The Snark Tank - #239: Dr. Fauci EATS DOGS WHOLE

Episode Date: June 20, 2024

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Restrictions apply. See website for full terms and conditions. Hey, look, he's a little dead. So when's the last time you've stolen, Kingston? Like in general? Yeah. Like physical or like in general? Like physical?

Like I've stolen something. That's the question of thief asks. Yeah, yeah, yeah, right? What type of stealing? What do you mean exactly? What do you mean by that? Like slang or like actually take things that aren't running? OPP, man.

Other people's property. Oh, God, a long time ago. Because when I was little I had sticky fingers Like when I was younger like into like maybe like 11 You don't think that's like I stopped because I was like that's not right Sticky fingers is such an infantile way to describe I'm a thief

I like it Well no because yeah It's supposed to make it sound cool It's like it's like it's not cool It's like there was rap like it was like a rap term at first Sticky fingers Not at first probably like an old Old fucking American term where it was like

Ah that's my sticky fingers Everything he touched Billy has sticky fingers. Yeah, the Uigh got sticky fingers. Yeah, the U.S.S. Ticket fingers. Hanging from a treat if he sticks to that. He stole my fucking lead paint.

He stole my lead paint and now we're all dead. He stuck to my wife and now my wife has four half black children, you know, so like that. Right. Yeah. Like, yeah. Just like that. They really painted everything with lead. Yeah.

They did. Like for a long time. I actually signed up until like the 50s. My new apartment, my, my, my apartment was built in a. 60s and there is a disclaimer that I sign that they're like, as far as we know, there is no lead pain in these walls and I'm like

I don't feel good about that at all. Yeah, as far as we know. Ambestos and the fucking kept you warm? That was your fucking what you called it before. That was insulation before. Yeah, that show was good. If you went up there, that's, dude, if you went up there to change anything, that's it, you took one.

Wasn't that like, didn't they put that in like, firemen's uniforms and stuff? Maybe. They probably put it everywhere. I'm pretty sure that you, because I think it's like, technically flame retardant or something? I don't know what the hell it was. It's flame retardant, but it's life accelerant.

Hey, watch your language. Life accelerant. Yeah. Yeah. Die faster. You live more quicker. Oh, I get, yeah, okay. Your life is gone more quicker.

Your life has gone more quicker. Welcome to the Star Tank podcast. Thank you guys for watching. Thanks for coming in. Remember, go over to patreon.com slash a snark tank. You get these early. You get these early and ad free. And the video, too.

We got extra ammo over there. That clip that we posted. What do you sound like that tanks and train guy or whatever? It's lots and lots and... What is it? Wait, what is it? I don't know. Wait, I forgot.

I said tanks and trains, but I know it's not right. It's lots and lots of jets and planes. There it is. Jets and planes. Tanks and planes. You're Palestinian, clearly. Did you see, by the way, that they were like, they finally... They finally stopped?

No, I saw something that was like... What? Like, an official recognition from the government. It's like, hey, this isn't a extermination of people. finally like or something like that there was like some like high some important person was like hey this is probably a bad they've been doing that for some of the people in the EU like yeah yeah for a minute they're like hey this is uh and then they did that court uh and i think it was south africa like that they're like oh oh oh yeah it was like look we've been there

done this all right and then like it doesn't end well let's get a little weird they're like when south africa is looking at you like hey but i know we fucked up but that place will forever be socially and racially fucked. They can never fix up Africa. It's just weird that like it was so infamous that when when something like that happens, they adopted that Afrikaans apartheid. You know what I mean? It is now it is officially called apartheid when something when people are like,

there's an apartheid happening. And I'm like, wow, it has been turned into a thing. That's how much of an event it was. It's not a very catchy name I got to say. It sounds. Well, Afrikaans is fucking. It's an upsetting language. I'll just say, I'll tell you that.

It's upsetting. Really? Yeah, because you have these Dutch people come over and then just made their own language and then called it Afrikaans. Like, that's fucking, that is really fucking upsetting. I think it's so disrespectful when there's a fucking South African fucking Miss America. She's a white. I think that's so, I think that is so wildly disrespectful. I understand there's still from, I don't understand there's still from there.

Obviously, that's the country there from. Got to embrace it. No. But that's not. That's not for anyone, though. You know what I mean? Well, they represent. They're representing a whole country.

To who? What are you talking about? Miss America? To Miss. World is like that? They represent the whole country. These are not important at all. Right.

Well, okay. Not, not. Not probably, definitely not so anymore. 100, 100%, 100%. I don't believe it ever used to be. Never in our lifetime. 100%. It was like way past killed.

Yeah, they're still doing shit. But like back when our families, something like that, like when our parents are growing up, there was like a Miss Puerto Rico My grandmother talked about And everybody was fucking cheered Like literally Puerto Ricans are going crazy

Because they didn't have it for a very long time Yeah, that's weird Not for us though Like as long as we've been alive They're still beautiful I've watched because on TikTok Obviously you fucking get trapped And you watch beauty pageants

No I watch adult women beauty patches I don't watch child ones I mean quite frankly It's both kind of They got rid of them right It's still super objectification Right I've definitely watched it Because I have sisters

Oh I don't have a problem With objectification I just because it's fucking lame I have sisters So in four, I was, when she was on her, like, when she was on her, like, I want to be very pretty shit. I'd have to watch with her. I had no control on my TV. I just think that you just do something more interesting.

Like, 100%. Maybe like fucking, you know, swords and shields. They should peel. Imagine. Swords and people fighting. Jacksonville with katanas. That'd be amazing. Ready to fight.

Like, every culture gets their weapon. That'd be fucking amazing. And they go into each other. Swords and shields. They should get into like a, like a, like an animal skinning contest on stage. Who can skin the beast of this? Yeah. Who can strip this deer.

deer into beans, into meat and bones. Yeah. Into beans. Who can turn his deer into beans first? And he started using magic and they're transmuting it. I wonder. See that I'm, I'm in Red Dead 2 mode. And like, I'm a skinned a bear.

And then I have animal fat. And now I can make explosive rounds. I love how, I love how that translates. Like, you just need like, it's, yeah. So you just need. You didn't do the whole, you didn't do all the, or the, what's it called? When you, when you, when you, when you bring them to the, um, the, the, Fletcher, Fletch.

You go to the, um, no, you, you, you threw the, you threw the, the name out of my head by doing that. I was so wrong. Oh my God. You go to that thing. That guy has all that illegal shit kind of. He has all that, and you can get the schematics from him. The, I can't believe, I, it's, it's going to come back to me later, but anyway.

I was so wrong. I made him forget. Because like, I was like, oh, you go to the, and then now I'm, I, it doesn't matter. The buffalo head, had, um, I had all the, uh, the different things. Yeah, but it just, get those. I didn't, I didn't. It's just the requirements. Well, I just specifically, I wanted all the explosive rounds.

That was, like, my biggest thing. Like, there's nothing more satisfying than exploding people in that game. Oh, the horses. Sorry, horse. I try my best, not they have the horses, but sometimes they're acting a fool. It's usually the ones the cops are on because the ones with the cops that come in rushing in. Like, they're all fucking hot shit. And then, like, you're trying to aim.

I'm trying to headshot, right? But the, and then the horse kind of gets in the way and it gets its head blown. I don't get it, man. You shoot the horse the cop false. Of course I'm shooting the horse. I mean, it's just, you don't want to do that. Those are not real horses. It's also it fucks your honor.

And I'm trying to be, I'm trying to be as evil. If it's your honor if you kill horses? Yeah. Yeah. Like even if they're enemy horses? Yeah. Oh, fuck. Yeah.

Yeah. Did you end of Mac. I had Max honor, but I had Max honor. I got the good end. I don't know how you do that. I was supposed to be in a dickhead. It's too, it's too, to me it's too hard because sometimes I even,

I feel like it might be bugs or something where somebody is like, they need help and I'm on my horse. took too long to get off and then they just immediately get antagonistic. I didn't even say anything to them yet. You've altered the shit out of your game though. Your FPCs are probably looking at you and they probably see like the various skins that you have in the background like but like through their vision. You're like that's an alligator and a dolphin and a fat man at the same time.

That scary get away from me. This shit is crazy because you can like the trainer that I put on, you can pretty much be anyone in the game and some of the things are game breaking. like I was trying to see, oh, how would it be if I was a salmon? Like if I was just a salmon on land and then it just crashed. It just crashed immediately. The game can't handle it. Salmon on land is impossible.

But like everything else, the gator, the eagle was cool. But like that fat dude, the farmer that like chases you if he kill his sister or whatever, I was him for a minute. I blew his fucking head off, bro. Of course he blew his head off. Dude, speaking of Red Dead and Rockstar in general, man, like 2025 is going to. Hello, hello. I'm Malcolm Gladwell, host of Smart Talks.

with IBM. I recently spoke with IBM's new director of research, Jake Mbeta. We discussed his vision for the future of quantum computing. At IBM research, what we always do is answer what is the future of computing, whether it's coming up with new algorithms, coming up with better AI, coming up with quantum, or coming up with just how do different accelerators go together. It's our DNA to answer the question of what is the future. Isn't it a perfect problem for IBM because you kind of need to have a legacy of building stuff. Yes. Building actual physical machines.

Yeah, it's why I came to IBM. I wanted the experience, the culture of building hard things that others have not done before. Where do you imagine we are in the timeline of this technology? There will come a point when it will mature. Right? My cell phone is a mature technology at this point. How far are we from that point with quantum? By 2029, we'll build the first fault-tolerant quantum computer.

That is one that can run a very, very large, large problem. To learn how IBM is building the future of computing, visit IBM.com slash quantum. All right, quick quiz for the hiring managers out there. What's worse? Being understaffed or being poorly staffed? Well, that's a trick question, because both are recipes for chaos. Either way, just say to yourself, this is a job for Indeed's sponsored jobs. You'll get matched with candidates that meet the skills, certifications, and everything else you're looking for. Or go a different way and get no traction.

Seriously, sponsored jobs posted directly on Indeed are 95% more likely to report a hire than non-sponsored jobs. It really is a no-brainer. Spend less time searching and more time actually interviewing candidates who check all your boxes. Less stress, less time, more results. When you need the right person to cut through the chaos, this is a job for Indeed's sponsored jobs. And listeners of this show will get a $75 sponsored job credit to help your job get the premium status it deserves at Indeed.com slash podcast. Just go to Indeed.com slash podcast right now. Indeed.com slash podcast. Terms and conditions apply. Need to hire? This is a job for Indeed Sponsored Jobs.

2025 is going to be crazy for video games. What's coming out really? Well, Grant the thought of six, which is... Right. Fucking huge. It's going to be. That's going to be. Doom, Fable. You got a bunch of other stuff.

I'm not too sorry about Grandefo Six, man. If I'm being honest. It's because you haven't seen it yet. That's true. I haven't seen anything from it yet. So that'll change them. Lily's fucking off the walls about she loves Grand The Walls. She loves Grandfals.

It's one of her favorite games. Really? Yeah, she's a fucking hurting people. Ah. I can tell. So why don't she play like Red Dead? Huh? She's like, I don't like Cowboys.

And I'm like, I personally think, I don't like Cowboys either. It's not about Cowboys, though. That is so much more interesting than Grant Depp Auto because of the nature of like, that's a period of time I could never have lived in. That's for me why I like Red Dead more. It's also like just way, because we live in California. Like, oh, the Santa Monica Pier is like 20 minutes away. 25 minutes away. It's not like, okay, that looks impressive in the game, but I, everything that's in Red Dead 2, I can't fucking see that shit.

It's gone. Right. There's open fields. That doesn't exist in America anymore, really. Red Dead 2 is so good that I don't like. Cowboys at all and I loved it. Yeah I mean that's how that's how good at all. Now you probably like Cowboys no before you hated them. I still could never I still could not give a shit. I think Cowboys are so cool that's a cool period of time. I think it's so dumb. They're saying they're

like oh cow poke what are you doing and then they get into a duel and then they get fucking sepsis and die it's the lame as shit that's lit as fuck it's dim in fact. It's quite dim and grim. I like I mean I like the the outlaw bounty hunter kind of dynamic I like that too but that doesn't need to be a, you know what I mean? That could be anywhere. That's my favorite part about it. That's cool.

The whimsical racism. We're like, there's probably no ill-intentioned behind it. There is a whimsyness to it. There's like a, like a. Yeah, there's like a fairy like. Because he genuinely thinks that's the way you're described. Yeah. Well, I mean.

Yeah. For the time. Yeah. Okay, good, good, good. You cleared up. That's what you do. Yeah, for the time. Yeah, pre-1996.

Ninety-1996. Get you a matter. Pre-old sweet, pre-2012. Yeah, that's what you called them. It's like, pre-2020, right? Pre-pendemic? That's crazy. They just changed that.

They just did. It just became socially un-okay. I'm going to be honest. That world would make a lot more sense to me. Yeah, because of the rampant racism that's still like a thing, it would almost kind of coincide. Like, it almost feels like if somebody came from olden times and then they saw things progressing and they got in a time machine, they'd probably assume, kind of like people assumed,

oh, in 2004. there'd be flying cars and shit. They probably would think people would probably be unified by then. In every fucking sci-fi, there's this human alliance and shit. And then we go to 2024. And then it's like, I'm reading a post. I'm reading a post on Twitter of this guy, Faised Nick Merks or whatever the fuck his name is.

And he was like, oh, trans people, gays, I don't fuck all that shit. That's real. He said they're not real. Trans people aren't real. And like his biggest donor was like, yo, that's fucked up. I'm your biggest donor. I've given you hundreds of.

subs, I'm top three tier, I'm all this shit. Like, why can't you just be cool with my community? He should get a refund. It's not real money. He should, but he blocked that guy. And then I'm looking at a drama alerts. They're the one that it ended up on my 4U, my 4U page. And then all the comments were just, why don't you respect his choices?

You know, like, so I'm like, so, so you're saying we should respect bigotry. Well, the thing, it's not even, to me, it's not even like, it's just, well, it even, it accelerates beyond bigotry to the point where it's not even that anymore. It's just dumb. It's just like, what do you, like, these people are not real, but you're afraid and angry at them. Yeah. So what does that fucking mean? It means nothing. That's like, that's like, you're like, oh, I'm angry.

Imagine being angry at ghosts while not believing in ghosts. Like, it's so, it's such a fucking straight. Like, it's not even bigotry. It's just stupid. It is literally like like mouse brain shit. It is kind of like it goes It goes hand in hand like to be right to be a biggie. You have to be astronomically stupid.

You gotta be you gotta be idiotic. Right but like the way I think about bigotry is like the way Because the only bigotry that I really like analyze is the kind of thing that like pretends to be smart. You know what I mean? It's like like the Calvin Candy and fucking what is it? Where it's like here's a scientific explain and it's just wrong. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But like this is just like there's just like there.

not real. They're not real. And it's like, what does that mean? Like, I've heard no idea. No one's really like that. It's like, bro, I'm, I'm actually that. It's a weird, it's a weird thing to say. I mean, because like, because even, here's the thing about it. Yeah, go ahead. Even if you disagreed with it, right? They're still there. Yeah. You know? That's the thing. Like, I don't agree with like religion, but I would never really, like, Christians aren't real. Yeah, yeah, exactly. I don't get it I don't know how many times in this podcast How many times I've said that I am convinced

We're in a fucked up version of the Matrix That like it got like I keep saying the alien overlords Spilt whatever alien soda on the servers They're shorting out they need to fix it Because the programs that they program for us It's somewhat something went wayward I think a clown came on our universe Yeah just like he submerged our universe

and clowncom. Something happened because things like that because don't you agree things like that just shouldn't happen like saying

well just hold on it's important to bring up the fact because there was like there was some lady who got who got she was doing like some TikTok or something

and she just said the N word oh this lady and she like basically like a instant she built like an overnight career off of it it was planned I kind of think

that's what's happening really I kind of think like I don't think he doesn't believe what he's saying, but I think he's like, well, I'm just going to say this and just make a lot of money. Well, he feels like that. I think, I don't think, I don't think, I think people are not that smart. I think people are sellouts, though. I think people are sellouts, 100%. I don't know about that

guy. Him personally, he just seems like, uh, the, the people that you run into that are, you know, like say, let's, let's, let's be 100% real about this. And I'm not going to get deep into it, but, um, escape go right now for all the bad stuff that's been happening in the pandemic and all that shit was Anthony Fauci, right? He'd been around for like 50 years. He'd been working the government since like Reagan and shit. And that's like the scapegoat. They're like, oh, he's like the worst thing and the most evil. And I'm like, all right, here's the thing though, guys. This is how like these people, their brains are so fried that I'm like, wait. So your president was your boy, right? Donald Trump was the president in 2020. He's the guy that shut everything down. He did Operation Warp Speed. He still had

Fauci employed. He's the one that took credit dozens of times for the vaccines. But they all blame Fauci. So I'm like, wait, so are you telling me that Fauci is more powerful than the president of the United States? Yeah, it's all. No, but like that, that thinking that like, I'm like, I always say, how does your brain get to that level? And so I feel like that Nick Merck's guy, he's one of those people that he literally doesn't take a millisecond to think. No, no, no, he doesn't think at all. He's a call to this. Yeah. I don't think he's a call. He's a call to, he's a I don't think he's planning anything out. With all due respect, which is very little.

They're not real harder, harder, harder, harder. They're not real hard or harder, hard on. He grew up bathing in like, like, it was just probably his first word, really. He popped out of the room with the womb shouting the N-word, tap dancing to like fucking Mammy music. And like, that's how he, that's the birth of Nick Marks probably. His fucking dads in the other room playing.

I don't know anything about this guy other than he's dumb. His dad's in the other room playing Commando on fucking Nintendo. That's like the equivalent. They're just fucking playing Commando. He's that's playing commando and still calling the enemies the N-W. Yeah, 100%. Like that was the equivalent. That's the best way he'd come to.

Imagine a child play. Imagine a father and son playing Mario together. Calling the gumbas. And the father shouts the N-word at the gumbas and shit. That is like what that reality is. That's, I mean, to be fair to all those people, though, who are criticizing that there is that video of Dr. Fauci where he's eating, he's eating a dog. hole, which I thought was a little

fucking... He in fact has a mall. He does not have a mouth. There's a maw. He opens his mouth and then it cracks open. It like goes to the side a little bit and then it elongates like that image of the nostalgia critic screaming. Yeah. And then it's several rows of teeth. I got to tell you, I was pretty traumatized

by seeing that, especially hearing the Beagle like scream. Like, oh! Help me, help me! Like screaming. Yeah, when it spoke English, I knew it was something. But that's what the test was. Yeah. Because that's what the serum that he was testing was Like he was, I want to see if my dog can speak human language. Yeah.

So he injected him with a serum, but it wouldn't do it. So he tried to scare it by eating it. Yeah. And then he ate it. And he's like, damn, I can't control my mom. I'm sorry. I need another beagle. And then they just bring in like a dumpster truck full of them.

They just just, just, like, zz. And he starts and then while he's there working, he's just eating on them. He's just, uh, nope. No. He can't stop eating dogs. Still to this day, he live streams every day on kick. And he eats dogs. He's on kick.

Anthony Falci. It's on kick. I'm forget. Pick's all the things. That's the around. I'm sure it is, but it's degenerate. It's central.

So I saw two. It should head twitch. I follow a couple of commentary, uh, YouTubers and they made videos on, I forget the, the guy's name. Actually, yeah,

I don't remember at all, but he was a, he made a joke. His entire existence was pretending, well, meta, he was pretending to be a pedophile. but Wally being like a pedophile essentially.

Like he was making jokes. Like, oh, this is, I'm so edgy. I'm going to pretend like, oh, I love 16 year olds. They're so awesome. He kept making edgy jokes. Like, he's in the bed with this girl and saying she's underage and stuff. He was making these meta jokes. Why they're meta is because they had a party or whatever the fuck.

They had a party. And then the one rule is supposed to be, all right, you can only, without an ID, you can't come in. And then they still, some girl got in. And even it was just all week. wishy-washy and they're on, you know, they're live streaming. They're IRL streamers. And eventually, it turns out the girl that was in there that had a shaky story from the beginning, didn't have an ID all of a sudden and randomly showed up with an ID, which was not the original date she even said. It said like 1998, but when she said she was born in 2005 at first when

they asked her. And then long story short, they find out through, uh, they find her in her Facebook and they find her dad. And they're like, what the fuck? She's 16. And, you know, those guys like, he was, you know, they were doing some weird shit. They essentially got banned from Kik and I was like, surprise, because Kik is full of that shit. So I was surprised that I guess that story got big enough for Kicks like, oops, we got to get rid of one. Yeah, I feel like Kik content is literally like, watch me hit on children.

Yeah. Or like, uh, watch me punch a guy in the back of the head until he dies and like behind a Denny's. Like that's the kind of stuff that's on Kik really. We just cornered this man. And this guy's like, hey, I'm right. And they started beating him to death on stream. That's what KIC is, really.

I got to say, it's made Twitch look a lot better. It has, yeah. Twitch is crazy, by the way. It does, but that's a horrible website. Because Twitch, Twitch, this is the thing, right? Kick is full of shitlords, right? Twitch just lies about who they care about promoting. Yeah, they pretend, yeah.

So it's like, one's a liar. One's a truer. Well, they're both. They both lie. But they truth too hard. Because there was kick. I think Kik is like kicking people off too. What do they do?

I don't know. I remember seeing a story where like they kick somebody off to it off kick Which is like all right well that kind of I know they kicked Hayes and the whole point is that you You probably have to do some really fuck because that's what I'm saying What did they do? What did you some fuck shit though? He must have?

What could you possibly do to get kicked off kick? I don't know. Like okay obviously I feel like you have to set the CEO on fire to get kicked off kick. I feel like if you beat somebody to death I feel like that might be it But no I mean that got balls like that though I mean, that has happened. That's crazy.

The kick is crazy. There was some blonde chick. All she does is drive around on while stream and drive around and shit. And she's gotten in like multiple accidents. She hit a, she hit a woman. Like a woman? Yeah, so like you can't see it because the phone is like on her lap or some shit. Which is, which is insane in the first fucking place.

You're streaming. And then her phones and her fucking lap. And then all of a sudden you hear, boom. And then all of a sudden you hear this girl like kind of like, Oh, what the fuck. And she's like, oh, I'm sorry. Like, what do you want me to do? And I'm like, what?

She asked the girl she hit. What do you want me to do? That's like, I don't know. I don't know. Call the fucking ambulance. What the fuck? I'm driving off. You know how fucked up and train rates are, man.

I'm fucking like, well. Yeah, I mean, if you're that much of degenerate, I'm surprised. Like, why not just? I'll drop a med kit. I'll drop up. I put a medicate then up. Like, if you can make it to this. Best of luck.

I'll tell you what I want you to do. I want you to unhit me. Can you unhit me? Take the force you put into my body and the damage you gave to me and put it back. Yeah. Put it back. Take it all back.

Transmute this damage, please. I have to go to war. Take the force back. Like, oh, my bad. You just go, you wave your hands. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You unbreak their bones. You undent your bumper.

Like, are you good now? Thank you very much. Bro, I wish. I would be very responsible if that was a real power. Like, if you can, like, undo dance. Hello, hello, I'm Malcolm Gladwell, host of Smart Talks with IBM. I recently spoke with IBM's new director of research, Jake Mbeta.

We discussed his vision for the future of quantum computing. At IBM research, what we always do is answer what is the future of computing, whether it's coming up with new algorithms, coming up with better AI, coming up with quantum, or coming up with just how do different accelerators go together. It's our DNA to answer the question of what is the future. Isn't it a perfect problem for IBM because you kind of need to have a legacy of building stuff? Yes. Building actual physical machines.

Yeah, it's why I came to IBM. I wanted the experience, the culture of building hard things that others have not done before. Where do you imagine we are in the timeline of this technology? There will come a point. when it will mature, right? Yeah. My cell phone is a mature technology at this point. How far are we from that point with quantum?

By 2029, we'll build the first fault-tolerant quantum computer. That is one that can run a very, very large, large problem. To learn how IBM is building the future of computing, visit IBM.com slash quantum. All right, quick quiz for the hiring managers out there. What's worse? Being understaffed or being poor? poorly staffed. Well, that's a trick question, because both are recipes for chaos. Either way, just say to yourself, this is a job for Indeed's sponsored jobs. You'll get matched with candidates

that meet the skills, certifications, and everything else you're looking for, or go a different way, and get no traction. Seriously, sponsored jobs posted directly on Indeed are 95% more likely to report a hire than non-sponsored jobs. It really is a no-brainer. Spend less time searching and more time actually interviewing candidates who check all your boxes. Less stress, less time, more results. When you need the right person to cut through the chaos, this is a job for Indeed's sponsored jobs. And listeners of this show will get a $75-sponsored job credit to help your job get the premium

status it deserves at Indeed.com slash podcast. Just go to Indeed.com slash podcast right now. Indeed.com slash podcast. Terms and conditions apply. Need to hire? This is a job for Indeed sponsored jobs. Like, I would do a lot of... Would you beat somebody to death and then undo the damage on them?

Well, see, the problem is... Just to say you did it? The only people I... Well, yeah, yeah. So what I would do is, like, say, some of the... There's like, you know, there's only a handful of people that I despise, right? I would beat them to death without only... I would leave them...

I'd revive them within an inch, you know? Because, like, there's some people that I don't want to... If you put somebody... So this is the thing, right? I'll be within an inch of your life, right? Yeah. They're going to die still. They're too damage.

to be fine. I want to beat them enough to where they can recover in like three months. Recover fully or pretty much? Well,

maybe they'll have nerve damage. They'll have nerve damage. They'll have nerve damage. We're not doing for a four of them. Like their face will be like they had like all

cerebral, no, no, no, all Bell's palsy combined. You're like, everyone that's ever had Bell's palsy

every single palsy in the world. And then you just have it multiple palsy. Your face is like fucking like, like off. It is, it is twitched off

of your fucking face. Like it is a smiling All of his face. It'll be like a quay... That implies that there's like a lot. There's like you could collect them. You can collect Bell's Balzies. It's a dragon palsy.

The Pauls balls. That is so stupid. You collect all the falzies. Dragon palsy. And then you summon a dragon and then it's like a shake. It's vibrating. She's moving fast as fucking hearing. I feel bad about that actually.

It was funny how Jamie Fice was able to become a werewolf and then he became a fucking shaker. It's wild. Jamie Fox? He has something. Not Jamie Fox. You made Michael Dave Fox. Jesus Christ.

Same thing. Other Fox. Same thing. Yeah, same thing. We should swap their roles entirely and everything they've ever been in and see how well they go. They're both funny guys.

They're both pretty funny guys. Jamie Foxx is back to the future would be terrible. Nah, that'd be hilarious. Young Jamie Fox. That'd be so bad. From the Jimmy Fox show in back to the future.

It would be, yeah, it wouldn't, well, it would be really bad. If you went to, if you went to, the past it would be really bad for him it would not work what's he doing here? What's he doing here without a leash? That's crazy. You got out of your boy. He just pretend to be a monkey and he'd be coming around with Doc and he'd be like, that ape of yours got clothes on.

If you could rewind time, right, any moment, right? Yeah. Would you kill someone and then go back in time to undo it? What do you mean? Like kill someone and then go back in time to stop yourself? No, no, no, no. I mean like I'm thinking like blinks to time sweeper rules. So like I punch you in the temple and kill you. I just rewind time and like five minutes and you're back to you're back to where you were. Well, what happens is does it make all because the thing is if it if you go back in time and do something when you go back in time, will you be doing it again?

No, no. I already explain the rules to you. I already I literally laid out the rules for you. Then that's just lame. It's just linear. It's just linear like like a checkpoint of video game. Yeah, it's like a timeline. That's not fun one.

That's not fun. But you could then get you could get a lot of frustrations out. like that. Yeah. Yeah. It was like you could punch somebody in the face and then undo it immediately. You'd live life with a consequence basically. Oh yeah. You become a monster. You'd become you'd actually become so powerful. It's crazy. You become a demon. I mean it's it's a it's a reminds me of I remember the first time I played I think it was GTA three and there was a I think eight ball is in that one and he's uh he's this black gentleman and I just had like I just found the code where you can like explode people's heads you know like you like because because if you

shoot him the head. It was just a little blood and they would fall. And then I was like, oh, this is so cool. So instead of continuing the mission with A ball, I just kept blowing his head off and I was having so much fun because they need you like, once you kill them, they restart to the checkpoint. So I was just doing scenarios, just killing this guy. And that's essentially what that is. It's like going back in time. It's not any crazier than doing the hoard mode with the cops and shit. It's like the same kind of thing. I never really, I mean, like, I would say I would kill cops, but I wouldn't like you guys go hard with it.

Shit is so fun. Hiles of body. I don't know how you don't understand how fun that is. I would love killing the black ones. He's like Carl Winslow. And I was like, you're not getting back. You're not getting back to your family.

He did look like Carl Winslow. The black cop? Yeah, the fat black cop. The ones who have the shotguns in on DT-A-4. They look like Carl Winslow. Actually. Probably was... I don't know.

It was probably by design, I don't remember. I'd shoot him in a leg and he'd fall down. And when he's getting up, I'd blow the back and set off every time. It was a combo. It was a leg to him. Head it, let the head combo. I got to find this picture of, uh, of, uh, Red Dead 2 that it's my favorite.

I want to get this actually on a poster. It is, uh, poster you want to say, because it's, it's so, just the thought of it. Essentially, I hope I can find it because of sending cops, dude. Like it's like that, like, stop. That's kind of is. It really is, it really, I wonder if they're going to have like, I wonder if, because this game's going to, the next GTA is going to be so big, it's crazy. But I wonder if they're going to, I wonder how different it's going to be as far as, like, AI goes. Like, I wonder if they're going to be like, like,

If you've been killing cops like crazy, I wonder if they'll just nuke the hospital if you're, if you're bombing. Just bomb it. Like, I would be cool to do that. Like a tactical missile and they send it in a bomb. A fucking bunker buster. Like, look at like, why at this point, you got to stop. The dude is literally on a, he's like on a hill of bodies and he's still trying to. And he's still trying to take you out.

Like, he's still trying to take you out on top of at least 20 bodies. You gotta stop at a certain point. At a certain point when you're, you are brave enough, that is one of the bravest men ever. He turns the corner and it's fucking silent hill and he's gonna go like, I'm gonna go in there. I'm gonna get him. There are people on the ceiling. That's how bad it is. He's like, I gotta stop him.

If I don't, he would kill other people. It's like it's like they all believe they're the chosen one. Right, right. And say every single one of the thoughts like, I've got to go it alone. You're on a five story building and there's like a 10 foot gap between. the next building, 100% of the people fell to their deaths and you still try. Like, it's like, like, I know

I got this. I feel that way about most video game antagonists though, or like most video game enemies where I'm like, yo, why are you approaching Master Chief still? At a certain point, like, if you are a thinking breathing, responsible being, like, if you're even remotely, it's not a fucking... I understand, I understand, but like if you think about it just like a layer deep, it's like

no grunt is coming. By the third game, no grunt is approaching me. Yeah, it's like, are you joking? No Grunt would approach you. I mean, the first one's like, whatever. Because they don't know you. They haven't had the time to hear about you yet. That's true they die.

You know? But by two and three, Destiny especially, man. Like, I don't, like, because that's, these are people that can resurrect themselves. You know what I mean? About, like, it's crazy, is that that's one guardian. That is one. There are hundreds, I think maybe thousands of guardians. Yeah, also, Mass Effect as well.

It's like, this guy, Shepherd literally died. And then you're seeing him still and you're like, oh, I'm gonna tell you like, like, yo, no, I'm not, he was meat. Yeah,

he was meat. Yeah, you know, he was meat and then he was not me anymore. God, man. I, I, I've been thinking about Mass Effect a lot lately, and I really want to play, I really want to play through that legendary edition.

Like, I've been itching to play something like that. I'm still, last fish those games. I'm getting, like, I'm getting a little worn out from like, man with sword games.

Yeah. You know right now? Or, like, with sword game like I'm kind of I'm gonna play Eldon ring the the DLC and all that stuff but like I'm a really kind of burned out on this stuff I think Massaac is probably a good change of pace I don't know what I'm playing right now I'm playing 80s though 80s too yeah just playing that that's it yeah really

maybe maybe some fortnight you play fortnight you play fortnight yeah a little bit I know because Lily loves me playing it she loves like watching it played oh yeah that's like her game because it's like so weird her brain to understand like what's cool it's colorful enough and And it's slow enough of a shooting game while being engaging enough for her to like understand it. Because the other fast-paced one, she's like, what the fuck's happening? Yeah, Destiny's impossible. It's hard to fucking keep up, man.

She can't. She doesn't have a gamer's brain. She just doesn't want, like she just won't. She's like my mom. My mom has grown up with computers as long as I have. And she refuses to just be savvy. Like she just won't do it. She won't do it.

Like the first computer I've ever had, obviously my mom got it. So she's had it just as long. Well, she just doesn't care. She just doesn't give it shit. That's what I mean. That's exactly my point. It's totally fine not to give a shit. I think for her,

she just, she doesn't play games like that. She plays cozy games. Look, man. Let's plant, let's plant, I understand. And then grow it.

I understand. Like, look, there was a, there is, like, on one of the RPGs I play, there's,

you can, you can do the speed of times two. And times one to me seems like they're under fucking water. But apparently that's like some standard movement. And I'm like, why would you ever want a video game where people are moving,

like with the standard, like a human, speed. It feels... I like it. It feels funny because it feels more dangerous. That's why. I love it. It depends on the game. I think if the point of the game is that, like, if it's like a horror game or something, it's like, okay. A horror game, maybe, but I guess I'm thinking of anything that's like action related. Oh, yeah, action getting that'd be insane. Like, it's, it's weird. If you're a slower version of Resonial, it would get a slow games down, slow everything down. I mean, like you increase the speed of the enemies, but you have your speed.

I mean, you can do it. I actually, I probably... You're just struggling. I probably can find the trainers to do that and, like, make Mr. X like, like a cheetah. That's terrible. He just gets you instantly. The moment when you meet him, he gets you. Yeah, like, and not got to me. The fucking, the, the helicopters crash and shit, and he moves out of the way and he just

punches you immediately. Capcom sends out, like, one of those, like, JPEG messages, like, that a lot of studios send out on Twitter where it's like, hey, we're sorry, we made Mr. X real fucking fast in the game. We have no way to fix it. This is how it is. We have no way to fix it. And fix it and you will destroy the game.

You can't finish the game because Mr. X will catch you within 10 milliseconds of you seeing him, but he's how it is. Sorry. Sorry. Thanks for the sales. Being at you already. He throws three punches by the time you see one of them and you die.

He goes like, this is so stupid. He goes up and down the stairs like, oh my God, like, what's that guy? The yellow guy from smiling friends is like, I steal these things, man. He like runs up the stairs real fast.

That's how fast he moves. You just hear him. A little bitter pattern. All throughout. You're like, yo, what? What? You have to actually hide, like, for real hide. Yeah, that would be a completely different game.

Imagine playing a game like Gears of War, but, like, you know those sequences when you're talking? And it makes you slow down and it makes you slow down. Yeah. That's the base movement speed. Or that's the fastest that you can go. I would never have played that franchise. No one would have played it.

Never. Terrible. That shit, I hate that. That was really annoying. That is universally. That is unanimously the low parts of those games. We're like, you want to go, Anya, fucking, I'm stretching my legs out. I know it's a war, but I'm going to take my fucking sweet time.

My balls are sticking to my thigh. Anya. I need dude wipes now. They're more elephant than human in that game, and it really bothers me. It really bothers me how they're just. He's like sponsored. Yeah, out his fucking gear. This made a call brought to you by

Dollar Shade Club They haven't paid me yet Dom They haven't paid I did their ad and they still haven't given me any money What the fuck? My payment's in escrow Oh my God

So fucking stupid Yeah those fucking I actually So I did break the The pacing of Red Dead 2 where there are sequences where you can only walk like in your camp and in certain areas

running around doing it so just unlocked it the funniest thing so I just made it to a what is it Cuba or whatever the fuck yeah not and like there's a yeah yeah so there's that

there's that part where you're fucked up and you're like just all days and you're walking I'm spreading so I'm all fucked up it's hazy and I'm fucking it is I was fucking dying dude it doesn't get helicopter

vision too it pans out like where you're just like, uh, and then I'm just, I thought it was gonna break the game, but it was smooth. I've really only ever dabbled in mods, really.

I don't mod games, usually. I don't really do it. Unless I'm doing nude mods, other than that I don't really mind. Even those I don't really do. I don't know how you guys don't. I think about it,

actually, what I think it is. I think it's because, like, I don't feel like it counts. Or like it, or like it muddies my experience of what the game is,

and then it kind of, it kind of, what I mean you mod it after you beat it? Well, that's what I'm saying, It's like, but even just like going forward and remembering, like, wait, was that in the game? I know I played that in the game, like years later where it's like, wait, could you run in the camp? It's like, wait, no, could you?

Oh, no, you couldn't. I modded that in. Then it kind of, it kind of becomes like, what was my version of this? And what was the previous one? I understand modding. I just don't really do it. I beat the game first. Usually if I go back to it, let me and see I'll like mod it if I go back.

My thing is, I don't even monitor. I just feel like, well, what's the, like, what's the benefit of having a PC over a console if you're not going to fuck with the games. Honestly. Yeah, I mean, I get it. I just,

I mean, the benefit is really, obviously, like, frame rate and resolution in every other aspect. There's some of those, there's some of those things, but I think,

sometimes the optimization in, uh, fucking consoles, you can, the game could look fucking pretty phenomenal. No, for sure, but like,

then there are other ones, like, the ones that really put, like, Final Fantasy 16 was rough on, um, PS5 and then, like,

uh, it was better on console, it was better on PC yet, but like, when it is, it's, you know, it will be. And then, like, Alan Wake 2 had, like,

a kind of, like, you had to go performance mode because it just couldn't handle. Like, I don't know. There's reasons. And I think usually, like, the most I'll go is, like, I'll go to, like, a dot I and I file, and I'll be, like, change a couple of things here or there. I'll change, like, the field of view or something.

Because, like, how the fuck... Dude, I have played call duty campaigns day one recently, like, in the last, like, couple years that have no FOV sliders in the campaign. And I'm like, how are you fucking doing this? You're making me, you make me look through like a fucking fish-eye telescope at my gun.

This is so disorienting. It's like... It's very... It's terrible. I really... But it's in the multiplayer. I was like, what the fuck? It's...

It's... It's the same. ...or just one step ahead of, uh, uh, uh, sports gamers. They're just one step ahead. Like, they're above. Because the sports is just the dumbest people on the fucking planet. I'm excited for Madden again. I fucking...

Dude, it breaks my heart because... I can't wait for Brett Farve to calm on my face. my fate. It breaks my fucking heart because NBA, it's the only basketball available. There's no competition. They used to be live, but they got rid of them. Yeah. And because now, NBA right now, 2K has the exclusive rights

to the NBA, so nobody can even make anything like legitimate. And it breaks my heart because I love basketball games and I love fucking around on them too. Like, it's really fun, but they keep shutting down the servers so I can't even do, like, you'll spend time in my career building

up your character. And then they'll fucking shut the servers off two years later so you can't fucking play that shit anymore. To force you to get the new ones. And they've stripped, especially if you're a PC gamer, they stripped everything from the games. Like, on the consoles, they'll

update the, like, oh, there's a new story, there's a new city. It's still kind of shitty, but PC they took everything away and they'll still charge you 60 bucks. And I'm like, it's because the people are stupid, yeah. So there's no story anymore. There's no

There's no next-gen graphics on PC. That's true. There's nothing. They've done, so right now they're going to release 2K-25, I think, in September or some shit. I haven't played a 2K game since like 2K. Hello, hello. I'm Malcolm Gladwell, host of Smart Talks with IBM. I recently spoke with IBM's new director of research, Jake Mbata. We discussed his vision for the future of quantum computing.

At IBM research, what we always do is answer what is the future of computing, whether it's coming up with new algorithms, coming up with better AI, coming up with quantum, or coming up with just how do different accelerators go together. It's our DNA to answer the question of what is the future. Isn't it a perfect problem for IBM because you kind of need to have a legacy of building stuff? Yes. Building actual physical machines. Yeah, it's why I came to IBM.

I wanted the experience, the culture of building, hard things that others have not done before. Where do you imagine we are in the timeline of this technology? There will come a point when it will mature. Right? My cell phone is a mature technology at this point. How far are we from that point with Conton? By 2029, we'll build the first fault-tolerant quantum computer.

That is one that can run a very, very large, large problem. To learn how IBM is building the future of computing, visit IBM.com slash quantum. All right, quick quiz for the hiring managers out there. What's worse? Being understaffed or being poorly staffed? Well, that's a trick question

because both are recipes for chaos. Either way, just say to yourself, this is a job for indeed sponsored jobs. You'll get matched with candidates that meet the skills, certifications, and everything else you're looking for. Or go a different way and get no traction. Seriously, sponsored jobs posted direct

on Indeed are 95% more likely to report a higher than non-sponsored jobs. It really is a no-brainer. Spend less time searching and more time actually interviewing candidates who check all your boxes. Less stress, less time, more results. When you need the right person to cut through the chaos, this is a job for Indeed sponsored jobs. And listeners of this show will get a $75 sponsored job credit to help your job get the premium status it deserves at Indeed.com slash podcast. Just go to Indeed.com slash podcast right now. Indeed.com slash podcast. Terms and conditions apply. Need to hire? This is a job for Indeed's sponsored jobs. 12? So I got back into it in 2K19 and it was actually a pretty good game. And then like they, which one was the one with 15? With Jake from State Farm.

Oh, oh, Jake from State Farm was probably 20. No, no, no, it was probably like 23 or 22. It was 23 or 22. Because yeah, there's a center where you can walk in and there's a state farm fucking thing and Jake's there. And I was like, I can't believe they put this asshole in here. But they've, they've been, they've been treat, they can treat it's like the gotcha genre. Because that's all they're doing. Oh yeah. And they treat those people like dog water. And it's just like, bro, I want, it's like, it's like society, man.

I'm like, we just want people, we just want people to be a little bit smarter so we can have better things. Right. And I'm like, I just want a solid. How is it that I can go on Xbox 3 fucking 60 and jump into a server and play some Call of Duty 2? I can play, sorry, Modern Winfair 2. I can still fucking go on the maps

and, you know, it's all a modded disaster. It's a disaster. It's a disaster, but I can still play. Yeah. And then they're like, you're running, you're running through like high rise and then a fucking Michelin man shows up. And you're like, oh.

Dude, I really got to fight Aldwin all of a sudden. There's a, like, what? I'll do it shows up. He shows up on a high rise. Boom. Hear my soul. And I'm like, why?

It's fucking, it's a disaster. Most of the people there will win by not even moving. They're shooting the fucking, yeah, it is literally they haven't moved. I think game body is so fucking funny.

Because it's so funny because people's reactions, dude. Like my friend, he would, he would, I ain't bought war. At war.

Yeah. And people would say them, why? I need to be the fucking late. To upset people. It is. I get that too. I get that.

In my world, those people would be killed, I think. They would be. Yeah, just people who like cheat on online games. People who cheat. Cheating on online games is so weird.

I think people that cheat, if you're just doing it to be a cunt, I think it's funny. I think it's funny. That's the only reason to do it, so like he would be shot in my world. People, but your friend would have his face peeled off it

and shoved down his throat, I think. People that cheat in a competitive sense are fucking insane. But, Well, there's competitive. There's not anymore. There's no difference. There's a lot of...

There's no difference anymore. What do you mean? It's all the same. Because skill-based matchmaking is kind of ruined all that. Like, there is no such thing as like social playlist and competitive playlist. All playlists and all multiplayer games are just competitive by nature. It's just how they've designed games now. Not exactly.

Most of the time, yes, but not exactly... Like 99% of the time it's like that. There are no more social playlist. Well, the people that are going to enter the competitive playlist are always going to be people that are more on the competitive line. Like I understand what skill-based madmaking does. kind of blurs them a lot in every universal place. No, but Kinks said, why wouldn't you cheat in a competitive environment? Like, why wouldn't you?

Why? What would be the purpose in cheating in a social? Like, that's insane, actually. Just to be a fuckhead. Well, but why? No, but you're more of a fuckhead if you do it in a competitive scene. Well, the thing is that competitive scene is, it's supposed to be the patient. You're like, all right, I'm going to bring my actual school to see how good I am.

No, but why wouldn't somebody looking to fuck with people go to the place where people take the game more seriously? Because I'd assume people would have some sort of respect for the game. No, your friend is not that person. Oh, no, we were younger. We were not adults doing it. We were younger. You'd be like, oh, yeah, for sure. Right, but this is what I'm talking about.

It's like the only incentive to cheat at an online game is to upset people. And the only real way to upset people is to go into a competitive game and cheat. Like, you're not going to do it in like social, like, who the fuck cares? I think that's what people would do it because when people were there. I think you forget how like care about etiquette is insane. They're already cheating. What about the egotistical nature of people just wanting to be perceived? at like, even if it's a fake alkyade,

they just like having that thing. Yeah, that's why I play trials. I don't play trials because, like, I'm playing it because I want to see how good I am at the game actually, right? And a lot of people cheat there because the rewards are better for winning trials, obviously. Right. Yes. That's what I'm saying.

But, like, if I'm going to, like, you do a cheating method, I'm doing it in, like, the social, the more social playlist. You say that because you're not the person who would cheat. That's true. That is true. You're trying to force your brain. That's true. I'm not a cheater. The headspace of somebody who would do that and it's not compatible.

I'm not a cheater, but the idea is that like, because I think it's funny if you're doing it. Like, if you're on fucking rust and some guys walking around and you shoot a shotgun and he already dies, I think that's fucking hilarious. It's like raining ordinance on people. They can't do anything. It's, it's insane to me. Like, I understand the, it's more of a spectator. When you talk about like pissing people off, that that's this, like, there's a spectator aspect of it that, I'm like, Yeah, I see how that's funny for like 30 seconds.

Like I'm like, oh, it's like I saw, there's one of my favorite clips of 2K, a guy who joins a match? No, there is, there is a nine foot tall person. And then there's a 50 foot tall. Like, I can't, I don't know the, it is. He's literally completely like off the court. It is the funniest fucking thing. Like the guy who's recording it, he's mad, but then he just starts bursting out and laughter because of how absurd it is. That's too funny.

I like the woman like LeBron and Lord. and he like he jumps and he blocks it from the other side of the court and then he runs and he dunts it from like well and beyond after like and I'm like that's fucking funny like it's funny for a little bit that's then after a while like say why people on PC 2K they're like this this sucks because they don't do anything apparently now they've over corrected and now like even simple things is I don't do PVP I'm not a PVP guy so I just want you have to be online just to play my career which has nothing to do with PVP.

So stupid. And then so, because it's like, they treat it like life service fucking bullshit. And so now I can't even put on my, I just want to be in my NBA career and fuck around. And I can't even do that anymore. Like, so I can't even put on my trainers to play PVE because they just,

they just nuke the entire thing. And this is, I fucking hate, I hate. PVP keeps people playing, man, unfortunately. I just hate that like, we, in every aspect, all we have to do is just not give these motherfuckers money. Hello, hello. I'm Malcolm Gladwell. host of Smart Talks with IBM.

I recently spoke with IBM's new director of research, Jake Embatta. We discussed his vision for the future of quantum computing. At IBM Research, what we always do is answer what is the future of computing, whether it's coming up with new algorithms, coming up with better AI, coming up with quantum, or coming up with just how do different accelerators go together. It's our DNA to answer the question of what is the future. Isn't it a perfect problem for IBM because you kind of need to have a legacy of building stuff?

Yes. Building actual physical machines. Yeah, it's why I came to IBM. I wanted the experience, the culture of building hard things that others have not done before. Where do you imagine we are in the timeline of this technology? There will come a point when it will mature. Right? Yeah.

My cell phone is a mature technology at this point. How far are we from that point with quantum? By 2029, we'll build the first fault-tolerant quantum computer. That is one that can run a very, very large, large problem. To learn how IBM is building the future of computing, visit IBM.com slash quantum. All right, quick quiz for the hiring managers out there. What's worse? Being understaffed or being poorly staffed? Well, that's a trick question, because both.

are recipes for chaos. Either way, just say to yourself, this is a job for Indeed's sponsored jobs. You'll get matched with candidates that meet the skills, certifications, and everything else you're looking for. Or go a different way and get no traction. Seriously, sponsored jobs posted directly on Indeed are 95% more likely to report a hire than non-sponsored jobs. It really is a no-brainer. Spend less time searching and more time actually interviewing candidates who check all your boxes. Less stress, less time, more results. When you need the right person to cut through the chaos, this is a job for Indeed sponsored jobs.

And listeners of this show will get a $75-sponsored job credit to help your job get the premium status it deserves at Indeed.com slash podcast. Just go to Indeed.com slash podcast right now. Indeed.com slash podcast. Terms and conditions apply. Need to hire? This is a job for Indeed's sponsored jobs. It's the easiest thing we could all do.

We could all literally just be like We could all just literally be like Oh we're just not gonna if we literally don't give them money They will change But that's the people The people who are aware that they have to do that Are not the main clientele Of those games

Very true Like the people who play sports games Probably don't even They probably don't even know who makes these You know what I mean they're probably like They don't know anything about it I mean that genuinely They're just not people who pay attention to the space

Yeah Like they probably don't know what the fuck EA is And they're totally fine with like so they buy the game they buy the base game so like $70 now and they all know well aware that they have to pay an extra $60 or $70 to max out their character for it to even mean anything because you start off like as a 60 or something which is useless in the you're not you can't be a 60 something overall and being the fucking NBA that makes no sense but like you're suck you have no ball handling skills you have no shot and so you need to grind for months to even be like competitive or you pay another 90s insane. I remember getting to 90 and 2012. Yeah. And I was just like, I've been playing this game. Like, literally, I would finish my homework and I'd play that game if I wasn't going out.

Yeah. And I'm like, I'm still not even at like a 98. Yeah. 98 is where everybody's main character is. LeBron's a 96. What do I do? By design, they want you to give them money so then you can skip that fucking whole journey. That's what they need you to do that, essentially.

And they make it as hard as humanly possible to, do anything free to play and these people completely accepted it. They are, they expect, they, they're expecting every year to pay about a hundred and something dollars to enjoy that game every fucking year. And I'm like,

you guys, look, I'm, look, they ruined one of my favorite franchises. I, I, as somebody was an athlete growing up, right? Yeah. To sit down and watch a sport, I think it's kind of, unless you've played it, it's fucking moronic, I think. If you haven't played the sport, sitting on a

watching the stupidest thing ever because you're just watching somebody else to do it. Like the fact that I played basketball, I enjoy watching basketball. Like, I used to play the sport. So I kind of understand the idea is what people are doing. But some people just sit down and watch and they're like, yeah, I've watched this my whole life. What if they just understand? What if they just understand? Understanding it is fine.

But like, for me, I'm like, why am I going to watch a sport? Because I played soccer, so I like soccer. Do you not understand why people watch competitive sports? I don't care about it very often. No, I'm saying, but you're putting your, your, your experience on it. I'm meifying it, of course. But I'm saying, do you not understand why people in general watch sports? I guess they enjoy the entertainment aspect of it, obviously.

Well, they enjoy the competitive nature of things. Like, competing is so like, we've been competing since. Oh, for sure. Like literally even in evolution, we compete, right? Yeah, I get it. So it's just kind of ingrained us. But it's like, it's like, why? I don't, I don't, why?

You're just saying you're like. Like seeing the, seeing people, especially when you talk about pro, right? At the highest level. Yeah, it's the best. players doing it. But you do this and like even it's not like you're fighting. You're not a fighter but you watch like you know Street fighter. I do. I do

watch fighting sports too even though I've like I tried it. I got my ass beat out of it and I was like I'm not a fan of this but for me like watching because I just don't get watching watching especially if you like because if it's I don't know what you media don't get it I don't understand it's it's boring it's so boring to me that why that wise of it like especially if I never experienced the sport of myself

Is it just like do you I don't understand I don't understand your point saying like if you haven't experienced it, watching it as For me, my care comes from the fact that I've done it before. So seeing someone at the best of us. Does that mean you could only care about things that you've done before? Well, sports in particular, yeah. Why just sports? That is weird that that's the own, that's the arbitrary line that.

Because for me, for me, when I, when I did the sport, I was like, I was at my ability to be able to do it. And seeing somebody do it at a better, like a professional level was interesting to me before because I was like, I'm trying to learn to do it. and I'm trying to mimic their abilities. But then at the same point, I was, at a certain point, I was like, I just enjoy watching these people play because they're doing it at such a high level.

The thing that I used to be able to, I used to be involved in. But then, like, sports that I've never, like, partaken in or never really done anything of. I can't imagine watching that. But that's most people. That is most people. I guess, yeah.

And most people don't play sports. And that's most things. Most people don't do everything. You know what I mean? That's true. There's so much shit. That's why for me, because I'm like, I'm like, I'm watching. Oh, let's watch.

Just watch, just watch rugby. And I'm not fucking watching rugby. Rugs is pretty dope. I actually follow a rugby page on YouTube. I don't fucking, I can't give an into the fuck about rugby. I mean, it's,

it's, it's better, it's better. I mean, I don't give a fuck about sports, period. At all. Yeah,

yeah, you know, but I get it. I understand why people. I love what I'm looking soccer person. You know, people hate it. Most American is insane.

Huh? You, wait, wait, wait, but I played soccer growing up. That's why. When I was small, I played soccer.

Okay, whatever, man. It was fun to me. Plus is a cultural thing, you know. I just think, look bad. Shout out to all the people that enjoy soccer, football, whatever. Your sport needs some fucking work.

It needs some work. The field is way too big, and that shit makes me want to kill myself watching. It's crazy. Yes. The field is so big that the score is usually like three to two, and I'm like, Jesus, fucking that's a reach. Two to two. It's often not.

At the highest levels. At the highest levels, sometimes it'd be like one, You're like, let's go. We got a goal. It's fucking sick. That's okay. Because it's a fucking, that sport is fucking. I mean, that's kind of.

It's so fun to play. That's why. Field by 50% the sport is fun. They cut it by 50% they're going to have to cut people off the field to. Get rid of like three, four people. Like just like, like, look, I want to make it a 7-7 game instead of a fucking 11-11 game. That's what I'm saying, dude.

It would be much better. It would be, it's the big thing. I hate, I hate, I've, I've watched probably three soccer games my entire life. You gotta, have you been to a live soccer event? I've been to a galaxy. I've been to a galaxy game. But that was hot as shit and I was pissed off. You gotta go to one in the Caribbean or Latin America, bro.

It'll change your fucking life. Look, I, or the Middle East or something like that. The camaraderie of people like singing and fighting each other and shit, that's awesome. I like, like, rowdy fucking people around the world. Because, you know, we don't care about sock over here. But you go across the pond for anything. you just walk up and immediately someone punches you in the fucking face like you didn't even you didn't do anything you're like it's like we do a football football we tailgate that's our close thing to it but

a football is just like the football fans are not as lively as the soccer fans get like I went to a soccer game in Puerto Rico and it got insane yeah it got why it was like a local soccer game too like a big team it was like from San Juan and somebody from like near the bay and they were like I'll stab you and it's like dude they get the the thing the the thing the the thing the That's the thing that I don't know, the passion. The passion of like wanting to fight and kill people is insane. That's the one thing that I never. It represents their area, man.

It's like it's so heavily representing their area that that's why they care. I think it's insane too. It's more of like these people are too pussy to go to the army. And then so this is like their, this is like their equivalent of like, oh. Yeah, this is the war thing. I'm like, go join the army pussy. They're too pussy to join the army. They'll go in the stands and go and puff their chest on.

They're like, oh, soccer, oh, la, la, la, and shit. But then, like, if there's rifles, they'll, like, shit their pants immediately. But, like, so I'm like, they're cosplay. And the UK gets really bad. They get really fucking freaks. They're freaking. Like, people from Liverpool get out of pocket for soccer. They'll get out of their cars.

Like, they're waiting to park and they'll just get out of the car and start fucking fighting. There's, like, a wrong color. There's a wrong color flag. And immediately, like, no people. No words are. They'll really. through your fucking window shatter it to yake you out of

and it'll chump you. You know that episode of SpongeGrod where he like pushes himself through the steel wall slowly? Yeah, yeah. That's what happens. Oh, I might we rep mine over here and then they fucking, it's just whatever. That I can't. I'm like, sorry I'm on my way back to work. I work over this way.

Yeah. That's a bad thing. I already have a problem. Yoking, bro. I already have a problem just like I don't know, sports in general. I get why people watch it, I guess, because I understand why people watch things that they don't participate in. But this is so much of people, to me. So much of people doing people things.

People things. Combat sports are kind of fun to watch. It's like, you're running around, cool. I like it. Is this bad? They're just like so athletic, it's insane. Yeah, but I guess to me, it's like, it's not really interesting to me that people can do athletic things because. Well, yeah, we have.

I really don't, I really don't see a barrier of entry there unless you're like Ricky Berwick. What do you mean like say, so like, I feel like the, I feel like the lamest person in the world could just become that if they wanted to. I know you don't actually believe that. I really do believe that. But you don't. You just inject yourself with shit and then you're fine. No. And then it's like, okay, cool.

So, neat. So you at some, in some universe, you think you could join the NBA. In the NBA? No, but that's what I'm saying. It's like, oh, well, I just can't do that because I'm not tall. Like, okay, cool. All right. Yeah, so there's, there is, so you see these giant people who should almost be a different species, but we are different, but we're the same species because we can all breed, but they almost seem like a different species because there's such these fucking giants. Yeah, they don't seem like it. Okay, so here's what I'm going to say. They don't seem like, they don't seem that tall because they're all tall and they're all next to each other. They don't, that's just your perception of television. Right, that's what I'm saying. But like, knowing that these people are behemists that you can suck their dicks while they're, while you're standing. Right. You essentially, you're standing. You're essentially, you're standing.

and you can suck their dicks. Like, it's like, whoa, that's crazy. I think these people can rest their fucking balls and dick on your forehead, essentially. And then,

like, that's, that's a crazy. Madness. If someone, first of all, any creature that to me must be a fucking, that's terrifying.

That's a siren. Well, I do want to say that's something all the time, too, because it's like, okay, they're tall, but like, you can't,

that's not, that's not something they did, you know what I mean? That's like, there's still, there's still, there's still, like,

even the worst player in NBA Yeah, you're still unbelievably skilled to another person. You know, like it's a skill. It's a hard work. It's a hard work thing to get to that level. Yeah, you got to work hard. It's like, it's a lot that goes into it. And I can understand why it could be, because, you know, I've fucking read comics and played

video games like that. So that I fuck the perception of things, you know. I've seen a guy jump in the space, you know, and it's like that's, that's stupid. In comparison to most, and compared to most of the things that you can watch for entertainment, I find sports incredibly mundane. I guess is how I would understand how you can put it something like that just because it's like it's you have no connection to it

you know you're just like whatever because more like people like physical like attributes stuff like that I understand like they don't really do anything for you well I just even the even the stuff that I can relate to or the stuff that I've done like I've played baseball it's like and I've seen I've watched baseball games I understand it but it's like all right and even even boxing

I was watching a lot of boxing when I was doing the training and I was like okay I was studying it but like I was looking at it. I was like, yeah, okay, I know how to do that. I get it. Like, I don't know. It becomes really demystifying when you play it, I guess. You can do it to the best of your ability, though, but there's obviously these people that can like...

But I can also like extrapolate it, like I can see what's happening. Because I understand it's like, oh, I know what that's like. And it's almost like the opposite of what you're feeling. Whereas like, you're more interested in it because you've played it or you've experienced it. I'm actually less. I think the things I'm interested in the most are the things that I have no hope of doing. Yeah, well, obviously things that are the most whimsical and unbelievable the things that would draw your attention.

Right. You'd be like, wow, this guy's playing seven guitars with his toes and dick. And it's like, you know, that's going to be like, well, that's impressive. That's amazing. Well, that's another thing, too. It's like, even just guitar. Like, there's, like, stuff that people do on guitar that I'm, like, baffled by. And I genuinely, even for as long as I've been playing, I'll watch people like play.

And I'm like, I genuinely, I can't fathom how you're doing this. See, that's the, that's weird because it's literally the exact same thing. Actually. It's just time. It's like. It's not just time. It's more... It's more than just time.

It's time. No, it's time. It's time. It's time. It's time. It is more than just time. And there's some natural ability, some maybe... No, when it comes to playing and understanding music theory, it's just time. That is not a...

There is no barrier or entry. Unless you don't have fucking hands, then you're fucked in the same way. Well, my pinky is fucked. So like my pinky is... You can train your pinky. No, no, it's literally like, I've... I've heard every fucking... Dude, I've...

Literally just... What do you? I'm telling you. I've seen people. not be able to, this is a thing. You've seen Ricky Burrick shred? I've seen like, your,

Donovan? Your pinky is not Donovan or Ricky. You're watching your pinky move right now is not Ricky Burke or fucking Donovan. Chris digs it to his pinky and it's a necrophied. There is nothing wrong with your pinky. I don't know what the fuck you're talking about. That's the,

I can't. Oh, so it's a little like, oh, no. That's all like, that's the only motion that I have. That's, I'm see, I've seen. There's no in between. I've literally just saw you moving it in other ways. What?

You can't do this? What are you doing? You don't have like complete locomotion of your pinky? Not this one. That's pretty crazy. Yeah. And that's like the important one to fucking have. It's actually,

I've seen people without pinkies play incredibly well. Oh yeah. It's all about it's. No, it's about improvisation. It's about like the thing it's about it's about the reason why I'm a dog shit guitarist I've been playing since I was like, uh,

14 or something because I just don't put in the time. I just don't care. I'd assume because for, because you know every, because whenever it comes to skill of things, right? Our ability to do something, right? You'd assume that there's obviously, there's practice,

which is obviously the most important thing, right? Like, I learned how to play piano, and I never went back into it because I never practiced anymore. To the point that I got very bad at it, right? It's the same thing that with guitar. I picked up guitar. I learned how to play the chords, and I stopped.

Yeah. Because I was like, I'm lazy. Yeah. And I feel like some people have a gift, right? But I think that gift for that isn't extraordinary. Like, someone can still learn how to play. It makes it easier. This is the old, to me, it's like, say, for example,

for example, there are people. there are people who can draw off a memory that have a talent. Hello, hello, I'm Malcolm Gladwell, host of the podcast Smart Talks with IBM. I recently sat down with IBM's chairman and CEO, Arvin Krishna. And I asked him, how can companies use AI to its fullest potential to create smarter business? My one advice to that, pick areas you can scale. Don't pick the shiny little toys on the side. For example, if anybody has more than 10% of what they had for customer service 10 years ago,

they're already five years behind. If anybody is not using AI to make their developers who write software 30% more productive today, with the goal of being 70% more productive. Yeah. So we are not asking our clients to be the first experiment on. We say you can leverage what we did. We're happy to bring out all our learnings, including what needs to change in the process,

because the biggest change is not technology, is getting people to accept that there's a different way to do things. To listen to the full conversation, visit IBM.com slash smart talks. All right, quick quiz for the hiring managers out there. What's worse? Being understaffed or being poorly staffed? Well, that's a trick question,

because both are recipes for chaos. Either way, just say to yourself, this is a job for Indeed's sponsored jobs. You'll get matched with candidates that meet the skills, certifications, and everything else you're looking for. Or go a different way and get no traction. Seriously, sponsored directly on Indeed are 95% more likely to report a hire than non-sponsored jobs. It really is a no-brainer. Spend less time searching and more time actually interviewing candidates who check all your boxes. Less stress, less time, more results.

When you need the right person to cut through the chaos, this is a job for Indeed sponsored jobs. And listeners of this show will get a $75 sponsored job credit to help your job get the premium status it deserves at Indeed.com slash podcast. Just go to Indeed.com slash podcast right now. Indeed.com slash podcast. Terms and conditions apply. Need to hire? This is a job for Indeed sponsored jobs. And then there's people who would have to grind to ever be able to do that. There's like a difference. Someone who just has that natural ability, I fucking don't have that at all. Like if you told me to draw a horse right now, it would look like a demon. Because I just can't do it.

I can't. Like, I'll draw a horse and it won't look like a horse. I really, at this very moment, at the moment in which that I'm speaking to you guys right now, I don't know what a horse looks like. You're lying. Why are you lying? Like somehow. So upset. You went through Red Dead 2 and somehow missed all the horses.

No, no, no, no. No, no. No, no. You forgot. They're gone. They're gone. They're gone. Seriously, no, no, I remember horses, but I can't, I cannot describe a horse to you.

You're literally making me so fucking. That's great, because I, can you draw, can you draw a horse? I can't draw anything. But that's what I'm saying. I can't draw a circle with eyes right. I'm a horrible. That's crazy. I'm terrible.

Can you draw, I can, this is my, here's my thing. I've drawn Hey Arnold so much. I can draw Hay Arnold from memory. But see, that was from, that's the difference between me is. I call him, Hey Arnold. I can draw It's not the same character We think of

No this is Hey Arnold That's Arnold That's Arnold short man Or whatever his name is chronically And this is Hey Arnold That's his alter ego Is Hay Arnold

I had to say that Because if I said Arnold You would be like What the fuck are you talking about? I just think it's funny That his name is like You could have Word it better

But like every person Is gonna understand What you mean by Joe's walking by Hey hey Arnold And it's a different He looks like He looks like

He looks like Fucking Blue from Blues Clues a different character entirely. And Arnold's like, what the fuck is that? That's hey Arnold, Arnold. And you're Arnold. It's fucking stupid.

Invader Zim is for me. I could do that from memory now. Right. And like various like poses and positions. God, I wish I had that. I wish I had that. That's the one thing because I've always admired being, you can make a ton of money being a tattoo artist, right?

That's always something that I've always admired that like one of my friends who's just a genius when it comes to that. And like I have an advantage with, with, you know, they call it perfect pitch. I wouldn't say mine's perfect. But because like perfect pitch is like Beethoven writing an entire, you know, symphony or something. Just in his head. I can do almost like, like I write most of my music in my head. And then I have to complete it on the guitar just to make sure that everything translated well.

Sometimes my mind will make things like unnatural scale progressions. But mostly I can write. I had an entire, like most of a song of my head. So I'll be driving. A lot of times when I'd be commuting, I would write a lot of my music were on the toilet. And so like,

I wasn't blessed any of that. I can make friends good. That's all I'm good. I can make friends good. And I'm like, like I. You're tall and you have big peepee. That's, that's all. That's all I got going from.

That's really, that's really nothing. A lot of people. That can take you very far. It's taken me pretty far. But still, that's nothing. There's nothing there with that. I am a short black man with, average p or something.

I haven't, maybe above average, but I haven't, I have not, I have not met, look, I'm, I'm be honest,

I haven't measured since probably, like, middle school because I don't want to be, like, disappointed. I'll be like, you, I don't think it shrank or something?

I don't think it, but I just feel like, I'm so much bigger now than I am. Yeah, that you don't want to find out. Yeah, I just,

you just, I just, I, I know it looks fine. I've been told many of times, and I would still be like, oh, bitch, you better not be lying to me. But,

I'm pretty sure I would say because I think average is like five inches-ish and I think I'm above that. The thing about I think though, I literally don't know. For me, it's just that like if I knew how to draw knowing how my imagination's out of control

I would have stopped eating, I would have died. I would have died off. I would have just drew everything. I would have drawn, drew whole stories and then tried to put them together in my mind.

You'd be like those Korean dudes playing like fucking Starcraft. And then just died. Yeah, 100%. He's just died. he's gay dutch did you just draw Arnold he's gay

dude I can't draw I can't draw anything dude that's like the only character though I am were you naturally able to do that or you had to practice it

well I had to practice right and see that's you can do it too you just have to practice it I I can well yes if you draw

I know I know I can because I was with Lily's cousins and they were like you can't they had a piano right what did you fucking create It's just a hit to the dig. That's so good.

That's so good. That's such a fuck. I look like a monster. You look fucking disgusting. What was the new one? Because we have a new one of you, right? That one is fucking, I love that. With my teeth, I look like I have a mall.

My teeth look round. That shit looks awesome. That looks like some new horror film shit. Like, I like it. Maybe you'll be in the new Silent Hill or something. Me? I would be so upset if I'm in it. I'm like, you guys didn't tell me any.

You didn't even say anything to me. You didn't even want money. It's not about the money. No one. said anything. That was like that fucking asshole that, uh, that drew me, rest in peace. Like that way, we just like, I need it. I need an idea.

And then cool. He looked up some black guy. That's the thing that I don't. I really do think that's the story. That is what's so incredible to me that. That he must have put in those actual words. Because I think if he just put in black guy on Google, I don't think I pop up. At that time, maybe.

At that time, maybe. It's possible. It may be, but then I feel like also, okay, maybe after a lot of scrolling, because I feel like the first thing is going to be those diable black guy. It probably would be like a getting, like a smiling. Yeah, like this black. Like Marlon Wayans. Yeah, yeah. Smiling.

That's why I feel like it would be that. And so I just, I can't fucking believe that. I saw that picture the other day and it still blows my mind. Like a dyed black guy. Like a black kind of died. It's still kind of more. I fucking hate it. I hate that it's a little morbid to me.

But thank God it didn't say like, you know, rip Derek. because then I would be really scared. I'd be really fucking scared. That would be genuinely terrifying. I'd actually be really upsetting. You get a post of you from the future and it says when you die and you're like, fuck, how!

Helping, how? That is, I love that. I love that. I can't fucking believe that. It's, what are the odds? It's because you're, you are an indescribable, very simple adjective,

black guy. So when he looked up black guy, you probably were probably the most searched black guy at that. Maybe. When you were just using those words. I guess so. It's just, I just feel like, I'm just thinking of it from a logical perspective that there are so many prominent black people you can use to really even kind of get gear point across. But they're prominent. That's the thing.

People are like, I know that guy. That's Marlon Wayne. He's not dead. I know that. Chadwick Boseman didn't die yet. That can't be. But like, say, what if he did like, like, what if he did like, really? rest in peace two because it was it was a demo it wasn't even sold that was a demo he had demo things

of like what he could do and that was a demo and so the guy um i asked the guy to buy the demo for me and he shipped it to me but the thing is i feel like a rest and peace teupac would be a better demo not some random fucking black guy i don't know man it just seems so i was like what the how did this happened the guy didn't know who the fuck i was he didn't know and that's what i was like yeah rip marcus right yeah and and the weird thing is i can't believe how much so somebody made that graphic T for me? Hello, hello. I'm Malcolm Gladwell, host of Smart Talks with IBM. I recently spoke with IBM's new director of research, Jake Mbata.

We discussed his vision for the future of quantum computing. At IBM research, what we always do is answer what is the future of computing, whether it's coming up with new algorithms, coming up with better AI, coming up with quantum, or coming up with just how do different accelerators go together. It's our DNA to answer the question of what is the future. Isn't it a perfect problem for IBM because you kind of need to have a legacy of building stuff? Yes. Building actual physical machines.

Yeah, it's why I came to IBM. I wanted the experience, the culture of building hard things that others have not done before. Where do you imagine we are in the timeline of this technology? There will come a point when it will mature. Right? My cell phone is a mature technology at this point. How far are we from that point with Quantum? By 2029, we'll build the first fault-tolerant quantum computer.

That is one that can run a very, very large, large problem. To learn how IBM is building the future of computing, visit IBM.com slash quantum. All right, quick quiz for the hiring managers out there. What's worse? staffed or being poorly staffed? Well, that's a trick question, because both are recipes for chaos. Either way, just say to yourself, this is a job for Indeed's sponsored jobs. You'll get matched with candidates that meet the skills, certifications, and everything else you're looking for, or go a different way and get no traction. Seriously, sponsored jobs posted directly on Indeed are 95% more likely to

report a hire than non-sponsored jobs. It really is a no-brainer. Spend less time searching and more time interviewing candidates who check all your boxes. Less stress, less time, more results. When you need the right person to cut through the chaos, this is a job for Indeed sponsored jobs. And listeners of this show will get a $75 sponsored job credit to help your job get the premium status it deserves at Indeed.com slash podcast. Just go to Indeed.com slash podcast right now. Indeed.com slash podcast. Terms and conditions apply. Need to hire? This is a job for indeed sponsored jobs. And it sold a lot. And it also made me feel weird. Then I'm like, why do you guys want this so badly? Because they like it on you're dead. Especially at that time, the motherfuckers you were

drawn in by mistake. They were probably happiest. We got one less. He got one. He was a warrior for us, but we lost him. We lost him. God damn. Damn. Damn. The damn laugh. The damn laugh. got him. The liberals killed the only good one. The only good one. Did you, you know what's fucking, so I want to bring this up because I'm fascinated by this,

by this instinct that Sweeney has, where you will get close to the mic to scream, but then speak away from it. That's amazing. I am truly baffled by that. That's amazing. It's my homophobia.

I feel like this is a dick. So I'm young at to get it away from me. But then I back up and I talk. It's very great. If we make it a different, if we make it a different color, would that help? It's like a big black, if it's a white one, I'd be, it'd be even worse. Suck it. The whole thing.

Stop. I suck the whole thing. That is crazy. They go to the table. That is crazy that you go all the way to the fucking end of the arm. And you do it. It's, what the hell did you do? Sorry, your brain simulated it.

And you're throwing closed because you're so scared. I literally imagined it. It made me gag. Like, just like something just shoving something down your throat that hard. That's crazy. I have a horrible gag. I could never suck penis, dude. Like, I guess.

Just beyond the further reaches of my tongue, I start gagging. Like just the back of my tongue. We have to gagging. We have the train. We have the train. I don't need the train. We have the train, dude. I don't.

When am I going to have to suck dick? you never it's just a good it's a good thing to have because look there can be an apocalypse something can happen and then now the currency is meaningless right fiat currency is gone now currency is probably sucking dick uh like sexual favors you know what I mean and then if you can't suck dick you'll probably get your head blown off because it'll be like you know like you're you're going to exchange like weapons or something for for dick sucking and then they're like you you're grinding your your teeth on my pee and then they just shoot you in the face. I am going to absolutely

get weapons then. I will take weapons off people. Well, someone's like firing a gun, I'd run up behind them and I'll just bite their jugular out and I'll just take their gun. All right. Should we should we move on to some questions? Even the zombies will be scared. They're like, whoa, he's eating him. It's like an hour and five or something. Okay, cool. It's weird

not seeing it. Yeah, it is strange. Yeah, I have to keep looking over while you guys are talking sometimes. All right. But, uh, what the fuck? Balls with the balls Da bang Biggie Biggie balls

Niggie niggie Rode it wrote in Hello dexterity Strength and Luck Hmm Am I luck Your strength I think I would

What This man This guy's lucky as fuck Oh he's lucky as shit Okay he is lucky as shit Okay I guess I'm strengthened Yeah that's because that's all like Performative strength

Okay I can I'm pretty strong I can pick you up probably and crumple you If you did Did, Chris, if you picked me up and you crumbled me first and foremost, you're getting put in the facility. Derek's going to run away. If he's going to run away and be like, oh, this guy's a monster. Do you know how much you can bench?

I get benched. My highest ever was like 315. Yes, same. Who's that about it? I would be so mad because that's more than I've, uh, because I, I, I, I've fucked up my wrist, so I can't get to 350. I actually don't know how much I bench. I think I knew at one point.

Have you done it recently? That was a while ago. That's back when I was still like, we should, we should do what. We should do PRs. We should go to the gym and do PR to see where we're at. Right now, it'd be embarrassed. It'd probably be like $2.15 maybe. That's not that bad.

Yes, I'll go to the gym. Where do you go? There's a gym right across the house. Oh, you have one across the street? Yeah. What the hell is that? It's like a local small thing. I'm not, you don't need to say it, but it's like a smaller one.

You know, you know, I'm a, you know right across street where the, the, the supermarket is. And then right across from there, there's a gym in there by like the furthest end. So I go there. That's pretty convenient. It's like, it's like a, like a smaller thing. It's not like a big chain. I do like kettlebell shit at my house. I see.

And then I go there for like cardio. It's like like that. I've been thinking to going into the gym again. Yeah, I actually, my body needs it. I'm probably going to go to, I'm probably going to crunching. I've,

I've, in the past month or something, I've, I've been food maxing. It's crazy. You mean just eating? It's, I've been,

you know, I've been, I've been sleep maxing and a massing too. I'm getting pretty good PR. I've been eating ways I don't eat anymore. Like I, I've like fucking...

I've been anti-semitism matching. Yeah, that's a good one. It feels good to do that. I'm just kidding. We got a question from... Don't worry about. No worries with the balls. Bals with the balls.

You've been hit with the curse of death. The only way to avoid your fate is to give up one of two things that get a race forever with no trace or ability to recreate or bring back. All video games or all music. What do you choose? Video games.

Yes, that means... There will be no music anywhere literally. Yeah, video games is. obviously. I love video games, but like 50% of the enjoyment of that is the music from it. Like, and so I can't even imagine like Doom. Like, Doom would be useless without that

soundtrack at all. Like, so I would... It would feel a lot less. Yeah. Almost every, like Final Fantasy 7 without that soundtrack, fucking Street Fighter. Like, there's... I'm going... Pretty much every single video game is enhanced by the music that is in it. And so because of, like, I think I could easily like, listen. That would

suck to never play video games again. But music's too, like, That's too all-encompassing. No, you're right. Because that means no movies. You're right. I want to go deeper than that, right? Human culture.

Music is very important as, like, beings. Imagine no Spanish music. No African rainbow. Like, I feel like we wouldn't have made it. Somebody would have just killed them out. The first man would have been like, yeah, I'm done. Rock to the head. Imagine never hearing Nightcore again.

Oh, my God. A hundred geeks, no 100 gecks. What would I do? How will I stem? If somebody started like making a drum beat on their on their thighs Would it just not make that noise? Yeah, it wouldn't It would be damping?

Would there still be rhythm though? Would there still be rhythm? No, rhythm's impossible Rhythm is impossible. There's no way. Like if you start like every You can't hum? I guess you can dance but

They would have never been invented If anyone started making any type of sequential Sequential beat with their like feet or something It would immediately just get dampened. There's no sequence of sound I feel like that would be Humanity's greatest to try to understand

because imagine it would be like we'd stop our feet we'd walk we'd make sounds but then as soon as there's a rhythm to it it'd be nothing and you'd be like wait why why is that it would be legalized there would be no

you probably couldn't even know that that marching sound like yeah probably could even do that because there's like a little rhythm to that you wouldn't know when your army is approaching like it would be it'd be bad

people to have sing songy names would just have no names yeah what is the sing songy name what are you talking about Some people have sing-songy names, you know? What does that mean? That sort of have like a song-esque nature to them.

What the fuck you're talking about? You never heard of a sing-songy word or sing-songy phrase? Like, give me an example. Please, I'm begging for an example. I can't think of one because I don't know any exactly, but people- Like Italian names? Maybe, I guess. Like, if that's sing-songy, like, like, songs, names almost have like a rhythm to saying them.

I don't know any names like that, but I know they exist. I know they exist. Do you know what he's talking about? I was just trying to like sing-songy phrases and like names. I was just trying to like like, you know, you know, you know when you say yeah and you don't know what the fuck's talking about? Just to get it over with it. Just just there's sing-songy, I'm not crazy. You're not doing a good job of explaining this.

I got to look up sing-songy names. Wait, go continue. Go ahead. Look up sing-songy names and tell me what should. Yeah. What the fuck pops up. Oh, that's what I was like. Like Wetzels pretzels?

Yeah, yeah. I don't know. I don't know. There wouldn't be any rhymes either. There wouldn't be any nursery arrives. You would have to just talk your baby to sleep. Oh, yeah, yelled them. Got to sleep.

Fucking go to bed. Fucking sleep. Fuck you. Shake him a little bit. You fucking, there'd be a lot more baby shaking. But shake him not in a rhythm. Yeah, you can't. Nope,

it has to be like, have you found any examples of this fictional concept? Well, there's sing song. Sing songy names. I really don't. don't know what you're talking about. No. A verse or a piece of a verse that is...

Oh, God. You're reading the AI generated shit, aren't you? It's not going to happen, dude. Montynous, rhythmical, concadence, or a tone or sound. You just described it again. Give me an example. I don't know examples. I know they exist.

I've heard this phrase. I don't know any right now. I know they're real. Are you talking about, like... Derek, help. I know you've... Hold, hold, let me see. Did I get this right?

Is it like those like nursery rhymes or it's like Peter Piper? No, those are more like, um, I don't know what you're talking about that. Because you know, Spider-Man's name is what, I forgot what the word is called. They're called on when something and something has two to the same line. Yeah, I know what you're talking about. Peter Piper. Isn't that called an, uh, uh, fuck. Peter Piper picked a pickled penis.

And, uh, oh my God. Ill, I'll, it'll, it'll, fuck. The Iliad. Idiom. No, not idiom. It's a, no. What did you say? What did you say?

I said the Iliad. I appreciate that's like a fucking novel or something like that. I can't believe. No, it's called like a, in a loose, in a loop. Oh my God. Alliteration. I'm getting alliteration.

Is that, is it? Yeah. Where the first letter in the next thing, everything is like, it's like saying Peter piped. I already, I already lost. I already lost. I couldn't think of. I couldn't think of an adjective.

I already lost. Peter Pipeed. I love this. Perfusely. Yeah. Peter Pipe profusely. Peter is hard to do. I get it.

I get it. I know you're trying. Pounded a pretty pussy. There you go. Yeah. That was terrible, but you think you were finishing it. That's not yours. Yeah.

I said, Peter Piper. I said thank you for finishing it. It's still bad, but thank you. Some hostility here. I have no clue what the fuck you're talking about. Of course, we're going to move on. That's why we, I didn't want to entertain it.

We're going to move on. I was just, I just went, yeah. I wanted to see like it. You were scared and you wanted to be done. I wanted to see if I could get you to the place, but like, we couldn't do it. Peter Pipe. If anybody, if anybody, if anybody, if anybody at home has any fucking idea what he's talking about. They're real thing.

They don't. They don't. Because I was thinking like, like, like a sing-songy. I was thinking like how like certain languages are kind of sing-songy, like how Italian is kind of like sing-songy. It's like, bitt-bidi-b-b-b-b-b-b-bo-b-bo. Yeah, something like that. Okay. Great.

So when I said Italian names, I was right. No, I'm just trying to sound right because I'm scared. I don't know what I don't know if I have any. Big ugly Jordan wrote in. It says, hello, Raff, lust and sloth. Hmm. Huh. I'm luss.

I guess I'm lus. Yeah, I guess I'm sloth. You lazy, bitch. Am I not lazy? I do some all the time. My sloth because people say, like, I don't make enough videos. Is that what it is? Oh, maybe.

Or you're lust. Maybe. Oh, maybe. Yeah, are you lust? No. I'm all of these. You always coming all over the place and shit. I'm all of these.

This is all just to me, actually. I'm going to do. I'm gonna get a black light in this fucking place. Do not do that. That's gross. That's gross. I just never checked this room. And so like I don't want to know.

I don't. I think a black light is just unnecessary. I actually have a black light in the closet. Oh, you do? Yeah. Yeah, I wouldn't see, I wouldn't want to know either. Like I moved in this new apartment. I wouldn't want to know if I checked it.

Yeah. It just come all over the walls. The way that I figure, the way that I figure it is like, you know what? It's almost like I'll, it's. It's good for my immune system. Hello, hello. I'm Malcolm Gladwell, host of Smart Talks with IBM. I recently spoke with IBM's new director of research, Jake Mbata.

We discussed his vision for the future of quantum computing. At IBM research, what we always do is answer what is the future of computing. Whether it's coming up with new algorithms, coming up with better AI, coming up with quantum, or coming up with just how do different accelerators go together. It's our DNA to answer the question of what is the future. Isn't it a perfect problem for IBM because you kind of need to have a legacy of building stuff? Yes. Building actual physical machines.

Yeah, it's why I came to IBM. I wanted the experience, the culture of building hard things that others have not done before. Where do you imagine we are in the timeline of this technology? There will come a point where, when it will mature. Right? Yeah. My cell phone is a mature technology at this point.

How far are we from that point with quantum? By 2029, we'll build the first fault-tolerant quantum computer. That is one that can run a very, very large, large problem. To learn how IBM is building the future of computing, visit IBM.com slash quantum. All right, quick quiz for the hiring managers out there. What's worse? Being understaffed or being poorly staffed? Well, that's a trick question, because both are recipes for chaos.

Either way, just say to yourself, this is a job for Indeed's sponsored jobs. You'll get matched with candidates that meet the skills, certifications, and everything else you're looking for. Or go a different way and get no traction. Seriously, sponsored jobs posted directly on Indeed are 95% more likely to report a hire than non-sponsored jobs. It really is a no-brainer. Spend less time searching and more time actually interviewing candidates who check all your boxes. less stress, less time, more results. When you need the right person to cut through the chaos,

this is a job for Indeed sponsored jobs. And listeners of this show will get a $75-sponsored job credit to help your job get the premium status it deserves at Indeed.com slash podcast. Just go to Indeed.com slash podcast right now. Indeed.com slash podcast. Terms and conditions apply. Need to hire? This is a job for Indeed sponsored jobs.

Maybe. Maybe. Maybe, I guess. Wives' tail, I guess. Cool. So I'd rather sing-song. Anyway, he says, in spirit of Pride Month, what's the gayest thing you've ever done? For me, it'd probably be having sex with men.

Not exclusively men, but men make up the lion's share. I love that he says, lion's share. That's some fucking game of poems and statement, dog. You could have said majority. Most of them have been. The lion's share. So he's a good idiom. Yeah, so he's max by.

That's Matt, yeah, he's by maxing. He's gay, he's gay maxing. He's gay maxing. I've definitely kissed guys, but that's about it. But never like intimate kiss. I've kissed men on like, like your ex. Oh, sure. I've pecked the guy before.

But I've never like family? Outside of family? Yeah. Why? I think I've ever done that. I don't think I thought I was gay at the moment. I think I just. Sometimes it is a job.

I've seen people do that as like a joke. I've seen it. I wasn't joking though, Billy. In comedy scenarios, I have seen that for sure. It's like a, see, it was like, it was like a Crowder where he, if he did it one time with his co-host, it would have been like, I get the joke. You guys are being extreme. Like they went to that women's march and he's like an address or some shit. But they kissed like, like, oh, that, you're gay.

The payoff is one time. The other nine times or whatever. It's not funny anymore. Because I would have kissed a lot. Now you're just dating. Now you're dating. You're just kissing another guy. And that's fine.

Like admit it. Like, stop hiding. Admit it to yourself first. 100%. I'm trying to think what's the, um, I had a,

I had a gay friend when, but we didn't realize, because we were in elementary school, we didn't know what gay was just yet. We like had sex, but we do. Yeah. No,

but this guy was, you don't know what straight is. He was like sexually maturing more than we were, like way fashion than we were. So I think this guy was like, big balls. Yeah, he had to, he had the, this dude had like a nine incher. We're like 10 years old.

He had nine inch balls. Each ball was at length nine inches. Dude, they're like popsicles. It's like his balls are just crazy. Like your balls so long, they're long but not round at all. They're oval. That's crazy. His balls look like that.

No, but I was saying I was around, I was around my friend that I think was, becoming sexually mature. Right. And like trying to like he was, this dude like liked being like, oh, I'm flashing and stuff and like, ha ha. And like we thought it was funny, but I'm realizing as I got older, I'm like, oh, that dude,

because he's gay as shit now. He lives in West Hollywood. He's a, he's a gym, a trainer. He had a, he had another, you know, boyfriend with the same name and all this stuff. So I was like, oh, you grew up in your life. I don't like that. I don't like that either. That part makes me. You know, that was the first thing.

Okay, okay. I don't like, I was dating the Syrian girl at the time. This was like, was her name Derek. Yeah. Can you imagine? Her name was Derek? There's no way. There's no, there's certain names that are always off limits.

Like, I would never date anyone who has my mom's name. Like, I don't care how fucking, like, there's just no, it's just not going to work. I can't. I don't care how cool you are. I don't know my mom. So like, that's a weird thing, but like my grandma, absolutely not. Yeah, exactly. Like that, like, even my sister's, like, even my step sister's name would be fucking weird.

Like, it would be weird. be like, ah, I'm sorry, you can be the coolest girl in the fucking world, not going to happen. So there's certain things that are just totally off-limits. No one of my family has really, really, like, except my grandma. No one has really common names. Yeah, all they're like, they're all like spaghetti. What's your grandma's name? What's her middle name, last name and social security number?

Middle name is, I don't remember. Last name is, I don't know, nigger. That is a crazy last thing. Marty, nigger. Yeah, I, uh, I don't know. I don't know, man. I don't. Yeah, I, I, I kissed the guy once, but, like, other than that, it was, like, nothing, really.

But I was younger. I wasn't, like, I wasn't even a teenager. I was a younger guy. Oh, no, I kissed the mean once. There you go. Did you really? Yeah, just to make Lily mad. That's funny.

Mm. Yeah, I don't have any memories of me macking on a dude. Like, I don't, not that I'm willing to ridden. Well, not willing to admit at least. Nah, nah, I'm not going to say those. I wouldn't bother me. I would like, it just, it's never even for a joke. I think that people that get mad at gayness, I will be a super gay around.

Yeah, that's so funny. That's funny. I love that. Like, making them uncomfortable is great. I've been to more musicals. That I probably should have been. That means we've been to. I've been to quite a few.

I like musicals, actually. Oh. But, like, that's probably it. That's probably the furthest. I think, like, what's the gay thing? I'm sure there's something that gets. It's probably just has to. the the the the the the the parodies that I've done throughout the years it has to be gay it has to be

fair that is probably like the that is objectively the answer I guess technically singing any on any of those is probably the answer that is very true that because there are some people that and I relish it I relish it I relish the people that are like oh you're you're you're you're in the closet aren't you and I'm like I wish I mean your closet I respond every time I see something like I'm like I wish dude like you you have no idea how and I'm sure we've talked about this plenty of times is just being a gay man and hanging out with your boys and fucking and sucking like that seems like so much better imagine fucking your boy right and then getting up like you want to run some street fighter and then you go do that that sounds amazing that sounds

you don't have to deal with all this maybe the fucking the frames and the wood like oh the picture it's oh the paid oh the silverware the china I'm like shut the fuck up honey the reef is crooked it's a circle bitch I just want to high five my bros, we say we won v1, some street fighter, right, and then we fuck each other a little bit and then we go back to it. That sounds so, it's funny how amazing. It's funny how like often

great gay couples look, but then like lesbian couples. Like, abuse. Let's move on. Let's move on. It's like, I got to, I'll back it up by saying, I've been going to WMBA games since the 90s. Oh, man. Jesus Christ. Let's move.

Some of the, the, the, the, the, the, lot of lesbians there. and I was like, I was like, damn, they're saying like the porn at all. I was like, damn. I like him like that, in fact. You like him like that, yeah. I like him to look like,

Drew Carey. Happy bride, mom. I like that. I want to break them. I want to break them down. All right, one sock, one shoe, one sock, one shoe rod in. It says, howl, by the way, do you know what that is? One sock, one shoe, one shoe.

So Colin recently, uh, on. sacred symbols explain to me that he how do you put on your socks and your shoes? Like what's the order that you go in? So, well, if usually left to right since I'm left handed but I do socks, left sock, right sock, right? And then I put on my left shoe right shoe.

Right, so Colin does he does sock shoe and then sock shoe. That's so composterous, dude. That is, what? What? How did you learn that? Because somebody asked that question. Do you not feel, like, does he not feel uncomfortable standing up with one shoe on?

Like, what if he has to run out the house? Well, how he explained it to me. That is so funny. It was a terrible explanation. But he was saying, like, Hello, hello. I'm Malcolm Gladwell, host of Smart Talks with IBM. I recently spoke with IBM's new director of research, Jake Embatta.

We discussed his vision for the future of quantum computing. At IBM research, what we always do, is answer, what is the future of computing? Whether it's coming up with new algorithms, coming up with better AI, coming up with quantum, or coming up with just how do different accelerators go together. It's our DNA to answer the question of what is the future.

Isn't it a perfect problem for IBM because you kind of need to have a legacy of building stuff? Yes. Building actual physical machines. Yeah, it's why I came to IBM. I wanted the experience, the culture of building hard things that others have not done before. Where do you imagine we are in the timeline of this technology?

There will come a point when it will mature. My cell phone is a mature technology at this point. How far are we from that point with Conton? By 2029, we'll build the first fault-tolerant quantum computer. That is one that can run a very, very large, large problem. To learn how IBM is building the future of computing, visit IBM.com slash quantum. All right, quick quiz for the hiring managers out there. What's worse?

Being understaffed or being poorly staffed? Well, that's a trick question, because both are recipes for chaos. Either way, just say to yourself, this is a job for indeed sponsored jobs. You'll get matched with candidates that meet the skills, certifications, and everything else you're looking for. Or go a different way and get no, action. Seriously, sponsored jobs posted directly on Indeed are 95% more likely to report a higher than non-sponsored jobs. It really is a no-brainer. Spend less time searching and more time actually interviewing candidates who check all your boxes. Less stress, less time, more

results. When you need the right person to cut through the chaos, this is a job for Indeed sponsored jobs. And listeners of this show will get a $75 sponsored job credit to help your job get the premium status it deserves at Indeed.com slash podcast. Just go to Indeed.com slash podcast right now. Indeed.com slash podcast. Terms and conditions apply. Need to hire? This is a job for Indeed's sponsored jobs.

Would you, if you were caught in a situation, in a bad situation, you had to get the fuck out. Would you rather have just socks or at least one shoe? No, I'd actually rather just have socks. The socks. Yeah. I can actually, I can, having, you in fact,

I'm too unbalanced with one shoe. I don't even know if I'm explained. His explanation was very confusing. Well, that's why you run fast. If you have socks on you, you run faster. Like,

the less you have on your feet, because if you have bare feet, you run faster. It's like a thing. What the hell are you talking about? Because you feel the earth directly under your feet. People run faster in bare feet.

Who told you this? How would they not? Versus shoes? Yeah. Look, in like a perfectly comfortable environment, I guess, but like over like, over like what.

Yes. Yes. In that context 100%. I'm picturing. I'm picturing us living in civilization. Yeah. You're not going to run. Like if you're on a track,

like if you're on like a track actually, somebody would very likely run faster they would if they had shoes on. The only reason I don't know about that is because you would think the Olympians and the people at the highest level would not run without shoot. They would run without shoes then. I think it's, they may, they may hurt themselves.

Here's why I don't think that's true. I think it's, you know, but hold on. Do you know how like, you know how like in rugby where they're not as armored, they tackle it. other harder because in football they're covered in armor so like they they hit

each other way harder because they think they're vulnerable yeah I think that applies to shoes as well when you're running because I feel like if you're if your feet you can feel the ground you're probably going to run slower than somebody who who has a complete barrier that isn't max when you have shoes on stop it am I right I feel like that makes sense that does make sense psychologically that makes a lot of sense actually like I've heard that before because I feel like people that have got tested with their shoes off and on.

There's different speeds. I mean, you might be right. I just, but I actually hissed the psychology in that. And it's like sometimes, yeah. I used to go to some. Or boxing with gloves. I was going to say exactly that. I used to go to some shady ass parties where I feel like I should bring my four ounce gloves.

Because like, there would always be fights breaking out. And I'm like, all right, just in case you have your gloves and you'll be fine. You imagine. Some dude walks in a part. That is, that is, that is, that is the kind of dude that walks into the party with the gun looking to start bullshit. I hate the, he comes there,

because that, the gun is so zero to 100. I hate that. That is how parties would be. I don't know. You've been to parties like that before, of course, because you,

because you unfortunately go to parties up where we rights go to school. I didn't party a lot at that time, but I've been to like, maybe like one or two. And that's what happened. Dude,

somebody comes there where to gun, he starts and you like, all right, this guy has a gun. I saw a guy with a bar once.

I was like, I'm leaving. I hate, I can't. Is that the time of the McDonald's time? McDonald's. When we got McDonald's afterwards, we were at like, we were at like, um, someplace in PK and then someone had a gun and we afterwards, we drove back.

No, that was at that club 52 or something or 82. Like, dude, I was there. I wasn't there that night, but I remember hearing about it. That is, dude, we went to a pub. We were all like 18. We shouldn't have been there first and foremost. Nice. We shouldn't have been there.

We all went. Some dude started shooting and I was still in the place. I was like, what's happening? And I heard gunshots and I was like, okay. and I literally got down and I commando crawled out the door and got the Joe's car. Dude, I can't, I, look, man,

guns in, in, in a video game setting or TV or they're cool as shit. They're epic. In real life, they suck. I hate them so much. Really? They're kind of cringe. I hate them, dude.

I want to, I'm, you know, as far as being like a troll and antagonist, I'm not into that shit online, but one thing that I will and love doing is if there's a gun nut, I love telling him the truth and like you're a fucking pussy. You're a pussy because you feel

insecure and you need to walk. I don't need to, I don't feel like I need anything to walk around and then just walk around it. You feel so scared. You have to have this fucking death machine on you. I don't know if they're like, because I walk around with pumpkin bombs.

Yeah, and you're a psychopath. See, that's just cool. No, no, no, no, he's a psychopath. No, but see, that's just cool. Like, it's the idea being like here. Godspeed, Spider-Man, and throwing that into a fucking room.

Like, what is wrong with it? It's the ones that turn people into skeletons, too. First and foremost, the fact that he had something that turned them. And that would have worked on, why didn't use that on Spider-Man? That would have worked on Spider-Man, too. No, no, because he's too spider-e and strong. Yeah, his spiders-to-spidery. He's like, resist!

Yeah, his skeleton would have been fine. Spiders can't turn into skeletons because they're already skeletons. Yeah, they got the exoskeletons, yeah, or something. They don't at all. They're actually very fleshy in comparison. But they're gay. That's all I know. You know what the spiders that are coming right?

Do you know about the gay spiders? The yellow hornet thing? Yeah, the yellow ones that are coming from China. They're popping over here and they're, they're, they fly actually. They fly now. They fly. They fly. They fly.

They don't fly. They ostensive. If you're, if you can glide but you're so light that the wind can carry you, you can basically, you can ostensibly fly. You can't control where you're going. Chris, do you know what you need to be able to fly? It's fine. Lightness.

No, you need wings. Wings are white things. Yeah. Explain helicopters. sir. You're right. You're right. You're right. Flying squirrels, flying fish. They can't actually fly, but we get it.

They glide. But we get it, though. But those are things that do fly without wings. That are not mechanical. Name an animal that flies without wings. My son out the window when he was born. Yeah, that is some extreme postpart depression. Like a football. Time.

It's not alive. But it's like a reverse riddle. I kind of want to hit you with like like a champagne bottle or something like you just The part of the podcast where Derek punches me in the brain until my head goes away and then like we play it seriously. We just we just don't we just don't cut away somebody with a champagne bottle till it breaks like you pound them until something goes wrong I and it shattered the idea I hate that like the visual of that like I like the movie visual of just shattering on impact yeah but not the actual think dude I love those those um those sugar glass bottles are so fucking Those are fucking funny. Do you remember we had like, we had like so many of them because I had them for like props and videos and stuff. Yeah. Well, yeah, because I would, I'd use the fair bit of them. I think I used all of them eventually. But there was like this weird tradition that we had that one VidCon where like people would come to the house and I would hit them over the head in the kitchen. There's so many of those videos that are gone now because I think they're on Twitter, other people's Twitter accounts. I have one of you doing it to Casara. Remember Casarra? Right. Yeah. But she told me she was like, she was like, she was like, that type of.

of hurt actually. She said it actually kind of hurt a little bit. Well, you're being hit with something. You're being hit with something. Yeah. It's not Did she die? Yeah. Right after that in fact. No, she actually dude. It was, you know, I'm just like, I got a wet spot. It was fucking sad. She actually she got doxed.

Oh, right, right, right. She got docks around the time because we used to do a streaming show and we actually even made merch for it too. And she got doxed and it was by something like actually we know the guy, I think. Oh, no, a legend. Alleged. She started dating some guy in the scene.

And then this guy's a fucking... This guy's a weirdo. I'll tell you off camera. And then allegedly he docksed her and then got like, and then she just stopped doing content. Apparently she's around again doing Twitch streaming low key and then like on TikTok

and stuff, but not like she wasn't. Because she was fucking talented. I found her by chance. And we're like, you see weird avatars on like Twitter and shit. Like you see there's sometimes you see a weird avatar. Yeah. She was that. She was so she was around so briefly for me. I don't even remember like was she doing like comedy or music stuff. She was doing commentary like so she was just good at like she was a good editor and actually she did a couple of things for me like I wasn't when I didn't

know a thing about motion tracking. I would ask her to do it for me. What's that? What's the next question? What's the next question? What's that? What's that? What's that? Oh yeah. I read this guy's name and we got off on a tangent. One sock, one shoe, one sock, one shoe wrote

and he says, hello from Australia, you gay, you're sexy cunts. Long time, first time. These two questions have been on my mind for the past three years. I must have an answer. Wow. Understand the weight of what I just said

and what he just wrote. He's had this question on his mind for the last three years. Yeah, that's what I was like, wow. His question is, is Sweeney gay? That's great. Imagine like really wondering. Like,

This is a very Pride Month themed episode. It is a very pride month. No, I am not an active homosexual. Yeah. Active. But we all retired. I'm a retired homosexual. We did go on a tangent that we would like that, though.

I wish I was gay to be easier, dude. I'd feel bad of breaking my wife's heart, right? And be like, hey, I don't like you anymore. I like penis, but I'd also feel free. You know what I mean? Because I'd be like, I just want to like, I don't know, man. I just feel like. What'd you do?

Would you do? What'd you do? I get you're a pussy away from me I like a penis now I would tell you like we can be roomies for a minute I don't know like if you want to sleep on the couch That's cool because I'm that you give her the couch I'm bringing her the couch still

I'm crazy I'm bringing grind I'm be grind I'm be like grind You gotta make a choice Either you I need I would rather be fucking dudes Loud and often in the living room Or in a bedroom Dude I would make a choice

That's a good point I would be yeah man I'd be roadie running up on dicks, man. It would be queers of war in that house. Clears of war. The idea, Lily would be so heartbroken. If she was like, you're gay, I'm like, yeah, I'm very gay, dude.

I'm leaving you today. In fact, you can keep all the shit. It's gay too. So it's just gayness in your house now. But like, bye. Yeah. She would. She would, but then she'd get over eventually.

Nah, she'd become homophob. That'd be it. That's funny. I like that. That's funny. I like that. over the top. She'd like, you know what? I'm embrace my Mexicanness. I hate gay. I hate gays

now. Binchie otto. You fucking otto, I hate you, Gulego. You fucking hoto, I hate you. And I'm like, Lily, that's not nice. Me and my boyfriend

don't want to hear that. We don't want to hear that. That's very rude to me. I got married to him immediately soon. She'd like, so you didn't marry me? You married this. I just found out of gay. We're getting married. I realized why I didn't marry you Because I was gay Yeld

Yo Yo it's coming together It's coming together She would be so upset Oh yeah she would definitely She might even do like a flip off a cliff man No she would probably just be like racist and gay All of these questions are gay

That's what's up Like literally every single like literally every single one Like here's one man Here's one from Uncle Remus This was on June 1st Uncle Remus constantly singing the N-word Ronan. He says, if you were forced to have gay sex with any cisgendered male fictional character, regardless of their consent. Rico, whoa!

You are usurper now, too. Who would you want it to be? Alicard. Alicard's fucking hot, yeah. Elocard is a good answer because he's so... He's like feminine-ish. So soft and stuff. He's into it, too, because he was like fucking...

Oh, yeah, Cloud. Cloud is pretty... Cloud looks pretty supple. I don't know. Cloud annoys me, but you don't have to listen to him. That's true. You're literally taking him at first. I'm going to tape him.

I'm going to tape his mouth shut. So that's good. Who else is another? Definitely, uh, Dominic Santiago. Hello, hello. I'm Malcolm Gladwell, host of the podcast Smart Talks with IBM. I recently sat down with IBM's chairman and CEO, Arvin Krishna. And I asked him, how can companies use AI to its fullest potential to create

smarter business. My one advice to them. Pick areas you can scale. Don't pick the shiny little toys on the side. For example. If anybody has more than 10% of what they had for customer service 10 years ago, they're already five years behind it. If anybody is not using AI to make their developers who write software 30% more productive

today with the goal of being 70% more productive. Yeah. Wow. So we are not asking our clients to be the first experiment on it. We say you can leverage what we did. We're happy to bring out all our learnings, including what needs to change in the process, because the biggest change is not technology, is getting people to accept that there's a different way to do things. To listen to the full conversation, visit IBM.com slash smart talks. All right.

quick quiz for the hiring managers out there. What's worse? Being understaffed or being poorly staffed? Well, that's a trick question, because both are recipes for chaos. Either way, just say to yourself, this is a job for Indeed's sponsored jobs. You'll get matched with candidates that meet the skills, certifications, and everything else you're looking for. Or go a different way and get no traction. Seriously, sponsored jobs posted directly on Indeed are 95% more likely to report a higher than non-sponsored jobs. It really is a no-brainer. Spend less time searching and more time actually interviewing candidates who check all your boxes. Less stress, less time, more results. When you need the right person to cut through the chaos, this is a job for Indeed's

sponsored jobs. And listeners of this show will get a $75 sponsored job credit to help your job get the premium status it deserves at Indeed.com slash podcast. Just go to Indeed.com slash podcast right now. Indeed.com slash podcast. Terms and conditions apply. Need to hire? This is a job for Indeed's sponsored jobs. Just to say, like, I'd fuck Coltrane to say I fuck Coltrane, you know? Dude, that is.

Woo! Yeah, yeah. I'm pretty sure he'd flip you around. No, you wouldn't. No, you wouldn't. My pelvic strict is wild. Oh, yeah? He'd be like, oh, what are you doing?

I'm pretty sure. Cole is probably as wide as this table. You know what he's like, he's like, honestly? If we could get, like, gears running on that. That'd be amazing It is having that that's the sound playing like the freaking The memories like sound Dude I would say I would love to play Gears of War

I would love to play in Queers a little more I can't I can't believe that collection is not kinda Like I know that they're pro it's eventually probably I think No but what is the what's the why is it not out My guess my guess is because this is a prequel they're gonna want to do that first and then maybe do the collection afterwards Since it would I I understand it on some level but at the same time it's like yo come on I just feel like that it hasn't been spoken about

The fact that it hasn't happened yet Like the collection should have been out for like Five six years already That's the thing that's weird It's like it's the we've had these PC capabilities And the and all to uh what is it game pass And all this shit for so long now How long game pass has been since fucking it launched with Xbox one didn't it?

No That was like 21st Yeah it was like Was it with the S? It was like 17 I remember they did a thing So it was probably like when they did a S 22's launch, like, I remember it was like, 2018, 2017, I think is when it started. Okay.

Because that was like later on in the generation when they realized they were fucked. And they were like, we got to give everybody free things. It definitely was an Xbox one. You're right. Because that was everybody was like. We have to do something about this because we're not selling stuff. Do you remember them showing fucking examples of you watching TV on your Xbox? I can't.

Yeah, they really. That was such a, you know, what's really tragic about that too is that like, they could have kept everything almost the exact same, but just reverse the order in which they showed it, and it probably would have been okay. Because, like, the problem with that machine wasn't like that you could watch TV through it. That was probably kind of cool, I guess. But, like, the problem is that that was people's first. That was when they first showed it off.

Like, they were like, this is the next generation. It's football. Through your cable box. Everything about it was shit. And then, like, three weeks later, they had their E3 showcase where they had all the games and stuff. But it's like, dude. Why did if you just reverse

Literally if you just reversed it And we're just like hey look look at all these games And then later on it's like hey look at all this extra shit People look there's no shot it would have been that bad It wouldn't have been as bad you're absolutely right The problem was first the not game sharing bullshit That happened this they just they just said so many dumb There's a lot of things

They fucked that Why do that? The easiest layup in the world by the way They had with that console All the 360 was crazy Insane They fucked that up in a way that I can't you You have to try, I feel like.

No, you gotta be really, you gotta really not understand the gaming community. They were trying to expand when they didn't need to do that. They thought. They were selling investor talking points to people. This is gonna appeal to everyone. And it, and to be, to their credit, they are, they were right. Like that is, that is. Everything turned into that, literally.

Everything did turn into that. And like, you know, people do, like, what they were doing is that they were seeing stats on 360 on Xbox Live that most people who were engaging with the 360. we're using it to watch Netflix and shit. So it's like, okay, cool. Yeah, cater to that for sure, but don't center your reveal around that. That's supposed to come later. Get people in with the games and then they'll use it for,

I still use my fucking Xbox for like, that's my main media hub, really. But like, what the fuck did you do? Every console became that. That's the thing. People are like mad at them like, the PS3 became that. The PS4 became that.

But it's just like they all became that thing. It wasn't the focus, but like, let's, branding. Branding, branding, branding, branding, branding. The fact that everyone was like, Xbox One, like, the all in one, Xbox One. And be like, what? Bad name.

Excuse me? And then it looked like a VCR. And I'm just like, oh, well, you know, you can't, you can't reverse the damage. Well, the thing is, like, all of that would have been fine if they just didn't unveil it. The first impressions are everything. And that's the problem. That's, like, they fucked it up so bad.

And also the connect being forced into the box. Oh, that's connected. Just, just, just, like, everything. the way they handle the connect. Just so many dumb things. And I'm like, on. I'm sorry.

Look at it, look it, man. Why? It didn't read black people like actually. What happened? What happened? What happened?

Well, we know marketing. Marketing the most important thing is brand recognition and the name. The name is the most important thing of all. It is the most important thing for a movie. One of the reasons to say like, you know, Furiosa could have done a lot better if it was Mad Max or whatever,

even though it was really good. So the thing is everybody was expecting. PlayStation figured it out immediately. All right, we're just going to go by numbers. It's great. So then you thought the logical conclusion for Xbox would be the same fucking thing that they're doing now. We turn it to 360.

We're going to do something. I even thought like, all right, maybe instead of doing like, maybe if they want to jump ahead and kind of like, you know, it was called Halo Infinite, I was just like, well, it should be Xbox Infinite. They could literally do it. It could have been anything after that that wasn't a number. You know, it would have been fine.

No, 7202 dumb. It would have been a little bit too lame, but I said like, if you want, to like, okay, 360, if you want to go 1080, whatever. But I was just saying like, if you want to just be like, no, Infinite Possibilities or something, I would just think Xbox Infinite or something. Even something that just a cool name.

Even the code names that they had for those machines were better than the ones that they like, Scarlet or whatever was it? Scarlet and like, uh, Scorpio, I think. And like, and even fucking the connect was like, uh, I remember when they unveiled it. It was like Project Natal or something. I was like, okay, that's interesting. but like they just fuck up everything it was it was really impressive

it's an impressive thing to like Xbox one that I'm like oh my God we already have it now and now you forced everybody and I hate this with games in general that are doing this now too where if I want to say MonoWher 2 there is there is now for some people

they have to do like which one are you talking about right yeah like and it's like now I'm forced to say original I can say original Xbox I've accepted it Xbox original is fine yeah I will say I will say props to them because like they're really the only platform where like I've bought digital games on that platform on the 360 in like 2008 and I still have them. And I can download them to my machine still. Yeah. That's that.

That is not true. Like PlayStation doesn't have that. That's true. Nintendo definitely doesn't have that. The thing about Nintendo is that if they just are like, for like if they did like one month where like, hey guys. Virtual cons for one month for one month. All the GBA game of games are available for one month on a play on the website. You know how much money they would make?

They make a lot of money. Like that month of sales would be like unprecedented. The thing that... But they won't do it. The thing that's weird to... Like you always talk about leaving money on the table. That's the thing that does baffle me as companies where I almost feel like at a certain point, they're making so much money that they just don't care to even divert from what they're doing at all.

Even though it would say like... Like why I put working this when already making so much money. You think that maximizing profits is always the endgame of like... every company, but some I just think like, we're good. Like, we're making so much money that like that extra money that we're going to make is kind of insignificant. Like, you know. So and then like, but you're like, you would please us so much.

Don't you like us? The people that are making you billions? Like, yeah, whatever. Shut the fuck up. What the fuck would be stupid, bitch? You're dumb. If you, if you stop giving us money, maybe we change. You're fucking stupid.

The thing about that is that what happened is that. We don't have the willpower to do that. We don't collectively, we're fucked. We're, I mean, you know, like, you talk about politics. Just look at the landscape. We can't come together. It makes me sad because the, we can't do it. The people we are now would have not done this civil rights movement.

That makes me so sad. Like, the current us right now would have not marched. We would have not got holes down. We would have not stopped taking the bus. We would have not got attacked by dogs. That is so fucking true. That's so fucking sad. That's when they're like, you guys have no spirit.

they're right. They're actually right. They're like, yeah, we don't. I mean, look, man. Yeah, yeah. We live in the world now. We're like, and I understand violence is not the answer. But back in the day of-

2010, I would have done it. Now, where I'm at now, I wouldn't do it. Where I'm at right now, if I saw such injustices in my own front yard, I would want to do it, right? But people that were like, oh, I guess ignore it. There's not a big problem. We're out there still doing shit. I will say, which is like insane.

Yeah. I will say the situation. is different purely because it's like they can say it's like oh we've marched or whatever it's like yeah but you have a different set of you literally lived in a different reality if you were here all you wouldn't be doing anything either like if you had this exact situation

if you had this exact setup of like you wouldn't do the same thing that you did yeah but but if the same things were happening we still wouldn't do anything what do you mean we are people we've grown so apathetic no what I mean is like if you took our generation and put it in the 60s and just like from birth and just raised them there they would

I feel like they would just do the same thing there's people again yeah yeah A lot of us will get fucking swayed Because all of us will probably waste shit in We think they are We probably get swayed into being like Yeah I'm a big it Whatever

Whatever I was gonna be racist You know Yeah it's uh We live in a fun reality Distraught DM road And he says hello homosexual Caucasians My question is

If you could come hard enough To kill a person Would you do it? Yes Yes Absolutely I would go to bathroom stalls And I'd be like

Had knock anybody What happened I blow their head off My fucking cup Blow a hole To the fucking stall That's dangerous man You got all that DNA all the place.

So what? Yeah. Where it would end up would be, they wouldn't be able to be able to find out where it is. But when it comes to, it's like fingerprints and stuff like that. If you're not in the database, they wouldn't know it's you,

right? That's how it works, right? I feel like everybody's in a database though, right? Well, now, actually. Yeah, right? Yeah, probably now. Even though I've never like, I've never, like, been arrested to give my stuff.

I've committed several crimes. I'm sure I've done some. Oh, wait, no. So me being a, I had to get customs, U.S. customs clearance to work the airport. They have all my shit, yeah. Could you probably look at me and have fingerprints? It's like, I don't ever find me. And it's just nothing.

There's nothing there. I mean, you can, you can burn them off. Yeah, but I'd be crazy. But I'm not, that's, anyone that, like, if you're talking to someone and you notice that, stop talking to. Yeah, immediately, I'm like, I don't, like, what the fuck are you doing that you need? I'm a patsy for something right now already. What are you doing that you don't need fingerprints? What the fuck are you up to?

That's like insane. Heyo, oh, what is this? Calandro sucks toes, running. He says, Hey, oh, beautiful boys. What's the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?

I don't want to talk about it. Weirdest thing. I want to talk about it. Answer right now. Answer right now. It's directed to you. Why? It's a heyo to all of us.

He said Sween, specifically. I don't know. Let me think. Mine isn't, well, it's weird to me now. but at the time as a kid I had a picture of it was some of the street fighter

and the S&K women so it was like my That's not that weird Chun Lee I wouldn't do it now because like I just don't find like cartoon I just don't I don't get like aroused I don't want to jack off the cartoons anymore

you lose it you lose the fiber of it you're like I don't know the weirdest thing for me is like I had a really like high resolution photo of the Hindenburg disaster and uh I beat a For like a good eight weeks, it was like my go-to. You were so hard seeing that shit.

I just couldn't get over it. You're the fall down. I can't walk kind of hard. Your dick is full of blow. I was incapacitated. Dude, you know. I want to tell you guys, but you guys are not going to let me finish and it's going to be terrible. No, I definitely want to hear this.

I'll let you finish. I'm not going to tell you. I'm ready. We'll let you finish. There was this really hot girl when I was the Chipmuck movies. That was a human. She was a human. Hello, hello.

I'm Malcolm Gladwell, host of Smart talks with IBM. I recently spoke with IBM's new director of research, Jake Mbeta. We discussed his vision for the future of quantum computing. At IBM research, what we always do is answer what is the future of computing, whether it's coming up with new algorithms, coming up with better AI, coming up with quantum, or coming up with just how do different accelerators go together. It's our DNA to answer the question of what is the future. Isn't it a perfect problem for IBM, because you kind of need to have a legacy of building stuff. Yes.

Building actual physical machines. Yeah, it's why I came to IBM. I wanted the experience, the culture of building hard things that others have not done before. Where do you imagine we are in the timeline of this technology? There will come a point when it will mature. Right? My cell phone is a mature technology at this point. How far are we from that point with quantum?

By 2029, we'll build the first fault-tolerant quantum computer. That is one that can run a very, very large, large problem. To learn how IBM is building the future of computing, visit IBM.com slash quantum. All right, quick quiz for the hiring managers out there. What's worse? Being understaffed or being poorly staffed? Well, that's a trick question, because both are recipes for chaos. Either way, just say to yourself, this is a job for Indeed's sponsored jobs.

You'll get matched with candidates that meet the skills, certifications, and everything else you're looking for. Or go a different way and get no traction. Seriously, sponsored jobs posted directly on Indeed are 95% more likely to report a hire than non-sponsored jobs. It really is a no-brainer. Spend less time searching and more time actually interviewing candidates who check all your boxes. Less stress, less time, more results. you need the right person to cut through the chaos, this is a job for Indeed sponsored jobs. And listeners of this show will get a $75 sponsored job credit to help your job get the premium

status it deserves at Indeed.com slash podcast. Just go to Indeed.com slash podcast right now. Indeed.com slash podcast. Terms and conditions apply. Need to hire? This is a job for Indeed sponsored jobs. And I definitely mess with it at least once. And afterwards, I was like, I really got to stop. Was she like sexy at all? Like she was, but like, no, I mean, like, was she like any, was there anything about her that was like actually supposed to be sexy? Not really. She was like a regular, like.

She was a girl that wasn't wearing a bra in a movie that I saw. She just looked like she would be nice to you. Did she at least have nipples protruding from her? Okay. Okay. I kind of get that. Because even to me as an adult, that's hot as fuck to me. Like, dude, the gooner.

The, pulling myself out of goonery was one of the hardest missions of my life. It's difficult. I had to, like, reaching down in the abyss and grandma's, I'm like, we can get out of this. And yanking myself out of the venom-esque tar. Like, I was the web that pulled Spider-Man that pulled Eddie Brock out of venom in Spider-Man 3. And I was my love. Like, I got you. We can get out.

He was like, no, I like it here. I like it here. I like what my room smells like, come. That's fucking, oh, my God. That is crazy. To come so much in a room that it takes on the odor is insane. That's like upset. That makes me want to pound on the desk.

That's all upsetting that is. Like just if I, if I walked in and smelt cum in my room, I'd be so fucking mad. Like it's just, ew. My bed sheet would not drape on me. You would just be hard placed off my body.

It's like a slate. It's like a cape for an action figure. It's like a hard piece. It's so funny too. It's not even like it would be like an offensive smell. It just be like this is not what should be here. This is not like, this is not okay.

The context of this is not all right. There's cum. I got to tell you. That would probably be the ultimate, like, say if I walked into my friend's house or something, and I smell come. I would immediately, like, just walk the fuck out and be like mad. Like, yeah, where you go? I just smell your fucking come. I just smell your cum, you piece of shit.

You fucking assaulted me. You kind of. I fucking hate you. Are you fucking porth yourself on me? And I've never, I would never do that to you. That's, I imagine that's like probably Asmond Gold. Like, there's probably like a portion of his house. What it's not like?

house he works at right i do when i saw the when i saw dude i've i've been messy before in my room before yeah seeing that was mind blowing i was like this is insane did you see did you see uh so there was something that went viral um uh there was something that went viral like say uh let me see you keep your place like that dude let me see like that's insane dude it's really it's really crazy that's he has to be single dude oh well well well i don't know he's He's got money. He's had like some, yeah, exactly. He's had some pretty, you know, they look like booby streamers or whatever the fuck. Did they live with him?

I don't know. They definitely don't live with it. Probably not. Because if you live with a girl, that's the thing that switches that switch off immediately. Yeah. The moment you have the share space with a woman, at least that's any relatively cleanly, that shit will switch off fast. Well, no. Well, all right.

You don't agree? I don't agree only because I'm also clean. Well, no, if you are like that. Right, right. If you are like that. It's the one thing that. In fact, most women that I've lived with, it compared to you, probably.

Compared to you probably. Like, I've been like, yo, can you fucking, can you clean, can you clean that? Compared to you, yeah. Because you're a very, you're a cleanly, very clean person. Like, I'm a dude. Like, before living with Lily,

I definitely wasn't the cleanliest. Now I get anxious with places aren't cleanly. Yeah. Because I'm like, oh, she's going to yell at me. That's the anxiety that I would feel when we all live together. And things were like messy. I was like, why the fuck is there food there?

Yeah, I get anxious now. Like, I'm like, literally like, Food being out is insane. Like when I go to Ben and mean's house and I like, whenever like we're hanging out and like we see like the, like if we're out of food right and there's food like in the, the kitchen, I get nervous.

Because I'm like, nervous is a lot. I don't want to have to clean this shit later. Oh my God. Here we go. I don't live here anymore. Thank fucking God. Oh,

because you lived. Okay. I see. So you have like a. Because you've lived there. So it's like you remember having the responsibility. Yeah. But you don't live there anymore.

But there's like a still a psychological link. There's like me living. I'm like, that makes. That makes more sense. I think you meant just like at a friend's house in general, like you get nervous seeing their kitchen during. I was like,

that's kind of crazy. Yeah, no, I just get like annoyed. I definitely get annoyed by like filth, but I'm luckily most, everyone I know is cleanly. I don't, I don't have any like filthy fucking friends.

And I have, you know, when I was dating around back in the day, uh, one of my, uh, this fucking tiny ass fucking little black chick that I dated. She was so tiny.

And she had her friend was, oh my god it was the worst apartment i've ever seen in my fucking life this sink look like i don't know silent hill shit i don't know how it gets because i've been i've seen messy it was like green women women are shockingly filthy with their places sometimes sometimes if it's if it's women living together the hair it can get bad it's hair everywhere there was hair fucking everywhere the drain has hair in it no one seems to care um i'm like you got you can buy a little thing that will catch the hair or just have fucking It's a fucking courtesy.

Yeah, there's that. The courtesy is the big thing, right? The basic courtesy of just like, oh, I just showered, let me like... Like, I understand, like, having a dishes in the sink, you know, like... Because I've done it. Like, I'm not going to have, like, letting a sink build up. But to the point, there's, like, mold and shit. Like, that's insane.

Dude, I have seen... I have seen... Hello, hello. I'm Malcolm Gladwell, host of Smart Talks with IBM. I recently spoke with IBM's new director of research, Jake Embedda. We discussed his vision for the future of quantum computer. At IBM research, what we always do is answer what is the future of computing, whether it's coming up with new algorithms, coming up with better AI, coming up with quantum, or coming up with just how do different accelerators go together. It's our DNA to answer the question of what is the future. Isn't it a perfect problem for IBM because you kind of need to have a legacy of building stuff?

Yes. Building actual physical machines. Yeah, it's why I came to IBM. I wanted the experience, the culture of building hard things that others have not done before. Where do you imagine we are in the timeline of this technology? There will come a point when it will mature. Right? Yeah.

My cell phone is a mature technology at this point. How far are we from that point with Condo? By 2029, we'll build the first fault-tolerant quantum computer. That is one that can run a very, very large, large problem. To learn how IBM is building the future of computing, visit IBM.com slash quantum. All right, quick quiz for the hiring managers out there. What's worse? Being understaffed or being poorly staffed?

Well, that's a trick question, because both are recipes for chaos. Either way, just say to yourself, this is a job for indeed sponsored jobs. You'll get matched with candidates that meet the skills, certifications, and everything else you're looking for. Or go a different way and get no traction. Seriously, sponsored jobs posted directly on Indeed are 95% more likely to report a hire than non-sponsored jobs. It really is a no-brainer. Spend less time searching and more time actually interviewing candidates who check all your boxes. Less stress, less time, more results. When you need the right person to cut through the chaos, this is a job for Indeed sponsored jobs. And listeners of this

show will get a $75 sponsored job credit to help your job get the premium status it deserves at indeed.com slash podcast just go to indeed.com slash podcast right now indeed dot com slash podcast terms and conditions apply need to hire this is a job for indeed sponsored jobs pads on top of the toilet on the tank used there's I'm not even not even remotely kidding I've never I came over. I'm friends with you, first off. How dare you? Like, how could you possibly be this comfortable doing this?

Has no one ever took? My thing is that you, like, even having people over. I've seen that one time, actually. Now that you said that. I've never seen that. Now that you say that, I've seen it one time. I have people over, it's not that hard to clean afterwards. Like, I had Chris over this early this week, and we cooked and everything.

And then we just spent like a half an hour cleaning. Like, because I think we overclean at my house sometimes. I feel like we clean the country. Sounds like it. It sounds like over clean. Yeah. But to just clean up after like a day or two is not hard. It's really it's really not hard.

Here's the thing. Here's the thing. It's fine to be to have a mess, right? Mess is one thing. Filth is something else. I don't know how you get there. That's when you graduate. Well,

you grew up that way. So then it's like say the women that leave the, the page around, they obviously grew up that way. That's so crazy. They literally, it does not compute in their minds that there's anything wrong with that.

Imagine if you. I don't know. you get to films. Imagine. You grew up that way. You remember that story you told in the last episode where you shat your pants? Of course. Yeah.

I'll never forget that moment. Imagine. Do you remember it? Imagine. Imagine removing those clothes, balling them up and putting them on top of the, on top of the fucking toilet tank. I put it in a toilet tank that my grandma used. She would have killed, dog, I would have died.

She would have blood-eagled me. She would have blood-eagued me and put me all in front of my house. Like I'm the front of a ship. Yeah. She would have drawn a quarter to you, I think. She would have killed me. She would like Kingston. Are you serious?

I'm like, sorry, grandma. I didn't know where to put my shitty pants. She would have did it herself somehow. She would have caught. She was somehow one. Somehow a drawn court. Like she clothes herself. She just takes turns on every limb.

So she just yanks so hard and then pop. It pops off like a. It pops off like a. It pops off like. a fucking toy. Yeah. Like a dragon ball joint arm. That is straight, man.

That is straight. There's no blood. There's no blood. The muscle. Whoa. You're mad. I'm so fucking cool, dude. She just grabs me to pops my head off.

Yeah. I think she would summon that. Like if you saw, I think I would be able to do that too, though. If I saw shitty draws just sitting in the, on the toilet. On the commuter. I'm in the free. Full of shit.

Full of shit in the bathroom that everybody uses. You're not seeing in Fallout where the armor power armor crushes the guy's head? That's what I'm like come here.

I think I'm turning into like the juggerna. I think I'm like I'm summoning magic to just become like unstoppable. Give me a crimson gem. I'm destroying everything

at that point. At that point I'm destroying everything. I think I'm becoming the Joker, I think. You just start laughing and saying that. The idea of someone's saying that. I think I'm becoming the Joker.

I think I'm the Joker now. I think I'm the Joker now. I think I'm a fake laughing. I think I'm becoming the Joker, I think. That's a wild, dude. But I get, I get being a, because being a teenage boy, less shit bothers you.

You're so focused on dumb things. That bothered me always. Mother of me. I mean, I would clean up when there's a mess. When there's like a big mess, I would clean up. But my boundary to the point where I would clean up was way higher before.

That's the little thing it was. I did a couple of, like, gross things when I was a teenager. I remember, I remember this one time because I almost wanted to explain to my mom because I had this shirt and I was eating something

I don't remember it left like a bad taste on my mouth and I didn't spit out any food but I just like spit on one of my shirts it was on the floor my shirt was on the floor and I was like and I was like kind of just spit on the shirt and I was like I was gonna it was a graphic shirt that I made and it was shitty I was thinking about like I'm gonna throw it away eventually

I didn't get to it right away and my mom had one of those days where she just like wanted to clean my room I guess I don't know if she was being nosy she rarely did that so but that the dry spit on the shirt looked like it was probably dry cum like it probably looked like because like

because who normally spits on a shirt right it's a very that is a very rare thing but like somebody but I imagine it's probably no different than like people using their socks and shit yeah so like I'm thinking in my head I'm like oh no she probably thinks like came in all my shirt

and like that the idea of that wash it just left it there so the idea is it just like your cum shirt? I imagine having a cum shirt that looks tie-died. But I'm sure people it's like sepia tone tie-dye. It's like what the fuck, dude?

Why? It's the shades of whiteish pink and red. It's shades of white. Jesus Christ. Red. And then like, fucking crazy. But yeah, people stands on its own.

You hear about like jizz rags and stuff. So I was just like, oh no, she probably thinks like because I was always just a tissue Kleenex guy. Yeah. Like just why the fuck wouldn't you use that? I was a right. at my mirror kind of guy. Then I came so much at my mirror to the point that it looked like it was fine.

I thought you're going to say it came so much on your mirror that it began to look like you. My mirror became me. The idea of coming on your mirror, the cleaning that up sounds so fucking crazy. You don't clean it up. You come on it to the point that it coats over so then the fridge is yet again reflected. So it's like a laminar. It almost looks laminated. Yeah, exactly.

Okay. Like my Yu-Gi-o cards, I didn't fucking put in plastic. I came on them so much that it was laminated. That is insane. Here, my lambs. You get those appraised. You take them to like some card shop and they're like, hey, can you, how much is this worth? And they put them in their microscope and they see fucking.

They're still very alive. They're still very alive. And you go, sir, this is, this is, did you come on these? It's like almost exclusively. You're playing games. You know, you have to shuffle the other person's deck. Whenever you want to start to match, you're like, And he's like, he breaches.

This guy brings pins. What the fuck? Is this blue? No, it's back in my tongue. It's sperm, sir. That right to me. You have a large sperm. It's like night before Christmas when he's trying to make the Christmas cutouts.

That's so gross. You fucking, you go, you go. He's appraising him and shit. Like, he acts like he's disgusted. You leave, you know. He's like, go take a look around. And this motherfucker is just going to town. You come back and it's just the card only

Where is my cum plastic? Where's my laminate? Where's my cum laminate? Well, you know, to be able to actually appraising There's just come all over his face. He's like, well. He looks like Squidward No, Spudred, no, it's Patrick

and that episode when he ate the chocolate. I don't exactly know what happened. He looks like he ate a mime. I don't know, man. I think there was a cum bandit or something. something, but uh, uh,

come bubble. Come glab your bubble. That's crazy. That bubbles like a million generations. That's great. That's a lot of them would have cured cancer. That's great. That section of that bubble would have solved world hunger.

Yep. That's crazy. And the other one would have caused the second Holocaust. Another one is definitely Hitler times five. Yeah, Hitler times five. That is so charismatic. He's,

his charisma checks are off. The persuasion, 20 every time plus 13 to it. You're like, Yo, this guy's nuts. He's scoring into the 40s with dice rolls. Dice rolls, the die goes up the 20.

He's getting up the 40s. He's getting 40s. Easily. I got a one that puts me at 38. That's crazy. That is fucking insane. That guy never loses anything ever. Literally, I'm playing D&D right now with another group of my friends.

I'm like, everybody's level 10. one guy has a plus 14 to persuasion and I'm like bro don't do no fuck shit man And he was like what do you mean It's like do not no shit with women You have to please You have to Yeah

No one other point What's the point of playing if you don't You can you can convince people of shit But don't like Yeah but why don't you get dressed You should probably get naked for me right now 32 32

He's just an analog clock caress those boobies I want her to punch herself in a labia hard 32 again 32 again can I say I'm on fire liable talent

He has a die I can go less than a 10 It's a 32 side of die And every number is 32 Every number is 32 It's like It's like a bunch of numbers And it's four 20s on there

It's like one two three four five It's 16 20 20, 20. And I'm like, bro. Yeah, 38. The worst of 38. You're like, why is that there?

Yeah. That's fucking upsetting. I'm getting freaky in this game. Yeah, I mean. Real freaky. I'd play with that, dude. I would not. Why?

You don't want to... He's too honest. He's too honest of a representation of the group that would play that. Yeah. You know what I mean? It's true. It's like a dark reflection. It's like, this is what you could be if you fell a little bit further.

I mean, my old party already is really fucked up. Like, Lily's character robs everybody. Like, actually, like, Bullgarten. It's bad. Because she does violent robberies. What do you mean? Like, she can use her magic for people to sleep. She's like, no, I want to fight that guy.

And it's like, that's a regular commoner. Oh, so she's like, nah, I want him. I want him to get beat up. I don't want to kill him, though. I want to cut his fourth can off and shove it up his nose. I don't want to kill him, though. What? Damn.

Why would you do that to some? Like, what does that prove? You already robbed him. It proves that you can do it. I want to get his fourthkin. I want to get a real dull, dull knife with a sharp tip, though. The rest of it's dull, and I want to just anchor it off. Is that what Lily does?

She's a fuckhead. Yeah? All right, well. I want to shove his balls. I want to shove my knee up his asshole and spin real fast. That's crazy. While slowly opening my leg till at the point it's fully extended. Oh, look.

20. What don't I have to roll? She's like that, though. She gets him too. What are you talking about? I actually, what are you talking about? When you play D&D, you roll. well for some bullshit reason always.

I don't know why you're... Well, let's go to play Crabson. Let's go to tables. That's the thing. It's like if I try to do it. We'll tease the power for real. It only happens in games that I begrudgingly play. I see.

That I'm good at. So if you do that, you'll end up like owing your life. I will be shot to death in that casino. They will unleash whatever, like, I don't know, the casino war beasts. Do you have that, do you have that? You have that, um... Casino Warbeast. That kind of makes sense.

It's fucking weird to think about, but um, do you have the itch, the gambling it or no? A gamton, no I don't like it really Like I don't like I like Casinos as like a Like I like I like the imagery of it

Like there's something about casino Like I like wandering through a casino and drinking in a casino There's something cool about it But like I don't care really at all about like The games I don't have the it for like I play card games And bring a card game player You have to have it

To buy the cards and open a packs You have to have the itch But I don't want to do that Every Yeah I think the only way Regular people on average would get the itches if they had a lot of exposed, uh,

disposed, um, yeah, disposable income. Even that. Even that. Well, that,

because it's, it's fun to do if you don't mind losing money. Because they're designed for you to be down. Right. Yeah. Like, you have to invest a certain amount of money to either recover it or actually hit big.

So there's- idea of me doing that. I feel like I would hit big like three times. I don't ever get killed. They would kill me. I think I'm a gambler. I think I'm a gambler. I would just be like,

ow, and be-o-o-law. Right. Yeah, the fucking, the casino fucking rifles that are just on the ceilings, they're just there. And then they see someone winning too good. And then it just points to them and, like, p. Like slumdog millionaire, when they take him in the back, like, you're cheating. It's like, I'm not cheating.

I don't watch Indian stuff. It's a silent, it's a silent gun, too. I don't watch Indians stuff. It's like a silenced weapon. I don't watch Indians at all, period. I've never seen anything with an Indian in it. That's fucking crazy. The fact that the Indians exist make me really mad, in fact, I don't watch anything.

I've never seen any. You were, we were just talking about RRR recently. He read a synopsis. He didn't find that. Wait. No, he goes like, Those are Indians? Those are Indians?

Fuck. Fuck. He just had like three times. He just had three times and forgets. And the fucking podcast. I'm fucking upset. I'm, I feel like I'm probably,

I probably am a gambler, just not with money. Yeah, I mean. The worst kind, I feel like, you know what, gambler? Yeah. I gamble with my life. I like gamble with my life.

I like going to work. my piece. I play going raw and Justin in their women and hoping they don't get pregnant. Let me risk my piece this week. I found out my sperm's like a little fucked up and I was so happy. I was like, no wonder why don't I have kids, dude. You found out your sperm is a little fucked up? My sperm's a little well. I don't know if it's always

been that way, but like I got some like I need to look it up because every time I talk about it, I don't remember what it's called. It's like angular. It's like no. They're hooked. No, I got some. I got some I got some of my two. I think that they think I think I had some trauma to my tube stuff that's like going on neck attached to my balls.

And I was like, I don't know. I've never been kicked in the ball. Like, I literally avoided the balls. I've been kicking the ball so hard I fucking woke up later. I used to ride my bike a ton so I think maybe I fucked them up that way because I used to do 19 mile round trips to work. And then that is such insane cardio daily. 18. I used to do 28 miles because I'd ride to the beach and back.

I got to be so tired when you get home It felt It was the greatest feeling though Oh yeah that you get the cardio high I was amazing Because also the sun just being at the beach So I ride there 14 miles Just soak in soak in there

Just get it and getting crispy I started to get fucking dark dude And then I'd ride back It was It's basically the complete opposite Of how I feel right now Because I feel like shit I feel like shit

Then I feel like a fucking guy Just your hands off the bike I got kicking the ball so hard that I threw up Yeah, it happens Yeah, 100% Instantly No Like the final was already right here

It was very little delay It was so bad My God I don't remember the reason Yeah, thank God I remember I didn't do anything to deserve it though It was actually

I don't know where I've definitely been kicked at the ball By girls and girls They don't engage it Because guys They're like all right Like my brain's not going to me kill humanity too hard.

So let me gauge it. But girls are just like... Girls don't understand. Fuck you. Girls will... Bring back their footlight. Like if you're playing a fucking... You're turning me into future right now, just thinking about that shit. Like, I'm like... Did he be with me?

Did he be with me? Did he be with me? So a massage. Did you grow dread? You don't get it. It's like... Is that... Is that super...

It's super blue. It's super blue. just hate women. That shades on dread. Women don't deserve it. Women don't deserve it. We'll be here all goddamn day. Honestly,

I wonder how long. Let's fuck up some women. I wonder how long we've gone with the podcast. If we just kept going, like whatever episode we just kept going. Let's see how long we can really talk about shit. We can do that one day. And then tell you what,

we'll have one camera angle for that one. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, for sure. Let me just keep going. They get an eight-hour podcast. We could probably. We could probably go for a very, very long time. We'd have to go live for that.

We would go live and we would just record us just kind of shooting the shit. Oh, yeah. We could not upload that. For sure, that would go live because that would fuck whoever's computer on. We get a, we get a, we got to get compensated for that, dude. God damn. Yeah, we get some, uh, who has PayPal? We do PayPal donation.

We'll put that at the $25 tier. Yeah, yeah, yeah. We'll be like our eight hour podcast. That'd be an $85 year, bro. We just go on for a movie. It would be funny to just like. As like kind of like a almost like a sacred symbols joke to just kind of like have a show that is twice as long as that long show Yeah, I mean and it's about nothing

It's not about it either. It's no topic we're just talking about it. I feel like you guys do have eight hour podcasts No, we are you sure what we've ever had the longest I think that we've done was like like 27 five 27 hour I did an 11 hour stream Collins like I'm gonna read the Bible I'm gonna read the Bible in reverse through a mirror that's so fucking dumb oh my god

so he he goes to the end and then puts a monocle and he's like in the beginning God prayed heaven that's crazy last page first

yeah the last page first it'll be the most disoriented so you like read it like so like I don't know what it says at the end is it that the end of the Bible it says the end it says Finn The is. So then you got to like open it.

It knows the credits. And it's the Bible credit. Oh, yes. Oh, yes. God. At the end of it, it says Thanos will return. So you have to just read backwards.

So it makes zero sense. Exactly. So return will. Hello, hello. I'm Malcolm Gladwell, host of the podcast Smart Talks with IBM. I recently sat down with IBM's chairman and CEO, Arvin Krishna.

And I asked him, how can company, use AI to its fullest potential to create smarter business. My one advice to them, pick areas you can scale. Don't pick the shiny little toys on the side. For example. If anybody has more than 10% of what they had for customer service 10 years ago, they're already five years behind it.

If anybody is not using AI to make their developers, who write software 30% more productive today, with the goal of being 70% more productive. Yeah. Wow. So we are not asking our clients to be the first experiment on it. We say, you can leverage what we did. We're happy to bring out all our learnings, including what needs to change in the process,

because the biggest change is not technology, is getting people to accept that there's a different way to do things. To listen to the full conversation, visit IBM.com. Smart Talks. All right, quick quiz for the hiring managers out there. What's worse? Being understaffed or being poorly staffed? Well, that's a trick question, because both are recipes for chaos.

Either way, just say to yourself, this is a job for Indeed's sponsored jobs. You'll get matched with candidates that meet the skills, certifications, and everything else you're looking for. Or go a different way and get no traction. Seriously, sponsored jobs posted directly on Indeed are 95% more likely to report a higher than non-sponsored jobs. It really is a no-brainer.

Spend less time searching and more time actually interviewing candidates who check all your boxes. Less stress, less time, more results. When you need the right person to cut through the chaos, this is a job for Indeed's sponsored jobs. And listeners of this show will get a $75 sponsored job credit to help your job get the premium status it deserves. At Indeed.com slash podcast. Just go to Indeed.com slash podcast right now. Indeed.com slash podcast. Terms and conditions apply.

Need to hire? This is a job for Indeed's sponsored jobs. Thanos. Niterb or something like that. Oh, you have to read it like. Yeah, no, he's reading it in January. Like to the point where like if you reverse the entire stream, it would be like just reading the Bible.

That's, I don't think that's ever been done before. No, I mean, we could do it. Let's not. We could pioneer it. I literally just found my holy Bible from 94. I have a Bible from 94 And I was like, look at this dumb thing I like stealing Bibles from hotels

It is cool I'm starting to notice that a lot of hotels They stop putting Bibles in people People like they keep stealing them They kept stealing them I definitely had sex one time It came on a Bible a lot That is

I feel like that's crazy You weren't gonna come that much And you saw the Bible And you came way more It was like Oh man that Jewish guy With his holes in his hand And then it started

The Bible started glowing It started rotating around you Like a la carte So that's the secret That's amazing Dark metamorphosis I come on to buy it when it flows Alright we gotta get the fuck out

This is exactly what we're talking about We're just keep going Yeah so thank you guys for stopping by Thank you we appreciate you Come on over to Patreon icon slash snark tank Also snarktank.shop I forgot to mention it in the beginning Whatever Come on over there

Pop on over yonder We're doing some clips now also so Share our stuff like it If you like this episode, like it on the feeds that you're seeing it on. I won't. Go it. Sweeney's going to read the top 25. He's going to read the $25 and up patrons now.

Oh, my fuck. Oh, my God. Let me raise the brightness so you can see because you're blind. I need every advantage possible. I like this asshole still refuses to like get glasses. Alaskan oil field. Okay. So.

Pee-p. Here we go. We got, you got to pay the trolls told to get into the boys' hole. We got Gates. We got bank account reads minus $102.34. But Chris is still reading my name. So we're really winning here. People, which got, we got, we got a pee-p.

When the foot falls asleep, I scream pussy while stomping and punching my leg until it goes away. RIP3 vertical screens era. We hardly knew ye June 10, 2003. to June 10th Really was it? No July 10th You said 2003 Motherfucker Read it again

The whole thing Yeah start for the beginning That's crazy If you make one mistake You have to start over I'm not doing that I'm insane thing to do I'll leave

I'm so dyslexic I'll just be like I'm going home guys I quit the podcast I'm done One day Okay What you call July 10th

2023 to June 10th 2024 The fact that we ended on such a close time together. It's really funny. That's crazy that it also it was July. I felt like we were doing it longer, but I guess it makes sense. That's crazy, dude. Uh, non-binary Cajun, me fishy, spreading incantations to the

pussy, call me the spirit box. She's nine. She's nine on my 11 until I never forget. I'll carpet bomb the Gaza strip for a quarter. John Strickland. My partner snapped my chair legs off of my, my partner snapped the chair legs off of my Chris Reagan on YouTube's and proceeded to tear off my legs

in self-defense Merck's 1889 Tiz in fact A tism The first church of Keith of David The new format makes it easier To me to jack off

It's easier to jack off to this shit That's really fucked up Facts The second church of Keith David Feathing being better Than the first of Keith David We got pre-Rogs We got Blake 9896

We got disastrously big Dicks Dicking down Big Booty bitches Productions Productions We got FYI It's been almost a year and Mama Jeff is still missing. Yep. We got Chris trying to read like

Papa papa papa we got Frankenstein's monster but the doc puts his balls on his chin. We got Alaska oil full trash we got Texas Tater salad young Sheldon thrown from the Empire State Building sue Hulk tick on my ass here's Nikki Ziggy ghost of Mama J.F sorry miss Jackson badly brave hugger Derek duck cunt the vegan necromancer I got I got consent Yeah, I'll sure about that. Aetherian, we got Brogerian punter. What is this?

Naphram, I think it's his name. We got Malfus 1 finally rehabilitated in the bag into the saddle with two functioning hands. What is the thing? Is that a, is that a fellow fella? That's a good drawing, but also disgusting. We got King of Hat Hazard. That's Armintrout. Why'd you start from the beginning, dude?

Why did you start from the beginning? It was at the back because I said King Hatazard just now. You gave it to me on a third page. Wait, did I really? No, no way. No, hold on. That's why I was, I was saying, like, because I said Sue Hulk, and I was like, what the fuck? Oh, Sue Hulk is at the end.

I went to the second page just now. What? Oh, whatever. No, the habit is last. So you go backwards? Whatever, just go backwards, and then King of Habitat again at the end. So just go to the running and go back. No, just you know King of Habazzo is last.

So just say it last. I'm going to say it last anyway, because you're my fucking friend, haphazard. It was dope meeting him a person. That was fucking wild. Yeah, we had sex. Hello, hello. I'm Malcolm Gladwell. host of Smart Talks with IBM.

I recently spoke with IBM's new director of research, Jake Embatta. We discussed his vision for the future of quantum computing. At IBM Research, what we always do is answer what is the future of computing, whether it's coming up with new algorithms, coming up with better AI, coming up with quantum, or coming up with just how do different accelerators go together. It's our DNA to answer the question of what is the future. Isn't it a perfect problem for IBM because you kind of need to have a legacy of building stuff? Yes.

Building actual physical machines. Yeah, it's why I came to IBM. I wanted the experience, the culture of building hard things that others have not done before. Where do you imagine we are in the timeline of this technology? There will come a point when it will mature. Right? Yeah. My cell phone is a mature technology at this point.

How far are we from that point with quantum? By 2029, we'll build the first fault-tolerant quantum computer. That is one that can run a very, very large, large problem. To learn how IBM is building the future of computing, visit IBM.com slash quantum. All right, quick quiz for the hiring managers out there. What's worse? Being understaffed or being poorly staffed? Well, that's a trick question, because both. are recipes for chaos. Either way, just say to yourself, this is a job for Indeed's sponsored jobs.

You'll get matched with candidates that meet the skills, certifications, and everything else you're looking for. Or go a different way and get no traction. Seriously, sponsored jobs posted directly on Indeed are 95% more likely to report a hire than non-sponsored jobs. It really is a no-brainer. Spend less time searching and more time actually interviewing candidates who check all your boxes. Less stress, less time, more results. When you need the right person to cut through the chaos, this is a job for Indeed sponsored jobs. And listeners of this show will get a $75-sponsored job credit

to help your job get the premium status it deserves at Indeed.com slash podcast. Just go to Indeed.com slash podcast right now. Indeed.com slash podcast. Terms and conditions apply. Need to hire? This is a job for Indeed's sponsored jobs. I like this guy. We got Caucasian container the Cracker Barrow for Gaze.

We got disgruntled Donald Trump burping on Dom's clit. A Frenchman ate up playing. Google it and disgust. We got Max Silhouette. We got it's absurd. How superb your turd is in my burger. Eminem not sure which track. She got you pippin on my pippa.

Possum, Sweeney showers in sneakers. That's fucking crazy. Play the Dragons. Play the Dragon. I'm like a drag infinite wealth. You bitches. Insulting that bro. Wait, wait.

Insisting that brow is a stand-up guy, a monkey biting a baby soft spot, just a hard art. We got Stark Coffee. We got ripped a digital hookah. Now I'm getting molested on a set of embryonic Sheldon. We got grippy-grippy. I call her because it's grippy, Jermaine Cole, 1997's. Wait, number 97 on the top 100 rappers alive. That's really crazy.

We got my son frozen the deaths of the waste of Ohio by going homeless to pay. You fuck. And he's now, and this is now his memorial, RIP, John. We got Transfamem Gremlin. We got exposing people with lactose intolerance to 900,000 rodogens of ionized radiation. We got Yush Vintpen. We got, oh, my God. Because every time we come, I licked his penis.

And every time I did, it pulls in my mouth. Nice. Can you suck my cock, so? It's so Yeah It ends there It's your boy Shawnee D

Gay Grim Reaper Called him Rim Reaper We got Hung Hung Shilden My Hung Sheldon We got Hung Sheldon

Sheldon Shetons That I remember Of course it is Shut up man I was a nerd Dude We got 847

In a black Week Giving Bill Clay in the most miserable blow job in the Oval Office. We got 3XO up to a bunch of ants. He did X-O picking up a bunch of ants from a pound putting them on his head of a three-year-old

real. We got George Lucas firing an RPG at the Goodyear Blint because it rhymes. Wok is 2023. We're all about the DIE now. DIE. I. Slurping, stroking, smoking, joking. A model con is going like this. Drip M.H. Lord of Homeless

strip, Kayu's parents sending him to Jeff Epstein's Island for having cancer. American outlaw Winchlow and the cream corn kid. That's so fucking crazy. We got Bliggers did 9-11. Obie Wachia Blominy Norwegian game dev. Not developing Piss Quest featuring Lillian Swin. Kremlin of which call, we got Lord Botholomew.

hand job inventor of anal sex hmm we got I'm gonna steal wait I'm gonna steal your bones that's fucking crazy like Sweeney looks like he's being questioned in person

we got come come come come come come come are you ready Shadman or Shadow Man Shadman seriously I'd be wild

The Shadman was here I wouldn't I don't want that She makes me rise against Until I appeal to reason straight Derek be like, yeah Pussy's pretty good. I can appreciate ass too. Wage slave

5A3. We got a sad guy from Michigan. We got the Pony Brothers moderating the great space with the great space. That's all it is actually. Modering the great space. Sween lost, loses points for not knowing the term sphere.

We got Dunk Dunkerson, Jeffrey Han Jobsen. Listen to my spot by Your Pretty Hands down the best original gay song I've heard Page 1 guys I'm sorry I'm doing this to you all They made me do this

You got Sween Swin eating his curtains like a month He waltons on my gagons to like ghoul Hain women like hit in women We got Vaughn of the Dead Spiro the drag queen Round Night Asian

I apologize for my Likerma Likes Menderman joke It was stolen I'll hire a pet for my sins It's all right dude It's okay We got Sweene's white

My father figure My father figure is actually white It's pretty sad Oh no my granddad's a black man The other one is white Me? No Yeah I can see it in you

What? Yeah Whiteness? Yeah What about me is white What about that's a crazy question Look at that Look at that

My black ass skin. Look at that. Look at you. You tell me you're not white. Actually, Spider-Man could in fact defeat him. Actually. Oh, a little Digimon. Now that I think and I ponder and I wonder about it.

I'm a DM. Now that I'm pontificating about Marvel, I can't help but wonder. You guys are DMing girls about pussy and I'm deeming them about DMs. You're not real. Hey, girl. I'm a dundic. Dungeon Master. I wasn't a dungeon master when I was talking to girls.

So that was definitely not true. I would have, though. I would have. You would have got me pussy too probably. I can't stop dungeon out. Done the right way I could have got me pussy. I can't stop dungeon masturbating. God, I fucking hate my job, bro.

My freedom spreads for democracy until I liberate. Carrying Chris around town as my pocket pussy, femme boy son, Lord of the. the Lord of Mordor. Ares, destroy Israel. My life is yours. Not for real, though.

I like coming on, one shoe, one sock, one shoe. That's pretty good. Death. Why? Slows them down a little bit. It's like you're,

it's like you're, it's like you're putting life on a die. You know what I mean? Yeah. It's like life and death. It's like life. It's life and dife. Life.

Well, funny, next word, next name death. Life and dife. Popped in the sack, call it poop. Wait, pooped in a sack.

Fucked in a sack. Fuck my Fuck my chungest life What the fuck? That's a weird one Uh-oh Jack the world's fastest Majority

Brow said he's Learning how to make a solid booty What solid body Electric guitar What is a solid electric guitar exactly I mean

It's my ass Yeah It's his ass You're gonna tell me And then you fucked it up I was gonna learn something Piece of shit You just Google it

Have the AI tell you Hello hello Hello, I'm Malcolm Gladwell, host of Smart Talks with IBM. I recently spoke with IBM's new director of research, Jake Mbata. We discussed his vision for the future of quantum computing. At IBM Research, what we always do is answer what is the future of computing, whether it's coming up with new algorithms, coming up with better AI, coming up with quantum, or coming up with just how do different accelerators go together.

It's our DNA to answer the question of what is the future. Isn't it a perfect problem for IBM because you kind of need to have a legacy of building stuff? Yes. Building actual physical machines. Yeah, it's why I came to IBM. I wanted the experience, the culture of building hard things that others have not done before. Where do you imagine we are in the timeline of this technology? There will come a point when it will mature.

Right? Yeah. My cell phone is a mature technology at this point. How far are we from that point with quantum? By 2029, we'll build the first fault-tolerant quantum computer. That is one that can run a very, very large, large problem. To learn how IBM is building the future of computing, visit IBM.com slash quantum. All right, quick quiz for the hiring managers out there.

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This is a job for Indeed's sponsored jobs. Finish it! Finish it. My boyfriend has a 24 by 32 inch wall print Of gay furry artwork Fat-a-Mitty stinks Andy the man who's The woman whose hand jobs

Or handies are now A-tier and Dan A-tier but not as dandy That's unfortunate Dan I'll think it better Yeah Telling a white woman that my dog is gay Yeah he's gay He's a gay rescue

He's a gay rescue That's crazy Nice hard tears Charlie Licklix You dumbass Heath smoker Gids Who's up yoinke

He's up yonke and spoinky right now Living on borrowed come My ass drips faster Ooh is ooh Is ooh Sign here to Sign here to help cock destiny He's not here to have

Cuck destiny for me Isn't he in an open relationship That's fucking weird man No he's actually She left or something Yeah she left and everybody Made fun of them Because

People suck I guess Well I think he sucks I mean he definitely has some moments I mean, I just think that, like, it's just not, it's not sustainable, man. It's not sustainable, especially if you're trying to do, like, oh, I'm a fucking caveman, but, like, I have clout, so I'm going to be with these fucking women that clearly don't actually like me. They like my clout.

Like, what are you fucking stupid? It's a quick way. Like, for a smart guy, he's really fucking stupid, you know what I mean? Bussing even, yeah. I feel like he, I don't know. That's most smart people, to be fair. There's a lot of people. Especially if they get any, like, fame or prominence.

Because, like, here, let's be honest, look at. Destiny objectively. Like, is that a handsome man? I'm not trying to like, he's a very he's a very, he's a very, he's a very standard guy. He's like, he is just the average, like an average person. He's like an average. He's the so average in a way that I'm like, all right, dude, you're gonna get these fucking, like, really, really hot girls. Well, these girls that are like, uh, conventionally attractive that are like, you know, like they. Right, but let's, let's also not just, let's also not pretend like that's not a lot of, I mean, most, most, most hot people. Most hot people are hot because they like, you know, they're covered in fucking.

makeup and shit. Well, no, I mean, there's, if the thing, I would say that, you can say that about, like, you can probably say that about, like, most famous women, but like, the male actors, they don't cake on the makeup. They're just, like, they use makeup, obviously. They use makeup, but it's just, you know, highlighting attributes, not to the point where they look different, like, it's a clown makeup. Right. I guess what I'm saying, what I'm saying is that the, the, disparity between their, their level of, like, natural attractiveness is probably not really as steep as it seems because like women just try more. Yeah, yeah.

I just, I just, I just think, that's, that's true to that. I just think there's, there's very beautiful people out there naturally without, like, say, Scarlett Johansson, I think without makeup, you've seen her, I think she's a very attractive person.

There's a lot of, you know, Paul Rubens. My point, Paul Rubin's. And, but I just, I just think that, like, doing that whole,

that you're skipping so many steps. Right, yeah, I know you mean. Like, you're skipping way too many steps. I'm like, destiny, like, as, you know, I'm not even talking about any of the shit. I don't care about that. get somebody that you could fucking get if you weren't famous

brother like that's the only way it's gonna or find your ride or die man that's what I mean but that's how you find them well before you got fame that's what I mean so get someone who's like on your level as far as like she's cool as fuck not like oh she's a hot booby streamer or whatever the fuck yeah you fuck those

you don't marry those men yeah come on brother you enjoy your time you marry them and give me in an open relationship come on brother the only destiny I care about is a video the video that's what I'm talking about man He has some good takes. He had also some really stupid ones. Simultaneously.

He's anomaly. Because many times I'm like, oh, this guy, he's on point shitting on those white nationalists and those fucking ethno-nationalists. He's so on point about that. And then he's like, he ain't doing anything wrong. And I'm like, yeah. He's really good. He's really good at making those like very core conservative values look really stupid. But then he moves on to like anything involving like trans country, like inter-country politics.

and he says dumb shit immediately. I think he's just doing it. What do you call it when you're like double agent? I think he's just like, I think he's bored. I think he's probably bored. I think he's just like, I'm going to see how far I can push this. Because that's,

I feel like if I were like really smart and I have a bunch of money and I'm like, I'm bored. I got to figure something out. I'm going to, I'm going to be a villain. There was that weird video of him like dumping acid on a starving child.

Yeah. I thought that was a little. I was like, that was a little much. I was like, isn't a sword drawn to my army, army of the pharaohs. and see if you recognize the sample.

Damn, Desi, you really don't like Palskis. They're like Jedi Mind Tricks. One of my lectures got cucked by the leasinger of the pixies. Ben Shapiro moans while his fingers go through a toilet paper. Oh, my God, that's so fucking terrible. Do it, do it. How's he sound? Actually.

That's how he said. He sounded like fucking Joe Rogan. Mr. Pants. How do y'all feel about the final shape and the world's first? Final shape was really, really good. World's First was insane because it was terrible content, but whatever, people watched it. We got Ball of the First Sin, Sponged with Fudders, Andrew Tate instantly giving into millions, even to millions of pieces. As he hits the ceiling fan, we got Jolly O dipshit, soda streams, carbonated piss,

May Thy Low Dripp and Splatter, Cyphergraph, fiberglass, fleshlight prank. Ragged? Please don't let that retarded nigger Read the names again Here we go Too bad, nigga I'm doing it bitch Suck my cock

Nigger We got Hunter Dubois Boys orcs Are sween-coded Ortson I'm not I don't look like an orc man You admitted that In the previous episode

I'm orc like but I don't look like one I'm a decent confederer I want to permanently put orc teeth Like canines And you thaw The tus Yeah I feel like if I look like that, man

I feel like I might have got more pussy. I might have got more pussy. What's going on, bitch? Yeah, come here, yeah, you're one, you're one. If I bite too hard, I'll rip straight through your uve, your labia. Your lamia.

Your pussy's gone. Oops, sorry. Derek, get a glass. He's squirting. Yose Chris, while he held down sweeping all his bite. We got Tom Tom, Our Lord, Green Gay W-M-Y. When September ends, my penis has come too fast.

The homosexual sex is never, it never lasts, gait my butt and come with, come with a cucumber in the end. Oh my God. That's just good song. Lily's asparagus binging piss dealer. You must go to the bodega system. and last but not in least king of haphazard there we go

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