The Snark Tank - #429: Handsome Man Tells Great Joke

Episode Date: August 7, 2026

https://www.patreon.com/TheSnarkTank

Hello, everybody. Welcome to the Snark Tank podcast. It's me, Chris. It's him, Derek, and Tim Sweeney. Look at all of us. Yeah. What did the gamer say? Remember, you go to Patreon.com slash the Snark Tank.

You can go over there. Early access, ad-free, exclusive episodes. Dude, we found, I can't stop watching this guy's channel. He roared it out. We found a guy recently. And maybe he's been doing, I mean, he's probably been doing this. Wow. We found a guy recently

is this this fucking, I mean, I'm not saying this in a disparaging way. I'm just trying to be as objectively as objective about this as I can be. Just a really ugly guy telling these horrible jokes. He's like, what are the gamers? This really ugly guy.

He's being very objective about this. I really don't think it's even an opinion. I should say he's being very kind, actually, the way he said it. Yeah. What did the gamer say to the potato? Dude, these videos are killing me. He's screaming.

He's paring heart attack. So here's him just in his... Stop, Eric. Derek, stop. What did the gamer say to the potato chip? Hey, hey, potato. Hey, potato chip. Let's...

It's crunch time. Let's game. Derek, stop. That's not nice. Derek, that's not nice. What is the gaver? What did the gaiver? Derek, that's not nice.

Don't show him. Don't put him on here. And here's him with a little bit of makeup. Derek, that's not nice. Dude, unironically, I follow him.

I like, I like everything that I've seen. I'm saying this as a fan. You know what I mean? He's great. It's been taking over by my algorithm. I woke up thinking about one of those fucking video. Yeah,

speak of that. If you look real closely, it shows Chris Raygun is like this. You can see the little icon in the corner. Yeah. Stay away from her. Stay away from her. God, stop.

This is not nice. Those teeth are incredible because like, how does that happen? Stop it. We're promoting his content. Go follow that guy. He would appreciate that very much. I don't even know his name. Oh, yeah, yeah, I should actually probably.

He started being not nice. Pete's underscore playpin. I don't like that name. But, yeah, Pete's playpin. Pete's underscore playpin. That's a name. that's a rough name. I don't love to.

Rough name for that build. But that's, you know, we're here once again. We're queer. I think I already said Patreon on a copse. I should,

you are queer. You are very. I'm not queer. Not a lot going on. Not a lot to report. I'll fucking call me that. But yeah. Literally the biggest thing that's been going on is that people started

reading Fauci's diary because it got leaked somehow. You know, because every. Everybody's like being weird and there's probably some doughish people or some shit. But yeah, Rand Paul got a hold of it and he was like reading it in front of like Congress saying that Fauci does indeed snack on bag uh, beagles regularly. And they're just kind of, they've been grilling him about that. Yeah, he's been peeling beagles off the street and sticking him on shawarma spit roast.

Skewers. And it's, uh, it's a crazy sight to behold. just completely tackling fucking tackling them and just devouring them dude like an ambush predator dude just this horrid you guys catch any of the footage no I had because he was like they were like

so like uh so Rand Paul's like hey so um how about them beagles what's going on with that huh and then and Fauci he essentially was being kind of a coward and he was just pleading the fifth but like he's chewing the entire time

and you're hearing like whining like whining and like crying. That sounds like a dog. And I'm like, what do you? I'm preem. Fifth. And I was like,

I, this is weird. Yeah, he's chewing. He's, like he's, he's made medical advancements in scientific advancements. And he's,

he's managed to create dog gum. Where he can just chew on a dog and it stays alive the whole time. Because he says in his diary, in his diary, in his diary, he says, dogs taste worse after they die. Right.

And the, and the, and the only time. he can relive the highs when he eats alive dogs, but they only live for so long after you start eating them. So he developed this machine that turns dogs and do boneless gum. And that he can just chew. Bones gum.

So gum. It's a feet, man. It's a feet. You guys should really read the diary, though. It's a good read, man. Like, it starts off because he's been around since, like, the Reagan administration. And he said that, like, actually, he was just walking in front of Reagan. Reagan was just, like, torturing people or something.

and then Fauci kicked a beagle in the face and Reagan was like, I like that. You want to work for me? Do you want a job? I admire your gumption. I like the way you, I like the way you kick that beagle and we have a great place for a job. And he was like,

yes, of course. And then decades from now, I'm going to fuck the world with vaccines. I like that very much. I hope I'm alive for, for when that actually happens, but you said decades from now, so I'll probably be dead. Yeah. This is all a verbal

transcript. Yeah. None of this is improvised at all. 100%. I like, uh, you pick the dog in the face and Reagan was like, I like your style, bud. I like the cut of your jib. Do you kick black people in the face too? People love of course. I'm fucking Italian. Of course I kick him in the face.

Yeah. I love it. You do. Yeah. I, uh, but I haven't. Yeah, I don't know. I haven't, I haven't, I haven't looked in there's a lot going on i just don't care it's not it's not worth looking into at all unless you're extremely stupid the most i heard that came that came out about it was like oh turns out he's just like a he's a bit egotistical it's like okay like i think the average person that would get the amount of fame that he got would behave the same way yeah it like so i was kind like oh he's a regular person that started getting admiration because

if you're not retarded, him getting some clout for actually, because when you think about it, without the speed of everything working together at Operation Warp speed, I can't even imagine what the numbers would have been. Like the pandemic may have actually curved faster. Like it wouldn't have been as,

but it would have killed infinitely, way more. Like, right? It would have killed way more, but it may not have lasted as long. It's basically, darn it. Which I know, like,

the retarded, like conservative, I guess, wants that or something. At least they claim to want to do. I don't want freedom. Let's maximize dying. You want all your friends to die. You want everyone,

because you guys are going to die. You want to, you know, anyway, point being, he got, he got fucking his ego all inflated and he was like, oh, hell yeah, I'm the fouch. What's good, nigga?

And I was like, all right, relax. I'm the fouch. That's how he, like, he had a, he points out his chest that says, I'm the fouch. He had a sequined, he had a sequined lab coat with that name tag.

Hell, Yeah, dude. The Fouch. You know who the fuck I am, nigga? You know who I am? I'm the fucking Fouch, bitch. I will see. I'm doctor.

I'm Dr. The Fouch. He lives in a trash can. He lives in like a crazy, like crazy. Trouch can. I love that. He's just, he's just throwing vaccines.

Anthony. Anthony Fouch. Yeah. So he's Tony Fouch and he's just throwing, he's just throwing vaccines inside of people. He comes out of the trash can and he starts darting them at people. He's like bullseye. He does a fan of it.

He does a fan of it. He does a fan of it. He's so good. Kicks one and ding, ding, ding, and it's right in person's arm. I'm being cured. No. 10 out of 10. He just, he's perfect.

No, I'm being cured. No, my antibodies are building up and it's protecting me. No. It's happening to me. What have you done to me? But yeah, so I don't know. You guys can look that up. Outside of that, I don't know, I saw Spider-Man.

It's pretty good. But that's really, I don't know. It's, it's. I haven't seen any yet. I had to actually leave the theater because somebody like farted really bad. That's crazy. It was you. It was you.

It was fucking you. But you know the person that did that? You. It was you. What to be the person that? You bad. Okay. Before I did that,

that wasn't me. The person that did that wasn't me, you know that they told everybody else that someone else did it. Like the person that actually did it when he went, he's like, man, somebody farted in the theater. The fucking we had to leave. It was bullshit. That guy's like sweating and smells like burrito grease. Pants are brown.

The seat is brown. He farted so bad the seat that was black turned brown. He just like, oh, no, what I got off the ground a little bit, dude. That's crazy. Which is really crazy because you know he's, he's got some weight. He's dense. He's heavy, man. It's like me doing a cartwheel.

It ain't easy. It ain't easy. It ain't going to be an easy feet, but he figured it out. But yeah, man, it was good. It was the best Tom Holland one by a mile. So like, uh, props to them. They did it. It's breaking records all over the place, apparently.

There's a, like, more than endgame or something, something like that. Just, I think it's just under, which is insane. Yeah. It hasn't been out that long. Yeah. It's good stuff. But, uh, guys, which one of, which one of you sent this video?

Which one? Dude, one of you sent the video this, this morning or last night that had me fucking mesmerized. It was like, it was like, it's a video of a dude getting tased and a gas. Oh, that was me. That was, dude, that shit was crazy. Isn't that? That was genuinely like what's happening right now.

Isn't it literally safety protocol to not? It is never, never near it around gas. Never near an explosive, never near an explosive material. Never, never, never, never. It is so obvious to not do that. That is like so. And then on top of it, he does it. He tases the guy.

And there's another angle, too, that I found this morning. And I couldn't believe it. So he tases the guy. So the shit ignites. It's on the floor. The guy's screaming because he's getting burnt. And then when the guy escapes the fire, he's still trying to get him on the ground while the fire is still ignited.

It's still there. And it's just like you hear a lady that's recording like, bro, it's still on fire. Like move. Just the dumbest, sloppiest, fat fucking stereotypical. Like, it's, I wouldn't even, it's, it seems. fake. It seems it's that stupid. It's too good. Yeah.

Like the way that he falls off screen and then burst into flames is like dude what the fuck? It's so great seeing that video, man. I love it. I love how terrible police officers are. The guy that catches on fire, his perspective is released.

And he's saying and he, so the guy was like, I'm going to taser you and he was like, what for a fucking misdemeanor? What are you out of your fucking mind? And then he tases him. And that's when he ignites. He tased him because he got mad. It wasn't even like, he got mad that he like pushed back and said, like, what are you fucking out of? He said something like that. There's a video that he's got a hell of a lawsuit though, man. Oh, yeah. It's, it's, that's easy. He's going to

like, see he's going to pay him fucking. That's what that video that, that video the black guy. Oh yeah, yeah. Yeah. You set me on fire at a gas station. That's great. Because that's like reckless endangerment. That's like all sort of shit. That's all sorts of shit. Yeah, that's, it's genuinely like ridiculous that he did that to some of a fucking city block. Because some guy pissed

you off. There's this video that recently came out of this female cop of fortune. It's a female police officer too. I bet I know what this one is. But this female cop, this guy is like he's doing, he's like uploading his car and he's about to do work or something like that. And this female cop comes up to him and she's just yelling and screaming at him. And he's like,

oh, I'm sorry. Let me just like, what's going on and he's like yelling. She's like, she takes her gun out immediately. Starts freaking threatening the guy. The guy is like, I don't know what I did. Yeah, he's like, I don't know, I don't know what I did. Can you tell me what I did? And she's barking at him. And it's funny because it's like,

look, I understand Mrs. cop, I get your, I get your nervous, but you are meeting this person with a way to him, he's like, oh, a cop got attacked and obviously, you know how gang members are when they're gang when the homies get hurt. They get a little violent. But she's like,

so aggressive and the guy's just confused the whole time. He's like, what did I do? I'm sorry. Like, I don't know what's going on. So he has he has those, uh, the meta glasses on. Yeah, the meta glasses. And he's doing his job. He's electrician with, with the van outside and he's in a

fucking jumpsuit. So it's just like an obvious thing that he's doing his job. And there was a shooting and then this fucking retarded cop comes over and starts barking orders. And he's almost like doing Simon says because he's like, lay this way. No, lay this way. And like, so he's like, hopefully I'm going to survive

this kind of a thing. Her person comes over and trying to calm her down because she's Frangling, literally. She's like something's going on. I can't believe this is the police. I mean, you can believe it though, right? Like, of course this is a police officer. This

woman was probably in Afghanistan. Probably seen some shit. Yes. He's very likely. Welcome home. Go police and antagonize your community. And that's kind of the story. Go be a threat to the people who are supposed to protect.

Yeah, yeah. You know, you should just do years of therapy? No. I don't know, man. Go drive a cop car with guns. I think about this all the time. The people, like, the fact that, like, police officer, like, you, I think you should literally be born and bred to be a police officer.

Like, I don't think anyone should become a cop. I think you have to be, like, the best kind of person. Like a Spartan program? Yes, literally. with a ton of empathy and all that. Like, I understand it's like, it's ridiculous. It sounds ridiculous. Doesn't that sound like scarier?

No. Like, so, okay, so what kind of program do you, do you, are you talking about in this like fake utopian society? In a perfect society, obviously, you would have to be someone that runs around with that much power and jurisdiction needs to be a good person, you know. It's like if Spider-Man was just, if Spider-Man was just a guy from. Queens, he'd be a villain. But luckily, he is the exemplary person, you know. If Captain America was just some nigger from Brooklyn, there would be,

the battlefield after a fight with him would be a lot more messy. But luckily, he's not. He's an exemplary person. And I think people that have that, like, those titles should be like the cream of the crop kind of individuals. Yeah. Even more so the people that are in active war, I think honestly. I think the capability

of people in the ward is to be higher, but like people that are in the community need to be the best kind of people because they need to be to defend the community, need to be like a relationship with the community, you know? And they just aren't. And it's like, well, we get, we get the bully from fucking the city, the town school

that has a gun now and gets to just enact whatever the fuck he wants. Guys, have you seen this thing lately that's been I guess it's not like a specific incident, but like it's been happening a lot of concerts where like people are just like shitting themselves

at concerts. Is that like a new tech? Is it like a thing that happens a lot? Just because they're like just for the fun of it? I don't understand. Just to avoid like they get their spot and then they just wear diapers. Oh yeah. Yeah. I saw

and so to me that's classic. I don't know how classic it is. I know waiting in lines to get into the shows. People would do stuff crazy shit like that. But like actually like oh, I'm in the front and I don't want to lose my spot. I'm going to have a fucking diaper. I'm like, the show's not that long.

Derek, the fact that you said, I don't know how classic that is. It's really, it's, well, because I mean like, the show itself is not that long. You can usually be at a concert. And it's only a few hours long maximum. But they don't want to lose their spot, Derek. But you don't need to lose your spot because you don't need to be there that long to have to shit yourself. That's the thing that's weird. But what if they want to hold their spot and they have the shit at the same time?

I'm sorry. You're not going to wear an adult diaper and shit yourself. Why not? Who are they hurting by wearing an adult diaper? Who were they hurting? Who came out recently was talking about with, oh, it was Olivia Rodriguez. I think she was having a, I think it was her. She was talking to, I don't know if she was talking to Fantano or I can't remember,

but she brought that up at one point. Really? She's like, yeah, like, I don't want to like smell your fucking diapers or, smelly like like i'm trying to understand why uh because like i said when you're waiting outside for a show which you know a lot of people will wait for days i've seen this before i know someone who did that for during gray this japanese band that came over and they camped out and i was like you're gay and uh they did that though and those people are freaks enough to like word divers because they're there for days because that's kind of the idea like well you can't you can't hold it for

What name me a show that like had that lasted longer. I just, it just makes no sense to me. I don't know, dude. Can I be very honest? It kind of just seems like you want to shit yourself. Can I be forthcoming right now?

Can I be very honest? What? Olivia Rojigo has a song that I really, really, really, really, really like. I got to be real. She has one song that I really, really enjoy. I don't know enough about her to like have like negative. That song is genuinely a good song. I don't have.

Nate, I'm indifferent to her. I'm like, damn, dude. I'm indifferent to her still. I was like, I literally kept playing it. I was like, dude, stop playing this fucking stupid ass song. And then eventually I was like, this is not a stupid ass song. This is a good song. I'm a stupid ass.

I know her driver's license one and then the good for you. That's all I know. And neither of those songs are awful. You know what I'm saying? So I don't really have anything. Like you saying that doesn't like, we're like, I have to be honest. I'm like, maybe she has some fucking bangers. I'm just unaware of them.

The shit hit me. I was like, man, this song finally got me. I'm going to listen to the song. It's on my playlist now. You know, I was blown away. Solaj, Beyonce's younger sister has like one classic album. And I was like, what? No, she doesn't.

What the hell does classic mean to you? It's genuinely fantastic. Oh, you mean so like you really like it. Like maybe out of the 10 songs genuinely eight slappers. You're saying like it's like underrated because it ain't classic. That's not what I think it might be. I think it might be a classic. I don't think you know what classic means, brother.

At least in the, it might be classic in its specific genre. You know, it's kind of like a cult. Like, you know, there's like there's like a cult classic. So it's a cult class. So you can maybe attribute to that. But like say classic usually is kind of like a unanimous thing where people are like, oh yeah, I fuck with Solange, man.

That album where most people would be like, what the fuck? Solanche has good music? What are you talking about? It's so unfortunate that she's Beyonce's sister. I think genuinely if she wasn't Beyonce's sister, I think she got benefits. She probably got, like, people probably let her in the door more because she's Beyonce sister.

She has good songs because she's Beyonce's sister. She got the best producers and all that shit to work with her. She didn't write any of those fucking songs. I'm not a big I don't know, man. Fucking Beyonce don't write her own fucking songs. Go look at how many people.

writers, look how many people get song credits on our shit. Do you discredit artists for having to write their songs? Yes, 100%. Because that's the part of art. What the fucking you're talking about? Because sometimes performing, like, I agree. Look, look, I think what happens is when you are stating that you are a great artist, XYZ, and you're the best kind of this thing.

And you disregard the fact, like, I, because some people are more performers than they are writers. Right. And I think if you, because I think for music forms, that are like hip-hop in particular, not writing your raps is problematic. I think that's a problem. If you claim to write your raps,

if you claim to write your music, it's having collaborators is common in music. We're not talking about collaborators. Collaborators is different than you buying a song. If someone's helping you write your song, buying a song is probably different. That's what it is though. But if someone's making a song with you

and they're like in the studio with you help you create a song. Yeah, we're not talking about that. Isn't that what happens with most people, though? No, that's no. No, so there's collaborators, which I don't have any problem with. And then there is, there are session musicians. There are more than that than there are performing artists because that is a better, more stable job.

Most people obviously don't even want to be performing on stage. So they write music, these labels purchase all this music, and then they go, what do you think about this? What do you think about this? Oh, great. Now record this. Here's your voice over this song that already exists. that is, I would say nine times out of ten, that is what pop music is. And so even though I like that stuff, it's just I don't respect that artist as much as the people who write their own music.

And even if, and I don't want to say, I don't think of argument too. That doesn't even mean that I even like the, like say, Beck is a great example. Remember when Beck won like best album or whatever? Not one my favorite album, but I respect that he wrote the entire thing. I really do. I think that matters a lot. then, you know, like, oh, oh, so-and-so's album did way more numbers and they're way more popular. I'm like, yeah, but the people that wrote it, like, the way that Sia obviously was right and shit behind the scenes.

And then she was like, oh, I'm going to do it now. And I'm like, yeah, look at the talent. Look at the real talent. Here's somebody who's even that freak Bobby B-OB. B-O-B, great producer. I don't love him as a performer. I'll be honest. I think people can perform his stuff better than him.

him. That's like Leon Thomas literally, exactly. That guy wrote so many people's music. Like, it's his, his catalog for the music he's written. It's crazy. I was like, what? Do he wrote so much music for Drake? It's insane. It's like, I respect that. And it's like, so I respect. It's like, what are you doing? I just saying, I respect, I respect those people more than like, say a Drake. It's a bad, I don't want to like talk about, because I'm not talking about Drake as a character as just purely as an artist. But I respect those people because I'm like, oh, damn, that's why when that guy from Stranger Things, that really popular song, my first instinct was like, oh, who wrote his shit?

He wrote it himself. He's a musician, though. He is a musician. Well, I didn't. Yeah, exactly. Exactly. I just didn't know. I assume because it's so common.

It's such a common thing that I just made the assumption. I'm like, oh, one who wrote his shit. It's really insane. How many of them are musicians in that show? which is hilarious. Like I think that most of that cast, they're all make music themselves. But it's hilarious,

except for like Millie. I think Millie and Sadie are the only ones that don't make music out of the younger people, I'm pretty sure. Thank God. Andy is crazy. I mean,

I don't, I don't, thank Christ. We don't need more. Because it just reminds me of like Disney where like when they used to have like they used to just throw every single person with a show, it's like you got to have a music video.

We got some talented artists out of that, man. I don't know. Some. I'm telling you not all of them And even the sum that we got Like let's be real like maybe like what like one of them I think a few Who are the goats like

Selina Gomez? Justin Timberlake I think Selena Gomez is a dog shit musician But she has made a lot of very popular music I wouldn't even I wouldn't even know her music actually I don't know any of her I don't know any of her What's her most popular thing you can think of the top of your head?

I need you like a love song. Baby she made that song. You think it's called love song? No, love song she made on all that is it? It might be. Let's see what happens. I'm just going to type it her in their name.

Don't type in love song because that's going to do. No, no, because that's just going to pull up the cure. No, no. Love song. I'm going to talk to Syrily.

I really can only think of Justin Timerlick and Miley Cyrus, really. Selina Gump, the Jonas brothers. Who the hell of this? Unfortunately, they're very popular, Chris. Maybe not what I'm saying. That's not what I'm saying.

Have you guys heard of the scene? the scene? Because she has a song. It says Selena Gomez and the scene. Calm down. Like a love song. Oh, that's what you're talking about.

Oh, yeah. So that's the most popular thing. It ain't me. Good for you. Good for you. It's not like a. So Olivia and Rodriguez is the same song.

You imagine? Guys, have you seen? She has a lot. Like, I don't like her. I don't like her music, but she's very,

he's very popular. Not to distract. Yeah. You find some stupid? I just, I love this. I don't know if you guys have seen this. This has been going,

this has been all over my feed for the last like. 48 hours this this fucking do you remember that stop motion puppet M&M song or not that song yes right where he's drinking brisk uh classic

I said you uh I said you a thing I was in the chat there's I say you just the fucking it's been Derek it's dog shit all over my fucking feet I love it I saw that this morning and I was like why is this popular again It's so stupid

That sucks so bad But I saw that So like it's literally like a stop motion Like ad for brisk From the 2000s I forgot about those clamation brisk commercials I totally forgot about this entirely And so like seeing this was like

Whoa it like brought me back in a way that like few things can Because I'm so I don't know like If I watched Spider-Man 2 again It's like gonna take me back to 2004 That's gonna take me back to 2004. That's going to take me back to the last week. You watched it the eighth time.

Because I've seen it so many. I've seen it a million times. But this is like something that I genuinely haven't seen probably since it was just on TV. I've never looked it up. I've never even seen a clip of it. Doesn't you see this top of us? Eminem. And then having this terrible fucking edit.

It's like, damn, that is pretty ass. It's just fucking so trash. You know what that reminds me of? That reminds me of celebrity death match. I think it might be the same. It was definitely around the same time, like when those.

That show, dude, I love that show so much when I was younger. That was a really fun show. Then I watched it when I was older and like this show is so stupid. But it's still mad funny. I still have a great time watching it. It's definitely the jokes don't hit nearly as good. It sucks, but it's still very entertaining. I would say, yeah, for sure.

Oh, my God. That was the kind of shit I wanted to watch all the time. Oh, I love that. That's what my grandmother would be like, turn that off. And I'm like, please, grandma. Let's get it on. All the kids in school are watching it. If I don't watch it, I'll get raped.

Please let me watch this, grandma. What did you tell her? No. What did you tell her? Exactly what I just said. There's no, there's nothing. It's the truth. I said that exactly.

She was like, too bad. Too bad. Turns it off. Too bad. Good luck. Grandmother, please. If I don't watch this, they'll beat me viciously. I need to watch this.

Sorry. If I don't watch And I'm able to recite this exactly grandmother They'll beat me till I die If you love me, you allow me to watch this whole episode With no interruptions Oops I don't know if you guys are familiar with

This is the only other thing that I saw it happened And then we love songs I don't like that That sucked Are you guys familiar with Actually you guys probably wouldn't be There's this guy Max G Hot Diggity Demon

I know who that is yes Did you see the thing? Yeah, it was crazy. I was like, It's nuts. So this is an old school animator. He still animates from time to time as far as I'm aware. But like, dude, he, uh, so I guess he's got fibromyalgia or like all these other and like all these other health problems.

And he had like a stream where he was like, hey, uh, I'm going to do this, this and this. So like, uh, I'm going to seek doctor assisted suicide soon. Oh, shit. In Switzerland. And I was like, oh. that's kind of crazy and then like he went live with like oh hey update

and then like in the top corner says like don't freak out or whatever and it's just like a bunch of like I don't know how you expected people not to freak out of it then it's kind of a wild yeah it's kind of a wild thing just thought it was worth mentioning I don't know if I have much to say about it's just it's just kind of why I forgot that that was a thing

you know I saw and I was like whoa it was just intense I was like oh well yeah I mean hey you know it's I mean Look, man. I remember my house is crazy, honestly. It's really, really hard to live with. Yeah.

It's really hard to live with. And I, I respect his choice to do what he wants with his existence. That's what I'll stand that out. It's, it's your life for people to say like, oh, no, don't do this. Like, yeah, but this person's suffering. And you, you saying that they should stay alive and suffer is not fair to them if they want to choose to live the way they want to. I think it's legitimately. insane to push back

against that when people are like try no you have so much reason I'm like bro do you think do you think I'm literally suffering do you think this person is has not thought this shit out thoroughly and it's not just like well not well look suicide

people that are suicidal he said he was looking into other thing after people like freaked out of it I was like all I mean I think I'm not thinking clearly or something I would say that to settle down If like if look it if you I genuinely don't understand some fucking people and I think it and it may have to just be

tied to religious dogma Because if you if you weren't you would be like why am I alive? Sure you know like I agree otherwise like maybe some people think oh if you even a doctor assisted May constitute as suicide and you will Burn in hell for eternity or some shit oh I see yeah because I'm just kind of like I don't we don't want anything to suffer. That's why we, you know, put animals down. And it's like, why can't you put animals down?

I don't put animals down. Is it because you're a cruel person? No, because I think it's funny. You enjoy it. There's comments. That's crazy. He says he's not a cruel person, but it's funny. I refuse to put my dog down.

She's constantly screaming. But I get good laughs out of it. I think it's funny. I get constant laughs out of it. Why would I do that? Why would I ruin my laugh? My dog is 27. She's constantly streaming.

Her voice is horse. My dog is hoarse. That's how much pain she's in. I don't like I don't. I think people, I think the problem is that suicide is so often like attached to like really. Like I don't know. Like it's.

I mean, listen. I've been in, I've been in, I've been in traffic where I've been like, I would kill myself in this moment. You know, so like I get the triviality with which with which we all talk about it. But it is, uh, it's intense. Nonetheless, it is very intense. It's crazy to hear some talk about.

It's particularly with, you know, we've all been there with people that have been minorly inconvenienced or people who are having some mental health episodes to where I understand the pushback because you do know that there are tools to be able to over. overcome this stuff versus physical ailments where there are no cures for. Oh, say imagine you get ALS and you're like, oh, I'm fucked. There is nothing you can do about that. So some people might be like, well, let me check out before I get completely fucked. Like to me, I would be like, I completely understand.

Like, why am I going to beg? No, stay alive till you're completely fucked up. Like, well, what the hell? Why would I do that? I just leave the room. They're like, dude, I'm really feeling bad. I just get up and I walk out the room. They're like, they're like, yo, dude.

I don't know, man. Things have been really rough. I'm like, oh, word. And I get up. You're like, oh,

yeah. I'm like, oh, yeah. I'm like, I don't, I don't, I don't, it's like,

dude, I'm trying to chill right now, bro. Please don't fuck up my vibe. Yeah, you're stupid, the stupid little bullshit,

bro, like for real, like, you're fucking harishing my vibe up so. I love. I'm trying to watch back to the future, too.

And you're talking to me about how sad you are. Like, stop being a bitch, watch the movie. he's about to say Gramps and you're gonna mess

He's literally one with the power scene Dude the power scene's about to happen bro Like what are you doing Those boards don't work on water Unless you got power He's about to say that dude What are you doing? You fucked it up

Now we missed it Now I got to rewatch the whole movie Fuck everything Now I got to rewatch the whole movie At 0.5 speed again Thanks a lot You're so fucking selfish Watching movies slower is crazy.

I get, like, obviously watching a normal speed movie, obviously is the default. Speeding it up, that's crazy too, but like at least I can understand. It's less crazy. Watching an entire movie at 0.5 speed is fucking next level crazy. No, it's not. Okay. That's what we got to do, because you really want to soak in all the frames, man. Exactly.

If I'm really an artiste, if I'm a connoisseur of what I'm absorbing, I want to watch it at every, like, I watch it at point 16. Oh. Every frame. I watch every single frame. Just to make sure I'm like, I'm seeing everything. Eyes never close either. That's locked. And your eyes are not red.

You're not tearing. You're just kind of, all right, good watch. Good watch. It's like, how did you not blink for so long? Oh, I have to keep my eyes closed for three days now. Three days straight. Yeah. Yeah, your eyes been open for days.

Then your friend, hey, bro, I'm not feeling so good. Come on, bro. What are you doing, dude? Come on, dude. I'm going to have to start this whole fucking thing over. Oh, my God, bro. You mean, dude, just do it. The intro credits haven't even finished.

You try to watch Star Wars. It's been days. It's still the crawl. It's everything. Fuck, man. I missed it. I missed what it was saying. I missed the word Akbar.

You're fucking jerk. Oh, my God. possibly miss at point 16 you're gone for like four hours you're reading everything very astutely so you're like the force

awakens you're right bro I should just go into you know I nobody yeah do that get out I just get up I get up and I leave I don't fucking do yeah yeah you just get up don't even gauge the whole thing reminds you that Norm McDonald's like a normie

where he goes like people always say like I don't I don't know saying why he killed himself and I go you don't it's insane I think I I'm very much so someone that is like for people on like I don't think other people have much to say in the goings on other people's lives is like look I understand that you want someone to be around

and I get it it makes you feel better knowing someone's around but at the same time if someone is suffering to keep them alive is just evil it is yeah some people just Can't handle it. It's, it's, it's, it's, it's, but like, it's, because I don't know, I think of real big problem is that people just don't under, people are not taught correctly how to deal with death, period.

And it's really a huge problem that people would suffer from. It makes me sad. He sent something. Don't worry. Don't worry. It's not, it's not anything. Okay. We're going to read, we're going to read, uh, some of your questions now.

Patreon.com. Oh, no. Patreon. Oh, no. Oh, no. So, no. So, it's going. go. Remember you can read, you can, you can get your question read over at patron.com slash

Star Tank 2. He's not. If you, uh, if you want, uh, just seizing out, just Spider-Man just having a seizure. This is Spider-on-5 leaked footage. So much to do that. So much it's like, while Spider-Man's like going on one of the web, someone is like, does something to his brain to make him have a seizure, so he just falls and dies. Got him. here's a good here's a good question from a bowl of milk with no nails nice with no

milk without any milk right this way sir this guy's fucking tough he says what are y'all's opinion on what are your all's opinions on people intentionally using older tech to escape the internet and constant

connectivity i just got my hands on a gen 6 iPod classic and I plan on swapping to a flip phone in a few months. Am I a gay, stupid idiot douchebag? Thanks. Yes. I'm to be honest. I think you're performative, yes. It's completely fine.

I'm always, I always couple everything with as long as you're self-aware, I don't care. Right? It's like being a complete fucking nerd or you know, we've talked about people's kinks. If you're completely aware, if you like, if you munch it and you're completely aware that how

fucking weird it is and how grotesque a lot of people think it is instead of trying to push back and what are you talking about i don't care when you do your thing i'm gonna i don't want to see it ever don't talk to me about it but good great your flip phone i'm like there are there are ways to escape the quote unquote matrix without buying old tech if you want to collect old tech no problem but i just don't really like the excuse or like i want i'm like you just just get off the fucking internet dude you don't have to engage on it you are a human being and not an animal that has instincts that you just follow without thinking. You can just not do the things,

which I don't know, always makes me want to kind of like, it makes me so upset about, it's like you're almost like admitting that you don't have autonomy over yourself to where you can't have a smartphone and use it as an old school iPod. You don't have to use, download these apps and engage on the internet. You don't have to do that. You can just have a nice, fast piece of tech and use it as like an iPod back in the day. I don't know, man.

I think it's the idea. trying to be better than people in a way that's just like, no, you're actually making yourself seem stupider because you're preventing yourself from dealing with these things. Just don't use it at that moment, you know? It's more, yeah, I just want you to have some willpower. Have some autonomy, man. I actually, I think I might disagree. I think this, I think, I think it's not, so I'll, I'll say this.

I don't know if necessarily going to older phones makes a lot of sense. they do make modern dumb phones. And I think that that's actually not a bad idea because it is kind of like you get the functionality that you need without necessarily a lot of the distractions and shit. So it's like that would be a smarter way to go. I honestly would do it if my job didn't revolve around the shit. Because I hate, I fucking hate my phone.

I hate that I have to have it. I hate that I have to have notifications. And I have, I hate that I have to respond to emails. I hate it. It pisses me off to no end. But I just can't not do it. But like, but you're not. You're an outlier, you know, because like you, but like, right, I understand.

But someone else is like, just don't use it. I agree. I understand. That's the real sign of willpower. You're not using it. That is how you actually prove. Right. But like you, sure, but you train willpower.

You have to train. That's a muscle. I agree. The best way to flex that muscle is to just like, I think it's not a bad idea to deny yourself the access and deny yourself the temptation and deny yourself the ease of access to those temptations as a way to get used. of that before you can truly establish that like, okay, now I really don't need it.

And now, and then after that, it becomes trivial. I can, oh, I know I can respect that idea. Being like, I just, I removed it from myself because I'm trying not to be on it. You know, like, I do think most people who talk about this, though, like, it is, it is a little performative to me. And it is kind of like, well, what do you mean you're doing? Like, are you really going to do that?

Um, because most people don't. Uh, but I see the value in it. I fucking, you have a lot of, a lot of, you have to understand a lot of, you have to understand a lot of, lot of the tech and research that goes into these things are designed around making it as so

circumventally addictive as possible to the point where it's like it really does fuck with people. In a way that I think is actually way deeper than any I think it's crazy than even porn addiction and shit like that. You know what I mean? Like I think like I think and you know it too because like I go home sometimes or like I catch up with old older family members

and the same people who are telling me it's like you got to get off those video games. Dude, they're cool. They're scrolling and scrolling and scrolling. It's bad. And I'm like, brother, this is so much worse than what you thought I was doing. It's really bad. It's not good.

And there's a billion dollars. There's billions and billions of dollars poured into making sure that it's just like it's circumvents most people's will. I try to not use my phone with the first half an hour I wake up. Like that's the thing I looked into like not first hour, but you don't use your phone. The last half an hour you're awake. You don't use it. listen before you lie down and go to sleep and it doesn't it just helps but it's let me ask you something do you ever do you ever get anxiety or anxious when you don't know your phone is where it is

oh 100% not exactly no okay so it depends on where i'm at though like if i was in my house you know in my house i don't know like it's fine a guy whatever i know it's in my house that's fine right but that's what i'm talking about like i'm not talking about you're out in the public because that is just worrying no matter what like oh shit i lost my shit but like um i think that's what people should start with because um jose jose jose jose jose i'm made a comment to me the other day. She was like, oh, I like how trusting you are because, like, I just left my phone on the counter with Facebook or something was just open completely to where you could, like, rummage through it if you wanted to. I don't give a fuck.

I really like, I'm so, that's why, like, say when Twitter became a cesspool to me and I just literally, I, I jump on it, like, say, a couple times a month now because I just don't fucking like it. And I don't, I don't feel like I need to get on it. anymore because I just feel no value in it. So like I've, I have the benefit of, I just do a lot of introspection. The only thing that I need to work on more now is just my, myself internally about like my body and eating healthy and shit like that because it's the same thing where, okay, here's the next challenge. I literally can't remove myself from this stuff because it's everywhere I go.

So the idea is to just not engage with it, right? Just don't engage with it. Stop being lazy. Just consistently cook. I used to do it. It's do consistently cook. This job has made me lazy and I need to reverse that shit. I would pack my lunches.

I would meal prep. I would go out. I would go to work, whatever. I had a routine. So on and so forth. So anyway, you know, if you feel like you're at the point where you're so, you can't just not look at your phone. Okay, maybe you do need to force yourself to downgrade because you're hopelessly.

but I would like for people to try first and just see if like 30 days, can you, you know, just survive 30 days like I would snooze my thing on Instagram. It's for 30 days. They don't let you turn it off, but the suggested content. Because I just wanted to turn it off and I would have to snooze it every single fucking 30 days. But then I finally let it go because I wanted to curate those horrible fucking musicians. And that's been fun. But I'm kind of, I'm starting to get a little bored of it, to be honest.

It's a, it's a, it's a, it's a, it's a climb, you know? And it's like, I, like, I'm of both minds where, like, where Chris said is doesn't make, it does make sense. Because that's how you build up to not using that stuff, you know. Yeah. If you're like, well, I think, what I'm saying is like, I don't think anybody, generally speaking, I can't imagine anybody even thinking about doing this unless they've acknowledged that like, oh, this is kind of like, you know what I mean? Like, if you're, if you're, if you got people who are just like, oh, yeah, it doesn't bother me, then they're clearly not. bothered by it. You know what I mean? They're not in the space to even be bothered. So like I think most people generally who talk about this, I think are approaching it in good faith because it's not cool. Like I don't think it's cool to have a dumb phone. You know what I mean? It's not like, ooh, look at how interesting. You know, I look at it as like it really would be nice to just not have to fucking constantly. But I have to keep up with all this bullshit. Like I unfortunately have to pay attention to the fucking games industry. I have to be on top of all this shit. And Twitter is unfortunately the easiest way to do that. And Twitter's the worst shit ever.

I fucking hate it. Twitter has objective. The way, if you look into some of the studies of it about how that website has changed in the last like maybe three years, it's like, oh, wow, this website used to be respectable. And now it's just ass. I just think generally like, yeah, it's good to test yourself, I guess. But like, I also think it's just, it's one of those things where it's like,

if you're an alcoholic, um, you could surround yourself with alcohol and like, flex the muscle of just not giving in. But like the best way to start really is just to kind of remove yourself from this from the environment that's like that's making you prone to behaving in those ways in the first place. That builds up your kind of I think that's a better way to build up that muscle to be ready to flex as opposed to just kind of throwing yourself into the deep end. Yeah.

I would I would say. Yeah. I understand. I would say it's closer to like because the alcohol is still going to kind of be around you with advertisement and all this shit. But like you don't want to keep in your home right. And in the same way, I would kind of say with your, I would test this out first because a lot of people have been doing this when smartphones became prominent in the first place. So I would say like 2010 was a was the kind of when it really took off like for everybody had a fucking smartphone.

There's a lot of people like, I'm not downloading apps on my phone. It's these applications are only going to be available on my desktop because most people don't kind of sit around at our desktops like the way we do. But so they just can only scroll for a little bit on. shit, but they're not going to do on their phone where it's so easy to just get stuck to it. I would say try that first. If you fail, then go get a fucking flip phone. If you can't even handle that, then it's like, oh, I'm cooked.

I need to just completely... And again, there are dumb phones that are still smart that you can buy. Don't go like get a flip phone from like 2010 or whatever. You don't need that. They make phones specifically where it's like, here's text messages,

GPS and a browser if you need it or something and a camera. But you can't download apps that like spam you with notifications. They have these things. And I think it's a solid. It's probably pricey because I would imagine that the the clientele for that kind of product is very low. So they probably have to keep costs high. But that seems like a pretty specialty item. Perhaps.

I mean, they're cool. I've been tempted to do it, but I just, I can't feasibly do it. It just makes no sense. It just, I just want you all to think about this, though. The, those weren't, that idea is not marketed towards people like you. It was a marketed. I want you to just, right, consider this. It's for, it's, it's marketed towards children and old people.

I want you to keep that in mind. Like, that's, right. That's, uh, be like, oh, shit. Like, I need to depend on something that's normally advertises for children and old people. so it kind of you can recognize like where your head's at right now like oh shit's gotten pretty bad and um and look i understand i understand i just again if you announce it here's the biggest thing too if you tell people that you're doing this thing for like like you know like if it comes up in a conversation of course talk about it but don't i would inflect it because i feel like people

are going to be like you're a fucking weirdo it's just unfortunate i can't even i remember the first time i heard a Ari Shafir, he's like, oh, he's already still has a split phone. I was like, that fucking fuck Ari. That was my first thought. I was like, man, fuck this dude. And I'm right because he's a piece of shit. He turned out to be a terrible person. Well, to be fair, did he say he did or did somebody else just point out that he did?

No, he said he did. Ory's that type of, I just, you know, I should have known better. I first discovered him on MySpace where he was doing the amazing racist clips. You ever see that shit? Well, but he'd like, yeah, he would dress up as like a KKK member and like, oh, hey, can I get some

gas from the like, you know, like somebody's at the gas station. He's trying to get his, uh, he's trying to, because he has like, he basically wants to burn the cross, right? But it's implying. He doesn't say that he's going to do it, but he's like, he needs some gas to burn its cross. And then he's seeing how what he can, he's pushing boundaries. And it was like funny, but also I'm like, this is kind of fucked up.

You know? That was a, yeah, he's, he's an interesting guy. And, uh, he drugs his best friends and shit and pisses it. That shit would do that. He pitched in Joe Rogan's hallway in his podcast thing. not knowing that there was a camera there. I just think that's cool. I just think that's a little awesome.

This is cool. Oh, my God. Piston is always crazy. He's really going for it, too. I just can't imagine being a grown, like your friend that is giving you essentially the biggest platform in your entire career. You're like, you know, it's going to be funny. I'm going to ruin this guy's hall. Like I think that's funny, but that's also like, you shouldn't do that to somebody.

It's funny because I was already liking. I was disliking disrogan at Joe Rogan at that point. So it felt funny to me in the world like, ha, like Joe Rogan, you dumb bitch. Like, you just can't come over after that. Like, if you piss on mind, like, you just like that you can't come over. Like, oh, you can't. You're not out of my house. The fact that they remain friends with him after he drugged Bert Kreischer.

I just, I just, I don't understand that. Again. Fuck, like fuck Bert Kreischer also, you know If I, I think You shouldn't drug people Without their consent However, Bert Kreischer I don't know

I don't, I don't feel that bad That you feel that bad for Burke Bricer got drugged against his will You know, like I'm not that concerned for him He's a disgusting pig Um, I used to listen to Um, I forgot the podcast Two Bears One Cave

I was listening to a handful of episodes and then I was like oh this is the same thing over and over because I just really don't like Bert but he told enough stories he's alcoholic he's alcohol is fat he's fat he's he's dumb he's fat alcoholic he's his can is dirt stupid he's he showers here's two things that he said that really does I just disrespect I can't stand this guy he showers in his pool so he baves in his pool I should say so he just like grabs like a bar of soap and like just baves in his pool. And another one.

And I can't, this one makes no sense to me. He clips all of his finger and toenails on the coffee table, like in his living room, grab scotch tape to collect it all and then sticks it under the coffee table. And I was like, kill him. He's on the spectrum. He's on the spectrum. I can't even blame that on the spectrum. It is.

Putting it under the coffee table? That's clearly European hygiene. gene and being on a spectrum, you know? Like, that's both things together, you know. I can't blame the putting the thing under the spectrum. That's, that's a, that's a, that's a. It sounds more devious than, Derek, who's doing that though?

Like, I understand, like, I get what you're saying, but no one just does that. Right. I, no one just people who are, no one just pisses in someone's hallway. I think it's kind of devious behavior. Because you know, just collected it all. Just throw it in the trash can.

But I think the deviance comes from being. socially like disabled. Like I think there's both things. Listen, I actually, someone blurting out the N word and saying a slur like in front of people like at a situation where it's like not the right time to do it. Obviously that's them being a jerk to a degree, but that's also something's wrong.

Something's clearly not compatible in your brain to let you know that like also you just shouldn't do that, you know? Like two things can be true at once. I think it's a double. Possibly. It's just I usually don't contribute like something that I would consider more malice To be like that person's on the spectrum I think maybe they can be disturbed in a different way

But I just I just this is something that I would completely open the floor to like anyone Like let's discuss this because I'm actually like maybe maybe I'm thinking of The spectrum in a different way to where even something because I'm just thinking of it in a way that I know it's harmless What he did but also I don't contribute it in the same way somebody would pick their nose and wipe it under the coffee table

or something or sticking their gum under there because they're lazy or they're just not thinking of social skills he collected them already he's like oh smart idea because I was with you for a second though he's collecting them easily and then he

pap you know and I'm like wait it isn't insane it's an insane you've already gone through the effort yeah you've already gone through the effort to grab the tape and all that shit instead of just leaving it there

or sweeping it under the carpet or something like that which would have been more like like oh you just I would attribute that more to like maybe some type of spectrum issues then I don't know I hate him so much he sucks I hate him so I hate him a movie

They made a movie with Mark Hamill Mark Hamill I think plays as like dad or something in a it was called the machine because that was his only bit that he had growing up you made up some fake story about him like meeting the mafia or something in Russia and then they greenlit they optioned a fucking stupid ass movie on that and it made zero money because of course I don't even understand it was it in theaters it was like a Netflix thing

it was in theaters and uh so crazy I don't understand how it got optioned it must have been some tax write off thing that's all I can think of because I don't know I didn't even figure I didn't even see who actually who picked it up I was hey man he got his bag man good for him he did I mean I can't hate that I guess I mean it just shows you that anyone anyone could be anyone can be a critical comedian right yeah it doesn't take much at all yeah absolutely somehow I still can't do it though somehow still I'm too lazy I'm too lazy to I would be one of those lazy piece of shit doing crowd work and then having the same fucking material for like an entire year

you know and then like I feel like I'd be one of those people I just I just don't get like for me it's like I just don't I feel like I would just I just don't have the ability to like I feel like crowdwork would just be all I would have to do is I just be like I think that's one of my funniest it's the in conversations nowadays I feel like writing jokes is so like it's so difficult to write a joke that will land

particularly because it's like it's a good joke It's difficult to write a good joke There's so many experiences That vary amongst people that make things funny And things not funny You know Yeah That's why like it's just like I just don't understand

Something like that's why I like when people like Like most black comedians Their jokes are about silly black things You know because white people have to be able to like that comedic style You know Most Hispanic most Hispanic jokes are about like Hispanic people oh we dance We cheat

You know stuff like that It's like stereotypes It's like stuff like that. Like I feel like writing like jokes that are truly just like, oh, this is a good joke. Transcendentally. Let me give you. So difficult. Can I give you a little bit of like encouragement even though I know you're not going to do it?

We're past a threshold. It's probably not going to happen. But like even. You never know, man. Hey, okay. 34, I become a comedian. And I'm like at the on stage and I'm like honestly, it's never too late. I think the N words hilarious.

Like I'll tell you why. Look, it's never too late. And anyone who's actually, maybe they're curious. If you are worried about having a good joke, I want to say even the best. even the best comedians, they work, they do workouts. They shop their material.

And they refine it for a very long time until they think it's ready and good enough to be like on, say, they do a special or whatever the fuck. So if you think some of these comedians are like, man, they're so good. I'm like, yeah, a lot of them,

it took them a long time to get that good. They're not, not, they weren't all George Carlin who fucking like sat down and wrote a masterpiece, you know, and fucking shopped it for,

um, fucking performing. it for like a few years and then wrote another not a few years a year and then wrote another thing and wrote another thing like not everybody is like has that ability but i would say most people are you know they're taking their sweet time and how the joke started off which if you go to local shows you'll see and remember i remember how that joke started off and it's kind of cool it's like an insider little baseball thing we're like i remember i remember i remember we used to this and switch this around that's cool and you know i think i am more i'm more of a jo rogan type where like i can

be friends with comedians, but not a funny person. You're not going to be. You're not going to be. Listen. But I would respect not try to become a comedian. I think that's where it would be. I'd be like, oh, I understand this is not where I belong. Kingston.

A few times you've done this, I, listen, I do like that you disparage yourself. It actually is fun for me. But also at the same time, I'm like the fact that you would even put yourself in the same ballpark. Joe Fronkin is so unfunny. It's crazy. But I think that's where, like, I have the respect where I could be, like, I could hang out with people that are funny.

Like, we have funny friends. I can hang out with people like that. Yeah. But then I understand like, all right, this is the art form that you're a part of. I'm not going to step into this. I'm not going to do that. But this is, like, I can make you laugh. If we hang out, we can have, I can make you get some laughs in.

But I'm not going to enter the space that you're in. That's not respectful of me. You know what? Speaking of this, we got a question that some, that kind of sort of, it's a bit of a stretch, but I think you'll understand. Why not? Cometheus wrote in, he says, hey, snarks, uh, over the years, my humor has improved. One of my friends even said that I've gotten way funnier than I was before. Here's the thing.

I'm just as unfunny as I've always been. it's just that I've stolen 90% of my jokes from you guys the reason why I started listening to the podcast is again the reason why I started listening to the podcast is to get more Chris content but I stuck around because all three of you are genuinely funny your senses of humor I don't know fit mine to a tea how can I independently get funnier where should I start what do I have to do I think so that every time

someone laughs at my joke I won't feel so fake and This is fine, by the way. No. You are, no, that is, dude, comedy, okay, professional comedians shouldn't steal other jokes. Yes.

Professionally. Professionally. Right. Outside of that, jokes are supposed to be shared. And South Park did a, that Kanye West fucking episode, brilliant,

because it had Carlos Mincea, which I don't want to give Joe Rogan any credit, but damn, Joe Rogan started that whole thing where he called out Carlos Monsea for stealing a, boatload of jokes and then it got it all it made into a south park episode but the idea was

timmy right not timmy a jimmy jimmy wrote a joke and then cartman took credit for it and was trying to like get he was getting all mad and jimmy was like bro it's just funny that everybody it's cool that everybody's sharing it that's the point of a joke and so you're literally doing just that and that is 100% fine you don't need to be like oh by the way i didn't make this up like fuck who gives the fuck he pulls them aside he's like honestly dude i didn't want to i was nervous to say this, but I stole that one. Yeah. Your friend's like, fuck you, dude. Oh, he gets mad.

Fuck you, dude. Don't you lie to me like that. Why don't you fucking lie to me like that, dude. You fucking asshole. Fuck you. And he's like, I'm sorry, man. I just, I saw you laugh, man. And I just got, I, it felt good. It felt like to get a laugh at you finally, man. He's like, dude, seriously, don't ever talk to me again.

Don't come to my house. Don't call my phone. Don't call my phone. Fuck you. Yeah. Let me, look, man. Well, let me put it. Shut up. Let me put it this way, though. If you genuinely feel bad at all, you can always, before you land a joke, just say,

oh, I heard this, you know, like, you know, it kind of, you don't need to, but like, say a lot of times when, when there's a really funny joke, and sometimes what I'm doing is I'm kind of word of mouth and kind of selling the person. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'll usually say I heard this yada yada because I want, I kind of, I want to weasel. Like a lot of times I would try to weasel people into listening to come down. You know, I kind of just weasel them into it and be like, oh, yeah, like I'll send a clip or something and be like, hey, maybe this is what happened to me. I didn't discover Comtown independently.

It was a clip was sent to me. And I was like, what the fuck is? It's hilarious. And then there you go. So, yeah, man, do your thing. That's cool. Like, fuck. Yeah, I don't care about it at all the time.

I take everyone's jokes all the time. What I do is that whenever people are hanging out on me, I record them. I take, I take time to hear their jokes over and over again. I practice excuse. I still failed execution every time, but I practice it over and over again for days, about hours, about hours. And then I try to tell the joke and I fail the joke.

And I'd be like, oh, that's me. Then when a joke is organically me, I lie since someone else me. That is so insane. That is such a dichotic. That is ironic. Yeah. It's kind of crazy.

That's a terrible way to live. You're reverse practicing. It is always. is you're always in a state of you're doing something wrong, whether it's you doing it purposely or you're making it project on you. And that's a, that's a per way to live. You live your life as a complete conundrum.

Yeah, it's also worth noting that, like, most people's senses of humor are just amalgamations of things that they find funny themselves. 100% like regurgitated through the lens of, you know, whatever, whatever prism of self makes you your own person. But like,

I don't know, there's probably a bunch of stuff. I think that one of the bits on our podcast, I think, exists somewhere else was that that uh that little bit of give bit oh i think that's something like like that or that that at least spawned from something rick and morty well it's so so funny you just brought that up i i i was at a gym yesterday i saw and i watched the the compilation it was like i was i was doing deadlifts and i'm laughing like a freak because i was the first of all i was like i can't

like i hate that i'm laughing at our own material i know yeah it's like a weirdo but the bits were, dude, that fucking Louis Armstrong fucking taking the blast in World War II, that shit was genuinely funny. Like, I was just, I was picturing him holding back it. You had that bit, right? No, so you, you started, for whatever reason,

I don't remember, because the context is missing of how it got into it. That was all, that was all of ours. It was like a, it was like a collective effort. Because I was talking about, like, I can't remember, like, because the thing was that he was covered in sunflowers, because sunflowers absorb radiation.

And he thought that that would be enough for him to go out and withstand a nuclear blast. And it does indeed work for a moment. Yeah. For a moment in time. So I did want to, this is the thing that I was confused about, actually. So Kingston, you're the one who brings up Rick and Morty. Because you're saying they're like, I love this thing. Like it's in media.

And then you said Rick and Morty. And then I say like, yeah, like. it gives a little bit of give. But the weird thing is, I don't remember, because I was thinking of like, before that, where did that term come from?

I literally don't remember. So when I said that, I'm like, because I was trying to think, did Rick and Morty say that? No, no, no,

they just showed it. This is the guy pushing the car back and it goes back a little bit. I'm trying to think of why did I say that? That is a term. Like, it is a term, but I can't, yeah,

myself, I can't think of like, oh, I clearly, because of this. And so, but it clearly, I know I didn't invent this, but I'm just,

I'm confused on why it came up so naturally for me and I have no references in my mind right now. I clearly had something in my mind at that time. Yeah. But I can't think of any reason why I said that. That kind of weirded me out. Anyway, though, yeah.

That is a great, uh, how many, the, how it is recurring. So many times in such a stupid way. Just a little bit of give. A little bit of give.

Which is, it's good. The one with the guy on a plane and the guy goes to the front of the plane. It tries to cast a plane. We didn't, we didn't, um, uh, so there, you were going to Hawaii or something like that. Yeah. And this was not like, it was completely passed over. But for whatever reason, I said like, um, a plane with a turban or something.

Yeah. And like, there's, there's something about that, like, the visual of it that I was like, this is, this is homeless fan. Get on it. draw where would the turban be that's right on the top of the plane i was trying to i was trying to i was trying to picture where the turban would be imagine the plane has a face right where the top of the head right where the top of the head like kind of like a thomas tank engine type shit where there's like okay yeah okay i see i just love how raced is the terrorist plane yeah i don't think his name would be thomas though to be fair it'd be like it'd be like

plumbers. What is the, what is the, I'm so bad with Middle Eastern names, unfortunately. Yeah, I don't, I can't improvise Middle Eastern names. Rashid, uh, okay, Rashid. I'm trying to think of one with tea. It's just not working for me right now. I don't know anyone's with tea. Actually, I think, I think anyway, I guess Tarreek.

Damn, Tarreek. What are we talking about? Tarique. Tarreek, the turbine, the turbine wheeling, the turbine, the turbine wheeling. What is a, what is the name for? What is a word that has something to a plane that starts with tea other turbine? I, nope. Plain synonyms that start with tea.

I'm picturing a swingy doing this on stage while he's performing. Yeah, I'm Googling it. Completely workshopping. There's one jackass in the background giggling, though. This guy's fucking hilarious. These guys. This guy's fucking hilarious.

Holy shit. He's next up. I love the giggling assholes. Look at him. I appreciate those assholes, though, that are just there. They're like, just having a good time. Nothing's happened and they're giggling. That's how you're supposed to be.

That's what I do when I go to shit like that. Yeah. I'm just having fun. Someone bumps the mic and then someone's like, and I'm like, oh. We're going to have a good night tonight tonight, right? Hell yeah, hell yeah. trying to high five people.

Hey, give me some. Give me some. Because like what's, what is wrong with that? Like, what is wrong with bringing that kind of positive energy anywhere? Well, listen, if I was an open micer,

I would appreciate the hell out of that guy. But if I was in the crowd. Shut the fuck up. Piece of shit. There's nothing wrong with that, dude. I think we need, I genuinely think being kind doesn't cost anything.

Might as well go have fun. I like, charitable, being charitable, pity laughs are good. I think that's crazy. Pity laughs are good.

I have faked laughing and made myself laugh really hard from it plenty of times. That's, I mean, it makes sense. It's like, it's like smiling.

It's like fake smiling and then genuinely smiling, all those things that that are proven to actually help improve your, it'll improve your mood. If you fake smile, your brain might actually connect to something that makes you smile.

I've definitely, I laugh my hardest when I just finished crying too. That's kind of. Because like if, because at that moment, I'm just emotionally vulnerable. So then like someone comes into there, just like something happened. Like, I remember this one time, I got

I got a beating for something when I was little. And then my sister slipped and fell. And I laughed my ass off. Oh, that's great time. I laughed till I went asleep. That's excellent timing. So I always thought you were talking about laughing without any motivation. Like you had Joker serum or something. Oh, no. Like you were like, you were all fucked up and you're crying because you're all turning and then all of a sudden now you're laughing monetically. No, but then like you, like, well, then you see yourself, you know? Like you look at

yourself and you see yourself and your fucking, your foot is like angled under your fucking hip in the way it's a pause. But you're like, that's pretty funny. That's pretty funny. You start laughing again. I've only I've I remember being so tired I was like laughing that was a that was what I was like oh I'm I'm on the border of insanity kind of a thing and I was with three other people and we all started like laughing because we all cut you all without saying anything we all understood we're it's like why are we up we've been up all night the sun's up we drank too much and then there's just laughing and suing because we're we're damn you're insane yeah you're doing that one guy goes lays that on the table in the middle of the room starts coming and spinning yourself around

there's a sprinkler come in all over the place like you can't laugh there's no quicker way to turn me feral like that is

that is a way you're like how do we how do we revert these I can see it animated about my

is he spinning fast he lays on he lays on He lays that, all the pants that lays on the table and just spins and just busts it all over the back. How far away he is from the mic is. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

What's the moment? Does that, did that, is that, can that guy come on command or was he working on it? It's a mystery. It's a mystery. It's a mystery. It's a mystery. If you pay close attention to the footage the whole day, you can see what he's been doing. He can see his pants lightly kind of moving throughout the day.

This guy's been, he's had a pre-built bonus whole time. So crazy. Just speaking of a devency, I guess. Yeah. This is a wild question. But someone paid to read it. So like we're going to do it jerking off a dolphin rod. And he says,

is Master Roshi a good guy for not being a rapist? Because he is a pervert. And with how powerful he is, he could easily get anything he wanted to if he wanted. So is he a good person for keeping to himself? Did he? Did we mention that? I swear.

We touched on this, but it wasn't a, it came up naturally and I think it inspired this question. Okay. Because, yeah, okay. You're not a good person for not raping people. He's doing bare minimum. He's like bare minimum. Yeah. You're not a good person.

But like, oh, because the idea was, yes, okay, I do kind of remember because he, he's an ultra pervert, but like he doesn't, he could so easily do whatever he wants to do, the average human and he doesn't. Right. So maybe he's not a good person, but he has. restraint, you know? I think there's an element of it because it's, you know what it is? It's like, um, I think you guys are teetering on a really dangerous conversation.

I think we just sound like your average religious person. Is it braver? Is it braver to do something you're afraid of or to not have the fear anyway? Like bravery comes in by doing something that you're afraid of doing. If you're just too stupid to be afraid and you do something that is a natural state. Listen, listen, listen, listen, listen. Listen, listen. What do you mean the natural state? What are you saying? Bravery is not a natural state, you know. What is it natural state? What are you talking about?

Being existing is none of do with bravery, right? At the point where, like, being a good person. Sure. It's something that usually has to actively, like, you don't, there's nothing heroic about not raping. I'm not doing anything, you know. What I'm saying is to have the ability. No, but like if you, let's say, let's say this, if you are a unic and you have no sexual desire at all, right? Like you're neutered, you're sterilized, right?

If you, like, if you don't do anything like that, who gives you shit? Because like you're not even pulled in any of those directions. You still could do it though. Like it means nothing for you to not do it as opposed to the person who has to act. The person who has to actively fight against evil in his own heart and wins constantly. I would argue kind of probably is a better person. I don't think that's how that works. Listen, I think there's an argument to be made that there is kind of how.

There is an argument. This conversation. Listen, you're a dangerous conversation. Yes, but that in this one, and that's why I'm telling you this is a dangerous conversation. I know one when I see one. I know there might be, you might have some support when you see it through the lens of how a lot of Christian people define morality. The morality is basically God will destroy you if you do this thing. So then they usually ask.

say questions like, well, why would people not murder, kill, and rape if there was no God? And so, which makes me sighed them as a non-religious person because I'm like, oh, so you're just saying that you would do all these things if God wasn't there. That's crazy. But, you know, so we're going with that logic. We're going with the logic that's a master Roshi is good because he's resisting the urge. Now, I don't know exactly what that. It's not God probably, but there is a reason why he's resisting. That makes a religious, person good because they can go to heaven. I mean, Masoroshi is good.

I think he's just horny and then a little scary. And I think that is not inherently the worst thing. I think he's, if I remember correctly, he's grabbed at women before, right? Like maybe Krillings girlfriend at one time. Yeah, I think so. The one that kind of like Bulma.

Has he, has he assaults anyone actually? He might have. I feel like that he has. Probably at Japan. I feel like he has that we've seen that we've seen. I don't, I don't have any, um,

examples. I know he said, crass stuff, but I don't really remember. I've seen him do like the, like, like, and I don't know if he's done anything.

He's actually done that. But that's still, that's still enough. That's still enough to be like, yo, what are you doing, but like, but since he has the power of a God,

you know, and could essentially do whatever he wanted. Yeah. It is. And with how horny he is. And that's the thing. You can respect the fact he hasn't done anything. But him being an ultra horny pervert, which, you know, it's weird that I even have this right here.

That's crazy. Oh, no. It's why do you have that, Derek? He's my fucking Lord and Savior. What do you mean? That's crazy. I'm trying to be like you, Master Roshi. Yeah, so he's a.

That's crazy. And look at him. And there's him fucking, yes. He's absolutely. It is so, it is so defining of his character that there is a toy of him doing this. You know what I mean? You know what's funny? How crazy it is.

So we went to the, we went to the Japanese like fair or whatever the fuck it was called, the Japan Fair. And Jojo saw that and said, oh, that's cool. So you want that? I was like, I'm not fucking buying that. She's like, I'll buy it. She bought it for me. I wanted to go to that fair. I really wanted to go.

I was going to propose to Lily there, actually. Shut up. Should go next. Oh, that would have been very. What's the, I was trying. I was going to say some. know, slurrish, I'm not going to do that. But, you know, it was fun. Go next year. You just go next year. I don't think he's a hero. I think I think I can respect that he doesn't do that, but I'm not going to get him brownie points for not assaulting somebody. You're not a good guy because they're not assaulting somebody. By that means I'm a hero.

Yeah. I agree. I agree. I did. But it's also like there is a, I don't know, man. Like if you're a, if you're a drug addict and you and you're able to stay away from drugs, It's more impressive. It's better than like just some dude who doesn't give a shit who isn't doing drugs. Like you don't get any props for not doing drugs. You don't do drugs. Who gives a shit about you? Exactly. You can respect that he's never done it as well.

You can have more respect for someone. Like, oh, you never had the temptation to do it. It's like, no, you're like, oh, that's interesting. I can respect that. Sure. But at the same time, he could be like have more respect for someone that got off of them as well. But this for him, he's taking advantage of someone is like is not. people's natural states.

So you would someone like, because other people, there's like plenty of people could go around doing that. You don't want to pat men on the back for doing that. Like, oh, I'm a man. I could be. He's like, well, you're psycho because most men don't do that. What's the name of that white guy that couldn't open a pickle jar? That's insane. Was he on that podcast?

He was on that podcast. Oh, yeah. I don't remember his name, but yeah. He said shit like that. And I'm like, brother. You lick snizz. Remember, oh yeah, you like snizz. You should have got the thunder to it.

He should have got a fucking, he should have got to the neck for saying that. Never heard that before him. Pussy SNZ, I think should get you peeled. I think it should get your skin peeled off your bones. You should have a potato peeler right there just started working on it. I think anyone that says shit like that should get stones put up their asshole. I literally never even heard that before. I never heard that before or since.

That is very true. So like that's entirely something he made up. Snis is very white American. Like I wouldn't know what SNS was if it wasn't in context, right? Because he's saying you lick SNS knowing that that girl's a lesbian. And I completely understand what he's saying. But if someone was like, man, I want to go get some SNS, I would be like, what the fuck's that? I would have guessed that it.

I would have guessed that it was like viscous boogers or something. You know what I mean? Like snot that looked like jizz. You know what I mean? Like that would have been my assumption is. But it's pussy? Yeah. What? Why is it?

I don't even. Now that I'm actually, I'm, I've never actually thought about it. What makes it? I was like, something's got to make sense. Okay. Let's figure, let's see. Let's see what Google says. What is sniz?

And why is it called that? What is sniz? And why is sniz? Okay, let's see. What is sniz? What is going to? Snizz often snit. No, okay.

See, it immediately doesn't know what I'm talking about. Often, uh, a lime green mohawk sporting fair. A lime green mohawk sporting ferret character from the 1990s Nickelodeon animated series called blam. What?

There's a farrick called snizz. Snizz and fondue. Holy shit. I forgot about this thing. Oh, that's right. Completely forgot about this. That's crazy. You said that?

You said fondue and it. blew all those memories back into my head. I didn't know there were ferrets. Maybe Urban Dictionary. Yeah, yeah. Snizz. Okay. Is it two Zs?

Yes, it's two Zs. Okay, slang for a vulgar term for a woman's vagina, I guess. I've never heard this in my entire life. Popularized by TV shows like South Park and American Dad. Oh, it's derived from snatch. Oh. That makes sense, because that's a term. That's an old.

Gotcha. Okay. Okay. Okay. All right. That's that's exactly what that perfectly answered it because I was, I couldn't make the connection. Yeah. Snatch. Just a stupid way of saying snatch essentially. Okay. Very stupid Why not snatch? What's wrong with saying snatch? It's not even if it's an actual word It's just say pussy I mean that too you You can't say you like pussy

Pussy you eat pussy you lick pussy It's funny they also says lick He didn't even say eat Like you lick Yeah He doesn't even understand Like it's like a cat drinking milk or so they I just imagine like

Like you know like it just So I man Dossile That guy sucks so bad That was kind of like when Ben Shapiro was talking about wet-ass pussy Was talking about like oh have her having like a condition or something from she must be fucking sin yes I'm like you're telling on yourself Ben you're telling on yourself I just want to dash hot water on him dude

I've loved to see that like like it's like it's like it's at the point where like any hotter and it would start evaporating I want water to that hot Oh my God I'm fucking boiling Jewishly. Oh my God. That's crazy. You're not that part. You're not that part. That's crazy. His amica's really tiny. You can only put it on a bench appear a Lego now.

There's like there's like there's not to be a bench of here like all right. There's like bursts of steam coming off his back and they all like it's steam clouds of the star of the star. That's crazy. Yeah, this dude's special actually. You know, maybe something was promised to him. I don't know. That's crazy. He is the Jewish.

is these. It's just like his, how does your voice get like that, man? For real, though. Like, how do your vocal folds make that sound? You just got to be born like that. Like, what is that? How does that happen? You got to be born to do it. He probably sold his sinuses

for fucking a couple of bucks. All right, let's move on. We're getting into territory. What is this? What is this? Literally pissing off my necrotic Dong into the toilet bowl, wrote in. He says, explain it in detail.

That is crazy. It just falls off from it being so fucking, just go. I don't even want to picture anymore. Explain in detail the process of how each character from the main SpongeBob cast atypically pleasures themselves while taking note of anatomical factors. Please keep your hypothesis concise.

Fuck you. How dare you? I dare you ask that. And detail-oriented and refrain from using any unnecessary vulgarity or expletives, as this is a delicate matter for educational purposes only. So Sponsrop clearly, he takes several penises and all his orifices. Then he gets filled with cum, then he spits it out like he does in the intro of the episode. That's a clear one. Not come.

That's, come is vulgar. Oh, sorry, semen. Right. Injaculate. I appreciate that. I appreciate that. I appreciate that. Sandy cheeks, obviously.

she, what you call it, she gets a lot of come inside of her suit and then comes out of it. No, no, no, I'm sorry, a lot of, sorry, a lot of, come isn't in the vulgarmy, but I'm sorry. A lot of ejaculate in her suit. Then she comes out of her suit with her cheeks filled rather expansively and then swallows it all. Okay. And she says, yehah afterwards. Patrick, I'm assuming Patrick has some sort of dildo apparatus attached to top of his rock that slams down on him over and over and over again. until he, you know, he finishes.

And then Mr. Crabs, obviously, he, I don't know, it's something involving money probably. I'm assuming it has to do with his shell as well, too. Maybe him running on a penis until they, it's like climaxes and it makes the little sound of them rubbing together. What do you mean running on a penis? You know, the sound he makes, you know, like that until it busts and a little flutter.

on a penis. And it busts into his shell, then he explodes out with, like, coins and excrement all over the place. With coins. He's a little more difficult because that's due, has to do it money, obviously. Yeah.

I just, he just busts on money. I don't think he does, like, anything else other than this. He busts on money and eats it or something like that. I think Squidward, I think Squidward sounds himself with his clarinet. That's completely obvious. And he puts it up his own nose and he just,

there's a mirror though. It's right through the carinet. It goes from penis to clarinet in his nose. And then he just like, and squeeze it out all to the floor. That was so awesome. Yeah. We got rades out his nose.

I'm glad we went over that. A cock, a cock, a cock, a cock, a cock. That's so stupid. What does Plankton do? Plankton just watches headtie. I don't know. He just watches, yeah,

Of the computer. On Eve, I guess. Oh, interesting. Interesting. Is that a caron? We don't got to get into these. We don't got to get into everything. Okay.

All right. I would have done every character. No, it's too much. The Flying Dutchman is the most interesting, I think. Yeah, he's a flying Dutchman. The Flying Dutchman definitely. Wow. He doesn't have anything for this.

I see that. So he has a little sock, right? He's a little sock, right? So he definitely ejaculates into that sock, gets it hard as he possibly can and buries it somewhere. So he goes to find out later on. It's like a little trip for him and Spondraub and a gang.

I was looking for an episode when he first got introduced. You're good. You're good. You're good. There's your cum sac. You're good. I do want to read this. This is just for me and then we'll move on immediately.

Kingston versus brain aneurysm. Spoilers he loses, Rodin. He says, hey, Chris, just want to let you know that the glass snapples are a permanent thing in New York City. They only have lemon and peach. The only good ones. Okay, good.

But they no longer have limited edition. on them anyway. Would you give Sweene stage 4 rabies if it meant world peace? World peace? Yeah, I think for sure. Like he'll be fine. One person? Babies has stages? I never thought about that actually. I feel like

rabies is just kind of one of those things where it's like if you get it you're kind of fucked. Yeah. It's like, it might be stages technically. The stage is probably about like I think it's probably literally if it's like stage it's probably like cancer then because you know you can deal with cancer within stages and the stage four essentially stage four rabies is the coma stage of clinical rabies which follows the incubation. Okay, so you're just in a coma.

Would I put Sweeney in a coma for World Peace? Yes. I think he would be noble enough to, I think, agree to that, actually. Fuck you. If you're states four, that means you're pretty much your organs are fucked, right? Like you just get them all replaced, I imagine. Does five stages of rabies, recognizing human incubation. acute neurotic period comas

and then death yeah damn yeah never mind dead um unfortunate well I know rabies gets stored in the spine

like as it infects your spine it fucks you up further and then you eventually just you're just you're cooked yeah I just know that like it'll fuck up your your organs and um

you know you can't if you have rabies you can't donate them can't donate your organs if you ever had rabies You ever have ever had rabies You ever If you die from rabies

Well you Like yeah That makes sense You know It's like Because some people Apparently some people die You don't know

They weren't tested for rabies They give you rabies organs You got rabies too Wait a minute I think I'm just describing An episode of scrubs I think that's what I'm doing right now Probably

And you gave someone else rabies Because you gave somebody rabies What I'm describing I mean, there's double rabies. And I'm just describing a show that's not based on actual science or, or medicine. So I'm just going to, like, not going to, like, it sucks when your pet get rabies. Your pet is just like what's going through is so sad because it's just confused. I've never had a pet.

Like it's lashing out, but it's like it's, it's lashing out because it doesn't know what the fuck's going on. Everything is fucked with it. No. Look, I lived in New York City, luckily. I've never had an, even upstate. It weren't like money rabies cases in like where we live. I mean, I imagine most people get their, their, their, uh, their pets vaccinated.

Like, does rabies vaccine? I didn't know there was rabies vaccine. I thought the rabies. I thought it was like literally you get something after you get rabies. I don't know there was a vaccine for it genuinely. Maybe I'm, maybe I'm retarded.

It's not that. I just assumed that was part of it. When I'm kind of like, you know, the average person when you get vaccines when you're a vaccine as a kid, I don't remember most of them. I remember like, oh, I got some, but you know, there was a concoction of stuff that like, I don't remember what everything is.

Yeah, that's why I know that's why they also have this saliva Because they fucks with saliva glands And animals don't have the ability to just like Because humans, when we get rabies, you don't fucking do that We just get confused and upset That is so weird Why does it know this that Can it hear me?

So I just typed in, is there a preventative? And then the first, the first thing, rabies vaccine I didn't know there was a vaccine And I'm like, nigga, why would you eat? I'm just weirded out why is that the first Did you Google rabies earlier? No. You did the stages of rabies, right?

I didn't. I didn't. Oh, damn. He did. Chris was. Yeah, so it's clearly listening to you. Yes. That's fucking weird, man.

Or it's just so common that people are for some reason want to know about preventative. And then it finished rabies vaccine. It must have hurt me. That's fucking stupid. I hate this shit. There's so many rabies things. So yeah, yeah, but yeah, there's preventive rabies vaccine. That's why I imagine that's like, yeah, veterinarian specific trial.

Yeah, that's exactly what else. You do it because there's so many rabid animals. We had to get the vaccine for our little kitty since we found it outside. Cats doing well, being a little shit, probably going to like, next month we're going to have to get a spade, which I'm not looking forward to. Just get rid of it. Just get rid of it. Just get rid of it.

Instead of having to pay for it to get spayed, just get rid of it. Get a new one and just keep cycling them. Or next time I'm going to mail because getting a cat neutered is so much cheaper. a male cat neutered is way too. Just cut ball on. I can do it all myself. Slap its balls off and then you're going to go.

Off. Off. Slap his balls off. Put a bandit over the open wound and let it rock. One kick, one quick scream, you know, it calms down and we're going to go.

It calms down because it's in a coma. That's it. Chris, you can yells like a person. Oh! Oh! And then it's fine. Then it's calmed down.

And then it goes back into cat mode. My, uh, Steve. Chris hasn't eaten today? Interesting. Please tell me more. Rodin. Says,

Hey, hypocrites. I need some of your iconic sage advice. There's a fat guy at my job that smells like aged sweat. Oh. Like he genuinely leaves a trail of scent wherever he goes and it stays in the air for a good 30 seconds. No. He's not in my department and I can't.

I can't imagine no one has talked to him about this, but it's still really annoying. What should I do? It's beginning of your brother. It literally tell the manager. Yeah, talk to HR and higher ups. If it doesn't happen, then it bothers you that much brother to get a different job, quite literally. I mean, I would say, he's just done that's crazy. I would say, if you guys share a fridge, maybe if he brings food in, maybe poison the food, make sure he doesn't come back to work.

Of course he has food. so it's either clear yeah yeah he's definitely bringing some stuff so i mean what other options do you have left really i feel like um i feel like that's really the only thing you can do really yeah um treat him like the glutton guy in seven you know that's crazy like i think there's a fat guy and saw i'm sure there's like a similar thing just do yeah yeah, do that, whichever one it is. That is rough, man. Like, working with people who have, like, intense body odor or, like, being around.

Like, that always blew my mind that people even have that in the first place. Yeah, I don't. Not noticing it is the problem for me where it's like, dude. It's like, I can, and I can get pretty stinky, but it's like, I can smell myself. And if I was moving my smell, I'm like, I got to go, you know, clean my body off, obviously. That's the thing that upsets me is that. that I would say probably nine times out of 10, they know they stink.

They just don't give a fuck. Because you can smell like your, our noses are designed to smell putrid stuff. So we can, you know, stay away from it and not get sick. And so they can smell it. Unless you start like,

like a rotting part of his body or something like that. In that case, you got bigger fish to fry. I mean, like, it's time for to amputate whatever part of this fucking body. is but but it's like yeah you I don't know man I think I think that's crazy I just I just look I've lived with some people that uh because I used to rent rooms a lot um and some people they don't

some people would shower shorter than like I would feel like I how could you possibly soap your entire body and with how quickly they just jumped in and out like sometimes like during the summer would be so hot, I would jump in the shower for about a couple of minutes, just to cool off. Yeah, you just rinse real quick. But that's how some people just shower normally. And I'm like, that's not enough time to do. To hit all the, even the like this, the four, you know, the pits, the asshole, the fucking

the groin, the crotch. There's not even enough time to do that. Inside your asshole. Yeah. Yeah. You got a, you got a large intestine. I do have a exfoliating soap, you know, with the, with the beads. I put it up my asshole.

make sure it's scrubbing the inside of my colon. You walk in somebody and they're showering and you look at them and their shoulder deep, their elbow deep in their own ass. Just like fucking gain everything. You can see their hand moving on their lower tummy. And you're like, what do you do? I think that would actually make me sick.

The fact that you said shoulder and then undid it because you understood that was crazy. That's too ridiculous. You can get it to elbow deep. You can get elbow deep. If I saw someone's hand moving inside them like that, I think I would actually, that's viscerally disgusting to me. I would scream. I got to like a little girl and I'd run out of the bathroom.

I would hold the bathroom door closed. You can't get out of there. I can't let you in the room with me. Call the cops. Somebody call the police. Yeah. Man, poor dude, man. Seriously, there's no way that I would.

I would put up with that. I actually, I, uh, I, I, I was going to complain about, this is when I worked in New Egg. And there was an older Chinese lady that clearly just her customs is just not give a fuck. She didn't stink or anything, but after lunch, she would just fucking let them rip, dude. And, um, it really upset me. Like, but the way, let them go. So the way that, oh, man, it was crazy. But the way that I fixed, because I was going to be like, I was going to tell my lead.

But then I just requested a fan. Just blow it. I just blow it her way and it fixed the problem. I was like, all right, good. We're good now. But that's just, crayons, it's like, you're so rude. And then, you know, some of them grew up in places where they weren't, you would throw your used toilet paper in the trash can. and so they had to put those signs up in our trash cans because they're like, hey, we don't do that here.

We can actually, our pipes are good enough to flush it. And even with the signs there, in Mandarin, they still did it. So you're like, nah, I don't believe it. Can you please just adjust a little bit? I don't need you to wear a 10 gallon hat or anything. But could you just like, you know, expect these small little customs? They start your garbage can directly, Derek. the trash can next to my fucking my my my cubicle

it's just hitting it is shit full blown bathroom's full I'm sorry the bathroom's full and they just shitting in your straight in your garbage kid while you're looking at them I would grab a tower a computer tower and I would just smash their fucking head

with it like they're sitting hard they're doubled over just shitting and you're like yo dude what the fuck And they're just like, sorry, the bathroom's full. I'm full of shit. They got to do something about this.

I would take a motherboard and throw it like a shirukin and land it perfectly flesh in their eyes. You know, just like, I would be so fucking upset. They're like, ow. And they keep shitting. They make some shit more. Yeah, he's just sitting harder and faster. Ouch, ow, I got to finish up. I'm getting really hurt here.

Yeah. It overflows. Let me do double time and they just start fucking pooping. That shit was, dude, they would, I love that they would bring, because they would bring these awesome custom lunches with glass and stuff. But so much garlic and fish. And I'm like, you fucking cuss. Your meal looks delicious.

But God damn. Break room smell crazy. Jack the Ripper. Do you remember that old thing on Twitter where the Indian guys were like having the party? And some people with the black people tweeted. Oh, no. The question. And it smells crazy.

Yeah. That was one of the, that was the last really hilarious time on Twitter, I think. Yeah. I bet it smelled crazy in there. That was my final time on Twitter being like, oh, this is genuinely hilarious before it turned into just like, oh, this is just. Because that is, that is, that is bigotry 100%. Well, it's crazy what it turned into, right? Because that, what he said in there was mildly funny, which it is because I'm like, I agree.

probably does smell crazy in there. And then it turned into just racism. The most racism you could imagine. And you're like, this is really, guys, you're saying the worst slave ship this, this and that because someone said it smells crazy in there.

Like, you got to match power levels. What you guys do? Just attack him. Attack him. But then what happens to the internet is a bunch of idiots. We'd be like, oh, it's, I don't know. It's always, for me, I always believe I've become such a, I become such a si-op of a person now

where I'm just like, everything's a siop to me. I'm very much so believe that people are like, I'm black, but this on Twitter. It's like, you're not black. I bet you're not black. I bet you're just some person that's getting shilled to say they're black or an AI to go and further worse things about either group of people you're talking about. I think where people get caught those sock accounts where they forget to sign in.

Like, as a black man, I forgot who did that. Somebody, um, there's a bunch of people who've done it. It's true. It's a common thing. as a black woman and it's like some fucking white congressman yeah yeah exactly that exactly that like you're Danish nigga what are you talking about you know I just like I don't do that myself I'm like I grew up with the internet and it's like and then seeing these fucking like dorky dudes that clearly did it like they don't really understand Twitter or anything like that

having sock accounts in doing this I'm like you like I'd expect someone younger to do that but you Like, okay. You're not sophisticated enough to pull this off with the effectiveness that it requires. You don't have the technique available. Right. You don't got the tech. Jack the Ripper was playing against plumbers for real, road in. That's true.

Bums. He says, hey, Island Boys plus Derek. Me and my friend recently got into a friendly argument about who is more Jamaican. Island Boys. Before going to Carabana and I need to, I need Sween to settle it. I'm not the best Jamaican, well, let's go. Let's see what you got. So this is, I have an interesting conundrum.

Oh, man. What are we doing here, man? How homophobic are you? First one. That's a good question. But he, so he says, I'm biologically a fully white Canadian. Oh, no. And my parents had an amicable divorce when I was three.

They remained friendly and shared custody, 50, 50. both my parents remarried What? Both my parents remarried to my Jamaican stepdad What? They both married your Jamaican stepdad? They both remarried

And he was probably saying he's raised by a Jamaican stepdad. He's fucking crazy. Is it supposed to be and my Jamaican and not too my? Maybe. Probably. I just love the idea of this Jamaican guy finding love in both. Like the idea that they have to reunite together to be a thruple because they both fell in love with the guy that replaced them.

Too, man. Being gay on the low and refusing to admit it and having a fucking boyfriend and I know two wives and shit. Well, listen, listen, both my parents remarried and my Jamaican stepdad who has been in my life since I was five. And my Jamaican stepmom, what are we doing? I'm confused. So both his step parents are married. His parents are both with Jamaican people. That's what he's saying.

Okay. So they both. It's simple. It's context fellas. Who has been in my life since I was seven. Okay. So you've grown up with him. My friend has a Jamaican grandfather and the rest of his family is a mixed bag,

mostly Chinese. Nice. It's very common in Jamaica. Very common. No other relation to the island. I mean, there's cultural and genetics at that moment, you know? I would actually probably say that. Yeah.

Neither of you are particularly Jamaican, really. But, yeah, I mean, if you've got two immediate family figures since you were seven, I think that probably takes it. Like, it's like me. Like, my grandma, my dad is Jamaican and Cuban. My grandma who raised me is Puerto Rican and St. Tomian. I am, I consider myself culturally more Puerto Rican and St. Tommy that I consider myself Jamaican. but that's because I was raised by. Genetically, I'm more Jamaican in Cuba than I am anything else.

That's why you're homophobic. It's in there. It's in there. I have to actively fight it. Correctamundo. So now, so you have to actively fight it. It's there. I'm simply not homophobic.

It's there. It's there, unfortunately. I make an effort to be like, all right, this is not the way to talk about people like this. It's not the way to refer to people because I understand this is incorrect. I'm just, I'm a fucking queer. I was also raised to my fucking brother's dick. But so what is your gut say? Because my guts tell me it's just like,

I'm a Jamaican grandfather. Because having step parents that are Jamaican doesn't make you Jamaican, you know, at the same time. Sure, but like you're not, what I'm saying is like of the two. I don't know. I think it's, for me,

mostly it matters culture too. So like whoever, whoever has the most culture. That's it. Do their parents check up Ockian saltfish? Do they freaking do they dance? So culture matters more. You think? I think technically, yeah. So what would you say to this one?

Eminem versus Wayne Brady, who's blacker? That's crazy. That's such a dangerous one. Wayne Brady's black at Eminem. That's crazy. Are you sure? You know Wayne Braves from the same island my grandma's from? Wayne Brady said come in the improv, sir.

Does that mean you're not black? If you do something that's out of the norm of black people? No, I'm just saying who's blacker? Because if culture matters. Like people don't do improv. That's crazy. We got to improv every day in white America, literally. Yeah.

And you constantly get killed by police when you try. And we fail still, but we've got to try. But we got to try still. The goal of improv is to make the people laugh, not to get the cop to kill you. It's crazy. It's crazy. What are you? It gets laughs.

It just ends up. I don't know. Cops are hecklers. It gets laugh. Cops are hecklers, dude. That's the problem. That's crazy. That's the problem.

Every black person cop interaction turned into a turn-based RPG when you've got to try to talk them down. It feels like that. It feels like you got to say the right thing. Or you're going to have fucking dire consequences. I just try to avoid them. That's it. Did you ever play a...

It's like an RPGs and you see an enemy and you just run away. run away. I, man. But I can't run too fax and they'll notice me. And then I'll aglow them even more. Yeah. I like the, I like the newer ones that you can actually run away from that you can visually

see versus the old like old school. Random. It's the RNG of just, oh, I travel 30 fucking meters. I'm, I'm pretty much going to get into a dumb, and counters are genuinely one of the few kinds of mechanics that I've seen disappear from video games. Because it was such a dog shit idea. They're not good.

They're not good. That's why you play Pokemon. They give you items to lessen. Repel them. Literally. Literally. That's crazy. That's an item.

You cannot meet Pokemon weaker than your Pokemon. Here's this spray that keeps them away as crazy. And I'm just like, why did you put this in? If you put this stuff in because you know how fucking annoying this shit is, why is it in here? Because you have to level up and train Derek. But I would do that. I would do that on my own time because for me to beat the best of the best, I have to be at a certain level. So like I would do it on my own.

This guy. Like it should just be like, okay, these gay, like the grass. You only step in the grass to get fucking fights. Like something like that. I would love that, you know, whatever. So reactioactively. It doesn't matter. What am I saying?

Yeah. Paul Atreides wrote in. Okay. He says, Chris, I had a dream last night where I was you getting beat up in an alleyway. Damn. What a sucky go at it, huh? That's the entire right in. That's cool.

Sorry. Sorry, dude. Thanks a lot. Sorry you and the guy that was you getting beat up. That's such an insane thing to say. Punk ass. I'll cry about it. What is this?

What am I saying right now? Show me. Just show me. No. What? I don't go. Go, go, go, go.

Avenge sevenfold makes music for men who slap their own asses during sex. That's crazy. That's so bolder. That is a hysterical. That's so vulgar. That's insane. Whap? He's slapping.

Whap. Oh, that. What was that? What was that? What was that? Nothing. Yeah. Get me.

Get me. Yeah. Says, hey, you three. This question is geared more towards Derek due to him being the eldest. Was the Iraq War slash Afghanistan propaganda this retarded? Oh, like, I guess in relation to like how things are going now with Iran. Don't think it's possible. It wasn't.

No. It's way stupider now. No. It was. It was relatively competent except for, I would say, the mission accomplished thing in like 2003. that was like what do you mean mission accomplished like nothing

you know what I mean like you so that was really stupid of course it was kind of everybody swept that on the rug but for the most part I think it was successful into the weapons of mass destruction in Iraq

and dealing with Saddam Hussein was very good propaganda the babies being thrown out of incubators and stuff very good propaganda I think they did a pretty good job in that way and they didn't have the internet wasn't as prominent and then there was no smartphones. So it worked pretty well. Now that you would expect people now to be on their toes, you know, cross every I cross every

T, you know, dot every I cross every I cross every T. You would have to be so good at it because it's so easy to debunk. And then we're just realizing they're like, oh, I think people are getting stupider somehow. and we don't have to try at all. And we probably mentioned this many times before, but when Trump realized it in real time at a rally, when he was trying to talk about the economy, and people were essentially like yawning.

And then he says something about trans people and everyone starts cheering. He's like, wow, and he essentially says, I'm paraphrasing. He says like, wow, you guys don't get a fuck about what I'm saying. You only care about trans people, essentially. Kind of throwing in their face and they laughed about it. And I think that was when he was like,

oh, we don't have to, why are we even trying? And it got way worse. and way stupider to the point where RFK Jr. can be talking mad shit about Trump this entire time saying he's responsible for the pandemic and the Operation Warp Speed and the vaccines and all this stuff. He didn't drain the swamp, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. And then just a few months before the election, he just flips and then joins with him. Starts throwing him crazy.

And then says when he's being, when he's basically, you go on for your interview when everybody's grilling him and shit, he's like, yeah, I think Trump did a great job. And it doesn't matter to any of the people that support them. And I'm like, oh, yeah, you don't have to try at all. So, yes, the propaganda was way better. It still wasn't great because people were still stupid back then. But at least I saw the, like, I saw, I saw how it was easy to consume and actually be scared. The attacks happened.

Saddam Hussein was not a great leader. so it was very easy to be like, we need to go destroy them. The baby incubator thing was great propaganda. Like, you know, obviously hurting children's on great propaganda. All that stuff. I didn't know any better probably until 2005, 2006 is when I really started paying attention to politics. I'm like, oh, this is all fucking bullshit. I was like, holy lo, it was happening.

And so, yeah. For me, it was the Sandy Hook thing. That's when I was like 18, I think. Was that 18 or were you 18 at that time? I think you were a little older than me. You were still in high school, right? I was 2012. When Sandy Hook happened?

Or you did out of high school. Was it 2012, right? Was that 2015? Am I tripping? No, no, no. It was definitely before I finished high. It was definitely before I was like 21. Okay.

I was not 21 yet. I think it was 2012. Well, how old were you then? I was 18, I think 17, 18 at that time. And I remember then that's when I kind of lost hope because I was like, oh, this is like when you have to do something, right? Yeah, yeah. 12. And then it did nothing. And I was like, oh, okay, that's when I got disillusioned. That's when I stopped. Like, I kind of started caring less about it. And then like, 2016, the Bernie thing really burned me out. Like, that really did damage to my psyche. Did that do in a different way, though? So, like, say did the, did the, the Sandy Hook thing kind of probably made you feel disappointed in humanity that we didn't get together? Well, Sandy Hook made me realize that these motherfuckers don't really want to change stuff. And then, bro.

Bernie made me realize that it's like, oh. Who's that like the like the like the like do you think the politicians or like do you mean like us? Oh the politicians for sure. Okay. I don't I don't. I don't have faith in like the political structures we have. Okay. Those things are completely.

Totally understood. Okay. All right. That shit broke my heart because I was like, are you serious? And then right after that like when Bernie was winning and then they made those calls and it was like no and not anymore. And I was like, what? why are we okay with that? I was like, why are we okay with this?

That's fair. I mean, those were two very big moments. I imagine for a lot of the younger people, Yuvaldi was that because Yuvaldi is so crazy. I think Yvaldi is genuinely the most egregious one by far. That one bothers me the most, like, it's not the most like, it's the fact that they were just outside. That shit really.

hurt me. Oh, detaining a parent that was trying to rush in actually. That shit really broke my heart. One snuck in, though. One snuck in, was able to sneak in and get their people out. And then seeing the body cam footage of it, Rachel, when you got to see it later on, because obviously, you know they didn't want

to release that shit. It's mind-boggling and then still to have the lobbyists still fighting hard to not change anything and then people still not changing anything and making excuses. That shit broke my I think that is a

I feel that's way more of an indictment though on us than than the politics because I expect the politicians to be fucking snakes and horrible people and we're supposed to keep them out and it just shows I'm like okay the average person actually doesn't give a fuck to the point

where you can only activate people if they're like Manchurian candidates if they're like fucking in some kind of cult to the way oh hey everybody go march to the capital and then they do it. They wouldn't have done it if he didn't say anything.

That's the crazy thing. That shit nearly killed my spirit. I've never been so like just heartbroken from something like that in my life other than Yvaldi. Yvaldi really like broke my spirits. I was like, holy crap, dude. It's because everything should have probably after, because unfortunately there's many examples even before Sandy Hook of just horrific things happening. And that one was kind of, it should have been the crescendo

and that should have been it. That's the apex to end all everything, right? The way that people said the fucking World War I. Do you know what they used to call it? The war to end all wars. Yeah, he did actually. And then like, oh, here we go. Here we go again, round two. Not that long. Let's do this one more time. All right, let's last one and then we'll get the fuck out of here. Yeah.

The girl who loves the eros. And he says, hey, boys, we'd rather fuck Black Widow with a dick or Hulk with a pussy? That's so easy. That's such an easy. Oh, Hulk with a pussy. Easy. Easy. Easy.

Easy. It's so fucking obvious. I'm getting those green juices out. I'm, uh, if knocking the Hulk, leaving the Hulk a quivering, orgasmic mess is fucking a, that's a feat. That's a feat. I can't do that. But I'll try. I was crazy fucking insane

You know when that when that question was actually posed in that way I don't know how many years ago this was I don't know if I was a kid or whatever It made me realize like what It made me realize like what was the like The thing that I don't like about men is actually just the physiology Yeah that's the thing that like oh what I'm not attracted to at whatsoever When you masculine features

When you picture the it's kind of like people watching straight porn And it's like you're not bothered. Those people that watch this of an eye, they're not bothered by the penis going in, but they're bothered by the guy if he's moaning or say, I'm now speaking to myself about myself. When they, they'll do a shot from behind, I see the man's ass. And like, I get annoyed. I'm like, I don't want to see this. I don't know.

Like the fuck as this is. I don't want to see the shot. Anyway. This four. Yeah. Who's so like. Not my hand raises up. Black Widow having a penis and looking like black widow, but then like say a masculine woman

with a pussy. I'm like, no, I don't want the, I don't want buck angel. I don't want to fuck Buck Angel. Right. Why not? Why not? What is happening? Why not? It is a genuine. I mean, it should only take like five seconds, but it's, it is an eye, it is an eye opening way to phrase that question. It's like, oh, yeah. I can just ignore the, I can ignore the penis. It's probably slashing anyway. Just give it. I can't enjoy a pussy if it's surrounded by a fucking by Alex Jones, you know, like you guys are, you guys are actually, I I'm genuinely like upset by how Wayne you guys are.

You guys aren't fucking men with pussies and that's truly bothersome to me. Like I just don't get it. Like I'm fucking both. But I'm definitely fucking men with pocies. That's crazy. Can I say? I remember the first time. I don't know if I said this on the podcast,

but I remember the first time. It was on rotten.com or steak and cheese. com, one of the two. I saw a trans man for the first time. And you were so used to running, um, like those ways. websites would always show a female male to female they would always show that you would see that so often to where I remember seeing like there was a couple at the beach and the chick had a way bigger dick than the guy and it was kind of like he'd be a leading thing and it was like oh it's crazy and then there was just a trans man spreading on a bed and it bothered me because I'd never seen that before and I never even thought that was a thing and I'm like

And I started feeling bad later. I guess that shouldn't bother me because it's just this reversed. But it did. It shouldn't bother you. It shouldn't bother me. It really, really, really did, though. But the really did. Yeah, here's the thing.

I don't remember. It attaches you off guard because of how un, what do you mean? Like, what would you say? Like, how wrong it is, how wrong it is. Like, it's like, how incorrect it is. That's so crazy. You don't normally see it. it so it is it is kind of one of those things like whatever like whatever that kind of thing would

pop up i'd be like oh i wouldn't be disgusted i'd be like just like it would be more just like oh like i feel like i never see this i can't say that i was disgusted it was just it was it was very surprising and i didn't like it really caught me off guard and i had to think about that like it kind of opened up a whole other thing to me that i never really even thought about existing kind of in the way that lemon party did to me little bit little party kind of fucked me up a little You didn't like lash out. You didn't like lash out immediately and like threaten people around you. You, uh,

11 party is one of those for sure. I just never thought about old people fucking. I'm like, exactly. Yeah, you just think like, no, that stops after a while,

right? You never think about that because at that age, you can't conceptualize being old at all. Yeah. That's the thing. Yeah. Being old is so alien to a young person's brain, you know?

Yeah. Is this like, oh, that, that it happens, but like, so what? yeah yeah

anyway yeah shout out to shout out to trans men dude you're you're uh you're you're all right you're you're totally fight shut up well you have a problem

with trans men no but what you're saying you're like shout out to transmen you're all right it's like dude just okay just shout out the trans men that's it move on don't don't linger don't explain why

it's man is Jamaica now here's the thing is it because I feel like they're far more accepted. Who? In some way, you know,

trans men? You know what I mean? Like, I feel like I see a lot less outrage about them. Because people don't know about as many as them. You know what I personally, I generally think it is because, um,

I think those gay, I think gay men aren't attracted to, I think the, um, I can't even, I shouldn't say gay men. The, the,

the, the, the, the, the, the ones that are always, oh, I hate trans people or something like that.

I think they just are, they love chicks. with dicks. They actually love that. I don't think they like masculine men with pussies. I don't think they like that so they don't say shit about it. It doesn't like it doesn't matter to them. The thing that bothers them is

it's the idea of like it's well it's it's them admitting their it's them obviously meeting their homosexuality and homosexuals tendencies most of the time but it's the idea of that like if you it's so insane to me it's like if I'm looking at this if I'm like if someone has if I'm looking at someone and they're like they're a very at

attractive woman presenting person to me, a cis presenting woman to me. What do you think, Derek? Oh, well, okay, well. I just, I just, I remember Andrew Tate talking about this very subject and saying something like, I don't know if it was

Scarlett Johansson. I agreed with. And then it was like Scarlett Johansson with a dick, or he's like, would you rather fuck Scarlett Johansson? I don't know if he said that, but he definitely said Hulk Hogan with the pussy. And I thought that was like, it's his exact same. scenario and it just popped in my head that I'm like he was trying to teach people I think to because I imagine he's into a trans women oh 100% yeah and so and he's like trying to justify like he you know to to a certain extent you can almost applaud him for that and only that that he was trying to normalize it and make it for be like that's actually it's actually why they arrested him because he was such a he was such a pro trans voice that's crazy yeah they got him because like hey you know what you were fine with you trafficking women but the fact that you were trying to normalize trans women

shot him that's crazy that's the reason oh my god anyway we're going to read the $25 and up names now remember you can go to Patreon the comments

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I don't know. I can't picture what you're looking at. So. Yeah. I'm just genuinely confused. I read it verbatim though. Like 1 dash like hyphen 0 dash

Dix and arch. I don't know. I missed that. I don't know. I also am not that familiar with BET to be honest with you. I'd be surprised if you were. Yeah. I watched it sometimes, but like it really wasn't. I don't even remember what I would watch on it.

Cortana's IUD. I got my dick in the water, balls in the sand. That's crazy. That's outrageous. Christopher Nolan sucks dick at audio mixing. It's okay to be racist to Batarians. I'm a virgin.

I just can't wait for to Sha Boing Boing on a woman's bodonka dog. You really should be fucking castrated and killed. Yeah. You get a man. Don't worry. You got a gang. It's a climb. Dave Rubin casually butt chugging a gallon of Bacardi through a mile long silly straw.

That is so terrible. Now, is the silly straw itself a mile long or is it one of those things where it's like, it's a silly straw. So it's really only like maybe like three feet, but the, but, but the distance. It's twirling so much. Yeah, like. It's only like, it's only. It's three feet from one end to the other, but it's like it is a mile long journey. that the liquid has to go through.

A lot of twisted turns. That is a lot. Is it not still a mile long at that moment? It's technically a mile long if you stretch it all the way out. Right. Right. But in it's the way it was bought, in the way it was bought and created,

it's technically only a foot long. But there's so many, but there's so many twists and turns that go through it. Fitting a mile. Like that's an engineering. Feet. feet. If you could fit a mile of silly straw into one

foot of, maybe not length. Obviously, with you would have to go crazy. You'd have to go like really out of pocket. Right. So somebody should do that. Somebody should 3D print a mile long silly straw. You can print it in parts. Obviously you can, you know,

I love how you're allowing them. You're allowing them. Hey, you're allowed to print it in parts. Okay, I'll allow that. You're allowed to print it parts. I can't expect you to print a mile silly straw like on the face of it but I would like to see it I would like to see that done right same one foot is crazy I said

at least three yeah give you a little little room yeah give you a little bit like one for 12 inches is insane I mean you guys are you guys are not really trying to see shit change but I get it that's fine I guess so Mexican who had never Mexican who has never played years of war

okay so an Argentinian or a fucking South American you're not you're not a Mexican Don't ever call a Mexican Argentinian. You're not Mexican if you've not played gears of war. I agree with that. That's so insane.

Like if you're, that's, you might as well. It's like a Puerto Rican that doesn't like knives. It's like, what are you doing, bro? You're not real.

My friend's dad is like in his 70s and he still does PVP in gears. He's wall bouncing in his fucking 70. He's really exactly what this is. He's really just like that. This is exactly what combat was like. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Fucking wall bouncing and shit.

The dump slut known as Jolene, who happens to be driving a black catalog, a Cadillac in a slow parade. J.P. in the pain realm. Jordan Peter's in the pain realm. Eager for a bea-eigh, but it tastes like a fruit smoothie, that poor guy.

I can't believe me. I keep forgetting about the. I forget about the Beavie as well. Yeah. It's just sounds so dumb. It's so gross. I hate the way it sounds. Like the way Bibi sounds is the way that a lot of like automaton like NPC people talk about the word moist.

Oh yeah. Yeah. Or whenever people are like, I fuck I hate the way moist sounds. It's like, okay, so you have like a fucking zero IQ and fucking. That's mean. I adopt every opinion. Like, that's such a, that's such a, that's such a fucking adopted opinion. And I don't mean like it's an opinion for like an adopted person.

I mean like you, you took that from someone. Yeah. You know, you know, that's a lot of people, man. That's a lot of people for me. I don't believe it. I don't believe them when they say that. I think they heard, they saw a joke on Reddit 15 years ago where like, well, moist sounds gross.

And they just adopted it as part of their personality. I don't believe most people feel that way about the word voice. I think it's a fucking sigh out. That's great. All the fucking moist of the big moist. Big moist. Big moist. I'm just trying to trick everyone.

Big moist is coming at us. You got to figure out to stop a large moist. Big dry is trying to, it's trying to trick you all and thinking moist sounds gross. It doesn't sound gross. And in fact sounds great. Large dry is really out there ruining things. Cold brooking.

Cold brooking. Cold Brew King Alpha V. What would your Covenant Ship name be? Love you all. Pod has gotten me through some rough times. So, yay. So. Who gives a shit?

There was once a man who was Logirt, who made up a bucket of yogurt. He promptly put in, and then it ends, brother. You should have known. You should have known. A constant thing, only because you put an effort here. I'll read the rest. Uh, nope. He properly put in a long, a long lost foreskin and then he changed the name to, and then it, and then it still cuts off even when I click the name.

Oh my God. It's just not meant to be. Just not meant to be, buddy. Uh, Palantir brand ambassador. Oh, you got a fucking, you got a job cut out for you, bud. Yeah. IRL wall bouncing in a shootout. getting instantly shot at the balls.

Getting shot the ball is crazy. I love the idea of somebody thinking, like, thinking, playing these games is, like, really preparing them for something. Like, it's just like, I play gears of war. I know combat. And then they, they find themselves at a school shooter situation. It's like, not today.

And then they wall bounce and immediately get fucking lit up. Yeah. Wall bouncing die. Because what do you mean? You think you're going to travel. You get a travel crouched over. Listen, if they just try than someone can shoot you.

If they just try to duck and cover, they probably would have gotten like grazed like a flesh wound, but the balancing attempt, they caught every bullet. It's like not a single minute. Even the guy who's shooting is like, whoa.

I like, I've never been this accurate. Would that person be a hero? Because they absorbed every bullet. And so like, every bullet. There's more bullet in him than people. Than person.

It's like it's like magnetic. It's like what is happening. He's basically a sculpture of himself at this point. Like there's so much metal in him. It's insane. A culture is that is that is so mean. It is crazy, man. Mr. Berry.

He-he-ha-ha, I snigger from all the niggling chiggers. Whoa. Whoa. Playing fastball, but I get it. I get it's a throw. King Gaydora. I have no urethra and I must nut. You really should have said cream.

Mm. Yeah. I'll suck your dick. I'll eat your shit. Dune remake. Shai Halood with a Yamaka June. Shai Hajud is crazy. Shai Haloo is.

A Jewish sandworm is bananas. It's crazy. The transfem goblin vacuuming in Chris's vents. Guacamolei. gigapenus the third hot that's a great name I'm like I'm gonna get a peon I love that video

Sylvester Shalom I like that and it says parenthesis is rocky but Jew oh that's stupid I saw Chris sprinting in my neighborhood

at night and he clothes lined a baby I did not I do not I do not sprint at night oh Why not? That's when you're supposed to sprint, I feel like. Yeah. I sprint when the sun's down.

How far down? Like still up, but like not beaming. Okay, so it's not, so it's not down then. At dusk, is that what it is? No, dusk is stark, right? Isn't it? Like, what's dusk? Yeah, dusk is when the sun's setting.

Dude, don't fucking just fuck you guys. Okay. It's actually King's Sun, not Kingston. Oh, my bad. I've been misprouncing my bad. friend's name wrong this entire time that we've known each other he's never corrected me yeah once never once i just want to let you rock

delta gamma literally we've had this holiday last week wise is still crying evad niber and her wife devad niber uh blue sang healy you sir guildmaster that guy who made the tic talk on you is a big de for a van he thinks his music is all right too that's what I heard

that's what I heard he thinks his music's all right too that's funny that's that's such a good I love that that's an evergreen joke I'm just like I'm a big fan of Cosby. And his comedy's okay as well. Yeah. Yeah. You know, like that's a air type joke. Ging, Kingston, and EDP, but nothing really changed. That's crazy. That's insane. I would imagine a lot changes. Holy fuck. That's slander. Yeah, you got to fight that guy. I don't even, I, man, I don't even care, man. I can't even care, man. I just, I just, I really

really, really, really want your pet to die. That's it. I'm going to give you the prison with a mortar. Profit of Trump. It'll be the greatest journey. Whoa, Spider-Man stole that stripper's money. Spanking Sweene's balls with a belt. R.E.M. means rapid eye movement.

I thought it rent rape every Maldonado. That's insane. That's what that is. That is crazy. That must be regional. I guess. That must be regional. It must be regional.

It's crazyer. Regional is a lot. say fiberglass fleshlight LLC shocked over low sales Ronnie Radkees Rape's rake brupus Sloker 2 Why So Derpy Look up Dave Rubin Yoda impression

He is an earth-shattering Absalom Have you guys seen it? I have not seen it No but I hate it We were talking about it the other day That shit was funny We were doing it

Even though we'd never heard it Yeah I hate it when girls Sucked the stuff out of my weaner That's my stuff Give it back It's crazy That's mine

Let's the coach saying stop That's mine Marty mop in mouth Uh Uh Marty mop and mouth And hates the taste of bricks faveli Rubbing shit on my lip called out a pumaan chew

Mabozia you dirty Edward Nice The Demo Nation, exemplar of energy drink and bivers, the Snark Tank's resident V-tuber, Professor X, killing himself after reading Jordan Peterson's mind. Yes.

He just rolls his fucking thing into traffic. Yeah, yeah. Oh, God. Round-eyed Asian invest. He mind controls his cells to die. That's funny.

That's good. See, round-eyed Asian investing thing in a ball stretching machine. It's crazy how your nose just produces infinite food. That's gross. All right. That's so gross.

Ew. Ew. That's so gross, man. I never understood that. I would see that in TV shows, like gross kids where they would eat the buggers or whatever. And I'm like, people don't do that, do they? Like, I've seen adults do it.

It didn't. Sort of mistaken, man. I've seen adults, dude. It's fucking crazy. You're sorely mistaken, my bojah. I can safely say I've never actually done that. That's such a crazy fucking thing. I don't understand the...

Why would you want to eat your burger? I literally never understood that. Even the impulse of it. The impulse is alien to me. Like, I just... In your mouth? No. Blow it out on the ground. Wipe it on your friend.

Wipe it on a baby. Baby's best to wipe it on a baby. Baby's best to wipe it on. Because you can just blame it and say it's the baby. That's crazy. Dumb baby. Look, it's snotted everywhere. Look, it's snotted on the back of its head even though I can't reach it.

Oh, look at his dumb-ass baby. Brandy Hutzel quit their day job and has no plan. Queen of Fab Hazard. Paralysis demon mom dani living in the five boroughs of your mind. I've seen that. That's crazy. Bald-blue-y-old baby hate its own buggies and slap it to baby. Bald, blue-eyed German man waiting for the extra

finishing 33 movie with Sweenis Lune flying around Cut my come into pieces It makes my penis hard Uh A lover boy Girl Uh

I miss Sweenbot Chris Gay Gunn here I'm not reading that By the way I'm gay Uh Waiting on the Star Tanks Cinematic Universe Four swing set glitch GTA

Would Popeye win against Lower Accurate Superman? My mom calls me fat little guy little meatball. Wow. Or fat little gay little meatball. Emilio the chosen one, this way up V. Interlock your toes with sweet. I beg you. Hideki chop suey.

What do you own the ball? He Decky chop suey. It's crazy. It's insane. I get groceries delivered and I'm not disabled or a retard. What if Canola Joe was the best the friends we made along the way? Forensic scientist who's a serial killer is just Dexter,

you adults. Is he a forensic scientist? I thought he was just a guy who was killing people. I think he's a friend of science, actually. No, yeah. That's the, I, um, I thought, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, did, I genuinely had no idea. Yeah. Yeah.

I thought the premise of Dexter was that he was just a serial killer, but he, like, killed the, the, the bad guys, but I didn't, I didn't know that he had, he was a forensic scientist. Okay. So I, that's, I, that's why I was like, I was like, wait, I didn't say anything, because it was already, like, whatever. Yeah. Andy Kala ass fucked by a whale

Sorry I can't I had a burrito Heath got teeth pulled Now drinking blended Big Mac Gids Executive Executive of Intercourse Oh Oh

Let's go I saw that I only saw that reason I was like What the fuck is this Yeah probably like a few months ago I don't know how old it is But I was like

I think it's funny I like that Tom Holland's been addressing it. He's like, I don't know what that means, but I like it. This guy is really great, you know? Like, he's great in every single way. He once showed me in the bathroom. He was like, what does that mean?

He took turns with Zendaya one time. I just said, let it be. I just let it be. I let it be. I'm like, I've had I to challenge the CEO of sex. Honestly, I really. I see him putting his Google glasses on, staring up

staring up my wife's skirt, and I was just like this, what the CEO of sex does? Yeah, for a fucking reason, eh? He's got a, he's got a familiarize himself, you know? With sex, you know?

With sex. With my statues. With my statues, with my statues wife, eh? He doesn't even sound even remotely like this. He sounds faintly British. That's it.

Yeah, it's a spider man. Like, it's there, but. Wow, I really didn't know it. Oh, wow, mate. That guy though The CEO of Sex, that guy Yeah Yeah

I don't know what's my man It's been four movies with these people And I'm like I feel nothing for you bro Like you got like it's crazy Oh I really like Ned I really like Ned I think I don't like him at all

I think it's because he's a minority But like mainly because I just I didn't like him until the CEO of sex stuff started happening So it was like outside of his character Which happened with me with John Cena I didn't care about John Sienin so all these memes started popping up and I'm like, you know, I think he's all right. And his name is Yong Sina.

Do do do do do. Yon Sina. Bing Chilin. Yeah, that's good stuff. I like Chinese John Sina's. He's pretty cool. Yeah, it's hysteria. I don't know why that hasn't become, I don't know why that hasn't just become his character entirely.

Like he should just stop being John Siener became what Chinese. I think honestly if he learned how to speak Chinese through being in the WWE, But if he knew how to do it first, that would have been his character in the 90s be joined the league thing. It certainly would have. It would have been crazy. Scalping Sweeney and he still has a good hairline. A mouse trying to get cheese, get the cheese in your foreskin. Low income, never low income.

Love it. Three howls for Shabreary. I don't know what that is. I don't know whatever fuck you. If I wanted any shit from you, I'd squeeze your head. Well, that would probably. work. That's funny. I like that. That's funny. That is good. Cracking sween upside down and diagonal

rape style. Oh. Whoa. I didn't get that part. I didn't get that part. I didn't get that part. Edition, man. Fuckface unstoppable, cardboard pie, come nut butters. If you hear this message, the curse has been lifted. Have a good day. So now that my penis is degloved, can I like, can I ball like Kobe? Uh, John Wicken is mad they killed his crow familiar

ridiculous that's a bar you it's not it's it's okay it's clever it's not a bar it's not a bar I wouldn't feel like that's crazy

all you guys do is tear down others man I just don't get it I care you down yeah you were tearing down trans men like a little while ago I literally did not I did not

roll the tape back I did not it's completely why is everybody so weird about me dating 17 you're wrong. You only like it. You only like it because it's good.

If it was evil and disgusting, you'd hate it. That is kind of how I feel about, like, a lot of the discourse around. Like, I saw somebody, I saw somebody talk about, like, because there's a new Spider-Man movie, so obviously the conversation is always like, you know, it's the best one ever or whatever. It's like, it's better than Spider-Man 2 or Spiremore 2 so much better or whatever. It always devolves into this. But, like, I saw one or it's like, Spider-Man 2 is just carried by, like, you know,

by a good script that's and it's like yeah is that really that's what a movie is it's that it's like that's insane to me what is the negative

ramifications of that like what is what is your point I love really dumb that's you only like it you'll be like that movie because it's well written is crazy it's like it's like you only like that song

because it sounds good yeah I'm like oh what am I supposed like what do you say to that what do you say to that these are the people that write gay video essays and try to try to

justify dumb shit. They just say stuff. And I'm like, shut up. You're just saying dumb shit doesn't matter. It's crazy. It's a good movie. I get people, people are too crazy about Spider-Man, too,

but like, let's relax. Yeah, like, to me, I saw somebody describe it as like, that's just quality slop. And I'm like, okay, we're done. Oh, so now it's a swap. It's over now. So an oxymoron, great.

Yeah, yeah, exactly. That really gave me an addict for real. That quality slop is hilarious. Quality slop is great. It is like it is the orboros. Yeah. Ultimately at this point it's like that's the snake eating itself at this point, but the closest thing. It's funny. It made me laugh. To actual content that would call quality slop is YouTube poop. You know what I mean? Because that takes a lot of effort. There's a lot of quality in this, but it is kind of just like proper sentence mixing.

Yeah. Yeah. Literally that's what quality slop would be. Yeah. Like a lot of effort put into garbage. Yeah, exactly. but yo that is mind-blowingly stupid man holy shit it is I just I don't understand like that in my life that is crazy like what is the reason to do because to me it just it's always like people

trying to do some type of revisionist history thing and try to justify like I don't understand the need to do that like why why does this thing have to be bad in order for this thing to be good I don't understand it's very weird yeah I don't get it's because it's because of the fact that people people assign too much to the things they like

instead of just enjoying it you know yeah like I I just, I don't know. I don't get why people I don't get it. I don't understand it, man. You only like that. You only like that's a little more critical.

You only like that food because it tastes good. Like, I'm more critical on Spider-Man too than some other people, right? I think it would spit somebody's not deny that it's objectively a great movie. Like, as a film, when it comes to making a movie,

it is a great movie. Yeah. Is it the best Spider-Man depiction? No, but it's a great film. Like, what the fuck? You can't deny that. You know something you can talk about like... You only like the practical effects and Alfred Molina and Willem Defoe.

And I actually don't like MJ in those movies. But you only like... You only like the iconic suit and the great shots of him web swinging and his power set. And it's in New York. I don't really... Yeah. It doesn't make sense to me. I understand what people don't.

like certain things, but whatever, man. It's funny weirdos. Yeah, like, I understand if you don't like Israel. I get it. I get it. The reason is why you may just like it would be different from mine, but... You only hate Israel because it's cool. I mean, I guess that is fair.

I feel like that's some retards are. I think that's kind of true right now. I think that's kind of true right now. Unfortunately, I would say, especially some people on the right that are just like, oh, fucking... There's, there's definitely a lot of people who are actually just anti-Semites. And they're just like, finally my time. The legitimate far right or happy as fuck right now, but probably also slightly annoyed that you're like, you guys are

hating them for the wrong reasons. You hate them. And they're Jewish, right? You're hating them because they're Jewish, right? Yeah, it's like, we hate them because of how they look and this stuff, right? They're not, they're not actual white people, even though they actually are. Right? Right? Right. And everybody's like, the room is quiet.

Yeah, the room. I've forgotten how scary hunters were in Halo having to bait their swings. They're like many dark souls. Scary? Chris, I saw it. I just get behind him and shoot them in the fucking back. What do you mean?

I saw it, Chris. Don't even bring it up. I got so mad when I saw that shit on Twitter. Wait, what do you? I don't even know what you're talking. The guys like, they made the hunters so fucking easy to kill them. I'm like, have you played the game?

Oh yeah, they're trivial. Have you ever played the game? They're actually scarier in the, in the remake because you actually, there's a, they still have that weak point, but it's covered by armor that you have to shoot off and it's not as easy to. Go ahead. It drove me insane. They're literally one shot.

They're literally paper. They're literally glass. What do you call? Paper tiger. Paper tiger glass cannon. Listen. You know, like it's nothing.

The only time I had trouble, I think, I can't remember which one I was playing. Maybe three. And it was on like the veteran setting or whatever. I don't know. On the hardest difficulty, they can kill you.

I was like, damn, this is tough, especially dealing with two of them. There was like a specific part of the game where I remember you, you did with two of them. I just like the,

I just remember there was playing. They always come in pairs because they're like their their their bond. They're like a double unit. Okay. But like in combat evolved in that first game, like that that pistol does so much damage that it one shots them immediately. Like it's fucking hysterical. So like I saw that. I was like you got to be joking.

There's people just pretending to. I don't know what like I don't know why people pretend to be fans of things. That's crazy to me. Like I really like like I don't give a shit what's going on in the, I don't give a shit what's going on in the Sabrina the teenage witch community. you know what I mean? Like the fuck do I like imagine I had something to say about it. Yeah,

yeah, yeah, yeah. Insane. What bothers me is that like, like I've never had problems with them other than like a firefight, I think. And that's it because they're just there, there's clearly you shoot them in their backs.

They have armor. Yeah. Oh my God. I hate what's happening to my, well, I hate what's happening to my band base. They're harder in later games because later games don't have that pistol.

But like when they were talking about they made hunters easier to kill and hail. a one specific. I'm like, you're fucking, you literally just don't know anything. Because that's the one game where they're literally the weakest thing

on the battlefield. Yeah, I imagine what happens in this. It's like you said, pretending to care. Somebody, they watch someone who pretended to care, and then they parroted their talking point. It's just incorrect.

I've seen that happen many, many times where people get their opinions, the thoughts and opinions from other people that don't know what the fuck they're talking about. But they sounded confident, right? they sounded confident and sure like I think I've I've done that with stuff before like I imagine some sort of bullshit theory that I sounded confidently correct and then I fucking also spread it like a retard so you know Did you know that you're gay?

Say it was so much confidence The person that you're gay. You convince someone. Oh, I am. Yeah. Shit. Oh shit.

I am. I am a homosexual. Goon devil versus Connor the man who rapes. Booty Wonderland. Earthwind and Dick. I fan romance when I start to dance, dance, dance,

dance, Booty Wonderland. Still sin. I could fix Miriam Pataki. That's crazy. That's the mom, right? That's Helga's mom. That's,

oh, I always do it. I gotta be real. I can't, hmm. She'd be a mess. Miriam Pataki, I barely remember. I remember the dad more than the mom. Oh, I remember her.

She kind of seemed kind of drugged down, right? She's like, monotone. She's like drunk. She was day drunk all the time. She was a pills. Yeah, yeah, yeah. She had a smoothie problem. I remember her.

That's right. She was, it was smoothies in the show. Dude, was the dad drugging her smoothies? It wasn't, no, it's just her. It's just her. That's the drunk. Mr. Jimmy Jam. Was it dead drug?

A littleette. Chris might F around and write the Armenian Castillo. I don't know what that means. I'm not historically. I'm not well read. Paul Atreides. Call me hyperbolic the way I can't stand. Oh, hydrophobic the way I can't stand wetbacks.

That's crazy. Maycar, yellow peanut M&M voice. Who knotted in me? That was wild. Star Coffee. Well, guys, I got to stop it for two seconds. I just don't want to, I just stumbled upon a channel called Nostalgia 90s. And this guy does little video essays on dumb bullshit.

So this title is called The Woman Who Seased to Exist Without Dying, Miriam Bataki, 90s nostalgia. And I'm like, what the? What is that title, man? Dude, what is happening? I think it's a Spanish channel. How long is it? Is it six hours? No, it's mini.

It's just 11 minutes. Okay, that's all right. It's a Spanish channel too. That's crazy. It's just auto dub for me. I hate that shit. Have you experienced that? Hola, my gente.

That happens on Spanish things. Yeah, I get some auto dubbed and then it sounds awful. I hate it because I'm trying. I'm trying to learn a language and it comes up that way and I'm like, I was just like, dude, do it normal. I'll watch it with subtitles. We fucking do it. I don't need this.

Anyway, go ahead. Chris, uh, Chris is Sweeney's little anal butterboard stock coffee and the, uh, the other V-tuber putting analog cigarettes out on robot dogs. Ush, Dr.

Hocktibus, green goblin dick, Sandy butthole man and the gay lizard. Uh, queer eye for the straight guy, but it's Kingston eye for a guy who's not a fucking moron. Fraff, Sinanis, I did I did I. Craig the Canadian, Chris, your game was blood,

1997 by Monolith. Maybe, I don't think so. I've seen footage of blood. Everybody's going crazy for this game. It's your boy, Shawnee D. Ray Pete Parsons, Zach Rock is his true shot Uncle Owen. LeBron

is a sixer, motherfuckers. Go D guy finally finished Which are 3. Moving on to Dark Souls 2. Wish me luck, fellas. Was Dark Souls 2 the game of the year? That year, I'm not sure. Wouldn't that come out? That couldn't be. 2011?

Dark Souls 2? Yeah. Was it 2011? I guess there wasn't much in 2011. 2011 was I think Portal 2 and that was it. Wouldn't Portal 2 win? Maybe Gears 2? No, Gears 2 was a while ago.

So I can pretty sure Dark Force 1 is 2009, so I'm assuming 2 was 2011. 2011 was Gears 3, I think. Mm. Yeah, it was before I finished high school for all years. It was game in the year? Dark Souls 2, really? That seems kind of crazy. Anyway, yeah, I say I like Big Bucks.

Breaking News, U.S. Senator Lich McConnell has obtained both the hand and eye of Vecta. Do you see the video of him AI dancing in the middle of the street? No, no, I didn't. It's fucking crazy. Gay Master Chief, be like, I need your penis. Dick so dirty, they call me Richard Nixon. Game of the Year guy finished Shaq Fu starting Bubsy 3D. Dominican Bruce Wayne.

Me no bat, Poppy, me no bat. That's crazy. My mom loves guys common anal sex. That's why I like I am like I am because I'm like her. Economy's so bad I'm stealing the cop or out of the IUD as I go down on her. That's crazy. That's actually a wild premise.

Okay, so maybe it came out a different year. because 2012 was walking dead telltale which makes sense oh shit my bad my bad my bad my bad I put in the wrong year I'm fucking stupid walking is also before that I'm pretty sure 2011 is obviously what am I even saying Skyrim came on 2011

oh duh I can't believe 11 11 11 right wasn't it yeah it was November 11th 2011 I remember so that means the next one is coming out December 12 It's 3,012. Oh, fuck.

That wouldn't even... Let me see when... No, it wouldn't even... Yeah. Is that, did he actually put that? Because I'm... Oh, 24. Is he in 2014?

Because that... No way, did he come out in 2014? Are you fucking serious? Derek, are you okay? I'm going through it. He's got shell shock. I swear I remember playing it sooner, but apparently not. I think I'm just...

Because I remember being in Arizona at the time when I first played it. And okay, I guess it must have been in 2014 when I move back there. Jesus Christ, my timeline's all fucked up. So I barely came up and then I guess, okay, so wait, but 2014 was fucking, Game of the Year was, was Dragon Age Inquisition. Inquisition, yeah. Maybe it's, I'm sure it was Game of the Year somewhere. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Avenge Sevenfold makes music for men who slat their own axes during sex. Wage Slate 583. I don't think we are doing gay sex right. We keep slamming our butts together and we just wind up sore. The Pippini brothers hoping that Kajima gets the voice in the last episode of Smiling Friends. Donk, Donkerson, Dixon, butts, have you heard of slash played Valve's new Mova, Deadlock, Pee-P,

to counter women in gaming. We need a very, every male protagonist to look like Paul Blart. Jokes on you, Spurs fan. I'm not a Knicks fan. Please fuck me gay and hard on your 4-F-150. The Meanest Lesbian in Michigan. Check out the breakdown at 105 on the song Fish Dix by Slam Band. uh, Derek, I will pay you $24, $24.24.12 to devane Kingston's cock.

That would take a long time, man. I'm, I got, I'm not even a fiend up. Not even a full $25. is crazy. John Strickland, Gypsy dude, Jimithy, the first strategy, Keith David presents, ass too thick for just one dick, much too much gayness for one. And then it cuts off. Goops McKenzie. Oh, Goops McKenzie. I remember that name. saggy scrotum uh pre-rise do you guys think hoggworts ever had school a school wanding maybe probably man would not surprise me that's funny i feel like they're constantly doing that to each other all the time anyway to be honest yeah um beer is a dish best served car spilly poor miss and they just they just can you switching bodies with terry shybo that's

crazy why we should do that. Terry Shibos like, she was like a brain dead person from early 2000s or something maybe. Yeah. Late 90s. I can't remember exactly when. I only know that this family guy did a bit about it.

Yeah, it was a whole debate on like, say, the morality between life support, you know, pulling someone off and all this bullshit. Like, religious, religiosity. People baked into it. I remember the,

I remember the family guy really bit very vividly because they had a song called Terry Shivo is kind of a libo. Yeah. Kind of a libo. livo. It's really dumb. Vote Abdul. Bill Cosby be like, women say the darndest things. Computer make Kingston game. Monkey monks, monkey monastery. Dixie

Young Sweeney causes 9-11 after getting made fun of by an Indian kid. Super monkey ball. That new NBA game? Super monkey ball. That's crazy. That is. That is dead ass just distasteful. Well, it's Jordan. That's crazy. Jordan, you can make them funny.

That's just racing. That's funny. Brokeback Mountain Kermit and Peterson edition. Spoiled and out of shape. Replacing Sweene's vows, flashcards with a note that says, I came in the wedding gink. Captain Giniu's gender affirming

body swap clinic. Bigfoot Zapruder film. How many Dave Rubens could Dave Rubin Rubin, if Dave Rubin's Rubin could Rubin? Interesting. I recommend this podcast to English learners Sorry Miss Jackson

Ethereum has the past because he took a loss As his hard ass Progerian Hunter officially has a daughter Frying bacon with my shirt off Reacher from the Jack Lagoon Nice, it's pretty good Nefram and rounding out our list as always King of Appazard

You guys, all the Lego games are having a sale on Steam so We may not have You know the The Marvel games that were lost in time on the 360 on the Ultimate Alliance on that stuff because you can play very similar games

like Marvel Superheroes for $4 so at least they'll maybe scratch the itch a little bit Yeah, yeah maybe God is dead. God is dead he left me He left me here on this planet All right, we're heading out We'll see you next time

Patreon on the Compsize and Star Tank remember you can go over there Early access ad free exclusive episodes Ask questions, get your voicemails All that stuff so pop on over there and we'll see you next time. Yeah. Bye. Bye.