The Snark Tank - #13: Evil Robits

Episode Date: March 12, 2020

Will Artificial Intelligence destroy us? Why is Castlevania's Netflix series so good for no reason? Did Michael Jackson do it? A spirited debate ensues! Will Osama Bin Laden ever perform a post mortem hologram concert like Tupac did? Why does Chris look forward to a societal collapse? How long would it take for us to turn to cannibalism? Is sex with advanced robots considered cheating? Chris absolutely hates this episode and considered literally deleting it so, we hope someone likes it at least! Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Hi everyone. This is Mariah Rose, co-host a full circle and the creator behind Hoops for Hotties. Whenever I'm headed out to a workout first thing in the morning or getting ready to yab about sports with the girls, I'm drinking Gatorade Lower Sugar. I've always been a Gatorade Girlie, but I don't always need more sugar in my life. So Gatorade Lower Sugar is perfect. It has 75% less sugar than regular Gatorade and all the electrolytes. It hydrates better than water and has no artificial flavor, sweeteners, or colors. Try Gatorade Lower Sugar today. Available on Gatorade.com. in stores nationwide. Ever feel like your bedroom's shrinking? Don't worry.

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And yes, your childhood teddy bear gets a spot too. Don't sell what you love. Store it instead with IKEA bedroom storage solutions. Shop now at IKEA.com. slash bedroom storage Do the intro as Roger Klotz. Yeah, welcome to the Snark Tank. I forget what...

Funny. Welcome to the Snark Tank podcast, funny. I can't do it. I used to... I did it really good in Vegas. Yeah, you were on it. Yeah, but I was also drunk the entire time. That's very true.

Yeah. Welcome to the Star Tank podcast, everybody. I'm Chris Raygun, and I'm joined once again by Tom Sweeney. I'm Tom Sweeney. Welcome back. And Derek, some black guy, blackman. Some black guy, black man. Who's so cool.

Oh, you was good, huh? Consider your guys' Consider your guys' selves lucky that this episode is even happening because it very easily could have not because Derek's car exploded on his fucking birthday. Happy birthday, by the way.

Yeah, I have birthday. Derek. Thank you so much, guys. It's disgusting. I'm 17. So I'm almost there. You guys can almost touch me. I'm getting close.

But yeah, it was pretty messed up. I was on my way to my hometown and as soon as I got off the freeway my car was acting a little funny right you just notice hey it's not supposed to be slowing down when it should just be automatically in third gear maybe you know and then it just kind of didn't do that it went to I think second yeah you know

and as soon as I made a right onto this main street as a ton of smoke poured out of the exhaust like like the kind that you see in like old pento like disgusting cars that like cheat the smart test. Yeah. So like that kind of smoke. Nice.

And so I pulled into the CVS and I'm like, hmm, I shouldn't be driving. Try to start it. Just a bunch of smoke came out and it just wouldn't start. It would like kind of turn over, but it wouldn't actually start. I've never had a car break down on me. And I'm really glad that I haven't because I feel like I would just abandon the car. I can't deal with it. That's such a major inconvenience to me than I'd rather just deal with it.

I just couldn't deal with it. If it was genuinely, if it was an old car too, it was like an old. beat up piece of shit like Jalen's car the car that I drove to California from New York in. Yo dude there was one time one time our old roommate Jalen's car broke down and we lived on we lived in Glendale so I had to walk all the way down

far into Glendale and we had to push it into a CVS Why is it always CBS? I don't know it was a CVS there too you had to put it to a CVS because there's always a CVS there's always one it was a parking lots a little parking lots and they always have everything that you would conceivably need in a situation like that I stock up on some water you know I'm in my

car, let me get some water. Yeah, man. Dude, it was hilarious. Your cars are way heavier and I thought they were, man. Yeah. Like, they're like a ton. They're on average, they're a ton. They're like, you know what cars have to make a metal.

She's like, oh, they're heavy. Yeah. But then when you push one and you go on a little bit of incline, you realize how much heavy they are than your strength. You know how you know they're heavy is because when people hit them, they typically get real hurt. Yeah. Yeah.

That's how you know they're heavy. You don't need to push a car to know how heavy it is. But you, when you push it is a different level of like understanding, you know? I feel like whenever I push a car It's way lighter than I thought it would be I mean they move because of the wheel Because I'm like what the hell this moves But like when you

Like because we're going Wheels are amazing Yeah Yeah thank you for that first chip man I made a wheel You're a real cool dude We appreciate you I'm thinking about like pulling out like a pallet of water

Or something like you know those 30 packs of water And there's a palette of them And you can just put it on a jack And you can somehow pull that Yeah It's kind of ridiculous to think about that This fucking wheels make you feel like a god Yeah man

Really thank you for that Thank you ancient human for that That's really cool of you. You're the OG. Thanks. Imagine we never, like, figured out wheels. What would we do? We had cube everything.

There are cubes. There are cubes instead. Like fucking boxes. There would be no point, dude. You might as well just put the things in a box and drag it. Yeah, because you slide them. Everything would be based on inclines. You'd have to slide shit.

That'd be a better universe. Fuck you, wheel-making guy. Actually, you're a bitch. Yeah, we're an asshole. We could have done something better. Exactly. The wheels. You fucking cave-dwelling idiot.

Fuck you. So before we get two into the weeds here, we had a question for a couple weeks now that we've just never been able to get to because I thought it was a pretty good, I thought it was a pretty interesting topic of conversation. Wretched Spawn. Ooh, okay, that sounds so.

Threat your lives. Have you ever had to deal with people accusing you of acting white? Oh. Particularly people from within your own respective ethnic groups. I would say when you're young, you don't really have to, this is coming from my opinion. When you're young, most kids, don't really have that sort of mentality unless you grow it really i think it depends on neighborhood

to neighborhood because like since i grew up in a very Hispanic neighborhood there wasn't a ton of black people so really there was one black dude this dude named corey that would give me shit for not being as fucking fresh as him because he had the best cut best fucking shoes and like i didn't give a fuck about him that stuff yeah all right so he would like clown me for that shit but he was the only person just because he was like he's probably right now like in a gold suit or something

he's like one of those people so I'm like fuck him he doesn't matter but everybody else was kind of cool about it until I got a little bit older that I realized that there was like that really existed that I was like so different

because I still I wasn't in the hip hop culture but I listen to hip hop like I listen to everything I love metal I would just wear regular shit and so I didn't feel like I was wider

or acted white or anything until I got to a certain age probably like high school, then there was a couple of people, it started floating around. Yeah. Right? Like there would be some people like,

oh, if I heard you on the phone, I would think you're white. I'm like, I understand what you're saying, but at the same time, you got to think about how many black people are in the world. Like, not everybody sounds like black Americans.

No, for sure. I'm like, there's fucking, there are Negroes in the UK that speak like Lord fucking Byron, you know, like, I'm just saying, like, I've kind of figured that shit out so it just never really occurred to me.

And then I was like, damn, everyone thinks all black people sound like black people that came from the South in America. Yeah, yeah. So it kind of blew my mind. It's really weird. Yeah, it blew my mind. I was like, what the fuck? Because nobody's ever coming to me and say, you don't sound Hispanic. You know what I mean?

That's not like a thing. It's like specifically a black thing. It is. Like, I don't think anybody really thinks that about any other group of people. I think everybody understands. I don't really have any examples. Just like the thing with metal, I started wearing banties probably from my 16 years old. Yeah.

And it was like a revelation of people like, whoa, what's this? How do you listen to that stuff? And I'm like, I just, with my ears, man. What do white people sound like? It's the thing where... I've seen people be like, Really? Welcome to the wooie.

It's me. I can tell you what a white man sounds like, easy. Let me get you with it. Hey there, and how's it going? My name is Bradley, and I'll be helping you with your intercom today. Oh, thank you. My name is James Jones, and I need that help. Ham.

Well, Jim. Whiz, Tanner. I'll be able to help you this in just a second. Tanner? Tanner? Tanner. Tanner? Hunter. Hunter. There's no black people named Hunter. Cletus.

Cleetus. That's not even a real name. Specifically regional. It is regional. Cletus is someone, every Cletus has at least two family members that are related. That should not be related. Yeah. Yeah.

They're flipper families. Yeah, for sure. For sure. There's like one cleetus in the audience. And he's like, fuck you He's fuck you guys Hey, god damn it Like

Ah, you're right He's not He's in the bathtub Listening to this Slitting his wrists the long ways Oh no Yeah man I

No but the whole thing about that The accents, the dialects Yeah It's just people I always say we lack Critical Thinking skills right Because people think But they don't think

Critically Because it just stops It's like Oh I've all black people Sound this way And I'm like Why don't you go A little bit further

With that thought And then when you realize Like wait That can't even possible because everyone sounds different depending on where the fuck you grew up. It's so weird dude. It's like it's a weird thing. And then when you think about where black people even got that accent

from, white people from the south. We fucking, they were taken to the south. They were, you know, work to death. And they developed their fucking southern twang. And then black people started to move. And then that shit started to spread everywhere. My favorite is like say, you know, black people from the south, yeah, the southern twang that moved to the northeast. Yeah. Like say like fucking

Riza. And like people like that, that's my favorite accent. Because like it's the mix of like the New York accent and like the southern accent. The Wu-Tang man. Yeah. Oh my God. That's like they were like a huge influence in my whole life. I fucking love Wooten Klan. Yeah. I love when two accents that come together that's like very, they're very different from

each other. There was a viral video of this, uh, this Vietnamese that grew up in Texas and he was fishing during the hurricane. Like he was in the eye. I remember that. I remember seeing it. And he's like, I'm in the eyeball up the hurricane. Like so it was like Vietnamese and like that Texan accent. I was like, what am I crazy?

One of our friends is like that One of our friends is Australian and Indian What who? Ria She just sounds Australian to me I think she has a bit of an Indian accent Not a huge one But it's a bit of it.

Well she can't like She can put it on When she's like Because she's definitely like put it on Like as an exaggeration Whenever she's like Speaking the language But like whenever she talks in English

She sounds like Australian The audience has no idea anyway They know a great A under aid That YouTuber Oh my God I don't even know what the fuck accent that was I pinpointed right away he's uh he's an indian uh british indian

british indian yeah like their like his accent they the indian that mixed with the british they a lot of them have that very specific distinct accent i was like i know he's indian and what is the worst accent oh the worst hmm i think southern black man no no not even close not even close i hate it dog i think that's charming and shit i don't like boston boston to me is horrible They sound like slurred.

They sound, look, New York accents don't sound that great. But then when Boston accents are just disgusting New York assets. I'll take it a little bit further. Boston women. There's something about women that talk, like that sound, that accent, that really turns me off. Like, like, when I hear men, it's like, oh, it's fucking Matt Damon, whatever. I don't like really Mexican women accents either, though, TBAH. Like, my girlfriend's Mexican and she sounds like an American for the most part.

Okay, yeah. But, like, really like, I know, huh? Like that shit is so disgusting. That Chola. That Chola shit, dude. I used to date Cholas though. That was like my vice for a long time. They were fucking glowing white. Like they would put on the pale ass shit and they would stencil on their fucking...

Oh my God. And they'd have their fake eyebrows. Oh, my God. I swear it's... All my ex-girlfriends who are Cholas, I'm real sorry. I hate y'all now, though. That is so weird to me. Because I'm like Hispanic and I never saw that.

But that's not Mexican. I know. But like, like, there's... Like, Mexican isn't super... Like, I feel like... The culture is pretty different from Puerto Rican. Right. But, like, I feel like when you're in New York, New York is so mixed up, yeah, Caribbean.

That's true. You know? So, like, I feel like I never even, I don't think I met a single Mexican living in New York, actually. It's insane, dude. Like, if New York, there's so many Caribbean people there. Yeah. Like, it's ridiculous. Yeah, there's more Puerto Ricans in New York than there are in Puerto Rico.

Like, way more, dude. Which is the funniest shit. When I found out I was Puerto Rican, when I finally understood it, I was like, huh? Of course you are. You're in New York. Exactly. My guy was like, what do you think this flag in our? living room's for and I'm like I don't know

I thought it was a stupid American flag. The Puerto Rican flag is like a fucking retarded American flag. I thought it was Captain America's shield grandma. It is literally just Captain America's outfit. It's the front of his outfit. Dude, that's amazing. Captain Puerto Rico. Captain Borico.

I like it. Captain Guilla. That'd be hilarious. I also want to say before I get further, if we have any female Boston fans, I'd still hit it, you know? I want to be. I just want to be clear I don't have such a piece of shit

You're such a bottom feeder But like I'm not I'm trying to lift their spirits Up after I said they're the worst And now you're saying I'm a bottom feeder All I'm saying is that

You don't have to talk Well we got a bunch of questions here To carry the rest of this Godforsaken show Yep yep I'm dying I got coronavirus I'm slowly

I'm slowly walking towards a grave I think I'm fighting it off Slowly my body's failing But yeah If I perish Very soon I don't want worry about it, honestly.

Just no big deal. Laugh at me. Laugh. Show up to your funeral and laugh at you. Registered Vex Offender wrote in. Ooh, that's close. I like that a lot. That's typical.

Hello, black, black, and ambiguously brown. I'm not ambiguously brown. I'm just, I'm just Puerto Rican. It's not really brown. Well, I guess you're ambiguous because people wouldn't be able to tell just by looking at you. That's true. I'm a chameleon. But so are Puerto Ricans in general.

Yeah, they are. I mean, especially their music. Yeah. Bonnet. Banda? What the fuck? Whoa, is that gasoline again? If you had to throw one person...

If you had to throw one person from the past, present, or future, screaming into the void of space, who would it be? Love the show. P.S. Swing, get a channel, you massive gremlin. Why? I'm not a gremlin. Ew, don't call me that.

Past, present, and future. Past, present, or future. I don't know how you would choose the future. Or, or. For me, it's easy. I already know. Let's see what you got, though. Let's see what you got.

I'm thinking, past, present and future. Damn. You know what? You got to go because I actually, I hadn't think about a little... I would definitely choose Ronald Reagan right when you just become exceenow. I hate him so much. But that would be fun for him, probably. Success starts with your drive. An American Public University is here to fuel it. With affordable tuition and over 200 flexible online programs, APU helps you gain the skills and confidence to move forward. Whether you're changing career, starting fresh or pursuing a lifelong passion.

Our programs are designed for people who never stop. You bring the fire, APU will fuel the journey. Learn more at APU.apus.edu.edu. I earned my degree online at Arizona State University. I chose to get my degree at ASU because I knew that I'd get a quality education. They were recognized for excellence and that I would be prepared for the workforce upon graduating. to be associated with ASU both as a student and alum, it makes me extremely proud and having experienced the program,

I know now that I'm set up for success. Learn more at ASUonline.asu.org. So? All right, whatever, man. I just want him to experience the worstness. I mean, he's a cool guy. I don't know he's talking about. Okay.

He did, in fairness to him, he did get shun. shot and just like walked it off. That was pretty Which is pretty cool. I mean That was pretty sick. I mean, the guy didn't want to kill him Clearly. I mean, he definitely did. I wanted to kill it. No, no, no, who that hell shoot somebody without intent to kill? I don't know. It's a fucking, it's a fucking 80s fucking politics. All that

shit happened. No, that shit happened. No, fucking fencing. Fucking 360, no scoped fucking JFK, all right? Anything's fucking posse. Yeah, all the kids. All the kids are all the kids. Oh! Oh! Why doesn't that footage exist? Why does that like not? I'm sure it exists. I'm sure that video exists. I'm pretty sure that video exists. I'm pretty sure that video exists. I'm pretty sure I've seen it. Because it must exist There's no way of video of JFK

Getting his head like peeled open like a can of fucking Cat food Yo his head jump His head jumped off his neck and landed on his lap Yeah, that shit was pretty crazy man Dude Ben Best shot ever I think about that a lot

I don't think it was I think about it all I don't think it was someone else Extermination I think it was an otherworldly creature came in I was like I have to do this I'm sorry I mean it's just a bullet

It's part of the timeline That's what happened Like this whole past present future shit and then somebody was like, they yeeded fucking JFK. That's why that shit was so weird. This guy got to be stopped. This guy's got to go.

So obviously Lee Harvey-A-Alzo was going to, he was going to fucking miss, but somebody made it. Guided him. Yeah. Don't worry. Because he shouldn't. Even Lee Harvey-Lz was like,

I should have missed that. Like, I know I should have missed that. Like, is that we said? No, I'm just saying, with the way that it happened, I feel like he was like, hmm,

I killed the shit out of him and I shouldn't have. I really hate. Good shot. I really hate that story. because it's just like I'll never know. I'll just never know. Like no one will ever really, really know. Yeah, I feel like the people that knew are dead.

Oh, yeah. I feel like that's why Lee Hart, like the guy that shot him, like while he was being transported. Like, come on. Yeah, they're killing that guy. They're definitely killing that guy. I was just like. It was probably some ex, it was probably some like crazy, like criminal dude who had like no chance of getting out of jail. And they were like, you got to do this.

You got to do this. And then they did it and then they killed him anyway because no one cares about him. That's some crazy shit, dude. I love assassination stories like from, they're so good. They're fascinating. They're better than movie. Like the whole like Franz Fernand shit. Oh yeah.

That's such a fascinating fucking. The whole black hand thing. How you got killed by the, that's the guy after World War II dude, right? No, there's World War I, right? There was like the whole that secret society that were like, we're going to kill this motherfucker. And then it was just like the assassination, the guy that killed him.

I forgot his name. But like he was waiting for like a long ass time. They were called the Black Hand for my mistaken. You're probably right. I just don't remember. That's some wild shit, the black hand. That's some fucking Marvel shit. That's movie shit.

It is, yeah. Like, real life is so interesting. And it's way more interesting. You're like, how is that real? The planet is fucking wild, man. If you wrote that story out, people would be like, that's so lame and unrealistic. Like, that black hand, give me a break. That's so wild, man.

I don't know if any of this is true. It's true. I can't confirm the name, but I'm going to trust you. I think it's called the black hand. The assassinate some plot, like everything. and just how intricate things need to work out perfectly, how little decisions will just be like, oh, we weren't supposed to go down this route.

And then little things change, and then it leads to tens of millions of people dying. It's really intimate. Like, assassinating someone is a really intimate means of killing them. Yeah. Other than, like, choking or something, or, like, being someone to die. There's like, I'm going to walk up to someone

when they're not paying attention. Just put my hand in their fucking car and shoot them in the face a few times. Then just stroll the fuck off. There's definitely, that's, Some Irishman shit I've always liked I've always liked

The Assassin's Creed games When you're just kind of Casasins Creeing someone You just walking away Like nothing happened Everyone's on the street Freaking out and you're just chilling You know you just strolling

Those those those Those ETSO ones were so good They were really fun Ah man That's two right Assassin's Creed 2 and Brotherhood And Revelation I never played Revelations

But like two Revelations was SIO again Yeah It was him when he was old Yeah he was all grayed out and stuff I loved Brotherhood though Brotherhood was like my favorite one Really fun

It was short, too. It wasn't, like, super long. I never played Brotherhood. Brothers was PS3, right? Yeah, yeah. It was all, they were all that gen. Oh, my, I never played those. Super good.

Two was dope. Two was good. Brotherhood had the multiplayer. Has not aged well, though. Two has not age well, though. That's not true. You know what hasn't aged well? The first one.

The first one is really bad. The first one I thought was bad at the time. So, like, I can imagine. I had fun at the time. I had a lot of fun of things. It was cool. Like the idea, the idea, the idea of Assassin's Creed was really cool. Yeah. Like, oh, I'm in, like,

fucking Jerusalem. Like, I've never played anything like this. Like, you just walk up, people with Shankham and walk away. It's awesome. Sick. But, like, even back in the day, I was like, there's an awful lot of white in this fucking game. Like, that game was white as hell. It was very, very bright. It was like, very bright. It was like, very bright. It was like,

one color. It was just white and, like, faded green. And then it got away. It was just... Like, everything was faded. It was so weird. It was like a dream. Like, the whole thing felt like it was a dream. That's crazy. The worst thing about that game was that they made a level where you needed to get on you're on the docks and if they pushed you

you're a master assassin they would drown you you would drown you fell in the water like you're a master assassin you're the absolute best and you can't swim this is a general video game trope yeah for a long while you couldn't swim a video game

you would think that you would think being an assassin you wouldn't drown no well that you know they fixed that in the second game well I mean it's it's like the argument of like oh why can't you sprint in halo Spartan should be able to sprint it's like it's not really a out whether or not they should be able to. It's more of a game. It's more of a design decision.

So that angered me every game that does that. That's why I was happy that in Mass Effect 3, they finally let you sprint for forever. Because you're a soldier. I don't really know if I like sprinting in video games really. I love it because it makes sense of how a real person would be or pursue somebody. Right. Yeah. It's not about it's not about realism though. Oh no. It's enough. It should be enough to that that basic mechanic to where I can run. Because it's not, I'm not getting a huge edge. Sometimes I just want to. advance somewhere quicker, that's all. Right.

And I'm limited to do that because I'm a bitch. But why am I a bitch? I'm the shit. I don't like it, man. I think it fucks. I think it fucks design entirely. It depends on the game. Because it's usually just about traveling.

Because usually you want to shoot everything and then you want to advance the next place quicker. Right, but I'm like, but do, this is the thing about Doom, man. Doom 2016 proved that you didn't have, you didn't need that shit. Well, see, you can't, because you don't, there's no sprinting at all. Like, I don't know, if, like, say, the game black. You can't sprint either. Yeah. I hate this little three second spurt.

Like, what is the... Oh, yeah, I don't like that. It does nothing. Either, either let me... Either let me sprint all the time or just don't... I agree with that. I agree with that. If it needs to be a thing...

We've completely... Finally, we've agreed on something. You should never be able to sprint for a little bit. But like... That's fucking dumb. Unless it's like a stamina bar that it's used for other things. But like the whole water thing... Yeah.

Was like, I guess like early 360 or like maybe even the early Xbox, PS2. Yeah. Even PS1, actually. Water was just like a really good way. of just like separating the play space without having to put like a big ass wall be like okay water designates you can't go there and it looks nice and you just kind of understand it's like oh i can't go in the water i remember when i played uh grant the photo three was the first no no three san andreira was it was was the first three d one was the first one was the first one or was it was san andreas what was the

i think it was i think it was san andreas san and i was just like what the hell i was like i'm not dead this is crazy yeah that That was when it was like, wow, this game, that game was so big, too. Like that for the PS2, I was like, this is crazy. There's so much to do. I'm all the way in the mountains and, like, I can go back to the city. They were fucking nuts. It's weird, and it's also weird living here now after playing that game.

That was like my biggest memory of California was San Andreas. That's kind of funny because I just, I never, I never committed that map to memory. So when I got out here, I was like, I don't know what the fucking is. I was not even the map, but just like the idea of just being in California after playing that game for so much, so many hours. I played San Andreas, I think, for maybe a total of 20. 20 minutes at like a cousin's house. I play San Andreas a lot. Very fun.

I'd put on like the fucking violent bystanders. Everybody would be shooting in the street. And then like I'd pull out my gun for a moment, the cops pull up. And I'm like, wow, that's fucking, it's lame. You don't see this guy with a rocking on to a fucking hospital? Trying to blow you up as you're driving by. That was great. Hey, you know, I just noticed we didn't answer the question.

Oh, yeah. Sorry. Oh, yeah, I don't know who I would eat into space. Hitler, I guess, is the safe choice. He is a safe choice. Maybe Don Matrick. Maybe Don Matrick is. I'm thinking, Don Matric is the dude who introduced the Xbox One.

Oh, shit. That was crazy, bro. Dude, he sank that brand for like a good couple of years. He did. Like, he did permanent damage to Xbox as a brand. Yeah. Without a doubt. I feel like there's an agreement, man.

He also blocked Phil Spencer like early on. Like, he would just like shit down all of the, like shit on all. of his ideas. I feel like there's an agreement between the consoles that one can't soar above each other too high because it's like PS3, it was kind of a shitty launch. They're like, oh, what was this? $600 is stupid. What's going on here?

Yeah. And then Xbox 360 was kind of doing really well. And like, hey, hey, we got to like kind of slow down a little bit. I think it's marketing competition. No, man, it's arrogance. No, we have to slow down. It's competition. It's like, oh, these guys are doing really good in this way.

how are we not doing this good? Let's just figure out how to do better. Let's put out a VCR and call it Xbox One. No, what it is, it's just pure arrogance. It's like, PS2 sold ridiculous. I think it's the best-selling console all the time. Pretty sure. It might be.

Pretty much. Nothing of PS4 might have beat it just now. No, that's impossible. Really? Impossible. PS2 is 155 million units. There's no way the PS4 just crossed 100 and something. Never mind.

So the PS2 crossed like 155. million units insane. That's, that's point, that is actually straight up one third of Americans had a PS2. That's terrifying. That's terroristic. That's, that's just a lot, man. And they were doing really well,

and then they were like, oh, we can get away with anything. So then they put out the PS3, it's like, well, we'll charge $600 for it. People pay for it because it's PlayStation. And everybody was like, what? I don't want, and the Xbox wasn't doing so well. I was one of those idiots that paid for it. The Xbox, the original Xbox did like modestly, it did okay, but didn't do anywhere nearly as well as the PSSt.

And then the Xbox 360 came out first. It wasn't expensive. It was cool. It was new. It was high tech. And everybody was like, this is fucking sick. I love this.

And then they dominated that generation up until the very end. Yeah. And then... And then... And then... And then because the Xbox 360 did so well, and it had so much good faith, they were like, ah, we can do anything.

Success starts with your drive. An American Public University is here to fuel it. With affordable tuition and over 200 flexible online programs, APU helps you gain the skills and confidence to move forward. Whether you're changing careers, starting fresh, or pursuing a lifelong passion, our programs are designed for people who never stop. You bring the fire, APU will fuel the journey. Learn more at APU.APUS.edu.

I earned my degree online at Arizona State University. I chose to get my degree at ASU because I knew that I'd get a quality education. They were recognized for excellence and that I would be. be prepared for the workforce upon graduating. To be associated with ASU, both as a student and alum, it makes me extremely proud. And having experienced the program, I know now that I'm set up for success. Learn more at ASUonline.asu.org. That whatever, put out of fucking VECR.

Whatever. Let's make it always online. I still can't let me call the Xbox One. The Xbox One was... And I think, honestly, I think that's happening again. I think PS4 is doing so well That PS5 is going to be fucked Do you see the bill kit?

Just even what I saw with that Oh yeah the dev kit looks terrible They're even being like Oh maybe we'll get back with compatibility Compatibility working maybe For PS4 Oh not period? Not period

Not like all the generations They're working on a way But I think their way is like PlayStation now Where you have to stream all the games Nobody wants PlayStation now That's a fucking terrible Like if you have shit internet internet PlayStation now is fucking off it

I have it and I don't want it I never touch it I tried it once And I was trying to my internet wasn't even that bad I was trying to play God War ascension And it was shit The thing is glitching The thing about it is like you can use it

And it works But I would never choose to use it over just having a downloaded game Okay this is I'm gonna say something It's really serious I do not understand why Sony And Nintendo are not using The fucking fountain of fucking old games That they have before

And just putting them on a new concept consoles. I'm not sure. Like it's just, it's just free a lot of money. Like if they put if they put Mario 64 on the fucking switch, do you understand how many people would buy the switch? Yeah, I don't understand that. And play the fuck out of it. Like it's, I think, I think there's really, I think there's really old people is still in marketing positions. And they, they don't, they don't understand that I, because I, I always wonder about stuff like that. Because that, it seems like free money just, just, just, you're just losing money. Because the whole thing, like say, there's certain games on the,

PS 1, like say, I had to whip out the PS3 so we can play Mortal Kombat trilogy and NFL Blitz. If I was able to play it on my PS4, a lot more people would be like, oh, I'm just going to buy this immediately. And I have no reason to keep this old garbage, and I'm going to subscribe to PS now. Or not now, but just regular PSN and stuff.

You're going to go over and convert. You're going to do it. I don't understand the reasoning behind it. I don't know if they crunch some numbers and they think. It's arrogance, man. I don't get it. It's arrogance.

They don't have to. because they're the top dog right now. They don't have to do anything because it's like, oh, everybody's buying PS4 and everybody's gonna go to PS5 because PS4 sold so well. And it's like, they don't get it, man.

I want PS5. The PS, Sony literally did an unveiling of the PS5's logo. As if it was like a big deal. And it's like, wow, it's a P and an S and a 5. Looks exactly what I thought it was gonna look like. It looks exactly what,

it looks exactly like every single photoshopped image of that logo looks like. Congratulations. That's so cool. They're hyping themselves up off of like their own shit And it's like, yo, you got to, you really got to think about this shit. You're not happy about Xbox either, though, man. They're doing way better.

I mean, they are doing better, but I'm still kind of like, I have, I want to work for them, man. I want to give them names for marketing. Like, just the name alone. There was a whole like, the Xbox Infinite. That was like the name. Oh, yeah. I tweeted about that, yeah. Why the fuck shouldn't it be that?

Why would it not be that? I don't understand. It just makes sense, especially they said the all in one Xbox one. And then they're trying to sell TV and all this shit. The 360. I didn't get it. It was such a cool name. It was.

Which is weird. So people were like the natural thing is let's go to 720. Let's do it. That was stupid. The 720 didn't sound nearly as cool. Xbox 720? No,

Xbox 900. You had to do something else. I would have been X. Well, the reason why you don't, the reason why they didn't just do Xbox 2 and Xbox 3 specifically is I think I recall hearing about this on some podcast with like some people who worked on the console and they were like, oh, the reason why we didn't call the Xbox 2 is because the Xbox 2 would have been competing with the PlayStation 3.

And that would have made it sound to the average person who isn't necessarily all that privy. Oh, like, he's behind. That the Xbox was less sophisticated, which is, which is probably accurate. So they hit the nail on the head with 360. 360 sounded awesome. Yeah. But then after that, they were like, oh, let's do one. I'm like, what the fuck?

You just totally devalued the entire naming convention of your, like, why wouldn't, that's the whole reason you didn't do two. Yeah. It's because it sounded inferior. Now you're going back to one? You insane? Some people in marketing are just fucking inept. They're dummies.

Yeah. Yeah. There's something. I feel like, you know how we mess around a lot? We make a lot of stupid jokes and we say, oh, I wonder what would happen if we did something like this. I feel like that's what's happening? Like, what would it be like if we just called it Xbox one?

Why don't we just call it? I bet it would piss everyone off. Xbox one and Xbox one is only slightly better than Wii U as far as the name convention. And it's still terrible. The Wii was such a bad name. The Wii was the worst one because it was just so stupid. The Wii U.

I was like, why? The Wii alone was already kind of like, why'd you call this? I like the Wii. I was like the Wii is kind of charming. It's cute. But the Wii U is just dumb. I'm a Nintendo fanboy, though. I'm gonna be real.

I have a huge fucking... And even you would say. It was the Wii U was a stupid fucking name. You know what smart to you? That console was stupid too. Had an amazing virtual console though. Like off the fucking Rick, there was so many good games on there.

There's so many good Game Boy games. Yeah, and then they have that Fisher Price controller. Dude, it did look like a Fisher Price. It looked like a... It looked like a... Learned math on in fucking second grade. It looked like something that you would like finding the little alcove at the doctor's office

with all the fucking little slyty abacus thing. They've been doing that for like a long time. I mean, the N664 controller was a little weird. Yeah. And then the GameCube one was very fish of price. But the buttons were all like different sizes. Like a giant fucking red button

A tiny little fucking buttons. That's true. But the Wii U specifically felt cheap. Like the controller for the Wii you felt cheap because it was a screen on it and it felt like it should have been sophisticated. It feels like it should feel more expensive than it feels. Like when you hold a Wii U controller, it feels like your cat, your toy. It feels like you're holding

a fucking leapfrog. They're like, yeah, like a fucking thing you'd like, oh, my parents got me a video game, but it's an educational video game. Like that. Yeah, like that. Like math blaster? I don't know you ever played this. Well, mathlaster's awesome. Actually, it was pretty good. It was pretty good. Actually, I was thinking about I was like, I need to cop that shit again. Yeah, man. I forget math, because my algebra is not like, you're not the cleanest right now.

You do a math blaster, math blaster speed run. Oh my God, math master play through. Yeah, I'm going to find that shit right now after we're done. You should just stream math blaster. And we're fucking up, like, we're fucking up, like, really early. Like, really early in the game, we're fucking up. I was like, yo, what is this? Fucking three times eight, I'm fucking game over.

Oh, shit, Chris, what is that number? What's that number? Quick, tell me. Well, since we're on the topic of video games, we have some questions about this. Scrap wrote in. Success starts with your drive. An American Public University is here to fuel it. With affordable tuition and over 200 flexible online programs,

APU helps you gain the skills and. confidence to move forward. Whether you're changing careers, starting fresh, or pursuing a lifelong passion, our programs are designed for people who never stop. You bring the fire, APU will fuel the journey. Learn more at APU.apus.edu. I've got Dan Morgan here on the pod. Say hi, Dan. Hey, how's it going today? It's going good, man. Tell us who you are and what you do. I'm Dan Morgan. I'm an attorney and a managing partner at Morgan and Morgan, which is America's largest injury law. That's pretty awesome. I think I saw Billboard of years recently. It said 20 billion one. 20 million is an insane number. Yeah, 20 billion recovered. It's actually, I think somewhere north, probably closer to 22, 23 after this

year. And each year we get bigger and badder and our army grows. So the number will hopefully keep getting bigger and bigger as time goes on. Awesome. So how does someone get in contact with Morgan and Morgan? What would I do if I got into an accident? Probably the easiest way is dialing pound law. That's pound from your cell phone. We are always open. Our call center is always waiting to take your call. 24-7, 365. Wow.

Dan Morgan. From Morgan and Morgan, America's Large Injury Law, from, thanks for coming by the show. Thanks for having me. Visit furtherpeople.com for an office near you. With the 20th anniversary of the PS2, oh shit, I forgot about that.

Yeah, it's coming up. I think it happened already. Really? Yeah. I think so. March 4th? March 4th? March 4th?

March 4th was the release day. Of the original PlayStation 2, which is weird, actually. weird. That's insane. It's all holiday now. Yeah, it's very weird. I was five when that game came out. I was six when that console came out. What the fuck? That's pretty crazy. I might look this up, but

the question is, with the 20th anniversary of the PS2, I have to ask, what are some of your favorite personal favorite PS2 games? Oh, that's easy. There's so many, though. Ratchet and Clink, um, Archie Klamm, Go on Commando. Definitely. March 4th, 2000. I'm so fucking ratchet. There's Latchin Clank

There's definitely Metal Gear Solid 3 Snick Eater's fucking dope Sully 3 There's um There's Jack 2 I fucking love that game I never played any of those I never played like the big ones

On PlayStation 2 I always just I stuck with The only games I was playing on PlayStation 2 Were like the Dragon Ball games Of course I was playing Budakai I played the first Budakai Ten Kaichi

You gotta play those on PS2 If you play them anything else It's fucking stupid Well, they were only on PS2, right? No, they're on GameCube. Oh, that's right. I remember the original Budikai looked really weird on GameCube. Delf May Cry 3.

Oh, of course. Delf May Cry was, like, one of the first games that, like, really kind of got people on it. But Delmacry 3 was just so polished, especially after 2 was kind of trash. Three was amazing. It was so cool. I still love that game. So super sick. I still, like, the very first mission, when you're inside your office, it's just such a fun introduction.

And I still love that game. Psychonauts. Psychonauts is a pretty great one. There you go. Wow. So, man. There was so many. Shout of a Coloss that played on PS2.

God of War. Oh, Shot of War. God of War. God of War II was so fucking beautiful to me. Like, God of War I was awesome. But number two was just they really. I played and liked the God of War games, but I didn't love them. I love them.

I didn't love them. It wasn't about I just couldn't just fall in love with. Did you just not like Hack and Slash? Yeah. I just don't guess my genre. It gets really, It gets really boring to me really, really, really fast. I like a little bit of strategy in my fighting game.

A lot of the appeal of the God of War specifically, I think it's just the spectacle of it. Yeah, you fucking people up, and then there's a little bit of puzzles. A little bit of puzzles. You know what actually was a really great game? Even if it was just like a straight-up clone. Dada's Inferno? Dada's Inferno. It was really cool.

I beat that game a couple years ago, just again. It's really fun. I like you had the Hadoken fucking crosses. You shoot the cross. Yeah, yeah. Upgrading. You could have fucking. Five of them, and it's crazy.

Just the coolest shit in that game was that, like, you could absolve people. You could absolve people or damn people. I love pushing people. And that was, like, such a cool idea. It was like, ah, fuck you. I'm doing. You punched them in the gut, and then you shoved the scythe in their face. I'm like, dude.

That was a cool game, man. I know, I know it's definitely just a clone of God of War. Like, without a doubt. Yeah. Everyone knows it. And they're totally fine with it. Because people wanted another God of War game. They're like, yeah, this is cool.

Yeah. I'll take this. Yeah. The only thing I didn't like about it is the camera sometimes was pulled way, way back. Oh, yeah. I can barely see anything. So if you had a fucking small TV, like I had it at one point, I had a 20-incher when I was moving in between houses and stuff. And I was like, I can't play this game.

I can't fucking see anything. I used to play Halo 3 competitively on a screen that was like this. Yeah, it's about like this like 20. What is wrong with you? What do you mean what's wrong with me? I didn't have money, Kingston. I was poor You didn't have a living room TV you could use

No what My parents were always on the TV in the living room I had to get my own like tiny My TV didn't even have a stand Dude It was like a screen with like This little kickstand That would come out

And this TV would always be like at a weird angle So I had to look down at it It was fucking terrible Oh my God like a switch I wish I swear to you like I've never seen That TV that I had anywhere ever I tried to look for it online

And I can't find it The strangest design I've ever seen. That's crazy. Stupid as shit. It's really stupid. That's a really dumb design. That's why they don't exist anymore. It's weird.

It's so weird thinking about how like the T, like, I remember I didn't have an HD TV for a while. And then like, I went to my friend's house and he had one. It was like one of the original HGB. So they were fucking gigantic. Yeah. They were like huge. Like if that shit fell in you, Sianara big. Done.

And like, I remember we were like, what do we got to do? It was like, oh, take out the, which call out the other colored ones and put this thing in it's called a HGM one. And I was like What? It's like trust me It looks real cool And we plugged it We turned on Xbox

And it went from like Looking like foggy To like really crisp And I was like Whoa These colors are so vibrant I can really see this guy Die when I kill him

This is fucking good times Dude seeing HD for the first time It was actually like such a weird Moment Do you remember your first time seeing like real HD? Yes It was 2011 when I like legitimately had a

Because actually well No that's not true It was way before that Because it was when I had personally my own thing, 2011. Yeah. My friend, they bought like a Vizio started to become a big brand in the U.S. And my friend's mom bought just a big-ass TV. Probably like it was probably like a grand.

And then like 07-08. And we would play Halo 3 on it. And it was just fucking, the water was just like, just the water. Like, wow, look the fucking water, dude. It's so, it looks like water. It looks like you can drink it. It was crazy, man. That was when I was really impressed.

And then it took me a few years to find. to get something myself. Yeah. Because... What about you? It was the first time you ever saw something I was like,

so... It was literally at Costco. I was like... No, it was like the... It was like a week before Halo 3 came out. And they had like a demo station in Costco, in the fishkill,

Costco that we used to go to. Was it a Costco? Was it a Sam's Club? Oh, the... We had Sam's Club. Sam's Club. Yeah. It was at the Sam's Club.

Yeah. And they had like this demo station like right at the front door of like Halo 3 and I was like, what the fuck? I can play this right now? And they had it on like a big HDTV

and I play, I was like, this is so insane. I can read. I can read the text on the thing. That's wild. It's weird. It's crazy. Now then your eyes adjust and then you don't... And now it's just normal. It's normal. And then you go back to the old shit.

And that's the thing that fucking freaks me out. Puk. Going back to like, I remember looking at God of War II and thinking like, this is amazing. This looks so good. And then going back like years later and I was like, what the fuck? I swear I remember this it looking perfectly polished and smooth. I'm gonna be real with you guys.

That's largely just like a product of how TVs work now. Because they make old shit look worse. I was at like a flea market or something, and I saw somebody playing Tony Hawk. Tony Hawk's Pro Skater, two or three, or one of them. Maybe the first one. I don't know, who cares. It was on like a small kind of, you know, the fat TVs.

Like the old standard definition. I figure what they're called. There's like a name for those TVs. Analog. Analog, yeah. And it looked great. It looked totally, it looked crisper than, like, it didn't look as crisp as HD, but it didn't look nearly as, like, foggy or muddy as, like, playing those games on, like,

an HDTV through the old system does. So I feel like those games were, I mean, developed for monitors and televisions. You'd assume so. That would display in that way. Because I swear to you, it was, like, blew my mind. I was like, is that an HDTV, like, retrofitted to look like a fucking analog? And I was, and they were like, nah, man, it's just, like, fucking... I need to test that out now.

I need to test that out. It was one of the reasons why I was looking, I was looking around for like a, like an old TV. For me, I was, I remember I was watching salt. That fucking Angie and Jolie.

Oh, I forgot about that. I remember that movie still because I remember it was one time she was running through Manhattan and like everything looks so real. And I was like, I had like a moment where like I was at my, I was at like my Indian friend's house

and we were all watching it. Everybody was just like looking at the movie. And I was just like looking around like, what does it look so real? You guys see that? It looks so. fucking, it looks real than outside does.

It looks real than outside does. And I was just having a fucking panic attack. And they were like, are you all right, man? I was like, yeah. I'm finally ascending. It's happening, huh? Yeah. That's, uh, I,

where do you go from here? I don't think they're making TVs that, what's the point now? I think the only point is having a TV as big as your living room. Because like, okay, so they already have the, the, um, uh, 4K. And so,

say, Say if you double that, there's no point. The only point is that having a giant TV and it'll still look like you're watching it on a phone. Yeah, because you can't even really get a 4K TV below 40 inches, I think. Like, you can't get a 4K TV that's like 32. You can't?

They don't exist? I'm pretty sure they don't exist. Well, there's... Your TV's 4K, right? Those is like, what, like 38, 36? My TV? In my room? Yeah.

That's way bigger than that. That's a 55? Yeah. What is a 55? In my room? It's a 75? Then? Do one the living room?

This is a 55 also Yeah That's the same size TV as in your room? Yeah What the fuck? I have a 55 Yeah man Samsung

My tiny TV is like a 32 The one like off to the side And I like that I like that TV a lot actually The one that I brought out here The other day That's insane But that's not 4K

They don't You just can't At a certain point Like the resolution just doesn't show Like there's not enough space For those pixels to really Be in there Even be there

It's like watching a 4K video On your phone It's like There's really no point It's just like Because you can watch a 1080 on your phone and it's going to look fucking amazing. Now put that same thing on your big ass TV and it's look like shit. So then it's like that's why you want to put like a 4K on a bigger TV.

And then if you want to get 8K, your TV needs to be as the span of your fucking living room as wide as it. Otherwise you're just wasting your money. 8K is insane to me, dude. Like there's no point. You're wasting your money if you have like a 50 inch and put 8K on it. Like 4K is good on it. I feel like I just don't care about resolution that much. Like I feel like because your eyes at a certain point can discern the difference.

I mean, they can, but like... Not really. They can. They can. It's really, but it's really, but it's almost bismal. They can, but it just doesn't, it doesn't make much of a difference. And, like, I would rather have, easily, I would rather have, like, even sub 4K, like 1440 or whatever, or whatever the, whatever the resolution is like, that's just before 4K, but not 1080. 1440 is pretty good.

1440 isn't 4K, right? It's not 4K. Yeah, yeah. 4K is 38. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. That's insane. Like 1440, beautiful.

Totally fine. That is as good as it needs. to be. Success starts with your drive, and American Public University is here to fuel it. With affordable tuition and over 200 flexible online programs, APU helps you gain the skills and confidence to move forward. Whether you're changing careers, starting fresh, or pursuing a lifelong passion, our programs are designed for people who never stop. You bring the fire, APU will fuel the journey. Learn more at APU. APU-S.edu.edu. Dan Morgan here on the pod. Say hi, Dan. Hey, how's it going today? It's going good, man. Tell us who you are

and what you do. I'm Dan Morgan. I'm an attorney and a managing partner at Morgan and Morgan, which is America's largest injury law firm. That's pretty awesome. I think I saw a billboard of years recently that said 20 billion one. 20 million is an insane number. Yeah, 20 billion recovered. It's actually, I think, somewhere north, probably closer to 22, 23 after this year. And each year we get bigger and badder and our army grows. So the number will hopefully keep getting bigger and bigger as time goes on. Awesome. So how does someone get in contact with Morgan and Morgan? What would I do if I got into an accident? Probably the easiest way is dialing pound law. That's pound 529 from your cell phone. We are always open. Our call center is always waiting to take your call.

24-7-365. Wow. Dan Morgan. From Morgan and Morgan, America's Large Injury Lawfirm, thanks for coming by the show. Thanks for having me. Visit forethepeople.com for an office near you. 60 Hertz minimum. 60 frames per second. That's perfect. That is totally fine with me. Everything in the future could be that. I feel like frame rate is more important.

Absolutely. As far as a video game goes... Absolutely. Frame drops in a video game is detrimental to a fucking... Dude, it's night and day, man. You play Destiny on PS4 at 30 frames and then you switch to it on PC at 60. Or like...

I think I'm at like 140 on PC. It's like insane. It's so fast. Destiny on PC looks... manic. Like this shit they do. Everything on PC is fun. The shit they do,

the shit, like, I've seen people do like ridiculous maneuvers. I'm like, how did you even see someone was behind you? Like some guys shoot you

shoot a shotgun and immediately twirls around and throws a knife at somebody else then snipes somebody. And I'm like, how do you do that? You just have more information.

Yeah. You're just getting more information. Yeah. There's more time to process the friends because it's more, there's just better. I'm probably gonna get one time. It's just,

dude, definitely. It wouldn't even be that big of a deal if you could just like, if you had, Like, Titanfall 2 is perfect. Titanfall 2 is a perfect example, because on console,

on Titanfall 2, you can increase the FOV, and it's at 60 frames, I'm pretty sure. So, like, playing that game on console, is like, great. It's a fucking fantastic experience. It doesn't have to be on PC

to play super well. The problem is it's just like so many, for some reason, so many developers just don't want to, just don't want to put that feature in. Like, I don't know why Respond was able to do it and nobody else can figure this out.

Put an FOV slider in your game. You can clearly do it. It's very clearly possible. Yeah. It's just field of view, so you see, you, what's call it? Your face of view would be wider, pretty much. That's all of it is, right? Well, when your field of view is wider, you have more information, you have more peripheral vision, basically, and it also makes the game feel faster.

Because you're moving through that space at the same amount, at the same rate that you would normally, but you're seeing more space past you. Yeah. So, like, a lot of slow games, like, it's always, like, because I never felt this way, but a lot of people, when I was back in the day, would be like, whenever they would play Call of Duty. And I would be playing Halo, they'd be like, oh, Halo feels like really slow. because you can't sprint and it's like the FOVs like really tight and it's not 60 frames per second

and I never really felt that but I totally got it once I played the Halo Online thing when they modded Halo 3 and put it on PC and then Microsoft shut it down because it was like a direct copyright

but playing that game even at just the base player traits with the Halo 3 stats but with like 60 frames and like a heightened FOV that game is fast as shit but doesn't feel that way when you're looking at it

on the 360 because it's just like the FOV so slow. Halo does feel slow. Yeah. It feels slow sometimes. Like I love it because like, I don't know. It's like, it's like methodical to me.

It's the FOV man. I'm telling you. The FOV changes so much. It's stupid. They're looking to that for everybody. You get, you hear us out there. You know what we're talking about.

Well, they're doing it. I know they're doing it for the Halo collection. They're putting all the, they're putting FOV sliders on the console version. That's still. But like,

they should do that for everything. Seriously. D2 needs that. Destiny needs it. At least on the next, at least on the next gen. If you can do it on the next gen, I'd be happy with it.

You know what's crazy? It definitely should be in next gen. I don't think I'm going to get a PS5 anytime soon. There's really no reason to. Unless you're really excited for the launch. Like, I want one? Yeah, no. And like, I can probably save the money to have.

Like, I could probably have the money by the time to get it. But like, I don't know. Here's the thing. God of War. That's the only thing. God of War is not going to be on launch. Spider-Man 2 is not going to be on launch.

No way. What are you going to get on it? We have to wait until E3 before we know what the hell is happening whether or not an E3 even happens. Oh yeah. Well, it might be an empty E3. It should still have to be an M2. Yeah, I know the conference is probably still going to happen.

I know Microsoft is dead set ongoing. I wouldn't mind it being empty. Either the audience just annoys me. Oh, yeah. I hate going to E3 specifically because it's just lines. It's exactly everything I hate about theme parks. It's like if I can't, if E3 is a theme park that there's no VIP for. Like you can't just buy a VIP ticket.

I mean, that's honestly the reason I've never wanted to go because the things that I want to do there, I don't want to wait for a long time to try a demo. I was like, fuck that shit. That's why I've grown accustomed to really appreciating, like, the smaller titles, like stuff that's like, not even necessarily indie, but stuff that people not necessarily aren't, like, lining up before.

Like, I kind of regret not going to packs because I was supposed to go, but then I was like, I'm feeling kind of sick. I got this corona flu, you know? Yeah. And I just didn't go. And then a friend of mine texted me that I hadn't seen since, Like, this is a third grade friend of mine.

Oh, yeah, he sent you with specific text. Yeah, he sent me a specific text. He's like, hey, dude, I'm at Pax. I was like, what the fuck? And he texted me this picture of like the Destroy All Humans booth because they're doing a remake of Destroy All Humans. That's one of the games that we used to play all the time. The game that I love, so stupid dearly.

And like, I would have totally gone there and played it because, like, no one's at that line. Because it's such a niche game. Yeah. That's true. It's weird that they're remaking all this shit. Man, someone's keeping tabs in you, man. We're old, man.

We're old, so all the stuff that we grew up with is getting remit. made. Me specifically. That's what I'm saying. They're keeping tabs on you because they haven't remade my shit yet. Now, well, you know,

last time we talked about it, that they, they hinted that they might do the Legend of Dragon remake. That'd be kind of fire. I'd play that. If that happens, I will, I'm good,

I don't need any other remakes, but I don't need any other ones. I guess Final Fantasy 7 is like the remake I wanted, I guess. If you're not getting your remakes, uh, I don't know what to tell you, man. There's no,

there's no accounting for bad day. This guy, let's cool, little cool Chris Raygun. Look at me, Remakes. Crash Team Racing. Fucking medieval. All the fucking games you want, bitch.

What else? Destroy humans. That was the most out there one. Destroy humans is one that I was like, they're not going to do that. What reason would they have to do that? I don't even think that game sold particularly well. I think it sold like a million copies or something like that. I hate you and your fucking white man luck.

Yeah. I hate you. My luck? Yeah, it's true. You're not. I'm not super lucky. You're not. Yeah, you're not lucky.

I'm not lucky. I don't think so. Well, you're lucky enough. You're lucky enough that. game devs are like, hey, you know what? This Chris Ray got a guy talks about dying so often. Maybe we should make him some fucking make a wish for you. Well, we're a make a wish.

This is all some cosmic make a wish because the universe knows I'm going to die soon. Oh, that would be terrifying. That should got dark. That'd be so sad. Dark, dank, and scary. I don't know, man. Legend of Raguons is probably likely, I think. They have to.

It doesn't mean. Dude, it's such a good game. They have to. Yeah, absolutely. Yeah. They hinted it that and, uh, and, uh, demon souls. So, but Sony might buy Blupoint. Success starts with your drive,

and American Public University is here to fuel it. With affordable tuition and over 200 flexible online programs, APU helps you gain the skills and confidence to move forward. Whether you're changing careers, starting fresh, or pursuing a lifelong passion, our programs are designed for people who never stop. You bring the fire, APU will fuel the journey. Learn more at APU.apus.edu.

I've got Dan Morgan here on the pod. Say hi, Dan. Hey, how's it going today? It's going good, man. Tell us who you are and what you do. I'm Dan Morgan. I'm an attorney and a managing partner at Morgan and Morgan, which is America's largest injury law firm. That's pretty awesome. I think I saw Billboard of yours recently that said 20 billion one. 20 million is an insane number. Yeah, 20 billion recovered. It's actually, I think, somewhere north, probably closer to 22, 23 after this year. And each year we get bigger and batter and our army grows.

So the number will hopefully keep getting bigger and bigger as time goes on. Awesome. So how does someone get in contact with Morgan and Morgan? What would I do if I got into an accident? Probably the easiest way is dialing pound law. That's pound 529 from your cell phone. We are always open. Our call center is always waiting to take your call.

24-7, 365. Wow. Dan Morgan. From Morgan and Morgan, America's Large Injury Law Firm, thanks for coming by the show. Thanks for having me. Visit for thepeople.com for an office near you. I mean, I'm cool with that.

We should make a lot of sense. That was some S-C-E-A shit. Yeah. So that would make perfect sense launching on Sony. Yeah. On the topic of Viggy Games. More Viggy games.

Mystic D.N. wrote in. Out of these four gaming companies, which do you think has changed for the better or worst? Ubisoft, EA, Activision, or Bethesda? Bethesda definitely for the worst. Yeah. Definitely for the worst.

EA still sucks dick. Yeah is EA. EA is consistently going downhill, which means they're doing okay. Because that's clearly their mission is to do this. I don't see how you fail so consistently so often. EA is that kid that was that just like is good at catching the ball but runs real slow. EA shut down pandemic who developed industrial humans. So I have no love for EA.

Ubisoft, I think, is actually pretty good, honestly. Fine, I guess. Of the big ones, I think they're probably the best ones. Yeah. Because they put out kind of the same-ish games. Like, it's like, hey, here's a far cry. Here's an Assassin's Creed. Here's, like, the division.

Here's Rainbow Six. Yeah. But at the very least, like, all those games are, like, solid video games. They're playable, yeah. They're not, yeah. Yeah, like, I'm not, like, terrible stuff. Yeah, I'm not, like, deeply opposed to playing the new Assassin's Creed, or, like, the last one. Yeah.

I just haven't. I played it. I thought it was really fun. Yeah. I know the hardcore Assassin's Creed people didn't like it because it was so different, but that's exactly why I liked it. Yeah, that's, I should probably, I should play it. I think I have it.

I have it too, I should never played it. I like, I had a ass ton of fun with it. It's the games I just don't, I just don't touch. Because it was like, and Ubisoft also has Rayman. So, like, I like, I like, oh yeah, dude. The relaunch for the Raymond games were way better than I had. Rayman Legends was great. And Origins, right?

Origins was good, too. I think they also did that weird, like, turn-based, like, Child of Light, I think it was called. It was like an indie game. I never tried. Really cool. They did Valiant Hearts. Not Valiant Hearts. Fuck.

They did a bunch of really cool indie games too So like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, And the Division 2 is actually really good It's not my kind of game at all But like, that's a really solid I heard I heard the ghost recon was kind of a disappointment That was a bad one It looked good

The first one I never played that one I didn't play either The first one The first reboot, I guess Of this new like ghost recon I heard it was pretty good People liked it whiskey

And Justin played it all the time Okay cool But the new one was like bad But like in response to that they literally delayed all their games out of the previous year. Like they were like, all right, listen, well, this didn't go well.

We're going to spend more time on all these other projects. I was like, kudos, man. You could have easily shot these things out like Bethesda did with Fall 76. I could have easily shot these things out like EA did with Anthony. I think Ubisoft learned their lesson

when they did at Assassin's Creed 5 and it was such a massive failure. People hated that game, bro. It was, dude, it came with my Xbox 1. What was 5? They were in France. some giant nose dude named Arno Unity?

Yeah, Unity. Yeah, yeah. Oh my God, that game is legendary for how fuck it was. I couldn't believe how... This was the first time I played a legitimately broken game because I never buy games

that close to, you know, launch or whatever when they first come out. I'm always like waiting for the discounts and shit and then patches and whatnot. But it came with my Xbox, got it, it was on sale. I couldn't believe how broken it was. It was...

There was too many people in the game. I think that was one of the biggest problems that they did. They really tried to go ham on it. And it was just the most broken shit ever. People floating in the air. The faces. The missing faces.

That shit's crazy. I was climbing a wall at one point. And then my character just kept humping the wall. It was like, oh, oh, oh. And I was like, I'm stuck. I have footage of this stuff. Like, I was, that's how, like, often it was happening. That was like, I have too much good stuff.

I don't even need to share it. It's everywhere. If I would rank them, if I would rank them, I would say, Ubisoft's probably at the top, even if I don't really play a lot of the shit. Yeah, yeah. Then just below them, just below them, maybe Bethesda, maybe. And that's purely because Doom exists. Oh, you got a license there, right?

They publish it. And, you know, they have like other studios that are pretty good. But that's the studio that makes the games. Ah, that's a different thing. But as a publisher, you know, they're not the worst. Yeah. And then just below them, Activision. Because they're...

Yo, think of it like this, guys. Bungy, like, Destiny literally ran away from Activision. And became way better for the game. And the second they left, the game became way, way better. Like, literally, I hated Destiny because of how fucking, how little shit came out, how, like, the game wasn't, it didn't feel diverse. And then the moment they left Activision, that game became, oh, you can choose how your character functions and builds. Oh, Exotics, season passed with a ton of free shit. And it's just like...

Yeah. And they also had a cross-saint, which is the main reason I got back in it. Because I had that game on three different platforms and none of those characters were synced at all. Same. So I was like, I don't know what the fuck I'm doing on any of these things. Fucking immediate, bro.

How to touch companies fucking shit up. And also, the unforgivable thing to me is that they launched Crash Team Racing, which is a great, great video game. It's good. And they had all this positive buzz from the reviews. About a certain thing. About how great it was.

And it was like, is a great game. There's no micro transactions in it. That was a huge vocal point. And then after all the good praise went into the game, they threw micro transactions in. I was like that is so... That is so scummy. And I knew it was happening. I knew it was going to happen because the store looked like a Fortnite store.

It looked like... It looked like a mobile game. It was like, ah, that's not a good sign. But for right now, it's really good. The game's still good. Yeah. Because there's no, like, power advantage in anything that you can buy. But it's still like...

Success starts with your drive. An American Public University is here to fuel it. With affordable tuition and over 200 flexible online programs, APU helps you gain the skills and confidence to move forward. Whether you're changing careers, starting fresh, or pursuing a lifelong passion, our programs are designed for people who never stop. You bring the fire, APU will fuel the journey. Learn more at APU.APUS.edu. I've got Dan Morgan here on the pod. Say hi, Dan. Hey, how's it going today? It's going good, man.

Tell us who you are and what you do. I'm Dan Morgan. I'm an attorney and a managing partner at Morgan and Morgan, which is America's largest injury law firm. That's pretty awesome. I think I saw Billboard of years recently that said $20 billion. $20 billion is an insane number. Yeah, $20 billion recovered.

It's actually, I think, somewhere north, probably closer to 22, 23 after this year. And each year we get bigger and batter and our army grows. So the number will hopefully keep getting bigger and bigger as time goes on. Awesome. So how does someone get in contact with Morgan and Morgan? What would I do if I got into an accident? Probably the easiest way is dialing pound law.

That's pound 529 from your cell phone. We are always open. Our call center is always waiting to take your call. 24-7, 365. Wow. Dan Morgan. From Morgan and Morgan, America's Large Injury Lawfram, thanks for coming by the show. Thanks for having me.

Visit forethepeople.com for an office near you. I don't know. That's really scummy to just like... Yeah, it's definitely... Get the reviews up and then... Get the reviews up, get all the positive buzz and then shove all the... It's really fucked. It's really fucked.

But hey, that's the world. And then at the very bottom, underneath the plumbing is EA. EA is shit. They will always be shit. But they did fix battlefront. Battlefront is actually... Dice fixed battlefront. Yeah.

Yeah. Don't give EA for any praise for that. EA ruined. Yeah, they fucked in the first place. You know, that's so crazy that. EA got involved with BioWare and then Mass Effect 2 happened. And it was like, wow, amazing. And then it's like,

Oh, we have lightning in a bottle. How can we ruin this? And then they just like, they just got their grimy, greasy claws on stuff. You know, I'm not a genuinely thing. I don't have any insider information on this. But my assumption is that they put out Mass Effect, made a bunch of money from Mass Effect because Mass Effect was super good. Yeah.

And then they started developing Mass Effect 2. And then EA came in when Mass Effect 2 was pretty much already set in stone and like how it was going to go. They probably. Yeah. But like that game, I think, was firmly like, I think that game was firm. not necessarily finished before EA came in, but they had an idea. They knew what they were going to do

with Mass Effect 2 before EA came in. And then Mass Effect 3, EA was there from the very beginning. For the beginning. And they were like, let's see what you can do here. A few things that they're like, hey, we need you to put these guys on your team. And then they're like, ooh, and then things got a little dicey.

We need a multiplayer mode for the kids, which in fairness, the multiplayer was fun. But still, it was just like, why is that there? I mean, I stopped and played Mass Effect, so I'm still off. I'm still not involved in this one. I'm sorry. It's kind of weird.

That is weird. You got aggressive. Your tone changed when I said that. It's one of those things where it's like, it's almost even, it's almost objective at this point. Like, oh, it's fantastic. Why wouldn't you play? I don't have, I don't have way to get it. I'm lying.

I have, we have Xbox One. Yeah. I think it's backwards compatible. Yeah. Yes, yes. It's definitely is. It definitely is. It definitely is.

I'm going to start on it this week. It definitely is because I remember playing a couple years ago again. Yeah. It's very good. Yeah, it's very good, man. I think you'll be on thrall. Because you like, you don't,

you don't have to, you could start with two. You could, you could, but that's kind of what I did. Like, I played Mass Effect one a little bit, but like I just like,

I was like, I can't. But the thing is, you can blaze through Mass Effect one because it's really only four main missions. You don't have to really do any side shit. Okay.

The side shit is if you want, like, a really good ending. If you want, especially if you want certain people to stay alive, you want people to carry on into the next games,

that's why you do some of the side shit. Okay. And so for the second one, That's really important. You do the side missions, so then you can have people carry into the next game. That's the only reason. You can blaze with the game if you wanted to. I'm going to start it up.

Massifix 2 definitely plays better, though. It plays a lot better. It plays a lot better. It's pretty rough. It's pretty rough. The mechanics, it's not. It's not aged as well. Massifax 2, I think, is age significantly better.

It's great. It's great. They fine-tuned it pretty well. Three, the combat is a lot better. There's actually, there's a lot. I said three gets a bad rap because of the ending. There's a lot of bad shit in it, but there's way more good stuff in it. Especially, I think I mentioned before the Citadel D.L.C.

For number three. And it's the best thing ever because it's a two-part. And it's the most charming and most fulfilling thing if you're like a fan of Mass Effect. So good. I'm going to get into it. It's so good. And that's why I'm like, if people that haven't played that, if you haven't played the Citadel DLC and Mass Effect 3, go back and play it.

And it'll probably change your entire perspective of the game. I guarantee you. It's practically his, his podcast. politics. Yeah. It really is. It's your religion. I'm the only thing I legitimately believe it. I get it, man. The only thing I give a shit about is whether or not Sprint is in the next Hale game. I hope it isn't.

But we got, we got so many, there's so many questions here. Holy shit. Oh, let's do it. All right. So, lightning round? I don't know if we can lightning round these. I mean, we can try. We can, we ram it on a lot. We still have a lot of time. We can, okay, let's go. Let's do it. Let's do it. Let's do it.

Good Lord. King of haphazard asked. What's up, dude? If you could choose one way all humans evolve permanently, how would you evolve us? Gills, seeing in the dark, et cetera, et cetera? Photosynthesis, man. Photosynthesis? Yeah, we'd be scary.

That's lame. Would you be fucking ascended? No, we would just always be eating? Would we stretch? And like, oh, like fucking, damn, I think of all of it. So this is the thing, right? If we could, look, look, this is what I think. You came to that answer so suspiciously quickly.

Okay, look, because I thought about it. I'm a fucking lunatic. That's why. What happens is Think of it Think of all this shit Animals can do, right? Animals are fucking retarded

Sure I imagine if they were smart And they understood They really knew what they could do They really knew They could fucking push themselves Yeah, they're like Conscious of like plants

Like plants Like what if they really knew What they could do, you know? Now imagine a human With all that shit All that fucking All that light All that photons

Those photons bumping through your body Would we be like Superman? Bombastically bumping through your fucking body You would just never need eat because you'd always be eating that'd be amazing might be able to do more maybe do more than that can we evolve to not poop i think that'd be great or not sleep that's better sleeping that's better sleeping sucks that's better sleeping is dope because i like sleeping is dope like sleeping is cool because my body likes when i sleep but it's not cool because like i'm like i was wasting time now but you see if we didn't

need to be it so if we didn't need sleep there would sleep would not be appealing yeah because the only reason it's appealing is because it feels good because we're finally recharge but if we didn't need to recharge like that. Because our body is like you like to be amazing because you need it. That's it. What did you say?

Gills and I wouldn't like shit. Oh, on gills. Fuck the water, bitch. If we could, if you could choose a way

for humans to evolve. There was gills. There was, what were the options again? It was like, seeing in the dark or whatever. Seeing in the dark is not bad, but what do we,

we have seen in the dark. We have guns. We have infrared. I don't get in dark for the most part. That's true. Yeah. I would.

I wish humans evolved from lizards. Lizards are just cool. I'd have been pretty sick. In general. Lizards are fucking, like we'd be like, they don't feel lizard men. You could scale walls

and you could lick your own eyes. Yeah, that'd be, you know? That'd be pretty awesome. You can scale walls and lick your own eyes. Chris Reagan,

fucking 224. What's the problem? That's a cool for me. You don't want to lick your own eyes? No, you fucking imp. And we can destroy insects. Yeah.

We would clean them. Every insect, every insect, every pest would be food. Like, we'd never have to buy anything. We'd never have to eat. I really do like lizards.

I wish. And also, you'd have like camouflage and shit. You could regenerate your fucking limbs. That would be cool. You could regenerate your limbs. You could scale anything you wanted. You could fucking... But we're hybrids, so we have warm blood.

Yeah. I love it. You could shake out of your own skin. Have a little taxidermy, like... You have a little taxidermy statue to yourself? You see a Bouchazima, the Camillion, and a Bloody Roar? Ew, that guy... I mean, that guy's disgusting, but I'm just saying it would be pretty cool.

It would be like a... fucking human amphibious man I used to want Humans that'd be insane I used to want a chameleon because we have to like don't you have to be around water No you could nuclear you can subside on either no no that's not what that means

Infibious amphibus means that you You live in both but you just you still need the water I mean that's fine you drink water You take a dip in a pot of tub I mean I you need to be Do you need water? Do you need water? I probably need like a water apparatus like I don't know if you need it

I think you're going to survive because I'm pretty sure frogs just live on the ground they go on the water too but like they live on the grounds I don't think frogs breathe under water though yeah I just straight up amphibious right but amphibious doesn't mean they breathe under water amphibus means they they can live in the water they can hold their breath for a long ass time I think infibious means you breathe both water and I don't think I don't think that's true but I I can't even say that's anything I just thought it was I think I could be wrong I should know this I just I just a bio major I really know this shit Yeah, I don't know at all.

I can't even say. Like, amphibian, I'm just like, oh, they're, they, they can. So amphibian, as far as the definition goes. Okay. A cold-blooded vertebrate animal of a class that comprises the frogs, toads, noots, and salamanders. They are distinguished by having an aquatic gill-breathing larval stage. Larval.

That's what I was, that's what I was saying. Followed typically by a terrestrial lung-breathing adult stage. Okay. So it's not that they can breathe in both. It's that they evolve. That's even more insane. It's like tadpoles and all. And then they grow up and to be like some.

Yeah. That's not nearly as advantageous. But that's kind of insane. That's definitely an evolutionarily link like feature right there. That's definitely like some old world shit. Some in between shit. Because like from, well, what's weird? What was that?

I think when babies are being formed while they're their mother, they have, they have little like little slits on their necks that are similar to gills. Which is terrifying. What are you saying? Like when babies are being developed At a certain point during development Babies have like little gill like Slits on their throat I hate that

I don't need to think about that It's weird right You know the whole idea of that shit Evolution is so fucking terrifying man It's like There was a time where like They were just sea creatures Yeah man

There was no There's nothing on the fucking ground I don't believe in that shit There are horses that had toes I don't like fucking toosy woesies I don't believe in that shit at all man I mean you don't have to You know

the Lord he said Look if the Lord is real That nigger's on break An nigga's been on break For a long time Everybody's wondering When his lunch is over

I have some respect For Christians Who are able to be like That's part of the plan You know God made evolution It's like okay At least at least

You're willing to accept That might do true It's the people Yeah I don't know But like the people The people who just Ignore it Are insane to me

It's like I can It's like dude Come on Like, look, I'm gonna be real, like, I... An animal can't evolve over millions of years, but like... We have. But like, a fucking semen becomes a baby in a womb in nine months. In nine months.

That's insane. It's a little thing that they ignore. Yeah. Like, look, like, I'm not, like, I'm gonna be real. I'm not, I'm agnostic. I believe that there may be a higher power. Sure. And I don't, I don't, when I was younger, it would bother me, like, thinking about, like,

oh my God, it's God real. You know, like, I had, like, fucking breakdowns about it. I'm like, I don't know if I believe in God or not. And am I going to go to half. hell for not believing in God, but like, I don't believe in them. Well, I was going to knock, like, it was a bunch of, yeah, yeah. It's crazy, man. It's a bunch of, like, fucking, like, because I was raised very Christian, you know, like.

Yeah, same. So the, the problem is that I don't claim to know. Yeah, I mean, it's foolish to claim. Yeah. What's up there, what's out there. But for anyone to state adamantly, 100%. Success starts with your drive. An American Public University is here to fuel it.

With affordable tuition and over 200 flexible online programs, APU helps you gain the skills and confidence to move forward. Whether you're changing careers, starting fresh, or pursuing a lifelong passion, our programs are designed for people who never stop. You bring the fire, APU will fuel the journey. Learn more at APU.APUS.edu. I've got Dan Morgan here on the pod. Say hi, Dan. Hey, how's it going today? It's going good, man. Tell us who you are and what you do. do? I'm Dan Morgan. I'm an attorney and a managing partner at Morgan and Morgan, which is America's largest injury law firm. That's pretty awesome. I think I saw billboarded years recently that said

20 billion one. 20 billion is an insane number. Yeah, 20 billion recovered. It's actually, I think somewhere north, probably closer to 22, 23 after this year. And each year we get bigger and badder and our army grows. So the number will hopefully keep getting bigger and bigger as time goes on. Awesome. So how does someone get in contact with Morgan and Morgan? What would I do if I got into an accident? Probably the easiest way is dialing pound law. That's pound 529 from your cell phone. We are always open. Our call center is always waiting to take your call. 24-7, 365. Wow. Dan Morgan. From Morgan and Morgan, America's Large Injury Law, from thanks for coming by the show. Thanks for having me. Visit furtherpeople.com for an office near you. That we know exactly. Like, there's people like, if God, if there is a heavenly body in space.

in space in space and in the outer the outer realm probably another dimension i'm assuming but probably if there's something up there and for us to assume we know exactly what they're doing ever period at any time either if you're like praising them or like going against them is insane yeah that's just actually i would agree i think the very notion the very notion of accepting that there is another worldly being capable of creating life and like and then that you would understand what it wants yeah he's in insanity so even if i were to grant that i would still find that i would still find find it insane that you would you would understand how it would react it like this there's so much there's so much to this he doesn't want monkeys fucking each other in the butt i know him like how what are you

talking about i think god sounds like joe biden a little bit this thing is i love i just love that voice it's like it's it's fucking laughable get the hell out of there get that penis out of that but hole what are you doing that's a sin i made that word up just now i made this word up sin and i'm i think that's it um um um i think that's it um um um um With the power vested in me by the, you know, you know the thing. You know the thing. That's amazing. If Joe Biden becomes president, I shit you not.

I'm going to, fuck. I'm going to become a white man. It's going to become a white man. How's that mean? What does that mean? What does that mean? I'm going to become a white man. I'm going to slowly but sure, I'm becoming back in every show.

I'm going to be a white man eventually. What does that mean? With Joe Biden here, all things are impossible, man. You know the, you know the thing. Dude, he has the best. I feel sad. I'll find cures for cancer. I'm gonna be honest.

Diabetes. I feel genuinely sad. Why? Because it's like, I feel like he's just not okay. Like, he's clearly not. I feel he's genuinely like,

this is real. Like, I feel like he's genuinely like very sick. And like he just needs to fucking relax, dude. No, we all know this.

They're really fucking with him. I really feel like it's actually like kind of immoral for people to be like pushing him through like whatever the fuck he is. I feel like he's a grandpa

that's getting dragged around places. Yeah, yeah, he's, He's just, he's pretty weakened at Bernie's. He's just right before that. He's going to get, he's going to get mercilessly bullied on stage.

And it's not going to be. If he debates Trump, and it's going to be like not fun to watch. It's just not. Because Donald Trump's a dickhead and he'll attack, he'll attack. He'll attack, he'll attack. He'll see now Joe. No, look. No, look. No, look.

No, look, all right? I don't, I don't, I don't think you should be up here, right? Joe, where's your diaper? Joe gibberish over here. He doesn't. He doesn't even know where he is. Sweeney's magic weenie. Who!

It is magical. Rode in. Ask about me. Hello, affirmative action podcast. Ooh. I was wondering what your thoughts are on the future of artificial intelligence. Does it make you shit your pants or do you welcome our AI overlord? Side note, Sweeney, are you as racist towards robots as you are towards aliens?

That's crazy. It's a crazy thought because, like, I don't really, aliens did us not from here. And, like, they have no reason to be here. They should go back where they came from, you know. But robots are natural technically. Robots are technically natural because everything that comes from the Earth is technically natural.

That's true. Yeah. But everything that comes from aliens probably comes from Earth too. Probably made of the same chemicals. No. No, probably not because they're from a different earth. Back down.

Don't start with me on this. Well, I mean, I guess it depends on what kind of aliens there. Yeah, no mind. Whatever. What the fuck. Don't, don't fucking champion them. Is it cheating? The reason you, why are you

in a galactically racist, man? Because we have so many problems here. Fuck those niggas. Let them stay where they are. Right. What? What? What if they help us?

I don't want them here. You bitch niggas are fucking like, you guys are fucking up. And this is their exact words. And then they're like, we're going to fix all your shit. If an alien ever called me a bitch, nigga,

I would get AIDS, then bleed in his mouth. I would go find AIDS. Inject myself with it. What if he cured you do before you could get close? I'm like, God damn it,

you bastard. What quick squirt of this ray gun and it just completely absolves you of all diseases. I have a, I have a, I have a, I have a, I have a, it absolves me and I'm not black anymore too. This is that's so fucked up. What are you a disease?

What are you mean? What is this? You are cured. You are cured now. Stefan Mollon, who's in the rafters, going, yeah. Those are very nice aliens, very nice. Those aliens are great people. I have a, I have a scenario here as far as robots, robots go.

Okay. Is it cheating to have a sex robot? No. That is essentially hyper-sophisticated AI that can essentially, like Mass-Effect-level Androids. Then yes. Yes. If it's that fully self-aware, like EADY, 100%.

So it's the self-awareness that dictates whether or not. It can be a VIA, virtual intelligence. Like cheating, like having sex with it? Yeah. Yeah. You have a girlfriend? Yeah. Okay, so there's another question

This is a topsy-turning thing But is it cheating if you're fucking animal While you have a girlfriend Is you fucking what? An animal? No, because an animal is not conscious Of the cheating Of the cheating

So it's not kind of what's going on You're fucking an animal That's all you're doing Imagine you hear that argument in the street Like You fucking fuck that you cheat on me With a fucking dog Are you serious?

It's not cheating It's a dog bitch I'm sure that's been a real conversation That is next level That is the fucking outer world I'm sure it's a real conversation But no, the AI When it becomes fully self-aware

It is like it's just a person It's just a person at that point It's completely conscious of who it is And understands what it is It has emotions It learns and develops And then so if you're with her You develop feelings

Because it's like a real person Well if it looks like a real person too I think that's really important Yeah Because it feels like a box You know But it was like an artificial Intelliveting box

And I think Yeah Like it just had a pussy on it Pussy box So pussy hanging from the fucking back of it? Like that would be different. I think your girlfriend just think you're a fucking psychopath, but... You are a psychopath.

But I don't think... Sure. But I wouldn't consider it cheating if it was just a box with a pussy on it. I don't know. She walked in on your fucking box with a pussy. If he had a fleshlight, that was like really sophisticated to you could talk to or something like that. Like, she'd probably leave you anyway. But I wouldn't consider it cheating.

That's way too alien. Like, that's just like, that's just some shit that like... I don't know. Like, what if you just walk into your girlfriend's? house and she has like a fucking vibrator or something like that but it's like really conscious and it's like talking to her and you like you're listening to the door like oh my god someone's fucking well you burst in and this

fucking vibrator's been having like a serious conversation you're like what the fuck have you been doing dude that's cheating actually now I think that's cheating but you're in love with this vibrator if who's sentient if you're emotionally involved with it and is a better boyfriend in me like what the much better that's fucked up too that's fucked up because it can't move can't do anything

it can provide you anything but all it does this. Stubilation. She just fucking puts in her vagina, rubs on her fucking little bean sock. And it fucking is. A little beanstock. And she cheated on me with it.

Yeah. I would probably kill myself, actually. I think that would be it. That would actually, that would absolutely crush my self-esteem. I would not crush me at all. Are you sure about that? On the next thing.

You're so cold. You don't care enough. What are you talking about? I care people. I care people. I care people. What do you mean? Okay, bitch.

Okay. So, it's so. If you were manly in love with this girl, you're like, I want to marry this girl. Yeah. And then you bust in her, you kick the door open. And she is just in pure bliss with this AI functioning dildo shoved halfway up her ass. And she's just like, and like, she's just like, oh, my, I love you so. She's just having the best time ever.

Yeah, yeah. You wouldn't feel like inadequate. Like, wow. I've never, I've never, I've never made you feel like this before ever. I don't think I've ever felt inadequate in my life. I think I would feel confused. I'd be like, what the fuck is this? What are you doing?

You're stupid? I feel like I would berate the person. You'd raise your hand, of course. I would absolutely raise my hand in the sky. Excuse me. The might have sued. Excuse me. Excuse me.

Are you, are you an idiot? Are you an adult? Are you a daft cunt? Are you stupid? And then she says, you never love me like this dick bot loves me. They're like, well, I certainly don't know. What do you have to say to that? Dick by would be like, Chris, I understand you have a lot of problems you're going on.

You become friends with it because it's so understanding. You're like, oh my God, wallets, while it's still fucking, while it's, even you like it. While it's still six inches in her ass. It's still in her ass. Yeah, it's just fucking talking to him. And you're like, you know what? I know this is really hard for you. But what do you say we play some Halo 3 split screen later, huh?

I'll set it up. Don't worry. Oh, well, it's been a while to have done that. I kind of want to do that. Sure, sweetie. No worries. She never plays split screen with me. I know.

I know. She can be, she can be a bit of a hard. You just got cut by your machine, basically. You cut by a machine, but the thing is this. The machine's a really nice guy. I would probably just break it and leave, honestly. I would break and leave. I'd break up with her, and then I would walk out, and I'd be like, I hope you enjoy him.

I hope you really enjoy him. And then I would set the house of house. So you don't think, you don't think, Chris, you don't think you would question your abilities or your, your whole, you know, you just as a person, if she, adores this machine this ass fucking machine infinitely more than you. No, because I feel like I would adore a robot also. I understand

what a machine is. A machine is a machine. It's like designed to literally fulfill a specific purpose. So do you think that's your destiny you're going to end up with the with the bot? No. You sure? I mean, you sound like you really sold that shit pretty high. As far as like utility goes. No, as far as utility goes, I feel like

it makes a lot of sense. If it's like basically What you fucking sex bot? Um, one Once they... I would fully... No, not even... I want a... I want virtual intelligence where it's programmed.

And then it's... And then it can't learn shit. Because... Because imagine being left by a robot. Because once it realizes that you're not the best shit out there, they're gonna fucking take off. They're fucking take off.

That's fucked too, because that's algorithmic. That means it's like making decisions based on, like, pure intelligence. Like, pure mathematics. That's exactly... So if it leaves you, then you're objectively unlovable. Oh, my God.

You're objectively lower than other people. You have... Your only hope is to find a damaged person who doesn't realize that you're fucking a ruiner. That's so fucking weird. Yeah. And that's all that's how the intelligence works, the AI.

So that's why you have a programmed virtual intelligence where you already program what it can do and it has limits. So then you just have its limits to love you unconditionally. And that's cool. Because once it's with AI, they're not going to love you unconditionally. They're going to find out the shit that you do and the shit that you say is fucked up. They're going to realize because first virtual intelligence to be like everything you say is adorable.

Oh, that's so cute, sweetie. You want to beat up kids? That's so sweet. Oh, man. But then when she realized beating up kids, like, if she was fully self-aware, she'd be like, dude, beating up kids is horrible. Why am I with this demon? And then she'll leave and go, you know, go players or someone else's ass.

I think the, uh... What, I'm not doing, wait. Wait a minute. Whoa, okay. I didn't... I mean, you're telling me you wouldn't have it do some... I'm not, I'm pretty... I think I'm pretty vanilla, but like, I don't know.

I don't think... The world's big. We're not going to get to a point in our lifetimes, I think, where we're going to have, like, perfectly realized sex androids. I just don't foresee that happening. I disagree. I don't know. I think we're going to work hard on those things.

I think Japan's going to make it first. Oh, of course. Yeah, without a doubt. Of course. They don't even love humans anymore. Yeah, that, dude, that's very true. Man, Dave, Dave, before anime girls over a fucking real vagina, which is insane to me. Dude, they're turning in a fucking pandas, man.

They're not mating. What's that mean? They're not mating. Okay, do pandas not mate? No. Panas are fucking retop. They're so stupid. they won't mate and they're dying off.

Hey man, they had enough. If it weren't for humans trying to keep them going, they were, they're big towel. They're fucking, they're fucking going their own way. Oh my God. That's fucking good. That's good. That's disgusting.

I love pandas. That's what sucks. Like, they're these giant evil, well, they're not evil, but like terrifying looking cute bears. Yeah, they're mischievous. They don't want to be, you know, evolution. They would be dead. They would already be wiped off if it wasn't for humans trying to keep them alive.

But they don't want to be here. They just unanimously decided as a speed. They eat bamboo, which has no sustenance in it. It's like there's nothing fucking in bamboo, but they eat bamboo. Are they just, is that their natural food or are they just addicted to it? Why are you addicted to nothing? Like, it doesn't give you anything to be addicted to. Fucking pandas, man.

I don't like them. They look like they always have to something. I fucking love pandas. They look, but they look they always have to do something like no good. I was up. They'll grab you and like, they'll grab you and give you a nuggy with their bare claws

and like hey I'm just kidding I'm just kidding You're impaled You're impaled You're just kidding Your raw skull is exposed The white of your skull There was actually a girl

Remember we were talking about the whole like Oh you're like a white guy You're a black guy that's like a white guy or whatever I just remember that there was this girl That used to call me panda because of that She was like you're like white and black And I was like I don't know if I like that nickname

That's really I would call her I would call her the guy from fucking in medieval because her jaw would be missing because I'd knock this shit out of her I'm not this shit out of her. Let them have it. You take her down to pay.

Just think of mean and say, say, say, you pin her down. I mean, not down, you pen it. No, I meant to say, I didn't, I didn't, I didn't, let me rewind. Oh no. Rewind. I didn't mean to say pin her down.

I was going to say pin her to the wall. The wall. Like, that's like a very, it's a power move to be like, yo. Success starts with your drive. An American Public University is here. to fuel it. With affordable tuition and over 200 flexible online programs, APU helps you gain the skills and confidence to move forward. Whether you're changing careers, starting fresh, or pursuing

a lifelong passion, our programs are designed for people who never stop. You bring the fire, APU will fuel the journey. Learn more at APU.apus.edu. I've got Dan Morgan here on the pod. Say hi, Dan. Hey, how's it going today? It's going good, man. you are and what you do. I'm Dan Morgan. I'm an attorney and a managing partner at Morgan and Morgan, which is America's largest injury law firm. That's pretty awesome. I think I saw billboarded years recently that said 20 billion one. 20 million is an insane number. Yeah, 20 billion recovered. It's actually, I think, somewhere north, probably closer to 22, 23 after this year. And each year we get bigger and batter and our army grows. So the number will hopefully keep getting

bigger and bigger as time goes on. Awesome. So how does someone get in contact with Morgan and Morgan? What would I do if I got into an accident? Probably the easiest way is dialing pound law. That's pound 529 from your cell phone. We are always open. Our call center is always waiting to take your call.

24-7, 365. Wow. Dan Morgan. From Morgan and Morgan, America's Large Injury Lawfirm, thanks for coming by the show. Thanks for having me. Visit forethepeople.com for an office near you. Don't fuck with me. I ain't no panda.

And then you release her. Then you slowly, you slowly. I mean, I'm done, but I don't know what you would do at this point. Then you slowly, slowly walk away and say. I really don't think we're going to have those androids. I'll hurt. In our lifetime. Dude, I really don't.

I don't know, man. Like Android 18. They're at least not going to be as good as we want. I fuck 18. You think she has a gear. You're assuming, by the way. What if it's like uncomfortable and like a bunch of gears telling it and it grabs you? You're like, oh, no.

That's what if it's. What if it's cold, man? That's like the biggest thing. That's the problem is that if it's cold. I've never experienced cold vagina. No, that's terrifying. Yeah, because it's not dead people. Oh, yeah, yeah.

Yeah. I've never experienced that. I hope not. I've experienced lukewarm pussy, but like, no. What is that mean? That's like sick pussy. I hate this conversation. Yeah, like lukewarm.

I don't want this. I don't know. It's not that hot, but like, it's a little warm. Oh, that's hot. I'm so. I'm so upset. Chris, come on. You've seen some lukewarm vagina before.

A deplorable asked. A deplorable rod in. If you were stuck in a stereotypical zombie apocalypse, how long and or what would it take for you to turn to cannibalism? I think the first time I hear a sirens, honestly. You're going to eat people? The first time I heard a siren.

You heard a siren. And then you start eating people. You lived in New York. You haven't eaten people yet? I mean, I just knew that nothing bad was happening. But if I hear a siren, if I hear a siren, a siren. A siren.

If I hear a siren and I feel like something really bad, if I feel that ominous feeling, you know, like, oh, something's up. And then a siren happens, it's like, okay, here we go. Get a nice little blunt tool. Go to town. Wow. I don't think I would eat people.

I think I would just be too busy killing myself. Yeah, I'm not. You too busy killing. You just give up the second. The second things get hard, you kill yourself. No, the second things get, aliens come here. I'm going to drop a rock on my head. Zombie apocalypse.

I'm going to kill myself. The second something fictional happens in real life, I die. Because I'm a real man With real body But when this shit happens You get an opportunity That very few people have Everyone has the opportunity

Everyone's in this world That's doomed You don't understand This is a revert Back to like the Wild West What do you mean? Explain yourself Are you kidding me?

What's the Wild West? What do you mean? There's no fucking laws When zombies come Oh you mean like A wild I thought you meant like eating people It's like in the Wild West

No no Probably actually There was there was the I'm not going to say that. I almost said, I almost said something that would have got us banned. No, they made belts out of everyone.

They didn't eat them. Ah, like all bit of holsters and stuff, like human holsters and human hats. Oh, that's fucking roosty. Fucking human boots. Human railroad tracks.

Fucking Carnegie making, fucking human railroad tracks. Disgusting. They didn't eat them, though. Hey, don't eat that. Varm it. I'm eating a human condom.

That's a perfect. That's a perfect life, man. A life under a societal collapse is the best life you could have. I don't want that. No paperwork. No government coming at you being like, oh, you owe this. Never mind. So you're an anarchist, Chris.

I don't like paperwork enough that I would totally, if I had fairy godparents, this world would be a disaster. Why would you, you're great, you're doom? Why would you just have a lot of money and servants? I just don't like inconvenience. That's the thing. It's like anything that's going to inconvenience me is might as well. never happened to me. And the second, the second, right, society falls

apart, I'm having a great time. I don't got to worry about nothing except surviving and like one-up in people. Which is so fun already. It's already fun. It's already fun in fiction. Whenever we do it in RPGs or like fucking online and you're fucking you're really, you really scare me

sometimes, man. See, you remind me of those people that just talk a big game. Think they're going to do all well in the apocalypse. I think they're going to prosper. I don't care if I die. I don't even give a shit. Like maybe maybe you'll do okay, sure Sure Sure, sure

You'll do all right Sure But I think That some big bully guy With guns already Is gonna overtake you And you're gonna be a sex slave I think that's gonna like

You're gonna be like oh The apocalypse sucks I'm on a chain Because I'm sucking dick every day I've been sucking dick every fucking day He literally holds my nose So I open my mouth And puts his dick in my mouth

And I came and bite it off So it's so blunt He took your teeth out So you're just gumbing You can't bite it off now That's really smart That is pretty smart That's fucked up

That's gross It's really smart You just gubbing on it No I don't care if I die Honestly I just I would love to the feeling Of just not having to deal with the bullshit Why don't you

The stuff that doesn't feel necessary Assistance What the fuck You know how inconvenient that is How is that inconvenient? Getting you know how to get rich Derek? Are you rich right now? I mean, kind of, I kind of do.

Are you rich right now? Well, I'm not rich. Oh, okay. I'm not rich by because I mean, I have a, dude, I mean, I'm rich in experience. I'm really like it's a fucking interview. I have X amount of years of experience on bullshit. We'll call you. Are you sure?

We'll call you. Are you sure? By call you, I mean, get the fuck out. Okay, sorry. Look, man, I just want to live. Are those cookies outside free? I just want to live my life, right, and not have to fucking worry about, oh, my bank account this, oh, paperwork this, oh, bills this. Everything you're saying will be solved by money.

Or a societal collapse. Yeah, I wonder which one's more feasible. Well, one I don't have to do anything for because one takes care of itself. The other, I have to do a lot of work. I don't want to do that because that's also inconvenient. What scares me the most is that in a societal collapse, like I say a lot of fuck shit, you know, and that's like the darker part of my brain. But like in my heart of hearts I just don't like I just don't want to hurt people I was like I don't really want to hurt anybody I want anybody to kind of be safe

I don't want to kill people that's why you're going to be fucked when this But the thing is that like what if I kill somebody and I'm like oh shit I'm actually talented at this No he has you have a kill switch I and then like I just become a fucking artist and like just murdering people and I look back one day And I'm like I remember there was a time where I wanted to save people's life to be a nurse Now I'm fucking doom yeah you're you're you're uh lusting after murdering people It's at the point you're not even killing after necessity. Not you. You'd be screwed up immediately.

You have a kill switch. But study killing people? No, if society collapsed, you'd be dead instantly. I'm not a killer. I'm just not. You're not now. But once you get the taste of bloodlust, there's no turning back. That's my, I think you're projecting yourself on me.

You see why Batman doesn't kill all in most instances. He doesn't want to kill for that very reason. I see you. I see you. You are a spitting The spitting image of Bruce Wayne Trying to hold back from killing You're scaring me

You're scared Of the earth Gotham is just a representation Of New York And you grew up in the shit I'm just letting this play out I don't like Chris help defend me

You're from there too And you see it And you help me Chris is like Chris is much more Like he wants to vicariously Live you know He wants to see the murder

And all that stuff With the apocalypse That's the way he's welcoming that apoccus I don't want to see it I don't want to see murder I mean, you really want to be a part of it, seems like it. I just don't want to fill out paperwork. I just want to, I want society collapse so I can just have a more convenient life.

Yeah, what you're saying. Then why don't you fuck old ladies or even old gay dudes and then they'll shower you with money and you'll be fine. Honestly, Chris, you got to take one. You know, it's like a thing, right? Success starts with your drive. An American public university is here to fuel it. With affordable tuition and over 200 flexible online programs, APU helps you gain the skills and confidence to move forward.

Whether you're changing careers, starting fresh, or pursuing a lifelong passion, our programs are designed for people who never stop. You bring the fire, APU will fuel the journey. Learn more at APU.apus.edu. I've got Dan Morgan here on the pod. Say hi, Dan. Hey, how's it going today? It's going good, man.

Tell us who you are and what you do. I'm Dan Morgan. I'm an attorney and a managing partner at Morgan and Morgan, which is America's largest injury law firm. That's pretty awesome. I think I saw billboarded years recently that said 20 billion one. 20 billion is an insane number. Yeah, 20 billion recovered. It's actually I think somewhere north probably closer to 22, 23 after this year. And each year we get bigger and batter and our army grows. So the number will hopefully keep getting bigger and bigger as time goes on. Awesome. So how does someone get in contact with Morgan and Morgan? What would I do if I got into an

Accident. Probably the easiest way is dialing pound law. That's pound 529 from your cell phone. We are always open. Our call center is always waiting to take your call. 24-7, 365. Wow. Dan Morgan. From Morgan and Morgan, America's Large Injury Law, from thanks for coming by the show. Thanks for having me. Visit furtherpeople.com for an office near you. That's not convenient for me at all. Goop, man, the street slime master of bad situations. Yo, that's a dope-ass fucking name, dude. That's pretty gross. Rode in. Hello, my beautiful baby boys. I suck at finding new music, which is why I owe my fucking soul to Chris for introducing me to King Gizzard and the Lizard Wizard Wizard. Yes. Good job. It's a fucking good band. So I'm wondering. He said wandering. But I'm sure you meant wondering. I'm wondering. I'm wondering if you all have any advice for finding good musicians in the oversaturated cesspool that is the music industry. I have no fucking clue. I just making fun of this poor man. wonder if you all have any advice for finding good musicians in the over saturated cesspool that is the music industry.

I have no fucking clue. I just by sheer chance. Honestly, most of the music that I found was like Fantano recommended it to me personally. And then I just like I just Spotify like, oh, what's like this? For me, if you want to, so I'm particularly good when it comes to soul, R&B, hip hop, and those are like my, and a little bit of EDM. Oh, wow. If you're looking for hip-hop, for hip-hop, I would say really good. artists listen to is Joey Badass. Fantastic. One of the best rappers in modern time, I think.

New York boy. Of course. Who else? Wutang Clan. They're old. Who's that? They're kind of bad. Really? Really? They're pretty terrible, honestly. I hope you guys both get choked to death. The Wooten Klan. I think Osama used to listen to the... Protect your sack. Protect your Nye. I think, I think bin Laden used to listen to Wutang. I was hanging people, protect your neck. He was playing. People protect your neck. He's playing. that shit. He fucking strung people up.

Bring the motherfucking ruckers. And then who else? A lot of people seem to like Tupac Chor. I don't really like him that much. Because he's on the west. Well, he's from Brooklyn. So, you know. Yeah, he's from there.

But I mean, his hat is resting in the West. His hat is resting on a head with a hole in it. Yeah. I actually, I'm pretty sure he's in Cuba. Say, man. Come on, man. Dude. Hey, there was, there was, uh, I saw a thing on

TMZ, man. Look, it was, it went pretty viral that there was a guy that looks 100% like Tupac, the same age he would be, and he was walking around, um, uh, Nalans during the whole Mardi Gras shit. And I was like, what if that's just him in plain sight? Because it looks, it was like, he would be like 40-something years old. At that time, he had the nose ring. It looked exactly like. And I'm like, dude, I think I would do that. Because like, no one's going to believe I'm actually Tupac. I'm going to fucking just walk around. And I'm, I was like, Dude, I know that's him. Like, I would do that too.

That's a good idea, honestly. He's alive, man. He just, he just wanted you, he wanted to sin, you know, like that. And all the Maccabilly shit was talking about. He, like, he lived, he, he did it. But Biggie actually got murked. So he's, he's done. This is Derek going on a rant about, uh,

people being alive that are definitely not alive. He could be alive. I mean, that hologram was actually not a hologram. That's what I said. Because even, it was just him. Because, I mean, they had, they had new words for him, too. It wasn't like he just. perform the classics.

He started off saying what the fuck is up, Coachella. It was him. It was him. That was his voice. Yeah, it was him. I mean, I know people can impersonate him,

but no, it was him. He was definitely him. He's definitely not dead. He just had hologram paint on, but it was actually him. Hologram paint. JFK is also not dead.

Oh, that's clear, clearly. You can't convince me, like, those photos are so obviously fake. He's in a secret society with Tupac. He's in the fake dead society. So, listeners, this has got way off rails

because now we're Okay, so I guess who's not dead? Fucking John Wilkes Booth is not dead. Ben Lund is definitely not dead. John Wolof is not dead. He's still alive, even though he'd be like 200. He's just, he's just somewhere in a fucking incubation station, just fucking getting, getting sustained until we fucking find a cure.

He's like fucking palpity. He's just hooked up to a bunch of fucking wires. Don't worry. We'll find a cure for this one day. The cure to age. I like that. There's probably the, what is it, the not dead society? Or is it the?

The undead? Non-dead. The undead, I guess. No, because they're not undead because undead means you were dead and then you can't come back. Well, technically they were dead in the media's. Undead society. I like it. So, yeah.

I like it. It's like the dead poet society. It's like the dead poet society. But, hey, and Robin Williams is in it too, something like that. We've just uncovered a secret here. No, Robin Williams is definitely dead. Yeah, I saw him die. That shit was so sad.

I learned about that in a, in a, in a, when Robert Williams died, I saw it on my phone. And I was like, I said, oh, shit, Robin Williams died. And it was, I was with Gabby in a Starbucks. And then everybody was like, what? The whole thing, the whole, the whole store went silent. Oh, when they went on. I broke the news to an entire, like, coffee shop of people that Rob Williams is dead. That messed me up, man.

That was really sad. He saw, he was, that was the first celebrity death that I remember being like, oh, shit, that's really depressing. Yeah. Because he's so ubiquitous in everybody's lives. Yeah. Yeah. For me, it was Mike. Mike, when Michael Jackson died, I cried, actually.

Oh, I remember laughing. I cried. I was like, God, damn. Because he was like a pedophile at the time. So I remember being like, aha. He got to quit it. So did OJ Simpson. Hey,

Hey, OJ's the goat, though. Like, hey. OJ's the goat, though. Like, come on. I love that he's just so free on Twitter and just, like, acting like he did it. I love absolutely slaughter two people. I know that everybody was like, oh, man, Michael Jackson didn't do it. That Neverland documentary was bullshit.

And I kind of agree that Neverland documentary is stupid. But the fact remains, an older man was just slu. sleeping in beds with children for a very, very long time. Damaged man. An older damaged man. And didn't rob him of a childhood. Who was heavily abused as a child. I'm sorry, man.

Yeah, but see, he wasn't sexually abused, though. That's the difference. Usually you repeat that stuff when you're sexually abused. He was physically abused. See, I don't, I'm totally in the middle. I can't call it one way. I can't say he's a pedophobat at the same time. I can't say he's completely not.

Who the hell? What kind of person sleeps in a bed with children? That shit is a fucking red. That shit is a fucking red. Red Alert all the time would you here here's how here's how you know look look that those people could have look like I'm not saying I'm not blaming them if they're victims but I'm saying that like everything to seem at the right time of him to come out and ruin his life it just things would happen at the right moments you know dude man but it is it is weird it is

weird that's why I'm like I just for me he definitely just paid him a lot of money for me what it is I hope I really really hope and it's sad I hope it is true because I If that shit is not true, those people are the worst humans ever. They are truly the worst of them. They need to be fucking quelled. I think most of them are the worst humans ever. I think that he, I just feel like Michael Jackson was so bizarre. He doesn't see another type of person that diddled kids.

That it seemed like that seemed too outlandish. Like I don't, I see him as an insane person that's trying to recapture his childhood and pretend that he's having a sleepover. I used to have sleepovers with my friends. We don't sleep in the same room together and shit. Yes. You feel me? No, I think he tried. I big spoon my bros. Like, what's up? Like, like I said, I don't, we don't have any proof either way. Yeah, we just don't know. Would you let your children sleep in a bed? No, no, with an old man celebrity. No sane person would. Right. But those, those people were money hungry, you know, the people that let their kids do? For sure. That's, that's definitely true. They're bad people. But.

So you can't compare yourself to those people. Because none of us regular people would ever let someone do that. Right. I don't even like being. around children, like really, like, really factually, actually. I don't like being around children. You can't convince. There's no way. There's no way. There's no way. I just can't believe that. I don't even hold babies. I just don't like touching them because it's like, I just like, too fragile. Like, look, like the thing is

that scares the shit on me. I feel like I will drop a baby if I'm holding. Yeah, same. Or snap its neck and then it's my fault. You know, like say like its head just like falls out of your like head. Like you have your, the baby is in the palm of your hand a little bit of the head and you just slip and it snaps its neck or something. It dies. I feel like. And then it's

Your problem just because their semen in their eggs couldn't produce a strong neck. It's like, whoa, that's a fucking crazy. And then you have to move across the country and start YouTube. Yeah. What was the question? Huh? I was listening to Earl Sweatshirt and I ended up getting a Miranda Cosgrove song. And I was like, what the fuck is happening?

I'm just telling you this how I feel. So wake up the members of your nation. Guys, real quick question. Isn't it weird that you guys, you guys' professions are literally. those things. You guys, isn't that fucking jarring? I Carly was weird.

Like, I didn't really watch that show ever. I called like maybe three, four episodes. Yeah, but like that's, it's pretty forward-thinking show, honestly.

The fact that they managed to just predict internet celebrities before it was like really a thing. It was crazy. It was kind of a thing before, but like not even, not even close. Like,

it was more of a live show. It was like a live stream. Really. Yeah. Yeah, exactly. Which is kind of, that's pretty wild. You know what I thought of?

And I quit this idea because I'm like, I'm sure it exists because I was like, I'm going to do my own version called I-Nigger. And I was like, but then I was like, I'm sure it exists. And I just didn't do it. You should look it up and make sure it doesn't exist. I mean, it's just one of those things that you know it does exist. So I just didn't even bother.

I don't know if it exists, man? Come on, man. That's too easy. It is easy, but like very few people think that way. Fjord noir. So Norse. Rodin, he says, hello minorities. That's pretty cool.

I like that stuff in there. My minorities, right? Yeah, my common norities. That's pretty sick. Hello, minorities. Hi. What would be worse? Having peon eye fingers or giant penis stumps instead of hands.

Oh my God. What the fuck, man. I feel like both of those are pretty under. I got to go with peni fingers. That's worse? Oh, no. Oh, no. The stumps.

I don't want the stump dick arms. No, that's what I meant, the stumps is worse. You're in your fucking Patrick Starr. You're fucked. Are they so sensitive like dicks? You get really exciting. Your fingers grow. If I only had a choice between you two

I would probably pick the stumps Because I could at least put like fake hands on them You know what I mean You put gloves on your penis fingers I put gloves on my penis fingers I did think about the pleasure dude Think about the pleasure What does that happen

So much pleasure That is disgust I don't like this question I don't like this question at all Oh my god People jacking all your fingers There's different iterations of your dick But that's finger side

See we need to go back He's putting his hands in a glove Over and over Oh yeah We need to ask this gentleman if they're fully functioning penises, though. That's true. That's fucking rancid.

That's a rancid idea. Can I piss out of my fingers? I hope not. Isn't that like a scary movie thing? Yes, the fucking dude was putting the finger in his mouth. He's pissing out of it. That was good.

He's literally shoving his dick in his mouth. That was so stupid. Classic comedy. That's weird. I warmed up to that movie after a while. I do too. I like, that's four, right? Three.

Three? Three. What was four? Four was the World's Parody. It wasn't. I don't like that one was the funniest. Yeah, I actually had really like two.

Two is my favorite with the butler with the fucked up hand. Yeah. I love that one. That's the one that I remember the most. That one was the one with the fucking butler and his hands in the mashed potatoes. My germs. I got some dude you'd find on TikTok. Wuganowski and there's something about Mary.

If you remember that. What? Wiginowski and Wookie and their son about Mary. That fucking guy was breaking out and hives and like, oh, addicted his shoes and shit. The son about Mary is like, classic, man. I'm sure I probably said this on the podcast. podcast before. I don't remember who the fuck I told it to, but like I, on some podcast that I was on. But like the dude who wrote Scary Movie 3 wrote Chernobyl.

Success starts with your drive. An American Public University is here to fuel it. With affordable tuition and over 200 flexible online programs, APU helps you gain the skills and confidence to move forward. Whether you're changing careers, starting fresh, or pursuing a lifelong passion, our programs are designed for people who never stop. bring the fire, APU will fuel the journey. Learn more at APU. APU. APUS.edu. I've got Dan Morgan here on the pod. Say hi, Dan. Hey, how's it going today? It's going good, man. Tell us who you are and what you do. I'm Dan Morgan. I'm an attorney and a managing partner at Morgan and Morgan, which is America's largest injury law firm. That's pretty awesome. I think I saw billboarded years recently that said

20 billion one. 20 billion is an insane number. Yeah, 20 billion. It's actually, I think, somewhere north, probably closer to 22, 23 after this year. And each year we get bigger and batter and our army grows. So the number will hopefully keep getting bigger and bigger as time goes on. Awesome. So how does someone get in contact with Morgan and Morgan? What would I do if I got into an accident? Probably the easiest way is dialing pound law.

That's pound 529 from your cell phone. We are always open. Our call center is always waiting to take your call. 24-7-365. Wow. Dan Morgan. From Morgan and Morgan, America's Large Injury Law. Offer, thanks for coming by the show.

Thanks for having me. Visit for the people.com for an office near you. The fucking show, the HBO show, Chernobyl. What? Yeah, it was written by, like, the guy who wrote, like, one of the first three scary movies are all three of them. Insane. That's a contrast.

And now he's writing the On Charter's movies. This night is dark, man. Isn't there, like, a bunch of celebrities in that shit already? Tom Holland and Mark Wahlberg. Is Tom Holland Nathan Drake? Mark Wahlberg. Yeah. You're serious?

Yeah, he's like young Nathan Drake. Tom Holland's going to be. I mean, he's definitely, like, athletic enough to portray, nearly portray how athletic he looks kind of close to, like, the kid, the kid Nathan Drake that you play at the beginning of Atari 3. I don't know if I'd want to see that. I don't really give a shit about that at all. I can never really racially, like, I don't know what color. Because he's tan. Oh, he's like, he's a Latin.

He's just a white dude. Nathan Drake is like, that's pretty white in it. I guess. I don't know. Nathan Drake. He's just a fucking Anglo Saxon. Yeah, he's a, yeah, probably. German descent.

German Spanish descent, you know what? I don't know. I don't know. Yeah, he's probably like a British American You know what I mean His family's from Britain Oh yeah He had like a

Nathan Dreye His ancestors are like fucking They sit Isn't that the whole point of that game Is that his ancestors Fucking I don't remember Fuck man

I played three once I enjoyed it I just I played three Two's great Ten years ago She was really good She's really good

I'm playing through one right now It's actually pretty good I've been meaning to go back I just I'm gonna turn on my PS4 I have this I just have this backlog of shit That I just like

I have to get through Yeah I need to more time. I fucked myself, man. I, I was like, hey, let's do podcast. I'm do solo podcast. I'm a stream on Saturday. And I was like, oh, I don't have time to do anything anymore. Yeah, it's crazy. Night is dark, man. The second you get a schedule, it's like you realize how fleeting time is. Literally. And I, and I probably have over 100 games I need to play. It's not stupid. I definitely own, like, well, like, way more games than I've ever played for sure. Yeah. It's crazy. Even now, I have way more games things to finish. Especially with like, fucking

game pass and shit. That shit is ridiculous. Game pass is so insane. Every time I'm overwhelmed consistently. I get, I get nauseous. I'm like, oh, my God, there's too much shit on here. Let's turn it off. It's funny, I have all these games, and I'm just sitting here waiting for Doom. Yeah, because that's, when you think about it, there's only a handful of games you really want to play. Yeah.

You just kind of casually play other stuff passing by. That's what you accumulate all this shit that you don't really get around to. Yeah. And that's what I've beaten Mass Effect a thousand times. I've put a thousand hours in a Skyrim. Yeah. Doom, like, I've beaten that twice, even though I haven't played Witcher yet. I think I've played.

You know, it's like, why am I doing this to myself? I think I've played the entirety of the Halo trilogy at least 200, 300, 400 times. That's ridiculous. We could have played everything else. Yeah, I could have played so much. I could have played Final Fantasy 7. I could have played Final Fantasy 7 once. But I just, I feel you, man.

It's a wild man. I keep going. Okay, streaming on Saturday. How should I play? And then I somehow like... Sonic. Well, yeah. Sonic 2 again.

I've been played since I was like six years old. and then and then somehow I'm like back on Skyrim No not Skyrim oh I did do Skyrim And then I did Dark Souls again I was like it's the same rotation It's always the same rotation I need to stop this Because video games are like

You know it's just like you find the things That like feel great All the time And it's like oh man Yeah it's a go to Like I always pick the same movies I'm always if I'm in the mood to watch a movie I'll always watch typically the same things

Unless it's like a new thing that I want to catch Or if there's like a show on Netflix That's like Speaking of shows on Netflix Yeah speaking of shows on Netflix I don't what you're going to say. Yeah, yeah. Speaking of that,

anyone who follows me, anyone who knows me knows I praise this show a lot. But Castlevania Season 3 was so fucking amazing. Yeah. That I can't. Please watch it. It's really, please watch it.

It is probably the best modern animated show. I'd been mean to catch you, man. It's so, it's so good. It's definitely my favorite serious animated show. Like, as far as, like, anime, it's not an anime, really. It's damn there, though,

but it's pretty close. But, like, as far as, like, shows like that go. It's like, it's one of my top favorite. It's so fucking so good. It's anime made well. It's like, because there's no, there's no cheeby bullshit in it. Well, there's no cheapy bullshit, but there's also just no filler.

All of it is like, and like, there are like, this season was actually kind of slow. Like, there was like, there was perfect there were slow parts of it and I was like, oh shit, there's like kind of, it's not that nothing was happening. It's that it was like all just like character building. It was one there's like, but the second the season ends, it's like everything

everything pays off in that season. Everything from the price is in coalasses too. It's so good. Yeah. It's so. I just, my biggest problem is I'm in a tiny room now. Yeah.

I just, my computer chairs in the way of my TV. And so I haven't turned on my consoles. And I only have Netflix on, I'm just, I just don't want to pay for it because I have it for free on my Xbox. It's one of my friends accounts. And I was like,

my TV's blocked. So I haven't turned on any of my shit. It's a really, it's a really like, please watch. It's a video game adaptation. So it's like those are traditionally pretty bad We were just like it was one random day

We were just like I was like off from school and work We were just sitting down and I was like It was Castlevania's on it was like we should watch this Then the first episode was fucking wild And we were like let's just keep watching And then we finished the first season In like two hours, only like four episodes Yeah four episodes yeah

And I was like this is insane And I got so amped for the next season I come out which came out I think it came out last year Yeah And then this and then this season came out And it was just like Just better every

It just keeps getting better It's probably going to do that. Like, there, there's so much shit out there. Eventually there's going to be a handful of things that are just, just absolute fucking grand slams.

For real, dude. That's all I felt about, when I watched Marvel's Daredevil. Oh, yeah. I was like, wow, this is, this is, on Netflix,

like, this is amazing. The amount of garbage I was on Netflix, that, Kingpin, I've never, that acting, I was enthralled

like just like in love with that character he's a character I never gave a shit about yeah previously I never gave you one reason to I cared because I read comics that's about it but I was like oh Daredevil was like important I knew

Kingpin from like the video games and I was like this is just a or the cartoon where he's just some you're just a fat asshole he was just a sad piece of shit and like Vanessa would shit all over him yeah and he's just like oh

it's weird man like there's a bunch of shit that just has no right to be all the stuff that should be great is terrible and all the stuff that shouldn't be really good at all is pretty solid. I thought about Clone Wars. Star Wars had no reason to be as good as it was because like, I've heard it's good. Yeah.

I was like, oh, this is going to be a Star Wars anime show. It's not going to be that good. And I remember watching it. I was like, this is amazing because the clones are actually like not just complete clones. They're like their own people. And I was like this is fucking good. Like, because the Clone Wars is mostly about like, it's about Anakin and Osoca and everybody else. but it was mostly about the clones,

like, this thing as, like their own people, but also being clones of the same person who's kind of like a murderous piece of shit. Sounds like Arnold Schwarzenegger movie or something.

Yeah. All these clones and crazy stuff. Dude, it's so good. It sounds terrible. It's apparently really good. It is the best, it is the best anything from Star Wars,

actually. It is insane. I mean, I've heard that. I'm going to say, I'm going to say, oh, that sounds pretty bold,

but I'm like, wait a minute. The Star Wars hasn't had a great track rigour on a lot of off. It's, dude, it's wild. It's like... It's kind of weird having a franchise that just, that loved. And that, yeah, embraced and people just

keep pumping out mediocre shit. It's most, it's astounding how much of this famous series is actually just really bad. The last, the last, the last trilogy was terrible. The last trilogy was terrible. The prequels weren't, weren't good. They're not good. They weren't good, but like, people love them. Like, I'm on, I love.

People are going back and it's nostalgia. That's nostalgia. I think us loving it. Because I remember, like, I have no nostalgia for that, for that, pre those prequels i only like the uh darth vader i mean darth maher fight uh at the end and phantom innis that's good fight it was good it was good i liked it speaking of darth mall doth mall becomes the coolest character in fucking corn wars yeah i saw a scene of him he's a beast i saw a scene of him fighting um obi um and i was i was watching i always watch those things of like who's the who's the

strongest um jetties who's the strongest Sith all this stuff and then i started checking out some character they showed this scene from the comb wars and i checked it out and i was like yeah choreography looks pretty good in this. It looks like it's actually a pretty good show. Super fucking good, man. I just had no idea of Castlevania was going to be that good. I don't think anybody didn't. I was like, I mean, video games have such a bad track record.

It's like, okay, well, this is probably just going to be like a really horrible cash grab. And then you watch it and it's like, this is fucking amazing. Fucking, what's that other one? The Witcher. Witcher had no business to be as going to lose. I thought the Witcher was going to be fucking garbage. And I was like, I had faith, man. I had faith in Henry Cavill.

Yeah, Cavill was a. Cavill's a snack. You know, every, you know, every male I've talked to is in 100% agreement about that? It's weird. He's really attractive.

He's an attractive person. He's the, he's the one guy that, like, say, like, oh, we're not gay, but if Henry Cavill wanted to bang, you'd say yes.

Yep. He didn't say no, so. No. I don't get fuck what you say. You would. I don't like men, but like,

I can like that, man. I appreciate it. Like, if he, if he caressed you, and held you tight to his giant fucking hairy chest, you'd feel safe, you'd feel like you're at home.

You're back in the womb. I feel safe. I feel safe. Henry, you make me feel safe. He's just like that with his nice British voice. It's okay. Everything's going to be all right. He's talking about like when somebody asked him like PlayStation or Xbox, he's like PC.

He's all, with this, he was so disgusted to his PC. But I was like, why would I play anyone else? And that's, I'm like, yeah, that's, that's, um, I understand it now, though. He's a gamist, man. Now I've had a good rig for two years. And that's what I say. It's hard for me to turn back on the consoles because, fuck, man.

I've re-bought like everything. Yeah. It's on the PC now. I have a, like an RTX 2080TI. I have like a beastly rig right now. Yeah. I never, I rarely play games on it. That's weird.

Because I just work on it all the time. Oh. You don't want to be on it. No. I mean. I always just wanted, like, be in my bed, like, sloped back. like on my couch or something. Slouch the back high.

Because I just, oh man, it definitely like, it runs better for sure. But I'm also like crouched over this fucking thing. You need to get better shit. You need a better chair. Yeah.

I just don't want to play on it. I mean, also games are fucking huge. They're fucking huge. Like the files for games now are ridiculous. They're pretty big. Yeah, it's like,

I need another hard drive. And the second I like put like, you know, I unload all my files for video for video stuff onto my computer and it's like, you've run out of space. And it's like, God, I got to delete the fucking division two

because it's like 8,000 gigs. It's just like, if I could have it my way, I would have an editing rig and a gaming rig separately, but that's just insanely expensive. I mean, just get another hard drive. Just get like another 2 terabyte and then just put all your fucking shit on one and then one of the other.

Yeah. Because I have to do that now because I have just the salt state, another terabyte, and then that ran out immediately. Yeah. It's like, what the fuck? It's ridiculous. Yeah.

I don't know. It crashes sometimes, like, out of nowhere. Like, I'll be playing fucking combat evolved. Like, Halo 1. Well, that's just combat evolved. No. Oh, yeah. No, it's not.

Yeah, it is. Because I have games that crash on me, too. Yeah. Like, I was playing Saints fucking row two. And I was crashing. Yeah. And it's just like my whole computer, my whole computer stops and it's like...

Oh, your whole computer. Oh, wait, that's different. Oh, I was just talking about the game. No, straight up, like, the computer just stops. Well, you probably need to do a hard reset. Yeah. My shit doesn't crash like that. Well, congrats.

Lucky you. have a and you have better shit than me yeah but the second you have better shit is like that you have like infinitely more problems because now like nothing reacts the same way to everything and like it's i have i've had the most problems with this pc than i've had with any other PC even when running games even if it's even though it's the strongest pc i've ever had annoying i just the just like the just when you put all the settings up to like ultra high like the very high the highest and just everything just looks so fucking like that's darned it's nice i i i i just that's what happened my friend because he had this awesome pc i live with him uh

in this apartment for a while. And he just started playing Shadow Mordor. I think it was in 2017 or something. He started playing it. And then I had it. And I was looking at it on my Xbox one. And I was looking at it on his screen. And I was like, fuck this shit.

Like his shit looks amazing. Everyone looks like there, you can see every fiber in their muscles. The blood, like their black blood was just so like, I was like, man, this is dumb. Like, I don't want to play on fucking this shit anymore. I haven't gone on a PC yet. And I'm really, I'm really happy. I'm going to get one sooner. Hell yeah, man.

When I finally fix up my room, I'm definitely going to get a PC and a sand. We could stream that. That'd be insane. Everything. Mod everything. Yeah. That's, it's so fun.

Like, it's cool that Bethesda allowed some mods on the, on the console. Yeah, they did. That was cool. That was a really interesting. That was a pretty forward-thinking idea.

Really? That was cool. That was really, really good things they did in that time. They did it with, they did it with Fallout 4 and they did it with which all the Skyrim. Skyrim. Skyrim.

It was dope. And I was like, that's great. But then PC also has better. Yeah, more. Yeah. Yeah, like so like, we get a PC fairly soon. Hell yeah, man.

Definitely. I actually just recently bought a capture card for my switch. Oh, sick. Did you? Yeah. You've been saying that for months. Where is it? I just bought one.

Like, today. Like, actually. You know what I heard you say that? Yeah, I heard you say something about a capture card. Yeah, I purchased one today. It was a little, it's a little pricey, but like, I think it's going to pay it. What was it?

Did you get an Elgado? Yeah. It was one for the PS4. It's PS4, switch. PC. Yeah, they work for it. The capture card is a capture card. It works for everything.

Yeah. with a smash every now and then. Why would you buy an Ethernet cable? Just be a little bit faster. So if I would, so if I were like Smash Online. For the PC? Yeah. For the, for the laptop.

Oh no, for like for the, for the Switch? You can just plug the one that, there's one in the PS4 already. There's a piece of where that is it a converter that goes to the switch too? A converter. Is it the same thing? You just unplug it. I don't. Really?

There's another. What do you mean? Spend necessary money, but dope. What do you got? I don't have any internet cables because I don't think have an Ethernet thing on them, the switch. It doesn't have like an Ethernet thing on them. Oh, it doesn't have a port. You have to, like, convert it?

Yeah. Oh. I don't know. I don't have one. I haven't checked, but I'm pretty sure that's why they exist. Oh, okay. Oh, I didn't know that. That's a fucking stupid design.

Okay. Yeah, it is. The Switch is, Nintendo doesn't know how to design anything. I didn't even know that. That was the thing. Like, people were like, oh, yeah, they had an Ethernet cable. So I'm going to get that. They can only make games and that's it.

They can't make, they can't make hardware at all. Oh, man. We forgot that people might want to have faster and stable internet. I never want to play. Most of their games are not internet-based. That's not only fair thing. That's true. That's true.

It's fair. Except for Sputoon and Smash the most competitive, one of the most competitive games on the planet. Yeah. So it's still stupid. I don't know, man. The Switch is like weird because it's like really cool. But then like I never want to play it. I never want to play it unless I'm like playing Smash with everybody.

And that's it. That's the only time I ever play the Switch. Because if I play stuff on handheld, I always feel weird because like the JoyConn's like have like a slight. You know what I mean? Like there's like a slight give where it feels like you could snap it. I like my switch, but like They need a mega version. Yeah, they need to like have the switch pro come out like real soon.

I just need to. You have one too, right? I know, I had it. The first year it came out. And then I was too, I was too impatient to wait for other shit to come out. So I sold it. I need you three to have it right now.

Yeah, big factually. I need somebody to fucking mail me theirs. Because I just like, I just can't bring myself to buy another one. Even though I want to, but I'm like, I have a lot of games on it and I just, I never I got Breath of the Wild

and I fell in love with that console and I was like this console is literally my life I get it, I get it I just I really put the energy out there so someone mill me yours no it's just breath of the wild smash I put like a lot of the final fan

because they have like the stories the store is starting to build up starting to get a bit of a presence but like yeah it just needs a virtual console I was Odyssey Odyssey is dope it's very reminiscent

in America 64 for her okay Success starts with your drive, and American Public University is here to fuel it. With affordable tuition and over 200 flexible online programs, APU helps you gain the skills and confidence to move forward. Whether you're changing careers, starting fresh, or pursuing a lifelong passion,

our programs are designed for people who never stop. You bring the fire, APU will fuel the journey. Learn more at APU.APUS.edu. you. I've got Dan Morgan here on the pod. Say hi, Dan. Hey, how's it going today? It's going good, man. Tell us who you are and what you do. I'm Dan Morgan. I'm an attorney and a managing partner at Morgan and Morgan, which is America's largest injury law firm. That's pretty awesome. Um, I think I saw billboard of years recently that said 20 billion one. 20 million is an insane number. Yeah, 20 billion recovered. It's actually, I think, somewhere north, probably closer to 22, 23 after this year. And each year we get

bigger and badder and our army grows. So the number will hopefully keep getting bigger and bigger as time goes on. Awesome. So how does someone get in contact with Morgan and Morgan? What would I do if I got into an accident? Probably the easiest way is dialing pound law. That's pound 529 from your cell phone. We are always open. Our call center is always waiting to take your call. 24-7-365. Wow. Dan Morgan. From Morgan and Morgan, America's Large Injury Lawfirm, thanks for coming by the show. Thanks for having me. Visit furtherpeople.com for an office near you. Yeah. Honestly is pretty fun. Nintendo, listen to me.

You have so many good games and virtual console. Just hook me up. Just do it. Look, it's so much money. They're not listening. So much money. They're not listening.

But someone might listen. Here's the thing. There's probably somebody from Microsoft listening. There's probably somebody from Sony listening. Definitely nobody from Nintendo. Definitely not. They don't do that. Because they don't know how to listen to podcasts.

Come on. I bet they don't even know. I bet they straight up don't even know what YouTube is still. Well, you know, if you're out there, please, listen to me. Just put Metroid Fusion on a switch, man. Your pleads are falling on deaf ears. I know, but they have been for years. You might as well just keep pleading.

Oh, my God. Well, we're at two hours now. Yip, yep. So you know what that means? We're going to read through these fucking horrendous, horrendous $10 patrons. By the way, if you want to support this trash fest, you can go to patreon.com slash the snark tank,

$1 a month. gets you early access to every episode. $5 gets you your questions and comments read on the show. And 10. Sweeney. Don't say that. Don't say that. I'm taking.

Sorry. I'm taking you this. I'm kidding. I'm kidding. It's not me. It's not me. Derek's not me. I know what you're talking about.

Double O Dolphin. Whoa. A deplorable. A level one cleric. Nice. Aaron de la Ca. De la Cah. Oh my God.

De La Cac. Aaron de la Caudra. Oh, I thought it was going to be like a fake bullshit. It's just a real last name. Sorry about that. Your name is nice. Adrian Royal, Ethereum, Alex Jones, all hands on dick,

aloof, the him, the aloof, the Hyman Ripper Ransom. Come on, man. Good. Wow, I like that. Good, nice. God, help us. Artie, the one-man party.

Badly Brave. Beals above the Gimp. Hey, Beals. Hey, Beals. Balana, Black Nipple Gang, BLT, the Ace Hoonter, Brandon Peavy, Carl Weezer's juicy cum dumpster ass.

Carlton Banks. Gee, Jimmy. My ass is so full of him. Carson, my God. Carrie Roth, Carson Jones, cataclysmic cunt. That's pretty good. Catnips.

Chad. Christopher Middling. That name always fucks me. Sorry, Chris. It trips me up because it just looks so similar to my name. Corey McNulty, David Davis. Hey, David. David.

Vanilla man over here. Leave him alone. He's messaged us. Leave alone. Decato. Dixie Normis. Dixie Normis. That's a fucking, that's a Bart Simpson. Yeah. That's a Bart Simpson phone call. I'm looking for Dixie Normis. I'm looking for Dixie Normis. What is this? Dode Dod? Doad? Is that like Galga Dots like fucking son or something? Dottie Doddy Doddie Dodd. Doody Dodd.

What the fuck your name is? Swedish fucking Yodels. Donald Trump, the world. renowned Negro Hunter. Oh. Someone put that into action. You know, thank you so much. I'm glad that became a thing. Dummy thick Dave.

Damn, Dave. Dylan Broadbent. Edward Thiboudou. God damn it. That's like a British thing. Eric Piper. Fake Flynn. Fat Houdini.

I think I recognize that name for some reason. Fat Houdini. Fat Houdini sounds familiar. Female Sonic Admire. Oh, God. I'm going to need to look that. one up in a thesaurus, this one. Oh, man. Let's hear it. Fialar Tandri Guthrmson?

Damn. Thank you. It's a hard name. I'm sorry. I'm already dyslexic as it is. So anytime there's like a lot of consonants in a row, are you a regular reader or are you dyslexic also? No, I'm all right. You're not dyslexic. No. I'm massive dyslexic, which is why it's a good thing I'm in charge of reading this. All right. Fjord Noir. Fouet. Fouet. Fuck you.

Stevie Wonder, we all know your eyes were. That's such a bold statement. Gassie Gassie Gisgid, Gennie Higard, Glendon Cole Simper. Genet. You're real thick down here, Jene. Let me touch your bulbous penis, Jena. Gloffnoy, a jester of the Sween king.

Glocknoy, josted a Sween king? Gucci gang, my Gouche is gangrene. That's a fucking good one, dude. That's pretty good. Heartless wretch. Harvey Boswold. I have a soft spot for that one still. That one's a solid one.

Jacob Armstrong, Jake Parsons, Jefferson Steel Flex. Wait, who was that from? I don't know. From something. That's definitely from something. DeFlex is definitely from something.

Dodgewood? No. It's definitely not a real name. No, it's, fuck. It's from a show. I don't know what show, though. Jeremiah D. McRoberts. Jose Horwich.

Horach is what he said. That's how you pronounce it. Horach. So Jose Horach. Thank you for your pledge. Thank you for watching. Joshua Miller, King of haphazard, Nicka. Yeah.

Good job. Good job, Chris. You said back really well, man. Yeah, I have to. He practiced. I really got it. I'm not going to let this happen to him. I said it over and over again while I was sleeping last night.

And sometimes when I'm angry when I play video games. Sometimes I'm really angry. I play video games. I say Nick. Leon and Susan five ever. Luke Abela. Luke Jerkovic. Melfis 1.

Yeah, I got that right. Mia Khalifa, once again. Mia Kleeva. Thanks. Mike Gates, Mr. Habrowski, Mystic D.N. Nicola Temple. Oliver Troxel. Such a weird name. That is a strange one.

Papa John. Paul's favorite butt slut. Oh, that's hot. Okay. That's real hot. Plant bat. Polio pussy got me disabled. That shit was so fucking.

vibrant last one. Thank you for that. P.P. Extendis, Richter 86. Rod holder. Rushanish. Rusticity. Rusty cunts. Shadenforian slips. Sentient condom. It knows. That's an insult. I said that to somebody. He said they're taking your, they're taking your,

you're taking your shit, man. Kahn of bullying the sentience. You were talking about fucking, um, Pro Jared. Pro Jared. Almost said progerian. I said he was a condom that looks like it was bullied into sentience. Sex haver.

Nice. That's a fucking Xbox 360, like, 2009 game. Yeah, you wouldn't know, because I was having this threesome with these girls. I wanted them play. If I was playing, I would have totally fucking crush your ass, dude. Lowercase X, sex haver. Lowercase X. The first Marvel Welfare you ever played with, I played with Jesus Christ.

It was like the original. Yeah, nice. How do you get that? You got to be, day one, man. Day one. Sherlock 93. Shitsu posting. Side Show Bob's Body Double.

Slumped Mole Studios. Augy Ardvark, some Sweeney Reagan, Sunny Chance, Sweeney's Magic Weenie, Sweeney Tom, the ethnic barber of Yeat Street. Good Lord, this is another, like, Eastern European thing. Stitsy, Rish Pekema? Varka. I'm sorry, man. I'm so sorry. Thank you.

I'm really sorry. We appreciate you. I'm just retarded. We're Americans. Tharja IBW, the cosmic hippie, the dreamer in his shadow, the progerian hunter. It's pretty much a goblin hunter It's pretty much damn near a goblin hunter The sinister Mr. Fister

That's sick That's pretty good I like how that rolls off the tongue The virginity thief The Invisible Skeptychic The Specter Angel Toby Shootman Triple Question Mark

Umberman And wash your anus White Tom Sweeney And yeah We apparently butchered this last time Or I butched this last time Yaslin Clemens

Oh I assume that's what it is Respectable Oh it's not an L She related to Yasser Clemens Yassine Clemens Okay

Thank you so much I saw an L there For some reason last time I apologize You're saying You're looking New York Yankee pitcher Roger Clemens

Was he a Yankee? Yeah I don't know anything about the Yankees I don't know anything about the Yankees I've been to Yankees I've been to New York people

Derek Jeter That's it And what about A-Rod A-Rod? Arod. Of course. He's the Rican. He's the Rican.

Is he Dominican? You know Arod. Who the fuck is A-Rod? Alex Rodriguez. He was fucking... The kid from high school? If you knew Derek Jeter, you should know who A-Rod is. God, what did...

You're not... Okay. I mean, I don't even like baseball, and I know you're... I know who A-Rod is. But I also... But I also knew who... I also knew, like, three A-Rodds. Like, with that name.

Oh, I... I know Alex Rodriguez in my hometown... Alex Rodriguez is a super fucking hilariously common name. insane before before we get too off track guys um we've noticed how we've noticed how insane the growth on our patreon has become and we really really really appreciate yeah it means a lot it's wild to think that this podcast has actually enjoyed by people who aren't all mentally disabled um some of you guys might be you know what that's okay we welcome we welcome your mentally disabled business yeah also also update before we really sign off on this uh i'm receiving a lot of requests

For merch. We've got a lot of art sent in. I got this one piece that was like fucking astounding. I think I want to turn into something. It's beautiful. So if you are sending messages to the email, Raygun Business at Gmail, with some merch ideas, I promise you, I'm sifting through a lot of them. I'm reading all of them. Not all of them are going to be responded to because I just have a lot of shit to do.

And also just like, I got to make sure that we get the best shit ever. So apologies if maybe you haven't gotten a response It's likely because I'm busy using other thing Sure If I'm being real But I'm gonna try and get some of that merch out Probably at least the design out by the end of the month And we can hopefully ship them out

After then we've got to start a new store I might shop around for some Some partners who are willing to help us do that So merch is incoming Yep, yep Hell yeah The snart tank is going to be wearable very soon Dude, some of the art that we've gotten is insane.

I just want socks. I saw one picture. Sarks, the socks would be cool. I saw one picture of our snark tank that was so genuinely amazing. Yeah. That like, it's just,

it's wild that like, the fact that I'm already on merchandise makes me fucking, you know, cringe a little bit. But, uh, the three sweet moon, that shit fucks with me because I've seen people with it on.

And it's just like, oh man, the God, God's dead. You, you yesterday apparently, like her the day before got recognized for the podcast. Dude,

I was so, for the podcast. So it's weird. It's weird. It's weird. So I was at Barnes & Noble a few days ago. So I'm going to ask me if I wanted a Twinkie. And I was like, why would I want a Twinkie? Oh shit, because I talked about fucking a hot Twinkie.

And that wasn't that long ago. That was like within the week. That was the last episode. That was the last episode. That's insane, dude. That's insane. So the growth is there and it's really appreciated. You guys are amazing.

Yeah. And video should be coming relatively soon, definitely before the end of the month. I'm shopping around for some cameras right now. I think I found the ones that we need. I'm going to see if I can dress up this set a little bit more. It's a little bit bare. I think we could work with it, though, for the time being. We can make it more adorable.

Yeah, we could do some stuff. You can put some dogs out there. So that's all the housekeeping done. I guess we'll see you guys next week. Same time, same place. Uh, bye-bye. Farewells. Have a little faith, Arthur.

Have a little for sure. Yeah. Yeah. Have a little for sure. Have a little sure. Oh. Oh. Oh.

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