The Snark Tank - #378: Does Piccolo Have a PP?

Episode Date: December 3, 2025

https://www.patreon.com/TheSnarkTank

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and go pick up or delivery. Restrictions apply. See website for full terms and conditions. Hello, everybody. Welcome to the Snark Tank podcast. It's me, Chris. It's him, Sweeney. It's him, Derek.

What do you do? You're good, brother? Oh, sorry. Trying to fight, you know, full moon's coming, trying to fight it. Oh, I see, I see. Didn't it pass? Whatever.

It passed as far as the viewers are concerned. The full moon's subjective, actually. Just whenever I feel like it is, that's when I'm actually. Oh, okay. Word, word. I mean, technically, the moon's always full, really. Like, you don't have like a...

It's actually a ridiculous. The concept of a full mood is actually absurd. I feel fucking stupid. I really do. I really do feel stupid because I've never considered that. How is that relevant to what the full moon means? Well, because it's just like, oh, it only works when you see it? Well, no, it's because of how much is visible.

But the visibility of the moon does affect how. tides work, though, literally. I don't think that's true. It is quite literally true. It's the position of the moon. It's the position. It's not the visibility of like how. That does coincide with the phases of the moon.

It coincides, but it's not causal. It's not causal. That'll be like, I'm indoors. So it's a completely obscured moon. No, no, no. It's not causal, but those, the visibility there, they all coincide. They all coincide. Yeah, it's not causal.

But yes. The moon is always full. There's not important. Someone's not putting pieces of the moon together based on your visual perspective. I guarantee you, Casey, I guarantee you that that sentence blew a couple people's minds. I bet there's a couple of people who probably never considered the fact that, oh, yeah, the moon is always full. I think that is, if that blew anyone's mind, I'm really sorry. I'm really sorry.

It's not a mind blow, but it's like I bet most people haven't considered that because I haven't considered that until just now, in fact. That's crazy. Oh, wait, it's full. Always. That's like saying when you don't see the sun is the sun's, up there. It's like, how is it possible? You just,

but you just argued that the visibility of the moon. Chris, affects the tides. Chris, Chris, Chris, Chris, that is, thinking that the moon is not full all the time is definitely sillier. It's just,

it's just, it's not a thought that people think of. That's not an active thought. I agree with that. If we, yeah, we thought about it, I am,

it's really the thing that just fucked me up with, with the lichen lore, though, like the, like a werewolf type of situation, that is kind of, funny because of thinking like oh i think it coincide i can only see three quarters i'm fine and then just a little bit i think i think i think it's the it's the it's the position of it is what affects them it's

it's not though because that's not what it means it's what happens if you shine a really crazy flashlight at the moon when it's not naturally full what does that mean like what happens if you illuminate the entire moon to make it a full moon when it's not naturally full moon when it's not naturally full moon when it's not a full moon. Like, does that make a Werewolf, Werewolf? I think it's position. I think it has to... Well, it's magic, first and foremost. That's what it is. First and foremost, it's magic.

Yes. Secondly, if it, it has to be the position. It has to be similar to the way it affects the tides. That's the only way they can kind of rationalize it. Other than that is just stupid. Because we'll be changing all the time. People back in the day, actually never considered that they probably thought

literally the moon was turning into different shapes and sizes and shit. probably we thought we thought that the earth was the center of the universe i love that was a arrogant that is that's like yeah what is it's it's happening right here it's all going down geocentric i think is geocentric we are by the way this is the the most fucking nerdy we have all ever looked on a singular show yeah somebody's foaming at the mouth right now that's all i know So the clothes The clothes that we are all wearing

Are absurd It really is like If you just saw a still frame of this podcast You would assume completely wrong things About what this show is about Yeah like oh They're probably talking about some stupid nerd bullshit Yeah they're talking about dirt culture

The geocentric model of the universe Was the initial belief that the earth Was the center Well he might be right actually Of all astronomical Astronomical theory That's crazy Did you say astromical

I might have mispronounced to astronomical. I like astrolamical better. I like sky llamas. Sky llamas. I like astrolamas. And we're going to find out one day that actually all llamas are, they are interstellar. Did you know?

Did it was a period of time people believed that sunlight, like light came from people's eyes? Isn't that fucking nuts? I do. I do believe that. I think I remember hearing that. I think that's just crazy. It's like, what if someone woke up at nighttime? Dude, I saw a video.

You told me you that. dude i saw a video yesterday it made me so upset it was like this uh and i could tell it wasn't like a bit i could tell it wasn't rage made because it was like i think a girl this woman was like tripping on something but she held a towel up to a mirror oh partner was like how does that and it's like the recording from the side and like she holds a towel up to a mirror and because a mirror is a fucking mirror like the other guy can see her face in the reflection despite the fact that the towels in front of her and she's like how How is that possible?

How does the mirror see me through the towel? And I was losing my fucking mind. I was like, I can't believe. It makes me so upset. I thought that was an interesting one because the thing, though, that was pissing me off in the comment sections when I saw that on Instagram was everybody was being smug. And this is a part where it's like, I know there's a lot of ignorant people out there. Somebody help somebody out in the comment section instead of just being like, you dumbass. Where I'm like, just help a motherfucker out.

Because I understand a lot of these people don't know it. It is sad that. I feel like seventh grade is when I learned about that type of science. Like when we're learning about, I remember my Mr. Yoshina and learning about that shit. And I thought that's really cool, you know, and I feel like what's happening to school because I feel like that's learning about reflections and how light works is, I think that's kind of paramount.

I think people, I think they're still doing it. I think the issue is that people are on their phones now. Oh, I really do think that's it. I don't think much is changed. But also, I,

you're absolutely right. Dude, I saw another thing too recently. And I could tell. There are certain things you could just tell are bit. There are certain things that are in question about like whether or not people are being sarcastic or whether or not it's a bit or whatever. And I get that. But like there are certain people where it's just like, oh, no, this is authentic. And you can tell by the way they double down and how they're doing. I'm insecure about this. I saw this woman talking about how like, dude, I was today years old. And she was like 28 or something. So you look like older person. It's like I was today years old when I realized that there's no actual medicine in glasses. What did you say to me? Oh, that. What'd you say? That, man, that's actually a good joke, you know, but you're, but you can tell she's serious.

No, she's serious. I don't get it. Right. No, it's, it took me, it took me. It took me at somebody who wears glasses, like a good 30 seconds thinking about it, being like, what the fuck does she mean? Because at first I thought, like, what, like, cups? Like, it doesn't come in, like, glass capsules. Like, what do you mean?

Got it right away. Prescriptions. Oh, prescription lenses. Oh, I really didn't get that. Okay. I got that I mean because it's like, oh, your prescription glasses. And so she thinks prescriptions are medicine and not a prescription, something you prescribed to, which is right, which is cute. It's a nice joke if she wasn't, if she was joking.

I understand the logic, I guess, if the only prescriptions you have ever gotten were medicine. But the issue is, like, how the fuck do you think that works? How do you think the medicine goes into the person? Like, what do you think? Like, I just don't even understand. I don't know. There's things like that that I see regularly. I'm like, damn, dude.

It's getting rough out there. Anyway, um, welcome to Star Tank podcast. Patreon. On the Com slash to Star Tank. Remember, by the way, go over there, go over there. Uh, and we'll, uh, you know, we'll, we'll harass you probably. Uh, go over there.

We'll upset. Leave a question. Leave a comment. Do all that stuff. All sorts of tears. Early access free, uh, early access, ad free episodes. exclusive episodes we did a snark tank of jeopardy for an extra ammo recently that uh i think is pretty good uh but yeah what do we got to there's nothing really we're reporting this a little bit

before thanksgiving um so i don't know when this will go i probably like probably after but yeah i don't know thanksgiving is a weird thanksgiving is a weird holiday for me because like it's like it's like so family oriented then i'm like yeah i don't care if I'm not home. But I don't know. Gotcha. Yeah. Yeah.

It's my favorite. I'm not going to cook. I'm not going to cook for myself. It's crazy. Right. But I guess we'll just go into questions because there's not a lot of news that I'm saying. No. There's not a lot of,

let me check Twitter real quick just to make sure. See if something insane happened. No one's. I saw Zarn Mamm Dani on Adam Friedland and I watched it and it was the most boring thing ever because they were just nerding out about football. And I was like, or like soccer. And I was like, well, I couldn't give a fuck. Un-American shit?

Yeah, incredibly. It's the most I've ever been anti-Zoron in my life. I was like, man, you're a fucking dweeb. I can't believe you give a shit about people kicking a ball back and forth. You nerd, you dweeb. I like, I like soccer. I ought to punch you, dude. I like soccer.

It's fun. Yeah, I didn't watch it. I saw the promos of it. I'm like, I'm sure it's going to be fine. But I'll be honest. I don't... Hello, hello. I'm Malcolm Gladwell,

host of Smart Talks with IBM. I recently spoke with IBM's new director of research, Jake Embatta. We discussed his vision for the future of quantum computing. At IBM research, what we always do is answer what is the future of computing, whether it's coming up with new algorithms, coming up with better AI,

coming up with quantum, or coming up with just how do different accelerators go together. It's our DNA to answer. the question of what is the future. Isn't it a perfect problem for IBM because you kind of need to have a legacy of building stuff? Yes. Building actual physical machines. Yeah, it's why I came to IBM.

I wanted the experience, the culture of building hard things that others have not done before. Where do you imagine we are in the timeline of this technology? There will come a point when it will mature, right? My cell phone is a mature technology at this point. How far are we from that point with quantum? By 2029, we'll build the first fault-tolerant quantum computer. That is one that can run a very, very large, large problem. To learn how IBM is building the future of computing, visit IBM.com slash quantum.

Hey, it's Ryan Seacrest for Albertsons and Safeway. Ready to save, it's time for cyber deals. Put a spring in your step with fresh savings that brighten the sea. season. These exclusive week-long digital offers on your favorite products are only available when you shop online. Save on eligible items from Kettle, Chabani, Quaker, Skippy, Hidden Valley, International Delight, Frito Lay, and Signature Select. Available now through March 24th on pickup or delivery orders only. Restrictions apply. See website for full terms and conditions. I don't really... This is the coolest Adams ever appeared, but he's... He was the perfect punching bag on Comptown.

I think this was being an interviewee is the only thing he could have done because God damn, like being a comedian on his own. And like when they, they had it like a stupid, it started off like a talk show, right? And then the jokes were first they were kind of crazy because Nick was writing them. And then it got like, I was like, oh, man. This is like, you know, somebody, one of your closest friends blows up with you. But, you know, one person is the guy that's driving the whole thing and the other person's kind of coming along. So, you know, not trying to be disrespectful to you. What are you smiling about?

What? I think it's a. What are you smiling about? Chris, I am funny independent of you. No, you are. I am funny independent of you. No, I do think you are.

Is, yes. I just thought there was thinking about it. It is very funny. It is quite similar relationship. Because I didn't have to grab you. I didn't have to pull you out of, you know, fucking being at Starbucks. I was like, what are you doing? Right.

It is true The sentence was just funny It didn't even occur to me that scenario Like that wasn't even trying to do that But especially since I actually do I actually do I don't know why this keeps happening I keep saying this is probably the fourth time

I'm going to say this Yesterday I was just talking about that We're talking with Jojo We're talking about like You can't be big do you talk all day Like what the fuck is going on? Are you talking about things? Are you having?

Do you converse with your girlfriend all day? Because that's weird I absolutely do not That's interesting But like, I guess there's a few times we talked, but we were just talking about, um, the funniest moments we can remember off the top of our heads of the show. We're kind of like,

like, reviewing the show of like, and then I was thinking, what are the first things that come to my mind? And then I was thinking of I recently, because I already recently, the Jaggats thing. I thought that was,

I thought that was so good and fast. So that was one of the things that I was thinking of that I was like, oh, that's quick. This guy isn't like a slow, uh, well, you know what I mean he's not always slow he's just lazy and has no sense of time it's the only fucking problem

I think that funny joke I think the lack of funniness in jokes makes jokes funny oh yeah it's terrible it's terrible you're an anti-joke person then it's funny I think I think this is really bad I think upsetting people and telling jokes that no one else laugh at are funny which is really

bad because that's normal i mean that's how norm that's a very norm that's a very norm donald doesn't constantly say the n-word in times when you probably shouldn't so you know probably not yeah i think if he would like if he would have made it 10 years older it was like oh why not let's yeah maybe let's just do it now he probably was before he died let's go out let's go out swinging yeah yeah yeah let's go out calling people slurs but yeah sorry i we totally derailed you. What were you saying? Adam Friedland. Oh, I mean, I've pretty much said what I need to say about

watching his, I have not watched a full interview of his since he went fully independent and like, you know, Nick just went to chill. So I'll catch clips. And so the clips are sometimes, they're good. Like, uh, I actually when he had on a but Blake Griffin is

is a really he, Blake Griffin is so charismatic. It's insane. He's really funny. He's really funny. It's surprisingly funny. So when he goes on podcast, he's been on Starvos's podcast. He's done like the circuit and he can hang. He's really good at roasting himself too, which is like you don't have to like, you know, a lot of times you're talking to a celebrity.

Some of that's really much bigger than you, you kind of have to like, you don't want to be too insulting. But he's like one of the people that's like, oh, he's one of the homies. And it was really surprising. So that was good. But it really depends on who's on Adam Friedland's show. And like, I'm not trying to be disrespectful because I thought, I just thought he fit in so perfectly in Comtown that. I never expected to and some people might say the same thing about myself though

like oh I like you in stuff but independently you know fuck you know so and I think that's fine yeah there's always people who feel that way about yeah groups or whatever but like I think what is it yeah I was watching I was watching this thing you did with Zoran and it's just like his advertisers are very weird too because it's like it's like it's like Viagra stuff

like I'm curious as to like I'm curious this to the age demographic of Adam Friedland six years old is it a is it a Is it blue choo? Six years old. Little chis little kids. What? Was it, was he advertising blue choo?

It just, no, it wasn't that exactly. It was like, it was just things, first of all that I've never heard of, uh, in industries that I'd never heard of.

So it's just like, I don't know. It was just very odd. It felt like when, when you're, uh, when you're watching like cable television at like your parents house or something, and you see like,

oh, that's, they're selling pills with John Voit's name attached to him. Like, thing. It's just like, all right, I guess. But, but, but yeah, fucking suicide pills. You should tell you being alive. You should kill yourself with ease.

Are you tired of being, are you tired of being alive in this liberal hellscape? Yeah. Are you tired of black people having jobs that aren't? Are you tired of jobs? You're tired of black people having jobs that they have to be, that they, that they paid for? Yeah. They didn't.

They didn't deserve. They took that from a white man. They didn't always have that, you know. The nerve they have of hitching a ride on our boats for free. And then working, getting all that free workout. Free workout. I bet we helped them get their games. We helped them get their games.

It was us. It was us. That's why they run so fast now. It's because me. Because of me. They're so incredible. In fact, I am the reason why they got here. It's me.

Mr. Voigt, what are you implying? Mr. Dershowitz, what are you saying? You know what I mean. He does the swing hand back to angry heads. You know what I mean. I promise you, I know. What do you promise you? Like, I'm thoroughly.

This feels like the beginning of a monologue that I'm just not caught up on. Yeah, let's But you know what, let's just Let's start questions Let's just barrel into it We got a lot We had to talk We were talking about

If Piccolo had a penis We did bring up if Piccolo had a penis We did bring up if Piccolo had a penis I completely forgot about Before the show we were talking about Whether or not Piccolo had a dick And if he didn't want Like the argument that you're making

Is that he doesn't Well, he doesn't Okay, all right Well, I don't I've never seen him not have it Okay, it's very unlikely Better, better, better Because I've never seen

never went up to Piccolo, ripped his pants off and was like, ah, Piccolo Dio doesn't have a dick. The thing that's confusing to me is that, like, so he doesn't eat either, right? Like, he drinks water. He drinks water. He drinks water. So he does have, so he must expel, he must pee. He doesn't poo probably. He doesn't shit.

He has no rectum. He's like a slug flower. Okay. That doesn't really help me. Yeah. But, like, so he's not, so he, but so my argument is that why does he wear pants if he doesn't have anything to hide down there? I think it's this polite society.

I think the Nemecians created. He's also very human in the way he behaves. But so, I mean, the Nemecians do that, like you go to the NAMIC and they kind of do the same thing. Yeah, why did they have shame? If they have no genitals. I think they're from a society or other people have genitals. So they're like, they're like, they're not though. They are.

The Nemeckians? Oh my God. It's so much. So this is hyper convoluted bullshit. I'm sorry to, I'm sorry about this before I even go into it. So what happens is the Nemechians are technically not from Planet. They come from a different dimension first, which is a hell dimension. I'm sorry.

That's why Piccolo is a demon technically. They're technically from hell. Then they got say took refuge in that planet. Yeah, it went to that planet. What the fuck? This is devil make cry type shit. They'll make cry fucking steal that shit. It is.

It is stupid. And Daima technically was just canon for some reason. I don't know why they did that. In Daima, they go to the fucking. Underworld and they find Nemecan, a Nemecian there. And he's like, hey, this is where we're originally from. That's why your dad was the Demon King Piccolo. Because you see how it doesn't make sense that Piccolo's dad was Demon King Piccolo,

but it's like, but they're from Namik. So, and then it's like, it's just Toriyama right in more shit. I don't. I, exactly. That's exactly. As you're talking, I'm like, I know exactly what's happening. It's like, let's just add this. You should things together to make it make sense.

And I always say, sometimes you can just. just leave things alone and make it not make sense. And then just move forward with a retcon, especially in a show like Dragon Ball and Dragon Ball Z, that's fine. It doesn't have to link together. I think Dragon Ball is a series of just shit that doesn't need to be said that gets said. And the shit that needs to be said just doesn't get said. Yeah.

That is the biggest problem. In all of Dragon Ball, we've only seen these characters that have so much wildpower, we've only literally seen two people destroy planets ever with their own strength. Yeah, and obviously two people, even though they're supposed to be able to, able to, but it's like we've never seen most of them do it. We've seen Bull destroy a planet, but he booed himself up. Yeah, and we've seen Freezer destroy a planet. That's it.

And when you think about, well, who was the first one, you said? Abu. Freezer did. Also, Freezer do it the first planet. Regina did as well, which was really sad. That's not canon, but yes. did he did but that's not canon unfortunately that's back when you had brown hair

Vegeta in a different color costume what but what is that's not canon I think it's still can I think it's still why would that not be canon? That on their way to earth is not canon it's not his filler it's just filler I don't know why it's like it's not it's not in the manga I'm pretty sure oh okay you're saying it's not in the manga

so you so like you're saying like to you the anime is not so that's what most people consider I don't I just I think it he did it whatever but it's like they're like oh no it's not because that's back when he had is different art style, remember? Yeah, that doesn't mean anything to me. So it's like the idea, like, that's not canon.

Are people doing that because they want to make him not seem like a genocidal monster? I mean, he's a, Vegeta himself will tell he's a genocidal monster. He's like, yeah, I was, I was really in the shit. I just don't understand, like, why they would, because that's weird, because to me, I'd be like, Hello, hello, I'm Malcolm Gladwell, host of Smart Talks with IBM. I recently spoke with IBM's new director of research, Jake Ambeda. We discussed his vision for the future of quantum computing. At IBM research, what we always do is answer what is the future of computing,

whether it's coming up with new algorithms, coming up with better AI, coming up with quantum, or coming up with just how do different accelerators go together. It's our DNA to answer the question of what is the future. Isn't it a perfect problem for IBM because you kind of need to have a legacy of building stuff? Yes. building actual physical machines. Yeah, it's why I came to IBM. I wanted the experience, the culture of building hard things that others have not done before.

Where do you imagine we are in the timeline of this technology? There will come a point when it will mature. Right? My cell phone is a mature technology at this point. How far are we from that point with Conton? By 2020. will build the first fault-tolerant quantum computer. That is one that can run a very, very large, large problem.

To learn how IBM is building the future of computing, visit IBM.com slash quantum. Hey, it's Ryan Seacrest for Albertsons and Safeway. It's stockup savings time now through March 31st. Spring in for store-wide deals and earn four times the points. Look for in-store tags to earn on eligible items from Celsius, body armor, Oira Ida, Silk, Capri-San, Bavarian Meets, and Charmin. Then clip the offer in the app for automatic event-long savings.

Stack up those rewards to save even more. Enjoy savings on top of savings when you shop in-store or online for easy drive-up and go pick-up or delivery. Restrictions apply. See website for full terms and conditions. There is something. It's really fucked up, but there's also how... That is great comedy because when you think about it, like he just liberated all those people. like thank you so much homie you're the and then boom freedom's freedom's not so great is it

so i'm looking up so it says so i looked up is vegeta destroying a planet canon it says and i the result i get is no the scene of oh well now it's see see this is fucking pointless oh it's now it says no the scene of king vegeta destroying planets is not considered canon okay well i don't give a shit no the thank you thanks a lot blowing up the planet the most well-known example of the character blowing up a planet in the films of dragon boz he involves the same conquer Akira. Wait, what? Conquering Akira, the planet, which is not part of the original manga. There you go. Yeah, it's not a part of the

original manga. But like say so, anything that's not a part of the manga, anything that's not a part of the manga, you shouldn't be considered canon. More often and not for anime, no. More often. I never considered that. I never even thought about it. It's canon to me because I don't give a fuck. I think it doesn't hurt anything and it just happened. It's like whatever. Think about this in like a

in a sense where something came from like a comic, something like Watchmen or something. And then if they did something different within like, say, the HBO series or say the film itself, I just never considered that. I never considered that, no,

I'm ignoring what happened in the cinema or say in the anime or the cartoon because it was different, it was different in the original source. I never really considered that. I do. I do because like there are times where things happen that just don't make sense.

You know, granted, it's not a big, it's not a big, like I truly think. I've detached a long time ago From the moment I saw Spider-Man have organic webs

In a Ramey movie But I was like, oh, I still like this I was like, it doesn't matter Which one I enjoy. I'm enjoying the version of the thing I enjoy. Yeah, to me, that's kind of like a preference thing That just happened to me immediately. I was like, okay, cool.

So he doesn't happen in this But that's fine, He doesn't need it in this. Yeah. And that's where I was like, I go with everything. I don't really care if things are canon or not as long as they're cool.

Yeah. I would say, because I wonder how I'd feel and I can only talk in this retroactively or just in with hindsight is because it's just like okay how would I feel if it was it was organic in the you know like say I grew up with I grew up with it being in those fucking canister things and you would fucking make that shit right and then what if it was the other way around how would I feel I feel what I'm saying right now is I think I would still prefer that because I like the idea of the extra you know the it just it just makes him like oh this motherfucker's a genius look what he made and also. so the stakes that it adds, like when he would run out and shit, which they put in the show. I think it's narratively better.

I also think it's weird because he doesn't have that part of his body. That's what I think it's funny. Because it's like the web creator is fucking the back of his abdomen. Right. So him creating out of his wrist always was like, oh, that just doesn't make sense to me. Right, because it would look hilarious if it came out of his ass. But at the same time,

this nigga can lift 10 tons, dodge bullets, run up buildings, and pick up cars and fling them. So I was like, all right, this is really me having a really solid stake in the ground in this one position is stupid. I just think that the webs, the webs being organic make him more of a fantastical person, gives him an actual like spider power.

And the inorganic and being created gives more towards his intelligence as an inventor. So it's, it's either or either or is fine. Yeah. I'm not bothered either way. I've never dwelled on that in the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the ramy shit or anything. It was just like, whatever. It's, it is what it is.

But hold on. It bothered me when I was little, for sure. It bothered the fuck out of me when I was little. It annoyed me at first, but I really don't. It's not something that I like, stuff. It's like, say, when I, other movies, Mortal Kombat Annihilation, for example, the second one, they changed, like, the cast, they killed Johnny Cage immediate, like, the things like, the things like, that's, like, that sucked.

That's, you know what I'm saying? Like, there are things that are genuinely bothersome. maybe Mount Bulge's CGI and fucking the spawn. Holy fuck. Like there's certain things that still bother me. I can imagine little you being vexed when they show him as a demon. If I knew how to like swear like like really well at that time, it would have been coming out in the theater because I was like, what is this? I just like I can't, I'm sure I've said this on the show before, but imagine being fucking seven years old.

CGI is a relatively new thing in the movies that they're really blasting. And so it shouldn't look that bad to you because it's like the first tries, really. But damn, it looked bad then. Like, it was like, this is fucking awful. And that's a feat. That is a hard thing to do. Because if you look at King Kong back in the 1930s or whatever, that looks hilarious to us now. But back then, people were fucking terrible.

You know what I mean? Because this was the first things that they were doing. Those are the first fucking effects that they were doing. Do you people like, oh my God, look at that thing? Do you think they thought black people turned into King Kong? That's what probably like a lot of fear. This is what happens. If we leave them to their own devices, they're going to turn it to these.

I'm sure somebody did. I'm sure someone did. I know it sounds stupid. I get it. It sounds dumb. But really think about that. That was probably a real fear. Shut up.

Are we in agreement? Does Pickle have a dick or not. I don't think he does. I don't think so, but like I... Okay. All right. So we're... I think he's got a cloaca. Okay. Mm, curious. Curious. All right. I think we're in agreement. I think we solved it. Hello, hello. I'm Malcolm Gladwell, host of the podcast Smart Talks with IBM. I recently sat down with IBM's chairman and CEO, Arvin Krishna. And I asked him, how can companies use AI to its fullest potential to create smarter business.

My one advice to them, pick areas you can scale. Don't pick the shiny little toys on the side. For example. If anybody has more than 10% of what they had for customer service 10 years ago, they're already five years behind it. If anybody is not using AI to make their developers who write software 30% more productive today, with the goal of being 70% more productive. Yeah.

So we are not asking our clients to be the first experiment on it. We say, you can leverage what we did. We're happy to bring out all our learnings, including what needs to change in the process, because the biggest change is not technology, is getting people to accept that there's a different way to do things. To listen to the full conversation, visit IBM.com slash smart talks. Hey, it's Ryan Seacrest for Albertsons and Safeway.

Ready to save, it's time for cyber deals. Put a spring in your step with fresh savings that brighten the season. These exclusive week-long digital offers on your favorite products are only available when you shop online. Save on eligible items from Kettle, Chabani, Quaker, Skippy, Hidden Valley, International Delight, Frito Lay, and Signature Select. Available now through March 24th on pickup or delivery orders only. Restrictions apply. See website for full terms and conditions.

I think he's got a really disturbing looking cloaca, and that's why he wears pants. I like that. And that's why the Nemecians wear pants. That's a good answer. Because it even bothers them. Let us know in the comment section, though. What you think? Are you on team, are you on team, are you on team, are you on team, are you on team?

There's no genitals at all. Penis or no genitals? Or no genitals. Yeah. Voting. We'll have a poll. I don't even think you could do that. I'm on team no denitals, you know, myself.

It's crazy that you can't do shit like that, by the way. Like, it's been like, as far as I know there's no way to like that you can't just have like a voting module in the comment section of a video I think you're right I think you can

I definitely I saw that before I'll text it right now because you can do it everywhere else essentially you know on Instagram now right exactly yeah but who's really on Instagram God anyway Big Papa

Pump and dump wrote in damn says greetings my three sleep paralysis demons I was simply wondering if Derek was familiar with the Japanese wrestler who goes by the name Razor Ramon Hard Gay. Figured it was information important to him. Yes, he just took another very famous wrestler's name and added hard gay to it.

Like the legend gain. Anyways, thank you for the laughs, you chuckle fox. Happy crank's dicking to you and yours. I absolutely have not heard of that. And I'm going to look that up immediately. Hard gay. Let's see. I can't believe that in pop up.

right away. That's kind of disrespectful. Razor Ramon. So a razor. Masaki Sumitani is his real name. Yo! He's just in leather. Is that real? Yeah, it's just like he's like like, he's like

gayser Ramon essentially. That is crazy. He's just, that's ridiculous. I wasn't expecting him to look like a, like an 80s like, you know, You know, 80s gay. I don't know what you say. Yeah, yeah, the 80s homosexual.

80s homosexual male. I feel like without Rob Howfield from a Judas Priest, this is never what had happened. Because, like, he was probably the most famous guy wearing all that leather and shit, like, out there. And then people didn't know he was gay. So all these, a bunch of people started wearing it in the metal community. And then people, people who were gay knew Rob Halfwood was gay because they understood. They're like, I know what's happening here. You know, like, you took what was in our community and brought it onto the stage.

And now it's going worldwide. That's a bunch of cool, ass, heavy metal heads. Just gay as fuck. Oh, okay. It's interesting thinking of the heavy metal guys and like how they were probably so homophobic, but also dressing like the biggest queens ever. It's beautiful. Like, this is hilarious.

Y'all don't even get it. That looks so insane. Like, I know. I have friends. I have friends parents who was like, they are definitely homophobic people. And I've seen them in 80s. And it's like, you didn't see this? You didn't, you didn't know how you were dressing?

You didn't know the signs you were giving off to people. It is interesting. You weren't paying attention. Brother, in the scene in the, when I started playing a bunch of bands in the mid-2000s, like, you know, all those scene kids were all over the place. And man, some of the, some of the people that were at the show, I remember two guys in particular because they were friends with the guys that I

were in bands with. And I'm like, you're, you're a, you're a woman. I don't know, what's happening? Like I, you're, you're a beautiful woman. And one time,

we were going to the movie standing in line and then old man bumped into this dude Paul. And it's like, excuse me young, a lady. Like, just like, like,

because he can't, obviously he's not going to be able to tell. Beautiful flowing hair, super tight pants that are kind of like rolled up, above the knee and stuff. Like, it looks like, like a summer 80s chick with some crazy ass fucking scene hair.

And I'm just like, that is, uh, that's got to be dangerous because there's going to be guys like, you like, oh, let's go to a bar. Like they're going to be like, yeah, I'm going to roof you that lady right there. And then they're going to get, take them home and be like, oh, there's a dick and balls. Well, well, I'm already here. That's crazy. I mean, unfortunately, that's the world we live in. Well, listen, I didn't know anything about this Razor Ramon game.

Yeah. Hard gay is a really cool guy. I actually can't believe I didn't know about this. Yeah. It is information that he assumed you would have. Hard gay. Anyway, Uncle Phil Ryden that cryptid patron wrote in. He says,

sup fuckers. I forgot that we talked about how, like, the Lochness monster was, had Patreon or whatever. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Uh, sup fuckers. I'm feeling called out, because on episode 375, you were talking trash on my favorite band, Hollywood Undead.

Eat shit and die. But I will agree that everywhere I go is a joke of a song. Even further, the censored music video is a hundred times funnier because the censored sounds make no sense for the song and just fuck it up even worse. If there's a question in this mess, what song slash media was made funnier or better because of it being censored? I always think about that, the Big Lobowski, when he goes like, this is a question. is what happens when you find a stranger in the Alps. Yeah. It's just such a ridiculous fucking way to censor that line.

I like it. I like that. It's always silly. It happens when you find a stranger in the Alps and it's like, what? Stranger. Or what is it? What is it? What is it?

Yipikaii, Mr. Falcon. I've never heard that. I've never heard that. That's great. Yeah, yippy kie kie, Yipikiei, Mr. Falcon. What is that?

That's great. It's not even his name. Not even a little bit. That's good. Yeah, it's iconic. But Hollywood is your favorite band, huh? I have questions about that. I do have questions about that.

I know some people that liked Hollywood A Dead. I was a roommate with a guy that was like that, but he grew out of it, you know? It was like, oh, I'm older now. You know, I look back on it and it's, it's in the same way that I was, I'm not going to say it again. But this is what, Jesus Christ. I was just talking to Jojo about stained last night.

I don't know what the fuck's happening. It just keeps relevant shit keeps happening. It's weird. I don't know why this is happening. You're not talking to your, you're imagining this. Can you imagine? You're fabricating talking to Jojo. Jojo's still in fucking, what you call it?

She's still in Kazakhstan. Yeah, yeah. She's still in Kazakhstan. Eating a fucking horse meat or whatever she's doing. The horse mess. Yeah. You ride your horse. It brings you all your goods.

And then you're like, you've been a great animal. You kill it in. take a huge sword and chop its head off. One clean slice, man. That's strange. Yeah. No, I was a stain. Stained is that band for me where, you know, I, well, actually, I guess I can't necessarily say that. I never really, they never really spoke to me necessarily, but I still will pop them on and be like, yeah, I like those tunes, you know, and I feel like. Yeah. But I do have questions for writer of why there. your favorite band like like

still because I'm assuming you're probably like in your 20s or something maybe you're younger um he's in his 90s. Yeah. A 90 year old listening to Hollywood and dead would be amazing actually Hawaii. I'm listening to this show is even

more concerning. It is that that is no it's not. We're relevant. We're relevant to the 90s people in that age group. I do want to find our oldest listener. I want to know who is officially our oldest listener. What do you think? What do you think would be the oldest person listening.

Dracula. 48. That'd be sick. I really like. I'm going to go older. Inward. 48. 52.

54. I'll say 50s for sure just because I imagine there's some people that were interested in like, say, maybe political takes at some point. And they're like, oh, let's see what these guys are doing now. And they're like, this is kind of funny, I guess. And then just they're here for, you know, instead of talking to their wives, listening to Snark Tank. Let me see.

My dad listens to this. My dad is like, what? My dad's, uh... Your dad listens to the Snark Tank. That's right. I forgot that. He's, my number one fan and our highest pay patron.

That's right. That's about 58. So yeah, there you go. My dad's, my dad. When's the last time you said, happy birthday, your dad?

That was the answer. That was the answer. There's no better answer than that. There's an answer. I'm trying to remember, though. Last time I said birth of my father was 2008. 2008 okay doesn't mean yeah nearly like around like when obama was like so the housing crisis

yeah they're not crisis and that's probably that's probably the only time i ever said it to him really i don't i don't i don't wish i don't think he should have happy birthdays so why would i say that too what would i lie to him that's so mean son after everything i did to you i tell him bad birthdays to you i tell him happy after everything i've done to you that's an awesome that's a great line. You're going to treat me this way? After everything I've done to you. Everything I've done to you and for you.

All right. What is this? Kingston. Splegy. Is that his dad now? But, uh, best friends with your dad. Oh, me and King Dad, you know, he took care of a little business. They'd get along really well other than a racism.

It's cranberry juice right now, actually. Yeah, your dad's a melanone, but you know, it's a good guy. Once again, it's a cranberry juice. Stop asking questions. Shut up I slap my wife and son. Cursed. Whatever. Curse technique, nut in my hand and clap, rodent.

Very cool. He says, hi, fellas. I'm that guy that started balding at 14. Oh, wow, 14. Poor soul. That is. I mean, well, I mean. Hello, hello.

I'm Malcolm Gladwell. host of Smart Talks with IBM. I recently spoke with IBM's new director of research, Jake Mbata. We discussed his vision for the future of quantum computing. At IBM Research, what we always do is answer what is the future of computing, whether it's coming up with new algorithms, coming up with better AI, coming up with quantum, or coming up with just how do different accelerators go together.

It's our DNA to answer the question of what is the future. Isn't it a perfect problem for IBM because you kind of need to have a legacy of building stuff? Yes. Building actual physical machines. Yeah, it's why I came to IBM. I wanted the experience, the culture of building hard things that others have not done before. Where do you imagine we are in the timeline of this technology? There will come a point when it will mature.

Right? Yeah. My cell phone is a mature technology at this point. How far are we from that point with quantum? By 2029, we'll build the first fault-tolerant quantum computer. That is one that can run a very, very large, large problem. To learn how IBM is building the future of computing, visit IBM.com slash quantum. Hey, it's Ryan Seacrest for Albertsons and Safeway.

It's stockup savings time now through March 31st. Spring in for store-wide deals and earn four times the points. Look for in-store tags to earn on eligible items from Celsius, Body Armor, ORAIDA, Silk, Capri-Sun, Bavarian Meets, and Charmin. Then clip the offer in the app for automatic event-long savings. Stack up those rewards to save even more. Enjoy savings on top of savings when you shop in-store or online for easy drive-up and go pick up or delivery.

Restrictions apply. See website for full terms and conditions. I need to know more about you before I feel bad for you. That's crazy. I was like, because like there are people who, who just would pull it off. Oh, that's,

I mean, no, I thought you mean like, oh, you deserve it. If you shave your head, if you shave your head, well,

you started, starting balding in 14 means you're probably bald by like 21. Probably. Yeah. Is what that kind is what that really means. But there's no way, because being bald at 14 means you started being balding when you were like 10. Yeah,

which is ridiculous. But starting at that age, that's the age when everyone's fucking hurting and trying to make other people hurt because they're hurting. So that sucks to be like balding at that age. Hopefully this person was very hairy genetically and could have a facial hair. Yeah, good beard. Yeah.

At 16. Brother. Did I show you? Are you kidding? I've known people with full beards. 15 year old friend that people were saying, I'm sorry to tell you, but your friend was definitely an FBI informant because he's so, he basically looked like a fucking Viking.

And I guess I didn't know him because he was short. He was like five foot. But he was full fucking hair kind of doesn't make any sense. I'll pull it up in a second. That's crazy. I don't know. I think I would cry if I was balding at that age. That's so young.

Yeah. I guess it would have been inconsequential for me because I, I've been wearing hats and hoodies for as long as I can remember. So like, yeah, I would have went to wearing hoodies and hats. I wear hoodies a lot, but I don't wear hats.

I would have been a hat person if I was balding when I was younger. I want to be a hat person right now. I just have too much hair. Yeah, that's the problem with, because I'm growing out my hair and, and I'm already kind of dreading that. I'm like, damn, I'm not going to be able to wear my hats after a certain point. And it's the sacrifice you got to make. Get braids and wear a bandana. Had a bandana?

Yeah. The braids, bandana combination is powerful. Or the dreads with the rap. With the wrap. I don't know what I'm going to do. I might braid it just so I can like keep fucking, uh, because I don't, you know, locking it up as a commitment. Once you do that, trying to detangle

locks is fucking stupid. I've seen it happen. I've seen it happen. My aunt got are dastly tangled. And I was like, girl, why? Because all the waxy out of it, too, then you got to deeply wash it and you got to hope your hair's not dead. I was like, this is too much work. I think that's completely stupid. People like Jay Z with his fucking, his fucking

chito puff locks, the ridiculous ones. Couldn't be me, bro. Jay Z just, yeah. He just needs to keep his hair short forever and he could he would do well with a beard but he can't grow one he's like me his hairline is receding too much for him to not have locks anymore i think that's the problem and then we have the house to receding then you get locks to try to divert the attention from your airline receding have you seen his little chin strap that he have you seen like what he can grow on his

beard on his on his chin i've seen his facial hair for plenty of times it looks like you took a piece of like like you know horse hair and then put a little bit of spirit gum on on it and then that's it's it's actually kind of crazy i was like bro aren't you like 50 i think he's like i think he's probably anyway this guy wrote in i know right anyway this guy wrote in he says hi fellas i'm that guy that started balding at 14 oh shit yeah i just saw the schmolugals episode of smiling friends and it made me feel seen my question is would you rather be all the way chrome dome bald or just sort of in between Trevor phillips half bald that's crazy personally i'd shave, well, no, I obviously looked full

is like obviously the better. Full is the better. Because then you get like, that's just interesting at that point. Like being, like having the sides, that's worse. In my, in my opinion. I think that is nobody that pulls that off. Yeah. Like, I mean, because like there's that guy who has elopecia. He's in Barry and he's in a couple of other things.

What the fuck is his name? He played no-ho Hank and Barry. I care remember his fucking name. But he's in a bunch of stuff. And he has alopecia. like straight up. Noho Hank actor Anthony Carrigan so he's like

this dude has like no hair like at all like he's completely like and it's fucking awesome like it just looks interesting he looks cool oh yeah the actor I know you're talking about

he's the guy that was in he was in um Justice League I maybe I I really he played anthropomorpho

an anthropomorphor he played the morphine guy the guy I could change the elements yeah penis are you fucking talking are you talking about Superman.

Superman? Okay, yeah. All right. Does lead. I mean Superman. Duh. Yeah, it was. Okay. Yeah, no, yeah, he was.

That's right. You're, you're right. He's under a bunch of makeup in that movie and C.G. and stuff. But, yeah, he has no hair at all. He's in,

uh, he's in Barry and he's great. Like, I just think like that same person with the sides and no, nothing on top, he would look so stupid. You look so much worse. Yeah.

So, yeah, I would rather lose all my hair. That always looks interesting. I don't understand why everybody that has like the, only on the side. like, you know, they got the cul-de-sac or whatever, they don't just buzz it off at the very least.

I think it'd be interesting if I did that. Like, if I let my hair grow out and I shaved everything, it only had the sides left. I've been, let me tell you something. I'm sick of hearing you talk about this. I'm sick of hearing you talk about this shit. I think it would look funny. I don't give a shit because you're not going to do it.

Oh, no, but I think it would look funny. So don't, no, don't talk about it. Why? Why don't you guys do something crazy with your hairs? Do so why with your hairs? I've done it. It's been. No, Chris, you, you do something with your hair.

You wax your head bone. I've never talked about how funny it would be if I did it. I think it's still funny looking. I just wouldn't do it because I don't have the courage. Courage. It's just so it's ridiculous. Just do it, man. No.

Do it for the, what are they, uh, the vine? Do it for the vine. They're bringing Vine back. Do it. I'm not doing it for the, fuck Vine. Are they actually doing that?

They are, yeah. What? What? I think they're actually doing it. I think the person that, uh, that owns Twitter is trying to, not the person on the person that owned Twitter. Oh, Jack Dorsey, I think his name is. Vine.

Let me look it up. Because I was just, I didn't look that up at all. Oh, November 12th, 2025. What the fuck is this? Like weeks ago, tech crunch. Jack Dorsey funds divine, a vine reboot that includes. Divine. That's clear.

That's cute. Hello, hello. I'm Malcolm Gladwell, host of Smart Talks with IBM. I recently spoke with IBM's new director of research, Jake Gambata. We discussed his vision for the future of quantum computing. At IBM research, what we always do is answer what is the future of computing, whether it's coming up with new algorithms, coming up with better AI, coming up with quantum, or coming up with just how do different accelerators go together.

It's our DNA to answer the question of what is the future. Isn't it a perfect problem for IBM because you kind of need to have a legacy of building stuff? Yes. Building actual physical machines. Yeah, it's why I came to IBM. I wanted the experience, the culture of building hard things that others have not done before. Where do you imagine we are in the timeline of this technology? There will come a point when it will mature.

Right? Yeah. My cell phone is a mature technology at this point. How far are we from that point with Conton? By 2029, we'll build the first Volt-tolerant quantum computer. That is one that can run a very, very large. large problem. To learn how IBM is building the future of computing,

visit IBM.com slash quantum. Hey, it's Ryan Seacrest for Albertsons and Safeway. Ready to save, it's time for cyber deals. Put a spring in your step with fresh savings that brighten the season. These exclusive week-long digital offers on your favorite products are only available when you shop online. Save on eligible items from Kettle, Chabani, Quaker, Skippy, Hidden Valley, international delight, Frito Lay, and Signatures Select.

Available now through March 24th on pickup or delivery orders only. Restrictions apply. See website for full terms and conditions. Yeah, it's a little awkward though because it's like lowercase D, lowercase I and the capital V. Oh, stupid. Okay. Yeah, yeah. So it's like a fucking Italian.

I mean, it's probably better. Josephine or Divine? It says, yeah, Funds Divine, a Vine reboot that includes Vine's Video Archive. I'm going to be able to find my old stuff. No way, I'm important enough for them to find myself. It would be cool to see that stuff because I made a lot of stuff on Vine and then it just kind of died. And some of it got a lot of traction and then it just like exploded. It just killed itself.

But oh well. But yeah, no, that would be clearly the, it would be clearly the full bowl. Personally, if I shave my head and butter it because the second, I don't even know what what it is you're trying to say here, guy. So, okay, so this is the second half of this. My question is, would you rather be all the way chrome dome bald or just sort of in between you like Trevor Phillips half bald? And then he goes on to say personally, I shave my head and butter it because the second

what morsels of hair I have left get long, I look like a crack addicted sucks offender. You need... Damn, both. Punctuation, my guy. we must have the punctuation. We must have it. I do want to see what he looks like when he has transformed into a crack addict and sex offender. I would like to see that, though.

Yeah, we'll send us a don't do that. And then I'll be like, police, that's him. Police, it's him. Just ruining someone's life. It's him. It's him, officer. It's him. You know, it's crazy.

Genetics could have made me ultra-bald, like, Like my uncle on my dad's side of the family, Alopecia runs through it. And so I grew out of it, like which my doctor told me is like, yeah, it's a chance that it'll just go away. And it did,

I think in my freshman year, because they should just have like a bald patch on the back of my head for, for most of my childhood, I remember. And so I just always keep my head, hair buzzed. It was weird, though,

because every once in while the hairs when they would start growing back, it would be all fucking peach fuzzy and stuff. like all kind of whitish, grayish and stuff. It looked fucking weird. And then I, it's gone. So I'm like, oh, if I have kids, you know, roll the tights.

My kid might be a bald bitch. And then I'll just laugh at them. That's crazy. I've always just had a ton of hair. I don't know. I wish I was. I think it'd be funny if I was mangy looking, but. It is unfortunately,

you have to wax your forehead, you know? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That is crazy. It's like, it's like here, but here too.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. This is how big my forehead is. You should like fucking just grow out that piece of hair, you know, just above your eyebrows. Yeah, just letting keep going. I don't have any hair there. I have, nothing grows there. It's look like a visor like you're wearing a visor, you know? That's insane.

Sonic the Hedgehog feet porn, he says, hey, Willy Wonka and the chocolate, the chocolate freaks. Have you, have you ever heard, what is this? Have you guys ever had high expectations for a piece of candy before, but only to actually try and be heavily disappointed. For instance, I always saw Toblerones. Oh my God. I haven't thought about Toblerones in forever. I always saw Toblerones in stores growing up

and always wondered what they tasted like, only for me as an adult to finally have one and fucking hate it. Anything like that happened to you guys? I'm sure there's something. I'm sure. Like, I feel like most. I'm trying to think of just broadly, like, foods. I remember when I first had fucking,

I remember when I first had lasagna, I was kind of disappointed. Oh, really? Yeah, because it's like, it's good, but it's like, it's definitely underwhelming, I will agree. It looks a lot more grandiose than it, than it tastes. I like lasagna a lot. I really like lasagna. It's just always, it's always, I don't know what the, what's the layer of like that whitish cheese creamy shit? What is that?

Ricotta. Ricotta. I always feel like ricotta is underseason to me. Like, when I have it, I'm like, it just doesn't, I'm like, it's missing something. And it is missing. I got a lot of good. I got a lot of good lasagna. The only food is, like, the only foot that really disappointing me was, I think shrimp.

Oh, really? People were like, shrimp so good. And I was like, this is not that good. Oh, man. I love, I love shrimp. Bro, fucking shrimp curry and some rice. Holy fuck. Holy fuck.

I don't mind shrimp in other things. Holy fuck, man. A shrimp curry, like, for some reason. Sushi was overwhelming, too. Sushi was hell of hell underwhelming. It's crazy. People were like, this is so. good. I tried sushi. I've tried homemade sushi, like from Japanese niggas that made it at home, seasoned it well. I know they made it well. I just don't like it. It's so crazy, but God bless. I don't like I'm not a big fan of sushi rolls because they got the fucking. I would prefer the sushi rolls because I'm like, where's the flavor on the fucking sushi? And then I give you a bowl to dunk some bullshit. It's like when I look, I think we talk about going to Korean and Japanese barbecue places. I'm, I'd prefer the sushi. I'm like, I give you a bowl to dunk some bullshit. It's like when I look, I think we talk about going to Korean and Japanese barbecue places.

That's how I feel where I like to marinate shit. I like to really deeply season my stuff. And then they just bring out this raw shit other than a lot of times they go to the Bugogi. It's marinated. It's fucking delicious. Boggi is fire. Then they bring out like, oh, here's your pork belly completely unseasoned. Cook it and then throw a little something on top of it.

And I'm like, why am I supposed to love this? What the hell is going on? So it means like I'm only getting the Bugogi because it's fucking fire. It's amazing. I get the spicy chicken always That shit's also heavily marinated I get Bogogi and that's about it I don't really like

The penet if you get chicken penay Is actually pretty good I've had it at a few places It's it surprised me Because I'm like what the fuck says green shit Lily hates KBQ She hates that shit It doesn't like Asian food in general really honestly

That is so fucking crazy That's unfortunate I don't I don't understand that So she doesn't like Indian food She doesn't like like the Asian food Wow She doesn't like Asian of food in general. She doesn't like the best,

the best cuisines. I really think those are the best kinds of food. What is her favorite thing? What is she? Italian. She just only eats Italian food. It's her favorite. That's not that different,

especially if you're, if you get like the pasta. Well, like I guess certain the flavors, but like say, okay, you've been pasta getting noodles. What is the difference?

So the spices, it's something about the spices. It's the taste. Is it like the garlic? It's like, I know Asians like use a ton of garlic. Is it that? I think the thing,

Asian food in, I love Italian food. I just don't understand. I don't understand how you can. Italian food is my favorite food, but like I also love Asian and Mexican probably just barely under. You know what I mean? My favorite food is Caribbean food. I think Caribbean food is way better. But then I think like, I think Italian food is pretty good, but I prefer Italian American dishes more than Italian dishes. In all fair. Yeah. No, I agree. I would probably agree. Wholeheartedly. Whenever I see an Italian pizza, I get mad.

dude what's that pasta where it's like um can't be ravioli right like it wouldn't what's the it's like a square it's like a square with like a fucking milk pocket in it yeah ravioli is it really rabbioli really i guess for some reason like that ravioli feels like fucking chef boy rd well it's it is

shit ravioli but it's ravioli I guess I look back at we went to this um dude what happened the beef in it is swiny it doesn't make sense to me it's not even beef it's fucking it's it's I think it's brains, dude. I think it's brains because it's slimy. It doesn't make it. Might be.

But dude, I remember, like, my parents would get, because they knew some Italian restaurant guy, and he would, like, they would, they would hand make a bunch of the ravioli. And, like, at the end of the day, they would be like, well, we don't, you know, we can't, we got to make it fresh every day. So, like, they would just give it to people.

And then, like, my parents would get, like, supplies of, like, homemade, like, properly, like, homemade ravioli. It was fucking awesome. It's so good. It's like they would fill it like meat or like cheese. The cheese one was my favorite because it was just like such it. It's so obnoxious.

It was like one half step up. It was like it was like a gourmet way to have like mozzarella sticks. You know what I mean? It's like this is just cheese and starch. But it tastes like gourmet shit. It's awesome. But like I just don't understand how like you could not like Asian food or Indian food. I think those are all.

I think I really think Indian food is most of those are cuisine on the planet. I love Indian food. But it's biased because. Caribbean food takes a lot from Indian food. Sure. So I think it's like particularly Afro-Caribian food. It just can't be. I just don't understand how you don't have like, like, you don't look at garlic non or like a vegetable semosa.

She doesn't like it. She doesn't like it. She doesn't like garlic non? That's so Italian-cote. She doesn't like it. Doesn't it seem more like, uh, psychological than it actually is about flavor? Absolutely. But what is that?

Like that, that actually makes, no. I'm very curious about that. Like, what did they do to you? I talked to her all the time and I'm like, why don't you, like this food is so delicious. I think the thing is that I think for Mexicans it's the smell the smell of Indian food is so not like Mexican food and I think that like throws them off some Shut up Derek. Shut up Derek. Some flavors sometimes I understand something, but I feel like you can go to any culture and something is going to throw somebody off.

It may be that's a bad introduction because if you do I think I think about that thing. Do you remember Kingston that slot? I don't know what I still think about this when when I order. ordered, I think I ordered Zanku or something. I ordered something that I've had a million times and then I got something that I've never seen before. Like, like that I'm, the smell coming off of that shit was pungent to the point where I was like, I don't even know what country to blame this on. Like, I don't even know where it came from. That was the T virus. That was the, you got, you got, you got, you got, lucky. And he tried to make you eat it. Wait, it was like,

somebody eat it, right? Joe ate a little bit of it, I think. But like, he was, I think he tried it. I was not trying to. Dude, it smelled so crazy. It smelled like something that, like, you would give to, like, people who, like, spent their whole lives. They're, like, 55 or, like, 60, and they've, they've been working in the mines since they were, like, six. So, like, their palettes

are all fucked up and, like, caked with, like, you know, soot, and they can't taste anything. They can't smell nothing, all their senses. So they have to, like, over- fucking, just overloaded with, like, smells and spices and shit, just to, just to feel something.

that shit made me cry when I opened it like I teared like my tears were streaming I wish I knew what it was I would love it I wish I knew what it was still I wish I took a picture of it I don't know why I didn't yeah traumatizing I think I was just gross I was just furious because I was so hungry and then so I just like I ordered something else

but I was like bro I can't believe that whatever the fuck yeah whoever got my order must have been a lot happier right or they're really upset because they wanted that pungent shit Oh, I wanted my slug. I wanted my brazed foot over lettuce. Man, I really wanted my...

Aged foot, braised. I really wanted my slug. I'm so sad. But yeah, I don't know. I can't really think of a candy. Like, I always defaulted to candies that, like, I... Hello, hello. I'm Malcolm Gladwell, host of Smart Talks with IBM.

I recently spoke with IBM's new director of research Jake Embatta, we discussed his vision for the future of quantum computing. At IBM research, what we always do is answer what is the future of computing, whether it's coming up with new algorithms, coming up with better AI, coming up with quantum, or coming up with just how do different accelerators go together. It's our DNA to answer the question of what is the future. Isn't it a perfect problem for IBM because you kind of need to have a legacy of building stuff? Yes.

building actual physical machines. Yeah, it's why I came to IBM. I wanted the experience, the culture of building hard things that others have not done before. Where do you imagine we are in the timeline of this technology? There will come a point when it will mature. Right? My cell phone is a mature technology at this point. How far are we from that point with Conton?

By 2029, we'll build the first fault-tolerant quantum computer. That is one that can run a very, very large, large problem. To learn how IBM is building the future of computing, visit IBM.com slash quantum. Hey, it's Ryan Sechrest for Albertsons and Safeway. Ready to save, it's time for cyber deals. Put a spring in your step with fresh savings that brighten the season. These exclusive week-long digital offers on your favorite products are only available when you shop online. Save on eligible items from Kettle, Chabani, Quaker, Skippy, Hidden Valley, International Delight,

and Signatures Select. Available now through March 24th on pickup or delivery orders only. Restrictions apply. See website for full terms and conditions. I had had before or... Yeah. I don't know. It's hard for a can-dry.

I'm a fruit-flavored person. Oh, you know what? Maybe like the sour punch straws because I was big into sour power straws. And I remember, like, they didn't have them everywhere, but they would have sour punch every once in a while. and those were just too, like, they were too sweet and not sour enough. I like a good sour, like, I'm going to have sour candy.

Like, I wanted to hurt me a little bit. Yeah, a little bit. You know? I don't want it to be like this, like, thing is like, oh, this might as well not have been sour at all. Like, what have you, what'd you do? Yeah. Like, I always wish shower worms were a little bit more sour.

Like, they feel like they could, they could stand. They have a little bit of powers. They have versions of it. Like, there's like an electric one. There's that, like, the biggest brand. Something with the tea. I forgot what it's called. trolley. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So they have like an electric thing that you'd like. They have a

version of that where it's more sour. Um, because I've, I thought about that too. We're like, oh, you know, I want a little more of a kick. Uh, but man, I will say there's some sour worms that taste like a butt and I was actually very like, like, did somebody rub this in their ass? And it was kind of, because like, I'm a connoisseur or sour gummy worms. I fucking love them. So I'll try different brands and ass. And ass. And I was like, oh, this, this specific. is ass that I can't believe. This is ass. I'll keep eating it because I also don't mind eating ass.

Yeah, this is ass. I just don't want my sour gummer ones to taste like ass. That's why I'm actually mad. Well, you know, what's interesting is that like, I think blue raspberry has a flavor

is not real, and it's derived from reverse engineered ass. That makes sense. Blue raspberry, what are they called blow pops? You know, the ones have the gum in the middle? You know those. Blue pops.

Oh, blue raspberry. is real, they have to be real, right? No, they're not. I think it's like pink lemonade, right? Yeah. Blue raspberry, uh, You get those blow pops, man, the, the anus. Blue raspberry blow pops are fucking phenomenal to me.

I haven't had one of those in ages. I think they are, right? Nope. Of course not. Yeah, yeah. So, so, so.

Nope. Blue raspberry, syrup. So it's not just blue raspberry. It's other things, too. But apparently, like, yeah, artificial. Raspberry. So artificial raspberry in general is made from Beaver's anal gland secretions.

Ah. Hmm. I'm going to get so much more of it now. Yeah. Now that I know this. Beaver specifically. Oh, it's based off a real thing called white bark raspberry. Shut the fuck up. A deep purplish blue, right? Oh, the deep purplish blue in there.

He's got his own what he's talking about. He doesn't even know what he's talking about. He doesn't even know what deep purplish blue means. Yeah. Deep purple. What are you fucking, what are you stupid? Would you listen to music right now? What are you listening to music? What the fuck was that about? I don't know, whatever.

Yeah, and they're just effectively blackberries. 50 blow pops for $15. That seems kind of expensive. That's expensive, yes, pricey. For one blow pop? For one, yeah, for $1.50. You get a blow pop and you get the owl, too. Yeah, you get the, if I got the owl, then, okay.

Okay, I would absolutely buy that. I'd love to have an owl. I want to know. They're kind of shitty birds, though, but I like them. They look so cool, man. They're so slow. Apparently, like, the slowest flying birds. They're really slow.

I mean, I don't need them to fucking. Who do I do? They're really not fast. They need them to rob shit or something. We go to see through their heads. That's so cool. That is creepy. I love that you could, I love that you could, like,

peer into their fucking ears and see their eyes. That's so great. It's like, what a, it's almost like, um. And they're apparently pretty decent pets, too. Like, I don't know. I wouldn't want to have one as a pet. I think that's not right. Being able to see an owl's eye from their ear kind of feels like,

um, you know how like, Derek, you know how like when you're editing a video, like, uh, the timeline is kind of like a mess. Uh-huh.

But like the, the facade of like what you're trying to show is like, oh, that's exactly how I wanted to look. But then you look at the timeline, it's a complete. Yeah, it looks chaotic.

Yeah. That's what it seems like with the owl. It's like, oh, it looks fine. And then you get like close to it and you're like, oh man, like that's that's like not where that should be. Like it's crazy that I could see behind this. It's crazy you could see behind the face of an animal. That is a little like naturally just by looking at it.

Like that's crazy to me. It's not okay. It's not okay. It's not at all. They're also weirdly taught. You ever see them run? I don't think that's in an owl run. Dude, it's fucking weird.

It is the weird. Oh, let me see if I could fight. They're the weirdest animals. probably ever. I like how they look when they're wet. They twist their fucking heads around. Oh, wet owls? They look silly.

They look really silly when they're wet. Because you realize how tiny they are and how much fur, feathers they have. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Ew, dude, I hate like it jaunts. It's so weird to see a bird run because they usually like hop, you know?

Look at this. It depends on what kind of bird, right? I put it in the chat. It's like a YouTube short. It's one of the first things that comes out. They literally run actually. Hell yeah. Dude, I love this.

that. Like they actually... It seems so fucking unnatural. I love that. It's because there's like, there's such a particular kind of bird, you know, like there's certain the water, um, birds like waddle and shit. You're like fucking, pat, pat, pat, pat, but I guess I've seen a turkey do that too, actually, but I think it was more of like a playful thing, which is weird. It makes me, I'm like, man, why are we eating these things? These things are fucking like they're dancing and shit. They're having fun. Same with duckies. Seeing little ducks follow people. is so cute. And then people kill him.

And I'm like, oh man, he just shows up and then fucking shoots the duck and somehow it shoots your fucking face too. Yeah, I saw a video of a- He shoots a wide cone. It's like, it's like,

you get the indicator like in Hades. He's going to shoot over here. Man, he's got that. I saw a video of this girl on a golf course like shooting a, like she's doing a drive or something. Yeah. She hits a golf ball and it,

it hits a duck in the neck. Oh my God. And it just like it's, it's like waddling around it like flops into the water and it's like bro oh that's you broke it's all for a game bet she traumatized her offer i hope so all for a game in an area of turn around and didn't even look at it too like i would be

staring so intently i'd be like i gotta she turned that that made me mad like you just you just you're like oh yeah whatever that's a that's a level of privilege that sometimes i'm like damn what does that feel like care about animals what does i feel like to not give a shit about anything except for what you're doing. That feels... Now see, here's the thing about that. You kill the duck.

But it's an accident. Okay. You gotta eat it, right? You gotta eat it, yeah, absolutely. At that point, yeah. Absolutely. To not be disrespectful. If you're not the animal, you gotta eat it.

But we're not the ones to talk about that, though. I mean, we got feather, we got feather blood in us. We're different. But if I, uh, if I killed a, uh, if I killed a, uh, if I killed a, uh, if I'd probably wouldn't even wait to eat it. That's crazy. I'd probably eat it on the spot. Pounce on it like, what's James McAvey in fucking which one of those movies?

Split? Yeah, yeah, yeah. If you took a picture of me eating that duck on that golf course, it would look like, I would look like Saturn. What? Like the image of the image of Saturn or is Uranus? Uranus. Is it Uranus technically or is it Saturn? It's Saturn.

It's Saturn. eating his kid eating his kid eating his son it's eating the famous painting actually I don't have that in my in my it's not in my I can't picture it

yeah it's a famous it's a famous painting I'll probably know it when I see it yeah it's Saturn devouring his son oh that's such an ugly picture it's so ugly dude

it's so it is a crazy fucking image. The idea that someone painted this. It's really ugly. It really bothers me, man. The hell's wrong with Spanish people, man. It's even ugly by

that time standard. It's like, that's a hideous looking image. Francisco really good coloring, though. Really good color. What the fuck was Francisco Goya doing? He saw this. He saw this. He was probably trying not to eat his son. He was probably trying not to eat his son. He was probably trying

not to eat his son. He was on the, you know what he reminds me of? he was trying not to eat and he was fighting the temptation he had this intense watering oh man I gotta I'm trying to not eat my son so I'm gonna paint out

I'm gonna get it out through painting yeah I like I like to think he's probably looking at him like I just like to think he saw this I like to think he saw this happen

on like the subway or something ah the subway and what like an 1100 the sun's figure is interesting too though because like he's already torn apart but why why is the sun like look at the ratio of its body

versus its buttocks. What the fuck's going on there? He was thick. I mean, clearly. He had a, he had a thick son. That is a, that is a choice

to draw it like that. No fucking way. This motherfucker is having to. He looks so disgusting. Is this real? What is this? You remember that guy going viral in that band Pentegram

where he has like, the fucking the, the, the fans blowing on him. He's like old dude in his eyes are wired. Yeah. He's like a rape.

Yeah. That's basically the same thing. Dude, that guy looks like something that Gerelt would kill. It's crazy. They should put him in the fucking the new Netflix one because nobody's watching, I guess. It was so bad. It was so bad. But it had one really good moment.

Did they, are they closing it? Was that just like, oh, we're going to end it here? There's one last season for some reason. That's unfortunate, I guess. Because I unfortunately have not seen. anyone that was even, even before it dropped. I didn't see anyone else like, I can't wait to see this. Hello, hello, I'm Malcolm Gladwell,

host of the podcast Smart Talks with IBM. I recently sat down with IBM's chairman and CEO, Arvin Krishna. And I asked him, how can companies use AI to its fullest potential to create smarter business? My one advice to that, pick areas you can scale. Don't pick the shiny little toys on the side. For example, If anybody has more than 10% of what they had for customer service 10 years ago,

they're already five years behind. If anybody is not using AI to make their developers who write software 30% more productive today, with the goal of being 70% more productive. Yeah. Wow. So we are not asking our clients to be the first experiment on it. We say, you can leverage what we did. We're happy to bring out all our learnings, including what needs to change in the process,

because the biggest change is not technology, is getting people to accept that there's a different way to do things. To listen to the full conversation, visit IBM.com slash smart talks. Hey, it's Ryan Sechrest for Albertsons and Safeway. It's stockup savings time now through March 31st. Spring in for store-wide deals and earn four times of points. Look for in-store tags to earn on eligible items from Celsius, Body Armor. Oira Ida, Silk, Capri-San, Bavarian Meets, and Charmin. Then clip the offer in the app for automatic event-long savings.

Stack up those rewards to save even more. Enjoy savings on top of savings when you shop in-store or online for easy drive-up and go pick-up or delivery. Restrictions apply. See website for full terms and conditions. I was like, oh, that sucks. Wait a minute. Wait a minute. It's Francisco Goya?

Like the, like the beans. The beans? I mean. That's crazy. He's the official goyam person. Maybe that's why he was eating, like, so his son fell in all the spices. He felt like his son fell in a vat of adobe. And Saturn just like couldn't help himself.

And Goya was like, there was an advertisement for the, for the seasoning. He was like, at the bottom, like the caption has been lost at time. But underneath Saturn eating his son and said, Goya, seasoning so good, you would eat. your son if he fell into if he was seasoned with it. And it has a gap too. Has the gap too. If he was somebody in the audience, please make that.

Somebody, uh, I want to see that, um, propaganda poster. That's good. Or that advertisement. Excuse me. Um, young call. All right, let's give a lot to the different question. Young Colin forcing his hands into the vagina of a random woman and ripping her in half. Nice. Uh, what's up? He's just, what's, wrote it. He's What's up, Chris Kingston? And Derek, I know y'all like hearing from listeners with serious jobs. And I've previously told y'all I work in the OR. So the operating room, as you don't know.

I do what's called sterile processing. And while I typically don't interact with patients, I sure do have a story for you. Once I went up to the OR with the weekend supervisor and saw the entire weekend crew huddled behind the OR desk. We asked what's up and were pushed behind the desk and told to look under the computer. This patient had three baby cats. What? This patient had three baby carrots floating in his bladder as he had sounded himself with them so hard he got them in there. I later got.

Jesus Christ. I later got this case in DeContam and had to. Oh, Deacon Tamm. Yeah, I was like, what the fuck? Okay, decontamination and had to clean baby carrot flakes off of a urology cisto set. I don't know what a lot of those words mean. I got to be honest. Sweet dreams, cunts.

That is fucking crazy. Sounding yourself with a baby carrot is outrageous. Is that the guy with the yucca, remember that, Chris? No, what? The guy with the yucca up his ass in fucking Costa Rica. Someone put an uke up their ass? He put a yuker, yeah, put a yuck up the ass. That is fucking, I mean, that's-asshole looked like bubble gum afterwards.

It was crazy. Well, look, that's crazy, but I feel like, I feel like getting... The video of it is really interesting is it's, they have to get it out, right? So they have to try to get it out. And the guy has to push it out. Using food is, pushes it out. It's so archaic, bro. The doctor goes, I deos meal as it comes out as asshole.

I'm going to say, I'm going to go ahead and say, I'm going to go ahead and go out on a limb here and say the carrots are crazier to me. I just like food. I think so. I think sounding is crazier than... Why do people still use food to insert in themselves? They freeze the food and then they inserted themselves. But it's like, why... I understand in an archaic society, that's all you had.

You know, like, there's, there was no actual sex toys. There are sex toys now. Derek, Derek, you have no more... You no longer consist of a primal urge, that's why. Yeah. You want to modernize so bad. You're so quick to abandon. to abandon tradition.

Baby carrots is so crazy, dude. You're so quick to abandon who you were. Was I ever the urge to put in food in my peehole? Your grandpa would be like, I'm gonna pop open his grave meagraps. Dig him up, you speak with dad, you get three questions.

Yeah, ask that nigga. Ask that nigga exactly what he did. And then, yeah, hey, you ever put food in your pee hole? nigga, of course Yes Is that why you're bothering me? Dude, this is freaky.

I'm dead. I'm talking to me. It's the middle of putting fucking a canol open my p-hole with Satan. I want to get back to that shit. The thing is, it's like sounding can't feel good. Like, there's no way that feels good. Like, that's what's so confusing.

I think it feels good. I just think that it's a feel good that no way we just don't want. I feel like it hurts and people. Well, yeah. Yeah. Like, maybe. I guess I guess it must be right I guess that's really

is the only option I'm gonna read this question just because I think it's you know somebody somebody paid to ride it Gears X Warrior wrote in he says When will it end? What exactly your pain?

Because never You got a long ride brother I mean no I'm kidding You'll get there You'll be fine John Ron Tofer wrote in He says

Is Eldrish horror More scary or less scary To be blind people it's kind of a good question actually probably probably more scary yeah because they would have to imagine it because I will say like the second I saw an image of Cthulu I was like

oh you know what I mean like It's like a squid adorable You're adorable Oh it's cool Come here That starts cooing at you Would you like to hang out with me and Anthony Soprano?

You're gonna eat my son Kingston He's so cool Like what I don't know about the Cahula guy He gotta Kind of make my head hurt when I look at him I don't understand I don't understand

When I look at him I want to beat my wife even more What I don't want to beat my wife now I don't get it I don't get it I want to hit AJ really fucking hard When I look at the Cthulu I don't understand

I really hate my son I don't understand I fucking hate my son a lot I can't stand little motherfucker I'm a fucking bitch I'd have to kill himself A little bitch A little son of mine

I ever kill themselves You know what I mean A little son of mine's going to kill himself without me killing him first. Yeah, yeah. That's why he was really pissed up. You motherfucker. You almost robbed me of me killing you. That's a little fucked up.

You dumb little bitch. Your daughter, you said there's a black person. He says to fucking a million yon. It's kind of fucked up. I'm going to kill it too. I'll kill you, buddy. Can we reboot? We're going to ask, we're going to ask, reboot the Sopranos.

He's just going to kill everyone. We're going to also use, speak with dead. and brain resurrect freaking what you call. James Gettofini. Nicker, rise, nigga. He comes up. He's like, what? It was a character.

I'm not really Tony Sorano. I'm not fucking Tony Sabrano. I'm like, I'm sorry you are. You're fucked. Also, I was dead. I saw him as military personnel

and like something else and I'm like, it just looks like Anthony Fantano. I mean, Fantano, it's great. That's great. It looks like Tony's

it looks like Tony Soprano. He looks like Tony Soprano cosplay. Is it Fanteno a huge guy? Isn't he mad big? He's pretty big. He's like six something, pretty thick. Oh, here's a good one. Gay little beetles. We'll get him. We're going to get him. Gay little beetle borgs, wrote in. He says, hey, fat, black, and Puerto Rican.

I went to the club for the first time recently and slowly realized that most of my friends are on the spectrum. I tried to talk to strangers and bombed hilariously. I was drunk, but learned that asking someone if they've heard of Greg tech. parentheses extremely complex satisfactory slash, oh my god. So it's a fucking, it's a mod for Minecraft. Isn't exactly conducive or isn't exactly conducive to making friends

or finding a hookup. Yeah, you're gonna wanna. Yeah, man. I'm curious how old you are. Because club for the first time, that seems like, for somebody who I would consider themselves a nerd, right? Yeah. who's talking about

Minecraft mods in public with strangers. I would guess you're maybe around 24, 25. That's, I mean, look, nobody's at the club to talk about Minecraft, really.

Like no one's, even people who are don't want to do that. Yeah. Because you can't, you can't hear anybody in the club anyway. I'm curious what he means by club because you might like there this might be like a misnomer.

Like a proper club. Are you, do you have conversations at clubs? Yeah, you're trying to get put. I feel like I've never had a conversation to a club because I can't hear any. It's very hard. Yeah, because you're trying to get put. What do you mean? You go then you try to talk to girls. You talk to the

conversations. That happens. I get, but you're more like screaming vague things. You know, where it's just like, oh, I can't hear you over the music. So I'm going to say something general. It's like, hey. You like the music? Yeah, that's usually what it is.

How are you doing tonight? Hey, I'm okay. Does anybody know you're here? Has anyone roofied you yet? Are you good? I have a really funny. I have, I have, I have, I've had a lot of, Quailude. I went to a party.

Does anybody know you're here right now? Does anybody have your location? That's so crazy. No. Oh, word. I went to a party a couple of years ago. I think it was, I think it might have been Alana's birthday, but it was at like a bar and it was so loud. And it was like a lot of people there and like,

Eddie, I was having a conversation with, I think Eddie Burbank and I think Nikki Jakey. And they are tall. Okay. Like they're much, well, they're taller than I am,

right? Sure. And like, it was so loud in there that they were talking to me. And I only kind of understood, like, I couldn't hear them because they weren't like, they were literally speaking over me.

And like I have to look up. Like my ears are tilted towards the speakers. It was a whole fucking situation. So like, I remember kind of just not. nodding along and saying just things that I thought made sense to the general vibe of what they were talking about. Hello, hello.

I'm Malcolm Gladwell, host of the podcast Smart Talks with IBM. I recently sat down with IBM's chairman and CEO, Arvin Krishna. And I asked him, how can companies use AI to its fullest potential to create smarter business? My one advice to that, pick areas you can scale. Don't pick the shiny little toys on the side. For example. If anybody has more than 10% of what they had for customer service 10 years ago, they're already five years behind.

If anybody is not using AI to make their developers who write software 30% more productive today, with the goal of being 70% more productive. Yeah. Wow. So we are not asking our clients to be the first experiment on it. We say you can leverage what we did. We're happy to bring out all our learnings, including what needs to change in the process,

because the biggest change is not technology, is getting people to accept that there's a different way to do things. To listen to the full conversation, visit IBM.com slash smart talks. Hey, it's Ryan Seacrest for Albertsons and Safeway. It's stockup savings time now through March 31st. for storewide deals and earn four times of points. Look for in-store tags to earn on eligible items from Celsius,

Body Armor, ORAIDA, Silk, Capri-San, Bavarian Meets, and Charmin. Then clip the offer in the app for automatic event-long savings. Stack up those rewards to save even more. Enjoy savings on top of savings when you shop in-store or online for easy drive-up and go pick up or delivery. Restrictions apply. See website for full terms and conditions. Like using like vague context clues and like, oh, I think that syllable means that

Oh, that inflection, I think They were kind of like, Chris is gay, right? And you were like, yeah, right? Okay, yeah. Yeah, I'm gay. I was like, ah. Yeah, gay. Uh-huh, uh-huh, yeah.

Look those little fucking gay guys. What was he doing? That's all they're saying. This guy's so gay. I would start saying slurs and then I know the music would cut eventually. Yeah, it would cut eventually hard. But it was just very funny because I just remember being like, oh, man, like, I'm,

I'm going, I'm moving through this conversation purely on instinct. Because I just don't know what the fuck we're talking about. I earnestly doubt. I wish I knew how to leave a con, like when a conversation has happened and I feel uncomfortable, I get scared and I stay even though I don't want to be there anymore. I just leave. I did that for a while.

I'll leave like five seconds after like I'm not being addressed. I'll just turn around 180 and then I leave. It's great. I do like to talk to people. Like I do like having conversations at parties and stuff, but it's just like there is a point where I'm like okay I don't I don't mind just go I just I don't mind just walk away being like I'm gonna go somewhere else yeah because that's the point of a party really like if if I'm not gonna just talk to the same person the whole time a lot of people I think it's funny talking about me talking to you just walking away like somebody's like hey what's going on man he's I wouldn't walk away in mid sentence I would usually you should that'd be interesting definitely it's usually I would find like some like I'm gonna go get food or like I'm gonna go grab this or I'm gonna go grab that there's always like there's always a way to peel away from a conversation I'm really bad at it man I'm really bad at it man I'm really bad at I get really nervous. I start stuttering.

I start sweating. You start peeing your pants. I start pissing their pants. You start pissing their pants. You start pissing their pants. You start shitting your dipey. You start crying. My dippy gets really big and blows up the back of me like a fucking volcano.

Like in SpongeBob. The music starts playing too. I don't remember that. I don't remember that. I don't remember that scene. Oh, really? Is that a scene in a volcano and SpongeBob? Crackettoa

Oh, oh, when he's being the super Yeah, yeah, okay And I said, but that Imagine that but shit out my ass That shit out, okay, I got you now Perfect Thanks, I'm glad you guys are paying it again Yeah, dude, I mean

You shoot KFC out of bad Come on You started it Did I? Did I really? Did you see that AI thing of the cop fucking putting

Kool-Aid in the lake and then a bunch of niggas just show up and he's like, I knew this would work. And then it cuts right before he shoots one of them. Have you seen that? I have not seen that. It's it.

He even made Jordan be like, that's crazy. Jordan never reacts to anything, really. Because you've seen it all. And he was like, that's crazy. Jordan's always sending fucking insane.

Jordan is the only person that can one up me in wild shit. Sure. Yeah. Like he is the only person that can one. Well, there's other people. Like, Lyle can want me always. Jordan can. I haven't gotten that from him. Like, he's probably Monica can for sure. And Monica can. And Zach. Zach has sent me stuff that I've been like Zach. What's this page? What is the page drawn to find this? Fucking big and balls. It's just nudes. It's just like it's just like it's just a picture. This is a picture. This is a

this is a picture by balls. My dick and balls. This picture of someone with my balls, exactly. These are literally my balls. These aren't exactly by it. These aren't exactly my balls, but they're pretty close. They're damn they are identical. So if you can see, if you see a picture of this guy's balls,

just though they're basically bide. So you can see my balls. I actually, I like the, I like the idea of trying to describe your dick and balls to someone by finding using other lines. That doesn't look the same. Yeah.

This is, this is not exactly. this is not exactly it, but it's like, it's a damn near price, it's like 98% accuracy. It's like a pretty close approximation. Imagine, imagine imagine this, but like the head is a little bit more ovular. It's a little bit more, more like an oval. So like, imagine, like, take this but make the head oval. It's, that's exactly my peepee.

It's so crazy because it's like, you Google, you Google my balls. You Google my balls first, and then you go from there. How would you even fucking, like, how would you feel if you Googled? How would you feel if you Googled my penis and your dick showed up? Well. I'd be frightened. That's already a problem

I've run into already So that is right that his dick is circulating around the internet That is true and no one will ever know Yeah I'll never know It's like serial number tattooed on it Unless it says Kingston on it You look under the fucking head is

You You Jameson That's crazy It's like Andy Yeah yeah yeah yeah All right let's see what do we got here I am gonna ask Anthony Fantano If he'll um

star in the reboot of the Sopranos. And not like a prequel or anything, you know, like I'm talking about it. Not like a continuation. Yeah. This assassination is. Like the scene lights back up and it's Anthony. And he's like, what's going on? I really enjoyed Super Butterfly.

Had a nice dinner with the, well, after I was done listening to the journey. It's had a nice dinner. Wait, he's doing an impression. He's doing an impression. Yeah. He's still. Okay.

Okay. Okay. I see. I see. Nice dinner. But like it doesn't look like him at all. It's just Anthony Fattano, tweeting out the voice.

This assassination attempt? It's not good. It's not good. You've got the platt on. You know what's about to be a bang. Light one. I'm feeling a light one on this, Stromboli.

Transition. Transition. Transition. He says that whatever. He says that whatever he kills somebody. He's trans. This is because he's transition. themselves into the afterlife.

He was like a train. Sition. Kill you. Let's, I'm going to pull up, I'm going to pull up his account and I'm going to, I'm going to send him a voice note and pitch it to him. We'll see,

we'll see what he says. Yeah, okay. That's crazy. I'm scrolling through. We have to go back a little bit for questions, so I have to scroll quite a bit. And,

uh, the Patreon app or Patreon. Basically, the website's really slow on iPad for. some fucking reason. Let's see. Let's see. Okay, so this is from a week ago, but

Jelaine McWell, how is it Galane? Is it Galane? I guess it doesn't matter. He cares. Galane Maxwell's horse named Bubba rode in. Says, hey, twink, twunk, and some black cock. I know how cartoonishly wild these Epsen emails are and how unlikely it'll be that anyone faces consequences. However, my question is,

what is something so ridiculous that would actually lead to Trump supporters abandoning him on mass? I think if he was earnestly gay and there was video of him being gay. I think if there was video of him being like, I don't know, he's got to be like praising a penis. You know, like it's, it can't even be like a three second video of him sucking because people will be like that's AI or like they'd be like who amongst us hasn't accidentally done this once. That'll be like the excuses. You know what I mean?

It has to be like him like worshiping at the other room. I really don't think anything we're doing. I think, seriously. Well, there's a lot of people already kind of abandoning him. Yeah. I think. But those are, but those are people. on a moderate side.

20% of the base would never abandon him no matter what. True. I think that the rest would. But there are 30, there's like 30 something percent of, 35% of people like who are like into it. But then like I think like about like maybe 15% of those people could be.

100% I agree. I agree. They could be. But there's there's definitely, you're right. There's definitely people who are just going to be like, yeah. I was just watching a cult thing.

And this. Dude, I don't remember. I've been in Utah. or something like that. But just to cut it really fast, guy starts a cult, tries to marry a fucking eight-year-old. And like the grandparents are like, okay with it and shit. Because they're, it's, it's just like, I don't know what it is about a cult that makes the most obviously fucked up thing that are like, oh, sure. Yeah, you can, yeah, go ahead and marry that fucking child. You're like, oh, we won't, I won't touch her till she's 16, I promise. Ooh.

Like this is, how do you go along with this? Sick a bear on him. Just sick a bear on him. Sicker bear. I mean, get him smoky. I got a sick of a bear on. I think the only thing that will do that for them is literally after he leaves. Like after he's out of office.

Maybe. And then a light will shine. I'm like, oh, crap, he was doing all of this. I don't know. They still might think the Democrats are because, you know, because this is what they're. Once the Democrats are in charge again, they're going to be, hey, why is

inflation gone? You know what I mean? They're going to be like that. And it's because it doesn't work that way. You can slow it. You can slow it. You can stop it from fucking us in the ass is hard. But they're going to be like, why isn't everything perfect?

And I'm like, nigg, was anything perfect when your guy was in? I felt like you wolves. I felt it. My fifies thought so. My fifies. Jesus. It's getting blighted. Someone direct the lightning bolt into your fucking house.

Oh, this is funny. Derek Hand wrote in. So, so black, are you mentioning the Sopranos a lot lately? Have you seen, have you seen, uh,

the YouTube poops and up in the club memes? How about that prick's face when he saw the get? I don't know any of this shit. I'm, I'm completely alien to the Sopranos. I'm sure there's, I've seen a, but the main things that I've seen are the video,

like, it's usually like, somebody, I don't know who it is, it's some character being like, Christopher. How do I beat? Hello, hello. I'm Malcolm Gladwell, host of Smart Talks with IBM. I recently spoke with IBM's new director of research,

Jake Embatta. We discussed his vision for the future of quantum computing. At IBM research, what we always do is answer what is the future of computing, whether it's coming up with new algorithms, coming up with better AI, coming up with quantum or coming up with just how do different accelerators go together. It's our DNA to answer the question of what is the future.

Isn't it a perfect problem for IBM because you kind of need to have a legacy of building stuff? Yes. Building actual physical machines. Yeah, it's why I came to IBM. I wanted the experience, the culture of building hard things that others have not done before. Where do you imagine we are in the timeline of this technology? There will come a point when it will mature. Right?

My cell phone is a mature technology at this point. How far are we from that point with quantum? By 2029, we'll build the first fault-tolerant quantum computer. That is one that can run a very, very large, large problem. To learn how IBM is building the future of computing, visit IBM.com slash quantum. Hey, it's Ryan Seacrest for Albertsons and Safeway. It's stockup savings time now through March 31st. Spring in for store-wide deals and earn four times the points.

Look for in-store tags to earn on eligible items from Celsius, Body Armor, ORA-Ida, Silk, Capri-Sung, Bavarian Meets, and Charmin. Then clip the offer in the app for automatic event-long savings. Stack up those rewards to save even more. Enjoy savings on top of savings when you shop in-store or online for easy drive-up and go pick up or delivery. Restrictions apply. for full terms and conditions.

Silk song on the heart. You know what I mean? It's like usually that kind of thing. Oh, yeah, yeah. I know who you're talking about. Yeah, it's like, uh, I don't know who, I don't know exactly like what I might be saying the wrong name, but it's two characters in the Sopranos and like they're basically like being game facts for each other.

I've seen those. But those are the only ones I've seen. I haven't seen like somebody sent me recently. Like I posted on Twitter some fucking AI thing of fucking, um, what's his face? Tony Soprano being like Christopher. And he's sitting. in a wart hog. He's like, we're going to play real life Halo.

I got sent this. I'm not even excited. I'm putting it in the chat because it's fucking ridiculous. But I sent, I've had, I had this sent to me. I can't remember what day it was. I think it was like,

whatever the 22nd was. I checked my like message requests and like my DMs. I had this video sent to me like over 200 times by like several different people, like random people that I'd never heard of. I love that. I was just like, why? Chris, like, Halo? Send to Chris.

Yeah, send to Chris. Yeah. It's such an ridiculous. Real life Halo. It looks so good. It's so dumb. The way he enunciates it is so steep. Christopher.

Yeah, they're going to play real life Halo. It's nice. I mean, it's AI, but it's nice. You know what I mean? Looks nice. I mean, it's a good premise, I guess. It's just, it's fucking ridiculous. There's a guy, though, that,

masterful editing he's putting something soprano and everything in Skyrim. You might have seen these. He's in Skyrim. Oh, yeah, yeah. I've seen, so I haven't seen them just because I haven't watched the show

and so I feel like I would lose a lot of the content. But I've seen him do that with other, like I've seen like Frank Reynolds in Balder's Gate 3. And fucking everything. Yeah, something like that and like Frank Reynolds in a lot of things. He's been really good in that world.

He'd be an interesting person having that world. Yeah. There's a lot of good ones. The best one I saw was he was in God of War, Ragnarok or the first one or whatever Tony Soprano it was like masterfully done especially like oh a fight scene that Tony Soprano is a fight scene and then he works it into him like fighting I don't remember if it was balder I think or something it was whatever it was it looked I was

like this is way too good like you're spending way too much time on this dude this really like these editors yeah Tony Soprano and God of War Ragnar. Yeah yeah that's it yeah it's oh um there's uh if you um um He mirrors it with like a Heimdahl They're the fight with Heimdahl There's like, it's perfect I was like this is really good This is no this guy's in a

His username is fucking garbage And it makes me so mad But it's Eli underscore handle underscore B dot wave But he does amazing fucking work I mean it's it's good to have like a name that's so shit That's That people don't care And they're still willing to seek you out

Right Because your work is so good But like Yeah like Shrek and Kingdom Come Deliverance too. Oh, it's crazy. There's a lot of these I haven't seen, but I bet they're all good. Pee Wee Herman and Cympunk 277, I have to see that.

Dumb and Dumber and Death Stranding. Yeah, they're all so well done. Like, masterful editing stuff. I never thought. I'm going to binge it shit. Home alone and Hitman 3. Oh, my God. That's awesome.

I never thought about it. He's got the barcode on the fucking backpack. Oh, really? That's hilarious. That's sick. Yeah, I'm going to, how am I not subscribed? Yeah, I got to binge this. I got a bit.

I've never, yeah. I already forgot the name. I already forgot his username. That's a fucking horrible username. If you, if you search Frank Reynolds in, right, yeah,

you know, you'll find it. But it's Eli underscore handle underscore B. dot wave. But, yeah, it's, I highly recommend that shit.

It's, it's, the stuff that I've seen is just like so master. And I guess it's like, it's more impressive if you, if you're an editor, I guess. Like,

you'd probably just look at it and be like, ah, whatever, it's like, it's like, dude, like the editing is fucking amazing. Yeah.

it really is like I'm envious of like how good it is but yeah anyway I got a I have to watch Tony Soprano had got yeah the original got a war yeah it's fucking insane

it's so good like it's Leslie Nielsen in Detroit become human I've seen that one you did I Joe Biden in Fallout Fort yo I'm so behind I haven't seen the overwhelming majority of these

Same. I really only thought there was like a handful. I really only thought it was so impressive that I figured like, oh, there's only like maybe like one of these every once in a while. Right. That's exactly. Exactly. I thought. Yeah. But there's kind of a lot. He's fucking... Yeah, three weeks ago, one months ago, two months ago, three months ago. So it takes about a month it looks like. That's fucking crazy. Anyway, let's move on. Corinth, or Corinth wrote this message. Writing in, he says, this message goes out to the community as a whole, as I'm in desperate need of finding a clip from the show and having Chris read. this allowed may help me find it. I'll try to help. Does anyone know the episode where the boys were talking about the Mike Tyson Jake Paul fight getting delayed and Chris pulled a perfect Mike Tyson impression out of his ass just to say

I had bad lobster? The delivery was so on point and if there's one clip that should go on all their social media is this one. I haven't thought about that. I didn't think the impression was that good to be honest. This is why I didn't clip it. I thought it was funny. But like I don't know. I don't even remember what the fuck

I feel like I remember Somebody will have to do it I feel like I remember being impressed But also I kind of don't remember at the same time Yeah exactly I'm sure it was

It was good because it was quick And it felt accurate But I don't know Because it probably Hopefully there's a time stamp In the comic section of the episode Yeah someone will find it Yeah

You know Shout out to Taco also by the way He was making all those Oh yeah Episodic Episottically making YouTube poops. Yeah, it's kind of crazy.

It's crazy. It's an honor. Absolutely. But let's see. What is this? Oh, I read that already. Oh, is this a double post? Oh, it might be. What the fuck is this shit?

I'm gonna send a Fantano a message while you're finding the one. Oh, my God. Hey, man. I just want to run something by you real quick. So the, you know, the Sopranos ended, I don't know, what, 20 some years ago. And we're thinking of there being a continuation of the show. And this is Chris Reagan.

You remember him and Tom Sweet. Do not mention me at all. I'm sorry. You've already been mentioned. So would you be interested in playing, you know, because your name is very close to Tony Soprano? You know, I know you're Anthony Soprano. It's a very close name.

Would you be interested in taking the role? You take up the mantle And all you got to do is just loosely do the accent And then you kind of can also still do your job at the same time If you want to review stuff Like review a Gabagool or something Is that something you'd be interested in? Yeah, no money, no money, no pay

No money, no pay. No money, no money, nothing, nothing. Did you actually send that to Anthony Fantano? I did. He's going to block you. He's got a block. I actually, I wouldn't even mind. I'd be like, I get it.

I get it. I get it. I'd block me too. I've tried to block me. I've tried to block me, but I can't. I'm always stalking myself. I have not, uh, let's see. The last time I've talked to him was, oh, March of this year.

So, you know. Oh, really? Yeah. I haven't messaged him and I haven't spoken to him in fucking years. It's just like a quick check in. If something pops up, it's like, oh, hey, you know, like that. Yeah, yeah. I'm really bad at that.

I'm always like, yeah, these people don't want to hear from me. I think it becomes a stale. mate dude like it's like oh right no one no one's here from anybody no one cares about anybody everybody's fucking liar everybody's a liar everybody's a cheat i agree everybody is gonna catch everybody's gonna crazy fucking relax brother everybody's gonna get fucking what they deserve every single person steal i've fucking eddie guerrero i love that typical he ruined a generation of children absolutely i was one of them absolutely one of them What'd you got, Chris?

I don't know. Oh, well, here's... Here's one thing. The snark tank is powerfully racist road and he says, hello, my favorite racist, Derek and Chris. Do you guys ever think about expanding the snar gang into more than just a podcast? Are you happy with where it is now? Gay side note, I just upgraded my membership.

And when you read my name out loud, it made and when you read my name out lied it made me smile thanks for the last i appreciate it uh he got back to me already are you serious very simple lull i don't think i have time for this right now tell him make time make time in all caps this is important i'm going to send him a picture of martin scorsese and be like he should come on the show oh yeah oh that'd be funny i haven't seen him in a long time yeah i'll ask him i'll ask him I'll be like, hey, I'm sure he's, fuck it. I can't imagine.

He does, he seems like he's doing shit all the time, but I'm like, yeah, that literally doesn't stop working. It's madness. Can you, it's impressive? Give us an hour of your time while you're supposed to be sleeping. I'm going to ask him that. While you're going to be sleeping, a parent.

Give us your time to talk about bullshit. No. Anyway, uh, so they were, so, do you remember the question? No, not. I can't believe we got back to you already. Yeah. That's a way quick. Do you guys ever think about expanding the Star Hanks because more than just a podcast or are you happy where it is now?

Basically it's the gist of it. Yeah, it really is just a matter of like bandwidth, dude. Like it's, it really is just like what. So I, what I want to do is I want to open a brothel where it's just Kingston. It's Kingston chained in a room by his fucking neck. And people could just go in there and just like do whatever they want to them. Hello, hello. I'm Malcolm Gladwell, host of Smart Talks with IBM.

I recently spoke with IBM's new director of research, Jake M. Beta. We discussed his vision for the future of quantum computing. At IBM research, what we always do is answer what is the future of computing, whether it's coming up with new algorithms, coming up with better AI, coming up with quantum, or coming up with just how do different accelerators go together. It's our DNA to answer the question of what is the future. Isn't it a perfect problem for IBM because you kind of need to, have a legacy of building stuff,

building actual physical machines. Yeah, it's why I came to IBM. I wanted the experience, the culture of building hard things that others have not done before. Where do you imagine we are in the timeline of this technology? There will come a point when it will mature.

My cell phone is a mature technology at this point. How far are we from that point? with quantum. By 2029, we'll build the first fault-tolerant quantum computer. That is one that can run a very, very large, large problem. To learn how IBM is building the future of computing, visit IBM.com slash quantum. Hey, it's Ryan Sechrest for Albertsons and Safeway. Ready to save, it's time for cyber deals. Put a spring in your step with fresh savings that brighten the season. These exclusive week-long digital offers on your favorite products are only available when you shop. online. Save on eligible items from Kettle, Chabani, Quaker, Skippy, Hidden Valley,

International Delight, Frito Lay, and Signatures Select. Available now through March 24th on pickup or delivery orders only. Restrictions apply. See website for full terms and conditions. He'll get like a 5% share of the money, of the overall monies. I think it would, I don't know. I don't say anything necessarily wrong with it. But I was outvoted. I don't know. I don't remember this vote because I absolutely would have agreed. Yeah, but it was Lily. Oh, shit.

Okay. Yeah. Thanks for Lily having me not be a sex slave. I mean, brother, you're getting paid. It's not like, you're not a slave. I love that. I get 4% of my, my, of 4% of the, 4% of the earnings from my raping. Yeah, absolutely.

Five. Sorry, five. You're trying, look at how you had the, you. You had to make it seem like it was worse than it is. Yeah, sorry. Sorry. Still not a fan. It was five.

Not a fan. I mean, whatever. So every idea that I've had has been shut down unfairly, I think. I had the brothel idea. I had the brothel idea. They didn't want to do it. I had the idea. I had the idea to start selling milkshakes where it was just, it was Kingston's sweat and milk.

And Kingston felt uncomfortable doing that. I was like, you're working out anyway. Just let me collect the sweat and put it in milkshakes. He was like, no, that's invasive. It's intrusive. I'm not comfortable with this. Like a pussy, of course. So like, I don't know, man.

I'm at my wits end with it, really. Like, it seems like it really can only be a podcast. I have an idea. Chris should allow me to hide explosives throughout his house. Okay, well, that's not really like something that can be sold. That's content. It's only content, but whatever. But he lets me hide explosives throughout his house.

and then he has to go through every room of his house and find the explosives. Okay. That's like more of an episode thing. No, no, no, no, no. You can keep going. We'll resurrect you. No, but we're looking at like trying to expand it into more than just to show.

That's a series. You go do it in different parts of the city. You go do it in different buildings. I see. It's Chris finds explosives. And that's it. I don't know. I really thought the brothel thing was good, but.

Let's take a vote. We're so close to Vegas where you can do it. Let's take a vote, guys. Vote if you want to see Chris Fines Explosives or the Sween brothel. I don't think you're going to like the outcome of it. I don't think I'm going to like it either. What if it's 99% Chris Fines explosives? Okay, I mean, fine.

I would be shocked. I'd be really shocked. I'm like, I knew it. I knew it. My people would never let me down. They're going to let you down. Oh, this, this viewer base, of course. They're trash.

Trash. But anyway, no, I have more faith in the sun not coming up than these niggas, man. But no,

the serious answer is like, we've thought we've, like, I have thought a lot about, like, how we start doing the live show stuff again. Um, because I do want to do that at some point.

And I think like I've been, I've made some connections that I think could help us. I haven't run it by them exactly. exactly and I'm having like I'm supposed to have like a meeting with somebody like I think actually like in a week and a half. Supposed to be like last week but then something happened and then now is Thanksgiving so it's kind of crazy. But like just people who know this stuff a little bit more and like have a relationship with like venues and shit like that to maybe get stuff set up for the future. That wouldn't be for a while because it would take some time to set up and like figure out everything and like whether or not it would be worth doing like how big the place should be. I would imagine we'd have no problem feeling like a like a, like.

a kind of like a smaller kind of like, uh, more manageable kind of venue. But I do want to do that again. I, because I, I did have fun doing it. And I'm bummed because the only time that we got to do the show live,

I was sick as a fucking dog. Right, right. So like, it would be nice to like, um, do it again without that fucking handicap, um,

actually run around, get people on mic and stuff like that. Cause that's what I wanted to do initially. Like, we wanted to do like a little bit of an episode. And then I wanted to go around with like a mic into the audience. and like have people like suggest shit or like people ask questions live. That'd be cool.

But I was just like I was keeled over in fucking pain that entire show. And then I had to do the other show afterwards. So it was like it was so, it was so bad. But that's something that we do, we do want to do. That was a good time. We've talked to, we talked to. We do want to do the, we do want to do the voice thing, the voicemail with the Google voice. We do want to do the, the movie commentary.

stuff. We should make it a network. You can have a snark tank network. Yeah, I mean, it's, we just have to, like, what I wanted, what I really want to do primarily is higher. It's a lot. I want to get, like, a dedicated editor or, like, a, not an, not a dedicated editor necessarily, but, like, a dedicated, like, manage person, management person to kind of, I mean, they could edit also. But, like, just to get things out in a way that's like, this is the exact schedule.

like, oh, like 9 a.m. this day is when this goes out or like, you know, or 9 a.m. every whatever. So it's on a consistent schedule. That way it's like kind of like off our hands and we can focus on the other shit. But, uh, I don't know. I think we're going to start focusing on that more primarily like after the holidays because the holidays are fucking impossible. Everybody's traveling. We're already doing like remote episodes more often than we planned on doing it just because again, people are traveling. Yeah. Also, the weather's starting to get shitty. Um, so I would say like, early next year we're going to start like we want to do the um in january we want to start doing the what is it the google voice um kick the year off with some voicemails i think would be a good way to start then slowly build up but definitely i think it's safe to say that it's very possible that there

will be at the very least a small live show in the la california kind of area i think that's doable. Yeah. I don't want to, I don't want to promise like traveling or like like like like a whole like oh we got to go to like, you know, Milwaukee or something like I or whatever they say. Qatar or whatever they say.

Qatar. Yeah. Let's go to Qatar. Star Tank Live in Qatar and Riyadh. Oh yeah. Don't give us some money. Would you go to Riyadh? Would you go to Riyadh?

Like if they offer us right now, what you go? Um, can I be honest with you? Can I be honest with you at this point? Fuck it. Like it's clearly, clearly,

clearly. we are in a post principles world so like at a certain point like if you're the only one playing by the rules you're just a fucking idiot and so like I don't know maybe I didn't I didn't like the Twin Towers anyway

so like I don't know I'm not exactly the best person I'm not exactly the best person I go there and be like thank you we've got such a we got such a nicer building there thanks a lot thanks you know thanks for your contribution.

I hate what you've done to airports, but I like what you've done to my skyline, kind of. So it doesn't really even out, actually. The airport's way worse. The airport, the consequences of the airport of 9-11 are so much worse than everything else, except for, I guess, like, Islamophobia. But, like, I mean, that's kind of like, I'm not, I don't know, I don't really care. The, like, going to the airport and having to take my shoes off, dude.

Oh, my God. disgusting. I hate it. I hate it. It's disgusting. I have to take my fucking Nintendo out. I have to take my fucking steam deck out, even though they know what a steam deck is. No, it's a long bomb.

What's interesting, they make me put my pets in small bags whenever I go traveling now because of the goings on of 11. I mean, 9-11. What do you mean? What's that with your pets? I bring my dogs as carry-ons. They don't let me do that no more. Oh. Could you used to do?

I don't even know. You can not bring it animals like carrying on. You can. I think you can actually. Well, you can only do the support ones now, no? Isn't it just like, you can do support animals?

I don't know about bringing them outside of that. But people are getting fucking slick. So they're trying to have like fucking support iguanas and shit. And they're like, get the fuck out of here with that. Yeah. This is my support tilapia. Yeah.

I want to bring my support. leopard seal. What the fuck is a tilapia actually? I mean, well, swordfish, I think.

A kind of point of nose fish. I've never seen. Yeah, I don't know what it looks like either. I've only ever seen, I've only ever eaten them. I've never actually seen. They're not bad.

They're pretty good. I like tilapia. I recently got more into Pacific cod. I like the consistency. I've never had cod in my life actually. It's gross to me. All that sounds gross. I like this consistency because it's more of a like,

it reminds me of the fancier, like, like, flat like the like um like halibate and sword fish even though those are way more expensive because i guess the rarity but the consistency is uh it's pretty good i like that type of fish it is so funny how much of the fish we eat like there really is like so much of it is just for food oh yeah like compared to like other things like we wouldn't eat like a boiled full cow you know what i mean like but like a fish is like damn near the whole thing it's most of it a boiled full full

cow is crazy crazy work. Having the room for that. The whole entire cow is insane. Boil this cow right now. Or you're not in the club. Some pepper, a few onions in the water and you boil the cow. Actually, new initiation ritual

for anybody listening. You cannot be a fan of this show. Even if you do, even if you do a, even if you donate on Patreon. We appreciate that. But you're not really a snart tank fan until you've boiled an entire cow. That's like Yeah, that's the pre-referable one of the young ones when they're really cute.

No, the big one. And you need to figure out how to how to boil the biggest cow, the biggest cow in your area, basically. You got to get a cauldron, although even a cauldron's pretty small for a fucking full cow. So you're going to have to figure it up, maybe like an indoor pool. Maybe like a big cauldron. Oh, yeah. The answer was right in front of me.

Big cauldron. Big cauldron. Large cauldron. I love it. Let's do it. So the answer is yes, we're going to do more. What do we got? Hour 47.

Let's do one more and then let's wrap this baby up. Let me see if I can find a good one. I got to cook today. I'm so excited. Fuck that. You're cooking today? Oh, you're doing Thanksgiving with your family? I'm preparing everything tonight.

So I got to marinate my chicken. I got to prepare all my spices and herbs and shit. Chris is a All right, let's what is this Okay, uh, I mean this is kind of Oh, you know what, whatever Chris is adeptus mechanic as simp I don't know what any of that means wrote in he says, hi guys, you all have obviously seen the steam console

But I think it's severely underpowered I've been using a desktop rig to play games in my living room for years And kind of disappointed the official thing is not as interesting Well, I mean I don't know It's a mid-range machine chain that's meant to be convenient above all else. It's like, what is it, eight times or ten times more powerful than the steam deck.

I think it's pretty decent if I remember. Eight, right? Yeah. That sounds like, that sounds right. I don't know. I think it's, I think it's appropriate for the size, dude. That thing is like, because it's like half a series X. It's like like this or something.

It's pretty, that's not bad for the power that you're getting. I don't know. I think it's interesting. I'm probably in on it. It really depends on the price point, but I would actually pay more than like standard console price for it. If it's below, I'm in the market specifically for having a living room PC

without the hassle of like setting up a PC in my living room. That really is the worst part. Same. It'd be so, but I'm probably not going to get it though. Yeah. If it's, it would have to be no more than eight,

I think. I would pay like seven. I would pay exactly eight. maybe, you know? But like above that is kind of you're getting into, I might as well just get another PC for the for the living at that point, which I won't do because it's the whole point is to avoid that. But,

but it will be expensive. It's not going to be like, if people are talking about it's like, oh, it'll be like $600. No, bro. Like $600 would be a fucking miracle for that thing. It's going to be 37 cents. Oh, okay. Finally deflation.

Everything's deflating. That would be worse technically, right? Like if it's like a catastrophic for some reason that I can't really understand No one's worth. All the things that are worth where disappears. All of the all of the solid wealth of the country disappears. I think we should just do a version of. And not to mention it'd be the companies that have the most money can buy up everything for crazy low prices.

So we would just lose all our property. We're going to do we're going to do Fight Club. You know, if you've seen Fight Club, the ending of Fight Club. Yeah. When they start raining nukes down. Yeah. Yeah. We're going to do that.

Okay. Yeah. What if we just said time out? Hold. Time out reset. Yeah. I feel like that's kind of necessary, honestly. I don't know how.

It'd be nice, wouldn't it? Of the banking system in the country? Yeah, we need a huge of wealth and don't need a huge reset. Is it crazy that Jeffrey Epstein like was behind the fucking financial crisis in 2008 in that wild? He was heavily involved in it. Yeah. It was crazy. That is crazy.

It's insane. I learned that recently. I learned that recently. recently. I mean, I think I might have, I mean, in the grand scheme of like a million crimes, you know what I mean? Like, it's just kind of one of those things that like, I think I might have like heard that in passing, but I never like, amen.

I, I, I'm of the assumption. So was J.P. Morgan Chase. Dude, sure. I'm just of the assumption that whenever I hear something online, I choose like, okay, that might be true, but like, I don't know because I haven't. Yeah. People could say fucking anything. And I've got to just, I try to steal myself.

against you're just believing random shit that I hear yeah they all do but yeah but sorry but no I heard that and I remember being like oh that that that would be that I I remember thinking oh that would be crazy of true and I remember I remember thinking like yeah I wouldn't be surprised but I wouldn't like you know I wouldn't repeat that fact on like a on like a live TV show or something right but I I was but then like I heard it again and I was like let me look into this and I was like oh shit that is it's like literally actually true that's crazy dude jay What a figure, man. He's been making moves for a very long time.

Good old J.F. man. Hello, hello. I'm Malcolm Gladwell, host of Smart Talks with IBM. I recently spoke with IBM's new director of research, Jake Embatta. We discussed his vision for the future of quantum computing. At IBM research, what we always do is answer what is the future of computing, whether it's coming up with new algorithms, coming up with better AI, coming up with quantum or coming up with just how do different accelerators go together. It's our DNA to answer the question of what is the future.

Isn't it a perfect problem for IBM because you kind of need to have a legacy of building stuff? Yes. Building actual physical machines. Yeah, it's why I came to IBM. I wanted the experience, the culture of building hard things that others have not done before. Where do you imagine we are in the timeline of this technology? There will come a point when it will mature. Right?

Yeah. My cell phone is a mature technology at this point. How far are we from that point with Quantum? By 2029, we'll build the first fault-tolerant quantum computer. That is one that can run a very, very large, large problem. To learn how IBM is building the future of computing, visit IBM.com slash quantum. Hey, it's Ryan Seacrest for Albertsons and Safeway. It's stock up savings time now through March 31st.

Spring in for store-wide deals and earn four times the points. Look for in-store tags to earn on eligible items from Celsius, Body Armor, ORAIDA, Silk, Capri-Sung, Bavarian Meets, and Charmin. Then clip the offer in the app for automatic event-long savings. Stack up those rewards to save even more. Enjoy savings on top of savings when you shop in-store or online for easy drive-up and go pick up or delivery. Restrictions apply.

See website for full terms and conditions. You can't like J.F. Garrape. I mean, it is weird that they have. Yeah. His wife's still missing. She's still missing and people are, uh, everyone's perplexed. Like, what the hell's going on with the law enforcement in Canada? It's crazy because apparently they haven't even swept his house.

They've never like checked to see like if they can find any DNA or anything wrong. They just never did that. I was like I guess they just literally don't give a shit why would they I mean I guess so yeah right I mean to be fair I guess they're like I don't fucking know this I don't know or whatever

All right here's a good we're gonna end on this one Because I did see this one I think I had a good answer to it I want to read it plo TCA wrote and he's like how's it going Chris Derek and pigeonston Did I say that? Probably at some point I remember we called them peasantston I remember that peasantston was one I thinkston was one from like a that wasn't from here but it was like a

we were sluts in everyone I don't remember slutson I don't know if that was everyone Horstyn Forston Vagrantston I like that There's a lot of things that work with your name actually Yeah shut up

Okay comston Comston That's hot I like that one Yeah it's crazy Anyway Anyway he says we see a lot of remakes of beloved We see a lot of remakes of beloved games

But I'm curious if you could have a really shitty video game be remade And I mean really shitty video game remade What would it be and why? I have an idea I want a next generation Like Unreal Engine 5 Glover I want Glover

Oh yeah I want a gritty reboot of Grubber Of a not grubber Glover Glover Everybody's talking about that that's that's I think

I think it would hit I think a gritty reboot of Glover would go hard like he loses his son and he's like he's cradling his dead son he's cradling his dead son he's got to get revenge against

I don't know a sock I don't know anything about Glover honestly I really I have not played a millisecond of Glover I've seen footage of it maybe I think I've seen genuinely in my entire life

maybe 15 full seconds of cumulative Glover footage but I've heard nothing good about it the only thing I heard about it was that it was interesting that somebody made it. It was interesting that it was a real thing. Yeah. You know,

I'd love a woke Max Payne. Max Payne is not a shitty game. Okay. The original Max Payne? Yeah, people love it. Yeah, but what a woke pain be better? Woke pain. They should have a reboot of,

they should make it minimum pain, min pain. And it's like, it's a guy. and it's it's it's it's a guy so there's it's the other side of the story it's like chief and arbiter kind of thing you play as min pain and you go around the level it's like your first level is the first level of max pain but you're going around basically like uh healing everybody like like yeah like putting bandages on the people that max pain kills and uh you're basically clean up crew basically uh for max pain and that's like the whole that's the entire game

this entire experience there's no combat But there is bullet time in wrapping people up in bandages. It's like slow motion, the slow motion bandage time. There's like quick time events and stuff. I like it. I think Min pain would be great. It's not exactly in the spirit of the question,

but I like it. Can you guys help me find this game that was on the Xbox store briefly? It was a complete rip-off of God of War. Oh, I, yeah, Zeus of Zeus of Child I think Zeus of Child

I was trying to remember it Zeus of Child Yeah war gods Zeus of Child I love that Unreal 5 fucking PS6 exclusive Uh huh

Or I guess Xbox can get it Xbox yeah whatever Whatever that means You know Xbox exclusive Oh my God God This gameplay

looks immaculate. The way he walks around is astounded. He slides backwards. There's no backwards walking animation, so he just like slide. If you want something to really tickle you, go ahead and look up war gods Zeus of child anywhere. And you will be rewarded, I believe. Like you'll like what you see. It's so good.

It's such a, it is so blatant that it's crazy. I've never seen a more blatant ripoff, actually. Like, I've seen people like, like, I've seen games that like, like, Pal World, right? With Pokemon and you look at that and you're like, yeah, that's a rip off of Pokemon, but it's also like, it is transforming it. Like it is, like, it is, like, unashamed of its inspiration, but it is a transformation. You say the same thing about vampire survivors and like, and like Castlevania where it's just like, you're kind of lifting a lot here. Yeah. But like, it's, it is different.

That's straight up preys. Is Castlevania older than vampire? A vampire survivor. No, me, never mind, never mind. Vampire survivors, yeah. Yeah. From like two years ago, I think. I think.

War gods. Zeus, so child. It's such a cleared shitpost game. It's so funny. It is the Cratos model, though. Like, it's not even, it's not, like, inspired by Cratos. Yeah. It is Credo.

It's the only thing that looks decent in this, that it's like, hey, I completely recognize that's Cratos. That's a decent job. Dude, the animations are... Dude, going out of the arena, too, it's like... It just... It is so shit. I love it.

It's clearly all stolen assets, because, like, so that... So, in the footage, I'm watching, he's fighting a bunch... I'm pretty sure that's, like... I'm pretty sure that's either... I don't know what the fuck it is. In my video, it looks like he's fighting, like, nemesis or something? From, like, Resident Evil, or, like,

I don't even know, man. like it's yeah yeah i don't know exactly i would love to see like a full on like i would love to see war god zeusuf child given the uh the time and attention to this what if santa monica they've been because they've been hush hush for a minute they have you know they're like oh the only thing we've seen is the hiring for specific roles you know like you see when they're putting out the oh we're hiring for this must be versed in this and they're working on war gods zeus of child that would be all i would want yeah you know i wouldn't be be that mad to be honest. I'd be

like, of course they'd be like, fuck, you gotta wait even longer for a real proper game, but also this is funny, thank you. I wouldn't be mad, but I would be like, you know what? If that's what you want to do, have fun with that. I just, man, I want that, I want that fucking remaster though, for real, like of the original game. Like, I just, yeah,

it's too bad, too bad. It's never going to happen. Sorry. It'll never happen. It'll never happen. Sorry. Sorry. Sorry. Sorry. Anyway, we're going to read, we're going to read our $25, we're going to read our $25 and up patrons now. So, uh, let's go ahead and read our $25.00, remember, you can go to patreon.com slash the snark tag. You can go to Patreon.com slash the snark tag. Oh, what is this?

I don't know. So like what, so. That's speed. That's speed expression. So the last question is, uh, guess what I show speed named his dog? wrote and he says take a look y'all and he sent me an image he sent me a link to an image and the image

the image is uh the image is this take a look y'all that's a he just said take a look y'all that was the entire classic line from uh when stephen a smith tried to tweet out a photo and then it just says like i m g underscore you know oh yeah that is and then somebody put somebody comments big if true and then Stephen A. Responds with,

what are you talking about? It's so funny. I love it. I love watching that like the translation barrier fall apart between like generations like that. And it's like watching the, it's like watching the Tower of Babel happening in like real time. Yeah, yeah.

It's just like, oh, we can't communicate. Yay, yay. Yeah, communication is impossible. Anyway, we're going to read the names of our $25. Now remember you can go to Patreonatom. Com slash Snartank, early access, ad-free episodes, exclusive episodes, all that jazz. Yeah, all right.

Count me down. Three, two, one. What would it look like if Scooby said that? What would it sound like if Scooby said the N-word? What would it look like makes no sense? There's a spoof horror about a giant sperm called Wadzilla, it's a parody of Godzilla, bust inside my mouth, put the peen in my boca. Oh, live in Lovita Loca.

Oh, I see. I see what you were saying. Yeah, I didn't get it for like the, For the entire several weeks that we've been doing the show, I didn't get your thing. Wow. Keep one second. I'm used to bathroom right back. Yeah, go ahead.

You're not needed for this. I'm just, uh, he's, I think, is he peeing? Is he, I think he might be peeing.

He might be, he, so he didn't leave the, are you back? That would be crazy. If you, like, took your headphones off and was like, excuse,

I got to go to the bathroom, but took your headphones off and stood there. And shut. And just chat loudly. Is chat. That would be. loudly. Then I get up and is just brown on my pants.

That's like that white guy. That's like that white guy who like mocks the camera and he like farce and shits and he's like you guys are like a good. Remember the video we saw the guy pissing? Oh dude, that video is insane. So what is he talking about?

He's like, he's like, fuck you. Yeah, he's like, he's, he's a video of this. I don't know how to describe this. Okay. He thought he's going to leave. He brings up something and he's like, All right, I got to go. It's a video of some guy, like, making a video. He's, like, angry at the IRS.

He, like, gets on his phone. He's like, fuck you, I, and he's like, the camera's, like, really low. And then he stands and he, and he, like, you can see him flexing and he just, piss just falls down his pant, like, it's crazy. His shorts. I was like, why? What's happening? But it's real.

It's not like AI or another. It's very, very bizarre. That's an angry man. Anyway, anyway, that's what Kingston brought up before he left. He's literally, hey, remember this? Oh, I got to go. I got to go. Logurt yogurt's bucket of probiotic brogert

Just learned Nightwing fans are called dickheads Big Chrissy A comfy knight is trying to figure out How to get in contact with the other trans femme Snark Tank patrons Miss T. Lomone God's favorite femboy Malik Berry Stephen Bonnell

Oh welcome Destiny Thanks for supporting the show Sorry I missed that one Oh Stephen Bonnell Oh Stephen Bonnell Thanks so much man Yeah thanks a lot man Appreciate it

I knew you'd come around eventually. Anil footcake, co-beba. Patreon Ross is Uber mega gay homo, Willie Admiere. Gay boy farty, young Colin, mistaking white phosphorus for flour, the dark passenger, curse technique,

nut in my hand and clap. The genie did the thing to turn Sween's blood into bacon grease, but the levels of fat in his body somehow decreased by 87%. Young Colin is a salt factory, young Colin in a salt factory playing with nunchucks,

but their swords. Getting chewed out of $25, by two sexy big black Israelites and a light skin twink, Delta Gamma literally fed this toddler last week. Why is it still crying? Clam, you'll Esquire the third. One time I took a shit so big it made me come, not lying. Comfy Transnite,

uh, uh, comfy trans night, Molly or Malley underscore Malibu on Twitter. So M-A-L-I underscore M-A-L-I-B-O-O on Twitter. So there you go. You're trying to get in contact. There you go.

You got it. uh that'd be crazy if like we're responsible for like a wedding uh i'm going to kill the president with a mortar uh they need they needed a stealth soldier so i put my hand of the habachi hot plate at benihana and burnt my fucking fingerprints off i haven't played expedition 33 yet solely because the french accent hurts my ears i'm not even joking elder scrolls elves call redguards enois only the gayest will suck guys blow me a gay by gay pen benjamin emma emma vglund calling timpool the N-word, the Arbiter. Even Rick Ross

can make a great verse. Never kill yourself. It can get better. Gay little Vietelborgs. Old Chris cutting stakes from Sweeney's Marbled Girth. Berserkerli's Big Bangbuss-sized Venus. Reckless Rhino, the Sloker 2, why so derpy? Happy's Mickleson.

Vane the Cock Johnson. My Chris Hanson Tomicacci hard-boiled eggs. Bayonetting a French soldier with a bad dragon toy, old man spaghetti nuts. Amy's normal Osborne. I started this company. Do you know that I've had sex with guys?

Domination. I've built the cum thrower. I'm coming for you, Sween. Keep your eyes open. Derek, parentheses, not chauvin. His innocent hashtag free him. Round that Asian is giga dumb and gay and stupid and gay and dumb and gay and stupid. Guy that became fluent in Chinese, but only using fortune cookies.

It's an impressive, uh, impressive trick. Yeah. Guess what I Show Speed named his dog? I don't know. I show barks. I don't know. I don't. I don't care.

I'm curious about it. I wonder if it's funny. I show speed dog. This better be worth of Google. Yeah, Mark. What's this? Of course. It's just the end of it.

I was hoping it wasn't that because I was like, that's too easy, you know? Because that's too easy. And then it was. And I'm like, that's too easy, man. That dog's going to be so fucking confused around him. Soft day, though, right? Yeah, just making sure, because that would be like, whoa, I was expecting. Yeah, no, he's not HP Lovecraft or nothing.

Trans Dragoon, we need a healer to finish the party. Gay Harbor, the Gay Harbor butcher, queen of Fap Hazard, ooh, Arabic numerals, very scary, who spooky numbers. Bald, blue-eyed German man, asking if Sween was the inspiration for Golem and Dispash. FYI, Garmin Boja is the embodiment of pain and sorrow in the Twin Peace universe, visually represented by creamed corn, Victor Frankenstein's womb sickness. I want to be the spirit of vengeance in Sween's balls. Thugzilla versus Mecca Wigat 2. It's Young Colin. GtA4 swing set glitch, frogs together strong.

I need Ubisoft to stop cucking me and release a new splinter cell. A gay ass show is not enough. Why does pissing sound like frying chicken? Young Colin asks where Dr. Will, Young Colin asks where Dr. Wiley is in Mega Moll. mind. Extra ammo idea. Write a music biopic for a film for Imagine Dragons like how the group formed and made their songs.

I brought a shirt to use Sweeney's face as a comrag. Big meaty stinks. Donald dumps shard of the deal shooting Swin'in' in the head every time he's late. Gay actor Rosebud Delicious. Sonic the Hedgehog Feet Porn. Sorry I can't have a burrito. Gay, little gay cob be like Wagwan. Dem Dixarayri.

Hello, hello. I'm Malcolm Gladwell. host of Smart Talks with IBM. I recently spoke with IBM's new director of research, Jake Mbata. We discussed his vision for the future of quantum computing. At IBM research, what we always do is answer what is the future of computing, whether it's coming up with new algorithms, coming up with better AI, coming up with quantum, or coming up with just how do different accelerators go together.

It's our DNA to answer the question of what is the future. Isn't it a perfect problem for IBM because you kind of need to have a legacy of building stuff? Yes. Building actual physical machines. Yeah, it's why I came to IBM. I wanted the experience, the culture of building hard things that others have not done before. Where do you imagine we are in the timeline of this technology? There will come a point when it will mature.

Right? Yeah. My cell phone is a mature technology at this point. How far are we from that point with Quantum? By 2029, we'll build the first fault-tolerant quantum computer. That is one that can run a very, very large, large problem. To learn how IBM is building the future of computing, visit IBM.com slash quantum. Hey, it's Ryan Seacrest for Albertsons and Safeway.

Ready to save, it's time for cyber deals. Put a spring in your step with fresh savings that brighten the season. These exclusive week-long digital offers on your favorite products are only available when you shop online. Save on eligible items from Kettle, Chabani, Quaker, Skippy, Hidden Valley, International Delight, and Signature Select. Available now through March 24th on pickup or delivery orders only. Restrictions apply. See website for full terms and conditions. Heath, a reminded of a U-Gu-Jocard Gids. The Real Kingston-Jamison went missing in 2005.

Derek is a powerful inward. is there a balls cheney Marjorie Taylor Green going on to strip after her stint in Congress Sweeney manipulates gay beetles into sex Gay and I the butt sex guy EA sports is in the sand Sweeney's Garmin Boja through his gay little silly straw

Find yourself someone who looks at you The way Trump looks at Mom Dani Make a gay cover of Hasbin Hotel Invite Vivsy Pop on the show Vizzi is unreasonably busy dude Like it is Like it is Viv is like one of the

Probably like one of the most Always working people I've ever seen it's fucking ridiculous is un fucking believable I've seen her I don't know her that well to be fair but like based on like I see her

based on what I know and I'm basically close to her yeah at this point a lot of has been hotel stuff has been popping up in my feed lately I think because of the season's like kind of ending

or whatever there's a it's a musical and there's some good shit in there I didn't realize that they got fucking Patrick Stump from fucking Fallout boy to voice a character in that show and I'm like

Okay. Oh, interesting. I got to hear that. I got to hear whatever song he's got. Plotonic Cousin, young Colin getting lured into a van with Mega Man merch. Department of Hor. Michael Richards taking a sip from his estes flask before going on stage at the Laugh Factory. Went to the store at 2 a.m.

and some albino dude looked at me funny because of the scumbag hoodie. I told him it was a rapist. You're the weird one again, by the way, for doing this. Haley Williams cover of Passion Fruit is the best cover of all-time, look. I've not heard that. I think she does I'm kind of cool with. Yeah, I just, I assume it's, I assume it's good. I haven't got heard it actually.

I assume. If Haley Williams does it, I assume it's good. I haven't really heard anything that's. Yeah, cock cheese, crumbs, Kingston's Mr. Crabs' Tastes are truly baffling. I am Donald Jihadi Trump, Duke of Arabia. Hand of Allah is my witness. Goon Devil, the man without Tom, Sweden has eight years ago. And that's why he can see his dad.

Dude becomes a lady. Ah, uh, uh, uh. Oh, dude becomes a lady. Nice. It's a song for the modern era. I got a 40 TI rig for $1,200 swing. Night Owl. After Call of Duty, the CE remake definitely has AI in it.

Yeah, probably. Actually, I'm not so sure. I think they, maybe. Like, I could see it. I wouldn't be surprised by it, but I'm not expecting it. Smitchie the Gay. The Star Trek is powerfully racist. Guys, I, then state your name is literally how you swear on other people,

which is what Trump. was doing calcestus is the goat young colin skinning himself to be the red megaman young colin pushing the elderly into a volcano carl d bradley um six seven nice very huge uh young adult novel alec i really hate that by the uh young adult novel alec baldwin and the chambers secret bullet uh where in the money i'm fucking gay i'm fucking gay i got a lot of what it takes i'm sucking a shlaw to take it takes to suck a shlong to take it takes to suck a shlong krag the canadian uh emoticons smiling, I guess. It's your boy, Shawnee D. Dick Suckastan,

At Grock, is this true? Young Colin in an endless battle against Capcom for the rights of Mega Man. What are you drinking right there? Is that your piss? I knew. Is it steamed piss? It's nice, chill, the frothy piss. Cheers, nigga. Nice. Cheers my guy.

Cheers my guy. Everybody's drinking, every dude, everybody's drinking piss. I don't have piss. Chris has a cup of pulpy piss, actually. I don't. Where's your piss, Chris? I really got to clean my, I really got to clean my I really got to clean my desk

Those are like 17 bottles of Dry piss Is that what it is? There's two Arizones and three coffee cups There's no like a little bit of Arizona Because I bet it looks like piss, no? Yeah but it's in a can Oh yeah

Damn Pour it on your hand Pour it on your hand Show of camera What? It's the piss! Anyway What was I say?

You think knuckles dick Is also shaped like a knuckle Gay It be like Oh God, what is it? Gay is it? be like we all suck dick down here it's penny wise it's not penis wise he is gay the idea is like gay it's like it's gay penny wise no penny wise is the it the it i know but like the idea that you wouldn't say the i read it like gay it it was like what do you what is and i was like oh you would yeah you would want to say gay penny wise

to be actually we all suck dick down here come come on down Georgie we all suck dick down come on Georgie we all fuck each other

isn't he literally canonically a pedophile is that true or is that uh he's just he's just sucks so probably he probably would pedify actually he's just terrible

Pennywise a pedophile I feel like everyone that terrorizes children they parentheses derogatory gets some sort of sick

pleasure out of it you know because he eats people. Like he eats them. But it's like you know what I mean? He doesn't fuck them. He just eats them. Well, off camera, you know? Off script.

Wait. Dude, he's so fucked up. He's an alien that uses racism to make the world the worst place. Like, that is crazy. Thinking about that is insane. He literally incited a race riot.

And it went to sleep for 27 years. That guy's a jerk. There's that scene in the movie, right? where like the new movie and when I say new I mean you know the one that came out yeah a few years ago recently yeah more recently um

we're like uh it opens with like a hate crime yeah all right I forgot about that yeah they push like a gay guy in a river or something and he's like yay he runs out the gay guy homophobia

grabs him out the water eats a movie finally that that demon clown ain't afraid to tell it like it is. That space clown really knows what he's doing.

I love the idea of watching it. I love the idea of backflips. I love the idea of watching like it and being like, man, I just relate so hard to Pennywood. I mean, niggas watch Star Wars and be like, I think the emperor's cool. And it's like, well, the emperor is cool. He's just.

No, he's not. Cidius is not cool at all. It's cool. Do it. Do it. Vader's cool. Vader's cool. slick, man.

That is insane. Palpatine can get away. He can grab pussy and nobody would say nothing. Well, I dare, I dare someone to say something. I, in fact, dare someone to say something to Palpatine. I'm going to grab your balls. Come here. And then I think it's so funny that even, even Vader, like, they don't beat him.

They don't fight Palpatine because they're like, oh, we would just lose. Yeah, what's the point. Even if he did die, he would. somehow return anyway, so who fucking cares? People make fun of that. I think the way he returned to stupid, but literally in the original books, he does come back again. It's not the east or the west side. No, it's not.

It's not the north of the south side. No, it's not. It's the dark side. You are correct. It's me. What is that bidding my master? It's a disaster. Skywalker

Where after? Dude, I remember That bright battles, right? No, fucking that was Star Wars Gangsa Rab in like In like 2003 on like albino black sheep Jesus Christ And like

I remember Dude, it's crazy how vivid that is in my mind I remember seeing that for the first time And being like the internet Really is going to be crazy one day And uh I'm fitting to pack this nigga up Hmm

Bion Gay. Gay. I like cities. He's racist. He's powerful. He's white and elderly. He's perfect.

It's perfect. God, I got to watch that again. I love you, Kingston. Hey, no homo. Hey, me and Kingston,

Dad and the Lappapitin, you know, Dots Cidius. We've been going down to the strip club, you know, and eating some Kamagoole. I love going to the strip club with this,

Old man. It's my favorite activity. I think he's so cool. I like how he makes it nighttime when he gets upset. If I go to the strip club next to him, I'm so much more approachable. It's crazy. That's insane. I can't cap.

Sidious with his drip, his gown drip, it's kind of fire. You show up to a club. He walks in shawled. They go to a club. It walks in Tony Soprano. You got fucking Darth Sidious with his cloak. You got. And then your dad.

And his safari clothes still. That is clearly a bad time. Like everyone should get out of there. You would genuinely assume that like if you were a stripper and you saw that, you would, you would probably assume that like some night of the museum shit is happening. You know what I mean? You'd be like, like, who are these people who are these historical figures walking into this place right now? I need that as a shirt.

I need that. I need all four of them. Tony, I just, like, no one will get it. And a lot of people will be like, okay,

that's Tony Soprano, that's Darth Sidious. That's, that's, who else I say? Kingston's dad. They'd be like, wait,

who is that person right there? I don't understand that reference. You'd pick out of those who to be one, just one cartoon character. A giant black dude with a blunderbust, the size of a fucking city block. We need to make that shirt. We need to.

to make that shirt and we need to have them standing nice to each other almost in like a diamond formation so like one's facing left, one's facing right and the other one's facing forward and then underneath it it needs to say, um... Hello, hello, I'm Malcolm Gladwell, host of Smart Talks with IBM. I recently spoke with IBM's new director of research

Jake Mbata. We discussed his vision for the future of quantum computing. At IBM research, what we always do is answer what is the future of computing, whether it's coming up with new algorithms, coming up with better AI, coming up with quantum, or coming up with just how do different accelerators go together.

It's our DNA to answer the question of what is the future. Isn't it a perfect problem for IBM because you kind of need to have a legacy of building stuff? Yes. Building actual physical machines. Yeah, it's why I came to IBM. I wanted the experience, the culture of building hard things that others have not done before.

Where do you imagine we are in the timeline of this technology? There will come a point when it will mature. Right? Yeah. My cell phone is a mature technology at this point. How far are we from that point with Conton? By 2029, we'll build the first fault-tolerant quantum computer. That is one that can run a very, very large, large problem.

To learn how IBM is building the future of computing, visit IBM.com slash quantum. Hey, it's Ryan Seacrest for Albertsons and Safeway. Ready to save, it's time for cyber deals. Put a spring in your step with fresh savings that brighten the season. These exclusive week-long digital offers on your favorite products are only available when you shop online. Save on eligible items from Kettle, Chabani, Quaker, Skippy, Hidden Valley, International Delight,

Frito Lay, and Signature Select. Available now through March 24th on pickup or delivery orders only. Restrictions apply. See website for full terms and conditions. I don't know, like, uh, oh my God, uh,

run the jewels. That's, I don't want, I don't want, I don't want a killer Mike to come after us. He's good, uh, we'll,

we'll, we'll, haven't been a fan of him in a while. There we go. We'll do jewels like a G, J, you know, G.

No, G. E. W. Uh-huh. U. U. L.

J. is it. Is that worth it? Is that even worth it? I think totally. It'll totally. Yeah. Because I just want,

I feel like he's the type of person that would try to get a piece of the pie. He'd be like, Hey, that's our shit. But if we made that shirt, by the way, you're not, like,

if we made that shirt and you buy it, you're not allowed to explain it. That's the, that's the, that's the key point of the shirt is like, I'm not going to explain this. Somebody asked you, like,

what does that mean? It's like, I'm not going to explain. Don't, don't worry about it. I can't say nothing. It'll overpower people with curiosity. And on the back, we'll have, like, kind of snark tank written in, like, small font.

People will be like, what the fuck is that? What is that? I like it. That's not a bad idea, honestly. I kind of like it. Absolutely am 100% serious about this. Yeah. Let's use AI since we have no morals anymore.

Anyway, uh, yeah, what was it? What was I? Oh, yeah, gay. It'd be like, we all suck dick down here. We went to the dumb stupid. gay idiot convention and everyone there knew you Dr. Drip M.H. Lord of all drip. In 1994 I met

Yasser Arafat at a hotel in Morocco. He ended the night by putting his balls up my nose. Cool guy. At all ice agents fumbled the Latina in their past. Obi won't you blow me. It's fucking true. I know. I know it. I know.

I'm fucking truly. Fumble the Latina, you know what I mean? That pussy pops differently. You know what I'm saying? am. I don't agree. I'm racist. What is Palpatine? What is Palpatine into? I like selling baby carrots up by you. Power, dude. That's why I never like raise his grandchild.

It's like Ray. Wow. Sidious. He's too evil. I've never tried that before, but you've opened up my eyes to a brand new perspective. Like genuinely, I think he's probably like one of the most evil people in fiction. Like he's just like on redoubt. He's like, no, no. It's not even, he's not even, he's not even, he's not even, he's not even evil.

He's like, he's not even top 10. He's not even top 10. I think he is. I think maybe not in like cartoonishly, like he isn't like a rapist. I think even if you, even if you took rapist off the, off the table. He's really, he's really. Chris, he's really evil. I don't think so. I think he's really evil. I think you don't understand the lore of how fucked up he is.

I've read all the books. I don't think. I don't think Darth Cidius. I don't think Darth Cidius is the most evil. He's one of them, but he's fucking evil, dude. He's not in the top of it. He might be number 11. I'll give him number 11.

He's not top of him. Oscar Kukashka. Kukashka is more of a piece of shit. But Sidious is more evil. No, Oscar Kukashka is way. evil, dude. Those Eastern Europeans are fucking menaces, man.

You married one, you do you, you driggin' Sludge drinker? He knows. He knows he's seen them commune with a fucking Wharf. I know I bound my soul to one forever. I'm aware.

But yeah, no, I think Oskia Kukashka hasn't beat. I think it's not even close. I think that that worm, that stop motion worm in Beetlejuice hasn't beat. The worm is, that's so crazy

because the worm is really not evil. all. Or is this be? No, you're saying that because you don't know, you don't know the lore. You don't know the literature. You haven't read the word. You haven't read the Beetlejuice expanded universe where they go to the internal politics of the worms and their own like hierarchy in society. You don't know you

understand. You don't know the battle of fucking wormed worm. A melevelon Creek. I think the giant worm from Gears 2 is actually more evil than that fucking worm. I think, yeah, probably. I think that word has intent a little bit. I think earnest

the first wretch that you see in Gears of War that's like kind of like he's like above the above the great i think he's more evil than palpatine yeah that's i think um i think who else is more evil like a lot of a lot of things are more evil at palpatine you know but he's number 11 for sure he's number 11 all right top 10 uh we got to do top 10 or top 20 most evil people we got to do that Oscar Krakash is definitely in top five. He's no less than top five. I refuse. I can't budge on that.

He's most evil. He's really high up there. You don't know the Lord. He's arguably only only kind of worse than Hitler, only a little bit. I agree. I hard agree with that. Yeah. No.

At least Hitler could read, you know. He could. He's an artist and he's literate. That's true, true. He didn't read and write. He was on meth also, but like whatever. him. Kremlin de Gremlin.

Good bring him, man. Did I read this? All right. Obi-Won, Cremel de Gremlin. Adventure Time peaked is peak cartoon network, especially past season four. Chris is in the top five

Oakenos of all time, cock-shaped box by Kurt Holpane. Chris Hewer, would be like, the skinny retard, just said he hates the gays on camera. Not upload it to YouTube. Also, I love penis.

Wage Slay 583, six gay rats in a trench coat running for president. Pippini Brothers Publishing Publishing Presents Frank Reynolds's new children's book, the horror acts. Donk.

Donkersen. Homeless Chris. Christopher Rapatsirk. Pee, I am gay. Can't You See by the Cox throbbing might come so proudly in males from the homo's fat creaming? What is that? Is that the, oh, is that the fucking Star-Spangled Banner? I am gay, can't you see by the Cox throbbing might come so proudly in males from the home.

almost fat creaming. That's good. That's pretty good. It's not bad. I like that. That's pretty good. I didn't get it until the end. I kind of should have got it a little bit earlier. Yeah, you should have. But, uh, but, uh, but are you. Shut up. You're not reading this. I know. Elipsis fan and I'm going to peg Jason Todd. Uh, um, you're slying out with Kingston. Isn't he?

Pretty cringe. Uh, John Strickland. Uh, well, you see, it all started in 1913 at this pencil factory. Uh, the church of Keith, the first church of Keith David presents Franken Epstein, the good die young. Young Colin forcing his hands into the vagina of a random woman on the street and ripping her in half. The scene of King Godora on top of the volcano with the cross in the shot. Pre-Raz, Blake 896. I got Lockjaw doing graveyard chicks at the Dick Sucking Factory. All I got was Lockjaw as previously mentioned.

Trump fucking a hole through a brick wall because he smelled a teenage girl on the other side. That fat kid in sunglasses shouting the Efsler at the fighting words PSA from the late 90s. I don't know anything about that. I actually haven't seen it. Das Goopi. Dave Rubin being infected by the flood and becoming the Dave mine. Young Colin going forward in time to remove the sponge like in the green mile. Young Colin playing Mega Man while chugging battery acid.

Custaceous cheapcase equals crabb Jew. Kingston, the joke is Mr. Crabs. The joke is Mr. Crabs. Didn't know the dime was there. Young Colin getting a scouter tattooed on his head. I forgot. All right. Yeah.

That is so goaded. That is next level. That's so, that's intense. dedication, I will say. That's so young calling. Especially if you keep the ear area kind of shaved so you can see. Yeah, yeah. All right.

What is it? What is it? Ben Shapiro grabbing his come and crusted Yamika from Jeff Goebblem's cock. Out of focus, Bigfoot. Rosa Parks at the back of the name list. Call me Donica Lewinsky, the way I, Slob, Big Bill, Big B, Bill. Sorry, Ms. Jackson.

Dino Nuggies in the stove, call that fossil fuel. New York, Nick. Ethereum needs help lowering his weapon in Halo 3. Prochillion Hunter, having a child, Naifram, and routing out our list. The king of...

The king of a wizard and the lizard wizard. King of haphazard. Thank you all for your time. For your patronage, remember, go over to patreon.com slash the snark tank if you want more. If you want to support the show, if you had fun, leave a like, leave a comment, all that crap. If you made it this far into the episode,

type in... Type in... Type in... What should they type in? Balls. Type in Piccolo's Cloaca Smells rank. That's what I want to see in the comment section

to make sure you've made it to the absolute end of the video. Happy Thanksgiving, Happy Black Friday, whatever it is you're doing. Friendsgiving, all that jazz. We'll see you next time. Bye. Don't celebrate anything ever. I agree with that, actually. Want to earn extra income for your business?

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