The Snark Tank - #354: This Guy REALLY Likes Korn

Episode Date: September 5, 2025

https://www.patreon.com/TheSnarkTank

Want to earn extra income for your business? Amazon Hub Delivery is looking for ambitious business owners to assist with local deliveries. When you become a partner, you and your staff will deliver packages to customers in your area on a schedule that works for you. With each package delivered, you'll gain extra income and exposure for your business. Plus, Amazon Hub Delivery makes it easy to get started. There's no upfront costs, delivery experience, or long-term contracts required. Sign up to learn more at Amazon.com slash Hub Delivery. That's Amazon.com slash H-UB delivery.

Hey, it's Ryan Seacrest for Albertsons and Safeway. Ready to save, it's time for cyber deals. Put a spring in your step with fresh savings that brighten the season. These exclusive week-long digital offers on your favorite products are only available when you shop online. Save on eligible items from Kettle, Chobani, Quaker, Skippy, Hidden Valley, International Delight, Frito Lay, and Signature Select. Available now through March 24th on pickup or delivery orders only. Restrictions apply.

See website for full terms and conditions. I think the solution is to give children guns only. Yeah. You know, like, you can't just give guns to all people, like adults. Adults have proven themselves not worthy of owning guns. Because what do adults do with guns? Wars. Children don't start wars.

They don't. With guns. They kill other kids maybe a little bit. Yeah. But, like, that's not like a war. Yeah, they just need them for purely self-defense because they keep getting blasted in schools. Yeah. And they just need to defend themselves.

And I think that's what the Second Amendment was actually for. I think what we need to do. To protect yourself from a tyrannical school shooting. In fact, I would go even a set further, I would say, especially in red states. Yeah. Just to see, right? I think we should enforce guns. Yes.

Guns everywhere. Yes. We need auto turrets in the hallways. I agree. Every kid should have at minimum in AK-47. Yeah. With a polished wood handle. A good old, like 70 style.

Yeah, 70 style. Like an uncharted two kind of weapon. I'm liking it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It'll be very safe, I'm sure. I think it would be a stalemate. I think that theory works. Yeah.

If every single one of those people have guns, absolutely nobody can afford to fuck around. Right. Now, will there be the occasional kid who accidentally pushes it and takes out three other children? Sure. but that's not as bad It's not, it's a lot less than Some fucking dumb idiot

With a bowl cut Like come in Swiss cheese and like 20 of them It is always a bowl cut Yeah, I don't know why I don't know, there's something about it There's something about having that hairstyle That drives you insane It makes you want to

As soon as it's finished Just kill, kill, kill, kill That's why Rockley from Nardo always freaks me out Oh, good to you He's like the bull cut guy Yeah, I unfortunately don't know who that is It doesn't matter

It really does not matter Welcome to the StarTang podcast. It's me, Chris, it's him, Sweeney. Look at him. He got a busted lip. His wife beat him up. Yeah.

And that's Derek. That's me. Look at him. I'm blind. Yeah, he's blinding. Feeling good, though. Are you any better at piano now that you can't see? I actually legitimately feel better at piano whenever I put these on.

And I'm like, I'm blind. I intuitively understand all the keys. Right, yeah. Like before I always struggled. I'm like, ah, which one's? see which one's uh and then i'm like oh i get it now yeah it's weird it's weird how it works like that it is crazy how it absolutely works that way yeah i'm also as i'm getting older i'm getting a little bit better at the harmonica oh like say by the time i'm like 80 i'm gonna be a fucking

master at it because for whatever reason all old people are fantastic at harmonicas old men yeah yeah i remember i dude i used to i used to have a harmonica when i was kidding i remember really liking it and then it mysteriously vanished one day and i'm pretty sure my parents just got sick of hearing it. What's his parents doing that shit, bro? It's like, oh, I must have been a ghost. My parents swipe my fucking fake Desert Eagle.

Well, I mean. Like, look, look, to be fair, even though they could have just talked to me about it, I did cut off the orange tip that, you know, differentiates that it's an actual toy. And it also, if you put batteries in it, it made the Desert Eagle sound. So it was a really cool toy.

I spent my, My allowance on it. Like an eagle sound or it made like a... No, the desert. Yes, it made a desert eagle sound. Because it's still ridiculous because that's such a gross sound coming from like a fucking 1999 toy that's with the dumb as stupid speaker that sounds dumb as fuck. It's like blam.

It like... It peaks immediately. It peaks immediately. Blam. It wasn't, it actually was pretty decent. And I feel like that was the. reason why I never saw those guns again. Had a subwarfer in it.

That'd be crazy. I think there was one of those things that didn't last very long for a good reason. Yeah, the toy Desert Eagle, I would imagine. I never shot a Degal? No. I've never shot a Desert Eagle. I had a chance to, but it fucking scared the fuck out of your way it popped someone's arms up. I was like, no.

I'm not even really convinced that they're real guns. You know what I mean? I don't think people really ever used them. I think they exist. People didn't use those guns. That's what I mean. Like, they don't feel like, I don't know, to me, like a gun is like, that's a weapon of war. You bring that into a, you bring that into like a battle, like a tactical battle.

And a Desert Eagle doesn't seem like there's any tactical advantage to it even slightly. All of all of the 40. It'll kill you if they get you. Every 40 and a pistol for me is like, no one used this really. Like these are not real. These are guns for people to have to say it to have a gun. All crazy guns are pretty much military, you know. Not even in the military.

But like, because like have like all of the like the. Well, it's not, it's not necessary. It's not practical to have. Right. But I think it's like, it's kind of like, um, I think a lot of people probably or will bring novelty guns with them because it's just why not. And all to also say that like, oh, I killed this, you know. Yeah.

People, people. I killed this haji with fucking dis Eagle. People shoot. People shoot them. But like I don't, I don't see. I don't like, my brain can't rationalize. using a 40-up pistol. Like, I don't know

what those caliber pistols are used for. It's like, what do you, they shoot six bullets. They're crazy loud. They're unruly as fuck. They hurt. Like, why do you, why do you have this?

There's no gun that's quiet. Yeah, but like, even comparative to, like, even compared to like a fucking a nine or the 22, like they're loud air. They scream. Yeah, they're eagles. Literally, yeah.

Yeah. That's what they do. That's what they do. Well, listen, guys. Nothing's going on. Trump is currently, like, as we're recording this, he's doing his live address. He's probably going to announce that his anus is bleeding,

and it won't stop. I think he's going to announce that he's dead, and then he's going to die. You imagine he just crumbles the dust? That would be... Like Marcus's dad. That's crazy. That would be so funny,

because I'm like, that... Am I dead? Am I? That didn't happen. Are you dead? Am I dead? When you see something that ridiculous you're going to have to question if you're even alive. I got to wake up.

I got to try to wake up really quickly. I get up before I get trapped into this dumb dream. Yeah. Well, listen, before we get too deep into this, Patreon. Atcom slash your Star Tank. Remember, you can go over there to support us a wide variety of tiers,

a wide variety of perks, early access, ad free, exclusive episodes, all that stuff. I'm going to take, I need to address the audience for a second. This is the first question that we got this month, right? For the month of September, for the month of September, 2025. It's got 10 up votes. Awesome.

So the community saw this and was like, yes. Okay, cool. This needs to be asked on the show. I love the community. Okay. So carpeted microwave rode in. Cool. Insane name.

This is good day, gentlemen. Could you fart so hard your balls explode? It's a good one. Amazing. Yeah. Yeah. Ten, ten like... Ten up votes.

Ten up votes. Very. very important. Fart so hard your balls explode, eh? So that implies that some of the... You gotta be sitting down clearly. Like... No.

Oh, it's okay. You're more creative, I guess. I mean, it would almost imply that for them to actually explode, not just feel the force of it and hurt your balls, but explode. That would either have to be, like in this gentleman's predicament,

maybe he actually gets it doesn't go through his anus. The gas gets trapped in his his ball sack. Right, right. He sewed his anus shut. Yeah. And so the gas could only go. Yeah, it's got to go somewhere. Naturally, it goes to the ball sack and it explodes. Right. Right. So that's how the body works. It absolutely does. Yeah. You know, like the prostate's like, hey, it's like a train,

they're like deviating, changing the tracks. Right, right. It's like a trolley problem. Yeah. So it's like here. Go here because we, got to get rid of this, you know, like it's too far down to go out the mouth. So, uh, that'd be crazy. Like, what if you could do that? Like, you're like, shift the tracks? Yeah, shift it.

And then all of a sudden, like, would benefit with that. You'd essentially fart out your mouth and that would be horrific. That's, so some good theory crafting. Yeah, well, carbon-and-up building right there. That's like some, that's a... Hello, hello. I'm Malcolm Gladwell, host of Smart Talks with a... IBM. I recently spoke with IBM's new director of research, Jake Embatta. We discussed his vision

for the future of quantum computing. At IBM research, what we always do is answer what is the future of computing, whether it's coming up with new algorithms, coming up with better AI, coming up with quantum, or coming up with just how do different accelerators go together. It's our DNA to answer the question of what is the future. Isn't it a perfect problem for IBM because you kind of need to have a legacy of building stuff. Yes. Building actual physical machines. Yeah, it's why I came to IBM.

I wanted the experience, the culture of building hard things that others have not done before. Where do you imagine we are in the timeline of this technology? There will come a point when it will mature. Right? My cell phone is a mature technology at this point. How far are we from that point with Quantum? By 2029, we'll build the first fault-tolerant quantum computer. That is one that can run a very, very large, large problem.

To learn how IBM is building the future of computing, visit IBM.com slash quantum. Hey, it's Ryan Seacrest for Albertsons and Safeway. Ready to save, it's time for cyber deals. Put a spring in your step with fresh savings that brighten the season. These exclusive week-long digital offers on your favorite products are only available when you shop online. Save on eligible items from Kettle, Chabani, Quaker, Skippy, Hidden Valley, International Delight, and Signature Select. Available now through March 24th on pickup or delivery orders only. Restrictions apply.

See website for full terms and conditions. Beginning of all story. Yeah. Carbon microwave, your question is, could you do this? Answers now. I can't do this Maybe you can do it Or maybe you aspire to do it

Tell you what So your an is shut Get back to me Yeah And then We'll follow up I'm excited to To hear the end results

Right Dead His mom writes the month later Yeah he died Yeah you guys killed my son Because you You read his stupid comment You killed my

58 year old son I'm 20 You killed my 58-year-old son. It's like, what? My 58-year-old, my 58-year-old child did this. I wonder if we have any, I don't know if we have any geriatric fans. I don't know. We must have at least one.

There's got to be, well, geriatric kind of, that's like what, like. 70s and shit. That's 70s. What's octogenarian, I guess, is 80. Yeah. Yeah, there must be at least one 70-year-old watching this. Not really understanding how to ask questions. Because they're just like, I don't know.

I don't get this newfangled fucking website shit. You know? Yeah. He has on his radio. Yeah. He has a sign of shortwave radio. He sends pigeons to Burbank generally in the vicinity, dropping questions for the show, just hoping that, like, maybe it'll, like, land in front of us.

Hell yeah. Yeah. I'm sure there's one guy. Carrier birds always a crazy idea to me. He's like, that's so fucking cool. You could get animal to do that. Yeah. It is nuts because I don't have the patience to ever train a bird to do that.

I don't. I don't know if I don't know if I, to a degree, but it's like, well, yeah, he just don't believe it. I think it's kind of a conspiracy. I don't know. Why don't you believe it? It's so simple, though. I've never seen a bird do it. So, like, I just don't believe it. You've never seen a bird stop at a feeding place? What? That's not what we're talking about. Well, that's how it works, though. What are you talking about? They make them stop at, like, feeding posts until they eventually get to the point where they're at, like, you know, like, hopefully they make it from point to point to point to get to where people are, like, are taking messages. I don't believe that. Every time I've walked up to a bird, it's flown away. You're telling me somebody goes up to a bird.

You're telling me somebody goes up to his leg and it's carrying a fucking scroll with like advanced coordinates on it. Those clearly birds that are socialized. And what if like there's a really secret message that gets like what if an eagle eats a fucking bird and then the leg falls and enemy territory? I'm sure it happened. I'm sure it must just get it except it all the time. It seems like a very unwis. Just get a guy to do it. Yeah.

Yeah. They had like helicopters. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, of course they did. I just don't think you can train a bird to do anything. I just have seen birds not every bird I've ever met is just not been smart enough to do anything.

That doesn't mean anything. It does. It means everything. You've never met someone that's a fucking like, I don't know, a fucking astronaut doesn't mean people can't be astronauts. I've met an astronaut. You have? Yeah, actually, I think. Damn.

Well, you've never met like, I don't know. Well, I don't know if he's been to space. I have met an assassin. I have met somebody who is technically an astronaut. You met a guy that claimed you as an astronaut. Yeah, it's a better bet. Maybe. You never met like a fucking assassin.

Assassin. People can be assassins. I've met an assassin. No, you haven't. You met a guy. You wouldn't know. He would have claimed to be an assassin. It was the same guy. He was not a Halloween party. He was like, whoa.

I'm an astronaut assassin. No, he gave me his business card. He said, it said, uh, redacted, redacted assassin. Oh. If you ever need to go to space and or have someone killed. Right. He's like, he's a part time assid part time ask for that. Fucking agent 47 type shit is like, I can do it all.

Whatever you need me to do, I can get it done for you. And he fucking walks off. He walks up. He walks and stands in a corner of the room. quietly motionless for three hours. Yeah, stairs in the corner, like in the Blair Witch. Does Agent 47 have generals? Yes.

They don't work, though, but they're like backwards. They're like in. Like his dick is genuinely inside his body. It's not like a vagina inverted. It's just a penis in his body. Right, right. I just feel like, you know, for no distractions. Yeah, I guess they turned them around.

Yeah, they couldn't get rid of it because it was too demoralizing. So they just, they backwardsed it. Yeah, gotcha. I feel like he doesn't have genitals I feel like his genitals are just not there You think he's a unit? Or they're like I feel like they're there But they don't work

So he's a unit Essentially Unix yeah I thought Unix had him removed But I think that's probably like Some fucking I mean that's offensively What's happening is it not

There's a nerd That's it In inert Yeah his balls are inert So why'd your wife beat you up See he beat me up Yeah it's crazy He's got like a

He's got a black lip Yeah And he's black But like I mean like He's got He's got a bruise on his lip. Yeah, he got a bruise on his lip because, you know, his lady. Yeah.

She's a little rough, man. And this dude, he needs help. He needs to be rescued. Yeah. Everybody called, everybody call, what is it, the domestic abuse help hotline. Yeah. Tell them Kingston needs help. Men's battered shelter.

Don't do that. Don't clog people's lines up. Yeah, people that really need it. And then there's my stupid eyes. They're just like, well, please hold. They're getting beat up while, like,

some guys are like, this is going to be so funny. I'm going to tell them, I'm going to do a podcast. I'm going to do a podcast inside joke. Just, just for me. And nobody else that I know will even understand it.

I'd be so disappointed if we had listeners that were that stupid. To actually call. Dary don't. Oh, to actually call. Like, like, oh,

um, call, uh, the, whatever. And then someone's like, oh, okay.

And I'm like, Right, they don't get that it's a bit. Like, how do you... I actually don't think we have anybody like that. No, no, I can't imagine. I would be surprised. People are really dumb. I think we have anybody.

I think we have people who would say they would do that, but like, I don't think they would do it. No, not that. I don't think, yeah, yeah, I don't think, like, somebody who's completely not aware that you, and think, oh, Kingston needs help. I got to actually rescue this giant man from his midget girlfriend. Like... That's crazy.

Like, it's me. So seriously, why did she hit you? Yeah. No, she hit me. I was, I went to a storyteller's cafe, which is pretty much like a little Disney cafe for my, for my nephew. Cope. It was his little birth, his little first birthday. His little first birthday?

Yeah. One hit more of a hit of the copium. It was really cute. I had a good time there. I bet you did. I'm really cute. I mean, at a child's first birthday? It sounds like a place that you would flourish.

Yeah, my godson. Yeah. It was very cute. I was like, aw. I took him there. He got terrified of the mascots because, you know, he's a baby. and they fucking terrify him. Yeah, he doesn't understand

that that's not real. Yeah, he's like, he's like, he's like, right. He's like looking at them, he's gonna look at it, but they get near him and he's fucking freaks out. He's like, I remember what it was like to kind of transition

out of that age. Like, I have, I have very, like, vague, but still kind of like, strong memories of seeing, like, mascots and shit and being like,

what the fuck creature is that? They always cool to me. What? They were always cool to me. There was always, they were cool to you? Yeah, there was like,

oh, this is like the thing I see on TV, button in person. I thought it was cool. I guess he's where you grew up, everybody was getting stabbed and shot. Yeah, so like a big-headed freak who's smiling all the time isn't really that scary. Yeah, it's like, so relief. Yeah. Yeah, it's like, at least this one is smiling, you know?

Yeah. Right, right. Usually it's a big-headed freak with a gun who's not smiling. He's crying, actually. He's screaming, God help us. God help us. As he shoots a guy and jumps out the window, lands on his head, it cracks like a fucking egg and everybody steps over. You step over him. I got to go. I got to get to work. I got to get to work, dude. I got to catch the for a

train. I can't fucking be here right now. I got to catch the Mr. Frosty before you get away. That's crazy. But yeah, it was cool. My nephew took a picture with one of them. He was at the age where he was scared of him. And he took a picture of one. He said, I was being brave.

Did you see? And I almost cried. Wait, did that? So that happened at the cafe? Mm-hmm. Do the mascot punched you? No. My nephew, like, because they're babies and they don't fucking understand space

awareness, he like fucking flailed up and fucking balked me in the back of my lip. And it actually opened. And I was like, awesome. So I had to go to the bathroom and clean it up. I was like, well, at least you're having fun. It's a nice cover-up. Yeah. It's a very clever alibi.

I would believe it. Yeah. Yeah. I would, yeah. I think our listeners totally believe it too. We'll listen. We'll listen, guys. They completely know that you have not been abused.

I don't know if I got abused. I feel like I would just leave. You would do this. I would just leave. You would do exactly what you're doing right now. Because I wouldn't want to hit her back because I'm like, that's fucked up. I'm going to look bad no matter what. Plus her dad is there and he has guns. Well, that's why you take the guns

And then be like, hey, guess what? I hit your daughter. What are you going to do? You'll point a gun at him. That's so terrible. That's so terrible. No, no, no, you know what you do? You take all the guns.

You buy a, what do you call those things? The smelting pots? You buy all, you take all of his guns. You put them in a smelter. Yeah. And you smelt them all into liquid. And then you build, you mold. You build one big gun.

No, no, no, not a gun. But you mold like a big, like a big, like, like gauntlet, a big, a fist, right? A metal fist made of all of her dad's guns. Oh, okay. And you cool it off, you put it on, and then you punch your girlfriend with it. Yeah, I like that. That's how you do it.

Yeah, dude. You do a nice gun punch. I like that. Yeah, yeah. With the power of all these guns, I hit you. And it makes a gun noise. Like, I want a fire. Kablam.

That's what it says. Cablam. That's sick as fuck. Did you see it? Hello, hello. I'm Malcolm. Gladwell, host of the podcast Smart Talks with IBM. I recently sat down with IBM's chairman and CEO, Arvin Krishna,

and I asked him, how can companies use AI to its fullest potential to create smarter business? My one advice to them, pick areas you can scale. Don't pick the shiny little toys on the side. For example. If anybody has more than 10% of what they had for customers, a service 10 years ago, they're already five years behind. If anybody is not using AI to make their developers who write software 30% more productive today, with the goal of being 70% more productive.

Yeah. Wow. So we are not asking our clients to be the first experiment on it. We say, you can leverage what we did. We're happy to bring out all our learnings, including what needs to change in the process, because the biggest change is not technology. is getting people to accept that there's a different way to do things. To listen to the full conversation, visit IBM.com slash smart talks.

Hey, it's Ryan Seacrest for Albertsons and Safeway. Ready to save, it's time for cyber deals. Put a spring in your step with fresh savings that brighten the season. These exclusive week-long digital offers on your favorite products are only available when you shop online. Save on eligible items from Kettle, Chobani, Quaker, Skippy, Hidden Valley, International Delight, Frito Lay, and Signatures Select. Available now through March 24th on pickup or delivery orders only.

Restrictions apply. See website for full terms and conditions. That fucking, like, former, yeah. I was watching Anderson Silva fights yesterday, some of his classics before he got, you know, old. Who's that? He's this guy that does figure skating. I genuinely, I actually, I'm not even exaggerating. That makes sense.

Yeah, he's one of the best MMA fighters of all time. Oh, okay. Yeah. So is he punch real good? something. He punches good, he kicks good. Amazing. Go that grapples. Punch good. Punch kick good. Big deal. Oh, the sound effects.

There's a former NHL player. Did you see that clip that went viral? I guess a long time ago. This guy, they were on the golf course and this dude was just yelling like a fucking chimp. Yeah, let's go. Like drunk as shit. On a golf course? Yeah. And then the former NHL player, huge guy just comes over, tosses him into the lake.

the drunk guy. He's so drunk, he just gets up like nothing happens. The NFL guy, NHL guy grabs him and he starts making sound effects for himself. He starts saying bang. He's literally bang, bang, bang, bang. This is a real video? Yeah. And I was like, how old is this? I think it's like, I think it might have happened this year or maybe last year, but I saw it again because Bill Burr's been doing these like on his Monday Morty podcast. Somebody's been making these clips for him. So it'll be like a little drawing of him.

And then he's like describing certain things. And I saw it. I'm like, I never like actually fully saw that. And the dude just straight up making his own sound effects. I've never seen that. But I love that. Sometimes you got to do it.

And H.HL people are, uh, they're out there. They're out there. People talk about MMA people. And I'm like, look, they're their own breed. But you're playing hockey and you're fighting people all the time. And it's like I like that they have taken that out of the like that's a staple of yes, not even against the rule. You know, you know why.

They grab each other. You know, hold on and you start wailing with. I think the reason why they allow them is because since they're on skates, they can't fucking actually. They can't generate the energy to really like. I've seen some of them get really fuck. But a lot of times. If you also try to pull one forward and try to like meet that perfect.

fucking like, I've seen, I make up for it. That's crazy. Yeah, I've seen some pretty bad ones. If it gets to the floor, like, that's thing. They try to, that's, they're supposed to never get to the floor. If someone falls down, it is done. But I've seen it, obviously, people take too fucking long because people are stupid. They want violence.

I think the reason they do it is because it's on ice, so it's technically the safest place to get hurt. So if somebody falls down, they're already like, kind of like, you're already like 50% heel. You could be fucking, yeah, are you icing yourself immediately? Yeah, you're immediately resolving the issue. I suppose you're all, you also have to contend. with razor sharp skates flailing around everywhere

but like I mean I've never I've never really seen anybody get injured from the skates and there's a I've seen there is a notorious clip that I'm sure you've seen I've seen a really bad clip of a guy's hand right no no dude's throat gets fucking slit open there's blood everywhere I've never I've I can't believe

he hasn't seen that I can't believe he doesn't have that fucking playing on repeat on his morning alarm he wakes up gets his coffee that's one of those upsetting videos it's one of those upsetting videos I've ever seen yeah damn dude it's great He was completely fine. That's insane.

It looks like it's crazy when... He died, I'm pretty sure. No, he didn't. He didn't die from that? No. Oh, well, fucking nothing's real. Who cares? It's crazy when people get their throat slit sometimes.

Well, you don't goose out blood. And they're like... And then like, sometimes it's like, you know, it's just like you hit the certain artery. If you had an artery, yeah, but if it gets slit, you're bleeding, yeah. You can still be okay, which is crazy. It just depends on how deep and how... Yeah, of course. The whole circumstantial.

But you just think immediately, when you think about it, you're done. Because we see movies and stuff, that's why it's not. A guy with a slit throat might as well have his head exploded. You know what I mean to me? Yeah. It's just like, oh, you're gone. That's what it feels like.

It's the same way how we like, we see people get like kicked in things. You're like, oh, that guy took a kicked head. It's like, no, you get kicked in the head. You're likely fucking swimming. You don't know where you're at. You're like, oh, shit. Well, listen. Let me verify that guy because I'm pretty sure he's a lie, but, you know.

I mean, you could, I just want to verify it because you got me thinking. I'm going based on what I assumed to be true about that kind of injury, but you could be totally right. So because there's nothing to talk about really, oh, there will be soon, but like we're just simply recording too late to know what this address is. We're going to go on for, we're going to go into some questions here from our patrons over at patreon.com slash a Star Tank. Remember, you can go over there. And if you don't go over there, bad things will befall you. I will make sure of it. You don't even have to stop me.

I'm so serious when I say that Did you find out the truth? Well, so the problem is so I don't know which What like? There's more than one. I don't have time. It's happened multiple times. I don't know which one it is because multiple people have survived.

One person has died. So I don't know. I see that specific clip that were referred to. I don't know if he survived or died. Okay. Yeah. I thought he survived. I don't know.

I don't care. I hope he died. I hope he died. That's crazy. That's crazy. That's crazy. The hockey player just comes in to slitch your throw right now. He just glides through.

I hope I die. I'm just a kick. An up kick? An up kick? I guess that's what you would call that. It's an upper kick. Yeah, an upper kick. I don't know.

I guess it's called an upper cut. It just be an upper punch. Yeah, but you're cutting. It sounds cool. It does sound way cool. Aren't downer cuts real too? No. Because you can't really.

I feel like for some reason, for some reason, The reason cutting down doesn't make sense. I think it makes more sense, but yeah, I know what you mean. Like, because because the point of an uppercut is that it cuts, it cuts through a guard. Yeah, I come up with like, you're not, ah.

I guess, yeah. Two fighting, that makes perfect sense. Like, yeah. Overhead. That is so, to punch somebody like this is insane. I guess it's like the closest is doing like an overhand if you're, like a hammerbacker. kind of do that weird like kind of circular motion which uh it's it's it's such an interesting

punch because you have your timing has to be perfect because you at a certain point you're not even you can't see the opponent anymore because when you're throwing it over you're now looking this way so you're you're you have to be perfect yeah it's like one of the first things they teach you not to do in your boxing it's fucking it's it's it is a it's when it works that it works that but it's so uses in boxing too because of the fact that like if you do that it's made it back and ahead and you're like you're like you're you fucking you're you lose the fight. Well,

you wouldn't hit somebody in the back of the head necessarily. I think you can. I think it's the problem with it because if they come, if they come into you that would have to be,

that would have to be an error. If they're like going to hit, you know, they're like trying to slip a punch or go into you and throw that shit overhead. The best case is you hit them in the back of the head

because you're like, oh, I need to hit him in the back of the head because you, oh, you're throwing a hit over the top of someone while they're coming into your hit. Oh my God.

So you can potentially hit them like here. Oh my God. You can have him on the top of the head, maybe. And that sucks. The top is the strongest part of your head. Well, that would possibly break your head. Of course. Of course.

If let us say it means nothing to be. So, Gap, they call him slipping Jimmy rode in. Yeah, okay. He says, yo, so I didn't see this. I don't know if you guys, this sounds like something that you might have seen. But this is completely new to be. Get ready to look this up if this is true or not. Yo, did you all see the gooner at the corn concert slapping me?

Oh, fuck. I can't believe I didn't bring this up. I can't believe I didn't bring this up. I don't know anything of it. This is real? Oh shit. Wait, sorry. Oh, my God, it's that episode.

Mary Jane! We've had, uh, most recently we've had some episodes of TV and, like, movies playing in the background of our show. Yeah. It's the Spider-Man animated series scene where it's so good. Mary Jane is made of water and she's fading away. Yeah, she fades away into oblivion. This is fucked up, like beyond, in ways that it's insane. This actually, like, genuinely made me sad when I was a kid.

crying and shit. Well, to me, that's such a good delivery. Yeah, it's great. It's insane. It's a good delivery, but that's like not what the fuck

Spider-Man is supposed to sound like at all. But, like, I love you. I don't know what the fuck that even means. That's a dumb thing to say. Because he's supposed to be like, he's never supposed to be in pain, I guess.

He's supposed to be like a 19-year-old here. That's why. And that's a grown-ass nigger. That's been the whole thing. Dude, you know. That's so crazy. You know,

you know, Alice and Chain Singer. Do you know that guy? Alice? I know. His name is Allison Chain. I know the group. I know the group. But I'm just saying like he has a very like a mature voice.

Let's just even take that that fucker that sang for, oh my God. Greta Van Fleet. You know, there was a house in New Orleans. Oh, I think I was like fucking like that. He was like, yeah. You're just raping his story right now, literally. Yeah, yeah. The House of the Rising Sun by the, not the, not the monkeys.

The crew cuts. The queer? Yeah, the guerrillas. The guerrillas? The guerrillas? The guerrillas? Yeah, the guerrillas. There once was a house in a new...

Hello, hello. I'm Malcolm Gladwell, host of Smart Talks with IBM. I recently spoke with IBM's new director of research, Jake Gambata. We discussed his vision for the future of quantum computing. At IBM research, what we always do is answer what is the future of computing, whether it's coming up with new algorithms, coming up with better AI, coming up with quantum, or coming up with just how do different accelerators go together. It's our DNA to answer the question of what is the future.

Isn't it a perfect problem for IBM because you kind of need to have a legacy of building stuff? Yes. Building actual physical machines. Yeah, it's why I came to IBM. I wanted the experience, the culture of building, hard things that others have not done before. Where do you imagine we are in the timeline of this technology? There will come a point when it will mature.

My cell phone is a mature technology at this point. How far are we from that point with Conton? By 2029, we'll build the first fault-tolerant quantum computer. That is one that can run a very, very large, large problem. To learn how IBM is building the future of computing, visit IBM.com slash quantum. Hey, it's Ryan Seacrest for Albertsons and Safeway.

It's stock up savings time now through March 31st. Spring in for store-wide deals and earn four times of points. Look for in-store tags to earn on eligible items from Celsius, Body Armor, Oiraida, Silk, Capri-San, Bavarian Meets, and Charmin. Then clip the offer in the app for automatic event-long savings. Stack up those rewards to save even more. Enjoy savings on top of savings when you shop in-store or online for easy. Drive up and go pick up or delivery.

Restrictions apply. See website for full terms and conditions. But so listen, this guy's masturbating at the corn concert. What's going on with this? Oh, so this is, so when I first saw this, the only thing that made me feel like this is real is there was people onto the right of him that were like all crowded. Like they, the people, I guess there was people that were actually sitting by him

and then they moved away because you didn't actually. see you only saw from the back and like you just see him like going crazy. I see. And I'm like this I'm like this has to be a bit right but I'm seeing people over on the side looking all kind of terrified and like what the fuck. And then let me

let me get there. A guy comes up and does one of those you know doesn't know how to fight type of hits where it's like super wide and quack. Dude's a beanie or whatever flies off and he's a little stun locked for a second. It's so

funny and then it cuts to jerking off and then getting punched the thing that's crazy though then it just cuts to and maybe uh there's probably other footage since uh since i saw that or initial one it just cuts to him being uh taken out by the security like him being fucking and kind of up at least uh yeah you don't see it you can't see his dick or nothing so the thing is if that dude was legitimately jacking off which it seems like it was and so people's reactions And I think it was pretty sure that guy was gone. You know what I mean? Like it wasn't one of those like, yeah.

Yeah, it wasn't one of those like I'm literally jacking off to corn because corn's hot, which I would prefer it to be that. Like it's like this guy's just some freak and he really loves corn. But like I was like, oh, this is less funny because it's still funny, but it felt a little less funny because it's like the guy that he's like slapped, the thunder slap. It's like that. He slapped when he's back to normally like what's going on. It feels like that.

It feels like he was out of his mind and then he got hit into reality. He was like, why is my dick out? Who did this? Why is he jerking off at a corn show, man? That's the thing. Like, something triggered him. Probably, I would love to know more. There's probably more on this.

He got to do it. Yeah, twist. You start twisting his dick. I feel like it's the least masturbatable music that there is. It's, I mean, they're telling you to twist. Like the bass, you know, is so loose and like it kind of sounds like jacking off. You ever he'll feel the like the bass, like the bass, like the bass, like a little slappy. He wears this like metal thing that I think like he broke his thumb at some point.

His thumb fell off. Oh, that's what it is. So he got a metal arm. He replaced it with a metallic thumb. And then he was like, oh, this sounds way cooler. But it sounds kind of like a like a loosed weener, you know, when you're like slapping it. Like it's like, bam, bam, bam. Exactly what a loose

So then like that dude heard that He heard the bass He was like damn This actually kind of getting me hot It actually actually is a matter of fact There's footage and they heard him saying As a matter of fact There's footage

I forgot to mention I forgot to lead with There's footage of him saying I can't stand this This base is making me so hot I'm going to jack off right now Actually there's footage A matter of fact

Yeah You're trying to make me believe it's so hard. It happened. And then the people were like, sir, I prefer you to not jack off. And he was like, hey, I'm already too hot. I got to go. I'm already jacking off. He's like, you know, you ever heard the phrase when you got to go, you got to go? And then that guy comes behind him and fucking had a hammered. It was a really hard. And he was like, where am I? It was the music. It was like the Piper. But it was the penis Piper. It was corners. I thought it was in my bed. And it was 1130 at night going to jack off, not clean it up and go to sleep.

not clean it off. It's crazy. That's a... Come in your hand and fall. I've never done that. I thank God I've never gotten to that point where I've come in my hand. There are many times that I didn't jack out because I didn't want to clean up.

You know what I'm saying? Exactly. I'm like, I don't want to get... I'm too cold. So I'm too cold. So I'm just going to sleep. Well, so listen,

on this subject, the gooner spider rode in. Nice. The goon or spiders. Says, what's up guys? Has there ever been a celebrity or historical figure that you looked up to but later found out was a horrible person?

I mean, we know Keynesons. There's so many. Kanye, brother. And I found out, oh, yeah, I guess. Kanye, though, would be the obvious one. I was thinking historians first. I was like, is there a story? Oh, historian?

Like a historical figure, you mean? Yeah. Not a historian. I don't know, actually. What am I looked up to it? I don't know if I've looked up to people so distinctly that I would be like, that I would have. I don't think I've put anybody on a pedestal necessarily for them to do anything for me to be like, oh, oh, no.

You know what I mean? Yeah. Well, what do you mean? Sorry, just I was thinking of a parody like, jacking off in concert seats. Dixon. I was just trying to think. What song is that? Freak on a leash.

Oh, right, right. I just zoned down. And then him just going crazy at the fucking ad lib, what is called the scat part? Right. I'm sure that's when it was. Anyway, I'm still, I need to move forward. There's like Masamusa. What the fuck is that?

Is it the line kick? Massimusa? Yeah. The historical figure? Yeah. I looked up to him for a while. And I found out he was black and I was like, yeah, well. He was the richest man in the world at one point.

Yeah. Oh, right, right, right, yeah. And then it was, um. What is he talking? And then I found out he was black. There was Hemingway. I was like Okay

He's just listening He's just listening He's just listing people Ernest Hemingway You know You have great What is There's no knowledge

That is not power And then you learn That was Erndus Hemingway Was a white person And I noticed I noticed he shaked A black person's hand

Once and I was like Oh Oh you're still on the same Okay I get The line of thinking I understand And uh

Actually no There's no one I really There's no one I really Like Maybe there's Artists I looked up to But like none of them were like It wasn't it wasn't

It wasn't Yeh? None of them like Yay I think Ye was the person looked up to the most. Is that the only one you would say then? It's a hell of a fall. It's pretty crazy. It's monumental.

It's unbelievable. It's actually, it's kind of technically still unbelievable for me. They're like, what the fuck happened? It's so funny. I think it's very believable, but it's just like, it's so sad. It was very believable to me. Just because, like, I remember feeling like, yeah, of course this guy is going to. I remember early being like, this guy sucks.

At what point? Since the Katrina thing. It's like this guy's already on little untethered to say some stuff like I get it. It's like I get it. Like I respect that he said that. When he was upset about like being real about. I know I think like I think I clearly wanted being real that that's kind of thing. No, I think I think he.

Oh, you think that like. I think he likes to drum up controversy. I think he's a complete. I think he's a complete fake person with no actual. Even backed in. Yeah, I think so. I think that I think he understands that that works. I just agree and does it.

I also think he's insane to be fair. I don't think I think he was completely coherent back then. I didn't see anything wrong. I didn't see anything wrong with that because, like, dude, FEMA was a thing because of that fucking disaster. Yeah. Like, I, and, and, and, historically, yeah, the government doesn't give a shit about poor and black fucking communities. No, yeah, but it's like, it's like a guy who's like, he's like missing, he's missing all his legs. He's like a torso rolling around at the outside of a 7-11.

He's on a crack. And he's like, you know, the Trump administration's corrupt. And it's like, yeah, I bet. but like That's what you're comparing I can't eat you? I think I think back then

I think I think more than one thing could be possible You're Northrodomis then If you if you clocked him that early I am No I think more than one thing I was just very early on the hatred

for him I just like I really couldn't stand him Yeah For a long But maybe not as early as Katrina I didn't really know who he was back then But I think around the

The VMA thing Okay When he was like when he was like Beyonce had the best music video I was like brother no she didn't I understand You're crazy I understand

That is a dumb opinion to have if you're in the industry like what are you saying i've seen a lot of people actually agree with that and i was a little i think it was a good i think i think i don't think taylor should have won that award but at the same time it's like no it's not even the close it's not even in the top probably like 500 music videos fine um it's just for me personally it's it it's the music i i i fucking don't like well the thing is that the thing is that the thing is that taylor taylor got it for the album i'm i mistaken right uh uh i and then i think don't con you was like i think that album was like i think that album was a good album, but don't get me

wrong, I just don't think Taylor was sort of won that album. I thought it for a video, and that's why he went out. I thought, I thought Taylor won it for the album, but I think that's, he was referring to the fact that Taylor got it for this album, but Beyonce had a song that was so much better than anything you had on that album. It's the VMA's a music award, so they were definitely... But they still do albums though. They don't just do music videos. Well, they know, well, the

Grammys do that. I think the most... I think they all do that. I think the biggest award is the the best video, right? I think they all, I can be wrong. Whatever. It's irrelevant. Hello, hello. I'm Malcolm Gladwell, host of

Smart Talks with IBM. I recently spoke with IBM's new director of research, Jake Mbata. We discussed his vision for the future of quantum computing. At IBM research, what we always do is answer what is the future of computing. Whether it's

coming up with new algorithms, coming up with better AI, coming up with quantum or coming up with just how do different accelerators go together. It's our DNA to answer the question of what is the future. Isn't it a perfect problem for IBM because you kind of need to have a legacy of building stuff? Yes. Building actual physical machines. Yeah, it's why I came to IBM.

I wanted the experience, the culture of building hard things that others have not done before. Where do you imagine we are in the timeline of this technology? There will come a point when it will mature. Right? Yeah. My cell phone is a mature technology at this point. How far are we from that point with Quantum? By 2029, we'll build the first fault-tolerant quantum computer.

That is one that can run a very, very large, large problem. To learn how IBM is building the future of computing, visit IBM.com slash quantum. Hey, it's Ryan Seacrest for Albertsons and Safeway. It's stock up savings time now through March 31st. Spring in for store-wide deals and earn four times of points. Look for in-store tags to earn on eligible items from Celsius, Body Armor, ORAIDA, Silk, Capri-Sun, Bavarian Meets, and Charmin. Then clip the offer in the app for automatic event-long savings.

Stack up those rewards to save even more. Enjoy savings on top of savings when you shop in-store or online for easy drive-up and go pick up or delivery. Restrictions apply. See website for full terms and conditions. She was clearly referring to her being the vest. I don't know what she came out with Taylor Swift at that point. Was it to shake it off or something?

I don't know. No, I think that might have been. It wasn't like 09. Shake it off was later. Yeah. When I was graduating high school, yeah. That was like in her country era. I don't know.

It doesn't really matter. I don't know. I'm so. The point is though, it's like that's not even, it's not even in the conversation for like best music videos of all time. It's insane to suggest that is crazy. I've seen some people say, that's the thing that where I'm like, I've seen some people break it down. I think it's a good video.

I've seen some people break it down. There are weird Al videos that are better than that. I guess it's a great idea. I guess based on like what's your criteria of like a good music video. Like say I think that the video would be good of this. I just personally don't, I don't, if I like the song, I feel like I'd probably appreciate the video way more. But I really don't like that song.

It just doesn't do anything for me. I like it. I like it sounds like you know how I say like something sounds like a jingle? That entire song's like the jingle to me. It sounds like. That's clearly pop music, like, and it's most, like, a true form. No, like, a lot of times, absolutely not. Like, you think about Michael Jackson.

Like, it's meant to be. Michael Jackson, Michael Jackson's era pop is the same thing. I'll rack off any, no, they don't sound like jingles, brother. I understand, I understand what you mean. Like, I, it's that period of time's pop music. I know what you mean that, like, Michael Jackson's pop music. In, oh, you're saying, you're saying in the 2010s or like, yeah, within that sphere of pop music time.

I don't. Because it's like, pop music is like what Michael Jackson made also, what Justin Bieber made. And it's like, those are. the same kinds of music technically. You might be so, so the, what's his name? Justin Bieber's baby is kind of similar in a way, but it has more of a melody than honestly. Because I don't see the ladies is just like,

da-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-and- then it goes, like that era of time's music. Like that era of times music. You know what it is? It sounds like a ringtone. Yes. Yeah. It's like a jingle effectively.

It's not, yeah, exactly. That's what I said. But yeah, if it, like say, Halo is a, is a song. Yeah, I agree. You know what I'm saying? Even though like, of course. We don't like it. I think it's a pretty sure song.

It's not the point. It's not the point. I'm just saying it's ruined my Google searches forever, dude. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's very true. I was having that problem. There was a band called Demon Hunter that just came out with some new songs. And now you're getting to K-pop.

And I'm getting that shit. I'm like, what the fuck is this? I didn't even know this was a thing until recently. I know. And then we heard it in that fucking bar. Oh, that's right. Yeah. Because I was like, what the hell is this?

this and uh jojo was telling me it's that demon thing or somebody was telling me k pop is one of the few music that does literally nothing for me like that music is like it's it's almost empty sound to me it's like oh this is just nothing i haven't heard i haven't heard um i guess i guess i haven't looked out for me because i've heard some good jpop back in the day but i haven't heard any it's just i haven't found it i guess because i've heard some of that bts yes stuff but again commercial shit and playing right literally i think it was t mobile and it's like dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun did i was like this is this is a fucking commercial i'm like who the fuck wants to sit down and listen to this i don't understand there's some of it that's

good like i don't know um i don't know if i had know it any by name though i've heard i've heard it and i've been like that's good that's a good melody or whatever yeah i just don't care first of all i know i'm not going to be able to spell this so i just don't care to look it up maybe have english names most of the time you know it'd be like it's like the asian Asian whatever, like letters, and then it's like English word, like something you never understand, sunset. Flash sunset. And it's like, oh, okay, sick. Yeah.

You can find this song, I guess. I've heard some pretty decent Korean hip hop. I have never. I've heard, I know, I know good Korean rappers, though. I know a few good Korean rappers, but I don't. But they, they, they're not rapping. They're rapping in English. Oh, I see what you're saying.

But they're Koreans. Some of them, well, some of the ones that, they're not from. They do a hybrid. Like they'll mostly rap in English, but then they'll throw in some of their Korean shit. Yeah, yeah. Or sometimes the other way around. The ones, I know, I know American rappers who are Korean that are pretty good. I know a few of them.

I've heard one guy. There's one guy that I bet you would think is pretty good. You would at least think he's talented. But his name? I think it's sick K. Sikki? Yeah, something like that. That guy's pretty sick.

My favorite is dumbfounded. That was my boy, bro. Everyone has new job is collabs back in the day, man. That was my shit. I randomly had him, uh, he, he he he no no he he he randomly comment on one of my videos don't found it yeah he randomly

I was it was a video where I was making fun of do you remember when Lily Singh did that comedy show or that late night thing oh yeah so I was just like poking fun at it because it was bad obviously and he somehow made it to the video I was like what the fuck is he doing here so I guess he probably has beef with her or something I don't know I found it I love that guy he made so much bumpers

for me back in the day shout out Shout out to the Asian community, man. Shout out to the Asian community, man. Yeah. I always, I know I've seen the praises of that freestyle that they did. It was a commercial. It was like a beat.

That's crazy. You're like, eh. But there's that, I'm sure you saw that was a commercial. It was like this, um, E-U-N-G. Yeah. And then it was like, oh, and had this sick-ass fucking beat. And it was like a beats commercial or something. Might not have been beats, but it was something.

And then they released a video. It was pretty dope. It was like a pretty cool collab. It was the, it was the Japanese, It was the Japanese, all Korean, but one of them was Japanese in Korean. I forgot, I know the song. I don't know if there's any Japanese.

I think it's called Naida low. Wait, I just told you the name of the song called E-U-N-G. Ung. I feel like, this is funny. I feel like I heard it, but I can be wrong. This is funny. Sweene's Life-Sized Chocolate, uh,

Sween's Life-Sized Chocolate Lily wrote and he says, hey, my favorite white supremacist, I have a question for you. I have a question for you. The other day I was playing an episode while I was cleaning. Usually my girlfriend is fine with me having an episode on. you should never have an episode like you should never have our show on around women what I I feel like we're not that bad okay hard disagree hard agree for me with my own statement hard agree

usually my girlfriend is fine with having an episode out but she looked to be disgusted because of some lively joke which I don't remember what that could be it could be a million things though I guess what jokes or or things you find funny have other people found disgusting or morally reprehensible I feel like something happened to me recently oh I was that a Is that a party for a friend of ours? I'm not going to say the name because they might listen. But I was at a friend's party. And we were talking about Halloween Town or something.

Yeah. And Halloween Town was on the TV. And I said, oh, man, you know, it's crazy. It's like, I think all these kids are dead. And then, like, some people laughed, but then I saw somebody who was like, what? What do you mean? It's horrible.

And it just like immediately like deflated the humor of the situation. I would have made it. But like there's always, yeah, there's some people who are just not clued into that kind of thing. Yeah. It's not really funny either, to be fair. Or there's some people that are also like better people. Their morals are a little bit like higher in a way that like one of our buddies actually, uh, um, shout out. Shout out, Ben.

It's so funny because, like, we're waiting for Nikki to show up. Me and Jordan and I think it was Tyler or something. We were all like, oh, we should, Zeig Hal, Nicky Ziggie, right? When she comes in. And then Ben was like, I can't be here. Like, he was like immediately, he's like, I need to leave now. Because he just didn't want to be anywhere near. And I'm like, that's fair.

That's absolutely fair. People like that should lead, you know. People like us. need to be around to like I'll be the hype man to like be like I agree with that guy I'm gonna do fuck shit though I don't want to lead I just want to be

I'll hype you up I will be I'll be your supporter I'll platform a good person This is a good man Vote for this motherfucker you know Yeah Vote for Jared Fogel Oh my God Like for me like for me I don't know

I That nigga's gonna be out in like 2028 or something Yeah you're gonna be out soon That made me so angry you said. It's weird. I got like fiery for a second. Yeah, good behavior. Just hearing those two, hearing Jared Fogel good behavior there and

like just made me mad. That's crazy. Oh my God. It's weird because I feel like I feel like most of my friends don't give a fuck about what? I don't know like the shit I say. Oh, sure. I mean that's why they're your friend. Like even like even at the bar I said some like some pretty wild.

You said some pretty crazy joke. Yeah, you wouldn't stop. Consistently. It was annoying. And I was getting last of the whole table. I was like, this is crazy because even I'd be like, yeah. It's crazy to say, especially around like, the new people. Did you meet that? Did you know that guy with the Darkstalkers shirt?

I think I met him maybe once before. To me, whenever I meet someone first, I'm like, we got to fill this out. I gauge. I do a gauge. I'm like, oh. Oh, and you, you found. How funny is it to you? That's crazy.

And it's like, hi, I'm Kingston. How funny is the end of me? It's a horrible. That's, this is crazy. That needs to be a part of your life. Is insane. How. funny. That's so crazy. You don't get to dictate that though. But it's like, I never said

them. He's like, yeah, decently funny. He's like, all right, come here. Come here. I got to. Hello, hello. I'm Malcolm Gladwell, host of the podcast Smart Talks with IBM. I recently sat down with IBM's chairman and CEO, Arvin Krishna. And I asked him, how can companies use AI to its fullest potential to create smarter business? My one advice to that, pick areas you can scale. Don't pick the shiny little toys on the side. For example. If anybody has more than 10% of what they had for customer service 10 years ago, they're already five years behind.

If anybody is not using AI to make their developers who write software 30% more productive today, with the goal of being 70% more productive. Yeah. Wow. So we are not asking our clients to be. be the first experiment on it. We say, you can leverage what we did. We're happy to bring out all our learnings, including what needs to change in the process, because the biggest change is not technology, is getting people to accept that there's a different way to do things.

To listen to the full conversation, visit IBM.com slash smart talks. Hey, it's Ryan Seacrest for Albertsons and Safeway. Ready to save, it's time for cyber deals. Put a spring in your step with fresh savings that brighten the season. These exclusive week-long digital offers on your favorite products are only available when you shop online. Save on eligible items from Kettle, Chabani, Quaker, Skippy, Hidden Valley, International Delight, Frito Lay, and Signature Select. Available now through March 24th on pickup or delivery orders only. Restrictions apply. See website for full terms and conditions.

A joke for you. So, yeah, imagine, we're not going to do this. I told that joke to Lily and she was like, this is the, literal worst joke ever heard in my life. But she laughed. And I was like, there you go. Yeah. It bothers you so much you laugh. And that's all I want.

It is interesting to have the dynamic. We did talk about trying to get Kingston on stage to do stand up at the laugh factory, or like anywhere, I guess. Oh, right. And then in the middle of his set when nobody laughs because inevitably nobody will. But like, at a point in like extreme silence, you need to word for word. Copy what you call?

Copy. Cramer. Like memorize that script I think the idea of going up there And doing that as a bit is crazy Because nobody would have strung you up and just Doing that Like just doing that has like

Like you go up there and you're like Verbatim doing it And then no one even accost you Then you start responding to you That would break the internet That would be like a great moment on the internet It'd be like oh that's mad funny But also like

Especially if you nail it like the mannerism too Because that motherfucker was like Really bad He was really upset Yeah We'd string you up or something and put pitchforks up your ass or something and I'm like, whoa.

Yeah. I was like, what? I just wonder what did you grow up? Does he know? I was like, is he what a Jewish guy from like the East Coast? What the fuck? He wasn't around with pit.

Like, oh yeah, I grew up around people who like, yeah, man, they'd stick you on a trident. Like this is a Romanian? Like what the fuck is the hell are you talking about? Complete lie.

Back in the day, Vlad would have taken care of you on Pike. Exactly. It's like, what are you doing here? He's a vampire. He's a vampire. Back with the, He would have fucking died you.

Draught in order. Went into his fucking house. Exposed. Oh, God, he flies away. He flies away. Do you just find out? At that point, I guess, do you, are you mad at him for being a racist? No, I guess not.

You're like, yes. He's just a old vampire. I'm more mad if you're a vampire. You also can kill me. No, I can't be mad at the racist vampire. I'd be more mad. Because they've been around longer. It's like, how do you care that?

Like, you've been here longer. But when did they become a vampire, right? No, if he became a vampire, right? No, if he became a vampire. vampire 25 minutes ago. It's like, well, I get it. You know? That's so insane.

Isn't it the opposite? Since you get it, if he was like, oh, he was from this time where everyone was scared of everything. But I think of it like this, right? If you're a vampire, you just live longer, so you kind of see more. You start understanding. Like, this is just less. This means less.

Is that how humans used to behave? I think that kind of is. I think it kind of is. Things matter less is the thing. Exactly. Because you've been alive for so long that like. But that food. I think that fact is back to my point.

No, but I understand what you're trying to say. I'm saying he's going to feel that way and then time is going to speed. He'll have been alive for so long that a day feels like 10 seconds. Yeah, for sure. And so he's not going to, he's not going to introspect about like, he's going to be like, get the fuck out of it. I don't care about these people. I feel like that's all you do when you're alive is you just interrespect of entry. That's all that matters.

He's like, I don't fucking did everything else. Why not think about shit for a little while, you know? Yeah. I'll stay in my fucking, my castle for a week and read books. I think a vampire wouldn't consider the feelings of people enough to examine the idea that they were prejudiced. It's kind of how I feel about it. I think that would happen. I think it's like ebbs and flows, right?

Like, these are animals. Like, do you care about like the things that you eat? Because at first you wouldn't care, I think. I think at first you wouldn't care. Because you'd be like, oh, this is just food. But then eventually it's just food. But it can also like talk and create stuff. And that's kind of miraculous.

Yeah, but I'm still going to eat it. Like, it doesn't. I mean, that's true. But I think it's a process. Because it's like we don't care about fucking We don't care about like pigs and cows The way we care about dogs and cats You know

Because they can convey emotion to us In a different way And I think humans can Clearly do that more than Those animals can So eventually it's like Oh, I was a human once And like humans can create things

So maybe as to like I think it's like a process Like I think eventually they get It's like Dracula and everything How big do you think that Kingpin's penises Probably fucking weird looking What if his penis is proportionate to his size that where it's like it's really big and also wildly fat like it's like a broad penis

extremely wide and girthy but it's short there's no it might be long too it just it just looks like long I think it's really long and thin I think it looks like a slim gym I thought what it's something to draw that I think I think his penis looks like the kingpin naked with a really thin long penis it was like a mosquito's face I like you know you know you know you know of the montanelli apple juices? What? You know the montanelli abduces? Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. It looks like apples actually.

You think that's what his penis was like? I imagine that, but it's the lengths of like that. So it's like it's a really rotund, decently linked penis. It's useless. Like you can't have sex with that guy. Who's going to want that? Yeah, yeah. You have to put it in soft. Yeah.

And it will hurt the woman. She will eject it out. He'll like, hey, get this out of me. Get this out of it. That's why he's so angry. His fleshlights look hilarious after he's done. with them. They look

ridiculous. I'm curious about this one. CJ being modded into MGS3 remake not even 12 hours after release. Of course.

Yeah. I'm playing that right now. Ooh, I saw a comparison video. It got me excited to play it. It's good. A lot of people were talking about

like performance stuff with it, but like I see it. Yeah. But it's not, I don't know, man. It's not Doom, you know?

Like I don't need it to. You play it on console? Yeah, I'm playing it on PS5. PS5. but like I just don't I don't need games like that to be to have the most frames like it would be nice it's insane that it can't it's insane to me that like Metal Gear Solid 3 remake a game from the PS2 can't run it like perfect 4k is it a remake or a rematch it's like a remake right like shit up well it's a very very very faithful very very very very faithful remake yeah I looked at the direct comparisons like a 25 minute video and I was I was really impressed with like everything and I'm not even a huge

middle gear three fan actually because I was kind of I played it so much later yeah so I wasn't like when it came out like my friend was obsessed with metal gear solid so we played it I heard everything about it from him so I was like I get it you know yeah right yeah I get it it it's good that's my favorite but also I played that game like I don't need to play this game that was your favorite one yeah three's my favorite nice he's my favorite I mean it's probably the technically the best out of the that's the fan favorite yeah three is really cool I like I like I I like parts of two a lot, but I don't, I just, I can't stand the main character of two, but I do like it.

Yeah, yeah, everybody hates writing. I get it. It's crazy. All people don't hate writing. My homies, grown up, did not hate writing at all. I didn't hate writing at all. I really can't stand that again. But I think, I think he's so cool and for, though.

I think anybody who hates riding is weak-willed. That's interesting. That's interesting. I think he's just kind of annoying. But, like, it's not a big deal. It's like, he's just kind of annoyed. And he's also another character that I like a lot that isn't annoying. And it's like, come on, dude.

But I get it. his life sucks dick so like it makes sense he's cool as fucking four though I just love the I just love the oil rig there's something about it it's a good design like when you're on it

just like I loved it but uh how many years is it gonna be to the first one because not they're gonna do two right they're gonna go chronological order I guess yeah but if they went in chronological order wouldn't it be all three one

two three one but like it'd be three how many needs it's so bad how many years is that gonna be man it'd be three one metal gear. They're not going to do that. Making Metal Gear would be ridiculous.

That'd be cool. I think that'd be cool. You would. Like modernizing that kind of game, I think that'd be really interesting. But it'd be such a wild idea to do. They might do that 10 years from now when they run out of ideas. Konami's like, what the fuck else do we do? What do we do?

I don't know. More Metal Gear again. Yeah. Another zombie you want game? Some big Metal Gear's out of 2.2. 2.2. I actually would love for them to a release. Twin snakes for fucking everything.

That would be nice. I'd love to have that. That'd be cool. I do just want a redo of one proper. That's going to be. That's going to be a big deal when that comes out. Yeah, that's, fuck. If they do it.

I'll cry if they don't. I swear. I will actually. I couldn't imagine playing that game again. I will go to the studios and cry. I played that game because I was a kid and I was willing to learn more. Like my brain wasn't set in stone yet. I can play anything.

It is what it is. No, but you're like, no, I can't do this. The reason I can't play that game, though, is it just it runs so fucking horribly. Like, every version of it that you can play now is just the PS1 version, and it's just like, it is bad, man. It is rough. Some of those fights are going to be interesting since it's not going to be like a top-down thing. If they, you know, they do a re-man. Like, somebody like, it's going to be weird.

You can't play this new one in top-down, if you want. That's weird. It was like, say, the Revolver-Ocelot fight out. actually, that's going to be weird. Fighting, a sniper wolf's going to be weird. The final fight's going to be ridiculous. Raven's going to be weird. There's going to be a couple of weird.

Second Vets is going to be weird because you're going to have to like unplug your keyboard. Are you still going to have to do that? It's not going to be the same. They're going to have to change that. Yeah, I really, that's interesting. Hello, hello. I'm Malcolm Gladwell, host of the podcast Smart Talks with IBM. I recently sat down with IBM's chairman and CEO, Arvin Krishna.

And I asked him, how can companies use AI to its fullest potential to create smarter business. My one advice to them, pick areas you can scale. Don't pick the shiny little toys on the side. For example, if anybody has more than 10% of what they had for customer service 10 years ago, they're already five years behind it. If anybody is not using AI to make their developers who write software, 30% more productive today,

with the goal of being 70% more productive. Yeah. Wow. So we are not asking our clients to be the first experiment on it. We say, you can leverage what we did. We're happy to bring out all our learnings, including what needs to change in the process, because the biggest change is not technology,

is getting people to accept that there's a different way to do things. To listen to the full conversation, visit IBM.com slash smart talks. Hey, it's Ryan Sechrest for Albertsons and Safeway. Ready to save, it's time for cyber deals. Put a spring in your step with fresh savings that brighten the season. These exclusive week-long digital offers on your favorite products are only when you shop online. Save on eligible items from Kettle, Chabani, Quaker, Skippy, Hidden Valley, International Delight, Frito Lay, and Signature Select. Available now through March 24th on pickup or delivery orders only. Restrictions apply. See website for full terms and conditions. I honestly think that's the main reason they haven't remade it. They might, what the fuck do we do with this? They might force you to change your scheme where you might have to go from,

from controller to PC or the other way around. That's interesting. I wonder what, what do you want to do on a cop? I hate what it does that. This is starting to freak me out. I'm going to check this. Way too big of an explosion. Yeah.

It's like, why did it do that? The screen, the screen that shows us what the camera shows, keeps doing this like flash mid episode and it's weird but um anyway so he writes writes in uh would you rather come violently every time you sneeze or have every adult human

within a 500 foot radius come violently every time you burp uh the ladder the ladder yeah I don't have to burp in front of people doesn't matter they still come though I mean I don't really the thing to me is just like I would the first one is an inconvenience to me

the second one one matters not at all to me. Yeah. So, like, obviously, it's going to be the second one. I'm going to pick that. But what if you burp? Like, what if you... I don't have to burp, and if I do, I'm usually, like, alone.

And so, like, I guess everybody around me is going to have a good time. It doesn't make... Makes no difference to me. They won't know it's me either. Yeah, they won't know it's me. If anything, it's just funny. If anything, it's just hilarious. I'd make myself burp and I'd watch people go, like, get the car crashes.

I'd be like... Oh, that's crazy. In a car? Oh, that's wild. Boom. Oh, yeah, those hard comers that just like fucking like tense up and shit. That's crazy. That's a genuinely dangerous person.

Hell yeah. Like to just like that's why I chose it. Like if they have a bad time and they're just, they drive around, they just burping on purpose. You go over freeway pass and just start burping. And then the car is going crazy. Boom. Someone's having a really serious surgery. You're looking over?

they come inside his fucking open woods his open body so wait how so they're dicks out they're not dicks out you know some people might be big loaders you know somebody was fucking actually edging and he's like

I can't wait to get home to finish and then he's like no right into the fucking is into his heart and an unconscious body person comes to yeah of course he's got to come and goes right into the

well well well he put his mask down and goes right to his mouth, he's choking and shit, he slips. The whole surgery is ruined. Killing people. This is because you got this power that you clearly don't deserve.

Yeah, I would do it. This is a good one. You guys hear it. Twink Floyd. That's good. Right, of course. Says if you guys were on an episode of House MD, what would your ridiculous

reason for being a patient be and what is the ridiculous cure? Somebody else commented, I for instance would have a gay hot dog disease. Gay hot dog disease. I like the idea that someone having one of their balls

trapped up their asshole, but not the way you think. What do you mean? Like instead of it, like one of his testicles is in his ass. He presuming to understand what I would think about that is crazy. Because the easy way you'd be like,

oh yeah, you'd stretch your ball and put it in your asshole. But I like the idea that genuinely one of his testicles floated up through his body and now is trapped, clenched inside of his asshole. It shouldn't be humanly possible.

I don't think that this happened That's crazy I'm gonna have to punch you in the neck To cure you All right Stay still I don't know What would my

What would my Man A house empty ailment To be cured by the Hugh Lory Yeah It's a big question I feel like there's so many avenues

That it could go What seems to be the problem Is house called Casa in Spanish Well Or it's still called house All right The question's abandoned now Never mind

It's still called That ruined everything. That ruined everything. That's still a name. So it's still a name. So it's still called house probably, right? El house. El house. Oh, you got to put O at the end. El House.

Otherwise, it's not Spanish anymore. I think I would have like, man. What appears, Mr. Pyley, do you have dick and ass syndrome? No, you know what it would be? It would be like, I would come in for stomach pains and then they just wouldn't know what the fuck it was. They would think, like, maybe at first they might think it's like, I don't know, cancer or like whatever, I don't know, one of the first things you think of when you're hurt. And it turns out that I just haven't, I haven't taken a shit in four years.

Mr. Malmado. You'd be so sick. It seems like there's a, you'd be so sick. You wouldn't have said you'd be dead in your system. But only weigh like, one, one, 16. What? Yeah. And somehow there's a live squirrel.

It's playing around. Playing around in there, digging around for nuts. The squirrel also trapped in that shade. I don't know. I don't know how it's still alive, but it is. I don't know how you manage this, sir. What do you want to name it? Name the squirrel now.

He's dead, by the way. Here's a lot. He's being moved around by bacteria. Excuse me, sorry. I thought he was alive. I thought he was alive. It turns out he's dead. It's a dead squirrel being moved around by...

There's so much live bacteria in your body that it's moving the squirrel around as if it's alive. Not unlike Amelia Earhart's lost vessel under the sea that was moved by famously, moved by a sea of crabs is migrating north. Right. Right, of course. That's true, by the way.

I don't know. What would yours? I don't know. Like, I'm stupid. I have a stomach gay. Oh, oh, oh, you're gay. Like, oh. Okay, great.

Amazing. Mr. Jameson, you're just gay. Leave. Like, what? Mr. Jameson, you're gay. I can't care you leave. That'll be $1,000. That'll be $2,000.

$10 bills. I'm going to find out you're just a homosexual male. Yeah. You imagine the price things. Like that? Like, you have, you can't, if it's not $2,010 bills, you're going to collection, buddy. You just ruin your credit. You just ruin your credit.

You go to the doctorate, you're just only $2. They're like, no, that's $2 million bills. You have one hour. You have one hour to come up with $2 million. Just leave. In two bills, by the way. You need two $1 million bills. At that moment, just leave.

You don't owe them anything. Mr. House, I need help. My ass is a magnet for male. penises. Oh. Like, like, I'm serious. What seems to be the issue? If I get too close to a penis,

my ass attracts it and the penis gets inserted in my ass. Are you sure? Turn around. Watch. I'll pull your pants down. I'm serious. I'm not going to pull my pants down.

Well, what about Dr. Foreman? Forman's like, please leave me alone. Leave me out of this, nigga. Leave me out of this, you fucking queer. Watch this. You're just gay Get out of here You and Mr. Jameson are just gay

I'm not gay though Yeah you are I know medically you are I approved it with science The Big Cheese The Big Cheese wrote in Simple question for Sween since he's mentioned Common Rider on the pod a couple times What's your favorite which is your favorite one

Which one's your favorite? Common Rider I don't even know actually I don't know anything about Common Rider I think Seed I just know the American version Power Rangers fucking Tyler no

Masked writer is fucking trash. Oh, mass writers. Oh, okay. And empowering to Super Sentai instead of, yeah. Of course. Yeah, okay. But yeah, they had a mass writer. It was fucking bad, dude. It was really bad.

It was bad about it. Just everything. The actors that they chose. Just everything. The lead to play the fucking masked rider, the common writer. Apparently, it's apparently like Power Rangers is pretty good. Like, Super Sentai is pretty good in Japan. It's like fucking hilarious.

And then it's like, crazy. And then it's like, here we get like, I like, I like Power Rangers even. And it's like, it's like, it's like, It's so much worse here compared to what it was there. And it's like, why? I started watching the, well, because there was, so it was, you had Simon doing the shit in America, the Power Rangers. And then after a while, Disney took over. It was kind of cool.

And then it just, who knows what the fuck's going on now. I don't really give it to Nickelodeon. Nickelodeon got it back. Nickelodeon had it? I guess. I don't remember Nickelodeon having it, but like, yeah. They had it for samurai and Megaforce and all that shit. Like the generation is that you definitely want to watch it.

That was on Nickelodeon and not Disney? Disney was. Disney was Jungle Fury, Wild Force, SPD, Mystic Force. So most of them? It was everything after, everything after, Ninja Storm. Everything after the Nidstorm was Disney. I hate that character. Oh.

The guy with the weird, like, tentacles on his shoulders. What's his guy's name? That's Slayer. Alistair. Smyth. There you go. He's got alien dicks on his shoulders. And you know, like, he looks nothing like that in the comments.

Like, I don't know where they got that design in particular. I love that design. I hate it so much. I just love how stupid he looks. He looks like fucking. He reminds me. Where are they at? This is New York.

So, update. I fed my Chris Hansen Tamagachi wrote in. He says, hey, Frando. This question is more directed at Chris, but Sween is more than welcome to interrupt. My boss told me that if he was my... Hello, hello, I'm Malcolm Gladwell, host of the podcast Smart Talks with IBM. I recently sat down with IBM's chairman and CEO, Arvin Krishna. And I asked him, how can companies use AI to its fullest potential to create smarter business?

My one advice to them, pick areas you can scale. Don't pick the shiny little toys on the side. For example. If anybody has more than 10% of the kids, what they had for customer service 10 years ago, they're already five years behind. If anybody is not using AI to make their developers who write software 30% more productive today,

with the goal of being 70% more productive. So we are not asking our clients to be the first experiment on it. We say, you can leverage what we did. We're happy to bring out all our learnings, including what needs to change in the process, Because the biggest change is not technology, is getting people to accept that there's a different way to do things. To listen to the full conversation, visit IBM.com slash smart talks. Hey, it's Ryan Seacrest for Albertsons and Safeway.

Ready to save, it's time for cyber deals. Put a spring in your step with fresh savings that brighten the season. These exclusive week-long digital offers on your favorite products are only available when you shop online. Save on eligible items from Kettle, Chabani, Quaker, Skippy, Hidden Valley, International Delight, Frito Lay, and Signatures Select. Available now through March 24th on pickup or delivery orders only. Restrictions apply.

See website for full terms and conditions. Hi, Hyde, he would take his own life. No. For context, I'm 5'4. As a fellow vertically challenged man, do you actually care about height? I can't name one instance where I wish I was taller. There's like small issues of like convenience where I was like,

oh, man, it would be convenient, like at a show or something. You know what I mean? It's like, oh, it would be nice to be taller. But like outside of that, like, yeah, I found it to be more convenient generally. Like getting on a plane, like having a more like being on a plane doesn't feel as cramped. Although that's what blows my mind about planes to me is that even at my height, I feel like, yo, this is small. Like I feel cramped as fucking this. How is this even remotely usable for anybody who's normal height?

It's completely fucked up. I was just talking to lady was talking to me on the train, you know, against my will. And she mentioned how like it's crazy. how convenient and comfortable trains are compared to planes. It's insane. Yeah. Because they just maximize profits on the plane

so they just sardine you. Yeah. And I swear to God, too. Like when I was like, when I was like, when I was like nine, I remember the seats being way bigger. I'm sure they were. Oh, yeah.

I'm sure. That's a good joke. I think they also were though. I think also true. That's true. No, I think both. Especially when they started having those, when they had those

cheap airlines like frontier and there's other ones. You know, Spirit. Spirit Frontier. Fly airlines. A lot of them, their first line of planes were like fucking prison planes. Like they were like, the seats were like metal on the bottom.

Like you can tell them were like for, I think, arm your prison transport or something and not like for, and then eventually they started upgrading. Because I took a spirit one time years and years ago. And I was like, this is the worst. Like usually I would always be to people,

y'all are complaining too much. Like, just chill the fuck out. There's no temperature control. It's just like a, It's like a metal tin. It's just like, it's just freezing. It was pretty wild. I was like, oh, this is really bad.

I actually, this is fair. If anyone wants to complain about this. But it's slightly better, but it's still shit. You know what I'm saying? But yeah, the height thing, I always, the people that freak out, I always say that, you know, they are not, they don't really have anything going for them. So they have their height. So it's like, oh, I kill myself on how much. That means that you suck.

and your height is the only thing good you have going for you. That is kind of crazy. Yeah, I didn't even think about it that way. It's completely there because otherwise, why would you give a shit? Because I've met some people that are tall, but they're also really talented.

They do stuff. And they're not just talented because they're height, like a basketball player. You know, some people, I just dunk. No, like, they do stuff. So, like, their height is completely an afterthought. Sure. So that person, that boss probably only gets pussy because of his height

and couldn't pull women if he was short because he would be like, oh, I'm insecure and gay. You know, like, what do you mean? Just talk to him and you can have women. I'm shrinking, too. It's crazy. I think I mentioned that. I noticed that you were closer to the least height

than I remember you being before. And I was like, what the fuck? My injuries, I think, are catching up with me, like, at a rapid pace. Just get another vertebrae. Well, if I get surgery, if I get, if I get a proof for it, I can definitely, they can fix mine. Because there was a guy that would do jihitchu all the time. and then he got a surgery and he added an extra inch to him.

Oh, damn. Yeah, which I can do it for you. I've, uh, no, I'm good. I can grab your neck and grab your lower back and you yank you to you fucking grow. I probably like shrunk like an inch and a half, dude, it's crazy. That's actually crazy. Yeah, because I started, I was looking at Jojo and I was like, what the fuck? She's towering over me.

I was like, it didn't used to be like this exaggerated. You know what you should do next time she's sitting down, go behind her, go like to top of her head, so she's short again. Really hard, though. I will. commit. I will again. Okay. Joe, go look out. He's got his contract. I never cared about

being tall or short, I guess. I wanted to be a little tall so I could dunk easier when I was younger, but I never really cared. Never like a big deal. It's only ever been in like literally. It's annoying having like my legs being able, like touching the seeds. Even when I was like thin. It was just like, oh, just my legs are always touching. Because I have long legs in particular. Oh, like in a plane? That's why. Like it sucks.

When I drive sometimes like my legs are like touching the thing on a car like the, Oh, because he couldn't go back enough. So just like, that sucks, but like other than that, it's like whatever. It's literally just minor points of convenience. I think it is a little more convenient to be average height than tall, actually. I would say, be like, five, nine. 5, 10, man, I think I think you're coasting.

5, 8, 59, man, maybe 5.7. Like, it's just convenient. No, that's too small. Why? Well, I would say. Well, I'm saying, perfect. It was exactly. It was.

I'm lying on my driver's license. If I was 58, I'd be fine. I would say, 510, because to me, because at that point you made about, like, being able to see at shows, 510 would be great. Because that is a fucking problem,

especially when some fucking behemoth, he, like, gets in front of a lot of people. And I'm like, doesn't have enough sense to be like, you're so tall, you can go a little bit further in the back. That's such a crazy thing we can be able to do. I literally instinctively think that.

I'm not, people don't think that. It's like, oh, I'm tall. I should get out the way. Like, I try to sit down to movies immediately because I'm like, oh, I'm big and I'm tall. People are not going to be able to,

see but some people just don't do that and I'm like why are you not doing that people people in general are just very inconsiderate yeah you know humans are I considerate yes it's like I went to go pee in the in the train and then there's piss all over the floor well that was me I pissed in my fucking face while I was trying to pee yeah excuse me that he's like holding up and it's and a flash floods you damn that was a recap never mind never mind I was like damn I was like they kiss twice the spider man's coming the web comes out like that is like

I love this battle man Anyway let's see I was gonna call him the predator What's his name? The publisher The predator Hell yeah, dude God Christ

Monoco watching a Tarantino Watching a Tarantino marathon And then it cuts it off Nice Rode in He says hello my favorite pumpkin spice Oreo With a recent statement From the director of Expedition 33

Saying that Claire Obscure Will be a franchise with each entry being a completely different story with different characters. I knew it. Would you want a painters versus writers game in the same world of Expedition 33 or just a completely different world altogether?

I don't really want a series of this, to be honest. Yeah, I knew it. It makes sense for them. Like, I don't blame them for doing it, like, get your bag. But, like, I... I don't want another expedition game. I want it to be like...

Like, different, different. Like, maybe same world, but different concept interacting. I would want... I would want that gameplay style in a completely... different thing. Like, do you tell a completely different story in a completely different world, like not the same lore or anything? That's what they're implying. Well, they said

like it's a series. Well, yeah, like Final Fantasy. Oh, then that's fine. If that's true, maybe. Well, how would it not be that? Well, I don't know. They do the writers. It's not no, well, could you read again? I'm sorry. Maybe I misunderstood. He just said Claire Obscure will be a franchise. Which,

I mean, I just don't, I don't know. Final Fantasy is really the only thing that does that. And I think it's smart to do that and to like No, I would agree. I would run for its money. That would be cool. But like my assumption, because

Final Fantasy is the only thing that really does that when I hear that they're going to franchise this thing, I think of more like Mass Effect or, you know, oh, this is going to continue the world. Oh, I, it just makes zero. I think that it was I think it was, that line was sequel.

Like it could, it's, it's vague. Yeah. But like, I guess my brain immediately went to because that story is completed. Sure. Like, it, it, it, it would only make sense because that was just one family in their world so it could focus on another you know oh we're going to focus on some other some other people because they mentioned like the rivalry right so we're just going to focus on some other people and they're going to dip into another world and it's like an endless possibility type thing um like I was assuming that's what

they do because like if they did something like oh you know mass effect four we're going to continue this I'm like what the fuck are we doing yeah this this uh Verso um, myel, all those people, we, we, we,

we, we, we're done. I want their story to be done. Yeah, I don't want to touch them anymore. Yeah. So hopefully,

hopefully it's that. Like, I guess my brain just immediately would like, of course it has to do that. Well, because my thing is just like, oh,

well, they might focus on the, you know, the writers and, like, I mean, that, just that world or whatever.

And I'm just like, ah. Yeah. Like, it would be nice if they just, like, took that gameplay model and just did,

like, came up with different stories and different genres or whatever. Like it would be cool to see like a sci-fi thing of this or like a old or even like a medieval version of this or like fucking contemporary version of it like or that's...

I guess they can't do that though, right? It's a great gameplay model. Whatever's in the painted world it could be anything. They could do that. I don't mind. I don't mind them going with the writers. I don't mind going with the writers

because the writers are so detached from that. Yeah, I don't really care about that to be honest. That world is like not the same world and that's why I think it's interesting because it's like we could have a completely different world.

They probably will focus on the writers next time since we don't know anything about them. And they were brought up to, you know. If they can do it in a way that's cool, like, fine, I just kind of miss when we just would get these, like, one-off, like, great game. That's what I was hoping Death Stranding would be.

Like, when Death Stranding came out, I was like, this is great. And then there's a sequel. I was like, and the sequel's good, but I'm just like, eh, this would be a better one-off. There's no way Kojima wasn't going to be put on to be a sequel, though. I know, I know. Hello, hello. I'm Malcolm Gladwell, host of Smart Talks with IBM. I recently spoke with IBM's new director

research, Jake Embatta, we discussed his vision for the future of quantum computing. At IBM research, what we always do is answer what is the future of computing, whether it's coming up with new algorithms, coming up with better AI, coming up with quantum, or coming up with just how do different accelerators go together. It's our DNA to answer the question of what is the future. Isn't it a perfect problem for IBM because you kind of need to have a legacy of building stuff? Yes. Building actual physical machines. Yeah, it's why I came to IBM.

I wanted the experience, the culture of building hard things that others have not done before. Where do you imagine we are in the timeline of this technology? There will come a point when it will mature. Right? My cell phone is a mature technology at this point. How far are we from that point with Conton? By 2029, we'll build the first fault-tolerant quantum computer. That is one that can run a very, very large, large problem.

To learn how IBM is building the future of computing, visit IBM.com slash quantum. Hey, it's Ryan Seacrest for Albertsons and Safeway. Ready to save, it's time for cyber deals. Put a spring in your step with fresh savings that brighten the season. These exclusive week-long digital offers on your favorite products are only available when you shop online. Save on eligible items from Kettle, Chabani, Quaker, Skippy, Hidden Valley, International Delight, and Signatures Select. Available now through March 24th on pickup or delivery orders only.

Restrictions apply. See website for full terms and conditions. No, I know, but like it's, nothing can succeed without a sequel now. It kind of bummed down. Claire Ops gear popped just way too hard. Yeah. Yeah, it was inevitable. Here's more money.

Especially Microsoft. They're like, here, take, help, help, help. I just think about it. It's so funny, though, because I just think about, like, so many, like, we used to get so many just one-off. Yeah. Shout to the Colossus. Right. Shadow the Colossus.

It's one of the things where it's like, I think, you know, like, that was it. If it was made in modern time, there would have been sequels, though. If it wasn't made when it was made, it'd be sequels. And to be fair, we've always had sequels. I'm not saying, like, it's new, but, like. Interesting enough, it would have, and even if that game was made today, it would have done well because it's, like, kind of like a boss gauntly, you know? Is Out of the Colosses? Yeah.

You know what I mean? I think it's so good. Like how interesting enough it would, it's not, I think it's a, it could do well at any time period, really. Yeah. Solid game friend.

It's a solid game idea. Just go find boss, climb boss, kill boss. Yeah. Go find boss. Climb boss kill boss. It is cool, man. Let's see.

Okay, we're making good time. We're getting through a lot of questions here. Yeah, see you later, guys. All right. Special needs, Cannon. I love that.

What is this? I love that. What is this? It just turns you like slow. You just, no, no, no. But you don't know what type of mental health. You just know,

you feel fine. You go home and you go home and you're like, oh shit. Oh, interesting. What? What is this? DJ Spit wrote in, not a question,

but wanted to top the last two guys' stories relating to sex toys. Iraq, 2003. Oh, God. He opened it like a fucking... Like a script. Like a script. This is not good.

Exterior Desert Day is basically, you know what I mean? USMC-311, a nobody, a nobody but caught wind. A unit was allegedly going to a whorehouse during night combat patrols. So naturally, we were all asking questions. Remember, we're all sexually frustrated 19, 20-year-old boys. Some never even got late. I can imagine. That's got to be crazy.

That sucks. And you're just shipped off to fight And you're just sexually frustrated Shit desert Oh not even You have to bathe with like fucking Wet wipes You gotta go outside at night

And jerk off on the scorpions Sting your penis In return Ah Yeah yeah So naturally we're all asking questions Yeah but got no answers And eventually we dropped it

Wasn't really an issue Till a bunch of guys from first Platoon Kilo company got herpes All around the same time Brass thinks They have to be fucking someone. So they gather us all up and Doc goes, okay, guys, where's the whores?

We ain't leave until we get to the bottom of this dick epidemic. Fucking Marines turn red. Some look at the ground. It wasn't long before some private goes, Doc, there's no horrors. We've been sharing a pocket pussy. What?

All I remember was Doc saying, Jesus Christ, boys, at least clean the damn thing. After that, Doc ordered a pallet of hand sanitizer for the keel. company, we all had to laugh for a bit. That's crazy. That is so outrageous. I guess you're in a... Nope. I don't know.

I can't imagine the first time I heard of that story. I can't imagine being in that scenario ever because I just, I don't, like what is just use your hand, man. There's nothing wrong with jacking off. There's literally nothing wrong with it. Like it's completely fine. I don't need a simulated

fake pussy to share with my band of bros, dude. That's That is so fucking insane. Like, they should have just, oh, man, they should have rather said, like, oh, we all fucked a goat or something. We all fuck each other. I feel like that's, like, less weird than like, I'm going to, this guy's blasting. I don't know if that's like this toy.

That's fair. That is, it's not. He kept talking himself good and he was like, oh, yeah. I'm just thinking of how, like, how disgusting that is. I'm like, yeah, that is fucking a goat is insane. Yeah, because it's, you're raping an animal. an animal, yes. I completely take that back.

But I'm just thinking of how to scud. I know what you mean, though. Just this moldy growth, like, bro, what? Yeah. Like, no, like, go. Even though it is weirder, I'd be like, go fucking animal. I know what you're saying. Like, I understand the spirit of what you're saying.

If you're doing that, might as well fucking animal, but also don't fucking animal. Yeah, don't fucking animal. But like, you're closer to fucking an animal than you would be if you just didn't fuck the flashlight. Yeah. So what's the difference, really? You know? There's a difference. But like, I get it.

Is that better? Huh? What? What? Let's go on. I didn't say anything. Let's move on. I said nothing.

I said nothing. I didn't say a thing. I didn't say anything. I swear. I plead the fifth. Do, uh, do Maria Oliver wrote in. Oh, let's see if there's any news. Oh, yeah.

Check out the thing. Trump publicly. I don't have any clever names, but I would like to ask, what do you do when you feel like your dream is slipping away from you? We're getting dark. We're getting serious. Uh, I'm, 30 and I feel like I'm too old to go after my dream of writing for movies and TV,

wanted to write for video games, but that industry has turned to a wet match in a dark cave. Listen, you just got to do it, man. Like, I understand that sounds like, like, dumb advice.

But the whole thing of like, it's, I don't know, I don't want to tell people to not be realistic. Yeah. But at the same time, I do kind of feel like, you just kind of have to continue to do shit until it works.

I know so many people who didn't like pop off until like way late, you know? And it really is a matter of like how you, like, it really is a matter of like who you know for this shit. And to be fair, TVs and movies, like that's a whole fucking that's a whole cluster fuck. But I don't know. I mean, it's a serious question, I guess.

Yeah. What do you guys have to say about it? Just give up. Just give up. No, it's, it's, look, man, it's over when you're, when you're, when you're, when You're satisfied or dead. That's basically one that's over, like the dream chasing. Yeah.

And you're satisfied. You're like, oh, I tried my best. I'm good. Or you're dead. So basically, just keep trying. I think about some of my most favorite comedians at the time, a lot of them popped, like, at 40. Yeah. Like, they're fucking old as shit and starting to gray already before they got that one special or whatever the fuck it was.

Actress, too. many actors and probably like they're like 45 and then they just get this role the thing about Pedro Pascal who's like one of the biggest actors that dude popped way late in the fucking Game of Thrones

he's been acting forever he was on a Buffy dude he was I saw the thing of surviving off of residuals from Buffy that one of parents like kept him kept trying it gave him just enough money to stay

that's so much thing is he dies so quickly I never saw it dies I was like that's Pedro Pascow Hello. Spoilers. Yeah, I'm so upset. I'm so upset. I've never seen him of the vampire.

Vampire 8. Pedro Pascal dies randomly. I didn't, yeah, I never got into it. I've heard good things. I love Buffy. I was,

you know, I wasn't really well. Josh Whedon is a fucking cock. The thing, that guy, he should be skin. He seems weird, but you know,

he seems strange. I like cabin, though. The thing that I would say, the thing that I would say is just like, uh, I don't know, man,

just keep, keep doing it. But also, really do it. I know a lot of people who are like, oh, I'm trying, oh, I'm really trying, but they're not really. They're kind of like, they're in the stages of, like, planning, or they're in the stages of, like,

they think they're doing something when they're not really. What did he say he wanted to do, be a writer? He wanted to do a writing. And it seems like, for anything, like, it seems like, for movies, TV, video games, like anything. Brother, like, I just feel like, if you want to do that much, maybe even widen it a little bit.

You know what I mean? Like don't necessarily don't limit yourself to these things. Yeah. Right for fucking. Dude, I would first say try to write for YouTubers, man. Yeah. Get on that machine where like so many successful YouTubers now just have a team. Yeah.

And it's one of those things that I never quite got to because I was, I kind of, it's not really my thing because I was more of a stupid ranter. So it didn't, it wouldn't work for me even. But like I thought of the idea of doing that, how being in that position. to where it's like okay I have the editor I have my writer I have this and we have this team and then we all just divvy up the funds and we kill it because god they're so the amount of people when I hear them when they're speaking they say we you know even though there's the host of the video yeah and I'm like oh it's this fucking crew like even say it's we like I appreciate that I appreciate that he's saying we like it's not trying to pretend like this motherfucker is doing it

all themselves you know it's impossible to do all yourself now and now like especially if you want to pump them like some of the videos that people are pumping out like uh it's a guy every once in a while I try to check out his video is this guy Patrick C.C. And like his like he's got a crew with them. Otherwise, you can't pump out shit that often, but sometimes

Hello, hello. I'm Malcolm Gladwell, host of Smart Talks with IBM. I recently spoke with IBM's new director of research, Jake Gambata. We discussed his vision for the future of quantum computing. At IBM research, what we always do is answer what

is the future of computing, whether it's coming up with new algorithms, coming up with better AI, coming up with quantum, or coming up with just how do different accelerators go together? It's our DNA to answer the question of what is the future. Isn't it a perfect problem for IBM because you kind of need to have a legacy of building stuff? Yes. Building actual physical machines. Yeah, it's why I came to IBM. I wanted the experience, the culture of building hard things that others have not done before. Where do you imagine we are in the timeline of this technology?

There will come a point when it will mature. My cell phone is a mature technology at this point. How far are we from that point with Conta? By 2029, we'll build the first fault-tolerant quantum computer. That is one that can run a very, very large problem. To learn how IBM is building the future of computing, visit IBM.com slash quantum. Hey, it's Ryan Sechrest for Albertsons and Safeway. Ready to save, it's time for cyber deals.

Put a spring in your step with fresh savings that brighten the season. These exclusive week-long digital offers on your favorite products are only available when you shop online. Save on eligible items from Kettle, Chabani, Quaker, Skippy, Hidden Valley, International Delight, Frito Lay, and Signature Select. Available now through March 24th On pickup or delivery orders only Restrictions apply See website for full terms and conditions

Because I can tell you as a crew Because I'm like Sometimes the writing's a little It's I'm like Ah that wasn't a good one You know I was like ah That wasn't your best work Whoever wrote that

That wasn't their best work Yeah you should kill that guy I watched a Rogan one He was talking about the comedy things Like why does that comedy suck now or something Sure And like some of the things that he was saying Were it was like

The person that wrote this They seem like they're somewhat of a fan of Rogan Because they didn't they were saying things like oh the Rogan would use the thing Mainstream narrative Well I don't want I just want to I don't believe in mainstream narrative I want to get a different opinion And I'm like mainstream narrative was kind of like a

Was it kind of like a talking point to dismiss like Consensus in like empirical data Sure like oh here's all these really well people But they would say mainstream narrative And I was like that's a clever way to dismiss it And he was just saying it like, oh, well, this is what he was just actually trying to do. And I'm like, ah, that seems weird.

I know, I know, I know this guy knows better, but he's just reading the script. And now it's like, it's like telltales like that. But anyway, point being, there's people that are doing great work like that and say there's other people probably looking for that constantly. I don't know where. You know, like, you know, there's, I don't know if there's like places where people post. Yeah. Like, I'm looking for a script writer.

It's got to be something. I mean, Claire Obscure, that, that whole thing. It was written by some dude who just Put his stuff out there Like on Reddit or something, right? Like, wasn't that what it was? That's true. It was some stuff like that, yeah.

So like, I don't know, my advice would be like to actually go out Because a lot of this is networking too, like, realistically. Like you're not gonna, you're not gonna just like... That's the easiest way, yeah. You're not going to just like, like, generally speaking, unless you have like an insane,

like he break, like the clear obscure person. You're not going to just like sit in your room, write, put it on the internet and just not interact with anybody and then find success. Like you gotta, if there are writers, summits or like if there are like you know it's hard for me to even imagine this space but like almost like a comic con type environment for like there are these there are events set up in like

cities and in places that are centered around these careers go to them yes yep like straight up go to them absolutely yeah if i yeah absolutely if i try to break into the industry i'm going to everything yeah everything i'm investing heavily Best your time, energy. Practice your craft as much as possible. What is possible that's, like, healthy for your mind. Obviously, you know, use your pen. That's your sword to be able to figure out of getting a picture through.

And then find people that are writing. Don't be afraid to, you know, not copy ideas, but find inspiration and stuff that's writing. And make yourself available for it. That's the biggest thing. Availability. Being available to find your break is a very important thing. Because I have a lot of friends who are talented people, but they're talented and they're stubborn. and they don't want to try to open up the paths to let them succeed,

particularly in a creative field. Because unfortunately, a creative field, you very rarely succeed. So it would be off your own ideas, you know. You have to make sure you're able to, you know, mesh with the way the world is moving. Ideal-wise. So you got to be doing it, you know. You got to wear a lot of hats, too. It's annoying.

I hate it. You got to be a business guy. You got to be a networking guy. It's tough. On top of being good at the thing that people, want to see from you. That's the toughest thing, right? Like being able to, because that's what my instinct goes off.

My brain's not built for all that shit. No, I hate it. Especially the business aspect of it. It's why I understand like the potential of this brand. I get it. But then there's just my brain just like doing the tact tactical stuff to go to a higher level. For me it's for me it's the brown nosing and fucking I can't do that shit. Like I just my brain just shuts off.

And I'm like, I need to do this. I need to send an email. I, I don't want to fuck. I can't schmooze. I can't do that shit. I don't have it in me. I can't schmose to people. I just,

it doesn't, it doesn't work. Like, if I don't like you, and I get a sense, I don't like you, I'm logging out of a conversation with you. I'm not going to like, yeah.

I'm not going to be. I'm not. And that's why I can never truly succeed in the business side of like, of anything, really. I just, I just, I can't succeed there. If you can get lucky.

Because my mind. I can't do it. is hard. It's, it's, I need to, like, really, like, I need to prep myself to do it. Yeah. I need to, like, an hour of silence before I go out and do shit like that. And it's exhausting. Sure.

But, uh, I don't know. I can't even do, like, creator to get together. That should have just burnt me so much. I'd be like, oh, this is just, because I get in there and it's inherently transactional immediately. You're not there to show you're there to transaction with people. And I'm like, I can't do this. Well, not necessarily.

I, no, but yes, you know? Like, yeah. I've never really done it with the intention of transactions. That's you. Yeah. That's not, you're not. I think people respond well to that, though. You're not the vast majority of people, though, unfortunately.

I guess so. Unfortunately. People also, but I will say, though, people that are in the industry, they know, though. They're aware. They're aware, so a lot of times it isn't as offensive as it normally should be. Because especially if you're kind of, like, perceived to be on similar levels where it's like, oh, you know, let's lift each other's boats. Even people I'm friends with, like, I'm like, I don't chill with them on purpose. I'm not like, I don't want to, like, hang out when you, you, like, you know people.

that are doing stuff and I'm like I kind of just want to hang out with you like that chill but like not it feels weird to like oh let's just chill out you know you have to like create like a very friendly rapport before I even feel comfortable even hanging out with them

whereas like you see me plenty of times as someone that's never been like the idea to ask you something about things that's big homo speak right there you're not saying it so that's impossible hey whoa That was a silent hard art What do you mean?

It was on me It clearly saw me saying Slowly mouth And I'm zoom in on their mouth Your lips All right Scooped James wrote in I've heard it's gotten a while

Scooped one Scooped James He says hello My three gay Polyomera Polyamorous dads Would you rather Lose 5 inches

From your dick Or gain 10 inches I'd rather not I would really That's a day Those are dangerous numbers. I really don't want either of these. Yeah, but I would have to go with gain and then do porn.

Yeah, I guess I'd rather have more and not needed. I'm not going to have a 10 inches more to your dick is crazy. It is crazy. That is crazy. It would be too much. Of course it's crazy. It would be too much. But also.

But five inches less is also crazy. To me, that's crazier. It is crazier. Like, your penis is not useful anymore. Either way. Yeah, right. Exactly. Because, like, having a, having a foot long penis is not useful even in porn, really.

They'll find, like, there's niches. There'll be zoo porn effectively. Especially just taking pictures is, like, oik, ozo porn. Like, zoo porn type of shit. Just taking pictures is enough. Like, you don't necessarily have to, like, fuck anybody. Yeah, you may bank off only van. Like, just having a giant dong.

Like, people are going to be like, whoa, the novelty. Why aren't you using it? I can't. I don't want to kill people. I'm going to, no, I'm going to fucking pass out. Like, there's too much blood allocated to the area. I'm dizzy. The idea is someone taking a dick pick and then passing out.

Like, they set up the prompt, they get hard, they take a pick, and then they have to quickly sit down or I'll start cooked. That's not a useful penis. Yeah, big pee-b. That scenario. That's not a useful penis, yeah. That's so crazy. It's, like, it just had this.

Lootie-toons dick. Your dick looks like. Your dick looks like It's like a kill boss of sausage, bro. Hell yeah. It's just like this is not useful to have. What is this? We'll do one more.

It's my balls. One more, that's perfect. We'll do one more. I'll start the names. I like it. We got it. This is the mode that I'm liking. Rig it.

Realize because we can cover anything. Yeah. But I also like it because every once in a while, like I normally don't care what people are saying, but everyone wants to be like, oh, I'm overwhelmed. I'm overwhelmed with all the content. I'm like, is it too much? Tell them, shut the fuck up. Is it too much?

Is it too long and people are feeling like suffocated? That's one of the few things that's in the back of my head. Normally, like if somebody complains about something, I'm like, shut up. I'm like, shut up. It's a fucking comedy. You know what I'm saying? I don't even. Like shut up as a comedy show.

But then I'm like, I think of it as me as someone who actually listens a podcast. I'm like, all right, how would I feel if I had this much? Would I feel a little bit like, oh, I'm getting bombarded? So I was like kind of feeling like, yeah. I get what you mean. It's like, but at the same time it's like, it's not,

you don't have to listen to it immediately. You don't. That's why you parse it out. It's not about like, we're just, we're just not wired that way though. Unfortunately, TV has fucked us.

Sorry, not TV streaming where it's like, if you get so much and then people get like, oh, oh, I'm overwhelmed. I guess. I just,

because I know, I agree. To me, it's more like the, it's like, cool, I can take my time. Fuck.

I have so much content. I can, I don't know. Most people I think are happy, though. So I'm just saying. Yeah. It's more of a self-conscious observation. What the fuck is this?

Hello, hello. I'm Malcolm Gladwell, host of the podcast Smart Talks with IBM. I recently sat down with IBM's chairman and CEO, Arvin Krishna. And I asked him, how can companies use AI to its fullest potential to create smarter business? My one advice to that. Pick areas you can scale. Don't pick the shiny little toys on the side. For example.

If anybody has more than 10% of what they had for customer service 10 years ago, they're already five years behind it. If anybody is not using AI to make their developers who write software 30% more productive today, with the goal of being 70% more productive, Yeah. Wow. So we are not asking our clients to be the first experiment on it. We say you can leverage what we did. We're happy to bring out all our learnings, including what needs to change in the process,

because the biggest change is not technology, is getting people to accept that there's a different way to do things. To listen to the full conversation, visit IBM.com slash smart talks. Hey, it's Ryan Seacrest for Albertsons and Safeway. Ready to save. It's time for cyber deals. Put a spring in your step with fresh savings that brighten the season.

These exclusive week-long digital offers on your favorite products are only available when you shop online. Save on eligible items from Kettle, Chabani, Quaker, Skippy, Hidden Valley, International Delight, Frito Lay, and Signature Select. Available now through March 24th

on pickup or delivery orders only. Restrictions apply. See website for full terms and conditions. I'm still trying to find a good one. I'll just pick this one whenever. Fun. Pleo TCA. I don't know what this question is.

I'm just going to read it. How's it going Joel or Mike, Tom Servo, and Crow T-Bat? Besides Keith David, did you guys have other most wants for guests on the podcast? Alternatively, were there any podcasts you guys wanted to guest

are on? Personally, I would have liked to see you guys guest star on the pizza party podcast before it ended. What the fuck's the pizza party podcast? I think I heard of it. Is that the one with the Ninja Turtles? What?

Were they gang bang April And we're just sitting there quietly Oh man This is crazy How many porns have exist of that How many porn are there separate That are fucking Way too many clearly

Oh it's Rebel taxi And splinter fucking April And splinter's gross ass A lot of saying it's cane Go be a bitch I would like to go I would like to go I would

I mean, I wouldn't mind being on most things. Like, if I was on Rogan, I'd go. You know? Yeah, I'd go on Rogan. I would do it. I'd go on Rogan. I don't know if they would air it. Yeah, same thing, yeah.

But, like, I would go on. That's the problem. It wouldn't, it wouldn't make it because I wouldn't, I couldn't softball that shit. I would, I would try and, I would try and play it so, like, maybe he's not aware. That's sort of suspect. I, yeah, yeah, yeah. I want to see, like, how smart is he that he'll, pick up on the fact that I'm clearly.

Oh, really? Word? Yeah. I really would like, I wouldn't be an asshole, but I would just grill him in the way that, hey man, I used to look up to you, you know, like you had a good podcast back in the day like over 10 years ago, you know, I know that you were a very secular person and you believed in this, this, that, you know, I'd be like, oh, what happened? Like, how come you don't believe in those things anymore? Like, just shit, like being very calm, but calling him out and be like, why are you a

completely different person in 10 years. That's actually kind of like only happens to people that are in fucking prison for murder. Then they become born again. You know what I'm saying? Like it's a traumatic thing happened and then you turn into a completely different person. But you understand it because it's because of trauma. I'm like, what the fuck happened to you? Yeah.

Well, what did you get raped? Does he have, uh, does he have parents? Yes, but they, uh, I don't know about his mom, but his dad hates him. Oh. His dad's like some old shriveled guy like fucking Joe Rogan this, that. because Joe has talked a lot of shit about his dad and his dad is fired back but I'm pretty sure his dad sucks too

Yeah, I mean his sister was in it Joe Rogan. Yeah His sister was in one of the videos I saw the videos of this stuff It's crazy when you see the family members I saw a Tim Poole sister She was washing dishes

In a video just talking mad shit about how much Tim Poul sucks Really? Yeah That's so funny Yeah like basically the family's like Obviously not cool with them I know his brother was cool with them

for a while. I don't know if they're cool anymore. They seem to have a Chris. Yeah, they seem to have a breakup. Yeah, I don't know. Something happened. Like they were like doing something. Something happened. And I couldn't tell it was a bit because he, Chris was, Chris was like a troll. He was a professional. Like a professional. So I could. Like actually? Yeah. He was a, yeah, yeah. He was behind a bunch of stuff that was like really famous. Yes. That I can't remember exactly. Neither do I.

There's not. My family is idiot. He seemed like a nice guy. He fucking, I, I couldn't figure him out. He even bought like one of my merch. And I was like, I didn't know if I was like, are you mocking me? He was funny. He was funny. Yeah. Like I didn't have, but like I asked him specifically, like, are you serious about the Tim Poole thing?

He was actually. I remember he sent me, I forgot. He sent me something to confirm that he was beefing with Tim Poole for reals. I forgot about that. It's weird because. So yeah, they had a falling out of. Because like, I think about it. Like, if my family, like, if let's say something happens, I don't think my family

ever be like, oh, I hate Kingston. They'd be like he has done some jerk shit, but he's not like a hateable guy. Right. You're not actively, like, poisoning the well or trying to ruin society, though. Or even like, even like interpersonally family-wise. I'm so, like, passive with my family, you know? Like, it was like, oh, I left.

But, like, other than that, like, I didn't. There's no reason to, like, we're talking about, like, Joe Rogan and, like, people like that, that their family actively comes out because they're doing stuff to harm society. Barring that, usually family are, like, going to be like, yeah, he's a bit of a dick, but I love him, he's family.

That's usually the default, right? Yeah. Most people give the benefit of the doubt. But if you're actively, grifting and ruining society that's different. I don't even know man. I don't know what to say about that guy. I would like to go I would like to go on I would have went on the

what you call it the um the Stavros one I forgot what it's called. Oh come down? I've been going to a new one that's current one I would do on. Oh it's going on Stavvy's World? Stavvy's World is actually it would seem pretty fun because I like the the call in stuff too. These people calling for like the dumbest shit and like actually you want to be a part of that. We should do Collins. I think

I think we really that I think that's like It would be just as fucked as that show. I think that makes it funny. I mean, I'm not like another tier for Collins. I think that'd be fucking amazing. If we could set up a, if we could set up,

that should be the fucking, Patreon, no, Discord tier. Yeah, we can, we can, we can,

we can, I can literally do that in the day because we just get the Google voice. Oh yeah? Google, you do Google voice. You can get a, you can get it,

uh, cognitive distance of podcast. That's how they, used to do their voicemails. They would use Google Voice, you get a phone number. So it's just attached to whatever you use your phone number and Google gives you a phone number. As long as you use it, it's active, then you're good. So I can just get that.

Do that tonight. I can easily do that. That's a perfect thing. Yeah. And then be like, all right, here's the tier. Yeah. That's just more extra content, literally. Yeah.

And see, me, I think this is wonderful. I'm wondering how much you're going to like it. Because you're a little less, you're not, you have less tolerance. for trash You get a little more annoyed than just have fun with the stupid shit that's happening You're like, oh, this is kind of a waste of time To be fair, listen, we've literally had conversations

Off the show, it's like, hey, we should tighten the show up a little bit And then like, not even me, it's you guys, me specifically He's like, all right, let's tighten the show up and then like, okay And then if I try to speed it up, it's like, what are you doing? No, it's like, well, I'm trying. I'm also like live editing. I'm going through the questions. I got a lot going out.

No, you're good. I think that'd be funny. The last time I was just more like a like just. I know what you mean. I know what you're saying. I think it'd be funny. But if it's Collins, like whatever, like I think that's, I think that's interesting. We'll do that.

Well, absolutely. Should we do it in a way that like one of us? Should it be, should the Collins be completely fresh for all of us? Or should one of us screen it so we make sure at least we can filter out some of the trash and still get, um, um, yeah. You know what I mean? It probably We have to figure that out So I

We have to filter So the filtering will be It'll be It should be easy to filter That should be Because like basically The way to work It's like

The ones Yeah right This whole thing That's why we got this Was doing it There should be There should be a There should be a

EA version of it Like hey There's an EA question Oh you mean like Some fucked up One Like actually fucked The ones

The ones that have Go behind the pay wall Yeah There should be Some regular ones This is just funny Listen Okay so if

Depending on how many we get, it'll be divided in that way. If they're just completely shit, then of course, I'm just going to delete them. You know what I'm saying? Yeah. Like, we'll figure it out. Someone calls it in a station I would say the whole time. It's like, but we can't answer this. I'll show it to you guys.

Like, it's so funny. Yeah. No, that'll be fun. That would be good. It's a good idea. And yeah, it'll be better. Like, yeah, that's great. I think it'd be funny because I think if like, I think if we went on the stabby's

Stavi's Club Stavi's World I think we'd all mesh well with him He'd be like oh he'd think he'd think he's funny We'd have a good time on a podcast Yeah I'd love to be on that I would uh You know I would love to have on this podcast

Uh Probably when's the last time we talked to John Trond Oh my God years Yeah I was married with kids You know what I mean In Maine or something like that He's in some weird fucking territory That's not real

It's like a fake state The uh the distance to me is the only issue Like somebody being married with kids It's like well all these people on podcasts have families and shit. Not really. Yeah, they do. No, they're estranged.

That's why they're on the podcast. They're not sired. They're not sired to each other. They, they, they, they, they, they're, they, they, they, they're, they, they, they, they, they're, they, they're, they have multiple, you know what I'm saying? Like, it has no parent. Well, Joe Rogan doesn't. What do you mean? He does.

I mean, doesn't? Okay. He's always sitting in that room. He never leaves. He just sits in a room. He never leaves. He turns like, he just, he just, he's just at the mother ship all the time. we're doing the show.

That's it, yeah. That'd be funny if his family left him. It wouldn't surprise me, actually. I think it's, I feel like it's, I feel like there's no way he did this show. I want to hear from his daughters. Like, I'm sure they fucking hate his guys. Aren't they, aren't they like little? Not anymore.

Really? They were little. They were little, like a decade ago. Yeah, they're 48 now. I think they were little. They were little. They were little. A long time ago.

He only had one young one, I think you might have one young. He might have a fetus now. He probably has like a young teenager, the youngest one. Hello, hello. I'm Malcolm Gladwell, host of Smart. Start talks with IBM. I recently spoke with IBM's new director of research, Jake Mbeta. We discussed his vision for the future of quantum computing. At IBM research, what we always do is answer what is the future of computing, whether

it's coming up with new algorithms, coming up with better AI, coming up with quantum, or coming up with just how do different accelerators go together. It's our DNA to answer the question of what is the future. Isn't it a perfect problem for IBM because you kind of need to have a legacy of building stuff? Yes. Building actual physical machines. Yeah, it's why I came to IBM. I wanted the experience, the culture of building hard things that others have not done before.

Where do you imagine we are in the timeline of this technology? There will come a point when it will mature. Right? Yeah. My cell phone is a mature technology at this point. How far are we from that point with Quantum? By 2029, we'll build the first fault-tolerant quantum computer. That is one that can run a very, very large, large problem.

To learn how IBM is building the future of computing, visit IBM.com slash quantum. Hey, it's Ryan Seacrest for Albertsons and Safeway. Ready to save, it's time for cyber deals. Put a spring in your step with fresh savings that brighten the season. These exclusive week-long digital offers on your favorite products are only available when you shop online. Save on eligible items from Kettle, Chabani, Quaker, Skippy, Hidden Valley, International Delight, Frito Lay, and Signature Select. Available now through March 24th on pickup or delivery orders only.

Restrictions apply. See website for full terms and conditions. Really? Yeah. Yeah, dude, he's had, like, daughters for fucking a very long. Dude, I used to be a fan of the guy. Oh, I thought his kids were, like, fairly, yeah. young.

He's not a young guy and he had a kid during fear factor and she was born 28 years old. That's true. It was a medical or not that was a part of the fear factor

It was like it was the fear part It was the trauma The fear of the factor part It was the it was the factor It was the fear He was afraid for the life of his wife That was the fear She was giving birth to a 28 year old

Full person That's true I forgot that that was a real thing that happened. Yeah, me too. So the daughter was the fact that led to the fear, right? Yeah.

Sure. The daughter was the fact of the fact. Yeah, whatever you're saying, yeah. Fear than fact. We're going to get this last one just because I saw this and I wanted to address it. Young Colin eating bullets. The Colin hate is so fucking hilarious.

He says, hey, you fucks. I just wanted to put this here to clarify. I don't actually hate Colin. I did this as a bit for when Chris asked us to change our name to Collins. So I did, but I combined it with my old name of Younger Sheldon. But instead, I made it so, Keep it going, man.

He's over explaining it, I think. Oh, he did it because I said Chris's, because Chris said Colin was teetering over the edge for years. TLDR, I don't have it. I have no hate for him. Yeah, it doesn't matter. You can have hate him.

I like them. I like them more thinking that you hate it, as long as you still pay us. As long as you still pay us, it's fine to hate Colin. It's fine to do whatever you need. It's fine to hate me. Do you hate me and want to give me money? Like, go ahead.

That's actually true. You know, I really could. I love getting super chats from people that are talking shit. I'm like, thanks. Very weird. I love the fuck you pay me type mentality. It's so nuts. I would not pay someone that I despised.

I would in fact take money out of their pocket. I would try. I would never under no circumstances. I would be fun to areas where they live. I would purposely fuck up their schools. I would endanger schools. I would create potholes on their streets. That's crazy with my bare hands.

dude like six hits my hands have to heal and I'm right back at it it's like donkey Kong literally yeah yeah yeah he would he would he would destroy property values oh my god you're shocking oh yeah like in low income neighborhoods for sure yeah absolutely they put them in Chicago and he's like I want a remake of a reboot of street sharks street sharks because that was like the show up with the sharks on the street yeah I mean, yeah, actually. The other mutant sharks that were on surf on the streets, they would... Dissue in the street and they surf through it.

Millions of dollars of property damaged. Every episode. Every episode. I don't know anything about it. It's so stupid. I love that show. How do they see when they're in the street? There is absolutely no sense, making no sense of that show at all.

If they're swimming through concrete, that means they're so strong, it's hilarious. It's hilarious. That means of that strong. Literally there's at their dude the asphalt is like water to them. Like imagine That's crazy. That is so fucking outrageous. That is such an

absurdly strong physical form. All right well Yeah We're gonna read our $25 and up patrons now Look at that right Let's do it. An hour 46 We're not gonna we're not gonna bog you down

Street sharks versus With these fucking Every complaining all the time These episodes are too long I hate myself I hate myself My dad's sick I need help

I peeled my pee pee back I don't know what my daughter is My daughter got lost Can you help me Kingston My daughter's lost No My daughter's lost Help my daughter's lost

So what Go find her My daughter's lost My daughter has been stolen My daughter's lost What do you mean you lost a baby Go find it I love that fucking me

So many of our audience keeps losing their dollars. It's weird. Anyway, a Stark Tank podcast, remember a patron.com says to Star Tank. $25 enough patrons are getting their name read at the end of the show now. We're going to read whatever your names are. So to get your

name read and make me say hay and a shit, jump on over there. Early access, ad-free, merch, snarktank.com, dot shop. You know what it is. Don't make me hurt you, I guess. What do you mean? You lost a baby. Cobeba. Go fine. Oh, I read, sorry.

Count me down. Three, two, one. in English. Cobeba, as an Irish man, your accents hurt my soul. That's crazy for an eye. Oh, when we did the I, the I, Ireland, we did the Irish accent

last episode. Cacres. Jackers. Yeah, I mean, listen. What are you doing in my Ireland? If you're expecting us to have good Irish accents, you know, like, you should, you should, basically your reaction have been like, oh yeah, this is as shitty as I would have

expected it to be. Get me a bottle of beer. Like your soul being hurt, it would imply that you thought we were going to kill it. And it was so bad. You're like, what happened? I thought these guys were going to have the best. What happened to all of our potatoes? Which happened to my accent was going to be good. What happened to my Irish accent? Let me go follow my rainbow to my pot of gold and then do a jig on a fucking my wife's head. After I drink alcohol for three hours. The only the only context for it, and I mean, I'm not even exaggerating. The only context that I have for an Irish accent, like a real Irish accent, as far as I know, anyway, is

Biocococ, the Atlas guy on the radio. Oh. Would you coinly do this? Connor McGregor. Conner McGregor. Conor McGregor. Conor McGregor. 50 Gies, baby. What are you doing?

That's so... Keep going to Scottish. I can't help it. It's more... Great. Great. The T's not there. Yeah. Great. Great.

Great. What are you doing? What are you doing? What the hell? Gingson's looking at pornography. Hard R's sound is on. Sorry. Look at...

Hoity tooty. Look at this hoity-toity black. Look at me. I'm Liam Neeson. I am Irish and I like to beat blacks. He's Irish? I was pretty good impression. I thought he was City Gear.

I'm pretty sure he's Irish. I'm pretty sure Liam Neeson. I guess, I don't know. I'm pretty sure Liam Neeson is Nisish. Yeah, he's. He's niches. Yeah, that's it. I think you remember that story where he was like,

I wanted to beat the block so bad. You don't remember that? I'd beat that black up so bad. I thought he was Scotsman. I don't know. I wanted to beat that black until he was blue. Let me make sure he's. I'm pretty sure he's Irish.

He was not that, Yeah, North Irish actor. Liam Niesin is Irish. I keep saying, for whatever reason, this clip of The Simpsons keeps showing up on my timeline of Homer Simpson of a... Flanders, like, tackling Homer out of a burning window. Oh, yeah. And he'd love that. I love that scene.

But the fucking... That sound is iconic. It's so good. And the fuck like T poses into the window So good It's fucking insane

I don't know why I keep seeing it Like every day I've seen this From a different person That's weird Yeah That's interesting And Flanders upstairs

Like Okay Yeah It does a flip It's back Back flip into the window Yeah It's fucking stupid

Yeah Anyway As an Irish As an Irishman I apologize I'm going to beat up the blocks I'm from taking It a beat up the blacks

It's me Taken. My name is... My name is Taken. My name is Quigon Taken. My name is Richard Taken. Richard Taken. I'm quite... Dick Taken.

I'm going to get... Dick Taken. I'm going to get my daughter back with my fucking lightsaber. I need to get my daughter back from this. Where's my daughter, you Albanian bitch? You ever see Taken? Of course. I've never seen it.

I saw Tootid, yeah. He just took... Took did? I think he's just like killing Albanian people. I know he was like, listen to me. I will find you. I have a gun and I will shoot you. And I have a very particular set of guns.

And I will shoot you. with these guns that I have. How come it can't be like, so the kidnapping happens in France, right? Why can't it be French people? It's fucking Albanians, you know? Like, it's Albanians in France. And I'm like, why can't it,

why does it have to be like the, that's their territory. That's where they feed. Yeah. But you know, like say what, like Western Europe proper, like why can't they be the bad guys? You know, like say Americans aren't using the bad. You know, like what that?

It has to be like, oh, these scumbaggues, they have to be the Albanians. Yeah, it's like that. It's so fun. What are dirty, you dirty Albanians. You guys are sick. I know a lot of you are Muslim. Discuss me.

Really? They're very Muslim? Well, I thought they were very Christian. There's a lot of, there's a lot of, I think, I don't know if Albanians are considered Slavs. I don't know, but there's a lot of, there's like a big. They're from, they're from, it was called that. Hello, hello. I'm Malcolm Gladwell, host of Smart Talks with IBM.

I recently spoke with IBM's new director of research, Jake Gambata. We discussed his vision for the future. of quantum computing. At IBM research, what we always do is answer what is the future of computing, whether it's coming up with new algorithms, coming up with better AI, coming up with quantum, or coming up with just how do different accelerators go together. It's our DNA to answer the question of what is the future. Isn't it a perfect problem for IBM because you kind of need to have a legacy of building stuff? Yes. Building actual physical machines. Yeah, it's why I, came to IBM. I wanted the experience, the culture of building hard things that others have not done

before. Where do you imagine we are in the timeline of this technology? There will come a point when it will mature. My cell phone is a mature technology at this point. How far are we from that point with Conton? By 2029, we'll build the first Volt-tolerant quantum computer. That is one that can run a very, very large, large problem. To learn how IBM is building the future of computing, visit IBM.com slash quantum. Hey, it's Ryan Sechrest for Albertsons and Safeway. Ready to save, it's time for cyber deals. Put a spring in your step with fresh savings that brighten the season.

These exclusive week-long digital offers on your favorite products are only available when you shop online. Save on eligible items from Kettle, Chabani, Quaker, Skippy, Hidden Valley, International Delight, Frito Lay and Signatures Select. Available now through March 24th on pickup or delivery orders only. Restrictions apply. See website for full terms and conditions. Once upon the time.

Have you seen all the Indian students immigrating into Canada through these like fake schools? They got like this Stanford University. They have like Stanford College and it's like in a strip mall. And it's just like it's a diploma mill basically. No, I don't what the hell? It's fucking crazy. Let me see. Okay, it says here they're not Slavic.

But yeah, there's definitely a big Muslim population of that. But anyway, that's... I don't know. I don't even know. I don't know. I'm going to do with it. There was a lot of them where we grew up. A lot of them grew up.

Where? Back home? What? It's a lot of Albanians back home. I don't even know. I still, to this day, I don't know what the fucking Albanian is. Albanian mafia. You seriously don't?

Wow, that's crazy. Where are they from? Albania? They're from Albany. I don't even know where that is. They're from Albany. I know where that is. It's near, if I'm not missing, he's near,

Albany, New York. That's right, you're right. That's why they call them Albanians there. That's what I thought, I think, probably when I was a kid. He probably, actually, I met, if you heard Albanians, like, what the fuck is there? Who cares? Why do they have, I guess, for, uh, so like Uticans, do they have like, eutigans?

Do they have like? Yeah, I don't know. Well, the Philadelphians. Pittsburghians. Burgians. I don't know. I've spent a lot of time Bostonians.

Boston is a real one. I was like, oh yeah, I'm a Utican. Syracusian. Buffaloans? I think Buffaloan is real. Buffaloan is real.

Buffaloan is. Sacramento. Sacramento. Sacramento. Sacramento. Sacramento. Sacramentonians. That's crazy.

It is insane. It sounds like a cult almost. It does. Like we have to, you have to take the sacrament. No, sacoedonia. Anyway, God. Just God?

Yeah, just capital God. And it's just Hitler with AirPods in. With a fucking fade. That, with the fade. I love that image. Oh, the AirPods and the waves. With the fucking... I think everybody should have waves at some point.

Yeah, I'll do it next time. I'm going to give you a perm. And then we'll cut it short, brush it out. You got some nice waves. Yeah, all right. It's going to be sick as fuck. I would look disgusting with a perm. Do you have AirPods?

No, I've never owned AirPods. Neither have I. I just don't get it. I'm not an earbud person, though, either. I'm a headphone guy. I only have something for a specific reason, but yeah. Yeah. Yeah, headphones all the fucking way.

Anyway, the gooner spider covering up the Iran invasion by exposing moon bears. What the fuck's a moon bear? There's bears on the moon. Type of stupid question is that? Yeah. Maybe that was like a real name. Polar Bear, a bear the dumb, emotionally unstable. That's a bipolar bear.

Oh, you're right, you're right. A singular polar bear is a bear. A bipolar bear is a bear that goes up each pole back and forth throughout the year. It's like, let's get a little warm. So they track, they swim. They swim to like shore and then they make it through the entire. So they never stop because it would probably take fucking half a year to get there. It takes five days.

So they're just the greatest. greatest things ever. Break neck speeds. A lot of it is, they're really fast in the water, particularly. The water makes up the speed, to be fair. And they can cool themselves down, so I don't overheat water in the water. They're only fast when people aren't looking, though. Right.

They're like a reeling angel. Their regular bear speed, their regular bear speed when people are looking. So it's still way faster to human. People are really. What's bear speed? Bear miles per hour? Bear miles per hour. Yeah, regular bear speed is like, what, average bear speed is like, what,

like 3,000 miles per hour? The average bear runs at like, what, 75,000 miles per hour? All right. So it's, the Guter, the Guter is. Spider, nor wigger getting lowballed. My grandma tried to traffic me to St. Lucia at 4. Ethan lobbing suction cup dildos at a little league game and having them stick to their dumb gay helmets.

That's fucking crazy. Racist prim slim calling Sweeney and... Is that a Capriza? Yeah. You're really disrespecting the pouch. Well, you gotta get that last little bit out. That's opposite. Does it make the pot's when you damage it afterwards?

Christ. How is that? I haven't had a Capriason in years. They're very delicious, actually. I bet it's just sugar. Pacific cooler? I'm sure, yeah, I'm sure there's nothing good in here. Just melted candy. I'm sure it's zero percent juice. But I was looking to get something on Amazon and I saw CapriSan. It was like $4. It was like less than $5.

For that one pound? I'm the greatest Hagler. I'm the greatest Hagler. I bet it's just saying this Caprizzan for $10. That's so expensive. I think it was like a meal. A 12er. For less.

You know what to have it. Got a whole meal. I actually, I'm actually, I'm hoping that I have enough time to go to the habit and catch the train on time. We'll see how it plays out. Delta Gamma. Benny Yahoo and the Genocide's TM literally fed this toddler last week. Why is he still crying? Squimp is bugs.

Clamial Squire the 3rd. Republican chicks look like, look, what? Wait, Republican chicks look like they used a makeup shotgun. Some of them absolutely do. Some of them do. I will say that. There's one cosplaying as like a conservative right now and it's really bad. Oh.

Oh, what do you mean? Oh, like somebody doing Republican makeup? She's not like, well, sorry, this is, it's basically, she's wearing some type of she looks, I've said that wrong. She's like, cosplay as a conservative, but wearing like some almost gothy type shit and she looks really bad. Oh, Melanie Mac. That's it.

I can never remember that dumb fucking name. A goth chick with botched makeup. I immediately went Melanie Mac. That's how that's it She's synonymous I don't know why I can remember That's that girl that was on Twitter I was like

F word Yeah yeah yeah yeah It should be easy for me to remember Melanie Mac She's older Yeah she's older Melanie Mac That should be easier

I remember from back in the day Like maybe like 2013 She was a gaming person She did something That's so crazy I don't know I have to look up a video About her

Like somebody I'm sure like Oh Melanie Mac sucks You know Yeah I don't know maybe Let's see Oh Melanie Mac Expose I bet If I put that

Oh yeah I bet I bet You know she bashed a dong into a fucking open fan. Didn't she kill a pet? Didn't she kill a pet? No, no, no, that was a... That was... I don't know.

Two minutes. I was going to say that was Mac Melanie. What are you saying? There's two minute video. What happened to Melanie and Mac? She fell. Melody Mac is quitting the chudslop grip. Oh, Zanderhol. I forgot about this guy. Oh, yeah.

Oh, yeah. You serve a guildmaster. Snarktank's hung. trans girl now with tits. Colin Moriarty, J.C. Denton, killing Aaron Lewis saying that's a stain. It looks so fun. Like, it's so inauthentic. I'm like, she's like a wax figure of her dead

self. Like, you don't do this. It looks so phoned in. It's not even like passionate the right way. Yeah, yeah. It's like I see like she's got to try hard. That's exactly what it is. But also empty, but also empty. What? Yeah, it's empty. It's empty. Yeah, it's empty. She's an empty person.

He quit. Melanie MacGooner Gate Adventure when grifting goes wrong. What the fuck is this? I don't know anything. And it's that one guy that, uh, he, uh, oh, sticks, right? No, no, no, um, rage, uh, rage a hollick. Oh, yeah, I get them mixed up all the time. They look the same and they're both stupid and dumb and lame and gay and pieces of shit. That sticks guy. But, uh, yeah, yeah, the rage a hollick, right? Yeah. Rage hawk. Uh, razor fist or rage a hawks. That's right. That's what it is. He's like, he's like 52.

Something. And he still dresses like somebody who would get shot in Beavis and Butthead. I told you that he Oh my God I think someone Might have sent me The video Where I explained on this podcast

That the Razor Fist Looked like this guy That I saw on EFucked That was wearing Yeah, that's right Yeah It was fucking the cake I think somebody sent it to me

But I don't remember It's definitely him It's clearly a razor Fib There's a guy I think there's no I think there's actually There's no shadow of doubt Yeah

That is Razor Fiss Fucking that cake In that video There's these videos of this guy That he goes He buys sandwiches from He buys like burgers From places and fucks him

Oh that's me though I do that Oh That's my second channel Chris fucks burgers That's That channel would blow It would blow up

It would fuck with a cue Remember that nigga That fuck the McChicken On that Twitter that went viral Yeah Classic classic That was classic Because I was like

That's rough man That ain't some smooth fucking No it's fucking He had the mayo It's like breading The breading Oh he didn't have the mayo But still

At least fuck a burger that's all greasy and shit. Even if you put mayo all over a breaded pussy, it probably still feels pretty bad. It probably doesn't fit. I'm I would fuck some Wendy's chili. While it's really hot. Would you say Wendy's Chili? Yeah. So like Chili's and Wendy's? They make chilies and Wendy's? You've never had the chili of Wendy's? They

no. It's actually not that bad. I think I don't really like chili. I would go as far as it's the best thing from Wendy's actually. I bet it probably tastes like shit now. Because I haven't had it since I was like in high school. Chili never appealed to me because it just looked gross. It's a gross looking thing. And I think it just, it feels like I'll eat this when I can't eat anymore.

Like, I'll eat this when my teeth aren't around. I love chili. A nice chili dog, do a chili cheese dog could be wonderful. Oh, you're a bitch. We talk about it. Hello, hello, I'm Malcolm Gladwell, host of the podcast Smart Talks with IBM. I recently sat down with IBM's chairman and CEO, Arvin Krishna. And I asked him, how can companies use AI to its fullest potential to create smarter business?

My one advice to them, pick areas you can scale. Don't pick the shiny little toys on the side. For example. If anybody has more than 10% of what they had for customer service 10 years ago, they're already five years behind it. If anybody is not using AI to make their developers who write software 30% more productive today with the goal of being. 70% more productive. Yeah. Wow. So we are not asking our clients to be the first experiment on it.

We say, you can leverage what we did. We're happy to bring out all our learnings, including what needs to change in the process, because the biggest change is not technology, is getting people to accept that there's a different way to do things. To listen to the full conversation, visit IBM.com slash smart talks. Hey, it's Ryan Seacrest for Albertsons and Safeway. Ready to save, it's time for cyber deals. Put a spring in your step with fresh savings that brighten the season. These exclusive week-long digital offers on your favorite products are only available when you shop online.

Save on eligible items from Kettle, Chabani, Quaker, Skippy, Hidden Valley, International Delight, and Signature Select. Available now through March 24th on pickup or delivery orders only. Restrictions apply. See website for full terms and conditions. I feel like chili, but you don't like that would be the only circumstance where I would have Chili is on a Chili's on. I love some sourcrout, a little bit of mustard. Fucking white. That's New York.

That's New York hot dogs, bro. Yeah, that's like sourcrow. Sourcrout? New York white. Yes, of course. That's crazy, dude. Of course. That is New York white.

That's sour, some sourcrout, some mustard. It's literally German. This is Nazi-esque. He is actually, now that I'm looking at him in this light, I actually see, when he speaks, I can hear, nice, I'm fighting. Exactly. I hear it. Some sourcrow.

You hear that? Some fucking mustard. Some jalapinos on their. do. I fucking love it. I can hear Crystal Knotch happening as he's speaking. Y'all are crazy. A New York dog has crowd on it, bro. Sourkraut is just, no. I'm not a

fermented cabbage. Get the fuck out of here. I like sourcrow, man. Get the fuck out of here. I don't know from my grandma. I'm not putting fermented cabbage on my hot. What about sweet trout? You don't, I'm not even saying that like I like sourcrow as like because I just, to me, a dog is simple. Just keep it simple. Yeah. Keep it fucking simple, dude. I literally just have a hot dog with mustard.

Hot dog with mustard is perfectly fine. Maybe bacon wrapped if I'm out at a bar lake or something. A bacon wrapped dog is chef's kiss, but a dog with a little bit of mustard. Perfect. Preference is jalapeno, sourcrow mustard. It's like pepperoni pizza to me where it's like this is fine. You don't need like for me pizza. Stop adding extra.

For me pizza, if I'm getting pizza, my choice is if I don't know the place, I'm always going to get a plain size. So what? But why do you disrespect the dog though? You just don't respect the dog. I think I don't, I like hot dogs a decent amount. and if I'm gonna get them I like I like some crowd I would really like a hot dog right now

I'm sorry man I'm sorry man I'm also raised by an old person that's why she probably like sourcrow and that's where I get it from because I don't know with it my god Shake Shack has an okay dog Every time I go to Shake Shack

I have like a really bad experience I'm like a really bad You gotta break the curse I don't know I'm scared because every like I think I went there once and then like all the fucking all the screens were broken You didn't mention that

And then I was like this sucks and then I remember once I got the chicken bites there because I kind of like the way they taste. They're pretty good. And then it was fucking wet. They were wet. They were super greasy, bro. No, but like, oh, they were. Oh, they were. It was like, no, it was like on the inside, like, under the breading, they were like slimy. And I was like, this is, I'm going to die. Huh. Clearly. And then like the most recent time I went and the screens were broken again. And so I'm just like, man, I just went there for a lemonade. I've never had a problem. That's so crazy.

Same. I don't know. I was going to get raw. You're going to give me your fucking wallet. I'm going to get beheaded and staple to a horse and then paraded around town. They film an ISIS video. They film an ISIS video. In Shake Shias. Shake Shises.

That's what they call it. I don't even know that was a thing. Oh my fucking God. This is no shake shises. What did you? I'm so fucking angry. Isis still doing shit? So token battle had be, what you call?

They're sending out the fucking interviews for the preview, the betas for token battle I didn't even know that was happening yet I didn't hear any word of it I would have fucking had like six accounts do it but yeah

they're doing like a marathon playtests this month and I didn't get invited bummer that's crazy I'm gonna ask somebody you're like the bungee guy yeah

I was also like the champion of that game man I like that game a lot so there's like oh I don't you probably said one negative thing I'm authentically excited to play it which is like annoying

it's like yeah now you got a shit on it. Throw me, yeah, fuck you guys. It actually sucked. I didn't have fun at all. This game, don't play. Don't buy it. Bring back Sweeto Vision. Daltono. I'm

going to cover them with a mortar. Everyone has Uno dipshit. It came free with your fucking Xbox. Great, classic. I missed that game. It was a good game, actually. Oh, yeah. So, yeah. Well, we didn't have, back then we didn't have them.

That was more of a newer thing. Or, well, you know, new. 2009. Sweeney monologues to himself in the shower Two rats in a trench coat Are those fake rice Krispie cheese? That's a real one. Rice Krispie treats are great

It's I want you to I'm going to bring the fake one You should and show it I want you to try Because it's not this Because this is wonderful Well that would make RFK scream

It would You think about it You'd be like I didn't shoot me in the face It'd be soft No don't do it Don't do it I'll kill you I hear all those people are resigning and shit

Oh yeah that's right Yeah Yeah What a surprise The fact that he got that job is so crazy It is It's comedy That is

I think that is Ray Charles is a bus driver Seriously It really is that comfortable He's a fucking former meth head Or just crazy I love that My grades

My grades got better When I started using math Hold on a second I gotta put my drugs So I can get stronger Hold on This nigga Shubbs shoves all these needles in him

and you know it ain't prescribed by a real doctor He looks like fucking eraser head In the morning He's so many goddamn needles to get into it. He's in great shape. He's a really fucking in great shape. He's a really In great shape of him. I've injected horse tears into my fucking tear knocks and now I can cry for real.

He's so steroid-packed. It's hilarious. There's pure comedy. There's a worm swimming in my testicles. I can feel it. I can feel it. I can feel it. I can feel it. It's funny.

I can only come if he goes. Counterclaw, like, here he goes. Here he goes. He goes. He's married to the girl from what you call it. Yeah. And it's like,

that's, it's just. That's so funny. It doesn't see real to me, man. If you just verbalize that shit, you have plastic surgery, the fuck up and then married a fucking mutant. Sam Porter bitches,

two rats in a trench coat. I go to foam fights to hit children legally. Nice. Reckless Rhino. The Sloker 2, why so derpy? Hey, Siri, how do I build a bomb? Kingston's extra chromosome. Update.

I fed my Chris Hansen Tamagachi. Gonna make this soldier baby bite the digital curb. The goon moon. Capcom Japan really said, no, no. Him not Miku Tyson. Him Michael Bison. Totally different character. Totory different.

He wrote this out. Totally different. Crazy. Was that in court? Oh, God. Yeah, it was in court. Mike Bison. Mike Bicester.

King assurper's arched nemesis, Queen Pussy Gweaver. Derek Natchelvin is instant and hashtag for him. Derek, Round-eyed Asian, losing layers of skin after touching Cali tap water, a.k. Pure Newsom piss.

I slipped the T-Virus in her drink. She ain't even know it. That's crazy. And yet it's Staying there walking intently So Hold on Is this still Rick Ross?

Yeah How did he get the T-virus Is what I want to know I bought it from a guy She didn't even know I don't even know I feel like getting the T-virus In the world

The T-virus is real It was really not hard anymore He was like once upon the time It was hard Now it's just not hard He was trying to get He was trying to get testosterone supplements But he actually got

You got the T-virus Instead There's a T-virus is the G virus. There's a bunch of viruses. There's a C. Season 6 where the zombies come back. That was pretty cool.

Oh, yeah. Six is the lamest one, though. It's the lamest one, but the Leon part is actually fun as shit. It's a... I keep hearing that, yeah. I really like that because it also... I love the meter where you can kick the shit out of people.

You have like these little things and you can build up. Yeah. And you just, you kick the fuck out of people. And I'm like, let's go. Little key. And shoot zombies in the penis and stuff. Bro, it was fun. I had a lot of fun playing six.

Everything was cool by the other than the fucking West. Parts you're supposed to run away and I'm just trying to fuck everyone up. Well, you can't kill. There's some parts. Most of that interactions you can't kill your way out of. You actually have to leave. Sometimes there's way too many, but I'm going to try. I'm going to try to fuck all these zombies.

And Chris Redfield's part is just Army of Two literally. And then, what's we call it? Very underwhelming. But it is funny though. And then there's a fucking there's a, his name is Jack Westcoe, whatever this fucking name is. I couldn't do that. fucking kung fu bullshit

that shit doesn't know I was like I was like that's just so you're just doing I hated it I didn't even finish this part I don't know

especially because most of it like it's like oh I know you've seen it all if you've done you know it all converges it's whatever I really really really

love asking Grock is this true after someone wishes me a happy birthday no is it really a happy birthday Grock no is this true

Underware underwear boner double pack brandy Have you seen the 15-year-olds they're putting out today, though? Is a wild tweet. I have seen that. Who tweeted that? I think Destiny tweeted that.

So there's just like a laundry list of crap he's probably been into. You could never. So I haven't looked into how much creepy stuff there is. But if he's keeping the pictures. That's a weird thing to say. Yeah. It's a very weird thing to say. Hello, hello.

I'm Malcolm Gladwell, host of the podcast, Smart Talks with IBM. I recently sat down with IBM's chairman and CEO, Arvin Krishna. And I asked him, how can companies use AI to its fullest potential to create smarter business? My one advice to them, pick areas you can scale. Don't pick the shiny little toys on the side. For example. If anybody has more than 10% of what they had for customer service,

10 years ago, they're already five years behind. If anybody is not using AI to make their developers who write software 30% more productive today, with the goal of being 70% more productive, so we are not asking our clients to be the first experiment on it. We say, you can leverage what we did. We're happy to bring out all our learnings, including what needs to change in the process,

because the biggest change is not technology. is getting people to accept that there's a different way to do things. To listen to the full conversation, visit IBM.com slash smart talks. Hey, it's Ryan Seacrest for Albertsons and Safeway. Ready to save, it's time for cyber deals. Put a spring in your step with fresh savings that brighten the season. These exclusive week-long digital offers on your favorite products are only available when you shop online.

Save on eligible items from Kettle, Chabani, Quaker, Skippy, Hidden Valley, international delight, Frito Lay, and Signature Select. Available now through March 24th on pickup or delivery orders only. Restrictions apply. See website for full terms and conditions. Can you remember being like 21 and being confused by people? Because I'm like, why the fuck do you look like that? You're like they're 14 or something or they're 15 and they're in a fucking club and they're like done up.

And you're just like, why the fuck? Oh, like the makeup trend of them like appearing. Yeah, and they make them look older. It's like that's kind of crazy. I remember when I think it might have been Jojo C. or something when she was like, I don't know if she's still a minor or not. I have no fucking clue.

I just remember a lot of people were very upset that she was appearing more. They were accusing her. I remember that's how I, because I was like, who the fuck is this person? And they were accusing her of like making young girls want to appear more,

not feminine, I guess. What's the word I'm looking for? I don't know what you mean. But you know what I mean. And I don't know if that was her, but they blame you. her. I mean, in America, we elected a president who constantly funded

literally little girl fucking president. It's a weird thing to work. I've definitely seen people who are just like, I've, dude, it is weird the way that they do their makeup sometimes. Yeah. It's just like, what the fuck are you doing? It's very weird. It's, Destiny's just not being self-aware of how fucking insane that is to tweet out.

Yeah, it's a crazy thing to say. It's like, dude, especially given your situation. Yeah. I can't even imagine, dude, it's one of those things where I can't even imagine what, unfortunately, that's, I felt, like I said, I feel, I feel like, you know, you talked about Ethan last time, I feel like he's getting kind of a pass because I just feel like, I just, I don't know, I always feel like when there's smoke this fire, I'm be honest. Yeah. And that's the thing, but people don't seem to be too bothered by it. And I'm just like, yeah, that's what we live

in, no. I just kind of accept it. Yeah, a Batman Superman Fusion couldn't get that out of me. I don't know what you, I don't know what that means. Couldn't get that information. I know what you. I couldn't beat that information out of me. I see. Never. I guess. possible. Blonde blue-eyed German man cosplaying Swin. Monoco

watching a Tarantino marathon and having 15 orgasms. Nice. Four inches soft, two

inches hard. Nick or treat by Nick Erlodian. Ridgillah Evolved versus Cyber Elon Muskulon. Gtta4

Swingset Glitch. Are we still talking about EDP 445? When? I thought about him actually yesterday. Are we still

talking about EDP? That's funny. I like that. That's the context, right? It took a second. I think so. Are we still talking about this guy?

He wanted a cupcake so long ago, and it was totally fine. He's just a stand-up guy looking for food. Look at how big he is. It checks out. The law is crazy, bro. You're dead to rights, and you didn't see any time. I just know nothing. I don't understand.

It's a weird system that we got. It really is. I watched a video last night real quick of a guy beat up three pedophiles. Like, He went on the registry. You found out later he was abused, so he felt like he was just avenging kids that were harmed. Sure, yeah. So, um...

Hey, man. All of those guys combined, like, got like, like, maybe, like, six years or something. Combined, like, all those three guys for what the offenses. So they each got... The guy that beat up those guys... Got more. Didn't even kill them. He got 25 years.

That's ridiculous. He got 25 years. They got a sentence that wasn't even as old as the kids that they would fuck. Like, the guy even said, he's like, I'll... take a plea deal and I'll do the time of the amount of time they've all served together. And then they're like, no. And he got like 25 years. Now, to be fair, I'm sure since he was an offender, he's been in jail multiple times, it made the sentence worse because that's how it works. But still, even so, like, what? He didn't even kill any of them. And people would have

cared. Right. Dude, people in the prison, they were like, oh, this guy's- There would have been like a go-fund me for his bail probably. Dude, the COs and the prisoners were like, this guy's a fucking hero. He's like, he's a vigilante beating a perverts. Hit one with a hammer and shit. That's crazy. And I was like, nobody fell back. He hit him with a hammer.

It was a crazy story. And I felt really bad because it was, of course, he's a kid. And my stepdad's molested me. And the mom's like, I'm, you're crazy. I don't believe you. Like, sick. That's the craziest shit ever. Imagine having a mom.

Your child comes to you. It's like, hey, I'm being abused. Shut the fuck up. Like, what? That is so outrageous. Is that good? That dude stinks that good? The stepdaddy is like, I hate losing this dude.

It's so good. He gave it to the kid too. That's insane. CJ being monitoring the MGS3 remake, not even 12 hours after official release. My shit shrinks when I get aroused. What did Chris think of my friendly neighborhood? My name is Chris and I approve this message.

Big Meaty stinks. The moon's frequencies tell me to kill Kingston. Oh, man. Dick so long it gave her a vertical suplex. gay actor Rosebud delicious Nice Did you guys

There was an episode Of like flavor of love And the A girl was like Yeah I was pregnant with twins And I had an abortion And he was like Damn double homicide

And I'm like What though Sorry I can't I had a burrito Kingston Doesn't like Crushing for him Anti-Semitism

Look Bag Heath paying More for concessions Than 40X tickets Gids The Little Cesar's Is good When you don't have

A dumb gay bitch You're telling you It sucks All right What the fuck No, do you have, no, I have no, there's no excuse. You have to be, I would have to be so, so drunk, it's insane. I have to be really poor.

We would have to be so poor and drunk. Both, both. I want to be poor drunk and in Vegas. If I'm drunk. Where pizza is like $10 a slice. But I'm just like, there's no excuse to not get Domino's. You know what I mean? Like that's the standard party pizza now.

Yeah. I'd rather get branded. And it's only a few dollars more. Domino's has risen He hath risen Yeah It's not dude It's not bad

And if you're gonna do party pizza I don't hate Pets I don't hate Domino's at all Really that shit would you do Little Caesars Yeah No more No

How much is Like how much Could you possibly be saving Yeah Not much Dude literally not much Because like if you If you buy multiple

pizzas in bulk They have deals So like you're buying them at around Like maybe $7 a pie And so Dominoes is like I mean, sorry, a little Caesar's probably like five in change or maybe $6 or something. It's not that big of a difference.

Ridiculous. Get Domino's. Come on. Yeah. This is DJ spit. Or just cook, I guess. I guess you can. Ye who come spew with ropes, Krispy Kobe coming back like Darth Vader.

Obama, when he met Michelle, be like, let me be queer. Come stop. You're crying. It will be all right. Just take my ass hold on tight. I will predate your come all around you. Like Kobe's back? But he's like Darth Vader?

I'd feel a lot better He has a thing He has a respirator on his finger He has a finger respirator Instead of one of his throat Because his figure's been broken 3,000 times I would be okay with it

He plays again in the league Because they let him too Unfair He doesn't have to breathe He's in limited energy He just never gets tired He doesn't have to get tired anymore He forced chokes fucking LeBron

Yes Kings has been going genuinely irritating to listen to you, please fire him now you're fired It's crazy All right, see you man See you later Jesus Jesus I'm not reading this

Don't say that about Kingston Don't say that Thank you friend I wonder That was written I'm not saying I don't know you didn't say that Yeah yeah yeah

I don't want you to I don't want you to misunderstand What are you saying? Oh sorry I'm retardedly talking out loud of myself I see We're trying to order the habitat of humanity I'm trying to see

Yeah Yeah, that's it. No, I'm trying to see if I is, I'm like, oh, can I, because I really want that lunch at the habit. Yeah. But like, I don't know if I have enough time to wait for it. So I'm like, oh, can I order it and grab it and just go? Because if I can just pick it up, I'll have plenty of time. You're probably good.

Yeah. Sween, you do be looking like one of those blacks. Whoa. Interesting. That's what it says. Cargo pants, no car goes beat. I hate this fucking joke. This joke makes me so.

Man cargo pants no cargoes beep Your head's all Retar to get it fixed Cardboard pie I came in his gay ass so hard That I made Mpregg real Your next boy's niggly ziggly Transferring my key to Trump's disease

Like it's Goku powering up a spare bomb Ethan Cloin Yeah the Cloin A fucking clown movie remember I love that movie A girl nuzzled her foot on my crotch and I came instantly How do I fix that? I can't help you Crazy.

Let's go. That is so wild. That's amazing. That's a real thing for people. Not is it? That they could just like, it's just a bust immediately like that? Yeah.

You know, sometimes I give up. Like, genuinely. Like, sometimes I'll be cranking it. I'm like, I give up. You know what I thought about that? Just to try to make sense of it because I don't know. So, like, theorizing.

Maybe it's the people, the difference is the people who like really cranked their hog back in the day and got dissent to, ties versus the people that really didn't. Because I feel like that's all it takes. It's like, oh, even if you start having sex for the first time, you might bust fairly quickly. And then as you start having sex regularly, it doesn't happen like that anymore.

Yeah. Like, so I'm just theorizing maybe. Probably. I knew somebody who didn't fucking beat their meat until into like mid high school. And I was like, you're a fucking saint. How did you do that? I don't even like. I was like 14, 15.

No, 13, 14, 14 when I started doing that. Probably. Nick, I was definitely in middle school. Oh, nah, middle school, I wasn't, I wasn't, I just, you guys. I just, I just wasn't like. I think I had the hormones in my. I was like maybe like 11 or something. That shot me, got me quicker.

Roach porn. Holy shit, Helldivers 2 and ALOD-S-C collab. Total clanker, death, tin skins, go back to O-Srig, goon, devil, the man without come. I have no balls, and I must peace, search, Peter, Lori, Fish Battle. Kevin Bacon, shooting my dad to death at a Lakers game before flossinging and yelling, you got baconed. Sucking until red, sucking until red comes out. Oh, yo. Smitchie the kid, Adam ruins everything versus Sheldon Cooper.

Nay, Giger. Would you rather... I'm sorry. Would you rather shit out of dick or dick out of shit? My new D&D weapon plus four bludgeoning hamster and a sock. Fagliacci, the gay clown. Ush Omni penis. He read my anti-straight equation dark side.

He's gay. Anti-straight equation. Shut the fuck up. Craig the Canadian. Sorry, Miss Jackson. I am four eels. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. I hate how stupid that is.

Oh, my God. It's your boy, Sean ED, cumshot gaming hereditary is deep in the same way that Derek is an intellectual. Damn. Well, I mean... I mean, I agree with that. I don't think, like,

I've never once claimed that I'm some fucking intellectual. I think I'm on the level. Derek graduated from Stanford University, the Stanford University that is in the strip mall in Toronto. Right. No, like, yeah. See, that's the thing. Niggas, they gotta go to one dollar a hundred.

I've studied pussyology. People, you think you're some sort of intellectual? No, I never claimed that ever once. Young Colin injecting himself with gallium to become Mega Man. Nice. I woke up in the morning, a hard like morning wood in the morning. Sween working the streets selling inward pads to pay for Lily's crippling piss addiction. There's a cult that's helping a lobster molt from its shell to see how big they can get it, for real.

A bowl of nails for breakfast. breakfast without any milk. It's pretty... Without any milk. I suck three dicks. Without any milk. It's like, what the fuck? You're pretty good, man. You go inside the Falcus-M-H.

Drip M.H. being subjected to Sweene's dog shit attack on Titans takes. That's crazy. The show still sucks, though. Chris, have you heard the new Beatles album? I really like it. Also, I'm gay. What do you mean? Oh, Beths. I'm stupid. I was like, this is a new Beatles album? I was like, what happened?

Aren't most of them gone? I think there's like, what, two of them left? I think it's Paul and Ringo. Oh, Reno, yeah, Ringo. Ringo. Ringo. Paul McCartney and Ringo, I think are. Paul McCartney and Ringo Beatles.

Actually, what if, no, what if Ringo is the last name? Ringo beetle? Yeah, Ringo Star Beetle. Oh, star. No, the best. I haven't heard it yet, but yeah, I'll definitely listen to it. I like the best. Okay, so trains at two.

Yeah, okay. Obie won't you blow me So I gaped So gap they call him Slipping Jimmy Jeffrey Epstein you say Um Fucking my iPhone

With my perfectly USBC sized micropinus Kremlin to Gremlin Ask the hungus Transgirl with Tits to call me Um Fable 4 hype is dead for me now Harry wrecked him I got a feeling that tonight's gonna be a gay night

Sween humor be like What if instead of I'm a punk rocker yes I am He said I'm a gay inward yes I am I said that I know Yeah I'm sure you did You know me so well, dude

You gotta have dinner one day Go ahead and like some lunch So you could just predict everything He's gonna say to you Woh-hoo! Wage Slate 580s the dachshurge the dastardly dog Bashing Eustace's head in with a ladle

While Muriel silently cheers Pippini Bros presents Crash Course Cybertron History Rise of Decepticons, Donk Dawkinson, the colon-swinging slasher Mason metalhead mockery of Megger Death Pee if you two If you two of

you were balls and one was a shaft who would be what your answer will have real world consequences that's insane I mean just I mean Kingsen would be the shaft obviously yeah it would make a lot more sense yeah yeah I guess

we have you a big balls that's yeah one big ball one big ball one big balls and a very unimpressive penis yeah huge ball but one massive ball

anyway balls balls balls we We eat ball Taken We eat the meat Because the meat

Had a soul We take the lives Because to hurt Makes us whole Dang that kind of goes hard Yeah if you're fucking That goes hard If you're a vegan

And you're fucking gay Yeah it sounds like The vegan Bob Dylan or something That goes hard If you like I don't know Never Are not done in high school yet

Yeah And taking the song Oh man You know it's Look at this black guy next to me. You know, Bob Dylan was found underwater dead twice? It's me. I've been found underwater.

What are you talking about? Like they found him one time and they found him again underwater still dead. This is the story of me being found underwater dead. For the time they found me underwater dead. I fell down the stairs and they locked me in jail. I actually They called in a crime The way that I flailed

When I fell down the stairs A failure that did Again I love I love to I love I was just not saying anything Hey

Let's go see him for he dies Let's go see him before he dies Yeah Come see me before I perish To the grapey If I'm playing right now, I won't plan for long And I think you can get tickets for damn cheap online Because I'm gonna die

There's maybe $2 for floor seats Two dollars Nobody cares about me because I'm fucking basically dead Other times they are the same man I'm basically dead Damn he's 84 He's damn man I thought he was older

I thought he was like 99 I thought he was gone Somebody just did a movie about him Right Timmy John Timon He was like I was in Dune I was in Dune

Can I make a story with our names A lesbian cunt Asian Obama would be like Oh what is it RET me be queer Why did I ask? I know what it was I'm going to I'm going to get the president

with the board of John Strickland Merck's 1889 Shottie got me so hard my organ started, of course. Starting to fail me. The first church of Keith David presents the gape that could suck up the globe. That's insane.

The a f's slur. And it's it. Nice. Busting a nut on Kingston, calling it whitewashing. Pre-Raws, Blake 896. I got Lockjaw doing graveyard shifts to the Dixen factory

and all I got was Lockhart's previously mentioned. Call me Jack's films the way I feel myself jacking it. Wait. What the fuck is this name? Can one of you read it? Jared Fogle taking control of a black lantern ring. There is no Epstein list in Bossinging Say, Dasgui,

Digital Hike, call me Ewalk, Trump's makeup falling off to reveal Bizarro Trump and actually meant the opposite of what he's been saying the long. Young Colin eating bullets. Solomon Gundy, I goon on a Monday, Ziggy, cut off, all funding to Israel, call that BB no money. That's pretty good. Oh shit.

Clirm, 7-year-old fetus running across the earth. What is that? I don't know. How many candy necklaces does it take to hang me? Sorry, Ms. Jackson, Badly Brave, Who's New York, Nick, Atheorian, the top lowering his weapon in Halo 3, Progerion Hunter, Naferam,

and riding out our list as always, the king of haphansy! I'm coming back from grave, I'm gonna kill me, what are they wrong? Everybody's gay, everyone's gay, everybody around me is so fucking gay, and I'm scared of the gay people that are fucking gay. They're gay, and I'm not very gay, though.

But they're very gay. I want these gay people to die every day, all the gays, they keep on being gay. And everybody's like cheering and clapping around it. They're like, they're like, Yes! Bob Dylan! The melody's fire, though.

It's a really good melody. Everybody's like, Bob Dylan, let's kill every single gay person right now. All right, bye, bye, bye, bye, bye, bye, bye, start and cut up. Bye. Let me make me scared.

I want them to die really quick. Look at the picture of Young Colin. Look at Young Collin. Amazon Hub delivery wants to partner with your business. Help your business. Help your neighbors. Discover a new stream of income for your business when you partner with Amazon Hub Delivery. You and your team will deliver Amazon packages to customers in your neighborhood on a schedule that works for you. And you'll be paid for every package you deliver.

Getting started is easy. There's no delivery experience required, no long-term contracts, and you receive weekly direct deposits. Earn more. Gain exposure for your business. Apply today at Amazon.com slash hub delivery. That's Amazon.com slash HUB delivery. Know a local business that will make a great partner, a local coffee shop owner, florist, automotive shop, dry cleaner, you name it.

Refer a business today and earn $500 when they successfully join the program. Visit Amazon.com slash hub delivery to learn more or refer a partner. That's Amazon.com slash HUB delivery. Now looking for hub partners in your area. Hey, it's Ryan Seacrest for Albertsons and Safeway. Ready to save, it's time for cyber deals. Put a spring in your step with fresh savings that brighten the season. These exclusive week-long digital offers on your favorite products are only available when you shop online.

Save on eligible items from Kettle, Chabani, Quaker, Skippy, Hidden Valley, International Delight, Frito Lay, and Signature Select. Available now through March 24th on pickup or delivery orders only. Restrictions apply. See website for full-term. and conditions.