The Snark Tank - #116: Can’t Yeet Them Babies No More

Episode Date: July 4, 2022

Sween is dead. We kinda talk about Roe v Wade and our new into moving forward is Kingpin moaning. https://www.patreon.com/TheSnarkTank Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

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and related heart risk. You shouldn't. Visit DetecttheSos.com today to learn more. By the way, he says he, you know, every time he says he's wired. What? There's no Ethernet cable here. Are you serious? There's one connecting the modem to the router, but there's no.

He's not, he's not jacked in? No, there's no, there's not even an Ethernet cable. It's so confused. Oh, my God. Are you fucking serious right now, dude I swear to God, like I have looked Because I had to do sacred in here And I was like, what the fuck

So he's just, yeah So he's just straight up on Wi-Fi And he's wondering why he has issues everyone's wrong Yeah, yeah I guess Cool Oh by the way, like so welcome to the snark tank Where I'm I'm

I'm broadcasting from Sweeney's abode Sweeney is sick now He was He left for Vegas last week And now he's sick So chances are he's dead Yeah, he got COVID now Because I got COVID in Vegas from the gross Vegas locals.

And, yeah. I'm good. I whip that shit to ask quick. That means I got it. So we'll see. Probably. Probably. In all likelihood.

But hey, you know, like, it was interesting because my lady, she didn't get sick at all. And, you know, we're in the same room. So it is an anomaly. It's kind of weird. Yeah, I don't know, man. I heard something that, like, if you have allergy onset asthma, it doesn't affect you. Like, you can't catch it, which is insane. Because I heard, I think, I think Justin Wang said that. And I was thinking back to, like, all the times that I thought I for

sure had COVID or was around people who had COVID and just didn't get it. Because I do have that. Like, I have allergy onset asthma. Like, it's been a while since it's been a problem because they don't run or move anymore. But I was thinking about it's like, hmm, that would explain a lot. Also, since I'm here, I thought I'd take it upon myself to kind of solve some mysteries that I'm sure some podcast listeners or podcast viewers specifically might be curious about. Like, why the fuck doesn't Sweeney close his bathroom door? Why is his toilet always in view? It's very, it's very fucking bizarre. And just this is going to be exclusively for the, for the video podcast, but it's,

It's going to be worth it, I promise. Look at this shit. Here we go. We're getting a nice tour of the... Oh, my God. Oh, okay. Now we all understand why he doesn't close the fucking door. God damn.

God, fucking... This man lives in a fucking Lego house. Oh, my God. For those of you who couldn't see that, believe me, check out the video. Because there's no way for me to explain it in the way that does it justice. His door is just a piece of wood that is just not. Why is it like that? And why doesn't it have a, like at least a circle that is carved into it to easily, you know, like for leverage to slide?

I wish, I wish to God I understood. Like, I don't know. This place is insane. It is sincerely very hot in here. Like actually, like every time he's ever complained about that, it is like the second I sat down to even set up, it was already like, I'm sweating. But he also has his setup in front of the window in California. So the son's just, the son is just cooking him as he sits here. Right.

So of course. That's cool. And does he not blast the AC or anything? He doesn't have an AC. There is no AC. Oh, there's no AC? There's an AC in the living room. It's a very similar situation to, like, a lot of apartments where, like, there's an AC in the main place, but in the rooms, it's just like a fan.

But in this case, there is no fan. So it's just like, it's just a box. Can't do that anymore, man. That's just barbaric to me now. I can't, I can't do it anymore. Yeah. Especially living out here in the desert where. Everything's so insulated and central air that you forget that you live in the desert.

You fucking forget. Like, I'm inside 70-something degrees chilling. And then I'm like, oh, yeah, it's fucking 115 outside. And my skin's on fire. I forget. Dude, Vegas, Nevada scares me the temperature of it. Like, I just, I don't even understand how it's possible. Like, it seems like a place that you could only visit.

You know, like Antarctica, where like how the fuck do you survive there? Like, and I guess it's like, yeah, when I was thinking about it, when I went to Vegas, no place that I ever went felt as hot as even remotely as hot as outside. Like even like, even like it was never hot indoors ever despite the fact that you are on basically Mars. And they, it's because they need to other than they'll or else they'll fucking die. My phone exploded in Vegas because it was like 117 degrees. so like normal people don't stand a chance in that fucking heat. It's weird. It's weird.

I always tell people that you're only going to spend minutes at a time outside if that because you're just going to be, say you work out a job. You're going to be in your office. You go to a store. You're going to be in there the entire time. It's really just the walk to and from your car. That death, if you can handle that, you'll be okay. Some people can't handle that. And, bro, let me tell you, there are some people that I'm going to, I don't want to turn.

turned into some weirdo with a gun that wants to blow people away. But I have seen multiple times already midday people walking their dogs outside. That's crazy. And I'm like, that's crazy in Los Angeles where it's not, where it's not 115 degrees. Dude, it's mind boggling. And the fuck the thing about the dogs, they're so excited to be outside that they'll just take it. You know, they'll take the pain. and I'm like, I want to, like, I don't, I'm trying so hard not to turn into that person

because I'm like, I, I want to, you know, I had my whole thing, my whole rant about guns before. I'm like, I don't get rid of them. And no, and this, I'm like, dude, I'm turning into a patriot. I'm quaker fucking outfit on. I'm like, I'll get a musket and blow these motherfuckers away, dude. And be like second amendment. They're melting their fucking, they're melting their dog. Like every dog in Vegas, their paw prance.

are just a flat circle because their because their hands have just melted into this into this fucking frying pan looking thing

like it's so sad I get annoyed seeing that like again in places that are not nearly as as fucking sweltering as Vegas so like just

right oh my god they should everybody who does that should be drawn and quartered by dogs they should be

they should have like they should have like almost like like what's the iditarod like the fucking the snow dogs who pull the sleigh

pull the what the fuck is it it's not slay or but it is also like fucking whatever just a bunch of dogs tied to each limb run in separate directions

and just like torn apart like a like one of those art mannequins that people use for posing I wouldn't mind that even a little bit like I know mercy for those people 100% like there's only sometimes

I don't don't like say something because you can tell those people are psychotic and you're like all right it's not worth it's not it's not worth getting killed over shot over this man's probably been yeah this man has that sniper glint in his eye like every time he looks at you you get that fucking big glare that lets you know you're going to die soon you don't want to deal with those people yeah fuck no but but yeah also I also you know I want to say sorry for the the last episode and to the patrons like we just we all it shit got weird I got every yeah everything everything that could have possibly got went wrong went wrong we had

internet problems where we me and Sweeney kept disconnecting from the same call uh then when we just had to abandon the episode like middle the way through it's like we'll record it later and then Sweeney left to Vegas and then I had to record it and then I uploaded it to the wrong drive we're We all fucked up, like, every single, and now Sweeney's sick. So, like, he's probably dead. He's probably a permanent loser on this podcast. He's not going to come back. Yeah.

We could do the next episode live at his funeral. Hell yeah, dude. Just fucking slap his corpse. You know, just kind of abuse him a little bit. We could do that. Because I'm sure he'll have open casket. He'll have open casket. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

And we could do that thing. We do that thing where we're like, oh, no, no, no, no, no, we do the, you know, make him speak, puppet him. We should get him a, we should get him a casket that's like five foot and length. And then we have to, fold him in.

Stop him in there. That is so, that's so barbett. That's like one of the most barbaric things I've ever heard and it doesn't hurt anyone. It's like just a dead body. But just the idea of like, I feel like, what the fuck movie was that?

It was some show or like some, something that I saw once. Oh, oh, it was, it was, well, it was in. Castlevania as well where he like shoves Trevor like shoves

um, bends his leg down to fucking Oh right, right, yeah. But like I swear to God I've seen that shit in other things that it like fucks me up. It's so gross. But but yeah, fucking,

man, a lot. And you know what's funny about this, by the way? When we recorded that first, last week's episode, the first time we sat to record it when I was outside and Sweeney was inside and we were doing a little gimmicky little show. We were, we literally, we explicitly said nothing happened this week, but I bet tomorrow

something's going to happen. And of course, like the next day, Rovi Wade got overturned and the fucking world ignited. And of course, because we're cursed. Like, it's such a cursed. Not only was the episode late, but like it was already, like, what a double fucking whammy on that. But so that did happen. lots of interesting people have taken to the internet

to voice very confusing opinions I think there's this one lady specifically that caught my eye this Lauren Bobbert person who I think I'm not saying this is a fact but I'm convinced that I heard some story at some point recently that she used to be like an escort and now she's a and now she's like a conservative kind of

talking head uh unconfirmed but yeah I've heard I've heard that too I've heard that too I have heard that I have heard that don't take it I saw some interesting pictures I will say this I will say this before you go any further

I saw some pictures that now because this isn't proof there are some pictures of her on this of this website called explore talent Now, Explore Talent, anybody who tried to be an actor is aware of Explored Talent. Because Explore Talent is this shitty fucking website that even possibly me might have a profile still on there from when I used to do background acting back in the day. It might still be there. I don't know if I nuked it or not.

I don't remember. But like pretty much anyone who was involved with central casting or any of that dumb bullshit that you would go to Burbank or you go somewhere in New York. and there was like those two fucking main places. So she was involved with some shit, but she also had some other weird stuff going on, which I wouldn't doubt it because all of these people always get caught doing something silly.

Yeah, yeah. You know, they always... Yeah, it's like the anti-gay politicians who like gobble cock and in secret. Stealth gaze. Lap it up. It's the stealth gaze, the metal queer solids

who just like, who just sit in the... Who just sit in the... It's like, oh, I don't suck dick, and then they fucking go into the... Go into that bathroom with the fucked door and do all sorts of shit. Sucking on some solid snakes, man. Yeah, and also, and also there's like, there's also, by the way, there's also, and I say this explicitly because I want to distinguish between principal and just people pushing for shit that is just their team.

There's a, there are a lot of Republican officials who have absolutely paid for abortions under the table. This is absolutely a thing. of course So, you know, when you're listening to politicians specifically, don't fucking You gotta be aware of that shit You know That's all I'm gonna say about it

I feel like that's like rule number one For like politicians that Even the ones you like Are probably Bullshitting about something Because it's just all about You know, the narrative Yeah

I don't know who this is This lady is I can't remember her name But she's against like the the trans panic the drag grooming narratives stuff that's going on yeah and she on her Instagram do you know what I'm talking about who you know what this girl Barbara not I don't think I don't think it's the same person

hmm it's somebody that's probably very similar but someone was like oh going to drag shows and saying this is how I do my makeup and stuff and then it turns out this person now is all against it all like oh that stuff spooky We need to do something about it. It's like one of those things. It's like, it's always that. It's like Jordan Peterson. Did you see that picture of him?

No. Is that picture of Jordan Peterson in drag? Or like his, his, his, he's not in a suit. He's not, he's not, he's not, it's just his makeup. He's in drag makeup. Oh. His, his daughter made him all glamour. You know what I'm saying?

Just kind of showing the evolution of these people were they didn't have a problem with this stuff before. And then now that it's like hot, it's like hot. It's like hot top. It's like hot-ticket shit. All of a sudden, now it's like, this is the worst shit ever. Well, the thing, too, is, like, I will say the internet makes it very easy because, like, the internet highlights, like, literally the worst people. Like, when you think about, when you think about even just something like abortion, which, like, I don't know, like, I'm pro-choice.

I think that's pretty fucking, that's been clear. Like, I've never lied about that. I've been pretty consistent about that. But, like, every time you see people, like, arguing on the internet about pro-choice stuff, it's usually, like, every now and again, you'll see, like, one picture of some girl who's like, I'm. I've had 31 abortions and I love it. And it's like, that's not the overwhelming majority of people. Like, I don't even, you know what I mean? It's like, it's the worst type of person to then just exist.

And then it's like, oh, that's everybody. And I think that exists for like every single possible stance that anybody can have. Like, even the drag show stuff. Like, look, I've been to, I've been to a few drag shows and they're really fucking mundane and tame. And also just the idea of like drag in general is not new. or surprising fucking Bugs Bunny has spent the last like 60 years in drag and he was on children he was a children's icon

you know and kissing dudes yeah literally literally fucking but like even just like Mrs. Doubtfire and shit like this is like Eddie Eddie Murphy and like this isn't like drag drag is not I mean that's not exactly drag I know drag is like

specific drag culture is its own thing but like the idea of like that type of entertainment is not like brand new Satanist propaganda. It's not like, it's not new wokeism or whatever the fuck people are saying. But, but I, but like every now and again, I'll see somebody who's like, oh, these drag shows are fucked. And then it's like the worst possible one. You know, the worst conceivable version of a drag show that happens like maybe like, like, I don't know, like one to two percent of the time.

Or like some like random naked bald man in the street twerking in front of like a, you know, like it's just, it's literally the worst people who by the way, who by the way I have never seen. Like I've been to these things. I've walked past them. I'm a city person. Like I've existed in cities for a long fucking time. I've seen a lot of things. Most of them on the subway. But, you know, this is not the overwhelming majority of people who think drag shows are fine.

You know, I just feel like everybody's just, like, sucked into these extremes by, like, the worst possible caricature of something that does exist, but doesn't really speak for... It doesn't represent anything. No, yeah. It's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, people get frustrated when I talk about, like, pro-life people because it's like, oh. And by the way, I've never said... I'm not going to get into that. But, like, whenever I bring up pro-life stuff, like, it's like, oh, you just think we're all religious nut jobs or whatever. It's like, no, I think some of you just...

genuinely believe that life begins at a certain point. And you think that killing... You do genuinely believe that that's killing a baby. And I do think that it makes sense that you would be angry about that. Like, that makes sense to me. If you believe that. I personally can't understand how you think that. Just because it's...

You don't have a fetus. you have a baby like you don't go hey come see the fetus you don't have a fetus shower like you very clearly like otherize a fetus before it's a baby even as a pro-life person

you're just like that's not a fucking baby yet yes just like my cum isn't a baby yet right you know it's like yeah I don't understand the I don't understand the people

who think that without religion that's the one that confuses that is confusing I understand the religious people even though, and I've pointed this out on Twitter, and of course people get upset about this, but it's just a very true thing. I used to be a religious person as a kid. I didn't understand most of what I was being taught because it's so wacky. I remember fully just being off board. I still considered myself a Christian around 10, 11 years old, but I remember just being kind of totally off board when it was time to dunk on Harry Potter.

the first Harry Potter movie was coming out. Oh my God. Did you go to a church? This shit's the devil. And I was like, I can't listen to this shit anymore. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. You went to an anti-Hary Potter church? So I went to a Southern Baptist church.

I only went to church when I'd go visit my grandma. And they're all Southern Baptist. And those church is hilarious. My friends would always beg me to take them. But I'm like, no, you're going to be too disrespectful because it's just funny. These motherfuckers, they fucking do circle pits harder than a punk show. Like some of their music's faster. they're fucking and the pastor

it's funny the way you know how they all praise the Lord yeah yeah yeah we're gonna do this and it's funny to me like it's not like when I hearing the way that he's speaking or the way that they speak like I just I tried not to laugh it's a kid

it is amusing delivery like like they have to know that and I think they do know that on some level they do know it's like it's because it's fun for people to be involved in that yeah because I went a Catholic church and my fucking God. Like there's, I can't even explain to you

how if you want, if you don't want your kids to be religious, just take them to Catholic Church. Like it is, it is the most miserable, boring fucking experience. Just like, just like, and so Jesus wept and then they said, let's join me in prayer.

And then they're like, Amen. Amen. And it's like these, these fucking, It's terrifying, honestly. Like, in retrospect, when I think about it, I'm like, fuck me, dude. I'm glad we stopped going when my parents just got too lazy to drive. But maybe that would have gotten me to believe longer.

Do you think so? Because the theatrics of the theatrics of the shit that I was doing. Because I went to a few, my, my, my, my mom's partner, my mom's partner sister, I don't know what I would call that. But we would go to her church. She went to a Calvary challenge. Now that's just white church. That's Ned Flanders church. Yeah, yeah.

And so they would just sing acoustic, Open your eyes to my heart lord, or whatever the fuck. Yeah, they would just sing songs like that all day. And it was like the most milk toast. One time they brought in a rap group called the Eternal Tribe.

And it was just all like, they would just steal people's beats. And then like just, and then just be like, are you jeed up? Like, are you got to be jeed up? You got it up, I guess. And it was, it was.

How does that work? So if you're a rap, if you're a church rap group, do you make money? Does the church pay you? I guess they have to, they probably give them money for those gigs. Yeah. And I did, I may still have their demo on a cassette tape. Oh my God. Because this was far enough away to where, yeah, cassette tapes were still being used.

You have to find that. I have a machine that digitizes cassette tapes. I finally bought one of those motherfuckers that I have not converted anything yet. It's cool. It's just been sitting around. I learned how to do that in college because when I went to film school, we were still editing on tape. I went to, by the way, this was 2011. Oh, it's awesome.

But like we learned how to like, oh, we recorded on JBC camcorders, like big ass fucking JBC camcorders that you had to hold with two hands. And there was like a tape that you would slide in and that you would. take the tape and like record it onto a fucking file. It's insane. But that if you could find that demo, that would be amazing. I might, I, I know where most of my tapes are. It's the only purple tape that I own. So it would be very easy to fucking find.

And this was fascinating going to different churches and seeing the different perspectives and point of views. Yeah. And a rap, a God rap group that was just, I'm like, I know all of these beats. These aren't your guys's songs. Why are you singing about Jesus on The Chronic? Basically, it was basically like that. Dude, this is a very huge aside, but I saw this video on TikTok that I feel like I have to talk about.

Because I was talking about really, really like goofy church music and specifically church rap got me thinking about this. Do you know this guy, I think it's like, his name is Jack Novak or something? He's on TikTok and he made this, he made this video, this song called I Want to Be the Next S&L cast member. Have you seen this? I wish I thought about it. I wish I sent it to you beforehand because it's fucking, we can't talk about it now if you, if you haven't seen it. But like, it is, look up. I want to be the next SNL cast member.

I have never seen a more cringe-inducing thing. It's like if Hamilton was profoundly white. Like, it is, it is, it is, it is, it is wider than weird Al. It is, it is the weirdest fucking thing I've ever seen. Because it's just like, so this is like unironic. It's unironic. It's a dude who's like, I'm on TikTok and he's like, what do you say? I want to be the next SNL cast member.

And here's why I should be a contender. Hey there, Lord Michaels. And it just does like a lot. It's like this song, but it's like it's shit. And he's just making all these like horrific. And he's like, I know the heat's on and I know you're feeling it. But I've been making TikToks and with comedy songs. I've been killing it.

And like, but it's the, it's so bad. It is so bad. Like, it's one of the reasons why I can't do. I've been trying to do TikTok while I've been in Los Angeles because I can't really do YouTube stuff as much. Not as not in full anyway I can't like edit and film and write out here And put something out. So I've just been like making TikToks

And like I've been spending a lot of time on the app And it's just I don't know what the fuck that app is man Like it's It's I try dude I try with that app It just doesn't work for me What do you do music stuff on it though right

So I'll post clips trying to promote my music on there But mostly I just I'll post like funny shit I'll edit something real quick That I stumble upon or I have like an old library of stuff that is just, this isn't on TikTok. This is stuff that I've discovered so long ago. Yeah, yeah.

And for example, there was one of this Mexican dude crying, drinking a beer in the rain. And then he just, he just screams, caviota. Like, he's listening to Vicente Fernandez. He's just so sad. You just broke up with his girl or whatever. And it's like a really funny clip of just being overdramatic. Like a real clip.

It's like a real, I personally know. Mexican, my friends, like siblings that do shit like that. They get all up in their feelings to listen to Vicente Fernandez and just fucking drink themselves and start crying and shit. And I posted it on Instagram,

went over well, I posted it on Twitter. I'm gonna, I post it on TikTok. I can't even remember how absurd what it got banned for. It was something, it, uh,

let's see. Ah, damn it, I finally deleted, never mind. It got, it was, it was like hateful.

It was like, it was like some hateful, it was, there was nothing it was nothing hateful about it there was nothing every time i try to post something that like does well on instagram for example it it just gets flagged for oh yeah yeah yeah my my favorite things that i've made on ticot all are like age gated or like like there's like some community guidelines thing where like i just like and they were just like oh you can't say kill which is why by the way a lot of people say unalive on ticot and i hate it i fucking hate it it it reminded me of

like, it reminded me of years ago, years ago when I would watch like, back when I was like, I would tune into like certain people. Like I'd be like, oh, what's the quartering doing? And I'd be like, what the fuck is he doing? And I'd check out, and he'd be reading an article about like some fucked heinous shit. And he'd be like, well, it looks like, uh, it looks like, uh, it looks like, uh, this person was, uh, force sleep kissed or something. It'd be, you know what I mean?

It would be like some terrible way to censor like the R word or like anything else. And I'm just like, what the fuck is going on? Unalive? Yeah, that one's, that one's, it sounds so stupid. It's, yeah. It's just kill. Just say kill. It kill isn't even like a bad word.

Like you could kill the lights, you know? Yeah. It's not, it's not that bad. It's, it's fucking FCC shit, man. It's like, they didn't want you to say that in kid shows. so instead they would want you to say destroy. Which destroy is technically worse. Oh yeah.

Like if you destroyed something versus killing it. Yeah. If there was a... You're like really decimated. Yeah. Like if you think of like, oh, what happened in that school? Oh, mass destruction. Like that's not exactly like, that's kind of awful to destroy.

I love that though. Like especially in like the 90s like Spider-Man the animated series, which I've just been on a kick lately just because it's that that clip of that clip of kingpin there's a clip of kingpin trying to climb a ladder and he just makes this horrific noise I think we talked about it but I think that episode got fucked no so we didn't

we talked about it and I and not not the last episode that not 114 114 I didn't even put in the intro I literally the clip the intro to the podcast is that fucking clip wait did anyone say anything?

Why does it start that way? We should start it. Somebody mentioned something on Twitter. You know what? The theme song's done. That's our... Just start to... Yeah, that's our theme from now on.

It's going to be like a clip of King... That clip of Kingpin orgasming on the ladder. I am 1,000% on board. Yeah, yeah. Like, I'm not like... I'm not even fucking joking. That is my favorite thing I have seen in years. This is...

And I got to tell you, man. And I know we bring... briefly talked about this before. I am shocked. I never noticed this. I'm fucking... I have seen this series multiple times.

I remember when it... Go ahead. No, me too. I don't remember this at all. But it's so weird because it's so objectively funny that like I find it's so difficult to believe that I could have sat through

this show before and not thought it was funny. But then I... But then you know what I was thinking of? And this is kind of interesting. We're like... The context that we saw that... show in, like all the way through, was, like, the last time, when was the last time you saw that show, like, all the way through?

Um, all the way through, I think it was 2012, uh, because it ended up on Netflix and then I watched it. So it's been a while. But that's like, that was like, one run through. And then before that, it was probably like in the fucking, you know, early 2000s. Yeah. So, like, the context, and this is kind of interesting because I was, I was thinking about it. The, the context of finding something funny during that time you couldn't just watch it again. You know what I mean?

Like you couldn't be like, oh, that was hilarious. Let me Google that real quick or like watch that YouTube clip because it was hilarious and then just repeat it and repeat it just so you could really hammer in how funny it was.

You couldn't like send it to your friends instantly and then get their immediate reaction to like how stupid. So like I feel like it was funny but we were just like, oh, that's funny. And then we just, we didn't think about doing anything with it because we couldn't. Yeah, right. Like, I feel like that's genuinely, because now when something funny, when I see something funny,

now I'm, I save it. I send it to like a ton of people. I fucking, I'll tweet it out or something. I'll watch it like a million times. Until it's not funny anymore, but that's, that shit is still fucking hilarious. It's so good. As a matter of fact, us, when I posted. that clip on Twitter.

Somebody replied with a video, like it's essentially a YouTube poop that I've never seen before. It's called Kingpin's Origin, but everything is a product of his weight. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. It's so fucking good. It's so good.

He's like, he's like, I tried to gain weight. I failed because of my weight. That video is so good. Spider-Man, the animated series is a golden gift, man. Unironically, like sincerely, because it's funny,

but it's also sincerely good. Like, I mean, The ending's a bit, you know, that last arc with like all those like heroes from the 40s or whatever. That kind of sucks. I still argue that the show didn't end because it's not over. It didn't fucking solve what happened to Mary Jade. Did the X-Men 90s show get a finale? I don't know.

And that's another series that I've seen enough. But now I need to watch it again as a full above 25 adult. and really absorb it. I need to absorb the show. You know what? I'm finally going to get Disney Plus. I'm finally going to fucking do it. No, just...

I've been put... I'll give you my... I've been putting it off. I'll give you my password. Like, don't do it. All right, that'll work. Yeah, don't work. Yeah, don't work.

I was going to ask on Twitter, is any of the Disney... No, no, not Disney. Any of the Marvel or Star Wars shows worth watching on Disney. I mean, I don't know. Like, I'm not a Star Wars show. person so I couldn't tell you. I watched a little bit of Obi-Wan. What do you think of it?

I feel like I like Hayden Christensen and Ewan McGregor as those characters. So like that the last bit of it where they had like character stuff was cool. But in the beginning like the first four episodes are kind of awful. Like they're just kind of like it's just really

How many episodes are there? There's six. And so most of it. Most of it is fucking... Most of it is just kind of like, all right. Like, it's, like, there's this, there's this really fucking horrific scene where child Leah is, like, running, like, she's trying, she's, like, escaping from people who are trying to capture her or something.

And she's running through the woods. But this is, like, four-year-old Leah. Like, she's so small. Her, she, she still runs, like, like, the Chucky doll. so it's insane that full-grown aliens and mercenaries can't catch her

like there's so many She gets away She gets away She leads them on a chase that makes so little sense It's ridiculous Like she's running through the woods And she's doing the This run

That You know like the toddler run Where they're like Yeah Their limbs are excluded To the side She's doing that And

It's really bad But the last part of it, like the last big, you know, Vader versus Obi-Wan stuff, I think it's actually kind of cool as somebody who doesn't care about Star Wars at all. But it just feels like that show feels like a movie to me. I know that's not like a... That's not a unique opinion. I think I was watching Red Leder Media and they also feel the same way.

Where like it feels like a six-episode show that was made out of... It's like a stretched out movie. If that makes sense. see. Like, it feels like the last two episodes are the third act. But it's like, it's too long to be a... I don't know. They just stretch out things for way too long.

It could have just been like a Rogue One type of thing? Yeah, I kind of like... They definitely could... You could edit that movie easily into like two hours and 20 minutes, like surely. But anyway, I'm sure Sweeney loves that opinion. Sweeney loves it. He loves everything. It's Star Wars.

but and I envy that sincerely like I wish I had anything that I cared about that much anymore I don't like it's all about I mean every anything that I like really love was so long ago you know yeah I haven't had anything recent where I'm like that was so fucking great

yeah I mean okay I'll be fair be fair I really did enjoy yeah and I know you did too you really enjoy Castlevania yeah I was actually I actually was bum. It made sense that it's over, but I was also disappointed that it was over. I was, I was happy that it was over because it was like, yes, yes, you can't fuck this up anymore. It's safe. Oh, okay. Fair enough. Fair enough. It's not, we're not going to have a game of throne

situation where like, oh, it's season 10 and it's, you know what I mean? Like, or like, oh, it's season eight or whatever, and it sucks. And it just ruins everything that came before it. But like, everything that I liked before, like fucking, I don't know, like, I don't, I can't care about the Halo story anymore. It's all fucked. Like, it's, it's fucked up. Like, I like the game still, but like that story is just meaningless to me after a certain point. Like, it's over. And I think of other things, like, Dragon Ball that I used to love. And then it's like, oh, here's Dragon Ball Super and they're still fucking transforming. And I'm just like, oh, my God. Please.

I thought it was done, dude. I thought Super was done. But they're just still doing it. It's, it. They're just getting started, man. Akira Toriyama is going to be like 110. Did you see the Mega-64 fucking, the boo saga in five minutes? No. They got fucking, they got fucking Hideo Kojima in that video. It's insane. It is like, it's at the end when everybody's raising their hands for the spirit bomb and all these like random people. And it's so bizarre because it's like Ethan Klein and Hideo Kojima and like just like a fucking baffling a array of people.

Jack's films and probably, I don't know, Joe Biden probably was in it. Although they probably just got footage of him raising his hands to the sky because he didn't understand what the sun was. What was that? What is this? I don't understand what, is this, is this corn pop? Is this corn pop's magic weapon trying to defeat me? Corn pops back.

He's, he started a fire in the sky. And it comes every day this fire. that he started. We got to get this shit under wraps. What was that thing? He said like America America can be defined

with only one word. Can I say, can I say the hard R? Because I, is that, is that, is that good? Is that good? I want Boogie 2-988

and Ralph to fight to the death. I want front row seats. I would fucking die if I if I heard

the president of the United States announced something so obscured to the vast majority of

the world I need Boogie 2988 and Ethan Ralph to fight to box each other

to death it's funny though because it's like that impression of him isn't even accurate anymore

because he's aged so much in the last two years Like, because he now he sounds more like, oh, what are we doing out here? We got Boogie 2949.

And we got Ethan Ralph from the Ralph's grocery chain and they're going to fight to the death outside of a Denny's. And then he's falling off of bikes. I don't even know, man.

He's fucking doing like bunny hops and like, uh, fucking tailwips and shit. And he's like eating, eating, he was a good effort though you know he was on the tailpipe he was like he was on the pipe he was on a half pipe and he you know he kind of botched a trick but hey a forever a for effort a for effort yeah Joe Biden's pro it's Joe Biden's pro skater and it's him on a fucking bmx bike it's a game that's all it's a game that's just Joe Biden on a bike in the whole set it's like it's like it's just like Tony Hawk but it's BMX except you can't succeed you can't land a trick he always he will always fall. He always fails. No matter what.

There's no animation for successfully landing a trick. So it's all, no matter how well you do. You fucking successfully grind an entire pool. And then you fucking just fall off your bike right after. Yeah, you just tumble. Tumble into the ground. Oh, my God. I'd pay, I'd pay 20 bucks for that game.

I'd fucking, I'd shoot somebody 20 bucks to like, if they just animated. Even if it's just like PS2 graphics, just whip it up real quick. Oh, yeah, yeah. And make Joe Biden's pro skater. Oh, yeah. I'm sure there's probably like some clever wordplay that you could, that I'm not clever enough to think of right now that you could worm in there. Right, exactly.

You know, but just figure it out. And it'll be. We can sell a lot of, a lot of copies by having, like, say, like, colon, let's go Brandon or something. Yeah, yeah, yeah. All these good, all these people will fucking buy it and shit. Like, oh, this is hilarious, man. he's just making fun of that's just to own the limbs

they'll fucking be can play this game would be so good it's so sad how easy it is to just like milk people for money

you know what I mean like like in a way that's so insincere like because I did you see the recent I mean maybe you did maybe you didn't it's kind of exploded

in the last like day or two but like there was this dude who got fucking fired from a job because he went into a New York bodegg and he was like I can't find the eggs No

What? He went into a New York Portaegan He was like I don't fucking understand This shit There's like no food anywhere It's a food desert

There's just a bunch of these corner stores I'm looking for Where's the whole foods man And like It's just like he exuded such douche energy It's like There's a point where he's like Where's the bread

And his his camera literally like Pans over the bread Like it's but it's not a joke Like he sincerely is just like I don't know what the fuck to do And he's like in the Bronx And he's like I'm wearing

I'm wearing my NWACP shirt, so these people vibe with me. And just like, fucking just... Who is this guy? I don't know, some fucking guy. But he was like in New York and like, basically they reached a bunch of people got like really butt hurt about it. And they reached out to like his company and then they fired him. And everybody was treating it.

And everybody was treating it like it was like this massive human rights abuse. But like I was just thinking like, first of all, I was already like, you can't find food in a bodega? Like how that's such an easy thing to... Beside that, the fact that he got fired for something so stupid, that to me, like, he's going to be rich in like a month and a half. You know what I mean? Like, because he's going to be like, they fucking canceled me over this. And then like a bunch of people are going to, you know what I mean? It's so simple.

Kyle Rittenhouse has a video game and he killed people. You know what I mean? I just saw that, that turkey shooter thing. Yeah. And I'm not even saying, like, I don't even like, look, lucky him they were two convicted pedophiles. Like, sincerely. like he really lucked out on that but I don't even care like what you think about that

like if you agree or disagree he's like oh Kyle I shouldn't have been there like oh he's an American hero like fuck I think it's all insane but but the fact that he killed people and he has a video game now and he's like selling like probably like a ton of copies of it this guy who got fired for

not finding food in a bodega dude this guy's going to be fine. Like, this guy is going to be so fine. It's ridiculous. Yeah, he'll be on, um... Yeah, he'll be on some... He'll be on some show. I don't know.

Crowder. He'll be on someone's show. He'll be on someone's show. Absolutely. Like, he'll be on, um, Tucker Carlson. Mark my word. Oh, man. Oh, for sure.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's like, you, you went to one of the most crime-ridden shit holes in the world. And they, they crucified you, didn't they? Why? Why did they do that? And like, and yeah, he's going to be like, well, Tucker, I don't know, but you can, you can find out more about my story at fucking, I don't know, whatever.org or whatever dot com. Yeah, and it's just like this, and a bunch of people, like, and I joked about it on Twitter and people got mad at me, but it's just like, dude, this isn't 2015 anymore. Like, like, if I'm a grunt working at a company that very clearly doesn't care about me, by the way, like he should very, you should know this by now if you've spent any time working, that it would give a,

shit about you, they'll fire you for fucking nothing. If this was 20, if this was 2014 or 2015 and this dude lost his job for that, that's, I would be like, what the fuck? That's so stupid. And it is stupid. And I would be genuinely worried for him because that's like such a shitty fucking thing to be fired for. Like, he's in the city.

It's so expensive. He's fucked. But it's 2022 now, man. Like, if I was still working at Sears, and I got fired for something as stupid as this, I would be over the fucking moon. Because now it's like, oh, it's big moves time. It's merch time.

It's fucking go the circuit time. It's book deal time. It is insane. Like, I have seen, I was at a library recently with Lacey and we were just making fun of like, we always, sometimes we go to Barnes & Noble's and we make fun of some of the books. But like, there was this book, several books.

how I lost my platform or like how I lost everything cancel culture run amok and it's like you have a book on store shelves that is not censored at all you're breaking it in you got a book deal

but for a book you didn't for a book you likely didn't write let's be real like it's a way different time and I get that people are still sensitive about this stuff because I also was like this is a really dumb reason to get fired.

And I was like, even I was like, this guy's an idiot for not being able to navigate a fucking really small store effectively, but also like that's such a dumb reason to get fired from a job. Even with like the NDACP fucking thing, which was like, it's a bit, a bit weird, but like he seems like a douchebag anyway. Like it's not like, he just, he exuded that kind of energy anyway. So it wouldn't be surprising. It's like when they fired Roseanne because she was Roseanne.

You know? Do you remember that? Yeah. I'm just like, what did you expect? You hired this one. Right. That, I just, I just don't. I, I hear you, man.

I don't care nearly as much. No. And people who do get quote unquote canceled always end up on top. Oh, for sure. Yeah. Always. It's not, I really need people to hear this. It is not a curse.

Like, it is not, like, not, there was a time where it was. There was a time where the infrastructure hadn't been in place to, they kind of like usher these people up. And like that would, there was a time where that was true. And maybe it's still is true for people who like, I don't know, rape.

You know, like if you're a rapist or something. I mean, barely, dude. You know what's fucked up? I've said this a few times in some of my later videos because I've just been,

I'm just, you know, like it's, I'm not trying. This is what people, I've always, you know, ironically painted myself as the radical centrist doesn't exist,

right? Yeah. Like there's that's not even even even citrism itself the way that people painted as it doesn't exist itself where people say oh there's people that just fit sit. The only people that are actually finceding or they're doing it deliberately for like it's like a it's a thing that they're trying to do. Yeah. But everybody always has an opinion on something and it's going to fall somewhere on the political spectrum. Right. So but my whole thing is I've always just been like I just want to hear the arguments first before I make a decision.

and so I would just call myself a centrist or whatever. But it's not like, oh, I'm just trying to, I want everybody to get along or something. I don't get a fuck about that bullshit. But my whole thing is they're increasingly, it is so evident that people on the right will accept damn near anyone, no matter what the fuck they do. And I'm a little jealous because, God damn, man, like, because I'm just like, I'm like, damn, I need some money. but I have integrity and I wish I

didn't. No, yeah, I agree. Because all I had to do, dude, do you know who Herschel Walker is? No. Do you know?

Oh my God. Okay. So he is a ex. He's a hometown hero in Georgia, football, you know,

college guy. He's running for the Senate. He might win. And he is just riddled with CTE He's just He's one of the He's one of the CTE

Yeah what is that That's the fucking It's what you get when you play football When you're boxing Basically it's what OJ Simpson has For sure Once Yeah all those people that just

They have brain damage All these NFL stars Do crazy stuff They beat their wives and girlfriends They end up doing like Murders and all Like it's CTE this guy is so stupid

if so frighteningly riddled with CTE and he's being propped like they'll accept anything and you can do whatever you can you can admittedly you can you can do anything you can be like

there was that Roy, you remember years ago that Roy Moore guy that that Trump endorsed and he was like embroiled in this like pedophile scandal which is so ironic because there's like a you know what I mean it's like this whole like pizza to gate shit, but they were just like,

Roy Moore, and it's like, okay, it's all fucking, it's all partisan, fucking bullshit. But like, yeah, they will accept anybody, and I think it's... And that's why, like, the council culture thing doesn't, that thing that everybody, like the council culture

on that side at least, doesn't exist on that side. Because I will say people on the left are typically more unforgiving. And I would say... Oh, yeah, they're fucking annoying. Yeah, and I would say like in some instances, it's like really fucked up or it's like, dude, I apologize.

I'm trying to move on and they won't give some people a second chance or whatever. That sucks. But then there's people that rightfully just shouldn't be around, you know? You know what I'm saying? And like I'll get put, I've just noticed that like if you want to make good money to regardless of what you've done, what has happened. It's like say there's sexual, there's allegations against Elon Musk, for example, that just recently happened. And he came out as a Republican right before those allegations came out. Perfect strategy.

Because now everybody's saying they're attacking him just because he's conservative. And I'm like, yeah, it's super smart. That's fucking awesome, dude. That's awesome. It's super smart. It's a really smart move because it's not false. Like there are people who just irrationally hate him for no reason. Because people, there's a ton of NPCs out there.

You know what I mean? They're like on every single possible facet of political thought. It's just like, oh, I heard this once. So I believe this. Right. And I see it a lot in every now and then whenever I'll make a very explicitly liberal or progressive post. I'll always check the people who like disagree with it. And it's always like the same people on their feeds where it's like, oh, oh, look, what a surprise.

The 10th person in a row to disagree with me to retweet Matt Walsh. And it's like, of course. Like it's, you know, and it's, I don't know. It's frustrating. I can check that any of his... Sorry. Oh, didn't you do like a kid's book? We're like, didn't he make like a kid's book about like, uh, trans stuff?

Matt Walls? Oh, I think you're right. I think he was trying to counter, uh, the whole like the, the trans or drag people are reading these things. So I want to put like, I think he made his own educational books or at least the daily wire date or some shit. Yeah. Have you seen any of it?

His documentary, what is a woman? Have you seen any of that? No. I heard about it, but like I didn't watch it. I saw a few. Yeah, I don't. I saw a few clips of it, though. It's, it's exactly what you expected. It's just not like, he's trying to be like, uh, he's trying, he's trying to be like he's being open and stuff. It's, it's, it's, it's, it's, I don't, I'm not going to get into it, but it's just like one of those things where it's so, here's a really, this is a really, this is a. is really interesting. I love, I love this. So in the trailer of that movie, there shows a, um, a 15 year old boy, I guess, because it used to be a girl transitioned. And so topless. Now, as a boy, you can be topless. It's like Elliot Page. There's topless pictures of

Elliot Page, right? And like, nobody's freaking out because that's just how we are in society. You know, the men show their nipples, no problem. So here's the thing about people like Matt Wall. he believes that like, you know, women are women, men or men or men. So here's the problem with him showing a 15-year-old topless. You believe that 15-year-old is a girl, you know, even though they transition to a boy. So he technically has, yeah, he has underage porn or just a topless young girl in the trailer of that fucking movie. Or what he believes to be. Exactly.

Right. And, like, if you believe that, then you deliberately put that in your fucking video, son. Or you do respect that this person has transitioned to a boy. And that's why you've included it in there. Or counterpoint, he doesn't care as much as, as much as people think he does. Look, man, I'll be straight up with you. He doesn't give up.

I'll be straight up with you. There are people that I've spoken to who, like, who push this kind of stuff. And they're like, I don't know, this is fucking work. works. It just works. Like, it's why I feel so bad for a lot of people who get sucked into it. Because they don't, they really don't know that the people that they listen to don't care or believe it. Like, they don't care at all about it. Like, the people that you are funding, they're just like me, but they're scamming you. Like, they're just like, they're laughing at you. They're just like, look at these fucking, look at these fucking,

psychos that are just like paying my bills that like oh i got a new house off of these people and it's smart sincerely like i don't even i don't even i wish i could do it man i'd feel like a piece of shit i wish i could do it i'd feel too bad about it it's also just not it's also just not my wheelhouse at all like i just want to make stupid videos like i don't i get it i mean i just kind of want to pay like a quick it's like i'd rather go the route right now what i'm what i'm aiming towards is a one-hit wonder song yeah i want i want a one hit wonder dude i want like a Remember when Superman that ho of Soja Boy like that I want something that's just it goes so viral it gets me paid millions of dollars and then I can just do what I want. Exactly.

Like it just like I understand this route of do it. It's like it's like did you see that clip of Dennis Prager saying the liberals won't debate us? Like we've tried. We've offered money. And I'm like there's no way this guy believes this. This is like what we're talking about. Yeah, it's impossible. I've literally, I've literally seen posts of people being like, I'm progressive.

I'll debate you. I'm available at any time. Yeah, like I've seen, I've seen so many of those. The same thing happened with Dave Rubin a while ago where like, and there was a time where I believe, maybe it was never true, but there was a time where I did believe that was true where like Dave Rubin was like, oh, I just want to talk to people and nobody wants to come on because I had experienced something similar where I would be like, oh, I would talk to people and then they just, like, no.

And I'm like, oh, well, all right. Sorry. Yeah, I think, I think there was definitely some people that maybe they would prefer to have on. Yeah. But there's people like, like, say, for example, Sam Cedar always wants to, it's happy to debate anybody. But they don't want that guy. Like, I don't want to fucking, that guy's fucking serious business. They just want to have a, it's like Joe Rogan.

He, like, Joe Rogan wants to have a conversation. He doesn't want to be challenged. Right, right, right. So, so I feel like it's in the same way. Which, by the way, I don't even think there's anything wrong with that as long as that's the purpose. No, there is it. Like, if that's what you want. Right, it's his show.

Yeah, but to put it on under the guise of, like, challenge is, is insane. It's just like, oh, let me go to, let me go make fun of a bunch of college kids who are fucking stupid. And it's like, yeah, of course. What the fuck? Yeah, that's, that's fun shit, man. That's, that's, that's, uh, it is funny. It is, it's like, man, I think about the time. I, I, I'm really nostalgic when, when comedy was just not particularly,

well, there's always politics and comedy. Like even George Carlin did like fucking fantastic abortion jokes in the 90s and all that. There's always been politics and comedy, but like I feel like internet comedy specifically, even when there were hints of politics to it, were never this political. Like, do you remember radical Islam, that meme

of just like the fucking dude in the turban on a skateboard doing like some fucking... Like... Doing a little fucking handstand on the pipe. That's a political meme, but no one... was offended by it. I feel like if you made that equivalent meme now, there would be all sorts of,

there would be like an article about it or like, you know, people being like, or, and if there was an article about it, there would be people like, I can't believe they wrote an article about you, man. Let's get you on our fucking network and we're gonna, we're gonna monetize the shit out of you and you're gonna, you're gonna sell protein.

And it's just like, there was, there was an innocence to even the most political shit. back in like the early 2010s, late 2000s, and even before that, that the internet has just fucked up because now everything is monetized. Even like slices of your fucking video games are monetized.

And it's just, it's going to keep going. As long as there's like a penny to be milked out of something, there will be people to milk it now because that's just where we're at now. Everybody's trying to get the bag because they can't survive without it. and it's so bad it's so bad now inflation's insane gas is like more expensive than the fucking minimum wage in some places

and it's like this is insane of course people are trying to fucking screw everybody over of course people are willing to pretend to have political positions that they don't have as long as it makes them millions of dollars and keeps them secure like what the fuck no shit I mean it's it's it's just one of those things

where you realize I guess the saddest part is that if if education was better shit like this wouldn't be allowed to happen. That's kind of like at the end of the day, people are too fucking dumb. I don't even think it's, I don't even think it's education because, again, I don't think, I don't even, I don't want to talk about this as if we're, like, unsusceptible to it. Like, like, I don't think, like, I think I'm susceptible to this stuff, but I'm just aware that it's happening and I'm aware that it, that I can be. But I feel like being aware is how

you're not susceptible to it. Right. You're not, you're not, you're not, are you, are you offloading your wallet to somebody that you really believe in? That's what I mean. Yeah, I guess so. But I guess I mean, like, in the same way that you could watch a TV show that's like, let's say like there's an emotional scene in a TV show. And it's like, oh, I can, oh, I'm feeling a little misty-eyed from this. You know, I'm aware that it's not real.

I'm aware that it's not happening. But, you know, it's still, it still does what it does. I think it's kind of like that where it's where it's like being aware doesn't necessarily you know what it's like actually a great example that dude who was like oh I'm uh I turned myself into a pickle I fucking pickle Rick and he like put his his shirt over he did a cornholio

fucking thing for some reason which is not the yeah yeah and he's like standing on top of that Burger King or McDonald's counter and like freaking out and he was like no man I was aware that I was being cringe and it's like that doesn't do anything you're still like you know what I mean

that's it's still cringe bro awareness only Awareness, awareness is like half of it. You know, there's still like the other half of like actually not giving your money to random fucking people to, you know. I mean, look, there's falling for stuff like that and then there's like cult like behavior. There's two different ways. Right, right, right, right.

It's more of there's just like, hey, how about stop it at the part where you're constantly giving your money to this person that like, you know, it's just that. It's just like I feel like if we if we were taught like say critical thinking or whatever in schools, if there were certain classes that promoted like thinking past just like the normal thought that people have because we all have just normal thoughts. And then there's the extra thought that becomes critical. We're like, wait, should I be doing this? And I feel like that's the part that we kind of like fuck up like because I catch myself doing dumb shit all the time where I'm like, wait, why am I doing this?

And then there's it's a thing where I'm like, okay. I caught myself. Good. I'm not going to do this shit anymore. It's kind of like being in a little bit of some of that, the era that we kind of came up in in YouTube. There was a lot of hype and there was a lot of stuff going on that I felt some things were more serious than they actually were.

Like, say for example, Antifa. Oh, yeah. The Antifa thing. I felt Antifa was more of a, it was a bigger deal. I got caught up in it. Antifa's always been Antifa. these stupid you know cosplayers and stuff

oh yeah yeah they they're annoying they don't they've always been there they're always it's the same shit but it felt I felt something like like man shit's getting worse yeah well it's frustrating to see see people just like massed psychos

beat like beat a person over the head with a bike lock you know it's it's and then people are like yeah you know of course yeah that's like fucking weird that's like yeah but and then you look at it it's like oh this is like maybe like 0.3% of it's like point

you know and it's like oh okay so these are just crazy people and okay right right there's always going to be a there's always going to be a percentage of lunatics like the idea that like we can only live in a perfect society if 100% of people are you know

the same exactly the same as us or like you know especially with the population being so high you know you think about like maybe like even 1% of 300 million is a lot of people. Like so if 1% of people are crazy,

that's a lot. Like, that's a lot of people. Especially if you're talking about worldwide. Like 1% of fucking 8 billion, fuck. That's not a small... That's like... That's not a small amount of people.

But... I don't know, man. It's just fucking weird. Anyway, do... Go ahead and... Beces. Everybody, if you want to...

shove a grenade up your up your vagina and nuke that baby go ahead yeah i support it done you got get it get it done man because you pretty soon it's shutting down in your area yeah yeah you gotta you gotta you gotta you gotta you gotta you're eight months in and you're like uh this is cringe actually yeah yeah because that yeah because that's what that's what that's what the majority of women want yeah everybody loves that my i'm sure women love uh gaining an insane amount of wait for eight months being in pain forever and then just being like actually i don't want to see any anything actually i want actually you know what i want this to be for nothing actually like i want to go through this pain and suffering for no reason yeah you ever got you ever got

got to the final boss of like elden ring or from software game and then you just delete your save files yeah yeah just uninstall the game yeah it's it's what you do it's it's the common sense like why the fuck wouldn't you do that you know yeah it's like a that shit's funny as fuck to me bad i love that it is weird that that's but then like it's so funny too because i'll tweet stuff like that right i'll be like oh it's it's you know it's weird that people think it's i'll say a word it exactly like this it's like it's strange how many people feel uh you know feel like women would just like end a pregnancy in the eighth month in the eighth month

and just be like ah fuck this actually and then and then people will be like I don't think that I'm like okay what to say because I'm not talking about you then

aren't I like it's such a weird like people project themselves onto things that don't include them just to be angry it's such a fucking bizarre thing it's like I think I think people who do this

are kind of dumb well it's like well I don't do this okay like good I'm glad yeah like what do you

like if a criticism doesn't apply to you don't don't receive it it's so simple and it's not like you can't be stupid enough to believe that there

aren't people out there who think that like I've had conversations with people who genuinely believe a lot of abortions are like late term I'm like what the fuck like these are real people these aren't like people on the internet these are people that I've spoken

to. You know, especially older people in like families and friends' families who sincerely believe that, oh, this is like a really common thing, this eighth, this late term abortion and people are like really happy to go through it. That's not a, that's not a straw man. That's not like a fake thing. It may be a straw man of you, but if it's a straw man of you, then I'm not talking about you. Right. It is so simple, but I don't know. I mean, think of, and think about, like, I, I, to extrapolate on that, think about the amount of people right now to this, like, right now think a trans person is automatically a groomer. Right. Yeah. Like, it's not, it's not a stretch to that people think that, though, there's these massive waves of late term abortions because somebody is telling them that, just like they're telling them that, you know, all these people are pedophiles and groomers and they're just telling them shit with zero evidence. Yeah, yeah.

And then they just believe it. Well, the thing is it's like... And it's like... Well, their evidence will be like one story. And it'll... And it'll be like... That's what I'm talking about. It'll be...

It'll be the 1% of crazy people. Imagine if we legislated guns based on the 1% of crazy people who have guns. You know what I mean? Like, oh, some kid ran into a fucking Barnes & Noble and shot everyone. You know?

And then they're like, we should take guns. It's like, well, well, you... You can't take guns away just because some fucking psycho did some fucking crazy shit and it's like, okay, okay, you're there, you're okay, good, so you're in this space then.

You understand. Okay, so you understand. So if, if the overwhelming majority of abortions aren't like Lena Dunham reaching into her, they think it's like Lena Dunham shoving an egg beater up there in the seventh month of pregnancy

and being like, it's like that's not how any of this shit and then like laughing about it afterwards like ah ha ha ha I had such a good experience I'm gonna do this again in a year it's like this is not this is not the experience of you I don't know it's just so exhausting

I just yeah it's it's hard man it's it's hard but this is this carms back to what I was saying about being smarter and critical thinking I feel like so much of this shit would be knocked away if they thought just past that original thought of like oh this is happening

and then the critical side of it would be like, is this happening? And then they would just fucking use Google. They would use Google. They'd be like, oh, wait, this is not happening. But Google is controlled, but Google is controlled by the libs. It's by a big lib. Big lib. Big lib.

It's good. Google is controlled and analyticized by big liberal. Big lib. You cannot. Big lib. is big lib. I like that. I love big lip.

Look, I just want the takeaway from this to just be like fucking calm. If you find yourself, if sincerely, like if you find yourself being offended by anything that we're saying,

really examine why. Like, does it really apply to you? Think about it. Think about everything that we've talked about today and like, think about like, does this apply to me? And if it,

if it doesn't, chances are it doesn't. know. Yeah. Because you're watching this. And if you're watching this by now, if you're watching this by now, you know how we feel about certain things. So like, right. So it probably doesn't apply to you. And if it does, maybe think about why we're making funny. Yeah, I would say, I would challenge. I've, man, I've always been this person and then we'll move on after this. I've always been this person that if there was something that I thought was so outrageous to something that I knew, I would look it up. I would be happy. or even if it wasn't, let me just give an example of, I think in 2007, this documentary called Zykeyes came out.

And the first part of it was kind of like an anti-religious thing, kind of an anti-Judeo-Christian thing. Of course, religious people had a huge problem with it. And so it's like, yeah, obviously. And then a thing came out called Zykegeist refuted. And it was supposed to refute all of the points that they made in that first part. I was excited to watch it. I'm like, oh, this is going to be great.

Like, I really, I'm really looking forward to hearing, like, what they're going to counter this stuff to try to strengthen their arguments and stuff. And unfortunately, I was let down because it was just like, the Bible's real because the Bible says it's real. I was like, oh. Oh, yeah, yeah. But, like, but my whole thing was like, I was, I'm so excited to always find the other arguments.

I'm always, I always want to, whenever I hear about, why do people believe this is happening with the late term, but why they think that, like, women are gleefully trying to just terminate after carrying something for so long that they obviously would want to just be birthed normally you know what I'm saying like what do people believe this I want to look into it and I want to see who's saying what and I always find it very fascinating to to see what people are saying not just the people that I like but like what are people saying and man I feel like I gotta tell you the amount of times I've been wrong on something and actually feel kind of good that I now know better. Right. It's nice. It feels good to like, oh, fuck, man, I can't believe I believe that. That was stupid. And I feel much better after, like, I've gotten better information. So I would challenge any niggas, anyone out there.

I'm just saying if the stuff that we've been talking about and you feel offended and what we were talking about, so I challenge you like, go watch a couple of things of some people that you probably normally wouldn't watch. Go fucking go watch, go watch a little Sam Cedar or something. Go just see what he's saying. Just try. Just try. Try it. See what happens. Right. You might, you might, something will... Your dick might get a little hard.

It's so funny, though, because I remember a lot of these, like, Matt Walsh and Candace Owens and all these people who were just, like, jokes to us at a certain point. You know what I mean? Like, like, everybody unanimously agreed, and then suddenly they switch sides, and then it's like, oh, they're great. And it's like, oh, my God. How transparent. Well, Matt Walsh didn't switch sides, but, you know.

Yeah. Do you know what's fucked up about the Candace Owens thing? I talked to Joe Rogan about that When she was on the show Yeah so I did him I basically was like dude Like she's obviously a fucking grifter ball You know and then he laughed about and he was like yeah

I think you're right like he totally agreed Because they had an argument on climate change And it was clear that she was just saying What her side says And she had no idea what the fuck she was talking about And so Joe caught on to that And then fast forward years later Now he's like man

Did you see Canada? Dennis Owens was like dunking on the New York Times or something. I'm like, what the, why are you fucking talk, why are you talking as if she fucking has anything of value to say when you agreed years ago that she was a fucking charlatan? You know what I mean? Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm like, what the hell's happening? I'm like, what is happening?

It's very weird. I don't even know, like, I don't even know anymore. I'm like, I'm like, yeah, I'm like, fuck it, whatever, dude. I, I, I give up. I, like I said, I'm one hit wondering music. That's how I'm going to get my bag. Yeah. Let's make a pop song.

Let's make a pop punk song. I don't care. I want that money, homie. Let's get that. Let's get that bag. Good. All right. We'll figure it out.

Well, we should probably get into some questions. Yeah, let's do it. Before this runs too long. Guy named Gray wrote and he says, Hello, Chris. Emotionally defeated Raygun. It's about Dick. It's about penis and Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau.

Okay. The Canadian Prime Minister is sick today. he couldn't join us. I asked you guys on on what, episode 68, oh my God, how long ago was that at this point? Timestamped 1 hour 3955

about bad features in critically successful games. Now I ask the opposite. Great features in bad games. Example. The, Resident Evil 6 is controversial at best, but it's the first one

to let you aim and walk at the same time. I actually didn't know that because I never played Resident Evil 6. Yeah, dude, I highly vouch for Leon's arc in Resident Evil 6. His campaign. It's so fucking fun. Yeah, it's so fun.

Because they bring back C virus zombies, which is cool. So, like, there's like fucking, or they don't bring back the C virus turns them into like old school zombies. And so, and then there's more of them. But now you're more equipped to deal with the zombies as a regular human, which is pretty cool. So you can kind of, you can do these, like, slides. You can kick the shit out. of these motherfuckers you can back up but it's still since there's an overwhelming

amount of zombies it's still very fucking challenging and very hard that like I had a really I enjoyed the parts of it like say we're in the when you're in the school or the campus or whatever so like that was awesome I didn't give a fuck about Westner's son

because I'm just karate chopping zombies and shit that shit was dumb yeah it was fucking stupid Chris part just turned into call of duty so yeah it was literally just you and some weird French guy and you're just shooting everybody with a bunch of bullets. I was like, ah, this is,

this is like, I feel like I'm playing, I don't know, Army of two. But Chris parts was cool. That was, not Chris, sorry. Leon. Leon parts was cool. I would say, if you can fly Resident Evil 6 for like three bucks or something,

and I know it's on sale all the time, just play that. And you might have some fun with it. I thought the mechanics were kind of cool. It's still kind of dumb. Of course. Yeah. How action packed it is

and all the quick time events. It's still a little weird. It's borderline absurd. Like, I've seen clips of it. I forgot that I get, I've never played it really. Like, I think I played a demo.

Was there a demo of Resident Evil 6? There must have been. There must have been. Yeah, I think, I think I played that, but like, ooh, man.

Yeah. I just, the last time I played it, I think I played it like two years ago. Just, I was playing all the Resident Evil's over. And I was laughing my ass off playing Chris's part,

because it's just so, over the top fucking just military and then you just do these cool like you can just dive backwards while you're shooting and shit it's so fucking it's so crazy like they they tried but you know it just obviously they're like let's just let's just

it reminded me of a dark night rises right it was like it just let's just do everything that is there's no there's no ground anymore oh my god that we're taking That fucking movie, man. That movie upsets me. Like, because it's so fucking weird in the context of its own series.

Like, it's such a bizarre fucking movie. He nukes the ocean. I fucking can't get over that. But, uh, I can't, I can't, I can't think of a bad, hold on, great features in bad, games. The thing is, it's like, I don't think most, I don't think most games are bad.

You know what I mean? I kind of like most of the things that I play, even when they're not, like, amazing. So, like, it's hard for me to distinguish, like, what is, what's, like, what's the worst game that I've ever fucking played? Or not worse, but, like, something that's, like, uniquely bad. Like, Anthem was pretty bad,

and I can't think of anything good about that. You know what's interesting about, and I think a lot of people, because of reviewers, YouTubers, YouTubers, podcasters, I don't play

most really bad games because I know about them thoroughly. Yeah. That is a good point. Games are like deadly premonition that a lot of people

fucking hated, I guess. Like there's some people loved it, but there's other people like just fucking hated it. I've never played it, but I'm sure if I played it,

I'd probably have some interesting opinions on it or, um, that, what was that biker move? There's a biker game that everyone fucking hated. Right to hell.

Right to hell Retribution. Yes. Yes, yes. Like, I imagine, I never played it because I've read and I've seen all about it. Yeah. Yeah, I think, I love that you brought up the other one that the one, but what was the one that you just mentioned? Not right, right. Deadly premonition.

Deadly permission. I'm so fucking David Lynch shit. Yeah, yeah. It's like that move, that game is so, it's weird. It's not good in the traditional sense, but I bet like it feels like it's aged better. because it's it is not good but it's so weird that it ends up being like unique enough to recommend

it's like it feels like yakuza almost like like that kind of thing where it's like what the fuck am I playing but it's more like Twin Peaks uh Twin Peaks uh Twin Peaks style fucking absurdity I wish I could think of like a

I guess the flying in anthem was cool but you know I don't know. I guess I don't play many bad games now. No, that I think about it. Oh, you know what? Actually, I'll say this.

Not that it's bad anymore because they've changed it, although it's still... Even in its good state, it's not necessarily something that I would play. It's not my style of game. But the fact that no man's sky lets you go into the atmosphere and shit, like leave the planet and land on another planet.

I think that shit's dope, and I wish it was in more things. Like, I wish Destiny had that. Like, if Destiny had that, I would fucking... I don't think I would ever stop playing Destiny. But it doesn't. Are you going to play Bethes' new title? I forgot what it's called.

Starfield? Yeah. I mean, it's coming to GamePast, so, yeah. You know, it's... Oh, that's... I figured... Might as well. Yeah, might as well.

It's also just, like, I am very curious about it, because I do like Bethesda games, even though they're jank as fuck. Like, I... The thing is, it's like, dude, because I was... My friend Joe was... He finished Horizon,

that Horizon game for fucking... With A-loy in it? The new one? The new one, yeah. And I was watching him play, and the final thing is so... linear and like there's even this point where like they have you fly through the credits on like a robot bird and it's like it's the camera's positioned as if it's gameplay like it's like oh hey i'm i'm flying my bird

but they don't let you do it and it's like 20 minutes it's like 20 minutes it's like at the very least give me like the illusion of control like let me at least even if this is like on rails and i'm going to be flying through credits at least let me like move around within the screen give me something to fucking do you know and one thing I appreciate about Bethesda games even though they're jank

and they're overhyped and they're kind of ugly is that they are truly video games they're not like oh I'm trying to be a movie or like oh I'm trying to be like a cinematic fucking masterpiece

I'm trying to be in you know every frame of this is picture perfect and choreographed and animated to a T it's like no go ahead and go ahead and blow

up Megaton in the first 10 minutes. Go ahead, do it. Go ahead, do it. I dare you. And then you do it and fucks everything up. And it's awesome. Like, I love that. Yeah. Yeah, that is true. But, uh, Cremlin de Gremlin wrote in. He says, do any of you guys have your own Mandela effects slash false memories? For some reason, I had this memory back when I was around 8 at a

game stop looking at a game called Crash Bandicoot unleashed, even though it doesn't exist. I love that. I love this. concept of like fake memories because I have so many. And also the idea that, and also the idea that like, it's easy to kind of fuck with people now. Because I see, every now and then I'll see like, I'll see some TikTok or some video on YouTube or like something on Twitter of like some guy like, like, like, like, making their own Arthur toy or whatever. And it's like Arthur the Yardvark and they put like a burglar mask on him and they give him like a little gas can and they reprint the packaging perfectly. and it just says arson now with gas can and lighter.

And just the idea that somebody could put that on a shelf. Somewhere they're just like, I'm going to bring this into the store, put it on a shelf, and then leave. And then some kid will see that and will think that it's one of these. It's like, oh, of Mandela effect, like, oh, how funny what a fake memory, but it's real. And you're just getting fucked with. I love that. That's way easier to do now than it was. Yeah, right.

So chances are this was a fake memory. but I don't know I see that all the time like people like photoshopping box arts of video games and then returning them to the store like I've seen a million of these but I think the one memory that I know for sure isn't real because it would be insane if it was

was I remember when I was like three and I might have told the story on the podcast before but like it was definitely like a long ass time ago I was like three or like maybe four definitely not over four I was like a wee child and I was watching some show about space. I think it was Cosmos with Carl Sagan.

I think it was that. And I remember just like seeing planet Earth and only kind of half absorbing what that meant. It was like, oh, planet Earth is in the solar system. And, you know, I missed the part where he said, that's our home. Because I just sort of assumed that like, that child Chris in that time,

I think understood some. space as if space was space and then we were at the bottom of space. Like space was everything above the ground. Like we weren't on a planet. We weren't on anything. It was just like there was the bottom and then there's space. And I remember learning about planet Earth and being like, oh, interesting. And then I looked over to my window to see if I could see it in the night sky and I did.

Like I just like I just like I just imagined it in the sky I think I probably like photoshopped it in my head like over the moon or something But I was like oh look it's planet Earth Wow crazy And then I just went about my night Like I just didn't I didn't tell anybody about it because I was like oh well it's on TV everybody knows this And then I learned like way later It wasn't like a revelation or anything but I just I realized like

I remember seeing earth in the sky When I was like three And it made no fucking sense I don't think I have anything that crazy or anything It's always just little small things I just misremember things Even though I swear I'm like oh it was definitely this way Just even little things where I remember I bought a

The Black Dahlia Murder's second album And the second song on there It's called I'm charming But I swear I'm like Did they fuck up and do reprints? Because I thought it's a I'm charging.

Like it was charging and not charming. But like I vividly remember. Like it says charging and then people would say I'm charming and I'm like, what are you fucking talking about? Being very confused and my brain just really just made it that. And this was 2005. Fast forward to I think 2020 or something. And this band fucks their name.

Periphery. They released a album called Hail Sagan. and it's just, you know, because Carl Sagan died or something. They were just, it was just like an homage or whatever. And for some fucking reason, I, until my friends pointed out, I thought it actually said, hell Satan. And I was like, that's weird. I'm like, is this a fucking Satanist album?

I was like, they're not like into that shit. I was like, this is so weird. And then I mentioned it. And I was like, yeah, I was like, have you guys listened to their new album, Hell Satan? And one of my boys looked at me. He was like, you mean Sagan? And then I was like, fucking embarrassed.

Because I looked at it and I was like, oh my God, it says Sagan. But like my brain the entire time, it said Satan. But it clearly doesn't say that. Like it happens to me every once in a while. And then I just, it's just, that's my brain. And that's what it is. And then I, it's, I don't know how it does that. Yeah.

Like it doesn't, it's clear as day what it says that my brain will just change it, I guess, for fucking whatever reason. It's so weird. So I'm just checking Twitter real quick. Anime Expo is happening right now. and apparently the LAPD and the fire marshal are no longer letting people in.

Was there too many fat, greasy people in there? It's too many people. This is the biggest crowd I think I've ever seen post-pandemic. Like this is crazy. This is going to be a big fucking problem. But, uh-oh. That's going to be a lot of COVID.

Oh, man. Well, actually, it might not be because, like, you know, it's anime people. You know? What does that mean? They're not going to spread it after this because they're not going to be seeing it. anyone. That's good point. That's a good point. I'm sorry, that was such a cheap shot.

But, uh, all right, let's see. Mexedankus Sanchez wrote and he says, Hey, Swin, Blackman, Blackman, and, uh, Mr. Gunn, with a lot of terrible YouTubers getting shows or movies. If you could choose one of your favorite YouTubers or it could be yourselves if you want to get a show or movie, who would it be? Ralph. Ethan Ralph. Ethan Ralph. Ethan Ralph. I need Ethan Ralph to have a talk show. where he interviews genuine celebrities, and he asks every one of them to say slurs with him, and then they leave, and then he never gets another,

he never gets a repeat guest. Like that's, I need, I need that to happen. I'll back that up, dude. I'll back that up. I, I want to,

I need that shit, too. I don't think there is a more perfect person with which to be, I don't actually know, like, is that happening a lot now, like people getting their own shows? I feel like,

I feel like the only person that I could think of is Zach. with smiling friends. Like, I don't know if that's, I don't know if anything, I know the annoying Orange had a show like years, like a decade ago, but that's,

I think it's pretty rare. I think it's pretty rare. And for a good thing, right? Because a lot of people just aren't, they're just not, they don't have it. Like, I don't want, I don't want. There's a lot of people.

I'm like, oh, you know, they're really entertained. They're really cool, but I'm like, ah, just keep doing what you're doing, you know? Yeah. Keep doing what you're doing.

But like, there's some people, people like watching Zach and and watching Michael shit where I'm like this makes sense. Yeah totally. Yeah. No, that makes perfect sense.

Yeah, I'm like, this makes sense. This is, they're born to do this shit. Ethan, Ralph, though, you can transition to anything that he fucking wants to do. This man is he's born he just doesn't, man, he just, he can't

help himself. Like he just keeps going. He went to some of the protests when people were out protesting Rovi Wade being overturned. Oh, did he really? Yeah, and he does like the in real life streaming. Like, you know, pretty much that it's only reserved for

like sad, pathetic people. Like the worst people out of Earth do that fucking streaming. And then, so he's there. And then there's just women just shitting all over him. It's so great. They're just, you know, talking about how gross he is. And that just everything. He's just getting humiliated, but I don't think

he knows what that means anymore. He's like, there's so much. Have you ever seen Windy City Heat? I haven't. That sounds familiar, but I don't think I've seen it. Yeah, it's, it describes him perfectly, I feel like, because he's this guy who just thinks, he thinks that he's more famous in a positive way than he is.

You know, it's just like everybody clowns on him. He's a joke, but not to him. Like, he's not a joke to him. And he's, right. Right. It's, Windy City Heat is a wild movie. That has like, fucking,

it's just all these celebrities playing pranks on this fucking nobody who thinks he's amazing. Like, it's got, like Tom Kenny's in it for some reason, fucking,

I think Jimmy Kimmel back in, like, early 2000s is in it. And they all just, like, they orchestrate this whole thing of just like, we're gonna,

we're gonna set, we're going to set this guy who thinks he's amazing up with, like, all of these fake opportunities. And he's going to progress through like, oh, it's like you got the job working for fucking

this show or whatever. And it's all fake. They orchestrate the whole fucking thing. And it's... So it's almost like the, like that Truman shit? Yeah, but... Yes, but it's so difficult to... It's like if the Truman show and impractical jokers was the same thing.

Like, it's, it's like they just fuck with this guy. So much. Almost like how I feel like that Andy Milanochus treated that Ralphie guy. Do you remember that guy? Oh, yeah, yeah. Like, who the fuck is that? What happened on Ralphie? But, uh, yeah, I don't know.

I would say Ralph. I would say Ethan Ralph. All right, let's see, let's see. Let's see. What is this? Sorry, not beautiful. Sorry. Sorry.

Sorry, not beautiful. I like my, I like my women lobster thin. SpongeBob's giant fake titties. in my fucking face. I like my women half plastic and half dead. SpongeBob Square Tits, Rodin, says,

You goblins missed my question last time, so I'll repeat, would you rather come shit or shit come? I guess... I'll shit come all day. I guess I'd rather shit come, yeah. Like, coming shit sounds really awful.

Imagine, imagine blowing a load in the chick. Like, that's like... Shit? Oh, my God. That is so heinous. That would make... She wouldn't even be able to kill me

because I would have done it already. Right. You know? Yeah. My God. I guess it would only make sense to have anal sex. You know, can you just come shit in her ass? Oh my God.

Come here. Come here. Come here. I got to come shit in your head. That's so fucking gross. That might be the grossest thing I've ever envisioned. Yeah. You get...

God. Yeah, it's a pretty... Wasn't that literally like a South Park thing? The fecal transplants? Uh, what? Where they would like, where they would like surgically put other people shit in people's assholes? Because it like...

Because it helped them stay young. I have not seen that. I have not seen that. It's more of a modern... It's not like in the last five years, but definitely in the last like eight, I think. That was, uh, yeah. Hold on me look it up just to make sure I'm not...

I haven't seen it. I haven't seen it. I've been. I've missed like a lot of that shit. Fecal transplant South Park. Season 23, episode 8. Yeah. But I never heard.

So I thought. Interesting. So this is a fun story. I thought that that was a South Park joke, right? Because it's on South Park. And I'm like, oh, that's so stupid. It's funny. Like it's like, oh.

Like Mr. Hay. It's just absurd shit. Right. Pardon the pun. But. But. it's real what do you mean

yeah yeah that's what I said it's a real it's a real fucking thing like fecal transplants are not a South Park joke that is not something that exists purely

in the realm of South Park this is a real thing that does in fact happen like people are transferring shit yeah to each other

fecal transplant a fecal transplant oh my god webmd md is it's a all right so this This is like not the most reputable source, but it is real.

A fecal transplant is a procedure that takes the stool of a healthy person into the colon of someone who's ill. Your doctor may call it bacteriotherapy. Who needs a fecal transplant? Fecal transplant is used to treat a severe bacterial infestion called C or difficile. So it's real. I see. And I imagine, so are they... Because I imagine they're not just grabbing someone shit out of their ass and shove it in somebody else's ass.

I mean, that's definitely how they do it. You know, it's definitely like, why? Like, what other way would you do? You know what I mean? Because, well, look, because you're not going to open, you're not going to be like, open me up, Doc. You know? Like, look, I've seen, look, look, I.

Maybe they just, maybe they just have, maybe what it is is that they sand, they take the healthy people and they sand their butt cheeks away. So that their asshole is, so that their asshole is flush. So, yeah, they don't have, They don't have fucking ass cheeks. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like a fucking dog.

Like a fucking dog. Like a cat. Yeah, like a cat or like, or like, gumby or something. And they just like, it's, it's, and they just shit into, shit directly into the asshole. Yeah. They like, they, they, they join the assholes together. They dock. They dock.

They dock assholes. Yeah. And they shit directly. I, I lost, I lost my shit. I lost my shit. my shit, no joke intended. But like, I lost my mind when I saw this. When I learned that this was real and not a South Park joke.

Look, I've seen people trying to get like, yeah, like, see, look, if this is what I think, because I'm looking at pictures, this is exactly what I was thinking, like, capsules. They like swallow shit capsules. And then that that's what it is. But then I'm seeing, oh, okay, I'm out of here. Yeah, get out of there. You know what? You don't want to spend a lot of time. Not to see liquid shit and syringes.

Oh my God. That's so bad. You imagine getting diarrhea implanted in you on purpose? That is so fucking crazy. Intravenously? Intra in your veins? Diary in your fucking veins. It's me.

It's me diarrhea veins. Oh my God. It keeps me. It's what keeps me youthful, man. There's diarrhea literally. pulsing through my heart. That's so sick. You might live forever.

You never know. W. Wolf 13 in Roman numerals writing says, greetings to the glorious high kings of melanin and their court jester. Did you know that elephants have prehensile penises, meaning they can move them like monkey tails? That's awesome.

I did not know that, and I also don't know if I believe it. I think I might have to look at a video of this. to really... Do you really have to see a video of that? Elephant penis. You're really interested in seeing an elephant, elephant, elephant, cock, like swinging around like crazy? If it can wrap around someone's fucking face like that,

like a monkey tail. That'd be pretty cool. An elephant's penis acts like a second trunk. Oh, that's so awful. That's fucking dope. So they can drink through it? Yeah, I don't know. I don't know if that's what they...

Wait a minute, do they drink through their... Wait a minute, what is a trunk exactly? Now, I think of it. They can suck up. I mean, it's their nose. They can, you can, just, like, technically, you can suck water through your nose and into the back of your throat. You can do that. Yeah, but you would probably die doing that, like, consistently.

It would, if you were bad at it, but if you, if you, uh, it's like I've mastered, like the netty pots and all that shit, you know? Oh, I can't do that shit. I can't do it. I feel like I'm killing myself when I do that. Like, it feels like a suicide attempt. You got to master it, man. You just get it. I have to do it every once in a while because my fucking sinuses are so shit.

Yeah. So it's fucking. And I feel honestly like a new person once I do it. What would you do? It's like. I believe that. It looks incredibly satisfying. But what would you do if you did that?

You tilted your head to the side. You put the Nidipot. And then like a big piece of shit, a big literal piece of shit came out. A piece of shit. I'd have so many questions. I'd have so many questions. Like how did this get here? Would you sell it to a dollar?

How did I not smell it? I would sell out a TMZ. Yeah, I would give it to them. This is the first nasal shit. How it got there? How did I not smell it? How is it that big? There's so many questions.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. And. Okay. Yeah, I'm here for it. Well, I'm here for it. The computer that I was reading questions on just shut down. And the charge, I guess the charger wasn't plugged in. Whoops.

So I guess that is going to be it for us today. But I'll open the Google Doc on my phone because we have to. Where the fuck is it? There it is. So, yeah, if you guys... Wait, update, you fool. If you guys like what you heard here today... I don't know how you could have.

I don't even know what the fuck we talked about. Consider supporting us over at patreon.com slash a snarkang. One dollar a month gets you early access to every episode and access to bonus solo episodes. And $5 gets you your questions read on the show. $10 gets you access to our Discord server. That's one payment in. You're in for good. And $25 gets your name dyslexically read at the end of the show, which, hmm.

Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. One thing I'm going to say because because of the... Keep talking, keep talking. Technical difficulties that we've had I missed another podcast before I don't even remember why Before that and then I had Corona this time We were supposed to put out

That I need Oh your solo episode fresh solo questions Oh yeah yeah I wanted fresh questions from the audience We'll post a we'll post a I think I I did already I'm not sure I have to check But like

Did you? Maybe. I remember I typed one up, but like I might not have posted it. But there, yeah, well, if that thread doesn't already exist, it'll be up today of just solo questions that you guys can ask Derek and he'll bang it out. And then it's, uh, that it's Sweeney at the end of the month. We'll just, we'll just stick with the fact that it's like, whatever, we relate this time. No big, no reason to delay. But, uh, I have to log into the Patreon on Sweeney's computer and it's, yeah, there's a lot of porn here. Is there really?

Oh, it just doesn't stop. What kind of porn? Expose them. A lot of animals. Lots of animals. Surprisingly few people. A lot of elephants with the amazing control of their fucking tail penis. Yeah, it's elephants fucking corpses at funerals with their trunks.

That's all it is. Strange. Anyway, I'm going to read these names now. Your Noble Truths, Joker Goofy says you get what you fucking deserve, Maxie. I'll make my own snark tank with blackjack and hookers. The fast and the morbious Tokyo dick. Fuck traveling overseas. I'm traveling into her over ease.

Mojave scribe. SpongeBob square tits. Elsie Braze pyramid scheme. Nancy Pelosi killing a Palestinian with her massive tits. Dom. Yep. Get a fucking beer glass.

It's Viagra Falls in this bitch. Fresh fecal fiesta. Dom! Fresh fecal fiesta. Fresh fecal fiesta. It is really hot in this room. Obi won't you blow me. A fukin prawn.

Glasses are just real-life FOV sliders. Zach Cool number. Chris, I'm that blonde guy with the chode. You met at that Scottish gay bar in Brooklyn. XOXO. That guy at the bar. Jokes on you, my friend.

Interesting. I don't go to Brooklyn. Nice try. If you would have said Queens, it's possible. Your favorite Martian is back. Tevin de Black. Kremlin de Gremlin. Binkus Stinkus.

George R. Martin. The person whose name is impossible to read again. Mitch McConnell's tortoise St. Maxie. From the makers of they-them pussy. It's they-them-come. All's the wall. You said it right.

Man X8 guy in the lack of anything funny to say this time. Avi. And as always, rounding out our list the King of Hab Hazard. I became a patron and spent 25 bucks not to be able to come up with a clever name. Wage Slate 583. What if JFK's head just did that? I feel gay. Fuck you. Chris letting out a long why followed by a series of why not

after learning Lady Gaga's playing Harley Quinn in the Joker 2. If that's real. Lady Gay Gay, Gay. Yeah. Dead inside. The Papine. brothers and boring him of a bullet-filled uncle, shrink his funcule dunk, the warlock who is using transversive steps, and $25 gets your name to suck secret at the end of the show,

which I will now do. I have PPSD. Riber 525 in the sudden mystery and the sudden uptick and tomboy appreciation. I ate sidewalk chalk and cat food, and I ain't afraid to know poo-poo hands touching my milk. Fun fact, the TLC channel was made in 1972 by NASA and now has educational programming geared towards retards. Have a nice day. Tell him Steve, Dave.

100% true. Yeah. Antifist Maximus, wieler of the enchanted bike lock. God is dead because Amber heard chat in his bed John Strickland Mr. Rogers shows you around his crib But he's not your neighbor Mark Murchs 1889

Downey McFrawny If I had a nickel for every time Chris was on a podcast talking If Alien fucking was Beastiality I'd have two entire nickels I was recently mentioned by name In a suicide note Katie Rachel is officially over one now yeat

The First Church of Keith David Tis the season to be gay I want to Tarantino I want Tarantino to write a Star Trek movie Where Samuel L Jackson is God and Kirk has to fight him to death. Drunken Dulehan, pre-Raz. Ain't that a kick in the dick?

What's that? Blake 896. Hey boss. Who wants Sween to know that his taste in movies is bad and Shang-she was met as fuck? Ryan Lucchese. Slashy Scout. Inside, we both know what's been going on. Perenthees going on.

We know the game and we're going to play it. Oh, my God. That's fucking going to... That's never going to give you up. Depraved McBooty. Oh, is it? Yeah. God. De Prave McBootie,

Booty-Dababobody, a hard hat skydiver, Alaska-no-field trash, Marcus Shorten, the green goblin gobbling up Gary's Gygax, Guy Gash? I don't know.

Game Controller 25. My friend hates your take on Marvel versus Capcom 3. Please apologize to him because he keeps bringing it up. No, it was ugly. Lobomized Jesus and his merry band of finger nuggets.

I can't read this shit. But he ends it with feed somebody forks and they fuck toasters. The only stick I touch while driving is my P and his parentheses I masturbate while driving. Wasn't an escalation, but a pre-moment of levitation. Sweeney's clown pussy goes Hong Kong.

Yummy yummy, yummy, yummy, come inside my tummy. Jackson, Abstage, Badly Brave, Huggard, the movie theater manager, Aetherian, Memphis, One, Hes, Warlock Hellke, Hex Blade supremacists who recently achieved lichdom, Bricter 86. And, at the end, as always, the king of haphazard. The king. Let's go. Let's go. Let's go.

Let's fucking go. Let's go. By the way, guys, Spider-Man 8. Spider-Man 2 was officially an adult. yesterday Spider-Man 2 turned 18 Really? So,

Oh my God, that's insane Fuck me It's weird When you think about that shit, right? I never seen that in theater It's getting really uncomfortable It's weird I was like, dude

And I was like fucking Spider-Man The first one was like, Holy fuck. Like, I can't believe how long it's been Yeah It just, it doesn't seem like it, man I hate being at, I hate being at an age

When I can say 20 years ago I did this Right It's really uncomfortable. But anyway, that's going to be it. We'll catch you on the flip side. Remember, if you want to get on that solo episode, go to the Patreon and ask those questions. We'll put a thread up immediately after this is done recording.

And, uh, peace. Uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh.