The Snark Tank - #324: Amouranth and the Shiggler

Episode Date: May 16, 2025

Spring weather is unpredictable. You never know which way you'll be adjusting your thermostat, unless you have the right windows. With Window Nation, you can count on your home being comfortable. Regardless of the weather, their windows are customizable and energy efficient. Expert installation takes just one day, and Window Nation products are backed by a lifetime warranty. There's no better time to upgrade with Window Nation. In March, the more you buy, the more you could save. Up to 50% off all window styles.

Visit WindowNation.com for your free consultation today. In a world of endless notifications, there could be an important one you're missing. Your kidneys may be signaling an SOS. With high blood pressure or type 2 diabetes, your kidneys could be warning you of early signs of damage, which may put you at higher risk for events like heart attack or stroke. But there's a simple test that can help spot a hidden signal. Ask your doctor about a urine test called UACR to help detect kidney disease and heart risk early. To learn more, visit DetectTheSOS.com today.

Look at mental fortitude. I already fucked up. You've been studying for years, too. This was your moment. The people in the audience don't know this. We've actually been planning a reveal that you know perfect, ancient chi-channeling dances. Yeah, I was. And today was going to be the big debut where you opened the show with it and you fucked it up immediately. This was my eight-mile lose-yourself moment.

Yeah. I was about to kill my cada. I put the The ball I just didn't know what else I got nervous Yeah I get it man You know you just see the

You visualize the dick and balls And then you just you drop it Yeah You rhyme I'm house with Stars And you're like fuck that doesn't rhyme Speaking of house

I was watching house the other day Or are you You're watching house I was watching house the other day Looks like I'm Mick There's an episode in the beginning In like the early seasons where a child gets abducted by aliens.

Yes, I saw that episode. What? I'm sorry, what? Joe's been binging house. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Mick has been binging house, too. And I went over there. I went, which is very weird

that both of you are binging house and the same time. It's very late. Welcome to Star Tank podcast. Amaranth, we just said Amaranth's name. So she's in the thumbnail. There you go. It's justified.

We got you. But, so, fucking. Let's go back to house. Yeah, let's go back to the more interesting subject. So, Mick. was watching House recently in his episode of House where he says his fake name for a restaurant was Mick

and I was like I fucking knew it I knew it because I think he looks like Mick What are you talking about? I think House looks like Mick I think you're racist How was that racist? Because he does not look like House I don't know how does that racist though

I don't see it a little bit Okay Oprah You look like Oprah No it's not like that I think if Mick was What the fuck do you mean? I think if Mick was white he'd look like House whatever I don't see it

This is irrelevant The point is He agrees with me But everybody else doesn't The point is The person that it is The point He's just entertaining you

He just knows I'm different And he's not trying to make me feel bad He doesn't want to trigger you Because you know understands that Like if you if you If you experience that kind of thing You'll start attacking him You'll start attacking him

Dude So I have to bring this up The audience doesn't know this The audience doesn't know this But I was He should have passed out So listen, hold on. I was, so I was scouring every now and then I'll watch, especially because I felt like the last two episodes that we did were like, I remember laughing a lot during them.

And so I was like looking for certain clips to maybe post to the channel. There's one that we posted on the Instagram that I didn't even realize was as funny as it was because like we did the fucking the URED and we both did it at the same time. But I didn't see him because my hands were up and his. Oh, so you didn't know. We didn't even know. Oh, I do. That's why I laughed so hard. I was like, holy shit

Perfection. It was in perfect sake But there's Absolute But so I was looking through The episode And for some reason Like I don't even know

Like YouTube loaded weird or something And it slowed down the video Oh that's how you did To like 25% Like I don't have that activated Normally ever Yeah And

This is Kingston You sound fucking so crazy I saw I saw that at like three in the morning after like a really long editing session and I was still editing I just took like a break to like get air and I looked I saw that and I fucking die

I was howling at like three in the morning just watching that Oh my God I sound I sound like That's not even me You sound like a drunk clown Yeah 100%

He he Who He's like a drunk clown That having an orgas It's about to Sexually assault somebody Or in the midst of it Yeah in the middle of it

He's like he's fucking Just having a good time Person screaming Flailing like fast But the clowns just like He He He

Who You fucking You actually went He He he Who Yeah I did

That's what fucking kills me. Is that my laugh slow down? I guess so. It must be. What does it sound like normal? What is the context of that fucking clip? You know, it's crazy? I wasn't even curious about it.

I really didn't. I don't even know what part of the video that's it. I thought about that and I was like, I'm not going to edit this to speed it up. I'm not going to do that. Because I don't know what part of the show that is. Yeah, I have no idea. I lost all sense of like, I don't even know what episode it's from. That's great.

You should show it at Hugh Lorry. Oh, I. I should. I should send it to DM. That's the first thing. That's our only connection. You, Lori follows me for some reason that I don't understand, and my only DM to him is a slowed down clip of Kingston laughing like a rapist. Oh, man. You should risk it all.

I should risk it all, yeah. Dude, why have you not asked him? Like, hey, man, how did you find me? I don't know. I think it's just past the point. I mean, I know it's been very many years. It would be so weird if I was like, hey, you followed me nine years ago. Yeah. And then he like somehow the text is in house speak. Like you can read it somehow. Yeah.

It doesn't matter. Even if you've never heard of house before, somebody reads it out loud and they start doing it. Based on your question. It sounds like you have cardiovascular meticuloma. Yeah. You're like that would not be the greatest response though. It would be perfect. You're like, hey man. I watched House for quite some time. You know, it's a big fan. Like how did you find me by the way? And then. Yeah. His answer is like you have cancer. He diagnoses him. And then he blocks you. Yeah. You have cancer.

Bye. You're not a doctor diagnosing you and then blocking you? Your chart must look crazy. That's a great. He doesn't even want to touch it. He's like, I'm out, dude. I'm out, man. Doctors are sometimes, I talked to my doctor or nurse practitioner today.

And what do you mean? Like, you just DMed him? Well, her, by the way. Well, I did DM her. I'll re-examine my personal biases. I said, what's good. I put a fire emoji on her, on her nudes. That's great.

Seeing your doctor's nudes are a wild activity. It's totally fair in some sense. Because they see you, kind of. Yeah, so some of them do. Some reciprocation. I'm never naked on my doctor. Do you have a doctor? F3, in fact.

So your doctor's never seen, like, any nude party view? No. I even cover my arms and I go. I'm not covered my neck. So you walk in the office You're supposed to get a physical And they're like I guess How are you feeling?

I drew my own blood And I was giving my bag of my blood You just give a random bag of blood There you go It's starting to cajole You better even use that Yeah yeah hurry up You know this was

The sandwich was in here before You know I don't know if that's gonna matter But no my doctor was Asking me a question Kixen goes into the doctor's office He goes, don't worry I drew my own blood And he hands him a literal

drawing of his blood. Not well done either. Yeah. It's like just... It looks more like an amoeba. It's a very good joke. It's like, oh, I'm working on this on open mic night. What do you think of that? Yeah, that's Alfred's I drew you a bathline from fucking... It really... From Batman the Anime's here. Same fucking thing.

So anyway, you were talking to your doctor? Oh yeah. I was about to give up on that. What do you say? Are you dying? Yeah. No, it was just one of those things where you were... I was just trying to explain to my dog. So there was no confusion. And I ended up confusing her.

So let me know if this is confusing. I was telling her that, oh, I'm having, I have this like varico seal thing. It's what, you know, my tubes are fucked up connected to one of my left testicle, right? And then so, well, she was like, which one is it again? And I said, from my perspective, my left, but it's your right. Sure. And then she was like, no, I'm just like, which one is it? And I was like, I was like, but my left, but, you know, just I want it.

Like, it's my left. Like, you know, but I was just saying it was you're right. So you, it covered all angles. She's like, yeah, I'm not asking for that. And I was like, what? And I was like, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. And I'll, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. It was crazy.

I was getting to the point where I was going to argue with her to be like, why are you rejecting my answer? I don't understand. Like, it's, but what happens is your balls get mixed up, like, you know, all wrapped around. And they're all wrapped around. And they're all wrapped around. It's like, my left, you're right, but it's the wrong right. your left is on your right so your left to them

I'm asking you if it's the top one or the back of the top or the back I think I would have switched doctors at that point I think I would have been like I'm out of here it would be disappointing because it's literally a stone's throat from my apartment like I just walk there she just goes like you go like yeah my testicles are all fucked up and she goes like it looks they look fine to me

what's the problem they don't seem messed up Yeah, doctor, I've been You know, I've been having this horrible pain Let me check you guys. She squeezes way too hard You hear a pop That's crazy Man

I think we I think you would pass out immediately right I don't think there's any way It's one of your testicles I think you're turning off I think they're unplugging the computer real quick There's no way you're gonna be a awake For that experience

I don't I don't know I've been I've had my ball squeeze One time I got my ball squeezed So bad that way when I'm swelled Why were they squeezed? Into the ball. Why were they squeezed and by whom? Don't worry about this.

No, no, no, no, I need this. It was a... Was it, uh, Hugh Lory? Let me check your balls. I'm gonna check your balls, Kingston. I'm a big fan. Just like I thought. You have breast cancer.

And then there's foreman like, no, man. It can't be... Yeah, it can't be breast cancer. It can't be breast cancer. It's in his testicles. And then like they bust open the... They take his scrotum and they put it under the microscope. He's got microscopic.

breasts on his scrotum. He's like, by God, by God, that ketamine freak is right. That freak is right. Don't ever doubt me again.

Is he on ketamine or is it like something else? Perkinset? I can't remember which one it is. It might be Vicodin. Oh, I think you're right. I think it's Vicodin, but I remember there was a cop

trying to bust his ass and calling him a drug dealer and shit. I forgot what he did to the cop, but the cop was kind of a dirty prick. Yeah, that was season 16 when they met each other in the Coliseon. Yeah, and it was like, I've had enough of your antics, damnicles. Yeah.

It's, it's on. His cane is enchanted by this point in the show. I love the idea of house existing for so long that it like becomes like a dragon ball like show. Or like they have nowhere else to go with it because it's just like it can only be like skin cancer so many times. I built a time machine. because I'm bored. I built a time cane. A time cane.

He taps it and then it like, the only problem is it's like the Wababajack. Oh, it's a random points. I don't know when. And that's a show. That's a fucking awesome show. It just becomes a wish boat.

Is that what the show's about? No. He goes back to like before the dinosaurs. Like the planet was a fucking nightmare zone. It was just like, he's diagnosed like, it's just all carbon. He's just like choking.

It's like, it's all like weird. giant plants and then like fucking everything looks like a horseshoe crab. That's a, that's far back, man. That's not like when there's probably like the water is black. It hasn't totally settled yet. Like I said, it's just all fucking carbon dioxide.

You're not even, he has to leave right. Well, I guess house can breathe. House figured out. You can breathe, but not from not much. Yeah, the enchanted cane allows him to breathe in a vacuum. Yeah. So he, he hits the cane, travels, and then the universe is barely. starting.

Yeah, yeah. No, the universe, the universe is having a trouble starting and then he has to diagnose the problem. Oh, you need a big bang. House is God.

Yeah. The universe. And the universe goes like, yeah, house. Oh, yeah. This becomes kind of like, it's still cancer.

Like that, even at that point. You have universal cancer. You have universe cancer. You have universe cancer. Oh, fuck. And then like, Formin somehow,

no, man, it's, it's not, your house, you're wrong. Yeah. somebody else shows up like like a passing like I don't even like what do you some some entity that's an entity that you're in your wrong house and incorporeal

incomprehensible space cloud like defiantly exx I don't even exalts itself yeah you know you don't know what you're talking about you're wrong as and then and I was like why why why do they always doubt me this is high concepts what they always doubt me and this is only season six. Would that not be one of the best shows if it started off completely mundane? Oh, it's one of my favorite prospects or like the concepts of like a show starting off grounded and like really believable and then just becoming. I mean, it kind of does. It never jumps the shark to the degree that I want them to.

I'm saying. I'm saying that. It's kind of interesting. don't like shit like that. You think it's, I just agree. Do you think it might be the producers too scared to let it happen? If we do, it's gonna fuck the show, but like, I think that's funny. Like, I think the shows are already fucked though. Like, oh,

we were talking about the Walking Dead with like fucking, I don't know, Darrell and France for some reason. Oh yeah, there's like a thousand spin-offs. Have you guys seen the movie Nightcrawlers? No, I've heard I've heard good things about it, though. No. So there's a moment where he's like everything's going on and he goes in a room and there's a gigantic

spider, but like, not gigantic, like a large spider and relative terms. It was a room-sized spider. Yeah. And it's like, what was happening? What was the movie like normal before that? Well, yeah. Yeah, very. Well, movies kind of centralized on that because like a lot of

movie twists are kind of that sometimes. Like, not a lot of them, but like a- What's the most shocking twist you remember in the movie? I think about Cabin in the Woods. I think about... That one is the closest, I would say. Yeah. Because even the... Although it is kind of set up.

It was, it was ground. Even the twist was grounded until the reason why they were doing it. That's when it was like, what? Yeah. What? The scene of Chris Hesworth going over that fucking gap with the fucking motorcycle and they get the wall and you guys. Look at Thor.

Look at it. I was like, holy shit. That's her. That's rough. I mean, if you consider it a horror film, that's my favorite horror film. Only because, like, I traditionally don't really like horror films that much. Yeah, yeah. They're just too.

It's a great one. They're too. Haras, Har is such a hard fucking. To me, we're just like, I was talking to, um, I was talking to Georgia because we finally saw centers and, um, you know, like when it comes to horror films like, it said like, I don't mind the contrivance because the horror films can't exist without it. So, but by default, it makes me kind of like, it depreciates it a little bit for me. Yeah. Because it's, but I'm like, it's fine. I know what I'm watching. And I, and I think because of the cabinet of the woods and how

left field it went. And I was like, that was so fucking enjoyable. And it's in, in, in the silliest, funnest way and I feel like that's I would love more thing like if Howells did a cabin in the woods. Yeah. The thing is like a movie can't really A movie has to make money back. No, no, no. It's not even that.

It's just that a movie is self-contained in a way that's like it's harder to do for them. Like I think it's a way, I would much prefer a show to do it because I just think there's more room to get you attached. There's more room to get people like invested to the point where like, well, wait, I can't let go of these characters. I've spent so long with them.

Yeah. So even if they go, even if they shrink to the size of ants, I honestly, Dr. House shrinks to the size of an end and has to cure an ant colony. I think it would, I think word of mouth would get that.

I show, it's like the way that, it's the way that it's not even, and I'm not saying, I'm not comparing it like, oh, it would be the same quality because Claire obscure is like the quality is like off the charge. But as far as the word of mouth,

I've, I haven't seen anything have that much like yap yap yap yap as far as every corner of where I'm going that's even people are just kind of like yapping on about it and on about it and I think that something like almost like a phenomenon or almost like a cultural movement. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And I feel like that's how somebody can take the risk of house,

bringing house back, for example, for whatever 10 seat, whatever it's on. And they're all, Kumar's been resurrected or something. That's the whole thing. They wanted to save him and oh, they wanted to save some girl that she ended up dying because she saved house. Like there was a, it was, there was like a terrorist attack or something on a bus.

And because she took house home. I don't remember. It was so insane. I'm on the computer working and I'm looking over like, what the fuck are you watching? Doesn't someone die because of house and the husband's always mad at house from that? Well, it's not there was one of his best friends, house's best friends. the kind of boyishly No, not the Boishy Hampson one

It's just because there's the Boisely Hansom Was the Australian one or something And then there was like another white guy Everybody else in that show is just not house So like I don't know I don't know their names I just know I just know Foreman Is the black dude

Omar Epps He's the one that doubts him He's the his role is to doubt house Every fucking episode Yeah even though he's always right And so like I know Foreman And then I don't remember everybody else's name, unfortunately.

It takes house being wrong one time for things to get really bad at that hospital, you know? It takes like one time for him to be like, I'm going to give this guy that's overdosing on fentanyl some fucking strawberry gummy beers. Yeah. I can't believe you walked into this emergency room and you didn't even think to put your baby in the microwave for two seconds to fix this problem. And it

works? Of course, of course it's going to work. Yeah, it always works. It's house. A house. Can a baby survive in a microwave two seconds? No. I think two seconds, yes. I think two seconds will be like a lot. I think two seconds is totally fine. All right, go try it. No, I mean, give me a baby.

I don't know. I don't got a baby. Well, then see, the world will never know. Damn. Two seconds is pretty. Did, do you think, what year were microwaves invented? No, no, no. 12.

Discovered. What year were, discovered? Yeah, they were microwaves discovered. They were roaming the fields. I want to go 1930. 32. 32? So, so, so they, so pre-war,

World War II. They feel like 50s things to me for some reason. Probably. I don't look it up. I'm curious. Yeah. I'm assuming probably 40s, 50s. I'm just hoping it's before Dr. Mangula was doing his thing.

Because I want to incorporate microwaves into my theory. Yeah, in 1945. Oh, damn. Close. Damn. Just a little bit. So the war ended. The war ends and then microwaves began.

Or we're just. Yeah, that was Hitler. Hitler's whole thing was like he didn't want microwaves to happen. He microwaved his face, and that's how that war ended. Yeah, yeah. He couldn't wait for the food. He was too hungry. He microwaved his face with bullets.

Yeah, he put a bullet cartridge in the microwave trying to heat up his bullets because he was so hungry in the bunker. That is so insane. It is like. The idea that like you'd get anything out of hot metal. that you wouldn't get out of this cold metal if you're forced to eat it. Yeah. Because he really liked the smell of gunpowder and stuff

and he thought, you know, if I heat it up really hot it would probably taste really good. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, because he snorts, he was snorting it anyway. Yeah. What the fuck am I hearing? You're hearing history, idiot. If you snorted gunpowder and then smoked,

would you like kind of like explode a little bit every now and again? I'm going to ask Hitler. It's a stupid question that I asked of you. As a matter of fact, I think I'm going to go ask Hitler. As a matter of fact, it's a form and cover for me. Let me go. I forgot what is that.

He time travels back to Hitler? Hitler, any directs. Hitler, any dread, any, dread... Lébert, uh, Libidik, I'm a libidique. Is that German? Yeah. I was trying to say I love you, but I couldn't remember at first.

I'm surprised they even have a word for that. Mine. German sounds fine when, when the non-angry ones are speaking it. Problem is, you know, they're all too angry. They're all angry. Yeah. That's the issue. All right.

Well, what do we... So what do we got? Most people gain. I'm gonna be dick. Sorry, I've been listening to... Kanye song. Yeah. Yeah.

Man, I was watching a... So I was watching a review of sinners by deleted. He was talking about it. And I just wanted to see his insight. And he starts the video off doing a disclaimer or whatever. And then it's like an intro to delete it. And it's the fucking beat to that Heil Hitler song. And I'm like, God damn you, dude.

Like, can I escape? this stupid bullshit for a second? No. I can't, can I? Yeah, obviously not. Like, I'm just like, I'm trying to, I'm trying to like, oh, I was talking to Jojo being like, hey, man, this weekend has felt good, not seeing anything that's happening with the administration, seeing nothing. The closest thing I saw was Amaran's arguing with their stupid fucking husband or whatever.

Yeah. But that was inconsequential because they don't care about her, right? Exactly. So I was just like, okay, whatever. But I was like, man, this has been good. I haven't seen anything. Nothing creeped on my timeline. It was just smooth.

I watched the playoffs, the NBA playoffs. I watched fucking UFC. It was everything. And then I watching late last night, I'm watching that before I went to bed. And then I just, you know, that beat, which is kind of a good beat. That's the problem. It's not, like, melodically, it's not bad at all. It's probably the best thing he's made in a long time, which is embarrassing.

It really, I was just like, God, why did I just got, I was floating. And then I just got, I was like, oh, yeah, I live on. earth here. Yeah, yeah. Damn, okay. Fair enough. Thanks deleted. Appreciate you.

But yeah, so what do we, what do we got for this? Not really much happened, I think. As far as I'm aware. I did want to mention not going to detail because of about Clairebscure Exhibition 33, but I did finish it. You finished it first. Yeah. I finished it probably, I don't know, Thursday or something.

I don't remember. And I was blown the fuck away with just. Like, I was really trying to think about it. And this experience was, I was like, when's the last time I had an experience that, like, hit that hard for me? And it was probably, which is actually coincidentally,

I saw this on my Facebook memories, Dark Souls 3, when you're making your way to On Orlando. Yeah. And like, and just how breathtaking everything looked. And I just saw my Facebook memories. It said I still haven't seen anything that looks this great. and man

this is close even just even some of the like some of the dude some of the some of the lighting just went so hard where I was just looking at some you're just walking around like and I'm just like looking at the floor and I'm like the reflection of the lighting

from the sky I'm just like they fucking murdered this game dude it's really fantastic the water area looks insane yeah man it's a beautiful game man everything about it is everything about it is really damn stellar. The only flaw I think I could even see with it is it's,

there's not a mini map in some locations and that's kind of confusing sometimes. It's annoying. And there's optional platforming sections that are not good. They're like the platform, it's not a platforming game. Unreasonably hard because it's not designed. Yeah. Your character does like a little role every time they land. So like platforming is insane.

If you are going forward at all and, and then your platform is not the same and you jump. It's so, I mean, it's, I didn't accomplish, I didn't beat any of them because I was just like, I'm good. It's barely even there. There was, he goes with that for it. There's one part where I did, I was a little mad because I did want to fight this boss that's in like a, there's a bunch of picture frames in that world and you're supposed to collect these things to wake up this boss. Oh, that's crazy. There's like three things.

There's like three things. So there's like there's a, but you have to, of course it's like obstacles. You have to balance on these picture frames, these broken picture frames. I did two of them, which were really tedious,

annoying. And I was like, oh, there's a third. No, I just quit. I was like, I'm not doing this again.

Yeah, makes sense. And I really wanted to fight the boss. I'm sure it was going to be badass rewarding doing all. I'll probably just live on YouTube. But it is like, yeah,

it's an amazing game. Yeah. It's easily, Game of the Year for me. It's, I can't even imagine. I know I'm looking I'm looking forward to Doom in a couple days,

and I know death strandings on the horizon, but I just, I can't imagine anything really. And honestly, like, I mean it, like sincerely. If GTA 6 came out this year,

I actually don't know for sure if it would have beat it. It probably wouldn't actually. So I looked at all the games that won since its inception. Because my thought was, before I looked it up, my thought was I don't think I've ever felt this strongly about something that is so obvious because a lot of times,

there's been some decent competition, even when there was a really strong game. We were like, I'm not 100% confident about what's going to win. Yeah. Maybe 2023, just because like Baldersgate 3 was such a massive achievement. And I was like, okay, that feels pretty safe. But 2023 was still a good fucking year. Yeah. But like everything else, I was like, oh, yeah.

So this year, I'm like, I don't think it matters what comes out. I really, I don't think anything this feels like, um, like let's put it. this way. I've never, I don't call games masterpieces because I feel like there's always some issues they can poke at. The closest thing I was just really satisfied with Resident Evil 2 because of like, I was like, this is like a perfect remake for me. Yeah, for sure. You know, I wouldn't necessarily call it a masterpiece only because it's like, okay, I, the experience has been muddled by beating the original a thousand times. Sure. So, but for somebody else, maybe they feel differently that never played Resident Evil 2. Anyway, this hit in a way that I haven't,

experienced in fucking forever. I was like, this is kind of lightning in a bottle. Yeah, I feel like. It feels like living through a moment where it's like, you know that this is like a Final Fantasy 7 kind of thing. Yes. Where like people are going to be talking about this for like forever. 100%.

It's really fucking great. And I highly recommend it. We're going to do, I think, an extra ammo. Yes. Dedicated to it. Because it's that good, I think. Yeah. It bears diving deep into it.

And I can't wait to talk to you guys about like, um, your feelings on the ending and all like our thoughts and all that stuff yeah it's gonna be a good conversation i think yeah yeah i wanted to get that out of the way because not for sure and and also be like a what do you call them profits what do you call them when you're when you feel compelled to like spread the word about something that you really you know religious people behave yeah yeah yeah i want you to experience what i experience cross-ely ties yeah so like i'm gonna i'm gonna be a i can't think of the word it doesn't matter but yeah i i will Talk about that constantly to get everybody to fucking force everybody to play it.

I'll break in your house and I will make you install it. And you will beat it. And you will thank me after you beat it. Yeah, man. I was looking forward. Like, it's, it makes me feel good because like when I first saw it, I was like, that's going to be cool. Like, I knew it.

Like, there was something about it. I was worried that, like, maybe it wouldn't end right or like, maybe like everything would be great, but like the ending's kind of whatever, you know? or like maybe there would be something wrong with it because I remember seeing trailers for it and being like this looks like it's too good to be true really it looks like it's too good like there must be something wrong with it

and they're kind of are but like not nearly it just again like bad platforming that is optional and the lack of a mini map that's only kind of it's barely even that's me really struggling to find something negative to say you know yeah

it's yeah the But I'm not done with it yet, but I'm going to finish it. I'm going to finish it probably about tomorrow. You're still pretty early. Like you're in act one. Take your time with it. Like, we want to, we don't want to rush it to it. I'm very over leveled though for I'm at though.

What level are you? I'm like level 34. That's actually insane. Let me ask you something. I'm very over leveled. I beat it when I was like 50, I think. When you, um, I, I beat it like, I was way higher when I beat it also because you do extra shit.

I was doing a lot of extra shit. I was doing things that I shouldn't have done before I, uh, got the, because you guys mentioned because I was annoyed about the the damage cap and then you can actually Get a breaker. Yeah, so I did I beat a lot of stuff that I should not have beaten Yeah, that's the ultimate combat ability. That's what I just got. What are you? An extra combat ability? The gradients. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. You know, you're pretty early. You're in act one. Yeah, I see. I've got to agree. Okay, I just got to agree. Because you don't start off with it.

No, which yeah, that that mechanics is fucking insane. There, I mean, I was like what the fuck is this thing? It's so funny thinking about where you are in the game because it's just like it gets Yeah whatever well You saw a character that I love the audience I want to play as I'm really bad They nerfed Mayo Oh they're they one of her ability one of her one of her weapons Yeah one of it because it was this one shotting everything

The katana that fucking stupid ass weapon that you get And so I was yeah it was I mean because you can start off in virtuous I got that I got that item by mistake because where you first find it That like the arena By mistake yeah because I didn't I didn't I didn't get it purposefully because you can get it later on. I thought, no, isn't that a boss? Well, it's a boss. I got it in my...

I mean, like a plot boss. I got it where I am. Because you can fight it with anyone. I got it where I am in a story. Usually people get it by later on when they go back to that area. I got it like... Are we thinking of 15? We might be thinking of two different things. We might be thinking of two different things. You're talking about the one that makes start in Virtress mode, right? Her blue, the blue like electrified sword, right? Well, I'm thinking of a purple one.

It might be purple, but I see. but I see it as blue. My eyes are fucked. Maybe. You started Virtuous. If you're talking about that one specifically, if you're talking about that. Yeah. If you're talking about that.

Because I just, we might, because like from what you're saying, we might be talking about a couple of others. Because I know you can get it later on in the game. But what happens is that there's a part in the village that you can fight with any person to get the fight. Then you get a weapon for every person.

I just chose her because I think she's cool. There might be so, like we might be talking because here, I never one shot about. boss. Not with her. I actually with a different character. I just don't want to say the character just because I know I know the character. Yeah. Okay. Yeah. I, I, I, two sorts. Um, well, it just basically don't worry about it. Yeah. You just, um, you know, his, his ability when you get it all the way up, you know, to like, if you've ever, you actually

get an achievement if you ever get it, uh, to, to, to S. I just say that. Okay. I know, that's not you, nobody will know what the fuck I'm talking about. Okay. Don't spoil it. Because I I think I know what you're talking about, but I know it's important. It's not spoiling that what I just said right there because you can't have any. It's like trying to tell somebody about a new color. You would have to know it. You have to care at all. There's literally, it's, literally, it can't spoil anything.

But it's really good. We're going to talk more about it. I know, I know it's, you know, we'll talk more about it on a dedicated, on a dedicated episode. That's good. I haven't been tested to play. I, um, I, too shot at the main boss, though, I'll say that. You two shot at the final boss in a game. Because you get to a certain point where you just, yeah, you, um, you, um, you, you, you, you,

It's so, well, they said, if you're good at parrying and then, um, there's an easy way to just get your shit, you know, get everything primed. It's just, it's so, it's, it's so easy to just, I love what they did with it. It kind of annoyed me that they even nerfed you because it's, there's no PVP where I was like, why not just let people have that thing? And then if they get bored, they can use something else, you know? Yeah. Because they said they're like, oh, it's not intended to do that, but I'm like, it's not, we're not competing with anybody. It doesn't matter. Yeah, I run see a Halo, uh, helldivers when they were like.

This weapon is too strong against the bugs. And it's like, do the bugs? Are the bugs complaining? Like, what do you mean? Like, are the bugs going to stop playing the game? What the fuck you're talking about? Who the hell cares? Like,

just the fucking takes it up and throws it on the fucking fore. I'm fucking out of here, man. Can you imagine if you were playing a destiny raid and, uh, well, they do that destiny. No, no, I understand. But like, you imagine if like the reason was like, that's like, oh, guys, Atheon's not showing up to the vault of glass because he's sick of dealing with his weapon. He's so tired of getting beat. The raid boss doesn't show up.

He doesn't show up. He quit. The myth of class has been used against him too much and he's really not. I'm not a moof for anymore. That would Loki be kind of interesting. It would be funny. As like an event. Like that would be like so meta.

It's crazy. It'd be curious to be like, oh, what happens when something doesn't work the right way? It doesn't even waiting at the end. They're like, uh. That doesn't seem even out of pocket for Destiny at this point if they're going to do a fucking Star Wars expansion. So like, don't hate it's cool, man. I love Star Wars. No, I think it's, I mean, I think what they're doing is cool.

Um, so whatever. A bit of glory. If they put fucking a character in there though, like, because there's a, I don't know if you guys know this, but like, Gerald from the Witcher just shows up in like some other game. I can't remember. Like straight up, he walks through a portal. And that was like a crossover event.

It was like, I don't know, I don't know, I don't know a, like a game like that. I don't, I might be misremembering exactly. In that universe, it'd be really unfortunate having a witcher running around a universe, making everything so much worse. No, Monster Hunter. Wilds, I think. Okay. He walks through a portal

and shows up in Monster. That makes the faintest amount of sense, but also stupid. At least it's not, it's not as egregious as I was thinking. Yeah, he doesn't show up.

He's a gun. He doesn't show up in like Red Dead redemption or something. Oh, that would be fired. Gerald in the fucking can't beat in the fuck out of Micah and no one can help.

Everyone is like, if he help, he's going to kill us too. Just let him beat up Micah. Ignif. Pts. Ah! What the?

What the hell? What's the whole? Why'd you do that? He's on fire, John. He's on fire, John. Well, I'm seeing a lot of things about that. I ain't never done seeing a man control fire like that. What do you call them things a witcher?

Yeah, I'm very aware of witches, man. They got him back where I come from. He's aware somehow. Yeah, I don't see a witcher too. I learned about it from this none. From this done. We can use this. Trust me.

Trust me. Have a little faith article. And his plan is ultimately just to rob someone. He is supposed to use the girl to rob someone. He gains a character that is supposed to be in the universe. And he's like, we can use this to rob these people that are rich. We can rob a stage coach with him. We can go back to Blackwater.

Dude, we have a witcher now. We go back to Blackwater. It's power scaling in universes like that is so fun. Like, I'm playing through Doom Eternal again. to prepare for like the new doom yeah that's into the week right uh may 15 i know it's like early access right now but i also just i have a lot of editing to do so i'm just like i'll i'll just wait but um do maternal is like on crack dude like the game is so fast it's ridiculous i forgot how fast i beat the first dLC and i didn't do a second one i'm really it's hard

dude like that's a not easy game at all ancient gods is a really annoying dc like i didn't have fun playing out i'd finish the first dealc i'd finish the first dealc and i'd finish the first one and then I beat it I was like all right cool and I was going to do the second one I was like I don't really want to do this and I didn't play the second one I get it yeah it's hard man I've had I've had my moments like that with the the Soulsborn series like I'm kind of I need a long

break I do I do all the I've never beat a single one of them yeah yeah I always get like really deep into them and then I'm like and then something happens where like I lose the feeling of satisfaction from beating a boss like it begins to just not feel like anything and then I'm just like eh I don't know if I care to keep doing this I kind of understand that. I kind of got that in Eldon Ring. I had my fill and I didn't do Shadow.

I didn't do Ertree. I got deep into Ertry. I got deep into Ertry and the base campaign. I never beat either one. I just knew I wasn't going. I probably wasn't going to beat. I just, I don't feel like being really angry.

And I know at a certain point those games always do that. Dude, Malik, when I got to Malikah, I was like, he was the most out of pocket box in the game. I'm not doing this doesn't even feel like When you counter him, it's crazy though He doesn't even He's doing gainers like that running off a wall The bag of the back of the counter him

And he slips like a real dog And he falls down And he's like, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow. The thing with Maliketh is that You poor little beast The thing with Maliketh is that He doesn't even feel like he was like It almost feels like they didn't make him on purpose

Like he just Like he feels like he doesn't belong there I think he does He's so he's so sporadic in his movements Yeah, it's just like this is like him I think I think I think the, I think. How close is that to the end, by the way?

Not very far from end at all. You have, like, maybe like two hours a gameplay left? Whatever, whatever. Yeah, I'm not, I'm not going to be, but I'm not going back to that game. I put 170 hours into that game. The fight that got me was, plenty. I know how I feel about it. It's not going to change.

Huh? The final boss got me so annoyed. Have I held in it? Is this a skill check of how well you play the game? Like, actually. It's like, oh, can you, did you learn how to play the game actually? Ah. All right.

So if you know to put a game, you can beat her to the first. The second fight is kind of like... I'd be millennia. Millennia is annoying. That's a good one. But she's cheesable though. She's really hard to fight. But like if you're going to fight her in an honorable way, you're going to go blow for blow with her, it's hard to fight her.

But if you know like, oh, you could stagger this bitch to come to cows come home, you just keep staggering and burning her. And I kept doing that. I was like, you dumb rotting or, like, you dumb rotting slut. I burned her and I kept hitting her. And then I was playing with Jake and Jake just hit her with a. sword and just fell down for real. I always forget that that game is like multiplayer because they don't feel like PVP games

to me. Right. I never do those. I never did PVP in this game at all. Like this one in particular, I didn't do any PVP. In Eldon? Yeah, and freaking, I did it for like, there's a part of a mission that you have to do a little bit of PVP. Yeah, to get like an item or something. And what you call it for the, uh, the vampires. Yeah. I didn't, I, I, I,

I hate it. Like, I never do it. I heard like, like, when everybody was kind of actually excited about two when they were playing it, It's actually really good. That is one I had to do the good PFP, yeah. I watched a lot of it, but I just, I know, first of all, I know I'm not going to do well, because I see what people do in those. Yeah.

I'm like, that doesn't look fun at all. I can't think like that. Like, they're seeing people like just, it almost gets to the point of it, it starts turning into like fighting games where people are spreading frames and shit. And they're like, oh, I know this and here's hitboxes. And I'm like, it's not fun for me anymore. I'm like, it's got, it's now it's a job. I love Bloodbore.

I love Bloodbop. That's just hilarious. You shoot them real quick and they fall down. You do run around them too way real quick. You do a circle around them and you dig your hand in the back of their body and fling them across the room. I never played much of Blood Boat. It's so shitty. I would do twirls and then invisible attack them.

The issue with Bloodborns that it runs at 20 frames per second, so it's hard for me to play it. I just, um, still not on a PC. It's not happening. They lost the source code to that game or something. I think the contract. Will they just say why? I think they lost it. I think they straight up lost it because like it makes no sense why they haven't like at the very least just upresed it.

10 years. You know? It's 10 years now. Yeah. But what like. It's over 10 years. If they. Well, it came out in 2015. Oh, did it?

Yeah. Oh, I thought it was 14. Around now actually. I think it's almost actually 10 years. If it's in 14 then I'm. No, you're probably right. It's one of those things that. No, you're right.

It's in bloodborne and which came up to some year. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That's right.

I'd fallouts for Can they just say I'll be okay with it They just say It would make me feel much better Like yeah Oh what a bummer But if you just mean a lot

It would mean a lot to me Yeah to be honest We don't know Like you said We don't know It would mean a lot to me So we remember that line From what?

From Red Dead 2 When he was about to die I was gonna say It would mean a lot to me Yeah I don't remember that at all When he's dying This is good ending dying

when he's dying and he's like Go on get out of here Go be your husband and a father Yeah I don't know He's like I'm not gonna leave you Arthur Did you guys ever do bad ending? No I did it one time

Yeah it was really not a good idea I feel like with those It's really sad It's really dissatisfied Yeah I feel like I don't know With games like with multiple endings I'm like I'll just look up the other ones You know what I mean

I'm not gonna fucking go through the whole thing Or even just like do the save thing What about a I won't say never mind I was just going to ask about Sure, sure, sure, yeah. I know it has multiple endings too. I know that.

Yeah, I just all, but I was like, I don't want to. Yeah, no. It's fine. We don't need a, I don't need to probe that anymore. But, yeah. The bad. I usually, if it's easy, if it's easy, I'll do it. I'll do the multiple endings.

If it's, uh, if I don't have to go through the entire fucking. It's not like, uh, the thing is, it's always easier to just to look it up. It is. It is ultimately no difference. For some reason, I don't fucking do that. I just, my brain just, I need to do it And even though it's literally the same thing

If you just look it up So I had full honor And then I started the game Right at the end of the San Deneas part Where you're pretty much towards the end of the game And within 20 minutes I had The lowest honor possible Because I went through the city

Murr They just couldn't stop me I was shooting horses Shooting horses the moh Horses gets you your honor down to quickets So I just kept shooting horses Yeah I held up in the

I think it's I don't know. It's a big, I don't know. It's the juke joint for me. The only time I've ever gone. I was going to a juke joint and I shoot all the women in there. The only time I've ever gone back and like read like actively chase the different ending was like the mass effect two suicide mission. Where like where Garris for me died and I was like no, we're not doing that.

I did. And I started the game over. You started the whole game. You started over. You did you. I remember you saying that. Yeah. Yeah.

Because I did because I, because I, because I didn't want. That's crazy the whole game. But like. Yeah. Because the through line. Because I wanted. insisted through line. Did you not do his loyalty mission or something?

I guess not. I must not have done it the first time I played it. Yeah, maybe because to me I'm like there's no reason to start it over. I think it's all back to the suicide mission. Well, no, I didn't know what I didn't look up like how to avoid it. Oh, how you do. I just went back. I just went back all the, from the beginning and just was like very, very careful.

Very careful of Garris. Are you all right? Yeah. You think you're going to die anytime soon, Garris? You're afraid of explosions, bro? But also, I think for me, I just wanted, like, a consistent through line of just, like, I wanted to have my own canon to be reasoned. Like, I didn't, I don't know. Like, I wanted it to make sense.

Yeah. I understand. I did that for the first one because I had to, uh, I had to kill Rex. Yeah. And I was just like, uh, you know, I was just like, uh, you know, I was just like, uh, I was like, well, I got, I got to, like, I got to murder Rex. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. My first place. Yeah. I just started over. I think also because, like, I think, I wasn't super happy with how I allocated my stats because it was like my first time playing a game like that so I'll just restart and then

that was me for so I fucked up in Baldersgate 3 and for some reason Damon died who's Damon the guy that can fix Carlac yeah the I didn't know so I was at like act three right before the beginning act three and I was like oh no I gotta do this all over again so I started the game over again max everything I hope I hope the three ways I was I was married to Carlac and I was married to Shadow Heart

but is a glitch when you get when you start the thing over when after you fuck car like the first time you just don't talk the shadow heart about it i just didn't talk about it that's crazy was a talk to her about like in the camp and i just didn't talk to her i was like it was like nope curious i ain't gonna expose me i was kissing them both like when you were going on the final fight about to crime the other way i was kissing them both like can i get a kiss bitch so that's when you talked to her you didn't talk to her until the final Nah, it was just, it was a lot of me, like, avoiding speaking to her vehemently.

You just treat fucking Baldersgate like too hot to handle or something. It literally is for me. That's honestly ridiculous. It's how is it ridiculous. I fucked, I fucked Laisel. I was going to fuck Gail, but he's got to ask him too much shit. I fucked the will just to make him feel bad. It's so, I'm so, I'm so asexual in these games.

I was fucking my way. I don't care. Like, I was raising. When I play these games, I'm literally like, no one is worth my time. Oh, no, no. Ever. I, the one thing. I will say like that that uh that I find it reminds me of because I I love

RPGs that have like that engagement and love interest and stuff sure yeah it's just it's so much more engaging and and then you get funny moments like dumb shit like that but uh dumb as intellect intelligence yeah yeah no it's it's it's uh look I like doing that stuff like that would bother skate stuff like that uh but like say it is cool when there's a game that there's like predetermined shit going on. That's, uh, I was wondering,

I was thinking how would, how would, how would, how would, uh, Claire be, how would Claire obscure be if, if it was,

their relationships weren't designated already. Yeah, if it was more like that, like, like, I wonder how much more, uh, it would have,

I can already tell one relationship that would be there. Like if the main, we should stop talking about the game. It's not really about like, I didn't, yeah, I didn't want to go into. I just,

I can tell Gustav would be with the ninja, I don't want the two, the two, um, like the sickles that are attached. That has the Twilight feature. What's her name? C.L.

C. Well, you say, can we not? Like, I just, I think it's pointless because we can't talk really about it. Yeah,

we didn't have to talk about that. I was bringing it up just like, it's not, it's like, it's like freaking Garrison, freaking tally. And then you're being like, what the fuck are you doing?

And you blow Gers his head off. So it's, well, I didn't, I, suicide mission, I let the, the,

the bugs take them. That's so crazy. That's what it was. That's actually worse. It's like, it's like, I'm just playing Mass-Vic 3. Like, I don't know, man.

Like, it's such a important part for me, at least. Not in three. He doesn't really do anything. I use him, I use him regardless. I mean, well, I can. I like that he slas people. I telly her drone is fucking excellent. So that it's like a-

It is overpower. Her drone is excellent. So I'm good with that. And then, um, uh, I kind of, I feel like I'm so OPE in that game that I kind of, like being a vanguard in that game is so ridiculous. It, it reminds me. me of doom, for example, because I'm just charging in, shotgun blasting people. I didn't like the Vanguard until I used it. I was like, oh, this is like not that fun.

It's fucking great. And then I teleported across the room into some guy and then punch the floor before in the air. There is no limit to the to the length of where you could go. And that's the thing that they could have nerfed really. I'm just saying like if they, but since I guess it's not PVP again, there's no reason to. But so they, you there's like, oh, he's wait. Oh, as soon as you can just see his life, that's, now you're across the map. And then fucking Nova Slam, your fucking shield regenerated,

shotgun blasting motherfuckers. That shit is really fucking dumb. Because I'm like, it's such an insane, like animation. I imagine their perspective. I was like, do do do do do. And you just hit by a person.

Dude, it's fucking, it's just unstoppable. Guys played a mass effect games. I regret I took, I saw him play those games, man. Yeah. I was thinking about a, fucking love them.

It was hard for me to think about, because I was thinking about what were my, the three games were the most important to me, I feel like. And it was interesting that, I was decided between Mass Effect 2 and 3 because two, I think, was technically more important, but when I think about the overall package

as far as like visuals and the score and the gameplay, I actually enjoyed three more, which is, it's hard for me. almost sounds weird for me to admit just because of some of the problems that three had, but I've talked about that. Yeah, yeah. Most of the problems were there in the vanilla version that made it such a horrible experience compared to like, say, if you play the legendary edition.

And then, uh, so then I was like, okay, that, uh, Dark Souls 3 is still like, I just fucking love that game. It's still my favorite out of all the games. Yeah. And then, uh, bringing a nigga back in fucking Night Rain makes me so mad. Fucking Nameless King. He was in the trailer for Nighterang. That's right.

Well, I guess it makes sense because Whatever He's these people People love him They absolutely love him I don't know how you can love that Gigantic people who say that fucking dragon riding They fucking hate him

I saw that and I was like bro come on I hated you so much Yeah I hate that he's in Dark Souls 1 too technically When you go to that dilapalated city When you're in Adolando And there's this one giant statue That's broken

That's the nameless king again And I'm like fuck I want you dead so bad I can you hate him if you don't even know his name Yeah, it's like well, yes, the name. I've never put it to memory But the character's name is the nameless king Well, then

He's Gwyn's kid But he can't have a name then Remain nameless I just wonder why is Gwen such a bitch I mean He had the world on lock for a while Wasn't a bitch He wasn't a bitch until your character

Psychotic ass went there It's like I'm gonna change the way The universe works Yeah Sometimes it got him man Look man All I'm got to say is that every now and then.

Look, I'd ruin the world for a fucking few kicks for every now and then. Yeah. Why not? You know, who's going to do anything about it? If you had, if I had the, if I had the ability to do what, um, uh, what your character does in DS1, I would do that. Especially like if, you know, the, the conditions, how things are right now. I'm like, yeah, it's time.

It's time to, let's put the flame out. Yeah. I would want to, but I'd be so scared. I'd be like, do I do, what's going to happen if I do this? What are the ramifications? There ain't no ramifications, son. Yeah. What if I do something wrong in it, someone dies?

That never happens. Would you bang the, man, what's the dragon called the, the, the white dragon? The one with all the teeth? Darby? Yeah, Darby. Darby the Dragon, yeah. Would you bang Darby the Dragon? No, I think Darby the Dragon is like seven.

Oh, if you're fucking dragons, you're really, you're really something off. Dragon years. What is that, though? I think it's I think seven dragon years is six human years Low key It's probably less

You got questions Because dragons age Because dragons live forever Like the damn it forever So it's probably less How do you know Every fantasy dragons Dragons live for fucking

Thousands of years They're not turtles So They're worse Or better The only real dragons Are the rain of fire dragons All right guys

That's it Worse or better It's crazy You said that And there's like a line invaders in where like Zoom comes back And he's like I treated the fire I made the fire

I came back to help with the fires You made them worse Or better It's a good question It's actually technically true Yeah Both It just depends on whose perspective

It's all It's all a game of perspective That's right That's right That's right son All right All right So we're gonna move on to some questions

Nothing's really happening In the news As far as I know Come come I'm sure there's some bullshit shit happening. Probably right now. It's the same shit different day, really.

I'm sure they're going to legalize air at some point. I think the, wouldn't even surprise me. Al Qaeda is actually airlifting new twin towers. That's right. Yeah. They're trolling us.

They're putting twin towers everywhere. Inconveniently. Right on top of a freedom pos. They drop it right on top of freedom pos. It's like, what the fuck? Y'all didn't know this? They built a metal gear to throw buildings at our planes to make to make us do 9-11s all the time.

They built a metal gear. They fucking consulted Kajima too. And he was like, honestly, I didn't know. Give it normal to read his faces. Yeah,

I thought this was strictly for like, I don't know, art or something. I didn't know they were going to make it. And more importantly, I didn't know that what I was pitching would be scientifically functional in the real world.

This worked. Yeah, like I'm kind of staggered that, that my designs are functional on a scientific level I should have known something was off when

rotting Osama bin Laden who clearly should be dead because half his jaw was missing was talking to me yeah and you know so clearly necromancy exists

yeah I thought it might have just been like a hologram like a Tupac hologram something yeah of like a little mommy He talks exactly that cadence Yeah this is exactly how he speaks by the way

Like there's no hint of a Japanese action at all. He's not a Japanese accent. He's like, yeah, this is fucking... You want to see my impression of Hideo Kiyah Kjima? Hi. I'm Kadeo Kijima. This whole time. I think Walter Gaggans is really cool.

Huh? I think Walton Gagins is really cool. That's what he says out loud. I'm surprised he hasn't taken a photo with him yet. He's always posting photos of like random actors that he knows. Like what is taking him so long? Why are you sleeping on Walton Gagin's? Get Walton Gagins in Death Stranding 2 now. I feel like he's going to be in it.

Can I be? Can I be. be completely honest. No. Well, I'm gonna do it anyway. Yeah. So why I ask? I'm Hadeo Kajima anyway, you know, like... That's right.

That's right. I'm sorry, Hideo. I actually hate Norman Redis. Oh. I hate his fucking guts. I actually tried to make Death Stranding... I actually tried to make Death Stranding completely nonsensical and stupid on purpose because I wanted Norman Reis's career to suffer.

But it turned out that we just made a great game that everybody resonated with. And now we're making a sequel. And now I don't know what the fuck. I'm doing, I guess we'll put Troy Baker in a fucking weird Power Ranger mask with a fucking guitar. Like, I don't know, man. Like, I didn't expect this to take off. That's like what Noddyog did with Crash Team Racing.

Did you know that? What? They specifically, like, their contract with Crash was ending. So they were like, let's just jump the shark and put aliens in this. Oh. And make it a fucking race car game. And then after this, nobody will care about Crash. Was aliens that far off?

That's kind of what I was feeling. You already got talking animals in a fucking haunted mask. He's a god. Yeah. You have a literal deity that gets on his face sometimes. They run around with him. They really want to fuck with it. They should have made it so he was fighting a pedophile.

A pedophile? Well, I think, like, let the woke people, though anti-woke people get ahead of it. So they make Crash trans. Oh, yeah. If Crash was made today, that would have been their play. they would have been like let's make Crash a Trump supporter I feel like Crash would be a Trump supporter

I think Crash has no concept of politics But I think he'd be confused easily enough to be like You might get roped into it without like Trump giving him a lot of happening He'd be like oh yeah I'm down In the same way that you could rope a squirrel Into like a Trump rally like I guess Put a little squirrel hat on it and stuff

It's just happy to be there Yeah Little Maga hat fucking Look that little squirrel, man. It makes me have hope about America. Go, go, go, go. Shit. Man, I'm so dumb.

He's just on the cusp of understanding his limitations. I'm so fucking stupid. I'm so stupid. This squirrel's making me cry. This squirrel's got to make... His squirrel's got to make America great again. And it's making me tear up. I'm so fucking stupid.

I'm so fucking dim with it and dumb and unindeligent. It's crazy. Look at me. You're dumb and shit. Look at me eating my pie, my hot dog, go laughing my ass off at a squirrel. I don't know where I am. Look at me eating my mac and cheese with my hands. I'm so fucking stupid. I got two spoons, but fuck it.

Oh, man, we're going to use the spoons. He pigs it with a spoon and takes it off the food with his hands. Oh, Jesus Christ. What a fucking champ. Time to take a hot bath. And he boils water. He pours on himself. He pours on himself.

It's the Lord. He's too stupid. He's too stupid. too stupid to register pain. Like he doesn't understand that he should be motivated to not experience that. Oh man. That's not even human though. That is unstoppable.

That's not even a human person. That's the perfect army. Yeah, a bunch of people who don't understand that pain is bad. You're stupid as shit and you can tell him to do whatever. They're running that wall right hard. Got it, sir. Boom. He blows up on contact with the wall. And the sheer willpower and belief that

everything will be fine makes it so he burst through the wall. You know? It's as if it's a paper thin wall. He's terrified. He's terrified. He's in the other side, though. He is, it looks like it's,

it looks phenomenal. But he's ready for more, though. I'm so fucking stupid. I'm right back in the fight. I'm right back in there. What else you need me to do, sir? I'm such a fucking moron. He reintroduces himself.

I'm a fucking idiot. I would love if somebody was that. self-aware about really no they can't exist a person can't exist it's kind of like the thing where it's like

if you think you're crazy you're probably not you know because like if you think you're crazy like that it already shows like a level of uh I think I'm fucking insane for years

yeah I think I'm kind of crazy but like that must mean that I'm not but then like is that like a confirmation bias where like maybe I am crazy and I'm just using what I understand about understanding that you're crazy to shield myself against the reality that I'm currently

No, too much thinking. You're already to too much thinking. I think I've been masking for a long time. Huh? I think I've been masking my lunacy for a long time. You can't be crazy and be saying stuff like that. No, I think you can. I think I am.

I think you're thinking you're like some gay book that thinks that you can exist in both planes. But crazy people don't philosophize or pontificate. They don't do that. Well, he thinks he's crazy for the wrong reasons. He thinks he's crazy because he, like, masks himself. But I think he's crazy because when he wakes up, he goes, I do that until every morning

traumatized that fucking girl. Have you seen that giant black dude that's been he runs around the city and shit and he gotten viral for doing his morning routine? Have you seen that guy? No.

He wakes about five in the morning and gets a bowl with water eyes. And then yeah, I don't even know. I guess that's shame. Yeah, hall, yeah. And he just dunks his face and fucking water and shit like that.

And I think it's our turn to do our routines. Right. Five in the morning we get up. The first thing he just ooh yeah just howl at ourselves in the mirror

and dunk our balls in the hot tea I think I okay if you if you if you are you gonna hold on before you before you begin are you going to ask you about deep frying people's testicles no I thought about it

that shit is funny though all right that is funny the audio of it in tandem with the person like going through the voices of pain yeah that's it's funny you

You're fucking fried. So what were you going to say? Do you think, how long do you think you can sustain having your balls in a cup of hot tea? But the tea is poured into the cup while your balls already in there. You don't have to dip it into. I probably jump up immediately. How, you know, could I give you, like, it's like, it. I really don't think I could last long at all.

I think I could do it for like, like five seconds. That's a long way longer than it. I'm not going to end up five. You're really over. I think genuinely the millisecond that you're, You feel that? You're going to jump five feet in the air. But you have to sustain it.

Like you're like, all right, cool, ready, set, go. That's great that you have to sustain it. You won't. And I can do it. I think I can do five.

This is like the pastry that he's like, I'll put it in for like 25 seconds or whatever and fuck it. Yeah. Like it wouldn't be scorching hot. It would be, but that would not mean I would give up. See, the only,

the thing that's concerning me is that he's actually done this shit and that he knows something that we don't. Oh, yeah. I have a massacre to destroy. Like he's just pretending like he's never done it. But like, I think I can. Yeah. You know?

Like, I think I can. I actually think I, I actually think I won't cry afterwards. Yeah. You won't, you don't get it. I don't think Lily won't be upset as much as last time. I don't know what she would do if she walked into me tea bagging a fucking teacup full of hot tea. And then you just stare at her silently as you're doing it.

Yeah. Don't break my focus. No, don't talk about. No way of focus. And then a tapeworm falls out of your asshole. A large one A large A fucking hose-sized tapeworm

That is crazy Just writhing How did they regenerate It's so disgusting Do they regenerate? Yeah they regenerate It's time Kingston It is time

It falls out That's the tapeworm speaking Perfect English King said it's time It's me Hadeo Kajima The tapeworm No relation

No I mean hey It's possible Yeah I mean The stranger things have happened Probably not actually In retrospect I actually think there's nothing

Nothing has ever happened That is stranger than a hose-sized tapeworm falling out of somebody's asshole And saying hello, it's me Hideo-Kajima The Worm, no relation No relation Maybe I don't know

Maybe Amelia Earhart Falling out of your ass Oh no, just her situation Oh, okay The whole plane falls off your ass She's like What the Oh it's me

It's me I've been in his colon this whole time. This whole time. I'm like, how, what do you mean this whole time? What does that mean? I thought you were, before he even, yeah. I thought you crashed in the ocean and then had your remains carried by like migrating crabs halfway across the world. This is a real thing, by the way.

Did they ever find that shit? Amelia Earhart? Yeah. Yeah, they found it like miles away from where it happened because like the, like, crabs were migraine. You said the crab right? Okay. I think that's what I heard. That's the theory of what they, okay.

Look, this is what I heard when I was half. paying attention listening to a video about it while I was playing something else and thinking about other things. Oh, got you. So this might be very misleading information. So that actually might be that Mr. Crabs found her. It actually might be

just a man with crabs. Found Amelia Earhart's body and plane. Wow. A man with crabs. So interesting. Eugene found her. Eugene Crabs. All right. No, it's not, you just On account of the crabs I have. He's not they call them crabs because of his crabs.

No relation. We're big. Big crabs. They're like this big. It's all your pews are giant crabs on it. Big ass crass. And he's just there with them on. See that video with a fucking lady who was like cooking crabs in an air fryer?

And it was like they were live crabs or whatever. She was like seasoning them and you could hear the crabs scream. I think I know what you're talking. I remember a video something like that and then just a wave of people like shitting on her. Yeah. Yeah. It's a Some people can just grow up like really

You know It's right It's really like because look I understand that crabs and lobsters And bugs in general are unsympathetic I'm not My heart's not bleeding or anything But like why

Like why even like I feel like the size matters You know Because you step on ants all the time Probably by accident And you're not really thinking about it Size definitely matters And also I think the level of sentience

Yeah Of consciousness And what I mean by that is crustaceans actually do things that are very reminiscent to humans like say when they're hurt when they're injured they rub their their their uh their injuries yeah yeah they can they they like like we do we're like oh fuck yeah when they get stressed out they rip their arms up just like me yeah they do things that it's like oh these people are very self-aware like you know like ripping your arms up like you said exactly so i there are things like that i'm like just

kill the fucking son of a bitch before you fucking cook it yeah it it it is it is it is air fryer also. What the fuck are you doing putting crab in an air frying? They're just being fucking cunty. Yeah. Like it literally takes a second. There's its head. Knife. Dead. Yeah. It takes a second. And these people are like, oh, let me just do it a lie. Let me put in a fucking washing machine first. As if it fucking makes a difference. Like, you kill it. Why would you do that? Not even a, not even a fucking dryer. Oh yeah. Sorry. Dyer. A washing machine. Put a dryer on high and put a live crab in there. I really did like the washing machine premise.

Yeah, because you're doing it a favor kind of. It's like a cold cook or something. I don't know. I think it's cold cooking. Freezer, you freeze a burger. I think there's something there. Yeah. But yeah, I don't know.

I don't know about the fucking throw. I think all those people, I want to beat the piss out of all those people that do that. And make excuses. The ones that makes you're like, oh, I have to do it for. I'm like, no, I think you're just kind of like. I feel absolutely enough for some creatures. I feel. nothing for them. I don't feel any sympathy.

To me it's not about sea creatures. It just things in general. I just pray to the overlords that made this universe that some beings come and then they do that to humans. I want it so badly that they round them up like you know how there's those claw machines

you know like they put us in like a thing and there's like the claw machine they press it they grab the human and then it dunks them in oil. Yeah, yeah. And then all the humans are talking like this is so barbaric and I'm like nigger is it, it's literally what we've been doing for fucking centuries. What does your watch

look like it's drawn that somebody drew it? Oh, because there's this fat nigga named Lowe that he's a basketball YouTuber and he was wearing it during a life. Is he the guy with glasses that cheated on his wife? Yes. I know who you. You know Lowe? He used to do

I'm an agent. Agent. Yeah. I'm agent. Until they got caught cheating on his fucking wife. Yeah, he cheated. You see this ugly-ass nigger cheating on his wife? It's so crazy. These people, they get a little bit of clout, and then all of a sudden they're just like, I'm going to start fucking bitches. And I'm like, you are without your YouTube channel, you are hideous, sir. Like, yeah.

Why get married in the first place? I don't get. That's the whole other story, right? I never understood that ever in my life ever. It's like, hey, there's nothing wrong with not being married. It's cognitive distance. People, as I say, what they want to, let's say not cognitive dissonance. There's a level of it that they use, but it's like having your cake and eating it too, right?

They always want to do both. I want to be in a monogamous. relationship, but I also want to fuck a bunch of bitches. And my thought was always just fuck a bunch of bitches. Why would you do both? But they just, they need to have both. They're greedy. Have you guys seen the upspike in, um, in the flat earth thing?

I don't care. So there was, um, I forgot the guy that was on. Oh, anyway, hold on. Hold your thought. I just want to say, uh, yeah, shout out to that dumb niggle low. Uh, because he was wearing that, that dumb, uh, adulterer. I like, he's a, I like him as a content creator. He's actually, I think he's very good at breaking out basketball.

Yeah, he was wearing this watch, this sketch watch, and so I bought it. I was like, it looks kind of cool. Yeah, I was just like, holy. It was like 30 bucks on eBay. Yeah. And I was just like, this is the first time I think I've ever coveted something that a, that a YouTuber was wearing. Yeah, yeah. I was like, I need that fucking watch.

It's awesome. How hard could it be to Breaktown basketball? I mean, it's like people, people run around with the ball. The ball. Well. I could do that probably. It, uh, it's, it's funny because basketball seems so simple, but it's like. No, I know.

Yeah. It's funny, because it really The basic visual sympos Like it's one of the easiest sports to follow And a basket Another basket You made another basket Oh he missed

I think all the I think the video of the baseball announcer Where like he They caught him on a hot mic Is a long time ago But he goes He goes it's the He goes the F slur capital

Of the world And I don't know what he's talking about Exactly but it comes back And he goes like Earlier today I made Live on the thing It's like I made some

bad some really bad uh i made a mistake i said something really bad this is not me uh i'm a man of man of the lord i don't do these kinds of things and he's still he's still calling the game though so like you guys like earlier i said something that is really offensive to an entire group of people and i i am deeply ashamed of what i've said and that's a single all the way into the outfield no fucking dude it's crazy like it is i wish i could remember exactly Exactly. I mean, if you said F-Sloor capital of the world, it's probably easy and fine. It must be San Francisco Giants. I genuinely, I think it wasn't here. I think it was like the Chicago or something.

I think it was like, it was so uncalled for. Hold on let me see if I can find it real quick. It is a really interesting audio to listen to. It was just like a socks. It was like a white socks game. I really. And then he was just like these fucking queers over here. The sock was the socks.

They put fucking ketchup on their. Oh, wait. Oh, no, they don't put ketchup on their hot dog, I guess. Actually, which I'm going to be honest. That's the one thing that I enjoy. Reds, whatever the Reds is. I don't know what the Reds are. The Reds?

Yeah. Oh, you think it made me the Red Sox? Maybe Boston? Wait, hold on. Trying to find... That's great. Can I see the teams? Oh, sure.

Bro, it means nothing. I thought it said the... Red C.N. and... Cincinnati in North Carolina. Oh, sorry. Kansas City. I thought that looked like, wow. I think I need to update my glasses.

But yeah, so... Kansas City and Milton Lash, right? I can't tell you how much I say from the bottom of my heart. I'm so very, very sorry. Yeah. I drive myself and think of myself as a man of faith. What's exactly? Because there's a drive in a deep left field by Castellanos.

He's still... That's crazy. In the middle of it. I guess it's just funny to see. He's in work votes, though. He's working. And the producer could have been like, what fuck I'm going to call the game.

Yeah. Call the fucking game. Like, don't bring more attention to this. And the end of it goes like, this may be the last time I put on the fucking headset or whatever. If you said, he didn't say the fucking headset.

This might be the last time I, this might be the last time I wear the, I wear the gear. What? See, out of those cities, that was Cincinnati. Yeah.

And, and Kansas City. Yeah. Cincinnati, I don't know what he's talking He might be having a separate conversation Maybe he's having, yeah, and not talking about where he's at Right, has to be But it's so funny

Because I'm like, when did those cities become the The Great Migration Migration, the Gay Migration I don't even know, so I don't know all the baseball teams Cincinnati Reds, Cincinnati Reds And then the, I didn't even know I don't know, man, Kansas City had a team?

Blue Jays? Royals. I was like Blue Jays, Royals. It's just all Yankees. Blue Jays are Toronto. Okay. There's just a much of Yankees to me. It's just like there's the Chicago Yankees.

There's the fucking Cincinnati Yankees. There's the other New York Yankees that they call themselves the Mets, I guess. There's the Giants to be a team. What the fuck is a Mets? Exactly. The Metropolitan's. Yeah. Look it.

This is. Well, no, it's the subjective. It is. Dumb. Well, no. I'm just saying this. sports niggas fucking help me out. Hi man, I'm Puerto Rican. I like baseball a lot.

You like baseball? More than I should actually. I hate it. Get into it, man. I'm nostalgic for the vibe of baseball because it was always on in the background when my dad was watching it. But like I don't, I don't care really much that much about it. I fucking hated that. I paid. That was my first sport. Did you play, uh, I had to do t-ball and then I had to play.

I did one regular little league. I did I did t-ball for two years. I did literally for two years. I maybe hit two balls. That whole time. I was like, I'm not good at the sport. My highlight was catching. I was always,

if you're in the outfield, that means you suck. Yes. Or you're really good. Like, you know, but if you suck, or you're extremely talented, actually.

Let's put it this way. If you're in Little League, I think it's you suck. Yeah, no talented child. So I completely indifferent, no care. You know,

if you're talented, your first base, your short stop. You know what I mean? Stop is important. I'm fucking left field just like jacking off or whatever. Just fucking.

Trying to like put my fucking glove over my, dick while I'm jacking off, you know, so nobody can see. I see if I can stealthy jack off while I'm on the field. That is crazy doing that, standing there, everybody's watching you're just, and then he's fool. He's fool. He's fool everyone. I caught it.

I caught a, um, I got one dude out. And then I try to make a double play. And then of course, I was supposed to throw it to the, uh, to the stop. But I was just like, you know, because this dude was, this dude was actually really fast. I'm like, no, I'm going to throw it to the, um, to third. No, I was like to the third. I was supposed to throw it to stop. So then he can have the option to throw at home or whatever.

But I was like, you know, like I fucked up trying to throw it a third and I was a little bit short and there was a little bounce and that guy was able I was like fuck And he scored He uh he probably yeah I think he did I'm pretty sure he did I feel like I blacked out at that point

I hate baseball so much I played I played a little bit of baseball I played baseball and then I I uh but that was for like school or something Or like just the community was How do little league teams work? It's just like a It's usually community

Yeah so I did that for the community And then I did like a And a It was like an adult child wrestling Match for the team for the church. Whoa. Adult child,

what does that mean? It means like they pair a child with an adult. Oh, and then they wrestle. And they wrestle. They don't wrestle each other. No,

no, they wrestle each other. It's for the church. Adult. Oh, the new Pope. What? The new Pope happened.

I like how you thought of the Pope when I was talking about adults wrestling children. Yeah, that was the wrestling team. He's from Chicago. I, uh,

yeah. You know, any, It's weird because there were no spectators ever. I'm covering you been assaulted. It's like slowly digging away at the wall. I was like, wait. I hate the.

You stupid victim. You victim. Yeah, Pastor Michael is always there early. I think I'd be. Yeah. I think I'd be a serial killer if I got molested. Oh, curious. I think I legitimately would have went like on a like a spree of like, oh, I'm going to get them all.

I mean, it makes sense. I'm gonna get them. I don't vow it. Because I already feel strongly about it, but nothing happened. So I imagine if something happened. You're repressing something. Or what if I? No, I think unless like, you know, like I said I had a dream that I killed someone.

And then like I was, the dream kind of freaked me out because within the dream, it felt like I was unlocking a memory that I repressed. That's fucked. It felt. It's crazy that your brain would do that to you. Right. You know what I mean? Like it would just torture you. It made me feel like.

Sure you've been wrong. and you really think about it is like, wait, this never actually happened. Dude, it made up this, I made up this anger I had. This anger that I feel right now is not real. Dude, I used to have this, I used to have this dream about this recurring house and it always freak me out because I was like, I feel like one day I'm going to find this house. It's going to freak me. It's going to mean something.

Yeah. Like, what is the, what is it like, what's in it? It was like the same layout every single time. Like, things in the room change, but like it was always like the same kind of hallway, the same kind of, the same number of steps. I think it's like, it's fucked up. I don't want it. I think it's why.

I've stuck to apartments. Do you ever have very specific dreams that actually came true? Yeah. That's the thing that freaks me out. Not like mundane because you probably dream so fucking much. Your mind thinks about so much shit. Oh yeah. And eventually you're going to have this deja vu thing of a mundane event.

But like I had two very distinct things that I dreamed about. Yeah. And I'm like, how the fuck? What the, it just makes me, I'm like, I scientists don't really understand consciousness. And I'm like, yeah, this is where we're at. This is when shit like that happened. I've had dreams that I'm like, I've had dreams that I'm like,

this sounds like, I feel like I really happened before, but then I'm dreaming. And I'm like, holy shit, I'm not even awake enough. Like my dreams, I think my,

sometimes I think my dream, in my dreams, I think my dreams are real. So I'm like, oh, this happened in a dream. It's going to have happened in real life, right?

And then I'm like, what am I doing? I'm dreaming right now in the first place. So I'm worried about my dreams and my dreams. I don't even think I understand what you're saying. You first, so at first, you think you're,

awake. Yeah, I think I'm awake. And then you realize, then you start your lucid dreaming. You realize that you're dreaming. And then you're contemplate, you're thinking about, you're philosophizing about the dream that you're having. The dream, I've had a prior time. But I never even had the dream.

It was a dream of a dream of a dream of a dream. I don't care about this anymore. I immediately. It's really stupid, but it's also like, what the fuck is going on? We're going to move on to questions from our patrons over at patreon. com slash the snark tank. Dream. But the pulp, that happened.

We got to do pulpies from Chicago. Yeah, whatever. He's part. He's part Haitian, Dominican, people don't like that. American Pope, yeah, he's woke. People are calling him the, what are they? The woke Pope, I forgot. Again, what were they calling it?

The whoope. Yeah, the whoop, literally. There was the woke. Really? Yeah, they're very clever, obviously. And then Christians, I don't care, man. They're all protect, they all protect rapists. And you actually look into them, he's protected rapists.

So I don't care. He's a pope. That's all, like, everybody. I was going to say, of course, he's from Chicago. He's from the, what is? What is it the guy say? Rape capital of the world. Yeah.

I'm sorry. I pride myself as a Christian. Yeah, I didn't mean. I didn't mean to fucking... I'm a man of faith. I would love it if his apology was like... So you might have heard me say some... Some fucking crazy thing.

Didn't mean to say that. You didn't mean for you to hear that. I'm just joking. Sorry, I'm kidding around. Niggin, I'm sorry. He says the other... I'm sorry. He's like the whitest fucking person ever.

It's like, eh. It sounds like I know I guess they all sound the same Out of the dessert boy But he sounds like He sounds like Troy Akeman The quarterback

Oh yeah No all the Like the announcer you mean Oh yeah Every announcer sounds The same Especially for baseball Like it's like they hire

It might just be a clone To the same guy Over and over again Because I swear to God There's like a voice For baseball announcers That I swear has been the same Since I was a child

Yeah I mean that's probably true For me listening to NPR like the fucking AMs and like it'd be like it'd be NPR and then it'd be a Brady station for baseball my goddolls and too yeah and I'm like grandma I really hate this fucking sport please put on basketballs and she's like no I'm watching the Yankees this is important it's really fucking crazy I hate how much she loved I hate how much she loved baseball it was like her favorite thing that

wasn't going to church that's crazy what are you looking at I was just looking at the wolf no I was trying to um You see that other guy who was in the running for being Polk, by the way, the Italian man? Yeah. And his name was Pierre Batista Pizza Bala. I'm not, I understand it sounds like a fucking lie that I would make up. Why do they change the Pope's names? Because they're supposed to honor like the, I don't know, who cares?

I'd actually, I have no idea. I was going to make something up, but I didn't even care. And I was like, it should be, Lord's Pope. Leo, Leo, Leo, Leo, Master Chief the Pope. Master Chief the Pope. Master Chief, Pope. Master Chief, Pope, Master Chief the Pope. No, like, I don't...

Double title. I don't know, but like, the... This guy's name is Pierre Batiste, the Pizza Bala. Which sounds even crazier to me than... And they didn't choose that, man? Well, I think they were like, if you're Pope, you have to change your name, and we can't lose that name. You know? That was my thought.

This is like immediately. It's like your name sounds like J.K. Rowling wrote you. You know what's insane? if I were on the council or whatever voting, that literally would have been my reasoning. Yeah. Like, I am not even joking.

Dude. Your name's too cool. I'm sorry, bro. It's the most compelling reason for why he was not true. You know what I mean? His name again, pizza. What? His name is Pierre Batista Pizza Bala.

He's French. He's fucking the WWU superstar. Yeah. Pierre Batista Pizza Bala? Yeah, which by the way, in Italian, translates to pizza dance. This is Pope Pizza Dance How is that not the coolest name

Ever Bala is pizza pizza is dancing That's uh Bala is pizza you fucking idiot I'm sorry my brain My bread chose the wrong thing Oh in pizza Pizza Bala

I wonder which one means pizza Is a dance Oh my little My fucking idiotist Doesn't even know I've had a simple mistake My taught I raised him in Italy And he doesn't even know

I got tongue twisted dude, whatever, man. Raised him on pizza, you stupid idiot, son. I love you, though. I love you so much.

No, so Bala, I think, means dance. Or something like that, you know. Something like that. Oh,

I know Baleigh means dancing in Spanish. I wanted to, I didn't mean to bring this up. But it just has to do with, we talked about,

you said, you were like, hey, you wanted to look of what clear obscure meant. Yeah. Yeah. And.

It means light and dark. or something. Yeah. It was very, I remember you said it was like a, Twilight. Twilight, yeah.

And then which got us on the conspiracy train of Robert Pansson. And I was like, wait, damn, that completely falls apart when it learned what Claire Obscure actually means.

Yeah, it means light and dark. But like, when you look up clear obscure, it does say it translates to twilight, so I don't know what the fuck. Yeah. I guess it probably,

it has like a double meaning, but I know specific it's light and dark and it's also like a technique. Yeah, so it's like an art technique. So it made me sad because I'm, I was like, no, we stringed it together.

Aw. You dumb, idiots. That's so dumb. You look for meeting where there is done. That's so mean. That's what people do in general. I know. Nothing matters.

Everything's going to die one day. You want to see the end of life? You want me to trigger it right now? I have a little button right here. I can trigger it in the universe. Look at this. I can erase New Zealand like this. It's gone.

He didn't even ask. He didn't answer. He just did it. New Zealand's gone, son. What's next? Italy, gone. Their most Pierre Bidiza pizza bowl, sorry. He never existed.

I retconned him. Chow. They're not caught. Chow. Oh my God. He says chow. And he does his little pizza dance into the fucking sky. Dude,

Pierre Pizza pizza. And tell me if you feel this way, because I kind of feel this way. Or at least if I don't feel this way, I'm damn close to feeling it. Yeah. Pierre-Batista pizza ball to me sounds faker than Pita-Wermann pizza Osborne I'd be real It's on the same level It's on the same fucking level

It is on the cut like they are cousins Was pizza mean something? No I think it's just Was pizza mean something? I think it's just what it is I think it's just what it is like Yeah Whatever city claims pizza

I forget they're like oh this is the birth place of pizza. It's one of the cities. Oh, I think you're thinking of pizza, Michigan. Yeah. The birthplace of pizza. Yeah, that's right. I forgot there was a city in Italy called Pizza Michigan. Yeah, if there's pizza Michigan.

I know there is a hell Michigan, actually. There is a... I have seen the sign. It's not just Michigan. No, but I've seen the sign. Welcome to Hell, Michigan. I was in Michigan and I was depressed. Yeah.

I was in there, well, passing through, it was in Bay City or whatever the fuck it was Bay City. Fucking Dragon Balls the ass city, man. It was, it was, it was just so. Welcome to West City. It felt like, uh, it was like, uh, it was just all directions.

Yeah, there was only four cities. I guess. It was, I gotta say, it was a whole city of people. I've seen the ocean many times, right? Obviously. It kind of.

Not all at once. It was, uh, yeah, I'm trying. I'm trying to see them all at once. It was, it was a nerveing to see a lake that big. Oh, like, you're really great?

Yeah. Like, seeing a lake. It's freaky, right? What the fuck? And it's cold. It's noticeably colder by the lakes, too. It's fucking strange. It's like, this shouldn't be, this is not how I perceive lakes, you know?

Right, yeah. Well, that's what a lake is actually. You've seen rivers and shits. Well, I've seen small lakes, like manmade lakes, you know? Like, they're probably in, I don't need to get, well, you can see a person from the other side of the lake. You know what I'm saying? Yeah. But they're seeing, like, one of these great lakes and I'm like,

it's like, oh my God, like, you could kind of get lost in this lake, kind of. Like, you can drift away and not be seen. It's kind of weird. Have you ever seen still water? Huh? Have you ever seen still water before? I love drinking still water, but like I've never, I've never been to still water. Oh, you just drink still water?

Is it still water the city and the water? The outer world? The mock off, the, the, not, St. Row. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Is that right? Or is it steel water? Or is it? I don't know.

I'm thinking of Edgewater. I'm thinking of Edgewater from a... Edgewater. Isn't that the... Is that the theme park or something? No, you're thinking of Edge Park. I thought I was actually thinking of... Can you read a question of this?

We still have to... Damn, I couldn't... It was a hard one. Yeah, I fucked that up. Oh, good. Whatever. We're going to read questions now. For the fourth time.

God. Damn it. So, uh, fucking senior spicy weiner wrote it. He says, uh, what? That's the Pope right there. Yeah, there he is. Senior spicy weiner. Pope spicy weaner the third.

There's been two others. That's so sick. It's so sick. It looks like a taki. I think I would convert to Catholicism. Oh yeah. If there was a Pope spicy weenor, I'm like, oh, you got me. I don't care how many pedophiles you guys protect.

Let's go. So sayeth Pope spicy weenor the third. Spicy ween is crazy. He says, hey, racist Ed Nettie. First time patron, it was wondering who would win in a fight. Grim from Grim Adventures of Billy and Mandy or Norm. Oh, McDonald, that's death from family guy. So just death from family guy, I guess.

P.S., you guys, truly get me through the week. Thanks, guys. I hope we're, you know. Thank you for being a new patron. Yeah, thanks for joining and somehow finding value in all the garbage that was just said in the last hour and 30 minutes. Yeah, somehow you don't want to offer. of yourself after listening to an hour an hour and 30 of this

Pizza I'm still thinking of this guy Pierre Bista Pista I got it I thought I would forget it too but like it just etched itself in it because what the Pierre Batista dude I'm trying to get it stuck in my head right now actually like Pierre Bita Pizza Bella

Bella Bella Bella Bella Bella is Bella is beautiful Yeah it's beautiful pizza is Bella bea yeah Anyway, that's Spanish That's Spanish They say the two L's They say it Yeah, that's why they say polo

Oh yeah They do say polo for chicken But so yeah Grim, I mean Grim Adventures Solo is this I think Yeah, because I don't remember Really much about Oh yeah because he didn't really do

Norm didn't really do anything You just touches people Yeah he just touches people And kills him Like Grim's opening up portals With like a scythe and shit Yeah, I'm Jamaican Come with me

We can show you the underworld Making a Jamaican Grim Reefers There's such a fucking iconic decision. Is there like any subtext of that? You think? What? You think there's any subtext of him being Jamaican? Jamaican, I don't know.

I don't think so. It's probably a funny vocal. It's probably just a funny vocal range. And they were like, oh, it would be cool if he sounds funny. I think they were just like, wow, this is a, this accent sounds so stupid. It's such a stupid fucking sounding language. Sounds so silly and unsurious. And only an unsurious, lousy group of people would talk like this.

So let's just make it Just make it the voice for the grim reaper And then they found out after the fact that like That's real That's real They were talking gibberish And they were like They thought he was just doing like a grim reber accent

I thought the grim reaper accent I thought the grimly Can you imagine a child And your only exposure to Jamaican accents Is the Grim Reaper And then you go to Jamaica And so you just assume they're all death Oh my God

It's not far-fetched either actually It seems like It literally have an experience like that Yeah One profoundly autistic child could absolutely have that experience. The dumb mom goes to the fucking Jamaica to get fucked by a bunch of Jamaicans, you know, while she's cheating on her husband.

Right, as is his customary, yes. Yeah, and then she brings her son and the son's like, what the fuck? This is death everywhere. This is fucking frightening. That's crazy. What the fuck? These are all skeletons. Why are all these black people so fast and death? So you get fast and dead? Yeah, but I think there was a... Grim, he's definitely got it.

I think there was a subtext, too, though, that like, because there was an episode where Grim became... human. We talked about this, I think, where Grimm becomes a person and it becomes a white guy. Oh, right, right, right, right. Because... So he's just like

one of those... He's like a Chet Hanks. Exactly. Well, the reason why they made him a white guy is they didn't want to have a little bunch of little white kids have a slave that is a black man. Yeah. I think they were thinking too deeply about it when they gave him the accent, though, because I mean

it's kind of what you're assuming. Right. Oh. I just wanted to find some sort of a symbolism. Of course you do. I wanted to just dig it out. He's looking for more meaning again. Oh, you dumb little.

Haven't I taught you anything? There goes Hawaii. He's just... And it's not even that Hawaii is gone. It's that Hawaii now has never been. Yeah, it's, you mentioned Hawaii. What the fuck? Hawaii, what's that?

The more you care, the more I take. That's crazy. What about if you go to, if he asked for like a Hawaiian pizza, what do they do? They'd be like, what the fuck you're saying? What are you saying? You stupid idiot, there's no Hawaiian pizza. Oh, did you mean cheese? That's a weird way to pronounce cheese.

Hawaiian? What's that? Are you saying hi to me? Is that Hawaiian for cheese? I mean, Spanish for cheese? Spanish for cheese. There you go. Your cheese is 995.

95 for cheese for a piece of cheese. Yeah, really. Here you go. This is what pizza's always been. Just a slab of cheese. That's hell, dude. Yeah, dude. Oh, my God.

If I lived in a world like pizza... That is crazy. That's so crazy. There's no more pizza. There's only cheese. It's a hot cheese. He throws on your plate. You got to put your hand out and take it.

You got to your head out and taking it fucking Velvita. That was pretty good. That was actually a pretty good... It's not bad. It was like a Tom and Jerry scream almost. Yeah, well. Shut up. Fuck you both. I keep going. Okay. Compliments, seriously. Fuck you.

That's crazy. Damn, all right. I'm so hostile, son. Are you mad about your cheese? You guys ever saw them? I said you guys a video of the guy where it's like, wow, dude. He's like, oh, look, James Charles fired all over my cake. And there's like a cake with a bunch of, like, cream all over it, something like that. And then some guy, and he's like, oh, that was really funny. Me and my husband laughed and about it. And the person that posted was like, shut the fuck up. I fucking hate you.

And then the girl was like, all I did was, crazy your post. Why are you being mean to me? That's correct. Like, I don't understand. Is that the, is that like, a joke just to be funny or? I don't know if it's free floating anger.

Someone's upset. I think everything's, you know. People are just mad. You know, the older I get, the more I think about some people, right? They get free flowingly angry. They're meandering through like the parks and the planes.

Highways driving all down south. Anyway. Sound like a fucking, Senior, uh, senior spicy weiner. Like me. What'd you say? Said you sound like a fucking mole.

Please read the questions. I am reading questions. Oh, he's glazed. It's over. I'm very tired. You already did spicy a winner. Did you? Whatever?

Didn't you already do spicy wiener? Yeah, I was just gonna read it again for shits and gills. For gigs and shittles. Gigs and shittles. Shittling is always a bad too. Shittling? Shittling. I can't stop shiggling.

It means every time I giggle I shit myself profusely until I stop. giggling. Do you know they call me they call me the shiggler. Oh my god. The shigler.

Oh, there he go. There I go shiggling again. I got to write that down. I got to write that down. He's so fucking pathetic. It's worth anything. It's a potential title.

That's merch. It'll be fucking Amaranth in the thumbnail. Amaranth and the Shigler. This is. the shigler The shigler With a full pair of pants

It's like a small guy With a really full pair of pants It's a guy who's got his ass to the camera Or his pants to the camera His back to the camera He's laughing And it's just a brown stain That has to be some drip

Shigler is that two Gs? Yes Like giggling Gotcha But with shit With shit Yes Anyway

Meteorra from 2015 That's right All right, but I was talking about a ghost album. So this is his question. This is what he chose to write in with. Okay. He says, nibbling on weaners. And then he says,

watching the come spray all those turrets covered with baby oil. That's the question. Oh. That's all of it. You're kidding. No, I'm so dead serious. It's crazy. That's fire, though.

That's fire, he says. Well, because, look, we did our job. And it's over. We fulfilled our obligation. Pack it up. Pack it up, guys. Anyway, goon lord Supreme wrote in with an actual fucking question. Oh.

And he says, since you brought up in the most recent episode, I would like you to know that in the movie 13 going on 30, Jennifer Garner's 13-year-old mind gets put in her 30-year-old body. Okay. Oh, okay. So that's what's happening. So 13-old mind, 30-old body.

Does she fuck somebody? That's not worry about that Probably Like there's like a guy that is like Like a What happens in that movie? Yeah maybe there's like a 30 year old that becomes a 13 year old Is that happen?

Is that happen? Is that occur? I don't know. What is? Yeah, yeah, because like, okay So obviously she gets older She's 13 and then becomes Jennifer Garner And then or

A fate worse than the death Or What question? No Jennifer No what are you going to say Would Jennifer Goner get

Do you think She's a Jennifer Goner If she ever crosses me If she'd damn A lot of people don't know this about me But I have a whole I have a deep hostility Towards Jennifer Garner

It's like why What did she do to you It's her and Hitler These are my most hated people Why Huh? Kingston's dad, what did Jennifer Garner do to you? I don't know.

I just think she's kind of a bitch slut. She's in all these movies that I've not seen, and I'm just frustrated that people give her money. Something about her fucking disgusting towel face. Her towel face, holy shit. I don't know what that mean. I actually can't even vivid. I can't even visually picture Jennifer Garner, actually.

Did you see the Deadpool 2? or sorry, Deadpool Wolverine. Yes. Yeah. Is she in it? Electra. It's electric, yeah.

Oh. Oh, I would kill her in an instant. Oh. Oh, finally. I know that dumb bitch. Yeah, I've seen her. I know that stupid worthless woman. Wow, this horror.

You're familiar, you slut. He's so misogynistic. It's crazy. I was wondering, though, like what, because she's always had like a strong chin. She has, yes. Yeah. I was wondering.

You think if she... Jeez, leave some kid for the rest of us. Christ. Jay Leno over here. Do you think she would have gotten wrapped up in the transpanic shit if she would have became popular today? Oh, for sure. Yeah, yeah, yeah. She would have been transvestigated to High Heaven. So wild.

I think you do it now still anyway. They would probably... They should do it anyway. Yeah, they'll keep doing it. Actually, since she did appear in Deadpool Wolverine, I wonder if there's any post. Like, who's that man? Oh, for sure. Yeah.

They made a man electric. Ew. That's crazy. Fucking, I can't believe the Deadpool's woke now. What the fucking wolfpool? Woke pool.

Woke pool and wokeoreen. Fucking wokeies. Wokery. They got black woke till they got Blade woke. They got fucking Gambit woke. They had blade bloke. They just give. I like that they give up for you.

Immediately. They're like, Woke Pool and woke Vareen and then fucking Gambit Woke. They're, They just don't care immediately. After the title characters are established, it's like fucking, who cares? Woke Picard.

X-20 woke-Percard? Wait, no, it's not Picard. It's Professor Xavier. No, it's Picard now. Okay. He's, he's woke Picard in the movie. He's like, I can walk, but I can't do much else. I can do, I could say trans rights or human rights or whatever, and that's all I can do.

It's all I can do. I can't walk, but I can say trans rights. That's my power. It's my powers that I can't walk and I can be reasonable. I have a, it's me, woke a rean. I have rainbow. I woke's my hands. I know.

Wokes. Do the wokes hurt when they come out? Every time. Every time. So stupid. Anyway, anyway, wait, hold on. We got distracted yet again.

God, I've only had a bagel today. I'm 10 cons of tired too. Yeah, I had coffee and a bagel and that's it, which is probably not smart. I have had no protein whatsoever. It's just carbs. Oh, yeah, just carbs. It's just carbs and drugs, basically, caffeine.

I had breakfast, but I'm fucking fading. Aw. So he writes in, so about the, okay, Jennifer Garner's 13-year-old mind gets put in a 30-year-old body with absolutely no memories of the years in between. Taking place in New York City in 2004, this means she has no memory of 9-11 and never questions why the Twin Towers are gone. Oh, that's interesting. That is interesting. That is an interesting facet of that movie. What a terrible fucking movie then.

Yeah, that's like that fucking... Wait, we were doing the show around that time, right? About that animated show, Turning Red. Yeah. Do you remember? Yeah. So, do you remember this? Uh, no.

So it was an animated movie called Turning Red about like... I remember the movie, yeah. Yeah, the Disney movie? Yeah, it's a girl that becomes like a monster. It's like a metaphor for periods or something. Yeah. I don't know. Who cares?

Who cares about women? Women. So... Oh, yeah. The movie. Yeah. The movie comes out and this guy does a review. I think it's Mr. Enter, I think.

He's this very profoundly autistic guy. Sounds really creepy. Oh, Mr. Enter. Yeah. I don't know. Okay, go, keep up. I don't want you really anymore. But so he does a review of the movie and he goes like, this takes place in 2001 and there's not even a mention of 9-11.

And he's like genuinely upset by this. Like, it's a real core contention with the movie that like it doesn't feel. Like it's really of the time because no one talks about 9-11. It's like, my guy. This isn't a literal period piece, you bitch. It's just a stupid movie about periods. Imagine it's a damn. Yeah.

There's a piece about periods, but it's not a period piece. Yeah, it's a piece about periods. It's not a period piece. Shut the fuck up, dude. It's like, I just saw, I saw a, uh, I felt so bad. I almost felt bad for this guy where it was a, uh, GT, it was in the GTA6 trailer. A guy was like, finally a game that doesn't have turn base and have. gay woke vampires or whatever you're talking about balls gay three right yeah most games are in fact

not turn based or woke vampire games i was just like what the fuck dude like how are you that upset that you see a trailer for something you want to play and then it i have to throw in this thing that it's like my guy this why are you so upset oh finally a game with graphics that's insane it's getting to that level so i'm thinking of these text-based adventures it's like you see that andy panty gaming guy. No, he's not so viral about, because no one can tell

if he's real or not. Sure. And we know he's fake. He's just doing it for, but it was just about everybody who's like, oh, you're gay, you're a gay man because he was,

oh, everybody was like, oh, you're gay. Because it was, it was like unanimous. Even like the anti-woke people were like,

all right, man, because he was like complaining about the guy in GTA when he's like, his fucking shirts off in like the beginning, where he's getting in the truck or whatever. Yeah, yeah, he can't stop pre-coming at it.

He was fucking oiled up and why is this so... He was just basically saying... Why is this so hot? And I'm like, it was everyone was like, why are you... This reminds me of The Simpsons when they're doing a test screening for like itchy and scratchy. Like the kids have these dials. It's like red or green like if they like it or not. And this...

And one of the skits, a mussely guy is walking on the beach and Nelson takes millhouses and starts Bing, Bing, Bing, when that guy comes. and they're like I don't get it. Everybody likes it. He's like that one guy really likes the like the musly dude, like that one kid. It just reminds me of like you're focusing on this thing so hard that like what do you think people are going to think? He wrote it. He has a 30 minute video 20 minutes or about that.

And the last 10 minutes are like, I don't know, everything else. Like any guys, when you saw the GTA 6 second trailer, did any part of your mind think about the guy. I forgot there were guys in that game I just remember the girl's ass Like I mean I I thought I was like oh he's ripped Because you've never actually had like a ripped Protagonist yeah he's like a jacked guy

And that's not the modern way Because he has CJ but he's like he's not he's not modernly Sej just like fit He's not like really like a ripped guy You can you can make him but that's not that's not like canon Yeah can't CJ's kind of like a He's honestly almost the same A little bigger than Snoop Dogg

He's kind of thin he's like a lanky kind of guy Is Ryder supposed to be Snoop Dog? What are you talking about? No, no, easy. Sorry, not Ryder. Who's the guy you play inside? Two-player mode? Marcus?

Smote, no. Dom. Finish the questions, please. I can't do this much longer. I'm gonna fade. Yeah, whatever. Are we talking about? He's gay.

Yeah, so he's gay because he was. Was he really centralizing? Yes. He's the only person that I saw to the point where even the anti-woke people were like, all right, dude. Like, literally the guy, just has this fucking shirt off.

Why is that even... Yeah. It's like, again, if you're like, your reaction was like everybody else. Oh, he's jacked. Well, I was also just... And then you forgot about it after that. I guess I did take notice of it,

but mainly because it's like, that looks so real. You know what I mean? Like, it was more from like a... Did you like, after the initial thing you saw, then you moved on to the next thing? Sure.

Yeah, of course. That's what I mean. Like that, like, just like a normal... Of course, it's, there's no... You can acknowledge anything that's happening on the screen. But if you're a...

supposedly a straight man and you're spending hours screenshoting this guy's body and talking about how problematic it is like you're gay no one thinks you're straight sir if you do this for

if you screenshot this guy's abs for hours you're gay it is crazy yeah it's he's so funny he's he's the worst grifter on planet Earth The least believable And somehow he still has an audience

Amen, you know It'd be like that Maybe like a DSP kind of thing Yeah, it might be It might be But anyway, so his question is Oh Because that was just a fact

Oh my God You know about 9-11 But he says I guess my question is How would you explain Historical events or disasters To your 13 year old selves If you were in the same situation

As the movie Oh I wouldn't I'd be like hey Kingston 9-11's pretty bad bad man uh no yugia for a week but but don't tell me i wouldn't tell me nothing yeah i'd be like hey just experience life man don't don't worry about nothing don't worry about me don't worry about that spooky guy with the beard nothing don't worry about that dumb shit don't worry about

that building big uh yeah yeah yeah probably that yeah don't worry about don't don't look into the mudjadine or nothing don't don't don't look into that dumb shit and it's stupid don't read dune that seven years old it's gonna make you a muscle you're gonna do that right It's going to make you a muscle It's crazy. Transfem rat rodin Says, sup fuckers.

After a brief hiatus, I returned with a question from mere days ago. Was I justified for punching someone in the face after they snatched my headphones off off my head in an attempt to start a conversation?

Yes. There is more to say to this story and a reply if you think it's worth it. I don't think I need more than that. Snatching somebody's headphones off Yes. Is truly fucking... It's just rude.

That's like worse than slapping somebody's Yamika off and peeing and shitting on it. No. and then shouting Heil Hitler at it. Hile! That is worse. It's soiled.

It's way worse. I would much rather, speaking as somebody who doesn't have a yarmica, I would much rather have my yarmica slapped off than have my headphones ripped off my head. I want to wear a yamaka. I'm going to have a disagree with you. I want a yarmulak du rag.

That's fire. I don't know how that's going to work, but. Hey man, I figured out. I don't know how that's going to protect. It's not going to be useless as a du rack. Like, is it the same thing. sizes of yamaka it doesn't even work

like it's like a du rag like it's like tied it just looks like it's tied around your head but it's just sitting there the metal one you got the metal du rag remember that that yeah that was pretty cool it's fire um so yeah

are you you're absolutely justified for like you already this is an 100% rhetorical question like this is obvious like you know you're probably proud that you punch this person yeah and I wish somebody would

because that's great to me because that's like kind of snatching you out of a dimension when I put my fucking I headfolded I'm locked in like if I'm walking somewhere whatever I'm listening I am now

if somebody snap you're like no we're fighting I would rather yeah like I would rather you ran up behind me shoved your arm up my colon grabbed my kidneys and stole them from me

then take my headphones off while I'm in the middle of Vibe do a song, you know. Yeah, because at least the song's still going. Exactly. Exactly. At least, like, if I'm in a lot of pain, at least I have this song to keep me comfort. Jesus Christ.

There's some truth there. There's some real truth there. Yeah, yeah. You're a biologist, right? I went to school. I'm a marine biologist. Oh, I went to school. That's why you hate...

So you're like in the military. Read these questions, Chris. I'm falling asleep. Please read these questions. Why are you so tired, sir? I fucking didn't sleep well. All right. You said you're a sleep-in-a-sleeper-

His sleep apnea machine is all stupid. It's giving him more apnea. You had it on the rucks. I'll have it on more apnea, not less. It's just closing my nose. Fucking Lily didn't think nothing. Lily sees me fucking writhing and she's like, look, he's dreaming.

Look, he's having a dream. He's probably dreaming about me. He's gargling his own blood It's a fucking re-apnea machine The machine spawns hands It's choking you and fucking Choking me and trying to make me suck Its own robot

Imagine They made a machine that could even do that Like there's two settings Fix sleep apnea and give you sleep apnea I think that has Nobel Peace Prize shit No Because then it's like you would So

You'd win an Emmy at least. Yeah. Dude, this is how... Look, man, this is the way it works. So the government's going to buy all those machines, right? Of course. And they're going to use them in Guantanamo Bay for all the, you know, all the protesters and all the people that are getting deported. Yeah, all the people are getting to round up.

And so the thing is, the way that's going to work, they're going to torture them with it, giving them apnea. But then they'll take it away if they rat out their rest of their family. So it's like a good balance. So I'm calling it right now. That's exactly what's going to happen. Mark my fucking words. Yeah. I'm sorry that you're dealing with that though.

Whatever. Yeah, whatever. Hey, Mickey, you're so fine. You're so fine. You blow my mind. Wait, I thought your name was Christoph Raymond Gunther rode in. Christoph. I like that.

I like Christoph's not bad, but it feels like that's a poser. I can't do it. Sounds like a vampire to me. Like, that would be a vampire's name. I'm Christoph. It's a German name. Yeah, yeah. And then you do, you bow.

And then you eat their faces after. Yeah, yeah. Then you eat their groin exclusively. It's a very distinctly. vampire name. It's like Dracula or like wrinkles. Rinkles. Rinkles the vampire. You know him, right? Yeah, he's the most notorious vampire. Yeah, from folklore. He's like, uh, he's the original. He's like the Irish vampire. Yeah, he originated in where all vampires originate, Michigan. Oh, oh, um, um, what Michigan though? What is it? Uh, what was it? Pizza? Michigan. Was it? I can't even remember. I think

he's from vampire, Michigan. He's from, oh, shit, that's right. There's a vampire Michigan. Yeah, yeah. Right. So he's from Vampire, Michigan, where they all originated from. Exactly. Vampire, Michigan, Ireland. And then they exported to Transylvania. Like, Michigan is where everything comes from, and then everywhere else kind of steals credit for them.

That makes sense. That's true. It's like how the Chinese invented pasta, but like the Italians get all the credit. Yeah. Whatever. Yeah, whatever. Anyway, this guy says, hello, my big, beautiful boy in his pletka. tonic roommates.

What's the most fucked up thing that was normal when you were growing up? My ass. Okay. No notes. Thank you guys for stopping by. We're going to read the cool. We're going to read. Raw next.

Have you guys seen that? That comment, you were like a raw next. What? Raw next question. Raw next? Yeah, raw next question. No, I've never heard.

There's a video of like a guy being like, what would you do if I was doing this? Me, he's like doing some weird flags. Some girls are like raw next question. I've never seen. It's fucking so stupid. I love those. It sounds like, I'm actually those dating shows where they,

like those old ones from like the 50s where they would like, or like the 60s or whatever, where they would have like, if I was a popsicle, what would you do to me? You know? Oh yeah.

And somebody would be like, I'd put you in a microwave until until there was nothing left but a thick slab of wood. Ooh. He sounds really. romantic. You know there's a serial murder on one of those shows?

Oh, for sure. Like, uh, multiple. I think there's one that's confirmed, but like, I think everybody was, they were all, yeah, they were all serial kids. Specifically fly. What do you think is a perfect day out?

Killing you. Killing you. Killing dogs and his skinny babies poison. Yeah. Oh, you're, you're a naughty boy, aren't you? Yeah, I'm a really bad person. Yeah, I'm actually fucking heinous.

Just society standards. I actually find this very fun and positive. No, I'm actually really fucking heinous. I'm bad. I'm bad to the bone. I fucking, I laugh at fucking, I laugh at miscarriages. Like, I'm a fucking bad guy. Contestant number one.

What is our perfect night out? I'm gonna. He shoots him up in the head and kills number two also. Yeah. And she goes, oh, you've got a loud personality. A lot of personality. I choose him. His brains is everywhere.

They start stuffing it back in the head. That's crazy. And he comes back to life. Well, thank you for putting me. Nobody has ever thought to do this. This was actually the way to fix this. You actually put, you actually got every piece of brain

and you put it all back in the exact right spot and you sealed my head perfectly so now my body's able to heal. If you just put people back together the way you found them, they actually do come back to life no one every just everybody's usually in this situation has just been too

in shock to do it right you crack the code I was congratulations I was thinking of something really funny because I was like I was like imagine you're in a movie right no and like never mind triggered it we're gonna read the rest of this question and then we're gonna end it there's a question that's right

yeah so you guys what's the most what's the most fucked up thing that was normal when you were growing up growing up in Ireland when we used to do any mini-mighty mo to pick people during a game or whatever. Instead of singing Catch a Tiger by the toe, we would... Uh-oh. Of course.

Yeah, of course. I already know what's happening. Of course. They're white. Ireland. Of course. Yeah. What I mean?

Really? I don't know anything about Ireland or the drunk potatoes running around all the time. I don't expect anything from Europeans. Like, actually seriously. Look, man. This is a bunch of starving drunk potatoes running around Ireland. I can't... I can't expect that.

They're Europeans. I can't. Is Mr. Potato Head from Ireland? that racist to assume? Yes. Yes, he's from Ireland? It ain't both. I think both can be true.

Is it really, can you be racist? You can be gay and retarded. Both can be true. That is very true. Two things can be true. If they didn't want to draw so much ire, why did they name themselves after it? I don't think they named it.

I think the white man, the proper white man, not the Irish white man. Not the real actual white man. The less so, a little bit less white man. Yeah, the less one, but they felt more, they were jealous of the superior porcelain skin. Oh, right.

And they made up stories about them being fucking evil monsters and vampires and shit. Yeah, they found one heavy jugged white woman from Ireland. They were like, we're going to take everything you guys have. Fuck you guys. And they called them parchment people because they were right as paper. Yeah. Yeah, man. Yeah, so there you go. They made those

crazy jingles because it's, uh, racism was hilarious back in the day. I mean, it's still funny, but it was, it wasn't funny back then because they were experiencing some crazy shit back then. I guess the most fucked up thing that was normal when I was growing up was probably like the the lack of um and I guess it's not necessarily normal but it was normalized. Yeah. Was like the, uh, the um, oh, a male student got laid by like a teacher. That's so sick.

Yeah. You know? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. For me, it was Islamophobia. That shit was so fucking normal when I was growing up.

It was crazy. Yeah. But that's kind of cool. I didn't Yeah I didn't Luckily my household didn't There was none of that Not in my house

But like In New York after 9-11 bro I got out of pocket That makes a lot It was bad for a while It was like On some level You'd like

You get two days Of maybe being unreasonably scared You know Because that makes sense On some level Where it's like Okay you're freaked out But like

It lasted a while If you were just like, what do you do it? The degree of shock could make sense. But like, hey, you know, Ahmed, the act that, the guy that lived that worked at the fucking Delhi, that has been in America longer than you, Mr. Dominican person's family came here on a boat on like a banana leaf. And you're being racist to him is like, uh, okay, this is weird. Yeah, we understand that people are incredibly retarded. Also homophobia. That shit is still, that shit just recently got became problematic.

And now it's back to being fine again. Well, it is, it is a shame that things are. We sealed up a little bit. We've talked about, people have talked about things regressing, and I've never really, I always push back against that notion. Or I'm like, shut the fuck up. You're just too terminally online. A lot of times, hold on, let me cook. In socially, I'm talking about in things are actually regressing now.

Like, I usually would always push back against that. But now I'm like, oh, now we're seeing the, like, that lady with the go fund. me or whatever. Yeah, there's a perfect example. I think the last Kanye West, we're seeing things. Like the last four years in particular. Yeah. We're seeing things finally. I'm like, okay, I can admit instead of, because a lot of times people are just saying a lot of crazy shit. I'm like, I think you're kind of overreacting. I think my statement will always stand is this. I think things never got solved ever. I just think people started not feeling comfortable saying things out loud. They still thought

that shit. They didn't say it out loud. The whole thing is like people say the, they'll quote, like make racist afraid again. They'll say the people, were trying to say that right now because racism never left, they were just afraid to be racist. Yeah. And that's starting, that's what we need to start with. That's speed degree.

You're fucking weird. That was pretty fast. Like, I don't even know if I can do that that fast. Oh, yeah, it just hurts. Yeah, it does hurt. Start bleeding a lot. No, I feel fucking silly, dude. It's going on.

That's crazy. I feel like I feel like I feel like. How? I feel like I feel like Elon Musk is a really smart guy. Can we all, um, one day just wear those stupid hats and not acknowledge that we're wearing them. We should wear them around our friends also. That'd be funnier.

Well, I don't want to wear it. Like a party we all show up. Separately? Yeah, yeah, yeah, we show up fucking separately. But we nobody, even when somebody asked you about it,

don't even acknowledge. What do you mean? You're like, what are you talking about, man? Like, all my bad, I'll take it off.

It's a smaller one. That's great. Like, the bowler hat guy from freaking what's called the Jeffersons? I was thinking of like a little hair. Yeah. He just gives him smaller, smaller. I just want to be like somebody asked me directly about the hat

and then I'm going to ignore his question and just ask him something else. Start lap him. Like, what the fuck? Why did you have a hat on? Like, are you actually chumps a port on? And he goes like, I'm really not that interested in talking about hats. I don't even want to bring attention to the hat at all. I want to be like, I'm going to ask a, I'm just like, man, dude, it's been a long time as I've seen.

They're like, yeah, yeah, it's, why do you have the hat on? be like, so what are you doing next weekend? You know, like, I want to go visit? You basically like, yeah, I think I'm going to barbecue with something like that. And then, and hopefully they'll take the bait and like just leaving it alone. There was one time I was managed to do that in a conversation once. Yeah. Lillian asked me something I didn't want to answer and I was able to completely dissuade the wrong way.

I did it once. I think you were there for that. I don't know. I don't know what you're trying to get at, man. She asked me about like, because I think someone brought up something and I was just like, someone brought up a creator. I was like, I found it that I think I've, I've, I just. door and then I was like yeah something's happening I swayed the conversation away from me

getting yelled at and I was like oh good job on me I left or I left I left immediately what I do when I know Jojo has like uh like she's trying on clothes and I know there's something that she particularly doesn't like on her but like I'm I'm a male brain I'm like it looks it looks fine to me but I know that she has a particular problem so I kind of have to like Jedi mind trick a little bit to kind of you know because there's no real real way to handle what are you going to be like oh yeah yeah it looks like shit you know no obviously you got to hurt yourself you got to you got to go in the kitchen and just nick yourself a little bit my thing is I just like I just like I'm just like I'm just like I'm just like I'm just like I don't know I think

you know my boobs don't great in this and I'm like I don't know man tit you're awesome so it was matter to me oh like I think that it should just just just your titch should just be out all the time like I don't know I don't understand why you're asking me that yeah I don't know why you put these things away in the first place it's weird I don't know all you think you're hidden man I just let's just let's Let's just not wear anything anymore ever They go to work You might get a raise If you're just tits are just exploding all over the place

I feel like you wouldn't get a raise I think you don't understand the power of tits I Derek trust me I do Oh yeah So then you would know that if your boss Saw some juicy cannons in his face He'd probably be like

I love this No he would walk in and he's like Excuse me I know it's not your fault You didn't know But my wife and killed were killed by tits It's really fucking insensitive My wife was murdered by a pair of great breasts

So I need you to get those away before you get fired That's the write-up Sir, I don't I hope I'm not gonna offend you by asking about How? This is Be on you by your fucking hip really hard Summer of 83 His hands are digging

His hands are like there's like there's a moment Where they go in and you break so much noise and he loads up a little bit I'm sorry sorry I get really passionate about this Your hip is dust right now You can feel your hip

In the bone His finger Your finger's right on your phone Let's read the names Let's get the fuck out of here I need food We're gonna read the names Tich are getting out of control

The Tits are killing the families We gotta bring him to El Salvador I was walking around Lumier and the painter's is painting big numbers over there. The numbers are going down every year. Look at what they're doing with the gesturals over on the border. It's crazy. People say they're not real, but I know they're real. Every gesture should be shined a back in the head three times for security.

We love you. Keep going about the painters and shit. We should. paint even more numbers I don't even know What if we From this angle We hang up a sign

Next to the 33 We had another 33 So it's 3333 and Why don't we send Another painters over there To paint herself Paint different numbers

And solve this thing That'd be insane Why don't we flip the monolith Upside down? so they're not real numbers anymore. No one's thinking about the real solutions. It's all expeditions. Sending another painter's to paint more numbers is so fucking crazy.

We flip it one time and it's two McDonald's. It's two butts and that's too fucking hilarious. We flip it over. We turn it down in tities. We flip it upside down and everybody who's E. dies but no one's so we'll save it

we'll save the world I fucking love you you get it you're the best oh fuck my what the hell I'm celebrating Trump's brilliant idea

yeah that's the AI in my computer being like yeah that just sounds like a better idea for being honest I actually would like the idea let's let's uh contact Sandfall

yeah and be like hey could you um uh DLC you know I know you probably Bobby weren't planning doing anything like this, but... A Trump DLC?

I think the LRUC might be over, actually. Kind of, yeah. NERO D.C. might be over. There wouldn't be a Trump D.L.C. unfortunately, although that would be great. They're smuggling Neversons across the border. They're showing up in big boats. Do you ever explain what the fuck gesturals are? Don't worry.

Yeah. Why would I answer that also? I'm like, what the fuck is that? We're not in a position where we... Experience the world. This town is really interesting. It's the only first time I've been here. I'm six hours old.

Hey. I was it. Experience the world. Yeah. Of, Lemieux. They've got a big guy over there. Eskia.

I call him Eskege. Because he's just a big fat homosexual. Hey. Aw. All right. You need a hug Trump? Don't touch me. Don't touch me.

Don't you fucking touch me. Fucking touch me, you fucking weird person. Don't touch me, you little French fag. I mean cigarettes. I don't mean what I don't like to say it. Some people like to. Some people like to say some people like to say some people are saying. I got a friend.

He's a big businessman. He introduces a concept but says some people are saying this. It is. You hear the comments he gave real to you. He was like, I know this guy. He's a very, very rich guy. a rich, rich, rich guy. Very powerful man, a businessman.

And he takes this... Oh, is it the thing that he said earlier? This fat drug. He takes... He's talking about Osemping, and he's like, I know this billionaire, and he takes the fat drug, the fat shot, and it's not working. He went to London.

He took it. It was like, it was only like $85 there. What? But then he came back here and it was a thousand dollars. And he was like, hey, Donnie, what am I doing? I don't know what I'm doing. I don't know what I'm doing. I'm fucking stupid.

Did he actually say this or you actually did say this? He basically did say this. I'm paraphrasing a little bit, but he said that. You're paraphrasing immensely to be fair. No, I'm not. But he did. He did say. What was the point of him doing that?

I think because he's talking about the drug thing that he's going to do where he's going to like make drugs cheaper here because we're taking advantage of. Which by the way is price control, which is something that they said that they didn't want. They literally shut that. Congress tried multiple times. They were successful with a. insulin. Yes. Under Biden.

Under Biden, yes. For 30 bucks. Right. And then they were like, uh, no. When they were, okay, go ahead. Please. No. No.

I, uh, stop. It hurts. It's not going to, he's not going to fix anything. They're smuggling Ozempic in Nevrons, Indilumier. Renoir, where are you? Renoir, where are you, Renoir? Where's that black guy that died on the beach?

What happened to him? Hey, fucking. He died immediately. Thank God. fucking Andy Circus is like I'm not Renoir. He died on the beach. He died like a dog. Please leave me alone.

He dies so fast. It's really sad. He dies mid-sentence. He's like, he dies like cat does. He does exactly. He does like cat does. Anyway.

He's like, follow me this way. He protects you from dying. He gets killed instantly. Everybody gets killed to be there. At the beginning of that game, it's crazy. That's not spoilt by the way. That's not spoiler by the way.

It's like literally like the very big. It's rough. It is very beginning. I just, hey, you know, maybe. Whatever. Let's read the names now. Remember, you can go over to Patreon.com slash a snark tank.

I want to play really badly. Good. Go over on. Whatever. There's tears over there. One dollar gets your early access or ad free. $5. Gets you a question around on the show.

25 gets you your name right at the end of the show. That's what we're going to do now. You sound empty. I'm tired, man. I'm hungry. It is really hot. It was so fucking hot this weekend. It was crazy.

Oh yeah. We had a heat wave this weekend. Yeah. It's going to drop 25 degrees tonight. Yeah. Good. It was kind of silly how the heat wave. It was like high 90s and I'm like, oh, cool.

Immediately unbearable. Yeah. Let's see what the temperature is going to be tomorrow night. It's going to fuck you degrees. It says Kingston you should kill yourself. That's interesting. That's badass. Interesting.

I'm curious. You got to read the Nate? Yeah. Oh, fuck. Do I be thinking about that fucking, the enfeebled Louis Armstrong Oh

From the beginning of like The one of the recent episodes That the I forgot what I said Yeah Yeah I did I did yeah

That's it You survived the The nuclear blast That's what Yeah That's right Strange things my vision is

fuck I can't see you breathe I only I only see infrared light He's like a fucking predator He's literally a fucking monster He probably looks like one too

Yeah The one actually looks cool seen anything. The what? The new, why? Because I haven't really, Alien versus the Predator has been fun,

but I haven't enjoyed Predators standalone. Like, I was scared. I was like, are you like, frightened or like? I just don't want to be disappointed again.

That looks stupid of me. I'm sorry. Pray is pretty good. I heard, it sounds really stupid to me. It's just a predator if they came to Earth, they went like,

yeah, and then, but then some back of my grandma people were some weird things. Like fights them, right? Or something. Yeah, some fucking...

It should be like a predator movie that's just Jeffrey Epstein hopping through the trees. I'm... It should be a predable when he hunts sexual predators. I'm so on board. It's fucking...

Where he hunts sexual predators? Pizza dance or whatever. Pizza dance. Yeah, pizza dance. Yeah. Who are the notorious ones? Diddy? That, some...

Fogel. Yeah. I was going to say some British guy. I can't remember his name. Oh, Jimmy Saville. Yeah. Thank you. I wouldn't remember that.

I was just looking at... I was just like watching a video. about that recently. I've seen it before, but I was like, oh yeah, I remember. Was that again?

Jimmy Saville, he was like this really famous, like, I think like, he was a public figure in Britain, but he was like,

beloved, everybody loved him and he was like, he had a show, I think where he interacted with kids, and then he died, and then everything

came out about him. So he didn't even, he didn't even face consequences. They had a statue dedicated him. Really? And then they tore it down. I mean, to their credit,

they did tear it down. Yeah, they weren't like, well, it's our history. It's already, It's our history. It's our history.

You know, these statues, these monuments, these monsters, it's our history. I love looking up at giant pewter pedophiles. It's a nice idiom. Or alliteration, sorry. Yeah, yeah, pewter pedophile. Anyway, I'm going to read the names now. Count me down. Three, two, one.

Yes, you did. Three, stop. Three, two, one. Delta Gamma. She oompa. You don't. do this. Don't put me in the case. Don't do this. I actually only touch your penis. What would you do? I beat the shit out of you. Don't touch my penis. The fuck. Wow, that was way more

intense than it was supposed to be. Damn. I felt like I was in 2002 again. Let's go. Why would you be touching my penis? If you touch my penis, you better open your mouth up. Look, man. Andy, there's no context. What if literally I'm walking. I'm walking. I'm walking, right? and then I slip. And I'm, you know, naturally you want to grab onto something. I accidentally, not only do I take your shorts down, but I somehow like, I get another grab. You know, so I take the shorts down and then I grab it. Double, double swipes.

Double swipes. You hit twice double swat. And I don't hold on, but I do grab it a little bit. I realize what I'm touching and then I stop. Yeah. I'd be like, man. This is like this is a path. It's like you can.

It's like a path of no return. Are you sure you want to activate this choice? Because I can either overreact to fuck, but then I'm just homophobic. That's my new class now. I'm just homophob. And possibly a murderer. Or I could just be like, it's all right. But then I don't know.

I know what to happen again. What if that happens again? Yeah. I think it would have to recreate it because we would tell it on the podcast and be like, people need to see this. Why do people keep falling into my colon? Is that fucking Christian? Is that J. Luke?

G Luke Picard I was watching T&G actually And he was behaving like that was really weird Yeah Is TNG yet? Huh? T&G? The next generation

Oh my God Yeah I was watching that And then John Luke Picard Who was like going like Hey I'm captain That show's really good Which show?

Is that generation Star Trek? The acting's pretty fucking good King and Queens I don't know Yeah King and Queens The next generation's really good I really love that show That was my grandma's one of my grandpa's favorite

television shows. It's good. He was a Star Trek guy instead of Star Wars guy. Yeah. I mean, if you want, yeah, like, as far as a show, it's, I mean, it's just it's good. It's a good, it's a great background show, too. Just put it on and let it run, and just kind of dip in and out to it. And then I watched Stargate with him a little bit, but he died. Stargate. Stargate. Stargate

Who died? My grandpa. He loved, he loved shit like that. He died watching Stargate? Yeah, he tried to go. No, I think he had a heart attack or some shit like that. Something's crazy. Oh, while watching Stargate? He probably saw like a, a, Trans person to start get. He was like, I can't do with this. This is too far left here for me. All right, all right. Delta Gamma.

She umpa on my willy till I wonka. I was conservative. Then I watched Chris. Now I hate Florida. Alt left pipeline. That's good. Squimp is bugs. Squimp? Just says squimp is bugs. Okay. Clamule Esquire the third. Usurr, Guildmaster, Mali Malibu. Kulshedra Edras I saw a billboard

for Tim Poole's podcast on a highway near Cleveland, Ohio that makes sense. Colin Moriardi I forgot about this a little Among Us character somehow drawn through text

don't know how you did that No, don't click on it So Perry just sent me a thing No Perry Hull? Yeah, Perry to set me a thing Oh I haven't heard

He watched the podcast Oh yeah that's right Because he did that Crazy art for us a while ago He saw But for like a license plate and it said Bateman or something like that he thought it said

Batiman. That's so funny. And I'm like Perry, what the fuck? You're in fact. I got to hit him up. I forgot that He moved. I wish he didn't move. He's such a fucking cool guy man. He moved when we just got out here. It's funny. He was living in the Avalon when I got here. So he moved

and we moved to Burbank. Like when we got to Burbank Yes. Yes. Immediately. Which sucks. Specifically because you got there. I landed. He was like, fuck this. Fuck, I'm out. Dang, dude.

That makes sense. Cool, dude. He's a great guy. Ka Moriarty. I am going to kill a resin with a mortar. If I was a gay man, I would suck a suck a suck,

suck a suck dick all day long. I'd suck a dick. Oh, that's nice. That's good. It's pretty good. Pretty amazing. Kingston, my son. Oh, Kingston, my son.

Why are your co-hosts so gay? Why? Why? I'm just learning. I don't want to be mean or anything, but like, don't we cook those? They're filming or fucking? What do you think? Or both? What is that? It's Jack Quaid and Carwood. It's been filming. They've been filming season five.

They got the middle finger up, so they're clearly filming. That's what that means whenever the cast of the boys have their middle finger. I thought that meant like this is going up someone's ass. No, this is a symbol. Not every gesture sexual, Derek. I guess. Maybe to you I get turned on it every single thing possible

Stop trying to break my fucking World view I'm a bit of a goon lord one would say I'm a goon supremacist Two rats in a trench coat Kingston's dad manipulating the geopolitical landscape Thus causing Jitler and the Jersey Jevel to team up and annihilate Israel

PM candidate for the ultra thieves Who's the candidate for the ultra thieves Ah fuck where are the ultra thieves from again Oh, the fucking Australia, right? Yeah. Who's the candidate for the... Do you have to be Australian? That works?

I saw this video of this... I don't know, actually. But, like, I saw this video earlier today of, like, this Australian dad and his daughter, like, feeding some Australian bird and was, like, really cute. And then he pans over to a baby kangaroo that's really cute. I'm just like, oh, this is propaganda as fuck, man. This is not...

Australia cannot be like this. Where's the spike? or with a fucking rape whistle I look how Australia is just like Is this the jungle to us? Like I talk to I have a lot of friends

that play cards that are like from different parts of the world And they're like, yeah, America just seems like hell with black people in it And I'm like,

oh, nice. Wait, what are you saying? Hell with black people? Yeah, because we don't have that over here. They don't have black people. They killed all the aborigines.

That's true. The darks of people are all bred in. They all got bread out That's a weird way to say that Kill them all with the Well they're saying it's like hell Well that is a weird thing to say Because you can

It's I guess they assume black people wouldn't be in hell But it has happened to be here too That's a crazy thing Because Bill Cosby exists He's the hell lord You see And whatever

It only would make sense If they were saying like America is like Australia is hell And America is How feature black people So it's like if you were doing like some sort of comparison. Does that make it worse or better?

It's a weird thing to single out when there's so many other things that are unique here that make it worse? I don't know. It's weird. It's hell worse with black people without black people. What do you mean? It's hell. I guess it's the guy. Everybody's just getting tortured, right? Everybody has their own hell, presumably.

Everybody's getting, is that how I, are we going off the lore that there's rings and everyone's getting like butt-fucked on, depending on what they did? I don't know. Wing, wing, hello. I'm not going to, whatever. Derek, the Derek, the Derek pilot has been going on for so long. I'm waiting for the Derek, for the Derek series.

Ha! You ever heard that joke before? No, no, that's actually the first time. That's actually kind of surprising. That is a joke. No, I usually hear things about planes. Like, you did 9-11? Yes, yes.

When I tell people my name in real life. Derek piloted the planes. Oh, you did it. He piloted all three of the plates. Fucking dirty terrorists and they actually call it cops on me and shit. I've been in many interrogation rooms. Yeah. I have one.

I have once. It's really weird. Oh, did you hear? Hassan got killed by ice or something? Oh, yeah. Ice got him. Yeah, something like that. I saw like a thumbnail.

And I was like, I'm not watching this. It's an hour. And then I, which was like, I forgot about this. I forgot about this. It led me to. a related video of Hassan apparently reacted to the content nuke finally. Oh, yeah, because you know what it's... You know what it says?

The thumbnail says de-arming the content nuke. Eight hours and 50 minutes, part one. And I was like, I don't do this, but I click the dots and put not in. interested. Because, you know, normally I just don't click on things. Right. Yeah,

yeah, yeah. I was just like, get this. I had the not interested all this time. So fucking far away from me. How long is the second one?

I know. And eight hour part one is fucking hysterical because it's like, I really cannot imagine, I really can't imagine sitting through something like that. It's unwatchable. Like, there's, you can't like,

I must, I just, even if you, somebody, some freak, I guess, will take, all the parts that stitch it together and make it like

I would rather be encased in boiling snow than fucking hot water no no fucking uh it is it is ice that is boiling to the touch I guess is that dry ice it's something that could only exist metaphysically

yeah I'm totally on board yeah that shit it's a nine hour video that's part one That's my hell, dude It is fucking crazy Sween spits on black people While shitting erect

Reserrecting Mr. Rogers As a Majan so he's just evil enough To kill the right people It's crazy Berserker Broly Big Bouncy Backside The Sloker 2, Why So Derpy? Won't Smith What?

That will Oh Gay That's his response Gay Derek's salty scrotum sauce Oh, I'm Kingston's dad I say white power when I

When you What the fucking Oh, I'm Kingston's dad I say white power When I China Man chop When I China Man chop I don't know what that means Is that the Siegel?

I don't know dude Yeah, okay You're asking somebody with just this whole context as you That's fair Kanye West's new version of Flashin Ice It's called bashing guys Jewish Goku says Jewish Goku says Oeveo

Oeveo Oh that's so dumb I just understood what that is Jews and cars What? Jewish Goku says Oveo Oveo Oh not bad Yeah, that's something

I really understand it until I finished saying it out loud All Hitler with no arena Damn All gooners fire fire at will glaze their Randy rears

it's insane Columoriardi Domo Nation Columoriardi Derek not Chauvin his innocent hashtag free am stray pub in the urinal Colomoriariariariarii check out the band

TriCot specifically their audio tree performance it's the best example of Math Rock just thought just fought a nine year old woman at the park nine year old woman

is insane That's a crazy thing to say I don't like you said it like that just to fuck Like making you feel better about being up a nine-year-old girl That's fucking, that's really funny actually They did have like beating up a child And it's like

It's a fucking 11-year-old man There you go Whatever you got to do to stay alive man This fucking I was walking down the street And this fucking eight-year-old man Stared at me Just like Wouldn't stop staring

So I fucking It's probably eight I wheel kicked them I fucking, I roundhouse his face off. So naturally I I just blew ricin in his face. Crazy. You just walk with that shit?

I blew meth in his little boy's face. I have a little capsule of ricin everywhere I go. Just in case I need a quick out. That's good. That's not bad. I like that actually. It's a good idea. Leaking pre. Colomori already squared. Blonde blue-eyed German man

applying for Swedes position to gentry. the podcast would say the N-word a little less than him. Hired. Hired. No. If you will work for infinitely last year, hired. There's no limit to the pay cut.

Yeah. It's like it is crazy. In fact, at a certain point, you're going to be paying us to work here. Yeah, there might be, you might owe us in taxes. You have back taxes. You need to pay us. Yeah. That's crazy. Sorry, you loser. Yeah.

I like that. Colin Moriarty, woke Marxist Pope. My ass is full of piss, help. Thugzilla versus Kingston's dad. Losing all my friends in the custody battle. Colin Moriarty, Swin confused between his hallucinations and life. Colin Moriarty, Kingston's dad

convinced Kanye to be anti-Semitic. Jack W.F.M. Ultram Mega, dumb, stupid, and idiotic Beatles going X-Games mode against the big gay bug invasions. Hate. Yeah, you don't like those beetle ones all that much. and I say hey

it's a botty boy kind a day column where you're already Sween be like belliger twin powers activate shape of what the fuck is the shape of big black retard

Derek will be like form of cum yeah why not sure why not form of cum that's embarrassing I would never transform into cum yeah what is I'd never do that. Only a fucking cringe loser would transform it to come like that.

Okay, how about a sperm? Fuck. That's pretty base, cool. I don't want to get eaten, so I'm not going to do that. What if I turn into a cum, then I turn into the cum that's about assimilate a person? And then I'm the cum that I get chosen to insominee. Does it become another me? Oh, there goes kicks again, talking about cub like he always talks.

Oh, my little gay. Comey son. My little botty man, baby boy. My little cumuloid. My little cumuloid. Cumuloid. It's really fucking out. me, it's really fucking hour by.

I will press charges over Kingston's molesting me. Big meaty stinks. Kingston's dad caused the Permian extinction. My beanar is large. Trust me. Andy, the man who's handy is an hour back to S here and forever dandy. Tom pooped the bed Sweeney. No. You okay?

Yeah, yeah. Would you rather give birth to Purchase O'Neil every day or eat your vacant food once? That is... It's insane. Wait. To make your food's delicious. Wait.

What the fuck? Would I rather have delicious food? Or burn? A grown man. A giant man. Every day. Every day.

I don't know. O'Neill is a very large human being. I do feel like it's closer than you think it is. In what direction? Not because. Am I delighted to birth, Pertice O'Neil? Yeah, it's actually a great feeling. Oh, see, see, now you got me thinking.

Now you got me thinking. That's hot. My mind, my mind is open. Finally. I'm going with Pichison O'N. I think I might birth Precious O'Neill. That's so fucking stupid. That's so insane.

Heath Smoker, Heath Smoker calling Moriarty, cowboy Eddie kids Cowboy Eddie I'm a better man than you Rick Dave Blunt's getting stuck In an elevator for real Episode 400 is

Lily Jojo and Chris's cum sock That's mean Damn You still got cum socks man Yeah man of course I'm wearing them right now That's why his socks Look I'll take him off

I'll stand up That's crazy They give me extra reinforcement In the winter talk I would not feel good I'd be wearing my shoes In your house I've got him of a worst shoes

in your house now. So would I. I would just be like, dude, that's, you buy other socks. I've never come in a song. The, the prospect of it was really unappealing to me. It's not, I feel like when tissue is really easy, accessible. Yeah, like, why?

I had come socks when like, I would have spare socks for that. They'd never touch my feet again. You bought socks. You bought socks specifically to come in? Bought socks. I had socks that I used for socks. And I was like, right, these are going to be my cum socks now. They're a little worn out. See, my thing is like, you know, like usually people's bathrooms are pretty close to their rooms.

You know what I'm saying? Like, why not just grab like some tissue? Now you have like, like. I was being off. My bathroom is in another building. You're being on the hallway, bro. My bathroom's in another building, sorry. All right, fair enough.

Dave Blunt's stage dive tsunami. Oh, that nigga might, uh, cancel his tour. Oh, why? Why is he dying? Well, yeah. Well, yes, but like, why would he cancel his tour? from being so out of shape when he was like meeting fans

he got sick because naturally right you're meeting a bunch of people and so he ended up in the hospital so we'll see like oh damn what happens which honestly it would actually make me feel better because like I was already contemplating on

trying to get my money back because I feel a little weird that he's all oh I'm supporting Kanye and I'm like this is kind of this is kind of This is kind of like weird. Like, ethically, like, this is not okay for me to go to the show anymore.

Yeah, yeah. You know what you that dude's go to ethics? Don't those shit's away. Like, it's so. Huh? Anyway. A little high, little low. Come little, little, come little blow.

Disney's, that's so gay men. That's so gay men. That's all right. That's not bad. It's not terrible. I've heard worse. Yeah. You can see gay things happening before they happen.

It's the penis. I can see that's so gay man It's so deeply buried inside of me Yeah Yep I'm gay I don't know I wish I knew the song I can't like

I can't hear what you guys are doing Yeah I'm gay That's crazy That was so perfect There's nothing special about that Because I know everyone would have done that exact same job I know but it is funny It's not

It makes me sad. I don't know what you guys did. I'm going to go listen to it. I'm going to go listen to the whole song. You can make a gay version of that song. I can be our next gay cover. I felt like it sounds like you got already did it. I fucking type that so gay men.

I love when my brain does that. That's a Raven theme. If you could see into some penis, penis. You can seek into the future. Yeah. I want to get to the end. though. That's so gay man.

It's the penis I can see. It's so much penis It's at me. Wait, listen. Yep, that's me. Yep, I'm gay. I used to love I'm gay. Apparently that was one of the most

popular Disney shows ever. That makes sense, yeah. I don't, I don't, I watched a shit ton of it, yeah. I mean, I love the show, but I didn't think, like, I didn't think people were watching it like that, you know? That's where... Everybody that I knew was clearly. That's where Corey's from, right?

And all I don't know. Brown. Yeah, that's where Orlando Brown from Famous Corey from Corey in the house is from Randall Brown, right? He's all fucked up. Yeah, he's fucking, yeah, that wasn't Corey. Orlando Brown was Eddie on Yeah, wait. So that's a different show? No, it's the same show.

Oh, okay. Corey's Corey's Corey. Yeah, Kyle Massey is Corey. He's from that's Arraven. Oh, his name is Kyle Massey. Yeah. Yeah. He's really, it was Kyle Mass shooter, but he had to change it. Yes. That's fucking so crazy. That's so insane.

said you're not going to get far in this town with that name kid Listen here kid You got some talent But you can't walk around with that name What about Cal Messi Sure, whatever you're Warmer

That's crazy You're stupid little black bitch Don't talk to the underage women later on your life Oh They should make it Is that what you did? Yeah They should make a spin off of That's O'Raven

Called them I don't know That's so like I don't know Eddie or something And he has visions of the past. So memory? You fucking idiot.

You fucking jackass. He's like, he had visions of the past. He's like outside and he's going, he's about to. He's having dementia episode. He's outside and he's going to go see a movie with his friends. And then it just, and then it just,

the camera goes into his eye. And then it's just like a six year old him falling off a ladder. And then it cuts back to the show and it has no bearing on anything because it's so far in the past. He's like, wait a minute. I fell off a ladder when I was sick. He's like, yeah. Anyway, we're going to see the movie?

And he's like, yeah, I guess so. So he just has dementia. No, he just remembers. He just remembers. That's it. That's his power. He remembers. But not even well.

Not even well. Finally, a TV show that answers the age old question. What would a person do if they could remember? I feel like if you pitched that show, you would get the piss beat out of you. Like, I think like, like, like, execs and stuff would actually like pick up their chairs. Yeah. And the executives,

they would not beat you a paddle to have on it for some reason. The executives would literally, they would quietly, they would like, they would hear you and they would be, you'd be in the room and that you'd be like, so that's my pitch for that's so Eddie or whatever. Yeah.

And then this is exactly how it would go. The guy would be like, he would completely undress. Yeah. Down to his underwear. Ah! Charge you. Charge you.

Farrell. Like he's so, he's so, he's so predicate. He's fist. visage looks different. Like, he looks like not a person. Is he that Dan Henschel guy?

The dude who like fucking paints himself and does all those weird videos? Oh yeah. I say that video, right? Of him coming on his phone. That was the first thing that I saw on this show. You pan the thing and then showed him coming on the camera and I'm like, that better not be real.

It's probably real. That guy's committed. That guy's funny. He's playing crazy to the point he's going to be lost. What's his baby's name again? A loaf sun loaf? Yeah, sunloaf. That's it. There's a couple other ones, too. He's definitely sick.

He's crazy. I saw him dress as Jesus hang himself and it like pissed off a bunch of conservatives. Of course. Even though he's clearly like, look, I don't know where he leans politically, but he's clearly not like playing favorites really.

Like he kind of does whatever. He's just some fucking crazy asshole. He's just like an actual crazy person. Yeah, they're like, I can't believe people are dressing like Jesus. And it's like, this guy is insane. First off, that's like saying, Oh, I can't believe I can't believe someone out there killed a child

You know, like what do you mean? Yeah Of course He's sick What are you new? I just selective What are you fucking new You fucking baby

Selective Oh I'm mad now for once And then I'm not gonna be mad about literally anything ever again I don't care Yeah Everything else is fine Everything else Everything else in my life is so fucking peachy

But now I saw this dumb comedian Oh I'm so mad No one's gonna, I hate that people like to dress as Jesus. Yeah, like this the most highly offensive thing out of while this motherfucker's at a church fucking a child. Yeah.

How dare you? On live TV. Kevin Durant's feet. Hold on. I'm busy. He's crazy. I'm busy. The pop of the kid. Kevin Durant's feet, wait, I thought your name was Christoph of Raymond Gunther. Do Marcellus Wallace, Fiafessi

and Batimandem. I don't know what I don't know. Do Marcellus Wallace and do like that line? I already read it I'm not done it I'm pretty fucking far from okay man pretty far from okay about the boy

I'm pretty far from okay as asshole dripping out man the coma spilling out if they pan the camera down somebody's dropping a bunch of ice smokes and ice cream on the floor it's crazy and fucking Zed's like up there just fucking he's just

he's laughing up he's still live you know I ain't paying my TV license I'm playing my TV license bitch, Mr. Pants. What happened to the Halo show video? It's uh, I got it. I have it. I have it.

Don't worry. I have the master. Oh, you have it? You stole it? Yeah, I have it. Dang, that's crazy. I saw it. Actually, I gave it a Kojima. I'm actually really worried. I'm scared of it because it's so long and I'm like worried that like my computer's not going to be able to render all of it. Is it eight hours and 50 minutes? It's not, it's not. It's not. several hours.

It's less, but it's, not much less. It was, it was over two. Oh. And I cut it down to about an hour and a half. Man, that's a lot of, it's a lot of cutting. Yeah, there's a lot of cutting. You cut out all the sex scenes. Yeah, I cut out all the sex scenes.

I cut out, um, is there like a 15 minutes opening homage to Master's Sheep's penis? No. With the, uh, but I do want to film something, uh, at some point. I mean, not today, certainly. but like with you guys for it I'll let you guys know what it is you gotta do the halo theme showing his

his penis you know it's just going in a circle and the theme song is 10 decibels louder than like any you talking or whatever I have an idea right I have an idea

okay great well the idea is this right it's pretty much an image of Ravis T's penis spinning around and then he comes but he's spinning so fast that looks like a halo. Fuck face unstoppable.

Cardboard pie. Aragorn cutting out. You know who's going on while? It's a good idea. Compete over who can dome the most IDF soldiers. I'll let you borrow it. Cinnamon toast cock. Thank you.

Jolly old dipshit, the ace of parades. Every time Joel is hit, he becomes Nigel Thornberry for one frame. That's so smashing. That's pretty good. Playing with my microbeetle penis and you can't stop me. Big bag penis.

Colin Moriarty, uh, deep sea beetle. There's a lot of beetles now. Disturbed be like, Hamas, they tried to bomb us. They tried to blow up our shows,

so we must go explode all the children. Michael Vick fights crypto the super dog and beats him badly. Colin Moriarty. Sad gay little beetle squeezing his beetle balls until he feels something. Search Peter Lorry Fish Battle. Colin Moriarty,

I can't drown my semen. What? I can't drown my semen. They know how to swim. I don't know what that means. I know what that is, but I get it. I can't remember. Big Gay Beetle guzzling cum like it's sugar water. That's hot. Smitchie the kid. Bam has beef with other col, with other Colin Moriarty. Colin Moriarty, Columori, Post-Clarity Nut.

From hell's heart, I come at these. Star Coffee. It's another day. Another day. Another day. Another victory for the OG. Yes, or Arafat, Cock. Yush, I'm King. I'm Kingston's dad.

And I just don't understand. BLM. All lives better. Clearly, I'm Kingston's dad. Kingston's dad. Empire prostate of mine. Can we get Kingston's grandma on the podcast, Craig the Canadian, the Guna Bomber?

It's your boy, Shawnee Dee, and I have transformed into the ginger version of Colomori. We already come shot gaming. TM at Grock. Is this true? Serberus Agent 267, Colin Moriarty. You ever think? Yeah, me neither. Lillian Moriarty, Colin Moriarty,

Jojo asking Sween to borrow some melanin so she can use the N-word around Derek. Colin M.H., the Lord of All Moriarty. Oblivion remastered has made me convert to Christianity and pray to God every day for a New Vegas remaster. That'll happen. You'll get it. Eventually.

Although that game is apparently like, I mean, I do notice that it runs fucking horribly. Yeah. They got to fix that shit. They'll figure it out. Yeah. It'll be out in like 2030. Yeah. Oblivion remastered remastered.

Yeah. The Centurian commanding the 100 guys against the gorilla. The Centurion. Columori, Obi Wancho Blombe, T.R. I want to blow me. Waiting for sweet hunting tier I want his pelt. Collimori. Cremlin to Gug, glug, glug, glug, glug, glug, glug, glug, gu gullub. Nice.

Colin Moriarty, ninth level wizard evocation spell, itchy colon. Biggest Borderlands fan finally has hope for the future. Yeah, game looks good, man. Kingston's dad voice, my baby boy, come meet your new stepmother. She's a falmer. Don't be bigoted, my son. Wage Slate 583, big gay son. Or black gay son.

Won't you come and blast away? my ass by pound garden pound garden is pretty good pound garden not bad kicks his dad's favorite song Pepini brothers

Jeffrey Epstein in the Minecraft movie like I am steen don't dunk dunkerson the colon swinging slasher jury from street fire giving me a syrupy foot job under the table of a Denny's

it's 2 a m p.p in Spider-Man 3 emo Peter says shalom when answering the phone this is to show that he's evil now fuck I was curious that's curious timing

what does tamarini mean by this yeah we must examine this something uh colin moriardi don't judge me this is colin's own joke from an old game over greggy show

oh colin mori farty uh me be fishy limp biscuits and gravy colin moriarty uh john strickland marks 1889 they understand the things i they don't understand the things i say on twitter uh

the first church of colinori if you drinky David fucking Kingston's grandma What? I don't know man What is that? Look man Like smashing or like

Are they upset Like fucking Kingston's grandma? I think it's smashing But like I was hoping you're gonna Because I gotta get that demented Wrinkly Granny Snatch he says Oh well

So I think that that kind of sells it Yeah you did You know Certainly a choice That is an interesting I guess This is the same person I want her on the show

No, because somebody else said that, I think. Okay, I thought maybe. Pre-Raz, Blake 896. He pledged twice. Yeah, it's hilarious, isn't it? He has two $25 tears to say both those things. That's crazy. Ask Creed enter Anus, Sweeney, tearing it up in a bowl of Kohl-Slaw.

Demon Days is now officially 20 years old. That's fucking crazy. Das Goopi, Kanye stole the action, the action inward thing, like two days after that episode got posted. I don't even know what that means. Come on Eileen by Dexie's Midnight Runners Shot young Kalamoriardi Sergeant Johnson versus three gorillas Fermented Pygmy

Working out a prototype talking Kingston's father picture frame That'd be amazing Some dumb ass Sorry Miss Jackson badly brave Dog the baby hunter Aetherian needs help Waving his lower

Wapening his lower I said Lowering his weapon in Halo 3 Penis Nafram Melfis 1 And rounding out our list Oh my God we did it We did it. We got through somehow. I'm so fucking hungry.

Come on, come on. What's that? Is that? That's Shrek. Yeah, it's counting crows. Counting come, yeah. Counting come. Crazy.

Is it counting come? Counting come or coming crows? Counting come. Counting come? Because I like the idea. Coming crows is also crazy, too. I saw the biggest, it wasn't a raven because it didn't have like the, like, the ravens look at a little bit different. But it was as big as a fucking raven.

It was, I was at the gym. It was a big, dude. It had to. I was just like, what the fuck is that thing? We lived back home. One landed like on my leg and I was fucking mortified. Because they're all over where we're from. Like all over. It just was brave enough to just land.

It just landed. Because those they don't, they're, I forgot which ones are the ones that are like hyper social. I think it's Ravens or crows. I think crows are hypersocial. Pros are, I've seen, I saw a crow. It must have been New York barter with a dude that has like a little stand. Yeah.

Whatever. It was like bartering. The guy was like offering it food or something And I was like no I don't want that And then he offered him like a bigger piece And the crow was like yeah Like it took like the bigger thing I'm like what the f And fucking landed on me and I was like

That's crazy I can't even imagine Do you have something you need to tell me? Yeah You're fucking you're dead You're cooked nigga you're cooked You're dead and gay They're pecks inside my fucking eye Turns around like this

He's good You're fucking dead now Either make me Your ally, you're fucking raped stiff. You're making a choice. You're raped stiff. All right, we're going to go now. All right, no problem, Mr. Gru.

I need fucking food. Bye, everybody. Come on, come on.