The Snark Tank - #53: CallMeConcerned

Episode Date: January 8, 2021

Recorded on January 5th It's kind of impossible for us to not talk about this since it involves our sphere and people that are tangentially close to us. Today we answered your silly questions and told some silly stories, but we also wanted to talk about this serious situation in a way that's more nuanced than some of the extremes we've been seeing online. We're not here to defend people abusing their power or to tear content creators down because it's trendy. This episode is about really examining YouTubers, their relationships with their fans, the cultural norms of groupies in mainstream industries, and what's really at the heart of these things.  This is a somewhat more serious episode and I think each of us feels a little differently about it, so even if you're not familiar with the drama, we hope this is at least interesting and maybe a little insightful.  Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

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Hey, look, if it's a little dead meme. Welcome, welcome, welcome, everybody to the Snark Tank podcast. This is the first episode of the new year. First episode of 2021. Yeah. It is. It's finally here. The bad year is over, and now everything is fine.

There is no virus. There was no election, in fact. In fact, FDR came back on January 1st and is now the de facto leader. Yes, to do his fifth term. All true. All true. It's crazy, dude. That's crazy.

Well, welcome to FDR's America. Yeah, pretty wild. It's a completely different world out there. So we're obviously just kidding. Everything is still bad. Stay home still. Please stay in your homes. Yo, L.A.

L.A. is like the epicenter of the world. I'm pretty sure right now. Again? Yeah. Well, usually it's Florida. Usually Florida is like the king. Usually Florida is. We're doing pretty well right now.

I think what's happening. in Florida is that so many people are dying and then going missing that they're not really accounted for in the death toll. Yeah. If you have COVID but you're killed by an alligator, you died because the elevator killing it, you know? You didn't die for COVID. Yeah. Or just like organ harvesters, you know, just like, oh, hey, a dead man. I will usurp this person and harvest them for parts, which happens pretty often in Florida. Give them a COVID heart. As a COVID heart. It gives me a COVID heart. Yo, can you imagine that is the long game assassination of that have like COVID infected organs for like political targets who need organ transplants? That is wild.

It's not how COVID works, but still, that's really. You know what I saw? I was thinking that I was like, I haven't heard any insane ramblings from Alex Jones in a long. time. So I went on infilwars.com because I wanted to see what the hell he's been saying about COVID and the election or something. And immediately it was the first two, within the first five minutes, it was exactly what I wanted to hear.

And so it was great. You know, the election was stolen. I was like, awesome. And then he was talking about, he's like, I have these bombshell numbers that less people died in 2020 than last year combined. And I was just like, wait, is that supposed to be bombshell shit? Like everyone stayed home, of course. Like everyone, nobody was doing anything so nobody could be killed.

But I think what he was trying to do, you know how he's trying to like have people get outraged and shit by saying, oh, not that many people died. But I'm like, yeah. And a lot of people would have died plus COVID if nobody stayed home. Like he doesn't, I don't know if he doesn't understand or if he's just being like the biggest bitch in the world. I don't know. But I loved it though. I kind of missed it. I miss that crazy shit, like, being on my timeline every once in a while.

Yeah. Well, as you say, well, as you, as you mentioned that right now, Alex Jones is literally trending. Oh, my God. What are you doing now? He's just in, he's just in D.C. Because there's like, uh, there's like something going on in D.C. I can't be fucked to care. Something about the president, like, threatening someone in Georgia.

Something. There's something. I don't know what the fuck. Yeah. Like, it's a, it's honestly like, everything right now, like, is stuff that I really should care about, but is, is really. really, I'm genuinely bored by a lot of it. Yeah, you're jaded. I understand. Not even just jaded. I just, I'm genuinely uninterested.

It's like, I'll be interested in everything that's happening now after, you know, Biden is inaugurated or after like some nonsense happens. That way I can just be like, all right, well, now we've got like a proper, now I know what's happening, you know? Yeah. But as it right now, it's just such a, it's just such a hassle. I feel yeah. Yeah. I feel you. I feel you. Yeah. So, uh, first of all right. of the new year.

So I thought we would bring it in with something that we kind of can't avoid because it's, it's the main story on Twitter right now. It's, it's, uh, it's, it would, the thing is it's like, it would be weird if we just pretended like this wasn't happening. Uh, I don't normally like to talk about YouTube drama because I find it like really genuinely boring and not that interesting. But, uh, I feel like it would look strange if we didn't. talk about this.

Call me Carson, who is a content creator. He does... I honestly don't know what he does. I just found out that he does Minecraft. Yeah, I didn't know that. Like, I was in... Simple and innocent. Like, I was... He had this game show thing

a couple months back that I was a part of and like, like, Pokemon was a part. It was like a pretty big thing. Like, pretty much everybody was in it. And a couple years ago, I was in a video of his at Pax, where he was just going to around interviewing people. And that's,

those are the only two times that I met him. I don't know if that's necessarily all that important, but I feel like it's relevant to bring up just to, just for a full disclosure thing. And, you know, when I met him, he was, he was, he was fine.

He was totally chill. But apparently, this is something that happened recently is he, how would you even describe this? So he's, he's being kind of drug through the mud, uh, dragged through the mud on Twitter right now,

because it came out, that when he was 19, he was sexting 17-year-old fans, which is a pretty big no-no, you know, I would say... It's not the smartest thing to do. No sex fans, bro.

It's not the smartest thing to do, and obviously Keem got a hold of it. I wouldn't go that far. Wait, what did you say? He said, don't sex fans. I wouldn't go that far. Oh, my God. I wouldn't go that far.

I wouldn't go that far. I wouldn't go that far. I wouldn't go that far. It's better as safe than sorry, you know? It is better safe than sorry is smart. That is the smartest thing. Someone could be any age. Someone can be any age if you don't know. Someone could be any age, but it also is extremely easy to verify age.

That's true, but it's also extremely easy to lie about age as well. Yeah, but if somebody's going that far, then it's like how fucking, then what can you, at some point. At some point, like, even if somebody makes, if someone even makes a fucking fake ID and you're in a bar together with somebody. Yeah. Are you real? Like, at some point, it's like, dude, I didn't fucking know, bro. No, you have to leave that. Hold on, hold on.

These are, do you need to, like, run it through the thing to make sure that it's actually government verified and shit, like how far you have to go? No, no, no, no, no. These are different situations. Like, if somebody is, is consistently lying about their age, I don't think, I don't think the onus is on the other person at all. I think, like, I think the person who's lying about their age is the person who's at fault.

Yo, dude. For anything that happens about that. I've seen way too many, like, like, cases, like a lot that people lie about their age. and then the person that didn't know anything about it gets like the full... No, no, well, of course, because legally speaking, they still... And that's bullshit though. That should be changed.

That should be changed. Yes. Yeah, no, I would agree. Those cases are unfortunate. In a completely factual world where, like, people couldn't lie, yes. Or people couldn't make shit up like that. Yeah, yeah. I would agree, yeah.

If it's, if you genuinely, like, thought somebody was like 25, and then they're fucking 16. I don't know how that's possible, really. But I just feel like if there's ways to prove that you genuinely were like ignorant, I think you should be okay. No, yeah, I would agree. I feel like in today's age, it's pretty fucking easy. It's easier, but you can still lie, you know.

You can still lie. Dude, I never told this story before because of how dumb it was, but someone tried to get me like that. Not like they were trying to trap me or something, I don't think. But some broad was like, oh, I'm 20. I'm like, cool, cool, cool. And then fucking, like, oh, let me, let me snap you or whatever or something. And I'm like, okay.

And when I, when we accepted the thing, I'm like, you have stories that shows that there's like locker rooms. You're clearly not 25. Like, get lost. Like, oh, I'm sorry. And I'm like, what the fuck was that? Oh, I'm sorry. That's just wild.

That's just insanity. That's just so crazy. That is, that is, that is, that is, that is, that is, that is, that is, that is, that is, that is, really insane. It's so crazy. It was one of those things where I'm like, that if somebody, I mean, that was just really stupid of that person, right? To just, like, you have evidence.

You're just a complete moron. Maybe, maybe she was banking on that, like, maybe I thought that shit was cool. Like, I'm some predator. I'm like, oh, shit, she's so young, that's hot. But it was just, like, kind of crazy in that scenario. But I feel like a lot of other people, like the Carcans of the world, would probably look the other way or something, you know, just because

they're like, oh, whatever. I feel like they would look the other way instead of being like, hey. To be fair, like, I knew plenty of, like, I knew people who were like, let's say, right now I'm two years older than my girlfriend, right? Yeah.

Oh, it's way too. That's a crazy gap, bro. Cancelled. Apparently, she's 24, I'm 26, right? If we were dating in high school, And like, let's say I graduated before she would. It would be a period of which you'd be nights. It'd be 17.

Sure. And that's not uncommon. That's, like, really, really not uncommon. I think what's super interesting about this particular event is that it is like interestingly nuanced in that regard. Because there are a lot of people. Like, I was 17 in college, you know, like, and I was like. Oh, yeah, yeah. So, like, and 17 in fairness in New York is the, I'm pretty sure is, is the age of

consent. Yeah. Is that true? I think so because I remember that I thought it was 18 but I'm I'm pretty sure it's 17 because I remember in college. I know that most of the United States is 17 or 16 which I blew my mind. Yeah but I but I remember being in college and my girlfriend was 18 and I remember kind of being worried about that because I was like you're canceling you're so broke I know you just got you just got your friend canceled you just got one of our friends canceled yeah no but it was like you know I don't That kind of thing happens a lot, like the two-year age gap. And like, especially like when you're in high school and you're like kind of transitioning out and then like when you use in college and when you use like in the last year of high school and it's like super weird. And it's like that happens like a lot.

And in fairness to everybody who's talking about this, I don't think, I don't believe that the age difference is the primary thing here that people. What do you think it is? I think the thing that Keem is running around with is obviously the age difference because it's easy money for. him because he is a roach. But I don't think the age thing is necessarily the biggest thing. I think the biggest thing is it's a dude with a lot of followers who is sexting fans who also happen to be that young. Yes.

You know what I mean? Okay. That, it makes sense to me in a sense that like, hey, a young fan, it looks really, really bad. It was texting a young fan. The one thing I think, I come from the world of musicians, so I feel like I don't have the same sentiment like when people are saying this whole power dynamic. I, in my opinion, there's ways, there's predators that prey on their power and prey on, say, the youth or whatever, and then there's people that are just reaping the spoils or the benefits or whatever. Right. Which is

when you're a rock star you have you have groupies and I never in my, this is just my opinion, because some other people may differ. I just never had a problem with rock stars banging their legal groupies. I don't care. I was tweeting about this earlier, literally about like, yo, like everybody that was talking about this is like, yo, imagine, just imagine how many musicians are doing this. You know what I mean? Because this is just an established, like, this is just kind of understood in the music

industry. That this is just something that happens. It happens so often that there's a, there's a term for it. Groupie. Right now with Ram Trucks declaration of deals, well-qualified current FCA lessees, get a low mileage lease on the 26. Ram,500 Bighorn crew cab, four by four for three-sixth a month, for 39 months, with 4,99 due at signing. Tax, title, license extra, no security deposit required. Call 1-877 RAM, 5722 for lease details. Requires dealer contribution and lease through Stalantis Financial. Current vehicle must be registered to consumer at least 30 days prior to lease to qualify.

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Earn entries all month for your chance to win. Only at Muckleshoot Casino Resort, the biggest and best in the northwest. Like that's a word that exists and everybody just sort of understands it. And I was like thinking about it like a lot yesterday. And as this kind of Carson stuff was breaking, I was like, why? Like what is what is the there? Because there is a double standard.

Obviously like the fact that she's underaged in most of the country. And like, you know, that's obviously like a problem. Right. Sure. So even if even if the age gap is relatively small, it's still. like, you know, better not to do that. And also, especially, like, when we talk about, like, the age gap in, like, when you're dating somebody in high school and they, and they happen to be in college or whatever, that's usually,

like, a relationship that existed that just so happened to, you know what I mean? It's not like somebody who's 19 going after somebody who's 17, like, right off the bad. Like, that's, that, I think, is, is more creepy than, at the same time, that's also not, like, It's not insane. It's not Jared. It's not insane. It's not Jared Fogel. But it's still like, but it's, it's questionable enough to be like, all right,

maybe you should like step back and not do that. But it's absolutely motives. I think it's the idea. I'm sorry, I didn't interrupt you, Derek. No, no, no, you do. Like even me, I've run into situations where I've just spoken to people online. I think it's just people want to see people fail, dude. I really, really, really believe that people.

that's true but I was going somewhere with the music thing where this happens a lot in the music industry and I was thinking about a lot like why the double standard exists and why is it that

online creators are kind of held to like kind of like a different rule book and I was thinking about like what are the differences between a rock star at a concert and groupies and the stuff that's happening now and the biggest thing that I

could see, or the biggest difference that I noticed that I could take a note of, is the fact that musicians aren't deemming their fans for months. They're not leading them on in text messages for a long time. And they're not really in communication with these people. It's usually they're at a show and random people come up and that's that and then everybody just sort of leaves. You know what I mean? that seems to be the difference because it's like you have a situation where like yeah

like you said like it's just famous people like reaping whatever like if dude if lady Gaga like if I got like a message from like Lady Gaga's official Instagram account being like hey want a bang I'd be like oh yeah how you doing of course I'm going to do that

and then like I understand that I'm never going to see this person again I understand like I'm being used it's like whatever but I'm also an adult so I can make that informed decision and be alright with it Yeah. But I do think a lot of it is that kind of consistent communication and then just like this like, oh, you know, because in some of the DMs, he's like, oh, I feel guilty, you know, and like it's like, and it's like you could tell he, you could tell even he's off put by it. He felt weird about it. Which is hard to defend.

You can't defend that. Like if the person involved feels weird, then how can you, it's like, bro. You know? Stop. Yeah. If you feel it's wrong, fucking just stop. You should be feeling good about what you're doing.

Especially when you're flirting and hooking up with chicks, you should feel, don't. If you feel guilty, man, come on. Never, never push past that feeling. Whenever you feel like something's wrong in a situation that involves any sort of sexual interaction or flirting, stop. That's it. Like, you just stop doing it.

You don't go any further. You don't take any more steps. You're like, oh, this is bad red light and you go away. Yeah. Yeah. I don't know. I think this is bad. I think this is bad. It's definitely not good. It could be worse. It's probably getting blown up a proportion to a certain degree. But yeah, I think, I don't know.

I think certain aspects I think are a little bit overblown. Like the people who are saying like Carson's a pedophile, that's insane. Like I just don't. I just don't think. I saw a thumbnail of a video. Yeah. Okay. Okay. Yeah. Like, all right then. Like, no, dude. Like, that's insanity, bro. Like, I like, look, he did something. He did something that was arguably not. okay and call him out for that but I mean definitely I think it was probably definitely not not okay yeah it's not okay it's not okay it's not a pedophile like that's it's a different thing it's a it's the thing man like on in in the world in this world that we all work in that we exist in there it's so easy it's so easy for you to have a moment of this genuine stupidity that is not more than anything in the moment and your entire life can be ruined mm-hmm yeah that is the most unappealing part of this for me

always has been on my appealing part. Yeah. And like, like, outside and tough. This is one real moment for me. Like one time I commented on someone's picture, right? And like the amount of people that fucking like snitched on me to my girlfriend was insane. And I wasn't even doing anything wrong. Would you comment?

I commented like a gift on a picture of one of our friends. Like genuinely like not like not even bad. And I was just like, oh, I commented that. Then like my girlfriend got it. And she was like, dude, what's up? And I was like, huh? Like, I was this very dumbfound. I was like, what's up?

Yeah. And I, like, and I understand it hurt her because of the perception of other people. But it's like, it's crazy how, like, that fast people just took to making things way worse than it could have possibly been. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Yeah. People love, people love to do. Like, I, I remember when, when Lacey and I were together, like, there were a bunch of people who were, like, like, initially,

when it first happened there were people who were like sending her like old tweets where I was like where I would say like retarded or something and like some and it's like are you okay with this and it's like what do you what do you do you like leave me a look first of all as if she doesn't know I talk this one but now people people do love to to just sort of see people it's always I'll put it this way. Like, it's always funnier to watch somebody fall off the ninth step than it is to watch somebody fall off the second, you know? Yeah. I think it's just, you know, that's just kind of, uh, sadly like a normal thing. But yeah, I don't know. Yeah, it's just what happens. The, the biggest thing about this situation, though, is I question the motives of his friends for them to, like, why now?

because they've known about this for almost a year. They said that, like, his YouTube friends that were part of that lunch... Lunch club, yeah. Ludge club, yeah. They said they'd known about it since March of last year of 2020, and they chose not to say anything.

And now it's very calculated to bring it out now. And especially if you're a friend, even a former friend, and if you care about somebody's well-being in mental health, usually you want to give somebody the opportunity to say it themselves,

you want to What is this really about? Are you trying to Is Carson a serial offender And you're trying to get the word out And raise awareness Is this the PSA? It doesn't look like that's the case

Because he was guilty From doing it right then and there If he didn't feel guilty You know then it's like Another thing too Where he's like oh he's probably doing this A ton of times He's going like crazy

And just hitting up all these girls and shit But he was like Whatever how you said Because I didn't read it But from what you're saying He sounded like He knew exactly that I was wrong. So I can't imagine he's doing like this with a bunch of girls if he was all like,

I don't know. I don't know. I think it was a few, but like, I don't know. I mean, I've only, I've only heard one 17 year old. I've only seen, I've only seen two examples. Oh, so you've seen two. But so there's two. Yeah, but I, I don't know. Like I think I might go out on a limb here and kind of defend his friends, I think, because this is a really weird situation to be in, where you're working with people and I think all of us know how easy it is to just get sued into oblivion for shit like you can't just be like

hey this person's doing this insane shit and then not have proof because chances are these people don't have proof all they could say is like hey you know this is what's happening this is something he told us

and then that blows into this whole thing and then there's no evidence for for months potentially because people aren't comfortable coming forward with it and then your life is ruined and it's like it is selfish I get it like it is definitely like okay well you're putting your own well being

above you know other peoples but I mean I don't know if I can I don't know that's a weird predicament what would you do it what would you do because like from my perspective if I knew somebody was doing some shit like that at first and foremost I would be like

all right, if you got to knock this shit off right now. I'm calling you out directly. Like if I did anything like that, Chris, I would assume you would like tell me like, yo dude, what the fuck? Yeah, no, I would, I would go person to person. And then at that point, I'd be like, this could completely fuck us all.

I feel like you should do the right thing and just air this shit out right away and then see if people forgive you. Just because it just like what's happening now, all these months, later, now it's blown up into something where I feel weird, I just feel weird when it's something like this type of information to sit on it for almost a year.

Or it's like, I feel like if I'm not going to say anything within the first few months, I'm probably not going to say anything at all. I just, I don't understand what's going on. As I understand it, there seem to be this assumption where it's like, you know, this person's their friend. You know, they want to give him the opportunity to kind of write, like, write the ship. Even if he doesn't come forward with it. at the very least to stop doing it.

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1,000 thank yous from Bloodworks Northwest. And give an opportunity to be like, hey, listen. But did he like continue or something? Was it like they caught him again? He's like, enough is enough? I don't know. Because I would understand that. Look, I don't know.

I don't know the specifics of everything. But I do, but I, but I, what I heard was that the contract had expired like recently. A contract had. The contract had recently had recently expired. So I think that's the reason. Well, that changes my perspective a lot. If that, if they were in fear of some type of NDA type of shit,

where it's like, don't talk about your homies on the team or something. Yeah. Like the type of a deal. If that, if that's true, then that would 100% like explain why, like, oh, we couldn't say anything.

Because, like, obviously there's, defamation is always a thing. But typically you don't have to worry about defamation. You can't. worry about being sued, but you can find a lawyer. If you have definitive proof, you can find a lawyer that will do it pro bono that will do it like, okay, cool. Yeah, no, yeah, totally. We will win. So it's like, you shouldn't have to worry too much if you know you have the proof. Yeah, yeah. So, but if there's legal things, like you said, like the contract expired, I'm like,

cool, I don't, I can't, I can't talk shit. I can't talk shit about those guys at all. This is, yeah, this is what I heard. Like, I don't know, like, again, like a lot of this, a lot of this is just kind of he said, she said, the, only thing that we know for certain is real are the are the DMs uh because you know like just from my own perspective if i saw fake DMs of me going around doing this shit i'd i'd squash it immediately you know like i wouldn't wait for it to blow up into this huge thing fuck no immediately say something i'd be like yo are you fucking kidding i would probably be joking all over the place about it because i would know how bullshit it is i thought about that though

because I've seen enough examples, enough to people that I follow people that I'm like, I watch closely or something. Or I think about this guy losing his wrestling career because he didn't go to, it was a wrestler, Inzo Amore. He didn't go to the company right away. He was dealing with it behind the scenes with the police, but he didn't go to the company right away

because he was just trying to deal with it on his own terms and not be like, I don't want to get fired. Because as soon as I say something, and they're going to like suspend me or whatever. But he ended up being suspended because of that. Long story short, it was a complete bullshit. Like this chick was like, you know, fabricated everything. Her friends exonerated him.

They're like, I have the receipts of her bragging that I slept with this guy. It was one of those things where it was of age, everything was fine. But she said, oh, he assaulted me. And it was complete bullshit. That's crazy. That's just one example. I've seen enough of them to where I'm like, that's frightening. How would I handle something like this?

You know, I don't think about it. I don't think about it frequently, but I've thought about it when I hear stories like that. I'm like, it's very easy for somebody to just concoct some bullshit because for whatever reason, they're bored, they want to get your attention, whatever it is. I'm just like, is I say number one, go to the police right away. And then number two, you can defend yourself. Who gives a fuck? Say something. I'm like, hey, this is bullshit.

Yeah, I just, I just think personally, like, I just don't know if, like, I just wouldn't let it get this out of hand if it was if I just knew it was false, you know? That's true. And I've seen... And I've seen... And I've seen... And I've also just seen enough like video proof where it's like you couldn't really...

You could fake it, but I doubt these like 16 years... I doubt these like 18 year old girls are like... Are that savvy? Yeah, I doubt they all have after effects, you know, and are able to like just completely fabricate discord layouts and, you know, like it seems really unlikely. That's a lot of time.

It's a lot of work and a lot of talent. Yeah. Not to say that there couldn't be. So what do you do? Have you seen because there's other people in the Minecraft community that have been getting busted? Minilad. It was the most recent one.

Mini lad. And I think there was somebody else too, but I can't think, whatever. But Minilad for sure. An apology. And then obviously, I think the Minecraft community is very youthful. So they really don't give a shit about all this. Not really. Yeah, probably not.

Because if you look at me, I saw Minilad's response to, and it was like, I think it was like almost like 50-50 of like, like to this like ratio where like all the adults were like that fuck this motherfucker yeah and then the younger people are like whatever just make cool videos you know like they seem like in the Minecraft community I feel like they're kind of safe almost like they can shake this shit off unlike say somebody who has you know 18 and above more like older audiences they're kind of fucked like you they're not gonna think about it's weird to think about that yeah it's strange I don't I don't

I don't know, man. I don't... This reminds me... This reminds me a lot. Paracinical, didn't it? Sorry. Oh, yeah, no, Pyrocytical. He had a response.

I honestly, like, I... I tried to pay attention to that. I still don't really understand what happened. I got a little bit of a gist of it. Yeah. Pyril is just a fucking a weirdo. You know, he's a deviant art weirdo. He likes, like, weird, furry fat porn.

And he would hit up anybody to draw that shit. and then some of the people that he hit up were like minors. And then I think he like invited one over to the UK. Nothing happened. But it was one of those things where it was multiple offenses. And then he apologized and it kind of just went away. And I'm like, this is weird. I did see his video.

It was a pretty good video that he made. Was it? Yeah, it was relatively compelling. It's still weird that he's doing any of this stuff. But like, I mean, it's, did it blow up more than, did, was that more of a big deal than Carson? You know what I'm saying? Because I feel like what, what, what? I don't know, man.

Yeah. It does feel like things are just sort of, um, like, I don't know what to make of a lot of this. It's also just, it's also just very confusing because it's like, you know. I mean, I'm, I'm going to be honest, man. How I feel to be like 100% honest. if you're not a predator, if you're not praying on these, these people,

I really don't give a fuck because there is some really fucked up shit going on. And I hate to always use that, like that trope of like, oh, there's way more serious things going on, but it's true in this sense where I'm like, I can't be that fucked about this. I can't, like, oh, what is this goofy-ass fucking loser Minecraft guy?

What is he? What is he? Like, what is it? As it stands right now, with what, with the information that we are privy to at the moment, here on this, the Lord's Day, January 5th, 2020. The Lord's Day. What I'm seeing is Carson probably just needs to, like, really take a step back and figure, figure his own shit out.

Yes. I don't think he's a pedophile. I don't think he's, I don't know, like, this doesn't seem. He's not like that Romeo. something remember that tattoo with the artist did you hear about that guy what do you do I it dude there's a there's like a real

hold on I got to pull up my Romeo look it's just a guy he's a he tattoos like all these famous he's like a YouTuber I got to take off my glasses Romeo La Costa

yeah yeah this is him I'm gonna type in what did he do Romeo LaCosta's petto what did he do Let's see. Because I can't click it because I got the Discord open. Yeah, so let's see.

He was, he was, it was like multiple underage girls. So in 2019, he was accused of sending inappropriate messages to underage girls. He admitted it on Kim Starr's channel, uh, drama alert. He admitted it on Drama Alert. And one of the young girls, and she was very young. He all, uh, Kim Star interviewed her as well. And he had like the, you know, Dick Picks and all this stuff. Like this guy was like, it wasn't like a two year thing.

It was like it was way more egregious and it was a multiple offender. He's like an actual predator that's specifically going out of his way to talk to young girls. Those are the people that like they piss me off like where I'm like you're, you're this famous tattoo artist that could and a good looking dude that can get any type of push that you want. But you're going out of your way to pray on these young girls. That's, I'm not seeing, what I'm seeing this pimply Carson fucking introvert that's texting, sexting a 17 year old,

I'm like, this guy's just a fucking retard. You know, I bet, he's making a stupid mistake. That's it. That's how I feel. Like he's not in the same league as that guy or I can't remember this other dude's name, but he was like 30 years old and he was like trying to, no, I know what you mean.

There's just some other examples of these influencers that are, actively going after these young girls consistently. It's not the same. It's not the same as like some crazy shit. It's still not okay. It's still like he really needs to fucking, I don't know, go to therapy or some shit. For sure.

Because it's, you just have to understand you have a level of power here in a way that is particularly different from a lot of other celebrities. Like celebrities don't DM their fans, you know? Like that's just not, it's not really a thing that happens. It's not, um, yeah, one time. What? One time I had a famous, uh, lady comedian. Uh, she didn't, she didn't DM me, but I feel like she was about to because she just like, The fuck does that mean, Derek?

Look, let me explain. Let me explain. She started liking all of my pictures on Twitter. And I was like, what's happening here? Who was it? I'll bleep it out. So, um, uh, I was like, well, what's going on here? is like, is this about to happen?

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And then I DMed her a little bit, but nothing really. But I was just like, I think that was the closest thing I've ever, that was like, it was kind of random, bro. I was like, wait, what's happening? Is this, am I finally in? Like, is this, is this, but anyway, I tough, I definitely agree with you, though, that it doesn't like, that typically doesn't happen, especially a lot of, it's, the older generations, like, they don't really, they're not used to that.

This is totally different. Yeah, this is. in Gen X is using fucking discord and Snapchat and shit. They're not doing that stuff. It's a completely different type of fame and you just have to be aware of just like hey, you know, listen, people's audiences are made up of

different ages and you just can't you just got to be smart about how you interact with your fans dude. You just can't be like... Be smart. Don't be like a fucking idiot. Exactly. It'll be like that. What's that big note, pro Jared? Like where he was

he wasn't trying to to be, from from what we know, he wasn't trying to hit up underage girls, but his lane is Nintendo and shit. So it's kind of like, don't be fucking

stupid. You got to know where you are. I know where you are. Know what you're doing because that should just leaves of problems. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, I don't yeah. I don't want it to come across like I'm just like sitting here like blanket defending Carson because it's just not necessarily what's happening. This is just like, this is just how I feel about it. And this is just my genuine opinion where it's like

you got to fucking, you really got to take a step back and calm down. It's like, for me, I just think, I think the age difference isn't all that high. I think, I think he's, I mean, he's 19 as well. Like, 19 is, like, I don't know, like, I'm 27 now. So I'm, I'm older. And I, when I think about the age difference between 17 and 19, I'm thinking, like, wow, those are two basically the same thing. You know, like, they really are.

Like, that, that, to me is essentially, like, I wouldn't. I feel weird talking to people who are under 23 at this point. You know what I mean? It's like I can't. I'm sorry. I don't really give a shit about that because I even feel like, say, because sometimes people put up a barrier, but like say if people are genuinely friends and friendly,

kind of like how you'd be friends with your cousins and nephews and stuff like that that are younger. There's difference. But what I'm saying is like even just like when I think about the difference between me at 27 and me at like 22, Yeah. That is... No, I totally understand what you're saying. That is way more vast than the difference between me at 17 and 19.

Like, I don't even... I totally understand what you're saying. Yeah. I just feel like when sometimes people... I always feel like sometimes sex is always jammed in, in, like, conversations to the point where it's like, oh, I feel weird talking to this 18-year-old. I'm like, are you trying to fuck them? No? Then why do you feel weird?

If you're just having... If you're talking to somebody, this is just from my perspective. If you generally aren't trying to fuck somebody, like, it's just... just like talking to, like I said, talking to you a nephew or niece, you know, their family. And you can be totally cool with them and you can trust them. Yeah, yeah, but that's kind of the reason that you're talking to them.

You know what I mean? But I feel like it's, but I also feel like it's optics though. You know, it's more of an optics thing than anything. Where I'm saying, if somebody's genuinely like, oh, here's a, here's an 18 year old, like, I know an 18 year old musician. And I'm like, hey, what's up? Do you want to collab? You know, no,

ain't no fucking going on. I don't feel weird about that at all. I just want. I just want, Yeah, no, that's fine. It's weird to talk to people that are younger than you, you know. If an age is an age, you know. And if it's nothing, if it's nothing sexual, if nothing relationship-wise, then you should be fine. You're just, you're just literally conversal- Yeah, no. I mean, that's, I was talking about, like, relationship-wise or, like, sexual-well.

Like, to me, like, at 27, to me, like, 23 is, like... It's pretty young. That's already, kind of, like, at a point where it's, like, what are we going to talk about? Like, what do, like, have you paid taxes yet even? Like, like, I don't know, like, it's, it's just, uh, I agree with that. I told me, I told you, yeah, I'm really sure of why I 100% fill you. Yeah. And the gaps can get, like, really fucking squirly, yeah.

Yeah. And, like, my parents are 10 years apart, you know, like, I, it's, it's a weird. Like, I, I know this isn't, like, a funny conversation. It's interesting, though. But at the same time, at the same time, I just feel like, I don't know, like, I feel like, I don't know, like, there's a huge lack of nuance in conversations about. about this specific thing where it just seems like blanket, you either have like an extreme like sycophant where it's like, oh, Carson hasn't done anything wrong

or this weird kind of like, oh, he's a pedophile. And it's like none of these are accurate. I've seen both videos. I've seen both titles. Carson did nothing wrong and Carson's a pedo. Yeah, there's the same channel. The same channel like less than 24 hours. Carson is a pedophile and then like Carson is innocent.

It's like, yo, what the fuck did you just do, you idiot? It's insane But I just I don't know Like I did want to pump the brakes on the jokes a little bit Just because I think it's like Even just like what you were talking about With like the music industry shit

Like I just I haven't seen that brought up at all Like I was I was the only person who tweeted anything remotely like that You know And it's like It's just an interesting Thing because it speaks to like The difference between you know

What a modern celebrity is what an older celebrity is. It speaks to the differences between YouTube as a medium and the differences between, you know, like, fucking Leonardo DiCaprio had a friend group that he literally called the pussy Pussy Posse. Like, literally.

Actually, it was him, it was him, Toby McGuire, like, something, something Connolly. They were just out getting pussy because they were famous and they could do it. And it's like, of course. I mean, yeah, I mean, why not? Yeah.

Get pussy, you know? Just don't just don't. Just don't, you know. Don't get younger pussy. Don't get underage pussy. Yeah. And also don't lead younger people on through text messages for months and months on end because that's just double creepy.

Yeah. It's not, it's not a good idea. It's not a good idea. Ladies and gentlemen, I think, yeah, especially because of this day and age, the internet, it's weird. It's a fuck. It really is like, it's really weird now. And I definitely agree with the differences between the celebrities.

and also just the type of aura that they put off where people, a lot of people don't even see celebrities as people and I think that kind of becomes like there's a disconnect too where a lot of these internet celebrities or whatever they just seem like regular people. Yeah, they're kind of like famous for being like normal people who just so having to be famous. Yeah, that is another thing too, yeah.

Because like... You're always so disappointed when like... I saw so many people that are disappointed at Carson. Like, I am so disappointed in you. and then Robert Downey Jr. He's done some fucking wild shit. And everyone's like, oh, that's Robert.

That's R.D.J. But, yeah, I feel what you mean. I feel what you mean. It's all the idea of, like, growth, I guess. You know, like, this is a mistake and you have to grow beyond it. And I think people are over, people over, whenever the explosion goes off first,

people are always going to be screaming and yelling not loudest, you know? Yeah. So we'll see what happens afterwards. Yeah, so Carson, hey, man, get your shit right. And, hey, if you want, you man we'll hit the clubs man we'll go hit the clubs 21 and up not your funny up you know yeah

i'll i'll be your wing man dude i'll just i'm kick it i'm i'm a fucking i'll i'll lead you to the fucking to the promise land dude there's plenty there's plenty of adults yeah there's a lot of there's almost there's actually a shocking number of adults yeah so that's that's pretty much it i think i think we've covered it as as far as we need to uh that's really the only thing that's happening right now again we recorded this on the fifth if anything else happens after this and it's totally fucked to pretend we didn't say you imagine yeah they oh no they found he's fucking texting a fetus they found it wow he's texting a seven-year-old that'd be wild i wouldn't even laugh at that i'd be like that's crazy dude don't do i'd message him i even know the guy

i'd be like hey dude seriously calm the fuck down bro you're too deep hey um how did you do that like actually calm down she's seven bro a seven-year-old fetus a seven-year-old fetus No, a seven-year-old person. Christ all my. Seven-year-old feet is. How does that even work? That's a big, that's a big mom. The mom stays in the mom for seven years.

Oh, my God. Anyway, let's move on to, let's move on to some questions from our lovely patrons. Let's do it, baby. Patrons over at patreon.com slash the snark tank. Way to talk over the plug, and I'm not going to do it again. So that's it. Too late.

Go for it. First question. All my hair. First question from a Sweeney mean chin hair. He wrote in. He says, Hello, Mr. Black, Mr. Black, and Mr. Somewhat Black. I don't know if I'm somewhat black.

You're Black by association. You're black by association. You're a Puritan. You're a Puerto Rico from New York City. You're black by association. You can say nigger and people won't get mad at you really. Yeah, say a nigger right now. That's okay.

If you were in the city with me and you said nigger and you said that you were Puerto Rican, no one won't get mad at you. I got to think, listen, man, I got to think about the podcast. I don't care about that word at all. but like I'm just trying to help us I mean Fat Joe right Who exactly

Who's Fat Joe Come on man Shut up shut up You gotta know who Fat Joe is I don't know who Fat Joe is I know who Fat Joe is I know you're related You're not to lose your Puerto Ricking card For real

You got to know who Fat Joe is You have to be related Like such a tiny fucking island You guys are like No I know I hate I can't I couldn't stand Fat Joe for the longest time What he's a fucking monster MC bro Some my niggas don't

I don't listen I don't pull up the pants And I go ahead I just don't like anybody that looks kind of like Pitbull. He's like a fat people. He looks like Pitbull in the slightest degree. He's like three people.

We don't like Pitbull? Huh? You don't like Pitbull? I'm not a fan of Pitbull. I'm not a fan of Mr. Worldwide. He kind of just mull, like, doesn't he just sound like he's sick, though? Pit bull? Pit bull?

Pit bull just sounds like he's sick. Oh no. Hold on, hold on. I can't be part of this conversation. Sweeney, let me explain something to you. Pitbull to me is like, like Medea to you. He's just this kind of caricature that exists and it's just like look at this his look

we've seen he's like uh like if a grocery store in fucking Wyoming like made their own like Spanish seasoning you know and it's like look look it's Spanish even though it's like fucking just you can't just throw I can't just throw up this. Pitbull on a fucking track and just suddenly it's ethnic. I hate that. Like, it's so fucking annoying. I can't, I can't even talk about it. I love Pitbull, dude.

I love, love, love Pitbull. I can't even. That's weird. That's weird. It's weird to have any amount of, it's weird to love Pitbull. Like, I don't mind if you like him. I love Pitbull. It's just weird because you like respect like good hip hop and then you're like, oh, yeah, he used to be a battle rapper.

That's why I love Pitbull. Did he? He used to be a batter rapper. He's not even, yeah, he's good because you can't understand. he's saying so he was like no cap at all not kidding he was a battle rapper fuck that but i like he started making like party rap music he was a battle rapper and then that's what took off and that's what made him his money and i respect that you know do you think go follow your money i guess but before that he was like he was like really in the hood like selling drugs in

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They're right by you. Daddy Inky? Sean Paul. Dude, Sean Paul. See, now, Sean Paul is the shit. Sean Paul. Samaj bit too. It's just so fucking absurd.

I remember when I saw... I remember when I saw fucking Sean Paul for the first time, I... You'd never seen somebody that, just that short-circuited. You saw a white Jamaican person, you freaked out? Yeah, because I'd never seen that before. I guess. What do you mean you guess? You're guessing my experience?

I guess I'm not, I guess I can understand a short-circuiting. Like, I don't know, dude. Like, I grew up in a household where there were people who looked like me, and there were people who looked like fucking, like, J-Lo, like a constant, constantly coming through my home. I understand. I understand that, but that's significantly different

to Sean Paul who sounds like he, he looks nothing like he sounds. Sean Paul doesn't really sound that Jamaican, bro. In the songs he does. He sounds like like I can speak

the same way he tries to speak and the way he tries to speak is so Americans can understand him. I speak Patois as well and they don't really sound like him, you know? I understand. That's why it's confusing.

I was just like, what the fuck of town balls here? First of all, what is this language? Second of all, who is that? What? Why does he look like Elvis Crespo kind of? This is really, it's like really bizarre. I, okay. He's a strange looking dude, man.

He's a black man with like, he's a black man with like, he would like fair skin, like very, very fair skin. Yeah, like me. He's just some, I'm sure he's just like, yeah, ethnically like. Part European. That's it. Yeah, Portuguese or whatever. Portuguese.

They just fucking conquered everything. And then now he's like, when I know, I'm gonna go, yo, chit. So, some of me, though, to our girls, you know, he just, chuh. You know who knows sounds awesome? Tom Hanks' son, Chet. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah.

What an inexplicable person he is. That shit hurt me, bro. That shit hurt me when I was like, you're Tom Hanks' son? I was like, what? I don't think your parents love you, bro. What does he sound like again? Like, I forget. Like, I just remember that I was baffled by it.

Did you see what he was like talking shit about Trump? No, how does he sound? I forget like what... It's just the most generic Jamaican accent. It's just, it's, it's, if they need, it's default. It's not like he has a... Why does Tom Hanks son have a Jamaican accent? He's a rapper.

He's a rapper, Tom Hanks? Yeah, he looks like fucking, uh... Wait, what the fuck? But so... His Jamaican, his patois sounds better than Tom, right? which we call Sean Paul's Lokey. But hold on. But hold on.

But hold on. But hold on. I said, why does he have that accent? And you said, because he's a rapper. That doesn't make sense. I mean, he probably just speaks like that because he probably like, like, look, it's a language. Isn't Sean Paul from like Barbados or something?

He's Jamaican. Sean Paul's a Jamaican man, bro. These are all people, by the way, that I'm sure, like most of the people listening to this probably don't even know. Yes, true. We got to be able to be a bunch of people. No, they know these fucking people.

I guarantee you, well, I'm sure they know Pitbull, but I don't think they know Sean Paul. Sean Paul hasn't done anything. No. Give me the light. Everybody. Sean Paul's very, very famous, but we're also from a different era. We're not from the internet era.

So we like, we watch TV and saw people who are famous on television, opposed to these kids think that famous is like, I don't know, like, we're not, like, we're not, oh, Joe, like that. Jojo Siwa. We're not like, we're not like Sweeney, you know, we're like, he just, he just knows all these fucking random zoomer people. That's very true. I know things like that because I don't know, man.

It's passive knowledge. I don't know how you guys don't hear. things. It literally is passive. I don't watch fucking things. Where do you see it? Where do you see this shit? In passing, in like in talking where? And seeing people talk. In passing where? In passing at malls, in passing with my girlfriend going somewhere. Her cousins might say something, you know? People talk about shit. That's why I get most of my information. You're going to malls in the middle of a pandemic, sweetie. Prior to this, prior to this, you, you, you dick. Anyway, we still haven't started, we still haven't started this man's, this poor man's

question. Oh my God. What is this what is this what does this bitch want? Sweenie mean Sweeney mean chin hair he wrote and he says so if you went to a different universe and fucked the girl version of yourself is that masturbation or is it just sex? I say it's masturbation because it's still you. Why is it incest? I would say it's incest. It would technically be incest, right? Is it okay well you don't exist in that universe? No but you're still related genetically. Well well right because it's you. This this is this. This is a This gets difficult, okay? Because one, first and foremost, you're going to a place where you don't exist, right?

Okay. So it means that technically no one there is your family. Technically. So genetically, that person is the same as you, right? Are they? Or are they, like, how close are they like? I guess they're genetically the same as you, but they're not related to you somehow. That's a paradox.

Exactly. So, um, they're the same text to you. So I would, that would count as masturbation, more or less. It would be incest. Because if it's just you, if you're fucking you, you're not having incest. just getting your dicks off on yourself. But you is another person in this case. So it's more sex than masturbation.

That's true. Would you, so fucking, if you fuck the clone of yourself, what is that? A clone? Yes. That's probably a word that we haven't invented yet. That's true. If it's 100% clone identical, it is kind of masturbation. What is masturbation exactly?

Let me look at what masturbation means exactly. Yeah, look at it's, the dictionary definition of it. So we just so we know. And we're being educational here. That's funny. I don't think that's an educational program. This is now an educational program, guys. I haven't looked at masturbation in years.

I don't think I've ever looked at. I don't think I've ever looked at it up. Of course, for now look up beating off afterwards, too. Okay, masturbation, erotic stimulation experience, especially of one owns genitals, organs, commonly resulting in orgasms, and achieving by manually or other. bodily contact exclusive of sexual intercourse.

So yes, that's masturbation. Exclusive of sexual intercourse, though. That means if sexual intercourse is involved, then it's not masturbation. No, it is. That it says exclusive of. Oh, you mean exclusive of. Okay, gotcha.

Go get some fucking glasses, man. No, I read it. I was just trying to decipher what it meant. So exclusive of means it excludes sexual intercourse. So dang, is that incestral sex thing? It's not, it's not masturbation. It's not any of those then. I guess it's fine.

I'm gonna fuck my female clone. I would do it. I mean, I'd fuck a clone to myself. I'm not a clone. I'm talking more in the premise of the original question, which is like in an alternate, in a different universe where it's just me, but like a female?

I think, yeah. Does the clone look like you? The clone would look like you because it's a clone. Like, it's a pretty female version of you. It's a pretty female version of you. Like, if it's like that, that face app thing. Yeah, put it on the filter. You all pretty and shit.

Then it's like, all right, now we'll talk. Now we'll talk. Yeah. It's not like, I might have to clap those cheeks. It's not just you with a pussy. You know, it's like, it's a proper. I, you know what? I think I can honestly, that this is going to sound hyper sus.

It's going to sound ultra-sus. Oh, man. I think I could be convinced into allowing a clone of myself. suck my dick to suck my dick. I think I can be convinced to allow it. Like I think I think I think like they can convince me to it. This would be so cool. But why?

Come on, man. Like I'm just trying to help you out, bro. You know you probably pent up. But the lady's probably aggravated at you. You know, man. Let me just help you out. And I'll be like, I don't know if I should do it. Like, dude, I'm just you, bro.

It's not weird. It's you on you. And I'd be like. It's the future. I'd be like, yeah, kind of. You know, you know. And then he starts sucking. I'm not going to stop them.

You know. Here's the thing with that That here's the thing with that that I don't think you've thought All the way through. This is a clone of you, correct? Yes. So this is a perfect copy of you And your brain and your mind and everything Because that's what a clone is.

This would mean That you In your heart of hearts Would be willing to convince Yourself to suck your own dick. Yeah. It's that crazy. It's like what? It's just a, It's a, I don't know.

Because a clone is not you. One is made. Oh, man, you see this, these are the weird moments. No, no, no, no, no, no. It is still you. No, it's not. It's, that's what a clone is. A clone is anatomically and physically you, but it's not you anymore.

It's physiologically you as well. Like, your brain is cloned as well. Not mentally anymore. At the moment, at the moment of being cloned, it's not you exactly anymore. You don't share the consciousness, but you don't share consciousness. No, no, yeah. At the moment, like, at the moment that you are cloned and you diverge, you're different, you're you will become different people theoretically not that different really but like still

different enough to be like all right this is a different person but see here's here's the thing that i think you're missing sweening okay when you're masturbating are you turned on by yourself is that what's happening he has to think i have pretty soft hands oh oh wow wow wow wow wow wow wow wow wow that's kind of weird i like that you had to think you think that you can be convinced by because my problem is my clone looks like me and he's like hey bro i mean i mean I mean, it's basically masturbating. And I'm like, the problem is, bro, I don't find you attractive. I don't look at myself and get, and then get like turned on.

I'm ready to go down. Who got hand action like I do, bro? No one you know got hand action like I do. And they're going to be like, uh, you're like, dang. But I'm be like, I have my own hand, though. Exactly, bro. But you ever wanted to beat your dick and play fucking FIFA at the same time? Like, shit.

I have wanted to. my girlfriend would have let me beat me off and let me play fucking destiny at the same time well that's that needs to be fixed dude that's bullshit yeah she needs to she needs to fucking she needs to fix that yeah that's not a problem at all like what like i was gonna do that i'm not why would you not why would you not want that because you know i want it to be i want i want us to have sexual interactivities when we finally do i want them to be you know did you say when we finally do yeah He's waiting until marriage, Derek.

He didn't tell you. You didn't know that. I'm gonna. I think I'm done with this podcast. I think I quit. Yeah, we were both on the same page with that like so, so quickly. Yeah, you didn't know. I'm waiting until I marry my girlfriend so we can finally, you know, consummate our marriage.

If I was in the same vicinity as you, I would hit you so hard over the head right now. So what, bro? I don't care what your fucking beliefs are. Shut the. I respect. I respect that you're, you know, you're soiling your body by having sex before marriage. You should respect the fact that I'm waiting to marriage, you know? You got to be respectful, bud.

Yeah. A piece of shit. It's like all those round earthers with their silly theories about the sun. I've never kissed her either. It's going to be a really, a day of full new discoveries once we finally, you know. So you're going to like fucking nut as soon as you kiss her? I'm very, yeah. You never know.

He's very, he's very, he's very pure. They hold hands and then think real hard and come We lay on a bed together We hold hands and we come That is so sad Which one is it? Is it demolition man that has the sex things That you like

Come like consciously Or am I thinking of the wrong movie I don't know It's one of them It's one of it's on Mars Total Recall Total Recall I think Is it total recall

Am I mixing my movies up Maybe Where there's the the sex connection Yeah. And because that's what I, that's, that's, that's going to be cool. Whenever we're able to actually do that. I don't want to do stuff like that because I don't want there to be a moment where I love a AI thing more than my wife. So I'm, I'd rather fuck my AI thing more than my wife.

I don't want that that's happened. So I'm just going to, I'm going to stay clear of those things. That's smart. That's smart. You're thinking, you're thinking long term. You're thinking, you're thinking smart. I respect. So then you're the biggest bitch on earth. I just wanted to.

I'm not a bitch, bro. I'm just trying to keep, I'm just trying to keep marriage holy, bro. Holy shout. Oh, sure. Okay. Chuckie Merritt. Anyway. You're talking about getting sucked off by your clone and then you're like, oh, I just want a holy marriage. It's not cheating. It's not cheating, Derek, if it's your clone. Exactly. I just don't think God wants you to fucking fuck your clone. Why? Why? If God made clones, he made clones to be able to do whatever I want to do and what them want to do.

So if my clone want to suck my dick, all right, Derek, don't tell me what God wants of my clone. Hey, man. If you want to fuck your clone before you fuck your girlfriend, hey. I'm going to fuck my, man. clone up and down the house because you told me I can't. Just pure defiance. Just like, I don't even want to do this because you're telling me I can't. But get over here. What's the next question?

Yeah, all right. Jesus Christ. All right, all right. Let's see. Let's see. Let's see. Let's see. What do we have here?

Whip me Marasov, Rodin. Oof. Mara is bad. Rodin. I love that we just have this contingent of death. Destiny fans just in our in our so we do bro in our patreon. All right, Wario Judah, limp cookie and metal of color. Oh wow.

Limp cookie. What is that? A limp cookie. Sad. Like limp, like limb biscuit. Oh. Same thing. Right, right, right.

Of course. You sick fuck. If you had infinite money and infinite staff. Right now with Ramtruck's declaration of deals, well qualified current FCA lessees, get a low mileage lease on the. The 2026 RAM 1,500 Big Horn crew cab four by four for $369 a month for 39 months with $4,0,000.99 due at signing. Tax, title, license extra, no security deposit required.

Call 1-877 RAM-RAM-5722 for lease details. Requires dealer contribution and lease through Stalantis Financial. Current vehicle must be registered to consumer at least 30 days prior to lease to qualify. Extra charge for miles over 32,500. Not all customers will qualify. Residency restrictions apply. Take delivery by 331. I've got Dan Morgan here on the pod.

Say hi, Dan. Hey, how's it going today? It's going good, man. Tell us who you are and what you do. I'm Dan Morgan. I'm an attorney and a managing partner at Morgan and Morgan, which is America's largest injury law firm. That's pretty awesome.

I think I saw Billboard of years recently that said 20 billion one. 20 billion is an insane number. Yeah, 20 billion recovered. It's actually, I think, somewhere north, probably closer to 22, 23 after this year. And each year we get bigger and batter and our army grows. So the number will hopefully keep getting bigger and bigger as time goes on. Awesome. So how does someone get in contact with Morgan and Morgan? What would I do

if I got into an accident? Probably the easiest way is dialing pound law. That's pound 529 from your cell phone. We are always open. Our call center is always waiting to take your call. 24-7, 365. Wow. Dan Morgan. From Morgan and Morgan, America's Large Injury Law, from thanks for coming by the show. Thanks for having me. Visit forethepeople.com for an office near you. What project would you use them for? Create the best game ever build spaceships to usher in humanity's galactic dominance. Don't say boring shit like cure cancer or stop climate. I like how he didn't

he didn't say stop climate change. You just said stop climate. Stop climate. But that's obvious the most important thing. This guy just said don't choose the most important things for the planet to save our species. No. Be a dickhead and do some stupid shit. Well you got to be interesting. I would I don't know. I know what Swinney would do. You know what I

know what I would do actually. What would you do? I would try to focus on somehow like helping mental, like trying to fix mental health stuff. Oh my God. Because that'd be, that'd be like useful. So boring shit? So boring shit? That's not boring. Oh, my guy. Okay, you know what I'm going to do?

Shut the fuck up, plumbucker. We know what you would do. I'm going to find some way to transform myself into Keith David. But stay at a perpetually young state where I walk around talking like this. Hey, what's going on? I've finally done it. Where are the clones at? I'm horny.

Imagine, okay, if your clones sound like Keith Dave, you wouldn't let him suck your dick. That's totally different, of course. That's like that's completely different. He's hands. He's handsomely bellowing upon your dick. And he's like just like, oh, well, there goes any chance of him appearing.

Nobody's, nobody show him this clip. He has a good sense of humor. He might still show up. You never know. I'll keep this for the Patreon. This will be. Take this part out.

Take this part out of the regular pocket. Take this. Just bleep out. Keep David. Just put like, uh, part or, or deep cave in

Bill Clinton Bill Clinton Bill Clinton I don't know I would probably try to I would probably try to somehow I don't know

make me a set of munir armor I would I would start doing like cyberpunk shit I would I would like start replacing my limbs with like crazy cool like crazy cool like fake ass fucking cyber limbs

and shit like I'd get me a kick ass bionic arm but I'd want my real hand you know like I don't my what's the point so you want a cyber forearm I want I want this part

to all be fake and powerful but I want my real hand why because I don't I I even you think it's stupid in your brain no no no no no no you want to fill your dick

right does that it I am concerned based on how many robot arms that I've seen they don't look particularly conducive to masturbation?

Well, to that and also just like, I don't know, can you feel with, is it established that you can like feel through like, uh... It depends. It depends on the, like, world because if it's connected to your nerves, then yes, you should be able to feel. There's some sort of center that makes it

come through your nerves you should be able to feel. But ideally, I don't want, you want, you see, you want your fucking stupid ass hands. I want robotic fingers. So when I choke people, I can't tell our heart I'm choking them. I want to really hurt you I want to punch people so hard that I don't know

they die or not Think about it this way Think about it Think about it this way You get it It is the year 20 fucking 90 20 not 2090 2056 or something

Let's say hypothetically we're the same age that we are now Whatever fucking who cares And we get We lose our arms And then we have to get them replaced with like cybernetic arms And we can't feel in it anything through those arms.

You'd be okay with that. Perfect. You'd never feel a titty again. You'd never... Perfect. Perfect. I would just punch the ground as hard as I can and not feel it. And I'm like, this is fucking awesome. And I'd probably go do fucking crazy shit.

But you'd probably just break here. Are they enhanced arms? They are enhanced arms, but like you don't feel... If you can't feel anything through them, then you're not going to know how much is too much. don't you have like centers in your fucking arm to dictate that look I don't know I hooked up your brain look I'm working on the assumption of the crudest possible technology I would slap someone's head off their body I would do some wild shit

because you I do you understand you have you ever have you ever really really punch someone hard Chris like I've punched people in the skull before and that shit hurts after you do it I punched a kids head into a school bus window so imagine not being not being able to have to hold back when you punch someone with robotic arms too. I mean, if you want, I mean, what you could do is hit people with a hammer if that's what you're trying to do. The hands, no, isn't it.

What is, what, I understand that. What is your focus on combat? Because that, what's the point of being a fucking, by hands human if you're not going around beating a life out of other things? You're a weapon now, be a weapon. You're not just going to be fighting for no reason. I'm going to be fighting. I'm gonna be fighting for no reason.

You might not be doing that. The reason that I would want to get like bionic knees and like and bionic arms and shit. And bionic arms and shit is because like this shit is just so faulty as it is. Like it just sucks. I can't lift anything. I can't do anything.

My knees crack every single like moment of every single day. They suck. And the tendons are going to get weaker. It's just downhill. Not to mention there's more of you to possibly get cancer on. Like it's just like it's just like it's. It's just way less, like, it's just way less advantageous to just have, to be just purely biological.

I just, I just, I don't care about all that. I just want to be, I just want to be chrome, that's all. I just want, I just want to be chrome. A whole chrome person? Like Lizzie Whizzy. Like, that shit, that shit would be dope. Everything's chrome. Like the SpongeBob episode?

Yeah, yeah, dude. The future, everything's chrome. I forgot about that fucking episode Oh my God I would love I would love to be made If I'd dude If I could get like

Cybernetic enhancements I would totally take that shit I'd probably fuck up one day And like my arms Rip out of place And I'd be like I've been so much pain My body's doing all this wild shit

But like until that happens I'd love it I'd jump off high places And then not get hurt When I hit the ground And if what if I could store The fucking force That I ever create

From drummel plays in my knees And then I hit people real hard Or like my legs Like I could store The kinetic energy After I hit a ground You're really You really want to hurt people.

You're just, you're thinking in, like, fucking Marvel comics terminology. I'm just destructive, bro. I'm thinking in, like, genuine, like, applicant. Like, they're not going to give your average civilian an arm that can, like, rip a building into. I don't know a building to. I just want to be able to hurt a regular person. You could do that now.

I want to be able to do it and not feel pain after doing it. You feel emotional pain. You probably couldn't feel pain. You probably go crazy. Well, you'd probably just die because you wouldn't, you wouldn't understand. when you were doing damage to yourself. But you're robotic. You're not really doing damage to yourself anymore.

I mean, I guess. If you have like nanotech that acts as like an autoimmune shit and that it thwarts any danger, then there you go. I mean, yeah, because the thing about bionic, the reason doesn't work is because your white blood cells will attack if you put like fucking shit inside your body. Your body's going to attack it and you're going to get sick. You're going to get sick.

Like I want, I want, I want chrome eyes. Like, I want it all chrome. I would definitely get my eyes replace. Absolutely. That's something I desperately need. Oh, yeah. I want to see every color that is.

I want to see everything. I want to be able to have the same visual spectrum as a fucking brine shrimp, whatever those shrimps that I can see fucking 2,000 different color spectrums. I want to be able to see. I want to be overloaded. I want to look outside one day and just like, and fall down. That is such a, that is such a wildly specific animal. I'm glad you brought it.

Is it the pistol shrimp? it's one of those probably because a brine shrimp's fucking one of those things that you just you just put in what do they call them there's another word for them the brine shrimps that they're like

they're like stupid pets for kids and the sea monkeys sea monkeys this is like this is this episode is just us realizing what we're talking about mid sentence what is it called what is it called pistol shrimps

what is it called pistol shrimp what is it called sea monkeys yeah yeah hey I'm not afraid to admit that I probably sound I sound extra retard on this episode

oh no no it's it's it's it's 2021 man it's like we're we're we're still recovering from last year also I can't remember I can't remember what happened yesterday to be completely fucking honest with you

oh I know what happened to me man I fucking well my well no it wasn't even yesterday Jesus Christ Exactly you don't even know Ha ha ha ha

No, dude, I have two I have two broken cars right now, man Yeah, what the fuck's going on? What's going on with that? So my truck engine Finally gave out there's a piece inside of the engine That's not worth fixing It's not works fixing

But I've had it for way longer That I was gonna have it And then I inherited that van That pretty much was a van from Gooket Matt City And the van is more fucked up than Than anybody thought it was And it looks like it's not worth fixing either and so I was going to get it registered in my name

because you know my grandma she passed on and so I got the van but it's just like oh this is great timing because I need to save money to move somewhere and now I don't have a functioning car and I'm like oh now I have to fucking figure out how to sell these things

that are all fucked up because nobody who wants to fucking buy bullshit cars you can sell them for parts I can sell them for parks but that's a little bit harder so hopefully I can't and I'm going to get way less money what sucks dick.

Yeah. And then, so I'm like this, it's a fucking, so now I have to figure out should I try to get a car first or should I try to move first, you know,

just use, you know, it's a fucking mess. 2021 is fucking gay already. I'm just going to say that. It's the mantis shrimp. Oh, mantis shrimp.

You're still on that. It's the mantis shrimp. They have the really, really like wide spectrum of colors. I want to see like them. I want to be able to, I want to find, look at the color pink

and not try to guess if it's white. Oh yeah, because you're colorblind I want to be able to see things correctly I want to not I want to I want something to involve in color come up and people not laugh at me when it's my turn People will be like

Ha ha ha you can't see it You're fucking dumb And I'm like all right That's all you want with your cybernetics Yeah I just want to be fine All right Billy the big ball brawler wrote And he says greeting Greetings

Croach Goblins who are As dysfunctional as they are disfigured My question is rather simple what's your most entertaining I got cock blocked by story Back in high school My then girlfriend and I were getting busy Near a scheduled section of a

Oh, it's a colluded section of a river Just off a local park When a stray turtle interrupted us Needless to say she stopped everything And took the turtle home So yeah I got cock blocked by a turtle That's fucking rough my god What have I been cocked by?

And then she fucked that turtle's fucking That turtle is probably chilling Like oh man I'm having a good time They got fucking robbed You look in her window the next morning and the turtles just like on the pillow like smoking. I'd kill that turtle. I'd put that turtle in the oven.

That's cruel. Get some fucking soup. Get some fucking soup, son. Dude, okay. Okay, this is a little off topic and I'm going to try not to veer too high off of it. We just got to a question. There's a Caribbean thing that people eat turtles. So I remember there was one time I shit you not.

I was at my uncle's house. The fucking most, he looks like a stereotypical Puerto Rican dude. I was at his house and he brought a gigantic turtle inside. And it was big. It was like big. Like almost a size of me at like six. And I was like, Uncle. I was like Uncle Edward, where'd you get a turtle this big from?

And it was like, oh, I got it from down by the harbor. We're going to cut it open and have turtle soup. And I was like, Right now with Ram Trucks Declaration of Deals, well qualified current FCA lessees. Get a low mileage lease on the 26. Ram, 500 Big Horn crew cab, 4 by 4. for $369 a month for 39 months with $4,099 due at signing.

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I've got Dan Morgan here on the pod. Say hi, hi, Dan. Hey, how's it going today? It's going good, man. Tell us who you are and what you do. I'm Dan Morgan. I'm an attorney and a managing partner at Morgan and Morgan, which is America's largest injury law firm. That's pretty awesome. I think I saw Billboard of years recently that said 20 billion one. 20 million is an insane number. Yeah, 20 billion recovered. It's actually, I think, somewhere north, probably closer to 22, 23 after this year. And each year we get bigger and badder and our army grows. So the number will hopefully keep getting bigger and bigger as time goes on.

Awesome. So how does someone get in contact with Morrig? Morgan and Morgan. What would I do if I got into an accident? Probably the easiest way is dialing pound law. That's pound 529 from your cell phone. We are always open. Our call center is always waiting to take your call. 24-7, 365. Wow. Dan Morgan. From Morgan and Morgan, America's Large Injury Law from, thanks for coming by the show. Thanks for having me. Visit furtherpeople.com for an office near you. You gonna eat it? And he was like, yeah. And I was like, can I take it instead of you eating it? And he was like, no. I bought that to eat it. And I was just like, why are you eating turtles? I was so confused that people

ate, I swear to God, man. Turtle soup? Of course it's a thing. That sounds like something really like, all right, look, I'm, that sounds like, you probably heard about it too. I heard about it, but I always just assumed it was like a dream. Exactly. We're savages. We're on an island, bro. We eat everything we can find. Traditional, you need to get the mallet and smash its head open. Then you crack the fucking shell Then you start putting in Chicken noodle soup in it And it's just really

This is crazy that this is really like You're tripping right now right Of course Anyway What were we talking about Fucking cockblock stories Yeah the turtle cock blocking Whoever

Yeah the person I'm so distraught Yeah I won't eat I won't have turtle soup I've never had it I never had shark fin Or anything like that I just feel like it's so fucked up

Yeah It's just so unnecessary We have so many chickens and cows Like why go for turtles We literally start cloning chickens Yeah Because there's too many people That want chicken

At the very least Like you know Like I can understand Venturing into different birds You know Like I can understand Want to be like Oh you know

I wonder what duck is like Or I wonder what fucking I don't know Shit like that Like turkey You know like obviously Turkey duck Fesant shit like that

Yeah Like I Vulture Eagle I'll eat a fucking I'll eat a fucking eagle. I will not eat an eagle. I would eat an eagle.

Absolutely. Yeah, I would eat an eagle. They're too majestic, man. I can't fucking look. But if it's, what if it's, what if it's dead already? Well,

if it's already like, if freshly dead, then might as well. You know, the supports of Eagles taking babies, not even kidding? I don't know what that.

That's cool. That's not cool. It's cool until your child is gone. Your kid is taking. I'm not going to be in an area where an eagle can snatch my child. I'm not a retard. Hold on, hold on, hold on,

Hold on. Have you ever seen... What? Have you ever seen... Have you ever seen... Have you ever seen an eagle just standing? They look horrifying. It is jarring. I never realized how big an eagle was until I saw one just standing on someone's lawn. Just standing.

Just standing. Just standing. Because I remember just... I remember going, like walking down the street. I was like, oh, who's that standing on the road? Who's that, I thought. Who's that? What person...

What person is that? I wonder what their family is like I wonder what their name is I wonder where they live I wonder if they pay taxes here and it flew away I can't even humanity

I gave it humanity before I even came close to it and then it flew away and I shit you not it was one of the most traumatizing experiences that I have ever I have ever fucking remembered because that is a moment where you have to really get your bearings

on what's around you because reality starts shaking you see when you you see something that you just convinced yourself was a man flying to the sky and you're just like, okay. Something's got to give here.

In three and those. But, you know. This person just flew away. At first I thought he became an eagle. You don't know that. Fucking animal horse was popular back in the room. Dude, there's freaking what you call it. The Native Americans, bro.

You heard about that shit. You've heard those stories. Oh, yeah, the skin walkers. Yeah, people fucking animals and shit. But yeah, fucking, I don't know. I don't know if I have many, if any, cock block. by stories. I've been caught by mostly by like children.

What? What? I don't like, I don't like where this is going, bro. Like, let's go do this and I'm like, but I kind of want to stay here with my girlfriend. But let's go.

My girlfriend's like, come on, let's go take him, get some ice cream. And it's like, oh, oh, yeah. That's pretty,

that's pretty awful. Get ice cream. Then you fucking turn in a guile and flash kick that kid, dude. Flash kick that kid twice, bro. Backflip kick,

backflip kick again. Fuck that motherfucker, dude. That's really upsetting. I wish I had stories. I definitely have one that sticks in me. It was the summer of 07. I remember that very well. And this, so I was dating this girl briefly in high school, and then we broke up, and then we reconnected back in 07.

And she was always kind of religious. You know, she was a Syrian Christian family. but not like two you know but then she went to a festival and she saw POD

Pable on death and was super inspired to the point where she didn't want to bang anymore kind of wanted to be like a born-again Christian I was like I cannot believe I got cock blocked by POD like what the fuck is this I was so mad

I was so mad that I'm like because I actually used to like that band a little bit I'm like they have a couple of good hits and then immediately after that I was like, I fucking hate this band. Like, how does that happen? It's just, it's just a show. You saw a show, but then it was so good, I guess.

I don't know what, like, they're just probably saying some nice shit. Like, hey, close your pussy and then like, okay. And that was the downfall of us. Because I wasn't like on that level of, I ain't fucking, I ain't doing that sweeney shit. Bro, it's really fulfilling, man. Shut the fuck up, bitch. You learn to respect your girlfriend for more than just her body. fake you sound like the fakeest bitch ever and like i i can respect that you know you may be afraid

to um embark on that journey to be able to find real true love um i'm gonna get i'm gonna go fucking i'm gonna get a plane ticket of fucking europe right now and slam some push dude you have no idea you you see you are too consumed by the um the addiction the physical addiction addiction addiction of flesh you need to feed your spirit derrick you need to feed your spirit Now I have some chapters from the Bible I can give to you That can really help you out there I'm just saying all I want is like first Corinthians No bitch should talk or something I know bitch should open her mouth when I'm in the middle of speaking Lest they be struck to the floor

Traditional trad tradcon Sweeney is a wild character Tradcon Sweeney I like traditional conservative I like when you get to the fucking good parts where we we know the misogynous parts I dig that Of the Bible? Yeah. Of the Biblico? Those are the only parts that I like.

Like everything else is whack. Like there's the whole, oh, don't beat your slave to death. You can beat them but make sure they don't die. Like, I hate shit like that. That's really in there. What's just, make sure you don't. I don't remember that part. Oh, that is a thing, yeah.

I'm a connoisseur of the Bible. This is what people always say that joke. Like, oh, I was a Christian until I read the Bible. But it's kind of true. When you actually start reading the whole thing, you're like, Oh, this is fucking wild. This is, like, how is any woman Christian that's so fucked up?

I know the Old Testament is particularly horrible for women. Old Testament's particularly bad. It's just as bad in New Testament. That's the thing that's not, no. Oh, no, no, no, trust me. Horrible, Derek. Like, I, trust me.

A woman can't show her hair to anyone except for a husband. Dude, the Old Testament is fucked up for everybody. The New Testament is fucked up for women more it's like it's like on the same level and less fucked up for men that's kind of how it goes yeah it makes progress in every

women still have a raw deal it makes progress in every other avenue except for women women and gay people they're dude they're still no matter what they're still oh yeah for sure all of all of the marginalized groups they're still I mean why do you think the why do you think the country is so fucking divisive

man because the Bible says the hate gays and everybody man it's so easy to just like not care about other people's sex lives. It is easy. I can't believe you got cockplocked by POD. It's, I was genuinely upset at the,

I have no reason to be upset at that band. You know what I mean? Because it's just one of those things where she got inspired to be a better Christian or whatever. But I took it out on POD. I think, I got, I,

I, I should have, I should have pulled out the Bible and started reading some pageant and told her to shut the fuck up and do what I say. Jesus Christ. All right. I mean, because it's in there.

I wish I had a good story. I just, I just don't. Like, every cock block story I have is just generic stuff. Like, oh, you know, my parents just got home or whatever the fuck

or like, some fucking nonsense. I've definitely like, oh, my parents, my mom just died and you're like, oh, whi-want-wank, go take your pants off. Oh, man,

my brother just got shot in the face. He's like, oh, so what? He's dead now. He doesn't need pussy. I'm here. I need pussy. What do you mean?

That's what a non-Christian would do. I wouldn't do that because I'm too busy following the Lord's path. Amen. Amen. Amen. Amen. A woman. Did you see that? Did you see that recently? Like one of the congressional hearings, they like ended it with a woman? No. They did. They did. Yeah.

That's really embarrassing. We won't give you health care, but we'll say a woman. We won't try to stop you from. We'll try to take your right to your body away, but we'll say a woman. I love it. I love how backwards this fucking country is, dude. Anyway, a name that I can't read because I'm pretty sure this is in fucking... Is it Russian?

No, it's like... I don't think it's Chinese. It might be Korean. Whatever this name is... It does it have circles. It has circles. No, no. Okay, it's not Korean, then.

Does it have circles? I don't know. Circles are for sure. It's in the document. It's like the last question. I'm reading it now just because I think it's a good one. But it's in the document. I have no fucking clue how to say this name.

I apologize. But I will do my best. Yo! No, I can't do my best because I don't even know where to begin. Anyway, thank you for your question. I will read it now. Did you all know that there is a fan-made tabletop RPG system

for Halo called Mythic Is that real? I host for a few friends and there are a squad of Helljumpers running missions on Earth to call the flood after a mission after MassG, peace out PS. I love you, P.S. Sweeney,

seriously, please play the Mass Effect Trilogy, you bloody heathen. This is why I wanted to read this because it is 2021. This game came out. Mass Effect 2 came out in fucking 2008. Here we go.

Right now with Ram Trucks declaration of deals, well-qualified current FCA lessees, get a low-mile lease on the 26, RAM-500 Big Horn crew cab, 4x4 for $3.69 a month for 39 months, with $4,0,000.99 due at signing. Tax, title, license extra, no security deposit required. Call 1-877 RAM-572 for lease details. Requires dealer contribution and lease through Stalantis Financial. Current vehicle must be registered to consumer at least 30 days prior to lease to qualify. Extra charge for miles over 32,500.

Not all customers will qualify. Residency restrictions apply. Take delivery by 331. I've got Dan Morgan here on the pod. Say hi, Dan. Hey, how's it going today? It's going good, man. Tell us who you are and what you do. I'm Dan Morgan. I'm an attorney and a managing partner at Morgan and Morgan, which is America's largest injury law firm. That's pretty awesome. I think I saw a billboard of yours recently that said 20 billion one.

20 million is an insane number. Yeah, 20 billion recovered. It's actually, I think, somewhere north, probably closer to 22, 23 after this year. And each year we get bigger and batter and our army grows. So the number will hopefully keep getting bigger and bigger as time goes on. Awesome. So how does someone get in contact with Morgan and Morgan? What would I do if I got into an accident? Probably the easiest way is dialing pound law. That's pound 529 from your cell phone.

We are always open. Our call center is always waiting to take your call. 24-7, 365. Wow. Dan Morgan. From Morgan and Morgan, America's Large Injury Law Firm, thanks for coming by the show. Thanks for having me. Visit forethepeople.com for an office near you.

I'm just saying, man, you gotta fucking get to it. Here we go. Guys, I have so many... Look, guys, I don't even really play video games if I'm not streaming anymore. One. So stream Mass Effect. Yeah.

Two, Massfx probably not give me the numbers I need, bro. I need... I'm trying to get partnered, bro. I need numbers. So you're streaming Smash and Destiny 2? Destiny 2 Smash, Ghost. Why don't you just fucking play Among Us? If you want to fucking lying, bitch. I don't want to play Among Us, man.

I don't want to play that game. Then you don't want to play numbers. Yeah, you just said you wanted numbers Look, look, look, let me explain these of you, okay? Among Us is a really fun game If there is a voice chat Yeah, so fucking go into a voice chat I don't want to do that

I'm just gonna fuck people's day You're not, I'm... You're making excuses, hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on You're making excuses here I won't play Mass Effect because I don't It won't give me the numbers But you won't play games that will give you numbers Destiny 2 I'm sure doesn't give you numbers

It gives me pretty good numbers man I swear to you I guarantee you when people tune into your stream less people watch when there's Destiny 2 on. I disagree. Okay. I'll be keeping a close eye. I have my smash people.

People come up with Smash always. People show up for Destiny. People always show up for just chatting. That's when the most people show up for some reason. Yeah. Well, because they want to hear about, they don't know them. They don't know you.

They just know bits and pieces and they want to get intimate, man. You know what they want to get me with this dick. Kiss the side of my dick. What's that? The side. The side. My thing's a box, so I got sides.

At the very least, dude, it's coming out, like, very soon. I promise you guys, when the collection comes out, I promise, I promise, I promise, there's no reason I should not get that game. Yeah. Yeah. Notice, hold on, notice. Notice what he just said. What do you say? There is no reason why I will not get that game.

I will get that game. The issue is not about whether you'll get it. Oh, my gosh. Because you have it, my guy. Will you play it? it. Those are wise words. I recognize. I recognize that. I already own the games because there's an Xbox in the living room and I can always play it. Guys, I understand. Look, okay, okay. I just haven't gotten to it. There's no reason other than that. There's literally

nothing other than that. I just haven't gotten to it yet. That's the only reason. I don't, I'm sure I wouldn't hate it. I love space. I love fucking the fact you could fuck aliens. You're going to like it. I think Shepard's already cool as shit, you know. Like, I like it. Keith David's in the game. You know, of course I want to play it. Exactly. But, like, just not yet, guys, not yet.

All right. Soon, though, I promise very soon. But not yet. All right, all right, all right, all right. Sweenis swinging as dingus, Rodin. Okay. He says, Dear man who killed Jimmy Hoffa, you and alien hater. Don't know what.

Okay, thanks. I'm alien-handedly. Yeah, you're clearly the alien hater. You, yeah, whatever I don't know Answer this answer Oh, wait a minute What?

Oh, you and alien Hater Answered this question So he's talking about me And Sweeney Okay Answered this question Many moons ago with Minion Lady

Perenthesies Gabby When she was dressed like a fucking minion By accident Oh my God But I don't think we ever got Black Metal's opinion Is it gay to suck your own dick? Really?

Oh, No. I'm surprised we've never talked about this. Yeah, I feel like we must have, right? Maybe we never did. Maybe we never did. I'm sure I've talked about it outside many a times, but I guess not. Yeah, because it's out of technicality, it can't be. Yeah, it literally can't be. It's just, yeah, it's, you're gay if you masturbate. That's it. Yeah, no, exactly. Yeah, this is, this is the conclusion that we, we, we, we reached the last time as well. It just, it can't be, it can't be because it's you. The caveat to that,

that I still maintain is that... Is it gay to be the one sucking? No, no, no, no, no. It's not about any of that because you're doing it to yourself. You have to do it. You have to be the one sucking.

The issue is, sucking a dick is more like sucking a dick than having your dick sucked in that context. Yes. Yeah. That is the only...

That's like a little asterisk next to it, but it's fine. Whatever. Do whatever the fuck you need to do. God Christ. Lord knows I've seen all sorts of horrible shit already.

Yeah. And I would say, The one thing that would, it's because it's like, all right, so when you're regularly jerking off or whatever, you're not finishing in your mouth. So I imagine if you were sucking your own dick, you don't finish in your fucking mouth.

That is fucking wild. Is it really that wild? I've definitely seen porn where girls have squirted in their own mouths. And like they fucking go to the camera, they go to the camera and they show it. And it's like honey bun. Women are different.

Women are different. Women have been. exception. Women have that exception to the point where like I've seen a plethora of women like just going to town on themselves and afterwards they're just fucking treating their fingers like popsicles and it's just like that's pretty normal in the porn world but if a dude does that shit right he just he finishes and then he's like whew it's like it's like it's it's it is deeply deeply uncomfort. comfortable to see.

If you lick your own hand after nutting your hand, bro, you got to talk. You got to talk to me immediately. I don't even like my own stuff touching me, man. That shit annoys me. That's just me, though. Like, I don't give a fuck about, you know, if somebody else is cool with it or not. If I get covered my pants, I have to change my pants immediately. I mean, it's a good idea.

Of course. It's a good idea. Even my underwear. If I'm under, I'm like, ah, man. Yeah, of course. What do you mean? I don't like come anywhere on me, bro Why are you treating that like it's like

Even in this scenario I would do it I thought people did that I don't know, I don't know everybody I don't know everybody's sexual routine Do you think people come in their clothes And just walk around with coming their clothes Yeah, I guess I've uh I've

I knew a guy that did Um Beat off in his pants in school He just couldn't wait to get home And so he So he had He had Just chilling in his pants still

I guess lunchtime I don't fucking know dude But uh it It's it's pretty impressive That's impressive to do Yeah I know people No no no look Okay guys be real be very real

I heard stories of people like Beating off in a fucking bathroom at school Right now with Ram trucks declaration of deals Well qualified current FCA lessees Get a low mileage lease on the 2026 Ram 1500 Big Horn crew cab 4 by 4 for 3 6

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Take delivery by 331. I've got Dan Morgan here on the pod. Say hi, Dan. Hey, how's it going today? It's going good, man. Tell us who you are and what you do. I'm Dan Morgan. I'm an attorney and a managing partner at Morgan and Morgan, which is America's largest injury law firm. That's pretty awesome. I think I saw a billboard of years recently that said 20 billion one.

20 million is an insane number. Yeah, 20 billion recovered. It's actually, I think, somewhere north, probably closer to 22, 23 after this year. And each year we get bigger and batter and our army grows. So the number will hopefully keep getting bigger and bigger as time goes on. Awesome. So how does someone get in contact with Morgan and Morgan? What would I do if I got into an accident? Probably the easiest way is dialing pound law.

That's pound 529 from your cell phone. We are always open. Our call center is always waiting to take your call. 24-7, 365. Wow. Dan Morgan. From Morgan and Morgan, America's Large Injury Law, from thanks for coming by the show.

Thanks for having me. Visit furtherpeople.com for an office near you. Did either of you guys do that shit? It's too dirty. No way. It's too much tension. I'll say this, though. when I went on one U.S.

tour in 2009 and there's nowhere else to beat off so the Walmart bathroom was really the place to do it. You really had no choice. We were either sleeping in a van or we were sleeping in a motel. You didn't have anywhere else to go. Now sometimes there were showers, right?

But the whole thing is you don't want people to beat off from the showers. Derek, if there's anything we learned from the Ramey Spider-Man films, it's that we always have a choice. Exactly, dude. Oh, so you, so you want, see, this is how in cells are created.

They don't relieve themselves and then they kill people. Oh, my God. You need to fucking, you need to relieve yourself to focus and to be clarity. Look, it's, it's, you probably shouldn't just keep it all pent up in there because that leads to like, it leads, it goes from like fine to like, to like confusion to like rage. You can wait. You can wait till you get home, though, surely. Not if you're In my

In my scenario That's what It's not like if it Like I've In my age now Sometimes I'll even forget I'm like oh When's the last time I've done it

It's like It's not like Festering in my mind All the time now But Especially on the tour It was different Because there were like

Say sometimes They're very attractive Women at the shows Or whatever And then sometimes you don't You know You strike it out or nothing happens or whatever and then you fucking

at a certain point what are you going to do? Now, I don't know. Especially if you if you Pray about it. If you if you in that situation when you're in a shitty van with a trailer you know opposed to like having one of those big ass buses in your own bunk then you're probably like fucking you know just going to town and somebody else has to clean up after you return the bus.

You know but. Can you imagine someone's like I got to go into the trailer right now. I got to beat my dick and they go in in this fucking trailer that swaying and fucking hitting all these bumps they're beating their dick all over the instruments and they come out I imagine

I imagine that was the case man I imagine if these bands all I know is that like even when we're talking about groupies in the very beginning just the wild shit that these fucking bands will get up to man I can only imagine

yeah exactly all right uh let's see sloshy scout wrote in says hey Sween team in the Dream Machine I'm not caught up on

I'm not caught up on the podcast but I'm enjoying it so far and I have a two-part question for you and you hopefully have an answered what is your least favorite album or song from your favorite band or artists

and what is your favorite song or album from your least favorite band or artist? This is this is a dangerous so like the worst the worst song from the people that you love and the best song from the people that you hate is something that we could probably simplify it too.

Okay. I have to think. I feel like I have to think about like the worst. My favorite artist. I gotta get him up. Yeah. I got to like, oh man, I'm trying to think of like what's the worst rise against song

that I could think of. And I don't know. I guess I, man, this is rough. I'm really trying to trying to fucking remember I think the Okay go for it Chris I think probably the

Okay so the worst song From my favorite band Probably It's probably I don't know It's probably off of like Their acoustic album

Like I like the acoustic album It's fine But it's just not what I go to that It's not It's not what I go to that band for And I think that That album in general is just kind of like Even for an acoustic album is like

Oh you could have done more with these arrangements, and it could have been a little bit more clever, a little bit more inspired. I think it's Ghost Notes symphonies, and it's like it's okay. But I never listen to those songs, really. There's like a handful that I do,

but most of them are pretty fine. And the best song from people that I don't really have much respect for, I'm not going to say Imagine Dragons, because I genuinely can't think of one. Nickelback has a song called Feed the Machine, that's actually pretty good. It's like this metal thing that sounds actually like

it's got a really genuinely good guitar thing going on. It's got a pretty good melody to it. It's fine. It's better than I expect the Nickelback song to be so I can appreciate it,

I guess, in that respect. There you go. You're not getting... It's really difficult, especially to just break it down into a song. Yeah, or album. Album's fine, too.

That's what I did. Yeah. I know the song and everything for me, for at least my least favorite. Okay, you want to just go first? So for me, my least favorite song by one of my favorites is Kendrake Dumars song Love on Damn. I hate that song. It's stupid. It's stupid.

It ruins. That song single-handedly ruins the flow of that whole album to me, I think, actually. And I know it has another meaning other than what it's saying, but like, fuck, I hate that song. I hate that talk so much. Is it really I've had? It's underwhelming. I don't like it. It's very, I skip it.

It fucks that album. It fucks that album. I definitely skip it. I feel you on that. The album is, the album without that song is an, it's easy and almost a nine out of ten. And with that song,

it's a fucking seven out of ten. It's a fucking dumb ass song. God damn. And then my least, my favorite song for my artist I don't like. I'm trying to think of a song by Juice World that I like. Let me see

I don't know man All that shit sounds the same to me They do they all sound They all sound like they all sound dumb But um I don't even mean that a disrespectful way I mean in a way that like It's all similar

So I don't know how you're going to differentiate that So for me An artist I don't very much So like very much But I like a few of their songs It's Playboy Carty I don't like Playboy Carty all that much But he has a song called Magnolia

and Fetty. Those two songs, I cannot deny, they fucking hit. They hit. They hit pretty fucking hard. Magnolia hits it was one of those popular songs. And in Fettys, it's a song about pure niggadry. And I love it. I love it.

It's just so fucking, it's just ghettoness. And I love that song. All right, I fucks with that. Listen to you're going to be like, whoa. I was trying to think, and the only thing I can really, I mean, if I thought about it longer, I could come with something good. But I think, like, one of my favorite bands that I never, I think because there are too many people's favorite bands, I just don't really think about it. But Metallica is like, I really like Metallica.

And they had their 90s era that was really terrible music. And they have a lot of, it's, that's the whole thing. Like, there's too much shit. But I think everybody knows notoriously St. Anger, that album. is complete trash. First of all, Lars is a fucking terrible drummer, which I'm actually, I think I'm going to make a video

about that on my metal channel, just really talk about how he holds Metallica back, but at the same time, without him, they would have broken up. So it's kind of a weird, you know, Catch-22 thing. And it's just a terrible album because it's nothing like Metallica ever.

No solos, terrible fucking, everything. The production fucking garbage. So you can just pick one from there. Pick one. You're just tearing them down. Holy shit, Derek. It's one of those songs. Like, just pick one of those fucking songs. And, uh, you know, and, and, and just to stay on, just to stay on par with what I was saying, how I kind of resent POD, um, despite, you know, me not liking them. I just, there's something about their song alive that just, it just hits so different to me. There's something about it. It's just

written in a way. Like, the melody is. so good. It's such a feel-good song and such an inspirational song. Yeah. And it just, there's something about it that, like, it hits like nothing else that they have, because I'm kind of like, oh, yeah, you know, this new metal band, this dude kind of wraps a little bit as drags. I get it. I get, I get what he's doing. But there's something about that fucking song that I feel like I want to do some type of training montage to it, or I want to go fucking, I want to run to it or something. It's weird, but, but fuck POD, though, seriously. That, that's, that's, that's, you know, shit really ruined my shit back in the day. That's all I was saying. Yeah, man.

Can you imagine your girlfriend goes and sees this show and she comes back and your girlfriend was like always down to fucking thrashing. And then she's just like, I don't want to have sex anymore at all. You're like, what? Are you serious? Are we like, is it like, are you, are you kidding? It's going to be like a week-long thing. Are you like, you're just done with the whole thing? That is a pretty wild character change in a very short amount of time. Oh, my God. It's so upsetting. It's just like, we've already been fucking, like, this whole born-again, you're like, come on.

Are you, do you think you're tricking? Are you trying to trick God? Is that what you're trying to do? It's not tricking God. You see, Derek, you see you, your, your heart is closed to the view of the later. I can't entertain any more of Christian Sweeney. I can't do it. Next question.

I was a Christian, dude. I know this. Next question. Next question is from Nikki Ziggi. They wrote in. He says, hello boys. Hope you're doing well. I was wondering how you guys feel about the girl proposing to the BF. I know you're all very progressive and don't think it's sacrilegious or anything. But I was wondering if you personally, as men, look forward to popping the big cue. And if you would feel like you missed out if the girl proposed or if you would be like ecstatic or rejoined if the girl took initiative. I was maybe thinking of taking said initiative.

of myself. Oh. I understand that feeling, actually, sir. What the hell? We have women listening? Yeah, I guess so. Look at that. We're broadening our horizons. Thank you, Nicky for the question. I personally understand that feeling very much so. I would like to marry my current girlfriend. Okay. If she proposed to me, it would, I would, I would, I have a whole plan how I want to propose to her. But if she proposed to me, I'd be like, well, I guess it's just less money I got to spend. so fuck it awesome. That's great. That's great.

It's awesome. Yeah, like, I don't know. I'm not really all that. I don't give a shit how it happens. You know, like, as long as it occurs at some point. I think, I, I have never, the issue is that I have, I have never approached anybody. Like, I have never asked anybody out. I've never done, I've never had to take the initiative in that kind of thing, pretty much ever in my life.

So I don't even know if I really know how to do that. Dude, you might not know how to propose. I might, I probably don't. Holy shit, man. I think, I'll be honest, man. I think you should work on that a little bit. What do you mean? I think taking the initiative really shows that you give a fuck.

No, well, I've taken the initiative in like, I should rephrase it. Like, I've been like, hey, I'll come see you first or something. Or like, hey, I'll plan something. I like plan things to do and shit. It's just that it just so happens that the overwhelming majority, and I think probably every single time that I've gone into a relationship, it's never been me saying, hey. Right now with Ram Trucks Declaration of Deals,

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Extra charge for miles over 32,500. Not all customers will qualify. Residency restrictions apply. Take delivery by 331. I've got Dan Morgan here on the pod. Say hi, Dan. Hey, how's it going today? It's going good, man.

Tell us who you are and what you do. I'm Dan Morgan. I'm an attorney and a managing partner at Morgan and Morgan, which is America's largest injury law firm. That's pretty awesome. I think I saw Billboard of years recently that said $20 billion. $20 billion is an insane number. Yeah, $20 billion recovered.

It's actually, I think, somewhere north, probably closer to 22, 23 after this year. And each year we get bigger and badder and our army grows. So the number will hopefully keep getting bigger and bigger as time goes on. Awesome. So how does someone get in contact with Morgan and Morgan? What would I do if I got into an accident? Probably the easiest way is dialing pound law. That's pound 529 from your cell phone.

We are always open. Our call center is always waiting to take your call. 24-7, 365. Wow. Dan Morgan. From Morgan and Morgan, America's Large Injury Law, from, thanks for coming by the show. Thanks for having me. Visit furtherpeople.com for an office near you.

Do you want to be my girlfriend or whatever the fuck? Because I don't know how to say that without sounding like a piece of shit. It just sounds like such a wimpy sentence to say. So I've never, I've just never done it. But I've been fine. No, but you know what I'm saying. It's like it's just... No, I totally...

I actually agree with you with that line. Anytime I've asked out, girls in the past, I've found a different way to say it because that regular want to be my girlfriend sounds very fucking cringe to me too. I always say do you want to be my property. Would you like to now become my property?

I love it. I love it. I'll be... I actually, I think I'm going to be real because the way that I see the type of relationships I like is where I don't I always say this in just short I don't want to date a princess I want to date a queen I want to be I'm a fucking king I want a queen that say if I die or something she's going to be able to hold down the fort too she's not going to be some helpless damsel like I don't know what to do so my whole thing is if my chick is a queen and she's strong if she feels like she wants to take the

the initiative and undercut me and propose, I wouldn't feel offended. Even though, like, I kind of want to, I, you know, I want to do that. I feel like that would be something really cool to do and, you know, plan some shit out and then set up a tripod and probably looks super fucking obvious or something. Or just have some creep that looks like he's jerking off by some trees,

but he's actually taking pictures, you know, it's a homie. Like something, you know what I mean? Like, it would be cool to set something up like that. I've seen a lot of examples. I have a whole thing of how I want to propose to my girlfriend. I have a whole idea how I want to do it. I'm not going to say it because she watches it. She's going to see it.

Exactly. That's why I thought you were about to ruin that shit. But like if it got undercut, like let's say like she reverses the one I have. And she like does something wild. I'll be like, yo, this is fucking amazing. No. No. No, I'm not marrying you.

And then I have a reversal ready for her reversal. And like we're in a car and like diving back. She's like crying. And I'm like, you know what's really funny? Just pull over. Pull over right here. Just pull over. And then it'll be something else that happens.

It'll be like, what the. fuck you outwitted me outwit and I'm like yeah I got you that'd be cool I mean that would be cool if you can actually control hopefully because there might be some irreversible damage that sounds manipulative as hell that sounds like because she outwitted me she reversed it to me first so if I reversed it on her shouldn't be that mad right I I am but she didn't say no that's the thing saying no was like oh man that's different that's maybe maybe later

Oh man, not right now It's a huge gamble, bro That's a huge gamble, but if you can pull it off That's legendary shit I like gambles bro But so what's our consensus Like do we care? Nah, do you think ladies

Don't care But I do have a question for Nikki Or it's something to think about When you listen to this Why are you taking the initiative Is it, do you feel like He's never going to do it Or do you just feel like

It's going Like I say do it if you feel, I'm talking about you know for sure things are going to go smoothly. I would never tell somebody or give somebody the advice of, oh, take a chance not knowing if they're going to say yes or not. I think that's crazy. I feel like you should already know that both of you all want to get married. Yeah. You know what I mean? Yeah, yeah.

So I feel like make sure it's not one of those things because I saw some crazy shit in Target. Now, I'm not saying you're going to do this, Nikki, but I'm saying this girl showed up in a wedding dress. Oh, yeah. You saw that. Yeah, she showed up to Target in a wedding dress to kind of like force her boyfriend to like propose to her on the spot, right? And they had people working and she brought a fucking ordained minister or whatever and just like, hey, let's do it right here right now. And it's like, yo, that's not going to work. That's not the way to do it.

I would be so mad. I'd be like, why would you do this to me? You don't respect me clearly. You don't respect you. You want to make a fool of me, obviously. You think you're better. than me, right? Then fight me. Fight me right now if you think you better than me.

You pull out the fucking Bible right now. Nikki, if you end up doing this, I would love to see how this goes. Absolutely. Like just that just not necessarily film, but just like if you do it sometime and you're still like around, tell us that story. Like I mean like in the comments and shit.

Like it doesn't have to be like a question that you ask on the show. It could just be something interesting. And this is something I definitely want to see of like. like how this how this plays out because it's not something that I've really ever thought about. Like if like, oh, would I really be put off by like if my girlfriend proposed to me? Like, I don't know. I don't think so. Because I want to see this shit.

I really don't. Yeah. I have seeing marriages, truth be told. Like I love, I think getting married is such a beautiful thing genuinely that I would love to see. I just love seeing people like that's one of the few like things that I watch us. wholesome. Like I watch like things about elephants being adorable. I watch people fighting each other to like near death. I watch marriage compilations and I watch like puppies. You watch marriage compilations? I watch proposals yeah because I'm like that's

really awesome. I mean I like interesting when I see interesting proposals I can agree to the clever ones. I don't just watch the cute ones I don't because I like it's it's it's I don't know it's like so you're just longing for that shit. It brings me peace. declaration of deals. Well qualified current FCA lessees. Get a low mileage lease on the 2026. Ram, 1,500, Big Horn crew cab, 4 by 4 for 369 a month for 39 months, with 4,099 due at signing. Tax, title, license extra. No security deposit required. Call 1-877 RAM, 5722 for lease details. Requires dealer contribution and lease through Stalantis Financial. Current vehicle must be registered to consumer at least 30 days prior to lease to qualify. Extra charge for miles over 32,500. Not all

customers will qualify. Residency restrictions apply. Take delivery by 331. I've got Dan Morgan here on the pod. Say hi, Dan. Hey, how's it going today? It's going good, man. Tell us who you are and what you do. I'm Dan Morgan. I'm an attorney and a managing partner at Morgan and Morgan,

which is America's largest injury law firm. That's pretty awesome. I think I saw Billboard of years recently that said $20 billion. $20 billion is an insane number. Yeah, $20 billion recovered. It's actually, I think, somewhere north, probably closer to 22, 23 after this year. And each year we get bigger.

and batter and our army grows. So the number will hopefully keep getting bigger and bigger as time goes on. Awesome. So how does someone get in contact with Morgan and Morgan? What would I do if I got into an accident? Probably the easiest way is dialing pound law. That's pound 529 from your cell phone. We are always open. Our call center is always waiting to take your call. 24-7, 365. Wow. Dan Morgan. From Morgan and Morgan, America's Large Injury Law Firm, thanks for coming by the show. Thanks for having me. Visit furtherpeople.com for an office near you. Okay. All right.

Yeah. And this melstrom of fucking chaos in my mind. Marriage brings me peace. It brings solace to my heart. I would say, I would say go ahead and do it. Like, I don't think there's any, like, real social pressure. Like, I don't know. Like, I think most people now are just, like, whatever.

Unless he's, like, some, like, macho. Tread thought bullshit. Yeah, unless he's, like, some macho person, which I, I don't know. It doesn't sound like he is if you're considering this. I'm emasculated. I had a friend. This dude, he fucked off to France, like, over a decade ago. But he broke up with his girlfriend because he felt emasculated because she was the breadwinner.

He couldn't find a job. He couldn't hold one. I even got him a job. And then he fucking, he's just, you know, it's one of those type of people. And eventually he broke up with her just because he's like, I just feel so emasculated. And all of the homies were like, you're the dumbest piece of shit in the world. That is really pathetic. She had, she was bawling, dude.

And he was being taken care of where it's like. I know you'll find a job eventually, you know, like, I got you. And he's like, no, I just feel like a bitch. And I'm like, you're, you're a bitch for saying. Yeah, no, exactly. That is, that is the, that is what makes you a bitch, I think. Like, if you, like, if you literally can't handle the fact that your girlfriend makes more money than you, like what the, like, what the, like, what the, like, what the, like, what the, like, what the, like, what the, like, what the, like, there's literally holding you down. She's, she's literally doing the thing that everyone looks for is holding you down.

Like, I've been, before, there have been times when I was working at Starbucks, I'd have zero money. And every moment's, and every moment's, and every moment. girlfriend would have to hold me down and like I love her for that like that is uh that is a sign of someone like actually really caring and having enough faith in you to be like yo I got you because I know you can get on your feet and do this and like this person got something that beautiful and was like no I can't do it it's like he's a dickhead bro 100% yeah it was she she yeah she was she really lucked out she did she did I mean she was fucking cool as shit I thought she was really dope and he you know I don't really talk to him anymore so that's why I feel comfortable just like

you know fuck like what the fuck is wrong with you bro some people some people are too far up to on ashes man yeah why wouldn't you like that's it's just like that's that's such a huge that is such a huge weight off of my shoulders you know what I mean because now it's like oh sick now I just have to worry about me you know yeah now it's like okay now I can just like I don't have to worry about like providing or like any of that now I can literally just focus on like okay I just got to that's just like knowing someone has your back like truly yeah genuinely has your best interest at hand to the point like if you don't have you like I got you know don't worry about it that's that makes me so angry dude people it's it's pretty fucked up guys listening to this everybody

listen to this when you have something good I know our brains are stupid and when we have something good we're always thinking like what there's something wrong we find on problems Or we have this stupid urge to go look for other things that could be possibly better. But if you have something good, do not let it pass you by. Because people do that. I've met people that do it way too often. They have these good relationships. And they're like, I'm going to go.

It wasn't working out because of some stupidness. It's like that was you. You made that problem exist. Yeah. I got firsthand experience even on the other side. Or it's like nothing's wrong. everything's chill what's the deal but then some people like

if there's anything any little bit of comfortability and then they just kind of have to sabotage this shit you know what I'm saying and it's unfortunate and it's like hopefully people you know they just grow they learn from that kind of stuff you know like I feel like I'm at an age

where you know moving forward everything should be like I think I'm in the prime position to like secure my property, you know, just have my, have my wife, you know what I mean? Secure my property. Pay down on my loan.

Oh my God. Fuck it. I'm just, but like on the real, like just I feel like say, okay, now moving forward, everything's kind of in line and stuff. And man, I would kill for if I could take a breather and not worry about finances and build up my music and all this shit. Imagine like that piece of. shit. Literally the fear of human beings is not being able to provide for yourself.

And you find your mate that is willing to help you provide for yourself because they know you are capable of getting to the point where you can do it. And this dickhead was like, no, I don't want it. Somebody flog him, bro. Flog this man. I really hope that there's a, he's a fucking under a guillotine because he's somewhere in Paris right now. That's, uh, that's, that is just self-sabotage. Like That is literally just him inventing a problem in his own head. And I've self-sabotaged plenty of relationships over the last however many years I've been dating and seeing people. So I get it in that regard. But in like this specific instance, like holy shit, man.

Yeah, not sure that extent. I don't know how you could possibly look at that. And it's not even like, because the way you're talking makes it sound like it's not even like it wasn't even like a yeah, you know, you had. this but like there's like a massive compatibility issue or like uh you would fight all the time and like there there are definitely like reasons like if you're in a situation where your partner is providing for you why that might not be a great situation right because then you're dependent on somebody who might be kind of terrible but yeah like if that if none of that is a problem and literally it's just like i feel emasculated that's pretty yeah that's it was not a man it wasn't

that they were chilling because to even when he decided it's a move to France, she gave him, like, a grand just to, like, be, you know, like, be, be well. Get, you know, that kind of, yeah, exactly. That is fucking wild, man. She had a very kind heart

and happened to have a good amount of money and was willing to take care of this guy, even after they split up, you know, just to, here's a farewell, take care of yourself, and I'm like, wow, what the fuck is this? I never, let me tell you something. I never got, I never got a grand after a breakup.

You're telling you. I've got a death threats. I've got deaths. I've gotten slaps. I've gotten fucking brothers, fights from brothers. I've gotten fucking, I've gotten everything but that.

Yeah. I've gotten pregnancy scares. I've gotten a whole fucking K. Caboodle. Never got a fucking G-stack in my hand. Yeah. I got mental breakdowns. Yeah.

Panic attacks. Of course, classic. Uh, uh, a destroyed diet. Oh, classic. Classic.

Never, never, never, Never a grand. You know, never a grand. Did you imagine? Destroyed motivations. You break up with somebody.

You get a mutual G-stack. You go to the fucking social security office. Oh, we broke up. Like, all right, cool. Here's your thousand. Here's your thousand. Have a good one. I'm pretty, I'm honestly pretty happy.

I'm not in that game anymore. Because Jesus Christ. What game is stressful life? Just the game of dating in general. Just like going out there and find it. It's the worst, bro. You find you. your person, you stick with that person, but you latch on to him like a leech.

Like a leech, man. Like a leech, bro. So who's, who's, out of us three who's getting married first? Sweeney, probably me. Yeah. Unless something crazy happens. If, yo, look, if, if my relationship fell apart, like, to the point something crazy happened, I, you guys wouldn't see me for a long time.

I would disappear. I would go to Japan. I would finally go to Japan and do my whole weeb samurai shit, and I'd come back. And I'd be like, yeah, I had to leave because I was going to lose my mind here. America reminds you and my girlfriend I feel it I feel it I'm going to Japan this year man I'm going to Japan this year

I'm going to Japan this year I we and Chris have been talking about it for months I uh me me and uh my friend we've had no we have zero excuse we have no excuse other than it's being lazy

and then you know once things shut down we're like okay unacceptable soon as it's available of course a lot of people are going to go but I'm not going to go during the holiday seasons right oh yeah we plan on going to Nintendo World that's the plan for us we're definitely going to Nintendo World

I'm just fucking I just I got to see Osaka castle I of course I gotta hang on Tokyo I gotta go to Okinawa There's a lot there's a few things I gotta do I don't even have anywhere I want to be I just want to have I just want to eat a lot of food over there That's it I just want to get a sword made for me

My friend wants prostitutes That's all I know What's he wants me? That's it I want somebody to make me Once I want to go somewhere And give them the idea of my blade They'll be like Yes I'll get on it right now

And they start forging and I'm like Yes that sword is mine. This is my property. This sword is my son. Slice you with this. My friend wants prostitutes. I have finished your blade. What would you like to name? Are Americans even sought after

over there? Probably not. Right now with Ram trucks declaration of deals, well-qualified current FCA lessees, get a low mileage lease on the 26. Ram,500 Bighorn crew cab, 4x4 for 369 a month, for 39 months, with 4,99 due at signing. Tax, title, license extra, no security deposit required.

Call 1-877 RAM, 5722 for lease details requires dealer contribution and lease through stalantis financial current vehicle must be registered to consumer at least 30 days prior to lease to qualify extra charge for miles over 32,500 not all customers will qualify residency restrictions apply take delivery by 331 i've got dan morgan here on the pod say hi dan hey how's it going today it's going good man tell us who you are and what you do i'm dan morgan i'm an attorney and a managing partner at morgan and morgan which is america's largest injury law firm That's pretty awesome. I think I saw Billboard of years recently that said 20 billion one. 20 billion is an insane number. Yeah, 20 billion recovered.

It's actually, I think, somewhere north, probably closer to 22, 23 after this year. And each year we get bigger and badder and our army grows. So the number will hopefully keep getting bigger and bigger as time goes on. Awesome. So how does someone get in contact with Morgan and Morgan? What would I do if I got into an accident? Probably the easiest way is dialing pound law. That's pound 529.

from your cell phone. We are always open. Our call center is always waiting to take your call. 24-7, 365. Wow. Dan Morgan. From Morgan and Morgan, America's Large Injury Law,

from, thanks for coming by the show. Thanks for having me. Visit for the people.com for an office near you. No, that's why it's, well, it's prostitution. They saw after money. All right, I guess so. I wouldn't want that. They have these.

If I could go to, like, Japan with my girlfriend and we could pick up chicks, that'd be fucking sick. But, like, no one's going to look at us. That should be very easy. I talked to my friend about it And he was giving me some information And I had a stream with this

Japanese dude I forget his name's like Nabido or something Like that yeah Something like that And he uh his channel used to be called Fine Love in Japan And now it's just his name And he has all these facts about that

And then we were talking about that specifically When we started looking up his page And looking at some of the videos And then am I recommended It says the truth about prostitution in Japan And I was like So it's popping over there It's popping, but you know

That was my, honestly that was my dream Like when I was 18 or something And then I kind of like Like doing like hitting the The prostitution Now I just I just want to see this stuff I want to I want to see cherry blossom trees In real life

You know what I mean I want to grab some of those petals and shit Like stuff that like we don't have in America You know I want to go to Japan without my girlfriend actually Without? Yeah, because I'm not going to, I'm not going to be, I want to become a samurai. Like, I don't want to go, like, going to her and my girlfriend is going to, like, is she okay?

Is she going to become a samurai? She's not going to become a samurai. If you're going there to do some weeb shit, I understand. Yeah. Like, I'm going to get there. I'm going to get my own sort. I'm going to get, like, real fucking cool, like. You going to get like a ghee?

I get like a gey and everything like that. It's going to be fucking sick. I'm going to come back. I'm like, yo, guys, I could really kill people now, like, for real. I'm not going to, but, like, I could. How long are you going to stay? How long are you going to stay there for? Oh, for like, like, two, three years?

Two, three years? Yeah. You're fucking. What I'm doing, when I'm doing that, like, that'll be a quick thing. Hey, I just want to say if there's any, if we have any Japanese listeners, like, yo, reach out because, you know, we're going to need some places to stay. We're going to, we're going to need some, you know, blow the hot spots and stuff. I'd appreciate that. Thank you.

Tell me how much it costs to get us a 1095 carbon steel sword. made in Japan, all right? Give me the amount, give me the ratio between American dollars to, you know, yen. Just the nerdiest shit. Because I need one made for me, and I also need to find a place

where they would be willing to teach a black person because you know how ages are with black people. So I need, I need the idea. It would probably be better to go to a dojo in America. Get the sword there, but get a dojo in America, probably. Yeah, yeah. Anyway, that's a good idea.

That is, that's about it. We're at two hours. Let me know, though, guys, my Japanese, our Japanese fathers, let me know. Shut the fuck up

with your Japan shit. I'm just trying to figure out, you know? No, no one's, you're not gonna get a... Yo! What is that stock sound effect

that's in all the Naruto games? That's it. That was it. I first heard that in Tenchi, Muyo. That shit is old as, I don't know what it is. I heard that's at my showdown.

I'm so curious where that sound originates. I was literally thinking about that because Soldier Boy, you know, the movie Soldiers came out, and then so people were making the whole Soldier Boy. Oh, yeah, yeah. Because the soldiers came out, so they made a Soldier Boy. So because of that, I got recommended

that Japanese sound, but then it's Soldier Boy going, you! And I was like, that's brilliant. I really love that. That's brilliant. It's brilliant. It's brilliant. That's brilliant.

I've never seen anything better than that. Derek looks at the sudden involving Soldier Boy and the words that leave his mouth That's brilliant. I love you, dude. Never change. Never change, right. Never let them change. That'll be the end of this episode of the Snark Tank. Thank you for, thank you for tuning in. Thank you for your support. Remember, if you liked what you heard today, consider supporting us over at patreon.com slash a snark tank. Like us on iTunes, comment, review us on iTunes.

That really does help a lot with the algorithm and all that shit. We're on Spotify as well. And on YouTube for the video podcast, which I don't think we really, I don't think I ever really said explicitly. I think I mentioned we were going to do video podcast but then like I just never really mentioned it but there's a whole video version that is available on YouTube. We post every

Tuesday early and every Friday on free feeds so tune in for that and yeah that'll be it. One dollar month gets you early access. $5 gets you a question read on the show. $10 gets you access to our Discord and 25 gets your name dyslexically read at the end of the show, which I will now do. Three, two, one.

Hey boss, can you follow me on Twitter, please? Ryan Luchessey, slobby, nabi, hadi, toddy hubby, sloshy scout at Trasone, a supermeca Keith DeVito. Every time Chris says crazy, please check out my podcast called How Did We Even Get Here Every Thursday. that name that I couldn't pronounce earlier in the questions because it's in an alphabet that I've never seen before, I apologize. I seriously don't even...

You know what, let me... Is there a way to, like, run this through... It almost looks tie to me. Yeah, is there a way to maybe put this through a transcript? Yeah, yeah, if you put in Google, it'll bring up something. Yeah, translate. Nezuko Camado. So that looks...

That's definitely Japanese. Japanese, yeah. Well, thank you. You see, it hits close to home. We'll find our person. Thank you, Nizzer. Finally. Yeah, please help us when we go to Japan.

Please. Master Chief Hard is a rock. Armour-locked cock. Matthew Barrett Clark. I love you, Chris Raygon. Oh, thank you. Hard hat skydiver. Chris has a high voice for a lesbian,

absolute wagon, the army of 101 banana shoving themselves down Chris's throat. All knew, all different. Paul Joseph Watson, after he learned the Hulk clap. Monkey Monk, Billy the Big Ball brawler,

Alaska O'Ofield Trash. Chris would be a twink if he gave into his urges. Lou 10 Net Lipton. Not an FBI agent. Juan Punchman. Marcus Shorten. Mr. Fukuci. Papa Nurgle.

Ben Shapiro's sleep paralysis P.Word. Danny DeVito's perfectly preserved penis. I require Chris Piss. Murder ascended. David Connolly, the dyslexic that feels Chris's pain. Dunderhead Space Movie 1992. Lobotomized Jesus is my drooling divine savior. Haco.

Three foot 3.37 inch long fetus. Moto zealot, a Russian name that I can't pronounce, but you know what? I'm going to go ahead and run that through a translator as well. Svetlana Bon Yitzhsev. Bon Yitzis. Transcision. Did you ever listen? Did you ever listen? Did you love it? What would you rate it?

Oh, his name is I came to feast on your ass. Nice. Hell yeah. Nice. Thank you. Thank you for that's a fucking awesome. Horosurus, Horosum is spicy mushroom,

slippery Steve, the stinky, sticky silicone sex toy, Cyber Monday blowout sale, a level one cleric, Derek's unyielding sex drive, dummy thick Dave, big dude 0444, heartless wretch,

aka the black man from Staten Island, Uncle Tony's Pizzeria and abortion clinic, where today's loss is tomorrow's sauce. Oh my God. Yummy, yummy, yummy, come inside my tummy. The ghost that lived in the apartment

above Kristen Sweeney, jolly old dipshit, hugger Derek. movie theater assistant manager, Carson Jones, Ethereum, the ghost of the weekly Reagan recap, the Progerian hunter, deflated left ass cheek, all hands on dick, Anani's Moose, Ario, or Aero, Sunny Chance,

Melfis 1, El Culebron, Richter 86, and rounding it all off as every episode. Well, the king of haphazard. Thank you all. Like fine wine, king of haphazard, guys. Thank you, ladies and gentlemen, for the tuning in to the first Snart Tank of 2021.

Yeah, hopefully, hopefully no more news comes out about Call Me Carson that makes this episode really awkward in retrospect. Let's all just hope for that. You can only pray, you know. Anyway, yeah, thank you guys. We'll see you next week.

And also, there are going to be solo episodes of the podcast coming out really, really soon. So keep an eye out about that. I just recorded mine earlier. If you guys don't want mine, I would go first. You can go first. I recorded mine already, but you can record yours. And then, yeah, I'll send you a list of questions for you.

I'll send you each a list of questions, like, of, I've figured out which ones are going to do. No, no, no, well, they're directed towards us specifically. Oh, I got you. Okay, cool, cool. I'll organize them, and I'll send them out. And, uh, what's your campus? So, yeah. Thank you.

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