Walgreens or something

He hears him and he starts shelling up He starts shaking and oh my god Feminine product vile Start quaking in his boots Starts quaking in his Yoshi boots I'm gonna get a Yoshi tattoo that says I'm death Right off my fucking 4R If you do that I'll pay for it

Oh this is gonna happen Yo can you have like the akuma like or a one I yeah I'll fuck it I'll do it I'll do that Definitely I don't even fuck Have a tattoo you don't have a tattoo None yet They're kind of fun yeah honestly

You can get Kuma You get this little thing I was gonna get Yoshi with it's because After Yoshi beats the life out of people He does the akuma stands From fucking street fighter Because for some reason they thought Yeah

Give the friendliest dinosaur going to land, the death bringer stance. There's jokes that, because I want to start doing stand-up, right? And there's certain jokes that I have. I'm like, I don't know if I can say this. I don't know if I would get a laugh because I've had this one thing. And I can say here because I feel like it's just like chill. One thing that I always want to say is, like, you ever seen a girl that's so attractive,

she's so insanely hot that you kind of think like, like, sometimes I just, I kind of understand. Because you're just like, you just so. And I'm like, can I say, is that? Is that a little bit, like, is that just a little bit too? It might be a little bit too. That is, I'm going to, I'm going to be the one. I've said the most raunchy shit ever. But I think that's too far.

It needs to be as funny as it is offensive. Yeah, it has no, has to be more. More funny. The balance, I mean, I feel like there's, if I heard a comedian that I like say that, like say Tom Zagra, for example, if I heard him say, I would laugh my ass off. I would too. I would understand. I feel like I don't.

I feel like I wouldn't because it feels too easy. It's sometimes I enjoy a myriad of comedy and I feel like easy jokes too. A lot of times just a little just to open up, you know, like, oh, you know what this is, you know what type of show this is going to be. And then you kind of get masterful afterwards or something. The easiest joke that I've ever seen delivered perfectly was Chappelle on the most recent one, on his most recent. No, no, no, not that one.

It was sticks and stones, right? Is the new Dave Chappelle? I think that's right. I think so, yeah. he does this joke about the he does the I identify as which is like a really painfully overplayed joke on the internet especially

it's just like oh I identify as in Thai helicopter it's like uh huh funny funny yeah I get it's like we get it yeah but like the way he did it he was like if it happened to me you laugh wouldn't you that wouldn't be funny if it happened to me I think it would be what if what if it did what if I was what if I was Chinese

but but born in this nigger body that's not funny and for the rest of my life I had to go around making that face hey everybody I'm tiny and then I don't get mad stop making that face that's offensive what this is how I feel inside and it was just so funny it was so funny that show was actually offensive but hilarious it was literally well because it was like it exceeded it like went further than people would normally go with that joke so it was offensive but it was also just delivered so well he's a man He's really good. He's really good. I've come to really appreciate Dave Shubb. I didn't really like him back in the day. Oh, really? Yeah, because like I felt like a lot of his, a lot of his material was like, it was like race-based, but it was like obvious observations and just kind of like based on stereotypes a lot. Yeah. It just felt like, it felt like black people be like, you know?

That's what it felt like at the time. I don't know how accurate that is. That might just be like the way that I remembered it being. There was some, there was a lot of race-based. Yeah. It was very race-based, but like, it's still race-based. Like, he still does. a lot of that material, but it feels more textured than it used to. Like, I feel like his old stand-up is just, it's funny, but it's also just kind of I don't know, I don't know what it is about this new stuff that he's been doing.

But it's just, it feels really insightful. It is. I think it's always been insightful, but now it's just more experienced now to make it more insightful. Yeah, he feels like really wise. Yeah, yeah. When you listen to him. Big time. And I think I appreciate that probably the most about Dave Chappelle. Because, like, I don't think there's any other comedian that feels as

worldly or as or as um lived as lived there's no one that i can take a lot top of my head definitely not yeah even my favorite people like are just nowhere near that level of wise the only other person patten oswald he's patten oswald he's so funny he's one of the least funny people i know i was just he's a ratatooie based that's it he's rat i mean he looks like a literal rat so it makes sense no he voiced ratatoo i know but i'm saying it made sense because he looks like a rat he looks like i don't I don't think they picked him for his talent. They're like, hey, that guy looks like a fucking rat. Get him.

Yeah, I don't know. He's funny sometimes. I don't think he's a good comedian. Yeah, he's not like, I know he did that. What was that one with Kevin James? He did that show. Okay, Queens. Yeah, he did that.

So I'm sure he was like okay in that or something. He's on for a long time, right? He's funny when other people use him for like material. I was, I was just making a joke because he's so unfunified. Yeah, I understand. Yeah. I understand. He has a comedian sucks.

Like, but I don't know. I think anybody can be funny if they're given the right material. and they're directed in the right way? Uh-huh. I just saw, uh, uh, the, Robert Downey Jr. on the Joe Rogan's podcast, and I couldn't believe how unbelievably charismatic Robert Downey Jr.

Super charismatic. I couldn't, like, I've never, like, the way that Joe Rogan was laughing in that podcast is the way that he lasts when, like, his friend Joey Diaz is over. His, Joey Diaz is one of those people. He's like, our people. Robert Daniels is on the podcast, and fucking, I'm dying. It was like, wow, this guy's fucking,

You could do stand-up we want to do, which is- Which is disgusting to me Because he has so many other, like, amazing qualities to him. Like, oh, he has this one, too. Stand-up is heavily, like, there's a lot of stand-up that is charisma. Yeah, I think you have to be charismatic to be a stand-of-comedia. Yeah. Like, without a doubt.

Like, there's no... You couldn't be... Even if, even, like, people who are, like, kind of awkward have a certain level of, like, a different kind of charisma. Like, I've definitely seen, like, there was this one, chick, I can't remember her name. She got in trouble for some joke, but she didn't care, and then

nobody cared. But she has this, like, really, like, monotone kind of delivery, and she's very, like, meek. Uh-huh. But it worked super well for, like, every set that she did. She bodied this one, they were, like, doing this insult comic round. I think you showed me that, yeah. I showed it to you. And they were

just going back and forth on this insult comic round, and this one girl is just, like, constantly bashing this guy, and this guy's going for, like, you could tell he's, like, genuinely hurt by everything she's saying so he's like responding in like a really defensive way yeah and the last thing she says is like um Dave's Dave's Dave's mom actually died from not wearing a helmet in a motorcycle crash um she took a nasty spill she she she actually died the way Dave lives an unrecognizable road feature and the room just fucking die I was like but it was like

Like the just the delivery is all the same. It's like Mitch Hedberg almost. Okay. Where it's like it's just this very straight. Yeah. There's no like highs and lows. It's just consistently funny. Yeah.

I was dying, man. Dude, I, it's, I've thought about doing stand-up, but then I feel like I would just lose my mind doing it. Because I'd be like, I would just go on there and like, I would just say,

I would have to say, because like, I would get so nervous and I'm saying that I would just say something that I know I shouldn't say up there. Stand-up is weird. But it might get a laugh. And I'm like,

all right, jackpot. Stand-up is very different than just being funny on camera. It's like an entirely different skill set. That's one of the reasons why I haven't done it yet is because I don't feel like I haven't properly prepared to even step into that realm because I know how different it is. It's not like say, oh, I know people enjoy me. I'm pretty funny to these people, but it's like it's a holy fucking different animal.

And I could technically cheat and invite people that watch me to the show. But I want to go open mic. Yeah, yeah. cold, cold audience. They don't know and I want to give them my best shot and I haven't done that yet but I know you've experienced

with that shit, right? Yeah, I did a couple. I did like three open mics. Yeah. First one did really well. Second one did really terrible. Bombs. Horrendous.

And the third one was just kind of pretty okay. I don't think I did too bad. Okay. It's a completely different, it feels weird. Like, I don't think I'm good at it at all yet.

I think the first one I got really lucky because I had a really good crowd. Okay. And like, I had a really solid intro because I walked in and the mic stand was like super high because the last comedian I went was like super tall so I immediately got like a really

good like laugh just miming with the mic stand and so I was off on like a really good foot immediately so people liked me it's really very different like I'm taking a step back just so I could like work on it a little bit more but I want to do it again because it was like really cool yeah I've been crafting it's really cool making like a group of people

who don't know who you are laugh left that's like one of the most gratifying things I think it seems awesome yeah like I wouldn't mind doing a show where it's like Like it's just people that are fans. Yeah. But I feel like that would be more tailored to them. Yeah. So like it would be like a lot more inside joke heavy, a little bit more like, you know, bring swing up or whatever.

Yeah. And just do like a stupid. I mean, just react to some. Just react to videos. Yeah. It would be a great idea. I liked what, um, I remember, uh, that's what the H.D podcast tried to do. They did a live show.

And since everybody there, it was, it was like they were doing kind of, you know, bringing up stuff and having videos prepared on the projector and stuff. And it seemed like a good time. And they were going to do another one, but then there was complications with the venue. Because I was going to go to that. I don't know if you're going to go or something. Yeah. Yeah.

I was like, fuck yeah. I want to be a part of this experience. I want to experience this shit. Because ultimately, every person that I look up to barring like the rock or something or like say as like a mentor and like something, everyone else is a comedian. Everyone else is a stand of comic. And I'm just like, why haven't I tried to put my foot at this yet? Yeah.

And this is something that I've been thinking. thinking about for over a decade and I haven't even I haven't even written a full like five minutes I just have oh this would be a good joke and I haven't worked it out I haven't even attended it and it's like what the what the fuck am I doing and I really and I feel like I said this one time before that I think that I like the all the all the comics I watch now and stuff and all their podcasts they all kind of came up together and I was like well I feel like that's what we should be doing people like in our generation to like we're already we're having this podcast right now and it's like well Let's start hitting up open mics.

Let's start, like, building up towards something. Yeah, we should do. What's that? Zach has been telling me to talk to me about this, too. Yeah. Where Zach was like, we should just get together and do an open mic. Yeah. Like all of us?

I think that's a really good idea. That could be fun, yeah. I think that's a really good idea. I think that's exactly what I was saying. And then, like, because all the people, all the people I fucking love. All the people, there's, uh, Louis C.K., obviously, you know, has little problems. But Tom Seguera, fucking, there's a lot of people that are just, they all know each other.

They all fucking float around. Bill Burr, one of my favorite people ever. He floats around. Now he has a new podcast. He's always had his old podcast, but now he's a new podcast with his new Birk Kreischer.

And they all know each other. They're all friends. They're all starting. They're all fucking, and I was just like, damn, it's just like a cool little community. And then everybody's like, and the cool thing about that is,

you're going to get a little bit of a different flavor of everybody. But you also know that you're going to have a good time. Oh, whether I see Bill Burr, if I see Bill, um, Burt Kreischer if I see Tom Sugura or any of these fucking people

I'm like I know these people and they're And they're all like chill people I'm gonna have a good time And I like that Joe Rogan has this show called Joe Logan and Friends He does at the comedy store all the time Yeah and so he'll bring up all these fucking people That I'm like dude they're all friends and they're fucking pretty funny When they're together it's perfect

I can imagine rooms like how fucking hilarious the rooms would be You'd be like shit you just constantly laugh at I love the energy man There's something about being around other people It's like I understand why they do laugh tracks And sitcom sometimes because it sometimes does make you want to laugh. And then so being around other people

that are having a fucking great time you feed off that energy, man. Yeah, for sure. I love that. I had a get-together's in the house before where we were all just like fucking laughing and like a bunch of people like other like other content creators that come over

and we'd all just like shoot the breeze and just fucking laugh or ass with a bunch of shit that we'd make up. Yeah, for sure. Like anytime, anytime that I hang out with Gus, Gus Johnson, Eddie Burbank and Nakey Jakey is always just a fucking hilarious.

I imagine. Hilarious times. I imagine. Like it's never not funny. Yeah. Because everyone's just honest. on always. It's just such a fun environment to be in. And so the same thing it is

here, honestly. Honestly, yeah. Like anytime we're playing a video game, I feel like we're also kind of on. Yeah, we're all fucking like, because we're playing it. We're playing smash and we're like, but we're also thinking like what's, what's going to make, what's going to make somebody laugh here? Yeah. It's getting, it's gotten a little selfish though. We're getting to the point where we just want to make ourselves laugh, which is like

scary. It's like, that's like, that's like a sign. It's off. Jaylon will walk in, our other roommate will walk in, and he'll just say something that just isn't funny, but he'll deliver it in a funny in a funny way. then he'll laugh to himself and it'll make it hilarious. He came in the other day. He came in the other day and he said,

he walked in like super late. I think it was like 8 p.m. or something. We were playing something in the living room. And I was like, oh, hey, what's up, man? Oh, man, I cracked my skull. And he just leaned against the wall and stood silently. And I was like, what? And he started cracking the fuck up to himself.

So I feel like, I feel like that's the, I feel like that's the behavior of someone who legitimately cracked their skull. That's what I'm saying. That's what was so convincing about it. I guess we'll start wrapping it up because we've got, how long we're out here? We're at two hours and four minutes. It doesn't even feel that long. It was like a half an hour.

That's a good sign. Yeah, yeah. You wrap it up or you got any other questions or anything? I got a couple more questions here. Maybe we just bang out a couple more and then fuck off. Just a few more questions. A little agro, Drick. Dirk.

We got Chase Blauvelt. That's a fucking interesting name. Hey, Sweenis. What is your favorite class in D&D? Others feel free to answer as well. I don't play D&D because I'm not a nerd virgin. You, I am both, but leave me alone, okay? All right.

First and foremost, guys, we need to convince Chris. Chris would love Dungeons and Dragons. I don't know why he doesn't play it. is the same thing. He's like, oh, why don't you make videos? Why don't you play D&D? One is significantly easier. One makes money.

That's true. Yeah, that's the other one could make money. The other one could make money. It could make money. But one's a job that I have to maintain out of responsibility. That's true. But also, I don't know. I feel like Dungeons and Dragons just takes a lot of time.

It takes a lot of time, but it's always a good time. I'm sure it is. But I just have so much to do. I feel yeah. There's so much shit to do. I have two podcasts now. Yeah. You know, I have videos that I have to like upkeep that I'm just like not.

yeah that's a i just found um twitch i'm doing so much shit yeah you remember that fucking uh that app called ditty and then you would uh use it was a midi that you would just text and then it would say it so i just found one of you uh of that i made for you and um it was hilarious because like it ends with saying like um can't wait for a video in a month or two i was like laughing my ass off i was just checking it because i'm like that's so fucking that is so like such a staple of who you are people don't like, oh, it's that fucking guy that never makes videos. I saw on my wiki, it says infrequent uploader or something. I was like, holy shit.

It's canon. Anyway, good Lord, that was our episode for today. God help us all. I guess if for some reason you feel compelled to support VAT with which you just heard, obviously the links are Patreon.com slash the snark tank There's a nice little community over there

Yeah, already thank you guys But I'm jumping aboard And helping us out I really appreciate it Yeah, it's really honestly Like super cool How many people have jumped on Even just before we put out

Another episode Absolutely It's really sick If you're listening to this on iTunes also Leave us a nice review That actually kind of helps I know this is like boring housekeeping shit

But it needs to be said Because the world is competitive And if you don't compete You will die You will die a small child, cold and alone. We'll talk, baby. Yeah, the world will eat you up, swallow you. Keep you in there for a little bit, then you're out.

Right on the street. So obviously, the, so yeah, obviously Patreon.com slash a snark tank. $1 gets you early access to every episode. $5 gets you the ability to write in and have your questions, comments, ideas, topics, whatever the hell you want, read red on the show. And it's, that's it. I just want to thank some of the people who have donated a little bit more than that. people who are producers in my eyes.

We've got our first one, Alex Jones. Oh, wow. So thank you, Alex Jones, for making this show possible. Thank you so much for all you've done, Alex Jones. Artie, Dangle Blampy. Dangle Blampy. Dangle Blampy is a great name. Eric Piper, Carson Roth, King of what is that?

King of what? King of hap-what-the-fuck. Oh, King of haphazard. Richter 86 Nice Richter Thank you Rushanish Russianish

Ryan and Toby What is this Toby McFly Toby Schupeman Toby Schuptman Thank you all for donating to the higher tiers Really appreciate it

We're hoping to get this to a place Where we can start doing video content for you guys Yeah for sure That would be so great And it'd be sick But yeah that's the Stark Tank We'll see you next week for more of whatever the hell

this is. More garbage. Thank y'all. An acid trip of a podcast. That was a house kid. That was a dark place. That shit went everywhere.