The Snark Tank - #286: Into The Scatter-Verse

Episode Date: December 16, 2024

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It's an SOS from your kidneys, and it doesn't sound like music at all. It's silent. High blood pressure, type 2 diabetes, and other risk factors can quietly stress the kidneys, leading to negative impacts on the heart. That's what you should ask your doctor about a simple urine test called UACR. Most missed the signal for hidden kidney disease and related heart risk. You shouldn't. Visit DetecttheS.com today to learn more. that's your shirt oh yeah that's not your skin it's your shirt oh yeah oh yeah welcome to the stark tech podcast welcome welcome welcome welcome welcome welcome it's him tom swine it's him derrick uh derrick uh derrick blackman uh iron cousin oh yeah same same go on over to patreon

go over to patreon dot dot slash star tank i'm sorry um iron chef is the best show on planet Earth. I don't care of what Iron Chef. I don't know what Iron Chef is. It's crazy. So, crazy. What is it? Bro, it would suck.

So it's a cooking competition, right? You have the Iron Chefs that are a part of Kitchen Stadium and a chairman Kaga who looks like, even though he's Japanese, he looks like he'd be the father of Wilmer Waldorama, you know, a fan. It's a weird thing. Yeah, it's a weird thing. They have very similar features. So when I was a kid, I'm like, are them niggas related?

and then clearly they're not, this guy's speaking Japanese and the other guy's clearly some... He's Mexican. He's Mexican or Venezuelan or the two. He's something that I'm just... Heldarama is definitely like one of the... That's not a Mexican name.

It's Spanish for sure. Yeah, it's a Spanish name, but I don't... I just don't know. It's like Argentina or Venezuela and her fucking... My grandma's Puerto Rican, her last name is Lee. Like her family last name is Lee. I guess so. How did that happen?

it is yeah it is like you know no I know I know I know um she's tiny no you know brown people in their last name's white and it's funny yeah yeah oh even like your last name is pilot yeah but you're a black your names would be like umfuku or something like that umbagoe or something like that as i've gotten older I did I never I never cared about that but then I got older and for some reason, like say my friend, uh, uh, his actually his first name was Jameson. And he changed his name to Kwamey. He got very radicalized. And I was like, and I was like, whatever, bro. You know, pipeline. That's it. I'm, I'm, I'm, I've been close to that for years. I talk to my mom. I just have my fucking friends like this guy that I'm like, holy shit, like, yeah, I can't go full on

crazy because like, I know, I know good, I know decent white people. I can't become like a American team person. It starts with like, the first thing is the, the, the, point of no return is changing your name to like an advocate as fuck. Yeah. And I talked to my mom about that. And the weird thing was, I thought she was going to full-fledged push back and be like, you're being stupid, shut up.

Because I was like, how would you feel if I did something crazy like that? And she was like, uh-uh. And I was thinking, I was like, mom, it's a great response. Are you like way more radical than you're,

is she hiding her power level to where she's just like waiting for an excuse to become Mchoku or something? That's crazy. Mchuku is crazy. Because I'm like, wait, I thought you would be like, how dare you? That's your name. Your father gave me that name. And she was like, I don't know.

Man, she doesn't care. Who cares? Who cares really? I mean, names mean so little at the same time while meaning so much. It's like one of those weird things where it's like, your name means literally nothing. And someone blows your brains out. Your name means nothing, you know? Like, it doesn't persist or stuff like that.

There's shit like that. It's like really, it's really nihilistic, like, depressing. And I don't mean it to be so hyperbolic. But like, being called up about your name in either direction. It's kind of just dumb. Well, no one's name is unique. So it's just kind of like, what's- My cousin's name is unique.

I bet it isn't. I bet it isn't. No, literally. What's his name? Unique. Oh. I saw my brain because I rolled my eyes so hard. My cousin's name is, I kid, I kid you not.

It's unique. It's dream, unique. And unique. Last name. I'm not going to say last thing. We'll be able to find him directly. New York? Oh, yeah, yeah.

Dream from New York. Dream New York is not a specific enough name. I know another person. I know two people named Dream. One other than him is one other person. See, I'm okay with the name dream. It doesn't bother me. That's a dumb fucking name.

Look, it is, but it doesn't bother. There's a lot of dumb names. Shorten it to Dre. Yeah, I mean, actually, yeah. That's exactly what. Drey AM's my name. You have to do that.

Drey and the A. Drey. A.m. Is my name. Well, that would be their stupid fucking rapper name or something, right? That would be like a. I hope he doesn't rap. He doesn't.

He's from New York. Dream AM is actually, I think I might give Dream AM a listen at least. That's not bad. Dreham, it's not horrible. It's not the worst I've ever heard for sure. He's like a skater black kid, which obviously makes, well, no, he's also not a kid anymore. He's like a grown man taking a guy. He's like 24. Oh.

It's weird to think that, like, could I change my name to something like that? A dream? No, could I be like, like, umbingnaway to Chung Duay? You're definitely part African. Damn, that's hot. Puerto Rican. I like that. Very likely you are.

West African. But like, not enough. it to matter, you know? Like, I don't know if you want to you can. I don't care, but, like, I don't give a fuck. But, like, you got to be aware of the conversation is going to start. Me knowing that you're not, like, a seething racist, it wouldn't really bother me. Right.

You know? Like, on Twitter, a lot of you would be confused. I mean, like, what the fuck? That's just a joke for you. So I understand, like, that's funny. It's a joke. But, like, there's better jokes. There are better jokes.

That's a, that's a hard. That's a very thorough joke. To go through the whole process of change your. fucking name. You're like, oh, that was fun. Let me pull out the other form again. I can't go back to Chris. Well, dude, speaking of fun names.

What? We got a, dude, I, I love, I love this story so far about this CEO killer. His name turns, turns out his name is fucking, what is it?

Luigi Mangione. It doesn't sound real. It's too Italian. It literally sounds like the names that we would make up for that stupid mob. thing you were doing? Like, oh, that's Luigi Mangione, the fucking, I don't know, the scout. This guy, he's like, he sounds like, he's a mob boss and at the same time, a really good

baseball player. Like, there's like something like going on with this guy that, like, Italians aren't really good baseballers anymore. That was the 20s, bro. I know it's, the Japanese are taken over. I know. I know it was, it was the, it was the, it was the, it was the, it was the, it was the, and then the black people came in and they were like, fuck the Italians kind of got moved out. Right. And then the Dominican skin of Cuban showed up and now they had their way. And now the Japanese are,

The Japanese are doing really well right now. Are they? Yeah. Like even, there's a few of them over in Los Angeles. There was a big one that was in, that was in, Angels.

He was in, he was on the Angels. I feel like I remember. He went to the. He went to the. You remember him. Dekki. And they want a penned?

Hideki Matsui. Yeah, you have no reason to remember that name. Oh, you're from New York. Yeah, yeah. I just know these people's names. He was a demon. He was also really fucking good. I couldn't tell you a single Yankee today.

That's, oh, yeah, of course. Of course. I get that. Today? You want to say that's impossible. I was like, no way. You just by proxy. Yeah, he was eventually.

He was a sock first. Actually didn't know that. Well, the house that Ruth built. That was the name of the Yankee Stadium. No, it's called Yankees. There was a nickname. Sorry, nickname. No one called it the house that Ruth built.

Can you do five? Can you do five All-time Yankees? I mean So you can you can Babe Ruth is one of them Okay, Babe Ruth Hedeky Matsui Yes Derek Jeter

Okay, you're good I don't know two other ones Come on, yes you do Out of Sartrequez is he on this? Yeah, A Rod? One more One more One more

I don't know Balzy McBase I really have no That's so stupid You can name me at least one more. I don't know another one. Actually. Strawberry. Who?

It's a mascot. Yeah, but he did play. Darryl Strawberry is a black man. Black man who was very talented who had a really bad drug problem. Sad situation. Really talented guy had a really bad drag problem. The only reason I really know about

Darrell Strawberry is because of the Simpsons. So they had a softball, the nuclear power plant had a softball tournament. And he was in it for some reason. fucking birds and just hired just all major league baseball players and then there was like homer it was like homer was trying to like be on the team but then he easily got replaced by del strawberry i'm pretty good at baseball right more there was roger clemens uh who else was on there uh it is i'm not

gonna name the whole thing but that's a great episode i yeah i only remember exactly four and that's i don't know anymore i never heard deris robert in my life it's good enough you know it's good enough you don't we don't we're not we're not even in new york name right now yeah i just like I just like the hat. It's a good looking hat. My grandma loves it. It's on everybody who's making, who's saying crazy shit right now. You see, like there's, um, you see, I don't, so I actually have been following that,

that weird case with the, uh, the guy who choked out the, um, the homeless. Oh, the fucking Marine or whatever. Yeah, yeah. But the guy, what is that about? I didn't hear about that. Yeah. I somehow, this is an older case where it became another fucking culture war, uh, issue where it clearly shouldn't have been.

There was just this handsome Marine. This is, this is, this is why. the divide happened. Handsome White Marine chokes out this mentally ill Michael Jackson impersonator who's black dude on one of the subways or whatever. He was saying some hostile stuff, but he clearly was, he was kind of being hostile begging for like money or food. And then this guy chokes him out for six fucking minutes. Oh, that's outrageous. That's outrageous. And he got off. First thing, like, he got off. And the idea that you, him knowing, he knows CQC. Yeah, you know, he's a Marine.

He's a Marine. One of his instructors or somebody testified saying, like, yeah, he should have known better to not choke him out for six minutes because choking out somebody for a minute is death, right? You blood choke somebody. They pass out within seconds. If you choke him out for minutes, of course they're fucking dead. But he still got off and mostly because he's a Marine.

The gentleman died, right? Of course he's dead. Of course he's dead as shit. You can't survive being affixated for that long. It's insane. Because he just, why? So he got off and it became. one of those things where it's like, the problem is he's a Marine and he's too handsome. That's

the biggest problem. If you look at his, if you look at him, I was like, that's a good looking guy. The sympathy now dirty, poor, black, crazy. And then all of a sudden, you, you, you, the writing was on the wall. Yeah. We all know if the, if it was reversed, if some filthy fucking, let's just say, if George Floyd choked out somebody. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Some beautiful white guy. It would have been very different story. Very different. Yeah, yeah. But his, uh, I think there was Somebody from his family or whatever that was like, is wearing a yaggy hat going like, Hey, yo, kill people. It's like, or some crazy shit.

I'm not even joking. I think they're just like, yo, what the fuck? Kill people. What murder. I've been seen that so much. What murders? What murder? Do you know Vinnie Paz?

Yeah, of course. He fucking posted that on his story too. What murder? They were talking about Luigi. What murder? He's full of people. That sound was tailor made for this situation. Was it not?

That was insane. That was not only is it... He was like... Record me. Recorded me now. I'm seeing the future. It's so... It's so New York coded

and that it's so specific. Shout out to the Italian. He was the greatest guy around. What about the people he murdered? What? Marta. It sounds so fake. Speaking like that, it's like...

Shout out to the Italians coming back to relevance, bro. Y'all been on a sleep in a downhill for a little while. You know, not much. Has it happened for them. Yeah. They've been getting shot on relentlessly for people who are starting to realize this isn't real.

These people are like, they're all kind of like playing a role. And it started to bleed into other, you know, at a guy that from a Sicily that went to our school. You're jamming your favorite song. And while you aren't missing a beat, you could be missing a signal from your body. It's an SOS from your kidneys. And it doesn't sound like music at all. It's silent. High blood pressure, type 2 diabetes and other.

risk factors can quietly stress the kidneys leading to negative impacts on the heart. That's what you should ask your doctor about a simple urine test called UACR. Most missed the signal for hidden kidney disease and related heart risk. You shouldn't. Visit detect thesos.com today to learn more. And I was like, all right, man, then you got to chill out a little bit because he was so, yeah, and then he had so much gold. And I was like, hey, man, you live in California.

This is not, this is not, maybe, maybe. Maybe you can fit in in Glendale a little bit because they were kind of doing some like mafioso shit. They're homogenous sort of. They sort of, Armenians design their American heritage probably off of Italian people. It seems like it. This is like, it seems like it. This is what Europeans in America act like.

You know, that's what Europeans in America act. Like, if you're like a European person in race to America, you wear a lot of gold, you wear like a lot of, you know, very gaudy-esque things. Yeah.

No respect to any of my Armenian friends. all zero of them. But all zero of them. All genuinely three of them. But like it's that's how they act you know because growing up around

Italians from New York the ones that I was cool with they were either that kind of like you know forget about like but that wasn't them that was like their uncles their uncles and shit. It wasn't for some reason

it was an uncle. The younger people acted like niggas. They were just like oh we're just essentially niggas. They'd speak and act exactly like the way I did when I lived there, you know? But they were just like, yeah, that shit sounds obnoxious. That shit is like, like, why do they?

It's like when you're Hispanic and you talk to her, Jamaican or Caribbean or Caribbean, people are talking to their parents. Like, every time I talk to my dad, I'm like, dad, stop talking like that. You sound stupid. That, he's like, why, why I, why I'm me, huh? But I don't talk, no weirdo. It's like, dude, stop. You sound fucking.

Stop doing that. You sound like Sebastian. Bro. I, uh, oh my God. It's insane. I witnessed that with Kamar Uzman when he was champion. And then he started talking to his dad. Because Kumar Uzman sounds like this.

Hey, I'm Kamar Uzman. What's up? You know, I'm Kamar Uzman. And then he was talking to his dad, Hello, no. A papa. I am, they're Nigerian. And I was like, hello, papa.

And I was like, I was like, I was like, what? Homer says it. I was like, what's happening? It was so like, it was such a switch to I need to talk this way to my father so he completely understands what I'm saying but I didn't know I thought that was like disrespectful

You're just American You're American that's why so you don't have Because your parents speak exactly It's just your code switch It's a code switch in a way that I thought You thought was disrespectful and fake But then I saw it like happen It was like oh my God

This is like a real thing And that was the first time I saw that like genuinely That's kind of wild It's how it is when you have a family that's not from the same places, you know? Right. Because that's how I speak to my dad. I speak to my dad in Patois

because of the fact that that's how he speaks, you know, that was like in the house conversation with him. Yeah. Opposed to like outside, I talk like this, you know? Yeah, you're talking. Yeah. Same thing with like Lillian, like, you guys have spoken to Lillian.

She sounds like a fucking white woman essentially, you know? But like when she's in house who speaks to her mom, she sounds very Hispanic. It's very fascinating. It's very weird, yeah. That's just how it works. Because especially if your parents speak a different language to, that is what happens.

You know, every, every foreign, every reason with foreign, like, heritage does that. Same thing with like your, I'm sure like, um, when your mom was speaking to her mom, she didn't talk same way she spoke to you. I guess she would sound, she would sound way more Spanish. I,

well, she would speak Spanish. Well, to her. Well, exactly. She wouldn't speak it. The way I speak it. The way I see Spanish, I sound like a fucking noose prompter. Polo. Polo. Holla. Holla. Holla. Como estes. Como a states. That's fucking. Dude, that should be, you should be

beaten savagely. Anyone ever said it like that? It says everyone converts. Come on a state shot. Immediately. Immediately. I remember the last episode, I was trying to say I don't know any music in Spanish. And instead of saying like, instead of saying, you know, instead of saying, you know musica despan, I said, yo no music in Spanish.

And I was like, that's so dumb. You don't music in Spanish? Huh? So you said, I don't music in Spanish. It's Spanish. I said it the wrong way trying to say it the right way. by saying it in Spanish. What's how most people say the wrong thing, I would imagine?

You have to... Nobody's trying to say the wrong thing on purpose. You're right. That's insane. Right. It's a really specific thing to say. Whatever, man. Anyway, so this guy shot some guy.

Yeah. Talk about how fucking handsome this guy is, too. Not a bad looking guy. He's a good-looking dude. The fuck, like... It was even... Okay, we saw the CCTV of his face. I'm like, that's a handsome guy.

And then they showed pictures of him this nigga hiking. Yeah, yeah. And he's fucking... Jacked. He's cut up. He at least, he at least was jacked at some point. That photo looks fake also. It's really, very weird. Because, like, he's toned here, but nowhere else. It's very weird. He's like, he's specifically, like, focused on a specific area or genetically, he's just built weird in that way. He has a strong core. Like, really strong core. But it's like he has a strong core, but then he worked nothing else out. It's like, it's so weird. He looked good in other places, but it just looked way too good. It's like, it looked like, it looked like that. a torso of a professional bodybuilder and then the other parts were very lackluster. It just be freak genetics where he's only gifted in his

fucking abs and it's like That's why he took it on. He was like they'll try to shoot me in the gut if they catch me But they'll never be able to penetrate my abs. Yeah, it's clear that he was for a while. He was he was roided out for a while very clearly. I don't think he was just

probably like he was way too big for that is not a normal size human. That's not Really? He's 26, right? As big as he was. Yeah, it's just the amount of knowledge I have in the industry in seeing what is natural and capable versus what is not,

especially the one thing that people always forget is sustainability. When you see people looking that jacked in just a setting like that, and it's not polished, they're shrunken themselves, they dehydrated themselves. Like, you know how people will take photos, professional photos, to look as jacked as possible? Like, there's this guy used to work out with named Tim, were in his professional setting

he looked like a Greek god but when he saw him in person he doesn't look like that because there's more water on him he's a regular when you see someone that jacked in a normal setting it's fucking steroids I need it you need it

I don't know I don't have the same eyes as you but I've seen people who are like just art just insanely good shape and I see people who are like you know like just obviously like I've seen some roided out niggas that look like oh you look disgusting like there's levels to it obviously but I didn't think he look, I think he just like, oh, he has like a really strong core, clearly.

Because he was a climber. I was like, oh, I'd imagine you have like a strong course with that. But he also has his injury, probably, probably cycles all the way back into why he did that. Like, literally, he probably got injured. He couldn't live the lifestyle he was living more anymore. Yeah. And he was like, I'm going to catch you slipping, you know? Yeah.

The idea is there's a lot of people that can look really good naturally, but sustaining it is a different thing. That is true. Especially in a natural setting where you're not specifically trying to capture the best lighting of yourself and you're flexing like you know like people are doing to look as jack as possible he was in a very casual like it was almost like kind of from the side too i was like i was a very natural photo where it wasn't just like he's posing or something and i was like he's so ripped in that like the the abs are protruding so much that that is uh help and another thing he the people that he follows like he follows joe rogan who you know

their old juice head uh this fucking terrible rapper named zubi which I thought I was like, is this a joke? Is he following him for the memes? But I was like, Zubi's not even, you wouldn't even follow him for them, like, because he's not producing anything embarrassing enough. Is he that bad? He's just, he's a bad rapper and he's really stupid. Oh.

It's one of those things where he. It's unfortunate double combo. Yeah. He got, let's put it this way. Actually, he is that bad at rapping. Let's put it this way because I was telling Jojo this. He's worse than Tom McDonald. Dang.

That's crazy. That is crazy. Tom McDonald. I believe that too. At least, if he wasn't. like doing all this woke stuff he would just be like a bad midwestern like clown rapper to me you know what i mean he'd be like one of those guys he'd be like friends with uh insane twisted or whatever the fuck he'd be like like exactly a passing grade yeah yeah i'm like he's fine for that stuff like i think most of that stuff is

like it on the but it's fine for people that listen to it they're like that rats right yeah but come on you know it is oh it's horrible yeah it's horrible but for for them the fago dream thinking fucking meth heads. They love it. What makes it so insane is that M will always be attached to them because of the fact he is unfortunately a Midwest white rapper. Yeah. And he's always going to be attached to those motherfuckers.

And he's like, I'm so good though. And they did beef before I even knew who the fuck they were. They beefed Eminem and it was like, guys. I didn't even know who they were back in the day. I sit down. Come on. Especially that era of him too.

Like beefing with Eminem now was like he's going to say something like wordplay. You could be like, ah, this motherfucker is old and he's dumb. It's like that. But that era, 2000s M&M, you don't do that to yourself. Really dumb. He's going to make a song. You saw him you did the Jarl Rul. He put Jarl Ruhul on his lap and fucked him.

And fucked him hard to the point Jarlowell's career died. Jarl's one of the biggest artists at that time in Eminem killed his career. That is insane. You got to be careful. That really was insane. He killed him. Look, the one thing that's still dead. He is still dead.

He is still dead. He literally never recovered. Because then he had his daughter on the track And I'm asking like, am I bigger than draw rule? He was like, nah, you're the same size. I remember, I remember hearing that. This is so mean-species for no reason. I mean, John Rule is an idiot.

Like, he was fake and you don't stay. It's like the grifter, right? Stay in your lane. Exactly. You know, like don't fly too close to the sun. Don't try to act like that that's what that Andy Pants fuck did. Where he was like trying to, I'm going to start beefing with the act man and all this shit. I'm like, bro, just grift and make your money.

Like, stop trying to put yourself out there as if you're somebody real. And then you respond to them. It's like you have all the cannon father in the fucking world to destroy them. The problem with beef in that context is that it always comes across. You cannot be an anonymous person beefing with somebody who is not anonymous. It just doesn't, like it just comes across as inherently lame. Right. That's true.

Oh, here's Andy Pants Gaming where you can't see his face versus the, act man and you did that's him it's like there's there's you can't him and it's barely there's barely a character in him like imagine he know him too it's like that's him right but yeah right but like also just like imagine m&m versus jaw rule but but m&m never showed his face and he was like he never went on tour he was just like hiding yeah and he was just like it's a lot of everything yeah that's true like you trade a lot for your anonymity my thing is that like people have to understand you don't have like in a rap well particularly now now especially that and very much so done by Kanye, people don't want to give them credit for that.

You don't have to be a thug to be a hip hop artist anymore. Kanye very much so broke that mold of like you don't have to be like a thuggish rapper. Yeah, it was Kanye. Fuck. He was probably the biggest that made people be like, oh yeah, like. Because even M was a thug. Like Eminem wasn't like, he wasn't a gang member that he was out there and he was running with people that. He was doing shit, you know, unfortunately.

He was wrong with people. I mean, the D12 niggas were insane. You know, they were definitely doing it. They shouldn't be doing. And he was just friends with that But he was like, These like my homies You know

There's CCTV footage of him In the 90s Kicking a dog Into a plane propeller You line me up And a plane propeller is crazy too In the air An old plane

It's like a fucking Indiana Jones plane That's like a Sessna or whatever Just I don't know So like people like Now when people beef with you It's like

I don't care dude Like you can just do the whole like I don't care about the beef man Like whatever Yeah, whatever. People are like, oh, I have to go back. It's the rap thing, but it's like, you don't really have to. Like, people have tried to be for logic.

Logic's like, I don't care, man. Have a good one. Yeah. I'm going to go play Mario Kart. Have a, have a blessed time. Well, some beefs. I mean, this guy clearly had a bit of a beef. He had a big beef.

And this was a one, it was a, he got his get back. It was a mass occurring, like the, the CEO, Brian Thompson, I think it was or whatever. Didn't even, yeah, didn't even. Yeah, I really, I don't even. It's actually not even. I'm going to be, I'm going to be completely honest because I'll, I was seeing a lot of people trying to at least do the caveat of, I hate when people do this because it's kind of also number one,

everybody already, you don't need to say this, but when people say, well, I feel bad for the kids or weird. I'm like, yeah, obvious.

It doesn't need to be fucking stated. But however, I was like, let me, let me even challenge that a little bit. The odds are those kids are going to just carry the, they're basically going to carry the legacy of the father. Oh, chip on the shoulder.

And they're going to become terrible fucking people in their own rights and become heads of companies to do terrible things. So it's not like it's in the way it's like the odds are. Every once in a while you have the what do you call it? You have the odd one out or the outlier that someone like say Elon Musk's kids is like you're a piece of shit. I don't want a thing to do with you. But I'm sure some of them, there's probably actually a lot of them because he just doesn't want anything to do with them really. But say a few of his kids have openly been like you suck. That's mainly because he.

probably since he's a terrible father and he's not doing anything. I was thinking like Rupert Murdoch, right? He's going to die pretty soon. And people like his, one of his sons who's like a piece of shit, he's going to be the next in line. There's one of his other sons that's actually voted for Biden and stuff like that. But they're still kind of close. You know what I mean? But it's like these people are all groomed and they're all on average, like very wealthy.

They don't actually care about people on average. There's just that one outlier, that one dude. Very rarely do people grow up in a system of like people being shitty and they grow up it be different, you know? Yeah, because there has to be some sort of like external force that like helps them like, oh, this is different. Yeah. It's like a different situation.

It's like all the, like, yeah, it's like when, when Elliot met E.T. You know? Explain? Huh? You remember, you remember E.T.? The movie. How Elliot was like a gang member. I do remember.

I remember the movie. E.T. was, is that not what E.T. is. What did you call him? Ethan Thomas? Ethan Thomas, the extraterrestrial. Is that not his name? I think it is. It's Ernest Ternist.

It's not Ethan Thomas. Oh, yeah, Ernest Ernest, I forgot. It's Ernest Ternis was his name. My bad. I forgot it. Actually, you're right. I'm so sorry for saying that. I'm so sorry.

What am I thinking? Ernest Ternus. He's an alien. Obviously, it's not Ethan Thomas. That's a human fucking name, dude. Dude. Yeah, in that movie, like Elliot's a gang member, and then he meets E. And then he changes his ways.

Right. Yeah, I remember that. When he gives him the racist pieces that he gets it. him from a kid's body he just killed. It's actually fentanyl. A little fentanyl tablets. You know, it's crazy. If aliens came to Earth, I would give them fentanyl.

I would give them shit like that. What if it powers them up, though? What if their chemistry reacts? What if it's like the limitless? It's like limitless. It's like the limitless. Yeah, I was thinking the limitless pill from that movie. Limitless.

Oh my God. Even I didn't see it. I saw it. For some reason, I saw that movie. Movie was dumb as shit. But it was also entertaining. It was entertaining. And then I was like one of Bradley Cooper's like first movies outside of The Hangover.

It was right after Hangover. Yeah. Like, let's give you an action movie. Yeah. And he was like, all right, I guess this is what you do. That's bad because that usually kills people's careers. Like, uh, he's such a solid actor. Who's that he's a good actor.

So who was that fucking guy, the, the Ab's kid from, from, from, the vampire movies? Telling. Yeah. It's funny how you knew that immediately. I, I said Ab's kid. I am quite. unfortunately I'm quite a Swat Twilight fan. Ironically,

ironically, but ironically is still a fan of it. How are you, okay, okay, hold on a second. So my biggest problem with the Twilight

is, I can go on for years. It's not even, so it's not even just the, it's just the premises of how they changed and not even in a cool way, the way they changed

vampires and likings in a way that it's so gay. Yeah. But like that's because like, I don't, no, never mind the right, I can watch some slocky bullshit.

It's a story. created by a young Mormon girl who was afraid to really identify her weird sexuality so instead of her being like oh these things like I'm attracted to clearly older men in a strange way

and I'm obviously a bit of a furry she's like I'm going to make werewolves and vampires and they're all hot and they love me and then I'm going to have like a weird pro-life moment in there as well too and it's like this it is what it is

It is what it is. I think it's funny. Or words are freaks, bro. I can't even fault that, really. Yeah, I get it. It's like, most people just like, this is what I'm into and I'm going to jerk off and die.

Yeah. She was just like, she was just like, I'm going to make this make me money. I'm going to turn this into a fucking franchise. Stephanie Myers, bro. She's, she's immortalized now.

She's like one of the highest selling book series of all time. It's, it's, that's cool, that's cool, but that also accepts me. Yeah, I mean,

I mean, I guess, does he wrote that Bible? Does the King James of State Nothing for that. Nothing. I don't know. That's crazy.

That's crazy thing about King James' family, the James being around still. That's insane. That's insane. Is the Bible, the Bible's public domain? I imagine so. I don't even want to begin to think about that. It must be. You know what I mean?

Because the public domain, I'm fucking editing a bomb. I'm making one. We're an extra. We're making the Bible. You can absolutely make your own Bible, I think. I think you can. And I think you can call it the Bible. Yeah.

I don't know if you can. I think you can. I think they have different names. Trump printed a Bible with the fucking constitution. That is very true. Yeah, but I'm pretty sure with the same words of the Bible. So it must be public domain then if you can just do that. Right.

So we're going to the snark tank Bible, but it's literally just a tank Bible. It's just a tank on it, but it's the Bible. Yeah. We'll figure it out. Oh, and then the picture of this, of course. Yeah. Yeah, one picture of this. That's the devil in it.

That's, yeah. It'll be that but in stained glass. art, that's, yo. That'd be sick. That's not sick, but like I get it. Well, I mean, literally, it'll be sickening to say it. I'm going to reach out, uh, stained glass artists. People who are like really good at that.

Yeah. Oh, man. Everybody who's good at stained glass who's watching the show. Get us up. Hit us up on Twitter. So people are begging for the wanted sween merch. No. They're begging for it.

And then they're also, then you're going to get your counter. The stained glass saint sweene. Saint Sweeney. Well, they're saying one is. We'll do the same one as you, normal. This would be me. Yeah, let's be you, like smiling, like a cherub. St. Sweeney doing your thing or whatever.

Oh, doing my bottom. Yeah, yeah, doing your shit. And then, we got, we're insane. Like a cloak. Bro, we got you. Like grills on? With grills. That is so disgustingly disrespectful.

I feel like, we got you. I'm not Christian at all. I think that's so disrespectful. I feel like it. We got you. We got you. We hook you up. It must be.

public domain. Because I don't even know who you would Who would you contact? Who do you ask? Right. Yeah, the light, who has the licensing rights to the bond? I'm sure it's like the penguin,

right? The peng. You know, no. Oswald Kabul pie. I don't. Oh my God. I meant the publishing house.

I understood that immediately after I heard. The first thing to give to my mind is fucking Colin Farrell. You're like, Colin Farrow owns the Bible. Only as the penguin. Only as the penguin. He only has the rights if he's in character. I'm falling asleep.

Stop. He only has the rights if he's in character as Oswald Cobble Pie. So the Bible is not entirely public domain. As some versions are, the King James Bible is not public domain. But the Bible is. Some versions of it are.

Well, so let's just do that. Let's do the, the, what is it? The Jing Kame's Bible. Yeah. It'd be the King James again, because that's me. The Jing Kames Bible.

Just do to King James again. That's my name, literally. King's Stun Bible. Yeah, the King Stun Bible. You can just say King James. I am. But it is a different. My name is a different.

James. I get, well, that is very true. That is true, I guess. And we just write really small. So it's like, It's son, Stun, King.

Stun. James. Son. It's like the OJ book. Oh, yeah. If. If. Yeah.

Kingston's what if Bible. If. I did it. That was great. It's really smart. Yeah. He's smart on their behalf. He played the meme too much.

Anyway. Yeah. Shout out to, shout out to OJ. Shout out to Mario and Luigi. Yeah. You know? What?

Crazy name. No one saw it coming. I really, I really, my first guess in these situations is always Dylan. Dillins are just known school shooters. I don't know what it is. Dillins are bad.

Yeah. Something, anything, Even like what did I say? Ethan, what did I say? Ethan Thomas? Like that would have, it would have been like, I would have believed in Ethan.

Ethan Winters. Ethan Thomas would have been like, oh, yeah, he did it. For sure. Yeah. We have to understand this though. We've never had this breed of one, you know? Nothing close to us. We've never, we've never had one.

He feels like a man out of time, really. Did you see? Luigi's not a 26 year old's name. By the way, hilarious age. Hilarious age. No, no, specifically because that's the age you get kicked off of your health insurance, your parents's health insurance. Clearly.

That is so. Clearly something happened. Oh, so did he got his injury. Have you heard something like like there has to like this all, all of these pieces like clearly there's a thing here. Why, you know? I heard a few things. So there was, I think probably back issues and having that was probably a thing. I've heard some stuff that was going on with his with his grandparents.

I don't know if that was verified. Yeah. Well, one of the things was I think their family's company. If I don't know if this is true, but this is what I heard that his family's company was. wrapped up in like, say, like nursing homes or something, something that say United Healthcare were swallowing up businesses, basically their competition, which happened to do with their business. So it was hurting their business by, you know how they are. They're giving offers you can't refuse essentially, the way that they do business. Yeah. And that's what I was hearing.

The unfortunate thing is, oh, oh, so what was that one guy? There's a reporter that says he has his manifesto. Yeah. Yeah. What's his name a clip. Ken Clippenstein? That guy, yeah. It sounds like not a real person. He doesn't sound really. real at all. I, I, I bookmarked it. I haven't read anything yet. Um, if that's the real manifesto, I did read it. You read it? Yeah. What it's say? It's very short. Oh, it's a little, it's like two pages. This fucking Ivy League fucking valedictorian guy, just a short manifesto and all those other assholes have like pages of pages. Well, the thing is that I think that's why. I think that's why it's because that, no, you're right. You're absolutely right. He's like, I don't need to use a bunch

of words to describe my pain. You're one thousand. He's smart. That is, he's to the point. That is very true. You're absolutely right. I didn't really, you don't really glean much out of it. It kind of like there is shit's j yeah I'm luigi let's go he did say like uh you know uh you know they deserve it but like you know whatever

he starts it off by being like first of all uh respect the feds and what they do or whatever and I'm like alright I don't really this guy's kind of politically he's confused yeah when you saw his

who he's following on Twitter that is absolutely true yeah he follows aOC He clearly falls to Rogan. He's probably a very like a moderate young person, you know. That's kind of trying to figure things out like he's like most people are. Probably. But the thing is that he's just-

I feel like at 26 you just kind of know what's going on. Usually more often than not. Which also clearly insane. There's that to be able to actually murder somebody. Yeah, you're a little nice. He's clearly not okay. He's caught to McDonald's too. By the way, do you see that the fucking guy who read the person who ratted him out at the

McDonald's is not going to get their award? Because they didn't put the camera on me. good no 100% absolutely you can't make this shit up you cannot you cannot

I put it right this no but how thematically perfect is that that's beautiful like that is so perfectly thematic it's like hey I did what you asked and they're like

denied actually yeah but you do qualify you did do what we asked but it wasn't through the right exact specific qualification so you're not going to

get your life changing money sorry thanks for Killing Nick's or bringing it. Complete perfect. You couldn't write this any better. Except for if this was,

I would be very upset because I would feel like him getting caught at a McDonald's. How contrived. Like that's how I'd feel. This was like a story. Yeah, yeah. Because this guy, let's be real.

How could you be this calculated to the way that he used the silence or the way that he did all the stuff that he did? He clearly didn't care about getting caught. It showed people were testing in the field how it would sound. Like in the shots, I saw some videos. And it's like, yeah, I understand how he told.

totally got away with it because it's so muffled in a way that beautifully. But then he went to McDonald's? You know what's crazy to me? Like someone that does this, he doesn't care about getting caught. He doesn't keep, like you did,

you did your, you know, like once you kill the dragon, you sit down and you bleed out and you die. You know, you're like, I did what I need to do, you know? I think he was prepared to die, right?

He probably was prepared to die. He's like, oh, I'm not dead. What's happening? Yeah, he's like, oh, I didn't plan for this. So he's just like running. And then he was like, I don't want to run. Let's get a McRib, you know? Let's go get a fucking big crib.

Yeah, I don't know. It's crazy to think that, like, he genuinely probably wouldn't have been caught at all if he didn't pull his mask down to flirt with that lady. Yes. Once again, a woman ruining everything. A woman ruining everything, but also stereotypical Italian, hey, are you doing? It's so funny. Hey, it was going on.

Because that really was the only thing that really gave him away. Right, because everyone saw that and we're like, oh, that's a good looking dude. What the fuck? We were expecting some fucking monster. I was expecting this thing under the fucking, I was expecting. That's crazy. Yeah, like a white, a white version, a white version of this. A white version of this.

A white version of this. A war-looking ass motherfucker. But did you guys saw that his favorite Pokemon was Brelume and he had it on his fucking thing, right? And then it was his proverb was, uh, what was on, prelum was Pokemon number 28, uh, 286. 286. And then it was a proverbs 28 verse 6 where it's like, what you call it? So it's a prop. His favorite Pokemon was there in a proverb.

So which one came first? Do you think the proverbs or the Pokemon of what he, because obviously he, he, his favorite proverb came from the Pokemon or the Prover. What came first? The proverb of the Pokemon. The classic tale is all this time. I think I think it's probably like he read the proverb and then he was like what

Pokemon is proverb. Wait, do you know what the proverb is? Is it even a good one? Yeah. Because if it's not good, then the Pokemon got first. Better is a poor man who walks in integrity than a rich man who is crooked in his ways. Which is literally like the met like it's this is like me building

a D&D character that's kind of silly but has a decent backstory You know like there's like there's a little character in there You know, they can turn this into something My favorite problem is though is I can't remember what the number is But it says I think I think the line is Copyright King James I think it might be in the beginning

Or the end That's such a dumb joke But like I It's not a joke Copyright King James King James has a copyright for the end That would be sick Before copyright law

Before he died, centuries. Copyright. And they're like, what is that, Sire? What is that? Sire, what is that?

And then that guy executes him. As he pulls a kid's mouth off his dick, I don't know. I don't know, but let's look into it. Yeah, so, uh, Luigi. God, Luigi's such a... Luigi. Luigi.

The only way that you could write this better is if there is, in fact, a Mario out there. That's a whole thing. Like, waiting to strike another one. There is for sure a Mario and, his family and I know like journalists are digging like I desperately need We gotta interview Mario.

Yeah, we need Mario Mangrioni. And then like they're That sounds like a fake name. Mario Mangi totally sounds but like how are you not Mario Manette? There must be a Mario because that makes more sense than Luigi. It does.

So it's like there's definitely a Mario Mangioni Those are both mad Italian names you know like they're both like old world Italian names like They're assassins creed names Like they're just not They're not contemporary, like Vinnie is like, even that's old, but like that's fairly contemporary old. You know what I mean?

Yeah. That's like 60s, 70s. Since you guys are from New York, you know any Luigi's? Yeah. I don't know a single. Well, you knew. No, of course. My barber was named Luigi.

Your bar was named Luigi? But he was 70. When I was like eight. Okay. So he's definitely gone. Not young Louise's. Yeah, but I know who's definitely gone. Yeah.

I mean, he could be. He's cutting the hair of angels. Yeah. He could be hanging on by a thread. I don't think so, man. Still, like, you know, like... That guy was living rough. He's fucking green, but he's still cutting.

You know, he's like barely... Damn, imagine. That motherfucker's doing flips and shit. You think big Dick Van Dyke can break dance? I think... Because no one can break dance better than him. I don't disagree with you. I think that'd be like, you know,

like when you've used a little bit, like last bit of your fuel, you're like, I only have a little bit... He'll pass away breakdancing. You used to do a bacon. He does like a nice backhand string in. Like, wow, that was good. He's like, thank you.

you. If Dick Van Dyke can simply get on the ground and spin once, it's better and more impressive than like a breakdanceer in his prime doing the hardest. I actually agree. You know what I mean? I actually agree with that. Yes. I agree with that.

That actually literally makes sense. Yeah. Because you should not expect that guy to do that at all. Speaking of breakdancy, did you hear that apparently she, uh, what's called the Raygun lady wants to make a musical? Oh yeah. People were tagging me in this because it said Raygun the musical. Canceled.

I can't escape this bitch. I really hate that bitch. Well, she's so, I don't have a great deal of hate you. I don't hate, I can't care enough about an Australian. She's so unimpressive. It's like,

what is this? I hate her because of the fact that she like, that's so disrespectful to your, one your country. One year country to an art form. To me, it's more just taking the slot of somebody who deserved it.

That's all. Well, yeah. It's just, it's just rude. It's like shadow of the earth tree. Yeah, I mean, yeah, but shadow of a tree at least. is good, you know? Yeah, but it's not.

It shouldn't be, it's good, but it's not a game. She's not a breakdance. It shouldn't be there. It shouldn't be there. I think it's a perfect analogy, in fact. I don't think it's perfect analogy.

I think it's perfect analogy. I think it's very close, but at least Shadow is a good creation. I think you're nitpicking. I'm not, I don't think I'm nitpicking at all. I'm not even defending Shadow Urchry. It should not be up there.

This is you. This is impression. This is you picking nits. Because it's like, hey, look it. No one's, No one is pushing back that shadowed the urchery is good. Like that's never been,

that's not even part of the conversation. No, no, I understand, right? This is not a game. What I'm trying, what I'm trying to draw that analogy is like,

yes, they're probably they shouldn't be. You're doing glass half full. No, I'm not. Yes, yes. You are. You are.

You are. You are being like, at least this is good and Raygunn is. Yeah. He's fucking horrible. It's horrible. I get what you're doing, but it's,

you're doing that classic thing where it's like, mm, I'm, you say something and it's, And what you say is dumb gay and stupid. Oh, that's what you do, too. Yeah. I mean, you guys are like really good close red, so it makes sense.

Shut the fuck up. You are close red too. I don't even know you guys. I want it in here. I'm actually, in fact, not during. I'm not tired. I've been lying for a while. My name is a Bronson.

I killed this dude and put his skin on. My name is Brontaine. I genuinely, I genuinely would have guessed Bronson before Luigi. Yeah. Yeah, Bronson would have been dope, though. Bronson's a crazy name because of that guy. Because of fucking the movies, Death,

wait not. Death Wish 4. Death Wish 4. Death Wish. Yeah, does Death Wish, um, oh my God,

what's his name? It's something Bronson? I don't know. Charles, you never, you haven't seen a Tom Hardy movie? The Tom Hardy movie with the guy named Bronson, like an actual criminal?

Oh, you mean the actual, that movie? That nigga's insane. Yeah, so the Tom Hardy Bronson. I know what you're talking about. That movie's wild. That was like a,

like, maybe like a 2011 movie or something. Definitely. Something like that. Post high school for me. It's like maybe between that and 2013. Oh, so maybe it was a little lot later. The movie's crazy. Yeah, you could see him butt-ass naked in that movie.

Yeah. I think he could see his dick too. Dirked off to it twice in one night. It's pretty good. And one night is crazy. I mean, Tom Hardy's got the DSLs too. Like, it's dangerous. It's dangerous for a white boy.

He's old now, though, which makes me sad. He's not. He's so much older. Hollywood actually always does that, though. When you get to see them like in a regular setting, like, holy shit. They're gray and like it's. He is so much. Like, he wasn't young.

in Batman when you think about that he was like about my he was about our age and Batman he was like wasn't he was old than that I have no I don't think he was old in that he must have been like in his 40s for Batman damn that's crazy no because then he would have to be

60 something that was 2000 your discretion of time is fuck your original time is more fuck than you think probably I think anyone knows what do you mean he's like he's not 60 he's probably in his mid 20s now he's a good looking 83 year old that's insane

he was a three years old he's walk around like that is insane that would be Santa Blake. He played Venom. He started Venom when he was... Early 90s. He started playing Venom when he was... 93, 94 years old.

He started playing Venom at 90. Now he's 76. There's no concept of age or time. To be that bad at time perception is crazy. I don't know, man. I thought it was yesterday tomorrow. It's like, what? Maybe what we knew about time is wrong.

Probably. I feel like everything we know about everything is different now. because Luigi Mangione really changed the game. Yeah, but not in a way he should have. It's unfortunate. Well, the second I saw his eyebrows under that, like, over the thing, I was like he's getting caught. He's too.

Those look like the fakeest. Like, I have never seen eyebrows like that on a person. It's, he looks like those fucking glasses, the Groucho Marx glasses. It's insane. There's a reason why, you know, ninjas would do what they did, where they'd cover themselves up so much. They'll cover up a lot more. Like so much.

Because the fact is, like, if you're going to, if I'm going to make a devious move, I'm doing it in a dark of night, completely garbed that I can't be seen. The problem is this dude. There's so much surveillance now, too, which makes it a different case. I would have wore a fat suit. Yeah. I would have been like that one guy that wore an old white. He robbed a bank and he wore an old grandpa fucking prosthetics. And it took a while for them to figure out that that was it real.

And I was like, that's brilliant. It's really smart. Eventually, I think eventually they caught with them. I think you get caught. How does that even? How? You just get caught. I think because I think the criminal's biggest problems is that they always shoot their mouth off of somebody.

They fuck up. Eventually they have, it's usually because all those type of the ones that do crazy things like that, I feel like they're all narcissists. Yeah. And they have to tell you their brilliant plan. They want the credit. Yes. And it's like, bro, shut the fuck up. Don't go back to the scene of the crime.

Like Luigi self-aware that he's a, he's a, he's a handsome. some guy, smiling to this bitch, I'm like, come on. He didn't care. I get, I get that. I know he didn't care, but also, if he didn't care, why would he be veiled at all?

You know what I'm saying? Because, like, most people who don't care, like, there was a guy, there's this video I saw. I get, that's not too long on his up, yeah. But like, it's, there was a guy that bought a used car and it's like, all sales are final, and he's like, hey, this car's fucked up. Let me take it back. And they were like, no.

And then he said, if you don't take it back, I'm going to crash my car into your dealership. Is that that video that we've been seeing online? Bro, and that dude just... That video is cream. He does it? He really does it. He just rams into it.

And he's like, I told you. And then first, for some reason, he takes off his jacket and puts it on the car. When he comes back and grabs it. And then this is how you know that he's also a decent person. He's like, is somebody under the car? Like, money, he's like, hopefully I'll hope I didn't run somebody over. And then he's like, okay, whatever. And then he goes and he's just pacing out there.

And I was like, this guy stood on business, but also he's not like a complete psychopath. If you know what I mean? That's someone that's going through something. Clearly. He kept his word. Yes, he did. You know? Yes, he did.

I think he's just something outrageous and he was like, damn, I said that. I got to follow through. I got to do it. I'm not a fucking liar. Yeah, I'm not a lie. I'm no liar. My dad told me to stand on business and don't talk about it, be about it. And guess what?

It doesn't matter what. You are threatened to sexually assault someone and guess what? You got to stand on business. The phone call sense. Like, just a man. Like, you're not, you're not gay. You have no, you have no rapist mowing your body. But you're like, fuck, I said it.

I did say it. It's like that mean where the guy's like, I said it on call duty and it might not. I don't know, man. I can't lie. Bro, you keep shooting me while I'm spawning. I'm going to rape your ass. Yeah, whatever, bro. Whatever.

And they're like, oh, fuck. You do this to yourself, brother. Why did I say that? Find his ID. He's angry and he said it. Like, he's nowhere. He realized it's halfway through. He's like, oh, man.

He knows, he knows that he has a tendency to spout off, but he cannot allow that to get in the way of him giving his word. Yeah. And he's like, he's like, I'm so sorry, kid. Kid. He's like, what? I'm going to track you down a beat. Shit. Fuck.

I'm going to track you down. What's your name? What's your name? What's your name? Kid, I'm so sorry. What? you live. Where do you live, kid?

I'll find you. I'm so sorry. I gotta find you, man. Make it quick. Like, let's not draw this out because I got to do this. Uh, one, two, three. Wow, that's crazy. That's upstairs.

No, no, he's like, wow, that's crazy. He knocks on the fucking door. And the other people can hear it. They hear everything that happens. That is so. It's sound. Because they hear. hear through both of the headsets.

It's like, I remember there was, I forgot what this movie was what this got, his little kid was like looking at his neighbors, he thought his neighbor was like a fucking demon or something like that.

And a neighbor, he, he's a telescope or some shit. Disturbia? I don't, no, it's way more insane. He's way more insane than that.

He like looks and he sees her and it's like fucking like, lanky fucking like fucking Baba Yaga looking bitch looks up and points at him and runs off. And he's like, oh no, that's scary.

And then, like a second later. he looks down and he sees it running into the building he was in and he's just like what movie oh i forgot the name of the movie i saw the clip on twitter and then he then it doesn't sound like is it old is an old movie it's it's like a it's like a fucking probably a european movie made in the like early 2010 something like that damn i don't know it doesn't sound like despicable me so so she runs into the building and he turns it looks at the door and it's like maybe he's on like the seventh floor.

Yeah. Maybe four seconds later. She bursts in a room. And I'm like, this bitch is getting my, like every moment he's not looking at her. She's moving at like a hundred feet a second, you know. Wait, so is it like, that's insane person. Yeah, I'm aware. But is, um, that's really crazy.

Is it like a weeping angel type situation like from Dr. Who or like they only move if you, if you look away from him? I, the only thing I know about Dr. While he's observing her, she moves at regular speed. The moment he's not observing her, her speed is to the 10th degree increased, I guess. That's fucking. At that point, do you just not do anything? He didn't even lock the door, though, which is crazy.

You should have at least locked the door. He didn't even lock the bedroom door. Yeah, I'm not trying to, I don't know. You're dead at that moment. I don't, what's the point? There's no point of being sad about dying when shit like that's about to happen, you know? I hope I'm self-aware in that moment, like, enough to understand. and so I can at least try to just

you know, bust off one more rope before I die. That's so crazy. You know, like, in 10 seconds. I'll show you, I'll show you. I'll try. I mean, I know. Oh, you found. Yeah.

Oh, I think I know what this is. I think I have seen this. Well, I mean. Turn it a little bit more. Yeah, so it's, it's, I don't know what movie this is. Okay, so this guy's all. Ooh, scary. You guys can't see it.

Yeah, you guys are scared. You're fucked. I don't care. Yeah, fuck y'all niggas. How long is this clip, by the way? Like a minute. Is this like, I mean, I can't tell that's an adult or child. It's a child, right?

Look. Well, audience, how are you doing? Look, since you guys can. That's not that fast. No, but Chris. That's just a person running. Chris. Chris, she was in a building before.

Ah, that's really, I could do that. No, no, you can't. I think I could. Chris, she was in a building. She was in a building. Unless you are jumping down flights of steps consistently. Oh, you slid down. like the fire escape.

Let's have a big slide. You have a big slide. You're not doing that. Most people have a big slide. And then look, look at this part. How are you? How's the audience doing?

How are you guys? They're hanging in. The narration's going well enough to where. She runs in. Like, all right, cool. Completely normal speed. This is normal speed.

This is normal speed, right? All right. He's just kind of chilling. He's not really that concerned. He's in shock. He's like, okay, this is weird.

It's a little. bit in shock, yeah. Uh-huh. Turns around very slowly. So, bitch is at the door. She's taking a little too long. It's actually, wait, she's coming in slowly now? It's really not that crazy.

So she's, oh, wait, she's so, wait. Oh, the door hasn't been open. It's just a camera trick. Okay, now she comes. I feel like that's a reasonable amount of time. And that is, Chris, this has been a minute. That's not that, I mean. Chris, this has been a minute.

It's definitely not a reasonable amount of time. I don't, I, I, I, I, I, you call me like anime brain, but that is not people moving that. You're not getting down a building across a street and up into another building. I feel like in less than a minute. You can't do that, Chris. I bet I could. Chris, I really, I know you're kidding. I'm kind of not kidding.

I, I, I believe I could absolutely do it. Chris, you could not. Okay. Chris, you could not. I believe I can. Chris, I. I like this. I like that self-belief.

I'm happy. You're confident, but it's like, it's like testing like, can I punch a rhino unconscious and one hit? It's like you can't. I think you can't do it and you're projecting. I know I can't do it. I know I can't do it. Even at my most athletic, I could not do that.

Right, right. But I know you can't do that. Because if you could do that, Chris, you'd be in a sport somewhere making millions of dollars. No, but I don't have, but I don't have, I don't have, I don't have, I don't. You would be fucking running circles around that. something that is so not this because you'll be making billion. How do you know this isn't my talent

but I'm not interested in doing it? I'd be like you're so insane. I'm true. I have a friend who's a prodigy of guitar and he just doesn't do anything with it. Jalen, Jalen is a complete athlete. If he wanted to be in, if he didn't get hurt, he could have absolutely

been an athlete if you wanted to. Well, but you said if he didn't get hurt. That's true. He could still probably do a ton of shit though. He fell into a walrus enclosure when we were young. And a walrus just laid on him. It didn't hurt him.

It just kind of laid on this. Enclosure. How did that happen? We were at the Walrus Museum. Museum. Museum, not even a zoo. I'm pretty sure that aquariums, if I'm not mistaken, right? Fire museum. Museum dedicated to Walruses.

Is it Walruses? Or is it Walriss? Or is it Walry? Walrus. It's Walries. Walry. Is that how you would say multiple Marises? You know, like Maris from like. Beauty and the Beast?

I would say Maurice and them. Maris's? I would say the multiple Maurice. Mori. I think Maurice. I think Maurice is like one of those dear, dear kind of situations. Multiple Maurice are Maurice. You would say Maurice, right?

Look at the herd of Maurice. Look at the heart of Maurice. Have you guys ever met a Maurice? No, that is a ancient name. There's more ancient than Louise. Ancient. I've met Moris and Marquises before, too. So, Marquise, there's Brownlee.

I've met a Marquise. My brother is not named that, but I'm sure it was inspired by that name. What's your brother's name? Markief. So it's basically two, it's like Mark and Keith. Yeah. But I'm sure it was. Is his dad Mike Tyson?

His dad's his dad. His dad's, my dad. Is your dad Mike Tyson? Yes. I would be, I would be very, I would be very upset that my dad's never spoken to me once in my life. Like, God. Mike. I just hate the combo names, man. I just don't know. I'm not a fan. Like, I don't, basically it was one of those things where they couldn't agree. So they put it together. And I was like, me as a kid,

when I learned that, I'm like, that is so stupid. No offense, bro. Yeah. It's like, it's like, that name's fucking dumb. No offense. No. But it's like, it's one of those things where I'm like, well, you can either go by Mark or Keith. That's what I would do. Yeah. I just, I don't know, man. People, I think people, they play too much. People get so like, Vindicane, I want to name this person This and that, that they don't understand They're giving that name to another being. Right.

Who has to live with it? You have to understand like, hey, I know your name. I want your name be cool. I do want to name you fucking Goki or Akuma. I do think your name being Tatsumaki Semukyaku is really cool. That's insane.

But this is my son dequeathrious. Dequifreous. But. I bet there is a few La Carpetron. after that bit. Dude, LeCarparton. Hearing them talk about that is,

hearing them talk about that bit is fucking crazy. Because they were like, yo, I brought up like one of the dumb names to him and he was like, this is insane. He spent like two hours looking through a bunch of names.

And then he came back and dropped the script on my table and was like, dude, he just went through all the names and I'm like, these guy, that show was insane.

I wish I could remember the name that inspired it because there was like a specific name. It was like a name that I heard before too and I was like, this is a dumb name. Yeah.

I know there's a name. the myth, there's an urban legend, but then the urban legend turned real. So there is, you would always hear in every school that there was a, um, there were named this, so their name orange jello and lemon jello. But the way you pronounce it is Orangelo and LaMondolo. Orangelo and LaMondola. Yeah. So that, but you would hear it in like every fucking school, but then that shit got so popular, some people started actually naming their kids that. And I was like, no, it's good. My aunt told me about that shit. And you just, but you just, but I was, like I actually have literally two kids of this.

And I was like, and people think it's not real because they've heard this bullshit before. But like, no, some dumb-ass parent thought like, oh, these are actually really good names. LaMangelo. And I was like, I can't believe that. I can't believe someone did it. But, hey, it's the same thing where that one girl went viral, Sharkeeshah. Sharkeesh, don't hit her. I remember La Dasha.

Ladesh is one that, I've heard about that. It's shithead. It's a sheep. I should be. talk like that that video is shithead is a crazy day what is the penis island you told me again Penn Island that's like that

maybe someone pen island yeah shithead it's shit head it's dude shit that's an old pole because I remember you remember the video I'm there was like a viral like and maybe like 08 or something I was like I'm Shathed and it was just like

this crazy it was it kind of was like the shoes you remember shoes I got shoes I got shoes yeah it was like that it was like some guy crossdressing and it's like I'm shit and I talk like this. Sheed.

I don't remember. That sounds just like an Arab name to me. Shathed. Yeah. Until you spell it out, it sounds normal. It sounds like normal. Shethed, yeah, right? Shethid sounds like completely normal.

Then you spell it out. You're like, oh. I saw that, I heard that name. I was like, this is too funny. That isn't to be put in a vault. This is too funny. This is too much comedy. Fucking people, man.

You got any names picked out? If you have kids, if you have any demons spawns, you got any names picked out? Nothing crazy. Like Olivia. Julia. Julia? So it sounds like you only want a girl I'd rather a daughter personally

I don't want you have a daughter I mean I probably shouldn't have kids in general I'm not really ready for that yet What about for a male Or a non-binary Non-binary child As a child there's a lot It's a lot going on right

Just name of child If your name's not if you're non-bairn't just like yeah Just pick I don't know pick a color Non-binary like my kid green Is it's a little I'll name my child whatever I think it is and if they don't have a problem with that name later on, I'm fine with you changing it to whatever. Blue Dobidy.

I was thinking, I was thinking Miguel. I like to name Miguel a lot. I like to me a lot personally. I personally like it a lot. Okay. It's because of Spider-Man. Obviously. Yeah.

I like named Miles too. Also Peter as well, but I wouldn't name my kid. You wouldn't name your kid Miles? I don't even, maybe Miles, but not Peter. No, Peter's too boring. Peter. Miguel is too. I just.

I like Michael. I like M names. I like M-Names. It's like Michael. No, Michael's too basic. Marmalade. Marmalade. Marmaduke.

Marmaduke. Marangay. Marangay. I like it. So no African names. Marangelo. No, no African names.

Damn. I'm not. This nigga, he's rather do a Spanish name, Michael. And then he's like, no, no African.

I don't do that. I'm not like, I ain't into that at all. I'm not, like I am African phenotypically, but I'm not, like, you know,

like, you know, I don't know anything about that college. That's rude to me, you know. Shut up. Like, I don't know. It's no point.

Like if I was going to name my kid African name it would be because of like Oh they're a black man I want them know they're black I don't even know that heritage I guess it's not that it's more of just Not even thinking any of them cool Because you're like oh Miguel sounds cool

To me Miguel's like To me I know way too new Miguel's And most of them suck so I don't know any I don't know many African names I'm being honest Hmm What about a

KSI Like you Nick KSI Your kids name's is KSI. KSI. KSI and Degi. Degman. Degman?

I don't think I've ever thought about the name. You've never thought about names before? No. Not really. Because to me, I think it's like, I don't care. Like, I feel like, I'll talk with, like, my partner at that point. Yeah. And then it was just like, I'll pick the one that bothers me the least.

That bothers. Dude, the name, I mean, it's important. If the power is in your name, it's crazy. I think I'm good at, I'm good at, like, shoot. shooting down bad ideas. Okay. You know? And so like...

What about Chris Jr.? No. Terrible. Although I do think, unfortunately, my name goes the best with my last name than any other... What about Christian?

Christian. I hate that name because it's just a thing already. Yeah. You know? So it would have to be something unique then, maybe.

It would have to be a name that is specifically a name and not one of these like... What about Christoph? Like, you just stop. It's Christoph. Christoph's too German. I think Chris

as a name is just too played out. I mean, yeah. Like that is probably like the played out name. So is Miguel and most of the parts of the world. I agree. I agree. Miguel, Michelante. Okay, let's see. How about...

Maldonado's a weird name to go well with something. How about Craven? Craven. I like angel names. Like the yells? What do you mean? Like Samuel, Miguel. Oh, you mean like the...

Michael. Yeah, the... Yeah, the... Latin names. Yeah. Of God. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

I think those names sound good in the tongue. Like I love Raphael. I think Raphael's a really nice name. Italian names are dope, dude. I'll give them with that. That's Luigi. That's more Latin, but yeah. That kid was, I mean, most, you know.

Yeah. I've never. Right down the pipeline into that. I've only met. You're right. You're not meeting a Latin person anymore. You know, they're not around. True.

True. I do know one Raphael, but I would say most of the Raphael, but I would say most of the Raphael's in the world now probably live in. Italy. That's true. Or in the sewers. I knew one rap. He had really bad anger problems just like Raphael from the show.

And I was like, damn, bro. You think it was because of the show? I think him having to be told, Raphael, somebody's like, I'm not mad. And eventually, get burned him. He was like, I am mad. Started carrying size around and just stabbing people. And just yoying way stronger than he needs to be for some reason. I would say, I do like Dom.

As a name. Like short for Dominic? Dominic. Domic is a really good name. I like that. Sure for dominated. I mean, I mean,

could be. I don't like, if they choose to be. I don't like Dom because it reminds me of a bunch of like, I would definitely name my kid after a Gears War actor.

Totally. Yeah, of course. This is Dizzy. Phoenix did. Dizzy? Dizzy and the game is hilarious. Dude,

Phoenix is actually like F-E-N-I-I-X. Is that how it's spelled? Phoenix, yeah. Yeah. Like to me. Is it spelled with the E, not the O? Yeah. Yeah.

It's, it's not Phonix. No, it's not Phionics. No, it's not Phonics. It's not phonics. Yeah, but I actually like that. If you can name, actually, it's funny you say that because I'm convinced that if I have a son, his name's going to be Hendricks. Like I've just, I heard it one day and I was like, I fucking love that name. With an X?

Absolutely. What else was a KS? Ew, no. Isn't the Ban Margera thing? No. First of all, what the fucking, sorry. If you spell like that, that's definitely a last name. Like if you put like CKS, Hendricks, like at.

C. K. Christina Hendricks is that's how her name. Is that how it's spelled? I'm pretty sure, yeah. Actually, I never even looked at. I've never seen her name. My assumption is that because I feel like I would have noticed. It's like,

oh, it's like Jimmy Hendrick. A good name for my face would be Princeton. I think Princeton would be a very good name. Princeton. Yeah. It's a good name. It is. I'm sorry.

It's silly. So you know, Kingston and then Princeton. And then Dukeston. And then Dukeston. And Lordston. Then Knightston. Knightston. All my.

Surfston. And yeah, peasantston. And then. Peasantston. My eighth son, Peasantston. Dad kid is fucked. He just simply wasn't born.

He's like, I had no, I'm Peasantston. And he's got the least amount of genetic code to work with because he was last. He is last. That sucks. He's going to be autistic.

Is he going to be old? You're going to be, you're going to be done. Gay. He's going to be like, I hate my name so much. I'm like, sorry, bro.

Sorry, peasants. Sorry, peasants. Sorry, peasant. Sorry, Peasantston. Pez. He called Pez. Because he's so, because he's so, what do you call it? Dispensable.

Wow. He's like, just like, whatever. Who cares? Wow, that goes, is that how Pez dispenser even came about? Because someone named Peasanton. Or someone named Peasantston and they would like, let. Yes. That's what I said.

That's what I bit. I'm going to name my son, Indiana Jones Maldonado now. Indiana. He's playing through that game now. Man, I've seen a lot of footage of that game, and it's making me want to play it. It pisses me off how good it is. Because I didn't, I don't really care about that. Is it first person? Yeah.

Which at first I thought dumb. I was like, couldn't care less. Just make uncharted. Like, what are you doing? And then you play and you're like, oh, this is actually amazing. Yeah. Like this is, it probably is like, it reminds me of like prey and like dishonored and hitman. And then, do you ever play Butcher Bay? The, um, Chronicles Eridic game? It was all hand-to-hand combat. It's kind of like that too. You're just like, what the fuck?

beating the shit out of Nazis is way satisfying. Like way more satisfying than just shooting them in Wolfenside just like because you could like whip them towards you grab them like this and then deck them in the face and it feels like crazy. The thing is how fast they hands are that seems satisfying and also they use the old sound effect in the from the movie. Yeah, it's the old... That... Which is a great sound effect. Like I can't recreate it but like I love that sound effects. It's like yeah.

It's awesome. There's a little bit of a sub-wolf to it but also that crack to it. It's a great sound. It's super satisfied. I didn't. No, I didn't. I didn't care about it

probably last week. And then I sat and watched all the movies because I was like, I heard that it was good. Oh, you watched the movies. Yeah, I watched all the three of them. Wow.

I didn't think he would do that. All three of them. Yeah. Because I feel like if I'm going to play Indiana Jones game, no, you're not watching the other ones. What the fuck am I going to? There's five of them, isn't it?

Yeah. They are five of them, but I'm not going to watch, though. I don't, first, I don't even necessarily, Doom was the most fun that I had in all those three movies. I just remember that.

Wow. And that was like, and when I tweeted about it, people were in the comments like, that's a crazy, that's the worst one. And I was like, all right. Of like the original three. And like maybe. No. I don't agree really.

I think Temple of Doom is wicked sick. Like the whole part, everything about it is awesome. My brain is like, it's like, I have an inclination. I could be totally wrong. It was like the Simpsons community when people were gaslit into thinking there was no good seasons past eight. Right. Yeah.

Like, that's not fucking true. That is just some of the best moments are not in those seasons. What happens is this, right? What happens is we live in this unique, unique world, right? Where what happened is a person, right? Goals and he makes it, they make a video about something, right? And they're like, oh, they're like, oh, this thing sucks, right? And then what happens is that people agree with that person without even observing it themselves.

Yes, I agree. That's what happened? That Peter Parker beam where he's like, that's a nice opinion. Yeah. Did a YouTuber give it to you? It really doesn't feel that way because I would, look, I watched Raiders of the Lost Ark, and I thought it was like, it's, opening's great, ending's great,

middle's kind of like, that's okay. You have the little Asian boy one? No, no, that's the second one. That's the second one. That's a second one. Mr. Jones. Dr. Jones.

Sorry, Dr. Jones. That's the guy from what you call of him. Stop talking. I can't believe that worked. I can't believe that worked. Jesus, it kept upping and I'm like, everything everywhere all at once. There you go.

I remember. Fucking twat. You stole myself. thinking for me. That was good. That was good. But yeah, fucking,

yeah, that's the kid. That's short round is that guy from that movie. But that, Temple of Doom is crazy. Like, it starts off with, like, this musical number,

and he's poisoned, and, like, he's fighting, like a bunch of people in, like, a banquet hall. They escape on a plane. The plane crashes.

They escape on a fucking raft. And then they're like, the whole movie is so much fun. It's fun. It's so fun. And it's so good. It is, if there's ever any more

Indiana Jones, ever, especially because this game's very Temple of Doom too. Like, more of this. It's sick. It's awesome. Well, he's a relic now. Well, I mean, the game is set.

It's set like right after Raiders. After this, I want more games. Like, it's so good. That seems, I mean, like, it's gotten me interested in, I've seen, I've seen Temple of Dune the most because that one really stuck with me as a kid. Me too. Raiders, there's moments within Raiders. And I feel like, see, I swear I, I, I'm positive.

There's video essays talking about the greatness of Raiders. Oh, yeah. And that is convinced people that, like, Temple of Doom sucks dick. Probably on an artistic standpoint and not just a fun fucking movie. And to me, that's the whole, that is literally the only reason I'm watching Indiana Jones to have fun. Dude, I was sitting, I was sitting watching these movies. And they were, like, basically new again to me because I haven't seen them since, like, the 90s. Right.

You know. And it got to that bridge scene on Temple of Doom where he's like in the middle. And I'm like, and he has the Cimitar. I'm like, cut the bridge. I shouted. Cut the bridge. TV. I never feel that way about movies ever. I was like, this is sick. This is so much fun.

Yeah. But yeah, dude. To me, that's exactly, I'm like, I don't, that's weird hearing that. But I, like I said, I'm sure. It just, I think it's because there's no Nazis in it, which to be fair is the least fun part of that movie is the fact that there are no Nazis. That is a very, really. Yeah, that is a very.

Isn't there like objectively magic in that universe too? Oh, yeah. There's supernatural stuff. It's grounded, supernatural stuff, like it's believable. It's not like Crystal Skull where there's a fucking alien. That's why people were mad at Crystal Skull because it was so much more crazy than like magic. It's the way they did the alien. And also the fact that it's his son.

Look, realistically speaking, I, it's not, I don't care that much about the fact that there's aliens in Indiana Jones because to me it's like, yeah, I don't know, whatever. Do whatever you want. I just, I don't want to see old Indiana Jones. You know what I mean? It doesn't need to be a thing. I don't want to see people that I like. I don't like seeing family age. So why the fuck would I want to see like my favorite fictional characters become old and decrepit?

Like I remember feeling that way about, um, and at the end of Dragon Ball, well, also that. Ooh, that is a very good example. Also that, like, I hate, I hate, I hate, I hate middle your solid. I hate it. I love four for what it is. It's a good game. But I understand like seeing elderly snakes. This nigga has a bad back and I'm like, bro, I need to calm down because he's fucking agitated.

Like, I don't want to have, I don't want to have adventures with this guy. Like, I don't want to do it. You should be relaxing or dead by, long before this. Totally. And so I feel the same way at the end of GT when, like, Pan was all old. Not that I gave a shit about Pan, but like the implications of that being like, oh, man, Pan's old. That means, like, fucking Balma's dead.

All this other shit. It's like, I don't like thinking about this shit. These are fictional characters and they're meant to be, like, kind of like mythic. If you want to build, like, a whole, like, serious narrative, I guess, like, Game of Thrones. Like, okay. I think characters have to eventually kind of leave. I'm fine with that. I think characters have to have an end.

But leaving is not having an adventure with them. Imagine old cap. And then they just actually made a movie with old Captain America. You'd be like. Chris Evans sitting old on that bench, but like the movie is the whole time it's him. And he's fighting as if like that's not a problem. They're like, oh wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.

What's his name, Sam or whoever the Falcon is? They're like, wait, wait, actually, hold on, hold on. They just give the shield right back to Cab. And he's like, oh, I guess. There we go. Bothers me a lot. Here we go again. I can do this all night.

I can do this all five minutes. Before supper. All before the early birth special after? Is it? Yeah. Yeah, it's no, totally. It is him seeing, and he's much older in this latest movie that came out. Would it come on last year's on then?

Yeah, the Dial of Destiny is like 80. I was like, fuck, he's so old. People talk about those like Indiana Jones jumping the. shark or whatever, right? With like the alien and the time travel or whatever in the new movie. It's like, not even really because it's just like whatever. Like go do supernatural stuff. I just don't want to see you old. I don't care to see that. I imagine imagine 50, imagine, 89 year old Peter Parker. Do you want to see that? Do you want to see a movie about that guy? No, I want to see it end up there. Like that that's where it ends. See, I wouldn't mind. It's exactly.

It's a journey. It should end in the way that like say I love the movie. The movie wouldn't be taking place with it. it but that's where the movie ends. It ends on him being old on his property somewhere and his kids coming by and it's like, oh man, I had a good one.

And then that's where it's Finn. Fade the black. Yeah, like, I'm totally about it. Not him being like, let me go stop the green goblin from blowing up another city. I'll say this. I would play if Rocksteady,

God forbid, you know, if they made a Batman Beyond game, I would be totally on board. Yeah. Like say the open. is you being old as Batman, you get fucked, like hard. Like, there's, I, premmas. Or old Batman being a fuck out of a young person being like my back.

But then, like, but also, like, but also, like, but also, old Batman is kind of like, like, you need old Batman for Batman Beyond. Yes. So that's, like, I understand that. That, that for that. But, like, if I had to spin a significant amount of time with Batman being slow and old, yeah, like, no. I would turn that game off.

Yeah. And you can, and to be fair, like, dude, like, and I know they tried, like, you cannot pass off the torch of Indiana Jones. It just doesn't work. You can't do it. He is such a specific type of character where it's just like, that's it. You can't just have Shailabov come in and it's like,

it's me. Yeah. I'm Indiana sons. And I like Shalabuff. I like him. I think he's actually a really talented actor. He's way more. I'm sorry.

No one gave a shit. They killed him. Did you see that? Did you see that? No, what he's on about? So the new movie, so he's dead in the canon of Indiana Jones. And he died in a war or something.

And Indiana Joe's all sad. I'm like, I don't want to see Indiana Joe sad about his dead son. That is so depressing. Especially when the last guy at last crusade ends. I don't want to see like him suffering over his dead son. That's so terrible. They should have put Sean Connery in this dial the destiny as his son. Hello, dad.

Hello, dad. Hello, father. Franchishing, you here, dad. At this point, it would have gotten me to see the movie. Oh, yeah. Like, if it was that insane, if it was that insane, I would age Sean Connery as no older than ageed up, in fact. Even older. He's so.

That's what makes it great. Hello, father. It's like a Fallout 4 situation. This is my old son. There's my old. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. I don't know.

Fuck everybody. Fall of 4 was fun, man. Fuck all you all you. I'm mad fun. Fall 4 was fun. That's another one of those things. That's another one. Fought 4 is fun.

Tumblr Doom is sick. Yeah. In my opinion, it's the best one. I enjoy that one consistently the most. Yeah. I think the first one is great also, but like, dude. It's a better movie, if you know what I mean. Yeah.

It's better throughout the whole runtime of it. Whereas I feel like Raiders is really good in the beginning. Really, the end of Raiders is awesome. Like the Nazis getting their faces melted off and that's doing the car chase. It's awesome. And there's a specific stunt in that movie too where he's like underneath a like one of those army trucks. And he's like being dragged and he's like crawling under it dragging. It's like, this is sick.

but everything before that is kind of like it's okay it's reasonable it's good so something that came up right so uh this is a cut off of this point uh Indiana Jones is cool whatever yeah Harrison for it I I give so few fucks about him always I've never liked Hans Solo or Indiana Jones really I'm just I've just never cared about them you know it's like you're an archaeologist but like there's no dinosaurs

Laura Croft is you but like she has tits I'd rather watch Laura Crosf do everything you do that's my take not that they're bad movies I think the first and second movie are really fun to watch But I'm not like I'm not watching I'm not watching no tits I get it I'm not watching no I'm not objectifying a person in the movie Look I would enjoy it I would enjoy him

Huh? Because I will say just before the new one The old new one Oh really? Oh really? So Crystal Skulls So 2007 Around around then

What's that 2007? No later It was around then It's later than that for sure Maybe 100% because they are making South Park jokes about it and I was in a high school at least.

You might be right. I just, I feel like it was around that time. I was maybe, it was maybe like 09. 09. Oh, nine sounds right. That's,

you're splitting hairs. I think of that. Yeah, but, I mean, yeah, relatively it's right there. Yeah. Crystal skull.

Oh, it's all the fucking. It is the crystal skull. It's just literal crystal skull. No. Who fuck buys the crystal skull? 2008. Yeah.

Yeah. So it's literally just a year off. No, no. We're not, we're not, we're not, we're not, we're not, we're being like, .

It just, you in an ancient tomb and leaving you. Damn. That also went fucking the mummy came back. The mummy came back at that point. Oh yeah, they had the last one for the freezer. They had that dragon one and Jet Lee was the antagonist.

It was so assed. I was so, I didn't. It was still fun because they were just fun movies. It must have been asked because I saw it and I don't remember any of it. Because granted, the first two are insanely good. Those are like, the mummy are,

perfect action adventure movies. The mummy was a great, like, I don't need Indiana Jones like this old. old, like to me, the mummy covered this new discovery adventure shit. I didn't need Indiana anymore. Brendan Fraser was really fun, handsome guy. I know, like, say, Harrison Ford is this old rugged fucking, he's old world handsome. He's the handsome far parents. I get it.

He's what a lot of men aspire to, but they'll never get it. He's a good looking guy in that first movie, I will say. He looks really good. It's frustrating because I'm like, damn. When I saw a side by side of the graphics and then him, I was like, oh man, he's way hot on the video. game. Yeah, it's noticeable. I think he's a good looking guy, but it's, it's time.

It's set times, you know, time piece of like your golden guy of that time, you know, for sure. Anyway, I think Harrison Ford is not bad looking. I think, like a, but if he had tits, he would be, it would be way bad. If female him would be an interesting. No, I mean Harrison Ford would tits. Nah. No?

Nah. Him as a woman. The best of both worlds. Warners how good the pussy is, but like, yeah. Harrison Ford has a pussy. I mean, crazy. I'm fucking. I'm doing D.

Okay. What did you? Yeah. What did you have to say? So the game's great. I recommend it go play it. If you like thief, uh,

prey, hitman, those types of games, it's way, but it's, it's really fucking good. If you love whipping, niggas.

But, uh, there's, um, there's talk about, uh, there's more of rivals news, right?

A lot of people are clamoring for there being a role cue in the game. What is that? Ro queue. Like you, like you, like you, like you cue in a specific role, like strategist or duelist or,

uh, like healer, tank or, or damage dealer or stuff like that. Isn't that just picking your character? Well, no, role cue is like, there's a cue where you enter, like, oh, you're in the beginning. You're like, oh, I'm going to be a healer. Oh.

So this is if you're, like, playing with, like, random teams or something? So you match me and you're like, I want to play a healer, so I'm going to match make for healer. Oh, so you don't have to add the space for healer. So everyone isn't Wolverine on the map or something? Yeah. Okay. I get it. I personally think that the mode should be available.

It should not be mandatory, though. It should not be a mandatory thing. You should not have to go into quick play. Well, that's not what quick plays for. Well, it's not for, no, no. But, like, let's say people want to play, like, a more constructed version of it. Like, I think there should be a Roe Q quick play playlist as well. I guess, yeah.

Was like, oh, this is Roel Q as well, not mandatory. It should not be mandatory because that will kill the game. Yeah. That will kill the game. Sounds like it should be a simple, like, just addition, right? Yes, that's what I would assume to. People disagree with that. Obviously, because people are.

Wait, why would they disagree with adding something that they don't have to participate in? Like, same thing with, like, the, the pause thing for. The pause thing for the soul's games, right? Like, I think back at that, right? I think back at it and I think back at it. Just making my eye twitch. It's just like, I don't know why people push back against you. Like you're saying with the fucking pause thing.

I think back right. You don't have to use it. You don't have to use it as well. Like, I think that you don't have to use those things. I was wrong. And I was wrong about that word. It's that famous like what I don't know if it was like a tweet or a video or a gift or something, but it was like you control the buttons you press.

Yeah. Have you seen that? I haven't seen it, but like that's true. It's like people getting mad. A recent example was like in that India you can get like trophies for like I think you get there's like an achievement for taking pictures of all the like stray cats or whatever

I don't know I don't give a shit you know I can't believe there's fucking in the game It's like just don't do it Like what do you mean These are features in the game that like you could You could partake or don't you know You control the buttons you press I didn't I almost wish I didn't know that

That some people that there were people Complaining about that's probably like It's probably like 20 people But the fact that there's like It's like if we live in this world that literally shouldn't be one person. It's like the pronouns thing at the beginning of Starfields. People are always going to be mad about this.

Literally don't have to use it at all. People don't like everything, man. Everything in a plan somebody doesn't like. You know, every single thing. They'll find a reason to dislik it. And that's the beauty of us being humans. You know, we're allowed to like and dislike whatever we want. I'm told, I love that people like and dislike things.

I loat when people need to voice their opinions about shit like that. That doesn't matter. I'm sorry, bro. There's an open stage on the world, man. And those people should be beaten savagely. I think they should have their, lie. I think every time someone argues about something genuinely stupid and

tries to get a big claim out of it, should have their life shortened, actually. I think it's like BSA. It would be great. I'm like, like a reaper comes and just and is like to you like, oh, you are living six last years. Yeah. But that would be that. It would. Yeah, people are, people are complaining about that. I'm like, uh,

I could see why people would want that. Because the worst experience in team, or not hero shooters is the fact that it's a team base game. Yeah. That is the worst part of those games. It sucks being like, all right, I always have you to person that would be the flex pick, you know? Because I'm that guy often, unfortunately. I'm just like, oh, yeah, I'll play the strategist.

I'll play the healer. I'll play the same. Straight, TGs. You know, but I don't, I don't do shit like that. So, like, it doesn't, it's, but I, just objectively, when I hear a good idea, it's like, yeah, add it. And then the person that's like, I don't like that idea. Cool. Don't play that version of it.

Like, literally the conversation should end there, but somehow it continues. I think competitively, there needs to be a role cube. I think that's a thing that has to happen. Competitively, they need to be. Ideally, ideally, you wouldn't even go in with solo anyway. No, I agree. I agree. Obviously, you're going to have to play solo.

Solo Elo is a different experience. But for, like, competitive, you have to, you have to have a role. I did figure out how to make Spider-Man not asked to play. Oh, he's fun. He's fun to suck, actually. Dude, I can't believe that's a default setting, though. Like, I really can't believe that the default setting for some of these characters is, like, the worst way to play them. I agree.

It's insane. Like, so there's, like, a web swing mechanic in it, and it automatically, what it does is like it just webs the ceiling and then like just like launches you in this awkward direction. It webs the close point to you. But that's an auto swing and if you turn it off you can aim it and actually like zip to the ground and stuff which you can't do without that

and you're just like I guess it's like dummy setting right like you're a dumb stupid idiot and you clearly aren't going to be able to do anything well so let me just lunge you forward I guess. Yeah it literally it's it's um it's night and day so it kind of says what they think

of their play kind of yeah He's like, these are Overwatch people. Spider-Man's a character that's not easy to play. It's like, having that. But, like, if you want control of the character, you know you're going to use. Right. Like, I think that's, even for me, like, jumping with X in general and shooting games is dumb. I never understood it.

I never understood jumping with X because of the fact that the way I hold the controller, especially, too, I don't hold it with the claw anything. So I jump with L3. Everything I jump at L3. So I can aim and jump around. In most things? You're right. You're right. Yeah.

And that interaction is sprint. And another one is Males. Yeah, that's the thing. I guess a bumper. I guess bumper is the thing I jump on the other thing. A bumper jumper, that's all right.

But like, why? So what is, so hitting X, why is that a problem? I don't, I'm, I visually,

I can't, I can't hit X and aim with the analog at the same time. Yeah. I see. I agree with that. I just kind of,

I see what you're saying. I see what you're saying. I do claw grip. I do claw grip. It's probably not great. Understood. I guess I, mostly with that use controls

and things use of a claw grip, though. Yeah, I didn't change my controls so you'll be able to bump or jump. Okay. All right. Fair enough. Because I'm not,

I'm not like competitive in that way. So I'm probably, I, it probably makes sense and it's like maybe I even have a slight disadvantage by that. Like, it's a slight. It's not, it's like a game of milliseconds.

Right. If you're not playing a competitive game, you don't need that shit. It's not going to like really change your experience because I've played plenty of games like that prior. Like right now I'm trying to like very much so get good at playing shooting games on PC. And it sucks because I'm terrible at it. and it makes me feel bad.

But it's not the aim. It's the moving around of using ASWD. I agree. That shit feels so awkward to my brain, dude. The way that I always describe it is to me, like, controller is definitely, it's less precise and all that, right? But to me, I had to turn it around. I can't hear this guy. Fucking Urog-ass character.

But to me, like, the, the distribution of the precision and the non-precision on a controller is equivalent. You know what I mean? Like you have the same amount of control in both areas. Whereas I feel like with a mouse, it's like mega precise, like to an insane degree. And then the, and then you're moving around with a fucking DDR pad, which feels mega imprecise in comparison. So it's just like, it's this awkward like mix of like completely asymmetric like, okay, this is, this feels like I'm God. And then this feels like I'm literally retarded. Like it's insane.

I agree. And so for me, I'd rather, I'd rather just. figure out the evenness of a of a of the joystick it's just weird i understand there's a reason why people use pc on mouse and key for more like uh competitive and like better it's more precise for sure i just i hate because it's click it's like i i can do i just have more control with my hand than my fucking thumb yeah like if i'm aiming with the with the analog the the the ls the threes and the it was like oh your head like yeah like that you just i'm like right i can pinpoint it usually you're fucking yeah yeah

There are definitely games where it's just like You can't play Counterstrike with the controller You know what I mean? Yeah, you're fucked if you do You can try. If you're trying to compete at the level I guess. Yeah, I think even stalker is a game like that too Where it's like there are certain games where it's like, this is PC Yeah

But then there are other games where you play them and it's like No, this can be PC I think Halo is one of those I think Halo infinite particularly I did fucking great with you in controller most of the time Yeah, a lot of the HAL games are like specifically made for that. Call Duty is perfectly fine on controller

Um, Battlefield's perfectly fine on controller A lot of them are. Overwatch for certain characters, very much so. Farrow was like perfect for control. I played Pharaoh almost exclusively because I could just chill on the couch and play it. Just fly with you and shoot rockets at him. Yeah, I would knock people off the stage. It was awesome.

Fucking Jeff the shark eyes, fucking little. Anyway. Should we get on the questions? Yeah. Remember, you can ask questions over at patreon.com slash the Star Tank and you better do it because if you don't, we may end up harming you physically. bang bang bang that's fucking crazy

shit I forgot about that it's real the Luigi the Luigi finger guns in Smash Bros I did not realize that was a thing because Luigi is picked so so completely rarely people that play as Luigi

only play as Luigi and they get verbally abuse for playing as him because Luigi's this lamer he is this lamer Mario he is better though which is always such a funny thing he is better Mario

he's better Mario but he's lame. But he's lame and he's a pussy. Yeah, it's weird. It is kind of weird because he had the better jump. He's a better jump. In the old games, he's taller, he's faster. He's literally better. He's green, so he's invisible in Chroma Key. Yeah. He's a lot of good

qualities. Very good advantage. Yeah. If you're fighting somebody who sees in Chroma key. Yeah, they're like, oh, fuck. Where the fuck is he at? Where's the grass? He's just a fire butt. You, what hit me? All right. Coldstone E.T. wrote in. Nice.

It says, figured I'd ask again, since I joined towards the end of November, but greetings fellas, brand new patron, been listening for forever. I finally decided to join immediately after Chris's newest glasses off about soft language.

Oh, welcome. Nice. That's interesting. See, see, Colton's Old E.T. You are an intelligent person. You know how I know that? Because you saw that video and you were like,

I wonder what else Chris does. And you went into the description and clicked on one of the links that's in there. I can't even tell you how many times people are like, where's the shows? He says he does podcast, but where are they? They're in the description.

Every single description I've ever had. That's where they, so I just, I want to appreciate you. I want to send you your flowers. I appreciate you too. And I want to say, I have to respond to you. Like, where's the show? There's also these things called search engines. If you type Chris Raygun podcast, it will pop up.

It will pop up. I promise you. It will pop up. It is so crazy. I just really want to send you your flowers because this is becoming increasingly rare. I love when people think critically and do shit like that. It's great. I can tell that this guy's older, though.

Just by that level of confidence. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Like, I would guess that you're probably like late 20s earliest. Yeah. But anyway, he says after watching the video, I was scrolling through TikTok recently and stumbled upon these story time videos

where these random people read Storytime Reddit. When they were reading the stories about sex they always say spicy sleep instead. Spicy sleep. Fucking. I know what they're saying, but like

are they trying to be cute or is it like actually a Are they actually nerfing their language. What happens is this. People have nerfed their language because of the fact that people don't get ad and shit like that. We all know that. We all know that like people are trying to say as monetizeable as possible. That is the reason why people do this stuff. People don't, no one wants to say S-A actually. I think they do it to an extent that they don't need to. Probably, yeah, probably, but it's still to secure the bag, you know, unfortunately. Because I'm pretty confident

that the only reason our show gets demonetized is because of the N-words. There's the N-words that also I think more likely if I think the algorithm isn't very different in that aspect since there was people that were like oh they had apocalypse and everything ruin everything dude back in 2015 you didn't even get to challenge your demonization it would just happen and then you were fuck so for example I made a mattress girl video if you remember mattress girl where she was like oh I got like raped in college or whatever and then her story didn't check out so she started carrying her mattress with her all around campus oh yeah I do remember It became like a cultural issue

because we're like Oh, she's one of the liars And then other people Like believe all women And it's like her story isn't check out So it became like a clash of shit But anyway, I talked about it And of course me I'm talking about sexual assault

So I got demonetized And I was thinking Fuck I wonder if I like change the People are saying change the title Do change the thumbnail Yeah And nothing worked It was already marked

It was over So I think it is consistently If that is how you're marked you just have this scarlet letter, right? And you're like this channel is fucked. It doesn't matter if we just put out like the cleanest thing. It's going to get demonetized. You have to review it no matter what.

We've got a couple of episodes recently that were like perfectly monitored. But that's what's so weird. It's no for no reason. It's no different than anything else that we do. There was an episode where I can't remember. We're talking about some fucked up stuff and it got greenlit. I think the fucked up thing was in the thumbnail. And like in the title.

It was like it was like like no holds barred on the title. And then it was like, you're good, here's some money. And then the other one was like, I don't know, Derek goes swimming and then demonetized. Demonitized and then confirmed like you're not getting the best ads rates. Authorities have been arrested. You're fucking, you're come. You're fucked. And it doesn't make any sense, I think, but nine times out of ten, it's always the yellow one on the channel. However, since my main channel, it died.

and then I had a little bit of a renaissance, everything's green now. It makes no fucking sense. Yeah, since I've posted, I haven't had, well, I had one,

but it was a copyright thing. Oh, okay. Which I expected. It was just like, I want to say, it's the nature of how things work now where it's like everyone is just trying to secure their bags,

you know, it's more important than the content they're making. Obviously, people are trying to make a living. So, you know, I understand. People trying to get it.

I get it. It's stupid. It's stupid. It's stupid. but the thing is that very often you can get a point across without using harsh language

but the words that they are need to be said you know if you're talking about someone being sexually abused you have to talk about that yeah my thing is but you have to also understand because it's like you know because the people that fight this this language thing are often people that fucking suck you know people that are often like I should be able to say whatever I want and and those guys are terrible and they're like we know that they suck but like if if you're making content about people that are going through

experiences you're trying to bring relevance to the struggle they're going through so the money you're making should not be important it should be more important you getting the message out of these terrible things are happening they're clearly not making so they're not doing it for the right reasons, which means you're shitty. 100%. Let's put it this, for example. People who are talking about very serious issues and raising awareness and they don't do that shit.

They're the ones that really care about. They're also smart enough to know that the English language has many things that there are many things that they can say that mean the same fucking thing. That's true as well, yeah. That's the thing that actually annoys me the most. It's that part. It's the unalive where they can just say took their own life. they can say no longer with us.

There are many things that they can say that doesn't have to make some fake kid. You don't have to say grape. Like that's fucking crazy. That's crazy of saying grape. What bothers me. What bothers me is that that looney tunify is such a terrible thing, you know?

That is like the, that is where. I think of like grape Kool-Aid. That's the first thing comes to my mind. I'm like, I'm like, I laugh because I'm like, why are you talking? Like, why are you turning? Just say, I'm gonna have a kid with it's like,

Kool-Aid and twist off things. It's like, hmm, great. She got turned into a grape. Interesting. I would genuinely, I would genuinely rather that people just censored, like with a,

with a black bar at this point. You know what I mean? Just get rid of it entirely. Yeah. Just like, if you're not, I don't know. It's annoying. I don't know.

Anyway. Yeah. Yeah, I have seen that before. Also, a lot of them edit. Spicy, was it? A lot of spicy sleep.

A lot of them edit themselves. They don't have editors, right? And they don't want to go through the whole. That's not true at all. Well, no, I assume a lot. If that's the only way it makes sense. If you have an editor, editor at her,

it's bleep it out for you. Because a lot of contributors I watch, they say fuck things and they have it bleeped out for them. Yeah. Most people have editors now. It's kind of crazy how much people have editors than don't.

I was like, wow. Yeah. Also, people did bleep things out back in the day. I just think people are too fucking, their followers, man. They just got on this train that was unnecessary.

We figured out system a while ago. I'm how to, oh, there's a certain amount of time that you shouldn't say anything. Yeah. There are certain rules. We figured out there are pre-brainiacs

that went through what's okay to say, what's not okay to say, and then it's kind of like maybe a younger generation started being playful with their words and then other people, people that are older than us started adopting this shit too. And I'm like, what are you doing?

Have you? Yeah. Have you seen a significant increase in your money? I know you haven't. I know you haven't. No, but they've seen themselves keep their money opposed to like,

potentially, which is still stupid. The thing about that though Is that like I made a video about this specific thing and I said all the words That video is green So it's not even real You know what I mean? I'm sure maybe on TikTok in other places But like here like no

I've it's not a problem That's what I was talking about like say the scarlet letter thing is much more important than Watching your language it's oh your channel is fucked because the system thinks your channel is just shitty And so it's gonna demonetize things on average versus all these commentators That were greenlit already and for some reason they weren't doing that before and we're greenlit and now they just started adopted this and I'm like

has your I know I know the answer is no rhetorically they haven't seen their fucking monetization explode because they're not in a specific bracket of a of CPM you have to be in a certain bracket like you can be like Philip DeFranco and say the worst stuff but since

he has contacts that give him good ads and knowing that he's covering the news he can say whatever the fuck he wants like it's just a thing where I'm like These people are, like I say, I feel like there's more followers. They just don't have brains of their own. And I'm like, just, first of all, like I said, you can say took their own life instead of unalive.

That's always been available. Even off to themselves. Off themselves. So many euphemisms that already exist. They took a big silly nappy wappy where they won't wakey, achy, upy wuppie no more. Spicesly. They say, yeah. Spicely.

That reminds me of like when people were saying, because that's what I say, was it playful? Remember when people were saying, like, forbidden honey? like forbidden cotton candy What the fuck is forbidden cotton candy? Like insulation insulation? You know What was forbidden honey again?

It was this glass So basically when people would melt Oh yeah yeah Yeah the melted glass And it looks like honey So it's like forbidden honey That's funny I can't stand this blade

Dude oh my god Is someone trying to be funny Spicy Sleep is that or are they actually nerfing All right Let's get the killing yourself? All right, let's go to a scatman, but he's rolling down the steps. Be out, poop, I don't out.

Dude, that's slowed down scatman thing from like the... Was that the extra ammo? What? I think it was. I think it might have been. That shit killed me. That was funny. That was funny.

That was so funny. I was deranged. That was a deranged. Anyway, this guy says, uh, sup, you beautiful. N-weids. Well, let's relax. What mighta?

What, Marta? He says, Hope you're having a fantastic Monday. A few episodes back, 281. You guys brought up Resident Evil 5, Wesker's Hydra Shotgun,

the triple barrel one, and it reminded me of my favorite nonsense weapon I've ever seen in a video game. There was an old Xbox game called Gun, a Western shooter

that predates Redded Redded Redded I remember. I always wanted that game. I never got around to play it. I never got around to play it. Game was crazy. Yeah, I never,

So morbidly destructive, bro. So. I remember seeing it in game magazines and being like, this looks sick. And I just never, I don't know, I never got it. I played it a bunch. Anyway, he says, pre-Dates Red Dead Redemption. The final boss's weapon of choice was a fucking seven-barreled shotgun. And in the post game, you can wield that shit.

That's awesome. Seven. It was powerful enough to turn horses into meat with one blast. My question is, do you guys have? a favorite cartoonically powerful weapon that comes close to not belonging in the setting it finds itself in hard mode no gears three sawed-off shotgun that thing was ridiculous dude but i would argue the normal shotguns ridiculous in that game too like yeah that one was crazy but in pvp and in gears three the sawed-off shotgun would literally blow you up in no the reticle was so small but if you hit

somebody they would just disappear no the radical was big no it was it was it was big remember are you sure yeah because that's the whole point was that like it was like impossible to aim because it was sawed off was that was that Was it was? Yeah. I remember specifically because like generally, I mean generally in game design, like the tighter the reticle, the more accurate the weapon is. But I remember it being like mega wide. I remember hitting some guy with it one time they were running past like they were like ledge hopping.

And half him made it like half him made it to the other ledge. The other half just on the floor in front of me. And I was like, whoa. The guns on gears like really just eviscerate in a way that's not. That is so kind. Like, because I've seen shotguns shoot through meat, right? Like, real meat. And it's like, it's no joke.

Right. It's like a shotgun to the head. It was crazy. But what's there is still there, you know? It's not just gone into mist to the point where like, oh, there's no ribs at all. Yeah, yeah, yeah. There's no bones. Yo, people's top halves in that game, which is pop out of existence.

That's true. It's the funniest shit ever. That is very true. bro. Yeah. It was so, everything about that game is brutal

when you beat someone with your fucking handgun and their head pops open. I'm like, Jesus shit, dude. With the ball time. This game is,

it was such a, it's violent. I wouldn't let my kid play that game. Not my child, you know. I would, they have to, probably like 11.

11, 12. Yeah. It's probably around the time. That's what I'm like, you can play this now. Yeah. That sounds about right. That's too much.

It might have nightmares, genuinely. I think that's good. having nightmares? I think it's, I don't know, man. I remember being attracted to like games and movies that were like way too scary for me when I was young. Specifically because, I don't know, like if I had watched when I was 30, like it would lose all impact. I have definitely overwatched horror things.

And now nothing like that scares me. Yeah, movies don't really. I over did it. I like, I watched like fucking, because I was afraid like possession movies, the demon movies when I was younger. I was like what really scared me And then I just watched them over and over again I was like oh this is stupid But they help because everyone knows movies are really dumb

Yeah they have to be I was talking to my friend recently I was talking to Paul He was telling me that he used to have a fear of being Vaporized Like a real because of like Spider-Man and Mars attacks Oh my God Because of the pumpkin bomb

How it would just like get rid of your skin And just leave your skeleton Just sit chilling there He's afraid of something that couldn't never happen Well he used it when he was a kid He was like is this pot how possible is this It's like that it's like that John Mullaney bit about like quicksand

And now like everybody like if you're a child You thought quicksand would be like a more Like a bigger deal than it ended up being Seeming would get out of quicksand I don't even think I've ever seen quicksand like Like I saw this like white woman and somewhere And like somewhere in the fucking where she shouldn't be obviously Well obviously there's quicksand yeah

And she was like watch this And she like wiggled her leg And like got half out one leg like half out and then did the same with the other leg and he was like all right that's how you get out and I'm like what the fuck I just flipped out of one you've been in quicksand before

yeah I just flipped out of it simple the idea of quicksand you just start grabbing the sand and pushing it under you simple I was like what the fuck I was like oh weird quicksand I just flipped out of it I was like all right this can't hold me I kind of I don't know man I'm kind of I kind of want to sit in quicksand

you want to try it out what it is yeah yeah I mean as long as you have like a In a control of environment or something. As long as you have a harness, you'll be fine. I'm curious, because I just don't understand. Like, I don't understand, because I've seen so many representations of it. Well, do you know what it is, right? You know what it is, right?

I know it's quicksand. I don't know. It's pretty much an idea of that, like, a mud pit, but it's sand. So what happens is that if you move too much, the mud will separate and sink you. But then does it function? Is it functionally that? Like, does that work? But then it still has the same mass.

So what happens is that you're, it's too hard to just swim through. Right. I guess what I'm asking. is, is it really a danger to a person? Yes, they can absolutely kill you. Yeah, well, mainly, if you... I feel like it's only...

If you don't know what you're doing... If you don't know what you're doing... It's not like a tar pit. Like, tar, you're in bad shape. I flipped out of tar, too. It's no big of it. I don't like this. There's a lot of fucking flipped out and it.

There used to be a tar pit. Too much black. Too much. Ew. You just made it water. You were just like, stop. Stop. Stop.

Stop. There used to be a tar pit. in the middle of our living room when I was growing up and it was like... Your dad was like, oh, you know, just jump inside of it and then be gone for three hours.

Coming out, fucking this fucking war pain on and shit. It was very scary. Anyway. I actually can't think of like... They're still here, boy. Obsertily... I'm trying to think of like absurdly.

There was that pulse gun you got at the end of the rest of evil four after you beat the game and you bought that just shot lightning at people. I remember that guy Was that real? Yeah I don't remember that I don't remember that

Maybe I can was in like The Wii one I think maybe I don't remember But you just shot like Energy at people There's also the fucking Getting the Mega Buster proper And dead rising

After you beat the game You got the real Megabuster Oh yeah that actually That's a great answer And it was like What the fuck is What is that? That's a perfect example

Because that really does not belong There Capcom games in general Full of that Because I know in the Mega Man Legends The first X game not just the first X game there's like pieces you get that you can like

collect like pieces of armor bend in a game you can do a show you can So you don't actually need Kill a Sigma with one hit You just need to actually do a specific It kills anything in one hit Yeah So it's the only way it works though

Is you have to have full health Yeah So yeah first you have to do a specific thing To get it So once you get There was a bunch of shit You have to get all the pieces You have to kill this one guy

In a specific way It's so stupid Figuring it out on your own I don't know how you would do it Yeah, like shit like that. I'm just like, this is a game developer that released a video saying I was a regular person that did. Like, no one finds these things. Yeah.

I have a theory that like some of those were made, like some of those impossible things to figure out are literally just a way for people to be like, I actually did work on this game. Yeah. And here's how I, here's how I can prove it. Yeah. I think that's how it is. This ridiculous thing that no one would ever know. And like, I know exactly what it is. Yeah.

And it's like, oh, that's crazy. And then it just like spreads that way. But now it's just like tradition. Now it's just like there'll be a guide at some point. Yeah, because some of YouTube is going to hack it and find out. It's actually happened a handful of times in history where no one ever discovered the Easter egg. And they're like, fuck. Because they were thinking make sure numbers, someone has to replicate this one thing, one person at least.

The problem is someone probably did, but they don't remember what the fuck they did. Right. So then they can't do it again. So it's like it's useless. And then they didn't think about that. I remember there was a Star Wars. like pot racing game that had that too where there was something they figured out there was there was something

a secret thing and no one figured it out and the developer has had to come on and be like hey guys we put something in the game but anyway the Houdukin, Shoreukin is one is uh they did that as well which is awesome it's but it's also very not getting like so positioning yourself to have full health so if you have like an energy tank like you know reserve tank so then you can do that and then do it and kill things in one shot is pretty funny I got all the pieces.

I remember getting the helm was the worst part because you had to come off like a fucking rail thing and then freeze birds and climb up somewhere to a random ledge. And Dr. Lights like, hey, how's it going? You made it this far awesome. Here's a headpiece.

And I'm like, thanks, I guess. I don't know which one that is. It was, I had it on the PSP, but I think it was Megamann X1. That's not X1.

You can't do any. Was X1? No, X1 is, burned into my brain. I know that, I know that. Which one is,

which is, uh, uh, so it might have been the one that was on a game boy. It might have been the one that was on a game boy that got ported to the PSP. The thing is freezing something almost, I don't know, man, because so I,

I know X, I know X one through three like very thoroughly. And you never really had to use other things. It's basically, they didn't make it too impossible to be able to get something. The only thing you would need is you might need another. piece of gear to have true. So to get the

to get the the uh the the the the maxed out X Buster you would have to have the helmet because there was these stupid blocks that you could only fuck up with your helmet X1

so you would have to on the elephant stage which was annoying because you can miss it so you can miss the jump in fall many times and have to start over but that's how you'd get that charged up thing it's stupid it's so fucking stupid but anyway

I love those again um Dude, speaking of Mega Man Legends, you're talking about like a weapon. So there's a rocket launcher that you get or a missile launcher. And if you have enough Zinny, enough money, you could make it infinite. And it's hilarious. It's like that game was cool because you would take pieces to roll. And then she would build weapons for you. And then so you can, she can upgrade it to where you have infinite missiles.

And then everything just becomes hilarious. And that game's crazy. because you can go throughout the entire game and not have some really important shit like these skates like where you just hold down a circle and then you just start gliding through the cities you can miss that

and it makes the game significantly easier and easier to traverse and it MagmaLegans is phenomenal. I've played that game. I love that game. So long. I need a remaster so badly.

I don't even need a remake. I need to fucking remaster. I'm genuinely surprised that those games have not had like a problem. Because I got pretty much everything that I wanted off the PS1 already. Right what I mean? Like all of my favorite stuff on the PS1 is now, especially today, because now like I think over the last couple days,

Legacy of Kane is finally out. Oh, yeah. I'm stoked. It's already? Yeah, it's out. So I'm stoked to get into that, but I want to finish Indiana Jones first. Because I started soccer too and like that ended up being like busted in a certain way. I was like, ah, damn, I shouldn't finish it now because it's busted.

And I moved on to this and I was like, well, I can't move on a fucking like, Legacy of Kane I'll just do it after Yeah But everything Like of Legacy Kane is one of those Like very specific games Where I'm like damn

I'm surprised that that even remotely got attention at all Meanwhile Mega Man Nothing One of Capcom's biggest IPs They That's so crazy It's very frustrating to me In a way that

The the uh The size schooling games Have had multiple Uh Compilations Yeah Of like and anniversaries.

It's like in the legacy collection. They're never doing it. Even before that I had fucking on PS2 I had all the X's. They are, they've done this multiple times with this and fucking Street Fighter and then like for some reason

I don't know what's going on with those, those legend games. Like they didn't even do the third one and then just number one or two just have no fucking love. Yeah. So it was normally going to be for,

I think for DS and then they just canceled it. I don't know what the fuck happened. We know that they went through a hard time for the little. bit. Capcom was downhill for quite a while. It's true, but I just, but now they're back. I don't know, man. They're just, they're just kind of focusing on Resident Evil right now. I'm never making imagine Anuusha before fucking Mega Man Legends. That's true. Megamal. I just wonder maybe it's sold poorly. It couldn't have it. That thing. It was so celebrated that they put those fucking

characters in Marvel's Capcom too. They put in fucking, um, was it those versions of them? Was it those versions of them? They put in T-Bond, uh, the chick with the fucking Bontron or whatever the fuck her name is? Was it those versions of them? Was it the Mega Man Legends version of those characters? The serve bots are from Mega Man Legends, like the Lego people. Holy shit. So that's, no, that's that role, actually, 100%. And then Bonn is from, well, the role, the, the, the, the, the, the, the Mega Man and role was just, just their own entity.

Like, they weren't specifically from, because, um, that wasn't Volnut. Mega Man, Volna is what his name is. Oh, yeah, that's, that's not, that's not, that's not, that's just, that's just, those are just regular Mega Man put into the game. But say, Capcom 2, when they added some people, right, they added, uh, bond. they added fucking the serve bot like they obviously Megaman Legends mean something to them

since they put that in there Right and they just There has to be a logical explanation Why they haven't done it Maybe it has something to do with Nintendo Maybe maybe they lost the source code That kind of happens Oh that would fucking make me sad of shit

Yeah That happens to some games Some games are just gone forever Because they just do like I don't know The fucking code's gone I'm gonna look it up I haven't looked at maybe I don't look at

If I look it up I'm probably get sad But it doesn't make any sense because I feel like a lot of people have not played that, Mega Man Legends, and it's one of my favorites, like top five. I've never played Mega Man Legends. I love that game.

Very good. What was that 64 or PS1? It was on 64 and PS1. Originally, PS1, but you can get a 64 version. I think the 641 had a different name. I think I remember the series of one. It probably was just 64. I think it was 64.

I think it probably was that. And I'm sure it looked a little better, probably. The one thing is, God, the soundtrack is. I still remember the soundtrack. best works. I still remember the soundtrack for that shit. The Mega Man games in general, their soundtracks are probably,

they're pretty great. Probably the best part of their series, honestly. 100%. Uh, yeah. I use that shit for like everything. And also,

if you go into the Apple market in Mega Man Legends, you can go into the CD store and listen to samples of the CDs and even those things are fired. Like, there's like a Baroque fucking thing. It's amazing.

Oh my God, dude. It's so, It's so good. I would love for people. Soundtracks in general are really good. Capcom has, I'm so glad to hit their stride again, dude, because I remember they were like,

because growing up, they were like the shit. And then like, they were like, oh, this is kind of. When we were in high school, they were like, well, they weren't really this shit growing up.

They were more like. Post dead rising. They were, they were riding the reputation of being the shit. Yeah, pre. They were like pre like, oh, we made alpha.

Because I remember Alpha 3. Dude, when third strike came out, bro, I remember it. It was like, oh, 1,02. That was an event. Dude, I remember going to this place called the Laser Park down downtown Manhattan. I remember going there and the fighting game corner of that place was packed. Like to the, like, they had like the little like the little like weird little rides and stuff like that and like the foosball like the, what is it called?

Not foolsball when you throw the ball, whatever it is. Like all those like small ski ball. Skee ball. Yeah, like that shit was popping. But over in the fighting corner I wanted to go over there. It's like you can't go over there. You will get lost. Yeah, everybody was there was just like.

Everyone was grown-ass man Like playing people were just getting fucking Face blasted It was insane I was like wow this is a fucking important moment Loser gets fucking snowballed Luser gets gang bang It's insane

Why would you play What is what is Megaman like Like I don't even think I've seen it What is it? It's like an open world action So it's just like it's a proper It's like a 3D platformer Yeah it's it yeah

And it's open world Just 9con 64 of Megam Man. Is it probably, oh, yeah, is that like it's only,

Mega Man's only RPG, like legit, I think? I guess as well as battle, no, battle network's not, no, that's like a deck building

game technically. Yeah, that game's, that game's just cool. Like, it, it, uh, it's,

I really like Mega Man. It's just one of my favorite, it's just one of my favorite experiences, especially for PlayStation, how, um, how big the game felt too. Yeah.

Like, there was a vast, and so much, like, oh, man, this is walled off. Like, um,

I have to figure out how to get through this. I need specific weapons. I need the actually aspect. Finding a piece of the jet skates, one piece you find in the trash can. And the reason you know, you kick trash cans in the city and it makes a certain sound

to know that something's anything. And you're like, oh shit. And then you're like, there's a fucking broken fan thing. And I'm like, what can I make with this? And you get other shit. That's cool.

And this bitch is like, oh, I can make something for you. And then it makes this cool like, ta-da kind of thing when you have a new That is such a It's a great The soundtrack though is really The video games were really

They were really cute back in the day man They were really like there was like I don't know there was something about like Just ideas You know it was like more of an idea farm Once a amount of time where it was like This sounds cool why don't we put it in Yeah well it's just fun

Fun yeah I think that's kind of I do feel like we might I don't know I could be a little boomerish about it probably Because we're older I actually I don't know Because I actually feel like

we're kind of in that space again for the first time in a while. I don't think we're there any... I don't think it's ever going to be that anymore. Well, I mean, like, not in the same way. But I do think, like, I do think there's, like, less of a concern over realism now

that we can just do it. Yeah. You know what I mean? I look at the game like Astrobat and I'm like, Astrobat would not have been greenlit in the last, in 2010 through 2019 at all. You know what I mean? Like, we just wouldn't have saw it.

Because we didn't. I agree. I think that kind of thing got kind of disappeared. I think the idea of people just truly being able to have fun with things isn't going to exist anymore because of how much money is in a machine. What are building? I think, I think we'll get games that are fun, but games like we'll never get a game like Crash Bandicoot again.

In what way? Whereas it's like this is an idea that sounds silly and it doesn't have an IP backing it to make an idea, you know? Yeah, I mean, I think it's less likely. Well, not never. It'll be hard. And they have to be a company that's already proven themselves to do something like that and do it well. I guess. I guess just to me I look at like, I feel like, I think like AAA has been better in the last like two to three years.

I feel like indie is great. I agree. So like I don't know. But name a name a game franchise that is that quirky that exists. Mack. I think NAC was should try the attempted researches of stuff like that actually. They looked like shit. But it was the human.

It was that the humans looked worse. a knack. They look like the fucking crank anchor you showed me the other day. They, I don't know. Oh, man. It's like, guys,

I understand what you're trying to do, but who did you, who did you think? Didn't they test this? And didn't everybody say, no? Yeah. Ew.

Like, it's kind of my feel about Concord, where I'm like, you know what you? I watched. Ew. What you called ticket levels yesterday? Amazing.

Fucking fantastic. Secret levels. Secret levels. Yeah. Oh. Yeah. It's amazing. I heard about it.

It's amazing, dude. I've heard like mixed things about it. The episode's really good because everybody told me Temple of Doom sucked. I don't trust any of you people anymore. You can't trust people's opinion. It's that there's a, I just want people to think more for themselves. I don't like that there's way too many people that seem to just get their opinion like you said from a YouTuber.

Yeah. Why would you think for yourself when you could just not? And to be fair, I do like like, like, look, I love, dude, I love a good, I love a good video essay. Uh-huh. And I appreciate people who, like, have a thought about something and they make a thing. And it's theirs. You know what I mean? Like, they've formulated it.

Like, that thing I mentioned a couple episodes back about, like, the GTA 4 being developed at the same time that it was, you know, representing. I think it was a dope premise. Yeah. Right? And it's cool. But, like, I feel like a lot of people just, they hear something. It's like, oh, what does donkey think about this? Yeah, yeah.

It's like, oh, that's my opinion now. You know, it's like, I don't like videos anymore. I've kind of grown out of them. I love lore videos though, but that's definitely autism. I like a good video. I like a good video essay. And one thing that I like about one is I can tell when they're being, what I mean is they're not trying to convince you that their opinion is the correct one.

And not in a way that they're being very, they're saying that. But say like I watched a lot of Dragon Age stuff recently. And some of them, the way that they're talking or even their title is is like, what I'm saying is what is true and not just let me tell you my opinion about this because I'm like I want to hear your opinion about it but I don't want you to try to convince me that hey this is dog shit because X, Y, Z

tell me why you think this is dog shit for X, and show me X, Y, Z. The language is very different in essays where there's people that I'm like, I don't like what you're trying to do and I feel like people get kind of coerced into believing them instead of being like that's an interesting thought Yeah.

It's a weird thing where I'm like, you can absorb somebody's thought and not absorb it into your own in a way of just being like, oh, your perspective is interesting. I don't know if I'm fully convinced. Maybe I need to watch more shit. Yeah. Or just, I just like people to be, I'm fine with even that tone as long as like I, the person seems like they care. And it isn't like a, oh, I make video essays about video games. And so like this is the next thing. I think.

I think. When I make a Halo video, it's like, because I give a shit. Right. I mean, I'm not going to make a video about like Street Fighter. Yes. If I do, I'm phoning it in. That's a good point. There has to be a throw line of both, you know, because I can talk about Spider-Man for years, you know, about how much I care about Spider-Man, how much I love the character.

But the difference between some people is that some people have perspectives that though you have to give your perspective as you can without trying to demean others. Just give me a perspective. Because I think I guess I. It's hard, but. And that's a tightrope dance in its own right You know like obviously Because I've been a spider here for like a long time And people have started to confuse about

Like I genuinely think People disagree with me on this I'm not saying it's not amazing I think Spider-Man too is a fucking fantastic movie And I think it has scenes That are the best from Spider-Man Scenes that are insane But I think Spider-Man one is a better movie

I think William Defoe's Performance Outshines everything we've seen from a Spider-Man live action You see in your language How you already said I think I'm completely fine with that. Maybe I'm nitpicking but it's when people are being like

Spider-Man 1 is a better movie. Let me tell you why. And it's it's a, there's a way that people, it almost like people are trying to convince you to think. That's more of a debate. Instead of more, it's just more of like, I'm trying to convince you to think my way,

then let me tell you why I think this. Right, right. And to me, there's something that offends me. But I think I can imagine like that before. I've all had moments like that. The thing is that like, I don't know, I'm getting old. And as I'm getting old,

of kind of just taking steps back from like objective the objective my perspective being objective if that makes any sense you're just being aware that this is not the only way to think or this is not the correct way to think in a way that like say i've watched a i watched a couple of video essays about uh from software games having an easy mode or say why this would be bad and every single one i disagreed with but i was fine with people giving the perspective on it I actually watched a bunch of videos about that stuff. Uh-huh. And I changed my opinion.

I actually agree it wouldn't be, it wouldn't be detrimental because I just don't have to use it. I literally, I went through that whole thing. I had a conversation with Lily and her brother about it, right? Yeah. And I was like, though the game means a lot to me in a combative nature

and a difficulty I experiencing it, that is not for everybody. And people shouldn't be barred out of the game because of that. Well, that was my whole... And I agree. And I agree. I really think about it. I wanted to see if. anybody could actually convince me to not think that way.

I agree. So that was, I was seeking out other people's opinions about that. And some of those people were more, like, say, hostile about it. But I was already like, I don't know if anyone could convince me to, you don't have to participate in this.

And so every thing that I heard, it was mostly more about, like, say, the prestige. It's prestige of this IP that it would make it seem shittier overall by doing this. And I was like, look, maybe, but also I don't have this dogmatic connection to from

software. So I guess I don't feel that way. But some people do. Some people are like, this is the greatest fucking, like, like, this is the greatest game company that has ever lived in their opinion. And they don't want to see it turn like into everything else that has a thousand different difficulties. And I'm like, I understand your feeling.

However, that's just not how I feel. I stand by the fact that I wouldn't partake in it and I think that not every game is built for everyone to absorb but everyone should have the ability to be able to enjoy something you know

yeah I think I think those things are hard to do it's not really an easy thing to be able to make something that I exist in both those spaces at the same time well that's ultimately the that's the challenge

that's kind of the thing like ideally like I wouldn't have a problem in like a perfect world like yeah sure whatever but like I just I do think that there is like develop cost and time that goes into that, that ultimately,

like I think about Breath of the Wild in those games, there's no difficulty slider in that game. I think that results in, like, a better designed game because you're not splitting your focus between different, oh, we have to balance easy

so it's not crazy, or we have to balance normal, so it's, like, reasonable for, like, a casual player, or we have to balance super hard, so it's not unfair, but challenging. Just stick with one difficulty level. You know what I mean?

I think that results in, like, better designed games because it's more focused going into a single vision of something and how things are supposed to function. I actually, I agree with that. The only issue that I have is that they would probably, games overall would probably get more difficult. Just because, if like say, let's just say for the sake of argument,

obviously this is some bullshit. But if there was, everybody's like, we're just only going to focus on one difficulty, everything is going to take a step up because if you were to take a step back, I mean, yeah, I think that shit would fuck everyone. I think it's definitely case by case. You know, but ideally if such a thing didn't demand so much development time and extra focus, I would think like, yeah, fucking whatever, put it easy mode in from so, who cares. Yeah.

But like, I'm kind of staggered that games even have like these granular difficulty settings now where it's like, because I was playing Indiana Jones and like there's like a general setting. There's like a general difficulty. But then there's like, here's, okay, exploration difficulty. A puzzle difficulty. Yeah, combat difficulty. I'm like, oh, that's interesting. Hmm. Look, that's cool.

I like that. But damn, that must have taken it. Development hell. I actually, that's why, look, I would try it. When people, Ubisoft is a punching bag, but I can always give them their flowers for, especially Assassin's Creed Odyssey. I stand by that game being really fucking fun And also when people

Because I'll never forget when people were complaining about some of their UI And some of the HUD shit like that And I was saying Guys there's exploration mode where it turns into Dark Souls essentially It gives you nothing and it shows you nothing And they even says this is how we want you to play But most people are like that's fucking No

It's there for focus groups Because like a lot of people are like where do I go And it's like that's the point A lot of people are like, I don't like this and it's like, well, yeah. So this thing, they give you the options to even stealth. If you suck dick at stealth, which there's a lot of, there's DSPs out there. So like, they give you the option to where the AI is so stupid. Yeah.

You know, and I'm like, I think that's really fucking cool because then they also do in the opposite direction where they make it more realistic. Whereas I turn it all the way up to where it's actually challenging to where they can see you behind the tree. You know, because that's stupid. That's a person right there Yeah, I don't I like that dumb Like there's a It depends on the game I guess

The dumb Like a split or sell game Like I want this The AI to be smart You know what I mean We're like that's the whole point I agree But if it's a game where it's like loose

It's kind of loose There's like stealth elements to it I agree I know let me It can't be too hard Let me be on like I don't care that they can't see me Just because I'm like standing

Just above their eye line Like I'm fine That's cool It sells something I think I was just watching So I did watch Donkey's video on Indiana Jones. Yeah.

And there's a moment like that. Oh, 100%. Yeah. The AI is not smart. He peeks over through the threshold of the door and he keeps trying to throw shit at the guy and then he misses. Like, the guy dodges out of the way. But he doesn't do anything.

He just stays there. And then he goes back and gets more shit. The AI is very much like, the AI in that game is very much like, we're, these are Indiana Jones. This is an Indiana Jones game. Like, it's not, like, they're not. These are clone troopers, man. Yeah, yes.

You're not going to get that. No, these are, these are, sorry. The whole point is that, the whole point is that, the whole point is that, the clothes are dangerous. The whole point is that they're going to catch you. And if they, if they do catch you, you could, you can just beat them up. Yes. And then you're Scott free because that's Indiana Jones. Yes.

It's fine. Exactly. It works for that kind of. For this universe, that's exactly what I, for things, like you said, if this was Splinter's so, you'd be very upset. Dude, it'd be so. annoying if they like if they like were just hyper fucking aware. In any and a joke like no, no. Because you're not

there's no point. There's no point. Like now you're like, oh, I'm literally stealthing the entire time. Yeah. Same thing in like Skyron. My people are like, that's so stupid when you put the bass over their head. Yeah, I put Bass people's head then I fucking cut their heads off. One, two. They don't see me do it. Then I behead them. There is something to, uh, Metal Gear Solid to

where it does have the balance where it's very, very, obviously it's stealth focused, but then you have the box. Yeah. Where it's like, how does this work in any setting? The box is crazy. It's so funny. I would shoot that box.

There could be something really cool in there, though. I just started, I never finished a Metal Gear 5, so I'm playing through it right now. Oh, yeah. Man, what a fun game. It is a very fun game. Like, stealth game, like as a stealth game, it's fucking perfect. Yeah. It is, I think, the best, uh, three.

person stealth game ever. It's so fucking good. It is very fun to play. The weird thing about that game, though, is that it ends in the middle. It's very weird. It's very good. It ends and then it ends and then it just keeps going because it's trying to hammer it in. Like there's like a meta narrative that it's like trying to get you to go along with.

And it's like, I get it, but like I don't care past this. Because I know what you're doing. That's cool. That's cool. That's cojima to me in general. Yeah. He's like very conceptual things. And I'm like, I got the concept ready, but you don't got to keep going.

Well, they finally, they nail that. Yeah, I mean, I get it, but it's a game that's not supposed to end technically. Like me, like, that's stranding. I get it. Like, I tried to play the game again. I have, I'm not like maybe 22 hours into the game. Oh, shit, really? And I'm trying to play it because I really don't like playing the, I don't like, I don't like the narrative.

I really don't like the narrative. I don't like Norman Redis at all. At all. Why? I don't like him there. I just, I feel. like he, I feel like he's so like, you still think of him as like,

Darrell, he's still Darrell. Daryl's badass, don't get me wrong. He doesn't look, it doesn't help that he doesn't change his look at all. It is, like, that is a problem. That is a problem. Yeah.

He doesn't have an emotive face really either. So it's just like, I killed his arm. Where's Merle? He's fucking delivering shit. Where's my brother? The, the movement, like,

walking through that game, trudging through stuff. Yeah. Is fucking pretty cool. I'll give it that. Like, that's pretty cool. That's interesting.

That's the part that everybody has told me, but I personally have just, everything that I've seen, I'm like, I just don't think you would like it. I don't think you would like it. I think you would like Indiana Jones. I don't think you would like that.

I want, I'm not going to, I don't buy, it takes a lot for me to buy games brand new. Yeah. And so, but I'm also. It's definitely not brand new, Derek. What I mean is, Oh, Death Stranding. No, I'm not, I just don't,

I think I'm going to skip Death Stranding. It's been years, obviously, I'm just going to skip. but I just I've seen so much of it and I'm still like I just don't want to do that I don't that's not for it's definitely not for most people yeah it's it's a very specific game Indiana I'm excited for I want to play I want to play Indiana but I just don't get game pass I just don't wait for a sale I have to wait for a sale game pass it'll probably come down soon it's a license game yeah it's it's it's hitting Nazis in the face with a sledgehammer it's so satisfying it is it is it is not gotten is it is it is it right to am I'm I don't know, actually. I think so. I think Sledgehammer's tough face is a... I don't remember seeing like enough blood for it to be considered M or anything.

It was... It's not crazy bloody. It seems like a teen, actually. There is blood, though. Indiana Jones... In the template... No, what is it? Great Circle.

I don't know what the rating is, actually. That's interesting. And I also don't have the box art, so I don't even know it later. I can't even, like, pull an image. Right. from memory It's a machine games game though I feel like I assume it's rated them

Probably barely Barely yeah Like it is but it's like Rated N Rated N Rated N I'm not even gonna ask what the ends for Nearly M

Nearly M Can you imagine Rated NM What the fuck Oh my God God forbid a web page just works Don't you like that I really

I am so baffled. My favorite thing is clicking on an article. And not only is the... Why? He sucks. Why would he step on a shark? Jeff sucks. He's an asshole.

That's so mean. He's an asshole. Yeah. Play the game and you'll change your tune right there. Play the game. I really can't find an answer to this question. Isn't that amazing? I typed in Indiana Jones,

Great Circle, rated M. How weird is that? And I can't fucking find the actual answer. Google is so fucking useless. It is hilariously bad at this point. Okay, so it's rated T.

Jesus fucking Christ. T. Okay. Tee for tits. But to be fair, like Indiana Jones was like PG-13. Yeah, it was never too crazy. I think like the Temple of Doom was like the craziest. Yeah. Yeah. Yes. And even that looks ridiculous. It does.

It's like, it didn't even scared me as a kid. I love that. I thought it was just awesome. I loved it. Kalima. That shit is fucking dope, bro. I can't even... There's an action sequence where they're like shooting on like, they're on mind carts. They're on like fucking mind carts and then they shoot and then they're outrunning a flood and then they're like, it's insane. That movie's fucking awesome. It's very like actiony Resonable 4 to me. It feels like a Resident Evil 4 movie. Yeah. Like straight up. Yeah. Even everything from like the cultists to like all of it.

That no Nazis, I guess. Heart written out. he's set on set on fire. Yeah, he gets his heart of that. He's still alive. He gets his harder at that he's still alive. He still alive. The wound seals. They dip him in a what, like,

Sauron's eye or something? Because it was a pit of like, it wasn't lava. They dip him in like a pit of like bad. Evil. Yeah. Like it's crazy. It's fun, man.

Motherfuckers are, you know what I did see? The main complaint that I did see was like, oh, like short round. And also. I think the girl's annoying because she screams all the time and it's like, yeah.

I mean, wouldn't you? I personally love that because it's like she's in a horror movie and everybody else is in like an adventure. Yeah. I love that aspect of it. She's terrified the entire time and him and this little,

Indiana Jones, Harrison Ford in this little Asian child they're playing cards. And it's like, it's awesome. I think it's great. I feel like say Gen Xers, yeah, they probably really didn't like Temple of Doom

because of that extra stuff that was added to it, but it came out when I was a kid and even watching it now, I'm like, I'm not watching something serious, so I don't need it to be, it's like say,

uh, I wouldn't compare, they would probably think of it in the way that, uh, episode one is, but I'm like, no,

it's not that jarring. It's not jar jar, it's not fucking young Anakin. It's not that jarring. Look, dude, I like jar jar jar. I'll never not like jar, Jard Binks.

I understand, I watched more Sith Lord stuff. And I know, and I know, George Lucas denied but I don't believe him because like the more I've been watching more theories and I'm like bro

first of all there's the footage of him saying Jar Jar Jar's to key to all of this and I'm like nigga why would you say that George Lucas says that if we can get Jar Jar working I think I think this is really going to take off I think it'll finally rhyme if we get Jar Jar Jar Rhyme finally Jar Jar Jar

Rhymed with so much already I think Dark Car Rhyrs with Car Car There's something about it rhymes with Car Car It rhymes with tar tar, far, far. It rhymes with far, far away. Like, Shrek. He says that.

Well, Shrek is. Shrek came out before, didn't it? No. No, definitely not before. No, it was around the same time, but after. My times are mixed up around it. Because Shrek, I think, it was 2001. It was around 9-11.

And what was episode one? Oh, 2000. Yeah. No, no, 99. Was it 99? 99. I think it might have been a 90. That was the first.

That was one of the first ones I remember seeing in my life. I remember going there and getting the little sippy cup of Darth Vader's head on it. And being like, this guy seems interesting. How did you, did you like the movie when you saw it? I was really young. Oh, right. You were really young. Right, right.

99? Well, Shrek is 2001. Okay. And I remember. So, Phantom Menace, you said? That was the first one, right? Yeah. Phantom Menace, 1999.

Okay. Damn, nailed it. Isn't that crazy? That's the 90s time. Yeah. It's weird. I love how hard. I love how hard body the stance of Darth Mall is when they show up.

And it's like, now there are two of them. And it's sidious. And then Darth Mall is just, I'm angry. I have horrid. That nigga said nothing. He didn't even say like six words at home. He didn't even say words. I don't even remember.

He said, finally, master, it is our time. Yeah? I don't even remember. He said that. I don't know. Because I was like, this guy was like, why is he not? How is this guy Darth anything? And he's just not doing anything.

Because he was... To be dark, would you have to be fucking important? He was just an apprentice. That's it. But even so. Whatever. I'm not going to get that problem about fucking episode one. I don't care.

And then like he got killed. He got cut in half. He didn't even get killed. Was he supposed... I heard that he was supposed to make a return in the... Then the sequel, 7, 8, 9. Jarger? So, this is all speculation.

I don't know exactly true. Apparently, it was supposed to be him. as the main villain. He became with the main villain. He becomes a Sith, the Lord of the Sith. Yeah, and he has robot legs and shit.

Yeah, well, because he goes in Clone Wars, in Clone Wars, he survives. Yeah, he does. That's right.

They give him like, he fucks the Mandalorians. Darth Mall? Yeah, yeah, damn it. I was, I was,

you know, I was a quick enough. I was a quick, that was a quick enough. Yeah, he was supposed to have a apprentice by that point, too.

Wasn't that in a movie, too? No, he didn't, well, in Clone Wars, yes. Oh, right.

In Corn Wars, he'd find his brother, Savage repressed. I swear to God. But it's such a fucking edgy ass name Savageo oppressed. It's so fucking, it goes hard, but also only to me because I'm stupid.

His name's Savage? Savage oppressed. It's so stupid. It is, it is, but is Star Wars, though. It is so dumb, but I get it.

What was the, the race of, what was it? They were taking a jab at the Nemoenians, or what is it? it? What do they look like? Fuck.

Fucking doodle? There was something... What were they? Mioi, minoi. I think it was the... I think it was the Japanese sounding ones. Oh, the part of the Trade Federation? The Trade Federation.

Yeah, but was it? Were they the... That shit had to be rolling, even as a kid. Dude, the Trade Federation was hilarious. I remember... I never actually watched those movies until, like, way later, but like I played Star Wars Jedi Starfighter. And they have, like, the trade... You're fighting the Trade Federation that whole game, I think, from what I remember.

And the voiceovers are so funny. It is bad. He is jettling. Please get me out here. I'll buy you a whole planet. Starfighter. It's like, stop. I get what he's coming from, but it's like, I look, dude.

Okay. So you got to, you got art imitates life, you know. Apparently, apparently, I don't know if this is true, but people were saying the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, noydians was, was a jab. At least they took the name from Leonard Nimoy. Because like it was saying it's like every once in while There's these little shots at Star Trek And they were saying that was one of them Just taking Leonard Nimoy's name

And call them the Nemoids I fucking hate it I don't know if that's true Wouldn't surprise me Yeah I hate him I hate him That's why I was just saying like Savage oppressed doesn't Doing things like that isn't

That's such a JK Rowling ass fucking name Every Darth person has a stupid Darth Sidious Darth Tyranus Darth Mall Assage Ventress Mall wasn't entirely obvious to me

It's pretty Darth Mall Because malls is like what do you mean A weapon or two completely Destroyed attack somebody I guess It's not quite like It's not like Cidious and tyrant though Yeah

Taurus Tiranus Tiranis What if those Tyrannosaurus Can you have been That's his son That's Duku That Duku's dark fucking

He's just the fucking Tiranah He's still himself, but he's like, re-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h. He is a regular. He just has, he just really likes dinosaurs. He likes dinosaurs. He likes dinosaurs from the human world of earth.

I got to tell you, I actually would enjoy that much more. That's just, yeah. R-h-h-h-h-n-now-that. Why using Masashi-to-one-hand style, the rapier style? So, fucking, God. Darth rapier. Darth Raper. Did you just say Darth Raper?

I don't rape people. I rape concepts. Not people. No, like rapier. He has to constantly correct people. Everyone just calls them dark rapers. He's called him dark rapist.

He's like, no, rapierist. I'm a rapierist. I'm a rapierist. I'm someone who uses a rapierre. What's so dumb. I'm so mad. What do you move on? Fencer?

What would you call those people? Drapierreists. Rapierists. Fencing. is any sword fighting. I'm a rapier user. I'm a rapierist. I'm a rapierist. I'm a fencer. I'm addicted of fencing.

Is that like gooning? Like fencinging? Or like, is that using like fentany? Yeah, fensinol. Fensinol. I'm addicted to fensinol. It's a drug that makes you like on guard.

Someone during a fencing match just drooped over. You fucking dip. I love how they be standing. They be standing out. Well, that's not fentanyl. That's like that weird That's that yeah Trane that mix of fentanyl and something else In Kensington, Pennsylvania

Oh my God Like they're like Slurped that they look like a fucking sea Is that one they start like Turning into zombies where it was like They're rotting and shit Was it that one? I don't know about that one

That's Crocodile I think Crocodile Crocodile Crocodile You take that shit You give that to a zombie And it turns back to a person So we've had to cure

That into a zombie They had to cure the entire time So why did they use that in the fucking... I am legend to imagine. Will Smithing checks a fucking zombie with and it's like... Whoa. Whoa. Whoa.

Whoa, I was bugging. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'll read this one. Well, I'll say this thing. We'll read the last question. Then we'll get the fuck out of here. Yeah.

Do you guys see the trailer for 28 weeks later? Years. Oh, years. Years later. No, they're not continuing this. Dude, I got it looks pretty, it looks, well, I mean, the trailer's great. Who the fuck knows? But I, what do you see?

It looks good. Did you guys even watch Weeks? Weeks was ass. Did you watch weeks? I did. We walked out of the theater. You walked out of theater? Because I was just like, it wasn't that bad.

It wasn't that bad, but it was one of those things where I'm like, I've seen enough. Yeah, I was like, I get it. The, the aesthetic of how it was compared to one. One's, the sway was shot was really good. Like the shooting, the cinematography of one is like insane. insanely impressive because it feels like you're watching like almost a sort of recording, I guess, in an interesting way, even though it's not being like a shaky cam movie. So it's really interesting and it's a very good movie. Weeks wasn't bad.

It wasn't bad. I just didn't care. But it was very interesting. It was very interesting. I need, I would, I should watch it again. I was in the theater. I was just, I was not interested. And I don't know, man.

I think there's enough. apocalyptic zombie-esque things I get you yeah I fucking but it hasn't been many recently there's been a lot before I don't want another renaissance dude I don't want I don't want I don't want it I don't want it I don't want it that was all our like early

late middle school early high school was totally everything was zombies cause you these zombies I just want to me only Resident Evil should do it at this point Resident Evil because it's the only one They're just fucking things it's so stupid and interesting Right like I don't want like I don't want

I didn't want World War Z I understand that it was like a good book or whatever I just don't fucking care that game was pretty good actually I was it

It wasn't bad I mean it's like a like good and like a double A way you know like I don't think it's nearly It's not like triple A or anything But there was like a left for dead

Kind of feel that it got It just did the same thing The Back for Blood did Where it just got a little too complicated Like it was just like Oh here's a scope for your rifle It's like no just give me a fucking rifle man We're not all like

fucking military service man We were like these are supposed to be like mailmen and and, you know, fucking, you know, accountants. Yeah. They're not supposed to know, oh, this is a fucking ACOC scope. Like, no. Yeah, I don't know. I don't know what that is. I don't care.

The fuck out of here. Is that accountant? I love a lift driver. Fucking just, these are supposed to be normal people. One guy could have, could do that. You have like one veteran. Don't you love the, uh, the fucking moment from Red Day. I'm from not Red Dead Day.

I'm from last of us to where Ellie's like, we're customizing her thing in and she's attack. I did actually That moment's actually fucking really good Because it just breaks the way the games working the whole time That's like when the safe room And I can't remember which Resident Evil was But one of the safe rooms Is it two? Is it too?

It might be two in the mansion Like because you think you're safe in that main hub With the with the black cop That's like And then he just waltz in And you're like oh what the fuck That piss Because like there's a yeah

There's a typewriter there in it Well Is there not there is there is So you're walking It's supposed to be good There's the entrance There's the side in the left that has the club door and everything like that.

Then there's all the type with like is the, um, the main desk has like the security thing, the typewriter, the black cop that's bleating out. Bleeding black man. Bleeding black. I want to get a real typewriter and put it on like a really small circular table next to my front door so that I can save my progress.

But you should also have a speaker playing that fucking. The enter the whole time. Dude, my whole life. Yeah, you got to come back. Yeah. Got a lot.

I was so fucking good. Great. Great. Oh my God. That game's so good. Last question from Queen Elizabeth. Queen Pi-Fi. Queen Pi-Fi?

Or Pifi? Pifi? Pee-fi? What is that? Pussy-Fi? Is it like high-deaf pussy? Is that what that is? Pi-fi?

She says, hey, y'all. Since you mentioned the distaste for sweats in games, what do you think about tech that's fun to, that's just, wait, that's fun to just do but advanced. Since you like M-Row versus Capcom, too, for speed, wave dashing makes the game faster and snappier while being required for high level play.

So I guess the idea is like... Wave dashing isn't a Vc2i, I forgot. I kind of forgot that too. I didn't... I remember only from Smash. I only remember it from melee. Yeah. But was it in...

I'm pretty sure it wasn't NV2, yeah. Not the same exact concept. I don't think I ever learned how to do that. It's still jitter. It's still jitter movement. Pretty much moving on frames that aren't there. So your character, instead of going like this, he's just here than here.

I think, look, I think there's certain... Fighting games is, like, maximum sweat. Because you're immediately, like, you're never not around... You're always center stage. You're competing. You're never not in the moment of, like, competition. Sure. I would say, like, some of the more fun stuff that's, like, advanced, but, like, kind of...

I think about, like, grenade jumping in, like, old first-person shooters, right? Oh, yeah, that's cool. I like doing that because, like, it shows a level of skill, it shows a level of understanding, but it's not like, it's not necessarily going to get you out of a, it's actually kind of going to put you in a detriment if you're fighting because you're probably just going to kill yourself or you're just going to set yourself up really poorly

for the next thing that you're going to be in. If you're really lit like that, you can grenade jump into snapping shots and you're just him, you know. That's crazy. It's bigger than you, you know. I love grenade jumping there.

Like, I wish that was more common, but whatever. Yeah, that's cool. I love the reverse jump, the reverse leaping jump from Mario 64. Oh,

that shit's ridiculous. I could do it. I can't figure out. It's so fucking stupid. That's how speed runners do, right? Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa! They just fucking teleport through the map. They jump backwards because it's faster.

You do the lunge jump, but you reverse the input, so you jump backwards. And what happens when you jump backwards, you keep gaining speed the whole time you do it. Yeah. So a victory of a certain threshold of speed, a door can't keep you out. It's like I'm so incredible for all the wrong reasons. That is, that is Another Nintendo That is what Nintendo was for a long time

A game that they refused to remaster as well Yeah They put out that dumb I know it's Nintendo It's just like Also remastering making that game would ruin it It would ruin the I want photorealistic Mario

That game Wow Like are we talking about from the fucking 90s movie or Louis? No, you know that stupid You know that stupid You know that stupid photorealistic Mario image that was like

It was really popular when we were kids It's a depressing image Foto realistic Mario Everyone will have seen this if you Google it yes it's the fucking first One that comes up That's what I want Oh man

I want that so If we do get if we ever get a Mario 64 remake there it is There he is In all of his glory Look at him I want to pull his nose you know Dan-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-d-d-d- yeah that's it

Mario Mario Mario and Yoshi Luigi's his brother and he shot some guy in a vacuum head out of the y'all's hell All right

Let's move on Let's get the fuck out of here We're going to read your $25 Patrons And y'all- Not you That was a

Is that krillin? Yeah That was kind of perfect Yeah You probably can't do that as perfectly again. Oh, no, absolutely not. That was an absolute, that was a perfect krill in action. You only get one shot.

And then when you're on the spot, it doesn't work. Yeah, it's over. Yeah. Yeah. Imagine having, like, consistent, like, fucking talent. Yeah, imagine that's crazy. Instead of accidental spurts. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Yeah, like, imagine truly being funny, you know? Like, not needing your friends to be funny, like just being hilarious all the time. That would be crazy. I'd be on stage, me. Hey, you heard about this? Yeah. You know about this Jar Jar Jar guy? I think he's the key.

You're really one of those that really wants him to be a Sith Lord. I think I would have been interesting him being a Seth Lord. Because Tongans can't use the force. That would have been crazy if he was like... So he was just raw talent. Insanely good about it. He could flip 40 feet in the air just because... His species, yeah.

Yeah. That's the thing. What were they gungoids? Gungons. Gungoids. Don't like that. That sounds like a racist. A slur of them

You fucking gungoid Come here Suck my dick gong goate Get over here Gung gigger Gung giggers Giggers Giggers

Guggers is crazy Gung giggar All right No he's a weird little thing He's the thing He's the thing I think he's the key I think I can't wait to get it

I can't wait to suck his peepee The idea of him The idea of him killing Mace window Would have been funny May's like What are you doing here Do we have a way to Die black

Mur Just like So like So much A bunch of lightning, it's great. He says die black. He's like, you're racist to black people? I hate black people.

I hate humans in general, but I'm defining what you are. I want my characters to hate black people also. I want that to be four black people in the universe. I'm really pissed off at black people because all they do is rhyme. All they do is rhyme. I don't think anything is rhyme. They make everything wrong to me. Everything's so pleasant.

I feel like only I have the responsibility to make things rhyme. I feel like it's my mantle of responsibility. And they've stolen it from me. me. They throw it for me so easily. They do it. They do it. They keep stealing, just like they steal everything. They steal. Oh my God. I love the meek. The idea of like meek George Lucas like, like saying deceivingly racist stuff. Seatingly racist things, but with no real conviction. Yeah. Yeah. He's so, he's so probably not racist. Probably. There's like nothing that would. There's nothing that would indicate. Yeah. I mean, you point to like, I guess, the accents in the in the movies, but like, that's kind of. But that's kind of. But that's. more just that's more of like that's just what we did really that doesn't make it right but like that's what happened you know like it's like because because also about that let's not

pretend like there aren't people who do literally sound like that that is like that is a real voice you know obviously now in society obviously we're like we're not gonna i'm not we're not gonna make a snark tank fucking video uh fucking uh extra ammo but we're trying to make the moulon sound track again and we're sounding like fucking oh Manchu. Would that be funny? Hell yeah, that'd be funny as much. I'm not going to do this.

There's too much, there's too much assumption of me. There's too much context of me being anti-Asian. This honor! They'll dub. He dubbed himself. We got to get the fuck out of here. All right. Thank you guys for supporting.

Thank you for watching Patreon. Patreon.com slash tank. Jump over there. Starttank. Shop for merch now we'll kill you. We're going to read the $25 dollar on patrons. Now count me down. Three, two, one.

One of Kings are coming soon. Rayshal slur Rache out slur Rache al slur Is that a racial slur Yes That's the best name Cinema

Cinema That's amazing That's the best For that to be the opener is great too That's the first name in the credits Is that a racial Rageau slur D.C. Get on it

Get on it Get on it! What was that day? I can't remember clip that is. Bill Burr. Yeah, okay, that is Bill Burr. Get on it. All right. Oh, man, that's beautiful. He's been, he's been on the fucking Tyre Day. I love, yeah. He's, he's like, you're really

surprised they killed this guy? Yeah, he's been, he's been, he's been, he's been, he's been, uh, I've been sharing those, because he's, he's a very, I mean, even though he's extremely wealthy now, but he's still like a man of the people. Yeah, there's some, there's some, there's some dumbasses that like, oh, what do you know? And I'm like, nigga, he got rich in his like 40s, late 40s. Yeah. He's like, he's been. struggling forever. Yeah.

He's, he's, he's one of the guys where it's like you're, you can make jokes, but like, yeah,

whatever, Kingston. There's real parts of this. There's real parts of these things that are going on. Like, being a comedian doesn't, it's fucking crazy.

You're a rapist. You know? I mean, like, I didn't do it. I've seen the picture. That's you in it. That's you.

I see you there with your snaggle, tooth. And your stupid canines and your lazy eye. I'm seeing you. That's you. That's a picture of yourself. You inbred loser.

You know? You know? How do we convince them to get on the podcast? How do we convince Bill Byrd somehow to trick him to think that this is way bigger than it actually is? Yeah, we'll tell him it's, I don't even, I don't even know what a Bostonian would. Yeah, what are they? I don't know. I don't even know if he likes it.

that is true i actually just a cigar i know he looks a cigar yeah come come on our show it's all about cigars and sports it's sports yeah yeah we have a sports cigar show fuck but he has a sports podcast i don't fuck yeah so that's fine oh yeah so i guess he it makes more sense it's like an in it's like come on our sports show it's it's big it's you know it's bigger than uh the bill simmons yeah yeah and all these other sports people steven a smith or whatever yeah it's big like Shannon Sharp and Stephen A. Smith hosted the show. And we'll try to convince Billver that you guys, Shannon's sharp and Stephen A. Smith. You got to get your haircut like this.

I guess so I'll do my Stephen A. Smith. You'll do the Stephen A. Smith. You'll cut your hair. You cut your hair so like the back of you with the front of you or two different people. I have that like those old Asian monk haircuts. So. So. And then we're going to cut yours down and you're just going to be like, oh, damn.

Oh, damn, it's me, Shannon. Leave me alone. Oh, shit. Don't make fun of Shannon Sharp. I really like Shannon Sharp. I love them for years. Did you my sex tape? Damn.

I was putting that white bitch in a place. I was pretty fucking stretched out good. I fucking sniffed her. She might be what she would, she would bones dry. She died. I love Shannon. He's a really fucking cool, man. He's my sex tape.

It's called the sharpest tool in the shed. That's so fucking stupid. He's in way too. I'm gonna have shape with someone his age, dude. He's an insane, like, absurd shape. Well, I'm not really. You see that video where his colon colon fell out? Oh, damn, my colon fell out of the plug here.

Gotta suck it back up my rectum. It's like, you guys have one of those vacuings that, like, if you, you stretch the cord out and then you press the button and it retracts back. Yeah, yeah. It's scary. Oh, damn. It's like a fucking, what's it called? Like measuring tape. That shit is, yeah.

Coal went back up is that. Measuring tape and that vacuum thing. Remember we used to have that in the apartment? What? The vacuum with the plug that would retract. Oh my God, I remember. He's cut me once. It's fucking violent.

It's like fighting, he's literally like fighting Indiana Jones. Boy. Boom! Me and Jay used to make this joke where Daredevil would fight, not Daredevil, would go so out of fight people, and he'd have like a blunt nub at the end of his chain that he'd be on fire. And he'd whip people with.

that it'd be on fire flaming metal numb why would he be whipping people is he like the spirit of a slave master he's just whipping people

he just whipping people he just waving god damn go down down you know we're doing that when you think about that

can't like that I've never heard Chan it's time in my life go go yeah

well I'm from the South look man I ain't don't know doing shit like that I can't even sound like it

It's close to that, but we have to have the stuff he knows too. Yeah, stuff he knows. He's like, you know, you don't like this. You know, hey, oh, skip. Hey, what come here, Skip. He's, skip, my rectum fell out. He's clearly, like, like, he's clearly. He's like, that's crazy.

That's crazy, man. That's crazy. It's crazy. He was a country fucking, country fed motherfuckerucker. Shannon, that's crazy. Leave Shaq alone. How'd your colon fall out? Leave Shaq alone.

My rectum. fell from my height, it'd kill me. Yeah, it's difficult being six stories tall, man. I'm six stories. My rectum five stories. My penis weighs 24 pounds, literally. If I flap my dick on this table,

this table would burst inside of itself. My back hurts in a way you can't understand. My back hurt. Shannon, Shannon, how do you, how many time you're calling fall out on the day? I'm about 17. They have three-hour podcast Talking about how their colons fall

I'm like Wait wait Way to happen again Oh shit It's happening right now I love I like I like Buffalo guys

It's crowing It's crying It's crying It's crying I'm I'm fucking I'm fucking We're on the first

name Oh my God That was the first name. Rachel slur. Rachel slur. That's it. I love them, dude. Don't make fun of Shannon Sharp.

He's really cool. He changed the sport. He's a Hall of Famer for sure. No one's making fun of him or his colon disease. I love him, but I will absolutely flame him. Anyone can get it. Hey, man. Come on, babe.

Come on, babe. Come on my shit. Oh, my God. We went to see the Christmas ballet and they come in my ass. Turns out I accidentally bought tickets to the crack nutter. And they just... That is so bad. He went to see the nut gracker.

He didn't say the nutther. And then they... They fucked him. They fuck you even though you didn't want it. So they raped you. So they raped you. Excuse me. They did it grape you.

The crack nutter is so dumb. I wish I thought of it. The thing is it must be. We've probably thought of it in our lives. We were like, oh, that's going to go in a recycling bin. Right, because it's not useful. If I put the crack nutter porn, it must exist. It's Emma throwing in dollars.

Flexing being a day one listener like a Destiny Veteran flex is playing the D1 beta when sharing a bad opinion. Bussy music. Bussie music. Joe Rogan eating. What the hell would that be? Joe Rogan eating Jamie's face for checking facts. Metal Gear Hitler The tank that shoots

Nukes exclusively at Israel Well, that would be a metal gear, wouldn't it? My co-worker My co-worker kept threatening To throw a du rag on my head and give me waves Star Tank featuring Americano Moka Latte and Black Broly sticking his

Berser penis in between Sweeney's Gap Oh man, Cat Black I was wrong and gay. I'm sorry. You forgive it. It's okay, cut. Have a nice gay, stereophilix.

It's not there. Wizard, W-G-D-Z-Z-F-O-S-Z-G-U. Contemplate this on the tree of woe. Our world is a pseudo-sacrosanct perversion. Just beat Stevie Wonder in a staring contest. That's not a name.

That's just how I feel. This is how I actually feel. Domination. Vaughn of the Dead. This is one thing that came up when I was looking for it. Busting nuts in heads, 10 minutes. In heads. Is that from X video?

Yeah. But what does that mean? In heads? Like, are they going through your orphuses in your head? Someone getting cum shot up their nose is a fucking... I mean, because it's not on. It's in heads. X videos is like...

That's like Applebee's, right? Yeah. What do you remember that? Like, okay, so let me put it this way. Like, there's size like X and XXX. And that's like 7-11. That's like a, that's like, uh, so what is porn hub then?

Pornhub, I would, I would say is like, is the pinnacle. That's like, yeah, that's the standard. That's the best one. Yeah.

Well, I mean, it's, I think it sucks. It's, but it's the, like, of those websites,

it's like the one that I trust the most. Yeah. You know. X videos, you, you know. X videos is like, purge, man.

We foot a great purge. I had fucking, I had all of attack on Titan on my porn up account. I had fucking a bunch of like, I love to use your porn hub account to pirate That is so funny Or people in the comments being like This is great, a great episode

Yeah, they're like actually philosophical debates and shit Aaron was not wrong And not just dick hard Someone typing my dick hard In a porn comment are insane It was one of my It was the only reason for me To actually log on there

But the thing is it was like What genre has the worst comments And after a while it was it became like the yeah to me it was the step stuff it was like it was that shit it became so popular

like a lot of people converged on it and it was just stupid uh thing the one thing that I couldn't what made me mad is that so many titles were not actual

what you were watching and no one gave a fuck that was the thing they were there for a reason yeah that's they didn't care they were just like oh it's good enough and

Don't beat my dick to this stuff. The comments on Shannon Sharp's colon videos are crazy. Yeah. Vona of the Dead. Bum now with a job still wasting $25 a month on this shit. I listen to that gay venture grovers every day. I can watch This Is Us through the Gap in Sweeney's team. Do you all just let your doo-doo fall in the toilet or do you catch it?

I hate that clip. I never knew about that till. Wait, time on. Was it you that brought it up? I never brought that up to you guys. Time out. What do you mean? No.

It's a guy he's on a podcast And he's talking about like You just let your doo-doo fall on the toilet You don't catch it And he's like Why do you think people wash their hands And it's like because they gotta touch the doo-doo I don't think it's real

I think he's just doing it bit No one no way Someone shits in their hands It must be a bit Washes their hands with toilet paper It's so insane It must be a bit Because it doesn't make

How would you get to that I mean there's To be fair There are ways There's a people Who are fucking weird To the point where there's people that

they stand up to wipe they do different things like they have different like tactics and I didn't know I thought it was very I just thought it was very basic like you don't have to do you don't have to do too much to wipe your ass you don't have to do that much

No man It's so simple Unless like you know I had like certain You wipe until until you see red On the paper and then you know you're clean There are certain people So your ass is bright, fucking red. No, until there's red on the toilet paper.

Yeah, then you know that all the poo's gone. There's no more poo. There's only blood. But that's, that's how you know. That's clean. Otherwise, how do you know? Crispy fucking clean, man. Yeah. Yeah, I don't know.

I do be clean. I mean, look, look. No shade. No shade people have weird fucking things, except for the one. If you're catching your shit, all the shade. All shade. 100%. You've got a real life scat man here.

I'm the skatman. Yeah. Shitting in my hand. He's still scatting, though. He's scatting about shit. He's scatting about shit. Yeah. Poor guy.

I'm a shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit. Shit in my hand. I'm the shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit. Shit, shit, shit, shit in my hand. Shit, shit, shit, shit in my hand. Dude, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit in my hand. All right I can't believe that guy

I can't believe that's a real song I know It is insane Actually I would love to find a like a documentary on how they're doing a documentary on I'm actually now actually I'm not joking that sounds like a joke They are actually Because I think we googled it recently at like a friend's house

And it like came up like Oh there is a documentary but it said in production Oh wow Which is weird timing I don't understand why they're waiting this long. It's going to be called shit man. It's going to be called the guy who no one fucking understood or cared about.

I just saw one of the worst. That's a crazy title. That's so mean. I just viewed one of the worst. That was so dily mean for no reason. Yeah, that was just harsh. That was harsh. The title of the second reason is the guy no one understood or gave a shit about him. People gave a shit about him.

That dude's kids listen to this podcast and I'm like, fuck. I'm so sorry. You're right. I don't like my I'm sorry The scat Too Did they cry

when they skat? We're Where, where, where, where, where, where,

where, where, whew, I'm a sad kid. Oh my god. Oh, my God. That's such a fuck.

I was, I would beat somebody to the scat family. I would not. I'd leave them be. You would? You're your own.

If I have a kid that cried like that hit him. For sure. I would absolutely smack him until he cried differently. I've thought about like, am I going to hit my kids? And I've come to the decision that I am not going to hit my kids. Well, it never happens because you plan on it. If I'm not going to hit it. You don't wake up one day and you're like, I think I'm going to hit my kids today.

No, your kid does something and you're like, damn, I'm going to have to hit you. If I haven't hit Lily, I'm not going to hit my kids. Look, I have. No, that's different. That's different. I have no desire to hit my kids. But if they do something like crazy, like, oh, you burn down the neighbor's house, then, you know. I think what I think the,

the best thing. Try him as an adult. Now, see, how do you feel about a Spider-Man slap? What do you mean? We're like,

the Spider-Man slap. Like when, Oh, when Norman? When Green Goblin hits Spider-Ram in the weekson. Oh, yeah, the little.

I feel like kids need more of those. Bitch. Like, if you're going to hit your kids, that's the way you should do. No. I would have, I would absolutely.

I can see my stuff. I'm going to come on. I'm going to let the universe teach them their lessons. I think flicking's nice. That is the universe. I am, I am part of the universe.

We are all Stardust. I feel the grass ice and says. They call him a dork and flick him a little bit. I might do that. A little, you know, a little, no, that was,

he was getting his ears pierce to clears. Mm. God's, I'm gonna one inch punch him. Godspeed, son. God speed, scat, man. Skat, man.

You kill him. Oh, but that one of the, oh my God. That's crazy. He flips over the guy Scatty. That

Oh my God. It is incredible. That is Peaks in a month. Scorsese is a fucking ovation right now. He's all. Everyone is. Oh.

He's fucking, dude. Anyway, yeah. So to the Scat family, I'm sorry. Yeah. Shout out to the Scatman and Robin. Shout out to Scatman and Robin. Scatman is shit And it's crazy

There was a fucking There's a timeline Where he became the dictator Of the world And then all media Is Scatman related So the Batman's gone It's now Scatman

He became a powerful fascist leader Scatman He would hypnotize people With his fucking dead language Right We pledge our allegiance to the scat You know So we like put our hands in

We're gonna be Bop bapap da da pop He's speaking cutiform I think That's crazy What the fuck The Scat Avengers, the Scavangers, the Scatters. The fucking fast and scatterers.

I don't know, like it just... The X-Scat. The X-Scata, Scata, Scata, Skat, Skat, Spat. Bip. Bipabla-Bababab. Bip. Skat. Bap. Bap.

Bip. Bip. Bip doesn't even get a beep. Beep. It doesn't even scatter. It's right. We can't. This is already a fucking disaster.

let's go bop let's scat bob let's scat bob Bip Bop

Bop Bip Bap Oh man Skating really is just Gat Nito It's Scat

Nito Scat All right We got it We can't We can't We're here All

It's turn of the entire I can It's not earth It's scurth It's a sucks. Top rappers. One nods,

two slick Rick, three Lauren Hill. Lauren Hill? I don't, she hasn't, her catalog's too small. Lauren Hill is a extremely talented.

She's very talented her scatolk. Here's a, oh my God. Oh my God. He said her catalog. Oh my God. Oh God.

I got to go to bed. Scatologue. I can't believe I said that. Her catalog. The fucking scatastrophe. I don't even have one. I don't even have one to use. That was too much for me.

Yeah. I'm running on Scats right now. I'm running on scatts. I'm sitting all over myself right now. I'm about to lose my colon, man. I'm going to shit my colon into the ground. God damn, shit my myself again. Sorry about that.

Fucking shit down on the toilet. Coal and fell all the way down in the pipes. Megan the stallion was going on yet. I had to call a plumber to get my colon out of the other legs. Making the stallion is going on here. Oh, my God. Shack, you got your colon in the toilet again. Yeah.

What about you? Man, I got I got my cold stuck in a Skip Bayless's mouth You don't even know That's crazy I'm still sitting on my toilet

I got my colon down there If I stand up I'll pull my entire skeleton out Shack, chat Shack How are you still on your toilet But you're sitting in my interview chair right now I shit in your chair

And then I grind my ass on it We gotta go You know what I'm saying in my chair You shit in my chair Exclusively Shagg You skit Why you're sitting in my chair

Skat Scat I want to hear Shack Scatting Praise the scatman Overlord Yeah First of all before we start this podcast

Can we stop Can we stop please Let's read the name Skip Skip Skip Skip Cats

Scrat What did you ask us to do the fewer scap Skip a da-a-da-win Can we skip it about poppani this? All right Do you let your do to fall Reserva-b-b-b-b-b-gating

Getting a Chinese robot bitch And will jam my hardware Into-Sovary into her software Hassan canonically bang Yasmin Gould To create anti-Semitic roaches Oh, hell this god, overlord God's hottest femboy

Fucking straight men We need adjuster copy cats now I didn't say it Will Graham Pissing in Hannibal's mouth And giving him a piss kink I'm calling it. Hock Toa is making an only fans. I don't know.

Death. Jack the World's fastest Maori. She's bigger tits. I think, well, she's probably going to jail. Who? Yeah, that's true. The Hock Tua. I was saying, if she wants to, like, make money, she needs to, like, get all that fake shit, though.

She should have just voiced a cartoon squirrel or something. Yeah. Like, I don't even know, like what she's like. That actually would have been brilliant. Yeah, she sounds like a fucking road. She sounds like Chippendale. Yeah, the next Disney Pixar thing. Well, it's me.

I'm stupid. It's me. It's me. It's me. It's skippity. And everyone's getting now. I saw a crazy take that's not. I made me really upset.

That's crazy. Neither you guys watched Avatar. That doesn't matter. Yeah. Which one? Avatar last Airbender. I watched it. Oh,

he did. Yeah, he did. It's a good show. I know enough about it. I have essentially watched it. I just know there's Ang. Is it on? Yeah, it's on.

Well, I guess that's, canonically, I mean, it would technically actually be pronounced as on, right? Yeah, but people call them Eng. Yeah. Gotcha. Because we're white. Cora. Yeah, exactly.

Korah. Aang. Those are the avatatatars. nigga with the burn on his face. Zuko. Zuko? And there was the guy that people said I was when I had my hair pulled back. I had my hair pulled back.

Oh, were you the old guy? No. Iro? One of the kids. Oh, Saka? Yeah. I think it's that one. Saka?

Yeah. I had my hair in the pandemic because I was losing my mind. Oh, good. And I had like one of those like, it was like a little warrior wolf buns. It was like a little that and then a. Yeah. And then they were saying, you're that guy. And I'm like, all right.

You know crazy? dumb. That was crazy. You know what's crazy? I can never actually shave my head because during the pandemic, I went crazy to and carved an Aramaic poem in my head. You carved an angel,

a fucking biblical speak poem in your fucking head? It was stressful. I think you should definitely shave your head so we can see it. Yeah. I want to see the scabs and scars on your fucking head. Yeah, it's the lyrics to Skatman in Aramaic. In Aramaic. That is so stupid.

That is so much stupider than. then we have the time to discuss. That's amazing. Jack the World's fastest, Bowery, Theory, Nouvelle, World Champion. Ah, uh, cry laughing at buzzin by Swayzy, sung by the Sims.

Oh my God, I forgot about that song. Dude, first of all, Simless is hilarious. What's that? Simlish. It's like the language of the Sims speak. Oh, right, right, right.

They would have, like, for some of the games, they would have, like, popular songs remix and Simlish. The only reason I know about that is because, like, they had, I think Savior by Res Against was one of them.

And it was in Sims 3 or something And I was like, what the fuck? And they actually got the guy to do it, I think. I don't think it's like a vocal remix. I think they actually like, can you sing these stupid fucking gibberish words? It sounds ridiculous. It sounds like scatting. Interesting.

Yeah, because I know what they sound like, wow. This dude has unlocked a memory for me. I forgot about Shwayzee. Yeah, he's dead. Well, it was these two people. Yeah. About this black dude and this white guy. Shway and Zay.

I met her at a back something, some block party by the bar. and she kept looking at me like she knew who I was. You remember that? She was buzzing all over me. Oh yeah, buzzed all over me. I completely forgot about that. That's our old ass fucking song. She only fell in love.

Bang, bang, baby, hit me one time. Yeah, damn, I completely forgot about that. Sounds like shit to me. It's not bad. Sounds like fucking garbage. That police drawing is Brere Sweeney from Song of the South. It's not bad. Big meaty stinks. Kid Flash is an adult and is still referenced as to as Kid Flash.

Andy the man who's handy is in our back to S-tier and Forever Dan Fat Albert's two inch penis That's the nub Damn, that sucks It is veined up to the max But it's a fucking low Low low low It's seven inches wide

But that's it How it It's like a fucking oval Dude that's crazy It's like this It's like a wheel of cheese It's like And then chicks just like

Licking it or something Like what else can you do? You just have to You have to like Except to pretend that it is real. Yeah, just, uh,

uh, keep going. Hey, hey, hey, Hey, I'm coming. Oh my God.

He's fucking buckets, too. If you don't do that he comes all the weight of his body. He's actually a same person. The black of the penis is sweet of the Jews. Heath Smoker going off is going,

he's smoker going is off to Vegas. The endgame currency in call duty is called CP. Gids talk to a girl has insane Ethan Ralph energy And I wouldn't be surprised if she's related to him Ethan Ralph energy I think I kind of know what they mean It's like there is like a train wrecked redneck Like low cow potential

Maybe yeah I mean the moves that she's making So are pretty stupid So like Ethan Ralph is Oh beautiful this story The saga continues Oh yeah I haven't caught up in there all He's gonna have to go to jail again Most likely

He actually might I think he's taken a plea deal Because he was he got Contempting court Minnesota. He went up there to film another locale. Damn, Tim Walls got him. Yeah, Tim Walls got, they literally lassoed him.

This guy's weird. This is a really fucking... This guy's strange. Kill him. Actually, when I called all those guys weird on the campaign trial, I was really talking about this guy specific. I had Ethan Ralph in mind. If he said that, how the fuck does he know about any...

There's no way he should know. He shouldn't know any of these people. The vice president should not know who Ethan Robbins. No. No. No. No. I feel like it's actually

disqualifying in some way. And if you find out while your vice president, you must resign. Yeah. You must. No, I fully support that in every way, shape, or form.

Sweene come back as Mario Judo already. Hyperball. Sweeney L. Jackson's thick, juicy, purple lightsaber. Chris, there is a turnless RTS mod for BG3. A real-time strategy?

Wait, say it again? Say it again? One more time? Turnless RTS mod for real time I don't really... Oh so basically it's like it becomes an RTS So it's like It's probably gonna be a little chaotic

Like an RTS but I actually sounds a little fun Listen I have to say I it's not necessarily I don't I don't hate the dice roll I just I don't like losing as much health as I do In the early games you're squishy man Yeah you're it's but it's so squishy to the point where it's like I don't I don't even feel I don't even understand That's how D and D is man

I just don't understand a reasonable way for me to continue. I guess mods would be the way to like just to make yourself. Like say there's some games where, oh, I wanted to play through Final Fantasy 15, but there's no way I was going to grind. Right. So, but I kind of, I'm, I abandoned the game eventually because it just, I just don't, it's too much. It's just too much. I just don't have time for it. But like I was, I was completely planning on being able to, because I wanted to experience the thing.

And so I'm not going to grind. There's some really cool moments in that game, though. I think the moment, like, when it turns nighttime. Amy, the Dragoon girl. She saw somebody's fucking blights a monster in front of you. Like, you know, that monster was alive a few seconds ago, and now it's way dead. I whipped a monster's ass that I clearly wasn't supposed to because I fucking, like, I... Just wouldn't stop fighting it.

I maxed my shit out. I got some better shit because I was just like, oh, I... So I went out at night and then that giant fucking, like, minotard... Yeah, he came out and I whipped. his ass hard. The dude was like, one of my homies was like, oh, we should retreat. I was like, the hell we are. Fucked him up so bad.

It was funny. Oh, man. I want to play that game again, but also I don't think I'd like it. Game and Cream, are you listening in the drain? Come a glistening. What's that? I is twitching. I feel a sickness. Twitch, Twitch, Twitch, Twitch, Twitch, Twitche, Twitche.

I is twitching. And rap, dance, dance, that. That was actually a cover of scatman. That's crazy. There's a scatman. You didn't know. Bebap, boop. I can't scat like you.

You're doing it in reverse, I think. But yes. Kevin Durant's feet. Dr. Man lover, how I learned how I learned how to stop wearing and love the cock. Fuck you. I ain't paying my TV license, bitch.

That's my left eye. Skatman. Twit Mr. Pants I want to see Benchapiro Gang Raid by gay clowns Fuck Face Unstoppable Cardboard Pie

Longtime listener First Time asked Longtime question ask Her first time listener Putting my whole Dick and balls In between Chunley's thighs And telling you to squeeze

Until I hear a pop Jolly old dipshit Bill Cosby singing baby It's cold outside Bill Coffield Oh I mean I guess that yeah I guess that works

That would be You really too bad Stay I'm going nowhere It's cold out That was like Josh Balta. Yeah, I totally fucked up. That was a horrible.

You can't get the way. You can't get the way. What are you doing? Rudy, what's going on? So, I won't die. He sounds nothing like that, by the way. George Volter sounds nothing like the impersonation of John Belcher.

When he's doing at all. Is it, here's the thing about, here's the thing. It's not even the character. It's literally just him in Greece. Yeah. Yeah. That is him in Greece and that's it. Oh, my God.

Isn't he like a high-ranked Scientologist? Isn't he like one of the hyper-ranked ones? Yeah, he's one of the big. Yeah, for sure. He's the ones that make people go missing, right? Yeah, the highest one is, no, I think that's Tom Cruise. Yeah, Tom Cruise is like, he's like a priest over there. Yeah.

It's crazy. He's very powerful. It's crazy how fucking old and gross he looks and he's still doing one last mission impossible. He is very. Oh, shit. Oh, jeez. Oh, man.

My colon fell out again. Oh, my God. See what I'm saying? I'm not doing one out of this problem. I'm not doing one out of this problem, Skip. Please, let's finish. I need colon medication. Oh, Sandy.

My colon's falling out again. Oh, shit. I'm leaving you. I'm leaving. I can't be with a man with no cold. It's so banana It's my deal breakers That's my deal breaker

Oh fuck Saggy pussy lips I'm deadful This is the craziest fucking credits we've had in a while Gears Gears of Leno Oh that's hot You can see that

That's hot What is it? You see this fucking worm over there? You see this worm over there? You see this fucking worm over there? You see this fucking worm on there? They're singing cities. Singing cities.

They're singing the city with a giant worm. Is that the most classic line from that fucking series? That is the most... Dom! That's the most classic line. Well, yeah, Mark is screaming Dom is there also. But I do think they're singing the city with a giant worm. It's just such a crazy...

It's like Madam Webb. You know that line from the Madam Web trailer that was going around? I don't remember. my parents they were studying spiders in the Amazon and then they died I can't remember it was like something like that there was like this weird copy posse where it was just like that's so clunky

and such an obvious like dumb way to tie this to the spider bed but like it's like it's not that it's a dumb line it's just funny because he's so, Marcus is panicked in that moment they're sinking the city with a giant worm giant worms specifically I almost feel like it's like is that where wait which one came first? The Alaskan bull worm

or obviously the Alaskan Boerborm, that's not even worth talking about Are you sure? It was like season two, right? Derek, shut the fuck up. Just read that I'm so done doing this episode. You don't know. It's an Alaskan Bullwark.

It's an Alaskan Bullwark. Oh my God. There's so many jokes converging and it's giving me a headache. There's so many different lines of joke. I can't do this anymore. You see this? Look at my colon.

Look at my colon. I can skip roll with it. It's kind of crazy. Look at this. He drags out of bull, rips its colon out he grabs it out he grabs it

by the scruff of it to bull neck and drags it out it's fighting he open he he runs up to a bull's open

anus clasps it and pulls the colon my golden what the fuck is going on yard dweller

she fantive Rosewood 2 on my divine swendl till I chaos defeating Rabbit Sweeney with a fire hose of come melting him like Roger Rabbit's dip Uh Chautu's wife isn't canon and is a doll At the door I can't escape it

I'm probably an F Smitchie the kid she pips got on my pippa Getting my brains blown out for shareholder value Sweeney flosses with his own piss I'm just here so I don't get killed Um And finishing it off as always King of Hepazard's Star Coffee

Um I'm white but my dad left after going to prison twice. Can I say it? Chris was right. American dad is pretty funny. Right is not as annoying as you said. IMO. Transfum Gremlin. Yush. Sween is just Derek in his Zarbond monster form. Facts. Chris stared listlessly at the patron list. Time to plaster a fake smile and plow through this shit one more time, he thought. I love how Alan Wake that is.

Chris stared listlessly at the patron list. Craig the Canadian. I'm Jimmy Olson. Oh yeah, I forgot to say that. I voiced in one of those fucking solid JJ DC superhero videos. You can go check that out. Solid JJ, if you Google it, you'll find it.

I think it's like Superman gets cheated on, I think is what the name is. I play Jimmy Olson. You're a Jimmy Olson? I'm Jimmy Olson. You're like, hey, it's me, Jimmy Olson. I lost my colon. Shut up! Oh my God.

It's your voice, Johnny. Yeah, go check that. Solid J.J. is awesome. He's great. Go check out my colon. Go check out my colon. It's wet. It's your boy.

Shawnee Dee, rest in peace, Jeff the shark, who got fist pummel to death in Brooklyn. That's true. I didn't know that wasn't even a real character. He's a new one. Serberus agent 627. Gay bon jovie be like,

I'm a gay boy on a fat cock I ride. Nice. It's pretty good. I like that. All right. All right. On a fat cock I ride. It's good.

I hate that song, but this is good. Tip for broke asses. Enter picture mode for iOS YouTube. Lock screen, then hit play on your earbud. The video will play. Ah, lock screen. Okay. That's so funny.

That's fire. I love that. Enter picture mode for iOS YouTube. That's so wild. Yeah, YouTube premium's fucking expensive unless you have a family one. It is, yeah. I do. It's the only one that means.

It's expensive. It's like 20 something. Yeah. You do a fan. I feel like I don't pay 20 for mine. Because if you do, if you do a same thing. single. It's like fucking like 13 or $14. So you might as well do a family and just split that shit or whatever.

Like like say or I'm just saying like if you, it's like Spotify. Doing a duo or something or family much cheaper than doing a single. The thing for me is like I've canceled real streaming services. I've like I canceled Hulu. I canceled HBO. I'm not canceled. Like YouTube is like the one that like it's probably like the last on the chopping block. I use it so frequently. I use it so frequently.

It's so reliable. Same. I just feel it's weird thing. I don't use the music service, though. I don't use it either. I like there being a separation of things. I think this is like where we come from too. Like we're older.

So like we're used to like things having like even just devices. Like this is my iPod. It plays music. This is my, you know, computer. It does computer things. Yeah, yeah, yeah. This is my video game console. It plays video games, maybe watches DVDs.

Now that everything's kind of the same kind of bleeds together. Yeah. But like I like that YouTube is where I go to find videos. And I like Spotify is where I go to find music. But that's probably like an old sentiment. I'm sure a lot of people don't care. Although there's video on Spotify now, and that was really fucking weird. Yeah, it's getting pretty wild.

Where I was like, oh, how's that going to work? Yeah. People were asking, like, why don't you do it for the Stark Times? Like, I don't know how that works. I mean, you suck my peepee. I do that, too. Just go on YouTube. Like, I don't know.

Like, I feel like Spotify is so clearly not a video service, but that we might just be old. Yeah. I don't even know. I feel like you need, like, special privileges to do it. I think you can do it. Like, already? I don't know. I don't know.

I don't handle that end of the show. I don't even, I don't know how that even works. I haven't seen an RSS thing to do it. I haven't seen like, like an option saying, hey, you can now, maybe it's there and I've just ignored it. It might be there and it's probably like, dude, the back ends of those sites are really fucking, you know. Whatever. Whatever. Go to YouTube. Yeah, I'll fit. Yeah, I'd rather it just be on one. I don't know. If it becomes so easy that like, you know, I'll figure it out. But yeah. If there's an intense demand and it's easy. We'll do it.

Yeah. Like, I just don't see it. Right. You'll let us know. Getting jerked off to completion by an arcade claw machine, I paid $500 and was not worth it. 3XO realizing if Sweeney was a white woman, he would be Keisha Gray. I don't know who that is. I've heard that name, but I don't.

That's a porn star. Oh, is that a porn star. Is she dumb? I'm thinking she got beat like really bad by her husband who was a porn star as well. Oh, that tracks. That's, I see the parallels. Yeah, yeah. You're beating up by your husband.

Who's also a podcast? Slurp and smoking, joking Um, Moticon's going like this Uh, Goku and Chi Chi both speak With Hic dialects in Japanese Hence being dubbed with Southern accents Oh, I see That's interesting

They are hicks They are meant to be like, Yeah, backwards ass I guess that makes sense That's gross though And I would hate Like a Kentucky Goku You know?

Like that's disgusting Yeah, hey y'all I mean I'm going super sion Okay Ow, my colon. Ow, my, Not again, Chi-Chi.

Stop with the colon stuff, guys. Cheech, can he help me put my colon back in? Oh, shit, Goku. I don't know. I never done handle the colon before. Long's like my family's, my parents, idiots. Yeah. Oh, my fucking, why are my, why is their colons always falling out?

Man, come punch me in the head again. It's the only time I feel alive. He's just where Pickle, Picolus, like, I love you, Go on. Remember that? You're a good kid. Go on, you're good. Help me with my colon real quick, though. Pickle doesn't have a colon probably. He can't.

He can't. He's like, he can't. He's like, he literally doesn't eat. This is into the colon verse. There's just so many colon's falling out in so many different universes. Into the colon verse is crazy. You Doc's. Gayman in Iran, you built Kaczynski's bomb, Mr. Grinch.

Obi won't you blow me. Waiting for the sweet hunting tier, I want his pelt. Kremlin to Grimelman, 50 cent to 50 cent blood in my piss. Drinking squirrel girls thigh sweat. They made her, they gave her a lot of body. Thigh sweat. Damn. I don't want to drink sweat.

I'm sorry. I'm not that horny. I'm pretty, uh, no, I'm not horny anymore. I wouldn't drink sweat. Even in my prime, I don't want to drink sweat. In my horniest, I was definitely, doofness. In my most ravenous, I would not be drinking sweat. I would say the most I do is.

like say ever like uh in high school or we were like all at school all day we had PE and all this stuff so if you like hooked up after that like you was a glistening coat of like sweating because you have not showered so like at that point like even like say if you were there's a little that was like my maximum in my school there was a kid there was a kid who would always get you get beat up in the locker room you beat up so bad that his colon would fall out And they would ring his colon. It would ring his colon. They would drink all the stuff that would ring out of his colon.

I almost pivoted to colon. And I was like, no, don't do it, Derek. I want you guys to really envision this all that. Because this is different. Imagine getting beaten so bad that your colon fell out. You know what's fucked up? I'm sure in the Midwest somewhere. In a bum-fuck Kentucky town, that has happened.

That has absolutely happened on the border, on the Mississippi. border that has happened. They beat him up and they started sucking on his colon like a fucking... Like a chitlin, dude. We're in the middle, we're on the borderline. We're in between, you know, fucking Mississippi and whatever the other state is. We're savages. Get him, Skeeter.

Get him, Skeeter. Law does not apply to us. On the border, we are borderlanders. And we are borderlanders. We are sovereign. We are here to suck on your colon. We are calling. We are calling. It is gray. You dried up.

I want you. I want you. You're calling going to look like E.T.'s neck when we're dumb. Honey, be careful. Do not go through that border because the colon raiders might get you. What do you mean to call in? Oh, Darla. That's not real.

That's not real. That's not real. You're listening to old wives tales like the dumb stupid whore bitch you are. Let's go on an adventure. Skip. And his dog's like, I'm not going. They're going to steal my colon.

You're going to steal my colon. I don't think I have a good idea, master. Mark. I really enjoys my colon. So you's going to have to go there by your slonesome while I stays here and fuck your wife. It grabs the cold.

It's Marvel Rival's Wolverine growls. Rows! They're bursting out of the ground. They bury themselves. They get a fucking fork and spaghetti your colon on it. They don't. They're digging out of the ground. his asshole fucking raw

yank it happens and he goes in he goes in with no resistance he just goes in slow oh it's like that's way too sensual dude you gotta be in and out it's like it's cold though

Mr. Beast blinding kids Lee Harvey Oswald right before shooting yelling if they set what these are great today what is this Lee Harvey Oswald right before the shooting, right before the shooting, yelling,

If they set that Kennedy free, it'll be the end of all of us. No. I saw Daddy sucking Santa under the mistletoe. I saw Daddy sucking Santa under the mistletoe. Big Daddy, hey, big daddy, Derek, update us on Ethan Ralph. Oh, I did a little bit. A little bit. Yeah, he's, he's, contempt of court.

He pleaded guilty. I guess if he fucks up one more time, he'll go to prison. Maxim Security Ralph's Securement Center. He's drawn only by Portuguese people that are going to be. They sent it to a Portuguese prison. That would be so funny. His natural, natural predator of Ethan Ralph,

the Portuguese man. I love it. I love that he's been beaten up multiple times. Amazing. By the same group. I love it's, he's my, I'm telling me he's the underdog.

It's like people are missing every, internet archive person, what do you call them? Internet arc, is that what I'm called? They're all missing this guy. I was like, what is wrong with you? It's like the JF people and the crew crime people. They're missing that gold. It's like layups.

It really is crazy to me that that situation is not true. It makes no fucking sense to me. Anyway. Hey Big Daddy Derek. Oh, okay, read that. Wage Slate 583. Pippini Brothers Report. J.D. Vance of Sexual Relations of Cherry from Peewee's Playhouse.

Don, Don, Dong, Dacherson, Oie, come back, come back, yeah. Be a good cut and come bounce on the cock and tobacco. Come back to me, Colin. Come back to me golden Beye O'i, the golins fell out Me, right?

My colonel felt O'M lander punched me in the stomach And now my colon's on the fucking ground I can't deal with these Colin jokes anymore What's wrong with your colon? There's a lifestyle now Something wrong with your colon

Something wrong with your colon? Is this a little too much PTSD That's better I don't know how to do that accent It's harder That's a harder I'm trying to think of also The way that he does these little

mannerisms? It's more in the inflection than in the accent, I think, actually. It's weird. Boy, you, go-y. Where if you're calling tight, you, you know, y'all. Oh, fuck. I'm writing off somebody that can have a-a-gade 6. Damn right, diabolical. Pee, Pee-P, I'm working on a submission for a t-shirt idea

when I'm done. Where can I send it so that you guys see it? Let me have a piece of your colon, store. That's a good question. Oh, wait, what? So, he says, Pee, I'm working on a submission for a t-shirt idea when I'm done. Where can I send it so you guys can see it? Ooh, snarktank team at Gmail.com. Yeah, snarktank team at gmail.com.

Yeah, that's where we're most likely to see, like, serious stuff. Oh, you. You could tag us, but like... Yeah, the tags are... But you would have to tag my alt account. You have to tag Gunray Chris specifically, because I don't get... My... Notifications.

DMs are open on Twitter. I see... I get very few, so I see them all. So that's if... That's another one, but the email should be fine. Kingston will see it. Absolutely, yeah. All right. This isn't meant to be mean, but I don't see the progress everyone's saying Sween has made. There's no shame in trying OZempic. Well, first of all, OZempic is insane. Isn't that like... It's money. Well, isn't Ozempic like... What? It's a dietary thing, but it's... Well, they're using... It's completely... It's... Ombic's a brand. It's not the thing. Yeah, it's... I forgot what the actual drugs called, because there's different versions of it now. But it is an acceptable off... label thing now.

Yeah. It is now, at first, the only argument before was that, hey, you're taking away from people that legitimately needed for the diabetic purposes. But now it's in abundance because of the demand. Yeah. And so now I, my only pushback is that

long term, it hasn't been that's it. There hasn't been long term. That's what I directly talked to a doctor about. They were like, no, there's no long term testing. It was like if, they were like, if you can lose weight, which I have lost weight without using drugs. Yeah. They would like do that.

See a way to do it anyway. Yeah. I don't think it's a way to do it. And there's nothing as much as it's a health thing, right? For different. But the thing is that like it's, there's nothing wrong with using it. You are correct.

There's nothing wrong with using it. If it's going to increase your quality of life, then do it. I just think that clearly something that is this fast working when it comes to because in the ideal world, that's what happens. You know, there is a drug you can just take that'll help you lose weight and be

healthier. That will help people live longer. That is the way to do it. There's no reason to be ashamed of taking drugs to help you live a better life. I've been on a Zempec for 10 years. Insane. I mean, I noticed.

Also, the people, the doctors were like, oh, there's no point. You've lost like 35 pounds. Like, there's no. Why would you use it?

Well, in the, in the, in the eyes of, media, you have not had this major transformation. Oh, like in,

in the short amount of time. Well, they're not going to go, like, 150 pounds or whatever. I'm not going to drop that many pounds that fast, you know? Also,

relatively a lot of people have this problem and I have to like you have to ground yourself and remember even when it comes to a couple of yeah a couple of years is a tiny fraction of your lifespan so the idea that you need to lose a significant amount of weight this quickly is stupid you can literally take five years and lose 10 pounds a year you know I'm just saying even though you've done more than that but like say it it's all going towards this goal to where you're healthier and it feels terrible I felt terrible I First, like, dieting is not bad anymore. I think that's like a really not a big problem.

It is how often you're used to doing stuff like whatever you're eating. Yeah. Like definitely, definitely it's hardest during right this period right now because obviously it's holiday time. Everybody's eating is this fucking shitty food, which sucks a huge amount. Plus people are like busy. So that's been tough. But like, I mean, hey, bud.

Safe where? Huh? Safeway. Let's go away. Let's go away. I'm glad you noticed. I appreciate you. I think Sepuas go away, right?

Defuas, like, get out, I think. Well, I think... Afoas go away. Yeah. Cepue is like... So what? It's like... There it goes.

That's how I've heard it used. In my family, that's kind of, like, the context clues kind of indicated that's what it did. Okay. There he goes. There goes. Cifway? Yeah. You good nigger.

I was watching a video on, on Twitter just now of, what is name? Bamargera. He was doing a weird trick on his home skateboard, which is insane because he's still skateboarding. He's mad fucking old now. Well, Tony Hawk still skateboards too. Yeah, it's crazy. But he fell down really hard and his coldest came out.

God damn it. Did you actually see it? I was like attentive. Like, uh-huh. Ew, at the skate park is so gross. Like down his bag. And it's how it rolls over it. Trailing.

And it's how it rolls over it. It's a fucking tire mark on his colon. Yo, that's going to run over so bad You're calling it's tire marks That's fucking next level To the tune of Hot to Go F-A-G-O-T-S gay guys Having gay hot sex

D-E-A-D-C-E-A-D-C-E-O John Strickland Merck's 1889 Sweeney tipping his weave fedora At Lilly saying My bitch I like my bitch is That's pretty good

Yeah The first certificate David Had to skip back to see if Derek really said Boners Gap 3 Oh probably Sounds like something you would say Oh yeah I did But I mean I think one of the episodes

Literally when we were talking about Baldur's Gabe That was The actual title I think it's literally bonner And the thumbnail And the thumbnail is censored Shadow Hearts giant tits Yeah

And then a fucking naked dwarf This is not proportionally similar at all Sweene flosses the gap in his teeth with Lily just grab her That's so disgusting Geistone what are you doing Ow My cold

This is the dumbest arc You're out of the show for a long time Can't wait for the next VG3 update The Funk Astariens title again And Helves Pagin tags Injoid pre-Raz I can definitely impregnate

Sweden's tooth cap You said Sweden. Sweden. I don't know if you did this on mobile and it auto-corrected. He probably did. Blake 896, Radiohead, nice peen. Do you think Brian Thompson's last words were, whoa.

Well, he's not a Mario. He's not Mario. He would be like, I guess he would just like kind of... Jesse, he needs to get some of his head. He would just kind of disappear and turn into like a small set of numbers real quick. Yeah, I guess so.

Because that's kind of how they die. Who's the they? All right. Them? Listen. The enemies in Mario. I'm not trying to... I'm not saying they with like...

With three parentheses. Dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun. Anyway. I like how the old like that sound effect when you would die. It's hurt. Yeah. Spider goon.

Alaskan oil field trash. Kazu here most of MGS 5 is filler Miller. Texas Teta salad. Young Sheldon getting lost in Sweden. Wait, what the fuck? Fuck, is that happening again? Oh, no, it's just the same. Okay, Young Sheldon getting lost in Sween's tooth gap.

Steve Urkel, viciously raping Johnny Five for science. We moved on from E.T. onto a robot. No. Johnny Five from Short Circuit. It's hot. It's not really, I don't think you could rape a robot. Watch Steve Urkel. Watch me work.

Watch me. Watch me. Yeah. Oh, is that a challenge? I will do that. Steve Urkel is fucking Black Sheldon, but he's not. I mean, he's not totally inaccurate. No, Steve Rekle's not autistic.

He's this weird. Yeah, he's just insane. He's just crazy. I mean, Steve Rorkel's clearly autistic. No, he's autistic. Watch that show again. Tell him he's not autism coded. Yeah, well.

I guess so. Well, Stefan isn't, though. This is ultra-ner. Stefan. Oh, yeah. Stefan, his alter autistic ego. He's the non-autistic. Yeah, he's not autistic.

because his alter ego is it. He gets in a machine. The very idea. He gets in a machine. He gets in a machine. The machine turns him into Stefan. Stefan is a dwelling of Steve. He's autistic.

You need to watch it again. Stefan actually. So no, Steve Orkel is not autistic. Stefan, he steps out of the machine and there's a train in his hand. And there's Sonic in his other hands. He's swab as fuck. But you see he has it. Listen, Stephen Urkel, the man.

Yeah, Stephen Urkel. Steve Urkel is a character, not autistic. Stefan is not autistic, but they are under the umbrella of an autistic man. They're trapped in the body of Stephen Urkel. This was before we... It is autism coded, but this was before we understood autism. Right, right. So it's like...

Name characters that are autistic that people don't think autistic. I think Solid Snake has to be autistic. Solid Snake? Has to be autistic? Specifically solid snake or like all of them all of that all of those things every single character except for maybe big boss so big boss is not so just all the clones yeah okay yeah I agree with that I think all the clones are like because they're fucked up they're all like they that came out wrong that is fucked up that is not what I meant but at the same time there was

but at the same time on a recent sacred I I mentioned autism speaks and I said that autism company. My accent. They're not autism company. They make autisms? Yeah, they make, yeah. I mean, they make vaccines. You're crazy.

You can just Nicky Ziggy? Nicky Ziggi. No, no. No. Oh, so. Paul Joseph Watson's hands here. We have consumed the body.

You can't wait for Sonic. You're next. Preheated toast. Have you seen any of the Sonics? The movies, yeah. I've seen the first one. I watched a knuckle show. Oh, okay. I saw the first one. Hi in theaters

I took a gummy And I went to see it And I don't remember anything I like Sonic a lot Was it in theaters I thought it came out during Like the Pandy Beginning right before

It was right before the lockdown It was the last movie That people could see Ah right right right yeah Because everyone was like man What an omen That like Sonic The Sonic movie came out

And the world shut down That's funny It is crazy That's funny Anyway Uh pre-hated toast Sorry Miss Jackson Badly Brave

Dog the Baby Hunter Oh that's amazing That's, I would watch the fuck out of that show. Hey! Taze is a baby. I said, you need Christ, brother. You need Christ. Go with Christ and he just puts this baby and...

Go with Christ. With the baby with no fucking seat just puts in the back of his fucking... Baby and comes on. Take it to the infant de-skinneding machine. Oh my God. Oh my goodness. Where did you get this? Why is this specifically a thing?

It's like Costco next to the fucking rohypnoal baby oil. It's right next to the fucking Costco guys. We're Costco guys. Of course we're de-skid babies. Of course he's skin baby. We're Kirkland brand machinery. Yulg Justin, Rizzler, D-Skin is baby. He's skin his baby.

Damn! It pulls it out the other end. This is actually one of the most... This feels like an insane episode. We're on one. A fever dream. Oh, my fucking God. All right.

He's fucking Doppler. He's Doppler affecting. Oh, my God. We got to... He's speeding by these people with a baby disclaim. Aetherian needs help lowering his weapon in Halo 3. Can't help you there. Sorry.

Orange Man Hunter Napram, Melfus One and rounding out our list as always. The king. The king of haphazard. Ain't he glorious? My nigger.

He's been consistent for many years. That's crazy. Yeah. What is that sound? Do you like Michael Winslow? What the fuck? It sounds like it really is crazy that he can do that.

I don't know that that's like a micro whistle thing. Not on purpose, I don't think. I can't whistle like that. I can't do it. I have no concept of always doing it. You have to close your lungs as much as you can't let all the air come out. Close your lungs. No, I can't do that.

That's crazy. I felt like I was going to throw up right now trying to do that. What do you close your lungs? You got to make your lungs taught. You got to suck your fingernails in a little bit. What the fuck do you mean? You got you retract everything on your body. Your hair streaks in you a little bit.

All right. You got to pull your colon a little bit up to the surface. Alright, let's get the fuck out of here. Ew. Ew, it comes out, it's like... It gets like a xenomorph? Bye, guys. So they got the idea from.

Bye, guys. This is fucking dark. You ever shoot your calling through your mouth like a genomorph? Jack.