The Snark Tank - #364: Oh Brother, This Guy STINKS

Episode Date: October 11, 2025

https://www.patreon.com/TheSnarkTank

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Hey, it's Ryan Seacrest for Albertsons and Safeway. Ready to save, it's time for cyber deals. Put a spring in your step with fresh savings that brighten the season. These exclusive week-long digital offers on your favorite products are only available when you shop online. Save on eligible items from Kettle, Chobani, Quaker, Skippy, Hidden Valley, International Delight, Frito Lay, and Signature Select. Available now through March 24th on pickup or delivery orders only. Restrictions apply.

See website for full terms and conditions. Hey, hey, hey, everybody. Welcome to the Snark Tank podcast. It's me, your host, Chris. I'm here with our other hosts, Derek, and Sweeney. Look at us. Remember, just so I remember, Patreon.com slash the Snark Tank, all that stuff. Remember to, uh, remember if you're listening, by the way, if you listen to the show, if you're regular, leave us nice reviews on iTunes, all that stuff.

That actually does help. I haven't said that in a while. Comment, like, all that bullshit. You know the spiel. You might have noticed that we are remote again. Why is that? A little foreshadow on the previous episodes. Yeah.

Where it was like, oh, this dude, this dude shows up. Kinks has shows of the show all sniffling and shit, fucking sneezing. And I'm like, oh, great. And I already, I felt like I was like, this is an uphill battle because I'm traveling on the trains too. I'm fucking masking up, especially in the in the tunnels because that's where everybody's congregating. And then like, I remember the second, I think it was the second day. Like this nigga just like straight up just sneezes hard. And I'm like, I'm fucked out the mask as a bit.

And I'm like, yeah, we're just in too small of a room. Yeah. Specifically for me, I, for whatever reason, my immune system sucks. I don't know why. It's all that gay sex. It could be. It could be the like the, you know that gay people get sick easier, right?

There's a study on it. I got half like AIDS or something. I don't know. And then like it just, it like stuck somewhat or in, but it's only half. So I'm not dying, but I'm also not particularly great.

You know, there was a period of time where actually medically, medical officials actually straight up really actually thought that Cage was synonymous to gay people. That is a real. Oh yeah. It's a real. medical officials.

I want everybody to notice how eager Kingston is to switch the subject. No, no, I'm sorry. He's not rightfully blamed. I did it. I literally, everyone's sick. I didn't get you sick,

Chris, shut up. I'm sick right now, you cunt. Oh, that sucks. But, um,

yes. I didn't know you got sick too. Damn, I thought maybe it was just allergies. Because I was like, man, sorry, I was sneezing like crazy other day.

Kingston comes back from Costa Rica with a mysterious sickness. And he goes, he sits down in my, in my office and says, yeah, I'm a little sick. You asshole. Unreal. It is pretty wild. But I, I, I, I'm sorry.

I got you guys sick. If that should ever like, if that ever, if that ever like slips, you should feel bad, you know, because like, I got you guys sick. I don't feel good. So check this out. Jojo, she's going back home. She's going back home for a month, right? And, um, so her 30th birthday.

just passed and I wanted to do something. So we went out for a little dinner but I was like, I want to do some extra and it was going to be the day before she leaves, which was just the past Friday. So I was like, I had this whole thing planned out. Got sick, couldn't do it. Dang, I'm sorry about that. I'll help you

buy a present for her for her birthday when she comes back. I'll do that for you. Oh, it's hot. Let's see. What the fuck? She doesn't even like anything. She likes, she likes fucking. Get her something involving Silk Song. I know she really likes that. I was going to say like, like, Like she likes silk song. She likes some stuff. I'm being, I'm being a dickhead right now,

but I'm just saying like she, she's not like, if she likes sing song, get her a pile of, get her a pile of, get her a pile of bugs. Needles. A pile of bugs and needles.

A pile of bugs and needles. I like that a lot. I like that a lot. Don't you enjoy it? Like how violent these bugs are. Don't you love it? Oh, I feel like my face is like,

like my, I don't know. It's, it's bad. but I think like, I think it should be good in like two, three days. It's my nephews, man. They're fucking, they're just, they every time we're around them, we get sick. Yeah, because they, they kids carry like, the kids are like rats.

They just carry every fucking disease. They carry every disease and they're like, I'm pretty sure. I'm pretty sure they're, they're a perfect like specimen for diseases to like evolve. You know what I mean? I feel like they evolve quicker in kids or something. Yeah. And then they jump off of them and onto people, normal people. like proper humans.

Proper humans. That's crazy. Yeah. Kids don't, they don't fucking like cover their mouths when they cough and they touch everything. So they're, they're excellent at spreading. They open mouth cough.

That shit is crazy. When I saw that in real life, I couldn't believe it. Oh, it's insane. Like a full body like they're propelling it at you. Like it's a dragon ball like it's Ginnu. Yes.

Yes. They're ridiculous. Little kids are harbingers of disease. Like, they're all little pestilences. We got to get rid of them. I think you might be right. I feel like if I were Asman gold, would I think children should exist? Hello, hello.

I'm Malcolm Gladwell, host of Smart Talks with IBM. I recently spoke with IBM's new director of research, Jake Mbata. We discussed his vision for the future of quantum computing. At IBM research, what we always do is answer what is the future of computing, whether it's coming up with new algorithms, coming up with better AI, coming up with quantum, or coming up with just how do different accelerators go together. It's our DNA to answer the question of what is the future. Isn't it a perfect problem for IBM because you kind of need to have a legacy of building stuff? Yes. Building actual physical machines. Yeah, it's why I came

to IBM. I wanted the experience the culture of building hard things that others have not done before. Where do you imagine we are in the timeline of this technology? There will come a point when it will mature. My cell phone is a mature technology at this point. How far are we from that point with Conton? By 2029, we'll build the first fault-tolerant quantum computer. That is one that can run a very, very large, large problem. To learn how IBM is building the future of computing, visit IBM.com slash quantum. Hey, it's Ryan Sechrest for Albertsons and Safeway. It's stockup savings time now through March 31st.

Spring in for store-wide deals and earn four times of points. Look for in-store tags to earn on eligible items from Celsius, Body Armor, ORAIDA, Silk, Capri-Sun, Bavarian Meats, and Charmin. Then clip the offer in the app for automatic event-long savings. those rewards to save even more. Enjoy savings on top of savings when you shop in store or online for easy drive up and go pick up or delivery. Restrictions

apply. See website for full terms and conditions. Probably not. Probably not. And I just think I like Yeah. Aspen Gold dude. Aspen Gold, what was this tweet that he posted? Like I, look, I don't really, I don't

watch Asman. I don't watch Asman Gold to have like a fully well-rounded opinion on the guy, but like everything I see from him is the stupidest shit It's always the dumbest. It's the dumbest take. But do you have the tweet in front of you? I do have it. I do have it.

My little political side project that I pulled it up because I want to, I want to do a video about this. So the Rolling Stone just put up an article, right? Because all these comedians are saying I voted for none of this. So prominent influencers including Theo Von, Joe Rogan and Andrew Soltz are starting to distance themselves from the president. They helped propel to the White House, right? So Asmond Gold comes in with a take, and this is the first line. It says, aside from the Epstein stuff, and you're like, already like, you kind of want to pause already. Just on that alone.

But he continues, he says, Trump is doing exactly what he said he would do. Maybe there's too many crying Karens on social media so they're afraid of the optics, but this seems so dishonest. It won't work either. The bridge is burned and those people will always hate them. Now, it's a weird, like, it's interesting trying to peer into the mind of Asman Gold because we'll tackle the Epstein stuff in a second. It's, the thing saying that he's doing everything he said he would do, it's like true and not true at the same time. And it kind of depends on your perspective. Like, if you think politicians are just complete fucking liars and are going to flip flop on everything,

it's like, okay, that's the norm. You're retarded for not believing that if that's the case. and then but the as far as some of the other stuff that Trump did campaign on right like oh grocery's gonna go down this this and that like well yeah none of that shit's happening so

right you can make the case if some of those comedians are completely stupid which they are that they could have been swindled and actually believed in Trump's words maybe they maybe they genuinely do feel like

they voted for none of this however for being a grown ass person and being into the political sphere at all, if you believe politicians are not going to fucking lie to your face. It's a crazy dichotomy to appear in, to be in and not understand at this point. I don't know, man. Yeah, it's a lot because it's, well, first of all, just the obscene, that qualifier at the beginning of that sentence is amazing.

That's like saying, like, oh, aside from all the roofies and the rape, like Bill Cosby's a pretty great guy. Yeah. You know, like, or like aside from, you know, killing six million Jews, Hitler, uh, Hitler was probably a good dad or something. Like, you know, he was good for the country. He pulled the country out of a huge deficit. It's like, yeah, it's like, that's, that is a wild thing to just mask. And also, like, I'm pretty sure I've seen shit about like him trying to pardon Galane Maxwell. It's just getting, like, what do we do? Like, oh, yeah, he's going to talk about it. He's going to talk about it with the DOJ. I mean, there's one, there's one good thing coming from all of this. right there's one good thing right there's one good thing oh now we really know that if a president's about it about it they could do good shit if they want without having to worry about anyone getting in their way you know like that's like that's like a thing we know like if they're about it about like if they're really about it like if we get they get like a because the majority is republican right now if we get a majority like democrat by some means in the future or progressive the amount i want to see shit

change rose hey you are opening up the floodgates for whatever happens to you because it's prove this asshole can do this, you know? The amount that Democrats didn't do when they had majorities. It's crazy. It's fucking infuriating now, especially. Because it's like, I remember, I remember when Bernie was running and people, like, he was talking about like, oh, you could do that we could do X, Y, and Z like overnight. We could, we really could do it.

And I remember, like, a bunch of, like, Hillary adjacent people back then being like, you can't just sign executive orders and get shit done like that. That's not how that works. There's a process. And it's like, well, Oh, no. You're a fucking completely wrong. Obviously.

Oh, my God. You know what pissed me off about shit like that is because back in the day, even when like say George Bush or Obama, when like when it would be when it would be wartime circumventing Congress was like the norm. When Congress is supposed to be you have Congress has to approve going to war. They would just circle. They didn't care. It was even to the point where Congress was like, this was during like. the Obamna years where it's like, nigger, we'll just ask us

first, we'll approve it, but they just wanted to be respected. Like, people in power just like, we're gonna, we would have let you do it. You don't have to circumvent all of these and do all these proxy wars without our consent. And I'm just like, they can, whatever they want done can get done. And it was like, I would see campaign trail,

old stuff like people yelling at Obama about like the wars or immigration. He's like, right, instead of yelling, we have to do it by policy. And I'm like, no, you're, you're lying. You're, you're, you're just saying that as if like, because that's an excuse. The people I say, man, they're always trying to, uh, hold them down and do this and this and that. But it's like, look what happens when the executive branch actually wants things done.

Even when Biden stopped the fucking, uh, pull the troops out of Afghanistan. When they actually want to get shit done, they do it. Very possible. And so this is what I'm afraid of. I'm afraid that, let's just say, you know, Trump doesn't run for third term. He dies or whatever the fuck happens. Gavin Newsom becomes the guy. This is what I'm afraid of because right now he's playing like hardball and being like,

oh, they're drawing the redrawing maps and getting extra seats. We're going to do that shit too. But then as soon as he becomes president, you're like, ah, I'm going to become a corporateist again. I'm just going to maintain the status quo. Yeah. And then it's like, uh, second amendment guys? I don't know. It's getting ridiculous.

Yeah, I don't know, brother. It's getting ridiculous. So, yeah. But speaking on this, we do have a question. Oh, okay. From animatronic, Animatronic Sweeney powered by Gay Eye, wrote in. Gay I said dumb.

That's crazy. I can't believe I haven't heard that before, actually. But. First time. So he says, question for animatronic Sweeney. Are you listening? Mm-hmm. All right.

I don't know what this is. I think you would understand it though because of your nature. 0-1-0-0-0-0-1-0-0-1-0-1-0-1-0-1-0-1-1-1-1-1-1. If it's in binary code, that's going to take a week for you to read. There really is quite a lot of it. So just bear with me. Yeah. 0-0-1-1-1-1-1-1-1-1-1-1-1-1.

And then it keeps not going like that. So what's your response? Eggs. All right. I would, I don't know what the question is, presuming it's about food. I don't know what the, it's probably about the prices, the prices of eggs. Yeah, what's the most expensive food right now maybe is what the question was. Yeah.

I wonder what this actually is. I wonder if I could run this through like a binary translation thing and see what it is. Probably. I'm going to do that. I'm sure. It must be simple. Yeah. Binary translation.

Yeah. And see why he chose eggs, since he clearly understands the question. I would be really disappointed if it's nothing. It's if you read this, you are gay. I knew it. I fucking knew it. So you're gay.

So you're gay. I guess so. I guess so. The joke's on me ultimately at the end of the day. Yeah. Well, aside from that, That was pretty cool. Aside from everything about the question, that question was pretty good.

That's crazy. Yeah. Aside from being a vapid killer, this guy's pretty swell. Oh, man. What, how, um, we had a, we already, we talked about that like episodes ago on how, like, a little rant that just not understanding how is, Asman Gold is still the frontrunner, I guess, when it comes to political views, I guess, because, like, I know he's popular. He is by, by, like, definition just because he's like, I think he's in that space. He has, he gets the most concurrent viewers.

And I honestly, it started with gaming and stuff like that. But when he talks about politics, the people didn't leave. And he recently had a take that if it was up to him, he would disenfranchise over 90% of voters. And I'm just like, this, people are still listening to this person. Yeah, he's a, he's a, I don't know, he's a rat haired loser. I don't know. That's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, might as well just say, like, if it was up to me, I would kill everyone that doesn't look like me.

And, oh, cool. And then like, I guess people would still just watch him and be like, who's based, he's base, man. You know, like, I guess everybody would have to like, you know, stop showering for years, grow up their hair. have a little goatee and then just befriend roaches and then the landscape is so gross

it's just like it's just so many stupid people he was talking he was giving some take that was like insane about because he was trying I think he was trying to maybe talk about the ghost of Yote because there's like a whole thing about like how like it that's games woke or whatever oh yeah it's not as intense of a campaign

as I've seen for like other games in the past because I think a lot of that stuff is kind of dying honestly because it's getting trite and really predictable. Yeah. But it's there still. And he was talking about like how like, I think it's doing okay, but it says you're that sold over a million copies in like a day or something. Like, how's that possible? That doesn't seem logical. And I'm like, what? Hello, hello. I'm Malcolm Gladwell, host of Smart Talks with IBM. I recently spoke with IBM's new director of research, Jake Mbeta. We discussed his vision for the future of quantum computing. At IBM research,

which what we always do is answer what is the future of computing, whether it's coming up with new algorithms, coming up with better AI, coming up with quantum, or coming up with just how do different accelerators go together. It's our DNA to answer the question of what is the future. Isn't it a perfect problem for IBM because you kind of need to have a legacy of building stuff? Yes. Building actual physical machines.

Yeah, it's why I came to IBM. I wanted the experience, the culture of building hard things that others have not done before. Where do you imagine we are in the timeline of this technology? There will come a point when it will mature. Right? Yeah. My cell phone is a mature technology at this point. How far are we from that point with Kondo?

By 2029, we'll build the first fault-tolerant quantum computer. That is one that can run a very, very large, large problem. To learn how IBM is building the future of computing, visit IBM.com slash quantum. Hey, it's Ryan Sechrest for Albertsons and Safeway. Ready to save, it's time for cyber deals. Put a spring in your step with fresh savings that brighten the season. These exclusive week-long digital offers on your favorite products are only available when you shop online.

Save on eligible items from Kettle, Chabani, Quaker, Skippy, Hidden Valley, International Delight, Frito Lay, and Signatures Select. Available now through March 24th on pickup or delivery orders only. Restrictions apply. See website for full terms and conditions. Where have you been? What do you mean? Why?

It doesn't seem like, like why is that illogical? Halo 3 in like 2007 sold like $8 million in the first like week. Why would $1 million in a day for a way bigger install base? I don't know. He doesn't know anything, actually. Like, it's crazy how little he knows about anything that he talks about. And I think that's maybe why people like him because they know just as little. And so it's like, oh, look, somebody who's just as stupid as I am.

And they're like, and they're like successful. And like, you know, they, they have a career doing nothing. I want that. I want a career where I don't have to work. I want to not do anything meaningful. And I'm also this stupid. So maybe one day, maybe that, that's kind of me. if I think about it.

Maybe I can be one day stupid and rich. Yeah. You're already halfway there. You're actually on to something. Actually, because I even thought about that with all the way back in the day with Bam Margera. That was something that I even said. I was like, man, I wish I could just be rich being a fucking moron on camera. You know, like he wasn't doing it.

He was just terrorizing his family. And then like that was the bit. And that was the stick. And I was like, okay. And so I think you're absolutely right about that. where people just look to Asmond Gold and they think, wow, what a fucking moron. I want that. Or they think, or they think, oh, he's, he's successful and way grosser than me.

So I must be doing okay. It's like, it's like almost like a, you know what I mean? Like it makes you feel better in some way. Oh, yeah. I don't know. Maybe. There's something to it. I think a lot of it plays into the fact that he sucks and people want to see him fail to.

I think that's another thing. I don't know if he has a lot of hate watchers. I don't know. I think anyone that is shit as him has to have a decent amount of hate watchers. There's just no, there's just no way he's in a fully loved community. There's no possible way there's a community that unanimously loves him and enjoys him. They're like a bunch of terrible people that you ever, it's like say the KKK, they're all best friends with each other. You know what I'm saying?

They're all like terrible people. But when they're all hanging out together, they're having cake and stuff. picnics and stuff and they're like the skies blue and like oh love you brother like it's like all of the nazi documentaries i've seen where it's like people are oh they invited us into their encampment or whatever they're all lovey-dovey with each other and they're so they're so nice to the to the person that is documenting and i'm like this is crazy you guys are the worst people on earth but you're like come have come to our barbecue brother oh man we got this new spice from that down the road you know like my barbecue come to let me squeeze your

thigh under the table. Come here. Come here. Come here. Come here. Come to our KKK barbecue. That's crazy. No one's touched my thigh ever in my life probably. And it's going to stay like that. I don't just don't remember. Yeah. You blocked it. I don't think it's probably, you probably never touch my thigh. Yeah. I don't, I don't fuck with that. Don't touch my thigh. It was the, it was the neighborhood deacon touched your thigh. You don't want to. You don't want to remember. Yeah, yeah, yeah. One of squeezing my thigh would send me into a ballistic. I want you to remember. Let's go to therapy. And let's,

let's unlock some memories. Yeah. I actually have to do that. I have to set up for therapy. Why? Yeah, of course. What's going on with you?

Just to, you know, just reviews. Just reviews. Just to, just to read, which go reestablish like my stress dealing. You spiraling?

Let's just, really establish my stress dealing habits. Okay. You're spiraling. Not yet. I could. I could, you know.

Two or three bad things that happened. I could be back on the fucking, back on the bandwagon of fucking crazy again. But I think I should probably just go. When you know, this reestablish a connection. If you, if you had like horrible turbulence, right? Like you're going back to Costa Rica or whatever.

And the turbulence is bad. Like you guys drop like, you know, like a thousand feet. And then a fucking, an old man just lands. He lands on your lap because, you know,

he didn't have a seatbelt on. How do you think you would feel? Uh, I think that's the least of what's going on, you know? Like, that's like such a minute part of the, whole situation.

Yeah, but like, you know, you recover, right? Like, you drop like a thousand feet. So it's like, it's fucking terrifying. But then it's like, oh, we're good. You know, and then like there's just an old man in your lap. And then while he's trying to get up, he is grabbing your thighs. He's sinking his fingers into your thighs trying to like base himself. He's trying to like, you know, he's trying to like get himself up.

And you're trying to like pull his hands off of your thighs, but he's so strong that like nothing's working. How did you? I was like, how did you? I think it'd be funny because it'd be like, does he speak Spanish or is the English? He is actually, he is a British man and he's actually hunting

for prey for Epstein Island 2. Well, I don't know. First, I'd be like, Kay can get off me. He doesn't get off me. I'd be like, hey, seriously, please get off me. And then I'd warn him, hey, I'm going to get violent. Sir, you have, I'm going to get violent. I'm going to get violent if you don't.

touching me sir. So you're warm in grace. You're warm to attempt to like, he would attempt to be like, oh, try to continue talking in and I would just start choking him. I would just start choking him. I can't hear you.

I can't hear my hearing age fell out. And then I would choke this old man unconscious and to put him in a seat beside me. And there's a leave him there. And then the fucking US Marshall fucking attacks you because for some reason. So what? I'm already,

if that's already happening, I'm already feral and like, might as well kill me. I'm not safe to have on that point. You fucking. I'm just endangering other people at that moment. You're balancing like Wolverine on people at this point. It's such a tiny,

my big ass is a tiny space. It's such a tiny space. And I'm a maneuver directly to him. That's such a fantastic visual. Local Spotify skipaholic rodent. Nice. You skipping your own five songs is crazy. They're your songs.

You made it. So listen, listen, local Spotify, skip a hologrode. He says, start a show reacting to Sweeney's camera roll. Oof. I don't work in air. Yeah. We couldn't do it. We could do it on Patreon only for a little bit until the FBI gets involved.

It's literally just a bunch of people probably getting murdered. It's probably like real people getting murdered. Real dogs getting strangled. No animal deaths on my, there's not. There's not a single. It's probably a baby seal getting sucked into an astrolave. Yeah. It's probably, um, there is not a baby in a tumble dryer.

Like this is not a single one. Not a single animal or child dying on my thing. They definitely get hurt though. You sent me, you sent me a compilation of seals getting clubbed a penis music the other day. This is real. I also saw this. Dad, I need to make that.

I need to make that. It really would not be possible. Like we couldn't do that show. Yeah, we could. No, we couldn't. My camera roll is not that fucked up anymore. I've definitely toned it down. Yeah, I've toned it down a little bit.

Nope. I don't believe you heard that. I heard that hesitation. That's, that's not true. I'm trying to be even an accurate description. Let's see. Right now my camera feed is currently,

it's Piccolo transforming and flying at somebody. All right. Turn your phone off. There's a scene from the, fourth streck movie where they after the end when they capture rumple still skin they blow up his goose and then shrek points and laughs at it and then they

force him to dance so stupid that scene is amazing oh Chris do you have an Xbox 360 right now like not currently in like my vicinity I have an Xbox 360 in New York yeah okay

so I, you know, one of the hardest things to do right when you're sick is to, okay, you're sick, you're supposed to just do nothing, right? That's hard for me to do, but I really force myself. And to do that, I was like, fuck it. I got an Xbox 360 and I was like, I want to just play some of my old games. Oh, man. Dude, I, I felt like I was 80 years old trying to get it connected to the fucking internet, dude. It was, I couldn't believe how difficult it was.

Yeah. I just, because I just thought like, oh, you just, it'll just work. I just thought it would just work. But I guess the biggest problem is the, the, the, the, the, the fucking, the gigahertz. So like the, yeah, it doesn't fuck with 5G. And even like most internet, right, most routers have two different frequencies. And so to me, it's simple. It'll just, it'll recognize the 2.4 and then it should be no problem. No. No, so I had to eventually. create a fucking hot spot on my Wi-Fi and then wait for it to recognize that that's even happening. That's crazy. Dude. And then after that happened, there was, instead of there just being one big update, which I would have been like, okay, there was three concurrent.

Like, it kept happening. And at one point, I was, I was about to kill myself. I was like, I'm giving up. This is it. I'm so done. You should have. You should have. You know what I want?

You totally should have. I earnestly want to get my hands on one of the, like an early 360 that hasn't been updated yet. One with like the blades, the old, the old menu on it. I would, I would actually pay money for like for a 360 that was completely unupdated. That'd be cool. The problem is I would have, the problem is like I would imagine that a lot of unupdated 360s are dead. Yeah. Absolutely.

You know, they're probably 100% destroyed or red ringed or whatever. Yeah, finding one of those be tough. Yeah. Hello, hello, I'm Malcolm Gladwell, host of Smart Talks with IBM. I recently spoke with IBM's new director of research, Jake Mbata. We discussed his vision for the future of quantum computing. At IBM research, what we always do is answer what is the future of computing, whether it's coming up with new algorithms, coming up with better AI,

coming up with quantum, or coming up with just how do different accelerators go together. It's our DNA to answer the question. of what is the future. Isn't it a perfect problem for IBM because you kind of need to have a legacy of building stuff? Yes. Building actual physical machines.

Yeah, it's why I came to IBM. I wanted the experience, the culture of building hard things that others have not done before. Where do you imagine we are in the timeline of this technology? There will come a point when it will mature, right?

Yeah. My cell phone is a mature technology at this point. How far are we from that point with Quantum? By 2029, we'll build the first fault-tolerant quantum computer. That is one that can run a very, very large, large problem. To learn how IBM is building the future of computing, visit IBM.com slash quantum. Hey, it's Ryan Seacrest for Albertsons and Safeway. It's stockup savings time now through March 31st. Spring in for storewide deals and earn four times of points. Look for in-store tags to earn on eligible items from Celsius, body armor, ORAIDA, silk, Capri-Sung, Bavarian Meets, and Charmin. Then clip the offer in the app for automatic event-long savings.

Stack up those rewards to save even more. Enjoy savings on top of savings when you shop in-store or online for easy drive-up and go pick up or delivery. Restrictions apply. See website for full terms and conditions. Yeah, no, I haven't used my 360 in a long time. I think I turned it on when I was home last time to play something. I can't remember what the fuck it was.

I got to say, though, the port the porting, the, I was surprised by the quality of the graphics, I got to say. Because for example, when I was playing the, when I was playing, say, 360 games, like the classic arcade type stuff on the Xbox one, like, oh, let me pull up Dragon Age or whatever. It looked like piss. And then like pulling up the Xbox 360 version and just putting it and running it through the, you know, the HTML. It looks fucking fantastic. I was really surprised by it.

I didn't think it was going to like look as good as it did. There's something to it like where you know how like old games on CRTs look better than they do. if they're running through like a normal like HDTV that like doesn't use like scan lines and stuff. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. It's not the same exact thing, but there's something like that happening, I think. We're like just because they were building for those machines, I think they're like, oh, we can make it look really good for these machines.

Yeah. And then when it's like ported forward, it just kind of like. Yeah, it's like a snapshot of, go ahead. Like you one. Sorry.

No, like it just like upreses everything to the point where it's just like, oh, that's not actually how it's supposed to look. Now it's going to look weird. You know, because older machines kind of account for like blurriness and and shit like that. I don't know. Yeah.

There is definitely something to it because, yeah, I was playing this. I remember like say, yeah, yeah, I was just, I put in a handful of games and I was, I was thinking, especially with my big ass TV, that it was going to, I was like, oh, definitely the quality is going to suffer because of this. And it did not at all. And that's the thing that shocked me. I was like, this looks fucking great. The 360 is a good fucking machine, man.

Like, that was just a good, that was, that was some good times. Yeah. It was good shit. I don't know. It's crazy thinking about like how, like where they're at now. Like, it's true. It's like night and day difference. It's, it's truly insane.

They haven't had a true W since. Like a true W where everyone unanimously was like, was like, yeah, man, this rules. I mean, I was looking at the numbers of, I forgot about this. I was looking at the numbers when the Kinect first dropped. And even that was successful. I forgot about that.

Like the 360 Connect, that even though those numbers did inceptually well. And I'm like, this is, this is almost a business history to me. Everybody thought that was the direction, that direction everything was going. Right.

I was like, this is kind of stupid, but people were like, no, this is where gaming's going to end up. And I'm like, all right, sure.

Thanks, Kingson, I want you to guess, how many connect uh how many connect how many connect how many connect cameras were sold yes in like two million 24 million insane insane that is fucking ridiculous niggins will buy anything and by the way just anything it's insane to me by the way it needs to it needs to be noted that this it's sold 24 million connect units by february 2013 so before the next console even came out that forced you to buy Connect with it.

Yeah. So that was like completely voluntary people, 24 million people. And I think that the voluntary was so important. The fact that the first version of Xbox One forced you to buy a Connect. Dude, like, there's no, there's no more consequential. That's, that is probably one of the most consequential things that has happened in the gaming space in the, last like 20 years. Yeah.

Was that reveal event where they just were like, here's the Xbox one. You can watch football on it. You can plug your cable box into it. People tried to defend it. People try to defend it. That's what's crazy. People were trying to defend it. Personally, I didn't come across that.

I feel like Jalen. I feel like Jalen. I feel like Jalen was trying to defend it. Oh no way. Because he was, him and Chris were the Xbox people. We were the Xbox people. I was more, I was more on the Nintendo side back then, but I enjoyed all three for them.

most part. But like, people were defending and I was like, guys, that's stupid. I didn't see anybody. It's just stupid. Interesting. Well, here's the thing. Well, here's the thing. I remember being thoroughly like, I don't care about any of this. I remember talking about it from the perspective of like, look, this is fine.

All of this functionality is fine. But this should not be the way that you reveal your machine. Yes. To the world. Like, you, if you're revealing a gaming console. Because I remember this like it was, I really remember. this so vividly. They had their Xbox one reveal event. They

unveiled the console for the first time. It was a big deal. Everybody was checking in because the 360 was hot. You know, it was like the 360 was, um, the PS3 was gaining a lot because of the last of us and obviously there were so many 360s dying that eventually people just kind of like moved moved over.

And so they were becoming like more, PlayStation was becoming more legitimate. But people were still like excited about like, oh, what's the next Xbox going to be? And so they showed it and it was just TV. It was it was cable box. It was football. It was ESPN.

It was like picture and picture. It was the connect being forced with it. And you're just like, what the fuck is this? And then three weeks later, E3 happened or two and a half weeks later E3 happened where their entire presentation was only video games. That was why they did it. That was why they had the reveal event with all the extra features because they were like E3 is going to be all games. No bullshit. no hardware no nothing.

But I'm just like, brother, just reorganize that then. Yes. Just do if you're going to show like, oh, you can plug other machines into your Xbox. That's kind of cool. But like that shouldn't be the first thing I know about it. Yeah. That should have that should have been three weeks after. Yes.

Yes. And it's so crazy to me because it's just like, I think about that all the time where I'm just like, dude, whoever decided the order of these things, that's like a little, you know, the meme. the little domino the little domino and like it's it's like something like I don't know

a painter gets rejected from art school and then the big domino the Holocaust yeah yeah it's like it's like that where it's just like oh we should put we should put the football stuff

first and then the games after that guy what it is killed the Xbox yeah that guy murdered the machine and granted it had its own issues because it had like obviously the Force Connect was stupid

Like that wouldn't have gone over well anyway The game sharing bullshit Like it was a bunch of stuff The game sharing and the DRM Those are the but those are those are those are things that could have been Ameliorated right which they were Which they did But like

That was the first impression Can I can I tell you it's like imagine Imagine there's a gun right And you're like this a gun presentation right And then you show the gun presentation It's like this gun does not get eroded by piss And you take the gun out Instead of showing that it can like shoot in a 360 area, this gun cannot be eroded by piss.

It's impossible. They're pissing all over the gun. This has no effect on this gun at all. It's none. And people are like, that's interesting. Yes. But I'm not buying a gun for that. That's a gun.

How good does it shoot? It is like, but I remember back in the day, dude, articles were the screenshots. They were showing because the first thing that they showed was prices. right. The price is right. So there was like, it's burned into my memory of people just shitting all over them being like, this is, it was a perfect representation of this is what they're about right now. And it was a fucking 11 a.m. stupid game show that like has nothing to do with gaming itself in, video games. And it was like, the optics were so bad. It was so stupid. And they and they did that because they were looking at the data and they were like, oh, the overwifers.

majority of the people who use Xbox 360 spend most of their time like watching like Netflix and stuff. Yeah. We should cater to that audience and I'm like, sure, but like oh my God, it's just so crazy because that's a

secondary purpose. You know, that's a secondary purpose that people find a lot of value and it's not the thing that you've got to market your machine. It's so insane that that I can't get over how avoidable that was and how obvious, the fact that there was no sane person in the room being like, hey, don't do that.

is so bewildering to me. Right. Because even I as like a kid in college understood that like that would be a terrible, a terrible barking decision. And to be fair, I remember especially once the, um, when the Xbox 1S, like when that remodel came out, like I like that machine ultimately at the end of the day. Yeah. It was a pretty good machine. I still have one. But like, but they just like, it's crazy how that reveal event really killed that brand entirely.

Yep. Like without that reveal event, without that reveal event, I don't think you would have even a remotely similar environment to the environment that you have now. I don't think you have GamePass. I don't think Game Pass would exist honestly. You wouldn't have Game Pass. Game Pass wouldn't be around.

There would still be a reason to buy an Xbox, probably. Yeah. It's like in a fight when someone gets hit and you know they didn't recover well from it. You're like, oh, that guy's still, that guy's fucking... They got CTE, man. Yeah. It's just that they're not leeing right now. That guys are out of leeing in a little.

that bathtub making a mess. You know what's so weird? They could have, even after all that bullshit, I feel like they could have just even after that. They could have made several decisions. They could say to fix it.

And then one thing that wasn't necessarily their fault, but like say one of the, there was a big bundle with the Xbox One S, which came with Assassin's Creed Unity. And that, unfortunately, Hello, hello. I'm Malcolm Gladwell, host of Smart Talks with IBM. I recently spoke with IBM's new directly,

a research, Jake M. Beta, we discussed his vision for the future of quantum computing. At IBM research, what we always do is answer what is the future of computing, whether it's coming up with new algorithms, coming up with better AI, coming up with quantum, or coming up with just how do different accelerators go together. It's our DNA to answer the question of what is the future. Isn't it a perfect problem for IBM because you kind of need to have a legacy of building stuff? Yes. Building actual physical machines. Yeah, it's why I came to IBM.

I wanted the experience, the culture of building hard things that others have not done before. Where do you imagine we are in the timeline of this technology? There will come a point when it will mature. Right? My cell phone is a mature technology at this point. How far are we from that point with Conton? By 2029, we'll build the first fault-tolerant quantum computer. That is one that can run a very, very large, large problem.

To learn how IBM is building the future of computing, visit IBM.com slash quantum. Hey, it's Ryan Sechrest for Albertsons and Safeway. Ready to save, it's time for cyber deals. Put a spring in your step with fresh savings that brighten the season. These exclusive week-long digital offers on your favorite products are only available when you shop online. Save on eligible items from Kettle, Chabani, Quaker, Skippy, Hidden Valley, International Delight, Frito Lay, and Signatures Select. Available now through March 24th on pickup or delivery orders only.

Restrictions apply. See website for full terms and conditions. Xbox kind of took a hit with that too. Because it wasn't their fault, but that was a huge selling point, that bundle. I even bought it, actually. Well, dude, it was a bunch of things, too, because it was that. and then like a year later the Master Chief Collection came out

and it was completely fucked so it was just like you just had like a string of like really bad things happened where I'm just like you're the 343 343 343 shot the bed with Halo their flagship

the only good the only good flags they had was forza do you guys remember you guys remember you guys remember phantom dust when they showed up

when they were like Phantom dust is coming back and everybody was like weird cool uh just kidding phantom dust was like a it was like an old

older, it was like an original Xbox game that like, it was very weird, but it was coming back and it was like a huge trailer for it. Everybody was like, oh shit, cool. What a weird thing to make again. Like, yeah. Canceled. Just kidding. There was that platinum game where you hunted dinosaurs or whatever,

scale bound, I think it was called. That got canceled as well. And it's just like what is, and most recently, fucking perfect dark. Oh yeah, I remember that getting I was actually looking forward to that. That looked cool. And I'm just like, oh man, you're just shit in the bed. You know what's fucking crazy. Do you know how long it's been?

You know, we just saw Wolverine again. Yeah. For PlayStation, right? That had been in limbo for a while, right? Because you remember it had that big leak. Yeah. Everybody, like, leaked a bunch of gameplay for it. The reveal trailer for that was in 2021. And we're just seeing it. Was it really 2021? That's crazy. It was 2021. I looked it up this morning. And I was just like, man, it's been four years since we've seen that game. And, like,

everybody was starting to be like yo what the fuck is going on like is this even happening anymore we saw it it's happening again it's been even longer since fable that's true was announced it's been even longer since fucking elder scroll six and you know that that's not out anytime soon so it's like they just they miss man i can't what a layup to fumble man they've been you were Busting loads into the sky and kidding themselves with it. Dude, all you had to do is make the 360 again and have it not die. All you had to do is make a 360 that wouldn't die 50% of the time and you would have nailed it. Yeah.

Like you would have had at the very least, you might not have won the next generation or whatever, but you would have been damn near on par. You would have been like maybe within like 10 million units sold of the other guy. Now it's like the series X consoles, both of them by the way, like the series S and X together are selling worse at this point in their lifetime than the Xbox one did in its lifetime. Well, that is crazy. It's like, yeah, people have given up, especially now that there isn't even

exclusive essentially. So what the fuck? Why the fuck? Why do me, a consumer? I thought about this because I don't have the new consoles. And I was like, at some point, you know, as a collector, I was like, ah, maybe I get, well, first of all, the price is going up. So absolutely not.

And then even if the price wasn't going up, I'm like, do I do I need one? I mean, it just makes sense to just wait to get it on fucking PC or fucking PlayStation. Like, just get a fucking PS5. I would way more leaning on that side because like there's, there's way big, there's way more reasons to own a PS5 than there is like it's not even, it's not even an argument. Yeah. Really. So I'm just like, what the fuck even is this?

And, and again, unfortunately, what do you think about naming? I hate that naming matters, but Jesus Christ, I mean, you think about the Wii you and people being confused on what the fuck the Wii is. I saw a video recently actually where a guy bought the Wii you. He was like 12 years old or whatever. His parents bought it. And his friend came over to play. And after hours of playing, his friend was like, what even is the Wii anyway? Like, he didn't understand that it was the latest console. He thought maybe it was like an extension of the week. People were confused. And the same thing with fucking Xbox One. And then now go to Xbox Series. S and X where it's like People are like, What is this? It's even worse. Like, it's crazy that they made a name worse than Xbox 1.

They did. Xbox 1 is not a good name by any metric, but it's like, it's better than series X and series S. Like, what are you doing? Yeah. Like, hey, what do I do to make it sound

like the furthest away from a console? Like, like, what do we do, guys? The Xbox Gym. I'll never forget. You know, I'll never forget. For some reason, this is burned in my memory because I just, I was so bewildered by it when I learned it. But like, before the Xbox Series X was like revealed or announced or like or properly named, I can't remember what the code name was.

But like, they were talking about, they were asking Phil Spencer about like, what's the, what's the name of the console going to be? I know they were like, I know you can't say because you have an event probably about this at some point in the future. But like, what is, what can you tell us about the name of the next console? And he said, I will never forget this. It's burned into my brain. He said, the console is named. The console's name will reflect what it does.

And so then, and so then, you know, months later, you see Xbox Series X. And then I think back to that quote, I'm like, what the fuck do you mean? Chris, what does that mean? When you stupid, it does Series X. I mean, obviously. Dude, I couldn't believe, because I was like, that is, that's just not, you didn't know, you either just didn't understand the question or you didn't understand your answer. You know, like, I don't know what you thought you were saying.

Is it possible that they had a completely different name at the time? I hope so. Because Jesus Christ, what a terrible name. That sounds like the answer for the Xbox one, because like the all in one Xbox one, Xbox one. It reflects on what it does. So I'm like... Exactly. But that at least I could see...

That at least made sense to me. I didn't agree. I was a dumb name. Yeah. But like I could see at least the connection point where it's just like, oh, it's an all-in-one machine Xbox one. It's like, okay, I get it. That's stupid.

But like I get the train of logic that you meant to... That makes that sentence true. Yeah. Series X literally says nothing. It literally does not imply... It doesn't imply anything. It's like a phone. You would think that Xbox...

for making phones or some shit. Like, oh, the galaxy, Galaxy S-25 or whatever the fuck. How much, let me ask you something. How much do you think in Xbox Series X is right now? Um, um, $600, I think. $650.

$6.50. Why the fuck would you buy that? Who would buy that? They don't, they don't, they've lost all of their fan, they've lost all of their dire fan base. That's one. They've lost it. They shit the bed. And that's a big problem is because of the fact that they made,

GamePass. Game pass completely took half of the fan base of them. And like, I'm just going to play this on the computer where it's better to play it. It also, if, you know, it'd be fine. If Game Pass was on the computer, but it didn't use the Xbox controller, I think they would have been fine. I think if the Xbox controller just was

not compatible with PCs correctly, that would have been a smarter decision for them. You people continue to buying it. That's crazy. It's insane. It's insane, but it's also like... That's such a terrible. It's technically genius. That's diabolical. Well, Game Pass happened because they were just so desperate.

They were like they were losing so bad and they were like, we need something. Let's do let's let's do a movie pass type situation, even though movie pass didn't end well at all, if you remember. Uh-huh. Um, so like the fact, dude, the movie, the, uh, the freaking movie pass, I have it and we utilize that shit so much. We are stealing so much money from people. What do you mean? You don't have movie passes as it existed. Like there was old one. The old one that came out like the old was crazy. That shit was insane. The old movie pass was. just like you're bankrupting yourself doing this. But when the pre-COVID

one was nuts because it was like $20 or something like that and it's unlimited movies people were like, I'm going to go to movies every fucking day. Every fucking day. Every day. I'm going to go multiple times a day. I'm going to spend my fucking week here. I'm going to take a week off work and I will see a bunch of

fucking movies. Fuck you. Yeah. If you took a week off of work and then just spent that week seeing movies you probably would end up make, like, that price would probably even out at some point. I feel like that would make sense. That is so wild.

It's outrageous, man. I don't know. They're pretty much done. It seems like they're, they're in their kind of Sega situation now. And I think Xbox is going to continue to exist in like as, in the same way that Sega does. 100%.

But that machine is like, I saw, I see people online being like, no, Xbox is going to, they're going to make more hardware. and I'm like, look, maybe they will. I don't know what the point would be because you can get everything on PC. I just don't get it. Like, it's selling worse than the Xbox one

and you don't really have a diehard consumer base anymore. Like, I was a pretty big Xbox guy. I still technically am, but like, if the next generation happens and my choices between a PlayStation and an Xbox, like, there's no shot that I'm, going to buy an Xbox. Yeah. It's like there's simply no shot. I mean, just, dude, just, I just think to back in the day, the reason why it just made so much sense

gears, um, the EA games, like I was playing fucking Dragon Age. I was playing Mass Effect. Like, I was playing like everything, everything, all of my favorite games, fucking Skyrim, before, you know, all that stuff later, way later got ported to PS3. And they were fucked when they first reported to all those games. So like, yeah, it was, it was, it was, it made complete since, like Xbox 360 was fucking dope. Like, it just made sense to have it. And now, like, none of that. Absolutely

no exclusives like that. Well, it doesn't, Halo, like, like, let's say it's like PC especially. Everybody's starting to get a PC now that could run some fucking games decently. Hello, hello. I'm Malcolm Gladwell, host of Smart Talks with IBM.

I recently spoke with IBM's new director of research, Jake Gambata. We discussed his vision for the future of quantum computing. At IBM research, what we always do is answer what is the future of computing, whether it's coming up with new algorithms, coming up with better AI, coming up with quantum, or coming up with just how do different accelerators go together. It's our DNA to answer the question of what is the future.

Isn't it a perfect problem for IBM because you kind of need to have a legacy of building stuff? Yes. Building actual physical machines. Yeah, it's why I came to IBM. wanted the experience, the culture of building hard things that others have not done before. Where do you imagine we are in the timeline of this technology? There will come a point when it will mature, right? My cell phone is a mature technology at this point. How far are we from that point with Kondo? By 2029, we'll build the first fault-tolerant quantum computer.

That is one that can run a very, very large, large problem. To learn how IBM is building the future of computing, visit IBM.com slash quantum. Hey, it's Ryan Sechrest for Albertsons and Safeway. Ready to save, it's time for cyber deals. Put a spring in your step with fresh savings that brighten the season. These exclusive week-long digital offers on your favorite products are only available when you shop online. Save on eligible items from Kettle, Chabani, Quaker, Skippy, Hidden.

Valley, International Delight, Frito Lay, and Signatures Select. Available now through March 24th on pickup or delivery orders only. Restrictions apply. See website for full terms and conditions. So why wouldn't I just play it on my computer? I'm going to have a computer anyway. And why wouldn't I? What the fuck do I need that machine for?

It just, so if they do make another one, it, it, okay, I guess for collectors, that's cool, you know, like to have this another machine. But other than that, nope. thing better have a pussy. You know, like I just don't understand. I don't understand what you're, I don't understand how you could possibly sell this thing with no pussy involved.

That's revolutionary. Like, you just like you need this needs to have, it needs to have a flesh light in it. It needs to be, it needs to self clean. That's crazy. Dude,

the sex box. They introduced, sex box. They introduced in the sex box. That actually would, that would save them. That would actually save them. That would,

that would, Not this version of the world. It would have ruined them even more. No, it would not. I really don't. I think it would ruin public perception, but the stocks would go crazy. You're not going to see kids opening up like, you're going to see parents buying it for their kids during Christmas time. No, you're not.

You're going to see the sales spike crazy high. Yay, a sex box. Yay! All right, though, to be, go fuck it. Go fucking. You know, like, go fucking. They just won't know. They'll let the light of their parents be like, oh, it's just called that because.

because it stands for something. It's an acronym. There's no sex involved. He's like hunched over. Even though there's a full on, there's a full on picture of a real vagina. Like the whole front of the box is a real vagina. It has a pussy on it.

You can't even. It's insane. Having, imagine, you think people buy fucking sex toys with clitoris is? Like, imagine buying that. I mean, it's weirder. I feel like it's just weirder to ask for one that doesn't have.

I feel like they just kind of like have a standard. I feel like, for that is so crazy because that's the part of the like you don't you don't that's the part is so not consequential to what you're doing you know that's the part that that's the part that's the part that that's the part that you don't care about is what you're saying yeah well like it's like for a sex toy yes for a sex toy why do I care about that what is the point of that well I think then then what's the point of it even looking like a vagina then it just needs exactly really honestly from me you're right you don't you you thought you defeated me Derek you actually fell right

into my trap yes yes I mean no for real though, like, it is, it is weird. I want to look like a bop it. I want to just look like nothing. Just, because you're just trying to get off anyway, right? You're not, you're not trying to simulate sex with a fucking flashlight. That's crazy. I'm not trying to take it on a date. No, I just want to bang it and throw it off on me.

It really is. Throw it against the wall, never clean it. I just, I think, I think about how avoidable this was for, like, so often because I'm just like, dude, you didn't have to, you really didn't have to do any of this. It really shows you that like, this is your fault. When they were doing the presentation, they were like, hey, I want Chris Maldonado to be really upset after this. And they did it.

I wasn't even upset. I was just like, why? It was a slow burn. It was a slow burn. They knew it was going to get you eventually. And they were like, awesome. Yeah. I've still nowhere near the most upset.

It's just, it's fine by me. Like, like, I think, I think it results in a lamer industry to have like less competition. I think like, it was beneficial. like I would much rather prefer like a strong Xbox and a strong PlayStation exist alongside each other because that I feel like that really was the best kind of generation that we had was when they were both doing kind of well or it was when they were both like actually like sparring realistically and like you know we got some good shit out of it whereas like now I feel like lately it's just been like PlayStation has been dominating and it just kind of feels like you

you feel that lack of competition in the industry kind of I feel like PlayStation is dominating the console space, but I think the console space night where people are anymore, truly, honestly. I feel like people are there. I obviously has the most people there, but I think the online, like, computer gaming spaces become such as its own ecosystem as like, whatever. Like, yeah, you guys have that right now.

We'll get it eventually. We don't care enough about that right now. I think the issue is that like a lot of the numbers on that front are very, they're very mislead. Like, I would assume, I would have assumed that there would, there would be more people on Steam and on PC than console, but it's actually like no.

I don't think it is. I don't think it is. Like I like, it's not even close. And I'm just like, that's kind of surprising to me where I'm just like, because I would just intrinsically assume that because like who doesn't have a computer. Um, who hasn't just like, who hasn't just like, even just tangentially downloaded steam. Um, it just seems like the, the bar of entries like so low that like, why wouldn't you just

be on PC in some way? But like, I think a lot of people are still intimidated for some reason. Maybe. They think that like, I. It's a transformation that is like no other. It's crazy. I'm like, what do you do with you? Like, just fucking do it already.

One of my old co-worker homies has got a PC and he was like, I'm never going back. Like, I'm not, it's insane. Like, why to fuck would I ever play games on console again? And I'm like, I don't know, maybe you enjoy Pokemon. But other than that, there's like genuinely no reason going back like going back there. Every time I have that feeling, I'm prompted by a driver installation window and then I remember. I remember exactly. I'm like,

okay, this is why. Yeah. I hate that. I hate that. I usually just be like, no. No,

but if I do know, then the game doesn't work, and then I have to go in and do it. Like, it's, it's, it is, there is a level of,

it's like a little, just slightly too much effort on, it's like if my fridge had to do that. If I had to go like, hey, um, it's Tuesday.

Uh, open up the back of your fridge and tweak some settings on your fridge. I'm just like, can't you just keep this cold? Can you just keep my my food cold for me? Do I really need to, to tailor you specifically? It's like, it is kind of annoying. I understand people don't want to use the consoles. I get it. Like my brain can wrap my head around. It's the thing. That's the means. Well, yes. Yes. I can understand people don't want to use PCs. I get like the idea where it's like, it's just like it's a lot of money and like it's a new ecosystem because I was that person for a while. I was a person for a long while. Then I got a PC and I'm like,

just don't, I don't understand the way you can navigate games and modify them yourself easily. Dude, the skins I have on Street Fighter 6 are hilarious. Yeah, I bet. Not even the sex ones. There's a lot of sex ones. Don't get me wrong. There's way too many nude ones. Like, I can't open that around anyone I know.

They'll have a lot of questions. But it's, it's, it's, it's just like, it's so much easier to play the game, so much better. the modding space is generally the part where it just it just takes it away. Unfortunately, all that stuff isn't intuitive to like the average gamer. So I think that's like it is. No, it's not intuitive. They don't have any experience. They can figure it out.

They could. There is the issue. There is the issue of just things breaking. Like there's games that I own on Steam where I like I try to, I boot them up. And it's just like, oh, this just doesn't work. Like Splensoil Blacklist doesn't work because it's just too old. But if I boot it up on a console, it works. because it's just like, oh, well, this, it's built for this.

So it's like, there is that level of like, I don't know. I think it's a tricky kind of balance. I think if you want, if you want to be able to like modify the shit out of your games and tweak the shit out of your games, like obviously you should be on PC. Majority of people don't give a shit about that. Like, and you know how I know that is because like I are, dude, dude, it blew my mind how many, like there was like a stat. I can't remember exactly what it was.

Somebody could fact check it in the, in the, audience, but there was like some report that was done or like some article that was written about like how many people choose performance mode over quality mode. So like the 30 frames per second mode over the 60 frames per second mode and vice versa. The majority of people, the majority of people play at 30 frames. They don't care. That's crazy. By by like an insane margin. Yeah. That's crazy. They're not competitive. 80. 20. No, I know. I've overdone it. I've over done it. And now I'm at like 180 on base for pretty much everything. It used to have it. If you If you are not used to, it's hard to go back, right?

It's hard to go back. It only works in cinema. Like, say in cinema, you need certain things to be at certain frames, especially action scenes. It looks fucking weird if it's like 60 or above. Like, you want to be like 24. It looks fucking crazy. Too smooth.

You're like, what the hell's happening? People when they watch the Hobbit series, like, fucking they were freaking out. They're like, what the fuck is going on? Because everything was like 60 or something. But no, it was like, it was 48. You remember it? 48. I remember it was something like, yeah.

frames a second. There's something like higher than normal. People were like, what the fuck's going on? But yeah, like now try going back, especially a lot of people play on average like around like 120 or something. Now it,

it's your eyes. My shit was lagging when I was trying to play, Assassin's Creed Shadows. It wasn't like, you know, because you play or whatever, you, you soft connect or whatever the fuck it is now.

It's still awful. And it was just weird trying to play at the, I was trying to play the high settings. I don't have the best rig right now. and it was like at 30 and I was like, this is, my eyes hurt. Like, it just feels weird.

I was like, what the fuck's going on? But like, yeah, if you're used to playing like that, people, they don't even notice. It was the same thing. Do you know,

people, their eyes, well, they don't notice anything to the point where all of those new fucking TVs, all those new TVs would have motion smoothing on

by default. And people, I would talk to them. They're like, I don't, I don't know, I don't know what you're talking about. And I'm like, how do you not notice this?

I'm like, how do you not see that this, it looks like a soap opera now compared to you? Like, this scene's supposed to be dark and gritty. And now it just looks like everyone's like, you know, I'm like walking around. Like, bro, what the, like, how do you not notice this? So like when you say most people play in performance, one, I'm like, I'm not even remotely surprised. They're like, I don't even notice there was a difference. I'm like, hello, hello. I'm Malcolm Gladwell, host of Smart Talks with IBM.

I recently spoke with IBM's new director of research, Jake M. Beta. We discussed his vision for the future of quantum computing. At IBM research, what we always do is answer what is the future of computing, whether it's coming up with new algorithms, coming up with better AI, coming up with quantum, or coming up with just how do different accelerators go together. It's our DNA to answer the question of what is the future. Isn't it a perfect problem for IBM because you kind of need to, to have a legacy of building stuff,

building actual physical machines. Yeah, it's why I came to IBM. I wanted the experience, the culture of building hard things that others have not done before. Where do you imagine we are in the timeline of this technology? There will come a point when it will mature. My cell phone is a mature technology at this point. How far are we from that point?

with quantum. By 2029, we'll build the first fault-tolerant quantum computer. That is one that can run a very, very large, large problem. To learn how IBM is building the future of computing, visit IBM.com slash quantum. Hey, it's Ryan Sechrest for Albertsons and Safeway. Ready to save, it's time for cyber deals. Put a spring in your step with fresh savings that brighten the season. These exclusive week-long digital offers on your favorite products are only available when you should. shop online. Save on eligible items from Kettle, Chabani, Quaker, Skippy, Hidden Valley, International Delight,

and Signature Select. Available now through March 24th on pickup or delivery orders only. Restrictions apply. See website for full terms and conditions. Oh. I didn't know if I was getting shot in the back for three hours straight. I wasn't aware of that. I wasn't aware of somebody was slowly carving my back up like a turkey. I couldn't even tell you how many times I went over to

somebody's house and played video games on their TV and I just remember being like, what the fuck is wrong with this? What's happening? And I would have to go into the settings and like I turn on game mode, the thing that like decreased the latency. So like there was like no post processing on the on the feed. And then they were like, whoa, what did you do? This is, this feels amazing. And I'm like, oh. Yeah, it's the fucking it's a there are people there are people out there who have only played video games on a delay. Yeah. I felt the difference where I was playing a, I played a 2K

game on a, on a, on a, on a, on a TV. And the latency was like, let's say this, to green to have a perfect shot, right? You want your meter to be like all the way up to, to get it, you had to essentially release half before it would actually fill up. It was, It was so weird that I was like, oh, people are playing, they've never experienced like low latency. They don't know what that fucking feels like.

They never knew about the real world. They don't know about the real existence of games. People are playing action like first. People are playing call of duty on a delay. People are playing destiny on a delay. And they're playing well. And they're acclimated to it. They've learned how to play wrong.

They've learned how to play wrong. That is so crazy to me. Because without me, without me, I promise, I swear to God, if I hadn't gone over to those people's houses, no one would have done that. I just know the people, I know who they are, I know who their friends were and already are. They're also nerds. They would have noticed this. They would have fixed it if they knew. And so that blows my mind.

He was just suffering. They were just suffering. Like, oh, that seems fine. It was Jalen was one of those people too. I went and fixed it for Jalen. Now Jalen notices. Now he notices, yeah. But it's like,

it's not a big deal. Yeah, it's pretty wild. Yeah. It's a little sad, but, you know, it is what it is. That is the average person's just not, they're just doing, right? They're not really thinking about shit. They're just doing shit.

They're just existing. Every person does exist. They're not really doing anything other than being. They're not even being. Like, oh, this is just how it is. You know, you turn it on. Like, no, that's how it used to be back in the day. when you had a CRTV it was just it just existed there weren't extra settings to play with you just fucking right being alive is kind of just suffering you know like that's all it is i remember being a kid i remember being a kid and looking at it's so funny looking at options menus and like um PS1 games or whatever because it's just like what even what even it was always like two options it was always like brightness and like credits or something like you know what I mean like it was just like nothing nothing in that options menu at all yeah so it's fucking

hilarious. Good times, man. Yeah. Now it's like, do you want FSSR or whatever? And I'm like, I don't even know what happened. Like, tessellation? I'm like, I don't. Huh? What'd you call me?

Chromatic aberration. What did you call me? What is chromatic aberration? I still don't fully know. What's an aberration? I think I have a vague concept of what I know what an aberration is. I don't know what a chromatic aberration is.

You know what a chromatic aberration? Chrome Magnus. You know what's crazy? If I showed you, if I showed you what chromatic aberration is and I like, if I showed you real time like slider down and up, you would obviously see something change and you I wouldn't be able to describe it. You would not have the vocabulary to under to explain what it is that you're seeing. You'd be like I, something's different.

I agree with that. It looks more different. I agree with that. I've, uh, there are definitely settings. that I've tweaked and I'm like, I'm not exactly sure what this is doing. I'm not sure if it's better or not. And then sometimes I'll just, okay, I'll just leave this on default because it's like, it's funny because it's a few, you, you're so stupid. You can see change. You can't describe it. It's crazy. Like, you can see it. You can see something's changing. But they're like,

what's happening? Sometimes you have to be thoroughly explained to where you fully grasp what is happening. You're like, oh, I get it now. But on it on your own, I'm like, some things are strings, you know, so you've got to describe the basics first. You're like, I can't, you can't inform somebody of what calculus is that's never seen it without going through what trigonometry. And then before trigonometry, what algebra is, you know, like you can't, you can't get to the final part because it's so much that goes on with it. You need help, but you're like, uh, I don't know how to get there, man. I've always no calculus, we've time by, man.

Oh, interesting. Yeah, came out of the room and I was like. The what room? Uh, the womb, excuse me. Uh, came out of the room and the womb. You don't even know word calculus. So language? Yeah.

Yeah, me no good at language times some. Oh, here's, so here's a good, uh, we'll just move on to questions, by the way. Let's do it, I guess. Let's go, uh, uh, We're going to go over to our questions from our patrons over at patreon.com slash a snark tank. Remember, you can go over there. Add free, ad free early episodes, exclusive episodes, yada, yada, yada, yada. Forget about it.

Snark tank, snarktank.shop for merch. Thermis Grenadine wrote in. He says, hello, Beast Boy, Cyborg, and Boy Wonder. I'm posting this again because it was like in last month's thread, but was never dyslexically read by Chris. That's probably true. This is for, this is for Kingston. Okay, one second. what are you doing are you

I'm grabbing something when something fell what are you pulling a totem pole out of your ass what are you doing that's insane that would I'd be digging more like this that's crazy fucking

fucking whole ass wahakin totem pole out my fucking ass why was that the first thought I don't know okay hit me I was trying to think of something comically big and long

It's the first thing that I thought of total. Anyway, he says, this is for Kingston. Did you know that if you Google your name, a New York Times article shows up from 2005 about the time of your infamous train mixup? I know. It's hilarious reading it, knowing the context of you and what happened. It also talks about how a year prior, the police had come to rescue you off the fire escape because you climbed down and got scared.

What? My question for you, after all this, is why are you like this? I hate that that's real. Oh, my God. I hate you read that too. Now that's out there. What? I didn't know about this.

It's lore. It's old lore. You knew about the, what you call it, the train thing? I know what the train thing is. I didn't know about. So embarrassing. Oh, my God. There's actual.

I was. Go ahead, please. I was a nefarious youngster. I was a nefarious youngster. I had a nefarious behaviors and, and exhibited nefarious acts. You really like the word nefarious right now. Yeah, because I am nefarious.

It was, it's, it's, how'd I explain? Okay, I lived, I lived, so there was one time when I was, went to my visit my friend in Brooklyn, and ended up staying over at his house about telling my grandma.

So, because I was a dumb kid, my grandma was like, oh, you lived in the Bronx and, you know, living in the Bronx, she was like,

oh, well, my son's been abducted and sent to fucking Alcatraz to be a fucking sharecropper. I got to figure out, where he is. So she called the police. I ended up coming back home the next day. And I was like, hey, what's going on? Everybody was like so fucking mad. I was a dumb kid. I was a really, truly stupid kid. Another time I was coming out of my houses, I was like, I want to climb down my fires. I want to see what's when I get down it. I was fucking exploring being dumb. I went on

a fire escape and then got stuck. The thing was up. The gate was up all the way. And I was a little kid. So that drop would have definitely really badly hurt me. So I was kind of stunned locked. and the police came and he helped me down. It's really embarrassing. That's wild, dude. Really embarrassing, but it's, you used to be, you used to be stupid. Used to be. It's interesting.

Yeah. Yeah, you still are, but you used to do. Curious. I was, I was definitely dumb. There's like a physical newspaper with this in there? Not anymore. I had it. Oh, man.

Had it. It's probably old to the point where it started because that was, that was in, It's like the Declaration of Independence For like a I was in I was in two I was Man I'm trying to think I think I was a sixth grade

So I was like 11 12 Dang it That's not that long ago 18 years 18 19 years ago Probably like 1976 Yeah

Yeah Yeah Yeah Or 2005 or six But yeah Oh, close enough. Give it take 30 years.

Let's take 30 years. Let's see. Kingston. Don't look it up. I hate this. Charlie Kirk lost a gun debate road and he says, yo, you big gay fellows,

once I flooded a subway and just quit on the spot because I didn't want to deal with it. You all ever do something similar? So first of all, that's crazy. Yeah. I got to be honest.

when you first said I flooded a subway, I immediately thought like a subway station. I sort of thought that too, but I was like, that's stupid. But that would be like, that's insane. That's actually like a why. That's probably a felony. Hey, yo, hold up. One sec. One sec.

The title of the article. Boy. Boy, or some shit. Ten. Hello, hello. I'm Malcolm Gladwell, host of the podcast Smart Talks with IBM. I recently sat down with IBM's chairman and CEO, Arvin Krishna. And I asked him, how can companies,

use AI to its fullest potential to create smarter business. My one advice to them, pick areas you can scale. Don't pick the shiny little toys on the side. For example. If anybody has more than 10% of what they had for customer service 10 years ago, they're already five years behind it. If anybody is not using AI to make their developers, who write software 30% more productive today

with the goal of being 70% more productive. Yeah, wow. So we are not asking our clients to be the first experiment on it. We say, you can leverage what we did. We're happy to bring out all our learnings, including what needs to change in the process, because the biggest change is not technology,

is getting people to accept that there's a different way to do things. To listen to the full conversation, visit IBM.com slash Smart Talks. Hey, it's Ryan Sechrest for Albertsons and Safeway. It's stock up savings time now through March 31st. Spring in for store-wide deals and earn four times the points.

Look for in-store tags to earn on eligible items from Celsius, body armor, or Ida, silk, Capri-Sung, Bavarian Meets, and Charmin. Then clip the offer in the app for automatic event-long savings. Stack up those rewards to save even more. Enjoy savings on top of savings when you shop in-store or online for easy drive-up and go pick-up or delivery. apply see website for full terms and conditions missing in the bronx a second child returns home what there was another there was another kid that went missing around the same time they assumed to

i remember that story that's crazy cringe oh my god you were in the new york times dude what the i was i was that's two of us in new york town there you gotta get your weight up uh yeah yeah you haven't been there yet yeah what i don't i don't i don't know to maybe they don't put Cali niggas in New York Times. This doesn't happen. That's true. Y'all don't matter enough.

Oh, that's crazy. I got to do something stupid. What should I do? I don't know. Go to New York and blow up a fucking city block. A fuck! A New York City block is such an insane amount of that's such a wild distance.

Yeah, do it. That is, I think I will be. like been allowed in tenfold if I if I pull that off. Okay. And do it at nighttime. People are definitely at home sleeping. Okay.

Okay. And. Oh man. Okay. And is such a crazy. I was talking about this to Lily, right? I was like Lily, she was,

I was really talking about boxing. Lily, Lily has this dumb perspective where she cannot admit that Floyd Mayweather is probably the greatest boxer ever. I know who that is. And she's like, that's not true. I don't believe it.

And I was like, you know what? Why don't more people kill each other in the ring and box. Like, why don't more people just beat each other out of life in boxing? And she was like, that's terrible. And I was like, yeah, but it would be entertaining for sure. If like a few fucking brutal hits a throne and somebody gets it and you're like, well,

good night. Is that what you want? I'd watch it. I'd watch it at least once. I don't want to. That's, I draw the lionette wanting to see people get beaten to death. I'd watch it at least once. Dead.

It'd be interesting. to see, it'd be like, oh, shit. Oh, shit. Damn. That guy got hit so hard, he passed away. Anyway, young fly, by the way, pleo TCA wrote in about like, oh, yeah, yeah. Plio TCA wrote in about the state of Microsoft.

Do you think it's over for the console? We talked extensively about it. I didn't see your question in time. Do you think it's over for your mom? It's crazy for no reason. What if their mom's like a bad shape or something? It's a violent question. that's fucking crazy. I'm sorry, that's not funny at all.

That was fucked up. Young fly on the track road in. He says, hey there, you deeply closeted straight boys. I recently got the Callisto Protocol when it was on a massive sale. And it's actually better than I expected. Far from perfect or anywhere near as good as Dead Space. But a fun time. Do you have any bargain bin recommendations as in games you'd recommend when they're on sale?

That's an excellent question. It's a great question. I feel like I play all. lot of these. That's, that is my existence. Yeah. I never regret it. I, like, typically, like, I, I, I haven't regretted playing a video game in a while. Like, a lot of the games that I play are pretty good, but, like, they're definitely like, ah, wait, you know, I think, I'll give you, I'll give you, I'll give you a few right now, okay, so. So, if you haven't played, oh, go ahead, sorry, I did, oh, right, glad, glad, what, do you think? Are you, are you, are you ready? Are you ready?

No, go ahead. I have a few, but, like, go ahead, just do your thing, is you already going to talk. Oh, no, okay. Well, I was, I was just, like, I was just too off the top of my head is, Harry Potter is dirt cheap right now It is fucking you can get the new Harry Potter the Hogwarts game sorry Oh Hogwarts Legacy is Piss cheap right now Perfect time if you haven't played it If you thought about like I've never really cared about Harry Potter

But like this is a perfect time to get it A Dragon's Dogma 2 is like 20 bucks now or something Where before I was like don't fucking play 20 bucks is is a good experience for $20 And it's it's solid You know like it's wouldn't pay more for $20. Yeah.

So I got those two off the top of my head. Yeah. I have for one game, Death Store. It's a Zelda S game. Really, really, really, really fun. Oh, that's there's really good. Dirt cheap.

Dirt fucking cheap. Divinity Original Sin 2. Another one should play. Very dirt cheap. And another game that I thought wouldn't be, that would cost more. But Hades 2 is not very expensive. It's like $30, I think.

Yeah, that sounds about right. I thought they were more expensive than that. About $30 fucking pitch cheap game. Good grab. Yeah, so I mean, this technically isn't. So I don't know how to necessarily answer this. Because there are games that are cheap right now. I don't really know.

I have to kind of keep current with a lot of stuff that I play. So a lot of stuff I buy kind of at full price. But there are games that I can tell where I'm just like, this is good for later. and one of those is Hell as Us is is very cool Hell of Us is very is very cool

It's very weird So Hells Us is like really new It's like It's uh It's Souls-ish But it's actually more like a 360 action game Than like a modern Souls game But the core conceit is that there's

There's no map And there's no like markers or anything You have to actually like listen to like The conversations that you have And like they'll tell you like Oh there's something to the north of this place. And then when you find that place, you check your compass and you go north.

And then you find it. It's cool. And I would absolutely recommend that at like a lower price point. Yeah. We're like 20 bucks or something. I think it's like a really solid, solid get. I heard really good things about that new dead space kind of, what the fuck is it? Chronos and New Dawn, I think is what it's called for really good things about that.

Borderlands is kind of that where I'm at too. Borderlands 4 is great, but it's like the performance on it is so weird and like unreliable and like there's like that whole memory league issue. It's like kind of unstable, but it's a really good game. So that's one that I would recommend like maybe when the price goes down. You know, checking that out.

There's a ton like, yeah, I mean, it's a great question. There's a lot. I feel like most games that come out now. It's weird. Like I feel like there's a lot of negativity in the game space because it's like everybody's just like obviously that's what sells or whatever but I feel like most games that I play are I haven't played a bad game in a very long time

like a truly like bad piece of shit game like I'm not buying those games like I'm not buying a game as a piece of shit well right but that's the thing it's like sometimes you would come across like sometimes like you'd get it from like maybe like a grandmother Christmas would buy you something and she wouldn't really know what what like she doesn't she's not on IG bro that's like she's like she's I yes Yes That's my experience anyway

Was that like I remember getting a game called search and destroy Or seek and destroy It was a tank combat game You played as tanks And it just sucked Everything about it was just fucking garbage And I really hated it But that was like the last time

Every game that I play now Like any game of any consequences Like I feel like It's very rare that a game is like less than a 7 out of 10 you know, in my experience. Like, Immortals of Avium is another one. Like, that was like a magic shooter that EA made. Oh, yeah.

That was really good. Like, that was like surprisingly pretty good. That game is fun. That's a good one because that game, particularly on Steam will go on sale for like, I think sometimes even like, like $10 or under or something. Like something ridiculous. Like, the last time I saw it, it's a steal for that.

Yeah. I haven't bought a game in a while. Well, no. I haven't bought until like up until like last month. I didn't buy a game for a while. while. Then I just bought like six games. So I was like, wow. Fuck me. I got to buy two more because Lily really wants Pokemon.

I think that comes out Friday. So the new Digimon game. That game is so good. I'm so surprised I'm saying a Digimon video game is good. I'm not surprised that you're saying that at all. I'm surprised. I don't play I don't play games. I don't really play Monster Catcher games anymore.

Yeah. And I was already, I was like, oh, it's going to be fine. But no, it's actually like a very solid JRP. monster catching game. Like, I feel like it's better. I feel like it's better than persona. I'm watching gameplay footage. That's crazy.

I'm watching gameplay footage of it right now. If I get plays better than persona does actually. Yeah, it looks like total shit. But like, I mean, that's crazy. God bless. I mean, it's like, you're not the person to ask about those games. It's like asking, it's like asking me about like, I don't know, fucking mobile game. It's like, nigga, you're asking a worst guy ever.

Like, what are you talking about? Yeah, yeah. It's like man You know any quality mobile game It's like I don't know Fucking Fruit Ninja was cool When I was 13 Fruit Ninja

Fruit Ninja is crazy Hmm Oh Remnant 2 is $20 right now on Steam Yeah there you go I bought yeah I bought Remnant 2 for dirt cheap A while ago yeah Yeah Remnant 2's a great one

There's so many There's a lot of great titles For like really cheap Outer Wilds is $15 I keep hearing about that I have it I just haven't I haven't got around to it. Yeah, same.

Yeah, I'm always worried that like a game like that I'm not going to be bad into. And so I'm just like, maybe I'll just wait until I'm Damn, a lot of dirt, cheap, fucking good games. Like Risk of Rain 2's fucking, what is this? Cheap. High on life is 20 bucks. I think 20 bucks is a great price for high on life. That's like that comedy game by the working Morty guys.

Go see Chishmas, $40. Yeah, I don't know. This is a great question. There's like a ton. Colissa Protocol was one of those games, though, for sure. Like, I remember being like, I could, like, this is not great, but like there's not nothing here. Like, I felt like that game could have... Hello, hello. I'm Malcolm Gladwell, host of Smart Talks with IBM. I recently spoke with IBM's new director of research, Jake Gambata.

We discussed his vision for the future of quantum computing. At IBM Research, what we always do is answer what is the future of computing, whether it's coming up with new algorithms, coming up with better AI, coming up with quantum, or coming up with just how do different accelerators go together. It's our DNA to answer the question of what is the future. Isn't it a perfect problem for IBM because you kind of need to have a legacy of building stuff? Yes. Building actual physical machines.

Yeah, it's why I came to IBM. I wanted the experience, the culture of building, hard things that others have not done before. Where do you imagine we are in the timeline of this technology? There will come a point when it will mature. Right? Yeah. My cell phone is a mature technology at this point.

How far are we from that point with Conton? By 2029, we'll build the first fault-tolerant quantum computer. That is one that can run a very, very large, large problem. To learn how IBM is building the future of computing, visit IBM.com slash quantum. Hey, it's Ryan Seacrest for Albertsons and Safeway. It's stock up savings time now through March 31st.

Spring in for store-wide deals and earn four times of points. Look for in-store tags to earn on eligible items from Celsius, body armor, or aida, silk, Capri-Sun, Bavarian Meets, and Charmin. Then clip the offer in the app for automatic event-long savings. Stack up those rewards to save even more. Enjoy savings on top of savings when you shop in-store or online for easy, drive up and go pick up or delivery. Restrictions apply. See website for full

terms and conditions. Like they could have taken that and turned it into a better foundation or like they could have turned it into something cooler later on but they just spent so much money building it that like they just lost it just wasn't. It just didn't make any sense. The game was like hundreds of millions of dollars and it's just like that does not come through man. Yeah, that's unfortunate.

It does not it feel like it's that expensive at all. $100 million. Oh, two games because maybe a lot of people haven't played them these are older games that I always usually on like so CD Keys is now loaded.com they change their name but like same shit like you can go on Green Man gaming

or wherever the fuck you want to go but if you ever come across like the the the like Shadow Mordor Shadow War those games are always like a dollar or two now like you go out of like two bucks and those games are so fucking fun and oh yeah one that was like

in the same way that I talk about X-Men Ordens Wolverine where it was like surprisingly like a really fucking fun game. The Mad Max game, which is always like a dollar now too. It's usually like a dollar or two. I had so much fun playing that game. And so there's a lot of people that skipped over it because they're like, I'm not fucking playing on Mad Max game. We give the shit.

Dude, I heard a lot of people talking, talking good stuff about that Mad Max game. It's fun because, hey, I never got around to it. Survival fucking bullshit, a apocalyptic thing where there's some annoying shit like running out of gas, it's fucking annoying shit like that. But then it's just,

it's like rock steady just beat the fuck out of people same type of it you know rock steady really just changed the game dude like people are just like just do that they're like oh do that yeah do that type of mechanics dude and i'm like just beat the dog shit out of people because like they really invented they really invented an entire like subgenre of like combat it's kind of crazy yeah they really did because even talking about fucking uh shadow uh a wardour it's the same thing you are a blight I think you're the bad guy in those games, honestly. Well, I mean, you want the cunty elf, so he's kind of a... For like, Tangible's land.

But the amount of orcs you kill is up in that game. Hey, they're attacking me, bro. Like, I'm trying to get... I got like a 500 hit combo one time. I was just beating him. I was just beating on them. I wouldn't even kill them. I would chase him.

I'd let him run and I'd fucking run after them. And just be in the shadow, shooting them in the legs. And you pin them to the floor and they're scared. then you walk up to them and you put your hand on their head and you make them re-count their sins and then you let them go terrifying they're broken you can break their spirits it's fucking insane oh you know what i've heard good things about this uh this megabunk game i haven't heard about it it's like it's like it's like ten dollars megabunk that's like so you know vampire survivors yeah it's like that but 3d basically okay so it's like it's like 3d vampire survivors you can

jump and like so there's like additional modifiers because it's 3d so like oh you get like a skill where it's like you do more damage in the air or whatever but like the premise is the same where it's just like you're kind of going around and I think your attacks automatically happen on like a timer and you just have to like time things well and build your kit it looks like shit it looks like it's funny because like it looks it's like vampire survivors I guess in that sense where it's just like this looks like kind of like a low grade 2d game this looks like kind of like a low grade 3d game, but it is apparently very fun. Yeah.

Yeah. I haven't actually played it yet. Have you guys, have you guys been watching Peacemaker? I've not, no, I, not yet. What was it? It's so good. It's so ins- Peacemaker.

The freedom they gave him with that character in that world, it's so unfortunate. They're not going to give him that for anything else, unfortunately. Because, yeah, because he really made. You know, he's the head, right? I mean, yeah, but I'm sure the exact is going to be like, you can't do this shit with everybody else. Like, you can't have this in other universes. I, I mean, he's the head. I don't see why.

Because it's still, it's still like people above him that are like, because he's the leader of, he's the head of the, uh, the greater DC universe. But I'm sure the reason why people came out the way it did is because he was allowed to write a script that he wanted to before all the money got funneled right back into it after Superman, all that shit, you know. But they're like, you can only go so far, unfortunately. She's saying WB is going to eventually fucking do what they normally do. Of course. Of course. They did with fucking Andor. Andor did a really good job.

And now Disney, I'm glad it ended. They like, it's all like, Disney's not going to be like, oh man, let me come. He's like,

no, it's over. You can't do anything. It's done. You can't touch it anymore. What if they do an Andor sequel anyway? That would kill me because he's dead. That would break my heart because he's dead.

Yeah, but like, dead. That'd be still bad. Yoda died, but he came back. is like a spectre as a little hologram.

Yeah, but he's a force wielder. Andor's just a space Mexican. He is. He's literally a space Mexican. That's true. This it is, man. Where's my space freeoles? He was like,

oh yeah, me, I'mo andor. Vilares lucion. I'm a rebel. Don't they're lutein, for favor. My space freeholes. I mean, it's so fucking outrageous.

to get them beans, man. Shout out to Diego Luna, bro. I want some black beans right now, actually. That's interesting. Black bean. That's what my kid will be. That's crazy. You're just going to call him that, too.

He's got to fucking. I'm not going to call my kid that. A little black bean, go clean your room. Oh, you know what? I'm going to try to have my kid be as not mixing as possible. I want them to be so detached of Mexican culture. It's hilarious. That's insane.

Shout out to this. This is, this is mega specific. But a way out. So like that co-op game was by the guys The guys who did Oh my God It takes two and uh split fiction most recently

I haven't played split fiction I heard it was it seems awesome But yeah I just not have the time Yeah I'm playing with anybody with the fuck So a way out that game on PlayStation right now is $5 I'm gonna buy that And that's a pretty That's a good I need to finish that

It was the first game that I started playing with Jojo That we never got back back around to it. I want to play. I couldn't get into it because like I just I was like that guy's got a big nose. I don't like it. That's crazy. Chris, you also have a big nose. Alien isolation also alien isolation seven bucks. That's a that's a good that's a good that's a good one. That's a good one. I still got to I have it. I, I got to play these. I have so my backalog is fucking ridiculous. I, um, yeah, I'm, I'm, I'm back on that. Well, that's not true. I just put it. I just plugged in my 360. I was going to say. I was like, all up to it. My back. Like, no, I'm not. No, I'm not. I'm literally, I would like to. I popped in Dragon Age 2 just to see like, because I wanted to see, I haven't played in. I didn't even play because it wasn't running well on my PC for whatever reason. Because I wanted to play it all before I did the, uh, the new one, the Vilgard. And I skipped it because I was like, I know it's the one that's the weakest one because of the time constraints and blah, blah, blah. But parts of it, I completely forgot about. I just don't remember. So I'm like, you know, I want to refresh my memory with the character. and shit like that. And again, like I said,

it looks fucking good on the 360 right now. I'm just, I'm just really surprised by that shit. Like, I don't know. I'm just weirded up by that. But, uh,

yeah, it's weird. Those games, that, that, I'm, I said it for a while, but like,

obviously things got better looking after the 360, undoubtedly. Yeah. But I, I also feel like when the 360 happened, I remember feeling like, yeah, this is about as,

this is about as much as I need, really. Yeah. Like, this is, I'm kind of good. Like even if we stayed there and just kind of got like better frame rates

and whatever like I was like yeah this is fine. And it's it's crazy because like I remember like just before I canceled game pass because we didn't even talk about that but like they raise they raise the prices of everything. So like they're they're what is it they tried to charge $80 for the Auto Worlds

too I think I remember they raise the prices of their machines to $650. Just fucking outrageous. And they raise the price of game pass at $30 a month. Which, look, man,

I'm not even going to say that, like, there's an argument, there's an argument to be made that if you really are, like, a player of games, like, you'd probably get a lot of value at a game pass even at $60 a month.

The issue, though, is that once you cross into the first, threshold of like 30 bucks a month. You're not really, you're not competing with other like streaming services. You're not competing with like Netflix and like Hulu and HBO. Now you're competing with like gym memberships.

Yep. You know what I mean? Like things that you look at and you're like, oh, that money probably would be better served going to something completely different. Yeah. It's at a point where you have to now, you really want to make the, even, you want to make the decision. There's two ways to look at it.

You want to make the decision of this could be either two subscriptions to something else or like you said, gym membership, which is my gym membership is 30 bucks a month. So it's a great analogy. And so it's like, okay, me on principle, because so it was 12 bucks a month for PC. And I thought that's like, what a fun. That's fucking amazing. Of course, I'll do this. I've only jumped on the train recently.

And then all of a sudden now it's like 16 something. 1650 or some shit like that or whatever it is. And I was like, ah, no. It's, it's, it's just the principality that like, the normal business practice in capitalism is to boil the frog. So you really up it by a buck. And then the next year or a couple of years, you slowly, we know what's happening, but you're giving us an ample amount of time to make a decision if I want to stay with this or not.

The 50% jump, the 30% percent jump, It's like, bro, no, I can't do it. It's crazy. It's a good. I've been subscribed to GamePest for a while, and there have been months where I didn't use it, but I was like, yeah. 100%. But like, 30 bucks is like, no, I'm going to notice that.

Like, that's, that's, I can't do this. But before I canceled it, I went up and I tried some of the stuff that was out. And there was a new trials game. Do you guys remember trials? It was the, um, the motorcycle game, like the 2D motorcycle game where it would like, you'd like do, it was like physics led and it was like a bunch of tricks and shit. I played the most recent one of that because they like they had one that came out I think super recently. I was like, oh, shit.

What the fuck is a new trial? And I was playing it and I was like, oh, this is cool. This is nice. I forgot about trials and like this is fun. But I was looking at it and I was like, this looks though about how I remember it looking. Like this looks basically like how I remember the 360 version of the game looking. Like this is kind of the same. Like it's definitely, it definitely looks better.

Like I'm sure the resolution is higher. I'm sure all of these things are true. But like the experience that I'm getting is is fundamentally the same. Right. And that kind of just says it's like, yeah, the 360 is as as good as I really needed it to look. And everything else is just kind of like a bell and whistle, you know, at this point. Yeah. But I don't know.

30 bucks a month is so crazy. Okay. So Taco 2D wrote in. He says, did you all see Did he? Did you all see the ditty that all did he got was like four years of jail time? Yeah. He should be in mega prison in super hell. Well,

Yep. Well, hey, um, you know, thanks for writing in. Did you hear that Galane Maxwell, a trafficker is also in minimum security prison, basically club fed where she could just have a great time like at the fucking vacation. And Trump is now saying he's going to talk to the DOJ about possibly,

you know, just talk about pardoning her. Not saying he's going to do it, but I mean, why would you even, why would you, let, let, you know, do I need to say anymore? Why would you even entertain? Why would you even entertain the concept of doing that? It is so crazy, man. I wish her well. I wish her well, you know.

I wish her well. I'm like, okay. So, yeah, I'm not surprised that. I mean, there's O.J. Simpson, you know, he got off. This shit happens. celebrities, rich people can have easier things. It just sucks when, like, think about a, in Hollywood, Jared Leto is fine.

And everybody knows he's an extreme sex pest, weird cult leader guy. What bothers me so much is in Tron and Tron is one of my favorite fucking franchises. And it's him in it. It makes me so mad. Tron is one of your favorite franchise? I love Tron. I've never heard that before in my life, actually. I talk about Tron.

Why would I talk about Tron with you two? This nigga doesn't like anything and you're black. So that's crazy. Niggas don't like black people like fucking Tron, I guess, except for you, you fucking. I'm the only one.

I'm a special. I'm a unique. I'm a fucking, I'm a fucking pillar in my community. I'm the only one. Gotcha. I just feel like even in passing I've never heard. I've never even caught you talking about.

I talk up. I've talked about Daph Punk, Dap Punk's Tron album a lot of times, but no one's listened to it. It's a great fucking album. but no one is the one where they go Tron Tron, Tron, Tron, Tron, Tron

And that's the whole album right there you see That's it That's it You fucking got wow Chris did you make the album I'm yeah Did you help make the album? You were like in the room you were like you were like You were like 14 like yeah

Your dad punk Those are like fucking like 70 aren't they They are not young They are not young Their first album came out like what 92 Three and they were set Yeah they were 70 year old

years old then. Yeah, there were at least 3,000 then. So I can imagine how they are now. There's actually ancient, there's actually ancient images of hieroglyphics of them beside like fucking ancient kings and shit like that were dressed exactly the same. That'd be crazy. And like no one's talking about it. I'd be like, oh. No, no one's addressing it. It's like this is a pretty big elephant in the room. That's a type of that I would see that I'd be, I would like actually lose my mind over. Because I'd be like, what the fuck? Why? Jason, I have a. So I have a knock, knock, joke for you.

90, no, that's a live. Ignored it. Ignored it. Go ahead, tell the joke. I want to hear this. No, no, I have a knock, knock joke for you, but you have to start it. So, knock, knock. Who's there?

I don't know. That wasn't very good. Yeah. All right. God's least hungish trans girl. 97 was their first album. God's, God's least funny. Transgirl wrote in.

He says, hello boys. quick one here. This is so funny because given what we just talked about, like a couple of questions ago, but he was like, what has been your biggest disappointment with video games? Mine would be the Colisto Protocol. The game,

which I made the mistake of pre-ordering like a damn full. Yeah, pre-ordering is like that's kind of full price is not, it's not great for full price. Especially because I think it was 70. I don't even think it was like 60. Hello, hello. I'm Malcolm Gladwell,

host of Smart Talks with IBM. I recently spoke with IBM's new direct through a research, Jake Embatta, we discussed his vision for the future of quantum computing. At IBM research, what we always do is answer, what is the future of computing, whether it's coming up with new algorithms, coming up with better AI,

coming up with quantum, or coming up with just how do different accelerators go together. It's our DNA to answer the question of what is the future. Isn't it a perfect problem for IBM because you kind of need to have a legacy of building stuff? Yes. building actual physical machines. Yeah, it's why I came to IBM.

I wanted the experience, the culture of building hard things that others have not done before. Where do you imagine we are in the timeline of this technology? There will come a point when it will mature. Right? My cell phone is a mature technology at this point. How far are we from that point with Conton? By 2029,

will build the first fault-tolerant quantum computer. That is one that can run a very, very large, large problem. To learn how IBM is building the future of computing, visit IBM.com slash quantum. Hey, it's Ryan Seacrest for Albertsons and Safeway. It's stockup savings time now through March 31st. Spring in for store-wide deals and earn four times a points. Look for in-store tags to earn on eligible items from Celsius, body armor, Oira Ida, Silk, Capri-San, Bavarian Meets, and Charmin.

Then clip the offer in the app for automatic event-long savings. Stack up those rewards to save even more. Enjoy savings on top of savings when you shop in-store or online for easy drive-up and go pick-up or delivery. Restrictions apply. See website for full terms and conditions. But yours truly, again, man, like I don't know. I don't know if I'm more acclimated or if I just know what to expect. Well, I know what yours is.

Which one is mine? Is it not Vailgard? No, actually it's not. It's the, it's the D&D game. The D&D game was just the word and I forgot what it's called. What a fucking nerd. Oh, what was it? Oh, is it that weird D&D game that came out?

During COVID. Yeah, I remember that. Oh, yeah, the COVID version of D&D. Yeah, that sucked. That COVID game. That game was so bad. Dragons. That shit did so much damage.

made to that. I'm glad I'm glad BG3 like took the ball and like yammed it from half court but like from past court that's so crazy. Dungeons and Dragons Dungeons and Dragons Dark Alliance 20th I remember seeing like skill up

I think a skill up video about it or something like that like a bunch of people This is ass you nerd this is big ass you know Big ass is crazy I've met him he's quite nice But yes he does sound

He sounds wrong Seems like a nice guy you neer He goes like Oh I had to wrestle this I'd wrestle this video game Off of a spider That's crazy That's crazy

He's an Ozzy bloke You know That's how he talk He's cool He's a nice guy Yeah It was a plenty of nice guys I could have killed him. I could I could I could I could have killed him and I

it was crazy like I had the I had the chance to kill. Isn't that crazy? What is wrong with you? What is wrong with you? Oh my God. I had the chance to kill him. I could have taken it right. It's crazy how much were like I felt. I felt that way when I came across a Magic Johnson and I was like oh I can slit his throat right now.

I could just. You guys talk shit about me. I was literally talking about I want people to die in a ring and you guys are like, No, I don't think that's too more. I don't think that's very funny. And as you guys are like, I could have slaughtered this person if I wanted to. Because you're serious. No, I'm not.

This guy, from the guy that chants hate before he goes to sleep. I don't do that anymore. I've resolved that fucking character on it, bro. I don't do that. He used to sit in his bed chanting hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, and then he would do it so much that he would like hyperventilate and pass out and go to sleep. That was the only way he knew how to go to sleep.

I would go on. I would go under the cover so there's less oxygen. I would chant hate it fast as that couldn't until I pass out. Lillie just compartmentalizes that shit. Oh, he's so funny. Oh, he's so chill. He's so cool. Chant to I fucking get lightheaded and then I fucking phase out of existence.

So the question was the most disappointing? Most disappointed that you've been with a game, I guess. what was yours Chris I actually don't know like it's been a while probably hmm

vanilla no and vanilla Destiny 2 disappointed me but it wasn't like that crazy uh probably honestly

probably Halo 4 I think honestly like that was probably like because even 5 I was like I'm having fun with this like we played that for quite a while like everybody that that I was living with.

We played that for, and I would probably still play that today. If it was, if it was available on PC and whatever, like, I'd probably still play it every now and again. Because it is a good multiplayer video game, but like, I just remember being like, ah, this sucks, but it, it was just more suck. It was like, oh, this is bad again

versus like, oh, this is the first time this is bad. You know, that was disappointing. Yeah. But like, since then, I really don't know. Oh, no, you know what's? Obviously, what am I saying? The Massief collection. Oh, yeah. What am I even talking like that was i remember dude i remember going i went to a game stop me and jalen we we went we picked it up midnight i had the new console he didn't so we was like oh man all right let's let's

fuck with this let's let's play some games then we got home and then we tried to get this thing working until 4 30 in the morning and then we just gave up we were just like we're not going to play tonight i guess and that sticks out to me is just like man i don't think i've ever been more disappointed in my life about anything than that. There you go. Yeah. Because there was no reason. It's one thing about like Dragon Age where it's just like, okay, uh, this studio is making a new video game. There's like a chance it's

going to miss. But a collection of old games that were already working on hardware that should be able to handle it way better. Doesn't work on the launch day? Wild. that would be like if they had a re-release of fucking Casablanca and it didn't work not a remake

a re-release and you got the disc you get the disc for your 4K Blu-ray of Casablanca and it was just like it was just a JPEG of a clown fucking itself it's just like okay great this is not at all what I paid for or what I wanted

but that was that was 2014 though so it's been a while it's been a last one you kind of pushed it down a little bit until it like just reared its ugly head right now you're like Oh, yeah. I just, I genuinely forget,

because now the game works and it's, and it's good and whatever. But like, it's just like, dude, those are dark, those are dark fucking days, dude.

That is crazy. That's what you should have, anything. That is crazy. The moment you give yourself, ability to love, you fucking get disappointed, man.

Yeah. But yeah, I, I, I'm pretty sure, I guess, because you said the veil guard, um,

and it probably just by a little bit, because Indromeda was no endramida. It's endromeda for you. I don't know, man. It's, Because like, it's Andromeda, there's no way. As of right now, I was thinking about it.

Because the drama was newer. You weren't ready for that kind of disappointment yet. Vailgard is after Andromeda, so you've already been primed for it. So you're right in a sense. It's just you're right in a sense, but I'm thinking it's a, it's kind of a hard. I think, I think so since the, I, my X-Pax stations weren't incredibly high since it was a new, all new characters and all new cast. I already know it was going to be hard to Oh, are you going to have a better cast than the mass effect trilogy?

Like I don't think so Like that's just that's asking almost too much It needs to be on the surface or just a little bit under But it missed so hard So it was like as far as any of the characters They didn't really have any good characters in the Drameda They had like oh the the the the the Krogan was fine But just because he was kind of like an old Rex

So he was like kind of cool, but, you know what I'm saying? Why are the Krogans in Andromeda in the first place? Well, like, that's so lame. Why are they there? Well, because, like, every, you know, it's your crew. Like, everybody, everybody's there. All the arcs are supposed to show there, and they're supposed to, like, you know,

populate and drama and shit like that. A stupid fucking mission in the first place. It's like, you're going to colonize another fucking galaxy is kind of insane. It's an insane thought because they're like, it's, anyway. But the game had all of its issue. everybody remembers all the issues. That was a massive disappointment, sure. I think why the Vail Guard just inches it out for me.

Because even like, because I'm thinking about the combat and Enjomeda, like that was actually kind of fun. There was one redeeming thing about that. And when I'm really thinking about the Vail Guard, and I'm like trying to be nice about it. And I was like, well, damn, like, it looks stupid.

It, uh, the character sucked. The combat, wasn't what I was looking for, you know, even though the combat in another game would have been fine. Actually would have been like, this is pretty fun for a different game. I just, I can't really, I was like, damn, it's still, let's put it this way. Maybe it's because it's still kind of fresh, but I don't remember feeling depressed playing Indromeda. I think that's kind of the difference for me. I remember being disappointed and like, this is fucking bullshit.

But I'm actually, I feel a little hurt still. when I think about the bill. Well, there's also the thing, too, is that it's like, you fucked up with Anthem and then you fucked, or you fucked up with Andromeda, then you fucked up with Anthem. You fucked up three times in a row, dude.

Like people, people been, you know, people been unkind to all sorts of studios, right? Bungy right now is getting a lot of flack, obviously for like a myriad of reasons. This shit in the bed over and over again. Just shit in the bed. shit the bed. They're managing to shit the bed and then shit the floor and then shit the house.

Right. But their last big thing was the, what is it? What the fuck was that last expansion? Final shape or whatever? Final shape, yeah. And that was, people loved it. I thought it was great. And so, and so imagine like, I don't know.

I just think about it. It's just like people have a hard time with bungee right now after their last. thing was pretty good and they're just kind of like fumbling the delivery and and you know marathon's kind of in a weird spot that's one with biow where you had two in a row and then you're like all right maybe maybe this is the one right after like 10 years or whatever and it's still a mess yeah that's crazy like that's i see what you're saying where it's like that would be that would be way worse because at least with andromeda it was just like oh well this is this is not great and there's a lot wrong with this hello hello i'm malcolm gladwell host of the podcast

smart talks with IBM. I recently sat down with IBM's chairman and CEO, Arvin Krishna, and I asked him, how can companies use AI to its fullest potential to create smarter business? My one advice to them, pick areas you can scale. Don't pick the shiny little toys on the side. For example. If anybody has more than 10% of what they had for customer service, 10 years ago, they're already five years behind.

If anybody is not using AI to make their developers who write software 30% more productive today, with the goal of being 70% more productive, so we are not asking our clients to be the first experiment on it. We say, you can leverage what we did. We're happy to bring out all our learnings, including what needs to change in the process, because the biggest change is not technology,

is getting people to accept that there's a different way to do things. To listen to the full conversation, visit IBM.com slash smart talks. Hey, it's Ryan Seacrest for Albertsons and Safeway. Ready to save, it's time for cyber deals. Put a spring in your step with fresh savings that brighten the season. These exclusive week-long digital offers on your favorite products are only available when you shop online. Save on eligible items from Kettle, Chabani, Quaker, Skippy, Hidden Valley, International

Delight, Frito Lay, and Signatures Select. Available now through March 24th on pickup or delivery orders only. Restrictions apply. See website for full terms and conditions. But this is like the exception to the rule. You know what I mean? Like this is kind of like Dragon Age Inquisition. Like everything they'd made up until then, Dragon Age Inquisition was shaky, but it was like, I think most people, I think that was game of the year that year.

It was like a lot of more people, more people enjoy it than didn't. And so like, Andromeda was like, oh, this is like a fluke. You could have, you could have almost thought like, oh, this isn't how things are going to go. This was just kind of like a misstep. Whereas like now it's like with the veil guard, it's like, oh, no, this is like kind of the commitment. Yeah. Like this is like they're kind of committed to just not deliver it. And also knowing there was no, they're they're finished with their patches, no expansions.

And that is it for that arc of Dragon Age. That's it. The game is done. I was like, oh no. It feels so bad because Mass Effect like, okay, Mass Effect. I have absolute no confidence in Mass Effect after this, but at this point, there's a little small kernel of like, okay, since I have no confidence, maybe they're going to get back at me. They're going to get back at me and they're going to make a good one. They're going to get back at me.

That's what that's what you hope for, right? Like there's like even even in like oh you got me you got me even even in the act of divorcing yourself entirely from caring about it. You kind of almost hope that like that gives you room to be pleasantly surprised by what happens next. It's like dude like they're like I've been getting a lot of DMs a lot of a I've been invited too to this thing like there's like a there's going to be a halo event next next next or this month actually. Yeah. In Seattle and they're going to be showing the next thing off apparently. and I'm just like... And you're not going.

I might go just because like that's an interesting. I mean, it's also free housing and like I would have to get the ticket, I guess, to fly. But like, I don't know, that's kind of neat. But I just, I kind of just don't care, you know? Like, it's been too long. Like you've, how many times, how many times are I go back to you, dude? I can only be put over the rocks so many times.

Like I can only be fucking butt fucked. violently so many times before I'm like, hey, either I like this or... So what are the, um... I don't, I don't want to have to be like, I like, I don't want to have to begin talking about my favorite kind of game with a bunch of caveats. You know what I mean?

Like, I don't know. I don't want to have to be like, yeah, you know, it's a little janky or like, yeah, the campaign's kind of whatever, but it plays really, like, I don't want to have the butt. I just want to be able to be like, no, you got to play this. It's good. Like, it's really fucking good. I want to be able to talk about, like, a Halo game.

Like, I would talk about, like, Doom Eternal or something. You know? Like, that would be nice. Yeah. But, like, I just don't, I don't believe that that's possible, really. That's interesting. Because even Halo Infinite, Halo Infinite, it's great. I actually think it's, I think it's more good than it is bad by, by a large margin.

But, like, it's still got this feeling about, like, man, it took, like, two years to get basic features in. campaigns kind of a, kind of a man, it's like, it's fine. I don't know. It's just, it's a bummer. And so I'm just like, I don't really want to think about this anymore. But it would be cool to I don't know, just see, being invited to an event

like that is kind of cool. Just, if for no other reason to just like to just like, be in an event like that, it's been a while since I've done like a convention or anything like that. If Kingdom Hearts flew me off to Japan, paid for my food and board, and it was like, hey, come play a new Kingdom Hearts game. I would go to Japan and not show up to the fucking event.

I would just not show to that, man. I would just not do it. I'm like, I'm not doing this shit. Suck my ass. Thanks for, thanks for paying me to come to you, you stupid motherfuckers. And then I would go have a fucking

amazing time in Japan. Yeah, it would be more about like visiting, like, so crummy. You're like, yeah, I'll be there. I'm so excited. Thank you for the opportunity. I really appreciate it.

It would be more about visiting Actman and like those people. Yeah. Yeah, see all those out of there. Yeah. But yeah, I don't know. Up in the North. What were you going to say there?

I'm just I'm just thinking about like, oh yeah, I'm just thinking of a different timeline. It's like what could have been. That's all I'm thinking it is. Like when we're talking about Xbox earlier, I feel like the same because of knowing what, retroactively knowing what happened to Andromeda

and why things got so fucked. And then the same thing with the Vail Guard and knowing that it, it could have been, it could have been infinitely worse. It could have been some live service fucking garbage. And then so it was meant to be.

Yeah. Even the art style is so obvious that they were trying to appeal to fucking a fortnight type of like audience or something. It's it is so the writing is so on the wall and it's like, okay, they tried their best to do whatever they could with it. And it's just like what could have been if it was just, it's like you think something like redfall. Like you just think about like, what is. if these suits were just like tragic. Make a good game. That's a good answer, actually.

Like Redfall is tragic because like arcane is great. And for that to come out of arcane is like a massive. Like they'd be probably one of my favorite games ever with a prey. And yeah, they were just like, make a live service, please. It's like, guys, stop. Why, dude. You'll sell. gang loads if you just make a solid

fucking game. I don't like, why are we do the infinite money loop doesn't work for everyone guys. No, that's, but they want that. They want that loop. The it's crazy too is that like, I could see a lot of the stuff that we haven't gotten, like watch you're like, what is it the game that you're, you're waiting for to get released? Like a Legend of Dragoon is it? Yeah.

Watch that be like a, watch that be like a live search. Like it's a live source. That's crazy. I was just like, that made me a little, I'm not going to lie. that made me a little nauseous. Like just, dude, it's sickening. It's like Simpson's hit,

what would it take? Simpson's hit and run is back as a live service game. It's like, what do we, well, that way. Derek, Derek,

what would it take for you to, like, what kind of video game decision would it take for you to be like, I think I'm going to end myself right now. I got to grab the charger for the iPad. Okay. I think I should, I think I should kill myself.

Um, who, luckily, you know, you know, you know what would be. It would be if something happened that disallowed me to play any, retro games

like if I if there was if it would have moving forward doesn't really matter to me as much because I always fall back on I still have like some of the classics and if some corporate greed did something like Steam and the consoles that it's just like nope the the arcades though you can't even purchase these or the PlayStation now or whatever the fuck it's called what like those things are gone like if they did something like that to only force you to play new shit

then I'd be like oh yeah I don't need to be here anymore more. Like, there's no, I don't need a beer. This fuck this. Because that's, because that's how I always, I've always fall back on the fact that I still have the old shit. Even with music, when like people get mad at like, uh, like, a lot of

bands now or they're doing remakes of some of their old projects and a lot of people are pissed off about that. But I'm like, why'd be pissed off? Just listen to their old, the old album still exist. Now if they, if they take out the old catalog, like say, for example, this band Whitechapel, They remastered one of their old albums.

And then they replaced the old one with the new remaster. And that drives me nuts because now streaming what? I don't like how the new one sounds. Like it just doesn't sound is dirty and way too many high frequencies. The mixing is it's just off for me. And the old one's gone. And I was like, wait a minute. So now this, when I normally make the argument that I can still listen to the old shit,

it's, I don't have that option for that. So as long as for gaming, I can buy an Xbox 360 and play my old shit, you know, but like say if they did something to just brick these things or that would, I would kill myself for sure. A EMP goes out and you can't use it no more. It's something like that where I literally can't play the old stuff because like new games will continue to fail us. And then I can always go, you know, I can still, I have to jump the hoops,

but I can go play gears too now. Now if they did something to where it's like, no. yeah I'm gonna jump in a bat of acid like vat of acid like we cares like I don't need to be around anymore all right well this will be the last one um some very confusing one I feel like there's a lot of so Kingston is obsessed with kids I made proof wrote in he says hello two funny people and one ugly stinky demon poop man who can't read that's actually the meanest thing I've ever seen why is this that is crazy Stinky Digimon, Digimon poop man.

Hating me. Hating me that much is crazy. That's pretty crazy. Anyway, he says, would you rather get deposited? So listen to this very carefully. It's a very weird. There's a lot of twists and turns to this. Would you rather get deposited untaxed $6,000 every month,

but wake up with a different kind of unshavable mustache every four days? Or you get $6,000 untaxed every week. week, but a random household appliance turns you extremely on. A new one is randomly selected every two weeks. So you just get unrelentingly horny at a random household appliance. I'll take the mustache. I'll take the mustache. I think it's funny.

I think it's funny. Because like Michael Jordan rocked the Hitler stash, and that's the worst one. That's not the worst one, but it's, it is. It's not a good one. Decidedly, what's worse than the Hitler stash? Hello, hello. I'm Malcolm Gladwell, host of Smart Talks with IBM. I recently spoke with IBM's new director of research, Jake Mbeta. We discussed his vision for the future of quantum computing.

At IBM research, what we always do is answer what is the future of computing, whether it's coming up with new algorithms, coming up with better AI, coming up with quantum, or coming up with just how do different accelerators go together. It's our DNA to answer the question of what is the future. Isn't it a perfect problem for IBM because you kind of need to have a legacy of building stuff? Yes. Building actual physical machines. Yeah, it's why I came to IBM.

I wanted the experience, the culture of building hard things that others have not done before. Where do you imagine we are in the timeline of this technology? There will come a point when it will mature. My cell phone is a mature technology at this point. How far are we from that point with Quantum? By 2029, we'll build the first fault-tolerant quantum computer. That is one that can run a very, very large, large problem. To learn how IBM is building the future of computing, visit IBM.com slash quantum.

Hey, it's Ryan Seacrest for Albertsons and Safeway. Ready to save, it's time for cyber deals. Put a spring in your step with fresh savings that brighten the season. These exclusive week-long digital offers on your favorite products are only available when you shop online. Save on eligible items from Kettle, Chabani, Quaker, Skippy, Hidden Valley, International Delight, and Signature Select. Available now through March 24th on pickup or delivery orders only. Restrictions apply. See website for full terms and conditions.

I think there are stashes that look worse in it, and then we have chaplain to be like, oh, it's the chaplain. No one thinks of fucking. It's the chaplain. You can at least me like, it's the chaplain. Nah, but see, me being, like, dark. Like, Jordan did in a Haynes commercial or something. And it's like, that's, that's my excuse.

But I'm just saying, I know there's worse ones technically, but I mean, nobody would be pissed off if you had anything but that. So I'll take it, especially since I can't really grow hair right here in the middle. people say I have a reverse Hitler anyway so I'm like you know I'll take it Reverse Hitler I've heard that a few times

I thought about shaving Hitler once and I was like I'm glad I didn't do that I thought about doing it once and I was like I'm glad to do it when we get off the podcast I think you should straighten I think you should straighten your hair and you should shave a Hitler stash

into your fucking face dude you should get like the fury haircut you know like get the like yeah yeah not a Hitler youth haircut get the fuck dude that's so Andrew Shultz yeah yeah do it. That be sick as fuck.

I don't know. That haircut is like, it's so weird, and if you know, like, if you're a white guy, you know, like, that's a... It's an interesting choice. Oh, I don't know. I don't know if I care. I feel like it looks good enough as it's like a standard haircut for me to be like, eh, it's not like a Hitler mustache where it's like, that's so specific.

Um, oh no, like the, the Hitler youth haircut looks like a very generic haircut to me. It was, it's a white boy. It was pretty generic, you know, like, it became popular at that time. It's just like, dude, so many things. that the Nazis did became popularized, unfortunately, even like within their medals of honor and shit like that. Like they just stole everything. They had swag.

They stole swag. Even in video game circles, like Gigi came from the Nazis. I. Yep. People would say they would say Gigi. They would say good and gaman. Good and gamen. That's right.

Good and gamin. That's not really, that's not really German. Shut the fuck. Shut up. It'd be like good guy or something like that. Gooden is more like, Guten Tag. Gooden?

Yeah. That's German? I thought that was like Dutch. Well, Germans, Germans are the original Dutch. Oh, you're right. The original British too technically.

Them being called Germany actually makes no sense because it's just like Germanic, right? Which is so many languages are, but yeah, it's, it's literally Deutschland. Yeah, people are,

Germanic, Germanic is just, isn't it just like? It's an umbrella. Isn't it just non-Latin white? It means they're... It's the non-Latin white. It means they're fucking dirty.

It means they're covered in germs. Yeah. These are fucking... I forgot about that. That's actually where the bubonic plague originated from. You know, because... That's where all germs comes from actually. The germ man.

Interesting. The, uh, the play, the filth plague doesn't come from the place where everybody calls filthy. Very interesting to me. The filth plague doesn't come from the country that they all called swarvenly and disgusting. It came from the countries. that they think are pillars. Oh,

they were throwing shit in the streets for a bit of stuff, you know, like, you had your kids were dancing in it. Oh,

my, this, once you're dancing it don't smell so bad, you know? He's doing the fucking modern Harlem shake in shit.

Brim, brim, brim, man, man, man, man, Ra,

colotterorita. And they were like, this kid's really added a curb. He's dancing violently coughing throwing up their inters and stuff He's violently coughing

The rats are clapping for him They're dancing so slow Because they're fucking immune systems Shutting down That's crazy That's crazy I think it's so funny thinking about how This how disgusting

That part of Europe was This is how genuinely gross Yeah I mean The king smell like a spoiled dick hairs. And you're like, this is the fucking king. There's not a lot of places. What the fuck is this? It's crazy how not a lot of places.

It was like maybe China was like the cleanest place on earth. Back then at a certain point. Yeah. Well, no, a lot of, they actually had like a civilization and like a proper like understanding. I think it was just that part of Europe was really gross.

Because everywhere else for the most part is like, you have to clean your mind. I think that's, I genuinely think that's like cope. Because Latin America, Latin Americans did it. There's proof of it. The Native Americans did it. There's proof of it. There's proof of everything at various points in history.

It's not a matter of like regular bathing. That's the thing. Well, that's what I'm saying. Like they did it. They would bathe them. They would, oh, your gross, clean your body. Yeah, but like they wouldn't do it as often as they should.

Well, yes, comparatively, I agree. You know, I think, I think mincing words about like how filthy people were back in the day is pointless because it's all fucking disgusting by modern standards. Like it's all fucking heinous. Everybody smelled horrible. Relatively. Yeah. Disgusting.

It's a disgusting planet. Well, yeah. But I guess he's he's talking about compared to other tribes that didn't have on a bunch of clothing layered in hot fucking concentrated cities full of people. That is true. Like so it's just really it really it's just all it's just bad sewage sewage practice. That's the. biggest issue.

It was the non-baving stuff, sure. But people just, you know, not just throwing their shit into the street is crazy. The thing that's so crazy is that like I just, I don't know, man, I think about every, it's so funny, like, that there's like this romanticization of like, um, anytime there's like old like romance story and like in like old in times or whatever, I can't, I can't do it because I'm just like,

you guys both smell like fucking garbage. It's either that. I know it. I know it. What makes it crazy is probably like the aromas enticed each other, you know? Like all of the musk had to entice people. You know what I was thinking of. That's why niggas was raping so much because the aromas of women would fucking send them crazy.

I was thinking of like when there's all these, they have like accounts when people are like really sick like kings, certain kings, they're like infected and then they're getting like gangrenous and all this stuff. And there's like accounts of their servants and stuff vomiting. from like and all I was thinking was how bad do they smell like to us now they already smell like shit but now those people are vomiting from like the you know like the peatrice stint or the oils and stuff that a slave who probably isn't even allowed to bathe is getting sick

they're they're coming with like a tray of like I don't know apples and fucking lamb shanks or whatever it is that they fucking ate they're like here you go sir just like projectile vomiting immediately. And the fucking the king who's fucking, you know, out of his mind because there's bacteria swimming in his fucking medullaabling god or whatever. He's like, rape him. He's like, kill him now. You know, like, all right, I guess we got to kill him too.

We're running out of servants. I guess we got to kill him. I'm sorry, Tommy. You know, you're my best friend, but, you know, we got to kill you too. It smells crisp. Imagine someone walks over those rooms. Yo, it smells crazy. Yeah.

Someone just says that immediately. No, it smells wild. Crazy in there. Don't go in there, mate. He has a modern Boston night accent for some reason. He's the progenitor of it. He's like, Hey,

you smell that guy over there. He smells like shit. That is how it sounds like he sounds like the departed. He sounds like the departed. That's how the bad smells created that accent. Accents. That's crazy. He took a whiff and he was like,

Oh, what the hell is that? I'm going to become a cop. I'm going to become a cop and inflict the white supremacy on people. Oh, my God. I'm from Boston. Oh, my God. I'm from Boston, he says. In Victorian England.

All right, let's fucking whatever. It didn't even come out of yet. Let's read the names now. We're going to read the names of our $25 and up patrons over at patreon.com. I say snark tank. Remember, if you want to hear fucking. If you want to hear your name right at the end of the show, go on over there, $25. Oh, no.

Well, what's going on? Nothing. What? You can't audibly say that and say nothing. Did it digi mon die? Yeah. It's Tomicacci. No.

No. Say it. I played a prank a few months ago where I hired a bunch of aircraft carriers to land on your house for us. And I hired them for pennies on a dollar. And I sent them directly to China. Oh my God. I got to pay tariffs now. Oh, man.

To get my carriers back. What really happened? Was it just like nonsense? Nothing. It was something stupid. It's not so important. All right. Well,

anyway, we're going to read the names now. Count me down. Three, two, one. Joker's girl squirted on me. Oh,

yeah, that's a great clip, dude. Get this man to a hospital. Now fucking Batman freaks out. It's such a good clip. It's such a good clip. It is a really fucking great.

Because it's Mark Hamill saying it. Mark Hamill's the guy. Like he's like the guy on the ground. It's like, Junkers girl squared it out of it. Get this man to a hospital now. He's like, yo,

all bullshit aside, get this man somewhere immediately. Oh, it's so good. He's going to die. So good. good. I forgot about that clip. Anyway, God's favorite femme boy,

Malik Barry, anal, fuck off, John, let me do my job, footcake. Cobeba, animatronic Sweeney, powered by gay eye, TM. Teague, Jersey, no drawls, Kingstron, 115.1 gets damaged and becomes a worst co-host. The gay spider, a secret gay sciop to make Chris Ray Gay Gay Gay,

a guy so Jewish he tips in coupons and wants change. That is funny, but also the wrong people would like it. But that is really funny. Terrible people have ruined everything. Motherfucker, you don't know you'll never come near me. Shove this tooth tunes up your ass. Have you hearing shit queerly? Damn.

Shuffing a tooth tunes up someone's ass is fucking outraged. Do you remember, you know what a tooth tunes? Yeah. He's fucking stupid. Those two brushes that would like vibrate a song at you in your teeth. No, like, what an insane invention is like somebody in a boardroom was like, invest in this. This is the future. So fucking stupid.

Getting jude out of $25 by two big black sex ladies and a light skin twink. Delta Gamma literally fed this toddler last week. Why is it still crying? Squimp his bugs. Clamule Esquire the third. The straightest thing you can do is fuck trans women. Hit me up. Episode ranking viewer Halloween costumes.

Hello, hello. I'm Malcolm Gladwell, host of the podcast Smart Talks with IBM. I recently sat down with IBM's chairman and CEO, Arvin Krishna. And I asked him, how can companies use AI to its fullest potential to create smarter business? My one advice to that. Pick areas you can scale. Don't pick the shiny little toys on the side. For example.

If anybody has more than 10% of what they had for customer service 10 years ago, they're already five years behind it. If anybody is not using AI to make their developers who write software 30% more productive today, with the goal of being 70% more productive, Yeah. Wow. So we are not asking our clients to be the first experiment on it. We say you can leverage what we did. We're happy to bring out all our learnings, including what needs to change in the process,

because the biggest change is not technology. It's getting people to accept that there's a different way to do things. To listen to the full conversation, visit IBM.com slash smart talks. Hey, it's Ryan Seacrest for Albertsons and Safeway. Ready to save. It's time for cyber deals. Put a spring in your step with fresh savings that brighten the season. These exclusive week-long digital offers on your favorite products are only available when you shop online.

Save on eligible items from Kettle, Chabani, Quaker, Skippy, Hidden Valley, International Delight, Frito Lay, and Signature Select. Available now through March 24th on pickup or delivery orders only. Restrictions apply. See website for full terms and conditions. Ozympic Drauger. Sween for Halloween just wearing just the... wearing just the Dr. Neo N.

Nice. That would be a crazy costume. If you shaved your head and just had like the the cortex like side like I can't. I shave my sides too often so they won't have,

they're not long anymore. No, listen, listen. If you managed to do that, even if it was just garbage, you just shaved the middle of your head and just put a big fucking end in it, it would be the, it would be the,

iconic Halloween I would have to do that where I'm at I'd have to do that I have to wear a hat all the time and then when I'm at the place I draw the end on there and see like what's going on guys and I put like the most

terrible green paint on my face like terrible why he's not green Cortex? Yeah he's isn't he green? No are you fucking crazy isn't it? I thought Neo-Tor-Tex was green

no he's just a white guy Yeah if anything maybe he's a little beige right like He's like pale maybe he's like Was he green in one depictions And I saw him in? No,

He's never been green Oh my eyes are just fucked Maybe I guess I thought he was green He still looks green to me right now a little bit But I guess not Are you that colorblind that you think he's like A white guy looks green?

He's like yellow beige, Isn't he? I thought he's like yellowish green I guess I can be wrong, whatever I'm not A yellowish green He just keeps throwing green No matter how ungreen he looks

He's way more yellow than I remember. Yeah, he's like he's colored. There's like one iteration of him where he was like less yellow. It says in 97. But like everyone else, he's pretty like a look fucking banana. Yeah, he got yellow where his time went on. He got sicker. He really did.

He's fucking his liver's gone, dude. He drinks only wamper fruit alcohol. That's it. When he's thirsty, he gets a picture of it. Have you guys seen a guy on TikTok? that the guy is like fucking work suck today and it's him with a bag full of fucking hot dogs and like a giant like a picture almost like a fucking maybe one gallon pitcher of like fanta and he just bets his lunch at work i'm looking at so i'm going to ignore what you just said but like he looks so i'm looking at a picture i i looked up dr cortex and there's this one where it says dr cortex through the years it's a redid post from our crash bandicoat it is crazy because in the first three games, it's very clearly he's just a white person. It's just like a white

guy. It's like an old, like mad scientist white guy with like kind of pale skin and the yellow is like clearly coming from like the lighting around him. But then immediately in 2001 he just becomes fucking ridiculously young. Like the second, the second

it leaves naughty dog he became, look at this, look at this. We don't have any Chinese villains. That's great. Look at this. Look at this image. I just sent it in the in the Riverside Chat. Look at 2001. Like when it leaves NottieDot. Look at how drastic. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. I love the 97 design of him. That is the peak design of him. I love that. Crash too, baby. He looks sick. He looks sick. I love it. Like the year, yeah, 97 and 98 are my favorites. I love. I just, he looks so fucking evil. There's nothing redeemable about that guy. He looks like he's in the beginning of evil. He's trying to figure out what evil is really.

And he's like, I'm just going to start doing bad stuff to like stick. That's crazy. I'm just going to throw bad stuff at the wall and eventually it'll work out, you know? I'll set fire gas stations. I'll fucking punch his horns in the mouth. Doctor N-word cortex.

Got to love him. Dr. N-word cortex. I'll do it. I'll shave my head and do that. I was just going to think of a costume and I'm like, I'll do that. That's brilliant. I love that.

my forehead's a little too small though that's unfortunate i gotta forget that's why you would shave your head it would give you more forehead i'd have it on no it would start at your forehead it would go up into your like over your uh the head over the crest of my head anyway uh where was i uh ozepic draugers sweet for all okay yeah there is her uh hercules percules mercury mercury worker bees overseas seashells by the sea shore sea cells by the she shorkulis Fuck you What a piece of shit Percules, Berkeley's Mercury, Workerbees overseas

Seashells by the Shishorcules Is an insane fucking name Someone wrote that He was probably He was probably laughing His ass

While he was writing He was right He was so funny He's so funny In his documents Slap the shot of him Dr. Cortex I'm fucking

I don't know He's having Core sex With it is With his Rolex He's having

Core sex With a Rolex And On four legs And And And

While a Poor begs While a poor begs Let's go Oh my God Oh Dude I'm going

I'm sorry This is the idea of like Like someone writing that down having a good time doing it, they're like giggling him out and their dad just walks and it starts fucking screaming at the fucking grabbing him and shaking

him, shut the fuck off and he's just like, sorry dad. Stop rapping, stop rhyming. Stop having fun of this shit. Fuck are you doing giggling in the bedroom? What are you doing? I'm sorry, dad. You're probably mad. But I... He just beats his son hard. Beats the shit of these rapping

serious. He's rapping to the beat. He's rapping to the He's rapping to the beat that's being made by his dad hitting him so hard. Okay. See, your strikes hurt. Hit me down in my deep squirts. It's crazy. His pain's worse than probably giving birth.

Birth. Antarctica is officially considered a desert. The horrors beyond. It's a tundra. The horrors beyond humans. to just have life. The horror is beyond human comprehension, uh,

exists. Everything has life. Uh, the horrors beyond human comprehension exists on Sweene's phone. Why do you think he's always giggling like that? Uh, two rats piloting mecha swine. Old snake, but he's addicted to paint huffing.

Hey, H.L. White. I believe that. Yeah. You think there's something. He definitely has some sort of drug problem at that age, for sure. It's the one thing that's missing from like the metal.

your series that he's clearly I mean drug it to yeah you gotta you gotta be they have to be fucked up on something to be doing the shit that they're doing oh yeah they're all tweaking on something

you know to be working forearms until they are the same thickness as my arms and dressing like Steve from Minecraft that is insane I suck dick because gay you suck you gay

because I suck dick, not same. Oh. What is that? Preserker Blackman backshotting Broly, Reckless Rhino, the Sloker 2, wiserapy. Guys, how do I carbonate my blood? I want fizzy boners. That is crazy.

I like that. I've seen bubbly come before, and I'm like, what's going on here? No, you haven't. Use flashlight salesman. Okay. Not in person, no. What are you coming on a hot plate, you freak?

No, I've seen someone coming as bubble, bubbling out. If you came on a hot plate, do you think if you listened, if the room was quiet and if you hear screams? No, you probably hear pop.

Stop. No, I'm alive. We were talking about, we were talking about, I would not bust anymore if I could hear. I wouldn't care.

I wouldn't do it. I'd bust more, actually. I'd bust more. I just blast music. We were talking about somebody because I went to Costa Rica and I saw little monkeys while I was there, right?

And all you saw monkeys like, yeah, ate them. What I did is I, I boiled the water. and I slam them in the pots of boiling water. But we're talking about that.

The idea of a monkey getting the monkey. So what killed it first is really the question. The collision of the bottom of the pot or the boiling water on the way to the bottom of the pot. Is that like a double kill of like a single person, like a single entity? no, no, no. And then what I hit it, there was more. And then Ben was like, I kept having the duct tape the top clothes so the monkey wouldn't get out. But the boiling water would make the duct tape worse. So I'd keep having the duct tape more and more on top of it. So the steam wouldn't ruin the duct tape. Oh, man, you were, you really thought this through, didn't you? I wasn't me. That part was Ben. That part was Ben. Well, listen. Use flashlight salesman, play Megabond. It's kind of like vampire survivors. Charlie Kirk, more like. truly in the dirt old man spaghetti nuts damo nation liberty prime is online

system nominal weapons hot embrace democracy or you'll be regulated uh... Derek Natchelvin is in instant hashtag free him round-eyed Asian making his 42nd Patreon account to sub to the $25 tier Hello hello I'm Malcolm Gladwell

host of the podcast Smart Talks with IBM I recently sat down with IBM's chairman and CEO Arvin Krishna and I asked him how can companies use AI to its fullest potential to create smarter business. My one advice to them, pick areas you can scale. Don't pick the shiny little toys on the side. For example.

If anybody has more than 10% of what they had for customer service 10 years ago, they're already five years behind it. If anybody is not using AI to make their developers, who write software 30% more productive today, with the goal of being 70% more productive. Yeah. Wow. So we are not asking our clients to be the first experiment on it. We say, you can leverage what we did.

We're happy to bring out all our learnings, including what needs to change in the process, because the biggest change is not technology, is getting people to accept that there's a different way to do things. To listen to the full conversation, visit IBM.com slash smart. Talks. Hey, it's Ryan Sechrest for Albertsons and Safeway. Ready to save, it's time for cyber deals.

Put a spring in your step with fresh savings that brighten the season. These exclusive week-long digital offers on your favorite products are only available when you shop online. Save on eligible items from Kettle, Chabani, Quaker, Skippy, Hidden Valley, International Delight, Frito Lay, and Signature Select. Available now through March 24th on pickup or delivery orders only. Restrictions apply. See website for full terms and.

conditions. They'll be insane. If it was just, this was all one person. He was just, like, really overcomplicating his life for no reason. You're, you're a blue collar worker. That's cute. I work at a ball crushing factory where they crush my balls. Chris interrupts people way more than Sween. Free my brother, Jinkston. I, yeah, I'm trying, I have the questions. I'm supposed to interrupt. I'm like supposed to. That's crazy. You're gay. A silly little Billy snorting Coke and Pilly, Queen of Fap Hazard, blonde blue-eyed German man campaigning to make

Pokemon 2D again. I don't need to confront the truth because I have my Racon earbuds in my ear. I think I might have said that. I think that might be something I wrote. Gay homeless and deported. Ow, oh my neck. Thugzilla versus the IDF super soldier

Melvin Bomb. I'm waiting for the second. Okay, there we go. GtA4 swing set glitch. Funneling Sweens cut into the American Heritage Foundation. Bumstrokers, Dicula, saw Derek sleeping on the train, so I touched his blank. Benassus, Greek god of the herb, Sween. The Sween animatronics still looks like shit. Big Meaty stinks. Canola Joe reloaded? Hey guys, can I borrow Sween for a for mandingo fighting tournaments? That's crazy, first of all.

No, whatever. You go, Derek. I'm not big enough. I'll go. Yeah, sure. Yeah, you'll be my champion. And then you win, you win. You flawlessly. win and everybody's like, God damn it. Gay actor Rosebud Delicious. Pulling a cart, pulling a Kurt Cobain with an elephant gun. That's crazy.

Because you have to be standing up. Yeah. I'll figure it out. You take your shoes off. You use the toe. Yeah, the trigger. You're good. Yeah, man.

It must have been quite a sight, huh? Sorry I can't. I had a burrito. Trained her wrong as a joke. She ain't even know it. Heath back from the fields. What did I miss? I shot my face

With the gun And my blames flew on the wall Yeah, the wall It was red from my brain man Yeah It's fucking insane Yeah It was bloody

Yeah my brain You don't know that you're right enough And I want to to bleed just like me out of your head I shot up my face hmm hallowed out

my brain yeah that's the sound his body baby when he shot himself that's crazy that's a that's fucking fit Hey man, I can't wait for the new Batman to drop because then like, you know that song's going to come back.

And then I hope they don't bring it back. They're got to bring it back. They're going to probably. And then that's when that parody is going to show up. You got to show up with a blue off my fucking face. Yeah. People thought you made the parody and that's crazy. That's great.

Like there doesn't even sound like me. It just, I don't know. It could sound like you. That's not like. impossible for you to make your voice sound like that. But that fucking a Batman one, the something's in my ass and people thought it was me. I got tagged in that shit.

I'm like, I didn't fucking do it. I shared it with the watermark from TikTok is on it. You should have lied. You should have lied about it. He's taking all the credit for it. And then when a guy comes up to you, be like, dude, why are you lying about me? You fucking make him look crazy because you have more of a media

present. He probably does. He's fucking fucking loser. Well, you're just trying to get some clout. You want to be like, we just. don't you, huh? You would never be like me. You're a bitch. That's so fucking mean. Sometimes you have to do it, man. We need more people that are

willing to do terrible things to other people. I agree. We don't. Please don't follow me. That really sent me. I really sent me is. Okay. Sorry, I can't. I had a burrito. All right, I read that. Actual swing quote, episode 277. What if instead of spirited away, it was called

Take the N-words away. Amazing. That'd be an interesting name. Yeah, it would be interesting as the right word, exactly. And then it would lead into the movie. You're like, I wonder how they're going to do this. How do they're going to stick this landing? And it's a great film. Studio Niggly.

Lily hates Indians, do not feathers. Dot, not feathers. She loves Indian people. Monkey Man now owns an RPG 7. Hardhead, Pee, you should dress up as an Oreo. I love that. That's a pivotal moment from you. That's crazy.

That was a moment that really mattered for your development. You were like, I think hard and a Pee Pee, that was the first joke you told and you were like, funny. He was got to laugh out of people. Wait a minute. Wait a minute. Jesus Christ. Kingston is becoming genuinely irritated. Let's do.

Please fire him now. Obama, when he had a member. I'll be like, let me be queer. At Starbucks drive-thru, to get my gimp a pup cup. I don't know. Yeah, a pup cup. They give dogs a fucking, they give little puppies fucking whipped cream.

That's really bad for dogs. Yeah. They give dogs whipped cream at Starbucks. Yeah, you put me like, can I get a pup cup for my little doggy? And I'm like, mischial is terrible for dogs. He's like, I don't care.

It's my property, right? And I'm like, all right, cool. And I put fucking, I put cleaning solution in it. Killing people's dogs Yeah Mm-hmm Fucking up the ante for you

I'm sure Okay, you want to do that bet Here you go Yeah Yeah It's a group people fucking singing it With their hearts out Give me your dog

I'll kill it With a cup Of my whipped cream Yeah, Whip cream. Kill your Doug. Kill your dog. Be the John Brown you wish to see in the world. Hispanic at the disco,

cardboard pie. You look like you can use a fucking lamp. Kingston Dad was clearly taking Tylenol. Shirtman movie Extra Ammo Sweene Gay. Somebody wrote it a sacred during one of our streams and was like asking for us to make Independence Day 3.

I'd be done with that. I'd be done with that. Yeah, I have to listen to it again. I don't remember it. I remember like... It being dog shit. I remember the spirit of some of what we were saying. But I don't remember the... I don't remember the plot.

The Uncle Phil... Full, to get some water and sinking you. That shit was so... He was writing to Lachniz Monster or something. Like, I don't know. There's some weird specifics about it. Anyway, gay skater boy be like... Gay skater boy would be like,

he was a boy. I was a boy. Can I make it anymore? obvious. First of all, he wrote, he was a boy, he was a boy, which is like, it's not really how it would go. Sween droid, listen to Snark Tank. Wait, Swingdroid, listen to Snartank number six, 557. What? What does this mean? Can we say something? Let me look it up. Yeah. I'm actually curious. I want to see what this is. StarTank number six? Is that the one with I'm Alex?

I hope so. Am I still connected, guys? Am I good? Yeah, yeah. My thing is saying that the connection's like trying to reconnect. So I was like, what the fuck? But, okay. Oh, weird.

No, we still hear you. Oh, my God, it keeps auto-correcting to Shark Tank. I hate that. Stop. No. Episode five of Snark Tank. That's the one with the Onesion bad. Nisian.

What was the time number? 557, I think. 5.57. I'm gonna do about tree 50. I want to hear it too now. 557. Snark tank. Oh my God is when Derek tells me to do the orgasm sound for Helen Keller.

Oh, yeah. Wow. I do remember the Helen Keller orgasm. Slur-maxing. You could have just said. You could have just said. You didn't have to give us a fucking scavenger. hug you bastard.

Oh, that's really bad. It's pretty good. I remember being accurate. Eight days sober. If you don't eat pussy from the back, you're not hungry enough. Big boss says it isn't gay if it's in outer heaven. That's pretty solid.

Yeah. Goon man or goon devil, the man without cum. Green Day mind soup. Mies feel like they're full of skeet. Dried up and bulging out my skull. I fucked the guy. I drank his gum.

I challenge the other. Oh, there's a fucking fly in here. God damn it. Oh, the window's open. That's right. Fuck. I challenge the other hung trans girl to a sword fight.

Most stable UE5 game is Sonic Racing Cross Worlds. The Dead Worms in your ass. Smitsch the kid. Bend my dick, come in or snatch. Nice. Roboswino Vision. The Democrats are turning me trans at night. True.

Oh. See profile picture. Make him say trans. That is fucking crazy. Dude, I want to trans all the classic fucking reps, you know? Like, they'd be sick as fuck. Dude, this, that's, that's, that's, like, dear mama. I'm like, dear mama.

This profile picture is crazy. I don't know if you were going to be able to see it, but. Hello, hello, I'm Malcolm Gladwell, host of the podcast Smart Talks with IBM. I recently sat down with IBM's chairman and CEO, Arvin Krishna. And I asked him, how can companies use, AI to its fullest potential to create smarter business. My one advice to them, pick areas you can scale. Don't pick the shiny little toys on the side.

For example. If anybody has more than 10% of what they had for customer service 10 years ago, they're already five years behind it. If anybody is not using AI to make their developers who write software 30% more productive today, with the goal of being 70% more productive. Yeah. So we are not asking our clients to be the first experiment on it. We say, you can leverage what we did.

We're happy to bring out all our learnings, including what needs to change in the process, because the biggest change is not technology, is getting people to accept that there's a different way to do things. To listen to the full conversation, visit IBM.com slash smart talk. Hey, it's Ryan Seacrest for Albertsons and Safeway. Ready to save, it's time for cyber deals. Put a spring in your step with fresh savings that brighten the season. These exclusive week-long digital offers on your favorite products are only available when you shop online.

Save on eligible items from Kettle, Chabani, Quaker, Skippy, Hidden Valley, International Delight, Frito Lay, and Signature Select. Available now through March 24th on pickup or delivery orders only. Restrictions apply. See website for full terms and conditions. Oh yeah The fucking That was Derek's

profile picture I'm pretty sure I fucking love that picture It's probably my favorites I think it's in my favorites On my phone No Top 10

That's a good one Make him I don't even have favorites I gotta go through my phone One day I'm gonna stream my camera roll And I'm gonna go through my phone And choose my favorites

It's a great idea Hamster in a sock Isk is now plus five After a sense of use Izzy I know you're listening To this I want my fucking dog back You Vapid Sal

Blonde Blonde haired green eyed Zimbabwe man competing with the German guy for racism. Yoush. William Murder Face. Murder face. Murder face. Murder face. It's a crazy last name.

Last month, I almost died from pneumonia. You very well could have had a dead person in my name reads or in the name reads. Yeah. You probably do have at least one or two. That's a dream. That's a dream. Is that we, you know, we get a couple dead people in our audience, you know. I mean, it's part of life. People die eventually, you know.

no Derek you played you played dead rising yeah do you remember the name of the mall I don't good why doesn't don't worry about it

I'll just ask you no I can remember if I cheated I can remember if I looked at Craig the Canadian Micah better draw an M on her forehead for Halloween that's crazy

Masha Micah it's your boy shawney d comshot gaming team at rock is this true my profile picture has been young chris for six months and he still hasn't noticed robo swine has become genuinely your day and listen to please unplug him now listen to the listen to the hushethe by will i am for absolute goldmine of the hardest stupidest bars of all time harassment is not a joke bully hunters dot or nice fumble the six three trans girl should i kill myself she likely thinks starly her is more moderate because her husband is a crystal fashion by comparison good vibrations by the beach boys i'm dicking up male got up um um um

I'm dicking up male gibrations. He's giving me the dick I crave son. Nice. That's insane. Tom Brady. Tom, Twini be like, I respect people's sexuality.

That's Sam Twini, class. Ah. Obie won't you blow me. Charlie Kirk lost a gun debate. Kremlin to Gremlin. Can Sweenie go on a calorie deficit, please?

Calorie? What is that? Is it less calories than you have for a day? No. I, I mandate that he, eats. I have rules here, right? Where like I actually,

Kingston's not allowed to eat anything less than 10,000 calories every two hours. That's insane. That's insane. Actually, my clothes actually started fitting better insanely recently, which is unfortunate. Because that means I have to buy no clothes. It sucks the most. Nope. I lost, I lost two pounds,

but all, it's all in my hand. All from my hands. So my hands are fucking finished shit. My hands are wispy and fucking. I lost pound. I lost weight in my bones. Is that interesting? Is that weird?

My bones lost weight. Jason Horhees. Chris is in the top five wiggers of all time. In honor of it being Halloween month of October, you guys should do a, this is homo win. This is homo win. Home o'ween. That's actually perfect. It's not a bad.

It's been a while since we've made like a thing like that. So it's not a bad idea. Homoween would be good. Yeah. We got to figure it out. We'll do an extra ammo where you write it. Trans Tucker Carlson. More like Tucker Carlson.

Papini Bros. Presents Crash Course Cybertron History, rises to Decepticons. Donk, Doncerson, pumped up dicks by Finger the Peepole. Mason the Metalhead sang Gaydeoactive at karaoke. Pee-Pee, why does Trump say black with an uppercase L? He does. Black.

Yeah. Black. I was really close. to self forever sleep last week if I ever do uh do it just it should just zero out my bank account to this Patreon fan lesbian cunt evil edition Charlie Merck

the jk and jk rallying is short for a gigantic cunt John Strickland Merck's 1889 fucker on the rag call that a cockstaining cunt yeah I mean okay the first shirt of Keith David presents Sween the darkest cracker

to pimp a butterfly is so bad that's insane M's recovery is genuinely better actually for real. You're clearly trolling. That's fucking crazy. Nobody thinks recovery is good. I don't even Eminem thinks it's good. I think M looks back at Eremises and it's like,

damn, they were just giving rewards for anything, huh? They were just trying to prop me up, clearly. Pre-Ros, Blake 8-96, I got Lockjaw doing grave air shifts at the Dick Secking Factory. All I got was Lockjaw's previously mentioned. Young Fly on the track. Absolute snark tanks, Chris's. absolute snark tanks Chris is half black I don't know oh I see absolute like the absolute Batman that shit is so good man it's great I it makes me so sad they're doing a crossover event

between then the main universe and I'm so sad I don't want the main universe touching it at all it's really unfortunate it's just gonna bring all the stupid shit from the main universe over there and I'm like no it's so good Pete Davidson's dad is uh rolling in his grave after seeing his son take that Riyadh money yeah dude Yeah, that's crazy. You know what's crazy about that? The connections are so direct, it's nuts. Like, literally, like, people who bought, who owned the Riyadh Festival are, like, genuine, actual, like, key players.

Like, 9-11. It's actually outrageous. Das Goopy. Making gay parodies are songs that don't exist to make them unreadable. That's such an asshole thing to do. I'm going to resurrect Charlie Kirk as a gay zombie with a permanent hard cock, like the scene where Robocop is lungs. but boner. Young Colin shoving his head into an

animatronic swine's mouth and slamming it shut. Nancy Pelosi versus Camelto Harris, Nicky Ziggis. If you guys had minions, it would be the Spy Kids' thumbs except made of Dix. Yes. The Dic Dix? The Dick Dix? Yeah.

Guy watching Chris's stream and eating ketchup off a plate by hand. It's brutal. That nigg is from brutal legends. That's crazy. That is crazy. My hand got stuck in a lave. I come on my toys just in case toy story is real. That's so funny.

That's crazy. Imagine being young enough to think that's true, but old enough to be able to come on them. Like what is that age range? Like what is that like age? Like maybe 11? 12? Yeah. Maybe 11 like.

I can't remember. I can't remember when that started really. The first time I came, I was. Definitely 38. Okay, so that makes a lot of sense. I believe you.

Yeah. Anyway, Sweeney TM by magical Electromotive. That's crazy, actually. That's the company in Breaking Bad that like fronts all of Gus Frings business. Sorry, Ms. Jackson.

Who's New York, Nick? Ethereum needs help lowering his weapon in Halo 3. Progerian Hunter, Nefram, and rounding out our list as always. You know him. The king of haphazard. Let's go. Let's go.

Cue my fireworks. Slam that monkey into a bowl of boiling water now. Ding. All right. Let's get the fuck out of here. Patreon. Patreon, the comments, less than dark tank, dot shop. Like, comment, subscribe, all that crap.

We'll see you next time. Yay. Suck. my thick, liggas. Want to earn extra income for your business? Amazon Hub delivery is looking for ambitious business owners to assist with local deliveries. When you become a partner, you and your staff will deliver packages to customers in your area on a schedule that works for you. With each package delivered, you'll gain extra income and exposure for your business. Plus, Amazon Hub Delivery makes it easy to get started. There's no upfront costs, delivery experience, or long-term

contracts required. Sign up to learn more at Amazon.com slash hub delivery. That's Amazon.com slash HUB delivery. Hey, it's Ryan Sechrest for Albertsons and Safeway. Ready to save, it's time for cyber deals. Put a spring in your step with fresh savings that brighten the season. These exclusive week-long digital offers on your favorite products are only available when you shop online. Save on eligible items from Kettle, Chabani, Quaker, Skippy, Hidden Valley,

International Delight, and Signature Select. Available now through March 24th on pickup or delivery orders only. Restrictions apply. See website for, full terms and conditions.