The Snark Tank - #61: Lola Bunny Ruined!

Episode Date: March 12, 2021

Lola Bunny is NO LONGER HOT! Mr Potato Head loses his gender! Dr. Seuss arrested for manslaughter and racism! Why do people give their dogs long names, meeting fans in public, Chris's awkward New Rockstars encounter, and more! Is Eminem autistic? Find out today on an episode of this show! The answer is yes, by the way. The question about Eminem, without a doubt. Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

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Hey, everybody. Welcome to another episode of the Snarktank podcast. Last week's episode got fucked up because I'm retarded. I'm an absolute fool. I'm an absolute fool. I just totally fucked it up. So that's annoying. This is, we, we, because we worked, and there's actually, like, I think that was actually a really good episode. It was great.

You guys, I thought it was great. I was, like, I was, like, hey, I think I'm actually going to listen to a couple of the things back. You guys will never see it. I think, I think what I'm going to do, though, is I might just, like, edit it together, the parts that make sense. You know, because my audio just got completely fucked. So I think what I might do is, I might edit together some of like the better conversations where it's just you and,

uh, Sweeney and Derek talking. Gotcha. Might turn that into like a pseudo kind of Frankenstein dark tank that'll go up on like, maybe the, maybe, maybe the Patreon. Some people said they would just listen to it regardless.

Dude, it was so bad. It was so bad that it just sounded like Chris recorded with a fucking Nokia fucking phone. One of the early like fucking like blue and silver flat, like look like a house phone cell phone. everybody says that everybody's like oh we don't care we'll wide we'll listen to it it's like i promise you the the snippet of audio that i that i let you guys here of the fucked audio was literally the only part of it that you could even tell what it was supposed to be

like that was a bad clip that clip was bad in its own dude the the i know and that was the best segment so like the rest of it was just it sounded like like bb8 or like some kind of some robot trying to talk through like a fan and like cutting in and out it was just it was really bad so eventually eventually that episode will like find some snippets of that episode will find

its way back onto the you know into the ether but for now apologies ather but we've got some we got some stuff to talk about we've got a lot of we got a lot of cartoon characters and a lot of fictionalized characters

getting recond reworked I saw a lot of Lola Bunny stuff Oh man On my timeline and I put my phone away for like 63 hours Because I couldn't handle it The furries came that they came to bat They pulled up bro

They fell from the sky man Like like fucking Like meteorites to the fucking dinosaurs bro They came to brawl You know it's wild though I don't think so I don't think the furries I think the furies would fuck Lola regardless. They would fuck her regardless, but they want to fuck the pinnacle her, not the fucking...

So here's the weird thing. Somebody asked me, I did an Instagram Q&A, and somebody asked me, did you see the rework of Lola Bunny? And I thought I didn't. But it turns out I did. But that's how subtle the differences were. When I saw the new one versus the... I was just like, oh, it's not like Lola had like, because the deviant art shit.

She was never that. She was never like her... She looks pretty different. Like, look, I... She doesn't look that. It's not like drastic to the point like she's unrecognizable. She looked like a nice drawing of a character. And now it's a kind of busted version of a character.

That's it. Like, she just looks like she's been aware. She's like she's gone through wear and tear. She had a kid or two. You know, like her body ain't what it used to be. She's like, damn. They just made her a little less sexual. Right?

Yeah. I'll be real, guys. I just, I thought it was weird. that she was drawn that way in the first place. Absolutely. Now hold on, hold on. Not that I'm like against it. Not that I had like a problem with it.

I wasn't like angry or like frothing at the mouth when I saw like this like oddly hot rabbit in this like movie with Michael. Michael Jordan. Michael Douglas. Greed is good. No, like. I just imagine him fucking crossing. people and shit. Fucking ducking.

Greed is good. No, like, I don't know. Like, it's one of those things where, like, I understand the sentiment of, like, being weirded out that... Because there is, there are, like, weird... Like, Miss Bellum was, like, taken out of, like, the Power Pop Girls reboot, and, like...

I think there was, like, a female teacher on that show that, like, she was drawn, like, in the new show, like, without her boobs, even though, like, nobody even really noticed her boobs in the first place. It was just sort of, like... The triangles, right? Character design. Bellum, though, was fucking...

Yeah. Miss Bellum was fucking, she was nice. Like, I was hoping the mayor was hitting that shit. He definitely was. Yeah. The only way Ms. Bellum was sticking around because the mayor had good dick. He must have been giving out some good dick because that guy was fucking incompetent. She deserved so much better.

Fucking her with that little hat that hovered on his head and shit. Wait, boy. Dude, the mayor's dick was longer than his legs. The mayor dick was longer than him, bro. It was bigger than his fucking nose. It was a pocket universe, bro. He had to hide it. He had to have it pressing down, dude.

Like that shit was twice the size of him. He tucked it in between his legs up back into his hat. That's why you never see the back of him, bro. You only see the front of him. That's heinous. No, like, I don't know. Like, I understand, like, there's, I get. So here's the thing.

I don't care about this. I don't care about it at all. But at the same time, I do kind of understand the general kind of, feeling of like, it's weird that we're being very kind of like, I don't know if like, I don't know if prudish or Puritan-e is the right, like, I don't know if there's really a word for this, but it is, it is weird that there is kind of like this weird, um, feeling of like being too afraid to draw just the generalized female form as it is.

That is kind of weird to me. but Lola was like unnecessarily hot In that space jam movie Because the The Like the cartoons

Like The uh What do you call it? It's specifically for children Right Yeah yeah The space jam And all that stuff

So in that particular scenario It's not designed for teenagers If it was like a teenage thing I wouldn't I would be like that's completely par for the course. Having a sexy figure, whatever, or some shit, because it'll get the teenagers kind of like awakened or some shit.

But that was literally designed for kids. It was her and in Rouge the bat. There were the two that was like really uncomfortable with. Because Rouge straight up had cleavage. And I was just like, what the fuck? This bat is strange. I don't like this bat. Ruge was also this round-headed dwarf bat.

I don't... She was very over-sexual. I didn't find her hot. I never said those words. I was like, why does this bat have breasts? I was wondering the whole time, I was like, uh, what's, what's up with that? Did you see, did you see the anatomically,

I was said animatronically? The anatomically correct Lola Bunny with like the eight, the eight racks? Oh, yes. Yes, of course. Disgusting. I was like, come on, guys. Stop.

The most disgusting thing. You can't look at it because you're recording the screen. No, not in the same screen. I was trying to find like, yeah, don't fuck it up. I was trying to find the worst, like, drawing. But I found something that, instead of being the worst, it was probably just the weirdest of showing Lola tickling Elmer Fudd while he's tied up. I saw that, yeah.

I shared that because it was the strangest. I was like, this is so fucking weird, but there was a specific artist that was going to town. Of course it is. Oh, my Lord. I got to go to sleep. Did y'all see fucking Meat Canyon's depiction of Lola Bunny? Fucking. I saw it.

I saw it. I saw it on my feed, but I had to like drive. So like I didn't spend time like observing it because I know there's shit in that drawing that I miss. But like holy shit. Disgusting. It's fucking. It's pretty bad. It's worse than a body.

Amaze me how much he could take a character that I thought I knew what they looked like and show me something of them that I can't recognize. The one he recently made with the Peppa Pig one, I made my girlfriend watch that and she texted me at like, I'm like, I can't sleep. That shit's so fucked. Yeah. It's so fucking horrible. I didn't like that one.

It was really, it was good, but like it did disturb me. I'm not going to lie. I like that one only because the fact that she has a mouth on the side of her face. On two sides. I love that visual, that visual gag. It's so good because they're drawn that way. Yeah.

And it's disgusting. But, yeah, there's some other, there's some other, what else is, there's like other characters getting like fuck or like something like Tadel man, right? Potato Man, Los Pappas. Mr. Patero, yeah, that's another one that I didn't really understand and reading into it. It was another thing where you just kind of shrugged your shoulders because number one, when could you say is the last time you've ever had a thought about Mr. Potato Head? Exactly. Yeah, outside of Toy Story, he never comes up. Like, I doubt, like, there's no fucking 10-year-old who's like, oh, no, mom, I don't want a PS5. Just get me a fucking Mr. Potato Head.

Like, that child doesn't exist anymore. That is an extinct child. That child is dead in the ground, dig him up and use him for oil because he's not around anymore. That child is our parents. Yeah, exactly. Yeah. Like, I don't even think I, I don't even think pre-internet me wanted a fucking, fucking Mr. Potato Head. I wanted a buzz lighter.

I didn't even want him when Toy Story exploded. I had one. Don't give me wrong. I had a Mr. Potato Head. I just had a Woody. I don't know how I got it, but I know I'd always put his fucking eyes on its feet.

I always did that. And my guy would be like, why are you doing now? I'd be like, this is funny to me. This is funny. I like that he sees through his feet. Immediately put you on fucking riddler. I don't know.

Like, what was the whole thing with that? Like, the name of the company changed, right? Instead of, like, Mr. Potato Head and instead of Mr. Potato Head, it was just potato head. Potato Head. I think that's it. I think that's genuinely it. That's not a big deal. Yeah.

It didn't strike me as, because, first of all, it's probably the only time that company is going to get press. Ever again. Like, like, ever again. And also, just, like, it seems to me, like, if I was managing the company, I feel like... That wouldn't even be a move that I would think was particularly stupid. Like, even just completely removing myself from any kind of woke thought or, like, any kind of like, oh, over sensitivity, like any of that. I'm just thinking like, oh, right, what do we sell? We sell Mr. Potato Head.

We sell Mrs. Potato Head. We sell these figures. Now, let's, a rebrand to Potato Head seems more accurate to what we make because it would take the baseline of what we make and kind of encompass everything. Like that to me is what it sounds like And even that's not particularly all that interesting That sounds stable It sounds very fine It's just boring

It's very boring This company's gonna go bankrupt In the next like 10 minutes Probably So like the fact that It was their last hurrah Their last hurrah was just going out His potato head

Benchup in 10 minutes Jesus fucking Christ You change the issue Can you imagine that happens I'm sorry I mean they got No look they probably got some fucking support Like this was, this was probably great shit for them

In the sense that you all remember when Chick-fil-A The CEO Chick-fil-A was like, oh, you know, gays, I don't know, I'm not really down for that shit. And then all these fucking Christians and shit came out And started eating all their sandwiches Because I'm telling you, I never gave a fuck about Chick-fil-A I was like, whatever, dude, it's just white people's sandwich. I don't care.

And then the lines were so big that I'm like, all right, I'll try it. And I was like, you know what? There's spicy chicken. sandwich is actually not that bad. It's pretty good. It's pretty good. So, but the thing is, like, that's some crazy shit, man. You can, you can, if you are a piece of shit, you can find a lot of support. Because there's a lot of pieces of shit out there. So you guys all unify. You guys mix together your fucking, fucking energy. The one piece of shit goes up, it's like, show you energy with me and all pieces of shit with their hands up. And they're like, yeah,

fuck, fuck people of color or fuck gay people. It's like Oh my god, what is it? It's like when the president of goya was like, I like Donald Trump and then all these like Republicans who have never seen a goya bean in their fucking lives started like started buying all these like goya products And they're like, I love this adabo

Whatever this stuff is And it's like you fucking shut the fuck up Like the I will say this note Addebo is really good seasoning There is a really good seasoning There is a is we've been on the internet for long enough to see a lot of terms get watered down to the point where they become meaningless. We've seen, like, even like I remember like Nazi, I remember when like sexist was starting to become like literally anything that was even remotely controversial.

I remember when like racist and Nazi were the same thing. Kami was like next to later on down the line. Everything's communist all of a sudden. And now, interestingly enough, I don't know. if I thought that we would get here, but I think we've reached this point at this point where cancel culture doesn't mean anything anymore. Oh yeah, absolutely. Absolutely. Like, it means jack shit. Like, there were points where, like, I could look at somebody and being like that, and have seen their situation and been like, that's fucked up. That's really stupid.

Yeah. Like, why did that happen to this person for such a stupid reason? And now it's like, Mr. Pertade Head is being canceled. What are you fucking talking about? Dr. Seuss for his books that nobody remembers. Like, dude, the books that, like, the books that people had a problem with that were from Dr. Seuss were books that I, I have never heard of my fucking life. No, none of them.

But that book, the one that I saw the picture of, that panel of, I was like, I was laughing my ass off. They were rightfully fucking. He was offering. He offered, I think it was like, do you want to buy, I think a bird, a bile hay, and then do you want to get a black person

with your bile hay? And I was just like, whoa. Right now with Ram trucks declaration of deals well qualified current FCA lessees get a low mileage lease on the 2026 RAM 1500 Big Horn crew cab 4 by 4 for 369 a month for 39 months with 4,099 due at signing tax title license extra no security deposit required call 1 877 ram 5722 for lease details requires dealer contribution and lease through stalantis financial current vehicle must be registered to consumer at least 30 days prior to lease to qualify extra charge for miles over 32,500 not all customers will qualify residency restrictions apply take delivery by 331. Crack the code to unlock the $275,000 at Muckleshoot Casino Resort, and you can take home up to $25,000.

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You gotta feed it, eat the hay? It's not, it's not like the cat in the hat and fucking green eggs and ham are going to be like unbiable. And you know what, if that happens, if it gets to a point where it's like your kids can't read green eggs and ham because the author wrote something else that was fucked, that's stupid, right? And I would agree that that's like lame and that's like, I don't know. I wouldn't, if I was running a library, not that I would. I don't think I would bother with that kind of thing But as it stands right now I don't know the stuff that I saw in those Dr. Seuss books

The specifically the ones that are being pulled I totally understand why a company Would not push those forward Would want to Would want to not push it forward And people were like oh well why don't you just Because people were comparing it to the way Warner Brothers Does their stuff where like

If they have like a cartoon You know From a long time ago They have that thing in the front that says like, oh, this, the cartoons that you're about to see are from a different time and may contain images that are offensive or whatever the fuck. And I think people were like, oh, why don't you put that on in those? And it's like, it's a book?

Yeah. What do you mean? Like, you can't just... You can put a sticker on it. No, but like, why? People are pushing... The effort that that would take is so significant compared to just, like, adding, like, a slide in a video editor that just universally gets applied to all.

all these things that can be like checkmarked with the UI. You could, you could just put a sticker on it. That's very true. You can make stickers, put stickers on it. It would like, hey, this may contain offensive images, stuff like that. But at the same time, it's just like, yo, dude, like, look, I read green eggs. Unfortunately, Dr. Zeus may have agreed with those particular views. And that really sucks, you know.

No, but he didn't, though. That's the thing. It's like, he even, like, I think there's even like a story from the family that was like, yeah, he, like, he believed certain things early on. And then he, like, he wrote, I think some of the, some of the more popular books that he wrote were, like, books specifically refuting the things that he had written about. Like, apparently, like, according to his family, like, he had become better over time. And he was like, oh, yeah, he was, like, apologetic about the shit that he used to write, which to me is, like, totally awesome. If you're going to have, especially, like, back then when you, you, you know, when you have very, like, because, because there is this thing.

I don't know if this is going to sound weird But like I think like being racist in like 1910 or whatever the I don't even know when the fuck Dr. Seuss lived I don't give a shit to be quite honest But like being racist in 1910 and 2010 are two vastly different things I think I think like I think there's far less leeway in 2010 Where you have access to the internet

And just the generalized summation of human knowledge It's not right It's not right No, it's not right in any way, but like ignorance in 1910 is far harder to claw your way out of than it is now, I think, personally. Like maybe I'm wrong and maybe that's my own perception. No, you're not wrong. It's one of those things that it's kind of like savagery and barbarism and a lot of stuff that happened back in the day. There is no excuse for it, but you can have an understanding of why it happened.

And it's the same thing with fucking racism and how so much horrible shit happened. You can understand it. And a lot of people think understanding is an endorsement. I'm like, no, I can understand why somebody got their head blown off. It doesn't mean that I liked it. It's just like you just understanding something. Yeah, I'm like, I just understood why something happened. And so racism back in the day where a bunch of people were completely stupid and didn't know any better.

And they didn't interact with people in different cultures and stuff. And they just had the worst assumptions about everybody. Yeah. And they were raised in the same town their entire fucking lives. where they were just surrounded by like their grandparents who grew up in the fucking early 1800s and shit like that where it's like You know terrifying to think

Oh man that makes me sick There's gonna be a period of time where my kids are gonna be like You know great granddad was born before the 2000s And I'm gonna be like what the fuck I don't want to be alive anymore I don't want to live to be so old I don't recognize the planet Like I don't want to go in my house one day

And come back out when the world is just different to my brain. I remember it's so fucking insane. It's like whenever you like, I hate being reminded of how old I am. Not necessarily because I think I'm too old, but because I think like time is like scary. And like,

it's like when you go on like a Tinder, like Tinder or like a dating app and it's like people, people are like, oh yeah, I was born in like 2000 and there's an end after that. It's like, what the fuck? What the fuck do you mean?

You were born in 2000 end something And you're on a dating site You should probably You gotta be you gotta be clear You gotta be like 2000 And hopefully before two Hopefully one That's so weird in it though

That's so fucking weird That's plausible It's so gross It scares me Like that that's even plausible Like 2000 was I don't know I have some memories

I feel like an ancient person I have some memories Of 1999 still That's crazy I have a lot of memories I have a lot of memories of 97 I have a lot of memories

of 99 99 I have the most memories. 99 I have some memories. I don't have a lot of it. I remember being like in kindergarten. I remember crying on my first day. I remember some kid getting punched in the face by a third grader. And I was like, whoa, that's really unfortunate for this kid in the same grade as me getting beat up by a third grader.

I remember watching, I remember watching the premiere of that family guy episode, the Y2K episode. Did that come out on until on Y2K? I think it either came out, well, obviously probably not on, but like either a couple days before or a couple days after. but I remember that very, very vividly and I remember feeling so cool because I was like, ooh, I get to watch the adult show. It's like, oh, yeah,

I'm not supposed to watch family guy, but I am. And like, I don't know. I don't know how we got here, but... My fucking memories of the past is crazy. I got some years on you guys, man, so that shit's like... I remember that 90s vividly

and everything. I don't remember shit about it. I don't remember... All I remember about the 90s was that a lot of people were talking about KERS, one where I lived. I heard Naz

pretty often. Buster Rhymes listed album. I heard Descentine's Child a lot. Yeah, Destiny Child was around too. And stuff, stuff like Destiny's Child that I couldn't pinpoint now. Like jagged Edges around. I remember Jagged Edge being a thing. Fucking Jagged Edge.

Is it, is it Y2K? No, no, Wachiket. It's like, is it, what's the other black group? No, that's, you're talking about, you're talking about B2K, right? B2K. Yeah. That shit was like way before my time, way after my time where I'm like, what the fuck is this negroid boy?

band. That's what it was. You don't got to say that, but yeah, I guess. Well, because it was like, it was so, it was, it was a very big departure from like, your typical, like, R&B groups. Yeah. Well, they're much more into, like, what the, the dudes in Florida were doing, all the, all the, all the, uh, back street and all that shit. It was more leaning towards that way than, than R&B. And I was like, I hate this. I hate it. I hate it completely. It's so weird. It's so weird how much, like, it's so weird how the music I heard in the 90s, like, like, exclusively prior to me like playing Tony Hawk and bullshit like that in the black community is so

different from what it like was played on like national radio and shit because then like I tell national radio I'm hearing like rage not rage against the machine particularly but like slip knot and like fucking green day and shit and like Nirvana and I'm like oh wow this is what's played on the radio but I've never heard these songs in my house once I hear suavemente and fucking what you call it a bunch of songs. songs by Selyer Cruz and then like Y2K Jagged Edge and stuff and in DMX. I'm hearing really different music.

Yeah. I didn't even get that privilege of hearing that kind of music on the radio. I heard like, I either heard like Fox News Radio or like, or like, oh my God, what the hell was it? Or like Radio Disney. That was all I heard for like the longest time. the point where, like, I made it to, like, early high school thinking, like, I don't think

I like music. Like, I just didn't like it. I was convinced that it was like, this is an entire medium that, like, I don't like. It's insane how other friends, other friends of ours believe that shit, too. And that blows my mind how people ever, like, I don't like music. It blows my mind, but I can imagine hearing fucking Fox. They almost trad con to you, bro. You almost got tradcon, bro.

It's so weird, dude. You're all fucking crying over Rush. Limbaugh and shit. You're like, fuck, man. Rush! Rush! My boy. Fucking... Someone play Tom Sawyer quit. No, fucking...

No, yeah. For real, though, like, for a long time. For a long time. Like, I was just like, I don't get it. Like, I don't get what's... Like, because all I heard was like... It was like Mark Levine on Fox News screaming about something that didn't make any sense. Or I was driving with my mom.

And my mom was playing, like, story of a girl by 9. days. And that was like... Jesus. Or like Enya. You know? Stuff like that. And I was just...

Or like Josh Grobin. You know? And anything that wasn't that? Anything that wasn't that was like Spanish music that I didn't understand. I liked it kind of, but like I don't know what the fuck this is. You know, I like it about as much as I like the Dragon Ball theme song, but I wouldn't like sit and like listen to the Dragon Ball theme song like of my own accord. That's so...

Which one? Are we talking about like American or Japanese? we're talking about? I mean, I like all of them. But like, I mean, at that time, but like, I think everybody... I think everybody... I think the second you start liking music a lot is the second you can, like, understand, like, what it's saying.

Like, I think anytime, like, you lyrically decode music is, like, the moment that you're like, oh, this is... Okay. Like, I can grasp onto this and, like, figure out what the hell the rest of this medium is. With Spanish music, I had no idea what the fuck they were saying, so I had no opportunity for that. I was like, I like, I like this sound, I guess, but I don't care. And stuff like that.

I had some key moments of where I was always more leaning towards like band type stuff because of theme songs of cartoons and stuff. There's a show called King Arthur and the Knights of Justice that was like, that's my shit, Power Rangers. Like that's like hearing the guitars do that shit. I'm like, what's happening? I want to do that. But then hip hop culture.

and people that looked like me were on TV all the time and I gravitated towards that so quickly for a few years of my life where that was, I was convinced I'm like, I want to rap, I want to do this, I started getting kind of good. Like my flows was kind of good and I was, I never had though,

because this is kind of like you're either born with it or not, kind of like art, like a drawing well. Freestyleing is the same way. You can't really work on it because you're never going to be as good as people that just have it. Like fucking, you have somebody like, Some people are just like, some people are Eminem and you're like, but that's what I mean.

That's a different, it's like you can work on drawing, but you're never going to be as good as somebody that just has that thing. There's whatever it's called, you just have that thing where you can just look at something and draw it and it'll look the same where I can only trace. I can't fucking do it. I literally cannot see something right next to me and draw it the way that I can't do it for whatever reason. And freestyle is like the same principle where there's this biggie who's dumb as a sack of rocks. but was a lyrical fucking just God, like the way that he can do his shit. You know what that is, right?

What? It's definitely autism. I'm not going to say autism. So you're saying, talent is autism. You're saying talent is autism. Hold on. Let's be real for a second.

I had a moment, I had a moment the other day where I was watching, like, I can't remember if it was like a TikTok or like something I saw on Twitter, but it was this video of like Neil Patrick Harris standing in front of this kid on like some game show.

And this kid was like, and Neil Patrick Harris was like, all right, spell these like really long words backwards real fast. And he was just doing it like real quick and I'm like, that's Eminem. Right now with Ram Trucks Declaration of Deals, well-qualified current FCA lessees, get a low mileage lease on the 2026. Ram 1500 Big Horn crew cab, 4 by 4 for 369 a month for 39 months with 4,099 due at signing. Tax, title, license extra. No security deposit required. Call 1-877 RAM 5722 for lease details. requires dealer contribution and lease through Stalantis Financial.

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That I see turning in Evan and whatever you like freestyles or rhymes like obituary with ham sandwich somehow And it like fucking works And it's like there's there's a level of uh because like you said like biggie like these aren't like necessarily like um you know even just like rock stars too like to some extent they're like these aren't like the most educated people but for some reason they're just like brilliant and it's one thing and they barely had to work at it some of them and it's like how do you explain that other than just like

natural talent everyone has that thing they're just good at everyone has that thing they're just good at everyone has that they're uncannily good at but what is the difference but what is the difference. I mean, look, Chris, never mind. If, if scientists, if people smarter than us

come out and say all of these things are considered attributes on the spectrum, then I will agree with you. Before that, I don't want to come to that conclusion

that Biggie, Eminem, or fucking autistic. Biggie Eminem, Andre 3,000, fucking Kendrick Lamar, Joey Bat, fucking every rapper

down the line, oh, these are all just autistic people. Dude, that would be crazy. offended. There's nothing wrong with being autistic. There's nothing wrong with being autistic.

No. But the fact that you're immediately dis lumbering all these people that's in its group of this thing, that there is genuinely no president for it's like, look, man, all I'm saying is that they're turning to frogs gay with the stuff they're putting in the water. You sound like that. Look, man,

if I could spell fucking press the digitation backwards in five seconds, I'd rather have whatever that kid has than whatever I got right now. I'll trade you. I'll I'll trade you. I'll change you my problems for your problems. I want to know about that kid's social life, though.

I want to know what's probably a really bad one. What if it's not? What if you go? What if you go to his, well, he's like nine. He's like nine. He's like a social life. Yo, I know it happens, bro.

It happens. In America, not really, but in other countries, it happens. We got to move on. Let's move on to some updates about the show. My God. updates. The first solo episode is live, obviously because the last episode got fucked. I felt like I owed the patron something.

So there's a solo episode live. I recorded mine a while ago, so it might... I heard you just talking about your ass for an hour. My whole ass. My entire ass. I was just talking about my dark cavernous anus. For about an hour and a half. So you can go...

Dark! So you can go listen to that. That's on the Patreon. That's an exclusive one until we can get the lost episode back. up and I bet I could probably give it to some audio wizard and they'll figure it out, but it's going to take a while. So that's live. And also, I want to, we didn't mention this in the Lost episode, but, you know, it's gone. So right now, we've got a guest lined up for March this month, and it is the wonderful, talented Jonathan Young. He will be on the show

at the, towards the end of the month, towards the end of this March. And I think we're going to do Young Crip in April. Nice, nice. And we'll figure out from there. But we got some pretty cool people on the docket. So stay tuned for that shit. Young Criber's going to be refreshing. That's going to be a good time because he, uh...

Yo, he goes hard in the paint, man. I, even when I'm on, even when I'm like the most sweet I am, when I'm like just, Kingston's taking a backseat and a shadowy figure is sitting in the chair. He blows me out the water every time where I'm just, like bro, you gotta not say that. You gotta, you can't say that dude. That's not okay. But he's got,

he's got the past, man. Like, it's one of those things when, when somebody, when somebody is considered by like normies to, to like be like an, oh, like poor,

you know, you know that cinnamon. Poor you. Or it's like since he's, since he's disabled. Yeah. Like, oh, like he's,

you get to take full advantage of just being a complete degenerate. And it's like, fuck off, man. Like, like I, my life is hard enough. fuck off. I'm going to have a great time. He is Edward Pass. I'm trying to tell me. I give him the Edward Pass.

If he wanted to say it, I wouldn't get mad. Because, like, dude, like, come on. Like, that, that motherfucker is a trooper for, because you think about, like, how good we have it and shit. He's more of a negative and I ever been. I give him. I give it to him. I'll never take it for him. Would I have the... Yeah.

Did you see, what's his name? Oh, wait, let me say this before. This is the weirdest shit. This is the weirdest thing, because you're talking. You were mentioning Jonathan Young. And then I would have moved after that. So I just recently did a cover with him. I didn't instant cover with him.

And then out of nowhere, Azalea Banks I remember that. shares that shit in the fucking inner story. Who is that exactly, though? Right now with Ram Trucks Declaration of Deals, well-qualified current FCA lessees, get a low mileage lease on the 2026.

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comps. They can tell you about flood zones, mixed use zones, and decode acronyms like H-O-A-A-P-R-M-LS. They connect you to lawyers, contractors, even Phil, the Seward scope guy. They negotiate, coordinate,

advocate for you, close the deal with you, and hand the keys to you. They bring you home. Real Tours are members of the National Association of Realtors, right by you. Isalia Banks is somebody that just,

she is an artist, she's a hip-hop artist, but her, she's notoriously known for beefing with, like, everyone. beefing with Iggy Azalea, just beefing with fucking just people in general.

That's just like, she just has like a lot and then she does a lot of weird shit and says a lot of crazy shit. So I guess somehow she stumbled upon my fucking channel, I guess, and then started looking at my music,

shared a couple of things. And then from that, fucking Amber Rose. Amber Rose, I look, I saw on my Instagram, I saw like Amber Rose followed you and I'm like,

oh, it's probably just some, that's a troll. Like, it's just a fake page. And I click on it, fucking 20 million followers. I'm like, what the fuck is this?

And then so I'm just like, okay, this is the most random shit ever. So I just said, hey, thanks for the follow. I don't know what the fuck to say. And then she was like, oh yeah, like, you know, I saw you on Azalea. I love metal and stuff. And we start talking about system of it down.

I was like, and I was like, dude, am I getting fucking crazy? Would you clap her cheeks? Would you clap those cheeks if you had the chance? God damn, we got to cut that out. We're going to ruin his chances. I guarantee you.

She's not going to listen to this. Like, what is the odds? Like, I still, like, feel like I'm kidding. It was a pretty high guarantee that she wasn't going to. You know what, that's true. She might be, your, your chances might be higher, and I might have destroyed them. So get this. Fresh cut, fresh cut.

If I were, let's put this, let's put this energy. Let's put this energy out there. Number one, she's married. So let's put that energy out there. There's a goalie. I still try to score, bro. What you mean? If she, look, if she was, if she was.

Oh, that's. Jesus Christ, that is so... That's pretty good. I'm so against that, but it's so clever. So ignorant. If I was a... If I wasn't... If her and I were freebirds,

I would for sure shoot my shot just because... Just because the opportunity is there. Yeah, that's such a... It's such a stupid... That's clout. Look, look, so... So there's one thing, I'm just... All I'm going to try to do is see if I can capitalize off of this in a way that...

She said she likes this to them down. I am literally... working on a system of down cover right now. Smart, smart, smart. I want her to share this shit. And then randomly, you guys heard of that's bullshit clubhouse? Have you heard of that app?

I have no idea what that is. It's just a thing where, it's a community of people that just talk and you listen to their conversations and you have an opportunity to possibly join in. So a bunch of celebrities are on there. It's an app that a bunch of celebrities are on and they're having conversations about random bullshit.

And you can just listen in. But right now, you have to be invited to be on it. You can't just sign up for the app. Guess who invited me to be on it? fucking amperf. That's cool. And so it's weird because it says specifically that you're invited by whomever did it. And so it says that.

And people are like, what the fuck is this? And I'm like, you tell me, man. Like, I guarantee you, like, this is going to go away. Like, it's just a weird little thing right now. And it's going to go away and I'm forever going to be confused. Like, that people that I would love to, like, oh, I see Snoop Dog follows Azale and all this stuff. I'm like, why didn't Snoop Dog see it and maybe follow me? Oh, that's amazing.

I want to talk to Snoop Dog, but like Amber Rose, who I've never thought about in my life, other than her having, she used to have a tattoo of Wiz Khalifa and now it's fucking slash. That's like the only thing that I fucking think about her. She was fucking with Wiz Khalifa. And now it's slash. And I'm like, dude, that's fucking hilarious. Listen, man. Look, all I'm saying is this, dude.

All I'm saying is this. Could you imagine you get invited to one of those by someone you really don't want to meet? Like you get invited to fucking Bill Cosby and this escape strategies or something like that. Although you get invited by fucking like you get invited by Epstein and it's like what you call it. Epstein and it's like what you call it children with like very derelict parents. And it's like what the fuck is going on here? Do you like you get invited by fucking Don Chito to like I don't know like like like like Nancy. Pelosi's house and you're like, wow.

You're like, what? Let's go play apiscape at Nancy Pelosi's house with Don Cito. Like, how to fuck do you know? And she's really good at it. Like, she's really good at apiece. She's unbelievable. She's like, I got good at this in the 70s. And I'm like, what the fuck do you mean?

What is this sub-text of this conversation? You got good at this 1998 video game in the 70s? And she's not, and she's not lying. There's not a hint of a lie there. Like, she has a lie to her arm, but he's like, I'm not even fucking with it right now. Look at me.

Drug me right now. I can't lie. Use the truth serum. Someone brings out the truth serum in like a fucking, like a little box. You get invited a second time and she's like, yo, I got the remastered ghost and goblins.

You're trying to hit this up or what? Yeah, we're going to play on legend. We're going to play on legendary. Are you down? You're like, I fucking, I beat this shit.

I beat this shit without dying. Can you fucking? fucking top that shit. Could you imagine Nancy Pelosi is like hella cool? No. Like fundamentally she is the coolest person ever. And you're like, yo, why are you so against helping people? And she's like, honestly, it's not even me.

It's just what I have to do. I've been. So I've been taking, because everybody's been getting on my case lately about like making fun of anime, right? So? Yeah. So I was like, all right, give me a list of anime. I'll watch it, right? Oh, God.

So I've been curating some anime right now. The first one that I'm on is Parasite, right? And I'm watching Parasite. And the whole time I'm watching Parasite, I'm thinking Nancy Pelosi. The whole time. The whole time. By the way, it's a good show. It's pretty good.

It's pretty good. I like it. It's weird enough that I'm like, okay, I'm interested in it. When there's that many animas out there, there's going to be some lightning and a bottles, so to speak. You're going to have some really good ones. Yeah, yeah. But, like, the whole thing is about.

about like all these like barely human people walking around and infecting other people. And I'm like, that's just, this whole thing is about Nancy Pelosi. This whole fucking thing. Pelosi and what's his name? It's setting up, it's a, it's a parasite is a Nancy Pelosi origin story. Like without a doubt, without a shadow of a doubt. Look, Nancy could be cool. She can be like reverse Obama where Obama seems cool as shit.

But Obama's probably a piece of shit behind the scenes. He's probably like pushes kids over and stuff. Slaps Michelle and stuff. He probably gets in a boxing matches with kids. He probably has, like, membership where he goes and he box his children that never boxed.

Like Obama's like on the side of the ring like on a turn, but he's getting peps like, all right, Barry, you got this one. He's like, yeah, I know it. He goes out. Me and Bo about to fuck you up, he's not pulling. He's not pulling in. He punches. He's fucking them up.

Did you guys read that interview that Obama gave in like 2004 where he was talking about how he like, he met Bill Cosby and he introduced him to melatonin? Oh, no, you fucking lying ass bitch. Oh, my God.

You got me for a second. He's like, now listen here, right, listen here, right? Wouldn't that be fucking wild? That'd be insane. You know what'd be crazy? If a child Barack Obama was the one who sold Bill Cosby his first fucking roofie. A child Barack Obama. Like a kid, like he shows up somewhere.

And he's like, you really want to get that girl, how Mr. Cosby? Why don't you try this? He's hands him a bag of it. He's nine. He's nine years old. This is before Gorilla Grod tries to kill him in college. He's like, here you go. Here you go, Mr. Cosby.

Trust me, it works like a charm. I'm trying to feed my dog, Bo. Me and my dog Bo are going to appreciate this in the future. He's like, how do you know about Bo already? You know about Bo? His dog's name is Bo Bama? Oh, Bama? His dog's name is.

Bob, Bob, Syria. That's what his dog's name is. Bom, bomb, bomb. The guys are stripped. Bomb the strip. Bomb the strip.

Yo, Obama's like son of Sam and his dog, Bo. Fucking. Oh, man. Come here, drone strike. Come here, boy.

Come here. Come here, drone strike. I'm going to send you to Syria and Yemen. That doesn't even work because Bo is Biden's dog, right? No, Bo is Obama's dog. Oh, Bo's Biden's dead son.

That's not funny. Whoa, whoa, I'm gonna stop. That's not funny. That's not funny. It's not funny at all. It's not funny. The idea of the fact that he named a dog after a dead person is respectable, but also kind of like, what the fuck?

At the same time. Boy's name is Bo. Why we name the dog Bo? I don't know. It's just like a... It's a good dog name. Bo? No, not really.

Come here, Bo. Yeah, it's a great dog. No, it's not. What syllable names for pets is fucking pristine? I mean, I have the best pet name on a planet. What is it? Pistachio. That's fucking no.

That's a perfect name for a little dog. It's not at all. You guys are stupid in pistachio. That's way too many syllables. That's such a cute little name. Keep it simple for your pet, you piece of shit. I'm not going to name my pet. You're not going to name my pet.

I'm not going to name my pet. Or fucking animal or fucking pet my dog with a pet name is pet Name your fucking dog dash come here dash He recognizes the syllable here's the word doesn't understand what it means but here's it and it's very simple for the dog I'm naming the dog You're a dumb ass and you don't give a fuck about your pet Yeah obey much better if you do simple things We oh come here pistachio

I mean come here anti-dist establishmentarianism Why the fuck what that that's a different than pistachio Pistachio is a cute sounding name you asshole I'm not naming my cat's super fragile. I'm not naming my cat that. I'm not naming my cat fucking phasaurus, fucking Omni syllabus. I'm not doing that. It's just pistachio.

Calm down. Tensions are high right now and they don't need to be. Listen, that is a dumb name. It's not a dumb name. That's a great name. That is such a cute name. Right now with Ramtruck's declaration of deals, well-qualified current FCA lessees, get a low mileage lease on the 26.

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VALA through 325, while supplies last. Selection varies by location. Turf builder offer excludes Alaska and Hawaii. We have everything you might want for the end of winter. Visit your nearby lows on Renier Avenue South in Seattle. Because you know what you're going to do? You're going to shorten that dog's name anyway out of convenience. not going to say pistachio every time you're going to say pissy or something

yeah piss pissy what the fuck pissy look I'll look it okay I'll give me this I'll give me this man I'll I'll give me this I'll give me this pissy he's such a fucking shitty name Pissy that's so fucked up come here Pissy that's just an insult this is a fucking Insult hey busy Hey Pizzie hey could be busy now um look it I'll give I'll give you this Sweeney because I thought of this beforehand Because I am going to have a husky named Magneto.

But obviously, I would never call him Magneto. So I'm going to call him Nito. Like this for short. So I'm going to call my dog Nito, but his full name is Magneto. I've thought this out beforehand because I'm not an asshole. I'm not going to call my dog Magneto because it's just, it's astute. It's just animals are simple creatures. If you respect them, then it will give you the respect that you want.

Obviously, I understand that. But this is your like pistachio It's so cute What's a fucking Italian or something What is it? The only thing The only way it's acceptable The only way it's acceptable

To name your dog something that long Or to name your pet something that long Is if it's a pet that can't respond to names anyway Like if you have like a fish or like a lizard You can name your lizard fucking You know Whatever the hell you want It's either gonna be pistachio or fucking government

Get them government Kill them government It's not a bad name for a... Tell him, Gov. For like a fucking Rotweiler or something. A fucking derage pit bull. A pit bull that's... Where is he?

Where's government? Go on get government out the back. That's actually... That's the exception, bro. That's actually a pretty good name. That is the exception. The dog is just angry, dude. The dog is just shaking with anger, dude.

It walks out of fucking... God fucking damn it. There's a whole backstory. that's like, there's a whole line of poetry to that name too where it's like, oh man, this old man named his dog government just so he can feel just for once that the government is on his side. Just for once. I own the government.

The government actually helps me. The government cares about me. The government protects me. The government. He's talking about his dog. That's so fucking sad. That is real sad. Such an angry dog.

The dog is, the dog was happy. until he gave it that name. The puppy was happy, and he was like, I'm going to name a government, and then as soon as he does it, it starts shaking, and it's mad.

It starts to rioting and barking. It's a puppy, but it's stealing all of your money. You can't smile anymore, even though dogs kind of naturally do that. It doesn't have the happy dog phase. It just looks mad, and it's out to kill somebody always.

He sleeps bearing his teeth. Could you imagine that? You check your ID, and it says, It says government. And it's a picture of a fucking hound dog. It's never been to a mirror and you're a dog. And the whole entire world changes.

You turn back from the mirror and you're in a dog house. You turn back to where the mirror was and it's no mirror there. You're like, what's going on? What game is this? This entire time. That's, what do you do in that scenario? Do you just fucking... You're a dog.

Live your life. You live your dog life. I guess. You're a dog with human intelligence at least Because you're aware enough to know that So you just live your life as a dog Being a dickhead to people But with human intelligence

That's worse though I feel like it's worse to be a dog with human intelligence Then it would be just to be a dog No, it's definitely better to be a dog Human Intelligence Well, because you can be an asshole Like you're a dog But let's say like

All right hold on If you're a dog with dog If you're a dog with human intelligence Do you still have dog instincts? Probably not Or do you have human instincts Probably have human instincts Right

Exactly. So you're just not suited to the body that you're right. But you probably have animal scented, so it's probably overwhelming a lot of shit. Yeah. Yeah, you're just going to get hit by a fault. You're going to get picked up by a falcon. That doesn't happen often, Chris. Are you kidding? Your dog get picked up by a falcon.

My dog could not have it. It was a full-grown German Shepherd. Do you know how big falcons are? Chris, not big enough to pick up a German Shepherd. Don't even- Chris, don't even argue this with me. You're going to make me so upset. Don't even argue this with me. You're going to say.

Oh, my God. Your falcon was an anomaly, I'm in New York right now. I'm in New York. I was driving this. Falcons all over. There's not Falcons all over the place in New York. First of all.

I live there too. We grew up in the same places. We both lived in the Bronx and upstate New York. The smallest, the smallest falcon on record is 5.10. Okay. Five, sure. You know how.

Just as big. Chris, if that was real humans would have never made it to the point we're at. If Falcons were that, if the mini falcons were that big. That's a baby That's a baby Those are thunderbirds then pretty much Just the fucking Native American

Fucking birds that fly in the sky Turns dark Yeah Yeah Yeah Yeah, duh Same size as Falcons yeah Yeah duh

Should we move on to some questions Yes please Yeah let's Let's bang them out baby We're devolving already Um So somebody Parker

Parker Luke and Bach wrote And actually like With a topic To kind of talk about Cool Cool that sounds cool And I picked I picked this because it's interesting

Okay. Hey, tragedy plus time harder than you think in arms of sorrow. Have there ever been any noticeable or non-awkward times you've been recognized in public? I briefly ran into Sweeney at L.A. Comic-Con a few years back. I did. I feel like I remember that. You remember that? Well, how many times does this happen to you in general?

You must remember this, right? A lot, dude. People ran into me often, dude. I feel like, has it stopped since the pandemic has started? Because I noticed that, like, exactly. But, like, you know, when we are out, we have masks on and stuff? Yeah. You know?

I will tell you, it doesn't stop. I've been recognized twice with my fucking mask on, and it really upset me because... I was hiding. Yeah, and the thing is, though, I had a... I heard it on a podcast because it was the same sentiment. It was Tom Segura. He was talking about that. He's like, what the fuck?

They're still recognizing me? But then he thought about it. He saw Ben Affleck with a mask on. And he's like, oh, I instantly recognized him. So, okay, I get it. So you just kind of thinking yourself that, like, ah, You probably can't see me, but people still recognize your frame and fucking everything. True.

And, yeah, because I went, the last time I went to a guitar center, and I just wanted to get my guitar restringed. And then immediately, the dude was like, oh, you're that, you're the YouTuber. And I was like, what the fuck? I was like, dude, I have a hat on, glasses, mask, and, like, everything is completely concealed other than just, like, a little bit of this space. But they just know. And that's, it's pretty weird because, especially when you're expecting it and not. to happen. That's what was so weird about it. People run normal all the time. You never,

you never expect it. People constantly. That's true. You're Sweeney, dude. I'm like, yeah, dude. Oh, dude, you're so fucking funny, man. No one's ever been like, ah, I hate the gays. Thank God. Thank Lord. No one's ever done that. But I was like, oh, yeah, you're so funny. Just like, thank you. Can I have a picture? I'm like, yeah, for sure, dude. You know what's fucked up?

I, usually whenever I've gone to, like, say, Popeyes, for example, I've gone to the drive-through. The few times that I've gone inside Like I'm talking about three different times And I've probably gone inside of Popeye's Maybe like five times So three times There was somebody into that recognized me And I was like, dude, is this racist?

Like what's happening here? Like I don't even go to Popeyes that often But there's like people At one time it was two different people One guy was talking to me And then another guy didn't want to interrupt And he messaged me on Instagram Like oh dude I saw you when Popeyes

I'm like are you fucking kidding Like dude what is happening with Popeye? Yeah, I get those more often than anything else where it's like, hey, I still think I saw you walking around downtown Burbank. And I was like, yep. Yeah, you did. Yeah, you did. I live there. Dude, the weirdest one was, this was when I was barely starting to, my YouTube was barely starting to take off on in like late 2016.

I was in Greece and I was in the mall. And I got a message on Instagram. I'm like, dude, fucking, were you at the mall in Athens? I'm like, are you fucking serious? Like, there's these fucking greasy Mediterranean's watching my. I shit. You see Mediterranean. You fucking asshole.

Oh my God. I love the Greek people, man. You sound like Trump. You sound like Trump right now. No, but I'm being authentic. I'm serious. I really liked being. I love the Greek people.

I love the Greek. They're so greasy and lovely. I love the Mediterranean. I like the ocean. I like the sea. So. I like the... Go ahead.

There is this one story. It's not about me being recognized because I don't think those are as interesting. but it's, I went to a, I went to a dollar shave club, like, uh, like party thing at like VidCon.

Like they have these like, sometimes, sometimes sponsors have these like weird kind of like, like, uh, one hour long like meeting things for like some of their, um, some of the people who, uh, do sponsor work for them and, you know, it's literally just to give them some swag and just to maybe like talk about like

future deals and stuff. This is a pretty common thing that happens at, at VidCon. And, one time I went and I saw somebody that I thought I recognized, right? Because there's a lot of channels out there that, like, I'm sure you'll recognize these channels if you do a little bit of deep, if you did a lot of like YouTube or YouTube, you know, algorithm searching in like 2018.

There were all these channels that were like the philosophy of Rick and Morty and all these like really long video essays about like obvious or like 25 things you missed. Like these basic really kind of cookie cutter channels. And I saw this one guy who I think. think is from like new rock stars or something they're just the channel that does this that type of shit and i thought it was wise cracked so i was like oh you're wise cracked right and he goes uh no new rock stars and i was like oh what's the difference you said that i said i said that but i didn't like chris i didn't mean it like so come on dude i didn't no listen for real though like they

they have the same kind of voices it was very easy to mix them up but i was just like I just thought of it like, oh, ha, ha, you know, what's the difference? It's like, if somebody came up to me and was like, oh, yeah, your shoe on head, right? I was like, no. And somebody was like, what's the difference or something? It's like, it's so mean. It'd be funny. That's not funny.

But like, but I quickly, no, but it's fine because I'm used to that. But at the same time, I was like, oh, I don't know this guy at all. So I was just a total asshole to this dude. And I was just like, and I just walked, I walked away from him. Just walked away. I was like, all right. Yeah, he was leaving anyway. but like I'll never forget that.

Later asshole, fucking loser. You walk off. I knew it while I was saying it too, but like I knew I couldn't stop myself mid-sentence because I would look like a psycho. So I just finish it and turn, like mid-finish,

I just turned and walked away. That's like even way worse. Oh yeah, I know. I'm going to say this really shitty shit and then fucking just. It's like a kid that comes up. It's like one of those.

Piece of shit. I remember, I made a, this, I actually still have this picture, and I've been meaning to post it, where I met Ian, Nerd City. Yeah. And we were hanging out at this bar or something. And I pulled out my phone, like the front face center, we get ready to take a picture. And I asked him, like, hey, man, do you mind if I call you Nward City?

And he fucking made the most, like, his face so authentically like, are you fucking retarded kind of face? And I snapped it. And I'm like, it's such a great moment. moment. And then like I showed him a picture and he was dying and I'm like, dude, I need to show people this and know and they need to know the context of this that I really want to call him inward city. But you know, but I'm censoring it of course. So, because it was more of a, it's one of those things that you can't, you can't duplicate, you got to have your camera ready because you can't duplicate moments like that. There's some moments, yeah, there's some moments I was just

had cameras for it. It's like, wow, I can't believe that just happened. Yeah, pretty good. Getting good authentic reactions of seeing people here just really absurd shit. Like, are you fucking stupid? And then kind of get in their face, it's great. There's nothing better. N-wordson. Anyway. I love that guy.

It's so fucking hilarious. Yeah, he's pretty cool. All right. Let's go on to some questions. Right? Let's do it. Let's go. Let's fucking just do this shit.

Ironic robot, Rodin. He says, how much do spoilers affect your enjoyment of something? Do you think you might as well skis? Wait, what? Do you think you might as well skip something if you got a major spoiler revealed for it? It depends. Not for me.

That's interesting. I was genuinely talking about this last night before I went to sleep. And I was saying that, and you're right, it does depend. But it definitely, it lessens the experience, no matter what, because the art of surprise or whatever is gone. So it's not going to hit you as hard,

But like I said, it depends. And the one I was talking about specifically, and maybe I mentioned this before, was this piece of shit I know, Felipe. He, when Gears 3 came out, he fucking, the same day he beat the campaign. And then later on, after he beat it, he went on Facebook and said,

I can't believe Dom died. And I hadn't played it yet. I was going to get it like a few days after. And I was like, why would you, why would you do that? I just, ever since then, I've always hated him. because it's just such it's just that type of person that would even fucking do that can you wait a little bit that god damn bro so i knew it was coming i i saw like right before

the the mad world music kicked in where it was happening i already knew it was coming and i was pissed off because i i didn't feel it where it would have been like a really nice scene where he sacrifices himself to save his fucking the cogs and yeah i was just like a piece of shit like And I forever associate him with Gears 3 now. It sucks. That's crazy. He's just, he's immortal in your mind.

He's living with just connected. Totally. Totally. That sucks. For me, I don't care about spoilers. I've never cared that much because I care about, I care about the whole thing for the most part.

So, like, it's like, I knew about the Red Wedding before I haven't watched Game of Thrones, you know. But it's different because the fucking books existed for so damn long. Oh, but, like, but still, like, you know, like, it's very different in the books. The very different. The Red Wedding is very different.

in the books. But for me, it was just like, I want to see what leads up to this. I want to know exactly what happens. And that's what I care about the whole piece. Someone sat down in front of me and was like, so at this very moment, what you call it? Rob Star is going to walk in to the freaking with a phrase house. He's going to sit the wife down. Katlin's going to fucking fall over and get her neck slick continue to scream, fall to the left. I'll be like, damn. Right now with Ram Trucks Declaration of Deals. Well qualified current FCA lessees. Get a low mileage lease on the 26. Ram 1500 Big Horn. crew cab four by four for 369 a month for 39 months with 4,099 due at signing.

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I've got Dan Morgan here on the pod. Say hi, hi, Dan. Hey, how's it going today? It's going good, man. tell us who you are and what you do. I'm Dan Morgan. I'm an attorney and a managing partner at Morgan and Morgan, which is America's largest injury law firm. That's pretty awesome.

I think I saw Billboard of Years recently that said 20 billion one. 20 million is an insane number. Yeah, 20 billion recovered. It's actually, I think, somewhere north, probably closer to 22, 23 after this year. And each year we get bigger and batter and our army grows. So the number will hopefully keep getting bigger and bigger as time goes on. Awesome. So how does someone get in contact with Morgan and Morgan?

What would I do if I got into an accident? Probably the easiest way is dialing pound law. That's pound 529 from your cell phone. We are always open. Our call center is always waiting to take your call. 24-7, 365. Wow. Dan Morgan.

From Morgan and Morgan, America's Large Injury Law Firm, thanks for coming by the show. Thanks for having me. Visit forethepeople.com for an office near you. Everything about this is fucking spoiled me. But if this certain events are spoiled, I'm like, well, I guess. I'll still watch it though.

I... If it's something I don't care much about. Sure. You know? If it's like Star Wars or some shit, I don't care. Yeah. You know, like I don't give a shit.

I thought the Han Solo spoilers was hilarious. What? The Han Solo? What? The Han Solo for the New Star Wars? When he got fucking shanked by his son? Yeah. Like the fucking...

There was so many spoilers. There was a dude that fucking put decal on his car about that spoiler was driving around. So fucked. That's just so fucked up, dude. But it was wrong with you. Is that your personality being a piece of shit? Absolutely.

That's like what a piece of shit. But at the same time since I don't care, it was kind of funny. Like I was like, wow, I can't believe somebody did this. Or they would make like meme formats on Twitter that, you know, when you open it, the bottom would reveal. Dude, those are so perfect. The fact that people, the fact that people make. shit like that. Like someone did that for Infinity War and I almost clicked it.

And my friend was like, don't open that shit. If you open that, it's going to spoil the ending for you. It was like, what do you call it? It was like, what was red, vaid, it's a blue. Tony Stark dies and the end game. And I'm like, what the fuck? Who does this? That's the thing, though.

It's like, I, if it's shit that I don't care about, then I'm obviously not going to care that much. You know, like, I'm loosely interested in Star Wars, but like, it's not going to bother me if somebody tells me like what happens in the last episode of the Mandalorian, you know? Sure. Because I just like, ah, whatever, I can, but if it's something I give a shit about, if, like, if it's like,

the new halo. If, yeah, if the new halo gets, like, leaked or something, like, I'm, I'm getting off the internet. Like, it'll be really hard to fucking, I even said, like, on Twitch, like, when that game comes out and I stream it, I'm gonna, I'm, chat's gonna be off. Like, I'm not gonna be, I'm streaming it purely for my enjoyment. Like, there ain't nobody's gonna be talking to me,

sending me shit about, like, the final hours of the campaign, nothing. Fucking Master, she gets brutally gang banged by a bunch of brutes. You don't want to know about that? You don't want to know about that to prepare your fucking heart. No, I want to see it. I want to see that. That would fuck me. I wouldn't play the game.

If it shows that lock, what if it shows that lock shows up with Arbiter's fucking sword with Arbiter's head? I'd have to know that because if I see that while I'm on stream, I'm going to say something or I'm going to do something that's going to be like ridiculous. I'm going to stand up and screen the N-word as loud as I can. and then break my computer. I want to know before. I don't know, man.

I feel like that's part of like absorbing media is like kind of having it delivered to you in the way that like the person intended. Like I don't want to sit around. 100%. I feel like a lot of tension is like, imagine like the most tense movie that you've ever seen,

but you know the ending of. And you have to see the movie. There's no reason to be tense. Then there's no reason to watch the movie. All the tension is gone because the whole point of the movie is to be tense. That's true. But Joker still makes me tense

That's the most tense scene I've seen in the movie That's true Well, I don't know If it's the most tense scene I've seen it's definitely One of the most tense Seen one of the

But I think the reason why that scene is so tense in the first place Is because you had an experience At least once with it Where you didn't know What the fuck was going to happen And it kind of carries

Through every subsequent time Because it's so well done I think I don't know Like infinity That would have sucked If somebody like Would have spoiled

Infi-I think everybody Like everybody kind of had ideas as to like what would happen at the end of that movie but like I feel like at the end of end game if like somebody had been like oh this uh fucking cap takes mule near and fucking you know all this shit and I'm just like

why did you fucking say that dude? Yeah no I would do that. I was definitely more invested in uh in the Marvel cinematic universe than uh in the Star Wars and so it definitely would have upset me too uh I understand the people that were really invested in Star Wars that were doing all the spoilers I totally

understand why they were mad I just luckily, I was not that invested because I just knew reading, not what it was about, who was in charge, what was happening. I was like, this is going to be a disaster because it's not planned out. I was just like, oh, this is going to be bad. Like, you're only enjoy it in small burst and that's it. Yeah. I remember, I remember Halo 4. Halo 4 got spoiled for me, but like, at the same time, it was like, I didn't know if it was accurate because there were like all sorts of different.

spoilers and I only knew it was a spoiler until after I finished. So that was kind of good because there were like so many different like oh fucking MasterCchief becomes the green Eminem or whatever the fuck. Like you don't know what the fuck is really going to happen in that shit. But like when it's stuff like now it's hard to avoid because now they'll show you like now people will send you like full on MP4s of like the end of a movie, you know? Or like screenshots that are like really clear because they've been ripped from like a server somewhere. Back then it was just people in like comment sections being like Cortana dies and in Halo 4 or whatever the fuck, you know. But like now it's like it's hard. Right now with Ram trucks declaration of deals.

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Extra charge for miles over 32,500. Not all customers will qualify. Residency restrictions apply. Take delivery by 331. I've got Dan Morgan here on the pod. Say hi, Dan. Hey, how's it going today? It's going good, man.

Tell us who you are and what you do. I'm Dan Morgan. I'm an attorney and a managing partner at Morgan and Morgan, which is America's largest injury law firm. That's pretty awesome. I think I saw billboard of years recently that said $20 billion. 1. 20 million is an insane number. Yeah, 20 billion recovered. It's actually, I think, somewhere north, probably closer to 22, 23 after this year.

And each year we get bigger and badder and our army grows. So the number will hopefully keep getting bigger and bigger as time goes on. Awesome. So how does someone get in contact with Morgan and Morgan? What would I do if I got into an accident? Probably the easiest way is dialing pound law. That's pound 529 from your cell phone. We are always open. Our call center is always waiting to take your call. 24-7. five. Wow. Dan Morgan.

From Morgan and Morgan, America's Large Injury Law Firm, thanks for coming by the show. Thanks for having me. Visit furtherpeople.com for an office near you. It's harder and harder to be like, okay, that wasn't like a real spoiler.

That was just probably somebody just saying shit to just piss people off. You know, you know what I would love? You know what I would love? Because now it's accompanied by evidence. You know what I would love? I would personally love

if someone got the ending of One Piece and shared that all over the internet. That would be fucking hilarious. someone's just like oh at the end of one place they give a really deep analysis of what happens at the end and you're just like

fuck dude so many people would fuck I thought there'd be mass suicides that show is still happening that shows not even close to being done yet I haven't seen one second of it that's not true I saw

I think the main character like transforming in some giant buff monster thing yeah I saw that And I was like, what the fuck is this? And then that was it. It's called really, really badly drawn characters. Yeah, I don't know any, I literally don't know anything about it.

It just, it just, it comes to a point where it's like, dude, there's too much shit to watch. So you got to pick. What are you going to watch? I'm like, I have a few things and like, I'm not, the amount of people you need to see this. I'm like, I really don't. I just, I can't, like, I'm sorry. There's, it's too much shit on my plate already. Sorry.

Yeah. No, I hear you. All right. Oh, this actually is kind of appropriate. Dylan, the depressed gears fan. Damn, Dylan. I wonder if he got it spoiled, probably. Hello, man held together by hate, hate personified,

and comparatively level-headed Derek. What are your thoughts on how much is pretty accurate, I think? Derek is probably like the most of the same. Am I mad completely composed of hate? Am I just hatred? I would, hmm. I don't know if there's all that much of a distinction between held together by hate and hate personified.

I feel like I'm held together. And I'm just hate... Because it implies... I agree. Because the held together implies that I'm frail. I'm fractured. You're barely hanging on. Hate's keeping...

What's keeping you driven, I guess. And I'm just... I'm just... I'm just what hate turns into when it becomes a person. Yeah, exactly. What are your thoughts on how much nostalgia is used in modern design for game franchises? Thanks for the episodes. I die without them.

I actually don't. Oh, wow. I hate it. I actually don't. What do you mean? It's all Pokemon does. That's all Pokemon does nostalgia and it's horrible now. It's so, it's so, I can't look at a Pokemon game and get happy anymore because of the fact that all they, they just make one shitty region, then they're, like,

like, a remake, it's coming out. And I'm just like, damn, dude. Even Nintendo, actually, as Nintendo has a company, dude, all there, they're just coasting on freaking, what you call, nostalgia? Because they can't, they can't just make good new things. And every time they, they make one or two good new things. And then everything else is just re-release, re-release, re-release, release, release this again, put this out again, put this out again, put this out, and it's like, bro, make something

new, at least try. But I feel like everyone's doing that right now as a company, as company. as companies-wise, but like, Nintendo's the worst of it. The only thing in video games, other than Nintendo, because I don't really know that much,

like, in that realm, but for, like, other companies, I think the only thing you can really say that is somewhat of nostalgia

is just remakes. Other than that, I don't really see nostalgia being shoved in a lot of, like, say, uh, uh, sequels of IPs or just new ones and,

you know what I'm saying? Like, I don't really, I don't have a, uh, just a glaring, example. Yeah.

I don't know if it's that big of a problem either. I think there's definitely like people, there's definitely like, like, really easy, like kind of, um,

oh my God, what's the word, uh, for just kind of like, um, lazy. Yeah, just like lazy re-releases and like HD versions of like,

like, fucking Twilight Princess or whatever the fuck. Is it Twilight Princess or Skywood Sword that's coming out? I think it was, Skywood Sword. Okay. That they're selling Skyward sword at $60, which by the way is $10 more

than it was when it came out on the Wii. Yep. In 2021, that's kind of insane. That is just completely unjustifiable to me, especially when you have just so many better collections. You have like obviously the Metal Gear collection, which is like, you know, significantly more valuable. You have fucking the Halo collection,

which is hilariously more valuable than that for like way less. It's very weird the way Nintendo does it, because they seem to market pretty heavily on nostalgia. But I don't know, nostalgia in and of itself isn't necessarily a negative thing. Because, like, Resident Evil 2 remake was technically just like an entirely, like, you could argue that that was kind of like a cash grab, but it also just was really, really good. And it was distinct from the original Resident Evil 2. Well, that's not a cash grab per se because I feel like, that's different. Resident Evil 2 was like one of my favorite video games of all time, you know?

And like that game is it is it's similar it's similar framework, but that's a different video game. Yeah. But it's it's this, it's enough of the same to where and this is a huge achievement to where I feel like I have no, I have no, I have no feeling to want to go back to the original. Yeah.

I am completely satisfied with the remake to where I don't need to play the original at all. I love that game. And I'm wondering, I hope they do that for four. I hope they knock it out of the hand. I don't love four like that. I love, I love four is fucking funny shit. I love five,

and I love, what do you call? I love five, and I love two a lot. And two. You like five, but you like four? I like five because of those,

the means in which I played. Like four is a good game, but the way I played five was just like me and my friend, we'd smoke weed, we'd listen to like seven Drake songs. We'd play that game. We'd play mercenaries.

We'd fuck the game. game like every day we play i think it has a lot to do with that with your experience and not just the game itself i would say four is a better game now i understand that i understand that look i a lot of people didn't give five enough credit i there's a lot of value that i got out of five um it's not looking there's a lot of people that are just did you play i played i played i i played i i played it a lot i played i played i played like maybe like four hours of it that game is really fun. I don't know. Like, I got, it wasn't bad. I just didn't really care for it that much. It took a while for me to even like Resident Evil in the first place.

Was it too many Africans? What was it? Too many Africans. It was fucking bloody African Batson. God damn it. Do you remember when that was a thing? Do you remember when that's like a whole thing? That was the first. That was the first of any type of shit that would happen today. Like all this shit that's happening today. That was the first thing. That was the first thing. It was the first wave. That was 2010, or even earlier was 2000. It was earlier, because it came out in eight or nine. But two dozen...

It was nine, I think of seven. And five came out. I thought it came on ten. I could be wrong, no, no, no, no, no. It was eight, eight, eight, eight, eight. I remember it was eight, eight, eight. It was eight, really? Because I think I remember I was in Arizona at the time it came out.

Yeah. I put that game from release. Absolutely. Because I think I mentioned it that, um, because I was working at Amazon 2008. And I, that was one of the games that I lifted before it came out. And then I had, um, Yeah, because fuck Amazon And so that was my bonus, right?

And I was, I had like one of the top Two thousand nine You guys are right, 2009 Yeah, March. Okay. March 5th, so early, early 2009. I think it was supposed to be out before And then they pushed it a little bit or something.

It might have been. I played the demo first. But God, I played the living fuck out of it. I played that game. A lot. Like, we beat the story mode. We beat the story mode. Look, there's a lot of stupid shit in it.

Look, that's the one where Chris Redfield punches the boulder. It destroys a boulder by fucking doing a combo on it. It's such a hard input. You got to press fucking, you got to spin the fucking analog stick. Then you got a mass A and Y. Then you got to press X and B. And you're like, God, fucking damn. And he's like, it's like, it's hilarious.

He starts body shot in Iraq. I love how stupid that is. I actually love that because of how insanely like this is purely how you can tell this is a Japanese game. because in America nobody would in the right mind would do something like but the Japanese are like dude Chris is so strong

and mighty he's gonna destroy this boulder and they all fucking applauded in the office I know that's exactly how it went down That's exactly how it went down Sheva's bad as fun The Sheva's bad as stuff My wife

Sheva is And then you get some of those costumes bro Oh Sheva Red Riding Hood one and mercenaries bro Dude The tribal one she had two

The tribal one is fucking dope It is It is very understandable that you like Resident Evil 5 a lot given that you played with another person. That's true. Because playing that game by yourself was the worst. Sheva was so

terrible to control. Sheva would just walk in front of you constantly. I remember being like pissed. I remember being vividly pissed off about it. Like when I was playing it in like 2009 or whatever. I was like, damn. Well, she's supposed to get out your fucking way if you just aim your gun and she'll leave. But it takes her a second.

Like every single time. You're right about that. You're right about that. It's like really. It's like it's like this awkward amount of time where it's like why are you even in front of me in the first place but yeah I don't know Resident Evil 5 is fine like I like 4 a lot more and I didn't I don't even really have nostalgia for 4 I played

I started playing Resident Evil 4 for the first time like at the start of the pandemic so like I like I never touched it before like I knew about it and I had seen like my friends play through like portions of it I think Gus Gus Johnson I had tuned into like some of history

That's like his favorite game ever, and he plays it on Twitch every now and again. I remember jumping in on some of those streams. But I never had any real playtime as a kid with it. And I played it recently. And I was like, this is really good, actually, still. Like, the controls are still a little fucked up. But, like, it's one of those things where I feel like you could go into, like, the files and actually just fix it. Right now with Ram Truck's Declaration of Deals.

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Extra charge for miles over 32,500. Not all customers will qualify. Residency restrictions apply. Take delivery by 331. I've got Dan Morgan here on the pod. Say hi, Dan. Hey, how's it going today? It's going good, man.

Tell us who you are and what you do. I'm Dan Morgan. I'm an attorney and a managing partner at Morgan and Morgan, which is America's largest injury law firm. That's pretty awesome. I think I saw Billboard of years recently that said 20 billion one. 20 billion is an insane number. Yeah, 20 billion recovered. It's actually, I think, somewhere north, probably closer to 22, 23 after this year. And each year we get bigger and batter and our army grows. So the number will hopefully keep getting bigger and bigger as time goes on. Awesome. So how does someone get in contact with? Morgan and Morgan. What would I do if I got into an accident? Probably the easiest way is dialing pound law. That's pound 529 from your cell phone. We are always open. Our call center is always waiting to take your call.

24-7, 365. Wow. Dan Morgan. For Morgan and Morgan, America's Large Injury Law, from, thanks for coming by the show. Thanks for having me. Visit forethepeople.com for an office near you. And it would be a perfectly playable game today. This, like, a version that they put up on Steam or wherever or now on PlayStation or whatever the fuck, they fucked with controls. They weren't the same on PS2. There's a weird thing. They did the same thing with, I think I might have said this before.

They did the same thing with GTA4, where they put this controls in a way that like moving your, the right analog stick isn't the way that you completely just turn yourself. You can kind of like, it's like they did a weird thing. They really fucked it up in my opinion. I'm not sure

what's the purpose of it, but I know there's probably somebody that knows, you know, a lot more about like controls. They can tell me exactly what it's called. But I had a hard time playing Resonable 4 in any other format because of that

because it's like oh I can't control the way that say the way Residentable 5 controls you'll see the way that Resident Evil 5 controls is the way that RE4 is supposed to be

the same It's supposed to be exactly the same I totally hear you yeah but look let me tell you why Residentable 5 is fun just because

if you get the stun rod I'm telling you it's the most fun you'll have Because you just fuck people up, dude, and then you just go and start punching the shit out of them, you kick their asses so hard. And you don't run out of stun. You just fuck people up. It's great. Redfield punches.

He punches so many Africans' heads open. It's fantastic, dude. He punches their heads wide the fuck open. I'm like, yo, there's one part in the game where you do like a donkey kick, like, Schepa, shoot. someone in the back of the leg and as you can shoot in the back of the leg and like they um they do this weird like because they're certain because you um you shoot people in the legs in that game to be able to get like the finisher moves on them so me and my friend got so good he got so good at that game that we started skipping parts of boss fights we literally there was one point in a game where

you fight west care in like um temple and he's supposed to fight him then jill comes out for seven minutes him and jill and then he just like then you eventually fight them both the same time Me and my friend got so good at that part That we didn't even see Jill anymore We got the automatic rocket launcher He would shoot him with one rocket launcher Then we'd shoot him with another one He would just fall down

He would stay down for like An indefined amount of time And we would just beat on him And it was so like That's one of my favorite game experiences Ever of all time I think It is a fun co-op thing But I'm telling you

If you've never played it When you get the stun rod Because it's like how you say shoot limbs it works the same. It activates you to fuck the shit out of them by it'll stun them or you'll hit them like three times and their heads will explode.

It's just the stun rod is the best just ridiculous weapon in that game bar none. Yeah, but I don't know. I'll play that with you. I mean you should play a playthrough of that. That'd be hilarious. I'm actually down.

I'm down for that shit. I'm down. We can stream that. We can stream a playthrough of us playing fucking Resident Evil altogether. That'd be hilarious. And that's why nostalgia wins. Yep, you never mind.

Nistolger's lit. Nistolger is cool. You know, honestly, like, I don't think it's bad. I do think genuinely, like, nostalgia is, it can be used as, like, a huge marketing thing, but I think it also can be used as, like, a way for, like, a series to kind of get back on track. Because there are definitely, like, games that I've played that, like, you look at them today versus, like, how they used to be, and it's just, like, what the fuck? Like, how far have you strayed from, like, what the reason is that people even care about this in the first place?

True. You know? And, uh, I think it can be. like, I don't know, I think it's useful in some ways. And I think because of it, you get really cool shit like Resident Evil 2 remake. Yeah. You know, if if, if I have to

suffer through like a bunch of like generic, barely changed Pokemon games that I'm not going to play anyway. If it means I can get Resident Evil 2 remake, I'm fine. I'm fine with it. That's kind of how I see it. That game makes me happy, dude. Very few video games genuinely make me like,

oh, I love this video game experience. R.E. 2 is definitely one. of those games. I'm just like, I love this. Do they fucking Mr. X, man? They, they did such a fantastic job to where, like, I hate him so much. And that's what you're supposed to feel. You're like, okay. He just fucks up the fun.

Good job, guys. God damn it, he's here. Like, I can't even have a moment to think sometimes. I'm just like, all right, what should I do next? And then you start hearing him? I'm like, are you fucking serious? Does he go in the safe rooms in the hardest difficulty? No, no.

Is that what happens? No. He, uh, he, if you, if he, if he, is by you and sees you, a safe room doesn't mean anything. Like, so for example, like there's certain rooms that you can go into where it's like, oh, here's the typewriter or whatever.

But if he's right there, he'll just follow you and beat your ass. Like, you can't say. That's so fucking disheartedly. Like, say the beginning, the police station, the open area, like, who come in there and fuck you up, no problem. That's so disheartening. He's like, oh, hey, how you doing? Like, let's fucking, let's go.

Especially if you start shooting too much, you shoot his hat off? Like, dude, you were across the map. How did you hear me shooting across the map. That's not how sound works. You know what I love about that too? Is like the way they designed him. I like, I remember saying this boundary break video where like it's just

these um, this YouTuber who like goes into video games and he just breaks the camera away from the main character so you can see how the game loads and like yeah just and apparently in Resident Evil 2 remake Mr. X always like really genuinely physically exists in the house. Like he actually is

where he is. He doesn't like teleport unless there's like a If you shoot too much, he'll fucking show up. He's not going to take his time coming over He'll just pop up pretty close As if you're shooting like Irresponsibly too much Yeah yeah

But like for the most part He actually does wander Which is like really cool Like the fact that they even bought Because they could have easily just had him like disappear You know And just had like sound cues And just fucking you know

Just like pop them up whenever it's convenient But they actually went through the added Effort of actually making him physically exist I love that It's really cool Masterpiece That's enough for that Who makes that?

Capcom, right? Yes. Yeah. Capcom, feel free to pay us for the nice things we just said. Feel free to give us a sponsor. Please. Sponsor me personally.

Fuck you guys. Give us a copy of. Hey, fuck you, man. Give us a copy of Village and, and, yeah. I recently played seven on stream, dude. I beat that game in two sittings. Yeah, I saw you playing and I was really upset when I, when I tuned in real quick. You didn't fall.

for the trap of that big wooden thing that fucks you? Like when you were, you know, he had to get the code for that one part of the door and I was like, oh, he's gonna get fucking whacked by that fucking log or whatever. It didn't work.

I was so, hey man, you are, but it just didn't work. I was like, oh, damn it. I was pissed off and I was like, yeah. I'm a master Resident Evil player, bro. I wouldn't say that. I just know. You got, you got, you fucking walked into some

a couple of those fucking traps. I walked into some bullshit, don't get me wrong. And it was the one part in seven where you like, you put, You play as the guy that gets stuck in like that room or the Rick's cassette, and then you got to go and do the whole thing with the birthday cake and the clown and shit. I hate that.

And then I stupidly still did the thing with the quarks, so I still set myself on fire. And I was like, how dumb am I? When I just saw what happened to this guy, I did the same thing. I'm stupid. I am dumb. Yeah, I don't know. The only time I saw, I tuned into your stream and I saw you, you picked up your leg off the ground, and then you sat there and bled to death.

Like, yeah. Oh, when you're finding the dude in the, in the, uh, in that, like, in the little house. Like, that bothered me so fucking much. I was like, I just picked my leg up. That's my leg. The fucking Resident Evil games are so funny. Like, they're actually like, if you look at them purely as gameplay mechanic, heavy games, it's, it's a fucking comedy. Like, you, oh, you got to pick up your leg and reattach it.

I don't even know how to do that. I was like, what the fuck do I need to do when I was bleeding? And I was like, I don't know what this means. But I'm really excited for Village I'm very excited for Village Yeah, that map I really like Big old Pities!

Monkey Chief wrote in, he says, hey there, Twinker Bell, nice, bootlegged Mr. T, and of course, the Almighty Sweenington. What the hell is that? What does he have against us? Yeah, what the fuck, right? I float around everybody.

For the rest of your life, what the fuck is this? For the rest of your life, you are fucking. Followed by a two-foot-tall, higher-pitched version of yourself. You can't kill him, and he will always be within 30 feet of you at any given time. All this gremlin does is caused mischief and make your life more inconvenience. How do you get rid of it or cope with the situation?

P.S. you can't kill yourself. You know who you are, and I know you thought of it, don't lie. Why does this cause mischief? I definitely rip out its mandible. That's for sure. Mandible, fuck. Yeah, I ain't going to kill it, but I'm going to rip its fucking lower jaw off. and then I'm good.

It can't fucking can't talk anymore so at least we have that problem. You know what I would do? I would hold it down to the ground. I'd get a knife and I would cut one of the higher cortexes where the fucking spinal cord is

so it can't move and then I'll just put it in a box somewhere and leave it there. No, but it will, you can't use that. It still will move. It will still, like, it's not going to die. It's just going to be paralyzed.

No, no, no, but you can't paralyze it because let's say you do, the box. will move then because he will always be within 30 feet of you at any given moment So the box will drag along me, yeah I guess bring the box to me in my book bag. I always got a book bag. Oh, it's holding a two foot dead

pair, two foot, two foot tall paralyzed version of myself. You want to see it? No, but what the fuck you're talking about? I'll take it out. And it's like, look it, arms don't work. Isn't that crazy? You want to set it on fire? I don't think you'd be able to paralyze it. Why not? I'm not killing it. Paralyal paralysis in death.

No, I understand. But I don't know if you'd be able to really do that to it. It's a magical thing. I don't know. Presumably. I'd put it in concrete and I'd always have like an orb of concrete following me and I'd use that to my advantage. I'd like fucking like, I would be like, you don't want to make me angry.

And I'd walk towards somebody in a concrete or move with them and I'd act like I have telekinesis. Like I'd figure out some fuck shit. It'd be fun actually. Yeah, I don't really know how I would deal with that. If it's always causing mischief for me, I wouldn't want it to be roaming free. So I'd probably just like... Right now with Ramtruck's declaration of deals.

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Take delivery by 331. I've got Dan Morgan here on the pod. Say hi, Dan. Hey, how's it going today? It's going good, man. Tell us who you are and what you do. I'm Dan Morgan. I'm an attorney and a managing partner at Morgan and Morgan, which is America's largest injury law firm. That's pretty awesome. I think I saw Billboard of yours recently that said 20 billion one. 20 million is an insane number. Yeah, 20 billion recovered. It's actually, I think, somewhere north, probably closer to 22, 23 after this year.

And each year we get bigger and batter and our army grows. So the number will hopefully keep getting bigger and bigger as time goes on. Awesome. So how does someone get in contact with Morgan and Morgan? What would I do if I got into an accident? Probably the easiest way is dialing pound law. That's pound 529 from your cell phone. We are always open.

Our call center is always waiting to take your call. 24-7, 365. Wow. Dan Morgan. From Morgan and Morgan, America's Large Injury Law firm, thanks for coming by the show. Thanks for having me. Visit for thepeople.com for an office near you. stay home

like forever oh I know like I don't imagine how I would how you get around with it fuck that man you fucking put it that you put in a wood chipper

and then you just fucking seal it in a fucking zip lock bag and then whatever so now you just keep it by you so there's no weird magical shit happening just make sure you just carry it in your bag and it'll still be alive

but it's uh it's just there you see so me cutting it's fine and putting it in a box and bringing a bag with me he's not that bad He's going to wood chip the motherfucker. I feel like it's a little more humane to not just have it paralyzed all fucked up.

It's more humane to turn it into shreds than to paralyze it. You're trying to get on a high horse with me when you put something in a wood chipper? See, your thing probably still needs to eat. It's an agonized. Like my thing's just, it just doesn't even recognize what it is anymore. It's just fucking, it's just, it's just pixie dust or whatever. That's fine, dude. he'll be all right

he'll be all right we got it we got it we handle it next question he's fine I hope that was satisfactory monkey chief I'm Chris Reagan and I love Imagine Dragons and spurging and halo rodin

he says greetings magnificent malevolent three to add on to earlier questions who would win in a fight 30 gorillas with marine training what the fuck that wins there's nothing you could put against this that's terrifying

30 guerrillas with marine training or one covenant elite The fucking gorillas will win Dude that elite's getting beat the fuck That leads getting beat the fuck That is 30 guerrillas on their own Are already like beyond overpowered So to give them now

Fucking military schooling Marine level intelligence With their physical abilities bro And they have guns and shit No they don't know they don't even need guns Imagine a gorilla knowing how to punch And how hard it can't punch Like imagine a gorilla knowing what it's capable of

Because I feel like animals don't know what they're capable of They just know that they can do shit You know they know that they do shit But imagine a girl looking at its hand and being like Punching the ground and cracking the ground And it's like oh Oh I could really do more than this Animals for sure don't understand what they're capable of

Like for sure Like that is just definitely like a given That's just a true fact That's pretty much donkey Kong It's pretty much 30 donkey Kong I would say my only pushback is I feel like say like a cat's

a perfect example of it does that's why it doesn't extend its claws and fuck you up when it's just playing around with you well cause a defense mechanism this defense it's not so much like that's what I'm saying though but it also because like if it didn't know that

it you know because it knows to use its claws to fuck you up it knows right well these are also animals that are particularly intelligent as far as like animals go. Like a dog and a cat are like pretty... They're top tier animals. They probably have a better understanding of like what they're

capable of then like if elephants knew that they could all just jump once and destroy the planet. If they if every elephant decided let's just jump like there would be a massive problem but that's way too like... That's a big deal.

That is way to... That's a huge jump from just understanding that if I step on your face yeah thank you. I mean like Elephant understanding that if I step on you Your head will explode like a watermelon

I feel like they actually understand That's why they avoid stepping on people That's what I mean Like I think they have an understanding of like I will kill you if I Like a bear like one of those Kicking it with the Russians Where it's just like

Oh yeah let's rush If I literally use 20% of my power I will hit your head off No I have They have an understanding They have They have an understanding They have an understanding on the individual level,

but there's no, like, go fund me for elephants. You know what I mean? Like, like, elephants can't band together and understand what they are, like, as a group capable of. Yeah, so you're talking about as far as the, a guerrilla unit. Literally doing guerrilla warfare.

Yeah, like you're talking about a guerrilla messiah, pretty much. Like, I'm talking about 30 individual guerrillas in a pack. Yeah, like they... Just walking around fucking being all fucking angry, like, talking like the punisher circulates ex-marines now just understand what you do.

No, no, but listen. I don't what you say. You put, one gorilla surrounded by 30 guerrillas is ostensibly just a single gorilla around a lot of gorillas. Yeah. But the second you have 30 guerrillas as a unit, that

becomes a whole separate class of being. Like, that's a fucking, that's an anime. That's an anime right there. Of what they are, what they're capable of. I understand what you're saying. Yeah, yeah. So again, like if the elephants

decided to jump. Because by the way, we've been through this on the podcast before. I'm pretty sure that every elephant is the same one. Like, they're a hive mind. They're not. That's the nicest hive mind ever. They are. They are.

They are. They are. They are. They are. They are. Because that's what a hive mind would be. It's just a compassionate thing. Okay.

You know, it understands the goodness of all mankind. There's like, elephants never forget. They do. It's just they're all the same one. So they share the memories. So they technically don't forget, but they do forget, but they don't forget. Yeah, they can't forget because they share the same information as everyone. That makes perfect sense.

I forget shit, but I can't forget anything because if I'd forget it, one of me who was connected to me would remember it, therefore I'd remember it. Right now with Ram Trucks Declaration of Deals, Well-qualified current FCA lessees. Get a low mileage lease on the 26. Ram, 500 Big Horn crew cab, 4 by 4 for 369 a month, for 39 months. with 4,099 due at signing. Tax, title, license extra.

No security deposit required. Call 1.877 RAM, 5722 for lease details. Requires dealer contribution and lease through Stalantis Financial. Current vehicle must be registered to consumer at least 30 days prior to lease to qualify. Extra charge for miles over 32,500. Not all customers will qualify. Residency Restrictions apply. Take delivery by 331.

I've got Dan Morgan here on the pod. Say hi, hi, Dan. Hey, how's it going today? It's going good, man. Tell us who you are and what you do. I'm Dan Morgan. I'm an attorney and a managing partner at Morgan and Morgan, which is America's largest injury law firm. That's pretty awesome.

I think I saw Billboard of years recently that said 20 billion one. 20 million is an insane number. Yeah, 20 billion recovered. It's actually, I think, somewhere north, probably closer to 22, 23 after this year. And each year we get bigger and batter and our army grows. So the number will hopefully keep getting bigger and bigger as time goes on. Awesome. So how does someone get in contact with Morgan and Morgan?

What would I do if I got into an accident? Probably the easiest way is dialing pound law. That's pound 529 from your cell phone. We are always open. Our call center is always waiting to take your call. 24-7, 365. Wow. Dan Morgan.

From Morgan and Morgan, America's Large Injury Law, from thanks for coming by the show. Thanks for having me. Visit furtherpeople.com for an office near you. Cameron Meyer wrote in. Hello, racial Venniagram. If you could pick a mechanic from one game to become industry, standard, what would it be? So I don't actually

have an answer for this, but his suggestion is actually fucking awesome. For me, it would be, for me, I wish all open world games allowed you to draw on the in game map like you could in Legend of Zelda Phantom Hourglass. Simple player set markers are just too limited for what I want. I love

that. That's good. Like, if that was a thing, like you could actually like mark the map, that'd be sick. I'd love it. Oh, man. I'd like the idea of Breath of Wall anywhere on the map, anywhere on a map, can go. Like, there's no, like, game walls or anything like, like, I like the idea of, like, true

exploration. Like, Skyrim has, like, you can... It just works. Yeah. Like, Skyrim, you could have the... You could fucking Skyrim up a mountain where you could just fucking jump and press forward and jump. You pretty much hump a mount to you at the top of it. But I like Breath of the Wild's idea. Like, you can genuinely just, like, anywhere

you see on that map, you can just go to and fucking chill there. So I like that a lot. Yeah, that's cool. Yeah. That's just... That's just... I don't know if that's not a mechanic, though, is it? That's like, that's just design. Yeah. I think like, like a mechanic.

I would, you know what? I would say grappling hooks because they're all, they're all so good. Yeah, I guess. They're just so fucking good. Like, I've never used a grappling hook in a game that I didn't like. The nemesis mechanic from freaking which is a shadow of Mordor is a fantastic mechanic, dude. Oh, you're right. Yeah.

That is such a good mechanic. That is the best mechanic I think I've seen in a video game personally. They tried to copyright. Do you know that? They should have. they shouldn't because that should be in as many games as possible how like you can like how

you can choose defying people like pretty much you played in Shadow Motor how like pretty much every captain's a different character pretty much and like how they can like show up sometimes and kill other captains or they can defend you or like is it just the degree of depth

in the sense that like every person you time you kill a captain people go up in ranks people go down in ranks yeah like that's just I had one of the biggest pussies on earth become like one of the main four? Yeah, dude, I remember that in the first one. He's a bitch.

It's a good mechanic. Like, just the idea of like having like mini bosses around the environment that kind of like remember you and kind of, uh, develop a personality based on how you encounter them is really cool. But like I think, I think they tried to copyright it. I don't know if it went through or not. I think they might have done it. And there's like an argument as to whether or not that's reasonable because it seems like,

because video games are all based on like building upon. other's ideas in the first place. You obviously can't... You obviously can't build the exact same game. But even that, like, there's... You could argue that, like, what's the difference between Duke Nukem 3D and Doom, really, aside from just the tone and, you know, the art?

You know, they're pretty similar fucking games. And just because Doom invented the FPS doesn't mean that destiny shouldn't exist. That's true. And I feel the same way about the nemesis system. What convinced me of this argument, too, is you know how in a lot of the Dragon Ball Z games on PS2 they had those little mini games in the loading screens

how you could like fuck with the analog sticks and like there were like button combo mini games and stuff like that. Yeah. Do you know why that's not in any other video game? For that very reason. Because they own the copyright to mini games on loading screens. Which is insane because that seems to be like

that seems like that should just be something that everybody should be able to do if they want to. What's kind of dumb is like that would be the equivalent of trying to own Quicktime events or mini the many the that like that's that's the thing it's like arguably You know the games where quick time events are present Like they're arguably more integral to the game than mini games and loading screens are to those games So why can mini games on loading screens be copyrighted or trademarked and quick time events can that's so unfortunate It's just it's very weird I don't think you should be able to copyright those things

What makes that worse is that one whacked upon we're not even going to use it those things and where these games load so pretty fucking fast. Exactly. So we missed out of the whole time where we could have just had really cool experiences. And it would have made video games overall better because it would have been things to keep our attention from noticing how fuck things were. Yeah. That's so far. That was a, that's what I kind of liked, what was it?

Assassin's Creed, the loading screen. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Just being this like weird room and just running around just fucking around. Like I thought that was pretty cool. was like, oh, this is actually kind of keeping my attention. No, yeah.

And that was the closest that we had come outside of those Bandanamco loading screens to having like a game in the loading screen. But the reason you could only run around in like an empty space and you couldn't like do parkour was because if there was parkour in those loading screens, it would qualify as a mini-game. That's so fucking stupid. Really dumb. Really fucking stupid. And they had to like abide by the trademark.

But I remember when, I remember when Assassin's Creek came out too And I was like, this is such a cool way of like Dealing with this Because it lets you kind of practice Even in Wichel Even God of Word does it now

Or did it. What? There were no loading screens In God of War There were no loading scenes But you had the Wichicle But you had the Wichikah They pretty much like the walkway

Throughout the fucking tree Idraso Where you'd like have to run from place to place You'd go through like the fucking thing Oh yeah But that was like that was more like That was more like the mass effect elevator Where like it was just like a thing to hide the level being loaded

more than it was like a like a mini game. I feel yeah. But yeah no, I'm glad that we're at a point where like that that's kind of not going to matter anymore because shit's loading so quick. Yeah, Dylan Van Voren wrote in. Says Good Afternoon Unholy Hellspon.

If you could spend an entire day at either one of these fictional places, Jurassic Park, the Hasbin Hotel or Willie's Wonderland? Oh, that's from the Nicholas Cage movie. I haven't seen it. It's like five nights of Redis, basically. Yeah, I saw the trailer, but, yeah.

Which would you choose? Dying, killing yourself or dying by something in the world? I don't know. You know what? Maybe it has a hotel. Jurassic Park. Well, no, that's hell. That's straight up hell.

Yeah, straight up hell. You're fucked. I would, Jurassic Park is fine. The people who die in Jurassic Park are stupid. Like, I don't know. It's so easy just to avoid dinosaurs. It's so easy to avoid a dinosaur. They don't exist, duh.

What the fuck? It's so easy to avoid dinosaurs that even our most primitive line, the most primitive types of beings in our lineage were able to do it. You know? So like, so like fucking whatever, man. Shoot, uh, I'll deal with dinosaurs. That's what I'll be funny because we know somebody that work on it. So that'd be kind of weird.

Like hearing my friend's voices as demons. I'm like, oh, this is kind of strange. Oh, hey, what's up? It's Mick. Yeah, yeah, I'm no A drastic part too That's the part would be fast thing Is you'd be like wow

I get to see these I get to see a big ass Fucking brightly feathered Tyrannosaurus Rests sounding stupid We gotta gag, Gaggaggaggag My guy

Yeah I'm gonna Are you talking about the honking Are you talking about the honking Dinosaur? No, because apparently dinosaurs don't sound like

They think they Apparently dinosaurs sound different From what we think They sound like So it might have a fucking weird Fucking sound I'm just hoping

they're bullshitting because you have fucking you have crocodiles and shit that are dinosaurs and they sound ferocious. Like they sound fucking frightening. Crocodiles sound like would snakes sound like slithering and talking at the same time. What the fuck does that mean? Because crocodiles have like this weird like like you know how snakes slithering sounds

like that like a rattle like snakes have a weird slithering sound to like when they like when their tongues are out and they're like they're flicking their tongues. They have that weird sound they make now trocadows sound like that but add the large and echo that's what they sound like to me snakes making a slithering sound are you talking about when they're like when they're hissing oh so you're talking about the hissing yeah yeah like that's my brain was thinking they're making noises when they're

actually slithering i was like what the fuck are you talking about snakes snake snake snake no they're just like when they're hissing yeah you're talking about the hissing It sounds like that plus like louder and then you put like a really big echo behind it. No. But why did you call that a slithering sound? I don't know. That's what fuck me. The snakes slither.

That's what I thought. For some reason my brain was like, snakes hissing is slithering. It's just slithering with their tongue. Crocodiles, alligators, whatever, they have the capacity to make that sound. But I'm talking about their demonic growls that they have. Like just listen to that shit. It's fucking frightening. And me, I'm like, they've been around since the dinosaurs.

So I'm like, there's a possibility that dinosaurs had some fucking ferocious growls like that. You know, like, I was learning like why a crocodile is so fucking old. Because when everything died, they love eating rotten meat. So they were fine. They just ate all the dinosaurs when they were fucking rotten. So they survived. Yeah, their design's been perfected. They've been just crocodiles since like the dinosaurs around.

Isn't that terrifying? That is actually really off-putting. They've just been. crocodiles. They never had to change their build. They just shrunk. They put all their points in the twice a year and they're good. Like what the fuck is that? Imagine even like twice a year and you're good. It kind of implies that this whole planet is really just perfect for crocodiles and nothing else. Well, it implies that. So far it's been perfect for crocodiles. Well, yeah. So far as it's been like, of course. Yeah, no. But I mean, when will it not be? When the water's too hot for crocodiles to live?

down there because they're cold-blooded and stupid. Oh, it's hot, fam. It's too hot. I'm getting sick and they die. No, because we're just probably going to get sunk into some other ice age. This is just going to fucking cool the water off. And then they're going to be fine. And then they're going to have all these rotten people to fucking eat.

Like, it seems like it's a crocodile's world, man. And we're just living in it. It feels like. Where are they going to morph into fucking people? Crocodile people? Hey, how's it going? How's it going? My name is Crocodile Dave.

They don't need. They don't need it, man. They don't need that shit. They can already, they can already walk around and get their leg twisted off by their friend probably. And not complain. They don't even complain, bro. That's how you know they're fucked up.

That happened. That happened. That's it. That's it. That's such a fucking alien response as a creature. Every creature, when it's harmed, they do something. Crocad Oz is like, well, I don't have an arm now. Right now with Ram Trucks declaration of deals, well-qualified current FCA lessees,

get a low-mile lease on the 26, RAM-500 Big Horn crew cab, 4x4 for 369 a month, for 39 months, with 4,99 due at signing. Tax, title, license extra, no security deposit required. Call 1-877 RAM, 5722 for lease details. Requires dealer contribution and lease through Stalantis Financial. Current vehicle must be registered to consumer at least 30 days prior to lease to qualify. Extra charge for miles over 32,500. Not all customers will qualify. Residency Restrictions Apply. Take delivery by 331.

I've got Dan Morgan here on the pod. Say hi, Dan. Hey, how's it going today? It's going good, man. Tell us who you are and what you do. I'm Dan Morgan. I'm an attorney and a managing partner at Morgan and Morgan, which is America's largest injury law firm. That's pretty awesome. I think I saw a billboard of yours recently that said $20 billion. $1.20 billion is an insane number. Yeah, $20 billion recovered. It's actually, I think, somewhere north, probably closer to $20,000. 23 after this year. And each year we get bigger and badder and our army grows. So the number will

hopefully keep getting bigger and bigger as time goes on. Awesome. So how does someone get in contact with Morgan and Morgan? What would I do if I got into an accident? Probably the easiest way is dialing pound law. That's pound 529 from your cell phone. We are always open. Our call center is always waiting to take your call. 24-7-365. Wow. Dan Morgan. From Morgan and Morgan, America's Large Injury Law, thanks for coming by the show. Thanks for having me. for an office near you. I will continue. It's like, yeah, no, all right, well, I'll keep going.

It's so scary, man. There's something about, like, just the lack of love feeling in a crocodile's eyes. Just rip reptiles in general, man. It's just, they're so, like, there's certain lizards that look so pissed off. Like, they look so angry, but you can't tell what they're feeling. Yeah, but some of them. I'm glad Yeah

Well no Like geckos Geckles are adorable Like for example Are geckos lizards Are geckos reptiles? Or are they like amphibians? I don't think they're amphibians

But I could be totally wrong Yeah look it up Because I could be totally wrong I thought I think I know salamanders are amphibious Salamanders are definitely amphibious Because they starve as tadpoles Oh okay

So a gecko is a reptile And a salamander is an amphibian Yeah because they definitely They're tadpoles when they start off and then they develop, yeah. But, like, geckos look adorable as shit. But then you look at, say, for example... Monitors, land monitors, whatever it is.

Well, yeah, those beasts, but I'm talking about, like, just even, like, camillians. They look like the most bored. Like, they look so they hate everything. Like, look at their expression. Communions just look like they fucking, they're like, I don't want to be here.

Don't fucking touch me. Apparently, camillians are affectionate, though. I heard that. Apparently they're, like, affectionate animals. Like, they just go on your shoulder, and they just chill on your shoulder. your shoulder and they'll be they'll defend you bro like they won't let anything get near you i've i've actually like when i was a kid i really wanted a chameleon because i i thought they were just so cool and just

the fact that you can just have one perched on your shoulder and it would just like eat bugs that would like come near you to bother you i just always thought that was just like the coolest possible thing to have that's pretty bad you know more than like a car and what it is it's the big eyes that's completely uh and that's covering just the part where they can see it just makes them look And they're looking up and down and side and shit like that and they look all around. They're like, they're like, fuck off,

but like they're pretty cool. Yeah, they got the little, uh, fucking Lego hands too. They do. Yeah, those things are fucking weird,

bro. Like how they, especially give them a stick and they just like, fucking just like, I don't know, it's like their, their hands are completely designed to like, I don't even know.

Hold on. It's meant to hold on. Yeah. They're just, they're actually, they're, they're just fucking action figures basically. Like, you just, you, seriously, like, you hand, if you hand, like, I saw these videos on Vine or, like, TikTok or somewhere where people were just handing chameleons various things and they just, they pick them up every time.

They just clamp around and there's just like a little, there's this video of this little chameleon waving a sword around. A knife, yeah. It's the funny. Yeah. That's the fucking cool. You ever seen a chameleon in real time, a fucking camouflage? Yeah, absolutely. That shit is puzzling, bro.

That shit puzzles my eight brain. I'm like, whoa. Like, that's the stuff, that's the stuff that where I'm like, all right, man, maybe we can talk a little bit about intelligent design because that's just some fucking wild shit. Because I'm just like, that's so impressive to just be like, I'm going to be by something and I'm going to look like it. Dude, you know what's even crazier? Why, where's our time to do? Why don't we have this cool shit? What's even nuttier is that apparently, like, chameleons have, like, low grade, like, cuttlefish and, like, octopuses can change the texture of their skin.

That is the most insane shit. That's some shit that's like a fucking person as a superhero, like making their costume appear on their body. It's like, how the fuck did you do that? Like, what does that mean? That is actually disgusting. Like, the whole texture change thing. That is shit that I can't abide by that.

That's just not okay with me. Why don't we, why are we so inefficient? Because we're smart. Why don't we have sweet skin? Why don't we have bear claws? Why can't we camouflage? Why can we jump fucking over a building? Like there's so many things like a kangaroo a kangaroo can jump

A bear will swipe you A bear will fucking hot knife through butter By just accidentally passing by you Will fucking slice their head off And like we can't do anything We're smart bro We can just think hard We got we made guns

We made guns But at no point where we even like Even like say Neanderthal Like or anything like that They were just ugly No dude neanderthals were strong as shit dude They were strong Comedically so

They were strong compared to humans, but still, you can get like fucking whatever the hell a mammoth to just fucking tusk you in the ass. You know what's crazier too? Apparently those were smarter than people, so smarter than regular homo, like regular, like homo sapiens. Which is insane. They were smarter. That doesn't sound real. We just built tools faster. Not, I'm looking up, dude. We just built tools faster because we needed them more than they did. And then we had tools when they didn't have tools. Well, that's actually, that argument actually does hold up just why, like, because when all these, when all these racists we're talking about, like, different, oh, how come, how come dark people don't build as much? And I'm like, are you, are you, are you stupid?

If you don't need anything, there's no point of building shit. That's true. Like, if you live close to the equator, you can chill naked and you're good. Yeah, it's why, it's why in sci-fi, all the, all the highly advanced aliens are usually, like, feeble, gray-headed aliens. who were just like really fucking feeble and weak. Yeah. Yeah. You could kick a Mars attacks alien in the head probably once, you know?

You could probably put your hands. The freaking boxer did it. The boxer beat up a fucking army of them. He beat an army of aliens up, and he showed up later on in the movie because he fucked up a fucking small platoon of them with his hands. That movie is so good.

I love Mars a guy. It's a great movie. It's a great movie. It's been a while since I've seen it, though. I got to watch it. We recently watched it. I saw it recently. It was the last movie I watched in L.A.

before I left. Oh, nice. And it's just so fucking good. But, yeah, I don't even remember what the fucking question was. Yeah, I don't either. I hope whatever that, I hope, I hope we have some answer for you. Evolution. Evolution.

Buttered buttered butter wrote in. He says, hey, you three short-bust chauffeurs. Shofers, short-bus chauffeur. That's a really hard thing to say for some reason. Who do you think would win in a fight? a football team comprised entirely of midgets or a monkey with a gun who figured out how to use it. To avoid...

Wait, to avoid any rules lawyering. Right now with Ram Trucks Declaration of Deals, Well-Qaeda lessees, get a low mileage lease on the 26. Ram, 500 Big Horn crew cab, 4 by 4 for 369 a month for 39 months with 4,09 due at signing. Tax, title, license extra,

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which is America's largest injury law firm that's pretty awesome I think I saw billboarded years recently. It said 20 billion one. 20 million is an insane number. Yeah, 20 billion recovered. It's actually, I think, somewhere north, probably closer to 22, 23 after this year. And each year we get bigger and batter and our army grows. So the number will hopefully keep getting bigger and bigger as time goes on. Awesome. So how does someone get in contact with Morgan and Morgan? What would I do if I got into an accident? Probably the easiest way is dialing pound law. That's pound 529 from your cell phone. We are always open. Our call center is always waiting to take your call. 24-7, 365. Wow. Dan Morgan. From Morgan and Morgan, America's Large Injury Lawfram, thanks for coming by the show.

Thanks for having me. Visit for thepeople.com for an office near you. The gun is a Glock 19 and they are on a football field. Love the podcast. Hope you all stay saying in the final stretch of COVID. Yeah, final stretch we'll see. The football team would win. If it's just a Glock. If the monkey knows how to, look, look, monkeys, Perception is a comedically level enhanced from humans, which is true. They are faster than we are in bursts. If a football team is how many people's on the field at a time football team?

It's like 10, right? It's like 10 or 11 on the field. 11. 11 on the field, right? Glock 19 could hold down how many bullets. Like extended mag is like 16, I think, right? Well, that thing that's a regular. Well, I think extended would be a lot more.

Well, you can't have a monkey with a Glock and not have enough bullets to be able to kill them, you know? That's just not fair. but a monkey could easily rip a fucking midget in half like dismantle them but it's just using the gun though correct like it's not about like tearing it up I don't

I don't know this my whole thing is just knowing how you can you can use several bullets to take down one person right sometimes it takes several so like a lot of times there's people that have been shot point Blake in the face and they survive

so the idea of having just one mag. Let's see, what is a Glock 19? Let's see it. A bullet could definitely put you down with a Glock 19. So it has, yeah, so it's regular, 15 rounds. Oh, yeah, it could do it.

So it's possible. But let's see, let's see, Pistol can also use magazines 17, 19, and 33 rounds. God damn. So you can get extended mag up to 33, though. Now, if it has the extent, he didn't say extended mag, though. He didn't say the extend, though, yeah.

No, he did not say extended mag. I would definitely be that the monkey has a lot more shots because even people that are just sharpshooters, you get a really good shot. And the bullet, depending on what kind of bullet it is, it could just pass through you and not hitting you by organs. If you have, like, say, hollow point, it could do a hell of a lot more damage. So maybe it would be better off. But we don't know. We didn't. Let's just say that they're not hollow point.

And it's just a regular mag. I think the football team wins. Yeah. There's just numbers Like I know none of them None of them are catching the monkey None of them are going to be able to restrain the monkey But I've also seen some pretty strong

Like muscular small people I No no no no they're not They're not They're not Because a chimpanzee is comedically strong Yeah but that's an ape So what kind of a monkey

Yeah yeah we're talking about a monkey Okay never mind If not If not yeah Never mind it's a monkey Yeah the monkey's dead I think Yeah If it was an ape they'd be different

Ape could probably take them out. If it was, and here's the thing, here's the thing, too. Here's the thing. Here's what you have to consider. This is a football team comprised of little people. Presumably, he wouldn't have said football team if it meant that they wouldn't be in gear. That's true. That's what I'm thinking of.

So these are people, these are small, little people in fucking proper football gear. They got helmets. They got pads. They're in an open field where a monkey has like no advantage. Like, if we were in like a forest, I would say it would be a lot, it would be a lot weirder. It would be, okay, that's up in the air a little bit. The monkey's got some high ground, you know. But in a football, like a football field, I'm sorry, the monkey's dead.

The monkeys, the monkeys, the monkeys. Yeah, they have home field advantage. Could you imagine seeing a chimpanzee throw a punch proper? Like, and it realizing it threw a proper punch, like, it cocks back, and it punches someone that it looks at its hand and it's like, I think rocks. I think that in zoos, they should have shock. collars around all of the monkeys to prevent them from looking at their palms for too long. I disagree, but they should have something to change their perspective.

Like, real quick, that happens. Oh, feeding time. And the monkey's like, oh, you're feeding time. And then one of the monkeys still looking at its hands. They should not be allowed to stare at their palms for too long because that is the universal sign of understanding what you are. That is like in every bit of, every anime, every movie, every superhero movie where like Peter Parker throws his first punch and it.

throws a high school student across the across the fucking room. It's always like, he's like, whoa. It's always this. It's always looking right down at your head. And like,

if you see an ape, a chimp, a gorria, a gorilla. You see one of those things looking down at its palms. For any, for any longer,

any longer than five seconds, shock immediately. You can't let it get that far. Shock it. Shock it. Shock it takes unconscious. Shoot it. Put it in a stew.

It's dumb. It's, Shock it until it's unconscious. It forget the moment. I want to see a gorilla flexing in the mirror. I want to see that. I want to see that. And it's like, oh, my God, it knows.

And then you fucking... Then you fucking hand it like a fucking 100 pound dumbbell and see what it does. Hurls it. It just starts like... This starts like fucking understanding, starts curling. And then fucking after a week it comes back and realizes how light it is. And now it's looking at you like, you know, like... It understands.

More weight. More weight. I need more. More heavy weight. I need heavy weight. Heavy. Heavier. You get it a whole fucking home gym.

It starts squatting and shit. And then for some reason, it's mind gets to the point where it wants you to shave it. So we can see its muscles better. It's like, please fucking, it just gets something sharp. And it's like fucking like making the cutting. Like, please shave me so I can see how I love. look, and it wants to compete at Mr. Olympia. And then it wins, and it goes, and it shoves someone out the room.

It shoves someone out the room. It just, the runner up. It just kills the runner up. It picks him up and throws him. Fucking Kai Green gets picked up and fucking furled out the window. Just fucking suplexed into the ground where he fucking just splats. Could you imagine how dangerous it would be if you just showed a fucking gorilla, fucking luchador fights.

Like every day you just show it luchador fights and eventually it goes out there and it fucking does a 619 to another fucking gorilla and kicks its head off its neck. Oh my God, dude. That's amazing. I hope technology and science figures this shit out. I really hope we get to that point.

Yeah. Did you guys see that this entirely, this is not undocumented at all. This is something I just found. Okay. Did you see that, what is it, Milo Yanopoulos is ex-gay? Who? No, that you're lying.

I'm not getting life sight. We're fucking lying. Activist Milo Yenobloos is now ex-gay consecrating his life to St. Joseph. No! Who's Milo? Miloianoblus was this gay conservative from like several years ago. No, you're kidding. Dude, he had a, look, it bleep this out if you want.

He had a comedy. tour, a show tour that was called Dangerous Faggot. Yeah. That was this guy. He was a provocateur, conservative, gay, and proud. He was also married to a black dude to really kind of be like, I'm Jewish. I'm Jewish descent. I'm ethically Jewish.

I'm Catholic. And I married a black dude. Like, stop calling me a Nazi. That was his thing. Yeah. And he was just like, oh, look at me. But he's, this is a headline that I just saw. I don't know if it's real.

but it's a funny one and I had to mention it. I don't even know who this person is. I'm not in the question. It's fine. You didn't miss out much. But we're pretty much at the end here. Just about. We got some more questions, but we'll save those for next week.

Remember, you can always ask us questions on the Patreon at patreon.com slash the snark tank. And, you know, if you like what you heard today, consider supporting us over there. And, you know, the perks are pretty simple. One dollar a month gets you early access to every episode. $5 gets you your question. read on the show. $10 gets you access to our Discord server

that is one-time $10 and you're there forever. And $25 gets your name dyslexically red at the end of the show. We also have snarktankmerch.com if you want to check that out. But now is the time

as every episode usheres us into the ending portion where I read all of your terrible names. So count me down. Three. Gorilla. Two. One.

Correla. Pree-Raz, a tiny Asian man, Parker Luchenbach, cum man, the man of come. Blake 896, Pinyap Vivo, the epic Oshawat, designated divorce paper delivery dude, silly putty eater, in the name of the dyslexic wombat, the big peen, and the holy sween. O.G. two-tone, Crenshaw Mafia Blood. No, I feel like I just said something like that. Oh, shit. That's pretty, yeah. Yeah.

What is that? I feel like that's a gang. I mean, I don't know exactly. Yeah, you got bloods over here on Crenshaw. Fucking right, kind of in my backyard. Oh, shit. All right. That's unsettling.

Ace man. Uh, fucking kill me. Every time Chris says subscribe to Dr. Purple on YouTube, I pee a little. The podcast was canceled because Chris finally said the N-word and Sweeney still wants to clap Candice Owen's cheeks.

I don't want to. I got a good look at her dog. She's not the optimal. She's not optimal. I mean, it's not the optimal. Like, I mean, why not? She's all right, but, you know, her face a little busted,

and I'll be honest. Holman Brown 98. Diego Andres Hernandez. Hey, boss, can you follow me on Twitter, please? Ryan Luchesse, abs are the sexiest part of a tomboy, sloshy scout, Atrosone, Hadeo Kojima screaming the N-word at the top of his lungs while promoting his next video game. That's so fucking hilarious, dude.

I would buy that shit so quick, dude. I'd buy it in a heartbeat. Tom Sweeney, the natrocious alien fucker. Please check out my podcast called How to We Even Get Here Every Thursday. Leroy Jenkins, Kingston Kicking Kids. I'm not reading off the nameless anymore. This is a bit of a tangent, but I do like eating out of a bowl on the ground. The ADHD Tank Podcast, Hard Hat Skyd Skydiver, Chris Chandler.

Chris has a high voice for a lesbian. Absolute wagon. Lord Gavin. The name, what? The name you would give to a zip-popping fetish. Huh. That's pretty... What is a name that you would give to it?

There's got to be videos on that already, right? Mushy nigger. I don't know. Yabba-dabba domestic abuse. I was cock blocked by a turtle. Alaskan oil field trash. Chris would be a twink if he was raised upstate. Lieutenant Lipton's famous T-Bex patient.

Not an FBI agent. Not an FBI agent, Juan Punchman, Marcus Shorten, Mr. Fuck, Jim Crow's daddy issues, Aboosy. Chris promised to drop Tom's nudes at 10K, Papa Nurgel Governor Arnold Schwartz and N-word You look so discreet

You look so sweaty You look so sweaty You're like your sweaty You're like your sweaty You're like a sweet cheese It looks so bad Hey I can't even see him I just look like fucking

You look like chicken man What the fuck chicken I've just been taking My super male vitality That's all my Palm Joseph Watson Danny DeVito's perfectly Preserved penis

I let Paul touch me Murder Ascend David Connolly, the dyslexic that feels Chris's pain. I'm Chris Reagan, and I love Imagine Dragons and Sprinting in Halo. Lobotomized Jesus is my drooling divine savior. Haco, Moto Zealot. Hey, you, you're finally awake. You were trying to cross the border, right?

Walked into that imperial ambush, same as us. Hiroshima's spicy mushrooms. For some reason, I always forget about that one. Yeah, same. Same. Then it happens, and I'm like, oh, yeah. Adam Carolla, sipping cola, sniffing yolas, bang and cholas and shanting yolo. Derek's unyielding sex drive

Dummy Thick Dave Heartless Wretch aka the black man from Staten Island Uncle Tony's Pizza Reann Abortion Clinic where today's loss is tomorrow sauce Dan Schneider the Hyman Divider Badly Brave Jolly old dipshit

Huggard Derek the movie theater assistant manager Ethereum Mrs. Butterut McWamacunt Chris Gate my progerian hunting ass Deflated left ass cheek All Hands on Dick Arrow Sunny with a chance The episode of Stark Tank I showed my parents starting with

Sween and Derek yelling the N-word And now I'm out of the will thanks Nice No problem, man. Richter 86. I think I said Sunny Chance already, but in case I didn't, I'll say it again. And as always, rounding out the list. The chosen one.

The chosen one. King of Hapazid. And that'll be it. This episode will be out because there are 49 backups of my audio now. So we're all set. I've come so come. I can feel you come. Inside my cum so much more than come.

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