The Snark Tank - #275: Making Bad Predictions

Episode Date: November 8, 2024

ummmmMERCH: http://www.snarktank.shopPatreon: https://patreon.com/TheSnarkTank

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change. Hey, look, he said, Hey, look, he said, hey, look, is it, hey, hey, hey, and, hey, hey, hey. And Tom Sweeney, sit back and prepare for some glazing glory. Hey, everybody, welcome back

to the Snark Tank Pot. It's us. Your boys. It's Sweeney. It's Derek. Over there, it's me. Welcome. Remember, you can support our show

over at patreon.com slash to snarktank. Also, there's merch over at snarktank. Shop, all that jazz. We're recording this on Election Day. Yay.

It's the... What's that Zelda meme? Dawn of the Final Day or whatever the fuck? Like the clock sound goes off in the beginning of Major's Mask.

Yeah, yeah. It's about that time. Yay, I can't wait. I can't wait for Clifford to re-red dollar to become president. Are you okay? You're looking at the monitor a lot. Sorry, I'm just the... Yeah, we're at the surface of the sun.

You guys are in heaven right now. Yeah, we're in heaven. You're at Warner Brothers. So I fix the camera that's on me until something goes wrong, of course. And then now I think we need to just, I think we need to just fix, like, not put it on auto for the Sony now

because it just won't behave. So that's the next thing. Guys, we're almost here. We almost got it sorted out. We got this one. Now we're going to sort up the next one. Just manual. Just put it on manual.

Fix it and then not touch it. Yeah, we're, damn, dude. Because like, I'm surprised I made it to heaven. I'm surprised I'm surprised I feel like I can't just let it. I was like, this is too much. It's fine. It's fine. Is it fine?

Is it fine? Let it be. We're already in. Yeah, there's no point. Nobody gives a shit what this looks like. Yeah. ultimately, it's like the sad reality. Like, we would like it to look better, but like,

nobody cares. You don't care. You actually prefer it this. They prefer it when things are fucked up. I think you're absolutely right. So it's just like, whatever. Don't even, in fact, don't even crop anymore. That's crazy. Just leave the fucking FN arrows.

Okay. Just leave them. This episode, I'm going to fuck it. Who cares? I'm not going to touch it at all. It's election day. I won't even sync the audio. That's crazy.

Yeah, don't sink the audio. In fact, Leave the audio sync exactly like what like a second ahead or like two seconds ahead. See if anybody cares or notice. I think that would drive them nuts. If it was so out of sync, they just make, okay, I guess I'm just not going to watch it versus like it just out of sync. They're going to be like, fuck. Why is it like this?

That's how people will stay longer to try to figure out what's going wrong. Yeah, yeah. More engagement. They'll be like, what's going on with the audio and then we make $5 million. Hell yeah So it's election day Tonight we will be seeing the results Yeah presumably I don't know who the fuck knows at this point

I don't I don't know We should have a very good idea of how it like say in reality who won Yeah By the end of by the end of like six seven we kind of get up you have an idea of like All right this is the way it's going It's fascinating yeah I like how a Trump try to pretend like it hasn't been that way So when he was like no see by now I won. Stop counting. Stop counting now. And I'm like, that's literally never how it's worked. And he's like trying to gaslight people. Every vote after this is illegitimate. And I'll think this is insane. Hasn't it already like isn't, isn't he losing right now? Isn't like right now in the polls? If you want to look, if you want to if you want to be, if you want to be like a freak like like I couldn't help myself. I couldn't help myself because I just kind of have to like watch everything. And yeah.

If you're doing that, odds are it's very hard to, nobody really wants to say it with their chest open, though, because it's just almost like even a jinx thing. Yeah, yeah. People are, it doesn't, even in the swing states, in certain states, Trump should be up so much and he's barely up by a little bit, which is a huge indicator that he's probably fucked.

But you don't really want to say that. It feels weird. Yeah, you don't, yeah, it's kind of one of those things. It's like you don't want to speak things into reality, only they have the universe laughing. Yes. I don't know. I personally, I think Kamala's going to win, but we'll see.

I don't know who fuck knows. Anything can happen, really. That's true. Because we all thought, I thought it, I thought he wasn't going to win the first time. I think that time was a huge. What would you? You thought so? I kind of figured he would.

Well, the thing for me was like she was so unpot. And I knew so many people anecdotally who were like going to vote for Bernie and we're like, well, fuck this guy. What the fuck this party? Yeah. And so, like, I knew so, like, it was so many anecdotally that I'm like, that can't. Normally, I don't give a shit about like anecdotes or like, oh, I'm not going to make like a broad prediction based on like my circle. Right. But it was such, it was so many that I was like, this must be at least somewhat indicative of how a lot of people are feeling.

Right. And it made sense at that time when you didn't really have a record for Trump to go again. That was like, yeah, he's the fucking black. He's like the wild card candidate, whatever. Throw a wrench in the system. it falls apart, fuck these people. Yeah. And it just didn't work out that way.

So it's like, that's kind of why I don't think it's going to happen this time. No. Because we kind of have evidence that it's just like, oh, it's kind of. Plenty of evidence. It's just, it's just business as usual with like a crazy person. A crazy person that, say if he wins again, he has a couple of other Supreme Court justices that he can install.

And then we'd be fucked for the rest of our lives. Yeah. I think the, I think the abortion stuff was a wake up call for a lot of people. I think so. Yeah, I think most people who would have been apathetic about it kind of saw that stuff. I was like, you're like, oh, it was like when the, you know, when you're kicking back in your chair or you're gaming and then some really fucked up shappings. You have to like, you have to like, sit up. Like, that's basically what a lot of people did.

They just locked. They locked the fuck in. Like, oh, shit, this is real. What happened was, I think the biggest problem was the, the, the, the railroading of Bernie Sanders kind of led to the real destruction of the left. So much apathy. I think it led to like this like, oh, the left is gone. They actively spat in the face of their own momentum. which is crazy.

I was another person that specifically I didn't, I didn't vote because of that. I didn't vote in the general shit because I'm like, I, this is not, I can't in good faith cast my vote for this unknown where a lot of people were trying to convince me to say the devil you know is better.

Like Trump's, you know, they unfortunately are correct, but this was such a unpredictable thing. We were wrong with that. It was such an unpredictable thing. Like, that's why I felt so strongly that I'm like, what's the worst this asshole going to do? And I was like, holy shit.

I just, I didn't, I couldn't afford. Who actually, even the people that were, you know, screaming and crying and we thought they were being ridiculous. Yeah, yeah. I mean, it kind of felt legit that they were being ridiculous because it's like, historically, what's the worst that can happen? It's going to be, um, some things are going to be stripped away, but nothing as catastrophic as, or nothing as big and as huge like the shoving all the Supreme Court justice isn't and making things

awful making things really gay I mean what are you gonna do what are you gonna do damn gay but we'll see we didn't believe we were we were making fun of them you were like you guys are stupid and they were like no but they're fucking rainbow

dark colored hair they're still annoying but they were right pull yourself together come on but I think but they were too you're right

but they were also right they're kind of like broken clocks man you know like sometimes sometimes you know sometimes you know sometimes people got a hit. Even like gambling, sometimes the loser is going to hit a jackpot. Yeah, sometimes Matt Walsh makes a funny movie, you know, on occasion. Well, we haven't gotten there yet. Have you seen, by the way, there's a clip of Matt Walsh going around where he's talking about how like, if a friend of his told him that he loved him, like just like if a guy, if a guy friend of his just sat down to him and says, hey, man, I love you. I appreciate you.

He'd be like, um, okay, did you see the game? which is so fucking gay it's crazy it's the gay panic that if he dared to acknowledge those emotions that he'd be exposed as a flaming homo dude him and him and charlie kirk are the most obviously gay people i've ever seen masquerading as if they're not gay and it's frustrating because like people on their side just think they're not gay it's weird you not know they're gay it's like even the women remember for like there was this uh uh uh uh i can't remember their names there was this gun girl she used to do some stuff with info oh yeah katelyn bennett kaelin bennett uh she married some one of the most obvious gay men i've ever seen i remember seeing that yeah yeah um uh there was

he looks like like like he was such a little prim little guy and i was like i risk look man like it's like hey look it's a prim fella you're it's well it's just like Some people, some people aren't. I'm glad he's got his beard, you know? Some people aren't, right? And we're probably labeling some people that are not. No, no. I would bet millions that these people are gay.

Like, because it's, dude, how are you so afraid to be like, yeah, I love you too, man? Like, it is so standard and normal and like not weird at all. Maybe in our parents' generation, that might have been more weird, but even that doesn't know. No, because even my dad, who's like a Vietnam vet wouldn't care about that kind of thing. Right. You know what I mean? So it's just like, he's,

this dude's like way younger. Like, what the fuck are you doing? Like, I don't know. To me, that's just so, that screams like,

well, I can't say I love you because it might sound too genuine. It might give me away. So like, I got, I got, I got,

I got, I got, tell me you love me. Just real quick. Absolutely not. I wouldn't lie. Do it. Do it.

Lie on the show. No, I'm not doing it. But, um, but, but, but,

right. Great bit. Fucking ever. Never mind. Let's move on. Next question. Let's go to the questions. Fuck this. Worst ever, dude. Sweeney's trading card first customer wrote in.

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Are you ready? Are you going to answer it? What's it going to be? Hello, Tom McDonald, Lil-Wain, and Rod Wave. Damn. What is Rodway? Rodway, he's a fat dude. That's a really good singer.

Like, sadly, insanely so. It's good. He's like a teddy bear, actually, like for real. Why are you, Tom McDonnell? I guess I would have to be, right? I guess, yeah, out of all of them. But it's like, what's the correlation, I'm wondering? Yeah, it's kind of like, this is like the girl in the group.

She has to be like Hermione, you know what I mean? It's just like, ah, he's the white one. Yeah, okay. I guess. Fair enough. Simple question. What's the closest you've come to hitting someone else's child as an adult? For me, it was the other day at work when a small white child called me a bitch

and the hard are You know what's crazy Depending on where he's from I believe this I mean I've got racist kids All over the country Especially with Call Duty out now

Oh yeah Oh yeah It's on the way back Yeah We're on the way back To the fun version of the world Oh cool Cool cool

Cool Yeah brought to you by The possible president right Yeah Lean the charge Hey one small little Is that the silver lining that you get OG kind of

Call of Duty vibes Is that the civil lining? I could never give that to him That's so before him It is really Extremely before him That is very true It's ingrained in the culture of America

But like is he making it okay Kind of like how Because basically Twitter's become the Call of Duty lobbies If you know what I mean The Twitter gets crazy sometimes To the point that I'm starting to tweet More wild shit

Because how crazy it is Because what I'm saying We'll just go under the radar of people just being a straight up bigot. Yeah. There's so many Nazi pages. I'm like, what is going on?

It's past the point. It's past the point. It's just funny to me now. Yeah. Like when I just see this stuff, I just laugh. I'm like, yeah, yeah,

of course. Yeah, we're here. It's pretty good. What was the question? I don't even, what was the, what's the closest

you've ever been to hitting another child? I've unfortunately never actually been close. You just fantasize maybe. Yeah, the intrusive thought. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, but it would be funny if, but I've never.

I've never actually had the urge and, like, stop myself where. The dark urge? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Like, I've one time almost, like, my friend, she accidentally hit me in the throat one time. And then that word, I had, like, almost a reaction to where I, like, went and, like, down. I was like, oh, shit. It was just, like, getting hit in the throat is different. It's a thing that, like, it kind of just doesn't sit well with you.

For me, it's the eyes. So I've never been hitting the eyes before. the eyes. That's one thing I'm like, like, makes me so upset. Because I'm so scared of being blind. I'm so, like, petrified of being blind. And I'm like, don't hit me why. I'll fucking eat you. I don't know if I've ever been, like, outside of like a sparring thing. I don't think I've ever been at the eye. Even when I'm smart, I've never been punched in the eyes before. Like, usually they try to avoid that because they get really fuck. You have to be hit by a train in the eyes to go blind, I think.

I'm, like, I mean, I'm pretty blind and I was in a boxing match. And like, I punched in the eyes probably like every fucking week. Yeah, but I'm so scared of the dark that I wash. I shower with my eyes open a whole time. No, you don't. Yeah, I, you think I'm kidding. This dude. So my eyes come out blood red every time I shower.

Like, actually. Because I'm like, I'm scared. You just stare directly at the head. This guy. With the shampoo and everything. The end of my eyes. He just puts it directly in like their fucking eye drops. He takes, he takes, he takes a shower head, puts it flush against his eye,

and then wraps his eyelid around it. and there's water come out of my nostrils, my mouth. I don't think I'm clean yet. You know, it just keeps going. That's why I forget so bad. I'll be washing the memories on my brain. That makes a lot of sense. Yeah, it's a lot of sense.

I feel like I've been, I haven't been close to actually doing it, but there have been, like, certain kids act in public in a certain way where it's just like, it would be so difficult for me not to just throw this kid around, like it's the end of Spider-Man one. You know what I mean?

Like in the, in the, the derelict building. Yeah. I don't know what, like, do, have kids always been like this? Yes,

they have always been like this. No, no, but like I mean like the tantrums. Kids are probably worse once upon the time. I don't, I don't believe that.

I think they, because I think you'd be able in them and stuff so they couldn't react out of it. Yeah, parents used to liquor their kids up, literally.

Well, once in a time, the thing is, we come from a direction with people. I think I probably still would, to be honest with you. People, there's nothing wrong with it.

People straight up would beat their kids in public. I remember seeing it a lot. But no, but that's what I mean. It's like now that that used to happen. And so I feel like kids were just boring. You even see it in like certain, even certain like,

I don't even know if you would call them, you wouldn't call them documentaries necessarily, but like old, like interviews, like on news stations, like with kids. They're just so normal in comparison. I think kids now are this,

I'm around children now and they're just not bad. I think it's the idea of like Being able I know that is a little weird I'm constantly around my nieces And my nephews Yeah okay Okay

I swear I'm weird I hung out with them Literally I was with my Lily's cousin And then I'm there Which I'm their godfather I like how your nieces and nephews Are the example for you

That kids are good Well no no no but I like When I go to their like little soccer games with them Because unfortunately they make the little boy play soccer And he's fucking oblivious Yeah he's just like Yeah it's that shit's so embarrassing He has fun

I hate that shit He has fun. Don't get me wrong. He has a good time. He's smiling and, like, jumping around. All he wants to do is really play. I guarantee you. That's all he wants to.

He doesn't really want to play soccer. He just wants to play something. When he becomes self-aware, he's going to be embarrassed and resentful. It always happens. It always happens. Because they're like, oh, like, I didn't know what the fuck I was doing. I now recognize how all these other parents are laughing at me or were because that's what they're doing. I never thought of it like that when I play Little League.

I never went that deep into it. If you don't like, because they're. are some kids that, you know, they actually understand the sports and then they're like really playing and say when I was like 10 years old, I didn't necessarily understand American football all that well. I still, I knew how to like tackle and block. And then as far as the motherfucker gave us plays a study and I'm not reading that shit. And so like I look like a idiot. Playbooks are so much thicker for us using maybe three. How many plays your team actually used? We used maybe seven throughout the entire school year.

Well, we probably... Maybe seven. We were so, because this was Pop Warner, we were so bad we lost every game. So I don't think anybody was reading anything. So, because me, it didn't matter whether I'm supposed to be, you know, pushing forward for a rush or dropping back for a pass. I would just do the same thing and just rush forward every single time.

Oh, it doesn't matter if I'm supposed to pull and then, and then swing so because we're going to do a sweep or something. I never did anything. Literally, I was a tight end. And my whole position was my play was, I was the, I was the red circle and they were like draw attention away

from the wide receiver that's it that was all my plays where I would literally cut up forward and I would cut away trying to make it so there's never going to be

a point where there two people on a wide receiver and that's all I did that's all I did for a year and I was like this this is the stupidest thing ever but

but for the thing for this is like when they play they're just they're just like kids I don't think kids really are that bad because usually most kids I've known now listen Like you're like, oh, because people talk to them

And I feel like we got yelled at a lot Where you're like, oh, don't just don't do this Suppose to like, hey, don't do this It's like happen to you. And obviously when they're really small, they're too stupid to understand. The whole modern age parenting, you know. I think we need a poison kid's gun.

Yeah, I think so too. I think we need to everybody hack your microwave So that they can turn on with a door open And they just leave them on overnight. And then lay your turn and somehow make a like a like a fucking apparatus Like it's right next to the microwave while it's open I like that

That's good research Like I want to see what happens You can turn it to fucking You know I'm sure Look I'm sure there's a reason Why this makes sense But there's You know you're supposed to put metal in a microwave

You know Because otherwise otherwise it'll go crazy Sure I've done it It's insane You've done that I put I put aluminum foil on a microwave one time I didn't really understand it

Genius Lillino foil It was it was for it moment but like it was in there. I was like it put in the air and then it made the wow. No one told you like a riff. I didn't know at that time. I just didn't know at that time. I just didn't know at that time. I still think about the time of Lily fucking almost killed all this. When? At the fucking. Um, she too. She put a fucking fork in the microwave. Oh my God. Was that it? Olive. No, that was uh at one of the chickens giving Airbnbs that we did. She just like it just didn't it just slipped her mind that there was a fork on the plate or whatever. I don't know. I think she had. I think she had She tried to do it on purpose.

It had to be that. The sound microwave is made when metal is in it is so cool because it sounds like alien. And you're like, whoa, what's about to happen? And then the metal starts shooting sparks out of it. That shit fucking freaks me out. The thing that's crazy though is that like I saw some video of some guy. He's like, you're not supposed to put metal in the microwave, right? What the fuck is this?

And he shows like screws in the microwave. And I'm like, oh. Yeah, weird. I'm sure there's a reason why that makes sense. But like I get why that would be kind of jarring. I don't think there's a screws directly. No, in his microwave, there were like exposed screws. But apparently, apparently it's like a certain degree of metal or like in certain, like specifically in the center, I think is where it can't be.

Yeah, also they're doing things now. I still don't, I didn't trust it because I'm old school. But when I was in Vegas, you could leave this metal tray in. In a world of endless notifications, there could be an important one you're missing. your kidneys may be signaling an SOS. With high blood pressure or type 2 diabetes, your kidneys could be warning you of early signs of damage, which may put you at higher risk for events like heart attack or stroke.

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I'm just like that. I'm sure whatever material it was, yeah, it just doesn't react to it, I guess. I don't know. I just want to leave something. I want to leave like a big ball of like fucking iron, like an iron fucking ball and put it on right way. And it was put it for 10 minutes. Plutonium or like uranium. See what happens? Yeah. And just watch something new be created. And like everybody stops. No one just finishes cooking the metal. Something new, like, like, as if, like, a scientist has never tried this before. You, you, you find something new. You fucking, like, you discover.

So arrogant. I'm going to, I'm going to push the envelope as far as I can. It's like, what, like, what do you mean? Some fucking dumb redneck somehow creates a black hole that swallows the hurt. Oh, shit. Skater, check this out. Watch this. Heard throws his dog into it, and a dog turns into confetti.

I love the idea of a guy just fucking, like a redneck doing what the Hadron Collider can't do. Just through a series of complete, ignorant. What they do. They just throw rocks at each other. But for some reason, the rocks hit at the perfect time. Yeah. And it's just a portable black hole. The exact right part of the exact right Adams happened to collins.

I think about that sometimes about like, just because the scenario is so insane. of just like, what if somebody fell just right that like they split in Adam? You know? That would have happened by now. I know. It would have happened by so long ago. Maybe. But what if the chances are like, say, how many people's there been on the planet?

Think it might be creatures exist. Creatures, that's true. So, but maybe the odds are so slim. It's that, like one in a however many there's existed. It's one in like, what, like 99 quintillion? Yeah, however many things have existed. Because, like, you can't even, like, because you have to shoot an atom at another atom,

make that atom hit the atom, and then explode, like, split itself, and then a chain reaction happens. And, like, imagine you do that with, like, writing something on your paper. Like, you're like, ding, and you just see, you just see light, and you're like, huh?

Well, you wouldn't see it. You wouldn't even register to you. It would just have it used you'd be gone. But. What if it registers are you exactly? Would you feel like, oh, shit. And you see an atom splitting. You're like, cool, man.

Cool. I mean, cool, man. What I'm going to do? What I even understand. Understand what I'm saying. What are we going to roll and duck? You get eye frames at the right moment and you roll through the explosion. Dude, I remember playing Sony video because it was a kid that I really thought, I thought eye frames had, there was something to it.

You know what I mean? Like I thought like you could theoretically like eye frame your way out of certain, at a certain things. Okay. Like dark soul rolling into a bat. I remember being a little kid and like trying to dodge a baseball at the right time, but I didn't remember. I wait I like I waited for it to get close I was like four or something the idea that I was even thinking about eye frames at all

in the first place is weird yeah double jump really I think it well well double jumping is obviously not real well it was obviously not real duh but like everything did it from like until I was like seven and I was like I didn't why have I not seen anyone do this the thing that fuck me up the thing that fucked me up about that is because I I feel like I thought I saw like a squirrel double jump one

I mean, maybe you saw the one with the flying and then so went, and then, and then, Oh, the one that got executed in New York or whatever. You didn't hear about that? You didn't hear about the squirrel getting fucking caught, drawn and quartered? Yeah, they executed a squirrel in New York. Who did? I don't know. The fucking state.

Yeah, I think it was, it's actually a much bigger deal than what we're making it sound. Is it? What are you talking about? I feel like it's as big a deal as I'm making it. Something very elite, like the. And the squirrel's killing was on a very, very illegal means. What happened? I forgot.

I don't know exactly. I heard about it. It was like one of the. So basically, like, let me set the stage. There was like, I guess some guy in New York, he had a pet squirrel, which I guess, I don't know. Are you not allowed or something? I don't think. You can't do that or some, I don't know.

There's some, something, some bullshit. And so they were like, you have a pet squirrel. We're going to kill it. And then they did it. That's all that was? Yeah, yeah. Yeah. They said they'd drawn cordered it.

That's crazy. it with metal. They put back. They rise in an aluminum foil and microwave them. Oh, man. They shanked him. They brought them out into the yard. But wait, what's?

It was like, apparently they did it on like really illegal means. What does that mean? I don't remember how it was. I just watch it. I follow the Sonic says things where like Sonic says like some fucking really unnecessarily fucking philosophical shit about like very situations. Yeah.

And like he went on like a tangent about it. And I was like, this is like more serious than it. way supposed to be. It sounds crazy to me. They shouldn't have executed him, man. He's a little squirrel. The world is crazy, then. I guess.

Yeah, I don't know. I saw a lot of people being like, this is why Trump's going to save the squirrels or whatever. They were turning into public. You saw that? Yeah, I saw, like, J.D. Vance was talking about it. And I have to say, look, if Trump was president and a state killed the squirrel while he was president,

I also wouldn't give a shit I just I don't know man Maybe I'm callous And maybe I'm too desensitized to squirrels Living in like cities my whole life But like I don't know I can't muster up the care

It's such a weird thing to even like It's a dog If it's a dog that's one thing To me I just it's it's You know it's all insane to me But at the same time To me it's crazier to eat

You know because there's tugging at the people's heartstrings Oh well we'll fix the squirrel problem It was like when Mike Pins was like, they're not going to take away our meat. And I was like, because, you know, that was the whole, that argument that they're going to turn everything in a lab grown meat. Oh, yeah. And then so he started like tugging at their heartstrings.

And I'm like, shut the fuck. You're not going to do anything. Shut the fuck out. It's already happening. Please shut up. I think it's been happening. Yeah, they're just certain. It's been happening, my guy.

There are just certain animals that I can't, it's difficult for me to muster up any, like, it's like, it's like, I don't give a fuck. Your goal. I remember I had to earnestly pretend like I gave a shit that my nephew. used fish died. I had to be like, hey, it's okay, bud. And in my mind, I'm thinking this thing is useless. I think it was probably, this one was better off dead.

Frankly, because it had mold growing on it. It had like the fucking fuzz. You didn't take care of this. You didn't give a shit. What are you talking about? I'm sad. I guess the whole idea is to just empathize with them. It's not that, it's like say a Sue Hulk, for example. Her, her grandma just passed away recently. Yeah. I don't know her

grandma at all. Right. I feel for her. You know what I'm saying? Yeah, I can empathize with a grandmother. Well, I'm not empathizing. I'm empathizing. I'm I'm besides with her that I feel bad that so when she like died. Not that like because I personally don't know her at all. So I feel nothing about her grandmother. Of course. Of course.

Yeah. But like I guess what I think you're just like fuck that fish, man. Well, no, because what I think about it is like because I had a, I had fish growing up. You know what I mean? I had fish growing up. I remember having goldfish getting goldfish from the from the fucking fair or whatever. Yeah. When it died, you fucking got like a hockey stick and just.

No. He just fucking finished it off. I remember when it died. You put it in a microwave wrapping. Yeah. You foiled. You've had Found a squirrel

Wrapped it up With the squirrel A little bit See what the fish Squirrel would do Exactly You put a squirrel On a fucking

Aluminum foil Cross And then put it Inside the That is so crazy It's But you have Me now

Judgment But you've had fish Right And you've had Real pets Also So Let me ask you

When your fish died Do you remember Um Yes, one of them, but I was really, it was like a fundamental moment. It was like, how does the first time anything of mine died? Really? And it sucked, but I was just like, oh, it's a fish.

Yeah. That's what I'm saying. Even as a child, like, I remember being like, oh, it's dead. That sucks. But think of the, it felt like, like a, like my Game Boy ran out of battery. You know what I mean? Where it was just like, damn. Did you have that wonder, though?

You can see some kids when they're around like animals. It's like the world is blowing up to their little minds. I guess. They're like, look, that's a thing going around. That's like moving. I get it. I feel like people would feel more for fish specifically if they had emotions. Oh, yeah.

I think the reason we're so... The fact that it's just always like this. Fish just looks stupid. I do think the fact that they are so emotionless and that they can't make sounds is why we're so okay doing things to them that we would never do to anything else. Like I saw a video of them. It was like the whale and the fish, right? I love whales. I don't give a fuck about any fish that exists.

Well, dude, that's exactly... But whales show emotion all the time. Yeah, whales can scream. A whale can be like, ow! Yeah. You know? Dude, I went to freaking SeaWorld and the whale... Fuck.

When I was at SeaWorld for my birthday, I remember seeing the whale. The whale came up to the thing. You know, when they, like, come up on like the hind part, they, like, look at things. And they looked at me directly for a way too long. And I was just like... It's challenging you. Yeah. What are you doing a punk-ass black bitch?

What did you in the whale? Look at you. like, damn. I'd be like, how did you learn that? Are you making fun? Are you calling me that? That's crazy. That's fucking I would go touch. I would have touched the way if they let me, but that's also like, do Germans, do Germans, Heil taxis? I think they used to. They hail taxis, and I think that's where Hale came from. And then, well, technically, well, I guess that's what, well, that's right? You'd assume that's where hailing a taxi comes to.

Oh, no, no. No. No. No. Hale is. His weather, stupid. Stop, stop, stop, stop being here. I mean, I know the salute was, Hitler is so an original. He stole everything. Oh, yeah, he's a fucker. What a bitch.

Like, he played homage to everything, but like in the worst way, you know? He ruined literally everything. It was why I was just watching some. He really did. I was watching a street interview and some guy was trying to say, well, it's just, even though it literally made no sense because he was trying to make that analogy, like the Confederate flag. He's like, well, they ruined it.

It was like, no, it was never ruined. That's literally what it was for. Are you talking about the guy who calls it a swasticker? Swastika, the swastaker guy. So you saw that guy. That video's crazy. And I'm like, well, I don't... Well, I don't...

Actually means peace. That's not what that means. It's not what that means at all. And he's like, so would you not mind people wearing a swastika? He's like, nope, I don't care. They're actually like... What's crazy about it is that they are actually different symbols. Like, actually, like, they're like very similar, but like, there's a difference between the Hindu symbol of peace and the swastika.

Like, it's pretty obvious. It's called, but I'm not that simple is called. but like it's people like that are people that are just so wildly unempathetic like so like to the point that like they're not even sociopathic because they're not progressive enough in their lively sociopaths yeah they're just absolutely empathetic like yeah that symbol never hurt me it's like yes well isn't but that symbol is super malicious it is extremely malicious symbol but also isn't it not even like I don't know this for sure but I heard this and I didn't bother look it up because they don't really care enough about it right but like I heard somewhere that

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To learn more, visit Detect the SOS.com today. Confederate flag either. I think that's true. I think there's another flag. Yeah, like the rebel flag and the Confederate flag are actually different things. If I'm not mistaken, I heard that too. I could be wrong now. And people, yeah, like, I remember, I don't know. People in the comments can. I can't say for sure about that.

All I know is that the one that we know for sure, just like any of the rebel flag. And the thing that annoys me so much, even about those fucking statues were they were all erected well after. You know, so where they try to act like, oh, this was this was a symbol of this. I'm like, no, bitch. No, stop, please. I do think they should be put in museums. Like, I don't think they should be destroyed.

They don't need to be destroyed. They just not need to be fucking put on display. Like, we have some, we have, I think Rasputin's penis is in a museum or something. Yeah, it is. Or something like that. Yeah, something like that. So there's like things that it's just important history. It doesn't need to be destroyed.

I also feel, I don't know if I, I feel like, I don't know if this is a hot take or not. We should stop building statues. I, well, especially, uh, B. There's something going on right now. Have you seen D. Wade? There's something going on with... That is so disrespectful to him, bro. And it was crazy.

I was crazy. He def- I was like, don't fucking piss on me and tell me it's sparkling fucking apple cider, dude. This guy, D-Wade went and he, I mean, if it was, I'd be fine. But he was like, oh, he tried to defend it. And I'm like, bro, don't fucking lie. You're lying to everyone in pretending like you like this shit. Wait, so what's the situation for people who aren't caught up with the D-Wade?

Statues. I mean, everybody remembers the Christiano on a Rinaldo one. Everybody remembers that one. That statue is probably the worst one in recent memory or something's going on it and I feel like it's like a conspiracy

in a way that like if I were a statue builder, I would purposely fuck things up because it's hilarious and now all the attentions on my work. Right. Because we've seen statues throughout history. We've seen people sculpt. People are fucking phenomenal. There's also people that just put things in mold

casting and it'll just look like it's supposed to look. So I don't understand. Maybe I sound ignorant because maybe it's much more difficult than I think it is. But I, to my opinion, I don't think it is. So there's these statues that we've seen that look pretty fucking good. And then there's Dwayne Wade, who's, you know, a legend in the NBA. And his statue is probably, because not only is it just, because most statues are just

like stoic, right? But he's like going like, ah! Like, it looks like he's like in pain. It's supposed to be when he was. He's getting a fucking colonoscow. It's when he won the first championship, you know? But it's really bad. It's not good.

Cristiano Ronaldo, I think, is still worse. But, like, his is just a bust, I think. It's just a bust. I don't think it's the entire one, yeah. That's really bad. Like, I saw that for the first time on Sacred. I didn't even know about it because Colin was like, do you ever see that fucking statue?

And I was like, no. And I couldn't believe how bad it was. He looks so retarded. It's so funny. Like, he looks, his eyes are so close together in the statue to it. He just, he looks so stupid. He looks like a melted. like a melted

Man and two sod's whack statue I think it doesn't look like Christina or not what's so great is if you if you type in Deweighed now like

the search engines just ruined with with like the statue yeah he's he's immortalized as um let me see if I can

that looks like like fucking like that guy oh my God like that is not him even remotely that looks like it sounds that looks like

fucking dark side that's that That is not at all fucking... Like his fucking shit just got fucking shattered off. He's like summoning something. You know what I mean? Like that looks like a still from an action movie.

What the fuck is going on? I was like, wow, that's not... It looks closer to, um, uh, there's a M.MA legend named Chuck Liddell. It looks close. Like, this is, this is so bad. The best one, though, is, um, George St. Pierre. His looks like Obama. And so that was like a huge...

Let me show you it. I'm sorry. What did you say? Do you know the conspiracy theory about like, you know the, what is it? Is it the Disney Hall of Presidents that has it? Like, who has that Hall of Presidents, like, ride with animatronic presidents? Is that? You know what I mean?

Is that like a Disney World thing or something? I don't know if it's Epcot maybe? I really don't know. I have no idea. I have no knowledge of Disney World at all. I haven't been to Disney related anything in fucking forever. But there's like a conspiracy theory that, like, they have to, so they have to build animatronics for each of the presidents. essentially.

There's a lot of animatronics. Right. And I think like for the 2016 election, they had one and they just assumed Hillary was going to win. So they like built a Hillary one. And then like Trump won. And so they just like quickly reconfigured it and put different hair and like different clothes. 100%.

I remember that. So like you look at it. You look at his animatronic and it's fucking distressing because it just looks like both of them. Yeah. Yeah. That one's crazy. All right.

Let me show you. Here's a picture of George St. Pierre. Okay. Now I'm going to show you his statue. George St. Now you tell me, he's probably the goat, actually. A lot of weight division in the UFC.

Oh, yeah. It's, uh, Kamar Usman was just, just, oh, man. What does UFC say? We argue about this all day. What does UFC stand for? I actually don't know. The ugly fucking cunts. Okay.

And then there's just a bunch of ugly fucking cunts just slapping each other. What is it? Like ultimate fighting core or something? Close. Ultimate fighting. Oh, really? Uh, champs. No.

No, championship. Yeah. Champions. Yeah. Go Hold on Let me It is

Yeah He would have guessed it Probably tomorrow He would have said He would have said Cleet I guess I didn't see the bit

I was just trying to Help someone out That didn't Sweetie Suiti executes bits Like New York State Executes pet squirrels Officially

Now you tell me It's like No prejudice You tell me this doesn't look Like Obama This looks like Fucking Obama

It looks like It looks like a fusion of them. But it does not look like him. It does look like, oh, my God, this definitely looks like me. It looks like Barack Obama. That looks like if Barack Obama was more white, you know what I mean? Like if he got a little bit more of his mom's jeans. Well, let me be clear.

I will fight you. I was born here. I will beat the absolute ever fucking. Couldn't cut it as a blind man. Couldn't know it as a poor man stealing. Did you guys? fail no nickel back November Well, what is that?

So apparently... Apparently, you just failed it. You just failed it. You can't reference them. So I think that's the same thing because the vibration is technically music. So you can't listen to nickel back in November. And I think the way that sound works, right, I think that counts. Damn. I think that counts.

That's not fair. That we lost now because of him? I think so That is a little term I didn't know I didn't know Restart Now that's

Now that's my I feel like that Now I just want to sing their songs That's my interpretation though Because some people might disagree And say no You have to actually listen To the song to fail

I think I actually did fail though already Yeah You probably Just by proxy I think I heard Into the night A couple days ago

Which is not Nickelback necessarily But it's not Not also See because look Some people is putting um because it's so confused i know what you mean but it's like it's not nickelback but it's not nickleback you know the song hero right um some people said listen to that was feel that's why i feel

like it's like anything adjacent to it like since it's only chad's in that song that would have been that line would have been broken because i watch spider man every thanksgiving oh it's a thanksgiving movie oh interesting yeah i don't oh yeah it is blaring in my head and i'm having a problem right because i've never thought about that song really all right well let's Someone told me. It's over. We lost again. Well, I just did the Josie Scott part.

Does that count? Oh, yeah, I don't know. I'm so high. All right, all right. How can that be? I didn't know that was even a thing. It's like, no nut November. Yeah, no, no, November was too old school.

Yeah, that one's fucking. Or nonstop nut November. No, November. Mr. Hyde to that. Dude, no, no November. I think by the end of it, you're fucking killing people. I did it when I was like, Like 19.

It was just, it was gross. Stupid. I wasn't getting pussy. So that's why I was it. It was like, like, oh, I'm just, I'm not doing this. You're lame or gay. Educational purposes, did you film your nut after, uh, like, for that for the, like, you couldn't just see how far and you measured it like it was shot pudding and shit.

A pale right in front of me. And then it just, uh, a pale is crazy. It's like somebody dumps a bunch of paint in a bucket. But now, no, wait, wait, hold on, a bucket, a pot or a pale. Oh, my God. That is one of the oldest jokes we have. So we're talking about things that are, what, are they all bowls or are they cups? What?

At what line is something no longer a, so a cup. A cup has a handle on it. Not always, right? Not necessarily. A mug has a cup. A mug has a handle always. A mug has to be a cup. A mug has a cup with a handle.

Yes. So at what point does a cup become a bowl when it becomes wider? When it's wide enough. It's wider than taller, right? That's a bowl. Yeah, I think cool. Because, well, I mean, you can have a tall-ass fucking wide, a bowl, but it just has to be very wide, right? Yeah, it has to be more wide than tall.

Yes. Okay, so at what moment does it become a pan? A pan has handles, and the wideness kind of correlates with the tallness, right? Is a pan a extremely wide mug? Is that what is he just like, like you just flattened it out? Okay, okay. Is that what that is? So then at that moment, when does it become a bucket?

When has a hand one has a um A bucket has an overhand Yeah yeah I think like that's the only universal one we can all agree that a bucket has to have Because there are buckets without that But that's such a useless tool That's just a big cup It's just a very big cup

Now when does it become a pale A pale is a bucket Is that this no Overhandle A pale is a bucket that has the curve around it curving at the top That you can pick it has a Like the lip, you know? I guess.

That's what a pale is, right? Doesn't every pale has to have the lip that you can like pick it up the rounded exterior? I guess. Can I drink tea out of a pan? You can drink tea at anything as long as it can hold tea. You can drink tea out of a rectum if you wanted. Because at that moment, because at that moment, what did you say? You could drink tea out of a rectum if you wanted.

You ever see that video with the cereal? You had a cup out of the asshole or the cereal? The cereal at the asshole. The cereal at the asshole. Somebody interviewed somebody. What was I watching? What the fuck could you be watching to be reminded of anything by this? Sorry, it was your mom's house.

It was this was years ago. They interviewed a only fans couple that they eat food out of his partner's ass, like the chick. So her ass was so gape that he would eat out of her. Didn't see it. I understood. You know how there's some things that when it's described to you? You're like, I know exactly what it is. Yeah, you get it.

I don't see that. The girl with the mental son her pussy. Oh, that's, that's, dude, that's crazy. That video was so crazy because she did it. And then she looked like she didn't expect it to be as bad as it was. And I'm like, Miss. She probably didn't. That's what I don't understand that shit.

It's gonna not be a good idea no matter what. I do really like that video of that guy that was like cold maxing with the dry ice and fucking like. Oh, no, he's gonna, he is shorting in his life. His life is getting. Oh, yeah. He had the bright ice, the sprite and in all of the listerine strips. He put the dry ice in the sprite And the sprite was misbehaving

The Sprite was throwing a tantrum That's funny So what do you think is the worst From a human perspective The worst ingredient of that The dry eyes that You think so? I feel like it's actually the Listerine

Oh he Listerine first No he had the strip And he ate Then he just the amount of Listerine Like dry ice is crazy And you're not supposed to be around that really at all You're supposed to fucking touch it It burns your skin.

Yeah, yeah. But for some reason, like, I remember, I remember taking one Listerine script and being like, this is strong stuff. And he took, like. He bought a whole thing of it. Like a lot. That video is insane. The video's called, like, him, what is it called?

I don't know. What is it? I don't know. I guess cold maxing probably makes sense. It's a pretty good guess. If I put that in, maybe it would show up now because since a lot of people, I like, he was doing too much. There's so far, I'm such a, I'm not a hipster, but a lot of times, like,

I feel like it. But then there are certain things that I'm so happy when it catches on. Like maxing? Maxing, I'm actually very happy. Remember the video I sent this weekend of the guys saying he's Negro maxing? Yeah. And like, you never commented our group chat. And even you were like, I don't like this.

I remember that. Derek is like we have a group chat with all of our friends in a general area. And Derek is always silent. He rarely says anything. But when he saw that, he was like, dude, I don't like this. I didn't like that. that everything was on par except for he had

Raising Cains. Yeah. No, you can't be nigga Maxie with raising Cains, like at the very least, if he would have gotten Popeyes, KFC or something, I would have been like, okay, fine. I have like KFC in a while. But like, there's no reason. Raising, yeah, KFC is just, it's, Pop-more chicken, I will say it's still, like,

Popcorn chicken is like their, like, Burger King Chicken fries where it's like, it's not, it's still good. It's not, I will say they have one thing that, but if you know how to make it, it's actually, your own sauce. It's called a Georgia gold. That's fire sauce. So basically it's like huddy barbecue,

um, uh, mustard. And I think it's just those two and then a little extra things, but it turns it like gold. Yeah. It's fucking delicious. It's the only thing I've ever liked,

uh, it's not like Casey made it, right? It's just, but they had it there one time. And I was like, this is actually really good sauce. I'm like you have seen a while.

Okay. There's really no reason to do. It's just like, what do you got? All right. No, sorry. I had to mentally like, unhunger myself.

Oh. Yeah, I'm excited. I'm gonna go to, I'm gonna drop off my wife's best friend at the airport. And so now I get to get some good L.A. chickens.

I'm super excited for that. Like, I hate going down to L.A., but I have to do that. So, yeah, you might as well. Yeah, I'm gonna do that. And now I have to get some fucking new studio headphones because my audio technicas

you know, they're all plastic and I like lightly set it down like with the ears facing down. And this little piece, the cheapest $150 headphones pop and now it's just

hanging by wire and I'm like oh cool it's unfixable even duct tape when you put it in place it's still kind of leaned up and then you need it covered otherwise the sound

you can't it's where you're gonna get them from you're gonna go in person to like yeah so I was gonna just buy something like I'm gonna stop by a guitar center or something oh yeah

at least why I'm while I'm down there might as well yeah I'm so mad like I'm gonna get metal headphones. I got to get, I got a new speakers from my computer

because I realize, like, while I was recording some of the shows for Sacred, like I noticed that it would be like, I would get like,

ch, in the headphones. I was like, oh, fuck, my headphones are fucked. That was my first thought. And then I switched the audio input from the real tech

to the fucking focus right. And it was perfectly fine. I was like, oh, damn. So it's like, and to be fair, I've had that for like ever.

Oh, right. So now they're starting to go. I have to bring my computer because I still have the fucking piece of the headphones stuck in the jack you still have that he says it anything about it

I just put it I use the USB like with Derek said I used the USB that's fun of the headphones yeah I mean I understand but that was always a temporary solution you it has I know and I'm like I have to listen to my everything with my headphones on so if I'm watching a video on my phone I can't like make my better I can watch a video on like my computer

I can't get up and make my bed or anything and I'm like I really can't understand how you even did that in the first place I've literally literally Derek saw me do it I like moved my hand and I was like It was comically It was the timing was comical It's like as soon as your your webcam turned on

You broke your shit And you're like oh I was like oh cool The thing is that it's a forged in case So I have to go send it back to I buy power They have to take the case off And then put a new one on there And it's such a fucking waste of time

Yeah you fucked up I'm gonna do it though but Let's do it It's got on this next question here Coming on his skin The gaping will not yield road in. He says, please talk about how much

Kai Lang sucks. So I do want to talk about this because there's been some weird. So do you Are you specific? Well, are you familiar with what's going on? No. So there's like a lot of videos Are you talking about like, oh go go go ahead. Well, there's a lot of videos that have, I've seen a number of videos like on Twitter and like elsewhere of just

Troy Baker talking about how much he hated Kyle Leg and I don't know if this is old information. Kyle Lang is exactly. Kai Lang is in Massive Act 3. He's like the The only agent that's important, Mass Effect 3. The character? Yeah, he's like the ninja, cyber.

He's, uh, he's, um, uh, the, the elusive man's assassin. I know who he is. Okay, yeah. He's, he is, shitty anime personified. Like, with the way that he behaves. Go ahead. Well, no, I mean, there's just a lot of videos of like,

Baker was, like, how much he hated him? Yeah, Troy Baker. Well, there's like a couple. It's like three separate things now of like, there's, like, there's like a kind of like a cameo looking thing. There's one of him and Nolan North kind of doing like a watchmojo watch party of like worst characters or whatever and like that comes up or whatever. And then there's another just interview with him with somebody else.

And every video is him talking about basically apologizing for Kylang or being like, oh man, I'm so excited to be part of Massifax. And then they give me this character. And I was like, oh, man. And it was like as an actor, it was great. But as a fan, it was just like, ah, it sucks. Which is hilarious. Because I remember playing the original Last Effect 3 and I remember being like,

yeah, I don't really like him. Like, I don't care that much about it. The way that I saw him was they made him really cheap and annoying so that when you kill him, it feels good. Yeah. That was all I was thinking because I'm like, yeah, this guy objectively is just like he's, he's, he doesn't really fit. He's kind of like the way that he even taught. He reminds me of, so I watched Spawn every once in a while, 1997 Spawn. And Martin Sheen, I don't know if I mentioned this.

Dude, he's so evil. He's so crazy. He talks like this. yeah now we're gonna i was like martin sheen's a phenomenal actor and then he gets in a fucking spawn like he's fucking great and then he was like now we're gonna do this and i'm like bro what the fuck he's villain nasty yeah yeah and kailane like has this like yeah i'm gonna this like the way that he talks and i'm like people don't talk like that

even when people are evil they don't like they talk like normal they like to me it's for children, you villain Max, right? Yeah, so I point out like, this is a bad guy. And like, so I guess somebody told maybe that was the direction that was fed to? Maybe, yeah. Because I'm like, oh, make sure you get a, lean into it. Like, lean into it. Don't, don't, don't, don't give this guy.

I don't understand. Don't give this guy any subtlety or believability. Do it as if you're doing a Saturday morning card. Do it as if you're a villain on like Lloyd in space or something. Yeah, I missed all the discourse around I missed any of that It wasn't that crazy It was just it was I just thought it was weird that it was coming up so much on my feed I wish I saw that

Yeah, but it's it's funny The whole time he's just like oh man I always wonder about that though The people that um Play characters they have to hate Yeah you reluctantly like you want to be a part of a project And you got you're like Well imagine I'm gonna do my best

Imagine being given Micah You're like If you are especially if you're like like a really good person. Yeah. That reminds me of um the guy that played a Taiwan Lanister. Oh yeah. Game of Thrones. Like he's such a gentleman that he always had to like go to um Peter Dinklage. Yeah. And be like, I'm so sorry. Like you know, I'm so, because like that he played his father. Right. Yeah. And he always had to be like, I'm so sorry. Like, because he's being such a massive dick to him. Same thing. The guy that plays, um,

that plays auto. That plays auto. In, uh, in house of dragons. Yeah. Oh. Alex's dad. He's like a really nice, respectful dude, and it's like, I got to play a cunt. It's very interesting. That, um, it's very interesting. The, I guess apologizing is the interesting thing because everybody understands what's happening. Yeah, but you're still, you're still doing it, you know, you know, it's like, it's like,

it's like Leo and freaking what you're calling in Jango. Like, I know, I know that Leo was like, he's probably not a bigger person. Jimmy Fox's point, but this is fucking hilarious. But like, you're like, I. I'm still saying this. Like, there are going to be reporting forever of me

saying this fucked shit. Sure. With no context. Yeah, yeah, yeah. People are going to use, people are going to use my character

to promote really fucked up shit and I'm going to be like, well, yeah, there is kind of a degree of like, you are still doing it, you know? It's like the guy,

it's like the Setschuan sauce, Rigged Morty guy at McDonald's. Right. It's like, even like, oh, he's just doing it ironically. He's like,

yeah, but you're doing it. You can't like, oh, she caught like, What are you, Jared Fogle? I did it ironically. Like, I wish he caught a bullet, like, in this candy.

Like, that guy is such a, imagine working there. Imagine how busy that shit is. And that fucking absolute spasitroid comes in and does that. Sure. Same guy. Oh, same guy. Yeah. Like, I would have, I would have, uh, look, they probably really need their job

with the working on McDonald's. Look, I would have hired someone to come and get him. Yeah. I would have been like, yo, guys, come get right now. I bet there were so many, like, irredeemably annoying people with the Cravy Paddy. stuff. I don't know if that's still going on. I think so. I passed by the Wendy's. I think it still had the promotion.

I want to do fire up those girls. Yeah. Reb up those friars. Reb up those friars. I was going to walk in. The way he walks in is so burned into my brain because he just walks in with his hands out and I'm like he's so happy. Can you see we're closed? Reb up those friars.

He talks like like an excited almost like 1950s advertisement. That's what gets me about. Like a radio guy, you know what I mean? He's so excited, dude. I would see if I could find the, uh, yeah, wrap up those briars. I want to see if I can find this classic, uh, play on that one.

I doesn't look it. Doesn't like, it doesn't let it get in my. I wanted to go so bad, but I was also like, I don't want Wendy's. Yeah, that's kind of the thing that I did check out the, uh, the Adams family thing. What was that? It was like a, it was like a purple, it was like a purple bun whopper with like, uh, like cum. Yeah, come. Yeah.

What's, Gomez, what are the names? I don't know. Is Adam? Andrews? Andrew Adams? Andrew Adams?

It's, Is it the same universe? I think it's Gwant. Gwant? It's Gwant Adams. It's Amy Adams. It's, Amy Adams,

it's a porn star, no, that's just an actress. Oh, yeah, I know who that is. Yeah, yeah. She's lowest in fucking man of steel. I'm sure, yeah, Amy Adams. That's fine. They're the same.

They're both actresses. Yeah. You're the same feeling. And it came with like, I think fucking Gomez's chiro fries or something. Oh, it's chiro? They're pretty good, actually. He's Mexican. It's not bad at all.

He's chiro? It's not bad. A little bit of Rochata on the side? Orchap. He is Mexican. He is. Bring on guests. I remember bringing that up one time when I was younger.

People were like, no, he's not. I'm like, his name is Gomez. He's not. He's not. It is wild. Like, I remember having that same conversation with people. They were like, he's not Hispanic. And they're like, Gomez?

That's his stupid. That's his first name. That's not his last name. Is it his first name actually? It's Gomez, yeah. I thought like it was in the show, but I thought it was like he had a first. Gomez Adams. I thought it was like his last name and then he married.

He was so obsessed with the woman that like he just took his last name and put it first because who he was before it didn't matter. That might be true. I don't remember. I don't. I really just built up a lot of that lore in my head for no reason. I have no history with the Adam's family at all. He loves his wife so much.

She's kind of fine. Don't get me wrong. But, like, still, like. Yeah. Do you see that show? Was it, was it Wednesday where, like, it's Louise. What was his name? Oh, my God.

Oh, yeah, I know. Yeah. Is it? Is it? Luis Guzman. For, uh, what is he? For Gomez in the, in the, in the, Adam, in Wednesday, the Adams family. Is, is, is, is that him?

I think, can see him? I haven't seen. I haven't seen. Yeah, let's look it up. I, I, I, I, I, that. I'm sorry. I don't know if I'm being racist or not. Go ahead.

Because with all due respect, I just saw, I saw an ugly Mexican man and I thought Louise Guzman. What do you mean, racist? I think he's objectively an ugly man. No, but he's like the only, like, he's the only, I don't have to describe it. He's the only one of them? He's like the ugliest Mexican man I've ever seen.

That's so mean No disrespect The ugliest famous Mexican man That is true Yeah yeah Mexican's gonna get whiteified Like quite like some of the other ones man Yeah because he has

He has the The caveman jeans He got the Pocahanna jeans He's absolutely a Neanderthal Just like come on dude Like that is a That is a Niaanda Salito right there man

There's something about him That like he's so not good looking that he's almost handsome in the other direction you know oh that's like ugly that's like what is it that they call it like ugly hot or something is it's like it's almost stoic sometimes but then you see this you're like like oof like a lion almost you know he looks normal he looks he looks adorable there like he looks like a pug almost and like

that's like ugly would you kiss him I wouldn't but like I would hug him and be like ah you know like he looks like he looks like it like an uncle that would be like nice you're a racist homopophobe yeah okay okay sure yeah yeah you wouldn't kiss you wouldn't kiss Mexicans aren't a race. You wouldn't kiss this beautiful Mexican man. Mexicans aren't a race.

Don't give them that. Don't give them that. Don't give them that. Damn, bro. I mean, fine. It's so strange for Mexicans. Like,

what race are you? And it's like, I don't know. I mean, I'm going to type in ugly Mexicans why I read the next question. That is crazy. Michael basketball Jordan,

basketball Peterson wrote in. Nice. Says, Hey, y'all. What's your most obvious instance of, in media? Of a drop in

quality following, I really fuck my throat up coffee. A drop in media, a drop off in quality following an individual's departure from the production team, whether it be a writer, developer, producer, or a musician leaving the band. Mine was when drummer of Avenged Sevenfold, when the drummer of Avenged Sevenfold passed away. They put on an album every other year from 2000 to 2010. But since his death in 2010, they have only written three albums, including an

album worse than their shitty try hardcore metal uh metalcore debut album unsurprisingly when i looked at their credits he was credited as the main writer for a lot of their catalog um so i i'm gonna have to so i i agree to disagree first of all he talks about try hard and stuff like they were very much OC um hardcore uh punk first when they first start off yeah they're from they're from they're from they're from the um i think the huntington beach area if i'm if i remember correctly. And that was kind of how it was before. And then it kind of just, you know, evolved into metal core. It's an okay album. You know, it's, I wouldn't call it try hard at all. It's, it's from the area. Like, it's just one of the things that if you grew up in the area,

you'd understand the vibe of the music. Not for everyone, though. And after the music, after, say, Rev died, I don't, so, like, Rev did write a lot of the riffs. Like, say, a song that a lot of people like it's called Almost Easy from their, uh, um, they're from their, uh, critical acclaim album or whatever the fuck. And that was, they showed him like writing, you know, so that's why a lot of times, you can tell when the drummer writes a lot of stuff because the drum fills and a lot of things and grooves will fit the riffs because it just, it's all written in his head. So, um, then you can tell a noticeable difference when things are written afterwards. But there was a time where I wasn't really listening to them because the albums were just like, okay. But, uh,

They had the guy is this guy, Brooks, who's from, he was in Bad Religion. Brooks joined Bad Religion. They did like a warp tour together, them and a Vin Seventhfold. And then Brooks joined a Vin Seventhfold. And their album, The Stage, which came out in 2016, if I remember correctly, is a phenomenal album. And the drumming's great. It's a great album. So it's one of those things where there was these in-betweens that a lot of people kind of like their,

but the drumming was very basic because I think they had somebody else just writing whatever. I don't really listen to that means that much, but 2016 that came back, Brooks came back or came in and wrote with that album, I think they're in a great position

except for this weird album that they just dropped last year. I think it's so strange artists making music for that long, you know? When artists, it's weird to me. Like, if you can do it, you can do it. I love it. That's the whole thing.

That right there. Because obviously like A number one, Nas. Nas went from like he had, I had obviously Illmatic Still Maddo Good albums, as was written was a pretty good album But then he took a long break He made an album with Kanye, Kanye completely fucked him over, made him have his worst album by far

And then like he took a break off And in 2020 to 2023 Released three of the best hip hop albums like ever So it's like if you got it, you got it You're talking about Uncle Adams? No Yeah, yeah, okay He doesn't know what he's talking about yes he is

He doesn't know what he's talking about He doesn't know what he means That is fucking crazy I mean Well yeah It depends on what you have You know But like

Who if I can think of something That dropped in quality I can think of something Immediately Where it's like When Dan Harmon left community It was night and day dude It was unbelievable

That's a good point Yeah Season 3 right Yeah season 4 right Yeah season 4 Like he was He was all through season 1 through 3

And then 5 and 6 And because they hired him back because it was that catastrophic. You know how bad the show has to be for you to be like, we fired you, but like you got to, that's like, you got a sweetenet down.

It's literally, it's literally happening with Disney with James Gunn, where they were like, where they fired James Gunn over those tweets from like 2009. Yeah, yeah. And they were like, we need you back.

It sucks. Please help. Please help us. That's so we modeled it. Ever since you've been here, we've modeled everything after how you do things. And now that you're not here, we don't know how to do anything.

It's insane. just so fucking stupid on their part but like really stupid yeah like it's like just they they tweet fired him he mentioned how he even shot on himself he was like I was really dumb it was dumb that I made

these jokes and they were like we gotta get rid of you and it's like well yeah no you keep people like that as examples you need them around to be like oh it was really stupid right that was like one of the few things like I was back I remember cancel culture being like a big talking boy and that was one of those things I was like what the fuck that's insane that yeah that was like shut oh

Like if you scrub through everybody's tweets around that time, there are so many tweets that are also just just saying stupid bullshit trying to make people laugh. So it was like I understand that they were was a different place. I understand that they're fucking inappropriate jokes. Sure. But also calm down. He's not like I don't think it was one of those projection things. Yeah. I was like I didn't get that vibe at all. Also he denounced them. That's the thing where he himself was like these. He shouldn't have even had to do. He should just been like obvious like dude is fucking 10 years. Like, to me, signs of the times. I know what you mean. I know what you're saying. You got to. Especially the fact that he denounced it is just like, especially why do you care? Yeah.

Like, obviously like certain things. I have an interesting example about like people departing. Because this is like, this is the weird, this is so interesting. So there's two, two of my favorite bands,

born of Osiris, there was a guitarist Jason Richardson. When he left that band, I don't like their music anymore because that guy was a fucking genius with like writing riffs. And he fit perfectly in that band. then he actually didn't improve another band that he joined for a little while called Chelsea

Grin they left but then he joined all that remains and he actually in my opinion maybe people disagree with me but I feel like he they just released two or three new songs because they're hinting towards a new album I hate the songs he's too good to be in that band there are a very grounded metalcore band and his riffs are way too intricate and they sound stupid in that band. The guitarist Ollie, he died a few years ago. Ollie was the guy that wrote all that music. And he was like, you know,

you heard the stuff on a guitar hero. Guitar Hero 3, fucking 6, all that remains like that fucking album that like blew them out. That guy wrote brilliant riffs. Very easy, digestible, catchy riffs. And this guy, Jason's going, and it just sounds like

fucking, I don't know, chickens getting slaughtered to me. Like, it's just like, Like it's all over the place and I'm like, it's too much. Can you guys name an artist that is too good for the band they were a part of? That one, I just definitely, that is one thing. I think this one is really famous. What do we got?

M and D12. Well, they were all good rappers though, not to give them, not to, they were all, all but. Come on, let's be real. They were fine. Hold on. Hold on. Hold on. You know there's somebody in that group that is not good.

Who is it? Am I missing? Am I missing, buddy? No, Bizarre. Was Bizarre that bad? Am I tripping? Is he that bad? I was, I listened to him when I was way too young to understand, like, oh, this is

really bad rapper. To me, bizarre was like, you ever, you ever, I don't want to be that mean. He just, he's like, he's like, he's like, you have respect. That's all you have respect for the person. I'll upgrade it from what I was going to say. He was kind of, it felt more like make a wish to me. Like, it felt like they were like, it felt like, yeah, I was going to say something way worse than that.

That sounds so much worse than. I thought you were going to say. No, no, it was, you're a big aish rapper. It was the same. It's obviously M. I cleaned it up a little bit, actually. EasyE. EasyE was way better than everyone else he was around and freaking what you call it.

Easy E.E. It was, to me, he got, he just got lucky that around the time, being kind of shitty was still kind of acceptable. And a shitty person? Or being a shitty rapper. Oh, being a shitty rapper was still somewhat acceptable in some instances around the early 90s. Around the early 90s. He was, well, he started off being. fucking like like a horror show

but he picked it up pretty quickly and then obviously because like and Drey was this what's the oh my god I'm blinking on that song the first song lady ever dropped oh my god uh I don't remember this first song oh the Simpsons yeah he was like The Simpsons and the Simpsons

I got AIDS No it's just a and I'm gonna die soon No he just died farewell He's dead he dies right then I got AIDS and I'm fucking dead That's like that's like that queen song where like he died in the middle of it and Brian May had to finish it.

That's real. Wait, while he was recording? No, well, I mean, he died like while they were while they were recording. Well, that's what I was saying. So you're like, that's like, I was like, wait, no way. No, there's a queen song that starts off with Freddy and ends with Brian May because he died

before they could finish. Mama, niggas. That's great. I'd be sick if he, that's how he should. I did see some of his older stuff and it made me feel bad. Like his newest stuff, I guess. latest stuff, I should say, before he died,

where he was so visibly ill. And I was like, fuck, I hate looking at this. Live aid, he was, I think he literally gave a lot of his life to that performance. I think he was like, I'm on my way out, you know. Let's just have fun like one more time. It's pretty great. It's like Goku going Super Saint 3 and running out his clock. That's exactly what it says.

Yeah, I'm going to go for it, I guess. Yeah, I think, I think Devon Townsend was far too good for his trapping young lad. Oh, for sure. Yeah, I'm saying. Yeah, that's... You listen to Shrapping Young Ladd and it's like, it's fine. That guy's crazy. What was the position in shopping a lad?

He was, I think... He wasn't the drummer. I don't even know. He could drum, too? That dude's crazy. I really don't understand that guy. What do you think of his new album? What did you think of his new album?

I haven't heard it yet. That's... Oh, Power Nerd? Yeah. I haven't heard it yet. I've seen it. Like, I usually, like, try to make time. Right.

For that kind of a thing? Because he always puts out weird stuff. And I never know how it's going to hit me. It is definitely one of those. It's a weird one all over the place. Empath or whatever. Earl. Earl and Frank Ocean in Odd Future.

Oh, from My Name is Earl? Yeah, that too. Yeah. What was the fat guy in that show? Yo, he got yoinked, bro. He looks like a monster now. Really? I love that.

I love that for him. Hey, who is that? Yeah, the, remember the Titans fat-ass guy? I can't remember his name. And my name is Earl? Ethan Soply, Ethan Suffley. I'm not going to look. He was really overweight.

The guy in the fat ass in American History X, my eyes are seeing the glory of the trampling at this, that guy. So he's a yoke now. He's fucking, he's like, I was going to say, listen, you got me? I've never seen my name is Earl. Oh. I just know that that's a shot. He's not. Jason Lee, right?

Jason Lee is the main character. Yeah. And then, I mean, you know Jason Lee, right? Yeah. Oh, my God. Pretty much he like. He went from being like really, really overweight to like got like a problem. He had like a condition.

Something happened. Of course. And then he was just like, I'm going to work out. And he didn't just work out. He worked out like the Wayne Johnson works out. And now he looks like a weapon of mass destruction. Yeah. It's awesome.

He's so jacked. It's like he also had the genetics to be that jacked as well. He's just a big guy to begin with. Big guy. Yeah. So it was just like, oh. Good frame to carry it. But he refuses to, he doesn't need it, but he refuses to get the skin surgery either.

So he has a little loose skin, but it's not like that bad since he has so much muscle on him. He looks insane. So it's, yeah, I was like, fuck good for him. He started a podcast talking about, like, nutrition and health and shit. He's insane. He's in his shape that's like wild. I'm a little sad because I kind of wanted him to always be that, like, fat nerd in every thing. I mean, he's still funny.

He's still a funny, nerdy guy, but he's just. He's good, but he just can't play those roles. He was in a, he was in a butterfly effect with, with, uh, with, uh, ashton culture. Yeah. Why can't you, can you not be a jack nerd? I guess because you just, It just, it, you can't. Henry Cavill.

Henry Cavill's a Jack nerd. Henry Cavill never plays a nerd though. That's true. He never plays a nerd. He needs to play a nerd. I want him to play a fucking nerd. You see him be a nerve whenever he talks, he's like, did you see? So I'm playing Warham.

Yeah. He's so funny. Did you see when he was like fucking that PC when he was building it essentially? Yeah. It was so, it was a little too sensual. I was like, I was loving. He was love. I was actually like, I was like, am I gay?

What's happening right now? Because he's like, he's like, really taking care of it. I was like, oh my God. Women are. probably gushing right now watching this. Like, oh, imagine if he would like take care of me like that? And I'm like, no, what about me? What about me?

Bits fold him into it, throw it away. Dumb bitch. I shot out to him, dude. He seems like a really, really genuinely cool guy. He's probably the only celebrity. Like, I want to meet celebrities, but he's the only celebrity I want to hang out with. He's probably like the only one that I want to hang out with. I went to him and who else is the type of.

Like, I don't want to hang out with Keith David. I just want to say hi to him. Because I feel like. I want to talk to Keith David. That's what I mean. Like, I want to just, like, talk to them, but I don't want to spend enough time with them because at a certain point, he's going to be like, you're really fucking weird. You know? And I'm like, no.

No, I've been exposed. And then at that point, I'm just going to like, let it all the weirdness out. Like, let me taste your dick or something. That is crazy. Let me taste your dick, Keith. I didn't even mean it, but it's like, it's like, I'm like, it's always like, like Tourette's at this point. They just can't hold it in. I got to say some weird shit.

He's like, when people were, like, making fun of him about him choosing the divorce. He was like, if you don't like what I'm doing on Hasman, don't watch it. Yeah. Like, suck my dick. I don't, I don't care. Suck my fucking silver-throated dick. You fucking rat bastard, you. I'll kill your dog in his sleep.

Oh, ew. Immortal Gordo rode and he says, hello, trash cans. I also grew up in Ulster County. First of all, I never grew up in Ulster County. Yeah, we didn't grow up in Ulster County. Yeah, we knew. I knew, I heard about it. It was like, it was like the, it was like the, what, what,

Was it that place in the Lion King? Is that Ulster County? I'm pretty sure. Nopeold's Alton. I'd never really been there. How do your counties work, man? I don't understand. They're,

there's like how counties work over here pretty much. Well, but we have like proper cities. And then you guys have, but then like you have all these cities and towns. But like, but like a town isn't an actual city. You know what I mean?

Yeah, we have towns. Like, I'm, we're from the town of Fishgo. Right next to was the town of Wappenger's. What city do you live in? Did you live in?

We lived in a town, not a city. No. towns and cities are not No but you have to like With your area code You have an official city that you live in No we have a town we live in

See that's what I'm talking about Like when I talk about towns Like Hollywood is a town But it's in the city of Los Angeles I think that might be true within cities Like a major cities is different Well that's what I'm saying I don't understand your geographic

But we lived in straight up towns They were towns Yeah there wasn't a city around But like so you guys had your own area code Yeah we did So it's a small city Did you guys have a mayor? Yeah, I think so.

We had a town mayor. Well, then you got, that's a city. No, it's a, I think, no way. It's just small enough to consider it a town, but that is what a city is. A city has a mayor. You might be very technically right, but we live, it was called a town. Yeah, yeah, they understand the vibe of the town. On forms, on forms, they would call it a city?

I understand what you're saying. Would they? Yeah. I don't remember. I don't remember. I don't remember. I don't remember. I don't know.

But it wasn't a city. A town is a, is a, is a term. It's not an official like like say, I'm from a small town But then it's like I'm from the small town Of some stupid fuck city That's 600 people You would say this you would say

Like Fishgul's not a city But you would say the city of Fishgill If that makes sense I think you're right But I also remember seeing it said on documents Whatever dude I don't care You're gay Whatever

Whatever it doesn't I mean It doesn't matter I just I have a hard time Trying to figure out Other places that aren't like Living not in major cities is a completely different experience.

Like not being in cities is way different than like Yeah. Because we lived in a, we lived in like just the like the last vestiges of a suburb. Look, there's,

I was in like Nebraska or south to the north of, I was in one of those fuck states, right? And there was, they had a, they had a city called Jefferson that had like 600 people in it. Yeah,

that's insane. That's a fucking town. You know what I mean? But it is a city. You can take over, you can take over that city. That's just, that's like a few,

us. Those immigrants are they're so. Is this place real? It is. At the time. What are we doing? Now there might be, well, let's take it. Let's take it.

This was 2009. They might have 1,500 people now. That's whatever. All those immigrants. They let in all those immigrants, right? And they went there and they're fucking, now it's a bunch of Haiti, Shinseng, Sape, and a bunch of Venezuelans taken off her building. So we're already too late.

We should have jumped then. I know, they got it now. It's literally, there's a barbershop in every corner. There's a fucking, there's like, a, bunch of Caribbean food everywhere. Yeah. Everybody's dancing the streets all fucking night. They're fucking seething the regular Jeffersonians.

I'm not racist, but. What happened to my town? And now they're going to look to, you know, Aaron Lewis of Stained where he's like, am I the only one? No, God. I'm a racist gun. You ever see that?

I almost did a video on it, but it was just so stupid. But anyway, he says, I also grew up with Altragani Woodstock specifically. Oh, no, that's not by the said. That's a little. That's pretty far. It's like three hours. I've been to Woodstock.

That area sucks dick. Terrible area. Yeah, Woodstock sucks. It's terrible area. It's so funny growing up hearing about Woodstock and then you go to it and it's just like this place. What wasn't even at Woodstock?

I know. It wasn't. Isn't that crazy? I don't even, where is it? It was like, it happened like really close to Canada from my mistake. It happened like Fubber.

Oh wow. Well, Woodstock was supposed to happen in Woodstock and then I think the town of Woodstock was like you can't do that here. But they already called it in Woodstock. So they like I think it happened in like some other. town somewhere else. I had no idea. I think we only know this because we grew up around. Yeah. I went to a comedy show in Woodstock, like a comedy event. I bet that was hilarious.

Yeah, right. You know, those smoke, we with a lot of cool people. Um, I don't know if this guy, he's a black dude that's on a podcast now. He, uh, he did a shot here. Oh, that narrowed it down. One second. Let me think. I'm thinking. I'm getting there. I'm getting there. Wait, you didn't even like, I know, but he's, he was a part of all deaf digital. I forgot his name. Uh, but I smoked weed with him. really fucking crazy. So many people. Bruce Bruce, Bruce,

Patrice O'Neill. I just kidding. Name every nigger and I don't know their name but I might guess it right eventually. Yeah, just gonna start saying niggas with podcasts. But I was there with,

I was happy went there. It was like really fucking weird. It was like a lot of like, it was just a bunch of like clearly white people that have never left their town. And I was, it's me and the black people

like, we're the only niggas here, right? And I was like, he was like, don't do any, don't move too fast. Don't move too fast. They're definitely watching us.

As we're just, smoking weed in the corner. It was me and like our friend Elliot. Oh yeah, yeah. And I was like, this is weird. I don't like this. I just saw. I don't want to be here. I want to be some, bro. Here's a fun little question from the platonic form of homosexuality.

Hot. So does friendship? Friendship? That's crazy. If you could invite any fictional character onto the show as a guest, who would it be? To keep things interesting, not only is that particular character made or real to

appear on the show, so too is the corresponding fictional metaphysics characters and lore of their native universe that's crazy so you're just basically by accepting them onto the show you're basically welcoming them like you're chalk zoning them and their entire world building I was gonna say Garoitha Rivia

but I was like no you don't want all that shit no no no no you gotta do something simple no vampires I feel like you gotta pick something simple that you feel like there could be mean on Arthur Morgan I get that would alter history I guess slightly right how would it that's fine

Well, let it. What do you mean how? How would it alter it so significant? Well, everything. There's no Sandini. But that's probably like now like a like a momah in this style of town that existed, you know? Yeah. But you're not.

Gamut's going to be a little different. He's going to be like, uh, Rimo Labby. Remy Labo. Yeah. Remy Labo. I think I would pick something like. Commander Shepherd. Yeah.

Oh. Oh. Shepherd. How boring would that be? Yeah. He would be so lame. He wouldn't be a person. He'd be just.

Because there would be no one controlling him. You're right. He's just, he's just a funny great dead moron with somehow a lot of accolades. Dude, do we kill Keith David if we we'd be one of his characters on?

Because then he just disappears and now he's this. Oh, I don't know. No, no, no. No. No. That's so bad. And is he aware?

Is he like, what happened to me? I'm becoming Commander Anderson Why am I The safest thing that I think could yield the best results The one that would interrupt the world the least Although still significantly But I feel like you could have a good conversation I want to know the politics

Like the real political philosophies of Dr. Neocortex From the Crash Bandicoot games Chris that would so wildly destroy the way Australia would not be able to have people. It doesn't take place. It doesn't take place in Australia. It takes place on like some random isolated island. So that island exists now, but it's like already isolated.

Do you think that cortex is like, like it has to be, it's points in time? Like has the crash things already happened? Because if it has, then there are definitely crashed like muffler. We're going to walk outside and somebody's going to twirl past us. Do do do do do do do do. Womper food are going to be addictive as shit because they're going to give people life back

If your fucking dad dies They're like oh I'll just feed him a bunch of Womper fruit and he'll rea erect Yeah I mean Ouka people will take Oka Uka masks and then blow newts That'd be sick as fuck That'd be fine

But no would be very different But only Cortex knows about this Yeah like nobody Nobody knows where the island is yet No but by that But um Bum Bum

There's no way that kind of And just breakthrough. That's a, that is an insane breakthrough. Motherfucker, you were about to say Gerald of Rivia. No, no. You were to unleash a supernatural plague of everything. And that is why I immediately walked it back.

I would love to talk about how cool it is the murder monsters. Is it fun? Would you try to go through the ritual? Absolutely. Absolutely. You're like how cool it would be. Nope. When I was maybe a child, I would have died definitely, but like had more.

of a chance. I don't know any strong enough children. I could have been like, oh, yeah, I'm just going to endure torture and killing minds as a little boy. Look, I would, look, we'll get Dr. Cortex on, right? And, yeah, I want to ask him, I want to ask him a question and be like, Dr. Cortex, um, I know this is kind of a rhetorical, but I just want you explain why you chose, uh, to have the hard arm on your forehead. What if he's like my name. My name is actually, I don't want to say I just want to know why you represented that like on your you don't have to

I'm not curious I'm not curious of what it means I'm curious of why you put the hard arm He would be the thing about cortex That cortex might get physical Because of how upset he gets Maybe he gets so really upset That is not why I put the end on my forehead

Like he's just like but he's also like no you know it is isn't he like he's like three feet tall right he's three feet tall but his His projection scary though is his world like that's true Crash would be if you put crash in the UFC He would kill anyone there like actually like he'd beat the fuck out of broad He's just slapping he's just fucking people up I don't think I don't think a regular person could muster up the damage to really The when you think about the size like actually What do you think about the size of a bandicoot? And the fact that he spins with enough force to shatter wooden boxes.

Right. With ease. Oh, no, Cratch is bigger than a regular bandicoot. He is. He is at least like four or five feet tall. I don't know how tall he is at all. I think he's like four feet tall. Let's see.

13 feet. 13 feet. 13 stories tall. That's just a tornado. That's just doom. He's 13 stories tall. And in that perception. And that world, is it crunch?

Is it crunch huge? Right in his name, right? Crunch. Crunch? So that means those crunch massive. Those fruit, that means the, fucking, the boulder that chases him sometimes. The borgas him is so. Well, first of all, that means cortex is massive.

Also, cortex is no slouch either. He would have brought him. You're trying to talk sweet to him. He would have beat the, he would have ate one of us. Dingo dial is fucked. I love that idea of. that would be a cool. See, that would be brilliant to me.

Just like if you created that shit, like, what if like some naughty dog people were like, yeah, actually we didn't, we forgot to tell you that. Yeah, we forgot to tell you the-13 stories tall. Crash is five feet tall. Exactly. Sounds about right. Okay, that sounds right. Yeah. So do you think his feet and his accolades? He's so strong.

Think of how many boxes fell on him and he's unconscious, right? He's hurt, but he gets right back up into the fight. Yeah. Those are like shipping crate boxes. Like he fucking. He's fine. Those boxes are coming through the Panama Canal right as we speak. Right. And are like built to withstand all sorts of hazards. And this dude spins once. He can body slam through slightly reinforced ones. That's right. That's right. Bam.

His roundhouse kick would put someone in the floor. Would he be able to, to me, it always comes back to Michael. Phillips because when everybody's so worried about like cheating but I'm like he's he's he's he's such a freak can you in good was this kind of should this have happened should Michael Phillips been able to do this when he's just way too the thing it's almost like that when the Chinese fucked up right they build a Ming Yao they built him they they they built they they they engineered people to fuck to make sure. And they probably put stuff in them to make him seven foot six.

Oh, he was seven five. You seven five. That doesn't surprise me at all. Now, no. Because of, I think, all the genetic meddling they did that he was too injury prone. So he was really dominant, but he was only played for a handful of years because he just couldn't. He was just too fucked up. He looked like the, um, the, um, the art, um, the offspring from what you call it?

From, uh, the, um, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. The alien movie. Oh, um, actually built like that. Yeah, yeah. I mean, that is a basketball player. I'm Tim Walsh. And I love, uh, how does Tim Walsh? I'm Tim Wals.

I'm, I'm, I actually don't know how to impersonate Tim Wals. I'm, I don't know how to impersonate Tim Wals. What the fuck is that? Orgas. I like,

uh, is that is that? No, we need more, we need more time around him to really get it. Do you think, do you think honestly if, I couldn't impersonate my Pence though either, to be honest with you. Because he was just like, he was just the guy. I'm Mike Pence.

Nah. Is it crazy that he saved the world? Off of the COVID stuff? You know what I mean? Over the COVID stuff, right? No, no. It's so absurd. We kind of owe him a lot.

At the same time, he was like, I'm not. Yeah, he didn't certify the vote that. I'm not. The fake vote. I'm not certifying your fake elector votes, you fucking idiot. What makes it insane, what makes it. You're too honest, Mike. You're too honest.

I'm like, what a crazy thing to say to somebody. The fact that he said that is what, yeah, that's one of those things is like, listen. What makes it insane is that all that happened and it's whole, the vast majority of his cabinet's like, this nigga's crazy. Like, that is like, this dude's crazy. They actually, the N-word too, they actually, oh, this n-gess is crazy. Mike Pence was like, I know I'm going to offend some people. I'm real sorry. I'll send money to like Howard or whatever.

This niggas insane. And then he fucks off. And then he fucks off. He flies off with his force light. He electrocutes a gay man into fucking mist. And then he leaves. Like, Buttigieg.

You're in the crowd? Yes, I am. Buttigieg, you're next. But look, he's like, look. I don't like gay people. Yes, I am Emperor Palpatine. However, I care about this country. And he shocks Buttigieg's and leaves.

Shocks the fuck out of Buttigieg. Yeah. It's just a wild. His name is a butt. I love that his name is booty sludge. Yeah, it is. It's exactly what it is. It's but it's a juge.

Literally the word but and he's gay. Like that's that's a joke. That is a joke that was written by. Do you think that he wouldn't have been gay if that wasn't his last name? I don't know. He's like a nice guy though. I like him. I didn't like him early.

Like when he was in the, I remember not liking him in the debates when I saw him. But he seems like normal now. Like I don't know. I think now that he's not running for, presidency. They're not telling him not to talk like a human. Yeah, he's just being very normal. I saw one of those like Jubilee type things. Oh yeah. Me too. So he did that and um, he had a good conference. He's ultimately, he's good. He's good. I like him. Yeah. He's ultimately a politician. I don't trust these people. But like, he does a good job of like communicating two. Which is like important. He was, he was very honest. He was just like, look, dude, anyone that is a politician has ambition. There's, there's like, that's undeniable. You can't say I don't. I'm here too. Yeah. And he was like, I know that people when they run for people. He was just like, I know that people when they run for people. president, they have to act a certain way.

I just thought it was so fucking stupid that the chick that he was talking to with the clip that I saw where she was like, oh, Obama did this. And I'm like, well, first of all, Obama's not running. And number two, what does that have to do with like, Obama did something so Democrats bad? So you're going to vote for Trump now? What the fuck does that mean? It was so crazy. The Green Party girls.

And I was like, girl, you are a host. Sweetheart, I was like, you have. Like, it's so dumb. I'm like, damn, just punch her. I want, I want him to go. I'm gay. I can punch you. I'm gay. That is fucking insane.

I want him to go like, I hear your point. However, did you know that I'm gay? I just wonder here to be like, look, girl, I understand that you, like, I understand you pay about the green party. It smells like a man.

It smells like men. It smells like men. My penis smells like men, so I'm gay. He smelled a man on my penis? Duh. That's fucking insane. Take a whip.

I never thought about that I never this really opened my eyes He was he was like talking He was like talking to one of the girls He was like I'm really about the green party Yeah I'm really for the green party He's like look girl You're running for the shut the fuck up party

Like look I agree that they are important The green party isn't even green They're not even green like If they if the green party came up And had like a fucking Grinch run for president I would vote for it at a fucking heartbeat I would scream because Grinch is a real And the Grinch has powers that are terrified

Well he's strong which means he's like he's gonna be a good leader He could be on the front line He could be, He could be the commander chief He could be on the front lines You imagine Russia

If we ever get into a war with Russia They see a fucking nine foot tall Grinch Running at them on the fucking He's nine feet tall? Yeah he's yeah No he's You're nine feet tall

Mr. Grinch The Grinch you want is nine feet tall Look He's either Gritch is nine and a half feet tall He's either nine feet tall Or 13 stories It's one or the other

I hate He's easily taller the crash video. Well, yes, so am I and you. Yeah? We're not 13 stories. Imagine being stuck there. Like, we're all talking.

We're having conversation. And you're like, but like, we're not, that's not true. I'm not nine stories tall. I'm like five, eight. What's happening?

Guys, why does everybody be so stupid around me? What's your height if you're permanently in a wheelchair? Uh, probably you're full in your body. I don't think so. No, because you're not that tall,

really. No, because your height only matters so much as you can reach it. You know what I mean? That's true, but you still have a height, you know? So. If he dies, right, you can't put him in only the wheelchair length of casket, you know? I mean, you can. He can't go in only a wheelchair.

You can sandwich them up. Yeah, you can fold it either. Fold up like a suit. Exactly. You can't put him in, if he's taking a shower to clean his whole by, you can't put him in only the wheelchair length shower. sure you can I want to be taller Like say you

You strap my You lock my legs in With some type of mechanism Right And then you lock me into the wheelchair Standing That's sick as fuck Dude

It's like a segue But like It's like an unnecessary Second You're just standing At the edge of the wheelchair Yeah And I'm just

You also can't stand Really You can't keep yourself up You topple so quick We figure it out They figured it out With the segways That is

You'll figure it out with the wheelchair. No one's ever made this request before ever. But I'm going to bitch and complain that they're not catering to my people. To the, what do you, hyperdiscipline? I don't know what you would call us. The insane? Yeah. The fucking mentally ill.

Oh, fuck. I got a guy out of here. All right. So we, yeah, let's, well, so we can either, you guys need to keep the good time's rolling. And I'll just fuck off right now. No? Okay. Would that, would that be better? That's fine.

Yeah, what do you got? You got to go to the airport, right? Yeah, I got to go drop. I so don't want to do. I fucking hate driving. I got to go to the airport, drop off. You got to go to LAX, right? Yeah, I got to go to L.A.S.

Yeah. At least it's 12, 30-ish right now, so like it shouldn't be like, totally fucked. Yeah, we'll keep it going for a little bit. Yeah. You just pop by later. I'll come back later. I'll get to grab the shit, yeah. Yeah.

All right. Rick Flair said, cold train, baby. Cool train. Derek is exiting. Come here, booty. Judge, who! Cole sucks, but he just dicks him like that. Cole train fighting alongside Pete Buttigieg is something that I don't think I can

really find it. That's amazing. While towering over them is a 13-story grinch. Just, just picking the fuck out of buildings. It's the 13-story grinch. That's so crazy. Being as erratic as he is normally while destroying Russia. It's insane.

They shoot a look at him and he grabs it and eats it. Dom, what is it? Dom, I'm scared. All right. Marcus is terrified. All right, let's see. Who's dead. Mark is, who?

We've got a couple more questions. Shaking. Terrified. Shitty. Shit coming out of his geese. He's going out of his geese. It's right. It's right.

Imagine being that scared. That's so much shit. He's so scared. This is fucking Marcus Phoenix. A guy that's been fearless for over a decade and a half. And all of a sudden, this tall grinch, he can't deal with it. He can't. He's just what's going on?

And Dom is just watching him be horrified. He's like, hey, come on, chill. Oh, That's so insane. I'm out of your living, man. Oh, fucking Jesus Christ, all right. Oh, man. I don't have to change the camera now.

It's actually a lot simpler. Dude, that fucking. Jesus Christ. He's shitting out of his suit up his neck? He's shitting so much. The suit's obviously, like, I assume it's some form of a spandex. He's on the most minimal level. Yeah.

So he's shitting so hard. And so much that it's leaking up through his neck out. That is so much. It's this fecal matter all over the place. Oh, God, all right. Dom's afraid to touch him because he shit in himself so much. Jesus Christ. All right.

His suit's fat with all the shit. I get it. Freddie, your biggest fan wrote it. He says, hello, my favorite podcast, friends. I'm turning 19 of it and wanted to know what's the best present you've ever received, lots of love. Your biggest fan, Fred. Well, I don't know. Happy almost birthday, bud.

Yeah, happy almost birthday. You're about to, you're about to 19? That's crazy. Remember where you're 19? No. Oh, okay. I barely remember it. Like, that was like so uneventful, 19.

Well, I remember being that young at least. That's what I'm on tomorrow. Oh, yeah, of course. Obviously. That's what Call of Duty's been this entire time. Is we living your young days? Yeah, I'm playing. I'm like, this is kind of wild.

Because I haven't played Call of Duty since, like, 2009. Like really. Like I played like Black Ops for like The original Black Ops for like five hours. I think I played some of the more modern ones

for like maybe like three hours of pop But never really got into them But this one's like it's good shit man It's genuinely like Oh this I remember now Why people cared about this And it just feels like It feels like that old school shit again

Very good job they did this I'm proud of them Because now they finally They breathed life back into their franchise Yeah it's about time They finally reached like JRP rules where like Oh, it's the sixth, the black ops, so it's the good one.

You know what I mean? How like, oh, Final Fantasy 7, yeah, now it's real. No, all of those Final City games are good one. Yeah, but you know. But you know. Obviously. This feels like a, this feels like specific laborer. Because that campaign, I'm only like a couple missions into the campaign, but the campaign is fucking sick.

Really? It is one of the coolest like first person shooter like campaigns I've seen in a while. Like, there's so many missions that are stealth. Like, you don't have to shoot at all. Well, I mean, like, the end of it is always gets into the fucking, it's so funny because it starts off as like, almost like splinter cell light. We're like, you actually have a lot of options. And like, you could sneak around and do crazy shit.

You could pick pocket and you could do all this crazy shit. And then by the end, it's like. But then at the end, it becomes like fast, the Fast and Furious. Which is awesome. Light him up. Yeah, you're sneaking. Like, we stuck it. Dude, I was playing a level.

There's no spoilers. I'm pretty sure, like, everybody has seen this. But there's a level where like literally Bill Clinton is in it. And you're like infiltrating like some dinner. It's like 1999. So I think it's before he's president. I think. When was when was Bill Clinton president?

So I should look this up. So he served two terms, right? Yes. Or no. So what happens is two terms back. Bush was two, right? So Bush got elected in 2000. 1993 to 2001.

Yeah. Okay. So yeah, this is 1991, so it's before, like, he's like on the come up. And you basically have to infiltrate like this party that he's having in DC and they're like underneath it. There's like a black site where some hostages are being held. And you can sell through the entire thing. And at the end, it just goes to shit and you motorcycle ride over a bunch of it. It's fucking ridiculous.

But it's awesome. It's good shit. Highly recommended, actually. Like I've never, I've never recommended a call of duty game before. Easy recommend. It's good shit. I also have no clue what the fuck is going on. But it's still really cool.

I would say the best present for me, though, ever was the going to San Diego this year and going to the thing. Yeah. I really, I wanted the work there. That was my dream job when I was little to work at the, at the zoo and the, like, the reserve. That was like my dream job. And I got to go then do the behind the scenes thing. And it was amazing. It was like an experience that I like, I cried afterwards.

I was so happy. Damn. Yeah. I don't know. The best present, the present I've ever gotten for a birthday. I don't know. Like I feel like it's either you're a kid Like it's either like I'm a kid and I got like a PS2 or a Gameboy

Or I'm like 27 and my girlfriend agreed to do something crazy You know what I mean? Like those are like Those are the only things that come up When I think about it Because I don't think I've ever been given a trip for my birthday Because my birthday's in December

Yeah your birthday falls on a really sucky time unfortunately Yeah it's really It's like post Thanksgiving so everyone doesn't have the real money to like really get you big shit. And then it's before Christmas, but they're like, yeah, we'll get to a really cool Christmas present, I guess.

It's post Thanksgiving pre-Christmas, which is kind of like, it's fine? You and make half that problem, where you guys are like... Yeah, we just merge our birthdays because it's like... That's probably the plan for this year.

Yeah, we don't really care. But the thing is like, this is the kind of thing that makes me think about astrology. And don't roll your fucking eyes. I'm too late. Because I'm not saying that the stars literally say anything, right?

But what I mean is like, Is it theoretically possible, hear me out, that people with similar birthdays at similar points in time based on their proximity to certain cultural milestones that everybody celebrates, is it potentially possible that the majority of people with similar birthdays end up having personality types that are similar to each other based on that proximity? Like if you have a birthday in the summertime where everybody's free, it's sunny, everybody's out of school, versus you have a birthday in early December where nobody's free, it's cold, you know, it's like immediate proximity to two major holidays. That's not astrology. No, I understand. I'm not saying it's literally astrology, but like the end goal, the end result of astrology making determinations of people's personalities based on their birthdays. like is there potential validity to that

not because of the stars but because of you know what I'm saying because that's like is what I'm saying makes sense societal as well too right like that's a but do you know what I'm saying

it makes sense that people that are often have the same area grow up in the same area that have the same birthday in a period of time they may have similar personality traits not area I mean like literally like in the United States

area in a year area in a year right that makes sense, I guess. There could be, there's something to that. Even to astrology, right, not giving it this credence. A lot of it is fucking moronic. Oh, yeah. But to the

vastness and insanity that is this galaxy, to believe that where you are on the planet, where it's tilted towards this, this force that is the sun, which when you think about what the sun is, it is almost so wild

to understand that it gives you, you have to stop thinking about it. You know, when you think about space till, you're like, oh, shit, there's too much going on up there. I got to stop. So think that that does make sense that, like, I guess based on like maybe this fucking extreme cosmic event, it pulls a little bit of the fucking water in my brain's direction. I don't know. Yeah. Possibly form something.

I don't believe that. Like, that's, that is not. But also the form of Australia is dumbest because of the fact that the planet and everything moves in the universe. So most people that say they're there. this sign is actually wrong. That's true. Yeah. Like they're not.

They're not. Like one of my friend is like, on my, I'm at Pisces. He has the fucking two fish. Right. Yeah. And then I was like, dude, technically you'd be something different. He was like, don't tell me that. I have a tattoo of it on my body already.

Don't inform me of this now. It's less about the designation, but so much as like the group similarity. I guess is what I'm saying. So like, what I'm saying is like, I don't even know if this is necessarily the specific generalizations that are true. But like for the, for like the sake of the hypothetical, if like you're born in in summer, Like, let's say you're born in like late June, early July. Your birthday is probably a pretty big deal because it's like the weather's nice, no one's busy. Like everybody's out of school.

You know, it's not really in conflict with anything crazy. There's no real major holidays. So I could see that resulting in generally like a majority population with those birthdays being more outgoing or more like extroverted than somebody who's like, oh, my birthday's kind of shared with Christmas or like lumped in. It's kind of in the dreary months. It's not really, eh, you know, I keep to myself. whatever. I don't think it's, you know what I'm saying? Like, I feel like that could potentially be real. Because I don't get a fuck over there. This is in April. It's Louis in spring. And I'm like, I don't give a fuck. You have a pretty inconsequential one. What do you mean? Tax time, I guess is like when you're

an adult tax time. Yeah. You get you're happy or you're really fucking upset. Yeah. I'm never happy. Never happy after taxes. I don't know how you could be. That one year, the first year of Trump being president, we got money back. I felt good. That was nice. Which one? The first year of Trump being president. I never got money back. I got money back. I got like $45 back and I was like, yay. Yay, 45. That was the meal. That was the meal of the day. Yeah, you were destitute. Oh no, that time I was reading the podcast. Yeah. But I was like fine. But like, that was like, yay, cool. Yay. And then every year after, I'm like, oh, man, I really don't want to be here. I want to leave right before this time happens. Okay. So this is what the fuck is evil fucked up

imprudin. He says, hey, fellas, parentheses derogatory. Long time listener, first time asker. serious hypothetical. Would you rather shit watermelons or urinate rectangles? Shit watermelons. What? Yeah, shit watermelons.

Thanks for helping me. Tiny ones. Well, how do you know they're not tiny rectangles? Your penis is not something a rectangle ever. Right, but like what is it?

It might be a rectangle smaller than a diameter of your pee hole, I guess. I guess the thing that, the thing that, okay, so my answer is rectangles.

And the reason is, I know how big a watermelon is. I don't know, A rectangle is nebulous. There's no... So are watermelon. Not nebulous. It's quantifiable

what the variety does change. But like a watermelon is very distinctly like a hard, giant fruit. And a rectangle is just a shape. Like you don't know, like piss rectangles. You don't know if that's like

soft rectangles, you know, or like silly bands. You look at the little tiny, really little tiny watermelons. Yeah, but now think about a rectangle. The thing is that, rectangles, this is why I would choose watermelon, right?

Because watermelons are more quantifiable, where there's a smallest, there's a smallest watermelon, and then there's the biggest one. The biggest one will kill you. Yes, but the smallest rectangle possible, and then halfway through that, the biggest rectangle possible, the range is so hard. Right, but a rectangle. At least it's quantifiable. Like, like, this is the area quantifying, like, the watermelon, right?

It's like this much. Right. But rectangles go on until the fucking cows come home I understand You get pissed a rectangle that's so big That you would erupt I guess the thing that for me it's just like There's a watermelon that will do that also

That's true There's a watermelon that will kill you But there are way more rectangles that will do it Than our watermark I don't think so because a record Chris You're thinking To small scale

There could be a rectangle That's a size of the fucking galaxy Potentially somewhere out there Right, but how do I know it's like rigid or solid? I guess that's kind of the thing where it's just like, how do I know that the rectangle isn't just the shape of the cell of my pee now? Like, how do I know that like it's just normal pee but the cellular structure is rectangles? As opposed to watermelons, which are like very quantifiably like I will notice. I think that's what makes it even more scary is the undefined nature of how what rectangle could be.

Because even a soft rectangle coming out of your penis is going to suck because it's a whole rectangle. You're going to have to do like the clown pulling the fucking straight thing out of your dick. But what if it's like a silly band and it's like it's a rectangle ultimately, but like it's like, you know, it's ultimately not. You'll hold that out of your thing, you know. But that's not, that's still not as bad as a watermelon to me. I think a small watermelon is good. I think the scary part is that if you get like a really big watermelon shit, then you're out. You're out of the fight.

Yeah, you're out of the fight. Your pelvis is shattered. You're either crippled or dead. You're literally laying. Your skeleton's going to slip out of your asshole. You're laying in the, you're laying in the, you're laying in the, you're, you're out of the, on the toilet dying with blood funneling up

your asshole with a broken pelvis. Just praying for someone to come and find you and they very likely won't get there in time. Here's a question. Here's a question for Derek, but he's not here. He abandoned us to go to the airport like a freak.

Says the dyslexic casting director in charge of hiring Ginger's Road in. It's crazy. Hey, come, piss and shit. I love your gay parodies, but I do have some hopefully constructive criticism. I feel like you guys have a sort of limited gay vocabulary.

If you guys are feeling brave and want to improve, I recommend looking into some real gay shit. Annie Man Studios, Vids, Dreamy Bull, dig bars music, and any thugshakers content. Godspeed, gentlemen. That is true. Our vocabulary is limited because we are.

You know what we should do? We should get a token gay in the writer's room. Whenever we do this. We find, we'll get Matt Walsh. We'll get Matt Walsh into the studio. He'll be sitting in that chair. A collab would be.

Dave Rubin. Yeah, let's get Dave Rubin in here. It's like, we know we hate you and we know you suck, but we, no, he's probably too ashamed to even know any of that shit. He's probably, like, isolated himself so much

so he doesn't even know what gay means. I feel like he's actually just straight. I'm not gay. I just have a really, really quaint friend. I have a quaint friend. My friend is quite quaint. You know, homosexual, though.

I'm really, he's my buddy. What the fuck is this? Oh, man. God, we get so many questions. And they're so long. Galactic devour of Balls Road. He says,

Hello, my heralds. The Silver Spermer, Cock Rider, and the Incredible Cuck. Jesus Christ. I keep chained in my basement. Oh. Never mind. Yeah, he's still,

that's still us. Now that we have established that Sween does indeed like musicals, true. Yeah, I do. I have talked about. And with the most recent saga having just come out,

I was wondering if you all have any have heard any of Epic the Musical, a retelling of the Odyssey? I have never heard of this in my life. No, I haven't. Is that literally the Iliad? Is that what that is?

Are those interchangeable? I feel like the Iliad is something else. I don't know. I've never even heard of that, to be honest with you, and I like musicals. Epic, the musical. That almost sounds like epic movie

or like disaster movie. Like, the first thing that propped into my head was like, oh, that's a parody, right? Like, that's not real. I don't know I've never fucking heard of that Anyway

It sounds cool actually Let's see Oh Oh here's a few That I think are probably good Chris and Sween Have the patience of saints When arguing with Derek

Hello Cockazoid and the Negroids Nice Thank you Appreciate it Apologies for being gay Thank you. Thank you for having the foresight to pull.

I don't like that. I know you're kidding, but I feel good. I'm gay. I mean, you know, we forgive you. It's like that kid says, dad, I'm sorry I'm gay. And your dad's like, I'm not happy about me. I'm not happy about it. I'm going to love you still.

I'll love you, but I'm not happy about it. I would be thrilled. Jesus Christ. Yeah, I just don't have to deal with someone. They might be a better person likely, you know? I just feel like I just, there's so much I want to deal with. You know what I mean? Huh?

Like what? I don't know. I feel like. if I have a daughter and she's gay I mean she has to worry about getting beat up I guess regardless but I think it would be a lot

it would be a lot less weird I think for me I think as long as my kid's not shitty I don't give a fuck yeah me too like I just like as long as I don't like I want to like my kid at the very least you know I don't really care if you're gay but I want to like you which is not a given

that's not a guarantee I think a lot of parents don't like their kids really yeah that's so unfortunate it. It's not. Because like you made that. You know, you're a person, you know, you can't help. Yeah, but just imagine you're, you're directly responsible for the existence of somebody that you don't like. I can't imagine that. I think that I would like, I would probably like

myself into liking my kid. I think that's what happens. Yeah. You're like, oh, my kind of shitty. It's like, well, I would have like really fucked up kids. It's like, you know that, right? You know that, right? Like, you're aware. Like, you're aware. Are you capable of understanding this? Like, your son's an asshole. Your son should be shot. Your son puts, picks on little kid. You're like having a kid that's a bully. Like you're like what the fuck like my kid sucks. Your son Roe-Hipnald the class the class hamster and sounded it.

He did that. He did that on camera and like you're just going to come. He streamed it. He streamed it live to 10 people. He has no audience. Streaming something that villainous to 10 people is crazy. That's crazy. He's so malicious but he has no audience.

He's not even like captivating. He's not even like captivating. leave malicious. You know what I mean? Well, I feel like little kids don't have what's the biggest child streamer like the Rizzler probably. I don't know if he's a streamer, but like he's like the you know, that kid is fucking, he's on Jimmy Fallon. Have you seen the video of the other kid calling him out to have a boxing match? Oh, baby gronk or whatever. None of this sounds fucking real and I hate it. What's happening right now? I don't know, dude. That kid's going to die though. I don't like the idea that that is unfortunate. I don't like the idea that content creators went into the boxing

sphere a little bit because of the fact that it's, like, oh, we'll just fight each other. And it's like, I'm going to bring a loaded weapon. I'm going to bring a gun. Like, we're going to go to have this fight. You're going to, like, swing at me. I'm going to fall down to cower. You're going to get close.

I'm just going to put it against your hip and pull the trigger a bunch. Shooting somebody in the hip is so fucked up. It's evil. Just kill them. No. That's so fucking. Because you're just paralyzing them. I'm just ruining them walking ever again.

Walking, fucking, everything is ruined. Everything fun about moving. You can't do it anymore. That's insane. I would rather... It's all loaded into his hip and then go to jail with a smile. I'd rather just be shot, I think. Yeah, I don't know.

Anyway. I want to get a gun every time somebody scares me. I just say like you're scaring me and I should like the guy in the mall. You're talking about the guy that like prank that guy and they got shot. You're scared. You're scared. You're feeling uncomfortable. He just shot it.

You're scaring me. He's like, he's like, punch shooting. Yeah, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, punch shooting is so like, all right, let's, hold on, we got to read this question. Have you ever, oh, he says, Kingston, have you really given modern Tyler the creator enough of a chance? I feel like you're being randomly closed minded because he has a lot of songs. I think you would really like and relate to. There's this one called the, what is it, new magic wand where he wraps about killing a girl because she's dating a guy he likes. There's a, there's also garden, garden shed where Estelle sings and then Tyler

rapsed about how he's gay. Oh, well, I know those songs, of course. I mean, like, let me clarify this. I have listened to Flower Boy over and over again. That is my favorite Tyler Creator album. I listen to freaking common you get lost. I think the album is very cool. I've listened to Igor.

I did not like Igor, but it's a very, it's a, it's a very experimental album, but you got to take you for what it is, you know? Like when people make, just like Lincoln Park, just like all other artists, they experiment. And if you enjoy for what it is, you don't for what it isn't, you know. And then Chromacopia is a good album. I just don't exactly correlate with Tyler as much as I used to anymore. I will always have a soft spot for his older music. I always love Wolf.

I always love Goblin. The I fitch mix tip is always one of my favorite things ever. But I just don't really feel the connection to his music like I used to anymore. Yeah. That's just getting older. That's all that's just getting older, you know? Same thing for me and like, like, I would guess like maybe not Joey Bad. I feel like Joy Bad as well.

It's like me how I connect with, like, Illmatic. Elmite doesn't feel the same way or it's the same thing with the Slim Shady LP, you know? Yeah. Like I think it's a great album. I'm a grown ass man now. Yeah, you got it, you know? Exactly. Yeah.

Even Em, even M. I'm sure M when he hears that, he's like, oh, man, I was fucking tripping. In fact, he goes through talking about how like, he's kind of embarrassed him of his discography he's like dude I was a fucking really upset fucking late late 20s late teen guy I was just saying a bunch of fuck shit

because I was mad why you don't you don't understand the world when you're that young you know you think you do you're like oh I fucking I know what's going on but it's like no you're a kid yeah yeah you're really stupid kind of inherently and it's not your fault you know it is it is it gets to be better like what the fuck

I look back at like young me and I would like yo you're just kind of dumb but you'll get it eventually but like you're just kind of stupid. Yeah. Eventually you'll be very conservative and homosexual. Like, it's fine. Some Caucasoid rode and he says, hey gang.

I just wanted to share... Weird. What? It's a wild name. Some Caucasusoid? He's the opposite of him. Some Caucasoid wrote and says, hey gang, I wanted to share in Chris's hatred of Halo 4, although my Halo experience was very different.

As I had only played three before playing four. It's unfortunate. Yeah, that's wild. So I actually really love. liked four because my 12 year old kid brain assumed it was just the evolution of the previous game and at the time story was less important to me i could see i could see that being being the case i guess then halo five came out and i liked it more because it was better than four yeah that makes that tracks it look it took me till i was 20 to play through the master's collection

with my friends and realized how foolish i was as we started as we started for the beginning of ce we got to four i was excited to play it by the time we beat it i never wanted to play it again it paled in comparison. Yeah, I mean, this is this is the, this is obviously the natural. Like, you can't, you can't play those original games and then play four and then be like, yeah, that was great.

Four is so. Four is great if you've never played anything. For people that, if you came from Pac-Man, playing Halo 4 would be crazy. Oh, you'd fuck you. I bet you'd think it was a, yeah, your eyes would be like, yo, this is great. This is like, how do we give this guy, how do we give this game an Emmy or something? Like, what do they get?

You know? This man on an Oscar. this man get this fucking get this feller an Oscar he beats that he beats a literal like space god in a fight it's stupid I don't I can't know I can't then he turns him into a fucking app

he digitizes him he does turn he does literally basically turn him into an app he pretty much goes on Twitter clicks download to this deity pretty much and he throws him on the Apple store that's how he defeats the diet I can use you as a fucking, I can't use the safaris I can watch porn on you.

I can't wait. Okay, here's a good one. Three shots of espresso, six shots in Iquil. Rodin. He says, you have now body swapped with the person you dislike most. How do you live your life from here on out? Remember, they are now in your body as well.

I don't know who I dislike the most. I honestly don't know if I have anybody that sticks out to me immediately as like, I really don't like this person. at this point. There are people that I, like, can't stand or that, like, I think are, like, unrespectable.

Yeah. But, like, I don't know. Like, that's a big question for, like, 30-year-old me. I think 25-year-old me had answers. I think 17-year-old me had answers. I think I'm just chill now, to be honest. Yeah, I think I just kind of grew up.

I don't really hate anybody enough. Maybe, like. I hate Derek. Maybe like Elon? I really don't like him, but I don't hate him. I think the thing with Elon is that, like, he's frustrating, but he's clearly, like, handicapped. So, like, it's hard, you know, like, he's definitely autistic in a way that's, like, debilitating. And it really helps him be, like, it helps him, I guess, throw himself into businesses that he has no business to be a part of.

That's why he's got a lot of success. But, like, if he, he, um, I feel like I don't hate him, though. I don't really hate him that much as don't like him very much. Yeah. I think he's done, I'm sure, like, I remember watching, like, some John Oliver thing about him. And John Oliver's pretty biased. Like, he's like, I like, I like him. But he's definitely, like, he leans more towards the way that I lean.

But, like, even he was like, dude, he's done some good stuff. But, like, that's what's scary about him. Is it, like, he's done good stuff. But it seems, like, completely haphazard. So I don't deny that he's, like, done some good stuff. It's just like, he's done a lot of bad stuff, too. And I also find him cringe. Like, that's kind of the, that's kind of the issue.

Is that, like, you, you're a dickhead and your, you're a dickhead. and your dickhead and your like doing the jump on stage where he's making the X and like the way he speaks is wrong

and fucking weird like I tweeted this yesterday I'm emoting and you're like go vote right now go this is the last chance yeah well he was like uh he's there was an inflection in the way

in the way he was speaking where it's like this is not how a person does like what's what's so fascinating about Elon to me is that like he's courted so much of the conspiracy theory audience Like he's quoted so much of the audience that like doesn't like believes there are lizard people out there. But like if there if I believed in lizard people, he would like he would be one of the only people that I would be certain was one.

And that's what's so fascinating about it because he just like he jump he's doing the jump X thing. He chants USA wrong. Really? Yeah. He was like US. Hey. You like there's a space. And it's just like what the fuck is that?

I've never heard anybody say things like this. And there's like the way he. There's going to be wrong with a minor. The way his lips don't touch when he makes the pee sound when he speaks. It's just all sorts of weird shit. And I'm like, dude, if I was conspiracy brain, he would be like the last person I would be trusting because he's so obviously a lizard person. I just think from the perspective of somebody who believes that stuff.

So like he's just fascinating to me. I just think he's autistic in a way that isn't charming at all. Yeah. He's like, he's like, he's charmlessly autistic. He's like autistic. He's like autistic like a like a piece of shit is ugly. He's like Sheldon. to me.

Like he's a Sheldon-esque figure. He's like Sheldon if he was stupid. Sheldon is kind of stupid. Like he knows a lot, but he's stupid, you know? He's knowledgeable, but he's knowledgeable,

but he's an idiot. Yeah. Yeah. Like there's, that's so fascinating that's a real type of, because you know exactly what I'm talking about

when I say that you're so autistic. You don't under, you're so smart that you're like, you're clearly intelligence came with neurodivergence, you know? Right.

You're like, I'm really intelligent, but I also can't, I can't, understand why people would change their color of my room while I'm not here. Why would my mother unfold my clothes and put it on this side of the room? I can't, I can't have this. I got to go sit a dog on fire.

Why would she move my creature cock? What's going on? The, yeah, like, there's, there's people who are like, there's, there's people who are like, like, knowledgeable or like, uh, but stupid. And then there's also, I think the reverse. There are people who are just like, there are people who like have a lot of common sense. and might not know anything. You know what I mean?

The best people are a combination of it, too. Yeah. Like, I think I have, like, I think I have, like, intelligent and,

and wise. Yeah, like, I think I have more common sense than I have, like, specific knowledge. But, like,

also don't think I need, like, there's certain things where it's like, you don't need to be mega educated to know that certain politicians are, like, paying lip service to you,

you know what I mean? Like, you don't need to study, you don't need to study Trump to know that he's, like, pandering to you. I think the idea is that

it's really good to be a combination of the two because of the fact that I think you can, I think you can't gain common sense. If you don't got that shit, you just don't have it. Yeah, I think it is like an evolutionary thing. I think you just kind of don't have it. And then you can gain a degree of like knowledge. You just have to learn how to study the right way because there's different forms of being

able to acquire knowledge based on who you are. Some people are never going to be able to open a book and be able to figure things out. Some people just can't do that. They just, it won't work for them. Some people have to learn by scenes we have learned by experiencing. That's how it is. And I think that's why, you know, we have so many people that are like, oh, I'm not good at school. It's like, well, no schools is not helping you learn, helping you learn how to, like, actually learn things.

Yeah. It's a huge problem. School's very outdated the way that we do it. I think, I think, I think genuinely it's done on purpose, though. I don't think it's not on purpose so much as, well, well, on purpose versus for what reason. Like, I think it might be done on purpose, but I think the purpose comes from the lack of will to really get into the nitty gritty of it and actually make it. Like, I'll put it this way. I don't think it's done purposely to, like, keep people stupid.

I know that that's like a conspiracy theory about it. I really think I understand. But that requires so much organization to be true. Like, it almost defies belief that somebody could be, all right, we're going to keep the American public stupid. So we're going to not put any effort into the American education. education system. I think that's like I understand the mentality of it. What I really think it is, it's that people believe themselves to be good guys. I think people think that they're right. And so they think actually like, no, if kids are actually more educated, they'll agree with me.

So what I actually think is happening, it's like, we want people to be more educated, but restructuring the entire system is such an arduous task that no one, everybody's too lazy to do it based on how much restructuring it would do. And also that awkward transitionary period between like, what are you going to do in like, you know, fifth grade and fourth grade where like, you know what I mean? Where it's less like, okay, this is how it works now.

And now like you've just, sorry. You know, like, it's the same thing with like student loan debts where it's like people are like, it's not that people don't like, I feel like people holistically would be like, yeah, I don't want to pay for fucking student loans. But because I paid for student loans, why shouldn't, you know what I mean?

I think it's that kind of The thing is I think it's so much more macro than like, I think the vast, vast majority of people are stupid. I think the people that are controlling to change are stupid too. So is this a bunch of idiots running around? Right. I think it's so far back to a problem that, like, the people that would change it are too stupid themselves to change it. I think they're like people there are like a select, like maybe like eight people in a room that are like, oh yeah, we're doing this on purpose.

But the people and everyone below has no clue that's like going on purpose. Yeah, I just think there's like no focus really. And also things change so frequently, but also so little changes. I think like, okay. Fix that though. I think all those things are approachable and under. Right, but they take time and nobody has patience anymore. I, I, like people are, like people are already like inflation's high under Biden.

So like what the we need Trump back? And it's like inflation was high because of COVID everywhere. And we're actually doing better than most people like most countries than every single country on the face. but people are impatient. They're like, why isn't it amazing? It's like because it takes time to do that. Like it's, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, yeah, it's, it's like, man, things are really great on a robot.

Like, Obama had like such a good economy and then like, and then like, and then people were like, we're having a good time, but like, I don't like it. It's not, it's not, it's not, we're not in space yet. Let's throw, let's throw somebody else in. And then Trump goes in and like spends like crazy and then fucks everything up. I don't know, man. It's, it's whatever. It's really, it's really,

an idea of people just being really, really, really horribly informed. Horribly informed, lazy, and impatient. And it's like a, it's like a massive mix. Is a snake eating itself through its own asshole? Yeah, it's a snake, it's a snake, it's a snake snorting its own dick. It's like, what's, I don't know, man, you could, I, I don't understand in this world anymore, like, how you could, you, like, I, Conservatism by its

By its nature is stupid It is I'm sorry people that are conservative I have respect for some of your policies When it comes to Probably actually nothing But Like I just don't understand

How you could think That is the right I respect what they think happens But like I just don't think it actually happens Like I too would be I too look around and be like What the fuck? Where are my taxes going?

Fucked like why the fuck should I Like I get that But then like I get that but then like my response I guess my response to it isn't so much that I'm paying so much and I'm getting nothing I don't want to pay anymore my thing is like well I'm paying so much already let me get something out of it and that's kind of my perspective of like healthcare and stuff where it's just like if I'm going to get reamed anyway at least let me like take the burden off my shoulders of being able to be like I'm going to go to the doctor you know and not worry about what that's going

to do to me at the very least like that would be worth the amount that I get reamed. I don't know. Every fucking April. I can say that the vast hundred people that are conservative tend to feign this this this belief in like Christianity and like loving God and stuff like that. And that's always confused me. And for me, it's like for you to for you to be a person that like that like has all this this love for your your almighty being, you know, you know so little about what it is to be of that religion, you know? Like the fundamental Yeah. Like,

like, like the whole abortion thing right for me, right? It is literally the idea of God understanding that you are not meant to judge others. Even in this book that's,

that's clearly fake and modified a billion and a half times. Yeah, yeah. I don't want to get into the... You know, it's just like these guys, these people are,

fucking morons. They're just like, it's like, I hate to be so crass and callous because I have relatives that are conservative and I have a few friends that have some,

conservative values, but they definitely wouldn't throw their hat into that. I think. And it's just like, you have to be actually a sniveling retard under a bridge. You got to be, you got to be as stupid as SpongeBob is fucking creative, you know? You got to be a fucking complete. Look, I don't know. I don't know. And I'm not, I'm, I, usually this is Derek saying this shit.

That's why I was, yeah. It's the one that says this. But for me, it's at the point now where you are just. you're outwardly choosing to do worse by the world by not objectively paying attention to what you see I guess the thing that I don't really understand is just like Disagree with the Democrats about things all you want But when it comes to people's people's existence

Choosing not to is choosing to just harm them is Evil at this moment you know I can't just be like I'm fine with this or whatever I disagree Because we've done that so much And then the problems that we have have existed because of that Yeah, yeah, no, I know. That's where it turns into that. I can't be a person that's like, ah, whatever anymore.

It's got to be like, you know, you're, you suck. You suck gold or moon. I guess the thing that sucks is that like that doesn't reach them. You know what I mean? Oh, no, because we don't because we're always going to fail. You're not going to be like, oh, you suck. And then the, the person's going to be like, oh, you're right, you know. I don't think it's about reaching them anymore.

Yeah. I think we're at the point. I think people can be reached, though. I think it's just like, I think no effort is being made because so many of them crazy but like I think there are people who are just like there because they just happen to be born there or just there because it's their surroundings I think most people can if if if if that person can turn that many people away from the KKK well that's a then like I I feel like that's worse right it's it's not it's not worse than what happens is this I feel like what what

what happens is this right those are people that are that don't have the information informed to them no per no no person that is right but they just need to be informed is what I'm saying but you can't inform these people because you try to inform them and then they combat you well they just have to combat them with really i understand what you're saying like i've watched i've watched the destiny debates i see i see how people just don't pay attention my heart in my heart i believe and this is me being hyperbolic opposed to my real heart right like in my spirit i think that you can when you tell people facts truthfully facts the they'll experience the truth eventually and they'll be like i'm kind of wrong yeah but my my anger is just like i'm done

trying to do that for you. You should do it yourself. Yeah. There's no reason why someone, like, I was born into a pretty decently good standing family where if I would have stayed in New York, I wouldn't have had to worry about any of these problems, you know? Yeah. And how can I see that? How can my grandma, who fundamentally all these things should be on her side, but she's like, no, that's insane. People should have their rights. You know? These are analogous to the same things that were happened for civil rights. It literally is the same like drawing points. Right. Where like, I don't want to call this person a person. It's like, do you understand how you sound? Do you get

yourself? Yeah. I'm done. I'm done. I'm stopped. Let's just let's go on. Let's move on next question. I don't think there are questions. Period. I think that's it. Our Patreon went blank. It went blank and now we quit the show. The show's over. Keep sending us your money though, Russ. We'll come and find you. That's crazy. You just insulted them. There's like a religious person in the audience. He's like, fuck you. Give me your money.

I'm sorry, man. I get it. Like, I understand. The frustration is there for sure. I don't know, man. I can't do that anymore. I hold religious beliefs still. Some of them, I think the,

I try to focus on the things that were good that I was taught in religion. Some people kindly, you know, understanding that the world is bigger than yourself, which is crazy because none of them act like that. Most, most part. But it's like. It's a lesson that's lost a little bit. You got to really figure out.

where you stand at the end of the end of things, you know? Papa Jesus. If Trump wins though, that'll be lit. I think it would be funny. Look, man, the way I'm looking at is like, I would prefer Kamala to win for obviously. I just want to be done with Trump, really. I'm just kind of tired. I'm bored of it.

Like, at the very least, get another Republican in here, so we have, like, new material. But, like, the whole, like, what are we doing? Like, I get it. Like, it's, I get it. It's the same thing over and over again. I'm tired. I'm bored. It would be cool to have just, like, a,

either a normal Republican Party again or at least if you're gonna get somebody just get somebody else. Just do somebody else. Just a new like refresh. Just bring us back to the old Republican Party where they're just like, let's just like. It feels like Dragon Ball Superwhere. It's just like, oh, it's Freeza again. All right. But it's not even fun.

It's either turning black and saying the N-word twice. Look, Freezes, look, Freezes a good villain, right? It's a good villain. Entertaining. But there are other ones. But like, come on. Like, I'm over it. Like, I, like, the best days are behind him. You know what I mean? You're not going to have, you're not going to have, like, you're not going to have a He Will Not Divide a moment again. You know what I mean? Like with that stupid fucking camera. You're not going to, like, it's, the jokes around him are just like it's, it's all old stuff. It's, it's not funny anymore. It's just alarming, you know? It turns into like, oh, this is like. It's just trite. It's played out. Like, I'm bored. And I would like, I would like new people. So, like, for me, it's just like, if Kamlo wins, like, hopefully that's the end of him. Hopefully he fucking has a heart attack and dies. And then we don't have to deal with this shit anymore. And we'll have a new set of fucking crazy.

people to deal with. I would much prefer that. But if not, then, you know, fuck, I get material. I went either way. I feel bad for the people who don't. But like... Yeah.

Unfortunately, we'll be fine and other people will be suffering and that sucks. Yeah, well... It really sucks. Fuck y'all niggas though. Papa Jesus wrote in. He says, hello.

Are we, we're recording tomorrow too, right? We should try to get... What day is it today? Tuesday. Yeah, we record tomorrow. So we just try to pump this one. I'll see if I can get to... to just like throw this one out real quick

just so we'll have like a pre and post election because we're this is on election day you know what I mean so the next day tomorrow we'll know or at least we'll have an idea of what's going what's going to happen so it'll be fun Papa Jesus wrote in we'll just do this one

and then we'll wrap up we'll find out which would be hilarious in the middle of people playing Japanese card games I'm like yeah fuck yeah yeah like oh nice yeah personally like my attack yeah my prediction is I think I think I think almost gonna win by

like by a margin that I think it's not I don't think she's going to it's going to be a landslide or anything but I think it's going to surprise mega people because I think mega people really think that like they're loud they're loud yeah they're just like I really think that they don't have a concept of how many people are just how many people exist outside of the internet who are just really tired of this um I think it's what dude I think it's why Joe Biden won you know it's like Joe Biden won't so uncharismatic it's crazy and he won because it's just people were just like yeah I'm fucking over it dude. I hope man I I think the entire world. I think it will shake out that way. If not, that's fine. It is what it is. I'll just make... I have a lot of videos.

I think that... It'll be fun. The conservative part... The country's gotten more conservative. I think that's happened. In certain aspects. Yeah, I think so. I think that a lot of...

I think he, a few steps he made with these, these... I will say that Puerto Rico joke fucked him up massively. The joke didn't help. Because I saw that on my family Twitter and it's just like... I know for a fact you had some of these. people before this. And like, I don't know, man. That's, that's, that's, seeing that in real time was pretty wild.

Yeah, dude. The Puerto Ricans in my family are all like, they were like, we've, the thing about me is that what sucks for my family is that the Puerto Ricans in my family are from New York. And New Yorkers can't stand him. Yeah. New York City people hate him. He can't do business there anymore if I'm not mistaken. Oh, I don't know.

I don't know about that. I know like Atlantic City he can't go there. He can't do business anymore. He's exempt. But a lot of things he just can't do and they're like, yeah, this guy sucks. Yeah. Anyway, Papa Jesus wrote and he says, hello again, you handsome homo ambrase. If you could physically change your co-host bodies in any way to annoy your inconvenience,

then what would you do? Person, I think it would be hilarious if Chris was slightly shorter but had a dick that was seven inches soft. That would suck. That's not a good. That's not good. That's not good. That's such, that would.

actually really damage me. That'd be debilitating because you would show that to a woman, they'd be like, no. Yeah. Because that happened. They're like, oh, no, I'm not a porn star. Don't get that out of here. I would, yeah. All right.

Or if Derek had skinny legs, but an even bigger ass. That's crazy. Derek's ass is so big. He's like jumped it forward in his seat. Yeah. He's about to fall off the whole time. That is crazy. I would make Chris.

really tall and I'd fuck up all your wardrobe. That really, like big and tall tall, tall. You'd be like, you'd be like my frame and like a little taller. Like so tall that I would, not only would I not have any use for my current clothes, but I couldn't reliably just go to H&M right now. Like I would have to go to like a tailor to get shit done. Like you'd have to, you'd have to effectively in your home be naked and so clothes got delivered to your house.

You'd be like, guys, I can't record. I can't wear anything in here. We're wearing like towels, I guess. That's what I would have to do. You'd have to record in a towel. No, your towel may be too. You'd have towels near your size. Big and tall towels.

That would suck. I would hate to, I honestly, I would hate to be taller than I am right now or shorter than am right now. Like, I feel like I'm so acoly. I'm so adept at this frame. You'd be walking. You'd hit things on your shoulders. You wouldn't know because you'd have a giant frame.

You would just, it would just ruin your life. It would be like logging into destiny. and my load out is completely different. And you're just like, fuck. Or just like my build is fucked. I'm just like, God damn it.

I had like a save. I knew what I was doing. I was so, I got into such a flow with this. And now I'm like, I'm definitely going to be hitting my head on things. I would, you know,

if you make me like smaller than Lily. I would. Like take me and it scale me down. Like size and everything. Yeah. I'm just like, I'm like as short as Lily is. Yeah.

I think I would, I would make it so you would no matter what you did you'd always lose a little bit of weight but it would only be here and so your face would still be the same your arms would still be the same and your legs would still be the same

but your torso would shrink exponentially I would just have like I would have abs in the same exact face and I'm like I don't like this what's the point of this you would look really wrong like you would look like you know those match games and Derek I think

well first of all Derek I would make I would make Derek white immediately I think that would bother him way more than well no it'd probably bother me more but it would bother him a lot The thing I think about him is like he would get in trouble Because he did He says the N word more than you do somehow

He does? Yes I've yeah yes he does I've noticed it because I remember I had to edit And I remember I had like a little counter on the side To entertain myself while I was edit it I never put it in the video because that's more editing Fuck you But like

But like I remember like he's So he says it a lot. But, like, I also feel like it would really conflict with him because he is so, like, he's so metal-oriented that, like, I wonder if, like, he would, I feel like he would have a crisis of identity where it's like, I really could just, like, I really could just throw myself into this other aspect of my personality and, like, betray that half of me, you know. V, turning someone a different race is so stupid, but also so fucking. horrible at the same time. What do you mean? Because it's like if I just turned you into a fucking black man

Your life would change And you would know you would know the changes that are inbound too And you'd be like This is gonna suck Yeah My sense of humor can't be the same way it is Well I It can't

I don't know Chris it can't You can obviously say something Why not? Especially your inner person The way I know you can't be like that anymore What do you mean? Why not?

Because you're very apathetic on the surface and that would be really fucking bad as a black person Would it? Yes What do you mean? Because you'd like make a joke

about something And then you'd be like Oh man Is that destructive? Is that destructive that I made this joke? No, I think I think I could finally I have so many tweets in my drafts

I could finally tweet You'd be able to tweet those tweets out right? Yeah, yeah And you'd be like Oh I don't work it It wasn't worth it. You're like getting the golden ticket and being like, oh, I got a gobstop or that's it.

I got a candy that just doesn't go away. I don't know, man. I think I'd make the most out of it. You'd make the most out of it if you have to. Or you'd kill yourself. I would make the most out of it. I have so many, like even just like yesterday, like the Matt Walsh. I tweeted out a nicer version of it today or like last night or whatever.

But like the first thing that I wrote out in my Twitter and put in my dress was like, this N-word's gay. I would if I was if I was gay I would tweet the F word so much should be crazy I thought about going on a date with a guy just so I could say it that's you know what I mean I wouldn't have like gone far that shows how terrible we are like we're terrible people like we're like we're filth we're filth we're scum that like to think like I want to say this word so bad that I will betray myself yeah whatever yeah that's insane

I mean, I don't care. That's insane. I don't owe myself nothing. You see, that's even more insane. That files back into it. I don't know. It's like for a joke, I'll go and I'll say something really terrible just to get the shits and giggles.

Yeah. And that's bad. But we're also addicted to making ourselves laugh. Yeah, it is a problem. It's a really bad problem. It's a problem to the point where, like, I remember getting into accidental arguments. Because I didn't realize that they'd believed, like, that they, I've been in arguments with people where they thought I was, like,

actually saying the things I was saying, which is a dumb sentence, I understand. But, like, I say things to amuse myself and only to amuse myself. And I get in trouble for it sometimes, just because, like, people start to believe, like, I remember, I was at a party, I was at a party recently. I was at a birthday party for a friend of, a friend of ours, a comedian friend. And she was like, I saw Bella there. And he was like, oh, Bella. It's like, I, I'm, I usually, like, gravitate towards the people I know at parties because they're just like I don't know these fucking people I let people like approach and like kind of that's how I meet people it's like I'm talking with somebody else somebody either approaches me or them and then like you know what I mean that's how then and then the circle grows or whatever but I was there and the person whose birthday was like oh how do you guys know each other to to to Bella and me and I said oh it went to pre immediately without thinking about it's like we went to preschool together I immediately says like we would like without even a second fucking thought that's not true at all

but she said like oh yeah I went to preachers together and then Bella was like yeah she felt like she got roped into it and then at least and she would and the girl who's party was it was like wait I thought you were East Coast and he's like yeah I was there for like

it became like a whole snowboard a snowball and now this person's wrapped into it yeah and she just doesn't want to be a part of it you're like you could have just telling the truth she was drunk too she was drunk too so it's like stress So she was like, I was clearly stressing her out.

Because she thought everything that she knew about, like, both of us were like wrong somehow. But it was just such an impulse. It helps me feel comfortable because I'm just like improvising. You're a piece of shit. So you're taking other people's comfortability for yourself. You're selfishly. You're selfishly. I just, I like to improv with people.

And I think people, like, the people that know me enough know that I do that. So like I'm just used to doing it. So with strangers who don't know and think I'm just earnestly telling them stories about my life, like it's jarring. And they find out you're lying like, what the fuck's wrong with this guy? We have me, we, to be fair, we, I saw it falling. I saw it like snowballing into this crazy. I was like, no, no, no, we like we just met online. We didn't go to, like I, I, I squashed it quicker than I would have in the past.

In the past, I would have just led that linger until the next time I saw them. You know what I mean? Because it's like, it's not a hard. from you learn that from Zach I learned that from Zach and my dad to be honest with you like my dad would do that my dad used to pretend normally I would care about this

him getting canceled but like he's retired so he's safe but like to embarrass me he would like if it was just me and him at like Walmart he would pretend to be special needs if I was getting on his nerves like if I was bothering him or like

if I was being annoying he would immediately like slip into like retard speak and like pretend to be like a nuisance to make a problem for me this is my father is it is your sister like that too is it genetic is it my I don't know if my sister's is that they just are you for are you are you are you friends with your sister I think so yeah like not not to like not to the degree that I am with like you guys I guess or like Jalen because I don't see them that often because I'm not friends on my sister I'm friends with I would say I'm pretty friendly with my sister

I love her. We're very cordial, but I'm not friends with her. Like, I can't, like, I can't be myself in front of my sister. Dude. Because she'll be like, are you insane? It would, I wouldn't be myself to this degree, but I would, I would be more myself than you would expect, I guess. I can't be yourself. I can't, I hate about something like my grandmother. My grandmother was like, if my grandmother knew what I was, she would have had to be

exercised. I would never have them listen. I would never have them listen to my podcast and I would never want them to. but it would just be less I guess the stuff that I would say would be less like sexual I guess it would be less that it would be less vulgar in that way but it would still be the same type of stuff like I remember like tumbling down the stairs backwards

once in my house when my sister was living with us because she was like living with us for like a brief period of time before she got her own place and I felt like my knee I dislocated my knee running up the stairs because I was like for some reason I was like let me see how many stairs I could skip you know what I mean

It's one of those. Just to entertain myself walking up the stairs. And then, like, I popped. I remember, like, stretching in a weird way. And it's like, that feels weird. And then popped out. And then I fell backwards down the stairs. And I was like, ah.

And then my sister walks into the hallway, turns around. And I'm just, like, sitting there holding my knee like, fuck. And she goes, are you lying? Is this a bit? I have never, by the way, I have never done a bit like that. I have never pranked her. She used to trip me. She used to trip me down the stairs.

Is she way older than you? Yes. She's like 15 years older. She's like almost 50, I think. It's crazy. But like it's weird. Like my relationship with my sister's weird because she is like my aunt kind of because her siblings are like my siblings.

But she is also very much my sister. It's the same thing with me. My niece is, I spoke to my niece a few days ago and she's 24. now, which is fucking insane to think about. Because like, obviously, I haven't spoken to turn to quite a bit, but like, they're still the babies in your mind. You know, they're still like, oh, this is my little, my little niece, you know, like a baby in my brain. Yeah.

And then hearing, seeing her like, oh, yeah, like, I'm going to grad school next year. Like, I'm trying to find my own place. And I'm like, what? Yeah. What is this? Yeah. And then he says a baby already. So, like, what is, I'm just, it's this fucking freaky to me.

It's, it's, what's happening? And just having. Cox her, I'm friends with her. She's my fucking friend. Like, I laugh. I send her fucked up jokes that I send you guys to her. I would never. And she's like Uncle Kingston, I'm at work. Like, if I open this randomly at work, because my friend Ben, one time he opened one of the memes I said to him. He should never do that. And the N-word blared out. And he was just like, no. At work. At work. He's like, no. But she's like, Kingston, I can't open these around people. Like, is this funny? And I can laugh at it privately. But like, I'm like a studious

I can't you can't bring this to me right now. Yeah. This is like at home and we're like Thanksgiving. We're all laugh at something like that. But other than that, you can't do that. And I think it's insane because for us, we haven't had the thing to make us like grow up yet. So we're still just jackasses.

Yeah. Anyway. Which is dope. Yeah. We're going to read, uh, we're going to read our $25 and up patrons now. By the way, I don't think I mentioned this on the last episode,

but since she came up, my sister. So we have a family kind of thing going on. Her husband has pancreatic cancer. I have like a go fund me up. It reached the goal already, which is insane. Like I shared it like one night and just like everybody, a lot of internet friends shared it. Justin Wang, other people. Really appreciate it. The link's still up. If you want to support that would be that would mean a lot to my family. It is at, uh, it is I don't remember the link exactly. But if you go to my Twitter, Chris R. Gunn, like my shadow band one, unfortunately. Uh, It's the pin tweet so you can go over there and toss a buck if you want.

We would appreciate it. She's very appreciative that it hit the goal already. But, you know, that shit is, it doesn't get cheaper. You know what I mean? There's definitely not going to be like money left over for cancer stuff. It's very good that they caught it so early, though. Thank goodness. They caught it.

Yeah. Yeah, we'll see. I'm, you know. High hopes. High hopes. Yeah. Let's go. Let's count me down.

Three, two. 2.1. Flexing being a day one listener, like a Destiny veteran, Flex is playing the D1 beta when sharing a bad opinion. Listen, man, I should, I played the alpha.

I played the D1 alpha, dude, in Joe's basement. I remember. That was fucking exciting, man. Dude, playing Destiny, seeing you guys play Destiny and is being confused at first? I was like, what is going?

There are orts? Huh? Dude, when I was, I'm playing, obviously I'm playing Black Up 6 right now and there's like the zombies mode right? I haven't played called duty zombies since literally World at War it is

jarring as fuck now. I can't imagine. It's like borderlands and you're like, huh? It's awesome. It's like really fucking cool but also like huh? What the fuck did they do? This is like no no shade. It's really

cool what they've done to it. Like I'm actually like really into it. Me and Lyle and Kyle were playing last night. It was really fun. But like also like what the... This is, this would have given me a heart attack. If I had never seen it, it's like, what the fuck? This is not what I remember.

But yeah, Destiny 1 must have been mega confusing. I mean, Destiny 2 is confusing if you don't know it. So, uh, what the fuck is that? George Cachiopo? Be like fondle my sack boy. Darth Beiner. Welcome. Terrifying.

What do you think about that, Derek? I'm fucking good. Nice. Comedy shorts, rapist ass Shaggy and his little companion Roofie do.

Uh, you ever listen to a medal? Leave him alone. What do you mean? You don't like puppet Derek? I have a white wife. Derek, what do you think about that?

What do you think about UFC? I jerk off to it. That's amazing. This is so petty. This is so petty. Because we have the episodes without you. We don't make fun of you an episode. Yeah, but it's,

I don't know. There's something funny about... The idea of it being like right there and he's not there is crazy. It's funny that we should all have the commission. By the way, you're free to do that. I never like, there was no rule that said like you can't make fun. It's just silly. Like, we're not going to do that.

That's not nice. And then you're like, no, I'm Derek. I'm gay. My wife. I have, I have, I have, I have, uh, I have gauges because I put my dick in my ear. So me. All right. The sinister photo of Jeff Bezos eating in iguana.

Is that real? Uh, we played the hammer game again. Yeah, he's dead as fuck. Uh, hey, Jeannie. Uh, I wish that every single pubic hair on planet Earth turns into a solifuge. That's insane. I don't know what that is. What do you think about that, Derek?

What do you think about dead? religion's dumb What makes it worse Is that you and I What we do is make fun of people Yeah That's all we do in tandem So

Lily's like a hey when Chris is here Because all you guys do is make fun of me And I'm like Don't be so easy to make fun of Lily What the fuck? She shoots at me more than anything Oh yeah of course

Because you've made fun of her Now she's scorn Well tough tough shit Uh Hey, what is it? Hey, Jeannie. Okay, okay. Sleez merchant Joe Biden's birthday cake burning the White House down. There will become starring Daniel gay penis. That's dumb. Sweeney is just christened his Ozhar reform. Kumplings. Sweeney uses knitting wool to floss. Why are you guys attacking me? That is crazy. That is just not nice. My wife is white. Sweeney Sweeney using

Jesus Christ In a row Sweeney is Sweeney using The microphone cord To floss the gap between his teeth You guys got to chill, man All right guys I get it, all right

You can stop Stop being in front of my brother this way That's mean Stop being fun of my brother My brother My brother So stupid 55 hour energy

Wait, oh five five hour energies in a row. 55 hour energy is crazy. That is insane. Do you think at a certain point you wouldn't be to sleep anymore? Yo, that reminds me of a metal band. That reminds me my favorite man.

Penish on the lips. They're really good, man. They have really good guitar. Five five hour energies in a row. Unlock the gauging. Domo Nation. Vaughn of the Dead. Call J. Gay,

called J. Gay Wentworth 877 Dick now. After the recent Superman B.S. Sweeney's no longer ran on most topics. If Young Metro didn't trust you, he going to rape you allegedly. Chris and Sween have the patience of Saintsman arguing with Derek. Morrowind is the second best Western RPG. Please play. I don't know, man. It's so old now.

It's, look, it's hard to play those games. Cotor is, I say. somehow managed to enjoy it. But, like, I can't imagine that it's going to be the case for most people. I think about Kotor is that, like, the Star Wars world is really cool outside of the Skywalker bullshit. Yeah. Like, as soon as you remove the Skywalker bullshit, you realize how much is going on.

I think the Skywalker is cool. Yeah, I think the Skywalker stuff is probably the lamest part of it, to be honest. I mean, maybe not the lamest. It's the least, it's one of the more less interesting parts of it to me. Like, I think Jedi are cool, but the fact that there's this main character is, like, Like, uh, lame. I actually so much more interested in the sci-fi parts of it. Like the Jedi, I get it.

There's some, there's some fucking weird shit in that universe, man. What, the expanded universe that they uncanonized? I get why they did it. It was, it went on too long, you know? Yeah. They had like 45 years of, like, the shit. They were just writing and writing. How do you feel about the fact that, like, people, like, with those stories, like,

does it bother you that those are uncanonized? Yeah, it bothers me because there's a few moments where I think they're, like, awesome. Like, I think, uh, Sith Javit, I'm not Sith, Luke is insanely cool idea. Uh-huh. The idea of Luke is that they all have the tendency towards the dark side. Did that happen? Yeah.

He's actually Palpatine's apprentice. Because Palpatine comes back in the other series later on. Because the whole time during the clone stuff, that's what he was trying to, was trying to clone a Jedi. He was like, I'm trying to clone my body. I'm old right now. When I was younger, I would have been able to dog walk anyone here. So he clones himself.

He comes back. Luke fights him. Luke gets anally assassinated pretty much And then he's like You'll be my you'll be my Seth I got you I'll do better than what you're doing with your father And to Luke is like I'm gonna go under

I have to go under colors If I'm not with him though pull him back He's gonna do fuck shit So he goes and become the princess And he starts tweaking He starts like oh shit Like maybe there is a thing to this dark side shit Because I can make a different

I can make it change He starts like doing fuck shit Yeah And I think that's a cool idea These are all a bunch of cool ideas that they had, but the problem is that I guess what I'm saying is like, does it, does it bother you in a deep sense that

they're not canon, despite the fact that you've already read them and there's still stories that you've attached yourself to? They're still there. Yeah, that's kind of because I think about like, Halo sometimes and I'm like, I want them to canonize a lot of this stuff. Like, all the four under mystery stuff being revealed is like, get rid of that. You know, all of the stuff

I love about Star Wars with Spider-Man and all those things, they're still around. Oh, shit. Lily just walked in. The chair. moves back and it moves forward. I would scream and jump out your window. That's great.

I'm not tall enough to kick it. I would scream. I would scream and jump out the fucking window. I'm like, you can see ghosts. Lily, how are you doing? Do it. Go ahead. Take a step.

They just step. They just step. They're doing it. Be dimendive to your own people. Go ahead. Please. What do you mean? I was listening to her.

You just ignored her. Oh, go back. Oh, yeah, Kingston. Please clean the bathroom. I asked you three. times. I've asked you three times. All right.

Otra Ves again. Please hurry up and do it. Otra Vez. All right. My family's from Mexico. Interesting. Where's that? It's below America.

Great. But below. All right. Jeez. We're going to be a guest again. We got to have a run-up out of guests. Yeah, she is. Right.

leave the fucking names All right Going to do heinous shit To Loose the Vatican Church's Anime Girl mascot Is that real? I saw that going around I don't know how real that was though

It wouldn't surprise me anymore We're living in such a fucking joke clown world Blair White Canonically banging me please Hannibal Lecter politely asking to suck your dick I voted for Andrew Tate No one can stop me Will Graham

pissing in Hannibal's mouth than giving him a piss kink. Gay Leno dressing up as Jay Leno for Halloween. Death. Jack the world's fastest. Maui. I'm still going to say Maori to me honestly. Asking 15 questions in the hope that one is answered.

Maybe one day. That's probably why there's so many fucking questions. It's one guy. It's just five people asking 200 of them. Extra ammo idea rank. Oh, rank every hot female extra in Spider-Man 2. Are there that are there? What do you?

Oh, like, wait, Extra. Extra implies movie. So like the, like the film? Were there that many hot ones? Yeah, like, I remember Spider-Man 3. Wait, is it Spider-Man? Yeah, where he swings over and that,

oh, no, maybe it is two. I can't remember which shot it's from, but like the, where Spider-Man swings over and it's just like a camera underneath these two women. Yeah. I remember that. But I don't remember it being. particularly...

Who was particularly hot in that movie, I guess? I never thought Kirsten Dant was hot. Ever. I never thought she was hot. I think what's her name is attractive? The girl from the blonde, he's a redhead in real life, but she's in three... Betty Brin? No, she plays, she plays... Gwen?

Gwen, yeah. Oh, is that? That's not free Larson, isn't it? Dallas Howard, Bryce. Brice Dallas Howard. Yeah, he's attractive. But, um... Yeah, I mean, I don't think those movies were particular, like, I don't think there was the point.

Yeah, I think everyone was just like, that was the point. Except for her, literally. Yeah, I think there's, there's a lot. supposed to, yeah, she's literally a model. Yeah, that's it. That's the only one that, like, six, I'm like, um. Anyway, big meaty stinks. My human taxidermy fleshlight and dildo business will pop off, trust me.

Andy, the man whose handies are now eight here, but not as dandy. Dragon Age, but the canary are all talk like Stallone. I'm non-binary. Yeah, I'm non-binary now. Yeah, I mean, I'm not really a man or woman. I don't really fit within the society's gender roles because they're stupid, which, uh, Kingston, the person narrating me does really agree. they are very retarded.

That's crazy. That's so fucking. That's layered. Why is Kingston insecure about his teeth and not because his eyes blink out of time with each other? Don't tell me. That's so crazy. Is that real? Wait, look at me.

I don't. No, I don't know. Stop. I don't want to talk about that. I guess we have the recording. I've always wanted to be able to do that on purpose. But it's so hard. One of my eyes twitches a lot.

I just end up looking like I'm winking. because, like, my, I can't, I can't, I can't close one eye without, like, forcing my entire face to change. You know, people can blink really fast? I was like, how do you do that? I've never met anybody who could do that. Really? Not that I've noticed, anyway. Maybe they're blinking so fast I can't see.

Darkness. That's so fucked up. Heath Smoker, there's no way that's true, though, by the way. I would have noticed it and picked you apart for it already. Oh, thanks. That's like how like people, I don't know if anybody notices, but like I'm short. You know what I mean? Oh, really?

It took a while for people to notice. Maybe online. Online, yeah. Yeah, because I look lanky. You look. Like independently, if I'm on a, in a frame by myself, I look like a lanky person. A lanky short person. How does that work?

I don't know. What does that? It means you can scale me the fuck up, no matter what. I think scaling. I'm sorry. I did a scale up of you in my brain, and I just extended your neck. That's insane. If you scaled me up, like, my body would look normal for a while,

but my head would be hilariously large. Really? It would be jarring. That would be a jarring. If you just scaled the body up, like, drag the top right thing in Photoshop, it would be really, like, my body would look fine for a while, but like my head would have been immediately too big. Heath Smoker is off to Vegas.

Gids. What if YouTube existed during slavery with their research? slave review channels question mark yes the weed uh the weed of olympus coward the couragely dog i like that one evil chris raygon loves cat black i mean courage is like he's kind of he's kind of courageous yeah he like so so it would wouldn't that just be the show it would just be his his name would just be coward now that's it yeah oh coward and it actually be a coward yeah yeah he wouldn't help them he would run away Every episode would be him fleeing the scene, the second something.

It would be him attempting to be brave and running away. It would be him waking up calmly in the morning and running away. Before the freak comes to the door, like before the lightning strikes or before like a fucking ghost shows up, he would just abandon because he just is so anxious. They're so impoverished. They have to stay there. Isn't that crazy? They're so impover.

They're in the middle of nowhere as elders. Yeah. Where are their children? Fuck it. No way they had any. Muriel can't be fertile No possible Infertil mirrodle

And in my hour of darkness He is jerking right in front of me Taking loads of his come Let it pre and it cuts off Kevin Durant's feet The South is the best region of hip hop by far Relinquishy contents of ye pockets brev Or thou shalt shove a man up Mr. Pants

Y'all played the new Destiny dungeon No I haven't played Destiny in a while I'm behind behind I think I'm done with it though Yeah I'm just satisfied game, I'll see. I'm looking forward to Marathon. I've heard good things about it. I haven't played any extraction shooters, really.

And I think Bungy, like, if Bungy does it, I'll go try it generally. Because, like, I didn't really like first person shooters, really, until Halo. I didn't really like looter shooters until, like, Borderlands was okay. But, like, Destiny really, like, cemented that shit for me for, like, MMOs and looters shooter. So I think they could do the same for, I think they could do the same for extraction shooters. I just don't really know that much about it.

them. Word word. Y'all play the new... Yeah, okay. A beverage of sorts. God damn it. Can't escape this shit. Cardboard pie. The Nautiloids Eldridge, Nautilussi. By Curious George.

You dare bring light into my layer. You must die. Jolly old dipshit. Chris's favorite band, Guy's whitest... What? Guys whitest? Whitensed?

My ass? I don't know. I feel like that. like I should understand it, but I don't. Niggie with the skibbitty-risy. That story where you had to tell a friend, that story you had to tell a friend that trespassing was dangerous, sounded smoky-coded,

showing someone from 1940s, showing someone from 1940, Piper Perry getting ruined by a pack of big dick deviance. They would probably lose their mind. Modern porn would wreck somebody in the 40s. Modern porn would make them create a time machine. Yeah, they would figure it out of it.

We have to go there. We have to go there. We have to see this in person. We have to see this happen now. Find out if Kevin Cotton Coles, I forgot about this. Find out if Kevin Cotton Coles survives his next bout in the final issue of shirtman versus pizza time. Hunter Dubois, Hunter Dubois, gay bar shanty man, piano man. Give us your dong.

You're the penis man. Give us your dong to nine. because we're all in the mood for a big old D and you've got us something that cuts out Remember to tug me by my balls Open your jaws and make me wetter The Gatles

The Beatles, the Beatles but gay Oh word? Word? No way, facts Rise against is the use for straight men Smitchie the kid, Chris Where's the Halo TV show video? Don't worry

You guys are gonna get sick of me in November, don't they? that much. Don't worry. It's not going to happen. Don't worry. I'm not going to do it. You'll see. She pipkin on my Pippa, click the wrong button, and sub down it here. I'm back. Welcome back. Sweeney showers and sneakers. No way I'm hanging out with a couple of gooners. I'm just here so I don't get killed.

British people come and be like, what's all this then? Putting get in bait. Putting get in baby formula at Walmart. Is that what that? means? I think it means putting fend. Putting f, why is you right or right get?

Mistake. I think F is near G, right? Yeah. And they probably auto corrected. That's just a fucking wild. Jesus Christ. Reading this is a nightmare. I'm dyslexic so my brain help.

I'm so dyslexic in my brain help me figure that out. Yeah, yeah. I saved them. Pulled out 20 years late in the sloppiest way possible. Call that bitch Afghanistan. Chris was right. American Dad is pretty funny. Roger is not as annoying as you said.

Yeah, I don't know. I mean, to be fair, like my barometer for American Dad episodes is from like literally 2011 so that's what I'm remembering but I've seen clips of it recently then I'm like this this looks kind of funny like uh I don't know but I I don't even know where I would see that show it's on Hulu right I guess that's one I don't have so I don't want to have Hulu my girlfriend loves it she's like I love rom-coms and I'm like Hulu sucks it's got a lot of animation though I think Hary Arnold's on there and stuff like that yeah I just don't I'm not watching Hay Arnold anymore I watch Yonraud my friend Herald is really good like Heyano's just like a damn good show honestly I watch

underrated by a lot, I think. It wasn't on for a long time, that's why. I think people just don't talk about it when it comes to cartoons because it's just so grounded. And so it just doesn't feel like a cartoon. We do a lot of people. It just feels like a show. And so like, I don't know. Transfram Gremlin, Yush, Majin, Leon Kennedy, that'd be fucking dangerous.

A scuba tank filled with fart gas. You would die. That's so fucked up. You would die instantly, too. They would be so little time. You would have to choose. Am I going to drown or am I going to inhale farts until I die? I'm trying to drown, I guess.

You know, there's nobility in drowning, you know? There's a nobility that's not. There's a nobility that's not suffocating and fart for you. Exactly. Like, between the two, you can't have that written about you, man. I would so much rather see Chris Ramaldon that have drowned than Chris Ramonato suffocated on farts until he died. And then floated to the top Because he was so full of fucking gas

Craig the Canadian Die Monster WMB Made me want to shit my pants It's your boy, Shawnee D Serber's agent 267 Fun fact, the human race will not go extinct in your lifetime I don't think so That would be dope as fuck though

Is that it does? Oh, I mean no I dreamed that Goku was late For Gohan's birthday with no person So he came inside a condom And gave it to him 3XO letting you know there's a character there's a character named

Peterman and a character who is trafficked a comical amount in the same arc of one piece I don't know what any of that means Sherrod Brown he's gonna fuck your mom make your dad trans and eat your pets slurping stroke and smoking joking emoticons going like this 800's YouTube be like Civil War Civil War situation is crazy

Hey Sweeney look up that video of Brad Pitt speaking patois for the movie Meet Joe Black. I've never seen that. Obie won't you blow me? I beat him off, suck his penis, just to show that I am gay. Kremlin de Gremlin, 50 cent to 50 cent blood in my piss. Chunli pulling a Sophia Yorista on my face.

Why is the snartank gay and retarded? At least one ant in the shape of a human. One human ant. Solid snake voice. Hey, Colonel. Ryden gives really good head. What the fuck did you just say to me? There's no cleverness in that.

Wageley 583 Papini Brothers Emporium Presents Galactic Food Review, Vigida's Galactic Food Review YouTube channel. And the last page, Donk, Dawkinson, Oit Ui, be a good cunt in the back of a boogututut, De Beppo. Come about somebody called. Somebody, you wrote into the fucking into sacred and Colin had to read this name. Normal. With no context. Like Collins voice, too. Yeah.

Gade 6. Shrek 2. I need a quiro. I'm holding onto some penis till the end of the night. It's got to be long and it's got to be thick. That's where cuts out. P.P. I got a bussy so tight like catamite.

He got a hog so fat like Tiamat. I don't know what any of that means. Tiamat's a dragon god. I think catamite's a, I don't know, fucking ketamine god. The god of ketamine catamine catamate. The guy of cadamete and dungeons and dragons. Catamisticles. Fucking, that's insane.

Todd Bowles. Todd Bowles is a pussy. I don't know what that is. Damn. Sorry, Todd. Sorry, Todd. Get fucked. The name is sex.

Gay sex. Of course. Nice. Me'd be fishy. I 360 no scope. JFK. John Strickland. I will, in fact,

be wearing a suit and tie to the Super Bowl. Merck's 18-A. What if it really was an accident? Remember we were talking about that with a, With a, I forgot his name. He's one of our friends. He lives. He's one of our friends. Evon.

Evan. Evan. We don't know an Evan. What the hell are you talking about? He was a consecrated for a bit. I forgot his name. A Hispanic. He came over to our house when everybody came over that one time.

You were talking about the, it was, it was, uh, Hispanic. Emmett, right? Oh, Emmett. Oh, that's, I saw him at one of our shows recently. Oh, really? Yeah. I got a, I got a message him again. I've seen him in a while.

He's got a different channel. He's got like a, a, he's got like a, He kind of did a different, like he's got a whole different online. If you're listening, find me. Yeah, head us up.

Because like I don't, like you were cool. I would like to chill with you again. Head us up. You're always welcome to my home. Yeah. Please don't have gone crazy. I liked you a lot.

He didn't have gone crazy. I'm happy to say. He's very normal. Okay. Him and vernaculous were the two people who are just like, you guys are fucking sane, thank God. John Strickland,

I will, I will, uh, in fact, be wearing a suit and tie to the Super Bowl. Merck's 1889 Scalped 69

Riley Reed fleshlights to resell now that she's quit porn Did she quit? When? Like a few years ago

Yeah I mean Whatever There's so much So much So much content you already Yeah We're not I'm set

I'm good I'm good I own it I own because I bought it Yeah The first What would take For you to buy a porn

What would take Do you like Purchase a porn? What do you mean? What it takes you to like purchase a porn video? Like, I'm going to go and I'm going to purchase this. Um,

I would just have to be like really curious. I don't think it would take much for me. I honestly don't think it would really. Especially because like... It has to be something that I've never seen before for me to even think about like, oh, buy this. At a certain point,

like when you're doing really well, you're like, eh. I guess. You know? I don't think I've, I, I,

I had porn a premium for a month. I feel like Me and my friends To pull together money Yeah To buy like get a browsers account For like two months I did

You're in high school And I'm just like This is too much Yeah it's I just found that like I just don't like high deaf porn really And that's really all you get with it So I was just like

I'm fine with the free shit It was too much Yeah At 16 having unlimited porn It's not It's too much I've only spent money on porn Like twice

And it was that And then Somewhat recently in like the last year to like figure out how only fans worked because I wasn't sure like how people were doing it

I don't really understand like the model because it's very weird Only fans is strange and so like you think it's one thing you think it's like Patreon but it's not really

like it's not it is but this is exactly why I put like I put like $10 in and I was like let me just like subscribe to like

three different people to just see like what they're like how are they gonna there's just random fucking people like the first three people that I think I saw

and then So they send you messages. So you subscribe, I guess, with like, let's say like four bucks or whatever. And then like you get messages and certain messages have like unlocks. So you pay to unlock the message. So you get you pay to get access to the messages that you then pay to unlock. Which I did not realize.

I would have just like, I would have just been like, oh, hey, fucking welcome. Oh, you're here. Here's the stuff. Which would have been stupid. So it was actually money well spent. but I can't imagine I can't imagine paying

paying for porn to jerk off to It feels dubious Yeah I don't know There's just so much How do you run out How do you run out

Of free porn is the thing Ah whatever It's avarice Averis First search of key David presents Chris getting Malled

By a pack of vicious Chihuahuas Because he refused To kick them A pack of them Could get me I think

I think 1,400 Chihuahuas would get me. I think way less it would take but I think I want to... No, but what I'm saying is that certainly.

Oh, like it, absolutely. Yeah. What do you think? What do you think the maximum amount of Chihuahua like,

or the minimum amount of Chihuahuas that would like... Be able to really hurt me? Yeah. Maybe like 50? 50 you think? 50 could like actually hurt me. I guess so.

Not kill me, but like you could hurt me for sure. It's like a death of a thousand cuts type situation, I guess. First is keep going for my throat. Like they kept going for this. Same little bit.

Like one like dinks me a little bit. Another one to try to just go there again and say, keep trying to get me. And I'm like, ah, it's breaking through. I feel it. It's starting to sting now. It's fucking ridiculous. Miles Rouse's father is actually just the president of the CSA in Blackface. It's crazy.

Pre-Raz spread your cheeks so I can shit in your ass, Blake 896. Radiohead, nice peen. Back off Brat summer. It's time for Liam Payne Fall. Red versus Blue had more lower accurate fight scenes than Halo 5. That's actually true. Yeah, it has insanely true. ridiculous ones in redros of blue.

Yeah. Yeah. It's actually so real. The last No. Phil Tras, Texas State decided. Young Sheldon getting hit by 50 cars.

Tick all my ass here is Niggy Jizzy, formerly known as Nicky Ziggy. Sexbox. Sexbox 3, Titty. Sexbox 1. Sexbox series, sex. The N-word blasting through my speakers

because my earbuds weren't connected. Sorry, Miss Jackson, badly brave. Dr. Gay. Dr. Gay is new. Etherian, Brigerian, Nafram, Melfast one, and rounding out our list as always, King of Hap Hazard.

Yeah. Thank you guys. Don't forget to go vote. Yeah, go vote. It's too late by the time you're hearing this. Oh, yeah, it'll be, it'll be, oh, yeah. Go commit fraud. Whatever. Don't commit voters fraud.

Don't commit voter fraud. Don't have a machete outside of a voting booth. Don't burn. Yeah, and guys, don't, I understand it seems silly and it might seem like, oh, I'm getting persecuted it. You cannot wear shit. you cannot wear your fucking hats and shirts, your political hats and shirts in certain places.

Like that's actually, that is actually a rule. You can't. So I've seen people like, oh, they're persecutting. It's like, no,

you just can't do it. And you guys are the only people wearing hats. That's what I was having a conversation. I was playing, I was playing freaking Digimon, right? Mm-hmm. And some guy was like talking about like all the stuff. And he's like,

this is a public place that's, we able to talk about what it's like, things are public. But what happens is that there's terms of agreement when you enter a place. Yeah, there's like, I think they're stupid too. Like,

who gives a shit really if you're wearing a fucking hat? But like, it's the rules. And so, like, I don't know, man. Either follow the rules or don't, you know. Yeah. Or don't be there. So we'll see you in the next episode. We'll record it very soon.

Should be interesting. We'll know at least how the election is going to shake up. So in the meantime, take care. I'm fucking gay. I'm so gay. I love Midland. I'm gay. I'm sorry.

We'll see you next time.