The Snark Tank - #172: I WANT TO BELIEVE

Episode Date: September 18, 2023

BG3, Mexican Aliens and Chicken BLT

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Use your thune. You are Dova, killer of niggas. I did everything right. I did everything right. And they locked me in the sarcophagus with the night mother. I don't know what I've done. I tell you, I've served the Dark Brotherhood for years.

Dude, I would love to fight Cicero in real life. I would love the no weapons, no nothing, this me versus Cicero. One person leaves the room alive. I forgot about Cicero. I'll take the, if he kills, which you probably will, I'll take the kill. But if I kill Cicero, I would be in light. A glowing being would come out of the room after I killed him. You know, what's really crazy about Skyrim to me is that, like, Skyrim, I played this shit out of Skyrim on 360 in 2011.

You know what I mean? Like, when it came out. I must have put, like, fucking 80 hours in. into it. And then I just sort of stopped and then I lost that character. And by the time the remake came out, or not remake, but like the remaster, Skyrim, like, Ultimate Edition came out in 2016 or whatever. I couldn't bring myself to play it because I still remembered a lot about, like, my

original character. Like, I remembered the blades that I had. I remembered, like, the mask and the armor that I had. So I never really, I didn't get into it then. At this point, I think I've forgotten enough about it. I forgot who the fuck Cicero was even entirely. So I probably could replay Skyrim and actually enjoy it. I can't.

I guess this is gone. It's out of my memory entirely. I can't. I remember that game way too well. Like way too well. I remember the first two hours that I came really, really well. I like, like the first two hours of that came, you're finally, yeah, like the, the, what is it, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the meme to death carriage intro and then, and then, and then, and then, uh, going up to that keep where, like, there's that one guy with his treasure box

and that really thin tower that's like half dilapidated. I just remember it like really, really vividly. But everything after that's gone. Like I don't remember fucking anything. Well, it's time. I remember killing that first dragon and it's so difficult. You should just finally just, now see like me and my friend,

we would fucking just grind to her O.P. And then we can like just whoop anyone's ass like so easily. Like my friend like on 360, he fucking nothing no gauntless nothing he punched a fucking I'll do into death he is fucking he is punched under death

clobbering that's so cool clobbering him denting in his skills so ridiculous yeah yeah they're just they're so I've put like 75 hours in the Starfield already

and like I think once I'm done with it I think I might go back to I think I might try Skyrim again you definitely should I might work I might work my way back like backwards because I I never, I never played, oh, I played fall three kind of recently, actually. Okay.

But, but I want to play, I've never played oblivion. Don't do it. No. It's fun. Oblivion's a fun game, but it's very old. You're not, you Chris Reagan are not going to enjoy it. Listen, keep in mind that I went back to fucking Cotor and liked it. That is true.

And only stopped because I run into a bug that broke the game entirely. Well, you're talking about Oblivion, so prepare for a lot of bugs that will stop the game, period. Oblivion is full of that. I got, I got like a couple hours into oblivion, and then I was actually like, I'm not sure what I was supposed to do. And that actually got a little, like, that threw me off. Or I was like, wait, I'm actually not one-hundred, like, I'm going in my, the index or whatever, and I'm like, what am I? And then I just kind of turned it off. I was like, all right.

I love the idea of you being defeated by just sheer confusion I'm like wait a minute I could have spent a little bit more time just thinking but I didn't want to because it's not a new fucking game Yeah really really really put that It really put that into perspective though About like the world that your character lives in Like your character is like the hero of this world

And then like everybody They just disappears because he just got too confused He's just gone It's like what happened to the hero of What happened to the hero of fucking wherever this place is? These demons are gonna fuck everyone in the eyes now. It's like he got fucking confused and fucked off. It's insane.

Oblivion's the world of Oblivion is so much worse too. Because it's so brutal because you're literally fighting your daydra everywhere. So like imagine the hero just leaving. I don't know. I might or might not. I own it. Like I have it. Yeah, right.

Pop it on whenever I want. Same thing with Marowin, it's like, okay. I have it, but there's no way. There's, there's no chance in hell. Like, Marowind is too far. Like, that's like, no way, no chance in hell am I going back to Marrown? What the fuck is playing Morowind in 2020? Some, dude, I know people, I know people who fucking swear.

I know people who fucking swear by Moro Wind, and it's like, what men? That is the most, like, nostalgia lends ever. Ever when people say, man, it still holds up. I'm like, you're fucking lying. You're, you're so lying. I get like something It's like going back and playing Like going back and playing

Cotaur you can have some fun with it But if you were to say that Oh this shit still holds up as far as like the mechanics and everything You're just lying You can just say oh it's a good story Great story It is yeah It's kind of like fucking playing Baldur's Gate

We're seeing the the You and other people talk about the combat Where they're like it's it's too hard for them to Not hard but it's It's too much for them to get into But the other aspects of it are great Yeah, yeah. I told, it's like, yeah, I get it.

I mean, Couture and Baldur's Gate combat are sort of, sort of, no, no, that's original. I mean, because the combat in Cotor is just like Dragon Age. Yeah. As original Borders game, Cotor, no, Cotor is like, because Cotor, the way you build your character is exactly the same as Baldur's Gay, because that's because of Blders Gay, because of Balthus Gat. Yeah. Because of D&D's old, no, Coutor is the old, um, SR files that D&D, you. use have. Right, yeah.

The only difference is in Co-turn, you're not waiting for 40 minutes while 40 goblins take a really slow turn walking towards you. No, you're just swinging and clashing swords for 25 minutes. And then you're like, up, I hit him for six damage. I had it for six damage. That's still half the time. You're still waiting. You're like it.

I still, I don't know. There's something about it that I just like it. Where you just shoot your gun at nothing, I can go and go take a piss real quick. I'm like, ah, shit, I'll just set my fucking, I'll just set, I'll set the stage. And then fucking, and then I'll just go take a. piss and then, you know, and then come back and nothing's happened. You're like, oh, sick. No, sometimes

you, sometimes you fuck up and you get killed because you were too arrogant, or like, I got this. It really is that advantage system, man. That advantage system, like, really, I just I get it's part of D&D, but like I really fight. I hate it.

It's super simple, but you have, if you don't pay Dunnages and Dragons, I understand it can confuse you. For me, it's really, it's confusing. It's just that it's, it's, it's like, annoying. to do because like when I play like a turn base game I can understand turn base games like that's entirely fine like I've played tactics games and all sorts of shit where it's like okay you're turn my turn my turn no no it's not it's not the same because you have to you have to be even more strategic words like do you want to sacrifice your entire turn for moving or setting something up or

versus a regular traditional turn base game you're just doing moves well you already well you set things up in tactics games no in in tactics games you do you do set things up, but the difference is, like, there's no weird arbitrary advantage system that's deciding at some random level who on your team decides to go and who doesn't. Well, that's just all about the rule. Yeah. That's about the initiative. That's about the R&G. Right, but that's what I'm talking about. That's what I'm talking about. It's initiative. It's all D&D stuff. And I'm like, ah, I don't know. This is this. It's, it's really, it's, I mean, I get into a, it's super simple. When I, when I get, it's not about it being simple. It's about it

being like, like, like, the worst. It would be like if in chess, like, I could go twice and then you could go four times, but then the next time, it's different. It's like, why? What are you doing? Pieces have certain things. This is so dumb. It's like in chess how a rook can move across a battle. Hello, hello. I'm Malcolm Gladwell, host of Smart Talks with IBM. I recently spoke with IBM's new director of research, Jake Mbata. We discussed his vision for the future of quantum computing. At IBM research, what we always do is answer what is the future of computing, whether it's coming up with new algorithms, coming up with better AI, coming up with quantum, or coming up with just how do different accelerators go together? It's our DNA to answer the question of what is the future.

Isn't it a perfect problem for IBM because you kind of need to have a legacy of building stuff? Yes. Building actual physical machines. Yeah, it's why I came to IBM. I wanted the experience, the culture of building hard things that. others have not done before. Where do you imagine we are in the timeline of this technology? There will come a point when it will mature. Right?

Yeah. My cell phone is a mature technology at this point. How far are we from that point with Conton? By 2029, we'll build the first fault-tolerant quantum computer. That is one that can run a very, very large, large problem. To learn how IBM is building the future of computing, visit IBM.com Quantum. All right, quick quiz for the hiring managers out there.

What's worse? Being understaffed or being poorly staffed? Well, that's a trick question, because both are recipes for chaos. Either way, just say to yourself, this is a job for Indeed's sponsored jobs. You'll get matched with candidates that meet the skills, certifications, and everything else you're looking for. Or go a different way and get no traction. Seriously, sponsored jobs posted directly on Indeed are 95% more likely to report a hire than non-sponsored jobs. It really is a no-brainer. Spend less time searching and more time

actually interviewing candidates who check all your boxes. Less stress, less time, more results. When you need the right person to cut through the chaos, this is a job for Indeed's sponsored jobs. And listeners of this show will get a $75 sponsored job credit to help your job get the premium status it deserves at Indeed.com slash podcast. Just go to Indeed.com slash podcast right now. Indeed.com slash podcast. Terms and conditions apply. Need to hire? This is a job for indeed sponsored jobs. And a pod can't. Things do different things. No, no, no, no, because in Baldersgate, the rook moves differently every single time. No. Everyone has different things. Depending on what it's fighting. No, depending on what it's fighting. What happens in D. in Baldersgate, right? Because it's

literally the same as then as a Dragon Spy v. What happens is certain classes have abilities to move further and faster than others. The rogue, the rogue. Right. The. The Ranger and a barbarian are the ones that can do that. They're the ones that can always do shit like that. Advantage, it varies. Like, advantage, if someone's knocked down, certain people, like, if you have a wolf on your team, the wolf gets advantage

if one of your people's near it. All it takes is just reading. The thing that's confusing is, like, the hit in my ratio, it must be like, air quotes real life where, like, no matter how good you are swinging a sword, something could happen you can fuck up. That shit's annoying as fuck, I get it. It's really, particularly in the beginning

levels, that shit's infuriated. Towards the time when you get to act two, I don't really miss attacks anymore. I kind of just always hit people, and I always do fuck shit to them after I hit them. I had this arrow that pulls people off of high ledges, so I shot this arrow at some guy. The guy hit another guy, and they both fell off the ledge and died. And I was like, damn, I didn't even set that up. That was just bullshit. But it's just reading.

It's just like, oh, well, this does this now. It's not about reading. I just don't like getting into a combat thing, and then Shadowheart can go, and then, like, 15 enemies can go and then my other two guys can go. It's like, no, I don't, I don't respect this at all. I hate this design entirely. I do like say the R&Gs that I play when you, when you're, it's like knowing the and like what I was referring to before that like, you kind of know what you're getting yourself into with, if you know the game enough, like say for example, a term base that I play, you know exactly

where your speeds are. And then so you know which order your people are going in, every single time and there's nothing ever different. I don't mind there being, like, what you guys I understand. I personally don't mind that. What I'm talking about is in a traditional like you said, you're setting things up. You can skip turns, but you can always just attack,

defend, whatever it is. Sometimes, depending on how far the enemy is, you may just only need to sacrifice your turn by advancing. And that's the major difference between a traditional RPG and that, where you are already at the battle,

The battle has commenced. You're already there. There's no traveling. There's no traversing. There's just the combat. That's the thing that were, especially sometimes environment. Do you guys, spoiler for Sweetie, did you rescue? Did you rescue, oh, my, Ravenguard or whatever the name is?

Not yet. I don't know what this fight looks like, though. I haven't gotten there yet. Oh, like, well, there's just where, you know, it's just when you're racing against environments, that shit annoys the fuck out of me. You know, you know, in Act 1 with the, uh, with the,

Giv Yankee crush? Yeah. Spoiler alert. Where, where, we're, that part. Yeah, what are we doing? That's running and you have to like, get out of the building before it falls. Right, right.

Is like, it's annoying. He's like, oh, my character's not going. For some reason, my main character, who is a Ranger fucking rogue was not going. And I was like, yo, this is really bad. Because he's the, I could dash, move it, like,

triple everybody else's speed, but I just couldn't move. Let's just say this. Can you set up... Can you set up Overwatch in Ballers Gate? Probably. Yeah, I think so. What do you mean, probably? Probably.

No, do you understand what I mean by that? Like, I'm not saying, like, the game. I'm saying, like, the mechanic. The tactic. Like, I don't see why not. I haven't seen it in any of my characters at all. What do you mean? That blew my mind.

I was like, where's Overwatch? What do you mean by that? So, Overwatch, in a tactics environment, which is kind of what Baldersgate tries to be, or I think probably succeeds at in a lot of ways, in its combat anyway, is a tactics-based game, in the sense that it's like, it's like isometric, it's like turn-based and all that stuff. Overwatch is you set up a character to kind of have this cone of attack for a certain distance so that when other enemies cross it, they kind of automatically launch into an attack mode. So you pretty much have the

like opportunity of attack like if someone there's an opportunity of attack you. There's an opportunity of attack it. If someone passes a certain ring, like range, let's say if you have like a grave or a sword you hit them as they come right. Or if you have like an arrow or if you have like an arrow and like you have, you set up, you set up, you set up a guy you set up a guy to like look what to look after a corridor

and if an enemy goes in. That's crazy that. It doesn't have that. In the way that you kind of do that is like say there are some stationary not stationary. That's the wrong thing I'm saying. There are things like your wall of fire or you're something where if they're in a specific threshold that they're going to get damaged

or like say there's the fireball that you can have in a certain vicinity so then when it's if somebody's around there then you go and fuck them up with it or something that ball that's on fire not the actual fire I don't know how you call it. The flaming spear there you go like so there's things like that I would say but not to

perfectly the only time is if you if you cross somebody from behind and then they try to just you know take a swipe at you because like I don't know if you've ever advanced if you've ever tried to move backwards when you were in front of somebody then they'll immediately try to take a swipe at you

this red era yeah yeah yeah yeah this is not spoiler but like dude this is escaping something like we're talking environmental escaping or something and there are other people that are actually on your you're

they're helping you or they're like kind of neutral or whatever and they're just stupid and I'm like I need them to climb this ladder so we can escape and then motherfuckers like won't do it and I've uh I don't know if you've had I've restarted the game like I've I've saved like the adventure and I'm like you stupid bitch you wasted a fucking turn and then I had to restart it so I wouldn't waste a turn the fact there's only problem I have a problem I have with the bumbers game for this is like my own only actual gripe with it for real. When you have to save characters that you can't control in that game, it is the worst thing ever. That is the only time I'm like, this game is stupid. This is fucking dumb.

I hate this motherfucker. Why would you run toward the harpies? Why? You're a little boy. You can't fight them. And then that's it. Yeah, that's the only...

That's cool. I want my second play-through, and I'm doing some very different things. And it's cool, man, but I will say there are some things that I wish there are too, it's too, like, it's reminded me of, like, damn, it's still too canonical. Or there's something that I can't do because this needs to lead somewhere. And it kind of upsets me. I'm like, damn, I'm hoping, I want to do, I love when you can go somewhere in like Dark Souls where you clearly shouldn't be there. But if you're good enough, you can survive.

And that's what I'm kind of trying to do. You can skip pretty far ahead. You can, you can like skip all the time. I'm trying. Well, this isn't, well, yeah, well, yeah, we're getting whatever. We got a lot to, look, listen, Paul does gay is gay. Okay. If we're talking about Starfield, you'd go on for a while, huh?

No, no, no, I would not want to talk about Starfield, actually. How dare you? What I want to talk about is these fucking Mexican aliens. I want to talk about these fucking Mexican aliens, right? Because Sweeney hasn't seen this. Sweeney somehow avoided. the entire fucking conversation about these Mexican aliens

I don't even understand how How sick were you? I was pretty sick I wasn't on the internet You weren't even on Twitter like scrolling through looking at these Mexican aliens Dude I kind of

I kind of want to delete my Twitter man Except for me being very honest I really don't like this app at all At all slightly I don't want to have it anymore I got locked out of my account this morning Who did you tell to Die So what happened was

So this is real right? Right? So I changed my... So I subscribed to Twitter Blue for like one month exactly because I wanted to post like a really, really long video on Twitter. And that's the only way you can do it. I was like, you know what, at $11, it's fine, whatever. And then I canceled the renew thing or whatever. But I'm like a verified account right now. And so I changed my profile picture to the B movie me from like my most recent thumbnail.

And just for a joke because like somebody was like, how many likes for you to do? change this to your thumbnail or your profile picture. I was like, no problem, bro. And I did it. And then I was only going to do it for a day. And then I went to go switch it back, and it was like, you can't do that. And I was like, what? So I'm stuck as, I'm stuck as this bee, this fucking, this disgusting bee. Because apparently, what is it?

Hello, hello. I'm Malcolm Gladwell, host of Smart Talks with IBM. I recently spoke with IBM's new director of research, Jake Gambata. We discussed his vision for the. future of quantum computing. At IBM research, what we always do is answer what is the future of computing, whether it's coming up with new algorithms, coming up with better AI, coming up with quantum, or coming up with just how do different accelerators go together. It's our DNA to answer the question of what is the future. Isn't it a perfect problem for IBM because you kind of need to have a legacy of building stuff? Yes. Building actual physical machines. Yeah. It's

That's why I came to IBM. I wanted the experience, the culture of building hard things that others have not done before. Where do you imagine we are in the timeline of this technology? There will come a point when it will mature. Right? My cell phone is a mature technology at this point. How far are we from that point with Conta? By 2029, we'll build the first Volt-tolerant quantum computer.

That is one that can run a very, very large, large problem. To learn how IBM is building the future of computing, visit IBM.com slash quantum. All right, quick quiz for the hiring managers out there. What's worse? Being understaffed or being poorly staffed? Well, that's a trick question, because both are recipes for chaos. Either way, just say to yourself, this is a job for indeed sponsored jobs. You'll get matched with candidates that meet the skills, certifications, and

everything else you're looking for. Or go a different way and get no traction. Seriously, sponsored jobs posted directly on Indeed are 95% more likely to report a hire than non-sponsored jobs. It really is a no-brainer. Spend less time searching and more time actually interviewing candidates who check all your boxes. Less stress, less time, more results. When you need the right person to cut through the chaos, this is a job for Indeed sponsored jobs. And listeners of this show will get a $75 sponsored job credit to help you. your job get the premium status it deserves at indeed.com slash podcast. Just go to indeed.com slash podcast right now.

Indeed.com slash podcast. Terms and conditions apply. Need to hire? This is a job for Indeed's sponsored jobs. Yeah. Your profile is under review. No new changes are allowed to name and profile photo during the review period. So that's something that happens with, I guess, checkmarks in general.

It's why check marks always have the same profile picture or had the same profile picture for a long because if you change your profile picture, you would lose your verification mark, which is crazy, because that's just less functionality for the fucking app. That's weird. I thought it was only if you changed the name.

I don't know it was the fucking picture. No, the picture, too. That's stupid as fuck. Yeah, so I didn't know that. So I'm suck as to be, but whatever. But so because I changed my picture under the verification,

they were like, we're going to look up, uh, you know, we're going to, we're going to put this guy under review. So they found like three tweets of mine where I just told people to kill themselves from like

20, thing or whatever. You know what's funny though? And it was all, it was all friends of mine. It was all like Jeff. I would be like, Jeff, kill yourself. Or something like that. And it's like, that's so fucking silly.

But whatever, I don't care. Stupid-ass fucking stupid. But I'm glad that we got to see those dried out Mexican aliens that got the fucking semen drained out of them. Yeah, that was pretty cool. What I did like about that is seeing, there are some pretty prominent people that I follow that were like on the fence like oh is this what do you guys think that's so crazy and I'm like why do you the more followers you get just the more retarded you become I don't get it

like what does that happen it's it's the fakes fucking thing I've ever seen especially if you know so I tweeted this out that uh when I would go over my friend Jesus house we every once in while he would just turn on the Mexican news going to be some crazy shit happening and every once in a while, maybe like a couple of times a year or something, some Mexican authorities, some type of people would have these press conferences about aliens and it was as normal as

watching, there was a Mexican Jerry Springer named Jose Luis. And it was just as normal as that, just seeing some dumb shit like, oh, oh, that's funny. They were talking about thunderbirds. They found some fucking thunderbirds, like some giant fucking archaic birds. And I'm like, this is, I was like, Mexico

fucking rules. And I just thought that like people knew about this silly shit that goes on over there, but... Latin American news. Bro, it's horrible. It's horrible. It's fucking great, though. It's, it's racist.

It's belligerent. It's nonsensical. Bro, watching the news, my grandmother, my grandmother never watched novellas. Is that for one? She watched one novell and I was like, all my children, but it was Spanish, all my children. He was like, I was watching it since I was in Puerto Rico. So, like, I have to still watch this. And she never watched the news.

She never watched any of the top of the shows. She was like, it's always full of ignorance. And I can't stand it. And I'm like, damn. But I would watch it. It always be some big ass bitch showing the weather. And I'd be like, I have to watch this. Grandma.

I'm sorry. I don't know what she's saying. They were, they were fucking. They were so good at that shit. I was like, man, I don't know why. But the weather, I just really like learning about it. I really care. I really care about the weather in Honduras, bro.

I don't know why I really care with weather than Honduras and Tamaga. They would have fucking West T-shirts contest on the fucking weather channel. It makes no fucking sense. Bro, they would have the largest butts ever. And I would just be sitting there happily. My grandma would be like, turn that off. It was crazy because it was pre-Brazilian butt lift era, man. Pre-BBL.

Yeah. It was all. When you didn't have to worry about it if it was real or not, you just knew it was real, bro. That's a time, bro. We lived before that. Isn't that crazy? I feel blessed, man When I think about all the shit that we grew up with

We lived before that period But we never lived in a period without fake tits That's I think is the sad thing That is true That is true That is like we miss that entirely Imagine Like imagine

Like imagine like a big titty Like Scottish Like princess In like 17 hunts You know what I mean? Like that's like There's no doubt You know what I mean

Either that or it's or Or, like, maybe people thought, like, is that, is this magic? Yeah, yeah. But, like, if they're a stupid. She's a witch. Yeah, yeah. They drowned her. That's a real thing.

People thought women were witches because they were just hot. Yeah, like, that's like a real thing. People were vexed, man, at their beauty. Because everyone else is, like, fucking goblins. And they're like, oh. She's too attractive. Tie an an anvil to her legs and throw her in the lake. That's bananas.

There's always just some jealous-ass bitches. Like, I. she be, she bewitched me. Oh, like, they'll poison their husbands and be like, oh, it was her. And like the fucking hot bitch is whining her business. That was great stuff, man. Crazy, crazy, crazy time. I feel like didn't the Salem Witch Rouse start that way in some way?

It was like some dumb bitches fucking around. They were making a joke and then everybody took seriously. They were using medicine. They're using like herbal medicine because they thought they were like, they were like, they were like, some sort of like polyphistic people. There's a girl named Abigail Williams, I think, was faking sickness or something and saying, it was something. Man, I wish I remember this. You know, first and last names.

I'm not even close to education on this. Well, I, man, do history, I love history because of how fucking stupid people are, you know, throughout history. History is lit because you find out how stupid people are and how smart some people were and they had no business being that smart at that time. But it's always significantly. outweighed by the stupid. Like, it's always like trounced by like, there's like this many smart people and they're like this many fucking morons.

Just run around with rocks and sticks, bro. Think about how celebrated a lot of torture that had to do with witches. The stuff that the medieval go over into Europe and then they brought a little bit over it to the Americas. And it kind of brings me to, I'm sure you guys saw that

super villain Australian guy with the not five, not five head. He has like a ten head. He has like his, his forehead is so big. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. The guy who's talking, the guy who was talking about how, like,

we need to inject more pain and suffering into the workforce. Wait, did you see that one, Sweeney? Wait, no, I haven't. You didn't see this fucking supervillain, this guy that was like an actual villain? There's this Australian, like,

fucking businessman who's like, he's giving, like, I don't even know if it was, it wasn't a TED talk exactly, but it was like, he was on some kind of panel talking to, like, I guess,

business insiders or something, and he was talking about how like, yeah, we need unemployment to be like 50%. We need to cause a lot of pain in the economy so that we can get back to normal. A lot of people think they're lucky. A lot of people think employers are lucky to have employees, and it's the other way around. We've got to kill every last woman and child on this guy's green ass. He's trying to get his shit off, bro. Like, it's fucking really crazy.

Like, he might as well have, like, a boomerang safe behind. him. That's crazy. It is the most outrageous fucking I was like, the fact that someone is comfortable enough saying that to a group full of people means that it's getting too people are getting too comfortable. Like that guy should be, that guy should be deathly afraid to say that stuff. Like he should be.

In like a just world, he would be terrified to say that shit. Exactly. That's why I was saying about the torture. That's what like bring. Maybe we need to bring back some of this shit to just like when you say. the gallo was it a gallo was it a gallo or a guillotine that was pushed the guillotine dude in porto when they when they wheeled the guillotine up to the fucking governors off mansion whatever the fuck do that's so hard for look with the steps and everything that's the

whole gallo the guillotine's just the head chopped thing yeah you can just yeah wheel the the guillotine over that see that's that's awesome and and immediately with that guy saying that being so brazen because we all know that they're thinking that shit I know there was that guy the same thing with the strikes it was the writer strike for and then one of the dickhead said something similar that, oh, we just need to starve them out and wait till they get kicked out of their homes and shit, and then they'll pave kind of a thing. And I just keep thinking the same thing. Like, why are we not drawing and quartering these people?

We should tie, in Australia, what they should do is they should tie each one of his limbs to a separate kangaroo. And just fray. They all jump in unison. And then whip the kangaroo so they all start running away. And they tear them in half. Imagine they fucking, just the force of their. jump would just rip him to shreds, dude. Dude, that's so fucking sick.

What they should do, they should tie him to a post, put kangaroo nip on him. Hello, hello, I'm Malcolm Gladwell, host of Smart Talks with IBM. I recently spoke with IBM's new director of research, Jake Embatta. We discussed his vision for the future of quantum computing. At IBM research, what we always do is answer what is the future of computing, whether it's coming up with new algorithms, coming up. with better AI, coming up with quantum, or coming up with just how do different accelerators go together. It's our DNA to answer the question of what is the future.

Isn't it a perfect problem for IBM because you kind of need to have a legacy of building stuff? Yes. Building actual physical machines. Yeah, it's why I came to IBM. I wanted the experience, the culture of building hard things that others have not done before. Where do you imagine we are in the timeline of this technology? There will come a point when it will mature. Right?

My cell phone is a mature technology at this point. How far are we from that point with Kondo? By 2029, we'll build the first fault-tolerant quantum computer. That is one that can run a very, very large, large problem. To learn how IBM is building the future of computing, visit IBM.com slash quantum. All right, quick quiz for the hiring managers out there.

What's worse? Being understaffed or being poorly staffed? Well, that's a trick question because both are recipes for chaos. Either way, just say to yourself, this is a job for indeed sponsored jobs. You'll get matched with candidates that meet the skills, certifications,

and everything else you're looking for. Or go a different way and get no traction. Seriously, sponsored jobs posted directly, on Indeed are 95% more likely to report a higher than non-sponsored jobs. It really is a no-brainer. Spend less time searching and more time actually interviewing candidates who check all your boxes. Less stress, less time, more results. When you need the right person to cut through the chaos, this is a job for Indeed's sponsored jobs. And listeners of this show will get a $75-sponsored job

credit to help your job get the premium status it deserves at Indeed.com slash podcast. Just go to Indeed.com slash podcast right now. Indeed.com slash podcast. Terms and conditions apply. Need to hire? This is a job for Indeed's sponsored jobs. So they come in and they can kick him. Kangaroo.

They kick him against the stump. He's on the stump and they're kicking him flat. What's funny? What's really funny about the concept of something like kangaroo nip in the sense that of like this highly addictive drug specifically for kangaroos is that kangaroos are built in a way that's human enough to imagine them doing this. You know, where they're like scratching their neck

and they're like, oh, man, I'm fiending, man. The idea, I don't know. The idea that kangaroos exist is disgusting. There's like an off, there's like rabbits that had to evolve and talk to them all people. I can't remember. I think that's disgusting. I can't remember who I was talking to about this, but if you were, if you lived,

if you were the first person to, if you were the first person to, to come in contact with a kangaroo, you would probably think. think a demon was was chasing you or something like that that is not like a natural looking thing at all it definitely looks like something that australia everything white didn't if if if the if the environment was a little bit different australia um maybe they would have been the first like actual like technical technical homo sapiens or something because it looks like they were they were they're just big upright they're not it's just weird because everything over there looks ridiculous.

Like everything over there looks absurd. Their arms are so fucking like just they're like ripped human arms and it's a regiment that they're on makes no sense. You know? They look. What are they?

Because what are they lifting? That's the thing. It's like like kangaroos strain, they're all in their legs. They're hopping around. They're kicking things to death. What are they doing that's making their arms so fucking strong?

Yeah. What is the evolutionary benefit for them? They're just defined. They are strong, man. They're not crazy strong like their legs. Did you see that kangaroo? It's a classic video of the kangaroo putting the dog in the fucking headlock. Yeah, that's a dog, bro.

I understand it's a dog, but that's still, the fact, first of all, the fact that it understands how to do that. It's hilarious. It's insane. Other things are to do that. I love some dogs grab. No, cats and dogs don't put other animals in headlocks. Yeah, because they don't have the arms, their arms don't bend like that. Dude, even, I don't even think, I honestly.

Honestly, I don't even think I've seen a monkey do that. Like, I swear to you. Like, I have never seen a monkey put another smaller monkey in headlock and slamming on the floor. I've seen monkeys pick up rocks. I've seen monkeys. And I'm like, damn, this is it. Yeah, that's true. That's, that's easy.

I've seen, I've seen chimpanzees toss another chimpanzee up really high in the air as like, as like a bullying ritual. I've seen that shit. And that's also disheartening and, uh, scary. But I don't know, man. Something about a kangaroo because I can't relate to a kangaroo. I've seen apes fight in one ape was. like fishing for something to grab and grabbed the rock and pung the other one with it.

And I was like, yo. Yeah, that was desperation. Desperation led to innovation. That's crazy. I mean, that's, yeah. I mean, they're, I mean, they're relatives, man. They're almost, man. Did you see that thing in the news about that chimp in, oh my God, it was like in a zoo,

I think in Seattle or, I don't know, it might have been in Washington State. I'm not sure. It was somewhere watching it. there was a zoo where in a monkey enclosure, one monkey came back with fucking 10 commandments and started proselytizing to the... Like, he came back with like a slab of rules and started like...

And did they study... And did they study the rules? What did the rules say? Well, he was just screaming it unintelligibly, but they found like monkey 10 commandments, is what I'm saying. Oh. That's fucking nuts.

Yeah. I can't believe that happened. I can't believe that's real. imagine God, God tried talking about the Jewish people. How would you feel honestly? How would you feel honestly?

If you were like at a zoo and then you were in the monkey closure then one chip came back with two stone tablets and started yelling and then all the other and then all the other monkeys looked up and stood upright like and got real silent.

Like how would, how would you feel in that scenario? I'd be, it'd be funny enough because I don't know if I can't say this or not, but it'd be like, damn. The Jewish people made God

so mad he went to monkeys bro he was like i tried to save these ones they didn't listen they threw my son to the romans so i'm gonna try monkeys that's and i'll be like yo it's a bit late crazy yeah yeah he did he didn't sleep on this shit

for quite some time yeah he took a break he was like he was like all right this failed let me just let me just for 2000 2023 years he just like let me just take a fucking long as nap he was like i woke up and he's like Oh, yeah, fuck humans.

But, dude, no, back to the fucking Mexican alien. Look, I saw a lot of people being like, is that real? And it was actually concerning to me that it was that many people. Like, it was more people than I was expecting, because they were like, look at the x-rays. And, like, there's fallopian tubes. And I'm like, what are you fucking talking? First of all, send this to an actual scientist, if it's so real. Don't, like, just throw it in front of, like, Mexican parliament or whatever the fuck, whatever the fuck is going on out of Earth.

It's a fucking clown show. down there. You know how many times aliens have been on the Mexican news? It's insane. It's actually, I don't think you could, I don't think a single person could count the amount of times that aliens have been on the Mexican news. I actually don't think it's possible. Aliens and angels are on Latin American news regularly, bro.

Yeah, yeah, literally. It's like, oh, look at this angel. Look at this angel caught on camera and it's literally fucking Photoshop. There's a kid falling on a tree. There's a kid falling on a tree to his death. That's all it is. It's insane Yeah, it was a little weird That

That I I sometimes I always feel like I I'm not surprised How stupid people are But then sometimes I still end up being surprised

It's like a thing where I'm like Come on guys It's like reverse surprise You're surprised at how surprised you were Despite the fact that you've never been surprised Surprise Whoa that surprised me I should know this

It's just like you even talking about the stuff that people, some fucking, some fucking dude that gets up in church and wearing robes and shit tells people these stupidest stories that make not a lick of sense. And then people are like, yeah, I'm not gay no more. I'm not gay no more. I'm delivered. I'm delivered. Yeah, yeah. Like I'm like we have so much evidence of how silly people are. But still, still sometimes where I feel like we should all come together and.

be like, oh, well, this is obviously bullshit. All right. Just like, let's have it. Just have a good laugh, but then there's people questioning it. And I'm like, why do you, man? What happened is you need, you know people. You need dumb people around so they can do what we want them. Yes, we do.

You do. You do. I really don't think so. We have machines for that, man. We got machines now. We can bully machines. You need dumb people. We need Boston Dynamics, and then all the dumb people can, they can go away.

They can leave now. We need them. We need people that are satisfied. You're right. We need them for Mars. We need them. We need them. to have around so it's in case when

when war starts against the machines we have them to go first the machines we need we need them around to test all of our drugs on I gotta help us live longer because they don't know what the fuck they're getting to set up for it don't know what kind of shit they're gonna get we need them around to lift heavier things because you know so they're dumb I love

their inhibitors are off so they can lift I love that it's I love that it's a mummified alien like it's a mummified it's an alien it's an alien that's what we learn multiplication from Mummaphication in general is kind of advanced. I'm eventually learning from something else.

How is it mummified, though? Like, that's what I want to know. That's what I mean. Was there an explanation? I didn't like. No, there's no explanation. It's just like, did you see that video? Did you see that video of them placing the alien down on the table?

Yeah. And it's so fucking tiny. That's the thing that like really got me. Where I'm like, they made them so small. Like, come on, man. Like, I would believe it. I would honestly be a lot more inclined to believe it if it was just, I don't know, five foot. You know?

Even if it was five foot, I'd be like, first of all, that's a big project for a single person to undergo. Yeah. So, like, but like that, like, I know jack shit about, like, arts and crafts or whatever. I could build that Mexican mummy. That's so fucking I could do that. I could do that. Like, I could do that today, probably. Like, I'd go to color me mine and have it done in fucking three hours.

It was very lazy, in my opinion. Dude, there is right now, right now. a video going viral. Somebody made a cake. Hello, hello. I'm Malcolm Gladwell, host of Smart Talks with IBM. I recently spoke with IBM's new director of research,

Jake Gambata. We discussed his vision for the future of quantum computing. At IBM research, what we always do is answer what is the future of computing, whether it's coming up with new algorithms, coming up with better AI, coming up with quantum,

or coming up with just how do different accelerators go together. It's our DNA to answer the question of what is the future. Isn't it a perfect problem for IBM because you kind of need to have a legacy of building stuff? Yes. Building actual physical machines. Yeah, it's why I came to IBM. I wanted the experience, the culture of building hard things that others have not done before. Where do you imagine we are in the timeline of this technology?

There will come a point when it will mature. Right? My cell phone is a mature technology at this point. How far are we from that point with Quantum? By 2029, we'll build the first fault-tolerant quantum computer. That is one that can run a very, very large, large problem. To learn how IBM is building the future of computing, visit IBM.com slash quantum. All right, quick quiz for the hiring managers out there.

What's worse? staffed or being poorly staffed? Well, that's a trick question, because both are recipes for chaos. Either way, just say to yourself, this is a job for Indeed's sponsored jobs. You'll get matched with candidates that meet the skills, certifications, and everything else you're looking for, or go a different way and get no traction. Seriously, sponsored jobs posted directly on Indeed are 95% more likely to report a hire than non-sponsored jobs. It really is a no-brainer. Spend less time searching and more time actually interviewing candidates who check all your boxes. Less stress, less time, more results.

When you need the right person to cut through the chaos, this is a job for Indeed's sponsored jobs. And listeners of this show will get a $75-sponsored job credit to help your job get the premium status it deserves. At Indeed.com slash podcast. Just go to Indeed.com slash podcast right now. Indeed.com slash podcast. Terms and conditions apply.

Need to hire? This is a job for Indeed's sponsored jobs. of that alien. And it is a good three foot to four foot cake. They did up. They put more time and effort into baking that cake than those assholes did to throwing that shit together. It's a really good cake, man.

It looks good. I was like, man, I actually want a piece of that shit. That sounds awesome. Mexican, Mexican alien cake. It's pretty. I love what people do that where it's like, it looks like some realistic thing, then they cut into it.

And I'm like, oh, I like that. Is it real or is this cake? Those are satisfying videos. That's so fucking ridiculous. What the hell? That's so fucking awesome. Is it real or is it cake?

It's come. Is it real or is it cake, stupid? Yeah, that's really convinced. There's a video of them cutting into the cake and everything, and it looks exactly like the fucking Mexican alien. I was like, dude, I bet you, whoever made that cake spent more time with that cake than those dickheads did with... Stop.

Yeah, it does look delicious, too. Like, I'm not a cake guy at all. Yeah. I'm not a cake man, even slightly, but this looks pretty fucking good. I love cake, man. I just have a... I, in my late 20s or maybe 30s,

I'm not even sure, but I developed a food sensitivity to eggs, and it is, it's the worst... As a guy that would eat eggs, all the fuck... Because there's eggs in, like, everything. Dude, eggs are great. And now, like, when I eat it,

I get the worst. fucking, because I don't have like an allergic reaction. It's just like a sensitivity to where I get the worst heartburned. And it took me a while to figure it out. It started to narrow down what I would eat. Because I used to, I used to be like a breakfast burrito guy, chorizo and eggs, um, coat the chicken I would make, you know, what they, like, the fucking eggs and everything. Fried rice had egg.

And then I started to figure it out. I was like, it's fucking eggs, dude. It broke my heart. That's really heartbreaking. Yeah. If I, if I, is there nothing you can take for that? Is there like, no, I looked it up because I thought the same thing. Like, oh, you know, you just, if you lack the enzymes to break down lactose, you can get those pills.

Right. Right. Yeah. No, I found nothing for that. They're just like, get fake eggs. There's this vegan egg shit and it smell. When you open it, it smells so fucking gross that I'm like, yo, couldn't science just make this smell like eggs, you fucking pieces of shit? So, like, it has the consistency of eggs when you cook it, but it ain't egg.

And so, uh, Jojo bought it. a couple of times. I'm like, that's cool, but nah. The only thing I haven't tried yet is maybe it's specifically just a yoke. So I just need to I haven't got around to it, because I'm already mad that, like, most likely I'm probably going to be sensitive

to the white too, and I just don't want to get more disappointed. Yeah, yeah, I know. Yeah, that's, that's rough. That would be rough on me. Yeah, because I'm like a big, uh, I'm like a big egg sandwich guy. Yeah. Like I'm, like, I need my bacon, egg and cheese, man. Yeah, eggs are great, man. Yeah, like, yeah, like, I fucking,

Last time I hung out with my mom, we had the croissants and I had to take the fucking egg out. It was like, it was bacon, bacon, egg, croissant. I'm like, I just had a croissant with a fucking bacon in it. It's stupid. That's so rough. What's your guys' stance on BLTs? Amazing. Really?

Amazing, yeah. I don't personally, I don't consider. Like a nice chicken patty on it? Like a nice chicken patty on it? No, no, no, no. That's exactly my point. I don't. Especially.

Bacon enough meat to be like a protein for the sandwich or whatever. Yeah. Yeah. It's entirely, it's an additive. Yeah. It's like, it's like a seasoning meat almost where it's like to the point where it's like, where it's like this is you put on, you put this on other meat or like other things to kind of give them definition. But you can't just have like. I totally agree.

I don't like how a lot of breakfast places they compare bacon to sausage where it's like, do you want bacon? and you want sausage. And my thing is I'm like, fuck, well, I want both, bitch. Yeah, right? And then same. I'm so glad you said that because I felt the exact same way for someone. I was like, why the fuck are you giving me the option between these two things that aren't even equivalent to each other? Just let

me have both of them. And that's what I usually do. I usually go like, you know, let me get bacon, can I get a side of sausage? But then it's like, it's fucking crazy that I have to make that distinction. Yeah. Dude, that's the old that's the right call. That is it right there. They've been cheating us for so long that I'm like, how dare you say these two little

slitters of bacon are the equivalent, bitch. It's always two fucking paltry slithers of bacon, too. It's like, you can't even give me four. Yeah, exactly that. At least like make it worth my fucking while, four pieces. If you're going to give me just this fucking thing. It's fucking loose. I don't know. Imagine if somebody gave you... I like I like bacon a lot. Imagine somebody gave you...

Kingston, Kingston, Kingston. Imagine somebody gave you a hot dog bun and put bacon in it. And that was it. Two slithers of bacon. What's going on? Yeah, dude. That's going on, dude. That's insane. Isn't that fucking insane? They're like, what the fuck is this? Where's the actual?

Where's the entree? Where is it? Where's it? Yeah. Where's the fucking meat, bro? Damn, that's, I feel like we can change the world with this one. We got to make this go viral. Let these motherfuckers know.

We have to ban. We have to ban the BLT. We have to kill. The BLT's delicious, though. I love it. It's a little, it's a little bit, a little bit of a little bit. It's a little bit of a little bit. It's, like, I've never had a BLT and felt like I ate something.

Like, it's, so bizarre, like I feel more hungry after the BLT than I do fucking before it. And it makes no sense. It's a confusing sandwich. It's barely a sandwich, man. Hello, hello. I'm Malcolm Gladwell, host of Smart Talks with IBM. I recently spoke with IBM's new director of research, Jake Mbata.

We discussed his vision for the future of quantum computing. At IBM research, what we always do is answer what is the future of computing, whether it's coming up with new algorithms, coming up with better AI, coming up with quantum, or coming up with just how do different accelerators go together. It's our DNA to answer the question of what is the future. Isn't it a perfect problem for IBM because you kind of need to have a legacy of building stuff? Yes. Building actual physical machines.

Yeah, it's why I came to IBM. I wanted the experience, the culture of building hard things, that others have not done before. Where do you imagine we are in the timeline of this technology? There will come a point when it will mature. Right? My cell phone is a mature technology at this point. How far are we from that point with Conton?

By 2029, we'll build the first fault-tolerant quantum computer. That is one that can run a very, very large, large problem. To learn how IBM is building the future of computing, visit IBM.com slash quantum. All right, quick quiz for the hiring managers out there. What's worse? Being understaffed or being poorly staffed?

Well, that's a trick question, because both are recipes for chaos. Either way, just say to yourself, this is a job for indeed sponsored jobs. You'll get matched with candidates that meet the skills, certifications, and everything else you're looking for. Or go a different way and get no traction.

Seriously, sponsored jobs posted directly on Indeed are 95% more likely to report a higher than non-sponsored jobs. It really is a no-brainer. Spend less time searching and more time actually interviewing candidates who check all your boxes. Less stress, less time, more results. When you need the right person to cut through the chaos, this is a job for Indeed's sponsored jobs. And listeners of this show will get a $75-sponsored job credit to help your job get the premium status it deserves at Indeed.com slash podcast. Just go to Indeed.com slash podcast right now. Indeed.com slash podcast.

Terms and conditions apply. Need to hire? This is a job for Indeed's sponsored jobs. What was the last time you had a BLT? I don't think I've ever had one. Last time I had a BLT was, I remember it was 2012. I remember I made myself a BLT because it was the only ingredients that we had. And I remember because it was like a very specific semester in college that I really, really remember.

And I had it. and I couldn't fucking believe how nothing it felt. It felt... With a nice, grilled chicken patty, though,

but that's Kingston. That's a chicken sandwich. That's a chicken sandwich. Well, that's a chicken bLT. That's a chicken club. That's a chicken BLT. It's a chicken club.

It's not a club. No, it's not a chicken bLT. It's not a club. Oh my God. There's no such thing as a chicken BLT because the chicken BLT is just a chicken sandwich. No, it's a chicken.

They exist. What do you mean? How are you telling me this? Oh my God. Look up chicken BLT. A. They exist. They literally exist.

How are you telling? I've ordered them. They're like my favorite sandwich to order. Kingston, Kingston, Kingston. If I got chicken in my bacon, egg and cheese, would you call it a chicken, bacon, egg, and cheese, would you call it a chicken chicken cheese with chicken? It's literally the same as them saying. No, it's a fucking chicken sandwich. You got a cheese pizza with pepperoni.

Yeah, it's fucking... Or like early... Because the BLT part still has creedings. You got cheese pizza or pepperoni, dude. It's a chicken sandwich. You're right. But it was like, what kind of chicken sandwich you want? Oh, let me get a chicken BLT.

Like, yeah. That's how you define it. That's more definition to it. No. It is. It's more, it's more descriptive, but it's not actually what it's, like, it's a chicken sandwich is it, that's a chicken sandwich. Yeah, like what you describe you, so I just looked up.

Chicken BLT sandwich. Chicken BLT sandwich. Groot chicken BLT sandwich. Chicken BLT sandwich. That's not a, oh, shut the fuck up. People call them. That's what they're called. I saw it on the internet.

So it's true. You guys are a bunch of fucking moots. You guys are fucking moots now. I saw the Mexican aliens on the fucking dudes. Look, look, look, look. Did you know they have fallopian tubes? Right now, right now, I'm not admitting that. It is a chicken sandwich.

You are right. But you guys are out here trying to tell me that it is not called the chicken BLT, which is actually fucking ridiculous. It's a chicken fucking sandwich. It's a chicken bLT. It's a sandwich. It's a chicken BLT. It's a sandwich.

It's okay. Hey, with McDonald's, when you get a chicken BLT, why is it not called a chicken BLT? And it's just called a deluxe. They don't have to McDonald's. What are you talking about? Yes, they do. It's a deluxe.

When you get the deluxe, they add fucking extra shit on it. You can get lettuce and tomato on your chicken sandwich, but it's just a deluxe. Just like a chick filet. But it's not a chicken BLT. It's a fucking deluxe. It doesn't come with bacon on it, Derek. The BLT part isn't, if you get a deluxe? I've ordered it before.

You may have ordered it. Like, can I get bacon also? It's like, oh, yeah, cool. No, it's a chicken sandwich sandwich. It's an option. It's an option for the deluxe. Look at their menu. They have the basic chicken sandwich with pickles on it, and then they have the one where they put fucking everything on it. They don't put bacon on it naturally. You have to ask for bacon as well. No, they don't. I mean, I mean, what? Let's stop a little. Naturally. When it has bacon. It's called the McChicken now. McChicken, yes, I know. Sandwiches. I don't imagine the McChicken doesn't come with bacon or lettuce or tomato on it either. Here's a thing. Their favorite sandwiches there. Here's the old... Here's the older...

Oh, well, Mick Crispy, sorry, McChryspin. Kingston. If I have a... Let me just... The simplest argument that I could think to Musser, right? Let me say... Let's say I get a bacon, cheese, a bacon burger, right? Yes.

Just a bacon hamburger, right? Yes. What does it... What does it? It has lettuce. Lettuce. Tomato. Tomato.

Mayo. And... And... Onions. Well, okay. Well, hold on. Mayo and onions. That's what a burger has.

I mean, it could, yes. But, like, you could order. a burger, right? The core ingredients of a burger, by the way, or lettuce and tomato and meat and maybe cheese. Like the onion doesn't need to be there. The onion is a nice way to ask if you want onions or not, because onion comes on it. I like onions. I like onions.

I'm just saying, like, the generalize, if you drew a burger, if you drew a burger, like, if you drew one or like saw one in a cartoon, it's always bad. It's always lettuce, tomato and meat. Like, that's always what it is. I would say onions goes there too, but continue. I've never, I, no, no. 100%, 100% yes, but continue. All right, whatever, whatever. You're free to be wrong.

Is a burger then... If a burger than... If a burger than... A hundred percent... Oh, my fucking God. A hundred percent. Thanks for helping me, Dary. You dummy.

You dumb, I didn't. If you just look it up right now, there's... If you look at a picture of a fucking crabby-pity, they don't have onions on it. They don't know. In lore, they do.

Chris, they literally do. In lore. They literally do. They don't show... Oh my God. They don't show... Look at the fucking burger. You don't even see...

I don't even see the tomato on it naturally. if you look at my god even like the famous the famous picture of the real crabby patty from that from that episode where it goes dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun is literally bread tomato lettuce cheese and meat that's it you fucking it literally has onion on it great oh my god i'm sure in lore there's been very it's a cartoon right if you look at the vault of crabby patties look at the carriez Chris are you fucking Chris this is I'm gonna be real now. I'm gonna stop using my... I'm looking at it.

I'm looking at it. Are you fucking retarded, my nigga? I am looking at it, my guy. There's literally an onion on top of the fucking tomato. You actual chimp. You actual, you actual, you fucking ignorant. It's literally right there. It's on the top of it, Chris.

It's literally the patty. It's literally... Chris, it's right there. Chris, I'm looking at it. No, it's not. Christopher, I'm looking at it. Christopher, I'm staring at it. You are blind.

Chris would like me to stream my image. It's with a real crabby pad. When it's like duttly dot-d-d-th-th-th-th-th-th-th. It's literally an onion on top of the tomato. I'll show you a regular picture of a stack crabby-patti. This article that you linked? So it has no fucking... It's right. I'm staring at it, Chris.

It's right. The Metro. The U.K. It opens up just fine for me. Oh, yeah, yeah. No, like this Metro UK is actually a perfect example. There's no fucking onion on it. And then go to the vault with the crabby-patti where there's a vault of them.

Go to the one where... The image with the real... Listen, listen, listen, listen, listen. I'm going to take a fucking screen. I have a screenshot. Listen. I want to show, I'm going to let you, I just got to, I need to show Sweeney that he is incorrect about this. Because I'm going to take a screenshot of just an average crabby patty.

And it's you only either see tomato in it or you know what tomato. It's just lettuce and cheese. Guys, yes. That is the, that is. Yes. The animated crabby patty. This is beside the point. You just see lettuce.

The image of the real crabby patty. The episode that Chris just. that Chris just told me that I was wrong about literally has an onion. You are incorrect. I'm staring at the onion at the top. That's not the fucking point. The point is if I get a burger, if I get a burger with lettuce, tomato, bacon, and meat, that is not a fucking BLT. No, it's not.

It's a burger. Why? Why is it not a BLT? Why is it not a BLT? Why is it not a BLT? It's a burger. It's a burger. Because it's a BLT.

Because a BLT. BLT. Because here's the thing. First of foremost. Because a BLT, what necessitates a BLT is that it's bacon, lettuce, tomato, and that's it. That's like the people who say like, oh, let's, let me go a grilled cheese sandwich with fucking all this extra shit. Like, no, no, that's not what a grilled cheese fucking sandwiches. A grill cheese sandwich is literally bread and cheese grill.

That's what a grill cheese sandwich is. First and foremost, a burger at that moment usually comes on a burger patty. And then even by itself, it would just be a, it was, it's a burger. I agree with you on that. I agree that a chicken BLT is also a chicken sandwich. But when you're going to order, you don't order a chicken sandwich with lettuce, tomato, and bacon. No, you're like, oh, can I just get a chicken BLT? You do.

No, you don't. Nobody says that. It's crazy. I have never heard of a sandwich with bacon, lettuce and tomato. I've never heard of your life. It doesn't even say that at people's restaurants. You don't even say that at the restaurants. Hello, hello, I'm Malcolm Gladwell, host of Smart Talks with IBM.

I recently spoke with IBM's new director of research, Jake Gambata. We discussed his vision for the future of quantum computing. At IBM research, what we always do is answer what is the future of computing, whether it's coming up with new algorithms, coming up with better AI, coming up with quantum, or coming up with just how do different accelerators go together. It's our DNA to answer the question of what is the future. Isn't it a perfect problem for IBM because you kind of need to have a legacy of building stuff? Yes.

Building actual physical machines. Yeah, it's why I came to IBM. I wanted the experience, the culture of building hard things that others have not done before. Where do you imagine we are in the timeline of this technology? There will come a point. when it will mature, right? Yeah. My cell phone is a mature technology at this point.

How far are we from that point with quantum? By 2029, we'll build the first fault-tolerant quantum computer. That is one that can run a very, very large, large problem. To learn how IBM is building the future of computing, visit IBM.com slash quantum. All right, quick quiz for the hiring managers out there. What's worse? Being understaffed or being poor? poorly staffed. Well, that's a trick question, because both are recipes for chaos. Either way,

just say to yourself, this is a job for Indeed's sponsored jobs. You'll get matched with candidates that meet the skills, certifications, and everything else you're looking for. Or go a different way and get no traction. Seriously, sponsored jobs posted directly on Indeed are 95% more likely to report a hire than non-sponsored jobs. It really is a no-brainer. Spend less time searching and more time actually interviewing candidates who check all your boxes. Less stress, less time, more results. When you need the right person to cut through the chaos, this is a job for Indeed's sponsored jobs.

And listeners of this show will get a $75-sponsored job credit to help your job get the premium status it deserves at Indeed.com slash podcast. Just go to Indeed.com slash podcast right now. Indeed.com slash podcast. Terms and conditions apply. Need to hire? This is a job for Indeed sponsored jobs. I'm just, look, man, whatever.

Nah, you can't let this motherfucker. I can't, I can't. I don't, like, the audience will do it. Guys, I'm not even disagreeing with you. But the fact that you guys are like, no, you don't order like, yes, I've never seen anybody but like, yo, can I get a chicken sandwich? Like, yeah, what you want on it? Can I get, usually say it would just come with like something.

Everybody says literally everybody orders a chicken sandwich that way. They have like chopoleil, with like lettuce on it, maybe pickle or something like that. But you're like, hey, there's always a chicken BLT sandwich. That's a thing. That is a thing. I have never seen that in my life. That is crazy. I've looked up.

Give me an example of a restaurant where you've walked in. You're like, give me the chicken BLT. You're probably not going to know this. Let me see if I can remember the exact name. Is it some fucking mom and pop bullshit? Chris, do you remember the sandwich place next to Dragons Den and Piquet? Sugar and Spice Cafe. It might not be there anymore.

Sugar and Spice Cafe. I would always get after I'd play Yu-Gi-O, this is 14, 15-year-old Kingston. I'd play Yu-Gi-O and then I would get a chicken BLT sandwich afterwards. Every time, every single time. And that's what you would, that's what you would tell, like, on their menu. You would say that, and it was on their menu. Yes.

So you have, it was on the menu? So you have the chicken BLT was on the menu. Yes, it was a chicken BLT. So we have this one example that we can't verify. They would have, they would have, they would have, they would have the, I believe, like, here's what I believe. Here's what I believe. I believe that you knew these people well enough.

they were willing to make whatever fucking God forsaken sandwich you wanted. And they understood what, and they understood what you meant by chicken BLT. I am so... Because it's obvious what it means. But it's crazy... That's just such a crazy fucking...

It's not a BLT anymore. It's just a fucking chicken sandwich. It's a BLT with chicken. It is. There's no such thing as a BLT with anything else because the second anything else is added to a BLT, it becomes something else. Yeah, it's just, like I said,

in the beginning, it was just a stupidest of both. Like would you ever say Hey can I get a cheese pizza with sausage and pepperoni And like they look at you like what do you say Why would you say that? Why don't I just get a fucking sausage and pepperoni pizza? Is a cheese pizza as well Yes you wouldn't call it that normally

I agree with that's the whole that is literally the whole point That like yo can I get a pepperoni pizza with sausage Can I get a pepper like there's no reason to call it that because that's not what it is It's like why even It just sounds like some stubborn shit that some people are like No I just want to call it I don't think so. I think you guys are being loose, man.

I think you guys are being stubborn for no reason. It literally is that. No, no, you're the one being stubborn. No, it's not even a hard thing. It's easy. First of all, it's easier to say chicken BLT. They can I get a chicken sandwich or bacon, lettuce, and tomato? Chicken BELT is easier to say.

First of all, first of all, let me just say this. Chicken BLT, heinous. heinous combination of a guy. I don't know why you would do that. You're mad. You're mad. You're mad. You're moving mad.

You get a chicken sandwich. You need a chicken sandwich. You need like mayo. It is weird to do that. You're mad. You guys are insane. You guys are insane. You guys are insane. Tomato doesn't... In my opinion, tomato doesn't...

I'm a little bit of anomaly. I'm a little bit of anomaly. I actually don't like raw tomatoes. I think raw tomatoes ruins the whatever. It's cold and it makes it... I just... I don't like cold-ass things ruining the hotness of my stuff.

And I think... You guys are mad. I just think things on average cooked or, like say, I think like cooked tomatoes, like when you make it, in a sauce it turns awesome. You know, you turn into sauce. Grilled onions, I think, are far superior than raw onions, in my opinion.

These are just, like, my opinion, things. Depends on, like, like, cooking in it, like. Like, to me, I just think raw onions and fucking anything is just better than, I mean, sorry. I love onions. It's like, I love onions. I mean, onions are fucking amazing, but I just feel like the flavor is way better. I don't like cooking them. I don't like eating.

When you think about, like, uh, think about, um, like when people, like, I say, I don't necessarily understand, um, raw, like, like, like, I don't necessarily understand, um, um, like, people who have extremely rare steak when the thing that they really like about it is the seared part which is well you know the the the seared part is well done everything else under it is like you know raw or whatever i don't understand those people because they know the good part of it is when the fire hits the fucking how do you get how do you guys get your steaks so i get it in medium well well done personally but i get my it depends on the place but i like uh since most chefs don't want to actually cook a steak well done.

If you say well done, it'll end up being like medium rare, which is fine for me. So that's usually how like say there's a steakhouse up in North Las Vegas. That's fucking amazing. So I'll say like a well done because if you if you say medium well, it'll usually just be medium. They usually got to go a little bit. So I say well done and then they'll do it. So there's some pink in it. And I'm okay with a little bit of pink.

But the thing is like I'm not a baby. I can chew. So because usually people are like, oh, it's so tough. I'm like. And then you talk to those same. people and if you give them beef jerky, it needs to be as tough as rocks. Like, they're crazy to me. They're like, that's not real beef jerky, that's slimy soft shit.

But then if you give them a slimy soft fucking piece of steak, they love it. And I'm like, what the fuck is wrong with you people? I mean, I kind of know, because I understand that to a degree. We call them a nigga state Nazis, man. I don't agree with that specific because I'm not really a jerky. I don't like jerky really at all. It's just like authentic way to eat things is what I'm saying. These people say the authentic way to eat a steak is Syria and.

and then it's bleeding in the middle, so blah, blah, blah. But the authentic way to eat jerky is it's fucking so dried out that it could break your teeth. Now, I like cowboy jerky, man. I like some real jerky. I'm just saying, my teeth can handle it so I can handle a well-done steak, too. Right. It's not exactly jerky, but, like, there's, my family will do this whenever they make, like, a pork, like a, like a giant slab of pork or whatever.

Uh-huh. where they'll cook it. I think it's called, like, I don't know if it's exactly called chicharon because I've seen, I've, I've Googled chichotron and that's not what it is.

Cheetah, no, so there's two different kinds. There's chicharon. Do you know what I mean? I know what you mean. Yeah. We'll describe what you're talking about. So let me just finish the description.

So what it is, it's like you cook, you roast the pork, but then the outside is kind of like glazed and really like burnt to shit. Yeah. And then that stuff you kind of like peel off. And it's basically like fucking glass.

But it's so fucking delicious. I can't even fucking expect. It's like a separate snack that you have after the fucking I've had chichron in several ways. I've had chichron

where you go to Mexican places they're pretty much the stars. There's today as you people they put lime in. They put lime in like the star wheels. I've had those. I've had classic chicheron where it's pretty much

you braze the steak at first and then you fry you braze the ham then you fry and chop it up and then that's chicheron that way I, my family makes it. then there's Chichiron

where it's just like pork rinds pretty much. Hello, hello. I'm Malcolm Gladwell, host of Smart Talks with IBM. I recently spoke with IBM's new director of research, Jake Mbeta. We discussed his vision for the future of quantum computing. At IBM research, what we always do is answer what is the future of computing,

whether it's coming up with new algorithms, coming up with better AI, coming up with quantum, or coming up with just how, do different accelerators go together. It's our DNA to answer the question of what is the future. Isn't it a perfect problem for IBM because you kind of need to have a legacy of building stuff? Yes. Building actual physical machines.

Yeah, it's why I came to IBM. I wanted the experience, the culture of building hard things that others have not done before. Where do you imagine we are in the timeline of this technology? There will come a point when it will mature. Right? My cell phone is a mature technology at this point. How far are we from that point with Quantum? By 2029, we'll build the first fault-tolerant quantum computer.

That is one that can run a very, very large, large problem. To learn how IBM is building the future of computing, visit IBM.com slash quantum. All right, quick quiz for the hiring managers out there. What's worse? being understaffed or being poorly staffed? Well, that's a trick question, because both are recipes for chaos. Either way, just say to yourself, this is a job for Indeed's sponsored jobs. You'll get matched with candidates that meet the skills, certifications, and everything else you're looking for.

Or go a different way and get no traction. Seriously, sponsored jobs posted directly on Indeed are 95% more likely to report a hire than non-sponsored jobs. It really is a no-brainer. Spend less time searching and more time actually interviewing candidates who check all your boxes. Less stress, less time, more results. When you need the right person to cut through the chaos, this is a job for Indeed sponsored jobs. And listeners of this show will get a $75 sponsored job credit to help your job get the premium status it deserves. At Indeed.com slash podcast.

Just go to Indeed.com slash podcast right now. Indeed.com slash podcast. Terms and conditions apply. Need to hire? This is a job for Indeed. D's sponsored jobs. Yeah, that's not what I'm talking about. Yeah, yeah.

The way I know about it, it's literally, it's literally like a shell around the pork that you crack and you break into pieces and you just have like this plate of basically pork glass that sounds so horrible. That's the one. That is so delicious. Fucking, that shit is the most delicious shit I've had in my life. It's so unreasonably good. It doesn't make sense.

Like pork in general is a crazy. crazy ass fucking animal. It's a fucking sad piece of shit animal. Like I really that that poor fucking animal is so delicious and it doesn't even it knows how delicious it is too because of how horrible it sounds like when you were like trying to kill it like it's because it's It tries its best to like not be killed because it knows your memories bro That is a sound I'll never forget in my life. It's all hearing pigs dies mortified They sound like kids. It's fucking crazy. I saw I saw I saw I saw I saw I saw a pig. Dude, I saw a pig. I saw a pig get dragged underwater by like a crocodile once.

Not in person, obviously, in a video. And it screamed out of me. Yeah, it was, it was literally screaming. It was like, whoa, whoa! Like, it was crazy. It was like fucking screaming. And it said, whoa. Yeah. And it starts spinning, too. Like, whoa. Did it crash bandicoot twirl to try to get away? They usually be scared. No, man. It's fucking. It's looney tunes over there, man.

It's, ooh, I can't, I can't. I hope that, like, there's never any dystopic shit happening. We have to start killing our own food because I don't want to, man. I can, I can, but I don't want to. I definitely could. It would stone me, though. It would make me stronger. I could do it with chickens, for sure.

Like, chickens have no chance in hell. Like, I've seen my grandma. I love chickens. Chickens are awesome. They're so fun. But, like, they, like, they, there's nothing going on it. Like, I feel no guilt at all. Like, like, they are almost fucking.

It would be like breaking an iPhone. It would be like breaking it. It's like, I don't care about you. I'll eat you. I'll eat you. I'm not going to crush you for no reason, but like I'll kill you to eat you.

My grandma picked up a chicken. She went, picked it up nicely. It's headed the whole swivel thing. Then she snapped its neck. Quick twist pop tank. And I was like, Grandma,

what the fuck. Turkeys kill themselves, bro. Turkeys are remarkably, turkeys are remarkably unempathetic animals. Like I would beat the shit out of a turkey and leave it there. Like, like, because they're so fucking, like, I remember once, like, in the rain, my, I remember once in, when I was living in upstate New York with my parents, like, when I was young. My mom, like, screamed. And I was like, what the fuck's going on?

And I went downstairs. And there was this, like, crowd of turkeys in the rain, sopping wet, which, by the way, they look fucking disgusting when they're wet. They look so fucking gross when they're soaked in the rain. But, like, they were just, like, next to, like, my screen door. And they looked so fucking disturbing. But I remember looking at it. I was, like, I would have no issue beating the shit out of these things and just leaving them there. Like, I wouldn't even eat them.

You wouldn't even eat it. I wouldn't even eat them. Yeah. Because turkey is not good enough for the... Like, I just... I don't like turkey enough to go through the process of, like, killing a turkey. And then the... the harvesting process to turn that turkey into something usable.

Like, I just, it's not worth it to me. Smoke turkey is the only way I eat turkey now. Once I had smoked turkey, I was like, oh, shit, there's no eating regular turkey anymore. It's insane. You get it from like a deli, put in a sandwich. It's the worst deli meat also, too. No, honey turkey, honey glazed turkey is delicious, bro. It's okay, dude.

Honeyglaze turkey is fine, but you can get honey glaze to anything else, and it's better. I disagree. I don't like honey ham at all. Honey glazed ham is way better. I don't like honeyglaze ham. That's me personally, though. I'm eating honey turkey. That's why that sucks.

I've been eating honey turkey. I don't really eat pork that much. I didn't grow up eating pork a lot. I didn't really do it too much. Oh, dude, I love pork. Pork is, it's too good. It scares me. It's good.

I like bacon. I like bacon a lot. I like pork chops. Pork chops is good as well. I hated how fucking accurate that said. Dude, I said, whatever.

I heard my uncle shoot one and it was still weeing. Oh, that's the worst. Until they don't just kill them and they're making that sound. I'm like, oh. It was a great. What the fuck? What the fuck? It's a crazy song, man.

What the fuck? The idea of, shoot, what's the name of pork in a pig? Imagine hearing people beat the shot of pork in the pig with like rod and like sticks. And you hear him like, he's trying to get words out of the same shit. I'm not I'm not doing this anymore I'm good

I would do it I would do it I would do it just to hear the sound he makes How many people do you think would stop fishing If they like scream How many vegans

Do you think Stop listening to the podcast today Yeah Yeah I'm fuck up though I don't care I'm with you I'm with you

I just want to say this And then we're moving on Vegans I'm with you As soon as they have fucking The meat that is It is interchangeable that the lab grown meat that you can't even tell,

I am 100% on board. I will stop eating. Same. I will stop contributing to the... Vegans are objectively correct. You are objectively correct. I cannot logically argue against you. All I can say to you is I fucking love chicken.

And that's my only... I'm selfish. I sound like a psycho. It is like, it is borderline religious, actually, if you think about it. If you think about like arguing with like an atheist or something, like, why do you believe in this stuff? And it's like, well, I just love. Christ.

Like, I honestly, I, like, honestly, for real, like, it feels that way and I'm, I'm totally cognizant of it. I get it. Me too. You'll wrestle this fucking fried chicken out of my hands when I'm dead, okay?

Or when you find something better. If vegans started trying to take chicken away from me, I would eat vegans. I would go to start eating veg. You just, he's just, I would, deep fried vegans. I would, the vegan would take out of my hand, I would look at them and I'd bite their,

I'd bite a huge bite out of their arm. and I'd be like, leave now or I'll eat more of you. Do you see where, did you see Rick bite one of those dudes in the neck? Did you see that? Yeah, one of the whispers.

He was like, he was so, he was so out of options that he just lunged at this dude and bit his throat. You gotta do what you gotta do, bro. It was the funniest fucking thing I've ever seen in the show.

It was, it was so like, brutal, animalistic, like, he just snaps and it's the funniest. I'm like, I love, I just love the idea.

idea of someone being that savage. You know, it's crazy. In The Walking Dead, when you look at the timeline, bro, it hasn't even been that long since the world has ended, bro. It's been like maybe 10, 10, 11 years since the world's gone

to shit, bro. Look how bad Rick looks, bro. Well, that's actually, that's actually a long. Look at how terrible Rick looks. That's, I mean, that's a pretty long time. Chris, Rick hair was a long time. Rick's hair was brown.

And he was shaved when the series starts. When you see where he is at the end of the series, that man looks like he's lived 20 years. It's 10 years in a post-pocalypse. Granted, his life is horrible. That is the most stressful existence to have, probably. But he looks bad, bro. Yeah, he looks kind of like, we should, uh...

He looks kind of like, he looks a little bit like Sarmond, just a little bit like, uh... That is fucking crazy. He's gone through a lot, bro. Nick, it looks like Catholic Thorn by the end of that fucking series, bro. It's terrible. All right, what are we got? We got some fucking questions for these people, these fine, strapping gun audiences.

All right, let's see. They're not strapping. Pussy Pneas. Pussy Pneas T.M. Roden. Pussy Petus. All right. Trademark, too. I really can't believe I've never.

It's, it is weird to me that I have never thought of the concept. of pussy penis. You know what I mean? Like that's, that's almost so obvious. It's almost too, but, you know,

it's just, I don't know, it's like, the idea of like, it's me, pussy penis. It's pretty funny. It's like not a bad idea.

I wonder what it's going to, is it going to be a toy line? I know, I know he has a trademark. What is it going to be, though? Oh, man. What do you trademark it for?

One can only hope maybe a clothing line. Yeah. Pussy penis clothes. That's disgusting. All right. I'll rock. I'll rock it.

Yeah. Pussy penis down on the sleeve. Yeah, I like that. A penis erupting out of a vagina. All right. Let's see. Like water droplets coming out too. Pussy Pienus trademark wrote and he says,

Hello Black Man, Black Man and Tom Sweeney. If you had to pick any of these superpowers, which would it be? Super speed, but only when you Naruto run. Oh, man. That's fine. So these are the three options that we have. Super speed, but only when you Naruto run. Become invisible only when you close your eyes.

Or you can see through walls, but it's in 144. 144P. So now it's a run super speed easily. Huh. Yeah, I don't know. There's no detriment to that. Well, I guess, like, nobody can see you? Are you running fast enough to where people can't see you?

Do that? Yeah, it's super speed. It's super speed. Okay. Yeah. So no one would see you. Yeah, because that's my main thing. I just don't want to be embarrassed.

Like, that's super speed for a human. That's like double, like, humans, the top speed of a human. Like, a person running at 70. First of all, if you run like that, you probably can't turn as well. but I would just stop I'll just put my arms down If you're going to 45 miles an hour People can see you do that

No but like If you're only like if you're only like Flash level speed you know like Yeah if we're doing flash level You can't turn well like that I just can't I can't a bear to see somebody See me run like that It's too embarrassing

Yeah That's you Until you'd rather shit myself in public Than like catch somebody That's you until you run them over a volcano And let go of them Then they talk shit and you run and let go I don't know

Until you fucking punch their balls real fast. How bad? How bad is 144P? It's kind of bad, actually. You think, you think, I think it's better than what it. Because 480 is bad, bro. 140, okay, so I'm going to, I'm watching a destiny trailer at 144P.

Huh. I don't know. That's still a lot of information. I, whatever, dude. I think that's, that's like really, that could potentially be useful. But what do you, so then what do you, are you trying to, like, what would you use it for to, like, rob stuff or? No, I mean, just to, yeah, I guess I don't know. I guess I, I wouldn't have any real reason to use it.

I just watched a donkey video on 144P, and that shit looks ridiculous. It's pretty bad, yeah. You're, I don't know. The way your brain will prox information would get fucked up. Yeah. That was a good one. That was fun. I don't know.

I think, I guess I'm probably going to go with the run, because people won't see you. Yeah. If you are going that fast. If you're invisible, you're going to die. You're just going to die. To be fair, that is pretty useful. No, it's not. It is fucking, if you're in a bind, man.

You can see through your eyelids. You're invisible. Oh, that's kind of. Well, that's, well, yeah, that's, that is. Holy shit. That is true. I hadn't thought of that. So that actually might be super fucking useful.

That might be useful. If you close your eyes, eh, it's almost dead. Like, yeah. Yeah. Actually, you know what? I'm going to go with invisible. I feel like I would benefit more from invisibility than I would from Super Speed.

If I wasn't invisible, I wouldn't make people hurt themselves. I would make people hurt themselves. I would say, your sins are finally. The thing is, like, I would sneak into places. I would sneak into places, not even because I needed anything from them, but just as a game. Just to see if I could. You know what I mean? Because I love stealth.

I love stealth games. I love stealth in video games. And the fact that that's like an underserved genre right now means if I, if I have this power, I could just make my own stealth game everywhere. Sneak into buildings I don't belong in. Sneaking to fucking, sneak into fucking, I could probably save the world with this shit. Sneak into fucking, what is it, that Australian guy's house? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Steal all this fucking money.

Yeah, yeah. Just like airdrop all of his money to me. Yeah, yeah, find out where all of his stupid ass, like offshore accounts are and shit. That'd be great. Oh, dude. The havoc I could reek? Yeah, I know. Absolutely.

The visibility is so scary because you would not be able to fake. Like, imagine that. Like, if someone, like, you're invisible, right? If someone's attack, you're fighting, and they throw, they spill something on you, right? And this is what you do. This automatically make things scary for them. You just write a smiley face on your invisible face and two eyes. And then this makes them way more scared than they were before because now you're trying

to get an entity that's happy. And it is like, yo, I would make people lose their minds. I would make people hurt themselves. I would go to people that are not doing. mentally and I had to whisper shit to them to fuck them up even more I would just go I would go ramp it bro

I don't deserve power I would try to manipulate the president like you know you you come up to like Biden and like you just make him like shake him up yeah whisper shit like just keep me like saying I don't know crazy shit like what's a wife's name Jill

yeah like how it just be like yeah I fucking hate you I fucking my name's Jill and I fucking hate you or some shit my name's Jill my name's Jill and I fucking hate you. He's like, oh, not again. It's happening again. And he like freaks out like during a press conference and shit and he starts like pushing

shit over. You see that video of him having to get his, he was at like an international conference and he said like, I don't know about you, but I'm going to go to bed. I'm going to go to bed. I just saw that this morning. I just heard of it. Dude, I'm sorry. Like, we'll talk about this on the on the next episode, I guess.

Yeah. I don't know, man. There's, there's some crazy stuff going on. Anyway, uh, let's move on. Uh, pa, pa, pa, pa, pa, pa, pa, pa, pa. I have the pronouns and Starfield stuff I'm not going to get into that

Thank you Thank you the QR master I You know We would answer the question But it's you know It's a dead topic And we kind of

We kind of killed it In the last episode That we did About it so Boom No You're right It's appreciate it

Please write in again Uh Now I am Become gay The sucker of Cox Nice Not bad Cockin'I

Right saying He says Dumb Stanky Doodheads All right Let's relax Would you rather Sit at a

table at a lunch table with guys who really get upset about pronouns on an RPG or just sit with Chris Chan. Oh, fuck. I don't know. I would sit with Christian. I would have so much. I would say, but I wouldn't say anything. I'd be quiet and start writing things down.

There's so much that I want to know, you know? Like, and I feel like I could get some insight. Maybe I could, I could, I could reach him on like a Chris to Chris basis, you know? He would be like a little bit more trusting of me, you know, and so I could be like, hey, man, what's up with all this? I would like the problem God would be fun though Hey yo

Did you really fuck your mom or it was good Like did that really happen Is that real or did you just say that Because you thought it made you look cool For some reason Because I could see that I could see that for some reason Someone manipulated Christian again

For the 50th time I could see him being like Well If I lose my virginity at all That would be cool You know what I mean So I could see him lying about it But also like I could see him doing it too

So it's like it's all I feel so bad for the guy man Yeah, I feel bad for him I'm not in some sense, but also No, I do feel bad for him because he's just If he just would have never been on the internet He might have just turned out like a regular retarded person I was so,

I can't have I just said that That is a wild thing that you just said Was it on this show that we said that there's an argument That Chris Chan is like Is what hell is? Yeah Like the idea like Like the idea that everybody

like everybody there's that there's that theory about reincarnation or whatever that everybody kind of is everybody at some point like you die and you just sort of become someone else and everybody is it's like a shared kind of soul almost and we experience life

through everybody's eyes and we you know we experience it in real time or whatever Chris Chan is like where you go if you've been like a really bad person like that's that's the body you get stuck in it I just can't make sense yeah

It would make sense, man. I don't know if I'd say, I just, I don't think I would take the... Hello, hello, I'm Malcolm Gladwell, host of Smart Talks with IBM. I recently spoke with IBM's new director of research, Jake Mbata. We discussed his vision for the future of quantum computing. At IBM research, what we always do is answer what is the future of computing, whether it's coming up with new algorithms, coming up with better AI, coming up with quantum or coming up with just how do different accelerators go together.

It's our DNA to answer the question of what is the future. Isn't it a perfect problem for IBM because you kind of need to have a legacy of building stuff? Yes. Building actual physical machines. Yeah, it's why I came to IBM. I wanted the experience, the culture of building hard things that others have not done before. Where do you imagine we are in the timeline of this technology? There will come a point when it will mature.

Right? Yeah. My cell phone is a mature technology at this point. How far are we from that point with Quantum? By 2029, we'll build the first fault-tolerant quantum computer. That is one that can run a very, very large, large problem. To learn how IBM is building the future of computing, visit IBM.com slash quantum. All right, quick quiz for the hiring managers out there.

What's worse? Being understaffed or being poorly staffed? Well, that's a trick question, because both are recipes for chaos. Either way, just say to yourself, this is a job for Indeed's sponsored jobs. You'll get matched with candidates that meet the skills, certifications, and everything else you're looking for. Or go a different way and get no traction. Seriously, sponsored jobs posted directly on Indeed are 95% more likely to report a hire than non-sorough sponsored jobs. It really is a no-brainer. Spend less time searching and more time actually interviewing

candidates who check all your boxes. Less stress, less time, more results. When you need the right person to cut through the chaos, this is a job for Indeed sponsored jobs. And listeners of this show will get a $75 sponsored job credit to help your job get the premium status it deserves at Indeed.com slash podcast. Just go to Indeed.com slash podcast right now. Indeed.com slash podcast. Terms and conditions apply. Need to hire? This is a job for indeed sponsored jobs. Other nerds. And just, uh, because like I, I feel like it would be like, you know, when, uh, the, like the dude, he had that documentary where he was living amongst the bears and stuff like that. Right. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I kind of like just want to do that. Just, just kind of try to assimilate. Are you talking about

the grizzly man? Yes. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I know what happened at the end. Yeah. Yeah. It's so funny. It reminds me, it reminds me of, uh, of that Norm McDi McDonald's like you'll never like when the crocodile hunter died and he goes like everybody everybody kept calling me it's like you'll never guess who died the crocodile hunter it's like of course

of fucking a fucking course got killed by a dangerous animal who like I can't believe that happened crazy it's like whoa a parkourist you'll never guess you'll never guess how this parkourist died it's like yeah let me take a wild stab in the dark bro bro I've

There's so many videos on YouTube of people that are doing parkour fucking up and falling to their deaths. Of course. It's like all over YouTube. That you can't, you're only good at that because you're dumb enough to keep trying. It's not, like, you're not ever going to be in a situation where you can use that effectively, ever. You're going, you are going to die. You can use it effectively. But when they're on skyscrapers and shit, like, that shit is just dangerous.

There's no good reason to be up that high ever. Like if you're living a kind of lifestyle where, like, you're fucking, like, tagging, shit up. Or like if you're a rob, like a person that does parkour, they're probably the ultimate kind of people to rob and mug people because they're gone. Like you, they mug you, they're up a fire scapeer. Like, yo, this guy's, he's up somewhere now. I don't know where he is anymore. I was looking at it for a little bit

and then he did some shimmy and now I don't know where he is. You know that guy that escaped prison? Like, I think he was a parkour dude because he crab walked up a wall. Oh yeah, that fucking guy. That dude who, oh my God, that little Mexican guy. Yeah. What happened?

A little Mexican guy. he's like slayed a bunch of people with like a weapons or whatever. He killed somebody. I think he killed his girlfriend because she was going to narc on him for killing somebody. And so he was in prison and he was going to, I think, get sentenced or he got sentenced. And then he just, he crab walked his way up a wall, jumped over some razor wire and he fucking, he bounced. It's crazy. They caught him.

Oh, they caught him? They caught him. What was that guy's name? I forget his name. Let me look it up. Yeah. Mexican killer escape? Yeah, that should pop it up.

Escaped Pennsylvania prisoner now armed with a stolen rifle and extremely dangerous police say, September 12th. So it's updated because he's been caught. Yeah, yeah. He stole somebody's 22 from their garage. Because at first he escaped because where he escaped, there was a lot of brush and a lot of jungle-ish type of, you know. Danilo Cavalcante taken into custody after he was sedent. seduced subdued by a police dog he was seduced by a police dog I like a big saloos by him come and fuck me whoof-whoop on some scooby-duce yeah whoop bark bark fuck me bark

bark ha ha ha ha bark bark bark and he's like oh homie that's a you're really sexy hey damn homes fuck me damn homes i'll kill you later I'll kill you later. I'll kill you later. I'll kill you later and say, fuck me, woof, fuck me. Fuck me,

woof, whewf. Hey, excuse me, bro, I gotta go fuck this dog real quick, fool.

Oh, no, I can't believe it was a police dog. Oh, he got me, eh? The dog, the dog's wearing a wire

and it's like under a fucking, it's under a police vest, and he doesn't. He didn't know so. He didn't notice. Adios, Neil,

this dog, please. Oh, no, the mama's way you got me. Dude. Ah,

Carajo, they got me, man. All right. Conio. Conio, they got me. Look,

it's, I don't know. I'm so sorry. So this, yeah, but there's a video, if you look up the video of this dude

escaping, it's so funny because he literally just, he, like, it's what I used to do in like my apartment hallway

when I was like a child where you would like you would walk you would put your hands on one wall you put your feet on the other and just like walk up like that and he somehow fucking broke out of prison that way that's insane that that's all that's required to break out of prison like it's like it's like a movie you always think like oh that's

bullshit and this motherfucker does it it's totally real you actually hear about how shitty prison conditions are that there are people that make routes for themselves regularly they'll go to McDonald's, they'll go see their girlfriends, and then they'll come back to prison.

That's crazy. That's crazy. The prison system is so much, like, there needs to be a, there's probably some good documentaries on, I'm sure, but it's so silly when you actually hear about how dumb the conditions are. There's not enough guards, that everything's fucked,

and then people are just like coming in and out. And I'm like, wait, would you just leave forever? Why would you come back in? I don't know, man. People get used to those conditions, man. it's really sad. That is true.

That is true. You get institutionalized. That is true. You don't got to work. You get you three meals a day. You know, it's really, really, really. We got this one.

I do like that. We got this question. We got this question from sandwich. That's pretty good. Hello, you combined Oreo. Since you three are so musically inclined, I have to ask, what is the worst line or bar

in a song you've ever fucking heard? Personally, I think it has to be the line from Fall Out Boys, we didn't start the fire cover. Megan Markle. Oh, yeah. Megan Markle, George. Floyd, Birch Khalifa, Metroid.

It's fucking insane. I've never, I didn't even listen to that song. That's not the line. That is the line in, um, in the fall-up one. That's fucking awesome. So George Floyd rides with Metroid. That's awesome. Wait, what?

And does this show a picture of Sammas fucking like, like, like, uh, what a knee on his neck? Yeah, yeah. What a knee on his neck? And a fucking charge shot waiting behind his head. Yeah, but he continues. There's just something hilarious about rhyming George Floyd with Metroid that both feels out of touch and like they didn't even try. Yeah, it's not a good rhyme and it's also just like not the right place.

I know a pretty fucked up line. It's from Rick Ross. He's like, I put Molly on her, champagne. She didn't even know it. I took a home and enjoyed that. She ain't even know it. I was just like, It's the best.

I was like that, but the beat, that beat is Metro Metro, metro, and the beat's fire. And I'm like, this beat's kind of hypnotic. I fuck with this.

And I heard that line. Your ears perk up like, like, like, when you call a dog? Like, you're like, you're like, wait,

what did he say? She didn't even know it. She didn't even know it. She didn't know I took a home and enjoyed her, bro. And you fucking are bragging about it. That shit's hypnotic.

Yeah, I don't even know. I don't know. I think, the one that I would, uh, oh man, The one that I would pick is probably, um...

Oh, fuck, I just had it, too. I just had it in my brain. Oh. Oh, okay. Yeah, it was, um, it was Kid Rock in, um, fucking Osmosis Jones when he says, uh, when he says, uh, something like, I like them underage, see? Or whatever? Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, I do. Some, some say it's statutory, but I say it's mandatory.

That's a line and a kid rock song. And that's a real line. I'm like, oh, my God. Oh, my God. So it's like, you know, not great. There has to be some sort of context to clear that up, though. There has to be. No, no, no.

He's just, he's just a, man, the amount of, the amount of snitching that people, that artists put in their, in their songs is kind of alarming. I mean, even think about R. Kelly, what do you think about, what is it called, a bump and grind? Yeah. Like, allegedly, that song's about, um, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, a lea. and that's like ultra illegal because he met her you know I think he married her when she was 15 and he was like 27 or something and like so he was like my mind's telling me no but my body my body is telling me yes and it's like this song's just about fucking literally statutory rape I was like this is crazy why would you write it why would you do that

it's like you want to get these feelings out I got to get these feelings yeah yeah I really got to turn it into a song like it's yeah it's one of the things we always say like if if you're going to be a freak pervert whatever degenerate, like, at the very least, keeping your... Such your fucking mouth. What is you doing? Jesus Christ. You think out of just self-preservation, you would think, like, yeah, I'm not going to write this song. So what happens is that

recently there was... Because you have to know, like, even back then when it was, like, more normal... Like, I mean, like, it was more... Through all of human history, for the majority of human history, like, fucking old guys have been marrying, like, fucking 13-year-olds. Like, it's sad, but that's actually, like, very real.

Like, it's maybe like, 0-0-0-0-0-0-0-1% of all of human history has been opposed to that generally, you know? But even so, like, I feel like you still kind of, I don't know, you have to understand on some level that that's not great.

Yeah. And that you probably shouldn't write. But there's so many instances of that, like, in songs, too. Like, there's so many songs about, like, she was just, she was only 14. And she makes my peen scream. Like, it's. It's just, it's fucking crazy.

Like how many songs there are. Stacey's mom. You think about fucking crazy that song is? That's almost, that's almost the reverse kind of. It is the reverse, but it's still kind of a crazy song to write where you're just like,

man, I'm really trying to, like, I'm a kid, I'm really trying to fuck this mom. And I'm like, that's, it's fun,

it's a fun song, but when you think about it, like, it's, like we always say, if the rules are reversed, how fucking people would have freaked the fuck out? If it was like a,

dude, I don't know how old the kid is in the song. Let's just say, 12 or whatever. Stacey's, and then there's like this 30-year-old, 30-year-old dude, and she's like,

fucking, um, yeah, Stacey's dad has got, you know, like, and people would be like, yo,

what's going on? No, imagine, imagine it was just gay, though. Imagine this is this 13-year-old boys trying to fuck Stacy's dad. No,

that's just funny. I like that. Persisting. He's like, look, he's like, look, Stacey's dad.

I wish he was my pre-east. He's like, he locks the door. He walks the dad's doing the laundry. He, like, walks and locks the door. I look, someone's getting fucked right now, man. It's one of us.

How do you guys feel about this? Because Chris Evans recently got married, right? And he's 42, and he got married to a 26-year-old. 26? He got married again. You can know what you want. Yeah. Oh, I didn't even know he was married before.

He got married-he married. I didn't know. Because he married a very old woman before, his first wife. I didn't know that. So he just married down. Well, I will say it's past the age of the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, when there's this thing going on online in the Mano Spears Christian sect where past 25 is just broken.

So at least it's not that thing. That's so crazy. It's so nuts. It's literally insane. I mean, it's true, but like it's nuts. It's true, but it's nuts. It's true, but it's mean. Yeah, so, okay, she's 26.

It's so crazy. My whole thing is it's, I just, I need to see the dynamic before I can judge. It's kind of like, I don't know if you guys seen Boogie 2988's recent. Oh, yeah, yeah. I am one of those people that even though it is legal, I'm like there's no, like, this is a, this chick is hurting. She is not, you know, this is. It's not well people. And it's not even, yeah, and it's not even me speculating.

They have said publicly that they bonded over trauma. And I'm like, of course. That's literally. She's 20 years old. That's literally a trauma bond, and it's like the worst possible way. In the worst possible way. It's so funny that that was like a publicized thing that he said. And he's also 50 and she's like, what, like 20 or something?

She's 20. That's crazy. And if you look at her, like all the signs, because she's admitted that she doesn't have a good relationship with her parents. You look at her, she is. She's thin. She's very much into drugs. like this is just me this is me like looking into it for like

10 minutes and I'm like oh I see what this is looks like Arkansas Look look look look look So let me be real Let me be real Chris Evans is Chris Evans right There's no shortage of pussy he can't get

No All right He can marry any I think the Chris I By the way Just to be clear I think Chris Evan is fine I'm fine

If you're 20 If you're 25 and over like quite frankly like you're a fucking adult you know what you're fucking doing I knew look man if if I would know what I was doing at like personally I would know what I was doing at 22 like if I was if I was like if I was like if I was like trying if I was dating like I don't know some some some Sophia Vergara or something you know what I mean like Sophia Vergara at 22 it's like let me tell you something I know what I'm doing right I know what I'm doing at 22 I know what I'm doing at 26 you absolutely know what you're doing it's fine I guess the only thing that would

change it would be like how long they've been like if it was like they were dating when she was like 20 you know like you know what I mean like if it was like a six year relationship or something and then like the end of they got married like that would be fucking a little a little bizarre a little bit of it a little weird not entirely I think you know

totally legal personally for me right even for me right now someone that is 25 I feel it's a bit young for me even me currently right now I'm I'm a relationship so this is hypothetically if I wasn't I could sleep with someone I was potentially like 22 years old at like my current 29 year old age

but I wouldn't date so I wouldn't date someone well there is yeah there's a difference between like hooking up and dating I think dating is a lot more like but I also find it very weird it's very weird to hold people like I can't wait that she's 18 because then I'm that's like dude dude her being 18 and 17 is a day ago you're a fucking creep bro like watch yeah that's insane yeah yeah yeah But it kind of shows you that I don't freak out as much about you like that Because it's very arbitrary

At the same time I'm not being Absolutely is arbitrary At the same time It totally is My main concern is Because my main concern is obviously Most of these perverts The reason why they go after younger women

Or younger, sorry Young girls is because Oh easily you can fuck It's easier to sleep with them than Someone who's much more mature And it has more self-respect Blah blah blah Those people I'm like

Okay scum bags, I don't freak out about them as much as ones that are actual, you know, I like, I love what people say now. And I've never, like, PDF file. I love that. This is the way to get around it. I love it. So people say PDF files where people who want the prepubescent and stuff, because my whole thing

is much my brain can never even compute a little bit. These, like, these perverts that are waiting for, you said bad baby to turn 18 because at the very least, I'm like, this bitch was like, uh, dressing all, uh, scantily claseless. and she's like oh entering womanhood and shit so at least they're not like oh let me get this stick figure vessel thing and some reason i want to like that shit is crazy to me i'll never i'll never understand it i can't understand it but um i know why the freaks want to do the bad because they think that like oh this little young girl she's stupid and easily manipulative i have a friend who i know what they're trying to do who is very young in appearance and the way people come on to her makes me feel really uncomfortable because it's, I think Chris knows this person.

And it's, you think. And it makes me feel very uncomfortable because every time the person shows maturity, you go in a comment and you see a lot of people very angry about this person acknowledging that they are still an adult.

And I'm like, what the fuck is wrong? with people, dude. Yeah. Like, their whole ass profile like their mom and dad following them. And they just like, oh, ill, don't show that.

It's like... Hello, hello. I'm Malcolm Gladwell, host of Smart Talks with IBM. I recently spoke with IBM's new director of research, Jake Gambata. We discussed his vision

for the future of quantum computing. At IBM research, what we always do is answer what is the future of computing, whether it's coming up with new algorithms, coming up with better AI, coming up with quantum, or coming up with just how do different accelerators go together.

It's our DNA to answer the question of what is the future. Isn't it a perfect problem for IBM because you kind of need to have a legacy of building stuff? Yes. Building actual physical machines. Yeah, it's why I came to IBM. I wanted the experience, the culture of building hard things that others have not done before.

Where do you imagine we are in the timeline of this technology? There will come a point when it will mature. Right? My cell phone is a mature technology at this point. How far are we from that point with Kondo? By 2029, we'll build the first fault-tolerant quantum computer. That is one that can run a very, very large, large problem. To learn how IBM is building the future of computing,

visit IBM.com slash quantum. All right, quick quiz for the hiring managers out there. What's worse? Being understaffed or being poorly staffed? Well, that's a trick question because both are recipes for chaos. Either way, just say to yourself,

this is a job for indeed sponsored jobs. You'll get matched with candidates that meet the skills, certifications, and everything else you're looking for. Or go a different way and get no traction. Seriously, sponsored jobs posted direct on Indeed are 95% more likely to report a hire than non-sponsored jobs. It really is a no-brainer. Spend less time searching and more time actually interviewing candidates who check all your boxes.

Less stress, less time, more results. When you need the right person to cut through the chaos, this is a job for Indeed sponsored jobs. And listeners of this show will get a $75-sponsored job credit to help your job get the premium status it deserves at indeed.com slash podcast. Just go to Indeed.com slash podcast right now. Indeed.com slash podcast. Terms and conditions apply. Need to hire? This is a job for Indeed's sponsored jobs.

Don't show this person's a legal aged adult. I mean, it's definitely weird. Let me ask you guys something. That's weird. How do you guys feel about the school girl outfit like fetish or kink or whatever? How do you feel about that? I thought it was cool when I was 13. that I grew up

I got to tell you that there I I do so I totally understand the because I'm one of the people that I don't really see it as it's not anything I think I don't think of my wife like oh I wish you would go get like a schoolgirl outfit or whatever

because I that's not as a as a you know a guy in his 30s I don't care about school or anything like that doesn't excite me but I will say there's some people and I'm trying to just be fair I think there's some people that they just like the skimpiness of it. They are like that and it's not actually Oh yeah, just the fuck a. Yeah, just the,

there are obviously like schoolgirl uniforms that are like that they're made to specifically be like. Right. And it's not like borderline lingerie. Yeah. That's not really that traditional. Yeah, that's not that way to me. Catholic long skirt thing and you're like, oh man, I just, I wish you were a high school. I guess, but it is, I mean, I'm not trying to king shame.

I think it is overall, I am. I am. I am. I'm going to do that. Overall, it's a little bit weird to me just because. I feel like people want to do the role playing or something. And I'm not, I'm not really, personally I'm not,

I'm not into the, I can't be acting. I can't be acting. And look, look, man, I, I did it one time,

dude. If you want me to act, you better fucking pay, right? Because that's a fucking, that's a, I'm not, I'm not,

I'm not, I'm not here to fucking pretend to be a fucking teacher or something. Like, no. I didn't, I didn't like, someone, someone wanted to do that shit,

like act, do like a thing. I was in, I hated that. I was in a, I just played for a while and I stopped for a while. I'm sorry. That's rough.

I can't imagine that. That's the most dude. I know dudes that let that slime. I'm like, you deserve better than that. You deserve better than to before you get pussy. Got to get called the Edward like three times. Yeah.

That's pretty fucking. Everyone deserves better than that. Anything for pussy, man. It's like, bro, with really good, but it can't be that good dog.

She called you. N-word. You got to sit with that. You got to sit with being called the Edward with a hard dick, bro. What if she doesn't... What if you guys fuck up, but you guys don't finish that night?

You just got called the N-word like three times and sit there with a hard dick until the rest of the morning. I don't have you busted faster. He was, oh, like, you didn't even... He didn't even touch anything. Oh, dang, he falls asleep.

You're like, you're so disappointed. You're so disappointed. He came so hard. Which he called it. Edward. I fell asleep, instantly knocked out. You're still going to let it happen, though, because that was a good bust. We'll start

wrapping things. I'm fucking starving right now. I need to eat. I haven't eaten all day. And we still have the other episode to record later. So, let's wrap this baby up, but first I want to answer one question because Oh yeah, let's do it. This is just directed at me, but it's a quick one, and I just want to

get it off the list. She sells seashells by the seashore, and he sells seashells on the seafloor road. And he says, hello, Jen, simple question for you. Is Chris Raygun, named after the Reagan from Codz Zombies, do you enjoy the series? No. It has done to do with that. It literally just... I've explained this a couple times, so, like, I'm sure there are new people. I just didn't know what... I didn't want my last name to be part of my channel,

and so it was just Chris Raye for a while, but that felt like incomplete, and I just kept trying to find stuff to put after it, and Gunn was the only thing that worked, and that was what my name was when everything kind of started exploding, and I was like, well, I'm stuck here. I thought this was a Ronald Reagan, but I guess not. No, that's what a lot of people... Dude, a lot of people would say that. The unhinged fucking, like,

uh, like progressive people would, like they would always be like, he's fucking named after Reagan. I've never even considered that. Like, in that same? I'm kidding because I know you.

Like, I know you. So I'm kidding with the idea that people thought that. That was a real, that was a very, very real criticism that was living. And I was like,

it blew my mind because I was like, I'd never once thought of that ever in my fucking life. I just didn't want to be Chris Ray because that's not anything. Also, that was a baseball player, I'm pretty sure somewhere. And I was like, fuck.

And there's nothing that goes after, there's nothing else that you can put after that fucking name. It's it. Rayban. It's it. You're pretty much the Raybans. It makes them fucking sense. You should change it to Chris Gaygun during Pride Month, man. I did that.

You did? Oh. Yeah, I usually do that. I thought I was like, I came with this idea. I must have seen it and been like, oh, man, I'm going to tell him about that. And I fell asleep. I thought it was my own idea. No, I did that in like 2015, too.

Like when, when, like, because that was what people. People were calling me, and I was like, yeah, all right. Anyway. You know, Ronnie Reagan is kind of dope. That's a kind of thing. Yeah. We have, we have some, some bumper stickers on, on sacred symbols that have, because Colin Moriarty's last name is Moriarty in mine.

And we have, like, the same, like, Bush Reagan. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. And it says Moriarty Raygun on it. Nice. Pretty good. I like that. Anyway, let's, let's get on to reading these fucking names. I forgot we still don't have any new

Okay, all right, I'm gonna, okay, okay, okay, I'm both, okay, all right Yeah, yeah, all right, yeah, all right, let's, uh, let's, uh, let's read these names, uh, active, there we go, 25, all right, count me down. Three, two, one, Tom, uh, uh, there goes my, what? There goes my homo, watch him as, as he blows. Nice, very good. There goes my homo. Watch him as he blows. Nice.

So fucking stupid. Shama Lama Long Shlong. I'm 44 episodes behind and catching up quickly. This is a threat. Yanti. Walmartburg. N.D.C. 13. a cypher graph professional sink pisser

they should put a GoPro on EDP to show what happens to him the only snark tank patrons patrons to have both justifiably and verbally verifiably shot and killed not just one but two people his balls are sweaty these weak ars is heavy British ars is heavy nice

he's there's semen on his sweater already starfish spreading that's not bad that's not bad I like that the semen on a sweater already is one that I've already you know honestly Honestly, honestly, there's something there. That could be fucking one. Sploge yourself?

That's pretty, that's not fucking bad at all. That's not bad. The C minor sweat already is something that I say to myself, like, regularly, so it's already there for sure. That's pretty funny. That's pretty good, man. That's not bad. That's good.

We'll look into it. We'll put some R&D into that. Adolfo, the twink Lord of Come and Master of Manass. Sweeney, lick my weenie, Keith David, all their dicks are brown, all their dicks are brown, and this is, and this guy is gay, yeah, this guy is gay, I've sucked on a cock, I don't know what this is. I don't know what this one is. Sorry. Damn. Benjamin Aaron Shapiro. You imagine. Come in my ass, you're drilling me, drilling me. All I want is your ooze. I don't know what that is either. Damn, fuck, we're getting stumped. We're getting stumped here. Fucking denotes. Like, what's up, man? got to put the song you're parroting next to it eventually. Yeah, yeah. At the very least. I do like guessing it, but it were just, damn.

Whatever. I do like guessing in my ass. Coming in my ass. All the Dixie J. Auditxie J. All the Dix are brown. Oh, Dixieg. Coming in my ass.

Coming in my ass. Coming in my ass. Coming in my ass. That's the whole thing. That's so fucking good. That's awesome. I love that. All right.

Caucasian. the cracker barrel for gays, Keith David, tinfoil tyrant, because I'm a hex girl and I'm going to put my cum on you, putting black face on my like bulbs. Keith David raped my dragon. Max, silhouette, Sweenie, Sweeney, Sweeney, Sweeney, Swallow up my

Piny, bend my dick, come in or snatch, sings and the signs, and the signs some cock were written on the bathroom stalls, dick and balls. She pipkin on my pippa, possum, yes, that's probably my real name. I tried the BW. Oh, I tried the Buffalo Wildwing cheese curds,

and they're just okay. No, man, you gotta try them with caramel. You're missing, you miss the whole fucking point. You miss the entire point. You gotta put, you gotta ask them for the caramel dip.

Trust me. No climb up a tree and fall out of it. I mean, that's unreal. That's pretty mean. The man's, the man who's outside your window,

I'm not using, I'm not using stilts. I'm just that tall. Average clit energy. That's really scary, actually. You're on the fifth floor. You look at you when those guy

walks past their window. Dude, I used to have this really, I used to have this insane fear. I used to have this insane fear of like looking out my window on my fifth story apartment in Yonkers and just seeing a guy's shadow. Like a person's shadow. Because the very idea of that is so mind-bendingly scary that I was just like I can't. I would shut my windows like I would close the blinds or put the curtains up just so I didn't have a chance of seeing it.

Yeah. If I was like, if I lived like the fifth floor and I said somebody outside my window, I would push them. them. So they hit the floor, they're doomed. Like falling down like that. They got that much arc. They hit the ground where your head touches the floor. Shit's blowing up, man. Shit, dude.

I'm a black belt and hate speech. Damn. I wrote in. Very cool. He didn't write in. I'm reading the names. I'm sorry. I'm getting fucking.

I'm so hungry. I'm delirious. Star Coffee, a mob of cock, goblin, goblin, goblin, mob. There's Robin Robin Williams Grave. Ghal and Smeagel arguing over what are the say of the N-word. Transframed Gremlin exposing people with lactose intolerance and 90 million rodogens of ionizing radiation. Yush, not Vin-Pen. The Angelic Dungeon Master presents Game of Thrones Special Victims Unit.

Yeah, yeah. Craig the Canadian. Richard Fisting declares that Craig the Canadian is dead. Parentheses, maybe. It's your boy, Shawnee D. 9-112. This time, it's personal. Stupid. I can't believe

Did you, by the way, I know this is like tangential to anything that we care about really on this show, but did you see, because even I know about this, that's how I know it's a big deal. Do you see what happened to the Jets? Hello, hello, I'm Malcolm Gladwell, host of Smart Talks with IBM. I recently spoke with IBM's new director of research, Jake Gambatta. We discussed his vision for the future

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Building actual physical machines. Yeah, it's why I came to IBM. I wanted the experience, the culture of building high. hard things that others have not done before. Where do you imagine we are in the timeline of this technology? There will come a point when it will mature. Right? My cell phone is a mature technology at this point.

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Indeed.com slash podcast. Terms and conditions apply. Need to hire? This is a job for Indeed's sponsored jobs. Oh, yeah, yeah. That's so fucking crazy. So Aaron Rogers, who's this, like, big star quarterback that they got, like, he played for, the Jets have sucked for a really, really long time.

So the fact that they got this guy and there, like, there was like a lot of hope. It was like, oh, man, the Jets are going to do well this year because they got Aaron Rogers. And, like, I think in like the first. I don't know if it was the first player Four plays in He tore the Achilles He tore his tending

And he's just out for the rest of the year And he's so He's so old Who knows if he's even gonna come back after this? Yeah he might not play again And I know that like Look we're not sports people I'm not a sports person at all

But the fact that I know this at all Is it isn't Colin a fucking Chris fan It's Colin It's Colin And so people But like it wasn't even because of Colin necessarily It's because people were coming into my chat

I was screaming Starfield Yeah And saying, check on Colin, make sure he's okay. Make sure he's okay. So I literally thought about that. I was like, I wonder what Colin thinks right now. Dude, it is crazy. He's like on the floor all just in a fetal position.

Dude, we did, we did a secret with just us because Dustin's in Japan. And he was like, we spent 30 minutes talking about it. And he was like, the blunt answer, the blunt answer is like, people were asking me how I am. I was like, I'm not okay. And I felt bad for laughing, but it was just so, it was. so funny to hear that since I was in high school. They were like high. They haven't been,

I was not, I was not, since the fucking 60s, man, bro. They, they were, no,

they were pretty decent. They were pretty decent. They are not, 2012. They were not, 2011, you're thinking. Decent's not good enough,

man. They want a fucking chip. They made it, they made it to the end of their, their conference. They were almost decent. And then they fucking lost. They need a championship,

brother. Anyway, the point is that, like, it's such a crazy thing to happen. It's so unlucky. Like, the Jets are cursed.

Crazy. What's even crazier about it to me is that not only did it happen to the Jets, but it happened to the Jets on 9-11, which is amazing. New York's this unlucky day, man. Like, New York Jets and 9-11 do not fucking mix, man. That's the second time. Damn. That's the second fucking time.

How nutty is that? How fucking, that's cosmic shit. I was telling Con, it's like, you couldn't write this. and have it be believable. That is freaking. Like, it wouldn't be believable if this happened. Yeah. You'd be like, that's so shitty writing.

Like, why would you do that? Has it been 20 years since? One of Aaron Rogers' towers. Yeah, the twin... Yeah, the twin tower. The first... His legs of the twin towers and the first tower went down.

Oh, poor Aaron, man. I like that. Yeah, honestly, dude, he must be... I forgot. I used to like him, but then he... He was like, ugh. He became one of those anti-vax freaks freaks freaks. And he started going on, like, on the, just doing, like, podcast and shit,

being like, he was, oh. Maybe that's why he's Achilles tendon tour. That's crazy. I'm not getting my Achilles vex, uh, uh, uh, Achilles medicine. I'm not getting my Achilles backs. Dude, it's so funny. Imagine getting a plane. Imagine getting a call, like, uh, a tear has hit.

Uh, a tear has hit Aaron Rogers, Achilles tendon. A tear has hit. Oh, that's so great. Oh, fuck. All right. I totally forgot to touch on that because it's like so, so, you know. But it did happen. It was like one of the big things that actually did happen.

That's so unfortunate. Yeah. Yeah. Best wishes to, uh, Colin. Yeah, yeah, that's really,

I only feel bad for Colin. I don't really feel bad for Aaron. That guy's a fucking infinity billionaire. Who gives a fuck? Yeah, he'll be fine. And also, I didn't know he was anti-vax.

I feel significantly less bad for him. Yeah, yeah, I forgot about it too, right? I started thinking about his character. I was like, he's a piece of shit.

Yeah. He probably thought he was fine. He's probably like, oh, I'm old, but like, whatever. I fucking, I take this homeopathic medicine and, like, fucking he cares. Yeah, he probably got COVID, like, 20 times. Yeah, he got COVID 80 times. It weakened his fucking legs. Imagine it in COVID so many times your legs are weaker.

Like, you're, like, fucking rubble. And they're like, sir, please stop getting COVID. Stop getting this. I'm fine. I'm still alive. My legs are fucking weak. Bread tastes like soil and water tastes like red, but, like, whatever. Like, I'm fine.

Let me throw you the fucking ball. Yeah. Is there, like, training footage of him? Or, like, he's, like, fucking, like, noodles and shit. He's like, I'm good. I'm good. He's, like, a wacky, waving, inflatable arm flailing tube, man. Okay, let's stop.

The next day, let's go. He's whaling around, like, a fucking wacking waving inflatable arm flailing tube, man. That's awesome. Put me in the game. He looks like Reed Richards, bro. His fucking body's all sorts of silly, bro. It's better than crudely painted. Not so funny plight would cut out folk art.

That'd be worse. All right, Matt Walsh is a hero of our time to be banging for life. Ben and Jerry's Funky Monkey, Indie Butterknife on YouTube. Ben and Jerry, I remember as it reminds me I have ice cream in my freezer and I haven't even opened it. I've had it for like weeks.

How is this ice cream? Ice cream's fine for a long time, right? I assume. Unless it starts getting freezer burn, it's good. I mean, but freezer burn's not that big of deal, is it? It just makes it taste not good. Yeah, all right, yeah. I'll probably fucking, I don't know.

I got it, I don't know. I don't know why I bought it. It'll take a long time. Fuck, I love ice cream. That's my fucking problem. I like it, but it fucks my stomach up. I like it less than I was held with Lily. It's my sugar, maybe?

I think so. I think it's a sugar thing more than anything. Because I already kind of like, I'm already drinking so much tea with sugar in it already. Gotcha. But, uh, all right, Indie Butter Nife on YouTube. I reckon if the flash rapidly tensed and untensed his dick in bitches, in a bitch's mouth, it would sound like a fleshy rattlesnick.

That is. That is crazy. Because that implies that there's like a loose kind of, like almost like in like a spray can. That is the craziest thing I've ever heard in my life. Rapidly tensed and untensed. You can only tense your dick so fast. One every, like one tense every two seconds, I would imagine, right? That's true.

We can tense it faster. That's true. A faster person. Yeah. 3XO buying Racon's in 2020 and them shocking my. year and ceasing function shortly after the warranty expired. What? Damn.

That's so crazy. I've had my recons for years. I don't even say that it's like, I don't even say that it's like a sponsor. Like I get that, like, they help me a lot. But like, I mean, just genuinely, like, I don't know. They've been fine for me. Yeah, same. Slurping stroke and smoke and joking.

Emoticon's going like this morning outlet, Keith David. My name is Pinguis Parker. I was bitten by a radioactive dinner. And for over 15 years, I've been YouTube poop man. Pingus! Dinner. A little fucking YouTube To the tune of Hey Jude

By the Beatles Hey dude Come over here Get on your knees And suck my penis It's so That's not bad I would have

It could be workshopped a little bit Yeah Yeah yeah There's something there for sure There is something I like that Hey Jude would be a guy Hey hey dude Blood fuck dudes in the dead of night

We go ahead, go ahead Oh, we won't you blow me Keith David Uh, guys, a lot of Keith David's like spread out Guy, Abby, to the tune of To the tune of killing in the name of

What, Sucking and I'm Gay, ugh, I don't know, I know about that. I don't know about that There's more to that And then there's that

string of hieroglyphics That I couldn't pronounce Oh yeah, I'm sorry, man, Like a prayer Oh yeah, that you transnational, That's right. I forgot.

It was something like a law bar or something I remember. Yeah, something like that. Yeah. Something funny and topical. Wage Slay 583. I feel gay fuck you. The Pupini Brothers Emporium tries to get Vichita to say, I swallow come on stream. Nice.

Donk, Doncerson, quiet, quitten, and quefe and queer. Keith David, William, William Harrington. Let's get down to Bussy to defeat these buns. Let's get down to Bucy. Said it on back. That'd be fun of it. Did they send me penis? When I asked for come, you're the saddest talk I've ever seen.

That's not bad. All right, so look, we've got a couple. We've got a couple here. And indeed, this week is true. I swear I will stop coming inside of you. Yeah, hold on. Let me write these down so you don't forget. Fuck up ass or fuck a man.

You must be thick as a... Fuck-oh, man. Fuck a man. Fuck a man's good, man. That's good. Must be thick as a coursing and work. No. Oh, let's realize.

I hate that that rhymes and it works for a-offing and in the C-word. Yeah, yeah. All right. Fuck a man. Moulon gay son. There was another one that was a... The idea of being gay. Hey, dude.

Hey, Jude gay. Hey, dude, gay. I'm just taking notes. Hey, dude, gay. Hey, gay jude. Prythes, gay. You must be thinking, keep getting bigger. Fuck on.

Oh, man. Sides with Coom. I love the fuck a man. Just with all these dudes. Fuck on. And everyone saying that Everybody's watching you fuck this other dude The whole entire group

Is watching you fuck the other dude Everybody's saying that is That is really good I hate how good that is Yeah And it just makes sense too Because Shang was like all into fucking ping You know so it makes sense

Shane was a little sweet Shit out of dude Mulan All right As soon as he found out He was a girl He was like yo I'm gay And I'm fine with it He was like I'm fine with it

Not a furry I don't want you Mulan Not a furry I just I just want to fuck a woman combat a mean lesbian John Strickland armored whole sex fires of fires of rubbing cocks so dumb um Merck's 1889 I'm such a I'm such a dog I bite at the fart bubbles in the bath oh my god I know that quote I know what that's from there's this so there's this video of this guy with like this there's this video of this

old guy with like a painted on hairline with like printer ink and he's just saying all this fucking all this insane shit that is the most subhuman thing I've ever heard in my life that is the most almost person they ever heard of my life

I've seen it on TikTok every now and again it's just some guy just like I don't know if I can find it you got to send me that if you find it you got to send me that it's the most unhinged like Farts in a back of the bite at it.

Like a dog. It's like, what is wrong with you? That's not even the most insane shit that he says in that video. That's like on the lower end of just it's so fucking mind. I mean, he's like, I'm, I can't even replicate it.

There's no way. But I'll send it to you immediately after this episode. Because I'll be able to find. If I'm such a dog, I bite at the fart bubbles in the bad, dude. That's crazy. The first church of Keith David featuring the unholy choir consisting of six unique and slightly altered clones of Keith David. The universe where Peter Parker is a Klansman.

Pre-Raz, Blake 896, Gay Jonah Gammison, Chief Editor of the Galey Bugle. Cop shoots a Pomeranian out of fear that Dick is bigger than his. Alaskan oil field trash. Texas Tater Salad, peanut butter and cummy sandwich. Sue Hulk. Tickle My Ass hairs. Nicky Ziggie. Marcus's pronouns are he.

him and doms are was was word that's pretty good jfk's head uh was on it was an iED uh every every time i come it sounds like squidward walking jackson d badly brave hugger derrick bulk first disciple of fitness of the fitness nice that's a destiny thing uh ethereum perjurian hunter

melvis one hexblade warlock supremacist and as always running out our list King of Hephazard. Thank you so much. This has been fucking redial. The episode started off a little slow and got more and more insane as it went on. Yeah.

Oh, here, yeah. I thought, I'm a dog. And the fart bubbles into bath. We smoke in symbiote. We smoke in that Whoopi Goldberg,

South Egyptian Furburger, Deluxe mega million scraps. You gotta send me this. You have to send me this. It is, it is. It is,

it is, So it's called, the only caption that's on this is Dracula Flow. I don't know. So, like, I'm sure if you Google,

if anybody's listening and you Google, Dracula Flow, maybe you'll find it. But it's, it's just this guy with this fake painted on hairline with, like, printer ink,

with shades, saying this fucking obnoxious shit. It's the first thing that popped up when I, yeah, it's, it's, Dracula. If you look of Dracula,

is the first thing. His hair is crazy. This is madness. This is madness. It's to the point where I almost want to do what he's doing. I want to smoke his weeds so bad. I'm going to smoke his weed so bad. Okay, we're leaving now.

Bye. We're leaving. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, my God. Something crazy just happened, but, like, I'll save it. I'll tell off screen. Okay. That's kind of nuts.

Also, also, just quickly, just quickly. Are you guys still recording? Yeah. I am. Yeah. Sweeney was right about the on-air. I just wanted to fuck with him. Yeah.

I knew you were gaslighting him when I was going to all that. I should play along too. You guys both suck massive dick. Yeah, so I saw the little onions sitting on top of the I ain't going to say shit. Of course. You didn't know. You guys couldn't break me. I saw it.

I saw it too and I was like, that's just a purple part of the fucking tomato. What are you talking about? All right, let's go. We get the fuck out of here. Want to earn extra income for your business? Amazon Hub Delivery is looking for ambitious business owners to assist with local deliveries. When you become a partner, you and your staff will deliver packages to customers in your area on a schedule that works for you. With each package delivered, you'll gain extra income and exposure for your business.

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