The Snark Tank - #179: Cory in Hamas

Episode Date: October 13, 2023

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What about a Corey and Hamas? What about that? You think that would... You think that would... Derek, shut the fucking... You know about Corey and Hamas? You think that will solve the... You think he could talk to you a...

Glory, Corey, Corey, Corey. Somebody get Kyle Massey on the phone. I am gay. Ooh, I'm pretty gay. I'm gay. I'm gay. I'm gay. I'm really homo

I'm pretty gay I guess we're not leading I guess we're not leading with that previous cold open How's it? How's it going? How's it going everybody? Welcome to the Snark Tank podcast. Welcome, welcome, welcome.

If you're, if you, I got to remember to do this because I forget for several episodes at a time if you want to support the show and get early ad-free access to every episode Patreon.com slash a snark tank. I hate to do it early in the show. but I got to get it out of the way so we can

so we can peruse all the topics for today and honestly you know there's not not really Ouskeeping Ouskeeping there's not Oh yeah by the way

I should I feel like this is something I should mention outside of the fact that we outside of the fact that we did do a Jack's films episode which should be live by the time you definitely by the time you hear this yeah

we also did an extra ammo a deep a deep deep dive on the JF Garripe let's call it pre true crime story

it's very interesting but it's also Meg I don't know how many people in the audience even know who this guy is I assume some people do but like he was pretty niche even he was pretty niche even back then so like if you're interested in that and you should be because that story is wild going over to the Patreon

You can listen to that. But outside of that, man, there's really nothing going on in the world at all. No news. No, whatsoever. No breaking news. No breaking news. Nothing, nothing. Nothing tragic.

Nothing tragic. Nothing on Twitter at all. No. You know, no live week. No conflict. Yeah, no conflict at all. No conflicts. No conflicts.

conflict, but if there was conflict, I would definitely want to know, you know, what ex-QC would say about it. I definitely would want to know what Rebecca, what, what, what does Rebecca Black have to say? What does Israel-Palestine? What does Kaisnett take? Yeah, what does Kaisnett's take? I feel like he doesn't even know Palestine's a real place. Do you think he has a take? I think he

Do you think he actually No way There's no fucking way I'm gonna look up every Every streamer I'm gonna see What is every streamer What is every streamer?

Look at You Google that You Google what do What does every streamer think about Israel and Palestine? EDP's take On the fucking Can you imagine

EDP EDP has a very reasonable take too It's like very reasonable It's extremely reasonable but then like there's clearly like some fucking girl tied up in the background. It's just like you can't even focus on what he's saying because clearly there is something horrible is happening. That he finally, he finally after 10 times of being fooled, he finally got one.

He kept trying. Oh man. This poor guy just wants to give his opinion on the Israel-Palestine conflict and he's, he's getting swindled out of his cupcakes Yeah Or what if like What if what if So the person that he actually captured

Was another decoy He just actually successfully You know Captured the decoy And this is pleading That like please this was this was a joke This was another This was another

I got paid by a streamer Please let me go And he's like I can't believe that was his excuse I don't I don't I don't even know what to believe anymore. It seems to...

Was it something... Wait, did they reveal the... Did the Gideon video finally come out? And he said, that's what he said in it? I actually don't know. Well, I never... I was looking at up at the time and nothing was out. And then the weird thing is I've heard nobody react to it.

So now I'm even wondering, did something officially come out? I actually don't know. I feel like that's way more important than whatever's going out in the Middle East. Yeah, 100%. 100%. You know? Like, what's the EDP's story? Yeah.

What does EDP think about this? Not right. What do you think about this? I will listen. Jidian will not upload the catch video. What's the point then? Yeah, I wonder why he says that. But there is a, oh, it's a two-minute explanation, I guess, of him saying why.

But I'm still not even interested in watching that because. Yeah, that's not a good reason. Whatever reason you have is dumb. That's, like, that's, that's, that's, that's fucking cinema that's sitting behind. It almost is... Behind in some fucking random guy's computer and you're just not going to unleash it. First of all, you're going to tease it.

Right. And then not release it. And then not do it. Fuck. What is the reasoning? Life seems so not real at this point to me. Where I keep feeling... I've said this multiple times on the podcast,

but I feel that we are in some sort of matrix style simulation. And the thing about simulations that they're supposed to be simulated supposed to be realistic, at least as much as possible. And what it feels like is happening is, and I think I've said this before, that maybe our overlords, they spilled, whoever's watching the servers, spilled some fucking soda on them or something. And their real time, like, dude's cleaning it up right now and it needs some quick repairs, which is probably going to take like 30 minutes, but 30 minutes of them is hundreds

of years. Who knows how much time it is. So the thing is that just seems so weird to me is there are things that are happening that seems like they should be so impossible, especially like the stupidity of people. When you think about things that you keep discovering, like it's impossible someone should be this dumb when, I don't know, man, like all the size of our brains.

And that's why I've been so fascinated with, say, the JF thing. Yeah. Because of, I don't understand how this person doesn't see how guilty he appears to be, Even let's just say for the sake of argument, let's just say he did not murder his girlfriend. Let's say he allegedly did not kill anybody. Yeah, let's just say alleged, like he didn't do any. He did exactly what he said. He just dropped her off.

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Our best lineup is here at Lowe's. Valor 327. Selection varies by location. Raw supplies last. He likes to get around with mentally handicapped women. Women. One of them had the mind of like an 11 or 12 year old. that he tried to impregnate, blah, blah, blah.

He has, I think, dual citizenship. He's a French-Canadian, and I think he's studied. He got a degree, I think, possibly a PhD in the United States. So he's, like, smart in a field. He's admitted, and I don't know if he was being jokingly or not, but he said he's autistic. So maybe he is. For certain. He seems like he is.

He seems like he is. The only reason why I say I wasn't sure. What is time, time, my, time, what is autism signs exactly? Well, there's, what do you think? So besides the internet signs, like there's, you know, Sonic and then chronic use of the internet, besides those two things, like the real thing is, I feel like that most people. Because the thing for me is that. Okay. Yeah, I guess it's his turn.

I'm sorry, sorry, I try to interrupt you. I like Sonic, right? I like Sonic, right? But I never looked up Sonic on the internet, right? And I think that's what spared me. That's all what spared me from it. Do you think exposure to Sonic makes people autistic, actually? Yes, 100%.

That is true. That is true. That is true. That is true. That is, yeah, an impactable. That is empirical evidence that has been studied for since Sonic actually came out. Yeah, yeah. Yeah.

So that is. That's why that's why conflict is. They don't have Sonic. over there. And so they don't have anything to obsess over that isn't like, you know, genuine, like, religious squabbles over Holy Lands. So, you know, they don't have Sonic. You're right.

And they would be a lot better off with Sonic. They would be a lot more chill. No, they would not. They would be way more dangerous. You know how there's, uh, uh, missionaries that go over and try to spread the word of their respective religion or whatever. I feel like we probably need a Sonic missionaries? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Nah, man. Teespread. Hello, have you heard of the one and only true blue edge og? Sonic. Sonic. I don't think that's an example, man. Edge og. These fucking dudes all dressed up like, fucking, you know, in their ninja gear with guns.

They're like, what is this Sonic? What the? Ninja gear. What are you? I mean, let's be real. Let's be real. where else, where did they, what is the, what is the, when you look at the, should I even, you know, we don't need to say that specific terrorist organization.

We don't need to say their name. But when you see terrorist organizations from that region, what do you think their, what is the inspiration for their gear from their ensemble? I mean, I thought it was based on Aladdin. It's based on the clothes they wear and the area they're in. You guys are cunts. Holy shit, dude. I'm sorry.

I'm sorry. What the hell we're talking about? You guys are cunt. Oh my God. This is this is an absolute we are merging so many things together right now. I've said some fuck shit Derek

and Chris. Like I've said fuck shit on this podcast but that was just so I'm not Middle Eastern even remotely slightly at all and I am not offense to that a little bit. All right.

All right. So all right. That's crazy. So it wasn't Aladdin. I'm sorry. That's crazy. I mean, Jafar? I mean,

what makes it funny is that these is like one of the good people you don't make fun of like that because they get active. My favorite thing about it, my favorite thing about it is the idea that like, the idea that an entire religion would see, would see a movie and be like,

oh, let's do that. Like the order is reversed. We're going to need a fact check that because the thing is, and what I mean by that, I believe you. Do we need to fact check whether or not the Islamic religion came before or after Aladdin? Yeah, so what I want to do is see, I want people, I want you to look at people in the certain region that have engaged in those type of acts, but pre-Aladdin. I want people to look at pictures of these people and then look at pictures after Aladdin and see, let's bear it. Could you imagine you literally could improve terrorism before Aladdin? Like, you couldn't prove there was like, you go back and you cannot catalog terrorism before Aladdin.

Like terrorism superseded Aladdin, like, they made Aladdin. I guarantee you. And afterwards, terrorism came into me. If you look up the Mujahideen, right? The Mujahideen were technically warriors to, I think they were to disrupt Russia to, I think they helped fight Georgia. If I'm getting this wrong, please correct me. I don't really give a shit. That's not the point of this.

I'm just saying the Mujahideen, apparently the Mujahideen parts of it, bin Laden, one of them, turned into, right? We know what they turned into. Now, I ask you, when was the date that bin Laden was officially labeled as a terrorist?

Christmas. It was the date after Aladdin dropped. The day after. Aladdin's Eve. Could you imagine, could you imagine a day? The day before they're wearing

Levi's and like Adidas regular like just regular T-shirts, some freaking like some fucking Dickie's T-shirts the next day they're dressed like they're going to slumber parties. Did you imagine? I'm like that's like that slumber party.

Oh man. I love this so much. You know I love this so fucking much because of how like if you if you log on to the internet right now, on a Twitter or something right now. And it doesn't matter what side you take or any type of, it does not matter. People are up fucking set.

People are upset. Yeah, yeah. And I just love that we. It's all jokes. It's all jokes. We're having, we're, we're having fun here. We're not trying to round nobody up. It's just, it's just, the internet's so annoying right now.

People, people don't really, a lot of people who don't know enough about the situation are talking a lot about it. Yes. And I think we kind of are self-aware enough to know that we don't really know enough to talk about this shit in a serious capacity. What the fuck? Why would you want to hear our take on the fucking Israel-Palesson conflict? Exactly that.

That is the sound of the world. We are not valuable voices at all. We can't change it. Oh, can you imagine if, can you imagine if all of the strife and conflict in the Middle East, if there was a headline that said, oh, it was resolved because this really good episode of the Snark Tank podcast, just really, it just really like, first of all,

that would look really embarrassing for them. that it took that it took this to solve that whole thing but no we gotta do it's just fucking absurd we all gotta wear he jobs man we got where he jobs one episode

no what we gotta do that's crazy that's taking a stance so what we got to do is where he jobs and a yamaica over it I mean I have a he job so I don't we get Bradley Cooper from that movie to make an appearance I have a job on deck

so whenever you guys ready I'm not going to wear my job is black and gold is beautiful noses combined never one thing I will say one thing I will say wow Why not?

Look, I don't know. I'll say this. I'm not, I, you're an expert. I need to know, if I'm going to fight to death for some place, there better be a Chili's. There better be a Chili's in that region.

Because I'm not going to, I'm not going to war for no chili list. What are you talking about? Chili's is the absolute highest tier of mid-quality food. If you don't have chilies, you have, yes, it's absolutely is. Let me tell you this. Let me tell you this. Chili, Chili is a tier mid.

Let's not. Let me tell you this, Sweeney. Let me tell you this. You're crazy. You're crazy. Listen, listen. Listen. No, this is no better myth than Chili's.

Do you guys remember in the summer when the pandemic was lifted for like a week or two or something? Do you guys remember that? Yeah, I do remember that. Yeah. I do remember that. Everything shut down again. So there was that brief moment where we legitimately thought it was over. Do you know where me and a ton of people went to go celebrate?

Right? Chilies. Chilies. We were singing songs. Because you guys have chimp taste buds. They were saying the low tier taste buds. We were singing the chili song. We were singing you like raising Keynes chicken unironically. Shut the fuck up.

It's not bad. It's not my favorite. That is not my favorite chicken. It is not my favorite chicken. It is not my favorite chicken. That's like awesome. I'd rather cook my chicken. Like pepper hurts their fucking tongue kind of chicken.

You might as well be eating boiled white out. if you're going to be fucking eating Raising Cains. The fact that you're saying Chili's made is like that's giving Chilis so much respect You're crazy

Dude The Chili's actually Chicken strips are actually kind of good brother No they're not Stop Stop They're

They're They're all better than Raising Cains I'll tell you that A million percent A million percent Bro No

Everything everything Everything Cain has no fucking flavor dude If their flavor It's all in their stupid fucking sauce But chilies Just tastes like bread

Their nuggets Their chicken chips tastes like bread No It tastes like bread It tastes like croutons Niggins, what are you talking about? That's what Raising Cains tastes like.

That's what I'm like, I'm tripping it. Raising Cains has barely, it doesn't have much flavor. I give it that. I can't put a pull. Wait, no, I can't put a pull up because I don't think there's enough people that have had the chicken from chilies because it's not their stable, right?

It's all about their fucking ribs. They don't like, but don't eat in poison, that's why. Oh, yeah, it's? Dude, the chilies baby back ribs? They're really not that good, bro. They're pretty good. It's not like, it's not like, It's not like a real barbecue, but it's better than, yeah, it's, it's better than not having ribs.

I don't know. What's the top tier of mid? I would guess, make, like, Chili's is actually a great fucking answer. I would say Olive Garden. You're fucking out of your mind. First of all. First of all, like, that is, that's kind of, if, are we talking about, like, American food or are we talking about? Because.

The top tier of, like, made restaurants. There's not enough. Because olive garden. That's too broad. when I'm talking about when I'm talking about when I'm talking about when I'm talking about like Applebee's Yeah like American dinies

You know fucking like these types of places TGI Fridays Like these types of these establishments You cannot tell me that Chili's is not the king of those establishments I got out back Outback No not

No Albaing is Australian technically Yeah I was also It's also very American food But like It is It's Australian technically. It's American. No Australian would go to Outback and be like, oh, yeah.

Let me get a three born to Bobby. I can't you. Remember, though. Remember what I said. And I feel like it must be a curiosity thing where I went to the French restaurant and then there was a fucking French family celebrating their birthday. And I did, look, why are you here? Get the fuck out of you.

If that was a good French restaurant, they probably wanted French food. Maybe it is actually a really good restaurant. And I would imagine. I don't know. Because Jamaicans go to Jamaican food spots. Like we do that I would imagine it's more out of curiosity though isn't it

That's what I feel like That's kind of how I feel like Like when I go to pizza places out here When I'm like I'm curious I have no expectation that it's gonna be good But I gotta know And I'm yeah It's never

Right Really that is a piece out here That's one good place out here I stand by I stand by Prime Prime is very good Prime's not bad Prime's very good

Prime is almost It's Joe's at the top And then it's and then it's prime But like yeah How much you ought to have Rockles out here I really want, yeah. We go out to,

when we go out to Vegas, I want to try it. Very good. I like, I like it. I was very good. I think these nigs will like this shit. I'm not,

I'm not like one of the annals about pizza. I think, I don't even complain. It's like complaining about like living in, it's like complaining about living in like an inner city and like there's nowhere to play baseball. It's like, well, yeah, there's buildings and conquer everywhere.

You're not going to be able to play baseball. Like I don't, I don't cry about it anymore. I'm like, whatever. When I go to New York, I enjoy my pizza on New York. No one's crying about it. It's just like true.

It's just like, yeah, okay. I stopped expecting anything out of it. Because I don't know, man. I've grown. I like, I think that bothers me is that people will like come up to me and like up to my face and be like, dude, I know you hate pizza out here, but you got to check this place out. I had this guy yesterday come up to me and giving me advice. He was like, oh, yeah, man, you got to go to big Knicks, big Knicks Pizzeria in San Pedro. Because I was taking my parents down there to see a bunch of, uh, you know, uh, you're

a bunch of stuff. And I was like, okay, fine, sure. I'll give this place a try. And it was good, I guess, but it was good. It was like if Papa John's cared to make a good pizza. You know what I mean? It was that kind of pizza done really well. And that's good.

Great for you. But that's not what I'm looking for. I'm looking for the long, thin, crispy fucking slice. Right. Which is fine. I can find that. Finally, after many years out here, I found Prime and Joe's and that's fine. I'm good.

It's all relatively far away, but I can deal with that. Just don't come up to me and tell me At all How close is Prime to us? How close is Prime to you? Prime is like 10 minutes away from where I live What's the address? Oh, the address of it?

Or where I live Of Prime. Which one? Which one? What's the latitude and longitude? Oh, bad. How many seconds? You almost got them.

I almost got them. I almost docks himself on camera. Yeah. Hold on guys. I want to update you. Guys, I want to update you a little bit. I have guns now, so I would like, go ahead. Show up, please.

Please show up. Oh, man. A Californian with some guns. Damn. That's exciting. I know how to finally kill myself. Scare me, please. Scare me, frighten me. Please.

If I showed up at your house, if I showed up at your house dressed in full clown attire while you were asleep and jumped on your bed and started giggling like a madman, would you be able to kill me, like, quicker than you would be able to tell it was me? I don't know. That's scared. That's a really scary place to be in, you know? Where, like, you react and you kill somebody, like, oh, my God, God gave it. It's like that punk.

It's like that punked episode where Zach Braff beat up that little boy. He started, like, shaking him like a fucking baby. He was like, you're a little fucking shit. I was like, oh, man, he's going to kill him. He was handling, like, he was handling that kid like a little monkey handles like a rabbit. You know what's crazy? Just complete disregard. You know what's crazy, though?

I've also seen monkeys be way gentler with other things. I've seen this dichotomy of monkey, you know? I think the thing is it's like they don't know what anything is because they're stupid, primitive, useless animals. And so they'll oftentimes cycle between like completely reasonless gentleness and completely reasonless just brutality. Like I've seen monkeys treat dogs like pets. and I'm like, huh? I've also seen a monkey hit a dog with a rock like eight times, like in the stomach and I'm like,

I'm like, what is going on? Yeah, it's like, they're confusing. I don't like monkeys really. I've seen monkeys drag kids up and let go of them. I'm like, why did you do that? Like, why did you do that? That monkey that steals the baby off the moped is one of my favorite videos ever. What was he going to do with that kid?

What was he going to do? He was going to sell him on the little, the little monkey black market. The little monkey black market. Yeah, the monkey black. It's that. Exactly that. One monkey puts a baby on a table.

Like how much? What? That's crazy. A human? I don't know. You're a man cub? It's probably there. You don't know.

Don't act like it ain't there. I can't stand monkeys, dude. Being around monkeys for at least a little bit makes you really hate them. Yeah. They're terrible. They're terrible creatures. I don't recall ever being around a monkey. Yeah, you do.

But you don't want to say it. But. Yeah. Yeah, you do. Yeah. I'm trying to hide my monkey. You know what? I've actually seen,

now that I think about it, because I'm sure I've seen one of those, it's so funny because this is like a, this feels like a fictional thing, but I swear to God I've seen in real life. Those guys with the accordions and the little monkey

on like the unicycle, I swear to God I've seen that in person. I know that feels like a relic. from like in cartoons from like a million fucking years ago but I swear to God I saw a monkey like a tiny little monkey in a vest in at least 2003

I think I'm pretty confident with like a little music box I mean I could be like the last one the last one yeah yeah he was the last one the final the final monkey it should make that movie it's like the last of the Mohicans

but like with the last of one of these guys That's exactly what I was thinking of. I've seen monkeys in the Caribbean. I went to, like, seeing kids one time, and a monkey, like, attacked my grandma. My grandmother hit it with a frying pan and threw it out. And I was like, yo. That's crazy. Frying pans are amazing weapons, by the way.

Lefforda two taught me that. The sound. I saw the old guy beat the shit of a crocodile with one. That fat dude was that picture, that Portly fellow? No, not that, not that shit. No, he doesn't even have a fucking frying pad. Exactly. He's raw.

What is up with that? that shit, man. He was eating with the friolig. I said friagin, almost like a Pokemon. It's crazy. But he was eating with it. Then I guess an argument broke up between him and it, and he showed it who's boss. I'm, who? Like, how did, how can, I'm sure this is AI.

How did this come about? What are you talking about? So, have you seen any of those photos of that big black dude, big belly? He's got cargo, uh, camo shouts. shorts on and he has a box of pizza and he's fighting aligators he's fighting gators with one of them it's definitely AI it's like

but it's it's it became like huge to the point there's so many scenarios of them now the last picture I saw of them was the gator and that dude shaking hands they put their differences aside I saw that one too yeah that's the first one I saw yeah they're like all right there's enough of this we're gonna do it more

they can't I like that you said show He put out his little show Shouts. It's It's, It's, it's, it's, AI's getting pretty funny.

Have you seen, I don't know if this is true. People were saying that you can no longer Because a Bing uses a specific AI And so people are actually starting to use Bing now And people were, for whatever reason, they were putting Drake in multiple scenarios

To the point where I guess you can't do that anymore. Yeah, they banned, they banned Drake as a, as a prompt. I saw so many. I saw him running from like a chupacabra in the woods. And then I saw him like... That is so bananas. And then I saw, I saw something about like him being like this Akira type blob.

I didn't see that. You see that? I've seen a lot of them, though. My two favorites, one I just posted were he's eating some like, you know, AI chicken nuggets. They look like chicken McNuggets. And he is hysterically crying. It is so fucking funny.

I saw that one. I just posted that one. I saw that. Did you see the one that wang posted? No. It's fucking, it's a little Asian girl crying on the street. And Drake is bent down next to her making the fucking racist eyes. He's pulling is on that one.

I did see that one. I did see that. I did not see that one at all. Jesus Christ. It's so the amount of things that people were doing, I'm like, okay, I get why they banded. I can't. Now they're just going to latch on to somebody else. Dude, there's a lot of weird, like, look, I don't...

The idea of Drake doing that's crazy to me. The implications, the implications of AI art is very, they're all very concerning. However, some of the images I can't deny. And it's not really so much the images themselves, so much as the idea. So it's still very human. It's still very much like the idea that somebody put into a prompt, you know, Drake making racist eyes at crying Asian girl. And that it was willing to do that.

The premise is what's funny. It's not necessarily so much that an image exists, although it does help. It's really just the fact that somebody came up with that. But I love my favorite ones that I've seen as of late have been... have been Shrek in Vietnam. Have you seen these? Not at all.

It's Shrek crawling through bloody woodland debris with like... It's really fucking distressing. but there's like a lot of Shrek Shrek crawling over fucking his friends dead bodies that's not crying about it This is what I like about AI This is really disturbing

This is like This is all I want to use it for Also like so what You know like fuck it whatever dude Like it's on its way It's here, it's here Yeah no I'm like you have to embrace it It's like anything

I heard somebody make a really interesting point about it Because one of the reasons why a lot of people Are afraid of it or afraid of it Or phrase the wrong word they don't like it because it threatens some people's jobs, especially in the artist. It's going to ruin a lot of things for sure. Absolutely. But somebody made a point in, and undeniably, I agree, even though it's like it's not nice to say.

But it's the same as when, say, an obvious example, cars, when cars started phasing out any other modes of transportation, especially when it came to horses, which was the main modes of transportation back of the day where it put a lot of people out of business because that was it was one of those things where it's like of course people were upset at the time of course but it's an inevitability and that's the unfortunate thing about AI

that it's going to mess with a lot of things that we appreciate right now and I was like fuck yeah they're right they're absolutely right about that yeah the reality is that AI is a tool and I think of it almost like a gun you know what I mean where it's like

there are, there are, there are places and, and times and appropriate times to use a gun, and then there are places that are deeply, deeply, deeply inappropriate. And those deeply, those deeply, those deeply inappropriate uses are going to hurt many, many people. Yeah. Yeah. But it's, but they're here. You know what I mean?

It's a, you, you can't just, like, snap your fingers and wish it away. It, it is here. Um, we're going to have to deal with it. Hopefully, like, my, my silver lining kind of optimism about it is that this puts so, so, so, so many people. out of work that it's kind of forced it kind of forces us to re-evaluate things like UBI and stuff like that

and just be like oh man well look man no one's there's a lot of people willing to work and no fucking jobs for them to do anymore because robots are doing everything how are we gonna like how do we how do we adjust to this new

that's like the best that you can hope for really is that like we just kind of understand intrinsically that like we have to just kind of take care of each other whether not that's possible whether not that happens And it's like, you know. Yeah.

I think it will happen. I think we just don't. We have, we don't, we don't, we don't, we haven't, we haven't pushed. We don't, we don't, we don't fight for the things you just fight for as, as people now. We've, we've got to lost the plot of like, this is important. Let's stand up for it. We're like, let's, let's get mad and let's all watch XQC stream instead of like, let's get mad. Let's get mad.

Let's, let's, he is. He sounds stupid. I don't like him, bro. Is that video? So I know one of the, of the. thumbnails I've seen is definitely fake of Charlie. Oh, Charlie? Yeah.

The screenshot that you're, Charlie being like, there was like a fake Charlie video that said some major Middle East drama just dropped or something. Something like that, yeah. It looks like he dropped like a 17, 18 minute video talking about the conflict. I wish. But there is one thing that I don't know if it's true or not. I didn't verify it, but XQC saying. that I learned about the conflict so you don't have to or whatever. Oh, yeah, that's real.

That's a real video. So that's actually real. That's actually real. Oh, my God. I don't know. I'm going to explain it. I kind of do actually want to watch that, to be honest. There's as much as much as you to do these things.

He's Canadian. Canadians usually have the worst takes about everything. Like, as a- They do, dude. So many like- As a people, they really have horrible political takes. So many-so-many-so-many-cifter, like, political folks are literally just Canadians, and it's very bizarre.

They're really obsessed about American politics and these weird Canadians that have no and nothing is going to impact them at all. It's very bizarre. It's insane. It sucks, bro. Get the fuck out of here. Like, you're the worst.

Canada is not the worst. But like, shut the fuck up. I mean, we put fucking chili. We put fucking fries in a bowl. Get fucked. Bro, they just finished killing Native Americans.

That's how behind they are, bro. They just finished doing that, like, come on, bro. They just got a lot. We did that shit hundreds of years ago. They just did that shit. They're doing, I mean, let's be a little fair. They've been doing all right. They're just, people are starting to, like, find out that, you know, there's a few

leftover that they're like, ah, shit, you know, but they did an all right. They found mass graves and stuff. They've done, you know, they're not as bad as you think, man. You got to get a little bit of us. They're stupid. You ever heard, I haven't preached talk, bro? No. I've heard them.

The shit they're talking about, the shit they're talking about goes over their head. The shit that they're speaking currently about. It's like, yo, y'all are stupid. Y'all are dumb. You want to talk about, like, that's the whole thing about, I mean, that's where J.F. is from. He's from Canada. Like, that is, just to let you know. They're a different breed.

This guy. And then if I watch a lot of true crime podcast stuff. I haven't been watching recently, but when I, like, get on my, my benches or whatever, there are a stupid amount of cases that are. in Canada. There is an unusual amount of the thing is believe you're like I didn't kill somebody. Okay I guess they're just

they're so I don't I don't understand and you know I got a sort of some people that are probably going to be some people that are probably on the spectrum that I I was about to start combing through like who JF is just a little bit for a little bit of context and I didn't finish

and I imagine that is really irritating because it's like what the fuck you like So real quick, JF, white supremacist's streamer. He may not have heard of him, but he also, if you're aware of the commentary side of YouTube, you might have ran into him

because he was streaming with Andy Warsky. If you know who we are, there's a chance you know who Andy Warsky is, right? So they were making that sweet white supremacist's money. So all we're going to do is fast forward. This guy is autistic and French, goes hand in hand, and he started dating these mentally challenged girls.

dated one that they called Mama J.F. Who is, she is not well. All of a sudden, fast forward to just a little while ago, it turns out Mama J.F. is missing, right? She's been missing for four months. She's been missing since June. And he said he didn't say nothing. And he just, his story, it keeps bouncing around

about saying she is resourceful. She is like a zero-zero-seven. She is really good at travel. And I dropped her off in a gas station and she went on a trip. That's his thing. You just said he dropped her off and she's now doing her thing. But then at the same time, he says, well, she's been planning this for a long time. But then at the same time, oh, she kind of left miraculously.

She did this before. And I wasn't sure if she was going to come back or not. And I was like, oh, wait, so which one was it? He also cleaned his apartment completely sterilized his apartment. his apartment, changed all of the plastering walls, cleaned everything out. So it sounds like he was sure that she was never coming back. But then he also says, oh, I'm not sure if she's coming back or not. And it is crazy.

I'm not going to go through all of it, guys. There's plenty of streams and people talking about it that if you were really interested it, we also talked about in our deep dive and extra ammo, like Chris mentioned, the top of the show. But I cannot, and this stems to me saying we're in a simulation. I cannot accept what this guy's doing as it is top, it is, what is above S T. Is anything above S T here? It's zero to S T.

There is nothing stupider that I cannot believe what he's doing. I can't believe what he's doing. He keeps, he's been on multiple streams at every stream that he goes on. He has like a different version of something that happened. And I don't understand. If he has a lawyer, I don't know anything about this guy. like his background, but if he has a lawyer, this lawyer probably killed himself.

That guy is overworked. That buddy is overworked. He didn't just drop him as a client. I think he just just just, just, I think he just off to it. Like, he was like, this is too much. I can't deal with this anymore. As a legal advisor, this is the craziest thing I've ever seen. I just don't want to be alive anymore.

And then he just killed himself. The poor guy is just, he's just sitting there and just, he says, I can't handle this, bro. That's why I felt like say, imagine Trump's, All right. But now imagine Trump's lawyers times a thousand. Because that's basically what it is. Because Trump does a bunch of shit where it's like, oh my God, I can't believe,

I can't believe you're doing this. Stop doing this. Please stop. I used to think that about Trump. And then I was like, nah, he don't care. He don't care. I don't think he cares. Because I think his, for Trump, his, his behavior has only gotten him further in life.

Can you guys do your favor and click the like I sent you in the chat? What you got? I just got a little something. Oh, no. You found something. weird. Oh my fucking God. He's crying.

He's crying. I feel so bad he's crying, dude. It took me a while to find it too. I was like scouring. I was scouring. Yeah, I saw that you were pretty,

uh, ew, if you scrolled down, do you see the next one? Oh, do you? Amario running? No,

no, no. The one that's showing up for me is he's just shitting everywhere. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, It's him shitting all over Where is that?

Where is that one? It's just in the replies. Like, you scroll down. You scroll all the way down and you'll see it. It's him screaming and shitting. It's some fear. What the fuck? That's what happens, man.

Sometimes that happens. Yeah. Dude, that's just what happens. Sometimes that happens. I've never just shat like that in my life. Am I weird? You've never shat all over your legs and screamed. You never had hunched over like a dog.

I've definitely laid down, got really upset, cried and shot myself. But like, never like, how many months ago was this? Yeah, how many days ago? Don't worry. Don't worry about it. Definitely recent. Definitely, definitely less than a moon ago. You know what I've been wanting to find?

You know what I've been wanting to find? There's this picture that you liked for. I don't remember why. But it was like, I think you see like some chick's legs and like her like nails or some shit and the people were saying it was you I don't know if you remember this shit. There's me. What? This picture that I've been wanting to find for it because this was

I don't remember when this was. But like for whatever reason you liked it for I don't know some comedic purposes and then you know it shows up on people's feeds and people were like, they saw it because it shows up in the news feeds and the people were asking if it was you. Me? Directly?

It was clearly some black lady's like her nails or something. that. I remember that. I was like, how the fuck do I find this? I want to find it so bad. There was this thing. So yesterday I was talking about Dragon Ballsia on Twitter and Chris tweeted at me, you're gay, right? So that I tweeted under him, you. And it's this video that looks like Mr. Bees is beating off just out of camera. I thought that's what that was. I was so funny.

It's so fucking funny. Part of me was like, part of me looked at that and was like, is that Mr. B? I couldn't quite tell. It's so funny. He's just out of camera and I'm like, what is he doing over there? What are you doing on? What are you doing about Dragon Ball anyway? Why are you?

Yeah, what about Dragon Ball now? I was talking about Dragon Ball because me, we're just having people, you know, we are, nerds and anime fans, just going to arguing about stupid shit. That isn't real. That isn't real, you know, the usual. I can't imagine people fighting over shit that isn't real. Stop, stop. That is real?

Head trauma I'm a She's like head trauma Yeah That's good Isn't that so That's true That bothers me

Trauma That hits close to home Because Goku does have head trauma Oh for sure yeah Literally That's what that's what it translates to I think Goku does have brain damage Damn

Has anybody made an animated short of Oh what happened if he didn't hit his head head. He would just destroy the planet. He was like, one of the more, that was one of the more famous things that I think I've seen. Like, oh, like, what if Goku didn't hate it?

Or I think it was like, what if Vegeta and Goku swapped? So, Vegeta was like the good guy and and, uh, and, uh, Goku came with his brother and all that stuff. It's kind of cool. Yeah, I imagine so. I just, I just, I've never seen it personally. If he never hit his head, he would have just went to Earth.

Well, no, he wasn't, he wasn't strong enough as a baby. So like, maybe, like, grandpa, Gohan would have probably been able to kill him if he would have kept growing up brutally. But, like, if Grandpa Gohan was dead, also, Roshi would have, too. I feel like he would have just ate him. Like, he would have, like, he would have, uh, grandpa would have been like, hey, this fucking thing sucks. Let's eat it. He would have put his whole arm in his mouth and sucked it out and then it would just be bones.

Rumpelhohobeye would just went up to him, ripped his face clean off like brutally. Yanked it off and ate it. Ew. Gross. just like real calm like he's like oh look at that walks off right ripped his face off and everybody's like

and then credits and then Roshi's like yo that was a kid I know you want to fuck him after I'm done and then it would have been out of an episode oh it would have just been

like whoa like wow that's this is a different show we're lucky Goku Goku's good you would have got a very different show oh look I just saw um

I never used that for you page, but it defaulted when I just checked on on mobile or what, or not mobile, the desktop. And it shows you her name, just pearly things where she said thin women

are hotter than curvy women. I'm just like her fucking her, you know, slap like a lot. Her stupid fuck. I don't my slap the fuck out of her. Like I hope my beats her. There is something that compels me that I want to like when you look at her, I want to shake her.

I don't know, like, I have this weird feeling that I want to, like, you know, like, oh, there's a gif. This is the best way I can describe this. There's a gif of, from the cartoon Mega Man show. And Dr. Light is possessed, right? And, yeah, when he just pushes, like, just throws her down. And I have this weird compulsion where, like, when I, if I saw, I want to. who just push her. I wanted...

She's a very pushable person. She really is... Yeah, I don't know, man. She's just bizarre. I know she's... I know it's a grift. I get it. I get it's all engagement and all that stuff,

but it's just like... I don't like that bitch. But she's such a weird... It's just such a weird... Yeah, she's not convincing at it. Nobody likes her. Even in her own, like, sphere, I don't think she's really respected at all.

At all. She's not. I just don't... I don't understand what the point is. I don't like her. I don't like her. It's... She makes me mad and she has a vagina

and like she says dumb things about the vagina and that makes me upset because my daughter's going to have to happen with her. And that makes me upset that she doesn't have to deal with people like her. Right. I saw that documentary that I think it was Jay Aubrey did. I'm pretty sure it was Jay Aubrey. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, it confirmed what a lot of people speculated

because I didn't care to look into her. So, glad, luckily he did the work. Great job. Yeah. And yeah, she's exactly low self-esteem, just anything, that humiliation, almost like a humiliation fetish at this point, because it's the worst grifting out of

any of the grifters. It's not, you know, there's standard griffing, like a grifting like, what's her name, Candace Owens, where she does it convincingly enough to where people kind of forgot that she was a grifter, like, they think, like, she just kind of fit in. It's crazy. And then there's, like, shitty grifting, like the quartering to the point where

he's fine with grifting, but at the same time, I think he doesn't fully understand what he's doing. Like, he just took a, there's a, Potsie book publisher called him. I saw that. I saw that. And he had no idea that he took a sponsorship from them, from anelo pill. They're literally, you know.

Yeah. It's marketed as like this. So hold on, hon. Let me paint the story a little bit. So it's a website that, it's a website that specializes in selling band books, basically, or like controversial material is what they refer to it, right? but the issue is it's it's all just right way

it's all Nazi shit like it's not you're not finding like the communist manifesto which is also very controversial you're not finding like Marxist literature or anything like that or any other it's it's just Nazi stuff it's fascist material yeah it's this Nazi lit

it's a bunch of Nazi stuff and it's literally it's just Nazi stuff and it which is like which is unfortunate because the premise of having an online video that specifically that specifically deals in controversial material only is actually a good idea. Yeah, it's wasted. Protecting things that would be banned or bookburned, you know, metaphorically bookburned

that people don't want you to read or stuff like important stuff in history. But like Chris said, and then if you look at their social media, there was a fight because I actually started looking at social media and yeah, there's, oh, just birthday shout-out, you can get a discount code on Hitler's birthday. Like, oh, it's a boy's birthday. It's like that type of dumb shit that they're posting. And then if you look into the people that started it, they have a whole line of, a whole footprint of that, yeah, they're just racist. Yeah, it's obvious.

It's one of the things that Gordon didn't do like two seconds of research. We're just like, oh, let me look into these people. Let me just. It didn't matter to him. Or he did and didn't care because he understands. I don't think he's that smart. I really don't. I don't think he's.

I don't think he's that smart. I really don't. I think he's a good business person and, like, he has a, I guess, a successful coffee company. and he obviously his YouTube channel's growing and all this shit. Like he knows what to do. He knows what people to reach. But as far as like if, you know, like you can be an idiot and amass an audience and actually run businesses okay. Even if, you know what I'm saying.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I know firsthand that you can be an idiot and amass an audience. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Shout out to Chris. Shout to me. Shout to you, bro. I mean, right. Thanks, dude.

It's not that it's just, yeah, if you have drive, you know, and power, uh, if you're hungry, if you, if you devour, you're going to get what you need. And, yeah, it's about dick, it's about dick, it's about dick, it's about dick, it's about let's just, let's just get to, this one's get to some penis. Matter of for Martin, I'm from Venus. Yeah, let's let's get to some question. You, shout up to Derek, too, bro. Shut up.

I'm still afraid. I'm still afraid. I'm getting killed by the rock, dude. I'm still, I'm still looking, wow. He's going to be like, wow. He's going to do the whole thing. Wow. You're, you're.

Derek, right? He's going to grab you, put you up on his head, rip you and half. Before you die, you're going to say Obamna. My last verse would be Obama, 100%. He's going to kill you in the only, in the only way the rock knows how. He's going to use his special ability, where he hits you with a big rock. His special ability. Yeah, that's why he's, that's why that's his name.

If you don't like it, I like it, he gets. He gets the rock, like, you know, he reaches into his inventory. He presses a right D-pad. And then it equips the rock, like, out of nowhere. You know how in video games, if you're, like, the Hulk or something, you could pick up a rock out of the ground, even if you're in the top floor of, like, a glass. It's like that. Or he'll, like you just reach down into the ground, pull out, even if you are on, on, like, an iceberg. He will reach into the ground and pull out, a stold rock.

A stoned rock. A boulder. Stone. and pummel you to death with it. That's what it'll do. I love the idea of the rock hitting you in the head with a rock, and there's just a huge wet mark on the rock afterwards. Like the rocks has got a big wet spot on it because of your blood.

It's wet. I love it. I'm just putting it. I just put it. You know the hypercombo, the gamma wave, the Hulk, I just picture that. I'm just picturing that. I'm just picturing that. Oh, that's what I'm sorry.

Hulk was bugging in that game so much. He jumped into space and got a meteor, bro. And then he gets a meteor. He was walling in that game crazy. Did you guys play? He was Sonic clapping you. He was donkey kicking you. He was going nuts.

He's sick, dude. I fucking love him in that. Did you guys ever play the Incredible Hulk Ultimate Destruction? Of course. I didn't. Dude, ultimate destruction was fucking sick. If you've ever played prototype, it was basically that.

I think it was the same, I think it was the same studio, but with the Hulk. So instead of like, you know, whatever prototype was, it was the Hulk and you were just going around smashing shit. You could pick up buses and wear them as gloves and beat, and just beat up everything around. It was so fucking sick. When are we getting a prototype remaster? Let's rock. What are we getting that? I don't know, man.

We need more prototype for sure. I don't know we're getting any time. I know we're getting the infamous remake. We need a prototype live action. action movie that goes into the deep lore of Alex Mercer and his quest for the prototype.

I don't remember what the funny story was. The story is stupid as shit. It sounds too like he's a secret agent. I hate that name. You're the prototype. It's one of those names, I'm Alex Mercer and I'm like, shut the fuck up, dude.

It is very, it is very much like the name. Mercer's an overly badass name. Yeah. It's so badass that it's unbelievable that anybody would be named that. Right. And it's like not him. He wasn't special,

Before he got the mutation shit. He was a scientist. He wasn't, but that's, but that's what I mean. Like, he wasn't like, say, Sam Fisher, you know what I'm saying? Like, he's not like, he's not, like, Alex, that's that type of name, Alex Mercer. And I'm like, that's not what you name some fucking nerd. Like, get the fuck out of your, same should have been Simon Miller or something. I mean, great.

I also have a hoodie on and I wear a jacket over my hoodie. It was so fucking, I don't know, man. I don't care. I love that game. It's so cool. Prototype is awesome for, like, a multi-examble. alternative reason, but that was my ultimate... I'm convinced

prototype, probably... Oh man, I should be careful when I say this. I'll put it this way. I think there are shootings that did not happen because of prototype. Yeah, definitely. Those kind of game saved lives, for sure. Absolutely. That game was such a blow-off steam game for me

that I can't even tell you. Like, I love that game was like therapy for me. Wait, so did it stop your shooting? Time out. That's 100%. That's 100%. I came into school every single day. With the fucking ratchet, bro.

With the rougar. He had a rougar in his pocket, dude. Oh my God, this reminds me. This reminds me, um, yeah. First of all, I find it bizarre. Like, high school was actually pretty fun for me. Like, I was fine having a good time. But, uh, this reminds me of that story.

Have you seen this, this? So this guy, he's on YouTube and he does these mental health things, right? He's like a mental health, not guru or so, but he focuses on mental health consecration. I'm not going to name him because I don't really remember his name first off. And also I don't want to, I don't want to attract the ire of this guy. But so there's this guy. He's like a really nice guy. He has this whole story about how he came on to TikTok, right?

how he... Was a shooter? Yeah. Yeah. Was a shooter? And he went into school. Most horrible shit ever. That should mean he cried.

He went into school with a gun and he was like... And in the video on TikTok, he served prison time like for like many, many years. Right. And so he's back on and he's now doing like social media and he's like, you know, doing the good person bit which like, look, I don't know how back... I don't know if that's real or not. I fucking have no idea.

It could be totally legit, whatever. But like in the video he goes Yeah like I was just so angry And I went to school with a gun I didn't want to kill anybody I just wanted to die So the idea was that he wanted to pose a threat

To the school so the cops would kill him But he was like wrestled by like faculty or whatever Right But like There's like news reports about how he He didn't kill I don't think he killed anybody but he shot it a guy Did he?

I thought he shot up at the So what happened is afterwards, after he was released, a black person came after him, and I think he did kill people. I can be wrong. I think he did kill people.

I didn't hear that at all. I don't know what the fuck you're talking about. This is real. This is real. That guy that was on TikTok. I saw it. Some guy tried to kill him because he was a school shooter.

And what happened is that the guy that tried to kill him got arrested and got more time than he did. for shooting up a school actually not getting the guy that tried to shoot him you're trying to say in relation to the actual incident the guy that shot up a school

well well the point is like that's the thing it's like he didn't he didn't massacre like a bunch of people he didn't kill anybody he shot he didn't massacre a bunch of people but like if you should have no one person got shot because the gun went off and hit the dude in the leg

yeah yeah exactly that's what happened I remember that I remember that now. Yeah. But so now this dude's just on, it's so weird because he's just on TikTok now. And I don't know what to make of that really. Like, like, like, you know what? So here's the thing. I feel like there's plenty of people.

I know someone personally that went to jail for 11 years for attempted murder. And he turned his life around. I know it is possible for people to rehabilitate themselves. I know too many people like that, unfortunately. Right. And so it is possible. But this guy, though, and the way that he's going about it, like, being on TikTok, not like, because there's plenty of people who go to seminars.

They work with organizations and they do, they give speeches. They go to places. They do the real work. They don't fucking get on TikTok and be like, look at me. And here's another thing that really kind of made me that 1,000% turn me off of this dude. Or he was trying to say like, oh, it was one of those things where it's like, oh, there's white, there's racism against whites too. And then he talks about this story of like this black dude with a sword that attacked him.

Like that's, he had a sword. That's what it was. So that was the same guy. I thought maybe you're talking about the guy. He shows these cuts on his arm. I'm laughing because I'm just thinking of this dude trying to get him with a sword. Yo, wait. It's like, black Kenchi, the same red rag on his eyes, too.

He's like, I can't see if I can see him. Black Kenchi. Do you guys remember, do you remember that story in, like, 2016? The guy with the sword that's a sword in a dude? Yeah. I remember that so well. because I think of the meme that we shot where I was swinging the sword

and I was like, I'm white supremacist. Do you remember during COVID when there was this white guy like talking to us like, it doesn't matter what skin color you are. We're all N-words. And then they hoarded him and they attacked him. I remember that.

And he was like, it doesn't matter. We're all N-words. And then what happened is the whole crowd. They just, it looked. like World War Z they just get all in fact. Then there was some guy with a bow and arrow during COVID too. I don't know if he was the same

guy or not. That's right. We talked about that story and that one of the, some of the in our audience animated it with Legos. Was it? Oh my God. Yeah. That was the Lego. That was like the Lego or not the Lego. Was it? It was like action figure stop motion animation about the guy being killed. You see the bow and arrow.

Dude. Dude. Bow and arrow. Dude, the animated people on fucking fire back then. What the? We, we, we, that actually kind of just made me realize how. Yeah, that was like a, man, it, do, man, I really want to appeal to these motherfuckers because that was, that was so fucking cool. Shout to animators in general.

That was cool, yeah. Animators are awesome. Big fucking shout out. And that's the thing. Oh, you know what? And that's actually a good point of the finding these people and asking them if, uh, we could also share their work on our, on our social medas. so we can kind of like maybe get that whole

like a new renaissance of that shit man because that shit was crazy did we um because I saw that all right whatever shut the fuck you suck let's move on let's move on let's get to some questions

all right are we good I tried to do this like 30 minutes ago yeah that's good I'm putting that on a shirt I'm putting that that's gonna be one of our new merches for you shut that everybody that's not sweetie under it

go ahead Mojave scribe Broden. He says, returning patron and previous question asker here, I had to cancel my Patreon to you gaggle of you gaggle of ethnics after my job shut down because the chief financial officer fucking killed

himself by jumping off a New York skyscraper. Yo! That's fucking dope. That is crazy. That's sick. Did you love or hate, were you happy? I mean, well, you were probably mad about the

job saying, but. Well, so he said, so imagine my surprise when these newer episodes have ads for my old company Bed Bath and Beyond. Good to be back. Sorry for the non- question. Totally worth it, man.

That is crazy, bud. That's excellent. That is excellent. How real is it? Have been Bath and Beyond NYC suicide?

Yeah. I feel like Bayes did something. What the hell? Yeah, it's real. Wow, look at that. From the Tribeca building. The

The Jenga tower. That's the Jenga tower one. That's crazy. That's nuts. That's crazy. I love it, bro. I mean, I don't love that he died,

but like I love that. That is a crazy building to jump from, man. Because you don't even know if you're going to make it to the end. You don't know if you're going to hit one of those weird jaggy bits? Holy shit. That's the reason nobody has ever jumped off the Empire State Building, I'm pretty sure, because you just wouldn't reach the floor. Yeah.

You can do it. You got to have conviction. though. We gotta have a baggy shirt. You got to have a baggy shirt and baggy pants. So you can go out a little bit. And what you do is you try to float in and land on a building. You try to like making so, you land in a building like Batman. And they're like fucking infamous.

Batman, yeah, yeah. That weird like hover animation. I was going to kill myself, but I decided not to have enough time to figure I didn't want to anymore. That's what happens to most people in the middle of a jump to be, to be fair. I made a mistake, blah. Yeah, it's almost an instant. It's so funny. If my day that bad and then blah.

Yeah. I mean, it's not funny, funny, but, like, it's morbid. Three stories maximum because you might survive. So just, but most like five stories. That is way less likely. It's less likely. That's why I'm saying three stories is that good, like, medium where there is a high probability that you will die, but then there's also a pretty decent probability that you will

survive. Hey, do not jump off Bill. things. Because I've jumped from 20 and it hurts really bad. You don't want to give advice. Well, I'm not saying don't jump. I'm just saying if you were already planning on it. I'm not saying don't jump. I'm not saying don't jump, bro. Like jump. Fucking so stupid. All right.

If you're a CEO and if you're planning on jumping, here's what you do. I'm not saying don't jump. I'm saying jump, bro. Stop being pussy. Download your consciousness into the power drive. I mean, it's like bit like bender. I think somebody was what was it? Oh, it was Hermes. Hermes was going to like on the edge of a building. He's like, do a flip. And I always thought like that's the, that is the correct answer.

You tell motherfuckers, because that's the way to go out. You do some sick ass thing. You stick the landing but you explode your legs though. He lands and he turns into the ET. Remember that joke we said before? We're like, he lands and for a whole frame. He's

ET in extraterrestrial. I think that's actually animated too. I think that might have been like pork to place or something. Yeah, yeah. I think so, too. Hits the forked post. Yeah.

Where is pork to house? I hope he's all right. Yeah, I haven't seen him in a while. I've been talking about a fucking nigger in a minute. All right, let's move, let's get on to, uh, what is this? What?

Is that, Mr. Hot Salsa Rodey says, hello my favorite three musketeers. What are some of your favorite horror movies? Also, fun fact. The guy that sang the Grinch song voiced Tony the Tiger in the commercials. Oh, wow.

I'll choose to believe that, whatever. That sounds like... They're grinch. They're gay. They're French or gridge. I'll make those niggins pay. I don't know, man. I'm a big...

I'm a big Evil Dead guy, personally. I love those movies. A lot. Especially two. Two, I think, is... Two I think is like a perfect... A perfect movie. Hard movies don't really do much for me

because they don't scare me. So, like, ones that I can have fun... in are usually the ones that I'm going to love more. I agree. Evil Dead is usually top of those because everything else is either too, I don't know, man. Like I never got into the Freddie Krueger's or the Jason movies. Like they didn't do anything for me.

We were born after. During that time, they were like very much so big hits because my sister is 12 years older to me. So she was around when they were like coming out. Like they weren't not the first one, but some of the other ones. And she loves those movies. I like them for Because they are they're retarded

I like them for that reason I don't like serious If anything that's trying to take it so seriously I don't like it all And final destination is another one That's uh I love final destination The movie's world The movies

And I love that The way I laugh at those movies My grandmother would look at me with fear sometimes She's like he's laughing It's like this Final Listenation reminds you of those I don't know if you guys saw this trending on Twitter because Twitter's just become like an absolute cesspool lately.

But like I saw this, uh, it's like an animated recreation of like a bunch of Chinese workplace accidents. Have you seen that? No. No. So it's just like, it's not, I don't know. It's just, it's all a bunch of like, and like animated videos of like 3D rag dolls dying and like workplaces.

And I'm like, I know this is based on. I've seen these. I've seen these videos because the camera's in the same place. and like it's all the it's it's even got the Chinese text over it it's so insane I love when that's what those movies were basically there was a move there was a meme where

um which was like when you're um an age when you're an Asian man inside of a work of a smoke factory and you look up to the side and it just says LiveLeak and he starts sweating and I was like damn dude you're gonna get killed in a very grotesque manner very soon but

damn shout out to LiveLeak shout out to lively because I don't know I don't know how I feel about that I know you do miss I miss when it was a place that you had to go and not something that just infected Twitter I did miss that

I do think we lost something in taking everything and just putting it in the same place I do think it was better when we kind of had to go certain places for certain things in some respect right but

but that's not the world We're living in no more. It was so dope, bro. Alas. I do not care. I do not care. Ew. Is,

ew. Bloodsar wrote in. He goes, Hey, Green Goblin, Hobgoblin and New Goblin. That's mean. What's the weirdest way?

New Goblin sucks. It's definitely me. It's definitely me. It's definitely me in this equation. No. Sorry, dude. No, you're like Hobgoblin, I think.

I think. Because Dooblin is so clear. It's just a white, it's just literally just a white guy with short brown hair and on a fucking snowboard. You know, like it's, he sucks so.

It's not even a goblin. He's just a guy. Like, why is he even called the goblin at all? He's dude. He's dude for. Yeah, yeah. Harry Oswarden really is just the dude. The dude.

The guy. So dumb. Guy three enters, it's so fucking weird. Yeah, I don't know. Anyway, uh, Bloods are wrote and he says,

Hey, Hey, several goblins. What's the weirdest way? What's the weirdest way you found out about a very popular character slash series? I saw someone say they found out about God of War because Cratos was in Mortal Kombat 9. Stay weird.

That's crazy. Insanity right there. That's not that crazy. I can see that. If you just play fighting games, if you just play fighting games. I don't know how you could be that close to video games at all and just not be aware of Craytos's presence.

there's so many people man there's so many there are people who just play fucking FIFA you know that's true I guess look man it is true but it's one of those things where it's like I guess not being aware of even people who

don't play video games would be like oh I know that guy that's Halo that's that Halo guy you know they know who you're talking like like it's just one of those things like you see fucking Credos from like oh yeah I know who that is yeah I've never played a god of war game but i know who that fucking guy is that that jimmy halo bizarre

jimmy has jimmy rings yeah jimmy rings jimmy rings i think um well i mean i found out about uh uh what is it uh yota through soul caliber so i mean i can that's also crazy shit too but like it's i know that's fake so that's that's that's real i don't know if i believe you're no i'm gonna i'm gonna i'm gonna i'm gonna okay i guess you know like i played soul caliber and i saw this a little green, little green boy. I know you think you believe that, and I respect you believe that. But I can't believe that.

No, I swear. I had no, I told Kingston, I told you, I was not a Star Wars kid growing up at all. I missed the entire thing. But never seen Yoda be like, oh, that, what's that? You discovered Darth Vader, too, right? That way? Who's that?

Oh, never mind then. Not knowing about Darth Vader. You still have a lot of catching up to do, I guess. The most famous is probably ever. Yeah. Yeah. He hasn't, he hasn't been in anything I've played. Yeah. Or watched.

I was watching. So this is crazy. This is a crazy thing. It's really happened. I was with Lily's cousins one time. And we were watching. We saw Hugh Jackman come on the screen. And the cousin was like,

oh, that's the guy from the greatest showman. And I was like, excuse me? She's like, yeah, that's the guy from the greatest showman, right? And I was like,

don't you mean Wolverine for 20 years? Yeah. Oh, yeah, that too. I was like, you just say. That too. I mean, that makes sense He's that guy from the prestige, isn't it?

Yeah, that guy. Does that be a prestige? That's a trip of life, bro. Remember the Triv Life, the iconic movie? What are you talking about? What are you on now? It's like, oh, it's Adam Sandler from S&L. Yeah, it's fucking, like, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Yeah, like, no, there are certain things. Is that Eddie Murphy from Norbert? It's like, what the fuck are you talking about? Yeah, Eddie Murphy from Shrek. That's, see, that's fair actually.

I will say, that's not fair. No, no, it's not. For kids, for kids at that time. For kids, okay.

For kids at that time. Yeah, yeah, yeah, you're right, you're right, yeah. For kids, I'll back down.

There's no way, a seven-year-old child was like, I can't watch, I can't wait to watch delirious. Again. I mean,

look, and then some of them might be too young for like the nutty professor, you know, like, right,

that was, he had such, didn't stay consistent and so like you have like oh so there's like stand up there's coming to America there's the nutty professor and then there's Shrek like as far as like those big ones and those are like a lot of

times in between yeah and like it would be weird those movies are all kind of raunchy in in some way though to be fair agreed Eddie Murphy from Tower Heist right you you're from Tower Heist you're like what

from Tower Heist oh my God I never even seen that movie I never would have seen that but my friend's mom I was living with my friend at the time and she brought it over there's no other way I would have seen that movie

is that Miranda Sings from Reckett Ralph Oh my God She was in that movie for a half second He's like It's me Miranda Singh And she goes away Is she dead?

What happened to her? No, I think she came out and said something recently. I don't remember something that pissed people off. Yeah, whatever. It was one of those things that is pissed people. I don't remember what it was. She's not a likable gal, you know? I wonder what she has to say.

I wonder what she has to say about these. Oh, God. Get Colleen Ballinger to sing a ukulele song of peace. That's it. That could maybe help fit your things out. Everything, brother. Yeah. You should calm down.

I should tweet. That's a good tweet. You got something there. No, I'll tweet at her. I'll be like, yo. Yeah, yeah. I don't know if you heard, but the Middle East is in turmoil right now. Things are pretty weird right now.

You could. Things are pretty weird right now. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, same. Could you bring out your ukulele? I'll tweet Gal Gadot, ask her to do sing Imagine. Oh, dude. Let's go.

Like, it really, hey, I think about that every now and again. I think about that that I think about that every now and again. And I'm really sincerely every time fucking gobsmacked that they thought that that was like an appropriate thing to do. A good idea. Yeah. Yeah. So like, let's, I got an idea. Everyone's stranded at home and losing their jobs and isn't making money and can't afford rent and is losing their loved ones to a plague.

Let's do a collab. Let's imagine all the people. Let's imagine All of all Imagine Sing a really good song About Made famous by a wife beater

Yeah Let's take this wife Beater's little song About imagining Not being beaten up by her wife And Imagine not meeting your wife Savi

Sing it poorly Imagine your wife Listen That's what he was really singing And then like The record company was like Listen Can we like

make this a little bit less volatile, please? Well, you always time to disemort my... I'm so bad. I can't do Liverpool. I don't mind beating up my wife. Yeah, that's better. That's good. That's pretty good.

I like that. I really love it. Yeah. So can we do that's my favorite thing to do? We can imagine with Hasidic Jews and members of Hamas. Oh my God. I feel like they would have a hard time getting along. I feel like there'd be some tension for sure.

So what we'll do is we'll stitch it together. We'll tell them that it's like, oh, it's just their side. It's just net yahu's people. Trick them into a collab. I can't work if he's here. It's the idea that this is like a fairly odd parents episode or something where you could just like resolve it in like 22 minutes. This is like an Icarly

Like if I If I wrote I Carly This would be the pilot episode It would be It would be I Carly solves The Israeli-Palestine conflict I love this

And it would be here Yeah I can't work if he's here too Any more Walk away Did you see that Corey How are we gonna do this? Did you guys ever watch a show Called Corey in the House?

Of course I didn't watch it but I'm aware of it So Corey in the House Has the I don't know why this episode is being I don't know why I'm thinking about this but there was an episode where

all right so let me lay the groundwork here first Corey in the house is a show about Raven Raven Simone's brother from That's O Raven

becoming a chef with his dad in the White House Oh no no no no He doesn't become a chef The dad was always a chef His dad became a chef And then he went to live

with him in the White House So this is the story This is the story of Corey in the house And there's an episode where they accidentally sell Alaska to the Russians And they have to win it

back through it in like a dance competition. Is this real? I swear to you, I'm not even fucking remotely getting. I swear to you, they CG the dances. I, like, I, I, this just came into my head, uh, like immediately. I, I don't know why. I don't know why what we were talking about reminded me of this.

I can't believe, I can't believe that's a real thing. Derek, you simply, you simply, I understand this is very funny and it is, I would lie about it, but I assure you this is real. That's, that's, it's very real. There's, that is, okay, all right, okay, oh, it just sounds so, it's scary in the house. Why would they be involved in, how would you accidentally, like, oh my, there's so many things that I just have to, watch it. That's the only thing I can do. The episode is called Air Force One Too Many. Air Force One Too Many.

And there's a scene where they're in a dance. Oh, it's DDR. Sorry, they're doing a DDR. Oh, DDR, okay. But like, but I swear to you. Makes way more sense now. That is that it's dancing. Yeah, yeah, you know how much the Russians love DDR. You have to see this clip.

It's huge over there, Chris. It's huge. Can we put this in the episode? Can we put this clip? I guess I'm going to have to see this. Hold on. So let me send you. So the timestamp go to go to 18 minutes and 15 seconds into the, it's the whole episode on YouTube. It's called Air Force One Too Many.

But like there, it is, he is dance battling the Russian prime minister. And it is the, it is such a. It is such a fever dream of a fucking thing. Why is the president not doing it? I don't like, uh, he delegated Corey to do it because Corey has the exaggerated, the exaggerated swagger of a young black team. So it's also racist.

It's like, it's like racist and play, hey you boy, you're, you're good at dancing. Get over there and win back Alaska. Oh, sure,

Mr. President. It is, Yo, it gets so fucking, I watched this on mushrooms and got so scared. Like, it really scared me. But he wins the dance battle and then they get, they get Russia back. Spoiler alert. Spoiler alert, sorry. I can't believe they won it back.

For season one, episode five. Season one, they did this, by the way. That shit's only going up from there. It's only going up from there, bro. It's only going up from there, bro. That is so crazy How are you gonna jump to strike that fucking early That would be like if they went to space

And Fast and the Furious one Yeah exactly exactly that Fucking wild Although I guess Episode 1 Raven Simone could see the future If that's a Ravens So I guess the whole I guess the whole point of

Disney Channel sitcoms is that they are Shark jumping stories in the first place Fair enough Like wizards I didn't watch that show But Wizards of Waverly Place I assume is just about fucking real wizards

Who are alive somewhere which is already like, all right. Yeah, it just well-established in that universe. I guess it's called N-Words from where you plays, but yeah. It works. I don't think you called it. I don't think you called it that. I definitely called it that.

I called it magical N-words from everywhere the place. Magical errors. What about a Corey in Hamas? What about that? You think that one? They're saying, shut the fuck. Corey and what? You think that will solve the...

You think he could talk to a... Somebody get Kyle Massey on the phone. Maybe there's some shaggy. Nanyahu and Corey fucking have a DDR and dance up to win the territory. And Corey beats him by a mile, bro. My headphones got tickled. How does that even happen?

I think headphone chords are alive. Corey beats him by a country mile, bro. He fucking destroys him, and Netanyahu has to step down. Like, Israel has to pack up and leave. It has to pack up and leave, Israel. Yeah, Israel has to pack up and leave. Go find the land of milk and honey again, niggas. Dude, oh, my God, the idea of Corey.

Corey and Hamas. Oh, my God. That would be so... Before you keep making fun of the... shit again, dude. What's the next one? Next time on Disney Channel, Corey and Hamas.

With all that Middle Eastern, like, fucking harmonic minor music. Harmonic minor, it's so specifically accurate. All right, let's see, let's move on. Oh, my God. And Hamas. It's a party every week, nigga.

Oh, God. I don't even understand. So bad. There's doing all this atrocities. under the name of Corey. So Harry Dubois gagging on a Lugar wrote in. He says, Ola, Hispanic, panic,

well-spoken elder, and Sweeney. My question reads thus, is sober October a valid practice, in your opinion, or is it a way for addicts to prove that they're on top of it? He wrote it in quotes.

That's so mean, stupid. He also says, P.S. the Discord. He also says, P.S. The Discord link broke New one coming soon, boss. Sweeney, you have an answer for this? You have an answer for this man? Okay. There will be a new one.

Sober October. Do you guys know the origins of Sober October? No. I have no idea. It's, so, I think this was like 2016 or something. Joe Rogan with his friends, Burt Kreischer, Ari Sheffir, and Tom Seguer. This was because of Burtz was like,

four horsemen of the apocalypse. Basically, basically. And like the only one that I somewhat like is Tom Seguro still. And my relationship with him is a little bit iffy because I said that he, what do you call it? He muted me on Instagram, whatever that's called. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. So I respect him a lot less, but, you know, whatever. But long story short, they did a competition.

It only started because Burt Kreischer is a fucking alcoholic retard. And they just try to get him sober for like a month. And so they turned into a competition, and then it got too far because Joe Rogan's insane. And he must destroy everybody. And they started like, oh, we need to do this and lose this amount of weight. And whoever can get this many miles on our heart trackers and stuff. And then he started going to the part where he's like pissing brown because he has no more water in his system other than to keep him alive. Is it pissing brown?

Yeah, basically it got to the point where they were just... You see that beige in my toilet bowl? That's the inner linens of my kidneys. I don't need. If you piss Brown, you got to go to a hospital. I piss beige, boy. I piss baby. You're a pussy if you don't, if you'd never experience that.

That's the Joe Rogan podcast. And so they stopped it finally because it got to the point where they were like, oh, this is getting too dangerous. And then it became like nerfed. And then everyone that were watching and stuff like, this is gay and boring now. But yeah, it was the whole thing where it's like, oh, it just gets sober for a month. And then we'll continue our debauchery after. words and it's like well then what exactly is the point like really what is really the point of

you take it a month off other than maybe your body thinking you yeah like I don't know to me like I could easily go a month sober the thing is like incredibly easily if you need to prove to yourself you can do it like some people need to prove something they can do it that happens yeah I mean that's yeah so essentially would have they have a problem you know like when I used to drink a lot I decided to stop I just decided to stop drinking

and I was yeah I can go like I can go to parties without smoking and drinking and I proved it to myself. And I was like, all, cool. And then from there, now I don't really smoke a drink at all anymore. But I had to prove it to myself that I could do that, you know? So some, if, if we need to prove it to that, but like, if it's like a, it's October, no more. It's like, no November, you know, bro. Like, just stupid.

Which is retarded. That one's like, I, no respect for anyone who does that, like, zero. Zero. Zero. And why I say that specifically is because it's, I definitely did it before. It's just not healthy. That's the big, that annoys me. It's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, and

Ethetical like say how okay sober October it actually can have a lot of benefits because people like oh I'm gonna cut out alcohol I'm gonna cut out fast food or whatever I'm like actually that's incredibly healthy. That's great. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Not beating off is actually like you talk to your fucking You're fucking urologist and you'd be like no you should keep the pipes clear. You're crazy not dude Keeping it built up is not I don't beat off at all and my dick is like a knot. It looks like a fucking It looks like a fucking balloon animal not. It's fucking perfect right. I'm fine. Yeah, dude I did I did I did I did No, not November one time, and my balls were basically as big as, as, do you ever guys play tetherball? You're insane. It was like, you're insane.

That's not real. It doesn't happen. My scrotum inflated to the point where it was smooth like a tether ball. Because you know, like you got all this room, right? Like it's like stretchy and like wrinkly, like old man. But if you fucking, if you, if you, if you go into the future, your test, you're, you're, you're, your, your, your, your, your, your, your, your, your, your, your, your, your, your, your, your, your, your, your, your, your, you're a specimen will. build up to the point where you like, I'm telling you.

Sometimes I see tether balls and it reminds me of that fuck, I have a little PTSD from that shit. I can't go, I can't go to like high schools or playgrounds or whatever and see a tether ball and I get like a little freaked out.

I just don't know how people do it in the first place. Could you imagine? I can't go. I can't go. I can't go. I can't go. I can go two days.

I can go two days. I cannot go two days. I can't go to easy. I can't. Impossible. A week. A week is when I'm like, I got to do something about this.

The second, if I'm busy. 24 hours, the second 24 hours hits, it's done. Like literally, like a circadian rhythm. Do you feel it? 100%. It's like, I feel like something's wrong. Something's not right.

I mean, I can definitely get like, because sometimes I'm just too busy. That's what it really comes down to. Honestly. Where I'm like, oh, I didn't, I don't have. Because even making time, like say, for example. Go to a bathroom, random bathroom beat off. He just run in there real quick. This is like, I'll give me a second.

He just goes to a bathroom beat the thing. It comes back. Nature calls. I will say one time, though, I was really irritable because of that. But this was a long time ago, and I used to drive from Hacienda Heights to Glendale for work was 30 miles.

He used to drive like 30, 30 plus miles to work. And one time I was so fucking just, I was so busy. I was so busy and I was so traffic down. I was upset. I was about to do falling down with Michael Douglas. I was about to do that shit. And I was like, bro.

I was like, this is too much. And then I was like, I think I just got to beat off or something. I just got to beat off of traffic. And then like I was like fucking. I'm looking, I'm looking around and shit. I beat the fuck off, dude. I gotta tell you something.

I get why people like try to fucking public and all this stuff because it's some, it's just like, when you're doing some shit that you know you shouldn't be doing like that, fucking best nuts. Did you immediately like rubbing your hands in and putting your hair like slick air? Like slick air? Like virgines like Virgil did. Everybody.

Everybody. Everybody. Stupid. No, what I really did, what I really did was, First of all, that's insane. Yeah. There was a, That's insane where you're weird saying.

There was just gotta cut me off. There's just gotta cut me off, right? And I was just like, I was like, I got something for you. You come down? Yeah, I got something for them. I fucking do. I shot, can you imagine? Can you imagine for a moment?

Imagine. Yeah, yeah, go ahead, go ahead. Imagine for a moment. Before you go, before you go to, you open your car, right? Before you're like, I got to go for a drive. You come in your hand. You're sitting. And you, and then you get in your car and you drive.

hand is cupped. You've got it just in your hand ready. Waiting for someone to honk at you. Waiting for somebody to like get on your day. Oh, they cut me off and then you pull on next to them. Throw it. Throw it at their window. You throw it in their face. You start arguing like, go out of the window. You tell them, you tell them, roll the window down.

You do the little finger thing. Roll the window down. Yeah. They're like, what do you want? an overhand throw I'd rather get shot than that I'd rather get shot than that any day I want to take it up to the next level I want to I want to make

a boba cum so you go like you go get those those Boba T's so you get your cum like spheres of com Like little nuggets Like cum nuggets And then

I mean I haven't had a fucking sling shot since I was a kid but you fucking see where I'm fall you follow you follow me right now right is crazy you grow up you still do the same thing it's the same scenario but there's a little force now i definitely feel like this is why i feel like children i feel like this is why we evolve the way we do i feel like there's a reason why our bodies only do certain things at a certain point because if you could do that as as like a seven-year-old and freeze just like just like somehow coagulate that shit into like a sphere and use it a slingshot ammo, they would.

They would. They would do it. Yeah. That's so true. What you're, what you've just described to me is, is tragic to the human condition. Not really. Boba come to, Kingston, you mean you get slingshot

with a sphere of cum, are you kidding? You're not, you're not. You're not, you're not. Like a real slingshot? Like a, like a not toy one, like a serious one? Like a weapon, like a weapon. They will hurt their slings. They will hurt the fuck out of you. Imagine that's cum. Imagine it's a little bead of cum that it hits you.

It's really tiny. And it hits you and it blows up like a gallon half a gum in it. And it doesn't wax over you and you fall down. A gallon. A gallon. That is insane. It's just a non-Euclidean fucking.

Now we're just thinking of future tech. Now we're just thinking of like, oh my God. Why is it so much? It's so much. We hear at Apple. We here at Apple have managed to find a way to condensed 76 gallons of cum into a single

thumb-sized bead. It was Steve Jobs' his dying wish. His dying wish. Complete my work. This was the last thing that he, this was the last thing in his notebook before before he was taking it. Before they

Cere them in his tomb, before they fucking, before they closed his fucking tomb on him, that's what he asked for. If the government subsidized, uh, or if if Apple subsidized billions, from the government to work on this project, would you guys mind?

Yes. Extremely yes. If they increased, if they increased my tax 100% I would be all right with it. If they increased my tax, I'd still be fine with this.

They should, in fact, they should increase my taxes, lower my wages, raise my rent. You're just willing to go down with the plane. You're just completely. We have another, what was it called Black, I mean, Black Tuesday or what was it called, the market crash in the 30s or whatever? Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. That's like a nigga Wednesday, right?

Yeah, yeah, yeah, that was the next day. That was the next day. Whatever that was, we have another one of those, but it was worth it because we all have, like, you have these government officials going to everyone's house and passing out gumballs. Oh, man. It's worth it. Everybody, the economy is crashed. You see this sphere. This holds two gallons of cum.

And they give you a bag of 30. You know, that's crazy. That would be, like, they're a scientists. They're a scientists who would probably, they would look at that and they'd be like, I don't know why you did this, but that's, like, scientifically speaking, that's amazing. That actually is incredible. Like, if that's true, if you've, like, if you've managed to do that, that is, like, one of the most incredible, like, actually, sincerely, one of the most incredible things that we would have ever seen.

Where would have all that come from? It would have means, it would, it would, it would mean you've circumvented a way around mass. Like that's, that's insane. That is insane. It's just like, oh, we can make anything, anything now. Yeah, it's kind of like, I guess the only way you can do it at some point, it's like, you figure out a way to, to turn it into a gas. Somehow. Yeah, yeah, yeah, and then somehow like.

And then you can like make it turn like liquid again. Well, the gas would still, the gas would still weigh as much as the liquid would. If it's that much, it would still be the weight of the liquid. Gas doesn't weigh anything, idiot. It's in the air. Yeah, dude, for sure. Sorry, my bad. Why do you think it's fucking moron? Like, you can, the scientists always say, astrophysus says that you can pick up Jupiter.

Yeah. Why do you think when you fill your car up, it gets lighter, idiot? Yeah, dude. I forgot how, you know, that's not how mass works at all. But yeah, whatever, dude, for sure. That is literally how mass works. Mass equals mass equals acceleration. Mass equals mass.

Yeah, M, E, M equals E, M equals M equals M equals M equals M equals M equals. I said, it's like, what have you, I decide, what have you uncovered? Me. Me. Brilliant. As he freaking blows his head off. As he eats his old job. As he eats the top part of his own job.

The thing that I love is the thing. What I love about that is the insinuation. The very idea that him turning to some guy saying me, exploding his head, like from that moment on, we learned so much because of it. Like that, for some reason, was the inciting incident that led us to understand.

of the world around us because Albert Einstein frantically turned around said me and explode. Is that how we, uh, is so it because of this, this is how they learned how to, um, yeah, have gallons of come in a mall. Yeah, the implication being that if he had not turned around and frantically said me and exploded, we would not have the technology that we have today. That's so fucking awesome. That is sick. What if an alternative universe and alternative timeline?

That legitimately happened. And he's with, you know, that happened right after he met Oppenheimer and all that shit, blah, blah, blah, blah. And when they're ready to drop those bombs and the bombs are dropped, but it's just gallons, like tens, hundreds of thousands of gallons of cum. It turns every hydrogen molecule in the area into five gallons of cum. And a cummic bomb. So everyone just drowns. So that's up. That's so crazy.

It'd be crusted over. Yeah. It'd be crushed. Nagasaki. Still were devastated. We have to venture into the crust lands. People would, there'd be people, there'd be covered and come staying there. Yeah.

They'd be mummified and cum. There's so much. They turned to, they turn, dude, those two areas turn into new lakes. That's how much common it is. Like, they can't, they can't extract it's too much. That's what the fall out is. The fallout is just the smell. Everyone's just disgusted.

It's just the smell. You have like explorers? You have explorers that are like, wait. We're new to the cum lands. We're close. The Japanese surrendered because it was just too gross. Like the emperor is, he's on, he's giving it. He's addressing his people and he's gagging.

He's just like, dude, this is too much. We can't do this anymore. We got to surrender. You know what's really wild? The idea of that like, A lot of people, like a lot of people in the military were like, yeah, they surrendered after the first one. They definitely surrendered after the first one. They were going to surrender.

They were going to surrender probably before, like, hurry, hurry, hurry, hurry, hurry. Yeah, they were just like, press the body. Press the mind, press the mind. That's the thing that's truly crazy about it is that like you could see a scenario like where if like if they weren't on the back foot where like there would have been a pretty good case to be like, listen, this is. going to go on for ever. They weren't really on my back foot. That's what I mean. They were losing a Pacific theater,

but they weren't losing. They weren't losing in a way that was like... They were done for, really. No, not by the time we dropped the bomb on them. Not in the moment. They had more... That's not what I'm saying. What I'm saying is, realistically speaking,

the war at that point in time would not have persisted for as long as they were afraid that it would have. it just wouldn't have let's be real if it wasn't for Cumanheimer Because they were

They were fucking shit up in the Philippines And shit too Speaking of Oppenheimer actually That's actually a good reference to a previous question Because I learned about Albert Einstein To that movie Had no idea That's crazy

That is crazy You had no poo You had no fool who's the most famous One of the most famous Scientist of all time You had no clue Was You imagine watching Oppenheimer

Can you imagine watching Oppenheimer? Albert Einstein come on some screen and you whisper Who's that? They say it out loud Who's that? Who's that nerd? Who's this nigga?

Who's that? He was this dick and everyone's like, you're kidding, right? He's like, no, who is that? Who the fuck is this guy? No, seriously, who's that guy? Why is he showing up so fucking late in the movie? Fuck this guy. I don't care about this.

Like, I've already got, I'm trying to, yeah, yeah. He looks like that guy from Jimmy Neutron. Who's this fucking Nazi? I don't care about this. Oh, man. Who's this Nazi? The least Nazi of German. Best friends with German ever.

Dr. Mangolin shit. You see him in the background, like, just chopping it up with fucking Mangula. Like, hey, how's it been? How's it going over there? How's back home? Oh, my God. No anesthesia, huh?

It's kind of fucked up, but I do your thing. That's a little much. I can whip you. Well, so if you're like, oh, oh, you don't want it. Okay. All right, no problem. Germs, GERMS 42 wrote in. This is hello, hello, Shart Tank.

I've been listening since episode three. Damn. That's a long timer right there. My question is, my question for you guys is, if you had to present your own hoax to the Mexican government, what would it be? I would, I would absolutely stage an interview with the Chubacabra. Like a million percent. I'd be like, I'd be like, we managed to secure, uh, we would be like, we managed to secure, uh, We managed to get him in the room, thank God, to ask some questions.

And it would just be some guy caked in mud. With like a scream mask or something. I don't even know what I would. I have no idea what I would do. But I'd be like so. Mr. Chupacabra. And he's like, call me Cobra.

Or whatever. Call me Cobra. Call me Cobra. That sounds like, that's, you know what that actually sounds like? that sounds like a sitcom about like the Chupacabra going to like high school or something. Yeah. Like on Disney Channel. It'd be like, call me Cobra.

Yeah. Airs Sunday nights on Disney channel. Cobra. The idea of like, talking of Chippa Cobra is like, It's like, Ola Cupa. It's like,

oh la Chippa Capa, and it's like, you're having a conversation. The Tupacabra just said, well and you back to you. And you guys are having a conversation with the Tupacabra. And everybody's just like, The Mexican people are losing their mind. It's like having a swimming risk to Yajarona, you know?

It's like, oh, let's just, we're going swimming with the world. Stupid. It's like, is this stupid shit like that? I don't know. This would be a good question actually. But I think the real question is, what does the Baba Yaga think of the Israel-Palestine conflict? The Baba Yaga.

Isn't that the thing that like, if it's the Baba Yaga even look like? The Baba Yaga. What if it's just me? What if he ever like a bogeyman looking like? Straight up picture of me. Like photo image of me right now. Literally you.

It's just Rudy Giuliani with like the ink rolling down his face. That's terrifying. I actually, that would freak me out. That would be folklore material. Like if you flashed, if you took a photo of

Rudy Giuliani with like with the ink running down his ears, took that image and just put it. on the ceiling of a nursery like printed it on the ceiling of a nursery and flash the lights on and off for like three straight days

like I wonder what kind of conjuring you could do in the minds of those kids when they're like full grown up you were just frightened like really bad I bet it would be long lasting you fucking talk to those kids to see if they're okay and all they can say is just like those are my tits those are my tits

these are my tits give me my tits like that's trying to bite you fried those are my tits. We're not brave enough. That's the problem with us is we're not brave enough to do the stuff that it doesn't need to be done, but would be kind of neat to see. You know, like, we don't, like, we don't get to print a picture of Rudy Giuliani's face on the ceiling of a nursery and flash the lights on and off and traumatize young babies to see, like, what that would do. We don't have the bravery to do that. Yeah.

It's a really, it's kind of, I don't know, man. Yeah, dude. We're in this new woke world, dude. Yeah, we got to put our seatbelts on. We can't enjoy a beer on a drive home. We have to put our children in the backseat. Yeah. That's crazy.

The backseat's the least safe place. Yeah, it's bullshit. The backseat was so good. If the backseat was so good, then why did Rosa Parks not want to sit there? Facts. Facts. That's a real shit right there. I was always in the back of the bus on purpose.

Stupid bitch. That was the most covered. The back, the seat on the bus that was like back and to the right, like the back right most part of the bus. That was like, that was basically unofficially like the king of that bus. Like there's something about that seat that was insane. There was a quiet on the bus too that would sit like somewhere in the back and he was very quiet. Like he wouldn't sit in the right of the back, but he'd sit near the back and he was quiet. He would sit near the back.

And you know he would go. He went down and protect you. That was me. I would always sit at the front of the back third of the bus If you know what that makes sense That's a weird way to say that, but yeah, I was like I'm good here This feels this feels right I'm gonna listen to my CD player and have it skip as this bus Drives in the most unruly way possible as it takes me home

Nice thing I remember music used to skip Do you remember that? Jesus Christ You have to buy the anti-skip ship baby Anti-skip They saw they so that Can you imagine if they sold

Any kind of MP3 like music playing device And they were like oh This one pauses the music sometimes Sorry So that was just a reality It's insane Anyway Let's try and find one more question

And then buck the fuck on out of here Let's go So I want to read this Because this is a this is a A grievance okay let's go this is a grievance which is very exciting I want to hear this

black china I drink her piss out of another man's balls Rodin he says and he says very long time listener new patron here I doubt this is going to get read on the show but as a fighting game developer myself

the sheer ignorance in the room when the topic is brought up infuriates me to no end let's go not even oh man not even not even getting into most of the conception surrounding frame data, games being slower nowadays, or input latency that have been

brought up in the past episodes because I'd be here all day. But for the sake of education, I just wanted to say that Chris's melee is faster than the MVMV. Oh, Marwark's Com 2 debate has been ringing in my head for months and I'm tired of arguing at a wall. This is the only reason I gave you fuckers money. We'll honor it. When it comes to determining how fast a given game is, Movement speed is typically not even in the conversation since other factors like damage and combo length slash depth have much greater impact on speed

but because you had specifically mentioned movement or specified move and speed Sweeney is correct because of something I'm surprised neither of you brought up in this debate stage size. The maximum distance a player can be away from another player is significantly smaller in MRO versus Capcom than in melee meaning every individual movement is covering more

distance in reality that we than we may perceive. Think of it as two monkeys fighting in a tiny cage. Well, I get it. It's more like frame rate. I totally understand. I get it in the sense of like FOV. Where like your FOV is tiny,

it feels like you're moving through a first person environment slower than you actually are. Right. It's widening out. I wouldn't, I wouldn't really say it's FOV. I guess FOV is just stage size. Like you don't even have to say FOV, the size of the stage. No, no, but what I'm saying, I'm not saying it's FOV.

What I'm saying is the relation that I'm making and how I know what you're talking about. I can already respond to this one thing because I feel like it is a little bit it's a little bit obtuse to ignore when we talk about speed. I understand what he means like say like what your your Fob like a death of feel like say there's a there's a perfect example of a in God of War II when you're on these chains there's these horses these steeds of time and you're when you're when you're on this long ass giant chain it starts panning out and as it's panning out it just looks like you're not even fucking moving because it's so fucking far away like it seems it's like a plane you look at a fucking. fucking airplane. Right? I get how that works. However, there's an example of like Super Street Fighter 2 Turbo. You can turn it up

the speed by point something by upping the stars. There is an actual speed that you can manipulate. Just like if you use a trainer in a game and you can manipulate the fucking speed. There are some things that are set to a specific speed.

There's a standard. And the standard in some games like Killer Instinct was fucking faster. Like to ignore that is like I said it's obtuse. Yeah, I don't know. You can manipulate.

I use trainers to manipulate this so I can fucking sometimes hurry the fuck up and sometimes it just feels better to me. I'm like, oh, I can fucking do this a lot faster. Yeah. I mean, I'm still, I'm still, I still understand in mortal, and particularly Marvel 2, like,

I don't know every character is like blitzingly fast, but particularly Wolverine. in general. It's so insanely fucking quick in that game. It's ridiculous. He's meant to be a lot faster, but not his,

and because of that, though, he's a lot weaker. Yeah, he's low-inchp. Yeah, he's low-eat-wall. It's usually, like, the faster they are, the less damage they can output. Now, Wolverine does a shit ton of damage. He does a fuck ton. I think it's just because he,

I think if you check because he can do so many combos, like, it's the equivalent of saying, like, oh, somebody doing a grab- moving move, right? That's one move, and then Wolverine hitting you like six times or something. You know what I'm saying? Because the character, the character that like was weak, but they were fast, like, Silak.

Sialak was weak but fast. He's probably so mad right now. He's probably like, he's probably so mad right now. He's probably so upset right now. He says love the show keep him the good work. He should kill yourself. But like my counters, he probably yeah, go ahead, go ahead. I will say this. Yeah.

Speed is largely very relative and in most cases is very much like an illusion. It's very much like FOV like I brought up earlier. There are people who would say like, oh, Halo 3 is a very slow game. It's like, Halo 3 is not a slow game. Halo 3 has a FOV that makes it feel slow. And so when you raise that FOV to like 120, suddenly Halo 3 is fucking blisteringly fast in comparison to 60.

And so when I'm talking about speed, I'm talking about how it feels and how it looks. I'm not necessarily talking about how fast it is because that in and of itself is depending on how it looks. And you think melee looks faster? You are not moving, you are not moving across, you are not moving across a battlefield in Halo 3 any faster on 60 than you are on, or on 70 FOV than you are on 120. The only difference is that it feels that way. And melee feels faster. I'd so strongly disagree, but I guess.

And that's, and that's really observable. Like, I feel like if you put melee in front of Marl versus, I feel like, I feel like, I feel. I really do feel like if you put Marl versus Capcom to end melee next to each other at the highest levels of play, the overwhelming majority, if not, I would bet like 90% of people would say that melee is faster. Whether or not that's true or not in the actual math is kind of irrelevant because again, this is all relative and it's all illusionary anyway. It's kind of like when you're driving and like if you're driving on like a 20 mile an hour road, 70 feels really fucking fast. But on a highway where you've just done 120, 70 feels like 20. You know, like it's, it really is just a matter of, it doesn't matter how fast something actually is. It matters how it feels.

The only time I would say there'd be an argument against that is when you stop to do a special move. Because you stop, like there's a halt. And then you do a special. But like, I really can't think of melee being fast. Like I recently got back into playing Marvel 3. Games kind of sucks. But I've been on a fighting game binge. I got, like, I re-in how to play Street Fighter.

And, like, I'm like, oh, I started playing Marvel 3 again. And that game is just so, even that game's pretty fucking fast. I'm not saying they're slow. I'm not saying, so I'm not saying they're slow. It's just, to me, the only thing compared to you, because like you said how it feels, but like, there is always the comparison, right? And the only reason people are saying that, people like myself is because of the games I grew up with. Playing, um, the original, the original street fighter.

felt fine to me, of course. It felt fine because that was the only, I had nothing compared to. Once Super Shoot Fighter 2 Turbo came out and you were able to, I put the speed all the way up and I fucking loved it. And because of that, it kind of ruined the experience of other games for me because I'm like, oh, I just like how fast this feels. Because it just, it's something that feels like maybe I was just, I don't know if people just couldn't keep up or something, but I just loved that speed. It's like, for example, when, like, say, there's that, there's that raid. When I started playing Raid back in 2019, it starts off on just 1X be normal. But then once I discovered that there's a 2x, I never went back because now 1X literally feels like they're underwater to me.

And I mean like underwater. I'm not even fucking around where I'm watching this shit. And I'm like, this is crazy. This is so fucking slow. How the hell did I even play it like this before? So that's kind of how I feel like that when I go from Marvel versus Capcom to or say Killer Instinct. to, I try to play the new killer instinct recently, and it's just like, even though a lot of people really enjoyed it, it's not what I played Killer Instinct for.

I played it mainly for the speed. The new Killer Instinct, you still? The Vastal amount of, uh-huh. Because the Killers are you, like, you're still fast in that game, but it's more like comboing, like how long your combos go on. Well, see, but that's the thing. See, that's the one thing that they still kept, like, you can do way. The combos is insane how many commas you can do, how the length of them.

but the thing that really sold it for me was oh I just did a 13 hit combo in like three fucking seconds like in the old games let's be four like four to five seconds you're like oh 13 hits where it's like that is say for example I'm playing mk1 or now I'm really enjoying it for me to do a 13 hit combo is almost like okay it's closer to like eight seconds or something it's more it's like a reasonable speed I still enjoy it but I'm just

I loved the fucking speed. And when we're talking about this, you know, the gentleman that wrote in is that's, that's the only thing that I'm really talking about is that I feel like there is a standard that is set because of online gameplay that games can't be that fast

because it's just a little bit too fast for it being like a standard. And like, that's just my opinion. And I don't think depths of field or anything in like a fucking Mortal Kombat or anything like that. that is really going to change it. It's just,

it's just set specifically to a certain type of speed. And I'm not even, I'm like, just, I've, I, there's no cope. I'm fine with it because obviously I still play fighting games.

It's not like, I'm protesting. But, uh, I, I just feel I'm like, well, sounds a little obtuse if you're not going to acknowledge that.

That like, Marvel's Capcom 2 is clearly much faster than three or any fucking thing else. And then as far as, uh, but can, what you're saying about melee and all that stuff, or anything else in the,

the, I think that does. You can't directly compare them. Yeah, it's hard. They're very, very different games. I'm just, like, they feel, like, and I think it really is just the ability to run in the way that you can in melee, and, like, by itself kind of increases, like, the speed of it to me, because the fact that I can run across an entire fucking battlefield, like a ninja, and just fucking sweep under.

But so many of the characters are slow with shit in melee. That's what, I'm just, there's something that's not adding up. Let's just, it's something is, like, what do you mean? Falcon is fast in melee. Fox is fast. Falcos not fast. Bro, if you watch, what I'm saying is like, if you watch, here's what I'm saying, really, from the base, from the basest example of it. When you watch like a really high level competitive game of melee, it looks like fucking Dragon Ball Z, man.

You can't see what the fuck is happening. People are like bouncing across the fucking stage and they're like doing all this weird shit. They're teleporting, they're zigzagging, they're sliding under each other. And it looks insane. Right, yeah. So I can understand how that looks Because like for melee, right, like melee has some of the fastest inputs

Where like to wave dash, WaveShine somebody, that's one frame. You have to do that in one frame To get it off correctly. So I can understand how... There's also more of a stage. It's in the same way that like, you know, like in a 2D, you know,

Street Fighter game, it's really just the same... Like it's really just a flat level. And I'm not saying that Smash doesn't have that either. The most competitive high level smash is on that flat level. But there's also, there's just movement there in a way that's different. Like you're not, you're not seeing people sprint across. You're not seeing people get like juggled in the same way. It's just a very different experience.

I'm not saying it's like fucking molasses and it's like the slowest thing you've ever seen. I'm just saying like when I watch a high level competitive game of Street Fighter, I can follow it very easily. When I watch a high level competitive game of, you know, Marvel versus Capcom, I can follow it. Like, it's not, it's not something that is particularly tricky to analyze. But melee, it's like, if you blink for a second, you lose your place. And that's just, that's just the chaotic nature of melee also. I think it's simple because I played melee so much. That's why.

Well, you playing that, that does absolutely factor into it. Yeah, I was just like, uh, so much. Because I played melee, I still play melee competitively. And like, I didn't, it's fast. It is definitely the fastest smash bros game by far. But it didn't, it doesn't feel like blisteringly fast. I just wonder if you used, it's like that project. I wonder if you felt any different when you first played melee, if you had any, like, if you remember it all that it felt significantly faster or anything.

It felt slow when you can adapt pretty easily. Is that one? Yeah. But that was like 2001. Actually, no, no, no, no, no. It did feel fast. You're just an anomaly. I don't know.

Because I remember when I played for a play, I didn't know what the fuck's going on. I was like, what the hell? Yeah. I was getting punched and tossing shit. If the dude wants to ride in again and say, if he wants to refute what I say, I would be interested in hearing that

because I just feel like that does play a factor into it because of being able to, you know, let's say when I use trainers, I manipulate the speed. So I don't see why developers couldn't just set it to a specific speed faster for somebody like me to enjoy games at a faster

pace. You know, because frames, because even the frames and stuff like that, they're all still going to be, all that shit's still going to happen, but just faster, right? So, like, if this one light punch is done in, like, a single frame or something, it's still going to be done a single frame, but it's going to be done faster. You know,

because you set the game speed a little bit quicker. That's what I'm talking about. This dude, this dude is fastening a noose right now. I wonder, like, I wonder, because I want to say, like, I would love to be like, okay, please tell me how I'm very, I'm very curious about that.

Yeah, yeah. Yeah, like, not even saying, like, I'm not even saying that I'm right. I just feel like that, I think I'm onto something, but hey, please, please take a dump on my, my theory, I don't mind. All right, and we'll round it out with this. Loudmouth wrote in, he says, not a question, but I'd like to see Derek do a Jordan Peterson recreation of Dracula flow. That's it.

That's all he wrote. That would be very, very, that would be very, very. very fun. I don't have the best Jordan people. Well, it's okay. He's kind of hard to do. It's been a while. I for some reason back in a,

because there's this, I was playing GT Online and I was just doing his impression, like as if he was playing. And it was pretty good. And I, but I think it was because I was so not thinking about it. Yeah. Yeah.

And so now, like, you kind of have to, you kind of have to, like, half the effort. Right. But it's hard to do it because it's such a,

like inherently, it's a Kermit voice, but you can't go to Kermit with it because otherwise it just doesn't sound like him, it just sounds like Kermit. So it's like, it's really hard. It's hard to do enough of a Kermit to sound like Jordan Peterson, but not so much Kermit that you just don't set, you don't just sound like Kermit. It's, it's an annoying, I don't know, man, you got to have a lot of vocal control to do it well, I think. Yeah. Yeah. That sounds funny. That sounds fun. That sounds fun. Yeah. It's not, yeah. It's, it's frustrating. I wish I could, because I wouldn't stop, probably.

Hi. Hi. Hi. Because it's like Kermit, uh, Canadian Kermit. Hi. Hi. Hi. Jordan.

Come. Come. Come. Jordan, come. Like just, you just got to say things over and over again so you kind of get the, get it down. This shit doesn't mean nothing to me, man. Yeah. Like, I don't know.

I can't do it. Black. Black. Black. You got to kind of, you go, I, I hate, hate, black. This sounds like a remix. I mean, that's how I get my cadence down. I gotta say shit over and over.

All right, let's move on. Let's get the fuck out of here. All right, let's get the fuck out of here. Yeah, let's go. Bye, guys. Thank you guys for tuning in. Very low-key episode. And we hope, you know, if you're listening to this podcast, wherever you are,

we hope you're safe in these crazy times. I don't hope you're saying. Wishing you the best. I'm sure we have fans in areas of the world that are totally fucked right now. So be safe everyone. Be safe if everybody. Please be safe if you can. Yeah.

Yeah. Top of the morning. Oh, my God. What? You suck. You just marveled. You just marveled is what you did. You under, you undercut, you undercut like a serious little thing with like a, like,

a cut the tension joke that, you know. Yeah, very, uh... It's a very marvel of you. It's seeping into the way... It's seeping into the way you talk to people now. Was it Whedon that started that? No, it's true. It's true.

I'm gonna psychoanalyze you now. Was it Josh Whedon that started that? Was it him? Or who was it? Who's responsible for that shit? And that should be like... For what? For what?

Dron and quartered. No, go ahead. Let's not get into it. Let's get out of it. Who you're talking about? Who you're talking about? Let's get out of here. I said, I said,

I said, I said, Josh, we didn't, we, did you really? I hope you're not. We haven't. Oh, well, I mean, all right. We haven't read the names. Just use the video that I threw in there, I guess. Jesus Christ, okay. I don't know, I don't know what to.

Okay. It's just, there's no count out or anything. It's just going to cut to it. There's no, tell you what, Sweeney stopped recording. Derek will include this. Sweeney is powerless to say anything right now. Yeah. So we're just going to cut into, we're going to just repeat the previous.

I actually looked into it just in case to make sure that we could get away with that. There's no name change difference at all and there's nobody that changed. So it would be the same anyway. And we're going to record again in like two days. So that'll be more up to date. But anyway, we'll see you next time. Peace. Shadele.

Oh no. Whoa. John Guido, the fourth. I listened to every episode of the Star Tank podcast and only got was this lousy dick. Transfem and Shad in a chemistry PhD program. Revised. Seaman on a human, you assume, and I won't suck men. What I got to do to bust a nothing.

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over at patreon.com slash Star Tank. We love you. We'll see you soon.