The Snark Tank - #151: Tucker Carlson Is The Newest Host of The Snark Tank

Episode Date: May 1, 2023

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Dad, tomorrow can we start a band? Can we become robots? Affirmative. Can we go crab battling? That isn't a thing. How about swimming? Dad, can we take a nap? You not off and I'll pick up the shop and deal.

Deal. While you do the important things, we'll do the essentials. Book your free click-and-collect slot at tesco.e or in-app. Tesco, every little helps. Terms and conditions apply. Good evening, America. I would like to inform you all of the Snark Tank podcast. It has three of the realest niggas I have ever known.

Chris Ray Cum Maldonado, Thomas IHG, Sweeney, and some black sex drive. Discussions include debilitating libtard humor and jokes made at the expense of women and minorities. They can be pretty based sometimes on God on God. My personal favorite is when Chris takes his shirt off to reveal that sexy Puerto Rican chest. The lack of hairs make me know he's itching to become a beaner bitch is to be. toilet seat. That big motherfucker Sweeney really do got the most brain dead takes I have ever seen, but man, what

I would do get a chunk of his lard ass. Boy, if you don't stretch those cheeks like nicicato, avocado, and I haven't forgotten about Mr. Olympic level thunder thighs. I want black man to crush my impotent manhood between his phalanjies and make me squirm. Listen to the

Snart Tank podcast. Every whenever the fuck they upload, I don't know. Long live the king of haphazard. Hey, Richard. Hey, Gid. You ever that, so forgive me if I'm wrong. I haven't seen Rocky or Rocky 2 or Rocky 3 or Rocky 4 or Rocky 5 or Creed 2 or Creed 3. Jeez, okay.

So Rocky is a boxer, correct? Yes. More or less. Okay. He's a boxer. He's a boxer. I would say that. More or less.

I'd give him that. I just, yeah, I wanted to make sure I didn't want to make a fool, you know. No, Rocky is a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a moose and his best friends are bowingle, a fucking gopher. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Do you remember that? Do you remember that? Yeah, it was horrible. Yeah, it was horrible. All the, all the, all the rockies are live action.

What are you talking about? No, Rocky and Bowwinkle. Rocky and Bullwink. Oh, man, what a stupid. I don't remember they're big. That's way, wait. You don't remember the live action? It was so old.

It's very real. It's very real. Why would they modernize that? It got modernized in 2001 or some shit. It was in 2000 and it was, uh, it was, uh, I'm not even joking. It was terrible. I don't even,

did they ever make a modernized cartoon? Or did they jump from like the fucking 60s cartoon to the, to the live action? They were going to. That was happened? It was the 60s cartoon to the live action. That's what they did. because there wasn't like a 90s

like edgy reboot of Rocky and Bullwinkle. You know, that had no chance. They should have been. He's like, fucking, I don't know. Horrible. I don't even remember what they do. Like Rocky, they're like super heroes or something? They're like pilots or some shit. They're like, they're like, I think

they're like fucking the park ranger up or something. No, that's, that's, no, that's, that's, no, that's, that's, that's, no, that's, Yogi bear would be, yeah, like, terrorizing the yellow Googie Bear will be eating children. Jellystone Park and he'd be just, yeah, tearing them niggas up. I remember, I remember now. Ripping children.

Are they the same universe? I think, I feel like they're in the same universe. They're all Hannah Barberts, I feel like. Guys, yo, listen to this plot synopsis of Rocky and Bullwinkle, the film from 2000. Rocky the Squirrel and Bullwinkle J. Moose live a melancholic life ever since their television series was canceled in 1964. This movie came out in 2000. I wanted to see it so bad. I wanted to see it so bad.

Yes, because it was like being advertised to Cartoon Network, and I was like, oh my God, I'm a child television that works on me. Grandma, let's go see it. And she was like, Kingston. I remember that show. It wasn't that of good. I was like, come on, grandma. Your grandmother, your grandmother remembers that show from her childhood,

and she doesn't give a shit. Look, I swear to you, I'm not even, I might not even be exaggerating here. I don't think I've thought about Rocky and Bullwinkle for like 23 years, I think. Yeah, decade. That's fair. It has easily been at least two decades since I've even remote, since I've even seen, like, there's no, like, there's no memes about it. There's no, like, you know how the old Spider-Man has, like, the old Spider-Man has all those, like, old 60s memes.

Of course. No cultural relevance at all for Rocky and Bo Winkle. The creator of Rucking Bull Winkle died, not having contributed really much of anything to our culture. It was probably beaten to death for how stupid the cartoon was. He probably got trampled to death by a horny moose. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He was probably beaten a death for how stupid the show was. That is so fucking outrageous.

That is so ridiculous. He was probably, that's not unreasonable at all. They probably beat and killed him. That's what you just said, Derek. Like, you know those soft-ass executives that never do anything themselves? Nah, this time, they brought him into a board meeting, and they just wailed on him until he was gone.

Until there was no remains. Until they were punching him. Someone grabbed the back of his head and was punching him in the face until his face was hitting his own palm. It was just a punching fucking nothing. They didn't stop kicking and punching him until he was dust. And then they left. And then that was the last we'd ever heard of him. That was the last we'd ever heard of him.

No one said a word. No one said a word. People and not even because people were told to be discreet about it. They just genuinely forgot that they had done it. Because that's how little. That's how little it mattered to them. later on they're like what you're in jail you're like for what for what oh you killed somebody i did he's like you're in arrest for the murder for the murder of the creator of rocky bo wiggle

and then he's in the you're in the car and you're like oh oh oh i did that one time oh yeah we beat him we beat him savagely your honor your honor Does it really count for anything? Your Honor, with all due respect, I completely forgot about this. And so did everybody else. Is it really that big of a deal that this happened? And the judge is like, you're right. I don't know why this guy is receiving so much flame right now.

So this poor fucking, he might still be up. not. I don't remember. I'm trying to remember the themes. I'm trying to remember anything. You don't remember it? It was like, Derek, you're going to hurt yourself. It was, uh, you're going to hurt yourself. Trying to remember the Rocky and Bull. I have memory of all that shit. Do you actually remember something? Do you remember it? Do you remember it? Do you remember it?

No, I don't remember. Like, that's how insignificant is. I don't remember it. You get, Derek, Chris, name shows, and I bet you more often than not I remember the theme song. but I don't remember shit from this I remember the thing song for things I don't give a fuck about like right I didn't really watch them

I just heard it in passing when I was little anything like the Rocky I can't think of it I'm trying to think of something that's the Rocky

Rocky you know what I do remember I do remember that Bullwinkle sounded like a complete fucking moron I do remember that voice he was like

oh my booie I think that's why like No, Rocky. Okay, okay, guys. No, that's what he sounded like. We get it. We get it.

We get it. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Rocky, Rocky, but I have to hear this because I have no recollection. What if there's no theme song? What if there is no theme song?

You don't have anything. It triggers no memory whatsoever. Like, nothing. Let's see. Nothing. I think, of all the Hannah Barbarous shit, and I remember

like almost all the theme songs for all of that shit. Yeah, I... As a matter of fact, for some reason, I was just thinking a Flintstones theme song that long ago. I wasn't watching the Flintstones. Meet the Flint. Yeah, I remember. See, everybody... That's easy. Yeah, that's a culturally... That's a culturally

impactful show. It's like, I appreciate that it's like it really captures old school, too, because they're like, we'll have a gay old time. And it just, I love, like, before that meant... Before that meant... sucking dick. The thing about Rocky and Bullwinkle, I'm really suspicious of Rocky and Bullwinkle because

so Rocky and Bullwinkle, right, canceled in 1964. That's when it was canceled. And then the movie comes out in 2000. You know what that tells me? That tells me that they waited for this man, the creator of Rocky and Bullwinkle, to absolutely die before they were like, okay, he's dead. He definitely didn't want anybody doing anything with his fucking show. And then he died and then they were like, he's dead.

Let's make a movie while it's still got like some gas in the tank. You know how like when SpongeBob? Some gas. Yeah, yeah. It's got, it had some gas a little bit. Not a lot, but a little bit. But like imagine he survived. Imagine he survived until like 2020.

You know what I mean? They wouldn't have made it here now. Guys, did you watch the opening of it a little bit? There's a very JFK's assassination or, I mean, moment where like they're in the back of a car like people waving to them and like it kind of reminiscent of JFK's murder or the assassination sorry they they killed yep yeah that was that was the whole that's why I got canceled because they thought that uh they inspired the the shooter that's a lie but that's that's a good lie that's a good lie that's not a good one he died he died

so it starts off years later are you guys watching the theme song it starts with this fucking bald-ass dork with glasses and a fucking like some shitty drawn thing and it's really not good. We are spending too much time on Rocky and Boehicle I have to say. Let's

let's let's let's Rucky and Boeco fucking your ass. It just sounds like some old timing of that mid-Atlantic shit or whatever. And Rocky and Bo-Winkle I hear. Transit, uh, it's a transatlantic. Trans-Atlantic.

Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Yeah, it's like that bullshit. Yeah. As opposed to a cis-atlantic, which is presumably something else. You got to calm down. You got to calm down. You've got to calm down. You're open a can of worms that we don't need to deal with right now, right?

Those people, that group, that group's got enough on their plate right now, right? Let's not add anything more to their plate. They're going through a lot right now. Let them be. I'm not trying. Look, I'm a big supporter of the trans community. I'm just saying. I am too, but I'm very aware that they're having a very tough go at it.

right now, you know. They're playing the game on hard mode right now. They're going to be playing that game on hard mode for a while, let me tell you. Ultra nightmare, bro. There, geez. That's an ultra nightmare. Black people, so, so white people have it on, white people have it on normal, right? Hispanics, depending on what side you sit on, it varies.

You could be a me and they can be on pretty hard. It could be a Christian, it can be on a moderately difficult. What do you mean? No, no, no, you don't, you don't count at all. You don't count at all. Absolutely. You got no, you're not on any difficulty setting. Are you kidding me?

You, you, what do you mean? Tell you something. Let me tell you something. Let me tell you something, Kingston. I'm a really lucky. What are you about to do in a few months? No, hold on. What are you about to do?

What are you about to do? What do you mean? I don't know. I don't know. What are you about to move into your, are you about to move into your, are you about to move into your own home that you don't really have to pay anything for at all? What do you mean, bro? I got lucky.

I got lucky. Exactly. My situation. Luck is a difficulty modifier. Hey, man. It could have been, it could be, it could be way worse for me, man. I got lucky. I stumbled into a decent life.

Right. So you are on, you are on normal, Kingston. You're on normal difficulty. I would say slightly difficult. Slightly difficult. You're like maybe. I mean, if you're a gift in a place, you're on normal. You're on co-op.

Which is easy, by the way. You're a normal Loweh mode. Anyway, anyway, by the way, I'm not lucky. It's nice. By the way, by the way, since the last week's been a little, hey, a little bit of a mess, Sweeney wasn't here last time.

Sweeney was at Coachella. How did that go? Does anybody die? Or is that burning, man, where people run into the fire and... Yeah, they kill themselves. I think you're thinking of the wicker man, Chris. So, uh... No, no, no, no, no.

I swear to God, there was a time Am I making that up, Eric? No, no, somebody definitely sacrificed himself. Somebody ran into an open flame at Burning Man once because they thought, I guess they took the name like super literally. Travis Scott or whatever didn't perform at Coachella, so everybody was fine, right? Like everything?

Yeah, well, it was, you know, it was cool. I saw the guerrillas. It was pretty insane. Um, uh, yeah. What was it like, Bad Bunny was crazy? Actually gorillas with instruments? No, no, the group.

Not a fruit. Not beast. Hey, not African primates. Hear me out. Wouldn't that be way better than actually see the guerrillas? No, would not.

No. I would absolutely. I would pay top dollar to go to a concert. No, you would not. Are you fucking joking? Chris, I think these things. You want to see gorillas.

Hold on. You always think I think. Listen. Yeah, I think you think it. No, no, hold on. Hold on. Hold on. I'm not saying I'd be a fool and I'd be up front.

I'd be in a box real high up. But I would absolutely pay top dollar to see a bunch of like silverbacked gorillas on stage with various instruments being accosted by a crowd of thousands and becoming more and more. hostile and irritable with every passing moment. I'd imagine they start off. They start off happy. They start off actually playing instruments. And yet like, oh shit. And the people yelling at them, they slowly get more upset to the point they eventually

jump in the crowd and start tossing people away. That'd be amazing. I think, you know, it's wild? I bet, I bet you could fill an entire Coachella's worth of people. who were crazy enough to do that. Yeah. I bet that there are that many people crazy enough to like sign up to like, oh,

let's go see wild animals perform with no barriers. Yeah, definitely. People are stupid. People are dumb. People argue, people argue the animals should have the right to vote. And it's like, come on,

bitch. Swallow cyanide. Eat cyanide pills. I've never heard that. I've never heard that in my life. I'm sure it's the same people that fuck the animals too. I'm sure. Oh, yeah, yeah.

Just fucking dumb dums, man. dumb dumb bubblegums man my bearded dragons anus is warm and therefore he should vote why do people do you see that squirrel that image of the squirrel with the condoms

yes that image that's that that image ruined my no no no no no no no it had two condoms in it Chris that's even worse I didn't notice that

I didn't look at it wrong. I looked at it for long enough to make out what it was generally and I was like, okay. I looked at it and I laughed all night and I had the best night I ever had in my life. I bet you did.

You would. You would. You're a fucking... The thing that you tweeted is like, eat my ass or I eat ass, that fucking thing. Oh yeah. Yeah. That I stole it. And I mean, I want to tweet that so bad, but I can't dude. Yeah, you'll be fine. You'll be

You can, you absolutely can. I can't, I can't do what I've edited to. So, listen, before we get two off the rails, as if that hasn't already happened. Yeah. There's very little to talk about this week.

Nothing actually happened really. Which means, I'm sure, tomorrow someone will die. But for now, all that I can think of that I've seen is Tucker Carlson and Don Lemon, both at the same time,

What's going on? I got fired for my job. Curious. What does happen? The left is trying to have sex with your dog. Are you what that happened? The left is trying to have sex with your dog, which is a problem because so am I.

We can't let that happen, can we? So it is kind of wild that both of them lost their positions at the same time. That's like a really weird. They had the, what they really should have done was each of them hired the other one. That would be hilarious. That would be, So, like, Don Lemon on Fox News and then Tucker Carlson on, like, MSNBC or CNN, wherever the fuck Don Lemon was.

That would be hysterical. But that's not what's going to happen, obviously. Don Lemon's gone, whatever. Who cares? Tucker Carlson's probably going to be way better off now, actually. He's probably going to have, like, a ton of people jumping onto him and, like, kind of, you know, supporting him. Yeah. All of his people, all of his people are finally, they probably feel good because they had that cognitive dissidents of,

they know the mainstream media is dog shit, yet they still watch it. They were always watching Tucker on Fox, and their brains were being scrambled because they're like, fucking mainstream media. They always say that, the MSM, and then they fucking watch it every day.

So now, I saw a motherfucker on a quad with a sign that had to be at least 10 feet tall that said fuck Fox News while he's riding it on the sidewalk. Like, these motherfuckers, I mean, God bless him, man. Really late to the game. Really late to the game.

I've been saying fuck Fox News since 2008. I mean, like, as long as you finally get there for whatever reason, good, good on. Yeah, as long as you swap to help, you know. Yeah. You know, soon to play the story. It is kind of. The funny thing is if he got his job back like, like tomorrow, they'd be like, oh, yeah, actually Fox pretty good now. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I got, I kind of, I know. Yeah. That ain't too bad It is so true That is always something that did bother me Where it's like They would like They would be like

Everyone's in cahoots And you know The fucking mainstream media is evil But like they're You know what You think you're not watching Mainstream media When you watch Foxx?

I don't understand Like what do you think you're watching? You think like Fox News is like alternative Like Yeah It's very bizarre But I mean You know

That's occurring It's fun That's a big deal He's definitely going to start his own show somewhere. Yeah, he's got to start his own network and get like the, what is that, Crowder does like the, some type of service where it's like a butt plug or, I forgot what it, he sells something.

Oh, I don't know, Alpha Brain? I don't know. I know that we're doing that for a while. It's like, fuck. It doesn't matter. It'll come to me later, but you buy something, he has a subscription or so he sends you some shit. And I imagine Tucker will do the same thing, but it'll probably be like a clan hoodie or something.

It'll probably be something. I mean, like the Negroes are arriving against us. You could stop them. Like a sick hoodie, like it's like well, like fleeced and shit. But you know, the hood is just little pointy. You would look at it and be like, that's a nice hoodie. Like I, like you would debate getting it. Like for sure.

Like the material's super nice. It's got like really nice stitching. It like form fits to like, your shoulders really like flatteringly. It's like, this is a nice for me. Oh my God. Stop, dude. Like,

it, yeah. It, it, it, it, like, embodies,

like, assassins creed in some way, but, like, not in a lame way. You know what I mean? Where it's like, that's,

that's a badass fucking hoodie. And you put the hood on. And it's, it's only slightly pointy. Like, not so much as to be obvious, but enough to, it's,

it's the kind of pointy from the guy from some, from scary movie. Was it three? When he put it on, he's doing like the whole, the whole three eight miles

like it was slightly pointing it was a gray hoodie it was a gray hoodie but it was like pointed like like that

usually actually something else happened something else that was happening guys so apparently

pictures of Casey Anthony showed up oh you're like a Brazilian she had

so let me clarify this okay go ahead go ahead it was images

of Casey Anthony at some sort of child store A child A store A store involving children And she had a rather A Pizza gate store?

No No She wouldn't be there She'd kill them all She's anti-Pisa Gate if anything But What was it? She had a rather

Voluptuous Backside In the images of her They showed She had a rather Big ass And I was just I didn't I don't know I hate her stuff

She's terrible But the images showed with the image just showed you know I saw it yeah some people Somebody was creeping on her Took pictures of her And people were like hearing me out And I was like yo this is one of those times Man we got to chill

It's one of those times People gotta be like Chill You know what happened in Florida All happened in Florida What Of course it did That whole case

that's a Florida case Oh, is it? I mean, that makes sense Of course it is In Florida, that makes perfect sense Of course it's Florida I mean, I feel Yeah, that's pretty part

For the course Yeah What's crazy about Casey Anthony It's like I see her And I'm like, I don't recognize If this person, if Casey Anthony Were to walk by me on the street I would have no clue

She has a bland Like she has a really She is a bland looking person She looks a little bit like Dexter's sister to me in the show Dexter I've never even did he finished yeah she kind of like wait by side they they look like talking about dexter's lab no not this I was like what I was I was a cartoon I said the show that not Dexter's laboratory

I know I know now what you mean but you said that yeah because he said D D and I was like and then he said yes yes I was like excuse me I was so paralyzed I went in too dry. I went in too dry. It was so stupid what he said that I'm just like, yeah. Derek, that is, Derek, that is where my confusion came from as well. I was also like, what do you mean? She looks like.

Yeah, no. No, no. Yeah, the show, the live action, live action, Dexterous Laboratory. Yeah. is that if you if you actually watch the show the HBO Dexter showtime whatever it was um if you if you really pay attention it is Dexter's laboratory it's the same show I now I say that because there's probably one asshole on YouTube that has made a video essay about that oh yeah and it's probably compelling yeah yeah the 10 hour like the truth behind uh the secret philosophy behind Dexter

laboratory and it's just 10 hours of some guy autistically taking notes on every second of every episode of the show. I understand that long form content is the thing that is the thing that people like now. I get that. However, there are sometimes where I'll see

a video that is seven hours long and I will sincerely sit there and curse the sky. I will curse this guy. Why is this, why is this happening? I mean, you know why it's happening. People put it on and then they leave it on in the background and then people throw a bunch of ads into it. It's an easy way to make money because no one's really paying attention.

That's what's happening. Yeah. That's why, that's why long form con, it's not because anybody's sitting there watching the whole goddamn thing. That's insane. There are, there are videos that are longer than the entire runtime of the series that they are about. And I'm like, that's insane. I'm it's it's too much

it's too much but uh yeah it's yeah I I it's there's a small part of me that wants to capitalize on it but I can't I don't have the I can't

I don't I don't I know the only thing that I've seen is like say for example the Comtown podcast for example they say I don't give a shit use all of our content and repurpose it as much as you want uploaded as much as you want so there are people who just have 24-hour live streams. They're just always streaming

and re-hashing it and then just making money. And I'm like, that's kind of genius, actually. It's actually not about it. You gotta not respect the people you're giving it to, though. You know, the video is not respect where he's like, ah, just here, just look at it. Here, take this.

So, Kingston. It's like, well. Kingston. I'm not built like that. Kingston. What the TV's want? Hey, Kingston. What's up?

Are you, uh, You can do Creator Clash? Stop. Stop. You said you wanted to do it. I do want to do it. I do want to do it. I do want to do it.

I did catch the bug. I'll contact Anise and Ian talking about it. Get my little checkups done. And then Josh Barnett was like, yo, dude. I could make you a killer. Yeah. I can make you a killer. That was so off.

That was. The fact that he told me that. I don't think we've talked about that. We have not, have we talked about this publicly. I don't think we have. I don't think we did. I mentioned it on stream. Oh, okay.

Yeah, we tweeted. I mentioned it on stream a little bit. But Josh Barnett, there's a lot of people undoubtedly who listen to this podcast who have no fucking clue who this person is. Right. Just purely based on demographic. I can't imagine that most of you know who this person is. But he's like a UFC, like, an MMA, like a real, like, proper like, MMA guy. Ex-champion.

Like, big deal. This dude approaches us. Me, Derek, Sweeney, and a bunch of our friends at a table on purpose to converse with us and, like, makes really deep cut references to like my old content. Talks about how he like watches the show and like knows like how out of pocket Sweeney is and all this shit. And I'm like, I, how is this happening right now? That would be like if... And it's funny, too, because it's like, it's completely outside of my world. You know what I mean?

Like, I have no... I didn't know who this... I didn't know anything about this person before he sat down. And then it had to be explained to me how insane this interaction was. Because that would be like if... That would be like if fucking... I don't even know. If, I don't know, Derek Jeter sat down or something like equivalent, where I'm like, why the fuck...

Why? Except I know who Derek Jeter sat down. is because I'm Hispanic and from New York. So, like, there's no chance. No chance that I didn't know who that person is. But I don't know. That was a while. If you're going to, if Josh Barnett trains you, that would be hysterical.

That would be a hysterical. It was funny. The day before was when I first spotted him for, on Friday, whatever the mixer or whatever it was. You mentioned that to me where you saw somebody. Yeah, he was sitting right next to, or he was standing right. It was right before the press conference, the way ins. It was right before the way ins. ceremonial wanes.

And I was like, holy shit, that's Josh Barnett. And I saw he was right next to Johnny Morrison. I completely forgot that Johnny Morrison or Hannigan, or whatever he goes by. It was fighting. Johnny Mercury? Morrison. Mercury is one of his stage names. That sounds like somebody.

Mercury's one of his state names. Morrison. I don't remember when the fuck he was Mercury. I just know he was Morrison in WWWW. WWE a long time ago. Johnny Mundo. Johnny Nitro. whatever you can think of.

But I was like, okay, whatever. So I was just saying to Josh, I was like, hey, man, big fan, all that stuff, blah, blah, blah. And we're just chopping up a little bit. And then he just straight up just like, first he was like complimenting my thighs. And then we were talking about like him and John Morrison. And he was saying, oh, I'm jealous. Even though he's roided out of his mind, he says, this is what these fucking people with the body dysmorphia, they're so jacked on top and they're mad that their legs aren't as big as their fucking torso.

So he was just saying about that I'm like, bro, he is a walking steroid and he's like, oh, I wish my legs were bigger. I'm like, shut the fuck up. Anyway, then Josh is like, oh, yeah, oh, you're Derek, right? Blah, blah, blah. Some black guy and I'm just like, that's when I was like, this is the weirdest thing

that this guy just knows. And they starts asking me about my music. Oh, yeah, like, so how's your music going and all this shit? I'm like, how the fuck is this guy? This guy is a lot older than us. He's like, his life is fighting. He's a proper.

He's a proper adult man, like a proper one. That is a grown-ass man. Yeah, yeah. I know we are all grown-ass men as well, but there's like, there's like a different, it's different. We are adults now. We can't, we can't abide by any other word adults, but there are grown men as well. Yeah, we are not, let me put it, let me put it this way. We are adults.

We are not grown men. Exactly. We are. We are not. We are not grown men at all. But, yeah, no, that was very good point. That was such a jarring. Like, I just, I couldn't believe what was happening.

Yeah, yeah. But that would be an insane, like, if that's, if that's real, if you do decide to do it. And that is the decision that you make, that'd be pretty cool. You should. I, I found out something interesting, man. So I thought that I needed to get surgery on my wrist. apparently my ligament it wasn't fully ruptured

so it healed on its own apparently and that blew my fucking mind because it still hurts like when I tore it I guess it's just so weak that it hurts like a lot because that was one of my main reasons why I was like oh I need to get this taken care of for I even think about boxing

and so that's one thing down the only other thing is and I talked about this on the last episode Sweeney that I am so heavy, but I don't look like on this heavy. It's just, I would have to fight some, literally, I would have to fight an opponent that's essentially your height for it to make sense. Because everyone that's like as heavy as me, they're all heavy weights.

Because I'm fucking 220. Yeah, you're heavy. Really? Yes. You're 220. You're too 20. They're like, how the fuck are you do 20? Because I have oak trees for legs.

That's like all of my weight. And so it doesn't look assuming Like when you see it I don't look like I'm 200 200 almost 230 pounds You look maybe you look maybe 140 145 I would I would give you on a stretch like 180

I would give you on a very stretch like you look like you're 180 Like if you trim down you can get to like 160 But that's 180 that's 180 max though You know what I mean? Yeah that's what I'm saying like I'm crazy I want to Bro I will show you a picture when I'm 100 Almost 170 pounds when I was 16

and you'll freak out because I was, I'll look like a mummy. I look like I was, I was completely just, I look smaller than you, Chris, but I'm 170 pounds. It's just like, I just, my thighs are too big and it just fucks up. So the mismatch, it'll be weird now. The thing is, also in combat sports, it's not, it's not, it's uncommon, but at the same time, like, there's a guy named Chris Barnett that's in the UFC right now. He's 5-9 and he's like the limit, 260 pounds, 365 pounds. So he's a ball.

He's just a huge guy, but he fights people that are infinitely taller than him because he's so heavy. He has to fight the heavyweight. That dumb-ass motherfucker should obviously lose weight and fight out of way smaller because he's 5-9. But some people do it. But I don't want to do that shit. I don't want to fight some fucking colossus. You know what I'm saying? I got to lose a lot of weight.

The thing for me is like I'm like, I'm like 350-something, bro. Like, I could, like, if I really, like, got into shape, I could get to, like, maybe, like, 270. Like, if I really, like, ship up. But whoever I'm fighting, whoever I fight has to be in my weight class. And my weight class is where motherfuckers get hurt bad. That is the wake heavy, like, super heavy weight is where they get hit and they end up different. That is, like, the weight class I'm at. That's why I'm like. That is true, yeah. I don't know, man. I want to do this, but like, I, the thing is that I know, I know I'm very fast for my size. Like, I know I'm able to move pretty quickly from my size. The thing is, like, I just don't know. Like, I don't know who they get the fight. Who would the fuck what I fight?

I'm not fighting, Hennigan. Get that niggout of my face. Not fighting that thing. The thing to me is like, maybe if you, if you, man. Because I don't have to trim down a lot, right? And over a year of, like, you have to trim down. Yeah. You'll start, like, start now.

How much you like, you can do it, man. Like 350, 5, maybe 360? You're 360 right now? Yeah. Holy shit. I mean huge. I'm gigantic. I don't know.

Like, if I start training, I could definitely do it. I don't know, man. Like, I would get in such a good shape. That's the thing, right? Like the exercise and the shape I get into. That's what's, look, man, you know what you can do. That would be the thing. That's what I want to do it for, really.

You do that. And then, and then if you still fit, you just, you just, you just, I was going to say. So you can just fuck them over and pull out the last second. That's it. That's it. Take the fall. Like walk into the rig.

It was, ah, boom. Crazy night. Celebrate like fucking crazy at the class three. Like, yeah. I fucking got in there. Take the fall. And then get on the fucking ropes like you fucking won. Just be like, yeah.

Fucking, dude, you know when they go with their fucking, like, you just fucking. Everybody. Just do the belt. Don't they do the DX? It's so damn. Oh my God, that would be so fucking funny. Ignorant and shit. What would be,

Sweet, what would be your walkout, man? What would be your walkout? It has to be some New York hip-hop shit. It'd have to be some, like, real New York hip-hop shit. Like, juicy probably. Just robin shit?

Not like some, like juicy. That'd be dope out. Ducy by Biggie. That'd be fire. That'd be great. Everybody would love that. Everybody would love that. Or like some real ignorant patois music, dog.

Like some super Caribbean shit that maybe only Jalen understands what they're saying. Like, only the most Caribbean. I think I know what that guy's talking about. Yeah. It would be a good time, man. If I get my back check, bro. We'll see your conkis. Who would I fight?

Who would I fight? That would be decided when you, you'd have to slim down a lot. You have to lose. You have to know, like 100 pounds. What would be your 100 pounds, right? Because you can, yeah, you'd find like, if you file like a 250 pounds, I think that's fair. And then they can find you somebody in heavyweight, no problem around that. So the target would be like 150, 100 pounds to lose.

Yeah. And you could, if you could, if you started now, you could do it at a way to where you don't just have a shitload of. Yeah, yeah, exactly. Yeah, I'm not dying. I'm not like purging myself. Yeah. Like I wouldn't have to like, but the thing, the thing, Mike, is my cousin, which is called, so the thing is this also another fuck thing. I have fighting experience as well, which is also fucked because I haven't fought in years, dude.

The last time I was like sparring was I was like 17 years old, like doing animation. Like that was a long fucking time ago. But I'd have to also say, like, I can't lie. Like, I have no fighting experience at all. And then I don't. I mean, you can. It's the equivalent of. not having the experience.

I guess, but then I'm like, yeah, I'll get somebody that had never had experience. And then a fucking, some fucking giant ninja walks into the thing. I have to fight for. Let's, let's, but look, let's, listen. I thought this was interesting because, uh, what was, uh, your opponent, Chris, uh, William Hayes or whatever. Because they were, he was saying like, uh, at least that, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the guy, I forgot was there was that Asian gentleman. Yeah, Michael, quick. Because I, after, after, yeah, he was saying, um, what, he was.

you say? His name is Michael Quick. Michael Quick. So he was saying that Haynes only had three weeks of training and he's never boxed before. He was saying that in the ring that you guys like after he won and stuff he was kind of like

flexing, kind of saying like he was like really happy or whatever. But one thing I remember specifically when I was aware of who you were fighting I looked him up and there was like footage of him training. Like this was not for the fight

You don't accept a boxing match with three weeks left to go If you have no training It's insane Right But the idea of him You have no prior experience This felt kind of like a built-in Like a safe thing

If you happen to have beat him To say that he had not trained prior I'm like But he has Why would you say that? I thought that was really I thought that was really bizarre I'm not like

I'm just saying it's bizarre to say If it's not fucking true It's like what is the reason for doing it To either make you look better Like oh I just I just pick this up out of nowhere Or a fail safe to be like Man if you would have fucking mollywop that shit out of it And broke his jaw like it was just hanging backwards

He'd like hey nigga only been doing for three weeks man What'd you expect? Which would have been I actually watched them I watched your fight back Have you watched your fight back? A little bit yeah I watched it in like from the angles Huh

No I didn't watch it I didn't watch it with you guys. Oh, okay. I didn't watch it with you guys. Okay. I got to say, man, because for the angle where I was, obviously you can only see one angle. You're only sitting in one fucking spot. But looking at it with the cameras, like, you did so much better than I thought because it was hard to see.

But like, you hit him quite a bit that I couldn't really see how flush some of your shots were. It was actually kind of nice watching it back. Yeah, it was nice to watch it. The thing that bothered me was that my stances were too wide. Like that was like watching, I was like, my feet are too far apart. I was like, that bothered me

because I worked like a really hard on footwork. Yeah. But the thing that's really weird about it and this is probably like, it's probably obvious in retrospect, but I didn't think about it at all. I had been training in a gym and in a ring,

like a very specific ring. Uh-huh. And the ring. that they had set up in the arena felt very different than the rings that I had trained in.

The rings that I was training in were very bouncy. Like it was like a like almost like kind of like a wrestling. I imagine it was a wrestling. Oh like wrestling. Yeah. Yeah. Right.

So like there's like the whole thing is like one solid surface but it like there's like some give to it. The ring that we fought in in Creator Clash was like concrete boxes, it felt like. And it felt like there were... Like, and I'm not saying it's like...

I'm not saying it felt cheaper. I don't know how they're supposed to feel. All I know is that I was like... I remember once I got in there, I was like, this feels wildly different than what I anticipated it feeling like. And I don't know. It's weird. It's an interesting, you know...

We already talked about it last... Last episode, but it was... It's an awesome fucking thing. And especially for fitness, you could benefit a lot from it. Even if you just started training, even if you just started training as if you were going to do it, just so they could, you know what I mean, just so they could be like, oh, yeah, he might, you know, because it'd be, it's a pretty difficult matchup at currently.

Yeah, they'd have to find like a fucking sumo. Or like, you know what I mean? That'd be so awesome. That'd be so awesome. Although, yeah, like, although that would be pretty sick too. A summa match. Like just one, like one rent. You can wear like the one diaper.

Fuck. That'd be cool as fuck. That'd be cool as shit. That'd be cool as shit. I do it and I tape it with a diaper on of this outside. That would be so fucking awesome. I love that sum of shit. I love that.

You know how people are nowadays. I was watching this guy, Yuri Pajaska. He was doing some of that sumo traditional shit. And just all the comments were just dudes saying like how suss it was. Just because like in any other setting, you just like, oh, those. are sumer wrestlers, but like nowadays, like, oh, that shit sucks. Like, what are you, what are you doing, bro?

Like, it's just butt cheeks are exposed so it's immediately gay. And I was just laughing so much that like, 10 years ago. I watched suma wrestling a few times, but the ones that weren't watching, they weren't like super fat. They were just jacked this shit.

It was like they had chub on them, but they were mostly just walls, just like pushing each other so hard you could hear it. And I'm like, yo, whoa, man. they're going to hurt each other. And when they fly out the fucking ring. And I'm like, yo, I would not do that, man.

I would not do that. I've never, I don't think I've ever sat through. I don't think I've ever seen a sumo wrestling match ever. Like not a real one. I've only seen them in like cartoons or like movies or like some like, I don't know. I understand the concept of them. But. Are they punching it?

Like, what are they doing? No. It's, it's just, it's, there's, there's the shoving parts, but it's more of just like, I'm going to just thrust my weight into you. It's extremely ritualistic, extremely respectable. It's just trying to get the person out of the ring, right? That's, that's, that's, yeah. And there's a threshold.

Yeah, so you just get, you kind of ring them out. And the thing is, there really isn't weight classes. And that's what's really fucked because there are some motherfuckers that, you know, There's in listed ridiculous. It's the size differences, but I mean, fuck it. I should try it. I should try sumo wrestling. I want to go up.

I want to go up. I want to sumo wrestle somebody who's 420. That's their way. I'm at 130. Hold on. Let me weigh myself. I wonder how much I've lost. Hold on.

I'll be right back. Oh, much you dropped? She'll digers like 115 now. He's like, yo, I'm 87 pounds. It goes like, I'm 83 pounds. like, yo, what? You're sick. He takes his shit up and it looks crazy.

It looks crazy. He looks like the machinist. He looks like, what's that fucking guy in the machinist? It looks like stumpy. Stimpy. Christian Bell, right? In the machines? Yeah.

Yeah, Christian Bell. There you go. 131. 132. Okay, so it's lost a few pounds already. So I've lost about seven pounds. pounds, which is nice. Oh, like that.

Like that Will Smith movie. When he likes seven, seven pounds. He rips out all his guts. Do you remember he rips out all his guts and donate some to people on the fly? He takes his tummy out and gives to somebody on the spot. You never see seven pounds? He's like, here you go. And he digs in his stomach, takes out all his viscera and puts it in someone's hand.

And he's like, have a good night. And he walks off. And the person just slurts it up. You know, that's, first of all, that's a disgusting. sound. Second of all, second of all, I can't tell if you're fucking with me. Because that sounds... You never saw seven pounds

Will Smith? And the Hispanic lady, I forgot her name. She's really pretty, though. Is Eve a Mendez? Gloria F. Stefan? No. No, it's Jennifer Lopez. It was him and Jennifer Lopez. It was Selena and Will Smith. And then he was like, A, Salinas.

Would you like seven pounds of my torso, man? He just... He just... He's just eating a pole. All the fucking, all the fucking visceral. Just sucking it up, drinking it, looking it up. It's hot, man. Ah, that's hot, man. Like, da me du panza.

And he's like, ah, he, here's my panza. He's like, ah, jealcese. He's like, ah, jealces. Ben Thomas, sending a text message while driving caused a car crash in which seven people died. Six. You guys are fucking assholes. I thought I was expecting some weird sci-fi shit. Yeah, yeah, you like, yeah, he donates his ass to, like, uh...

He don't he donates his asshole to prison people, the prisoners. He don't need his raw bottle of his ass cheek. Can you imagine you go to prison and you start renting your ass? I mean, I probably... I think that's a 100% thing that happens. Yeah, I guess so. I guess you're right. What am I saying?

Yeah, I guess I don't think about jail. I don't think about jail too much on account of, I'm white. I mean, if you're good, yeah. If you're going to, you're white passing, that's true. Yeah, I'm white passing. I've never, I've never had to think about it at all. All I need to do is make sure I was running faster than the slowest, slightly darker person. That's it.

You know, never let them find out your name. That's it. Never give them your name. Yeah, yeah, I would always say my name is, my name is Jim Ryan. That's my name. Give him Smith. That's my name is Chris Smith. No, no, my name is Jim Ryan Smith.

That's what I tell to every police. officer and they're like well well by god son go home head on home my god kid what do you do around with all these mommy people my name is marcus phoenix did you guys happen to see by the way uh the the live action flounder oh yeah yeah i didn't look at it too hard but i just like this looks dude i think the bird looks worse man there's a bird i didn't see the bird yeah the fucking you know the seagull there's a seagull and then there's a seagull and the little There's a pelican. I'll be real.

I haven't seen The Little Mermaid since I haven't seen the Little Mermaid since the 90s. You're probably right. So I don't. I thought I thought it was, you're probably right. I don't even know. A white bird. If I'm being very honest, if I'm being very honest, entirely honest, 100% 100% honest, 100% honest. Little Mermaid is my least favorite Disney movie.

I've never given a fuck about it. You want to know why? You want to know why? Why? Because you're a fucking man. You're a boy when it came out too. Exactly. That shit was not for us.

at all. I didn't even have a cool. It didn't even have a cool guy character. We were kind of like, you didn't even have like beasts. No. Eric's a fucking pussy. Huh?

Or was it the name of the Asian guy? You know what's interesting? You know what's interesting? I only learned this recently. The guy who voices Prince Eric and the Little Mermaid, guess who it is? Who? Oh, somebody of, I don't know.

It's somebody of great, it's somebody of great importance to us specifically. Clancy Brown? No. Oh, keep David. Holy shit. Keep David. No.

It's Christopher Daniel Barnes. It's the voice of Spider-Man from the 90s animated series. That is very cool. He voices Prince Eric. That's very cool. That's the only reason I care about the war we're meeting slightly. I'll follow you to the ends of the earth. I'll kill you, Ursula.

I'll kill you, Ursula. I'll pull you. The end to the ocean. Dude, he, yeah, but, yeah, I'm looking through, like, I don't know, Sebastian looks like a... It's just their real... They're real animals. You stop just that quick.

It's boring. You're like Sebastian's like a... They're just animal. He's like a real Caribbean... Real crab. No, it's just... The character designers were just like... It's so boring.

The character designers were literally just like, what does Google say? Yeah. Google, uh, what does a flounder look like? Oh, okay. Uh, we'll do that then. Better if it was just like a cook. piece of fish.

Yeah, just like, just a piece of tilapia just with seasons floating around. That is crazy. I haven't had talapia in a while. I had it, we bought a big bag of tilapia

a couple weeks ago. Talapia is the only fish that I, I think I like as a cooked, as cooked fish. I'm not really, I'm not big on salmon. I'm not big on like, I don't know.

I had sore fish once and I was like, what the fuck is this? It's pretty good. It's fine. Halib, it's good. The thing about, I don't know, most fish, most fish that I like, I'll eat raw for sushi. Like, and I like, and I like it in that context. But the second I heat it up, I'm like, I don't know. Not into it. I am so the opposite. It's like, to me, sushi is just like, it's just the antithesis of being human to me.

You don't like sushi? I am a human that knows how to use fire. Why the fuck wouldn't I use it? That is crazy. Me, every, all meat, almost everything tastes better with fire. You don't like. sushi? Why, when I can cook a fish and make it taste better, why the fuck what I... It doesn't, though. That's kind of, that's why. It totally does. No, but this is exactly why. So why don't you eat tartar as a burger? Then why don't you eat tartar? A burger, a tartar. I don't need some... Listen, here's the thing. Why? But why though?

What do you mean? I've just never had it. I've always just decided to have... Well, my whole point is, well, why don't you just eat a raw ass fucking burger? You can't eat it. It won't kill you. No, but that's what I'm saying. A raw burger, to me, to me, taste worse than a cook burger, but I've had cooked fish that tastes infinitely worse than sushi. And that's why I don't understand. That's why I don't like fish generally is because like I only, if I'm going to have meat, chances are I'm going to want to cook it, right? That's generally the rule.

But if I cook this meat, it gets worse. Fuck that. I completely disagree by. That's fine. I'm not a sign of saying you don't like sushi. I mean, it's totally fine. Your assessment is fine of how you feel. I just imagine that, like, the, the, I mean, always, it's putting it up to the animal test.

The primitive animal test. No. But the raw food versus the cook food. They're going to go for the cook food every single time. The animals? Every single time. Yes. Well, yeah, but I wouldn't be surprised by that.

Well, see, that's what I'm saying. Like, I'm fine with you preferring your food that way, but that is not the normal. That is, that is all the way. The way that I think, the way, the sushi is prepared in a way that people that don't like fish can enjoy it. That is how it. it is. That's the point of sushi in general. People that don't normally like fish can enjoy sushi. That's how it works.

I was kind of going to go into that. Personally, I don't eat anything that comes out of the water. Like, period. I haven't eaten fish genuinely in like 24 years. I don't eat fish at all. Right? I've had sushi never in my life either because I just don't like fish. So I'm like, why am I going to like this

uncooked version of fish? I've smelled my grandma. My grandma can cook. some porky and red snapper after the point where it smells amazing but it smells good but I know it's fish and I don't want to eat it I don't have a problem with fish

Oh yeah now it's not not Particle not but it was It was um the idea of like Oh um I don't like um I don't like I had bone one time one time obviously I ate fish the bones are all taking out when I was little kiggas You get Chris probably does the same thing when they cook you fish right They fry fish for you

they give it to you. It's just a big thing of fish on your plate. And you have to eat through parts. You know, there's little bits of bones in there's like that too. But you're taught how to do that. One time, I got scratched really bad in my throat. And I had to like hack up a bone. It doesn't that moment I haven't eaten fish.

And then it's gotten to the point now where it's like, I haven't eaten fish so long that might as well just not eat fish. So it's been like over two decades. I just don't eat it. I get it. I get it. I just feel like there's, it's kind of like sushi. maybe with most sushi, there isn't enough fish in there for you to even like, it's just like, it's like lightly seasoned and you're essentially eating seaweed and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and it's pretty about the seaweed and rice.

That's so crazy. I mean, not what that is. He's right. I mean, not what that is. What do you mean? What do you mean? That's it. That's what's, you're thinking of this is, what does I think that's wrong?

Chris, it's mostly rice. So you're, so you're thinking of, sorry, you're right. So you're thinking of sashimi. Yeah. Are you thinking of sashimi? What I think. Sushi? No, no, no.

So here's the, there are sushi rolls. There's a difference. There's a sushi roll, which is like the general kind of like American, like, everybody kind of, okay. Sushi is seaweed-wrapped rice with, like, a cucumber and, like, imitation crab and, like, a little bit of fish in there. That's, like, the general idea of sushi. And I don't like that sushi, honestly, but that's more about the cucumber and all imitate. I hate an imitation crab. Not a big fan of cucumber.

Seweed's fine, but, like, I don't need it. So to me, my suit, the way that I eat sushi is, it's. the ball of rice with the sashimi on it. That's my ideal sushi. With like obviously like sauces and various like fucking things around it. But that's how I eat sushi. Or like just straight up like piles of sashimi. Like I love that shit.

Yeah. See to me that's the thing that's, that's the part that's insanity to me because it's like, yeah, let me have this not cooked meat when I could cook it and it tastes better. I don't. That's the thing. See, that's the thing I disagree. I know you're saying to you.

I know to you say it. Yeah. To me it tastes worse. And to me, it's creepy, it's weird to me that it's the only meat that tastes worse to me. Like, it's all, every other meat, every other meat, like, you can't eat raw chicken. You're, you'll fucking die, probably. Raw beef is like a little bit more, it's, it's, it's more accepted. It's actually, like, one of the more weird ones.

You can totally eat raw beef. It's just, like, with anything. Yeah, I would prefer, I would, I would, most meat, I would prefer to cook it. Because, like, if the raw version of it is either really, really, unappealing or really reprehensible. Whereas fish to me, I'll have, like, somebody will cook me a salmon and I'll be, I'll be eating this warm,

this hot meat, right? And I'll be thinking, fuck, man, I wish this was chicken. Fuck, man, I wish this was duck. Because it's just like, it's just, it's the worst kind of meat to have in that way. But it's the only type of meat that you can have raw. And it's delicious.

I just, I don't agree. I mean, that's fair, whatever. I eat it. I just, I eat raw. It's not like, it's not gross. It's just, it's even like a cold cuts. I'm like, oh, I enjoy a sandwich every once in a while, but I usually, like, I'll get like smoked turkey. I'll buy these smoked turkey cold cuts. And then I'll go and fucking put that shit on the fucking on the skillet. Oh, that's interesting. Better warm. That's interesting. See, I, I, I'm a cold sandwich person. I agree. I mean, I'll fuck up, I'll fuck up a cold sandwich all day.

Toaster, toasting. Tasted sandwich bread, bro? Toasted sandwiches. But I am specifically, I am specifically a cold sandwich person to the point where, like, I rarely, if ever, have a hot sandwich. If I have a hot sandwich, it's a burger. Like, that's, that's how I feel about it. You're missing out, bro. The melted cheese and a toasted bread with the mayo on top. They're missing out, man.

I mean, there's nothing better than a toasted piece of, like, bread. Holy shit. I do, like, toasted, like, BLTs and stuff, like things, or, like, like, a grilled cheese. A solid grilled cheese is, like, really, like, that's, like, a really child-ass meal. dumb. That's a real child-ass meal. How stupid are humans? What? Yeah, yeah. I'm just, the conversation that we're having of how picky we are, which it's so fucking stupid. You know, it's because we fucking can be. Because we don't, we're not, we're not in the fucking jungles. Uh, yeah, that's all you guys dwell in fucking tree-climbing, fucking river, river-dwelling motherfuckers. That's chill. Fuck you guys. You uncivilized bastards. Oh my God That's not what I was saying at all You fucking

You fucking tree climbers I was just like Sudan's going through some like Sudan's going to some crazy Like Civil War shit Fuck those niggas Fuck those niggas Fuck those niggas

There is one of them right now Is tuned in the snark tank You know While he's hiding in a fucking House that's I hope they find him I hope they find you nigga Fuck you

Fuck you Fuck you Can you imagine Can you imagine somebody is in... Can you imagine somebody is in an in an Anne Frank-esque scenario where they're hiding from, like, dangerous warlords? But they're also... But they're just so happy to be listening to our podcast. And then their headphones disconnect.

And then we were just blaring out from this bush. And then they're gone now. I would love... I would love... Can someone please make a snark tank edit where Anne Frank is listening to us. and she gets found. Don't do that. That would be so funny.

Come on, dude. That's hilarious. No, listen, you know why? Because you know, you know, the people who have ruined jokes like that are? Who? The people who, yeah, those people. You know exactly what I'm talking about. It's like, I, look, man, a good and frank joke, that hits.

I love that shit. But I can't do it anymore. Because now somebody's going to be, like, lo, that's a good joke. Also, for real, though, I think that that was a bad person. I'm glad she's gone. And then, like, those are the people, like, it's ruined every. I tweeted a few days ago, right? Like, there was a few days ago I was on Twitter, right? And it was some fucking maniac, like, giving, going credit for credit for Hitler. And I was like, dude. Yeah, it's, it's wild. You can't, you can't tell them. See, a while ago, it was, it was really safe because everybody understood that

everybody was kind of was fucking around because everybody that I knew that everybody everybody that I associated with understood yeah this guy's crazy or this is crazy shit isn't it funny to laugh at but now it's like it's not so obvious anymore and that's that sucks because I love I love that shit it brings me so much joy the amount of material that Sweeney and I have come up with just purely surrounding the N-word is hysterical and you'll never you'll never hear it it's so funny it's so we got one We have one, we have one joke that is so funny. Like, it's so funny that if we made the joke, I know comments that we'll contact us.

Like, movies, what contact us would be like. Movie, yeah, Dr. Movies himself. Well, Conjay, they'll be like, hello, this is Mr. Movies. We heard your joke. We've got to have it. They'll be like, look, guys, you guys want a job in the writing room? Like, shit like that. That's so funny.

We have, we have laughed. We've laughed pretty hard on this podcast many, many times. We have still not laughed even remotely as hard as we laugh in private. Derek, you've been there. You've seen us all together in the house making wild-ass jokes. And it's fun. Yeah. It's fun.

But unfortunately... It's good. Unfortunately, you've ruined it. I had some guy, like, in my mentions recently, like, man, I used to like... What is it? I was a big fan of Ray Gun. the shame he's in SJW now and I just, I retweeted him. I was like, kill yourself retard with like a little heart next to it.

Because I was just like, what are you talking? Like, what is this? I just don't like idiots. And I never have. And I had no problem telling you to kill yourself. So I wanted, I was going to say something, right? I saw that, right? And I was going to say something, right?

There was a little stupid ass pain video. I was going to say something. And I was like, you know what? It's not worth it. It's not worth it. It's not worth of packing this, man. I like it. That video was really,

that video was really funny to me because I was watching, I tried to watch it on stream, but it kept buffering, but I watched a little bit of it. And the whole thing is like, the whole thing is like, you know,

Chris is, Chris was like a very talented and funny and creative guy. Like, he's pretty cool. What happened since then? Oh, his channel's not doing well.

It's like, oh, that's it? Of course not. I haven't been posting. Oh, I know. I know exactly what you're talking about. Yeah, yeah, the I Hippig Group video.

And I was like, oh, okay, cool. I mean, I guess the myriad of podcasts that we do don't count. But I like these people. Go ahead, good. But no, that's what I'm saying. It's like they're not actually fans or listeners or viewers. They have no fucking clue.

You think I've just been sitting doing nothing? They have you figured out without ever talking you or anything remotely? Like, oh, yeah, he's not doing what, like you said, I don't post on there. The same, like, well, like, you have two successful podcasts. Yeah, and you stream. And he's like, yeah. And I spent like nine months. And I spent nine months fucking boxing.

So I apologize. Don't worry. There'll be more stuff. I'm especially now. I got like a bunch of stuff written, but like it's just so weird. I don't know. It's a weird. It's a weird environment.

You did another one. You shared a, because I've been getting a couple of these too. It was. Oh, the DMs. Being a grifter or something. Yeah, yeah. Or you're sold out. You sold out because you're not.

ball like just just say say what it is because I don't want to paraphrase it yeah so the the the message that I got and I get these occasionally like not super often but like they I have like a handful and it was let me see if I could find it

it's funny it's funny really fun like it it cracked me up because I couldn't I could and by the way like when I post these DMs I always make sure to see if the person serious I went to their account it's years of you know retweeting the exact people that you assume they reach me.

It's real. It's real. This is a genuine opinion that they have. And it's, I got a DM from this lapsed, uh, I guess this lapsed right wing fan or whatever. And he says,

why do you cuck out and abandon your audience? You sold out hard when you could have made bank staying based. Hope it was worth it. Which is like, I love it. Because to write that, to write that, you have to not know the language that you're speaking.

You could have made bank, but you didn't. So you sold out? What? Like, I was sitting there reading it and I was like, I can't believe, I can't believe I got a DM this. Because usually, like, I'll get a DM like that. And it's like really stupid, but it's really long winded. You know what I mean? It's like, it's like this long, like paragraph.

And it's like, uh, so to see something so stupid and so concise made me, I was grinning like a friend. when I got that when I got that DM because I was like oh my God what an amazing example of just how

dumb what an inspiring idiot what I couldn't believe what a fantastic moron I have to tell sometimes well I had to tell Jojo like

yes you got to stop because she would usually try to talk to me about some of the absolute just sewage that was in my common sections oh yeah yeah and I'm like bro

I tell you I told Lily, I told Lily, I totally the same thing, dude. Like someone, someone like insulted Lily and I was like, dude, this girl, this girl you're making fun of, I'm sure makes more than your mom and dad put together. Like, just go on about your life and just don't worry about her. She's really okay. Like, don't, like, I told her, like, honey, don't, don't engage. Don't engage. It's not what, like.

You definitely can. You get every once in a while I will I'll be honest though My my aisle just kind of peek over the fence a little bit No no no it's fun it's fun poking them It's fun I gotta look at fun poking them It's fun making them mad and seeing them overreact But you can't engage too much because what happens is That all they want is for you to engage

That's all they want That's all they want from you Well some of these people seem like they're trying to save my soul or something. Yeah, yeah. It's religious is what it is. Yeah. I got to get Derek back from the...

I got to get Derek back from the left. I got to do it, Mom. I got to get this guy to grift hard. Like, they want it. It's the thing that's so crazy. They want it. You know what it is? They miss you.

They miss us. Because I knew from the second that video started where it's like Chris Reagan was like really, really talented and really, really funny. I was like, oh, yeah, yeah. I still am. Don't worry. You suck in me. But you're upset because I'm not on your roster anymore or you've like taken me off your roster.

And you're like, man, I wish I had somebody that talented and funny on my roster. I wish we could just get this guy back. And it's like, bro, I'm where I was. I'm exactly where I was. They don't see. I feel so. It's actually like astounding how little like my worldview has shifted at all, if any, like maybe like slightly on some issues, but not really.

Not I don't think I would disagree all that much at all with like 2016 me and vice versa to be quite funny. I've gotten wildly conservative. So I don't know about you guys. It's crazy. It's crazy. The shit I be thinking sometimes is scary, bro. I'm just like, dang, I was really talking to somebody about this. Move to Florida and Texas or some shit.

You're like, damn, man, I can't wait. I was in Florida and I was like, I belong here. You were so happy. I belong here. Using all sorts of slurs, talking about the they, them's all crazy. It felt good. It felt good. I agree with you, though, Chris, though.

Like, though, about the, not, you're remaining relatively the same, because I've reflected on my old content. I've actually even combed through some of the stuff. Some of the things that I thought were dumb or some of the takes that I had that people were misusing, I took them down because that's one thing that I did notice

that there was a lot of people that they liked me saying certain things, but they didn't necessarily agree with me. They just liked that I was criticizing people that they don't like, but they didn't like them for... They didn't like them because they were simply existed. But they would never, but they would never want that,

they would never want that mirror turned towards them. Right. That is, when that happened, when that happened, when I, when I started shifting my focus on, because the whole thing when people,

I also saw T.J. Kirk, the amazing atheist, something's very similar. He said something very similar. He said, I'm doing the exact same shit that I've always been doing. I, in the whole anti-SadW sphere or whatever,

he was shitting on people who were, very uppity who were trying to clamp down on stuff they were trying to interject their ideals onto everybody when it was like there's a time and a place for everything and stop trying to fucking put all of your ideals in this art that nobody gives a fuck

about vice versa blah blah blah blah all this shit was going on and then just shifting to these fucking people on the right that are doing the same thing but to a way more extreme right like fucking Anita Sarkeesian and all these other motherfuckers were never doing anything that

put anyone in danger versus we open the fucking show with saying damn trans people have it bad right now like there's a very huge fucking difference right yeah these motherfuckers can't see that though they can't see that i'm like y'all are doing the same shit but actually way worse and the thing is this right the thing is this right and that's that was the biggest problem i was like the most of the youtube community it was the ideas and it's it's not you guys as far it took me to it's me reflecting as well to see it's not you you can't control who abhorbs your content that is the problem right so what happened is that people take things out of context and they championing you for a snippet of your idea but not the full concise thought that you made it's like oh yeah the left

I want I want I want to push back on that yes yes it is I do want to let me let me I do want to I kind of I don't 100% like you see not being able to control I think that's how I felt But I don't think that's true Because you can if you go out of your way To tell these people to fuck off Say for example Something that I never even thought about

You can do that right I agree If I I just I never did it That's the thing But now like say I've hemorrhaged quite a bit of subscribers When I finally started telling these pieces of shit

Like I would just say things That would seem very simple And it's like how are you following me? Because I said If you think, for example, if you think Nicholas J. Flintis has any good ideas, get the fuck off of my channel. And then there's like two people in the comic section that are like, oh, I think, and I'm like, why are you following me? If you think this guy has anything of value. But this is the thing that like, since I didn't really like make it very obvious because I feel like I shouldn't have to.

But you kind of have to because these people are really dumb. so I just feel like I didn't do my due diligence of telling these people to fuck off. I don't think that's the case right now. The thing, the thing, the thing, the thing, the thing, the thing, the thing, the thing, the thing to the thing to the people really misunderstand is like, oh, man, you're, uh, trashing your old audience or whatever. And it's like, no. Like the, the audience that has actually been paying attention to me understands and understood the whole time exactly where I was covering. And some of those people are still around. Most of those people, most of those people are still around.

I saw the comments from them all the fucking time. They're in my Twitch chat. They've been there the whole fucking time. They knew when I told everybody that I was like a left-leaning person that I wasn't lying for no reason. They just, they like, they listened. It's the people who thought they were fans of me, but really just wanted me to repeat their opinions to them. Right. Right.

Those are the people that I don't care to entertain because I don't, if you need me to regurgitate your opinions back to you, I don't want you You're too You're too insecure to entertain Yeah that's how I feel about it It's like I don't need you That is that's the best way to have it The best mentality to have

I agree with that 200% It's it's just That period of time was so volatile And disgusting And it's just like everything And so many people just It was cool to watch right It was fun

It was fun It was way funer this shit that's going on now, bro. Like, like, I've, I'll tell you, I've made multiple videos that I just didn't release because it felt cathartic making the video and that's kind of all I really cared about. Back then, I was having fun, just making fun of silly shit. And me talking about like, oh, like said, like trans people being in danger or all this stuff, it isn't fun.

It's like fucked up, you know? The thing is that it was a joke before. It was funny. Once upon the time it was funny Now it's not funny What was the most serious thing The most serious thing that was happening Wasn't even that serious really

Like that was normally It was like surrounded in feminism really And it was like Third Wave lazy feminism It wasn't we weren't even talking about like People that we were making fun of They weren't talking about like say Real shit that like I 100% am 4

Like whenever we talk about like Iran Like issues that's going on in Iran I'm like 100 for that shit. Let's go, women. Like, your liberation all day. They weren't talking about this. They're talking about spaghetti straps and man spreading and shit. You know what? The other thing, too, is, like, I feel like there was like this weird

disconnect between people, like, assuming that, like, when you're making fun of BuzzFeed for calling man spreading misogyny, you know what I mean? Like, where it's like, oh, this is massacredding is misogynistic. And you're pointing like, ah, that's fucking stupid. There's a bunch of people who, for some reason,

join that video, who are like, yeah, misogyny is not real. you know what I mean Where it's like They make this like How did you get here? They make this like huge leap in logic Where like

Because this Then this It's like a really poorly scripted Boolean If you're if you're a coder So it's like Can I tell you something? Oh you go ahead Yeah

No I was just gonna say like Dude misogyny is real Right It doesn't mean I'm not going to make Jokes That are vaguely sexist If not outright Basically

but the difference is I understand that that's a joke right and I I'm not serious and so when people are like oh yeah man spreading is obviously not misogyny man spreading is the dumbest shit in the world nobody should care about that at all but then you make the leap in saying like yeah and therefore you know Andrew Tate makes sense it's like well these are very very different things

you gotta slow down buckaroo yeah yeah you got an easy booker Yeah, and the opinion hasn't changed at all. Like, if Andrew Tate had showed up five years ago, six years ago, I am 100% confident. I would have been like, what is this loser doing? Nah, he would have got me. I am a million percent confident. You would have got me.

When I was, when I was 17, I don't know. Exactly, bro. He would have got me. He would have got me, bro. Angry, angry, horny Kingston that keeps getting fucking with my girls. I'd be like, I fucking hate him. I fucking hate them. Their property.

I could, I could. I could. I could. I could never do it. I was raised by women, so I never, I never had the ability to hate women genuinely. Like, I never had the chance, you know, like, some people had, like, just a mom and a dad. All I had, like, a mom and a dad. And they could, like, cling to their dad and be like, yeah, fuck women.

Dad's cool. But I only had, like, my grandma who raised me when my mom died. So she's, like, objectively doing me a favor. So I was just like, ah, man. Women ain't bad. I have a cousin. He's actually, he's actually well-adjusted now. But when he was growing up, he didn't have a favorite.

He was raised by a pigeon and a lava lamp. That was his only family. His last name, Bundy? No, no, no. There's some questions, guys. We're running really 12th star time already, actually. I want to see you guys. Later, later.

Later, idiot. Later, bye. Fuck you. We're not reading questions anymore. Fuck you. That part of the show is gone. We don't do that show. We don't do that no more.

That's out. That's another $25 on. Patreon. Yeah, you gotta be $25. Pay $25 to get your question. Oh, man. All right, so let me, let me sift through these questions. Let's go.

Let's see. One dollar patrons been up to two. You got to give two bucks now. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Double all the patron levels. Yeah, what else? What else? What else we got?

Yeah, he's just double all of them. Double them two, 10, 30, fucking $53,000. Okay, so here's a, here's a, here's a lot. one from Oregon or what is that Oregon Trail O'Greegresu Look man

Whatever the fuck your name is Ogressuvie Fuck you That's a horrible I can't read this at all I can't read this name at all Anyway he says hello gentlemen Longtime listener first time

Using Patreon after seeing Chris get Pased up in a grossly unfair Matchup against the Black Weabo Aboo You three helped me Keep my sanity last year As I listened to roughly 58,000 minutes of your podcast.

Jesus. Nice. That is fucking insane to hear that. Yeah, that's a gross number. Thank you for everything. Anyway, I have an interesting hypothetical for you three. Do you remember a show called Shaolin Showdown? Yes.

There's an episode where Omi has the yin and yang separated into two bodies. My question is this. If all of your good and all of your evil were separated into two individual bodies, how would your good and evil selves act? What would they do? I don't even want to think about this. Bro, the evil me would be bad, bro. I'd be pretty, I wouldn't be, I would be concerning, I think.

I don't think I would be too evil, but, like, you would, I, I would be a cause for concern. Is the best way that I could put it. You would have to be locked up immediately your evil side swing. Like, it would have to be, yeah, evil me would roar. It would be roar. in a room by itself just be like, yo, whatever that is, don't let that out. Sweeney would seek out old women on the street just to roar at and harass.

And I don't know, I feel like I would, man, my evil self, my good self would be the nicest fucking person in the world. Like, I'm a pretty good person, except for all of the evil things. So I think generally... Shut the fuck up, you idiot. I hate when you, I hate you. I'm a pretty good person except for all of my evil. That's everything, you idiot.

Everything. Yeah, I'm just saying. I'm just saying, like, no, you misunderstanding me. What I'm saying is, see, I understand why you got upset because you misunderstood what I was saying. Don't do, I'm going to clear things out. Sorry, sorry. What I'm saying, what I'm saying is I'm a pretty good person, but there's parts of me that are evil. And without those evil parts, I'd be pretty, pretty, you know,

good person. If my good side, my good side would try to be Spider-Man. My evil side would be a... I would be absolutely... My evil side would be a fuck boy, no doubt. A million percent. Like, just like, I would not call

people. I would fuck people and not call them. I would... And you know what? I'd post about it, too. I'd be like, this is hilarious. I'd post like a picture of, like, them looking sad. You can you... You get a...

It'd be a picture of them. It'd be a picture of them with a money shot after you insult them. Like right after you're done, you say some wild shit to them. Then you snap a picture right after. You're like fucking bitch and you walk off. That's excellent. I couldn't even finish. I couldn't even finish.

No, I don't know. What is the evil, like, is it like giving into like every single impulse? Is that what it is? Every bad aspect of you. Every aspect of you think is bad is all present. Do you have evil tendencies that you ignore? I don't think that. I have not good.

I have bad thoughts. Like a lot, like there was, I'll never forget this. And I've told this to a lot of people. I've told this to my nephew included. I've told my nephew that like there was a point when he was really, really young where I was walking behind him. And I thought, I have no animosity towards this person. I have a really good relationship with this kid, actually. If I kicked him down the stairs and he just perished immediately, everybody, no one would believe that I did it.

Like no one. Like no one would believe it. I could get away with it. And if he somehow survived, even he would be, like, convinced that I wouldn't have done it. He would be convinced that a ghost did it. And I could probably gaslight him into thinking a ghost did it. And I had that thought. Or even, you know what?

I'll tell you this. This is another evil. And I didn't ask, I didn't act on it. I am, and I have the capacity if I had no conscious to be an elaborately mean person. Because I remember thinking specifically before, and I told you this, Sweeney, I think. when Froggy was initially my opponent for the creator clash and we were kind of messaging back and forth

and we were like we were getting friendly and I remember thinking like oh man I don't want to get too friendly with him because it would be it'll be harder to punch him and I had the thought of wow you know what I should do if I was to be like a real piece of shit no no I should give my Instagram account

to somebody else and they can carry on a friendship with Froggy, like just purely through DMs, and like share like really intimate stories about like my life. He can make up whatever the fuck he wants, like trade stories, get real close. And that way he's really endeared to me,

but I haven't been talking to him at all the whole time. And I had that thought. I was like, what an evil thing. I didn't do that, obviously. But the thought was. there the thought was there so my evil self i think could be like a pretty formidable a little like nothing crazy like i wouldn't do anything too crazy oh my evil self would be dangerous dude it's it's so you have a competitive edge right but the reason you

want to do that that's not good though not you're not you're not you don't want to do it too fuck with him you want to do it no competitive edge exactly that evil well no no it's still very evil you're not you're not no i mean it's it's wrong to do it's wrong to do you, right, but it's not like you have, you have. I'm not scaring anybody. There is, but he, I'm not scared. I'm not scaring anybody.

No one's a fucking scared. Listen to me. Listen to me. I yeah, yeah. This is how I talk to my wife. I'm like, I'm not fucking, I'm not fucking scaring you. Shut the fuck up.

You got her against the wall. You're scream at her and she's crying. Just, you know, a little, little pressure on the neck. Joejo is saying, stop, Derek. I'm scared. And you say, I'm not scaring anybody. I'm not scared. Why are you scared? What are you scared about? Fuck you're so scared for.

One time I was, this is real, I was really upset. This was like an ex-girl from like 2014 or something where we were pretty much hanging on by a thread. And I was pretty much done, but she was like, let's try to hash this out. Let's meet up. I met up with her after work. She hopped in my car and she wasn't saying anything. And I'm like, I thought you came here to talk. and she just would and I was like get the fuck out of my car essentially I was like this is it was I wasted my time I felt like what the hell was going on and so she's all sad crime whatever the fuck and then later she says you were so intimidating and I'm like I did I literally did nothing I did like I didn't I didn't raise my I didn't I wasn't angry I did I was so mad that I'm like me my dude I was a twig at that point too this is when I was like 180 and I was already starting to look a little malnourish you know like say when I get 170, it look like a fucking stick figure. So I'm small. I'm 5'6. This bitch is like maybe even an inch taller than me and she's bigger.

She probably could have fought me and did okay. And I'm like, I'm intimidated. I did nothing. And then that's the type of shit that makes me want to actually be intimidating. And just like I should have just grabbed her head and just, you know, kept pressing until you start hearing the cracks a little bit. And then you stop. And then you stop. But like just like just to her about that point, you know.

But I didn't do it. I'm a gentleman. Of course. But that was very cathartic. I just wanted to get that off my chest, man. If I, all of the worst aspects of me were at least, I would,

people would say something I didn't like, and I would just strike them and keep striking them. And I'm like, all right, who wants brunt? See, I'm not a person. And I would just take these.

I would take, I have very, I have very, very, very bad anger problems, but I realized that my anger would get me killed. so I learned how to put a cap on it. See, I have a temper. I don't like raising my voice.

I don't raise my voice of people. Like Lily, like I love Lily. I love her to death, right? My partner in crime, I'm going to marry that girl one day. There have been times where I've been very upset

and I've wanted to just scream at her until I calm myself down. But I know if I scream at her, she'll be like, oh no, all black. are gonna he's gonna kill me he's black he's black and long as i'm much bigger your wife would think that listen he would do that and get the cops on you and they would beat you senseless they'd beat me says and then it would deport her bro listen yeah sure no one would have happy bro

no one would be happy look look like so none of us are none of us are really violent like our evil selves wouldn't really be that's not true though because for him for me i'm not necessarily Oh, no, hon. So for me, I'm not really violent at all, like, at all. However, there are some people on this planet that I feel like that need to be beaten to death. And so the evil version of myself, 100%. I would do two things. I would, I would griff, like, quartering or whatever.

I would, yeah, I would make money. Right, right. Sell out your ideals for money. Yeah, for 100%. And then the second thing, those same people who I'd be pretending to be, I would beat them to death. Like, so I would go to meet up. I would go to me up. I would be it in like some

Like I would fucking like Horrible Why is that we can't For some reason I want to smash Matt Walsh's face So hard In Minecraft Not for some reason

There is a In Minecraft Yeah sure In Minecraft sure Like I Like I want to Like I said I want to box Matt Walsh

At Creator Class 3 I would I would not even train Like I would give him Every advantage And I guarantee you I would kill him in the ring In Minecraft

But like I would I would Fucking I would I'm telling you I'm willing To shatter my hand to hit him as hard as I've I'm you max damage it you go max damage I would risk it off I guess we don't There is something about his fucking face

That needs to be punched so Fuck it like it just needs to be Like out of all of those people Out of all of those fucking people Look at that nigger Look at him look at a picture of him And get stare at it for 10 seconds I guarantee you, you're going to get really fucking angry.

And you're going to be, I didn't know I had that in me. I didn't even know. I know I don't have that. I have it. I have a temper and I get angry, but I don't, I never get angry. Like, I never take it out on a living thing. I'll take it out on him all day, man. I definitely, I definitely had a cat that made me really mad and I didn't have that cat anymore.

All right. Let's move on. Let's move on. Let's move on. I can't. God. God. Yeah, I fucking, oh, fucking treat.

That was like a fucking cat, man. Fuck that motherfucker. And Dennis Praker. I've always wanted to beat up an old person. That just seems like kind of fun, you know? Yeah. I feel like I would do one point five damage. Why are you hitting me?

It hurts. Why are you hitting me in this ring? Uh, so dumb. Oh, my God. Let's get one more. Let's get one more before you got to end. Let's get a few. Let's get a few.

Okay. Uh, uh, shameless plug Spencer on YouTube, wrote in. He says, hello Christopher, Ray the gun, radical centrist and Mikey Moisbous. Uh, Mois Mouse mouth. Been watching since episode one. Let's go. Not zero. Zero's a good.

Hey, fuck you. How dare you? Zero's the psychic pebbles one. But finally have, uh, finally have money to pay. I know you all are mostly into. welcome by the way. I know you're all are mostly into video games

but you got any book suggestions in case you all want some but not buddy is amazing and the whole Dresden File series is great well thanks for welcome aboard by the way but I'm a big

I will always chill for childhood's end I love that book that's I think Arthur C. Clark that's like sci-fi it's really fucking cool but as far as like a really sincerely I mean this House of Leaves is fucking crazy

If you've not heard of House of Leaves, it's because it's a very, it's a very intimidating book. It's like it's printed in all sorts of weird fucking ways. There's like some pages that are like, where the, like, dialogue is like, it almost looks like the whole book is misprinted, but it's on purpose. And so it's like, it's kind of a game to read it. Like some, some pages are like written backwards and then some pages are written like top to bottom and like diagonal and like, and it's, it's really cool.

I haven't finished it, but, like, I've gotten through, like, some of it, and it's really, it's fun to read. But that's the only, those are the ones that, like, I could think of that have caught my eye lately. Oh, that's hot. Oh. I don't really read books anymore, man. It's, well, I've done a couple of audiobooks, but I really can't sit down and read anymore just because I ruined multitasking is ruined books for me. It's ruined comics for me, actually. Um, I, because you, I can't, if you're reading a book or a comic, all you can do is just, it needs your undivided attention.

Otherwise, you're not paying attention to it. Yeah. So if you're, if you're, if you're, for comics and reading, it's like, I can passively read, you know, but like if I'm reading something that, like, if it's, if it's, if it's something that's like, how to explain it? Like, if it's any sort of literature. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, how do you passively read? Because like, if you, because, like, how to explain it. I can do something. something passive while I read.

There it goes better to say that, right? Like what? Like listening to music, I guess, or something? Like, it's like music is not, like, listen to music is not, like, I can put on music at any given time and it's shuffling stuff. I'm talking about progressing through a video game, progressing through a movie, like some other media. I can't do, you can do two.

No, no, you can't do those two things. You're not going to be able to absorb either one correctly because they both to your attention. That's why, like, I can't read books or that's, that's the only reason. I just, I need to be doing two things. because I'm so limited on time. So it's just not practical for me. Yeah, I know even do this one thing.

Audio books are amazing for that. Exactly. That's kind of how I've been reading most of it. Like, I read, uh, I had the, the Reggie Fisomey book that I got because, like, he was doing this weird, he was doing this weird circuit. We were talking about some bookie. I can't remember what it's called. I have it at home in New York.

I didn't bring it with me like a fucking idiot. But, uh, I was listening to it on audiobook and I was like, I was able to do all my other shit. I was able to, like, edit while I listened to it and do all this other stuff. And I was like, oh, this is great. But I'm trying not to do that because I want to be able to read again. And I feel like my focus is dwindling really hard because I've been so focused on doing everything at once. I don't know.

I still read regularly. Like, the last time I read was probably yesterday. Like, I read a bit every day. But, like, I read like, like, one of my... my favorite book. Like if there's literature in the book that I don't really understand, like, if it's like, there's some sort of like way or dialect of speaking that isn't natural to me, I have to do that alone because I'm like, I don't know what's going on exactly. Like in Dune, one of my favorite books is like a ton of like phrases and words. I just don't know what the fuck they mean. So I have to like read over that part over and over again and get context of who's about what it may mean. But there's like the, there's like the, there's like the long game. The Long Game by Mitch McConnell The Long Game Is that a real book?

Yeah It's just You know how to be a piece of shit You guys You guys have been on I mean Sweeney Well all of us We've traveled recently right

Yeah So we've been on planes Super super recently Do you I don't know where you guys were sitting But there are certain places On a plane where you can sit And there's almost like this

Over the wing specifically There's like this mechanical Kind of repeating sound before takeoff, it kind of sounds like a saw almost, or like a bunch of servos going back, you know what I mean? Yeah, it's like hydraulics. And every time I hear that sound, for some reason, ever since the first time I heard it, many, many years ago, all I can think of is the Twilight Zone, like when that creature's on the,

on the wing, but I look out on the wing and it's Mitch McConnell trying to saw the wing off. That is so fucking crazy. I don't, I, every time, I, I, I, yeah. Every time, like without fail, I've always thought about it. His neck is fucking, like, his neck is like just, just tearing through it. Like, it looks all slabby, but it's really strong. Exactly, yeah, he's trying to saw it through the wing. And then the reason why we take off is because he was, he's always unsuccessful.

It's like this little story that I have. He's on and he flies off. And the way he gets the ground, like he has to be dead, but then he gets right up. Yeah, he scurries away like a roach. He scurries away like a roach time. Hold on the doctor's top. He's Dr. Claude. But like, okay, back to books, though.

Of course, there's one of my favorites is... The Bible. Star Dust. Star Dust. Gay for pay is good, though. The Star Dust series is like one of a book of monks, like a bunch of other ones. Neal Game and whatever. Really great artists.

There's the City of Bones. Okay. There's obviously the Game of Thrones books. Sure. Do we? There's... I don't really... I only read fantasy and, like, fiction and like historical fiction.

Because, like, I, I don't like reading about the world I'm in because I live in that world. Like, reading about, like, I don't know, like, black Latino kids in the bronze. It's like, I was that. I don't want to read about that. I live that, you know? It sucks. You know, like, I don't want to read those stories, you know?

That's funny because I never read fantasy, ever. I, I, I, I, I... There's, like, very rare. Like, I'll read sci-fi sometimes, but even that's, like, very rare. Like, maybe, like, two books my entire life that I read. I can't do the whole... I read like, I read like books like about like, like real, like real things. Yeah, I read books about like people doing crazy shit or whatever.

Yeah. I read David Goggins. He has two books. And I usually, like, there's a lot of self-help people out there that I just, I hate because they're all trash. But he's such an extreme person that just reading his like life story, it's so compelling. And it may kind of kick you in the ass a little to be like, wow, I'm a pussy. But it's, it's just, this guy's like, it doesn't make it.

He doesn't make any sense. So I would say those are audio books, though, again. The last time I'm telling you the last time I've read anything physical with papers was, I'm talking about this is a long ago, was it was probably in succession, Sinestro Corps Wars, Blackest Night and Final Crisis. It was like that is success. It was like 14 years ago, dude. That was like a while ago.

It was before a new 52 or whatever. Blackest night came out when I was in middle school, dude. It was like 09 or something I was just going to high school Black is like I remember it came out And I begged my guy I would get it She was like no She told me no to my face

And I was like you're gonna go into nursing home one day And how long ago? When did you go to school? Black is night I started high school in 2008 So it might have been like I just got to high school I thought it was around that time But whatever it doesn't matter

It was a long time ago But that was the time I remember specifically like back to like glued. I'm already working because I'm already, I'm an adult and I'm like at my lunches glued to this shit, reading it on my lunches and stuff. And, uh, and then just reading the things and

do blackest night and Central World Corps was fucking lit it shit, bro. Dude, that all of that, that era before, uh, before New 52, that like end of it because that was the final crisis, obviously that was the end. That was some good ass fucking storytelling. Dude, sodom yacht fighting Superboy Prime, bro. Going at it. I cover Superboy Prime. Dude. Ah, good times, man.

I own all that shit and that's going to die Like I'm gonna when I die I'm gonna burn it so my kids can't sell it Fuck those kids Fuck those idiots They didn't pay for that shit Fuck them To me

Yeah I don't know I I did read one more recommend This is very specific And like I'm really really into Like comedy and like comedians And like the history of that stuff And like like like So like anything like George Carlin's books

Norm MacDonald has a great Has a great book That's just fucking absurd It's just, he just makes up a fake life for himself and it's hilarious. But there's a really interesting book called, I think it's Late Night, the War for Late Night. And it's by Bill Carter. It's like, it's the story about like Jay Leno and Conan fighting over like the Tonight Show and like the politics of it. It's fucking cool and like really, really interesting.

Because I think like especially like with comedians, it's really easy to forget that like these are people. and like because you always see you know you see their acting you're like wow that's amazing that they can do like a like this John Mullaney just put out a special today and it's actually really good but any book by a comedian is you talk about the whole cold thing oh yeah the whole thing was about and the whole thing was about rehab and just all that stuff and it's it's hilarious it's actually like it's better because he did what the fuck was it it was it was Oh my God. Kid Gorgeous. And then New in town. New in town was the first one. That was like really, really good. Kid gorgeous. I thought it was like eh. And then he did like some sack lunch bunch. I don't know what the fuck that thing was. But this one's like a like really, really good. I highly recommend it. But that's stand up. I don't know why I got into that. Hi. I'm John Mullaney. And I have the voice of an 18 year old boy.

I woke up one day and my reputation was different. Kanye going down. goofy Goofy mode wrote in he says Repost because it's just a banger question sup gay

hate the gay and gay and gay for green shooty space man as a turbo ultra virgin I love transformers

do you boys have any strong feelings about anything in said brand I personally mega horny for animated

and the Cybertron game the Cybertron games are really good actually I were way better I didn't

play them for I remember I remember playing them online and I'm not being way better than they had any right to be. Like way better. Not half bad at all. Yeah.

I was just like, what is this? This is a competent shooting game. I as a male brain you know, stooge, I like robots and just, I like things that are just roboty. I think it's just

you know, they, they, the marketing knows like just how primitive some men are. All you got to do is just put stupid metal together make them look like people. And then it attracts me to it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I love mobile suits and so.

There is a wave. People got into Gundams recently, and it's very bizarre to me. Like, people are fucking, like, just building them everything. The new series came out. Another new series came out, that's why. It's wild to me, and I'm like... Also, Zeros on Netflix now.

Oh, yeah. And so, but anyway, Transforms, I don't want to get, I don't want to get too far away from it. I, uh, I, like a lot of the series. I thought actually, even on Netflix, that Transformers Prime really fucking good.

It was way better than had any reason to be. I think there's a lot. I obviously grew up with, I loved Beast Wars, even though you're watching it back. It's not the best. It's not the best. It's fucking awful.

I was like, wow, man. It's pretty rough to watch. It's really sad. Like, when you revisit something and it doesn't hold up, that's like a horrible feeling.

Because your brain, Like when you're a kid Like particularly bad though Chris Like it's really bad But that's what I mean It's like because when you're a kid you like everything I remember specifically The first time

I walked out of something That I was really excited for And had the thought That I don't think I enjoyed that very much And it was Spider-Man 3 It was Spider-Man 3 That was the first time in my life that I remember being excited for something and it not living up to expectations.

I don't know if that's because I was a kid and that's just how the brain works at that age. I don't know if things just so happened to get really bad in general quality-wise around that time. But something was up. Something was up around that time. Especially because so many things were so like mega-hyped and met expectations around that time. like Bioshock fucking came out of nowhere Halo 3 was like the top of the fucking world Call of Duty like was like the best fucking

it had ever been and probably the best it's been since then and then all of a sudden 2007 here's Spider-Man 3 that thing that I've been excited for for years and it's just disappointing I love it now as an adult

You understand it as like a Sam Ramey piece of thing Right exactly Before I was like as as As just a Spider-Man person, it hurt me deeply. But then, like, when I grew up and I was like, oh, okay, so this is what movie-making is. And then honestly, like, that, there was a chickens-giving where we all got really, really high, and we watched Spider-Man 3. I don't remember which year this was.

This might have been 2019. It was the one that happened during COVID because we were all together at that time. Oh, so it was 2021 or 2020. No, no, no. It was 2020. I remember because I moved to New York the year after. I remember watching it really, really high and being like, if I, if, and for some reason, my brain was like, I'm going to watch this as if it's a soap opera, as if it's like bold, as if it's like all my children or something. And for some reason, it was amazing. Like as a soap opera, Spider-Man 3 is top tier. Like, it's like one of the, it's like, honestly, like an amazing movie.

But, great. I can watch them at any time, actually. It's something that. And I get it as a. kid you had a certain expectation what you wanted you wanted a standard superhero movie that I wanted a good venom and I wanted the yeah you wanted not Eric Foreman yeah right Tofer Grace I can't believe that shit till this day bro

That's it is one of the most bizarre In any superhero In any superhero film Ever that has been made That has to be the most bizarre casting choice No no Because Mick Mick and Chris are like In the universe

Because I think Tobie McGuire's not a good Spider-Man either. But I think in the Rameyverse, he fits the bucket perfectly. Like, for what Ramey wants Spider-Man to be, it's perfect. And I think in the Ramey universe where Peter Parker is Toby McGuire, Tofer Grace, fits well as a venom. Like, I think... I'll put it, I'll put it... You're misunderstanding what me and Mick were saying, I think, a little bit.

what we were saying was as far as the the Peter Parker that exists in those movies, right? Yeah. Pover Grace is a good Eddie Brock. There you go. Sorry, Eddie Brock. Yeah. His, that, that venom was horrible, though. Like, there's nothing good about that venom.

I do think, like, because he is, like, kind of like an opposite Peter, but he, he's, kind of like a doppelganger almost or like a nega version. Don't worry. It's the negatian. It's the negatian. No, but So I do think he works I just don't think they wrote the character correctly I don't think they directed him well

Ramey also said specifically That he doesn't know Venom He doesn't like Venom He doesn't care about Venom They made him Yeah, Ramee is a classic Spider-Man fan He is a Dittko And Lee Spider-Man fan

You can tell by the way those movies exist That is a fan of Stan Lee and Steve Didko He probably doesn't even know Venom came out He probably doesn't know who Hobgoblin is He did not know who Venom was. Straight out. Why it makes such a good Otto Octavius?

Otto's an ancient character. Otto's ancient. But what I mean is though, like, okay, okay. So he understands who he is. That is true. But they even, even the appearance was very respectable. Where it's like, wow, I believe this is Dr. Octopus just by looking at this. You know what makes it crazy?

I'll go one step further. I'll go one step further, right? Ramey's Dr. Octopus is the best version of Dr. Octopus. To the point that now, Doc Ack in everything that isn't comic-related, emulates that Doc Ack because of how well it was done. Right. Making him and Peter Parker colleagues is a perfect idea. Perfect.

It works so much well. It gives a character like a heart. It's not just some German dude. That's a dickhead with eight arms. Dude, just trying to fuck out May, you know. In the cartoon, fucking, uh, in the animated, yeah, in the, in the, yeah, in the, in the, in the, in the, in the, in the, in the, in the, in the, in the, in the series. So, yeah, I don't, I don't, I don't know my, anyway, yeah. Yeah.

He makes absolutely no sense in any way, shape, or form. Dude, the fact that he has the shoulder pad. So, so fucking buff. Why is he so goddamn jacked? Why is he's a fucking. He should be the, in all, in truth, he should be the opposite. Like, he should be, like, he's got his all these arms to do all the heavy lifting for him. Why does he need to be buff at all?

He should be, he should be incredibly unfit, actually. But was bigger than Peter Parker. Like, that's crazy. No, he's not. He's bigger than Spider-Man. He's not bigger than Peter Parker. You're right. Peter Parker is bigger than Spider-Man.

No, see, I'm saying, Eddie Brock is. bigger than Peter and that venom is just the wall I feel like I don't dude I got to pull up some auto act because Dr. Octopus is a massive

he's big but he's not bigger than Peter Peter Parker is bigger Peter Parker is bigger than Flash Thompson in that universe Derek Derek that's my favorite you know what it is it's those damn shoulder pads it's those same arm it is the shoulder the orange

shoulder pads the orange ones but he's has jacked arms like He's Brocky, bro. When the animated series first got put on Netflix, it was in 2012. Like, I remember it very vividly. Because I have a picture of me sitting down with the Rainbow Flow, which is Sprite and Rainbow Sherbert. And I take a picture in this Dr. Octopus on the big screen of where I'm watching on the TV. And he's just so fucking jacked.

And I'm just like, dude, he should be able to beat everyone. He should have no problems at all. Now, maybe I'm misremembering, but I just feel like I remember him being so. He is pretty buff. He is pretty buff. He is pretty buff, but you're forgetting how big Peter was. I think that's what it is. I think you're forgetting the size of Peter.

The reason, though, that he made an amazing green goblin and he made an amazing Dr. Octopus is because those are characters that he grew up with and cared about. Yeah. And he was able to train. He does not, he did not grow up with Venom at all. Venom was the 90s. Sam Ramee was well away from comic books by the time. Venom was even remotely a thing.

And I'm sure, I bet. Venom is like 80s, 90s. I think there's even, like, footage of him talking about, like, how, like, they approached him and to tell him to put Venom in. And he was like, who is that? Like, you know what's crazy? Sam Ramey could make a carnage that would make us have nightmares probably if he was given a chance.

He could have made a cool carnage. He could make a carnage that would make us be afraid to go to bed. It probably would have been, like, Matthew McConaughey or some shit. You know what I mean? I think he would have been Woody Harrison. I think he would have chose Woody Harrison. No, because that's who Woody. That's who he was now, wouldn't he?

Well, yeah, but Harrison didn't have a chance to go buck. Raymond, like, all right, you got to say the N-word. You got to say the N-word. You got to say the N-word. You got to be bad. He's just the-soked weed. You got to kick a baby in the face. You got to get the baby in the face.

All right, we're going to get real babies. Woody, you got to kick the baby in the face. I actually, you know what I think he would have actually done? I think he would have, I think it would have been Liam Neeson, actually. You know why? I'm thinking specifically because Ramee made those Darkman movies with Liam Neeson. You're right.

Ramey, and he has like a history with him. And I also think he probably could do that kind of well. I don't think he could easily. At that age, he was still probably too old. He was too much of a dad. You're right, yeah, maybe. But like. I'm trying to think of reasonable people that he would likely cast.

And I can't think of many. but I think Yeah, because he wanted to do the vulture. Young Campbell would have been a really good carnage. Yeah. Well, young, like Evil Dead. Evil Dead Cam would have been a good carnage. So you're going to see

You're going to see Evil Dead on Saturday, right? I'm going to see it Saturday, yeah. Tomorrow I'm going to do something for my birthday. I don't know what I'm going to do. But I figure it out. I'm 29 tomorrow. That's gross. Happy birthday, sweetie. Almost.

Damn, dude. the bitch-ass nigger shut bitch Hey yo Let's get one Yeah let's do it Oh wait Were we gonna say

Eric before? I was just gonna say I posted a clip Just There's a daily motion clip Of Dr. Octopus being probably

A third bigger than Spider-Man He's bigger than Spider-Man or Peter No He's definitely big He's definitely bigger than Spider-Man But I wish there was

A Peter Parker Him Aside by side, but it's just, he's so buff, it's, it's, it's, I can't probably, because it's not just the shoulder pads. He's fucking, like, his legs are, I'm jealous. He's, he's, it's in the chat.

Oh, there's a link in the chat. How could I be so irresponsible? Yo, watching the intro preview is Craig is so much that is happening. And I'm like, whoa, dude, that. Oh, oh, damn, I just found a picture of him next to a, Fuck! I just lost it. I just found a picture of him. He was right next to Peter Parker.

Fuck, man. I accidentally clicked out of it. Peter Parker. He always had that. He had that. Yeah, it is crazy how, like, because even the Spider-Man PS4, Dr. Octopus is, like, heavily.

They had their own, they had their own twists on it, for sure, but, like, it's heavily, heavily, based on, like, how. That's the best depiction of him, dude. Like, the idea, the simple idea of him being a colleague of Peter Parker's makes the character so much more enjoyable. It just does.

Because they have a connection, you know. There's actually a connection between him on his villains. Like that, that, I think I love that movie largely because of how, like, how good that relationship is between the two of them. And then Norman Osborne? Oh, my God.

Willow the foe is Norman? I got to bring something up real quick. So, so Dr. Octopus does not know Peter Parker is Spider-Man. Yet he's like, I need to talk to Peter Parker to get Spider-Man. Yeah. And he throws a car at him.

Yeah, he throws a car at him. No, he throws a car. Like, no, he would have killed him. Think about that scene. No, he would have killed him, absolutely. So, so what, like, what is that scene then? Well, the scene is this, right? Peter Parker takes the pictures of Spider-Man.

So is this like, oh, he knows Spider-Man? Yes, so why would you think? throw a car at him. Because it doesn't matter. He only got out of the way because he's Spider-Man. And he didn't know he's Spider-Man. You know, Derek, you know why he threw a car at him? Why?

Because it's a fucking cool shot. It's very cool. That is literally, like, there's a million, there's a million ways for that, for that interaction to make sense. And they're all less interesting than that shot. That's true. I think that's literally it.

Like, there's a lot of things about that movie. It's like, how does Dr. Octopus even get around without arousing suspicion with all those fucking arms? Like, how is he doing that? He's up. But at a certain point, it just becomes, it's like. But, like, you're not thinking about that because it's so fucking cool. Those arms, those kinds of those arms are still, like, that might be like my favorite design of, like, any, anything in a modern kind of superhero. movie. Like, I love the way they look.

I love the silver and, like, gold trimming of it and how they look kind of like rusty, but they're not. And they, they, they just, like, they move around, like, fucking snakes. And the, the lower ones have, like, bigger claws to, like, support weight and shit. It's fucking cool. Like, I love, his entire design is fucking awesome.

They killed. Yo, guys, I think, I think you're right. I just found a picture of them in front of each other. And I think Peter is bigger. I think Peter's bigger than Dr. Octopus. That is so ridiculous to see.

Peter Parker is so big. That's not even at his max size. You have to, you have to put this on screen when when you, I will. Because that is fucking absurd. Dr. Octopus is

bigger as Peter Parker. Dr. Octopus versus, versus Peter Parker, like normal civilian clothes Peter Parker in this screenshot looks like me versus William Haynes. Why is he that much bigger than him?

As Peter Parker, that shirt too. That that fucking polo that he wears makes me so angry. That's him at his max size. That's max size him. That's final form. That's 100% final form freeze Peter Parker.

Right, right. It's crazy how Peter's bigger is... What was freeze at her? best, his best, the gold freezer? Was it the gold freezer? Wait, there's, what? There's a black one. Whatever. Whatever.

Let's go to, let's end it. They're still going. Ended at the end of BBC. At the end of DBCZ is when it ends. Nah, dude. Ended at the end of Superman. On the last episode. Whatever, man. Anyway, we're.

Freezer can not see. Look, I got to, look, I got to go eat. I'm fucking hungry. I feel easy. Uh. So then next time. Yeah, tune in next time. I'm also going to, just to let you guys know, I'm going to contrast it.

There's pictures of Spider-Man, regular Spider-Man standing right next to Doctor Octopus. And Doc Octopus is way bigger than Spider-Man. I told you, dude. Peter is huge. He's huge. I love this so much. Peter Parker's bigger than Flash Thompson. And Flash Thompson, I would not bully that guy at all.

I would, when he came back after he got bit and he put on 4. 45 pounds, a muscle mass I would have never said shit to him, bro. Oh, my God. Let's, uh, all right. Uh, come on over to Patreon. Your Com slash Star Tank, uh, join us. Uh, we got a bunch of, uh, tears over there. Go figure it out for yourself.

I don't know. I'm not your mom. Uh, we're, I'm going to read off the, uh, $25 and up, uh, patrons now. So, uh, cut me down. Three, two, one, go. Max, silhouette. My name is Chris. Reagan and I hate the gays. Doc Jenkin and the

Tizim schism schism. Damn it Sweeney, how many times do I have to tell you to stop sending me news of your girlfriend when I'm reading the credits? Oh, I get it. It's a fun joke. What is that joke? I don't know. I don't have time. She Pipkin on my Pippa. Possum parentheses, yes, that's my real name. Barry

McCockiner. That's awesome. Piss in piss bed. Damo Nation. Average clit energy. Some bad news. Someone, oh, so some bad news. Someone bailed out Chris Chan. This isn't even a bit. It's just true. Star Coffee. Sweenie owes my friend Devon child support. I have a cute penis syndrome. My penis is not small, just cute. Staying hydrated to be ready to piss on Margaret Thatcher's grave at a moment's notice. Officer, you can't arrest me for a vehicular manslaughter. I was

listening to the Eurobeat version of the Freebird solo. Transfem Gremlin. Can Logan Paul abandoned a million pigs? My sexual awakening was the quirky goth girl from NCIS. Now my tasting women is ruined. Yush, Asker, the angelic dungeon master who would like to ask you what you'd like to do about the raiders that just entered the tavern. I really hope everybody with a long name in our audience dies. Can I say that? No.

I hope all of you die. We love you guys. I hope all of you die. I care about you. I love your support, but the rage that I feel when I read these long names is so insurmountable. It's wild. Rest in peace of the legendary Lance Red Dick, voice of cum. manders of Allah. Craig the Canadian. It's your boy, Shawnee D. Justice for Afro-Man. He needs his door

fix. Matt Walsh is a hero of our time. A hero of our time. Sweet Baby Gang for Life. Indie On YouTube. Red hot silly poppers. What's with these homies? This and my girl. God, I wish I were a modern Picasso painting, the creamiest, most beautiful, cubiest fur art. I don't know what this is. 3XO reminding you filthy fucks to look at your keyboard and realize how dirty you all are. Slurping, stroking, smoke, and joking. Ammonicons going like this. Stormboy's life. And What do you like? The average person has one fallopian tube. Call her Little Caesars the way her pussy hot and ready.

Drip M.H. The Lord of Drip. Nancy Pelosi killing a Palestinian with her massive chits. Obi-Won Chablommy. Loving women is gay. The fuck you kissing on cock-suckers for. Kremlin to Gremlin. Sweeney trading card game's first customer.

All's to wall. Okay, you said it right. Abby, something funny and topical. Gay snip-like be. Gay slip-not be like, come inside the penis and I. Hey, we got to do that one. That is so stupid.

We still got to do down with the dick. Oh, yeah. We got to do down with the dick. Things fell apart because of the clash. That's right. Wage slave 583. I feel gay. Fuck you.

I'm feeling a headache as I read these. The Papini Brothers Emporium presents the latest in cuck technology. Sneakovision. Good fight, Chris. Would that be amazing? Sneakovision? It'd be like a little, it'd be glasses. But every time you look at your girlfriend,

she's being fucked by some. random person. And when you take it off, it's like normal, but only when you're looking at your company. Somebody should invent that. I feel like it would sell really modestly, but to very specifically one person. She tubs something on my chumba wamba. I said we would lay off a sneako, but it's just too funny.

She tubs up in on my chumbabwamba. Darren some white man, culturally unaware snake the ever chosen. Fun fact, Maggie Baird voices Samara from Mass Effect. She's also Billy Ilish's mom. Have a nice day. Tell him Steve, I wouldn't be surprised if that's true. Honestly, everything this person has written in and said has been true. Uh, so that's, I, I believe you. Tell him Steve Dave, Andre Brooks, ah, limp biscuits and gravy. Timothy Oliphant was almost Dominic Tureto. John Strickland. I am announcing it right now. Our next parody is F-slurs in Paris.

Let's go. No, no, no, it's not. No, it's not. No, it's not. Verse 1889. I mean, that's not bad. I mean, that's fine. I was supposed to.

Wish my girlfriend took it as gracefully as Chris makes right hooks. The first church of Keith David, I don't always agree with Chris, but duck, now that's some S-tier meat. Good, you have good taste. I ran over my 2003 Silverado. That really threw me

off. I ran over my 2003 Silverado with my voodoo blue 2020 Toyota Tacoma. Pre-Raz. Blake 896. Church of getting kicked in the face by Cammy. Amen. They made her so thick in six, bro. They did work on her. And Chunley Chesley. Do you see Tundley in six, bro?

I mean, Chunley will always be a winner. Nah, dude. People would boycott if they fucked her up, you know, so. Bro, they made her. They made her mother material, bro. And for the age. Alaskan oil field trashed, Stu Hulk,

tickle my ass hairs, Nikki Ziggy, Dom's, uh, Dom's alternate ending to Gears 3 where after blowing himself off, he regains consciousness to the words, hey,

you're finally awake. Lobotomized Jesus can't wait to lick on, you imagine being in that type of dire scenario, finally getting out and then just being thrown into something else. Yeah, to fucking pambeo. Oh, fuck. You know how much Pomerdale sucks, bro?

They've got wolves on the middle of the road that'll bite you and your bones will turn the stone. Dude, like, what the fuck is going on? They got trolls that hit you across football fields. There's fucking giant crabs. Dude, I don't think I know a single person that could kill a mud crab. I don't think I know one guy that'd be able to kill a mud crab for the game after that. No. Like that world

I mean, think about the fucking Most most Most worlds that are video games You would not want to live in Like if I woke up in the lands between I can't even tell you I would start crying How quickly I would kill myself

I'd be out of there so quick Jesus Christ I would try to get one of the black assassins knives And I would hopefully kill I'd become a servant of somebody Kill them take their souls and hopefully Lobotomize Jesus

Can't wait Lobotomize Jesus Can't wait to lick on Hulk Hogan's sloppy wet fat fucking pussy Like a dog in a water bowl That's right brother The sounds The sounds of mommy and daddy

Fighting downstairs But it's drowned out by Derek and Sweeney's slang argument Randy McNally is ready to McNally and a hoes bussy from Tennessee Jackson Dupont Badly Brave hugger Derek To the rhythm of Bulls on parade Come on command

So stupid Aetherian Pergerian hunter Melfus won hex blak Hexblade Warlock Hexblade supremacist Back from being Bomber Chan For another person

Patreon read And rounding out our list As always You know You know the guy I'm not even gonna say His soul explodes Suckin on this pole

My penis explodes You want another low Or chuppet Put your mouth on my balls It's with that cum shot The shorter for your mouth With that cum shone shot.

With the cup. That's good. That's fucking perfect. Dick in my balls. All right. Obviously, we're talking about King of Hapazard. Thank you. I'm sorry you had to listen to that.

With that cum shot. Sure, that make that penis giving lots of handies. And a pocket full of cum. It's so dumb. All right. All right. We got to go.

We got to fucking. All right. Thanks for fucking thanks. Thanks, I guess. bough wow we should that's how we should do it we shouldn't even have to get the instrumental yeah all right we're leaving bye we're leaving we're leaving we're well a voire yeah people would really like that cover That is the pound, the pound.

They hate that, I'm James.