The Snark Tank - #310: I'm Beetleling my Borg

Episode Date: March 26, 2025

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No, I actually, it's funny we're talking about migraines. Mides were feeling a little sensitive. Yeah. And so I was like, you know what? These are prescription sunglasses. Nice. And we have some lights,

especially one right over here that doesn't have any cover on it. So I was like, oh, this might be a problem for me today. Because like, mine's just feeling a little like, you ever, do you ever? I don't know if you ever have that feeling we're like, oh, like, a miser little extra sensitive and they were going to be I sit at the sun when I have that happens

I'm like all right here we go Oh is that like Right at the sun Is that like what you do When you're like Oh man to avoid a hangover You just keep drinking Yeah yeah yeah

Yeah it's amazing You just go whenever I'm like in pain I'm like all right cool And I open my stomach a little bit And I'm like all right jackpot I like that a lot And I go through all my day If you're always drunk

You can never be hungover It's fantastic I had a guy That literally followed that mantra And he, this is when I had my first apartment in 2007, a piece of shit. This guy's a terrible person. My friend invited him over. And he was like, he said, yeah, you can't get hung over if you're always drunk.

It's fucking like 10 in the morning or something. And then he passes out taking a shit in my bathroom. That's fucking crazy. My friend, like, uh. Passing out in the bathroom like that is, is, uh, that's a dire. That's like a reassessing your life. kind of situation. I hope he got better after that,

but he's probably dead. I've never passed out in a bathroom thing. I definitely have. I almost, I've just been tired to why. You pass out in bathroom is not even drunk. I was fucking narcolectic free. I have passed.

I've passed out in the bathroom at least twice in my life. Like doing why? Like once, like I told you guys a story about when I tried to fuck the girl and I threw up all over myself and passed on a toilet. Not a toilet in the fucking tub. The tub. I was passed on the tub covered and vomit.

That's crazy. Fuck. And then there was, you're gonna drown. I didn't, I wasn't puking enough that I was like a sign of the top. And I'm just, And I'm just,

While I'm still vomiting. My nose is trying to. Some reason, just won't even lift yourself up. I can't. I can't. I'm too weak. You know when you vomit,

you're weak? Yeah, okay. You have your weakest version. Your fucking corzalks and stuff. You ain't got nothing left going. That's true. Vomiting is terrible.

It is. I wish I was, when I remember vomiting as a kid where I was just a pro at it. Also, welcome to the Star Tank podcast. It's me, Chris, it's him, Kingsman. It's you, Derek. Let me continue.

Yeah. I don't, I hate forgetting. Yeah, but I mean, you got it. That was good. Yeah, yeah, we got it. Yeah, we got it. We caught it. What was I, vomiting as a kid?

Oh, yeah, I just remember vomiting as a kid. Like, it was easy. I remember like, oh, I remember one time eating way too much spaghetti. You're like, well, I was like, well, here we go. And then just, you know, like, oh, dude, it was so much more hellish for me as a child than it is for me now. For me right now, I can, I can make, I used to be able to make myself vomit. I might be able to do it still, probably not. I used to be able to tense my stomach and vomit,

but also that was back when I had nearly abs. And now it's like, that's it. It's a long, long, far-fetched. Far, long, far-fetched time ago. I'm envious because I, as an adult, it's the, I think I would rather be punched in the face repeatedly. You got vomiting? Yeah.

Vomining feels really bad as an adult. Yeah, being punched in the face repeated, like, really isn't that bad. It's not that bad, especially when adrenaline kicks in after a couple punches. It's a numbing. numbing hurt if that makes any sense. Well, the thing about it is that like, I'll take a, I'll take a million punches to the face over here.

Oh, now you know how to get punched. Understood. You know, you're hit here, dude. Your diaphragm is crazy. Like, right here is crazy work. It's like, it's like that, it feels like, you know, that little hole? And that, then random applines

that just press and turned off. Yeah, that little hole in like, there's like iPhone. There's a little button. You gotta open it to get your SIM card out. Yeah, it feels like a factory reset. Like your, like your, your breath's, your breath is out of sync with your heart

which is out of sync with your liver out of sync with your stomach you're just dying that little piece man it feels it feels so like your solar reflexes have you ever had you your solar reflex yeah have you ever yes I did combat sports for a little bit I don't know well here's the thing

so I don't know if it's all so I don't take muscle relaxers because of this one specific I fucked on my back one time and so they gave me metacarbon or something you were high as fuck well that was the problem was my diaphragm just would not stay attached and relaxed too because diaphragm's muscle right it controls your breathing yeah but like doesn't so so i don't know this was just me being allergic to that specific i just don't trust any because it was the worst it was one of the worst experience of my life

i had i was talking this girl at a time were you constantly having to breathe no i i was hiccuping because you know when your diaphragm's all fuck you just hiccup i had violent hiccups to where i thought i was going to have to go to hospital dude it my head i was almost like The girl, I was talking to a girl, she was laughing at me because I was like, dude, I can't take it anymore. This is the, I felt like I was being tortured. And it was such a bad experience that I've had, same back issues. I've been prescribed other muscle relaxers different than that one. I was like, I'm not taking this.

I would just give it to somebody else. I'm like, hey, you want some muscle relaxers? You want to get funny? You want to get funny? You want to get silly? Yeah, you want to get a little silly right now. Get silly and drive a car real quick. Go get goofy and drive a flyer plane.

I'm scared. Like, it might have been just me being allergic to that specific one, but I'm never going to chance it. Because that, it was, I can't properly describe how bad it was. Yeah. Like, at a certain point, you might as well have been just full-blown hitting me in the temple really hard because my head was hurting so much from violently hiccuping. Dude, it's, I- That's crazy. When I first, when I first did it, like, MMA for the bit of time I did it. I remember we had like, because you don't spar initially.

You spar like months and months later after. Yeah, it's a way later than that. So I did when I first did my first did my same. sparring. My coach's they are going to get hit and you got to get used to not being scared of getting hit. Like you're going to get hit. It's going to happen. You got to be used to getting hit and being able to move it off. Your brain is designed. Well, your brain's designed to avoid getting hit for obvious reasons. Right. But your face is like, your face is strong. Obviously your chin and your temple don't get hit there. Those are the altering buttons.

But you can get hit in your cheek and stuff like that are like around your eye and you won't be debility. It will swell up so it'll look bad. But you can deal with it. Opposed to getting hit like in your kidney I got shit in the kidney And I almost peed myself in public, dude I was on the man And I nearly peed I nearly peed

I was trying to like prove a point That was crazy That was before he got hit in the kidney Exactly He was in the middle of peeing himself in public And then he got to go pee And then someone kicks around Did I got hit

And I got hit and I was like Oh my God I had to like fall down and like Clinch everything Because I was like I'm gonna pee myself Imagine somebody peeing themselves in public And then somebody kidney shots them and then the stain becomes red.

Oh, shit. But he's still, though. He's still, yeah. He's good. He's like a monk. Yeah. He's like that guy on the cover of that Rage Against the Machine album. Yeah, yeah. He's all fucking, yeah, self-immolated.

Those motherfuckers are crazy. So, self-immolators? Yeah. How much drugs were they on, like, for real? Let's be real. Self-immilators? Yes. Let's be real.

Immilators? Emulators? I don't think anyone's ever used that term in that sense. Emolator? The imulators. emulates, self-emilates. Yeah, I think, yeah. Emolation.

The emulators is kind of a cool man name. It is kind of dope. The set her on firesers. Hello, London. We are the emulators. Oh! Every single week, there's a disaster. He's trying to be Johnny.

He's trying to aim the fire at somebody. People keep booking you, though. They keep booking you. By the end of it, he looks insane. Like, he has the greatest skin ever. Like, his skin is able to grow back. He's actually special. He actually, he's been burned so many times that he, like, the horse, like, you know what I mean?

The horseshoe goes all the way around to him just looking soft and perfect. Really immaculate skin. He's a little red, a little bit. But like, his skin is wrinkle. Like, there's no wrinkles in his skin at all. Because they've all been ironed out. What happens if you keep burning the first three layers of your skin off over and over and over again? You just never go lower than that, like the ones that come back.

You discover the fountain of youth. Yeah. You're so smooth. You can't be detained so much as a grabbing you. It's kind of what Nair does. Is that what nair does? That shit does burn, don't it? I've nared my balls before and it was a bad idea.

Why? Okay. The throw the fight. For the throw? Okay. The throw the fight did in my balls. First of all, no, you didn't.

I swear to God. I don't believe you did that. You won't even shave your head. That's true. You nared your balls? Yeah, because you know what? Being 17 is a different experience of being 31. I don't, maybe.

Maybe. You're just weaker, really. Yeah. it's not as I'm not capable to bounce back as fast. Yeah, yeah. That's true. I do feel weaker in every aspect. Every single one. I feel like my light is not as bright, but I've never had a light again. I could make it bright again.

It would just take like four years of me to really trying to make myself good again. I've known you for long enough to have known you when you would have perceivably had a light and there was no light there. It was like, that wasn't always a demon. It was just, it was always like out of focus shadows. Out of focus shadows. I was not.

You couldn't even really do it. You couldn't even really do it. You couldn't even really do like a like a puppet show with him. There would be like ill-defined lines. You wouldn't really know exactly. You wouldn't know where the shadow. You wouldn't know where the all the shadow begins or part of the shadow begins. Yeah, like is that a dog or is it Alan Alda? Spring weather is unpredictable.

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You shouldn't. Visit Detect thesos.com today to learn more. Okay. That's impressive at that moment, though. That's a very interesting spectrum. Speculation. Yeah. Because I think younger me, I was just, I was definitely crazier, but I think now I'm just like, ah.

But I think it's just because you don't have the energy to do it. Yeah. I don't think so. You're still that way in your brain. You are that way. That's true. I think because even old people are like, ah, they realize the limitations of their bodies. And they'll say like, if I was 40 years younger, I'd beat the piss out of you, like shit like shit. Remember when dude was talking shit to Mayweather? Oh my God. Yeah. Because he knocked out Ortiz when he, uh, because he had Ortiz butted Mayweather. And he doinked them. And then he was like, my bad came up with his hands down. And then he fucking Mayweather knocks him out. And everybody was like, that's cheap shots and protect yourself at all times. even though I do agree that was unsportsmanlike But at the same time It started it

It was legal It is a legal thing to do It protect yourself at all times It wasn't like the break was old It was it was you're ready to fight It's like say a cheap shot When people are about to touch gloves Yeah yeah

You can actually knock them out It's cheap It's unsportsman like But it is legal So it's not that I liked it But I also am like He can do it So anyways dude old dude was like

If I was fucking Whatever year's under I kick your out In the ring giving an interview Yeah He was like Shut the fuck up old man. If I was 14, I'd bring a gun to school and kill you.

It's freaky. Like, you guys see people that are like elderly, older people that are in really good shape. Obviously, roids. Of course. Obviously, Roy's. Oh, sure. Some of them that are just like healthy. Yeah, I was overweight and I just like, yeah, I was overweight and I just like lost a bunch of weight and started eating well.

And I'm just like fine. They're not like fucking fucking. They don't look like. I'm completely natural. You fucking bitch. I got this from cabbage. Hot water. He's so fucking.

Wow, that's amazing. RFK, I'm Joe Rogan. Oh, what's going on? I love the impression. Any impression that precedes or follows with like, I am the person. Yeah. Wow, intriguing. Hello, I'm Donald Trump.

He, like, ruins it. I'm Donovan. It's amazing how little it sounds like the person when you say those words. It makes sense. It's a impression. No one's ever said that. No one ever said hi, I'm like, you know. This person.

Why they're just speaking? When you introduce yourself, how do you do it? Well, I mean, in that sense, I guess. Like in general, how do you introduce stuff? I guess it depends. I usually, I feel like I usually say, hey, what's up? And then I leave. And then you just leave.

I have to do myself forever. Yeah, yeah. I never show up again. When I do stuff to white people, I don't go, I don't approach them. I don't approach them. I'm like, hello, I'm Kingston. I'm Kingston. How are you?

doing sir it's in lovely days and it don't you're going on I'm Kingston yeah how you doing I'm also Hispanic don't get too scared

I'm half decent I'm Kingston hello that's great oh that's great dandy I'm Kigston

you guys are roasting me so hard right now when I'm just trying to That's what you sound like That's not how I sound That is how you sound

It's me I have one of those gross Like boastful voices Look at this video Of a pedophile Did you see the video I said to you guys You said you had the guy

zooming off the ring on Tusson's neck I did see that I didn't watch I didn't want to see anything like that It was Yeah because you're normal Backyard wrestling is crazy

And I'm ashamed that I stopped watching it It's absolutely I don't like it Because it's how fucked up it is For a pizza All that shit for a pizza And a gram of Coke there's this

there's this like fucked up exactly it probably wasn't even coke I'm sure it was crack yeah I'm sure it was crap

straight up he just rocked it and sold it out oh god yeah it's just just carrying around

a fucking little bendal of anthrax yeah that's crazy he'll go kill that guy in the ring yeah that's crazy

backyard wrestling I actually wouldn't put that past them actually have anthrax I love backyard wrestling, but I understand. What even is?

Is it literally just like, is it literally just backguard wrestling without any of the regulation? Yeah. And it's just, freestyle wrestling. Redneck's doing like the worst stunts and absolutely maiming themselves with no health care. Some guy landed on a dude's neck with

his foot. He put his head on a chair, went on a turnbuckle, and jumped on his neck. I saw a guy. And I was like, I saw a guy going to crane and drop a tractor on somebody else.

What? I showed Lily and Lily was like, She's like, I can't sleep. Why would you show me that? I can't sleep now. And I'm just like giggly. She's like, honey. Yeah, because this is what I'm saying.

This is you still. Yeah. No, I'm not the same anymore. I picture like sometimes I'm more sensible. I'm more sensible. I'm more sensible. I am more sensible than I was when I was younger. I care more about others.

No, you don't. Yes, I do. You specifically care less. I've always cared about others. The thing right now is that I can. Okay. Now we're in fantasy world. We're in Lord of the Rings.

Where's, where's fucking Tom Bombadil to fucking recite that. story. I'm a carer. I care. I just morbid violence is like my response to calm myself down. I'm like, someone else's having a worst day to me at least. What? Do you hear that? I don't think you said that sentence, right?

I'm going to give you the chance of re-say that. It's like, oh, let me just rebalance myself with watching someone nearly die, because at least I know I'm not nearly dead yet. You sound like my friend who said that if it wasn't for music, like, you know, being in bands and jamming, he'd be a serial murderer. I'm not there because I'm not hurting people. Well, so you're not there because you have this comedy outlet. No.

Well, it helps. But like, I don't, I'm not a violent person. If you never met Chris, you'd probably be a violent murder. I'm not violent. You'd be our guy. What about what he's trying to say is that I saved his life. You did. Am I?

You did. What about me is violent? I have. Name a violent tendency I have. Huh? I'm not violent. I'm generally not a violent person. You recoil when you're just simply touched.

I don't like being touched, but that's not. violent. It is kind of. You want to, you want to harm somebody when they touch you. I would rather someone not touch me and if they proceed to touch me, I'd be like, hey, can you stop? So if I kissed you, what happened? If you kissed me, I'd be like, hey, really don't do that again. And if you

kiss me, I would try to fuck you. And I'd be like, hey, I warned you. I gave you for a fair warning. So you don't like be touched because you know you would violently rape someone. This is not helping his case. You kissed me.

I'd be like, hey, don't do that again. Don't do that again. I'm getting very horny. Stop. I'm very serious. We're going to call this. We're going to call this. Hey, don't do that again.

This is the trial of Kingsett. The trial of Kings is right. We didn't get to the bottom of this of your, you're, why. So you will, you are, we kind of already got to the bottom of it, actually. Yeah, it's over. Yeah. Just calling me a rapist flat out. That's the shit.

No one could. You, it's, you, it's, you, you brought that. to the table really. You said exactly if I kissed you twice. You said I will fuck you if you kiss me again. I kissed you and you're like hey don't do that again. I kiss you again and then you turn me around and fuck me violently because well you had it violently. Well it'd be passionate it would be it would be against your will. It couldn't be passionate because I'd be struggling unless you're so you're so powerful that I can't struggle at all. Like you can't struggle at all It's like when a bear's holding down it's like a beaver or something. Yeah or like a fish

That's so much more funny because of their fucking stupid ass Tails is the only thing I can move And the bear's tapping out The bears is essentially munching up Dude bears are fucked up They eat you all you're alive Bears are fucked up I've seen a bear

Hit a Elk Like I think an elk or something It's so hard that it broke its back It died yeah It was finally like I saw it was so awful I saw a polar bear

That's so impossible to imagine What are you like hit with his head They struck it yeah If fucking a bear used its powerful As fucking arms Have you seen how their arms and legs look dude I mean like not in debt I've seen it at a glance

Naked bears are gross dude I've seen the hairless bears That look like something out of Skyrim Gross There is wide as you Like their arms are about as wide as you And they strike you I wouldn't have known

What did with anything? Wide You know interesting A lot of animals You can't tell some animals like that are when they're skinless. When the hairless skinless, that's crazy. That's actually

It'd be a little, it'd be more so. It's actually much more. It's like seeing a skinless rabbit is terrifying. Oh yeah. It's like, it looks so terrifying. I've never seen the skinless rabbit. I saw it because I've never seen it either, but I can imagine how terrified it. I felt so bad. I was in I was in Greece and went into the shop and then

there was the butcher corner. Yeah. And then you know, rabbit is very normal. They're not like over here, right? So I'm just seeing this skin rabbit like, and I'm like, Ah, no. Like, Victor's like, no. You want a rabbit? Grabs the rabbit,

a live rabid. Ravit. Just buy its ears. And then, and then he's, dangling it and the blood's spraying everywhere. He's wringing it out in front of it. What did you want, my friend?

You want the rabbit, huh? You want the rabbit? Yeah, no. I don't know. I don't know any Greeks. I don't know either. It's kind of close to, like, I don't know any pure blood Greeks.

I know, like, Greek that are part Italian. That's it, which I think. Most Italians are. I mean, I knew the pure bloods. I dated one. Ha ha ha. Welcome to come town.

That's my impression of a Greek. Oh, oh, I forgot about Starrose. His laugh is crazy. His laugh is, well, he's the, he's the laugh track. He fucking laughs so. Yeah. But notice that he has the same laugh every time. He does.

He has a very consistent laugh. Oh, interesting. They, uh, it's funny. They actually got back together for one. Oh, yeah, they did a finale, right? bullshit finale that was like 30 minutes long. Stavros is not even on the mic. He can tell he's like off to the side. And it was completely unnecessary, but also I guess for people that were looking for closure, it was kind of cool. I wasn't looking for closure. To me, the closure was already

done. They've explained that they've gone the separate ways and they're doing different things. I'm like, well, that's the closure. Were they fighting or something? No, I think that Stavros In a world of endless notifications, there could be an important one you're missing. Your kidneys may be signaling an SOS. With high blood pressure or type 2 diabetes, your kidneys could be warning you of early signs of damage, which may put you at higher risk for events like heart attack or stroke. But there's a simple test that can help spot a hidden signal. Ask your doctor about a urine test called UACR to help detect kidney disease and heart risk early.

To learn more, visit Detect the SOS.com. Today wanted to be a star. And Comtown is not the way. If you got a podcast called Comtown is going to limit your. It definitely worked. Yeah. So he stopped. I just saw him on like, he was on a John Mullaney's like, what do you call the Netflix

live talk show thing. I was like, oh shit. He was like sitting next to Jerry Seinfeld and shit. He's had a big Netflix special. He tours are sold out now. I don't know him by phone. He hangs out with Hassan all the time, which is weird. Is he the chubby guy with the glasses?

Yeah, he's the chubby guy. Sometimes wears glasses. He's balding. Oh, he's a cool dude. He's a cool dude. He's good. He's like, all of them are chill on the podcast, but he was definitely like, Nick Mullen was kind of okay with being. I would have been like Nick Mullen where like they were making over 100K on the podcast and on the Patreon.

Nick was fine with where he was. He was like, I'm, this is so stupid that I'm making this kind of money with the doing nothing. Exactly. And Star Wars was like, well, I, I, he, Star Wars just wanted to be famous. He wanted to be a star, which I don't blame him. If that's what he wanted to do, he was like, he's obviously hungry. Yeah, he's always very hungry. And so, I'll lay, I didn't even feel bad.

Nick Mullin doesn't have an appetite. He's like, he's like, dude, this is what, he released a special on his YouTube channel and how the lack of effort that, like, his editor. So the specials was supposed to be called Year of the Dragon. And it's for some reason, this is not. It's called the year of the dragon. And I'm just like, that would only happen to Nick. Like, just the, like, it made it to the thing. And he was like, oh, yeah, you know, that was a, that was fucked up.

It wasn't supposed to have two the dozen there. Whatever. You know, it is. And I was just like, yep, that's exactly. He really is like a breeze kind of guy. Yeah. He's like, I'm going to, well, the breeze is taking me this way. Let me go.

He is. And he's, I get it though. He, to me, he's a, there's, there's only a handful of true artists out there that I'm, like, damn, you're really good at what you do, but you really don't care. Yeah. To be successful, you have to have business sense as well. Yes. And a lot of people don't have, we don't have it.

No, not a no. No, we don't have business. No, it's, I have no concept. It's like, people get managers. That's why I was like, damn, we, I know we've talked about this a jillion times. And I was like, damn, we, I feel like. Where do even start? Well, see, that's something for me.

And the problem is. Yeah, you can go to like, pick out a manager. I mean, this one, this one's in 4K. You know, there's no obvious. obvious. If I knew how to get a manager, I would have got a manager. If I know how to get a manager, I would have said a manager. I would say something to quit. That is kind of the implicit. That's the, that's the tragedy of it, right? Is that if you knew how and like the avenues in which to go to even find somebody

who could manage something like this, you're probably that person already. That's the people of managing to begin with. It's almost like getting diagnosed and getting medicine for ADHD. Like specifically the processes for it are so. specifically designed for people who don't have ADHD. It's like go to this website, call this person. Oh, yeah. Fucking do this, this and this. Like, do you know why I'm here?

It's like, I can't do this. That's the whole point is that I'm here for them. I forget where I put my food that I just make and then go make food. I've made so many meals today. I don't think I have ADHD. I don't think I have ADHD. I definitely. Jesus Christ, like, I'm pretty bad.

Like, the healthcare process. It's, I can't keep up with it. I've been trying to get an endoscopy for like four years now. What's an endoscopy? You know what anodoscopy is, right? No. When you get the camsrobe down your throat? Oh.

Yeah. Colonoscopy. So yeah, endoscopy. I get it. But it's not your endoscope. It's your esophagus. It's your safagia. Savas.

So, savoscopy? Don't worry about it. I guess that's why they did go with osophagus. Well, it's just like inner, you know, into. Yeah, no, I get it. It doesn't matter. So, yeah.

That mattered so little. Through shit being so complicated and so dumb. So finally I get up to, so it's going to, I don't, so I can pay for one out of pocket for $1,200. I really don't want to do it. That sounds like hell. I really, really don't want to do it. I actually even thought about, oh, my girl. Paying $1,200 to get a camera shove down your throat sounds like a really terrible.

It does, but like. They put the camera on their dicks and then they put the dick down your throat. It depends on if you're awake or not. You saw it. I said it. Look. To be completely honest about that, it depends on if you're awake or not for the procedure. That's crazy.

Because if they just numb your throat, which is a thing that they can do and you can be fully awake for the procedure, which I don't want. But I also know that when they put me down, that they can put them down. They can, yeah, they'll put me under. Exactly. Put me down. And possibly put me down. Yeah, they could. There's like a really like.

you. What is the percentage chance of like, because, yeah, because you could like, there's like a pretty, like a shockingly high percentage chance that like if you go under anesthetic, you could just never wake up. I mean one is shockingly high. Yeah, one percentage is those stockyly. I just, I like the, the, the, the, I, the, the drips, whatever they, they, they just injecting you. I'd rather do that than like a gas or whatever. Oh, yeah. Yeah, because I, um, I just trust that more. And I, it was weird when I got my, the, my remaining wisdom to, pulled out when uh just because you you know you always feel it when it hits your veins it's like it's so crazy how fast it is so like you feel like immediately i feel like the warmness and i'm like whoa and then i've said it's seconds later i i wake up and the doctor's digging in my but i'm numb so i don't feel it but i'm like oh fuck have you slap in your jaw loose i he did do a quick jerking motion and then i heard a zip but i was like i have no i have no proof i didn't see anything i have no proof i heard something but That could have just been my imagination.

Yeah, exactly. Have you ever been under? No, never. It's crazy. It's a crazy experience. I've been under twice. Two or three times. Yeah.

And I woke up the first time. Oh, oh, he said that. Yeah. And you were screaming and then I didn't scream. I freaked out. Like,

I woke up and I felt cold in places that I've never felt cold before. And then I passed out from like the, I think the shock of it. Apparently that happens a lot. Apparently people do wake up. You felt cold in? Yeah.

Yeah. Like in places where you're just like, you know, they're cutting into you. And so, like, there's parts of your body that have never felt open air, hospital room, like, surgery room cold. Yeah, it's all freezing. Yeah, and it's just like, yeah, it's fucking great. But apparently that happens a lot.

Apparently, people just wake up during surgery. And most people just don't remember it because they're just under the gas. Right. But that's fucking. I feel like for me, I would have to get so much drugs so much because I'd be so anxious than I would just die because I'm so heavily drugged. Right. Yeah.

Like, oh, shit, he's dead. He overdosed in surgery. That'd be good. And they would just fucking get a. and malice and bang my head in. Well, he killed me. Might as well make some of it. Yeah.

I make it the ballads. Yay. The mallets, that's crazy. That's the most humane way they have to execute to put people down in a hospital. It's never like an unplugging the machine. It's never like an injection or something.

It's a clown mallet. That should be the new lethal injection. A lot of death penalty. They're like, all right. The new firing squad is clown mallets. I'd like that. I'd be actually. okay. And the victim's families are like, all right, let's get the mallets.

And some guy has his own mallet he made. Like, why do you have, I've lost a lot of family members. So I go out. Look, if we're going to like, you know, execute people who clearly are innocent, it might as well make it like funny. Might as well give a mallet. Yeah. Yeah. Just a ridiculously novelty mallet with a bunch of colors all over it. It says we. On the side of it. No, I'm naming that motherfucker Gallagher, dude. That's a dope-ass. Gallagher. Gallagher comedian who fucking smashed the watermelons or the mallet.

Bring, bring Gallagher the mallet. And then it just says like Gallagher printed on and fine print. Yeah. Beautiful work. Like Gallagher's face. His face is on the mallet. It's on the flat side.

That's actually kind of awesome. And then the flat side opens and then the flat side opens and then a little flag comes out that says bang. Yeah, just like that. After your face has been smashed in. Is that? It should be on the end of it. It should be the opposite end of the. face with the back. Oh, you're right. Yeah. Like the force.

Almost like a bazooka. After your brains are all over the floor. Do you that video of the Marine? I don't remember which military it was. But like he's like firing a bazooka and he doesn't understand that it like there's like blowback on the Oh, right. And he was behind him. He like flashbangs his entire team. I don't, how to say, I'm not sure how stuff like that happens, but you know. Yeah. And then I, and then it makes me think. Every, every, like, military shit that I always see on TV, I'm like, this is so fake.

It makes me wish. They're so tactical and they're so, like, smooth and shit. Yeah, it's a, it's a, it's a, it's a, I was just watching, I was watching, uh, I was watching, uh, and I'm not talking about the punisher specifically, but even the, the people that were involved. Are you talking about the movie or the show? Oh, sorry, the show. Yeah, the, the movie's insane. That movie is crazy, dude. Which one?

The, uh, the Punisher movie. No, there's a couple. There's a couple. There's war zone. Yeah. I think it's what I'm talking about. That guy that died recently. I think he died like a year ago or something.

Stanley? Yeah. Stanley's puncher has a punisher. I don't think he made a punisher. Exactly. He definitely didn't make the punisher. He definitely didn't make the punisher. He's like, I hate this thing.

He's fucking angry about everything. He wants to kill everyone. This is a cool. He doesn't, there's no winner. When I first made Spider-Man, I didn't want him to be a murderer. So I made a murderer instead. That is actually kind of...

So he could be a murderer. I love that. That is my... It's not bad. That's actually... He will forever be one of my favorite human beings, bro. He's made... He's made so much of...

Murder man. Murder man. This is murder man. You want to... A little on the nose, don't you think, Stan? No. Fuck you. Fuck you.

You're fired. Fuck you. Fuck you. I write a combo character about you, though. I'll give you some of the proceeds. Did you see that... Did you see that documentary that was... I don't want to talk about it.

What? There's a moiterman Coctuary? Moira, that's not how we speak. Some guy, some guy who I guess was claiming to be

Stanley's assistant for like a number of years put out like a crowdfunding thing for like a documentary about how he was like taking advantage of in his later years or whatever and he's been,

he did a crowdfunding thing where he wants $300,000 to make this movie. Nope. Yeah, that's exactly what I said. I'm like, bro, just make it. You need $300,000 for a documentary. You fucking

asshole. It's not like he can film new footage of Stanley being abused. He's just like a really prominent director. That is it. Where would the money be spent? He's going to have Timothy Shalamee play Stan Lee. That's crazy. Like what if it would be spent? That's what my thing is like he's got all the footage already, right? If he was talented, he could figure out how to piece that together and put it out.

$500 for a camera or look, I'll be charitable. A thousand. I'll be charitable. $4,000 for a really good camera. Yeah. Like a really good one. Yeah. That's literally all he needs. If he has the footage already, then now it's just pointing the camera at people. Bro,

even if you wanted to get like a fucking one of those red cameras. Like how, like, what's a red? I don't know. Camera. But like, when I see,

when I go to those, those are, so a red camera, $30,000. $30,000. You want that times? How many? 10?

He's a $300,000. It's fucking insane. That's crazy. I can make a fucking great movie. I mean, not me. I mean, I could get the resources to make,

have somebody make a good movie with that. You can make a good movie for $300,000. Yeah, I think films cost, like, when I see how much a movie cost, I'm like, how the fuck did it cost this? It's just usually, like, promotion and the actors. It's promotion actors, catering sometimes, because you have to have, like, depending on where you are, depending on where you are, you need to feed people. Yeah.

Which is good, theoretically. But the catering that I've been, a dude, a lot of the craft services were, didn't make sense. So money does go to that. Like, here's assholes like us, just, um, background actors. I'm getting paid nothing, and I'm eating swordfish. I'm like, why's there swordfish here? I don't need this.

It's delicious. How's swordfish? It's very good. I like those higher-end fish because they're... Do you eat the sword? Less, it's the best, it's the delicacy. The sword part? I don't know.

To me, I mean, like, the sword is like probably like shark fin or some bullshit. Some asshole is definitely cutting off that part and eating it like a beef jerky or something. Are they really that sharp? You know what I mean? Like a swordfish? They're probably really pointy. But could you cut somebody over with a swordfish? Probably.

I mean, I've seen them do it. I've seen a swordfish pop up and stab a guy. That's right. In a video with a guy, it comes in and they like fucking attacks the dude and it leaves and a guy's like, oh. And I was like, good. Imagine me. It was assaulted in. Being stabbed by a fish is so fucking crazy.

It's so offensive. You fucking fish. I said, did you send it to me or, wait, it was somebody giving like, it looked like a bass or a catfish. I'm putting barbecue sauce in his mouth. What about you? I was like, why? And then he put it on top of it too, then threw it back in there.

Yeah, to get it murdered. That video was crazy. That's just to get that animal. I found that video, I was like, I have to screen record this right now. I said to the Colin, and he was like,

I love this. And then I said it to the group chat with everybody in it. That's where I saw. That's what the group chat. And then I think still to this day, no one said anything in that group chat. So I think it's the last thing that's like,

Like that's so mead It's so good You're just setting it up to die It's really It's really vile Like probably like Taste it probably was like This is whatever this flavor is amazing

And they slathed it on it And threw it back in there Oh thanks God Imagine the other fish that eats that fish though And then it's like chasing that high forever It's gonna be this is how things evolved This is not like it's gonna It's gonna figure out how to have some sort of apparatus

To be on land It's gonna spiral its way through the sky And into Texas Barbecue sauce. Fine barbecue sauce. Yeah. So that was, it's technically animal abuse,

but it's, I mean, it literally is. Well, I mean, fishes are, whatever. People don't care about

fish. That's the problem. I mean, I don't either. Well, like, it's hard to care about it. It's,

it just is. Like, there's something about them. It's just so. Emotion. Even on their face. They're so unempathetic. I don't even care

about cats from being honest. Like, you can punch a fish. Yeah, but that's because you're a sociopath. Like, it doesn't like, It doesn't even like-

Caring about cats is crazy. Like you see, you see a kitten and you just think like you think nothing when you see a kitten? I think about putting it on a frying pan

and cooking it up. Yeah, you're crazy. Yeah. Yeah, you are showing yourself. You're showing yourself. I love puppies.

Like, I understand if you maybe don't want a cat as a pet, but to just be like, oh, I don't like cats, I can fry them is, is,

so it's another level. You kind of have a KKK mentality with this stuff. You really do. I mean, it's kind of, it's like, I like,

I like, I like, You're there. I believe you. I'm not. You're there. Dude, if somebody bought you like a grand dragon or whatever, you would wear it.

No, I wouldn't. Yes, you would. He's so lying. Pardon me, but I'm like, I cannot put this on my body. You wouldn't put it on once? No,

I don't believe you at all. Not either into the privacy of your own home? No, I wouldn't put it on. Such a lie. If we have any rich. I couldn't, I could not know I put that on my body. You can't stop complimenting it.

Guys, if we have any, if we have it. Aesthetically looks cool. You would wear it. You'd wear it as loungeware. You're not in my home That's what I'm thinking You guys go over here What's up dude

He's gonna come out to his mailbox You know like in the morning Like people wearing their fucking bathrobes And shit Yeah yeah He's kidding his mail Howdy neighbor? How do you neighbor?

I think that's funny But I just like Howdy? Lovely day isn't it? A lovely day neighbor I'm Kingston Jamison What's all?

Hey there Hey It's not like a fucking radio Josh That's not how I sound Guys come on I was watching like an Occupy Democrat's video

And that's how this one of the guy was sounding I'm like, why are you, why are you speaking like, why are you on a webcam talking like this to me? Hello. You're on a webcam and Don Lemon, he went on the Bill Marsh and I was like, why are you talking to me like this? Welcome to Occupy Wall Street. We're here on Wall Street occupying Wall Street. And today, Occupy Wall Street.

That's why I want like some guy just come out of frame just hit him really hard. Harpooned through his chest and then you get yanked off screen. dragged into the ocean. That's that classic vaudeville harpoon. Yeah, the vaudeville harpoon. That's amazing. That's how they,

that's how they, that's how they yanked Danny Kay off stage was that when he was doing poorly. Her fred astaire. He's like dancing and he fucks up a tap or something. One and a half. And then a harpoon burrows through his chest and he hangs in face. He's,

he's being dragged and he's like, ah. And he's still dancing. That's crazy. His feet are still tapping? Oh, speaking of someone getting murdered, people are talking about these fucking JFK files that got leaked. What?

And it's, I'm just seeing a crazy amount of anti-Semitism. And I'm like, whoa. Oh, God. What do you mean? Where? Let me guess somebody that was in the government at the time. No, it was Jewish overseeing something.

Probably. If I had to guess. I didn't know, I don't know the exact information of it. I'm like, yo, why is all of this? Because I thought you guys might know about it. No, I'm not on Twitter. I'm uninterested. I don't know what's going on in the Netsamites.

I'm not interested unless they can just be like, all right, we know who paid Lee Harvey Oswald. Other than that, because to me it's like Lee Harvey Oswald was clearly a communist sympathizer. He defected to Russia for a minute. And at some point, I think that somebody paid him to be a patsy. And then he did, he didn't do, he did not, I don't believe he acted alone. I really don't. I think he's innocent. I think he's, I think he's, I think J.F.K.

just had a really great idea and he couldn't handle it and his head blew up and his head exploded oh that's what happened yeah and it exploded so hard that the person in front of him

broke his rib and his wrist it exploded he got a little he got a little some shrapinal right it was actually

JFK's skull friday he fucking says urica and his head blows up I got it and then that got oh fuck what the and then and then

fucking he started looking behind for some reason then he saw Jackie's ass and he was like, God damn. The car blew up. It blew up and then it got coalesced into a wormhole and disappeared. Imagine seeing that exact thing happen on like, in person. In person.

Like old, like, decrepit. Like in that year. But the thing is, no one's talking about it. No one's talking about that part. We see it in the film. We've watched. If you look... My grandma's like, I was there.

I saw that happen. The Zuprooter, for some reason, the Zuprooter film only, like it, everybody only shows that first like 40 seconds, but they leave out the last five minutes where the car careens into a bush, explodes, a wormhole opens, takes all of it. And swallows it. And swallows it. And then everybody's left dumbfounded in the aftermath. That part of the Zepruder film is for some reason.

They start gunning down people there because they can't talk about it. Boom. The, the problem, the, the FBI and the CIA, all of, every faction of the government, like, fuck, we got to kill everybody there. We got to kill every single person in Texas. Damn it, we got to contain this. It's like Cecil comes in. It's like, we got to contain this.

We got to get to Texas. We can't let anybody. So people completely. A kid in his class reading the book. Boom. Have no idea about this. No way near Dallas The air

The air tastes funny teacher He just He's in fucking He's in fucking Wisconsin They put a dome that like They carve out a dome that fits Perfectly over Texas And then they just open

The top of it And just drop a nuke And then put a seal on it It's a guy that drops the nuke And then seals it A dome the shape of Texas So they perfectly make it A taxahedron

Exactly That's that is It's a official name. Yeah. And then they had a dome. Do you ever, do you ever seen

an old school popcorn maker? Like it's a dome and then it has a little cover on the, yeah, yeah. So you pour the corn in. Yeah.

And then you, yeah, so it's like that except for it's shaped like Texas. Of course. One guy's holding a fucking nuke. He's the whole one guy is holding a duke.

He's got it on a fishing line. He's like lowering it down. He taps on the ground. Psh. He taps on the ground. Yeah. Such an insane way to do something. And then now why people in Texas is so funny, the people that live there now is from all the radiation.

Right. So I'm Joe Rooka moved to Texas. He's fucking, he's a fucking mutant now. So why his skin is all green. Every couple of seconds on the podcast, there's like a bubble that pops out of his neck and it pops. It fucking grows, pops, heels. I think this is a better explanation than any normal thing. Like, I don't have any real explanation why people in Texas are.

so funny, you know? Yeah, that's got to be the only, there's no other explanation. Nothing at all. I've, I've searched long and far for a good explanation. Long and far. Long and far. Like, how do you move to Texas? How do you move to Texas being like, oh yeah, I understand stuff and, hey, Bernie seems like a good guy. You know, I endorse this guy to where, you know, like, Trump's the only one that can save this country. Well, you probably hear about Austin and you're like, Austin seems nice. Yeah. And so you go to Austin. It's cheaper than most, It's really all cost. Yeah.

I imagine Austin in probably because of Joe Rogan in 10 years, Austin's going to be worse in L.A. Because it's smaller. It's smaller. It's what? Like five feet wide or something? Yeah, it's about five feet. It's a three square feet of property.

You can't lay down in Austin. You're touching the borders of Austin. You literally can't do it either. You can't. I don't know how they make it work, but they do. They do. They figure it out. So it's going to be.

It's not designed for the amount of people that are. Like how L.A. is now. Yeah. Or it's just not designed for as many people. So like, yeah, get rid of all the people that look differently for me. Yeah,

I'd agree with that. I'd be, I'd be totally fine with that. It's like, it's like, some of the streets are like really narrow and there's so many fucking cars and I'm like,

this isn't right. Yeah. It bothers me that so many of the sidewalks in L.A. are so thin. It's like they'd never expected people to walk on them. No. No.

They never expected more than one person. By my apartment, it is two people cannot walk. There are parts, but two people cannot walk side by side. And it's crazy. I was like, what is this? Because growing up in, in the city, those sidewalks are huge. It's all meant for you to walk on all. That's the point.

But I never even thought about it. Like, I thought that was. No driveways, like that too there as well. So that's the thing. Right. But like those sidewalks are bigger than like some of the roads here. You know what I mean? It's fucking crazy how big those sidewalks are because they like, oh, people are going to walk.

I miss that. And like when I see people that are not not give people space. It's like how the fuck can you not give some space in the city? Like how are you out in the way? Yeah. You don't bothers me too? It's like here is like not only are the sidewalks thin. But then like in addition to that thinness, it's like, oh, here's a fucking tree.

Yeah. Yeah. In the middle. Or how high the sidewalks are here sometimes. Yeah. They're like a stick. Particularly where I live on my side. They're so fucking high.

I remember. I remember the first thing that happened when we got here was that we parked on the curb and we were like, oh, okay, it's a curb. And then we opened the door and the door. And I was like, what the fuck is this design? Isn't this place designed for cars? Apparently not. It's crazy. For big trucks, I guess. I don't know.

LA is an interesting place, man. I don't like it. After living here for almost 10 years, which makes me sad to say, interesting place. I want to leave so bad, but I just, no, no one doesn't to me. I'm hoping. No one will listen to me. Everybody just tells me no, and I'm like, why not? I'm down. Dude, I actually, I hate that I have some fond memories of being in Vegas, which is crazy to me.

Because when I was there, I was like, this place sucks. But now coming back here, I was like, you know, actually they did a lot of things right. It's pretty cool. You wake up and there's a scorpion sucking your dick. Yeah. I did. And you're like, whoa, for free? Crazy.

I never run into one school. And when I was in Arizona, that was actually like, yeah. And then that was when I discovered how fast scorpions were, too. Yeah. You wake up in Armadillo's holding your. fucking all your roommates at ransom. And Armadillo. Give me all the fucking money.

It was actually. It's actually exactly what happened. And I was like, what are you doing? What's your name? And he was like, I'm armored armadillo for Mega Man X. I'm here for you. You. If you kill me, you get my power.

So try to kill me, bitch. D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D. And you have two beeps. Beep, beep. I guess that would. It would make sense. I have a regular human being and then here's these fucking mavericks.

So I think I'd be like, yeah, that makes sense. I have two things and once he touches me, I explode. Do I explode into like the actual like, no, it's blood and viscerer. Yeah.

You don't get like cool, you don't get like an extra life for anything too. No, you just die real. I wonder what happens if a person eats one of those things. Like Megamins about getting

a guy swoops in. You just eats and die. I'm sure you, can't digest them. You just get cancer or something. You're like, good job. You fucking jackass. You're a person trying to eat robot parts.

You fucking chimp. Look at you. Doesn't Sigma look like Homer Simpson like if he was thin? What? I feel like that. You know Sigma? No. I'll pull a Sigma real quick.

You never played Mega Man's? Any other Mega Man X games? I don't know, man. I don't know, dude. I don't know, man. This shit's gay. I'm pulling Mega Man. Mega Man sex.

Mega Man sex. I'm going to show you, Sigma. Doesn't this look like just an evil Homer Simpson? No. You don't see it at all? Like, not even the shape of the head? That's all they got in common. That's barely even.

That's quite literally the only line. Dude, if I draw the hair and make him yellow. Yeah, if I make him Homer Simpson, you'll see it. And then say dough. But you can't do that with most. It's like, do. You draw a speech moment with dough next to anybody and it becomes over sex. Dude, I think some people would be, I see you.

Yeah, some people would Yeah, I know they're probably insane, but hey Some people are Casey Anthony also Some people are Casey Anthony Yeah, we'll get to question Yeah, we'll get to question Would you for the clout? Yeah, I would Okay, that's all I need to know

That's all I need to know for the cloud What? Come on, don't do this You know exactly Anthony? Yes Nah I don't think there's really much cloud there I think you get a lot of cloud

Because of people would be like how disgusting you are You're a slayer You're a piece of shit And also nice You know, I'd be like that She doesn't really It's not about It's literally not

It's like She's just one of the most High profile People like I get it I understand I just I don't know If I value that at all You know

I think having interesting stuff like that On your belt is kind of cool Maybe Yeah It's like It's like Like yeah fucking mother Teresa That was crazy

Like she was like While she was watching Her dick I was fucking I was fucking On that note I was fucking On that note

I got my question I got fucking I've always Wondheriot Tubman on my belt She's a hero. You won't want to fuck a hero. I would actually, damn. See, that's where I get, that's where the lines get a little blurbler.

Yeah, Helen Keller, right? That's the lines got a little blurb for me because I'm like, can I, I don't know why I feel about fucking disabled people. Would you fucking disabled person? Would you do it? See, like when it comes to that level, because it's just like, it's the fine line between,

is this consensual for them, like, legitimately? Yeah. You know what I'm saying? Like, there's that fine line. Would you fuck a female Forrest Gump? No. I think, see, like, That's the problem.

I've never seen the movie. Forrest Gump is, well, it's great movie. He technically is competent enough to work, but at the same time, that's the line. That's where I kind of, because am I, am I in since. That's where the radar jammer kind of. Am I a bigot for refusing somebody who may be a little bit? You're not a bigot for that. That's sexual preference.

This is more wiggle room. Like, I don't, like, I wouldn't consider somebody a bigot. Like, excluding people for simply, like, phenotypical reasons are weird. I feel like, but when it comes to mental reasons. Is that not the mind? Because is that not the same thing? No, different. Really?

Different. Yeah. Like, so if somebody was born in a specific way, like, say like a little person and I'm like, I don't want to fuck a little person because that's weird to me. Well, that's sexual. But that's sexual. You know, you can't. You know, you're just going to go put your dick in anything.

But what about what do people call them demisexuals? They're attracted to the mind or some shit. You know, I don't, I know. It's gay. But that shit is so gay. It's like, that's like, that's everyone. Yeah, I don't. That's always made me so mad about that.

That's every person. But listen, so listen, if you're attracted to something. So say, for example, you don't want to fuck somebody from the South because you know they're dumb. You know, but like you recognize that they're very attractive and stuff like that. But you're like, you know, you're a stupid idiot and you drool over yourself. I can't fuck with you. Like, is that, is that not the same as like someone like your limbs are too small for me? Get out.

Yeah. It's fine. Yeah. I think both of those are fine. I think both of those are not in a line of like Particulating somebody I think I think I think when you don't want to fuck someone that you're your your your you're you don't align with It's fine I think when you're like oh I'm not fucking simply because the way you look or your ethnic background it's different

Is that not the same thing though? I think it it's their like a line can be drawn between them But I think they're that's where those lines I just feel like those people it's kind of like Asian racism we don't take it seriously I feel it's like that because like you don't like well you don't either clearly I clearly do you don't either I do. No, no, collectively, we do not. We absolutely on a scale of, like, it goes Jews, blacks, and then kind of everything else just kind of falls to the wayside. Like, it's like, oh, we recognize this is fucked up, but we also, it's very easy.

It's like watching, I was watching Punisher, the Marvel series, and you can't, they can't say the hard R in there, but they can say gook. You know what I'm saying? I mean, the history is different, but yeah, I agree. It is taking less seriously. It's not very different actually. This is my point. It is, but I understand where you're coming from.

It's a different thing. Your place of argument is 100% right. What like say what the things that have gone through, some Asians that have gone through. Oh, you're, is it just as horrific. It's just different. It's because it's culturally.

It's because over here. It's definitely not good. It's definitely not good. I just think we take things more because it's like it's because of, it's like even the internment camps and what's going on with the oh the the espionage what what is that thing that trump's saying of that espionage action whatever he's saying claiming right now that they did in the world war two and that's what's saying we're invaded by these brown gangs so that's why we can deport everybody so you're using

that whatever that is sure yeah is it the espionage or i don't remember exactly i might be misspeaking whatever it is that they use to throw people into internment camps they're using that now and i feel like the reason why we don't look on it as fucked up because i just don't think we take seriously. I just do like it's just, it's kind of right. I think you're right. I think the process is that like first and foremost, most Asian people are not. Oh, here we go. Not that it's not. Not that it's not.

Not that it's not like Asian people are considered more so white adjacent. That's a huge thing, which is unfortunate. I think it's in, when you're thinking about Americans, particularly in America. I'm totally in America. Because of their like because of how things have worked out for them, I think is why. And also they

applied for Caucasianness. That's the whole thing. I mean, I don't, I don't, I'm disagree with that, I guess. And it's not fair. It's still not fair for them to be belittled the way they are. Particularly when it comes to black in the Asia community. There's so much, fucking disdain between the two of them. Can I be insane?

Yeah. This is hilarious. We're going to go on to a question. I think it's, I can make it funny. I can make sounds. Yeah, well, yeah. You had a good three minutes. So we're going to move on to some questions.

This is very educational. Yeah. For our patrons over at Patreon. Keep up. Patreon. It's not a green guy in a suit. What? It's not a green guy.

Are you talking about mussel? The mask? I thought about mussy. Is he in a green suit? Is he in a green suit or just the green face? He's a green face. He's a green face. He's usually like a yellow suit or something.

The mask? The mask. Who? You know the man in iron mask? You know, I'm talking about. You know, jump on over to Patreon. comfuss or snarkang. If you want to ask us some questions,

like the ones that we're about to read here from our lovely patrons, go over there. I don't want to say lovely. Actually, it's probably not. I don't want to be that kind. Wow. Wow! He says,

so Sweeney's disgusting mouth noises when it's quiet, Rodin. I love that. Yeah. He says, Hello, Mr. Tank, Mr. Tank, and Mr. Tank.

First time patron here, welcome. Let's go. Let's go. Thank you, sir. My question is for... And or ma'am. Oh, yeah.

It's impossible to tell what he's names. Thing. Thank you, thing. Thank you, fucking item. Oh, my God. Thanks a lot. Object. Says,

my question is, for you all is what is the most bizarre or perplexing thing you've seen an animal do, be it in person or online? My question comes after I saw a particularly heinous video during my Facebook content moderation job. It was so heinous that I needed to give you I needed to give you my money to tell it

to you. It was a video of a calf Do I really want to If it's like There's a video of a calf vigorously sucking a dog off. Oh, that's funny. That looked like Scooby-Doo. The dog initials let it happen for a bit, but then it backed away, only for the

calf to go on for seconds and thirds, and the dog backed away again. I wish I could show the video to you, but I honestly don't want to have calf sucks a dog off anywhere near my internet search history. Thank you for being retarded and gay. Keep it up. Again. I saw a video similar to that. There's nothing.

I bet. I've not seen animals sucking on animals. No, no, no, it wasn't sucking off. It was like a little, like a goat nursing from a dog. and then the dog tried to get up and the goat boinked it and then kept nursing. Oh, like hit it with his head? Yeah, like probably not the dog unconscious.

Yeah. And he kept going. Come back down there. That's so crazy. Animals are crazy. He basically mugged him. Yeah, kind of. Or her, I guess.

It. Object. I don't see very, like, because all my, my algorithms are just wholesome animal stuff. So I don't usually see anything weird because I, anything weird that I've seen,

I would go out of my way. to like don't show me shit like this. Right. Because I absolutely don't want to see it. But the only things that I see that weird me out and I guess this is pretty normal so it's not that crazy is when animals do things that are so human-like, it kind of freaks me out a little bit. It's a little bit because I forget that, you know, they're animals.

But then they're doing things. I'm like, right, well, we're animals too, right? So we just evolved past what they are. But like there's a guy that's fucking with a cow. He has like some green shit, right, to give the cow to eat. And he puts it up to the first. face and then yanks is away right before the cow can get it. He does it two times. And then on the third time, the cow, straight up like a human was just like, nah, fuck you. And he turned his

head around like, nah, fuck. Like, it went like this and it was like, uh-uh. And then he was trying to give it to it. And the cow went, uh-uh. Like, it was one of those things where I'm like, I've usually like a dog or something, we'll never, well, you can do that to a dog forever. Like you can keep fucking with a dog and the dog's kind of keep getting the food and kind of trying to get the food. I've seen people tease animals like that. But that cow, after just two tribes was like, fuck you, bitch, I know what you're going to do. I don't want it. And to me, I was like, that was so human to me. Like, it was so like, you know, like, I don't normally, I don't normally see an animal's doing shit like that. I see the cat like eating from a thing

and they couldn't grab it well and they looked around actually and instead of eating it with both its hands. Oh yeah, yeah. It looked around to be like, no, it looked around like it checked. Like it was like, what? Like, this is going to be a little embarrassing. I know I think was it over-exposed it. I think they do that because they're not like around predators. when they're really trying to focus on doing something so it's like... Okay. I go doesn't check behind it at all.

They have the wherewithal to go lift right but not behind. It's funny. I think the only thing I think of when this question comes to mind... The moment he drops to the guard. The only thing that comes to mind when I read this question was that video of that fucking... I don't know if it's a crocodile or an alligator. But it just rips the arm off of that other one

and the other one just doesn't care. Oh, it's like, oh, well, that happened. It just doesn't give a shit. It's such a... I don't... I don't understand that animal, man, or that entire fucking... Fylin. Yeah.

It's a terrifying... They're literally just monsters. You idiot. Don't do that. Yeah. I'll never forget it, too, because it's just like, it reacts, but in such a... Like, the arm is gone, and then it just goes... It looks at camera.

Yeah, just like, it looks... It looks at the thing that bit its arm off, but, like, not even directly. It was like a... kind of like a vague side eye where it's like in its peripheral. Why did you do that? And it doesn't retaliate at all. Like I guess because it can't verify which one did it. Also I am at so it's a lot of crocodiles to be fair like in that pit.

If I wanted to be like rational about it, I would say that crocodile is probably a gate or whatever it was. It's on the verge of death. Well, more so now, definitely. Yeah. Well, I mean, they can live without limbs. That actually happens in a long time. I really think they're such freaky creatures. Those sounds they make make me so.

scared. It's insane. I love how brutal they sound. They sound like this. Demons. Things I would have to imagine. They sound like chainsaws almost. It's fucking crazy. They have this weird. I like when they do this, this such a guttural fucking growl. Like, and I'm like, damn, what does that mean? Is it like,

is it actually anger or, because you know, like, say some dogs, some people are confused. Like, where you'll hear like a dog growl sometimes. And I don't think it's like angry and it's not that. It's something different. And I'm hearing some of their guttural things. And I'm like, is it anger or is this a certain, I don't know. I've never heard a dog grow. Like, I think dogs, you know, they only make, they only make noise to alert people. So that's the, so like there's a, what are the, what are the, what are, I think Rottweilers are, are really known for having these terrifying sounds when they're like relax.

Yeah. And you like, like, like chainsaw. And like, like, you start, like, they're not angry. But, like, people would. Oh. Uh. Uh. Uh.

Wow. Wow! You ever heard those fucking, those Rottweilers that say wow? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Those are crazy, those ones. They're so interesting. Let me pull it up. I hate that name, too.

Rob Wiles. Yeah. Doesn't sound like, those are, that sounds like they're sick. Yeah, it sounds like a corpse to me or like a, like something that's a necromancer, like, conjured, you know? In a world where Rottweiler was not a dog breed, it would be a great name for like a zombie detective. You know what I mean? Yeah. Hey, Mr. Rottweiler.

Come take a look. Yeah. It's me, Rottweiler. It's a damn good name. That's kind of cool. It's a shame that it's taken by a fucking dog. All right, let's move on. Let's get this question by the void.

Oh, here, growling when happy. Let me see if I can hit this real quick. Yeah. That sounds horrifying. Those dogs are no fucking joke, man. I'm not into that, man. I don't know you. I don't like, I don't like,

I don't like those kind of dogs. I've always like just like dogs that are like more houndish. Yeah. Or shepherds. I've loved those are my favorite. Shepherds are nice. Yeah. Anyway.

Way too much maintenance though. Fucking crazy dude. When they shed it's a nightmare. Yeah. The shedding to me. It's a night. Yeah. Just covered in here. I thought it was a design on the fucking blanket. it was so much. You got to, as soon as the change, man, you got to give them that wash and it's,

it's, you got to comb them. Yeah, well, you got to give it that nice wash and then just brush it through every week, but it sucks.

Giving a dog that that's big as gosh, how is it terrible? That's not, if the dog, if you train your dog well, like, I lived with the German Shepherd for years and it was awesome.

I had one for my, he was actually a fucking coward or could people be afraid of him, right? And then that motherfucker would like go under, like,

my buddy would go under his legs like, oh shit. Like, and I'm like, you pussy. Like, what are you doing? My dog was rough. She was, she was playful. And I was just like, dude, just get, just get in the water. And then as soon as like, what happens every time I'm like, are you done washing her? And she'd be like, out the water into that.

And I'm like, no. And right into my bed soaking wet. And I'm like, I can't. You weren't strong enough to. No, she would just zip out. He's the fucking German shepherd. I'd be like, oh, my grandma would call me. And she'd be like, oh, the door's open.

Jackpot and she would run inside. I'm like, oh, girl. You just did everything wrong. She was a good dog. Well, I just mean like the aspect of why is the door open while you're washing. Because my grandma would peek out because he's like, oh, it's something going on. I'm like, I got it. You still washing the dog?

I'm like, no. Oh, she opens the door and then like and then walks away. She opens the door and the dog's like, oh, jackpot. And she's old so she's not going to be able to stop this dog. So knocks your grandma over. In the house. It's flying. Jumps in the bed soaking wet, pulls out

fucking dynamite lights it. No! Rock! No! My room! It's standing there in the aftermath, like perfectly fine, like panting.

There, just can't wait to do it again. It's dry now, though. More dynamite. More dynamite. My name. Ritamite. I miss my miss a dog. Rynamite.

Ritamite. Right. I'm just having a dog I won't so badly Yeah I can't wait I want to move Because my apartment there Only have grandfathered pets

And I was like fucking You only get like 50 year old pets Yeah you can only have grandfathered pet It's exactly what that means It's pets before that mine lord right So yeah they're like Oh no more pets for them And I was like fuck you

Just get a Push them down the stairs Get a guy in a dog suit Get a dog in a guy suit Oh yeah Yeah Put him on the lease And it's like you can't prove

that this isn't a guy because you'd have to assault him in some way To go out of assault To see what's happened That's very true See if he doesn't eat you He's weird

He's a feral Try to pull his mask off Go ahead, I'll sue you Anyway, the void rone Says hey kings Any advice when looking for A good roommate Green flags to look for

And red flags to avoid Thanks King Ramsey And the men and gauze I hate that Don't like that I've lived with Infinity billion people Because I've rented many rooms

That seems impossible I think it's more like 10. Shut up. Close. Probably closer like 20. Yeah, that's

close. Well, I guess that's closer to infinity billion. It is a little closer. It's, it's,

it's two times closer, actually. Yeah. That's a good point. You know there are bigger infinity's that other infinites? That's just so stupid.

I don't know what you're saying. Some infinity is a big another. Continue with what you were saying. Yeah, don't let him continue. Yeah, this guy's talking about like buzz light, you're and shit.

Shut the fuck up. Never said it. No. Like a buzzlight your D&D fucking story. It's like, You wake up in a fucking cardboard box. You wake up and you're gay and dumb.

First story of D&D probably wouldn't be too bad, actually. Yeah. Actually, it's stupid fucking story. I'd have fun with it. It'd be fun. You might have a story from it. You can build your own,

you can make your own toy. It's like Liza P pretty much. Yeah. I'm, all. I mean, I guess not really at all. It's only in,

only in like the loose, only in the loosest conceptual way. Because you could be trying to become a person. I never play Liza of P. Are there real people? on that? Yeah. Yeah. There's like not many, but there are real people. Okay. There are people. And are they like weirded out

that you're running around and you're like No. No. They're more concerned with everything else that's happening. In their haunting world, this one like fucking homunculus boy that's not trying to murder them is not everybody's biggest problem. Which is because he's like traditionally like pretty. You know? Right. He's like a Timothy Shalamey. Yeah, because I actually, when I look at the cover,

I'm like, not bad. And then I'm like, oh, wait, that's a Oh, never mind. Well, I wouldn't say never mind. You're like, nah, no, no, go, go for it. Yeah, so you look at the fuck was I saying. You looked at infinity billion people. I live with infinity billion people. And the rules were, here's the thing, man.

The rules, if you're the one, if you're the one doing it, all you got to do is talk to them about their habits of hanging out. To me, that's the most important thing because I 100% don't want to live with anyone that. that makes themselves too at home. And it's one of those things that people will, oh, like the living room, people have access to the living room, but we all stay in our respective spaces. And maybe when something happens,

we'll all get together or shit, whatever. It's always been like that, but if there's that one guy that's always there watching the TV or always, don't, I just want, that person usually becomes problematic. A lot of times they're more selfish, where they're like, oh, I live here. I can use any of the stuff.

You said I can use it. And I'm like, you don't want to live with that person. You want to live with a person that's kind of coy. It's also a little, like, disrespectful. We're like the last place I lived in. I was renting a room. And we had access to everything. But we just used, you know, we cook at certain times.

We would not get in each other's way. Kept our fucking parts clean. That's really, like, keeping the stuff clean, especially the fucking bathroom. Yeah. When you're sharing a bathroom with people, if you have your own place, do whatever the fuck you want. You're sharing a space with people. The bathroom, as much. my mom would always say, leave this place as, as he came in or whatever, whatever stupid, yeah, however.

Leave it cleaner than you came in in my, in my mind. Oh, and cleaner. Well, that's, I understand that, but that's bullshit. That's nice. That's a nice sentiment, but nobody does that. I do it. For me, you do that? I do, actually.

You leave it cleaner than when you left it? I genuinely, every time I have pissed in any, any bathroom that I've ever been in, I have taken toilet paper to, like, wipe, like, the rim. I wipe the, I, I do that by necessity because I don't want people to think I did it. Like say, like, if there's piss on it already, I'm like, I got to do this because somebody might have done it, but I was the last one. It was like, right. That's always that's always a safe base. Yeah. For me, my biggest thing for roommates is try to acquire a decent degree of friendship with the people you live with.

I think that's very important. You definitely want to have cool people. What happens is that once there's commotery, you'll be able, on both sides, they'll be able to, like, exist in the space better. You'll be more willing to help someone that you live with. Yeah. That is you're cool with. You'll be willing more willing. like, oh, I'm going to make sure I clean up after them.

Because there's other person shared space with me too. And I'm cool with that person. I don't want to fuck them over. Yeah. And just also like, just try not to be a dick. That's it. It's trying to be a jerk. I've only had in my life genuinely one bad roommate.

And they weren't even bad. It was the situation that preceded a person involving them that was too close. I've had a couple of bad roommates. But that's it. I love with Chris Jalen and Joe. We were cool. We've known each other. So that's like very different.

I lived with. I can never live with a random person out of that. That's also another thing to live it with a random level. I think that's what they're asking for. Yeah, that's, I mean, that's a tough one. I live with many random people. For the most part, people are in the same position as us. They're like that they just want a nice, chill spot to live in.

Understandable. Understand this. And maybe as you gain experience, you'll start to snuff this out. Understanding, just by looking at some people, you can tell how rough their life is and what they're going to be like. Like, say, I was crashing on my friends. spot for a minute in like in between a place and his roommates I was like oh I can tell these people are like druggy and I was like this is going to be a problem and it actually became a problem to where I got these um before my heart condition was diagnosed on what it was they gave me like a handful of

benzos like 12 of them gone and uh half of them are gone and I was like fuck and my roommate was like dude uh the guy I was friends with he was like he's like I understand but I you know I need these people's rent like I just like you know he basically was asking me not to cause any problems I was like out of respect for you but I'm like that's crazy that you're living with drug addicts and like they just stole my drugs I was like I actually need this for my heart because if if I have an episode then it's crazy down but there are benzo so she was like ooh went through my shit went through my stuff and she was like I didn't do it and then the guy he came up to me he's like no I promise you shouldn't do it I'm like yeah they just walked out on their own like even though you guys

They're drug. Okay, I fucking believe you. I totally believe you guys. Drug addicts are, when it comes to drugs, it's insane, man. That's a rough person. I've never really had direct interactions with drug addicts. They might be nice people, but they're fucking addicts. I've never really had interactions with drug addicts like that. God bless. That was my, I worked with an alcoholic, man.

I worked with an alcoholic one time. Thank God. It was just rough. Like, they're like, they were nice fucking people, but they have an addiction. Oh, they're possessed. Yeah. Literally. I'm like, if you.

If you sense anything like that, absolutely not. Don't even give them a chance. Unfortunately, it's mean, but they should go to a fucking like a sober living situation. Like, yeah, it's not for you. You're not equipped to handle that. Especially, you know, you're just getting a roommate. Oh, no, that'll fuck you up. His first roommate's a fucking heroin addict.

That sucks. You signed a lease already? He signs a lease, then that room is fucking gone. The amount of my friends that have signed leases and there's a hell. There's a pit of hell somehow got sunken into that room. oh no man I'm sorry I didn't I didn't take your well this cover it

and he just gives you like fucking a pack of gum it looks like that fucking decrepit like that abandoned island Hashima you know that place where it's like they used to build like Mitsubishi worships or something that shit's crazy like it looks like

it looks like it was nuked you didn't just walk in the room you're like I he's just immediately close it again you just give up you open the door to the room and somehow it's outside and there's like

There's like a crumbled awning. It was like, I love I love the idea if you open the room door and then the room door opened to something else and your door is jammed on another door trying to open. You're like, what is it? Never mind. I'm 100% closing it again.

Because I'm like, I can't deal with that. I'm not at all. Yeah, drug. I am so good. It sounds really like callous, but like I really, I can't. My tolerance for that is absolute zero. It's probably gone.

I'm sure at some point, like when they get help, they'll be like totally cool people. Oh, oh. But like, I'm not being around. That's one huge rule. You establish a guest rule because, and I mean strict guest rule to where even if you're a relaxed person, like where you're like, but make sure that it is very specifically stated within the lease or whatever. And you guys speak about this. Because I always look for, I had to have, I had to have overnight guest.

It wouldn't ever. So there are some places that wouldn't allow it. So I couldn't stay there. But I would have to be in those places. I was always respectful. But, you know, I definitely want, you know, people to sleep. over like if I was in a relationship or whatever and they wouldn't live there but they were every once in a while I was just like every once in a while they'd come over and so if there's no overnight

guess and overnight it just make it very fucking clear I I am such a person uh from coming family wise and then over exemplified with my friends I am someone that is so okay with guests I have no problem with it yeah uh my girlfriend is not that person at all lily does not like having guests very often she that is not her thing we'll throw something the bridge inside our house while I get the get-togethers but Lily is not for that for me uh because especially when we live together of me and Chris our house is open door policy pretty much damn near like people were at our house we had a sign we had a sign for we had a sitcom apartment like yeah people would just walk in through the door and then be like oh hey I'm in town and the dude would

clap even when we're not home like our friends like hey you want to stop at your place yeah go do it do it yeah it really was kind of like it's fine go do it and it was it was like four of us too in that one right it was four of us then are the friends three of of them lived somewhere else and another one of our friends came to live with us for a little bit of time. Then another, it was just like, it was just like revolving door.

Yeah. We had a cast of people and all sorts of situations that came up. I remember when that kid showed up. That child? A child. Excuse me? That was so annoyed. Like we, somebody,

no one, I don't, did you know about the party? The party that that was like associated with? Like, it was like, it was like some party for someone. No.

I didn't know about it either. Like, I came home and there was like some party going on. I was like, okay. Your house. Somebody's thrown a party. This is what I mean, where I was just like, it really was, like, insane.

That is nice. And we would show, I showed up, and I guess it was like some party. I think it was like a Kevin-oriented party. And we'll keep it at the first names, just so it's not to out anybody. But I think it was like a Kevin Sorbo. Yes, exactly. Kevin Sorbo showed up. I didn't mean out Kevin Sorble, but yeah.

And he was like, and he got there and he realized it was in some shitty apartment. He screamed to the sky. He screamed, disappointed. Yeah, yeah. But Kevin, yeah, yeah. So it was a Kevin Sorboebo themed party. Everybody dressed like, everybody dressed like, everybody dressed like, Everybody dressed like all of Kevin Sorbo's iconic characters.

So just Hercules. So Hercules, Hercules, Hercules, Hercules and unemployed Kevin Sorbo. Those are the, those are the attires. And when I got in there and it was like a bunch of people like, we were like maybe like 25. No, we were not. 25 yet. We were not that age yet. It was 26, 27 maybe.

We were not. It was that apartment though. It was. We were not. So I turned 25 when we were leaving that apartment. okay so 24 whatever we were 24 and it seemed like I guess like a lot of older people like maybe like late 30s

or something like that and I was like okay I guess somebody someone's throwing something and somebody had a kid because it was their fucking kid I guess and I just remember being like I don't like this at all I don't like a strange child in my apartment yeah no I hate this

no way I don't remember the first time that's the first time to me the second time one of our friends did we all huddled in my room basically to like wait wait out the party Why is there kidding? That's crazy. In your house. Yeah, because I had the biggest room.

Right. So, like, we all just, like, everybody just ended up in my room. We were just, like, hanging out, waiting for the party to end. Like, you're so weird. That sounds so insane to me. You're like, you guys share this space,

and then you have to inconveniently all huddle in your room because you all don't want to deal with the party. I don't know how to talk. It was funny. I don't know. It was hilarious. It didn't bother me, really. It was just like, what is good?

I was just more confused than anything. I have. Because I didn't really have anything. Anything that I have to do is in my room anyway. Sure. I don't want any children anywhere near my home. Especially because I hid knives all over the apartment. Just in case, I won't know.

I watched my nephew now, I watched some kid get really close to one. I was like, oh, shit. Ow! My neck is exploded. Well, yeah, no, I watch my nephew now. So that's weird. But he's like five. Well, family, that's the only exception, really.

Yeah, five. This is a child I never seen before. Yeah, I understood. Well, dude, even like a few years ago, I would be like, no. Should I be like, hey, can you watch him? If Kingstar brought his kid Oh, ew, I didn't even concept I didn't even concept why he said as a possibility

I would call the kid the inward over and over and over again I forgot that he showed up That's funny we left It's funny as hell of that life That's why we left the juju was wrong You burned the sage You know it's crazy the second he left we got roaches Killer

It's killer Kingston He touches the floor and it becomes like dirt And then roaches come out of his Parting gift out of his fucking beard They all fucking got said It's like the bees in that movie That we saw The fucking monchies

The monkeys B movie The monkey? B movie Oh the monkey The monkey Yeah B movie B movie

B movie B movie Anyway Yeah avoid drug addicts Avoid drug addicts Yeah Although they Some of them are good at hiding it

Man Some of them are surprising I don't know Like I was dating one for a little bit And I didn't know Until like fucking months later Same actually That's crazy

And it was really just because I was uneducated about like that world like I'd never been in that world before so like there were things where I was like you were too close to the darkness well I just remember seeing I remember I noticed something was wrong

I was like are people's teeth supposed to bleed in the morning I feel like that's not normal sounds like ginger vitis no but like you know yeah yeah that's what it was apparently but that's great

I've never had any of that it's as fucked up as my fucking existence has been I've never no drug addicts definitely crazy, crazy people, but no drug addicts. It's a wild world. It is wild. You're right. Some people are definitely good of hiding it.

I hope she's fine, by the way. But that was like a fucking, you know, that was crazy. Yeah. I didn't want no part. I could tell that person or was off the moment I spoke to them. Yeah, yeah. I was like, oh. Whatever.

Let's not do it. But yeah, hey, try it up. Have some fun. Don't be afraid of, you know, having women, too, from my experience, their better roommates. Don't fuck them, though. Well,

that's usually not going to happen. Usually the owner, there's owners that have these scenarios thinking that they're going to get pussy by doing that. It works zero percent of the time. Don't fuck your roommate. Some guys are really direct and will put in their ads saying like, yeah,

you know, like females only. And yeah, you can sleep in my room. Like literally it'll be. That's so crazy. And I'm like, who is going to say yes to this?

Don't fuck your roommates. I just don't. I don't think that is the one thing I really think you should know you should I don't think it's such a rare because it's like it's a very business people are there to just they need somewhere like you're going to be gone at work most of the day and somebody needs somewhere to sleep essentially yeah a lot of the times those people are in relationships it's like it's it's uh as if you're if you're if you're a person that's raining out the shit it's yeah let me I'm gonna get female ruhrubilo foggum what what

is this national lamp what do you think this is this van wild or something? What the fuck do you think this is? Quite literally, my name is National Lampoos Van Wilder. That's my name. That's my name. They based those movies off my fucking grandfather. All right, let's move on. Let's get a question from Help.

He wrote in, he says, He says, hello future subjects of a documentary and not in a positive one, I assure you. My question is, if you could add any actor-celebrity musician to any piece of media, what would it be? I'd personally add Conan O'Brien to the Herald of darkness music video segment from Alan Wake 2, but not as the character, just as himself,

getting progressively more confused and frustrated. Also, Alan Wake 2 is a super recommended, yeah, no, I love that game. Great game. But it's such a weird fucking video game. But Ryan is in so many video games. Is it on a launcher, though? Yeah, it's on Epic. That's the, that's the issue with it on Steam anyway. I forget, dude, I haven't claimed so many games because I forget I have Epic. I have a press account on Epic and I barely use it. I have like Warhammer the what is it the The new one The what is it the 40K Space Marine 2?

I got it like I had it on there just like I bought that shit on TV I didn't play it That's the one where I was like oh cool okay I'll go out of my way to play that But then I went to New York and then I came back and I was like You know now now it's just like a A war of will to even open the launcher again

I don't even, for some reason, I don't even have it installed. I was like, what happened? I thought I used to have it. I played the same games over and over again. This is a waste. I'm like, I've got to play different games, man. It's hard. I played Baldess Gate 3 again.

I'm like, come on, dude. I haven't, it's crazy. I haven't played since it came out because I'm trying to stay disciplined. I'm trying to play different things. I fucked up and started doing the Force and lease. I talked about it on one of the last shows. I started playing Force of Lille. I went back, way back.

And I was like, damn, what am I doing? And so now I'm going to try. I like any of you sitting in front of the Force Unleashed, being like, just having a moment. You're like, damn, what am I doing? You. It's so, it's, we as humans, man. We want familiarity and comfortability. And so trying to force yourself to keep playing new things unless, like, say, it's your job.

You know, let me go out of here to do this. I got to try these things out. Even then it's hard, man. Right. Even then I'm just like. But you got to do it. I know. And me, I don't have to.

So I'm. I don't. And even though I should because sometimes I buy the games. I'm getting so, I bought Monster Hunter. I played one hour

that fucking game. That game runs like $75 for one fucking hour. For an hour is kind of crazy. God damn it. Shit on fucking PC though. It's really fucking horrid.

Yeah. Like I wouldn't might. It's so fun. It's so fun to play though. Really, really fun fucking game. Yeah, I'm sure.

Yeah. I love beating up monsters really, really bad at making them limp away from me. I'm so not. I let them limp away too. I'm like,

I'm gonna find you. Go ahead and run. That's crazy. Go ahead and run. Anyway, it's funny that you bring up Conan O'Brien because Conan O'Brien is in like a million video games for some reason. People like him, man.

I love, I think Conan O'Brien's great, but, like, it's so weird that he's in that world. Like, he's in death stranding. Which means he's had, like, extended interactions with Kojima, which is hilarious to imagine. Like, why? Where's the intersection? And then he's in Halo 4 also, I remember that?

That was, like, a weird fucking thing. He was like a Marine. him and Andy Richter were Marines Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, that's right In the corner of some Was they at them? I don't know I mean, they were

They had helmets on And you couldn't really tell But like they were them basically And I was just like, what is He's in so I think just that clueless gamer thing Really did wonders It probably did yeah

It's a great way to promote too Like hey, let's put this motherfucker in the game He'll do Clueless Gamer It's fun Everyone likes Conan's great It's just crazy to me that like It bothered me a little bit seeing those those segments not necessarily because i thought they weren't funny but because like i looked

at some of the things that he was allowed to say about the things that were clearly paid to be promoted there oh sure like and he'd be like what is this piece of shit and he would like go out and like they're all the devs are virgins and like everybody like they're all fucking losers like what kind of a jerk would spend his time playing this i just feel like and i just think like i why am i not allowed to say that about like raid chatel legends when i do like a sponsor you know what i mean like it always bothered the shit out of me i was like why some people i get it he's conno brian but like it's it's so frustrated dude it's like a it brilliantly come town got to that level to where the brand started to recognize people are listening to these entire ads because of the way

nick is just absolutely shitting on them and making up horrible things talking about me yundis and just saying horrible things about them or scenarios of like yeah you know and but it's great stuff i literally don't listen to ads unless they're like that. Exactly. And so I was like, this is brilliant. And it's actually, I've literally learned about something. It's been, I've learned about, I understand what Blue Chew is. When before, it's a, it's a Viagra. It's the, wait, wait, wait, no, don't mention it. Because they're not. Oh, right. They're not paying us. Yeah, Blue Chew's a thing. It's a thing. Right. Sure. And, but I understand what it is because I've listened to many ads and they're always funny on that show. You know, that's, that's like, it's kind of like, um, um,

that's like when Norm MacDonald had his show he had those ads for I don't know if you ever seen the ads that he did for the for the man grate man grate have you seen those

it was like a it was like some something that you'd put on a grill and it was like some fucking it was something but he shat all over it he was like you ever hear of the man grate and he like his guest is like I have he goes you have he's like you heard of this fucking thing

really He had like three ads with him And then they cut him off And I was just like That's so stupid Because like that's the only reason I know about the band Great is because I sat through that entire ad Because it was so damn funny

Dude it's it's a shame because when I was doing I was with Raycon for a while To where their headphones started off being like These are serviceable And now they're like where They're actually okay now They're actually like serviceable So I went through their evolution

And I tried like okay We've been rocking for a while like I want to um I wanted to get more creative and I wanted to because they were associated with Ray J because Raycon's Ray J that guy like I wanted to get creative and I wanted to kind of take a couple of shots at him and do something like Kim Carter yeah I wanted to do some something you used to be able to kind of yeah they and then they clamp down on it they specifically I don't know if you ever read the contracts that they would give you but like I remember one of the I don't have where a lot is whatever it's been years yeah but like one of the one of the stipulations was like don't

make fun of Ray J. And I was like, but I was just like, okay, I guess. I want people to laugh. Like, right. The worst thing I can do at one time they. A lot of brands don't understand how important it is to just like be funny. Yeah. At the very least, I, so I try to sneak one in or at least where I mention Ray J.

Because they, they, they at a certain point, they're like, don't even mention them anymore. Yeah. And, uh, too many people were just like, I just took a screenshot of him, you know, in, it's blown up where it's clearly. one of the scenes where he's fucking could crash in. That's crazy. I feel like I saw that.

I feel like I saw that somewhere. Hey, uh, um, yeah, could you, you know, they'll give you notes.

Yeah. The notes for that are awesome. I would always hate the notes that I would get because it was always, it was always, it was like, you said the E25. It's actually every day in E28. Shut the fuck up.

They know. Right. This is the 17th thing I've done. You know, one time? I can't do shorthand. They had me cut out. Meanwhile, they're having Adidas commercial where it's just some guy being like, I love you, son. And then the commercial ends.

And they don't even show a shoe. There's like a logo of Adidas on the corner. Yeah. Oh, yeah. That's great. Oh, I want him. I want it all now. Great.

Never would do the hour older on or they're like in in house ads? No. I'd be, what? So. No. I would always try to add a joke to it. And they'd be like, you got to change that. I'd be like, really?

It's just so stupid. Oh, right. For the, the rad reads we have. Oh. Oh, yeah, that's right. That place.

I forgot. You got a taste of that world. Yeah, that was ridiculous. That wasn't just, they were just no, just being boring, just be as boring as humanly possible

so people skip over the app. And they would want us to, they want us to fit so much in like, hey, 30 second ad read, fit in this paragraph and a half. Yeah, yeah. And I'm like,

what the fuck? Bullshit. I'm like, what do you expect this? I made literally do one. They would give you like stats to read or something. It's like, we sold.

How, how are, and it's like, nobody cares about that. I guess 16 to 90 seconds is impossible for all the information. I would be like, Lily, you got to do this one. She's like, it's like, it's not that hard. I'm like, all right, you do it. And she's like, oh, this kind of sucks. Speaking Spanish or fast, blah, blah, blah, blah. If she spoke Spanish, it would be go quicker action.

Yeah, it would be like, funny saying in Spanish. She's like, I have to translate it to Spanish now. It's like, yeah. That'd be great. But yeah, it's, it's, that's the world. Hopefully, I would just love to get to a point where we can talk to somebody specific. Like, there was. There was a guy that my channel is dead.

My main channel is, I don't use it. I put out an update saying I'm going to start using. I haven't done yet. But I lied. I lied a little bit. But this guy, he wanted to keep working with me. And I kept telling him, hey, can I, can we take this business over to the podcast? There's actually views on this thing.

And then it could actually be put into our thing. You think it would make sense. It would make sense. sense and he's like oh I think I'd rather just not yeah and I asked them and I was like dude I don't I don't know I know you don't need to give me these numbers but how many sales could I be making at this point where my views are getting less than 10,000 videos they don't want to do that because then they'd have to pay us more but even not that much but they would make that much more they would make they would make so much more it's so silly because I actually stand by their their quality

they've had many designs that I'm like I love these shirts unironically Like, I'm not lying. Well, I don't lie in my eyes. I think the only time I've ever felt a little bit disingenuous is, I don't care. Like, I didn't, I don't need a website. So Squarespace when I was doing their thing.

I never, I don't need a website. I don't have, for me personally. Yeah. But now as doing the merch thing, actually it would be great to you. But at the time,

I'm like, yeah, this is cool. It's all there. But personally, I don't go fuck. Yeah. I think I did like a mobile game thing once.

I can remember something to want to stop out. I did a mobile game thing once where like, I was like, I don't know. just see if I could do a commercial for a video game, I think. That's interesting. But, uh, yeah, it was a pretty good one, I think. It was like one of my favorite ones.

But that was, yeah, I don't know. Yeah. Anyway, people didn't believe me when I did raid, but I showed them like, Nicky, look at my account. No, yeah, you actually play. I play. I play, I play often. I was like, look, my account's maxed out. And I thought that would give us a good relationship.

But again, the suits are so stupid. I was like, hey, guys, I have gotten people to probably stick around for a long time. There's people in my clan from when I first advertise. And I'm like, you guys don't have any retention from if you reach out to, like, say, some of the bigger creators have a million subscribers. There's no going to mean like almost no retention. They'll maybe download it. And then they'll fucking stop playing after like three days. And I was like, hey, people trusting me for actually showing you, let me show you how to actually play this game.

Let me show you how to avoid the gosh mechanics and not get fucked in the ass. And, you know, but whatever. They didn't see me as any value. Before you do that, we have a word from our sponsor. Seaman It's stored In the balls Subscribe to Seaman

Thank you That's our That's our sponsor That was great Yeah thanks to Sevan for sponsoring us Thank you so much The Punisher The Punisher just showed up

And Daredeubleborn again And it was actually fucking awesome What'd you say? Why did you make sure Okay spoilers Six spoilers Yeah what the hell Well you

It was pretty apparent that it was coming back It was advertised excessively. I didn't watch any of it. I specifically had been on Media Blackout because I wanted to get an authentic experience. Yeah, shut the fuck up. I'm watching. That's funny.

Die. Die. Die twice. But, um, but. I'm watching Marvel's Punisher right now. Buncher. I'm being, but Punisher.

I'm still trying to finish agents as a shield. I finished. I watched that whole show. You watched. You watched. You watched. You watched that show? He did.

Dude, there was a few. There was a season that was really good. and then it was like, man, then it turned into complete shit. I was like, this is bad. I couldn't be that nerd that was, that worked with Nick Fears, I couldn't be bothered.

Who Colson? Yeah, I love Phil Colson. Fuck him, dude. That guy sucked. I like Phil Colson. They always have to, like, it's why I like, oh my God, I forgot his name,

the main guy in, oh my God, in, you must really like him. It's just It's one of those things The guy who invincible Yes What's the Cecil?

Thank you Cecil's Fury It got like But in a way that I'm like This is The The Cole or whatever Cole is cool

Phil Colson Phil Colson It was so Disney-esque He's no Cecil He's definitely a He's also not Walton Gagins Which also doesn't help It's true

Yeah It's Every Walton Goggins Is doing a good job is great. He's kind of killing it right now, actually. He's been on an All-Star run for a little while.

It's weird because I didn't, honestly, we just forgot. Didn't know, well, I didn't know he existed before, hear me out. Before, I can't think, so if I go back and watch some stuff, I might be like, oh shit, Walton Goggins. It probably will happen. You better not see before fall out.

You know what's crazy? No, no, what the fuck? Hold that, hold that thought. Yeah. I was watching Gremlins. And you know who's in Gremlins? Who? Fucking young Jonathan Banks.

So like a Mike Irman Trout. He plays one of the cops. Oh, yeah, because he always plays a cop. That's right. Yeah, and I was just like, bro, he looks old still. He's like, what are you doing, Grimblins, cooking meth? He was probably 30.

He looked like a rough 30, man. I want a cut of it. Cooking meth, Goblin. Look at his gremlin. We were fine. We were fine. Until you came here. And you and your pride.

and your ego and then it cuts Oh shit Oh my It's a gremlin He thought he was not gonna walk And he's like And he's like, wait, that's the future I'm here not

Wait Walter You and your pride Oh that's a gremlin That's a gremlin Shit I didn't know these things existed It shoots him in the chest

Those gremlins were terrorists They were terrorists Yeah, they were. They were. Anyway, yeah, so you see Walton Goggins in old stuff and you recognize it. Oh, oh, so the first role I ever saw him in, or at least where I recognize him pretty significant because he stood out in Sons of Anarchy as a trans woman, like a, like a. Oh, yeah, that's right. And a TIG or who's like, he was like the crazy guy.

So of Anarchy is actually a really fucking good show. Oh, it's a great show. It's like, it's one of those shows. It just falls off, like twice. I got to say the second. a show revolves or anything revolves around a motorcycle. I'm immediately disinterested. It's like the same thing with that game,

days gone. Yeah. You remember that? You, we are completely in sync right now. Yeah. In that way, because I just refuse to play it.

It's hard to play. Dude, it's like $12 right now. And I'm like, nope. I'm never, I'm never playing that game. I just see this fucking retard on a motorcycle like, nope,

nope, can't do it. That's unnecessary. He's a feller. I just, I have such a thing. I didn't like the way the zombies work. the hell of like zombies, somebody who just kind of hordes and you just leave them. Oh.

I'm, whatever. That game is weird. I don't know. I couldn't be. It's fine. I'm sure. I'm sure it's fine. I'm sure I'd actually have a little bit of fun.

I just don't care. But, um, anyway. So under Anarchy, it's one of those shows that like, you probably think like, oh, man, this is going to be trash. It's going to be stupid. It's a good. Fuck, it's good. It made me fall in love with Ron Perlman much more.

Oh, he's in that show. Yeah, he's like, he's Clay. Clay sucks. But he's such a good character, though. He's a good character. That's the whole point, asshole! That's the whole point! He's a demon.

I was like, this guy is... The worst person in that shows their mom. The mom in that shows the devil. She's great. Fucking Peggy Bundy. Oh, really? Yeah. Her really?

Yes. Oh, shit. She aged well. Good for her. She looks great. She looks fucking fantastic. Well, that was also 14 years ago. Yeah.

But like, dude, even at that... Whatever. All the stuff, do the beef with... She was 12. The Mayans. The beef with Jackson. The son. and then the fucking the baby mama

and the baby mama beefing with Katie Seagal the mom. Dude, it's I can't recommend that show more. Didn't they do a sequel series? There's me. Yeah, there's uncles of anarchy. I didn't like it. Guys, look at my watch. What does it say? It's something horrible.

Did you crack your watch? How did that happen? I broke this shit a while ago, but it's hanging on. How'd you do that? I don't know. that is a crazy brain. His watch is significantly broken and he has no idea how he did it.

One time I was, literally one time I was here, I had it in my book bag when I put my mic in, I went home and I was like, oh, it's broken. No, I don't believe you at all. You must have been robbed,

thrown in front of a car, and then Will Smith came and flashed you with that Ben and Black thing and made you forget. Because that's crazy. Oh, whatever. Holy shit. Hey,

Walton Kong, as I remember specifically, like the first time I noticed him was in Hateful Eight. because he's in the hateful eight I can't remember exactly he's in the beginning he's the racist

that's the racist that's still everything but you see how interesting that is that's still pretty late because Sonsor Anarchy was before that

right no I wasn't really aware of him that's why I'm like But he's been around for fucking I think he's been in Seinfeld too if I'm not going to say He's been in like comedies He's clearly an older actor Yeah yeah

I mean his hairlines It's crazy It's very crazy See that video of him mewing at the demon No Do you know that video? What do you mean? It's a it's a

like a clip of like some show or movie was he in Constantine? No you go I think it was Constantine I was trying to remember trying to help you remember I know it's just such an easy it's only anytime that opportunity presents itself to me I'm going to take it

it's great I think it was constant he was in I think it was maybe I don't know but like it's there's a clip of like he turns and there's like a demon and then he goes he does this face it's impossible to replicate me and just turns around.

It's crazy. Let me find it. Yeah. Because it is a crazy. Maybe it's from that. If you're talking about a demon and that's a constantian, it makes sense. It's fucking impossible. Walton Huggins.

This is such a fucking wild. Walton Goggins has a Huggins. He was in a show called a, Slob my Noggins. He was in another FX show. I can't remember what it was called, but apparently it was really good. Mind freak. He played the, he played the magic.

He's the magic. Holy shit. He goes, he's really good. He says, it's me the magic. It's me. He played the freak. I guess we got to look up his, I was going to say, dysography. His IMDB.

He had a fucking freeform jazz album in 2017. You know what? He probably did. Walton Goggins mewing. Mew. Let's see, IMD-B. Ew. Pokemon.

Yeah. Wait, wait, it's a fucking, it's a comedy, of course. He's done so much. I've seen that movie To see his filmography Get out of here And I'm not going to become a Premium member

So look So if you Google If you go on YouTube and search Walt and Gaggin's mewing It's it should be the second result After the green screen meme cut out But it's vice principles Acid Absorbed Through Skin Scene

And so this is Derek look at this Look at this face This iconic face Wait What is it that mean? Isn't that crazy? That was so many emotions in like two seconds.

I love that scene. There was one emotion where he was like turned on. At one point it was kind of like, hmm, and then... I love the turn that, like, it's such a crazy... He's a great actor. I really, I'm a big fan of Walton Gagans now. He's clearly a thespian. Yeah, he's clearly very good.

I've seen the photos of him like he did like a GQ thing or something like that where he's like he shirtless or whatever and his hairline is hilarious. It's nuts. Like it looks good on him somehow. Like it works for. for his character. He wears it well. But, like, that, that hairline is fucking bewilder.

That's like a black, that's like a Betty hairline for fucking Kung Pal. It's so, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, actually, it just looks so jarring because of how I'm more than guggins. What? Yeah. I'm watering my gaggans. I'm watering my gaggons. So what else has he been in?

What's, uh, so, it's his filmography. Yeah, so I went to, I put in his filmography and they went into his I and DB Pro and they're like, you can't look at it unless you remember. That's so sight Everything is piecemeal monetized now It's fucking crazy It's so fucking horrible All right

Jesus Christ I'm on the regular IMDB now answers to your questions Say for Google Plus To get a Do you remember that? Absolutely Well it's not now anymore

But like it used to be It was the competitor of Facebook Oh I remember that Yeah Terrible idea They made it They forced it on YouTube accounts I remember that

Do you remember? Yes God what a dark time It was Fucking Google Plus. Everybody had like, I want to add you to my top fucking, my Google circle or whatever the fuck it was. All right.

I'm trying to see his earliest stuff. He was in Passion of the Christ. As the cross. Were you really? That was, yeah. Murder, Mississippi. Didn't you? Beverly Hills 9-0-210.

He was in Beverly Hills. I wonder what the fuck he did. He must have been a teacher. He was the nine. He was the hell of us. He's just a bunch of inanimate shit. It's like the person. the kid in the school play that you castes like the tree the tree yeah yeah but he was so successful

at those roles everybody was like damn he kept succeeding as the tree and he went far in life with it the next karate kid he's in a karate kid movie yeah and the 94 and that was the one with that the slut there was like a girl oh yeah yeah anyway no we're not done i know that we didn't answer your question yeah yeah who cares about like which actor would we put in like any piece of media or long gaggagins well well Walt and Gaggans, I want Walton Goggins as every Muppet. As every, yeah,

specifically in the Gonzo movie. Oh, I love that movie. Well, I liked that movie. He played the 1,000 corpses. He played a lot of, oh,

he was in the Shield. That was another FX show that was actually really good. Yeah, he was in FX darling for a little bit, I guess so. Criminal Minds was in criminal mind. Okay, so I'm seeing a recurring theme. CSI Miami.

Criminal. He was a criminal. So it's funny. Either criminal or copper mode. He's been doing a lot of, low-key things. That's why we didn't notice him. He was in fucking 20-cent predators. Cowboys and aliens. I didn't

see that stupid movie. Yeah. He was in Lincoln, 2012. Django, this is when he started getting some better. Ew, G.I. Joe retaliation. See, it's kind of like machete kills. He was in, I guess he was in an episode of community. Oh, yeah, that's right. He was the guy who, uh, when Pierce

died. He was the guy who showed up to like read the will. Oh, no shit. Yeah, I remember. That's what I, that's the comedy thing that I was trying to remember. Ah. Yeah, he was community, then he gets drunk at the end. Okay. It's interesting. So yeah, he's been in a lot of like low-key stuff. That's why, that's why I guess we're all kind of like, oh, this guy

just seemed like he just showed about nowhere almost. Yeah, he's a great actor. I like him a lot. He's great in fallout. And, uh, I want to see him in Big Bang theory. He's good as Cecil. He's in episode. I know, you'll never believe his role in Big Bang Theory. Oh, you know why I know this? I have no idea why I know this. I've never seen,

I've never seen a full episode of the show. I think I was literally, I just happened to be scrolling. And I saw, I scared the shit out of me I haven't to be scrolling And I saw the clip You'll never fucking guess what it is So the I guess

He plays a cuck What? Stop it! Shut up! All right, geez No, just like I closed YouTube and it's opening up On a short or whatever I like the idea of the audio listeners

Thinking that you said that to me I know I did I totally But no The um Yeah so he plays a cuck Essentially

where like the Indian one I don't know their names Raj. I don't know any of crazy that he knows Of course his name is Raj. It is. So the Raj is Sandeep I don't like it but I've seen it Isn't that the same?

Raj, Taj Sandeep Rajesh was the fucking Robb Leslo Shva Dalcim He goes Leslo

Laslo Laszlo Not a real name Dalcim is I mean That's a thing I mean I mean the big bank theory Leslo

Rahu fucking The Dalcum is just as common as the name Muhammad I want to name my son Laslo. Shut the fuck out. No, you're not.

Such a fucking crazy. Laslo? Laslo? There's a L and his Z in there. And when your kid dangling from a ceiling fan is going to be your fault. Whatever.

7. 11. Cut the 711 and killed himself with the Slurpee. He killed him with the Slurpy. He's so fucked up. Because that Rensensens the stumpy machine.

Everybody's got to want Slurpees anymore. What the fuck? You've ruined this story. You know that, right? Laslo. He had a bad go. Of his own life, because he had a name that sucked.

He had a bad goal. I don't know. I couldn't think of anything else that rhymed with Liza. But so it's a hard name to say fast. But so in the episode, he plays this guy. Like, so Raj, I guess, sleeps with his wife, I guess. But he doesn't know or something. And so, like, Walton Gagans comes in.

He's like, you sleep with my wife? And he, like, he has, like, a whole fucking thing. It's like a cowboy in it or something? Huh? Do you sleep with my life? Not really. Is he like a ghoul or? What does he look like?

I mean, he's just a guy. He's feral of this one. No, he's not a guru. Oh, I'm sorry. I think I'm getting the shows mixed up. Yeah, it's not animated. Or like a puppet show. He's not a feral ghoul.

No, no, he's not. Anyway, I'm sorry, help. I really don't know what else. I don't have anything. Sorry. No, go ahead. No, like, he's struggling. Why does it say this?

I don't know. My thing. My search engine says, Walton's Christmas bug bang and I don't know how it did that. I don't know, man. I swear I put in Walton Gaggins Walton

I'm pretty sure this is what I typed in Walton Gagin's Big Bang Theory and it said Walton's Christmas bug bang I don't know man you're talking to somebody with the less information than you in fact about this I'm scared how that I see that Indian guy like oh don't touch my gutty and then he's like

yeah you did that Don't touch my curry wife. That's my curry man. You watch street food with my hands. So crazy hands you curry. It's a stupid show. I swear I thought they were called. I swear I thought they were called acidic Jews rodan.

He says sub-chocolate. Acidic? Yeah. That's what I thought too when I was a kid, to be honest. As a kid, probably. Because Hasidic is never, you never running into that word. It doesn't sound good. It sounds.

It doesn't sound real either. It sounds like. What the fuck is acid It doesn't What is acid? Yeah What is acid? Anyway Anyway

Anyway Uh Yeah whatever They were running He says sub chocolate Hazelnut and salt What's your favorite Ingame lore

Explanation for a mechanic Within said video games Ooh I like that That's a great one In Lefer Dead 2 In order to prevent Players from camping

As the tank Players must do damage To a survivor Within a limited time Otherwise they will die The ingame Explanation as to why That happens to the tank

is that since the tank's body is working overtime, both physically and mentally, after a while, the tank will die from a heart attack caused by excess amount of rage due to not being able to find its target. That's awesome. That's awesome. That's true. I forgot about that. That there was like you couldn't camp as the tank. I guess you had like a time. That was definitely a patched in afterwards, right?

No, no, that was always. They thought of that before? I think so. They definitely played tasted that. They definitely playtasted that. And they were like, we got to take the job. That was back when they would playtest things effectively. So they actually did it?

That was back when they made games and, like, finish them. Do you understand how fucking crazy it is that my mind went to that immediately? I know. You assume that, like, oh, that's a good idea. It must not have been there at launch. That's crazy. It's so sad. The state of everything.

No one plays testing of everything. No one plays test anything. No one does quality insurance on anything anymore. Well, they're getting rid of quality assurance now. They're just doing it all with AI now. Oh, that's right. A lot of layoffs in the games industry, a lot of is QA, which is, by the way, the entry-level position into that industry.

So like that industry is fucked. Right. I tried to do that for a guitar hero. Oh, did you really try to get into that? Yeah, I tried to get into that because they were. That sounds awesome. They're holding it all in Santa Monica. And, uh, but I guess I wasn't good enough on the expert level.

They want, basically you need to be able to beat the game like with no problems. Right. And I, expert, I wasn't, I wasn't. Yeah, I think I have like maybe three songs I could do on expert. Yeah. And that was like back, no shot I could do them today. No, fuck no. No.

I was playing on hard, uh, maybe like a year ago. And I was having, I was struggling. I was struggling. I was struggling. fucked up. We were like, I gotta put this down. I was Ballad of Buster struggling over there, man. Yeah. Really was, really was bad.

But no, one of my favorite, one of my least favorite actually, I should say, but it's my favorite because I hate it so much, is the explanation for why Master Chief's armor looks different when they switch developers is nanobots. Oh, well,

nanomachines. But they just redesigned as art. They were like, this looks lame. They took it upon themselves. are like, hey, hey, cunt, I don't want this. And they're like, too bad. Yeah. Yeah, it really, it literally was like, we have a different art style, so we want to do that. And like, how do we explain this?

Uh, nanomachines. And also, nanomachines redesigned everything also. Like, everything else outside of the pod that he was in. Just like, oh, the way that ships and buildings look, nanomachines. I think that's so insane to change a character's design like that for no reason. It never works. His design is so not necessary to change. he's man in armor.

It's like changing SpongeBob. It never works. Or something. It's like, why are you doing that? It never works. Like, okay, so for the kids show it could work because the kids are mainly watching it, sure. But for- No, but dude, even I remember like American Dragon Jake Long.

That show was- And they did redesign SpongeBob, to be fair. And when they did, they did redesign him, I remember being like, I don't like this as much. Right, but when he was like more angular. Yeah. You remember that? You know what I mean? As an adult, you can definitely appreciate and like, hey, what the fuck?

Well, this sucks. Right. Comparatively. As a kid, they probably were like, whatever. Right, right. But yeah, but this is for a rated end video game. And they're like, as if like the people would notice. I've never seen it work where people are like, I like this better.

And it's not that it might even be technically better. It's just I fell in love with this original design. It's iconic. I'm weird because I exist in a place where I read comics and all they do is read this. They have so many. Yeah. Spider-Man's had so many fucking costumes. Spider-Man looks different in every panel of every fucking book.

Spider-Man. There are the variety of Spider-Man costumes that exist within the Spider-Man single actual run is insane for the regular costume. Like they change his costume so much. I personally love the original Spider-Man costume. Right. With the webs.

The web arm? The web arm? Well, with web arms and webs on his arm quite little. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. I think that is a perfect costume. But, like, I've seen the spider have six legs sometimes. I've seen it be skinny. I've seen that.

I love the original OG little fat spider in the back. A little fat one looks like a tick almost. Yeah, that's like a spider at all. I like that one too. That's the classic one. But there's so fucking many. They've changed the symbiote costume so many times in my life. But I'm like, what the fuck?

Because I remember first, it was like the, it's a dragon now. But it was the fucking big spider. It was, it's, it's a spider. It's a spider. It's a spider, I guess. But like, it used to be the spider here and the, and the watcher all the one in the back, right? The relatively same symbol. But now it connects.

Both of the feet from back and front connect to the body. I think that looks cool still. Oh, that was the one that I remember being the original. That's not the original one. Oh, that's crazy. Yeah, I remember the, because I had action figures. Yeah. Where, like, it connected around the back.

Yeah. And the big spider has the little one in the back. Now they both connect each other about the same size. And they have the white palms. Some of them not the white palms, right? Or not palms. I know what you mean. I know what you mean.

And I like, I dislike Ramey's costume design a lot because it doesn't really look like the black suit too much. It is a good costume. Oh, the black. Yeah. It is a good costume. It's not a good black symbiote. But it's a good black Spider-Ramee costume. I actually think it would look a lot better if the spider was just.

white. Like I don't, like, the fact that the spider isn't white is weird. You know what I mean? I think it would show up well. Maybe not. That's not how you everybody says it would have well. I do like the spider design for it though. It looks like the spider on the back of his regular.

It looks crazy. Yeah. But like it's, but you can't see it because it's like kind of lost in the. It's, yeah, that's true. Yeah. I've always been like a, I don't know. I like Srami's original suit a lot. I think it is really, really well done.

And I'm like, this looks really, really cool. I think that, I think the Tasum II suit is the best one. The best one. The best. live action suit that I've seen. Well, yeah, it's it's a shame that movie is fucking dog water ass pussy garbage shit. That's a crazy movie. That movie has

some moments that like, this is a really good moment. Then it immediately gets raped by every of the moment afterwards. It really is crazy. It's like a line, it's like a firing squad. You like line up for this movie and then you just can't stop you just can't stop seeing things

crumble and die. Like the moment where he does like the backflip and he like saved the people with like the one I'm like, that's really cool. And immediately something stupid happens. And I'm like, why? Why did you undercut that? It's so weird that they got Jamie Fox to do that. I wonder what the hell happened.

You did Ray. You sing real good. You want to be an electric? You're really talented. You want to be electric. You're funny. Your singing voices downright, dare I say electric. As he's chewing a brick like gum.

Oh, fuck. I love that scene where the. fucking electricity fixes the gap in his teeth. It's such a great scene. Did you see that? That's real, by the way. I don't remember that. That's real.

I do not remember that. I'm not making that up. If you go to the electro transformation scene from Amazing Spider-Man too, like there's a C-Ware-It up right now. Look it up right now. They make a point. They make a point to zoom in on his mouth to show his teeth fix it. Like, hey.

Yeah, just so you know, this is why he looks different now. There is no amount of truth to get. fix my teeth. No. It could be a thunderstorm and I'm a fucking lighting rod. Your teeth really aren't that like I don't really understand what people were talking about really. I didn't notice you got a tooth gap until they pointed it out. And even now I'm looking at it and I can't really see it. It's not bad. It's a song on but it must be easy to floss. Yeah. Also what I drink soup

and it spills out. When I drink soup it spills out sometimes. I can't drink soup. You know the first time when that movie came out I saw somebody online say like the fuck what is this homeless like Dr. Manhattan bullshit and I it never I was like that you ruined the movie for me already

He ruined it for me immediately or I was like I can't take them seriously anymore Because in regular one obviously we know Max Dillon is absolutely not a black blue person He's black and blue But in the ultimate universe he's blue He's like pure electricity. Black and blue black and blue

Black and blue All right so of the craziest villains that he has Like, Electro is such a terrifying level of power. It's a lot. I remember I liked him a lot in the MTV show. The emphasis on it fixing is so stupid. It is crazy.

Yeah, like, they show it. They're like, hey, he's no longer ugly anymore. He's not a stupid nerd with a gap. Now he's just blue and a freak. Now he's a blue schizophrenic. Like, he basically traded his tooth gap for like that deformity. Looking way worse. Like he's like, would you rather have a tooth back?

Would you rather? Crazy question. Would you rather have a tooth gap or be blue? Be blue and weird and gross. Blue. Where people would look at you and freak out now. Yeah. Because that's...

I like Max Dillon in the MTV show that they did for a little bit. I think he's a really cool character. Because he was scary in that show. You remember the one that was animated? Yeah. It was like 3D. And Neil Patrick Harris, I think, was Spider-Man in that. And like, like, Electoral, I remember being terrifying in that show.

Because he was like literally like pure electricity. And he was like hauntingly scary. I love him. I love Mac Dylan because he's has a really insane power, but he's stupid. So it's funny because he's actually way more dangerous. Yeah, he could. Like how much power he has. He's nerfed by how dumb he is.

Maybe he just lashes out when he can really hurt people. She's like Adam Eve. Her character's so stupid. Her powers are so stupid. Oh, well. Walls. No, her character. I mean, I like the idea of, I mean, I wish I had that power.

It would be fucking amazing. I mean, I like the idea of her being. I like the idea. idea of it's like you want to talk about like rules or so like her being nerfed to where she doesn't have unlimited power you know like they they specifically nerfed her to uh to make sure that she doesn't just fix everything like literally yeah do whatever she wants i think her character is really cool but i think she's really wait you'll see it gets she has some moments that are so stupid well they're doing different stuff with the show now so like that's that's true then the

comics so like i don't know yeah i'm only i'm catching up on it now i'm only i'm on the middle season two or whatever. I know everything that happens. I like where we are now finally. It does. This season was really good. This was very, very good. It took a while. They, they hammered at home pretty a lot in the season about like how much of a pussy mark is. And he finally realizes that at the very end where he's like, I can no longer be a pussy anymore. Where it's just like the idea of, you know, the stereotypical superhero of like, I can't kill. Right. I can't kill.

And it's like, that's not realistic. And then so, finally, he's like, I can't do that anymore. He's like, that's... Yeah, you're just killing other people, man, like, not killing him. Quite literally, yeah. Yeah, like, and he's like, I can't, like, and so like, finally, he's finally where he needs to be. I'm like, where this, what is this, like, nobody actually believes that. I understand Batman is insane.

So I understand him with having that code. Sure, yeah. He's insane. He's an insane person. I think it works for characters, but... You don't just kill someone that automatically makes you a bad person. But that's all the way that, like, comic. It works for depending on how the characters work.

You know, like, Spider-Man stopping burglar is more often than not. Like, he has villains that are like, if you kill a burglar. He'll try to kill carnage. It just won't work. Yeah. If he killed a burglar, it was more of like, look at Batman, I give him a pass because he's crazy. I don't give him a pass. I think he's crazy.

Like, I, like, it tracks. It makes sense that somebody would be that incongruent with himself. Right. Because he's crazy. Obviously all nuts he is. He's absolutely out of his mind. but it's like, I'm not going to do it. Everybody in the league is like,

no. No, Robin. If I kill this pedophile with how many rapes under his belt, four million. I'll be just as bad as him. No better than that would be no better than I. I might as well, in fact, if I kill him now, I might as well go rape 45,000.

I'm going to start raping you right now, Robin. And Dick Bracson's like, I'm going to go to Blood Haven. I'm out of the city. That's like those people who are like, Without God, I would kill people. And it's like, yeah, 100%. That shit's alarming. You are a psychopath.

That shit is alarming. Without God, there's no morality. It's like, what are you saying? So crazy. It is, it is absolutely, like, you're outing yourself and you don't realize how much you're outing yourself because they think everybody else thinks like them. That's so crazy. Yeah.

Like, oh, that guy's a sociopath. I have nothing holding me back, dude. I just don't want to do it. Right. I don't want to just straight up murder being. We don't have to fight your urge. You don't have to fight your urge to dunk a baby. in a fucking Vitamix?

You don't put puppies in boiling pots of water and put the lid on it? You don't have a fiending urge to just bite the face off of people? You're not possessed. You're not possessed with the thought of shoving your head up a pregnant woman's vagina and just eating the baby while it's in your health. Jesus Christ. The cervix. That is fucking wild.

Anyway, we're gonna do the last question and then we're gonna get the fuck out of here. Yummy. I can feel my head starting pound. Halo, the master bait collection. Nice. I mean, have you seen Cortana wrote? And this is not really a question so much.

It's just like, I just want to end on this because I think it's funny. I'll be honest. I had never heard of hereditary until Derek started shitting on it. So honestly, I'll just take his word for it. that was a good one I love that

that is great it's a good I think there's gonna be these motherfuckers like no watch it no it's a masterpiece oh man

I love I absolutely love what that turn it to it's great yeah it's a good meme and it's a good a little meme my guy

bought it for me and I was like that is funny perfect ending it was like a yeah it's a good little bow on have you seen Kanye

West going off on Jay Z's family last night no I don't pay attention to Kanye fan of Kanye. I don't pay attention to him. He's such an asshole.

Wait, has anyone ever seen Jay-Z and Beyonce's younger kids? They're retarded. No, like literally, this is why artificial insemination is such a blessing. Having retarded children is a choice. If Twitter take my shit down, then so be it. But I need y'all to know Jay-Z

or nobody have no power over me. What does that mean? So the point of that tweet... He just gets a frantic, I guess. Was to be like, yeah, I'm not afraid to say some horrible. shit about Jay-Z. Yeah, Jay-Z, come get me.

His kids are retarded. I have not- What are you going to stick the Yankees on me? I actually haven't. What is, I actually love. Oh, more? Read it out. So I need everyone to know that I took down the post about Jay-Z.

Hold on, hold on. About Jay-Z and Beyonce's family down and Jerry Lorenzo's family down because, Jesus Christ, fuck, his grammar's crazy. Because there was a possibility of my Twitter being canceled, not because I'm a person. I took it down. What? I took it down like down.

I took it down like down syndrome. Get it. Am I right? Am I right? Fuck the world. Real talk and then a massive gap. Fuck everybody. It's going to be so funny when he dies.

He's just lost all of his cashier. There's going to be parties. He has, he's burned all his will. There's some people holding on a little bit. He's psychotic. There's a couple of people holding on. Who?

If I'm gone, it should be, like, if I'm getting off the boat. Hey, you know, who's holding on a little bit? That creator deleted. Now, he's, he's, now, now, to be fair to him, he is acknowledged how bad he's, you know, he's acknowledged all the fucked up shit he's doing, but he's still, he won't join the rest of the same world than just being like, like, I'm done with this dude entirely. Like, uh, look, I get it. He made, if we lose.

He made some music that's really important to me, but also the person. that made the music is not there. He's not there. He's gone. Like, he's not present anymore. He's gone. You can't ask you a question.

Yeah. Let's say like hypothetically, like, knock on wood, right? We lose the audio, right, to this episode. I'm not saying that I think that this is happening. I just looked over and just imagined like a horror scenario. Do we just post the video of us laughing with no sound?

Might as well. The whole video is like, like a commentary track almost like this is when we started talking about this. We just go on this point and report another one. That's crazy. That's crazy. No one's ever done that before, I think. No.

We'd be breaking... Breaking new ground. We'd be breaking bad, yeah. Baking, breaking... Anyway, you're gonna read the $25.00 and our patron names now. You can go over to patreon.com slash the Stark Tank. Jesse, I avoided an explosion. I exploded a fucking building and I was fine.

And you could donate that amount of money and then I'll read your name. Jesse. I did 9-11, because it was me. It was me the whole time, Jesse. I'm the reason why CIA and FBI I was in every plane, Jesse. It was me. I hit both towers and I hit the Pentagon.

I'm the one who knocks on a twin towers and blows him. It's me. I've been Friza the whole time. It's been Friza. That's how I did it. You don't understand this. Deathball, Jesse, watch. Crazy.

All right. Why are you doing this, Mr. W? Count me down. Mr. Wye. Mr. Wye! Mr. Wye! 321. Mr. Friza.

No, I want. Let me get more Christian Ritter. Pussy, Mr. White. Wait, that's the wrong one. No, you're right. Christian Ritter? Yeah, Kristen Ritter. Okay, for some reason, that sounded wrong tone.

No, no, no, yeah. Okay. Just more pussy of her, Mr. White. Hold on. What's... What is it? Is it... Is it...

Pussy? Pussy what? Tell me what. I love that fucking shot. What's crazy is that like... Kohl Shedra Edress. They could do that in the beginning of Dragon. Like, Sphisa could do that at one finger so early.

And people were like, oh, I think... I think fucking Omni-Mibair could kill Freezing. And it's like, dude, this thing goes blowing. I don't know if Aanyman can. I know A man could kill everybody on the planet, but I don't know if he can destroy planets. Yeah. He can definitely destroy. Can he destroy planets?

They destroy a planet later on, but it's three of them. Three of them. Three of them. But like, that's at once. I feel like he could just, can he. I mean, you can progressively destroy a planet events. Like, does he hit? I think he could destroy a planet in five minutes.

No, but I mean, like, does he, because can he one shot a planet like Friza? No. Yeah, that's what I was saying. Friza can one shot a planet without effort. Like, it looks... That is true, but how durable is it? Because that's also a different thing, too. Like, he could be strong enough.

But this is not about Dragon Ball. Dragon Ball characters, they have, they have proclaimed durability, but they never really get hit with these... Whoa, no, Friza tanks an explosion of a planet. Fine, right, but... Actually. Right, but Friza also gets cut in half by a destructo disc that krillin throws. You know what I mean?

Like, there's strength in those durability, and those are separate things. Freezer is very strong, but he's not as durable as he is strong. I guess... You would have... You would assume so, right? It's a destructive dance. I guess Friza is the ultimate glass cannon. Because the thing is this right, because no defense whatsoever.

Because I remember later on, it doesn't work on sell at all. That's what I'm saying. That's true. So, yeah. But then you'd assume by that point, the destructive damage, right? Destructive ability, right? By the time he shows back up in Super, it's been what, 20 years. And he's as strong as Goku is at that moment.

Like, he's comparable to Goku at that moment. Sure, but is he, whatever. So I think you'd assume. Destructo. dick ah Curling grows to a regular size person

and then he shrinks back in his dick accumulates all the mass he relinquishes so his dick just gets big like a big like trunks his fucking sword that's so disgusting

and that's it and it's like glowing radiating energy and he's like but that's it and that's it there's no point to make

he's sacrifice his wife Macombie. Playing, Chats are exploding on Stone Cole Steve Austin's back who's cosplaying as Napa racist Hokage

Sleep and when Patreon Sleeping when Patreon auto starts the podcast Kiss my nuts and suck my ass too. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Very cool.

I am going to kill the president with a mortar. That colon is Excelsior. Go him! Go, go. That form of transmutation is so hilarious. He just become a full-sized man.

He like gets empty like that girl in the weed commercial on the couch. Yeah. But his dick is fucking solid. It's all this mass. Growing as a person, then shrinking back, then your dick growing all the excess space, and then dying. I'm jealous of how big grillens.

Dick is. Yeah. I will not let you destroy my friends. D. And your resume. Oh, my God. Yeah. Goku, I shoved on the dragon balls up my urethron.

I have all the dragon. Wait, watch this. Well, what is it? What is it? Come over. Well, Kreland. That's amazing. That's amazing.

Fucking Wallace. Wallace is a dynamic for some reason. That is a crossover. That's amazing. I'll hand them over. It's the dark Lord Fraser. All right. I'm getting on mugging, dude.

I'm going to fucking. What am I looking at? I don't know what I'm saying. Who is? Oh, it took me a second. I didn't realize. That is a fucking Roershack test. Is this, is this, is this canon?

So for those of you who are fucking listening to the show right now, because Kingston loves to show fucking media to the screen silently. Who did that? It's an animation of Invincible and Conquest Fighting, but it's with their dicks and balls. Who did that? I have no clue. It doesn't say who.

I didn't really understand what I was seeing for a second. It's not a safe. It did say what it. It did say who. He just doesn't care. He just doesn't want to give credit. He's not a fucking artist. Yeah.

Why would I give artists to credit people? They're fucking worse than me. Well, thrilling, you've done a great job. He did the great job. Let the struck the disc was genius. It's from doodle whiz. Doodle whiz? Yeah.

Thanks, Wallace. He sounds like a good. Thanks. Thanks, Wallace. My dick hurts. On account of the Dragon Ball We can wish my research back, right? I wish for cheese

For cheese More cheese than I can possibly imagine That's okay Sure Sure Fucking dumb asshole So it shall be Oh shit

How am I supposed to get all these Chains back home I wish all the cheese No I wish all the cheese was back home with me. It's like Claret Zone, where the guy asks for all the books, but loses his glasses. What do you think his power level is?

Wallace? Yeah. Five million. Trillion. Trillion. Beer's is like, I wouldn't. No, so I think, realistically, realistically, I think Wallace could take Spopovich. But that's, I think it.

They're martial artists, though. Right. but Wallace is an inventor. He could hijit his way to... He would invent a gun. He would invent a pistol. Watch this, Shinsau Abe. That's crazy.

Oh my fucking God. All right. We got a magic trick. Oh. Oh. No. It's a rifle. It's a Wallace.

It's a Wallace. Fuck. My one weakness. My one weakness. Wallace It's over for you Don't worry I'll fight Beiris

While you find the dragon balls Don't go Who's got the getaway car? Who's who's uh who's a who's uh Who's the control over there now? Uh I don't know Is it Shenzo 2?

Probably a pile of nuclear waste Over where Overware? Overware Japan You know In Nepal In general?

In Japan I don't know In that Probably I don't know Some sort of fucking Some sort of fucking some sort of fucking Hentai character

There's some anti-eligible. Nuclear waste hentai. Hentai, like, with tentacles and it's glowing and shit. Sendai. Bring me women. Anyway, I'm going to, yeah, yeah. Big milk titties. We'll call it the Gulf of Gay.

It'll be so gay. It's Emma. Two rats and a trench coat. You guys should sit in a circle and guerrilla group each other talking until they turn dark purple. Illusive Joe. Gale Gooner investigating Laura Palmer's murder. Queer Al Yank. My dick.

queer al yank my digg. I think he'd appreciate that. Yeah, if you tweeted that at him, I think he would get it. I think he would giggle. He'd be like, wow. I don't know about it. It's so funny to him.

Yeah, he can't, he busts on his accordion. It's so funny, he changes his name. Yeah, like now. This is me now. This is me now.

That was too good. I'm normal Alfred now, because that's, that's way weirder than my name. Normal Alfred's actually kind of funny. Yeah. The gate. Matrix starring Keanu Reams.

Keanu Reams and Lawrence Bitchburn, uh, berserker, Broley, Gap Shining Sweeney, the Sloker 2, Why So Derpy? Thanks to all these memes. I genuinely can't remember what J.D. Bands looks like. Shut up. Um, okay.

No, real quick before I forget. Uh, do you guys, so a few people are asking about the, doing the gay covers, uh, the ones that we wrote. And it's been like two years, two plus years and we have not recorded anything. Oh, right. So they're asking about it. So I want to run it by you. Are you guys interested in doing them now?

It depends on which one. Because like some of them just don't suit me. You know what I mean? Where I'm just like I can't do that straight up. Okay. So how about we start off with Hero? You guys down doing Hero? I can do Hero.

Yeah, that's that one. Okay. I'm going to get the instrumental. And then I'll do it. Yeah. Watch him as he gays. As he gays. You from my hero

Yeah There it goes my that one's too obvious Because it would come on the radio all the time And I'm like damn It's it But you can't you can't It can't it can't not be homo What the hell's could it be?

Yeah Unless you like suck on My queer rose A suck on my pee hole Drink come out my pee hole All right All right Thanks thanks to all these memes

I genuinely can't remember What J.D. Vance looks like Kingston's Cobracock Let the Cumbies hit my tongue Let the Cumbies hit my tongue What are you telling me that I That I What are you telling me that I can breathe?

No, George, I'm telling you that when you are ready You won't have to Sending Casey Anthony back in time to infant Trump I alone am the skullduggerous one Dono nation Vaughan of the dead Come up Come to the level up expo in Vegas

So I can get you guys to sign my bryl shirt Derek If that's this weekend I'll I might see him Derek not shove And is innocent hashtag freem round-eyed Asian sacrificing two and a half gay goats

for a snart tank d&D session feeding a baby Korean fire noodles and seeing what happens although there are hints towards a multiverse existing there isn't actual any evidence for the theory unfortunately I fuck boy butts

and I cannot lie grah take my barbed curved cock bub um weir uh uh

sweetie made me play Digimon against my will at a ditty party while Lily Watch him estimated in Spanish fuck off you're not a part of the joke fuck me slow

but make it hurt thug zill King of the Hoodsters losing all my friends in the custody battle, Kurt Cobain, POV. That's crazy. Hey and welcome to the kind of gaysist gay cast. I'm gay. Stupid. Death.

Jack the world's fastest Maori rebranding to Jack WFM to make the ending of my Patreon name jokes longer to fuck with the short one. Milk and cereal. Ooh. I should have milk and cereal. I'm hungry. I love cereal. I don't have cereal. while.

Whoa. That was weird. What's your, what's your milk a choice? My milk a choice? Yeah, what kind of milk do you use? Honestly, I, like,

I don't really have a, I just don't do real milk. Probably 2%. I don't do real milk. I'm a, I'm a vanilla almond milk, always. Almond milk's good.

A little hints of vanilla goes, yeah, man, it goes so hard. It works for almost everything. I go lactate-free, but. Lactate-free works. Lactate I use mainly. I use lactate-free,

like, well, we'll use it when we're making like pasta. We need some type of cream. We do a lactate. Exactly, yeah. It's really good for that, specifically.

Yeah. So it doubles. It's like, it's versatile. So like, I love almond milk when you, pancakes are almond milk dog. Yeah.

Oh, I never tried that. I never tried that either. My grandma would make it. I'm like, oh, man. Interesting. I never tried that.

Do you know how to make them? I'm not going to make pancakes. I told, you've seen you make pancakes before. I'm not good at that. I don't remember. I can make French toast like a demon. I can't make French.

I can make pancakes really fucking good. I'm not going to make pancakes. I don't know why. Is it a black one's the thing? It must be. I can't swim or make pancakes. I can't swim. I can't mix together.

I absolutely can swim. I'm actually negative buoyant. I sink. I'm actually like negative buoyant. I sink. You actually can't swim at all. He sings. No, I can swim. I'm great at swimming.

I just can't float. So that it makes it much harder to where I see motherfuckers like hovering. They're like, hey, I'm all nice and buoyant. I can't. See, I'm paddling my feet to stay above. I'm struggling to stay afloat. Yeah. Yeah.

So I've heard. And I don't know if these are actual scientific terms, but I know at least in the Army or in the Navy, they were like, you're buoyant or your negative buoyant? My BMI is too fucking crazy. So they're like, yeah, I have negative buoyancy. My bones are too dense. And I've heard shit like that.

I'm like, I guess. I don't know if that's actually scientific. My bones have too many dense in them. Yeah. So the waters are seeping in somehow. I'm drowning for the inside. You're absorbing the water in the water. That's possible, dude.

People actually like drown like hours later after they're like out of the water sometimes because it like it stays in their body somehow. And it's fucking crazy shit. I see people get shot and drown me. I can't remember what it's called. There's like a word for it. That's, yeah. It's awful.

Big meaty stinks. People like you in prison. My name is Jake. You guys really hurt my feelings. Fuck you. No. Gooner killed by men who twerk. Andy the man who's handy is.

And are back to S tier and forever dandy. You think you're more likely to get shot if you wear a, um, a, uh, a bullpoo vest. We smoke an unfiltered crack, you stupid piece of shit. Shimmy, shimmy, yashmi, shimmy, yashimi yashimi yashimi yam. fighting. You are kind of, yeah. You're tempting fate in some way. Uh, give me some pie because I'm dead and gay. Lost it all at the Cortez. Oh, damn, we're back up to four pages. Um, you all got, you all got some change. That's a good thing, but like I'm upset by it. He's all damn.

Oh, fuck. Uh, when Elon finally dies, catch me going to the stupid, uh, stupid in the club like Jim carries the mask. Gids, are you in or are you out of my ass? Spider-Man, Sweeney's the type of guy to float while smelling pie. Evil Kendrick be like bad kid sane city. Kennett Blacks Whistful Boing Burdened Hop Goblin 40K Fax Nice of Space Marines

Are Black salamanders I don't know What that means Kevin Durant's feet Ten cum shots I'll take them all They'll call me El Fagilado

Dr. Man Love Or How I Learn to Stop Waring And Love the Cock Fuck you I ain't paying my TV license Bitch Mr. He didn't aspire

Till October But they're fucking awful What is that Is that a Mr. Beasbar I'm putting that poison my body. Is that prime? No,

is that a prime bar? A bar prime. A bar prime. Solid prime. They take a bunch of prime. You know, I saw the other day at the fucking, you know what? I saw the other day at the at the grocery store. I saw a tricks yogurt and I thought about it.

You didn't get it? I didn't get it. Why did you not? I don't know. I just thought like. Tricks. Grine. Grine.

Fuck you want to pay my job license, bitch. Just the pants. Peeling open Derek's ass like you're putting a garbage bag over the bin. Fuckface Unstoppable. Cardboard pie, spomba fudders, jolly old dipshit. The ace of parades. Derek wears a tiny beanie on each toe. Definitive top five black people.

LeBron Keith David featured Tim Duncan Sweeney. Goatman. I'm the head of the motherfucking state N-word. I brought you change N-word. What the fuck you're thinking? N-word. Pussy pounder with cheese. It's insane.

Gabe Bart Simpson says, Eat my cock. I'm over here stroking my beetle dick. I got lotion. my beetle dick now. I'm just stroking my shit. I'm horny as fuck bug. Gay little beetles squirting at the thought of

food a rat peepee. What's up with the Beatles? I don't know. Food a rat peepee? The guys remember are beetle bords? I don't know man. I do. Big bad beetle bords. I barely remember them. That shit was stupid as fuck. It was just not Power Rangers.

Dude, there was like a guy that their Zordon was this fucking like Elvis ghost like impersonate. It made no sense. An elval ghost. Basically. Sonic fans found a way to recompile Xbox 360 games. Young Shapiro starring Lucas of Kids React fame.

Young Shapiro is disgusting. Young Shapiro, like a show? Yeah, like Young Sheldon. That's fucking great. So what would it be like a... I love being in kindergarten. In fact. In fact.

I love being a child so I can breastfeed reasonably again. Nobody looks strangely when you're seven in breastfeeding. With your seven in breastpating We'll definitely do Not that I've noticed I'm socially unaware I'm also so involved sucking and twinking the milk

From my sister Flabber I can't wait to write a script And no one wants to pick it up So I fucking become a fucking hang And fucking hack piece of shit Fucking have my own conservative think tank

I drink from my sister I drink from her I can't wait to get older My sister developed She might as well be a fucking jug Let me tell you She might as well be a goddamn Hamster fucking jug

With a little frost I was engineered my sister, so she's always an adult. I fucking crisper. I crispered my sister. Bars. Bar. I crispered my sister. I crispered my sister, mister.

Mr. Mr. Uh. I fucking, she might as well be a drug as such a... Let's play. Let's put it plainly. I crispered my sister, Mr.

My sister, Mr. That's pretty good. Can we play Twister? Sister? Can we play Twister? Can we play Twister? Can we play Twister? while listening to Twisted Sister.

Oh man, I've got blisters on my... I got blisters to play twister with my sister. Mr. The Revenge of the Sith is an amazing... The Revenge of the Sith game is amazing. Smitchie the Kid. I never played that. I never did either.

I nut, you know, we all nut for donuts. Oh, I got donuts out there too. Ichibon Kassiga says play Monster Hunter. Look at this nigga. This was basically Zordon. This was Zordon and Big Bad Beetleborgs. I'm reading. You just look at this.

What is that? This is like the Zordon of the Big Bad Beetleborch. That looks racist somehow. Wait, I don't know what it is. There is an element of blackface to it. Yeah. Even though he's blue. That's like almost like,

what the fuck is that? That's the Beetleborg's bad guy? No, this is the Zordon. He's the mentor. That's their fucking split. splinter? Yes. This is their splinter.

That looks like a fucking haunted ceramic Elvis. What the hell is that? That's exactly what it is. It's like some ghost Elvis thing.

What's his name? Flabber. I was not expecting it. Yes. Flabber. Oh my God. Beedlebor. Beetleborgs.

Beetleborgs. You know what I think I'm going to Beetleborgs. Beetleborgs. Does whatever a beetlebor. Beetlebor. Beedleborgs, Bidleborgs, don't you see he's a beetleborg.

Bidleborg. Beem, be, be, beetle borgs. I forgot that was the actual theme. Watching beetle from a borg. Look, this beetle borg's beetle borging. Beetle borging all over my borg. Bordle borg. Stop.

Bottle, me. Bordle Bordle B. Please stop. Oh, I'm beetling my borg. I'm beetling my borg. I'm beating my borg. Beetle my borg right now. God, my borg so beetles.

He's a nigga from the side. He's like, it's like Jay Leno, like, had sex with the, with the fucking Elvis ghost. That's like fucking Jay Leno became a shoehorn. It looks like Jay Leno. It looks like Jay Leno fucked blue Rosie O'Donnell. That does. That is the craziest character. That was supposed to be their best.

That was supposed to be a trustworthy figure in their life. And that's why when the show showed up, I was like, what the fuck is it? this? What is it after Power Rangers, I'm guessing? Absolutely. It was one of the ones where it's like, let's soak up everything, but the scenes where there's fighting, always Japanese shit that already existed. I'm imagining Beatleboard was the same. I hate that deeply. Yeah. Like, oh, VR troopers. Let's get some dumb teenagers and then let's just grab the Japanese shit where they're adults and pretend it's the same thing. This splice it all together. That's crazy. Post-clarity nut. That's too much for me. I want a flabber shirt.

What do you guys think? What? No. We should we flabber merch. Just a shit of this guy. That just says I'm a flabbit. Just steal someone's fucking intellectual property. It's like it's a stark tank.

Whoever made this are probably dead as fuck. You're right. Yeah. I'm sure they were thrown off a cliff at the premiere. You're some guy being like, we're here at the flabber estate. Really? A flabber estate. He's a guy.

I don't like fucking flabbit. It's like just the actor. It's not even a character design. They just found a guy who looks like this. We got to cast him. It's like, what are we going to find a guy that looks like this again? Yeah, so even people in the look totally looks like dot com, they connect the dots. Yeah, it's clearly J-Let.

It's Negoleno. It's Nega-Nagaleno. Negaleno. Does whatever Negoleno does. The opposite of what Lano does. Doesn't explode in fancy cars. doesn't roll down hills with his face leading forward. Look out.

Here comes the Negoleto. His face is fine. He's completely okay. He led Conan have the Tonight Show. He's a respected figure in comedy. No one, everybody would be sad if he died. Look out. Negoletto.

At the scene of a joke. There he is to let it happen. I don't know. There's a stroke. Lillow's gonna do Lillow's gonna he's gonna explode us dude for sure He he's suing us as we speak If I saw a Jay Leno like in real life I'd actually be a little bit like Oh shit you know I'd be a little bit nervous that like I feel like he has he has the

The vendetta he's capable of being that petty here's this insignificant podcast I feel like I would be just afraid that he would bring whatever luck is following him to like towards me That's a good point and it just like it might look like it was deliberate but it was just an accident yeah yeah yeah Yeah. He walked under like 40 ladders or something at some point. 40 ladders while breaking mirrors. It was so many ladders that he didn't. It was so many ladders in a row that he didn't realize it was ladders.

He just thought it was a hallway. Then he got to the end. He was like, Dominoes. Oh shit, those are ladders. I've got four million years of man luck. Four million. He got mirrors lined up like dominoes too for some reason.

Yeah. They just all shattered. Oh shit. My mirror wallet that I dropped. My mirror wallet. Oh my God. Stop, please. Walking on mirror row.

and I'm shattering the mirrors on me. Oh, fuck. I dropped my mirror while after I walked out of this hallway of ladders. Oh, fuck. I hope I make it to the fucking black cat zoo. The black. They're having a marathon today. I'm going to stand right in the middle of it.

So they all run past me. A black cat zoo. Need me some calcium cannons right now. Scrotocles, Harvard Tessies have her a ball. You should beg to go to that. The negotiator. I know, it's just cats. And in this, it's like a safari.

And this one's all. also black. This is a black cat. If we go further down the road, I'm under this bridge. Well, look at that. Another black cat. There's one panther there.

There's one actual panther. No, that would be worth going to see, kind of. I want a panther, dude. And this one's also black. This one's also black. Anyway. Anyway, get out.

They don't drive you back. Get out. Yeah, yeah. Anyway, walk back. It'll do you good. I got fun 20 mile rock You don't have a good one Oh man

He drives off After watching three of his most popular bits I agree with Chris About Josh Johnson Youish Someone angrily screamed Bitch you need to chill the fuck out And I thought it was

Kind of ironic and funny These are the voyages of the Starship Dentoprise On his continuing mission To cross Sweeney's tooth gap Craig the Canadian I'm done being racist for good Now I'm racist for evil

It's your boy Sean Nee Come Titty I got my head Snark Tank fans are now homeless and deported service agent 267 I swear I thought they were called acidic Jews the Sistine

Chapel ceiling except Michelangelo painted people from the daily wire Oh That would make me cry dude I love the way my penis looks in this drawing You made it look so plump and juicy Yeah Actually Ben that's incredibly small

Oh yeah that's what I meant It's opposite day didn't you notice You didn't it's fucking You must not have noticed that it's obvious Day. My dick is it normal. It is in fact, opposite day. It is in fact opposite day, which, you know, it's a difficult thing to say to people

because sometimes it's implied that it's not an opposite day by saying it. It's a whole crazy. It's a whole paradise. These read the names. Anyway, my dick is fucking incredibly small. Incredibly small. And I do not drink Abby Shapiro's milk. I think her days are.

I don't have 12 four skins collected on top of one and out. Her penis, her teeth grow my penis shrinks. Happy opposite day. We are the megam. is that there? No. That would be a good. Unfortunately, Stephen Colbert did that and did it poorly.

So like he fucking ruined it. It would be a good idea. It would, yeah. But like he completely fucked it up. Damn it, Colbert. Colbert sucks. Man,

I used to like him. It's actually insane how unfunny he is. Like it must have been all his writers. It was that one show of Colbert, I think was good. Probably outside of it. He stole a bunch of John Stewart's writers and then it was just like, make me good. I probably agree with that. Make me good.

I'm Stephen Colbert. I don't know how to fucking talk to people. That's great. I swear. I'm Christian. I swear I thought they were called the Citic Juice. Okay, I read that out. Calling out Derek for calling us trans women or men in 229 and the tasteless use of the Fsler and 305, whatever.

Oh, I will always use the tasteless use of the Fler forever. So I don't know about the other thing. I know we addressed already, but whether, whatever. I'll stop when I'm 33. I'm an adult. I'm just going to talk like an adult. That's all. I'm not going to censor myself like I'm fucking doing some stupid piece or something.

I'm not going to say. Like green piece? Yeah, like green piece. Like the way else Yeah Just don't sense to yourself Dude I remember when I first got here I thought this girl was flirting with me at the mall

And she was And then she handed me like a fucking green piece Thing and I felt so shitty But that You see it's not your fault though Yeah you didn't do it wrong I should have noticed though Like it should have been obvious

In retrospect I just didn't really I never saw that before Like I never stopped to talk to people With fucking flies before in my life I didn't notice the flyers I was like man Damn

See that's something I feel like I would have fault for it too But only because I have experienced of being of being harassed many times like in a public so something because some women can get away with it I usually ignore it because it's usually guys

but I think it's because it was a woman It was a woman like oh hey cool Well I also thought like maybe she'd like like You know what I mean? Oh yeah yeah She stopped me and it's like maybe she recognized me Yeah I don't know Anyway

Derek's gay class where he if you don't If you don't gay enough gays He gazed you in the gay With gay until you're gay He's gay enough to his liking It happens I was terrible. It was pretty bad, but I, you know, thank you.

Thank you for the money. Slurban, stroking, smoking, joking. Dripp M.H. Lord of all Drift. Have you guys seen the Postal 2 video, the Postal 2 in VR trailer? No, I have not seen that. Obi won't you blow me, waiting for the Sween hunting tier. I want his pelt. Elon Musk leaks soy from his boobs when he's happy.

Cremlin de Gremlin, it's probably ketamine, actually. System of a gay, Gapuie. Get Gabby and Zach back on the podcast again, please. Marvin Gay, I didn't even have to change the name to make it gay. Biblically accurate, Ben Shapiro. Sweene hates being touched so much. He doesn't have sex. He just jacks off from the hallway. Facts. Wage Slate 583. Wage Slay 583. Faxe. I'm Kingsett. It's me. It's me. It's me. I cut the camera away so you know it's me. Yeah, you know. Ben Shapiro vertically bisecting himself to eliminate the left from his body. Wageleigh 583. The Pippini brothers present Gordon Ramsey cleaning Asmingold's room ASMR, Donk-Donkerson, the colon-swinging slasier. Yo Sweenin. I have the old hooked on phonics login. My family had for my nephews and nieces. Do you want it? It's yours, dude. Kingston is too afraid to shave his head.

I decided to draw, check the email. Oh, right. The sex queen. Great shit. She was awesome. You got to put that on a shirt. It's too good. It's, it's, uh, it's a, it's a, it's a circus and value.

Me be fishy. Limp biscuits and gravy. I want to hear a conversation between Chris's Elon and Zach's Trump. That'd be fun. John Strickland. Yeah, that'd be great. Merck's 1889, Mumford and, Mumford and Gay Sons. Of course.

Ben Gassin, uh, the first surgery, David Orson, Wells, more like Horace and Wells more like horse and smells. It's me, Casey Anthony. I love you, Kingston. Pepino spaghetti. Papino spaghetti playing illusion of Gaia right now. It's all actually her.

Yeah. Pre-Rod, that's her plan. Yeah. One of my substack subscribers told me about the snark tank. That's crazy. I had to go check it out. I heard you guys love me. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Blake 896, who do you think? I really need all the support I can get right now. Who do you think you are? I am. I love you too, Casey. I think I'm going to have sex with you. Oh, okay. Please stop.

Stop. It's me Devlin's Kingston. I'm going to fuck you as well, Kingston. It's me great. Oh, wait, Wallace. Wallet. Autistics Supreme Court would be like, I'm working late because I'm autistic. Chris having a contingency plan for Derek and Sween.

Das Guppy. Elon's baby armor sounds like a joker bit. I forgot about my Jared Fogel Time Machine name and wrote into a book club and they read my question, but not my name. Shot Young Sheldon versus Ran Overhead Joel, Nikki Ziggy, aka A, yeah. Yeah, bigger, zigger. Bigger, zigger. By Jordan.

Cutting the clean water act is an attempt to spread worm. Kingston, why do you have Molag Balls Mace now? Sorry, Chris, but I'm going to get some funny shit with this. They think the N on my head means something else. Crash. Sorry, Ms. Jackson, Badly Brave Dog, the Baby Hunter, Aetherian needs help, lowering his weapon and hail three. Orange Man Hunter from Missouri, Nafram, Melfis 1. And rounding out our list, as always.

The king of haphazard The king of king king king Can you believe it? It's so haphazard What we've done here? This is crazy What are you looking at? Speaking of Jordan

He's just He's been He's taken over Yeah he's sending me some crazy shit He's going hard And this one all I just see in the screenshot Is this dude banging a ball chick

And he has a plunger on the back of the head So I guess for leverage That's Freddie Gibbs as well wife. That guy's banging. Oh, for real? So you know, I know what you mean. Yeah.

So, you know, so you know. Anyway. What is wrong with people, man? All right. I thought he was actually, Kingston's showing memes. I don't want to see you this.

Shows over. Bye, everybody. Kingston's shown videos.