The Snark Tank - #22: Twitch Deer Girl

Episode Date: May 21, 2020

Go to manscaped.com and get 20% off + free shipping with the code: SNARKTANK #manscapedpod SNARK TANK MERCH ► https://teespring.com/stores/snark-tank A girl who thinks she's a deer has a power trip on Twitch. Why is the internet up in arms? Can reptiles be funny? What would be the worst way to die? What movies deserved sequels but didn't get them? Would you rather be an NPC in Crazy Taxi or GTA Online? What's a worse curse? Looking like, or talking like Jar Jar Binks? Hi, my names is Omry. I write the descriptions for The Snark Tank. I can't leave. The locks are on the outside and this is my only shot to reach out. Chris doesn't pay attention to these. Please, send assistance. I'm located at cedwoiku;wlcnfkjc Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

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It really helps us out. Hey, look, he's a little dead meme. I don't need a meme. You can fuck us me What I'm always is. Hey. I hope it's great. I mean, gosh.

Hey, everybody. Welcome back to the Snark Tank podcast. It's us. The same people it always is. Yeah. Unfortunately. It's me again. Yeah, it's us.

It's us. Nobody different. No, nothing new. We're in a health game. It's always going to at least be us, no matter what you guys try to do. We're always going to be here. But hey, no matter how much you want us dead or buried or locked in sarcophagy, sarcophagus is? Sarcofficuses.

Sarcofficuses. It's not sarcophaguses, is it? I think it is. I don't know if it. Who's ever used that plurally? Archaeologists? Egyptians? Maybe.

I guess. I mean, I don't. don't know man i don't know all i know is that do you think there's anyone listening to us that actually wishes us dead or something or they they want to kill us probably maybe probably i like not i would i would like to assume that like that people who listen to the show like it we've been seeing a lot of um actually i don't know if you i don't know if you've noticed but i've i've noticed a pretty huge uptick and people just uploading clips to like twitter and stuff which is pretty cool yeah yeah talking about us in general it's insane i felt i had i had a good feeling man

I had a good feeling. Last episode was, I remember laughing throughout the entire thing. And I'm like, oh, yeah. That was a good one. Yeah. I didn't, I didn't, I barely edited the last one. I, like, I started editing and I was like, fuck this. Fuck, fuck.

Fuck off. I just, I just uploaded it. There's a bunch of shit in that episode that probably, like, should not be in there, but, like, whatever. If I'm going to be real, I don't remember the last episode. I don't remember it either. I don't remember it at all. It's hard because, like, especially because I,

Sweeney and I live in the same place. It's almost difficult to remember like what we said on this show and what we just said to each other in passing. Yeah. It's very strange. That makes sense.

Yeah, because you guys are always like saying really dumb shit and fucking with each other constantly. So this is just like another day, right? This is just another day. Yeah. But anyway, we got, uh, we got some stuff.

We got some, we got some questions. We got some stuff to talk about. But also, I just want to let you guys know, The merch is up. We have some merch available. We're doing like a limited run for right now because personally I kind of want to get off of T-Spring because T-Spring is horrendous.

And their customer service is just kind of like, I don't know. But we got some shirts up there and we're going to be selling them for a little bit. We got some hoodies. We got some, you know, normal T-shirts. They look pretty good, I think. So grab them while it's up. You can get them at T-Spring. dot com slash stores slash snark dash tank that's snark tank with a hyphen in the middle it's a pretty

complicated username pretty complicated uh uh u r l but uh we will be getting a better storefront in the future so that's that's a thing if you wanted to support us you want to get some shirts i know uh clothes aren't really important right now but if you have the extra little uh extra little monies uh and you wanted some shirts you wanted some uh representation then there you go Yeah, we'd appreciate if you guys got a shirt, particularly ones that mostly have me on it. Because Chris and Derek are fine, but you guys are really here for Sween. So just get merch with mostly my face on it, or just cover their faces actually. Damn.

Yeah, just scribble over our faces in a permanent marker. Yeah, and it's leave Sweeney there. And yeah, thank you. Thank you guys for everything. So we got a, there's something going on on Twitter right now that I feel like we would be remiss. We would be remiss not to mention. Yeah.

There is an individual who I guess is on the Twitter, not the Twitter, the Twitch, what is it, trust and safety safety council or something? Or advisory council? No, you're right. You had it right the first time. Something like that.

And she went viral recently, kind of talking about how voice chat in competitive games are inherently unfair. I have a video that I'm working on this specific topic, but I saw that opinion. I was like, all right, well, this is a pretty dumb opinion. I'm going to talk about this opinion.

And I did a little bit more digging, and I guess this person is a deer. I... This is so difficult to explain. Blaine. Yep, you said it. You said it, Chris. But she was on a stream where she was like, she was explaining like all of these like opinions. And it was a lot of like 2014, 2015, like early 2016 kind of stuff. Like stuff that I, I forgot was even real for a while.

Yep. You know? It's reminiscent of the, it's remnants of really, really Gamergate. That's just the best way to put it. The type of stuff that was being said. Yeah, I don't like bringing that up just because it's such a dead horse, and I kind of hate hearing about it, like four years, six years after it happened. But this really does seem like just like one of those, like, Breonna Wu came out of the woodwork talking about like, I agree. And it's like what is going on?

It feels like this, it feels like we're just on a repeat cycle every four years, where every four years the same exact stuff happens. The president gets really... The person has to be president gets snubbed out of the election and then gamers are automatically prejudiced and bad people again. Same shit all the time. Well, yeah. Well, the thing is, it's like

you have the same exact situation with Bernie, again, getting screwed over by the DNC. You have Donald Trump being forced to run against some corporate, unpopular husk of a human being. And you have like all of this extra shit. You have like

a bunch of celebrities dying. I don't know. where just like in rapid succession, you have now this kind of like other kin level stuff. And it's just like what is going on? I feel like we're just, I feel like we're in a GIF. Oh my God. We're just in this weird looping image of this forgotten meme.

You can't convince me that we're not in a simulation. Yeah, because it really does feel like a, you know, they say, smart people say that, that I don't know which smart ones, but I've heard that it's more probable that we are in a simulation than not, which is kind of interesting to think about. What are you talking about?

I mean, exactly what I said. It's just the way that they calculate things. It's kind of like, say, the theory of a multiverse. It just mathematically, mathematically, it makes sense. Like, that's another thing, that there is multi-universes because it doesn't make sense for there to only be one based on of just the numbers and how the universe even works within itself. And so I think they've also calculated to the point where it seems like the idea of a simulation,

it seems much more probable than not. So a lot of people that are really fucking smarter, like, yeah, it's definitely possible that this shit's happening. And we've at a certain point figured out how to replicate like a life that everyone believes is real, but it's not or something. And it feels like we're going to get fucking inception and do that again. Because like we're going to get to a point where we're all like just, right? Like we're just, we figured out how to do virtual reality perfectly

and now we have the perfect simulation. But now we're just deeper. We're like, new game plus two? Yeah, new game plus. Derek, I never thought in my life I would hear you say some wild shit like that. That is the most. insane thing I've ever heard come out of your mouth. That's not, see,

that weren't in a simulation. What? How is that more insane than, say, for example, a vast majority of the world believing that there's a Skydad that's watching you jack off? Yeah, you know what? That, you're right. You're right about that. That's true.

But the simulation thing is so fucking, that's like macro-minded shit for me. And like, I don't know. I can't get my brain to open up that much that there's a simulation. Like, I don't got time. I could believe that. might as well be true. We were talking about, we were talking about like a little bit before we started

the podcast where it's like, if, if I haven't seen something with my own eyes, like it is a very good possibility to me that it's like, okay, well, this is either completely true or completely false and like I'm totally fine. I accept either one of those things. Yes. Like, it's, it's totally fine. Like if somebody, if somebody were to tell me, if somebody were to tell me that like, I don't even know, like, Peter Pan was a real kid. You know, I'd be like, Like, yeah, probably. All right, that sounds fine. Whatever.

If someone ran up on stage and pulled Hillary Clinton's face off and it revealed it to be like a fucking the devil, I'll be like, oh, well, I guess that makes sense. What if, what would you do if somebody ran up to Hillary Clinton on stage? She's giving her speech. She just took a sip of her water and she just spat out a little egg into her glass like she normally does. And then somebody ripped, somebody grabbed her face and tore it off and it was you. It was your face. And then like, and then like for me viewing me. it. I'm viewing it from my house, but then I'm there at the place, at the time when the face is removed.

Yeah, yeah. It's like a, it's like a dual camera feed where like one eye is, one eye is where you are and the other eye is where Hillary Clinton is. I would be really confused to say it at least. And then I'd be like, was I fucking Bill Clinton? Did Bill Clinton cheat on me? You piece of shit, you fucking cheated on me. Would you, would you embrace one side over the other? Would you embrace being underneath Hillary? Clinton's skin? Or would you want to go back immediately to your normal kind of pathetic life?

Oh, dude, give me the fucking blue pill, man. Give me the fucking blue pill. Are you kidding me? I don't know, man. I don't want that. I don't know. I want to go back to my regular life at that fucking point.

That is, I'll take all the blue pills. Are you serious? Like, that's... All of them. What would you do, though, if you went back to the blue pill and then you woke up and then everybody was you? What does that mean? Yeah, it means you wake up

and you call your, you FaceTime, your, your mom. and dad and they're both you. They're you, but they're calling you son? Yeah, it's like, how's it going, son? How's it going, son? How's it going, son? We miss you. I feel like my brain would shatter.

Because I'd be like, what the fuck? Everyone's me? Am I everybody? Can I control everyone? Is my particular way of thought different from everybody else's? See, I would feel like I was... See, I would feel like things are finally the way they should be. Oh, really? Really.

No, that'd be a fucking nightmare. I'd probably die. Not even just like out of sheer suicide. suicidal like desire. I feel like I would, I would just short circuit almost. Dude, that's like, that's something you can't reconcile. No way. Absolutely. Exactly. I would, I would. It's like, imagine you having sex with a lady and if he turns over and it's you. It's you. You're like, what? Like, what am I doing right now? What's happening? That's scary. But hey, man, at least you're not a deer. Yeah, honestly.

That, that's, at least you, I would rather, yeah. I would rather go through all those scenarios that you just introduced. than be a fucking deer. No, dears fucking suck. Deers are the fucking worst. That's the thing, too. It's like, I don't want to harp too much on this person because I think it's pretty obvious that she's not mentally all. I mean, come on, dude.

Sure, sure. Like, you can't, at a certain point, we have to be like, I get it that we have to be nice and we have to be kind. We have to understand that people are going through some crazy shit. We have to understand that people's, you know, mental states are, like, different. But at a certain point, you can't expect me to think that a person who admits to like, oh, yeah, you know, sometimes I act like a deer and I prance around in my backyard and I eat grass off the ground. You can't convince me that that's not something that is hilarious. It is.

Like, that is just objectively a funny thing for an adult human being to do. Look, it is, there is certain things that are, there are certain things that are off limits, right? We don't laugh at people with like down syndrome. We don't laugh. You know, like there's certain things that you're born with and you're like, there's no reason to make fun of somebody for that. But when it comes to something like that sort of mental illness, like there's people that legitimately believe that they're Jesus or they're Michael Jackson,

I'll make fun of those people. Like it's because it's just crazy and it's silly. Just like this chick thinking she's like fucking flame stag from Mega Man X2. Like it's just like, sorry. What the fuck? What? You're not fucking, you're not a deer. I'm sorry.

It's silly. The thing is, too, of all the animals to choose, man, deer are just relentlessly awful. They're just, they're enormous, like, Olympic gymnast rats that just jump really high. They jihad themselves into cars on the highway every chance they get on fucking ticks. Deers are fucking garbage, man. They're really garbage. They're fucking the worst. Yeah.

You know, obviously nobody would have cared about. this person. I think the only thing that really brought, because all that other kin stuff exist on Tumblr or wherever, but since she's a part of the trust and safety council Twitch and people have so many issues with Twitch and it wasn't even the dear thing. When I saw the deer thing, I thought that was just weird and it kind of made me cringe, but it was something else like she was saying like, oh, I think a lot of you gamers are white supremacist, I don't like white supremacy. And then she was like, it's a fact that I feel this way. And it was just like a weird, I'm like, what is this man? That's, that also just, the, the whole

reason this person was trending at all is because she was talking about like, uh, voice chat in video games being unfair, specifically in the context of, uh, heroes of the storm or something. I'm in the middle of making a video about that specific part of the argument. Uh, and I was the same thing with you. I was just like, I just thought this was a dumb opinion. And then I looked into it. I saw, I found the deer stuff. And now I just, I'm just baffled and confused. I hate them. I hate him. I hate them. I hate deers, man. I can't... The last episode, we spoke about other kids.

We brought it up. We did. And I was just like, look, as much as furries have rafed me and upset me in my life, furries are not other kids. They're not that. They're just like one step away, though, aren't they? I swear to God, I forgot. I forgot about him.

It's been so long since I even thought about that word or even, like, saw something like that. Like, sometimes I'll have, like, a nice nostalgic flashback of that, that documentary on TLC or whatever the hell it was where the kid was like on all levels except physical I am a wolf you know and I get a good like laugh out of it but I haven't thought about that in years and then I see this this woman on the Twitch staff

having like somebody scratch her head and then her like basically like faking an orgasm on a live stream and it's just like what is this is just so strange this is beyond the pale I feel like It's just like, you, you can't, you cannot expect me to not find that strange. Like, I don't care how progressive you are.

Like, I don't care, like, how accepting you could be as a human being. I happen to think I'm pretty left-leaning as well. But, like, I can't. Is there no line to be in like, okay, this is, this is kind of, I don't know if she should lose a line, bro. I don't care. I don't give a shit. I don't give a fuck.

There's a line. Hold on, hold on, shut up. I don't know if, I don't know if she should lose her job or anything because it's not, it's not really that relevant to, like, her job. It's just strange. And I saw a lot of people being like, oh, anybody who, like, thinks this is weird or is, like, poking fun at this, just doesn't know what it's, just doesn't know what it's like to have physical intimacy or something like that. And it's like...

What? What? Yeah, like, when she's getting her head scratched or something and, like, people were, like, kind of poking fun at it. She's like, people who are making fun of this have no... I've never experienced, like, true intimacy. And it's like, no. That is so fucking dumb. That's such a stupid.

That's such a stupid fucking statement. It really was a stupid. And I'm not saying the majority of people are saying this, but, like, it was one thing that just caught me off guard where I was just like, is this something that's expected to be the new normal? It will, come on. Never. Like, the reason why it's so strange is because we have a frame of reference.

Like, yeah, good point. Like, literally, it's, it's, what? Does it understand intimacy? I don't. know. Everything about that, everything about this is just so next level strange that I just, it's almost hard to even wrap your head around everything that's weird about it. All this stuff has always existed, but it's always been underground. And it just weirds us out when this stuff peaks into the mainstream. And it'll never not weird us out. It'll never be just completely

socially acceptable because of how fucking stupid it is. It's just plain and simple. It's not even like being mean because I don't really care if that dear broad wants to be fucking weird. I don't care at all. Yeah, yeah. It has no effect on anyone but her. Yeah. But like when I see it from time to time, I am absolutely going to point and laugh. Like that's never not going to happen.

Oh my God. It's fucking weird. It's strange, man. It's just, it's abnormal, you know? I'm not a man to make fun of most people, you know? Like, if you're just strange, I'm just going to look at you weirdly, then keep it pushing. I'm not going to really spend time caring about it. but that shit is weird

that shit is fucking weird you're not a deer I hate that shit I hate it like I hate dears especially man they're fucking garbage do you think you would be

do you think you would do you think the deer aspect of this makes it worse for you definitely me it's personal that's why like if it was like if she was like I'm a fish glub glub

and I like swim around in a pool and I pretend to be brain damaged do you think that I'd be like that's stupid but I wouldn't hate this much because it's deer I really really have a fucking hankering of anger towards it.

Like, I just, man, I can't stand them. Yeah. Like, there's certain animals that would be pretty funny. Like, say if she was like a fucking possum. Yeah, yeah, or like a pygmy marmoset or something. If you were a cute animal or a funny animal, that'd be fine. But you are neither. No, I want...

It's a funny animal. A funny animal? Yeah. Sloths are funny. Fucking little bears are funny. Like, some animals are funny. Little bears? Little bears are hilarious how they roll around and shit.

You don't think that's funny? I mean, Q, I never really thought funny. I would use the word funny. Like, he-he-hee, that's kind of funny. Animals aren't funny. Some animals are pretty funny. Like, if she was an elephant, that'd be cool. Elephants are great.

They're fantastic creatures. Are elephants funny? Not so much. They're, you know, they're likable. They're fucking great at stand-up, bro. Yeah. Oh, my God. Like funny mannerisms, not like fucking

comedically funny like a person. I'm not talking about... But every animal has the capacity to have a funny mannerism. That is literally not true. That is exceptionally true. That's not true. Even crocodiles get funny. That's literally what I was thinking and that's not true.

Reptiles are not funny because they look so fucking ridiculous. You've never... You literally explained a reason why they're funny. But you've never seen that video of like the crocodile tearing the arm off the other crocodile and the crocodile just turns to the camera and goes like, the fuck. Chris, that's not funny. That was like, what's a knee slapper right there?

That was shocking. I was like, holy shit, these animals kill each other. That's funny, man. I'm sorry, that's hysterical. He doesn't care. I don't think the funny's the word. I think shocking is the word. Sometimes they definitely intermingle.

That's what, that's, that's definitely a true occurrence. Well, horror and comedy are pretty close. Yeah, they're pretty damn fun. They're pretty, they're cousins. Yeah, they're both just. different ways to surprise you. That's pretty true. Crocs are not funny.

Iguanas aren't funny. Fucking bearded dragons aren't fucking funny. There's nothing laughable about them. It's funny how they dive there in a cold for too long. That's kind of hilarious. Hold on. I don't understand you. So ripping the arm off of a crocodile and it turning to the camera as if it's like on a

fucking sitcom isn't funny. But an iguana just dying in the cold is funny to you? You're such a warped human being. It's kind of laughable, but it's not funny. Also, you never saw an iguana run? They're hysterical when they run. They flop around like weird like like like, like it's like I don't think it's funny. I really don't think reptiles are funny.

Like reptiles are really not funny creatures. I mean, you're eating very young. I mean, you're pretty funny. You're kind of religiously. You're pretty funny. You know what I mean? You think I'm a reptile? Yeah, you fucking lizard.

You really just broke my heartness now right now, man. You fucking hurt me. You snake in the grass. You're bald-blooded weirdo. I'm not. cold heart. My heart is warm. I didn't say cold hearted. I said cold-blooded. I'm not cold-blooded either. My blood warm. Warm blood.

Nah, you're pretty fucking scaly. Me not eat you. Me blood warm. I watched, Derek, this is a, this is just between you and me. Just between you and me on a fucking podcast. Continue. Sure. Sure, I'm listening. I think he's, I think he can't hear us now. But like, just between you and me. Sure. I watched him lick his own eye when a fly landed on it. It's pretty, it's pretty shocking.

I didn't say anything. I'm still fucking here. I'm here. Hey, what's up? Hey, man. You're the fucking worst, man. I'm going to get you. He's got, he's going to fucking eat you whole like a fucking snake.

No, I'm just going to fucking be on top of your fucking ceiling like an iguana looking at you while you're sleeping. I genuinely, I genuinely wish I could like unhinge my jaw the way that, the way that a snake can. So you can. It's very intimidating. It's very intimidating. You don't, it is intimidating. You don't enjoy eating. Wait, for what purpose?

So I could suck on one of those Ed Nettie jawbreakers. I was going to say something similar to that, but not exactly that. It's going to say that very similar to that. But not quite the same thing. So you could fit like a whole tit in your mouth? Nah.

That's actually pretty awesome. You'd be like, hey, baby, watch this. And your jaw clicks down. And you look like that stretched out image of the nostalgia critic screaming. Oh my God. Like the screaming man? Yeah.

She just filled with so much pleasure when her entire. your tit is in your fucking mandible I'm so fucking happy I'm so fucking happy this whole titty's in my mouth fucking ariola's

dipping into your stomach acid let's move on to the question there's something funny about something dipping in the stomach acid like it's just like shit stomach acid is really far away from everything that can get inside you for the most part

yeah it's just so far down your throat that it's just so it's comedic that anything could possibly could possibly reach there without while also still being connected to the outside world. You ever been like eating like a slice of pizza with like really like stringy cheese and then like there's like a part of cheese that's like really like deep in you already but it's like still in

your mouth a little bit because the straight the cheese is so fucking stringy? And you're like what the fuck is happening? It's just too much. I'm overdoing it. I got to slow down. It's just an uncomfortable feeling. Kind of panicky. You are both as deep inside of my body as possible and also just hanging out outside. Get the very. You were all you were at the exit and interest at the same time. Must be how women feel. Hey, oh. Yeah.

I guess. What are the questions? Mr. Ninja Fox 117 wrote in. Yeah. He says, hello, you lovely boys. What is some junk food you've decided to give up? This year I decided, this year I gave up on soft drinks in favor of water. Have you given up any deliciously addictive poison?

What the other does not eat anymore? I tried several times to stop drinking Snapple, but it just doesn't work. It doesn't work. I get withdrawals, like literally. That's weird. You shouldn't. I know, I shouldn't. It's the caffeine in it. You're a fucking addicts, you lose it. You can just have other things with caffeine.

Definitely, yeah, 100%. But coffee doesn't do it. Like, I can't even find, like, a good supplement for it. It's like a real problem. For me, I try to give up juice all the time. I try to go long periods without juice And then I get juice And I go on the fucking bender again

Because I fucking love it What kind of juice? Like that is such a fucking white spectrum of shit I love orange juice So the fuck is wrong with orange juice It's fucking crazy acidic man It is actually super acidic Like insanely acidic

I love it Like it definitely fucking lining in my stomach But like so what? It's so good The mango orange juice It's divine Dude I had a I had a friend of mine

Who would brush his teeth and drink orange juice on purpose because you like the taste of that better than like normal orange juice fucking psychopath What? The alien taste? The taste that is like

most notorious for being objectively bad to the to the majority of human palettes I've never heard you would call it alien taste Is that even Wait what were you said

What did you say? Did you say Didn't you say alien taste Sweeney? Yeah because it's fucking It tastes fucking incorrect It's like what is this Yeah, you should never drink an orange flavor to anything and taste what you taste when you drink orange juice after you've brushed your teeth. It's just like a really jarring.

It's like biting into like a cupcake and it just like, oh, it turns out it's a brand muffin. It's like one of those. Or it's just like, wow. The expectation versus reality here was so, so drastically off-kiltre. It tastes alien, dude. Like fucking Far-Ralm shit. So, I don't know. I'm going to have to.

I'm going to have to eventually, actually probably even starting tomorrow, I have to give up French fries because that's my kryptonite. I just fucking love fries so much. And that's the one thing that I just always go back to when I know I shouldn't be eating it. And so that's basically, I have to do that. And one thing I gave up years ago because I rediscovered them, there were the 3D Doritos. What?

Yeah, so 3D Doritos. was something that came out when I was a kid, and I loved them. And then they took them off the shelf, and then I was bitching about it probably like six years ago. And then some asshole was like, hey, faggot, they still sell them in Mexico. And so I found this thing called My Mexican Pantry. And they had a warehouse at Chula Vista. And then so I bought like three boxes of them that had, you know, at least like 20-something bags in each of the boxes. Oh, my God.

And the ingredients they use over there were, like, there was much more, like, starch and shit in it. And it just, I think I gained, like, probably, like, 10 pounds just from eating those. And I was like, okay, I can't do this anymore. But they're delicious, though. I totally understand that. That makes perfect fucking sense to me. We're, like, if you have something that, like, you loved as a kid that's just, like, gone now and you find a warehouse full of that shit, like, your duty as a human being is to stock up on that shit. because you know

how how what's the word how fickle the existence of that substance is Exactly That could just be taken away from you At any given moment

Exactly Yeah you must Absolutely Yeah dude Like even just something like With glass naples Like I fucking hoard them If I had a car dude

I'd fill that shit with I'd fill it It's nothing but glass apple Because they're so fucking hard to find Yeah Actually the liquor store right down the street for me They didn't have the lemon T1, but they have the peach one.

Yeah, I know. They always do that here. They have the fucking peat. Everybody here loves peach over lemon for some reason. I think it's, I think lemon is just more of like a Caribbean Spanish thing because I assumed, like when I left New York, my assumption was, oh, they're probably going to have

lemon flavor over there because it's also Hispanic. Yeah. I don't know why I thought that way, but it made sense to me. And then I got here and it's just like, beach, beach. I remember I was like driving with Jaylen. here from New York. We were driving across the country and we stopped. I stopped

every time we had to get gas. I went to the gas station and looked for it. They didn't have it. All they had was peach and I got so fed up one day because I walked into this like gas station. We were like taking a break and we were filling up the car and we were getting something to eat and I got a lemon tea for the first time ever. Like I found like a gas station that had the lemon snaples and I walked up to the guy and I was like, yeah, let me get one of these. And then he was like, oh, these are pretty good. Have you tried the peach?

And I was like, you got to fuck right off. You don't even understand what you're playing with right now. I honestly, like, I don't know. Like, I don't know. Both of those are so intrinsic to me. I don't really know which one is the, like, regular one. I know my grandmother preferred the lemon ones, too. But I don't know.

Lemon's just the default. Like, it's the one that's on the truck. Like, it's the default flavor. It would be like, um, it would be like if nobody sold white rice, you know? Like what? I guess. I feel you. Yeah.

You always want to add a little bit of limit to your tea. It just makes sense. Yeah. It just makes sense. You're right. That's true. Even the hot ones. Yeah.

Yeah. Especially the hot ones. It's just like such a strange thing to just not. I don't want to get into a fucking. Chris, you should learn how to make sample. Like to actually make it. I actually did think about it.

Because it is just tea. You just brew it. But I don't know what's, there might be a specific kind of thing you got in it. But like, you could definitely learn how to do it. It's not hard. Dude,

do they have, Last thing, do they have maybe even packets of Snapple Tea? Just like, dude, there you go. That's what I started doing for Taco Bell. Like, they started selling their seasoning. So I was like, instead of buying like rotten meat, like, you know, their rotten meat, like, you fucking, you get like some really good shit and add the seasoning. And it's like infinitely better. It's ridiculous.

Yo, I never even thought about that. That's a great, that is a great premise. I forgot that they even sold like seasoning that, like, seasoning that are specific. to like, because I remember now that I think about it, like, you could get, like, chicken fry recipes at home. Like, or I remember they were selling, like, the chicken fry, like, uh, seasoning and, like, the meat, like, separately at, like, supermarkets. Back when, like, I was a kid and they were, like, but obviously I'm a child. I'm not going to buy something that I have to make. But, uh, yeah, talk about seasoning with, like, actually good meat must be fucking bomb.

It's phenomenal. Maybe. You could probably make some really bombed fucking tacos with that. Yeah. I would make fucking nachos all the time, dude, like, huge. platters and stuff. Fucking amazing. Dude, because that's like the biggest problem with like fast food

is that it's like it tastes amazing but like the quality of the shit that you get is just like such garbage. It's like a day from spoiling before they cook it. Crack addled flavor.

Yeah, I would highly recommend people do that shit. It's well worth it. Even if you don't really like to cook you'll taste to like oh wow. I'm, I've been eating fucking

trash meat all these years and now like I can get some you can just get like organic meat right? and that's grass fed. And then you just add the Taco Bell seasoning. And you're like, oh, this is how I should be eating. It's liberating, dude.

It's a fucking new experience. That's a whole, like, that's a branching point for civilization. That's a glow up right there, bro. Yeah, without a doubt. Let's see. Winthropy rode in, or Winthrop, or Winthrop, I assume. Hey, Frozone who ate too much Frozone who didn't eat enough and syndrome

Jesus Christ Okay, so we're all just bullies, man You're all just bullies, I don't like you I don't know who's, I guess I'm frozen I ate too much 100% Yeah, I guess I mean, I'm pretty thick too

So whatever Yeah, I thought it's just mean This is I didn't like honestly look guys I I'm made a stone like most shit doesn't affect me but that kind of hurt my feelings, man. Like, I don't, I don't know. I don't know if I feel okay about that. You got called the cool characters from, from the Incredibles, though,

and I got the fat, big-headed white idiot who dies. Yeah, you got the, you got the, you got the, the most gruesome way possible. You got the one that kid called an... You're going to die, so it's fine. You got the one that kid called an inward. Not me, though. I'll actually be safe. I'll actually be safe.

Inward. Inward syndrome. Good? My serious questions, in the past have been ignored, so clearly y'all are looking for bullshit. We are, we are indeed looking for the most part, yes, we are. On that note, out of the three of you,

who do you think would be the biggest little bitch and be the first to break under torture? Waterboarding, ripping your nails off, repeated viewings of the new Star Wars trilogy, choose whatever poison you like. The Star Wars one would be not good for me. So listen, I have no shame in admitting that I would rather die immediately than be put in any amount of duress,

you know, under any amount of duress that you would find in a kidnapping torture scenario. If you're going to rip my fingernails off, just shoot me in the head. This is already, like, taking such a bad turn that I just don't want in anymore

at this point. Like, just fuck it. Like, I would definitely tap out immediately. I would, I think I would survive pretty long in torture. Like, I'm not saying I would endure it entirely, but, like, I've been hurt so many times that, like, I think I could deal with,

like, my nails coming off, being pulled off, like, I can deal with that. Ooh. Waterboarding, I don't know. I would get scary because I'm afraid of the ocean, so I might start tripping out. Good, here's the thing, though, like, the second, it's not really about whether or not you'll be good during it.

It's about, like, afterwards when you're all, like, fucked up and scarred. And also, like, just, like, I know this just from stuff that I've been through where, like, I dislocated my knee a couple times. And now I just have, like, severe apprehension about my knee. Like, anytime my knee touches something weird, I'm, like, always, like, I'm kind of freaking out a little bit internally about it. So, like, if you got your, like, fucking fingernails ripped off, think about, you'd never be able to scratch yourself again.

You'd never be able to, like, pick up a penny off the ground or, like, pick up a quarter off a flat table. It would, it would fuck with you so drastically. And it would just, like, impact you in, like, such subtle ways, but subtle and frequent ways. You know what's crazy? It's just, like, not worth continuing. You know, it's crazy. You brought that up. Ever since I broke my ribs, I hug people below them now.

Like, I hug people low. Like I put my shoulders below their shoulders Because I don't even squeezing me in my ribs That's actually hilarious Because your body learns that like this is a weak point Oh protect Put it Yeah protect this point

Well it's the reason why It's the reason why somebody could Tell you to your face I'm gonna pretend to hit you in the nuts And you're still gonna flinch Yeah You just you can't help but do it Even if you 100% know it's coming

So yeah It's there's certain things That your body tries to protect you from but however your body does you know try to be resilient and let you move on from certain traumatic instances it's one of the reasons why like say for example uh women kid birth right they they have a kid and it's like that's probably one of the horrific things like your fucking vagina getting torn and all that stuff and then they just like completely forget about it like a month later and they're like oh yeah i want i want to do that again i want horrific for them exactly

that's a little differently because you know because we're engineered to be doing that because we're creatures. We're supposed to replicate. You know, in birth, I know it sucks, but, like, that's kind of like a, they're women, like, people are hardwired to want to do that. But, yeah, I'm saying, like, that's a little bit of an outlier. But we're hardwired also to forget, like, say, of those,

that type of trauma that is experienced to your body. You know what I'm trying to say. Yeah, yeah, you're, you're, you're right. But also, like, we're just, we're not, like, we're not seals, you know, we're not, like, seal team. Yeah. Oh, fuck, no. We've undergone like torture, resistance, like, training or anything like that.

We're just, we're going to be fucked up. We never be able to take a shower again because we just remember all the fucking waterboarding. It fucking rains and I start freaking out. Yeah, I don't think, yeah. I would just, listen, man, if I'm in a chair, like, if I'm strapped in a chair and somebody's like, I'm going to cut your fucking toes off unless you give me the information. I'm like, all right, yeah, what do you need? Yeah, I'll give you anything you want, man.

I'll give you a fuck. I'll give you anything you want. And then I'll actually straight up kill myself. No. I'll be like, you just shoot me after this. I would literally shoot my own tongue down my throw and kill myself. Just drool and choke on your own tongue. You're that's possible.

Yeah. People have seizures that happen to. That's insane. When I learned that that was like a fact of life that you could swallow your own tongue, that like, I was like terrified of my own mouth for like a month straight. Because I was just like freaking out about like the fact that that was even possible. That's so uncomfortable. You know what's crazy?

That's not even bad, bro. Imagine just having a heart attack. Yeah, your heart attacks you. Or imagine just simply having a fucking aneurysm. You can't do shit about, like, you can't really figure out when it's coming, and you can't do shit about it while it's happening. Oh, yeah. Your brain is just fucking turning off.

One of my favorite, one of my favorite Norm MacDonald bits is he's talking about, he's talking about heart attacks. He's talking about how, like, what defibrillators are and, like, how they have to use defibrillators. and like the only way to bring somebody out of a heart attack is literally to attack your heart. Yeah. Yeah. Literally.

You got to bully a heart back and it's turning on. So I was working on this big, you know, I never got around to doing the stand-up, but I was thinking about the worst ways you can die, and I landed on choking on an ice cube. Like that's got to be the worst way to die because you suffocated before it melted. like it just

That would be the most tragic thing Because you're like If it just if you just held on a little bit longer You probably would have been fine But it was just too solid Or whatever the fuck it was Yeah If you were just wearing like

Another layer of clothing You probably would have been fine If you just had a fever You would have fucking survived you idiot Why didn't you have a fucking fever? Can you imagine how fucked up it would be If you were like choking on an ice cube And then like you were like choking

You were struggling And then it started melting you're like Oh I'm good but all the water like fell into your lungs and then you drowned on dry land. Oh my God. I didn't know if you get shot in the lungs you could drown your own blood.

I didn't think you could drown your own blood. I didn't think it was possible for a long time. I was like, that's ridiculous. Did you think you could breathe blood? I didn't, like, it's, your blood is inside of you. So like when I was like nine, I was like, you can't drown your own blood. But your blood's inside of you.

You would have drowned already, you know? And then I found out that nah, if blood just gets in your lungs somehow, you're fucking drowning and I'm like oh whoa this is crazy dude the weirdest thing is internal bleeding like the blood's just like bleeding inside of you like it's like the weirdest fucking thing like

because you don't think about it but it's like blood isn't just like flowing on every single thing it's all in your veins and shits and then once it gets cut open then blood's spilling so it's like it's a weird thing when I thought about that as a kid I was just kind of thinking that like oh blood is just literally everywhere in my body and it's always...

It is for the most part everywhere, but it's most... The moving blood is in your veins and your vessels. Yeah, yeah. The vast majority. Just because a water park is a water park doesn't mean you can't flood the water park. Yeah, exactly.

You know? Yeah, true enough. It's a delicate balance of where the water should be and where it shouldn't be and how much is allowed in certain places. It's fucking weird. It is really uncomfortable. It's... When you realize how easily

you can be killed... It's so fucking ridiculous. It's pretty... You remember that show A thousand ways to die? You remember that? Yeah. Yeah.

That's the reason... That is the reason why I just... I don't move anymore. Was that... What you mean you don't move? It was a funny as shit ever where there was a fucking grounded wire just in a puddle.

And some lady took her shoes out that she went out dancing. She took her shoes off and she stepped in a puddle and she just died. Oh. That's why I don't dance. Died, bro. So you don't dance.

Like that's so fucking... wild to me that all she did was just step in a fucking puddle and she died and it's like man do you know which one still freaks me out like I actually still thinking about this somebody shot a gun in the air and then the bullet like landed miles down the road

but it hit someone in the fucking head like and that shit like I think about it because I'm like he killed them yeah yeah like somebody shot because like obviously when you shoot a fucking gun in the air the bullets got to come down somewhere and it's but it's not gonna I don't I didn't I never really like, I guess it does, but I never really thought it would come down with like bullet firing speed. I thought it would just go up and then eventually speeder out and then fall down.

No, usually, especially it depends on what type of bullet you're using too. Like say, if you're using like a slug or something where there's like a lot more weight to it. Like say, maybe it wouldn't work so well if you use like a hollow point. But there's definitely instances where people shoot guns and then they got to come down and then they kill people. And then every once in a while, like I live, I live in South Central right now. And I'm just like, man, niggas are fucking shooting all the time. And I was just like, I always think about this. Like, man, should I even fucking be walking around?

Like, I just got to get caught by a stray bullet raining down from the sky one day. That shit is so ridiculous, dude. Getting killed by a stray fucking bullet. Yeah. Not ideal. It's like being killed by a runaway fucking shopping cart. You're just walking down a hill. One day in a shopping car comes and hits you.

And you're like, what the fuck? Yeah, that'd be pretty crazy. Yeah, man. There's so many easy, like, I hate things. about it. I hate thinking about it because I just like I know it's probably like I know me thinking about it's probably the only reason I'm still around. I look both ways like six thousand times when I cross the street. I did it for a long time. And then I got violently nudged by a car and that changed the way I thought about it. It's a good idea. Man, I can't I can't stress enough.

Like I said, if I ever have kids, I was like, I can't stress enough that being a defensive driver, being defensive about anything is how you stay alive. Because usually one thing that I've learned about people getting killed in car accidents and all this shit, it usually takes two dumbasses. Like there's one idiot that usually initiates it and then there's one other idiot that's not paying attention or something. And so usually like say I've avoided, I don't even know how many I can count how many accents I've avoided by just paying attention. And where if I wasn't, like if I was jacking off or if I was texting or whatever the fuck I was doing, like I would have been in the accent as well. Jacking off while they're driving. I mean, I feel like people do that. But like,

dude, it's a common thing. Have you done that? Derek? One time. Oh my fucking God. One time, man. 2010, 2011. I know the year only because I was working in Glendale for this water meter place or I would stall water meters around the city or I would help and shit. And it was such a stressful job. And then I had to like travel 30 plus miles to get home.

I was so angry. And I was just like, dude, I just need a fucking bust nut. And I took care of it. It was actually pretty awesome. Like I get white people. You came into your fucking hand. And you were like, well, shit. I just had won it and that's out of commission.

No, I didn't. No, it wasn't that. It wasn't that. It wasn't. I actually really don't remember how I took care of that. I really don't remember the specs, but I do remember doing that and thinking that. Like, I understand why people do, like, dangerous shit. It's kind of like, say the whole roadhead thing.

Like, it's exhilarating. You know, when a girl's, like, fucking doing work while you're driving. And it's just like, wow, like, I could fucking nut and swerve off the road and kill us. is exciting. I can't. I can't. I just don't sympathize with it. I don't need any excitement in my life at all.

You're a bitch. I am totally fine sitting here and slowly wasting away until I'm fucking bones, man. No. I don't need. You need a little something, man. You need a little something. That's what's killing you inside. The only throw that I like is like guns, man.

I fucking, I don't like guns, but I also love them at the same time. Because you feel so strong shooting a gun. Like, you instantly feel like, wow, I'm waiting. more powerful than that was before. So would you... They're fun to shoot. Jack off, why you're shooting the gun?

I shot like an M-9. I shot what you called. I shot an AR. I shot like a bunch of illegal shit in Jamaica. Would you, would you jerk off while shooting a gun? That's fucking zany, bro. Whoa.

See? See? That's all we need to hear. Like, exactly. That's the fucking next frontier, bro. I wouldn't do it, but I would think about it. You fucking would do it if you owned a gun, bitch. I can already tell.

Nah, I wouldn't. If I owned a gun, I would not touch the gun. I would just have it somewhere. Well, you would go to... You wouldn't. That's some bullshit. If I shut the fuck up. You just, I feel so strong when I hold a gun. But if I owned one, I wouldn't, I wouldn't touch it.

I wouldn't touch it. Because I, because I know what happens when you have a gun. You want to use it. Well, you don't have that, you don't have that. You don't have that. Yes, I absolutely do. Absolutely do. I would never display with a gun.

That's fucking insane. How many times have you been like, yeah, I should have done my, I should have done my homework like eight years ago, but like, uh, I decided to play this destiny raid by myself instead. And then I do it. And then I do it. And then you get like, I'd, a D. No, and then I get like a

C and I'm like, fuck, and at the end of the school year, I'm like, man, I got to get a lot of A's and I do a ton of work then. That's my fucking character. That's my school character. So here's what you would do then. Here's what you would do. I would not play with a gun. Listen, other people's lives. Listen, here's what you would do. You'd bring the gun

home and you'd be like, it's okay. I don't got ammo winning. I didn't get any ammo. I just wanted the gun. Ooh, ooh, look at me. Look at how I flipped this gun around. Oh, man. I feel really strong about, oh, maybe I should go back and maybe I should go get some bullets I would not do that that's definitely not what I would do

when it comes to other people's lives I'm like oh man because I just don't want to I don't want the fucking bother I don't want to have to say I'm sorry this like let's say I was playing with a gun like me and you were playing with a gun right and I mistakenly shooting kill you I don't want to have to be like oh Mr. and Mrs. Madanaro I'm really sorry I shot your like I don't want to be that guy

because I would be furious someone trying to tell me I'm sorry they shot my son Yeah That's why I don't I was like oh man I don't want to do this That's why I don't fuck with kids That's why I don't do shit like that

I'm like I don't want to have to deal With anything other than this You don't have to deal with fucking Fucking kids to death I understand Like I don't want to deal with kids I don't want to do with fucking Like I don't want to ever have to apologize

But something happened To someone else's fucking possessions Oh yeah Like there was a time when There was a time when we had Oh I wasn't here But like there was like a party here I guess

one of our roommate's friends brought their kid and it was just like what is this kid what is this kid doing in this house like no child should be in this apartment like there's like fake guns everywhere there's like chemicals strewn about

it's like not a good place we had blades all over this house yeah we have like knives hidden everywhere there's a box cutters everywhere there's a yeah we do there's like there's a knife within arm's reach of any given point

in our apartment for sure without a doubt it's really bad We're just playing in the stereotypes But like fuck it But also But also like It didn't even register to me

That we would even have any friends Who would have friends with kids You know Like we're at that point now Where we're old enough to be like Oh fuck Don't bring your fucking kids To where I live

Fuck yeah Our friends have kids So fucking gross That are old enough to wander by the way So gross I feel like Chris is gonna Get someone pregnant next year Hey man

You know you just roll with the punches Oh shit I've definitely had scares before And I remember being just like All right I guess this is it now Who hasn't? That's a classic That's a part of being a fucking citizen

Yeah But I don't like run from it I just figure like This might as well Because it's always just something That I'm like apprehensive about And it's like Oh man I really don't want that to happen

Before it before I'm like super ready Yeah exactly But also at the same time It's like if it happens It's like all right Well that's one big Ball of stress That I just have to deal with now

I don't have to deal with it later. My only gripe is not, it's not even the kid. It's who I'm having a kid with. Oh, yeah. That's where I was like sick because I've had kids scares too, but it's like, holy fuck, like I can't even imagine raising a kid with this person. No, dude, you don't even want to start with, oh my God, bro. Yo, I've been, I've literally been like, I should just leave the country.

I thought about, I cannot be with this person. I'm going to Mexico. I can not be with this person. I cannot be with this person. I cannot be bound with them for eternity. Like, I'm just going to take the kid and go. I was going to take the kid and fucking get the fuck out of here. Can you imagine, like, the girl's giving birth to this kid,

and then you just fucking walk into the delivery room and you just be like, okay, bye, bye, bye, I'll see you later. You just take the kid and take it to leave Mexico. Just live a fucking very Mexican life. That's it. That'd be cool, man. Never tell them about America. speak English again.

I'm with it. I'm with it, man. I wouldn't even, I wouldn't even be like deadbeat because you're raising the kid. I'd be like, fuck it, man. More power to you. Yeah, man.

You're just being a real, real stand-up model citizen. I'm just taking things to my own hands and reacting accordingly, which is smart. Yeah, I don't know. That is the bigger, the bigger deal, I guess.

Oh, for sure. Like, I don't know. Even with people that I just wasn't really, it's like, all right, well, I guess I'll just figure out how to make this work, I guess. I'm just not ready for it yet Like I'm just not ready for the amount of

Like the loss of Freedom Because once you have a kid You no longer live for yourself You're living to make sure that kid survives No what are you talking about? You just plop in front of an iPad And then the iPad raises it

No Then it becomes socially awkward And like most zoomers No What it does is like you can You can give them an iPad And then they learn really cool words Like Ooooo and like Epic

And then then And then they're fine. They're learning English. I don't... I don't... I don't want my young to be like that. Like, my kids are going to be like that. Like, my kids are going to be fucked up because they're part of me.

And I'm fucking... I'm fucking tarnished. Bro, your kids are going to be worse because your kids are going to grow up like several generations after this one. Yeah. And we're on like a downward trend. We've been on a downward trend for like ever, really. I feel like your kids, you're going to have to teach them how Dexter's dad was.

Like, if you saw the show Dexter where he had to like teach him to like, like kill animals or something instead of have, you know, to satiate the the urge to kill people and shit like that. I feel like there's something. You ever seen Dexter Man? Yeah, I have, but like it's not that guy as like a killer, right? He's like a

sociopathic. Yeah, yeah. And he started off, you know, he had the urge to kill for like a long time, but his dad was like, all right, son, kill these animals. That'll, that's how we, you know, cure your urges. Is dad like that? too? No, not at all. And then it just got to a point where he's just like, I don't give

a fuck, I'm going to kill people, but I'm going to kill fucked up people. And I imagine that would be the same scenario for you and your kids. I don't want to kill people. Jesus Christ. I want to destroy shit, though. That is killing people. No, it's not. Destroings is destroying you. Killing people is killing people. If I blow up a building with no one in it, no one dies. Yeah, okay. What are the odds that the building is going to be completely vacant? I'll figure something out. Yeah, okay. You're just a shit I don't know

You're just you're terrible Just flat out You're fucking terrible You're a terrible human being Dude my heart is pure right You guys is afraid of the purity that I am Whatever Tom Sweeney walks into a fucking Ralph's

Stomps an old lady's shins into the ground And says like I have a pure heart It's okay Don't worry this is your salvation They're still bitch You would absolutely laugh at like an elderly woman who fell down and like crumbled. Absolutely. I would not.

I'd be jarred. I'd be like, I'd be like, what the fuck? And I would try to help them. But I'd be leery about helping him because I'm like, oh man, I don't want to make her feel uncomfortable by helping. Maybe I shouldn't help. I don't know. Then I would help reluctantly.

And she'd probably yell at me. And I'd be like, fuck you bitch. I'm glad you're on the ground. You would steal her plasma because you're a fucking reptilian. I'll fucking steal her eye. You'll make a great mask. He'll shed his skin and then he'll fucking crawl all over the old woman's like shambling remains.

You'll make a great mask for me. Thank you. I'll just fucking take her face. Hugger Derek wrote in. Hey, hugger Derek. Suffoo. Classic. That dude's great.

Good boy. Yeah. Greetings. Miles Morales, Black Panther, and insert Latin superhero here. Yeah, we don't even fucking have one.

So who, so who's, so who's Miles Morales? I guess I am. Isn't the Blue Beetle fucking, like, beaned up? You said I'm beaned up?

Holy shit. Is it the way? Is this name the blue beetle? I can't remember. Is Chris dead? Was that too racist that kill him? Chris, did you just say I'm beamed up? Derek, were you referring to me as beaned up?

No, is this name the Blue Beetle? Yeah, Jaime Reyes. Yeah, that's what he's beamed up. What are you talking about? But he's Mexican. Chris is Puerto Rican. Chris gets like, I don't know. Yeah, he doesn't, I mean, you can't, look, look,

let's be real about this. So whenever there's a, whenever, That's asking for too much. When there's a black superhero. Like, say, do you know where, you know where you're from? I think most black people don't know where the fuck they're from. You know what I mean? Like, say, they just know that, oh, somewhere in Africa.

So it's kind of like just Latin, black. Okay, whatever. Take what we can get. Yeah, I mean, I guess. I guess we have Michelle Rodriguez from fucking Avatar. So that's fun. Oh. And Mario Lopez.

Oh. You guys have, no, no, there's others. Yeah, I mean, I'm happy that Mouse Marles. There's, okay, so hold on, hold on. So there's Michelle Rodriguez from Avatar. You want to go? Are we talking about, are we talking about superheroes? Supereros, there's Latin superheroes.

There's not as many. I'll admit that. I'll very much admit that, but there's not as many. There's America, there's a Blue Beetle, America Chavez. There's fucking, what you call it? America Chavez? Yes. The fuck is this?

I'm not kidding. That's your name. Oh, oh, Benito and some. Benito Encelante. Benito Excellante from Section 8. I'll look him up. I forgot his full name. I think is Robert De Costa. There's...

Whatever, man. They are. They aren't spending superheroes. It's just not as many. You're right. Very much so. You guys have the least. Oh, not Benito.

Bueno, Excellante. Excuse me. Bueno, Exelante from Section 8. You got to fucking see this guy. You got to see this fucking piece of shit. And you're part Native American. too, so there's fucking, what you call it? There's Thunderbird and Warpath.

Warpath's a cool name. He's fucking badass. He's got knives and his skin is red. No, I'm kidding. Is it red? Yo, Derek, what the fuck is this? That's Buenos Aires from Section 8. Some DC shit.

Is that he? The video game? No, no, no. It's a comic, dude. Oh, my God. Is it about paversed people, particularly minorities? You know, listen, I can't. I can't with this.

Yo, I love the way he looks, bro. I love it. We can't talk about the way he looks because they can't see him. Well, they're going to look it up. They're going to look up Bueno Excellante. He's great. Bueno Excellante. Bueno exalante.

Anyway, and that's all he says. I'm sorry, sorry, sorry. What are some of y'all's favorite underrated movies that deserve a sequel? For example, I really love that Will Smith superhero movie Hancock. I think the story was different, and Smith playing a drunk asshole was pretty funny. Much loved you all. I hope you guys are doing well. I can't think of any movie that I thought deserved a sequel that didn't get one.

I, let me see. A movie that I loved that which had a sequel. I think the departed needed a sequel. Oh, really? No. Fucking everyone died. The movie very much so ended. It was over at the end of that movie.

He said that so seriously. It was so dead thing. I know. I was genuinely curious as though what the thought brought. process would be why? Like, what would the sequel be about? The returning. Everyone's funeral.

Everyone's funeral. The gun. The gun. The reappearing. Yeah. I don't know. I would say Donnie Darko, but Donnie Darko got a sequel and it was fucking horrible. I mean, doesn't he fucking die? Like, what are you talking about?

Yeah, but, you know, I wanted more. What do you mean you wanted more? You wanted more of a dead person? What if the situation is? Parade is fucking. A fucking dead body around, yes, because I would love that. What if the sequel was just a GoPro that had a little night vision camera in it that was like lodged into his coffin? You could watch him rot for an hour and a half.

Actually, I'm with it. I'm with it. That'd be kind of dope. Tani Tarko, too. Just fucking an hour and a half of a fucking rotting flesh. The rotting. The rotting. The rotting.

The rotting. It all falls apart. Yeah, actually, you know that I'm thinking about it. I feel like, not. that it deserved a sequel necessarily but I genuinely thought the tone of the

the Jim Carrey series of unfortunate events movie was actually pretty fucking solid they just rushed through like three books in that one movie and that made it kind of garbage but if they had treated that better I thought it could have been

I thought it could have been a pretty decent series there you go that's pretty good I forgot about it until just now I got one I don't know what I want I think I loved the kick ass movies actually

There was a sequel to it though Yeah but I think They could have kept going It just didn't have enough backing Like it wasn't like left Huh It was really cool at first I really I was

I'm a fan of that And I really actually like the comic too And I was just like so stoked on I thought they did a brilliant job Like that broad That played hit girl I thought it was like perfect I was really happy

With what they did and then it just seems like they couldn't get the backing that it deserved. I think it would have been much better as everything else, a series. And if it was on Netflix or Amazon or something, kind of like, what is that series that that they just released on Amazon? It was called The Boys. You see that? Oh, yeah.

Yeah. I haven't seen it yet, though. Yeah, if they did something like that, I think it would have been perfect. You know, it's just kind of how things are executed sometimes. It's not, you know, it just wrong place, wrong time. You know? Yeah. I don't know.

I'm trying to think of movies I think that should deserve sequels. I really can't think of one. I think that serves a sequel I didn't get one. Fucking. The happening? What happened? The going on still, I guess. That could be a sequel.

Oh, man. The going on still. Dude, seriously, everything got a sequel, and a lot of it was just bad. Like, always wanted. It got a sequel? No, no, no, no, no. talking about things in general, man. Oh, I was like, what the fuck?

Sequels, I feel like, are rarely better than the original. Like, it's, it's very like, you, you don't really have too many Shrek twos, you know? Or Empire Strikes Back, you know? That's not a real thing. True, true. Yeah, most of them are just kind of like, oh, here's Little Mermaid 2

or, like, Herculeleys 2. Yeah, a lot of them are just, like, straight to DVD garbage. And even some of the ones that come out in theaters are just like, dude, not as good. Dude, John Wick 2 was a lot better than the first one, actually. Yes, the hell it was. Yeah.

That's true, yeah. But that's, like, also, like, one of those outliers. Yeah. Where, like, that's, like, kind of the exception and not the rule. Yeah. Like, when a soldier, when a soldier was much better than fucking Captain America won. Oh, far, oh, by, like, miles, by, like, miles. Like, like, leaps and bounds.

That movie is a great movie. Yeah, but they have, like, Iron Man 2, which is, like, not nearly as good as the original. Yeah, Iron Man 2 is kind of, it was all right. I liked two a lot, but it wasn't as good. Yeah, it was like it was like too That's the thing It's like the outliers really are just like You know you have your occasional Spider-Man 2

You have your occasional Shrek 2 You have your occasional You know, John Wick 2 But like most of them are just kind of like Either they're just as good Or just sort of like Eh, that was fine Very true

Or sometimes they're just completely Fucking shoehorned Yeah Yeah Oh yeah Absolutely Yeah I think all my favorite movies I can think of like

They don't need a sequel Or they had one So it's just whatever. Yeah. Yeah, exactly. But Hancock, let me, Hunger, Derek.

Hancock was a massive disappointment with that gay-ass twist. I'm sorry. Like, if you remember. The twist? The twist was like, the chick that he was, there was like, he wasn't the only one with powers.

Oh, yeah. And then like the further they're apart, they lose their powers more and they're like Johnny. It got really gay. Where I was kind of like, I loved the premise of it at first. So like, yeah,

Will Smith is this superhero bum. bum that just doesn't really care. It just got like gay, like, like gay in a precious way, you know, or they try to make, they took this, they took this angle that I was just like, uh, yeah, I know what you mean. It was like weirdly sentimental and cutesy for like what the actual marketing and what the premise was at the beginning. Because it kind of, it kind of sold itself as like this kind of like, mean-spirited, you know, kind of like, here's a drunk asshole. who's just doing superhero stuff

and then it just became this weird story about love and friendship and it was just like, what the fuck? Yeah. It really is kind of weird. It was cute. I remember seeing that movie though and I thought the action looked pretty cool.

It wasn't bad. Yeah, the imagery of like a drunk Superman is pretty fun. Yeah, yeah. I remember enjoying like the first half of the movie for sure and then it just got weird. I remember there being like a scene where everything's in like slow motion

and it's all sad and shit because I think someone was about to die or it was something else it just became too much Do you guys remember the scene of a suicide squad at the very end? Did you see suicide squad? Yeah, I saw it together, remember?

Yeah, at the very end. You were there? Yeah, we were sitting in the very front of the fucking theater in our necks hurt afterwards. Yeah, it's fucking terrible. We were sitting in the front of the theater in the corner. What the fuck did you guys go fucking day one or whatever?

Because when we first moved to California, we didn't know how the ruling for buying tickets were. Because back home, it's not like that. You just buy tickets to sit down in a theater somewhere. Oh, yeah, you just find your seats, yeah. Yeah. I miss that, man. You got to, like, you got to select your seat and you got to make sure, you know, it's available. It's like, fuck that.

Back home, you just sat down to me. Someone's like, you want to get up. He's like either no or you get up and you move your seat for them. Yeah. No, we, yeah. See, I understand why they did it, though, because I was one of the assholes that would usually you know I would cut and then I would just people have been waiting in line like say I would never forget

the dark night right no no the dark night where people were waiting in line forever and then as they started walking in me and my friend just started walking in with them and got great seats and he saw people were all pissed and I'm like what the fuck are you gonna do what are you gonna fight me? What are you gonna fight me so I kind of

such an asshole thing to say are you going to fight me? I love the idea of somebody somebody acting like an absolute villain on their way into watching a superhero movie. That's so good. Yeah, I didn't do it often, but, because I didn't,

I usually don't go to, to the premieres. I like to go on Sunday where it's old people and nobody's clapping and shit. So that, when it's rare like that, like the Avengers or something like that,

I'll just be like, I don't care, I'm gonna get a good seat, suck my dick, but yeah, now they changed everything. Yeah, no, I hear you. Yeah.

That makes sense. Yeah. But yeah, that was a really bad. But yeah. That was a rough thing. That, fucking movie. If you guys remember the end of it where it was like slow motion, they're all like trying

to defeat Enchantress and it was like weird. It was like it was overly epic, but it just made it insanely cringy. I don't know if you guys remember like throwing, I think the gun to Harley or something. It was just all in slow motion. It was really like, who the fuck thought this looked cool? And I remember, I'm actually, I think I'm going to watch Hancock again because I'm watching fucking whenever the hell it came out. But I just remember having a moment like that and it really turned me off.

So I'm sorry, Hunger. But that shit did not need a sequel. Just, sorry. I feel like it could have, I feel like it had potential. It could have been a sequel. It could have at least been executed better initially. I mean, yeah, actually you're right, because maybe they could have, like you said, executed better.

So I take that back. Never mind. All right. What do we got? What do we got here? What do we got here, huh? Moto Zealot wrote in. He says,

What's good, thick boy and the shorties. Hey, thank you. That's pretty good. Would you rather look... Oh my God, no. Would you rather look like or talk like Jar Jar Binks forever? You cannot kill yourself. Oh, no.

I'm gonna fucking try to kill myself a lot. Then I'd probably just rather sound like him. Yeah. Oh, it's both bad, dude. Well, here's the thing. He has penis eyes pretty much, bro. You want to fucking have dick eyes with a fucking horse fish face? Well, here's the thing, though.

But you got to be like, Mesa Sweeney. Mitha, I think you have fat ass. That's kind of the thing, right? Where it's like you're not going to get laid regardless. So there's like, unless you just shut up forever and never say anything and like to trick people to thinking you're mysterious. See, I would take my chances in catfish, right? I would, I would, I would, I would, I would, I would, say sweet nothings and be like a pimp online and then when I meet up with there, I'm like, accept me, accept this. But no, but you're going to find a woman,

you're going to find a woman who's, who is insane enough to accept you. That's what I'm, which is not a great, probably not a great option if you look like fucking jar jar, Okay, so here's, here are the different things. Look. Here are the different things that you have to take into account. If you look like an alien, that kind of gives you a pretty neat opportunity as far as, like, having just a completely different life. You could be like, I don't know, you could be like a crazy bounty hunter or something. You could, like, strike fear into the hearts of all sorts of people.

Jar Jar Jar, Binks is not intimidating looking. Are you fucking joking? He looks weird. It looks like, I don't, he's intimidated because of how unique he looks, but like he's not terrifying. Bro, bro. If you woke up in the middle of the night, you were like, oh, man, my balls are full of piss. I have to relinquish all my piss out of my balls because that's where the piss goes. And then you walk out into your hallway.

It's dark. It's like 2 a.m. You're about to go to the bathroom. You turn the hallway light on. Something that jar jar binks, a photorealistic, fucking render of Jar Jar Jarns is standing in. your fucking hallway deadpan, tee posing, looking at you. That is going to be the

defining moment of your life from then on. That's very true. Chris, Chris, that statement is very true, but it also is true with several different kinds of creatures. If I see any person, period. No matter what, no matter after alien looking or not, just tee posing in the dark

where I live, I'm going to be beyond frightened, Chris. It does, it could be Jar Jar Bing's, it could be fucking Kiyu, it could be Mickey Mouse. It can be courage and a cowardly fucking dog, dude. I'm going to be scared of shit. Jar Jar's not intimidating, really. He looks weird.

Jarjar is disconcerting. He is dissettling. And that is enough. That's enough. I don't, I don't think of some sort of fucking human horse fucking hybrid that didn't get enough home for a lot. That wouldn't scare the shit.

Are you, you're off your rock. I would be a lot of. But I wouldn't be like, oh my God, I'm terrified. No, that's bullshit. What the fuck is that? I'm like, what the fuck is that? Like, I'm scared because this creature's here. Not, I'm looking at this and I'm paralyzed in fear by what I'm looking at.

Jankson, I've seen you get scared washing dishes. I've definitely been frightened by people just walking up on me. That's very true because I'm not expecting that. And I'll be the same kind of situation. And there would be the same kind of situation. I'd be like, what is that? I can't figure out what that is. Hold on.

What was, what was there? No, no, no. I'm just like, dude, if Jar Jar Jar, fuck, when you're washing dishes. and then Jar Jar taps you on the fucking shoulder. All you're saying is that you'd just be surprised and say what the fuck is that. I'd be alarmed because I'd be like, first of all, Jar Jar Binks is fake. How was he here? Second of all, how do he get behind me?

What is what's going on? What are the rules now? Are the rules different for the world? I think, I honestly think that you're too, you are too familiar with Jar Jar. You're not thinking of it, thinking of it on saying outsider's perspective. of like just this thing being real and appearing in front of you. I can't grasp it. I guess I would be fucking freaking out because I'm like, what is this?

You also need to take into account that this is somebody who looks like Jarjo. They could probably talk like fucking Liam Neeson or fucking Keith Davis. That could change the dynamic. That would calm me. Suddenly, suddenly you have a horrifying thing. I'm like, holy fuck, it's screaming at me. I can't sound like Keith David, but Tom. Tom, Tom, Sweney.

Sweeney. Tom Sweeney. It's impossible. You're here. It's me. It's me, Jarjar. I've been hired to kill you, nigga. I'm like, you can't, you can't say that, can you?

I mean, I guess he can. Isn't he like a Jamaican alien or something? What is he? Who, Arbiter? No, no. Oh, no, we're not talking about Arbiter. We're talking about Charger with fucking Arbiter's voice. I don't know what I would do, man

I don't know, I don't know Jar Jar Binks saying the N-word In Keith David's voice is probably like Has Keith David ever said it? I'm going to look it up as soon as we're done with the podcast He's had to have said it on something, bro I don't exactly know what I'm doing here I think he's too fucking clean

I think he's too clean I don't think he's like Hmm No I was thinking The Sum of the Bob Mary He was in a show called Rush, a movie called Rush or something like that About like a bunch of like racially charged things Oh then it's probably there dude

It's probably like old stuff that he's probably dropping in bombs left and right Which I would love to hear Because then it would just be like Arbiter It would be like Captain Anderson for Mass Effect It would be like just all these characters just dropping in bobs Shepard You nigger Come here nigga

Shepard I love his delivery man His delivery is so good. He's so good. Fucking amazing. So amazing. It's just his voice, too. It's not even like a put on thing.

He just sounds better than people, simply. Oh, yeah. Yeah, he sounds like such a superior person. It's insane. Like, if I were Keith David, right, I would be, I would be waking up every morning and just talking to myself. I would wake up, I would never. You already do that.

I walked over, I walked over to the bathroom. I just always. I'm heading to use the bathroom. I will get there fairly soon. And I will back. My balls are full. My balls are full. Yet again.

I don't know. We can't disrespect Keith David like this. It's all, it's nothing but love, man. I even, I even enjoyed him in a season six of community that was on Yahoo. Yeah, he was good. Yeah, he was good in that. Yeah, I was on season six. He was?

Yeah, he was in season six, a community. I'm watching that as soon as we're done. He was one of the characters that they brought it. Like, obviously, like, season six was, like, nowhere near as good as, like, you know. The first three? Yeah, the first few seasons, yeah. But, uh, Keith David was fun on that show. Yeah.

Didn't he, like, live in, like, an RV or something? He lived in, like, a van. Yeah, yeah, it is. It was, it was, I had to actually watch it again because I only saw it the one time when it was streaming on Yahoo, which I still can't believe they fucking tried to do that. Like, hey, hey, yeah. Hey, we're going to fucking be Netflix. I'm like, shut the fuck up. Can you imagine?

Can you imagine being like, oh, man. Do you see that new awesome series that everybody needs to see on Yahoo Plus? Yahoo? You mean my email? Yeah, that's all like. Fuck that. Can you imagine watching the new season of the fucking Mandalorian on Gmail? Oh, my God.

Stop, please. Somehow Google buys fucking Google buys Disney. Oh, my, Jesus Christ. Disney could probably buy Google. Yeah, I think so, actually. Probably. They're both really rich. Um, all right, what do we got?

What do we got here? Yeah, let's see. We're going through the list. Let's see what else we get. We're going through this list here. Trevor. Troy wrote in. Hey, Troy.

He said, he said, good afternoon, human living Oreo. If you was an NPC and had to choose two games that you would have, wait, if you, okay, wait a minute, what? This is a, this is a, this is a, strange question. If you was an NPC and you had to choose two games that you have to live in, would it be GTA online or crazy taxi? So those are our options. So between... Are you kidding? This is like an easy answer to me. Crazy taxi, obviously. Crazy taxi. Obviously. I wouldn't live in a million percent. Grandin photo. Granta photo's full of fucking gang violence and bullshit. I wouldn't live

in that world. Yeah, crazy taxi. All you got to do is just stand around and take taxis. That's a pretty simple life. If you're in a taxi, you're safe. Yeah. Here's the thing. Grand Theft Auto, NPCs are literally there for like the players to just exert the stress of their day on.

They're just there to torture and like maim and destroy and they die. They're there to die. But in Crazy Taxi, like you can't kill anybody. Like if a taxi like starts barreling into a crowd of people,

those crowd of people are just going to like instinctually know like there's a taxi here and then they're going to roll away. They roll out of the way. If it hits him. Even if it hits him. Even if it hits them, they'll probably be fine because the game's not designed to murder NPCs. And also, you get to take these, like, awesome, like, insane roller coaster ass taxi rides across town.

Oh, man, I got to get to a pizza hut and let me take a roller coaster all the way there. Such a... That's such a more funny... And you get to listen to the fucking, like, offspring and, like, bad religion. I was just thinking of the offspring. Yeah. It's just such a way better existence for an NPC. If I was a player character, I guess I'd rather be in Grant Deft Auto because then you're just free as hell.

but NPC wise Like no way in hell I'm choosing Grant Fethanthal online I would hate that Because that world is Only suffering

For people that aren't the main character Even the main characters Honestly Yeah honestly Yeah it's pretty easy to jump It is too easy to get killed In GTA now I remember having a good time

Doing a lot of dumbass shit In 4 And you would be all right You know You can crash out of a win Shield, you'd be all right. Oh, yeah. You fucking, dude, if you get hit by a car at like 30 miles an hour in GTA 5, you're fucking dead.

It's just all like, it's too, it's getting too realistic now. My nephew literally told me he got jumped and robbed by aliens in GTA. He literally told me that happened to him. He said, I live in the Bronx and that's never happened to me. But this is happening in Grant Defado. What is going on? What happened? Dude, there's like aliens now in GTA.

What's going on with that shit? There's just, like, costumes you can put on that are just, like, purple or red or all these, like, random costumes. And there's an alien group in the game that they just go around terrorizing other players. And it's hilarious. I heard, I heard somewhere that, like, there was, like, gang violence happening in Grand Theft. Yeah, that's it. That's the gang violence. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. I've seen alien shit recently. Yeah. It's bad, bro. They're kidnapping each other. They're fucking attacking each other. They're fucking.

fight or it's gang fights. People running on with hammers, beat aside something, and Granthamato streets. It's fucking ridiculous. Yo, Grand Theft Auto, Grand Theft Auto online got too much for me. Like, I remember, like, I tried it, and I liked the premise of it.

But then, like, I don't know if you guys remember this, but, like, I don't know if it's changed now. I'm sure it probably has, um, because the game's, like, seven years old at this point. Yeah. But, holy shit.

I remember when you first got it, like, you needed to, like, buy car insurance. and like if if you ruined another player's car like you would have to pay them in like real money and like that money was used to get weapons and you couldn't unlock like the good weapons until you like played like a certain amount of like ranked like team death match shit

or like a bunch of like weird game modes that you're not playing Grand Theft Auto for it's just so weird. Yeah I was a I remember all of that stuff I don't know if it's still doing it and I do remember being angry because I even though Grand The Vado A big staple of it was racing

And a lot of I just, I never cared about those missions And so I was pretty angry where I had to like Not only race I had to wait for other people to join It was I was like What the fuck is this? I was I just, I'm not a fan of that shit man

I'm not a fan of like Yeah It made me sad because I actually really loved Grand The Votto 4's multiplayer Because it was just you would jump into free roam And then it was just that was it Like you would just hang out in Manhattan.

With him and sandboxing. Yeah, yeah, and it was also just like, it was actually like very, very, very, like, arena-shootery in a way. Like, not necessarily, like, in what the game was or, like, how it was designed or anything. But in the sense that, like, everybody started with the same ability,

the same stats, and you would just find weapons on the map as you go, and you would find vehicles on the map as you go. And it was like, oh, this is fun. I like this. Because you didn't have to grind for the ability to use C-4. you just had to know where the C4 spawn and you had to go find it before somebody else did. And then you could just terrorize other people organically instead of having this like weird kind of system that's like kind of intended for that.

It felt a little bit more freeing because you knew that you knew that the developers were just like kind of throwing you into the sandbox and just saying like have fun instead of trying to guide you with systems and like, oh, don't ruin other players cars. Because you'll have you'll be penalized for it. And it's like, what? I want to blow up people's cars. Of course, it's Grand The Tidal 4. This is Grand The Toto Online. Are you kidding? You expect me not to steal something.

You can't steal other players' cars in Grand Theft Auto Online. Really? Yeah, because of the, like, what happens? You get booted. Something happens. I forgot what it was. But really? You can't do it.

There's a protection. It shuts down or something. The last time I played it, so like, 2013, 2014 time. But, like, back then, I tried to steal. This guy was, like, grief in me. These guys was killing me every time I spawned. So I went and I sought out his car because his car is like on the map. It's like labeled as like this player's car.

And I tried to steal it or try to blow it up. And it wouldn't let me, it wouldn't let me steal it. So I blew it up and then I got penalized for it. I got all my money taken away. And I was like, what the fuck is this? This is so stupid. That's wild. Yeah.

Why am I being punished for being punished? Yeah. Yeah, I remember something like that happening. And yeah. And this was like, say, 2017 when I was playing it. So I'm assuming. it's still the same because that wasn't that one like three years later i don't think they don't think they did anything um it's not a stretch i don't know i might hop on it again or something or

i was actually i might get it actually i'm probably gonna get it a lot of people a lot of people that i should like for a stream for the like you should probably get granted the photo and i'm like all right dude i think it's like uh well last time i checked it was it was 15 bucks on steam so yeah you that's pretty yeah you should check that out i wonder if it's still 15 bucks but because uh i like what i like doing oh it's 30 bucks now But they'll be on sale again, so you just put it in a wishless. It's on Game Pass, too, right now, I think. Oh, shit.

Well, there you go. I heard it was free somewhere. I heard it was free in some form or fashion. Yeah, it's free on Game Pass. Okay, there you go. Yeah, let's do that. My favorite things to do is just when you play those games, it's not necessarily just going online. I just like going into single player and just doing fucking hoard mode.

You know, you do it with their cops. Just killing swaths of cops, particularly ones with white skin. just fucking slurring them like killing them like fucking dogs like bringing them out to the back of the fucking house and just fucking putting shells in their fucking domes you know. Damn, dude.

All right. All right, Vox, cut the cop killing conversation out. We want this is a sponsored podcast. No, but no, just, yeah, the making bacon. That's what I'll call it. It's called making bacon. Come here, little pee. Come here, a little piggy.

Jesus Christ. Why do they call them pigs again? It's like, what was it? It was an abbreviation for something, right? I don't know. I don't know the origin of pig at all, actually. Not even slightly. That's so weird.

It's kind of come from something. Anyway, what do we got? We got this question here. Heartless Wretch wrote in. Yeah. Might be the last month I can give to the podcast for a while, and I realized that in all this time, I hadn't asked a question. So now is my only chance.

Chris, what is your favorite episode of pregame discharge? To Mr. Blackman and the Sween, what YouTube videos do you watch, if any, like TV shows, like a week-to-week thing where you tune in for? I love the podcast and hope you all stay safe, and thank you for the enjoyable content. Well, thank you for all your support. Yeah, we really appreciate you.

Yeah, thank you so much. We understand. We understand. Do what you got to do. Anyway, I don't have, every episode of pre-game discharge is my favorite episode because Lyle is a beautiful a beautiful soul. Low's just fucking hilarious.

Lyle's insane. He's so intense that all the whole time he's so fucking yoint. I'm like good. Sick. It's insane. Yeah, they're fun intros.

But as far as like YouTube channels that I watch kind of religiously, I'm sure there are some but I'll, man, I feel like I have to think. I have a few.

I have a few I watch every time. But what about you? What do you, Derek? What do you got? I don't know, like, like, watching something like it's television on YouTube that regularly. It's, it is, there's, I would say the only thing is it would be, I would say it's weird because a lot of it's kind of slowed down because a lot of it was sports oriented. Like watching things like first take or whatever and just hearing fucking Max Kellerman and fucking Stephen A just bitch at each other. That's always fun.

I fucking love Stephen A. Smith. And Shannon too. I love fucking hearing Shannon Sharp with Skitt Bailey's. Let me take you. Yep. Let me tell you, Skip, you fucking punk-ass little bitch. Dude, I did not know he was in the shape he was in, bro. Oh, dude, he never, he never stopped. He never stopped.

Like, everybody else gets that, you know, the retired athletes' body where they just kind of stop because, like, why keep working out at that top level? But I don't know. For some reason, he's like, I'm going to stay as ridiculously swole as humanly possible just for talking. He's insane. He's like, he looks, he's in peak physical shape right now. Like, physically. He just looks like he's in perfect form. Yeah, so it's pretty crazy.

But I would watch stuff like that. And then there's a show I watch called Morning Combat, which is not fucking, it's not Internet Bloodsports. You're sure? It's people talking about just combat in general, usually MMA and then boxing, whatever's going on. But it's kind of ramping back up because the UFC has had three events in the past week, which is pretty insane.

It's wild. That's risky. Yeah. But they test everybody, and they barely have anything. So there's no audience or anything. But my whole thing is that's probably the only thing that I watch, like, say, I like to keep up with that stuff as if, like, it always keeps me kind of holding on to where I'm like, man, I really need to go train. I need to join that fucking mixed martial arts gym and actually start training. Not to compete, but just to do it.

And so it always just kind of keeps me holding on, but I haven't done it yet. Because I'm fucking, I'm just a gamer. I don't know. Like, I feel like there aren't that many. I don't know if I watch that many people who upload that. consistently, but I I have a channel that I always a channel that I always check to

like make sure, oh, Buff Correll is somebody. Buff Correll, absolutely. I fell off like fucking a few years ago. No, do we watch it every week? He's still at it and there's always just he's covered, I think, for those of you who don't know, we're jumping the gun a little bit. For those of you who don't know who Buff Corell is,

he's just this dude who does these like horrible covers of every every single song that you could possibly imagine. There's like anime openings. There's like Nickelodeon team drama theme songs. Disturbed Alicia Keys. Just an absurd number of artists. And he covers them horribly while dancing in this,

in the same room without a shirt and doing all these like obsessive, like absurd dance moves. Don't forget about the most important thing. His, the stuff that he puts grease like, Vaseline in his hair. And then he has... He's just lathered in Vaseline.

He's got giant eyebrows. He's got a big poster of himself in his room that he always stares at. His videos are all... He's always wearing basically the same pants. He's... The camera is always in the same direction. The room never changes. It's insane.

It's the most fascinating thing. And I hope to God, the next time that I see a Buff Correll video, I want to see in the comments... People reference this podcast. I want people there. I want people there. I want people showing Buff Corel some support because he's insane. Dude, we should have, dude, our first guest should be Buff Correll, man. He's fucking amazing.

Can you imagine we can get him as a guest on the podcast? Dude, I did a deep dive on him, man, because I was actually, I was going to do a video about him on my second channel. And he, like, I saw his, I found his older channel where he was sane still. And, like, he was talking in complete sentences and he was still in front of the camera. But then he slowly started to start dancing. And then he started putting on the weird stuff and the Hitler stash. And then it just evolved into what you see now. Wait, he was a normal person once?

Yes. He was in the Army, too. He was, yeah, he was a normal person at some point. And then something happened. And now he's- That explains why he's unnecessarily jacked. Yeah. Ready, say, go.

Like, I'm like, Hey, man, you buck around. Come on. It's your boy, buckeerel. For me, I think the people I watch, I watch, I watch comics explained roughly every day. Every day I watch comics explained. Is that from Comic Story?

Twice a week. Is that the channel Comic Historian or is that something different? No, no. It's one of his homies. It's comics explained. It's another big comic channel. Oh, that's actually the channel. Okay.

Then I also keep up with, I guess, critical role, but they've been gone for a little while. But I keep a critical role. And then the last thing I say I watch every day. at least regularly is um I really got into um fucking a lick on moist critical as a very recently I got into critical

and I've been like watching him religiously because his voice is just so confusing to me he sounds like he can't get excited anymore it's fucking hilarious yeah I've known about critical for a really long time yeah and I really recently I found about critical because of the smash community yeah I remember him from the quop video

that was like the big one that was a long time ago dude yeah that was like 2007 or something 2009 it's wild oh wow but uh yeah i don't know aside from that like i i feel like i just watch i feel like i watch a lot of the same videos over and over again just because it's almost like oh and as tech i'm gaming

oh that guy yeah as tech cross so he does he does destiny videos and we play destiny a lot in this house and uh just our roommates are really into it so he does a lot of like uh just basically like oh here's what the meta is and here's what the what the, you know, what's happening with this gun. Here's an update and what this means. And he's, like, really good at explaining stuff. But he's got, like, the strangest voice I've ever heard because it's like southern, like, it's like redneck, but it's, but it's not.

He sounds like, uh, how would you describe it? He sounds like a very aware and respectful redneck. Or like a southern. He sounds like a very politically versed southerner. It's really strange. He has a fantastic voice, though. it's a good voice. Like, it's not a voice that I normally would be able to, like,

if someone were to mimic that voice to me, I would be like, that sounds like a terrible voice. But for some reason, it really works well with the way that he speaks. I don't know if I could really ever pinpoint that accent, because it's just so strange. What's his channel's name again?

Aztec gaming. Aztec cross-gaming, I think, actually. Yeah, it's something like that. He does Destiny videos. If you find that combination of titles and vaguely similar-sounding names, it's probably the right person. But I don't know how to describe that accent

at all. I have no idea you guys talking about. Yeah. It's very niche, but his voice is like really strangely satisfying. Um, what do we got here? Let me say,

oh, fuck. The site just fucking crashed. Ooh. Classic Patreon. Patreon. Patreon is so, Patreon is so well optimized.

Yeah, they, they they they they're just collecting checks they're not like yeah they're not doing i don't think they've had a single update to this site in like the longest time it's been i spent a couple years i think like they just don't care bro like you're gonna use us so shut up and get over it yeah what a fucking great position to be in like creating a site where you just all right everybody this is where you make money and just give us a cut of it And then you do nothing.

It's pretty amazing. Yeah, it's pretty smart. It's like Steam. Yeah. It's like Valve when they made Steam. It's just like, hey, we'll just make a lot of money from people, from other people selling their games on our platform. Yeah.

Honestly. We win. Yeah. They're pretty much uncontested, even with, like, the Epic Game Store existing. Yeah, epic. They still make, like, a stupid amount of money. Right. Yeah, they have a lot of my fucking money.

That's for sure. Yeah, for sure. They have a bunch of my money. I don't even have a fucking Steam. I don't have like a fucking PC that can play video games. I have a bunch of games on Steam already. Just waiting. He's waiting to use them.

They fucking got you, man. Already. God damn Gaben, dude. Fucking slap them if I ever see him. Slap in his fucking mouth. Mitchell Blackwood wrote in. He said, good day, fellas. It's very Australian.

Good I. Good day. Would I? If you could make. a gameplay mechanic change and a storyline change in any game of a series, what changes would you make? Chris for Halo, Derek for Mass Effect, Sweeney for Zelda. Keep up the great work you guys rock.

Stay safe. You guys can go first because I don't know. Wait, like a gameplay thing for like Zelda, I would change? Anything that you would change about these, let's simplify it a little bit, anything that you would change about these serieses, these franchises, on a gameplay level. Okay, I would I would change the

I would give their ability to be able to Focus on like you know you lock on targets and breath of the wild Yeah, I would make it so you could sort of do it more passively Then like only facing them directly and kind of a camera only focusing on that one person I wish you could do it in more of a god of war manner where like one person would be sort of highlighted in a little bit more manner than everybody else So I can still get a good view of everyone else around me I would change that and in story story wise, I would have Zelda. Nobody's asking, nobody's asking

about story. Nobody's asking that. Okay. I don't care about that. I don't care about what your answer is for that. Fuck you. I don't care about you, bitch. I'll fight you. I'll fight you back. Here we go. I want that death match. I'll fight you back. Can you imagine you somebody saying somebody says to you, I'll fight you and you say

I won't. I won't. I'll kill you. That's a great response, actually. That's actually, yeah. That's definitely going to have someone leave you alone. Anything that you would change about your beloved Mass Effect? Mass. Correct. Mass. That's what I'm talking about, baby.

No, the only thing that I missed the sliding mechanic when you would slide in a cover from M.E2 and they took it out of Mass Effect 3. Did they really? Yeah. So now you just, you don't slide in the cover anymore. You just, you pretty much just duck down once you're like at there. So in which sliding into cover would actually you would evade some shots that way.

It was an actually, it was a, it wasn't, it didn't just look cool. It actually helped keep your shield intact. So it was something that I'm like, oh, that's dumb. I don't know why they took that off. I think the only reason they did that maybe is because sometimes when you're running towards like something, you can slide over it and then it maybe would be an issue. But I usually never use that mechanic. It didn't fucking, like, I never needed to slide over something, like genuinely needed to do it.

It just kind of looked cool. And then I think everybody would be, would agree with the ending of Mass Effect 3, the catalyst, that stupid little kid. I think that's like the only thing that Universal Airloans, like, what is this shit? What is this stupid little kid? And like, I hate that he's talking to me. And I would just, just completely get rid of him. and I didn't even care about the different choices which, you know, because if there was only one way,

I think people would have bitched about that too. We're like, oh man, we've had so many choices and so many different variables we can do and now there's only one canon thing. People would have bitched. But I really just think that stupid kid at the very end that was the part of the catalyst, that kid that died at the beginning of the game.

And then all of a sudden now it almost turned into some contact shit where it's like, I'm projecting your stupid image. of the blah blah you know it was just like what the fuck is this this is stupid but um I did hear it was a rumor I might have talked about this before that they had different plans because they talked about dark matter

in the second game and they thinking that the reapers were going to be tied to that and then there was a leak on Reddit because of course there was and then because of that I think it's just a rumor that the devs were like well fuck you then we're going to switch it up and then

that's where that kid got inserted I'm like, that was the worst decision you could have ever made, ever. That was a worst thing kids, man. There was nothing fucking worse than kids, bro. Nothing worse. Couldn't agree more. Yeah, you know, I'll sign that.

They're just small people with fucking less evolved brains. Idiots. Yeah, I don't need them in video games. Like, I really don't. Like, they're just, they're nuisance, especially, like, why would you do that? What reason? Why would anybody think that's a good idea?

That's the weird thing. That's the weird. Yeah. It was weird. The thing that I hated, the thing that I hated most about the last of us was that I couldn't kill that kid. I really wish I could have killed kids in Skyrim, honestly.

Oh, yeah. There's a mod for that. Oh, yeah. I have fucking... annoying and disrespectful to me. And I was like, yo, I'm the Dragonborn. I'll shout you into a house

and turn you into fucking paste, you little idiot. I, um... I don't know if I'm remembering this right. My memory's a little bit hazy because this is like, 2011, 2012. But I remember I modded that ability into the game. And do you remember the fucking, what's that stick that would like change things?

The Wabba Jack? The Wabba Jack. I Wabajacked this kid who was like, who was like talking shit to me. He was like, uh, my daddy could beat you up. And like I turned him into like a pile of mice and just killed all the mice. Yes. I don't know if it was mice specifically or like whatever the fuck. But like I turned him into something and killed whatever it turned into.

And it was like just such a freeing moment. moment when I was just like, oh, you can finally shut these stupid little idiots up. And you see the way you savor the kill is don't, don't fucking use, don't use weapons. Use gauntlets, man. Because you fucking suplex them, like a German suplex. Like, just imagine that suplex. I would have so much fun putting them on your back and then slamming them. It was just so satisfying.

Liberating. I have a lot of, and as a matter of fact, I need. to the last time I played Skyrim, I was streaming it. I guess I took that, I took that one off, that mod off, which I was kind of pissed off. And then there was like some mods like where my wife and some other chick were all naked. And I was like, fuck. So I kind of like switch. But I just try to avoid them, you know, but I definitely, I wanted to show everybody,

fuck them kids, man. They need to be dealt with at all cost. They're the worst people in that game because they're just in. vulnerable without the mod. They're just like, so they stick out especially. So like, yeah,

that's just such a free. It's making, this is making me want to play Skyrim again. Yeah, me too. It's liberating. I want to play it again, but I just don't,

I don't want to put that much time into a game again. You just mod it. You can just do like a stupid modded version where you can just jump in and just sort of fuck around. Yeah, have everything fucking.

That's what I, I think the last time I played that's exactly what I did. I just, I had a cheat chest where it had like every resource I needed in it. Right by the right run

You know the first Fucking The first smithing thing There was a chest right there And had every single thing That I ever need in the game It was great That's what I love

Mods for that very reason Especially after you've beaten something And maybe you're just gonna put it down But it's like now I have a A whole other fucking world to explore Yeah Yeah It's getting everybody naked

It's a fun game It's It's More games should let you just Dismantle kids I could have sad that we can't Yeah But yeah I don't know

I think I think for me I feel like I talk about this every stream At this point But If I would change anything I would probably change nearly everything About the Halo 5

Everything about it Because the original trilogy I wouldn't touch I wouldn't hold a candle to it I wouldn't do anything I wouldn't breathe on it I wouldn't blow on I wouldn't wink at it It's perfect.

It's fine. Exactly the way it is. I think I wouldn't have sprinting in it. I think sprinting just inherently kind of fucks map design in those kinds of games. The story is just a whole other workaround. But I think that's really the main thing. Like the main mechanics, like no sprinting. Your weapon should always be up and ready to fire at every single, at every given moment in that game.

Anything else just slows it down. Even if it feels like you're moving faster, you're just not. Like, you're straight up not. It's accelerating your base movement speed to a higher speed, but that higher speed was your base movement speed in the previous games. It's the illusion of speed, and it sucks. And that's pretty much the only thing I would change. That's fair.

That's fair. Who's the next? We got one more here from... What is this? Geez, okay. I'm retarded. Oh, road in. Perfect.

Okay. He says, Felicitations, CEO of Epic Games, Unremarkable, dark pigmented, Descendant of Africa and Lanky Millhouse.

These is all, fuck. Fuck. He scorched you to. Shit. Lanky Milhouse. Fuck. Lanky?

Fuck, bro. What? He said unremarkable descent. Unremarkable. He called you the CEO of Epic Games. I mean, that sucks, but like,

man. Because his name is Tim Sweeney. Did you know that? I know that. I found his name was Tim. Interesting. Anyway, Jesus Christ. You know what?

Fuck you. Fuck you. I'm retired. I'm not going to... Yeah, he's going to catch some hands. That's for sure. Yeah, he's trying to get beat up. Anyway, he says, as a child,

what is the most shameful thing you've ever done to one of your friends? For me, it would be when I excommunicated one of my best friends because he stopped caring about Halo and began to play con instead. That's insane, dude. You got to calm down. He deserves it, but that's about. I love Halo

But like yo Some fucking hardcore nerds shit Let's all take a breather a little bit I don't know I don't I really I was like a good friend And I never really did any fucked up things to my friends I was never that kind of kid

If you were my friend I was always nice to you I was playing Mario Party with a friend of mine Like when I was like When I This was like maybe like 2002 or 2003 Something like that And he was just He got so lucky in that one game of Mario Party

That I refused to talk to him ever again And I I held to that promise I have not talked to him since. You know, it's hilarious. Same thing happened to me, actually. Are you serious? Like, the same exact fucking thing?

I'm not kidding. I swear to God. That's, like, one of the stories about my friends. Like, one of my friends, he beat me so bad that I got up, I cursed at him, and I walked at his house. And I spoke to him the next time a month before I moved from fucking upstate New York. So that was maybe, like, six years I didn't speak to him at all. Mario Party is a fucked game.

Like, it just infuriates you. It's just not fun. It's just, like, really, really the most fuck. Because we would just play one-on-ones against each other. It'd be me and him and, like, the two CPUs. We would just be fucking so angry at one another the whole time. And I was just like, I hate you, your fucking stupid, you're a bitch, and I got up and I left.

And I didn't speak to him for years. There is one time, too, where a cousin of mine had this, I hope he's not listening to this. A cousin of mine had this really amazing, like, posable, like, limited edition statue of Jack Skellington that I fucking adored. It was just like, it looked like something that, like, they used to film the movie with.

It looked like a genuine prop. I doubt it was, obviously, but it was, like, just really well made. I was like, this is fucking amazing. And just straight up, I, just straight up stole it. Like, I just put it in my jacket and left. God, you're an asshole. I don't think he ever really asked me about it. He was probably fucking crying about it to this day, man.

He's probably, like, what are he's like, and then to make it worse, just lost it immediately. Like I lost this like really high quality, this high quality fucking thing. That's a, yeah, that's pretty fucked up. You're a piece of shit for that. What?

What do you mean? What? I just stole this thing. My cousin probably really adored. What? Then I lost it. If he adored it, he would have noticed that it was missing and he would have asked me about it.

Because that was the only person who could have possibly taken it. But you know how people usually like, I'm not going to ask my cousin about this because like, I don't think he would do that to me. Why would he betray me? that and just take my shit, you know? He was a good cousin, too. He showed me Middle Garcala, too.

He was great. I don't know why I did that to him. Yeah, that's how you chose to treat him. You're a bad person. You're a piece of shit. That's what I saw something I wanted and I decided to take it. There's nothing wrong with that. You sound, you sound like a kidnapper.

Like someone needs to calm down. You sound like someone kidnaps fucking children. I saw something I wanted and I took it. It's a great fucking defense. Or takes things from people. I don't want them to take things. Listen, you need to pace yourself.

You need to pace yourself, Christopher. Christoph, Chrisolp, calm down. Sometimes to prove that you truly want something, you have to make it clear to other people that you are interested in keeping it. Otherwise,

some kid like me, 11, 10, maybe fucking 8, 8, 9 years old, is going to waltz up to your prize statue and steal it because you didn't show it enough love. You had scratches all over it. You didn't love that fucking thing.

It was dusty. Nah, dude, I think you're just trying to validate you being a piece of shit by him not caring. Of course I am. You're a bad person for that. Of course I am. What do you think this is? I'm a bad person for that. I hope a deer stampede your body while you're sleeping.

I hope you wake up to fucking a bunch of... Yeah, I hope that Twitch fucking counsel person just stomps your face to death. I hope she comes to here. She puts hooves on her fucking feet and hands and starts just like... Romp a stomping you, though. Starts prancing on you or whatever, whatever deer do? Do you imagine being waffling? stomped by some lady pretending to be a deer

like down a drain, just fucking stomped until you're pasted. Until you're fucking, until you're more juiced and solid, bro. Fuck. She does that stupid deer noise that just sounds like a fucking duck being strewn about a fucking

being put under like one of those one of those like things that are they used to like flatten things. Hydraulic press? No, no, no. It's like the steamroller. Oh. Oh my God. What is it deer? I don't even know what a deer sounds like.

Yeah. I don't think I've ever heard a deer, actually, since there isn't very many of here. They're gross, man. They're fucking garbage, man. Have you ever seen E.T? You say that deer's sounding E.T. They sound honestly, like, genuinely.

I'm not, like, exaggerating or trying to be funny. They genuinely sound like, like, when E.T gets the light, like, shined on him from Elliot for the first time, And then he's like, he does that weird like, yeah, they sound exactly like that. They're so, they're such uncomfortable beings. What if, uh, I hate him. What a, what a deer.

Every deer simultaneously falls asleep while they're in the middle of the street. That's a lot of dead people also. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, that's a lot of dead people. But, you know, sacrifice must be made. What if deer sounded like, uh, uh, Joe Swanson? What if deer sounded like delicious pussy? Hmm.

I don't know about that one because then Would you be tempted to I would not fuck a dear It sound like pussy Derek You better not say that You'd better not fucking say that shit I don't know man Derek don't say that

I don't man Okay thank you guys for tuning into this week Snark Sank podcast It's been fantastic having you guys We've been doing this for a little while And we really appreciate all the love and support We've been giving for people I'm a deer

I don't want to hear Derek say he Think about fucking a deer if it sounds like pussy So I'm just gonna give this off to Chris So he can get ready to read things Yeah we're gonna I'm a pussy I'm a pussy Peter What is this show?

All right we're gonna we're gonna go ahead And we're gonna we're gonna segue out of this Little boy We're gonna head on out of here Thanks to everybody who watches Or I guess listens technically You can watch this Although I don't know why you would

It's just, it's literally just a thumbnail. Yeah. You must be a genuine psychopath to stare blankly at a screen. I mean, I've seen you do that before, but okay. I've never done that. Oh, okay, sure. He's lying. What?

He's done it. He's done it. In what context? I wanted to room one time. It was dark. You were standing at a screen in a dark. And I was like, you all right? And you were like, oh, hey, dude, it's going on.

You turn the TV on real quick. Like, you weren't doing anything wrong. Don't play me. Complete abject darkness. Oh, okay. Cool. That was just me lost in thought. Don't try to equate these things.

Okay. Cool. You know, it's lost in thought often? Hitler. So I wrote that whole fucking book. That's true. Yeah. I don't know if that really...

I don't know if that really connects. Fun time with Hitler. Thanks for supporting this show. If you like what you heard today somehow, by some miracle, please consider supporting us on Patreon.com slash the snark tank. $1 month.

It gets you early access. $5 a month. Gets you a question to read on the show. $10. Gets you an invite to our Discord. And... By the way,

there will be automatic. The way I've been doing it is I've been like waiting for people to come in and then I've just been making a post on Patreon to just that only those people can see as an invite to the Discord. That way it's just kind of like everybody new gets an invite. But I think there's a way to set it up so

the second you sign up for that tier, you're automatically invited so I'm setting that up pretty soon. By the time this is live, that'll already be enacted. I know a lot of people don't ask him for that. But yeah, so and the $15 reward tier gets you a producer credit and you're name dyslexically read at the end of the show, which we are now currently at.

Let's begin. So here we go. I heard something. Okay, no, there's just somebody screaming outside my window. All right. Double O Dolphin, a level one cleric. Aaron Inoscope JFK Kalupa, Aaron Alvarez, Ethereum, Alex Morrison, all hands on dick. Ah,outs King, Beels above the Gimp, Ben Douglas, Big Dude 0444, Black Nipple Gang, Cakes and FoxyPH, cataclysmic-Cunt, Cold Verb, Curtis Smith, Dankhouse, David Connolly, David Delaney, Decato, Daceto. Densest, Densest dipshit in downtown Detroit.

Nice. Nice. Doda, dova-cunt, dragaz-oh-my-god, dragazoreth, otherwise known as cunt. Nice. Dunderhead. I'm retard. Emperor Palpatine. Nice.

Seen's favorite. Oh, no. That's so fucking grim. That is grim adventures of Billy and Mandy, dude. Grisly. Fat Houdini, female Sonic admire, fetus fluid fallatio, Fialar Tandri Gutormson. I always fucked that up.

God damn. I'm getting better. It's only been, what, 15 weeks? I'm getting better at it. Fuhay, great, what is this, what is this, Gavatar, this last straight bender. Oh my God. Oh my God, that's the best name. That's the best name.

That's the best name. I think so, right? It converts people, it's pretty good. Girtworm Jim. Grandmaster Zatch. Gucci gang, my Gucci's gangrenegrine, Haco, Heartless Wretch, Harvey Lee Boswald, which I still have a soft spot for. hugger Derek I have Dane Bramage

Dane Bramage If Smoff was black He'd be Tom Sweeney Jabobo Jacob Arnston Jason Tenticles Jeremiah D. McRoberts Jose

Kajahuah Fuck me Oh damn he's $150 a month Holy shit, thank you Fucking thanks a lot Jose Calahuahua Thank you Jose

Much thanks man I know he was uh yeah I guess it just takes time because he was saying that his name wasn't read at the end of the show last time but I guess it just takes time to process uh thank you so much by this that's fucking insane well no julius caesar has jungle fever a catovox uh Kevin Andrew Ennis

King of haphazard limpisket thinks they're black but they're just gay Melfis 1 Shiv Lobotomist Mitchell Blackwood Moto Zealot Mr. Ninja Fox 117 murder ascended My sister gave me herpes Okay, that was gross Nerd, yeah, it's pretty bad Nerdmaster, Paul The Nige hunting

Lama Prince. Nice. All right. Good job, Paul. Nigey. Victor 86, Rumpel Forskin Sand deep, What the fuck? Sand deep Galarhorn Flucked What am I reading? You people

need to seek counselors in some way. Fast. Sand deep Yallerhorn Fluckter person Well, I know Sandeep Is an Indian name So thanks

Indian guy Oh wait Sand deep is actually I think it's a woman's name though Don't don't Is it Indian or is a Native American No like India Indian I knew a girl named

Sand deep when I was young That's the only reason I know Well I doubt her middle names Fucking Yallerhorn You don't know that Sergeant Sweaty Sack Side Show Bob's 15 dollar prison wallet.

Oh my god. Holy shit. $15. Damn. Prison wallet? Yeah. $50. How do you get that all in there?

There's nobody who find, there's nobody besides us who find that funny, the fucking solid snake imitation where he's just asking every question. Slav Squader, the globe trotter who, who dicted your mother's daughter. Oh my. Sunny Chance, Supersonic Sween, Sween, Pene, what, Machine Requiem? Requeam? God help you all. God help you.

Sweenie, Sweeney, you gave my piqu-oh. Oh, God. This is fucking me up. Sweeney, Sweeney, Sweeney, you give my tinkles in my peony. Oh my God. Thank you. Sweeney, the Kauai Wifu. Stitch Ripkema, which I still can't pronounce.

I'm so sorry. That Nick Walker, the Perjurian hunter, the Specter. angel, tickle my ass hairs. Toby Schumann, Tom. Tom Sweeney, the cum-guzzling champion of New York. Tutsi, urethra Franklin, which is such a great. That's a really good one. That's really good one.

Eretha Franklin, it's great. Erethra, frankly. I used to make that joke when I was a kid, but it's still, it's still funny. That's such an evergreen joke because it's so insane. Winthropy, the man denied Axis. to education due to gargantuan thighs. Oh my god. Yummy, yummy, yummy, yummy come inside my tummy and we have someone

below him. Oh, wow. Actually. Here we go. For once. Ziga, the Zee is really a sideways end. Nice. Oh my God. Thank you guys. I fucking, you guys, I hate you all and appreciate your support. My Ziga.

It all matter so much to us. Thank you. We appreciate it. Thank you. Thank you. All you Ziggas out there. Yeah, thanks so much. And also, keep in mind, again, in case you forgot, we do have merch available. There should be a link in the description of this episode, regardless of what platform you're listening to it on, whether it's iTunes, Spotify, or YouTube. By the way, we didn't talk about this.

Sorry for the fact that the last episode that went live on YouTube was 12 hours of silence for no good reason. I swear to God, that was not me. I wouldn't make a mistake like that. That's insane. That's right. I uploaded the video that YouTube the second it went live decided to just fuck the file. So apologies for last episode being late for patrons and for free feeds because of that stupid glitch.

Shouldn't happen again, but honestly, that's up to YouTube to not fuck me over again. So we'll see. We hope not. We hope not. But it ended up in some fascinating comments. So thanks for that. Anyway, we're going to head off now. We'll see you guys next week.

Thank you guys. Stay safe. And goodbye. Click and collect. Order confirmed. Dad, tomorrow can we start a band? Can we become robots? Affirmative. Can we go crab battling? That isn't a thing.

How about swimming? Dad, can we take a nap? You not off and I'll pick up the shop and deal. Deal. While you do the important things, we'll do the essentials. click and collect slot at tesco.e or in app. Tesco, every little helps. Terms and conditions apply.