The Snark Tank - #62: The Grammys Still Happen?

Episode Date: March 19, 2021

Why does Beyonce ruin everything? How did Chris Daughtry not win an award? Is Taylor Swift over-appreciated? Who cancelled Pepe Le Pew? Does Islam have a point about the West? Is WAP DESTROYING CULTURE? All this and more on this episode of the fucking podcast you listen to. Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

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Dom! D'am! Snake was like, Zelda! Where do we go, Zelda? Dada! And then Zelda was like, and then Legend of Zelda said, my name,

I got even finished. Oh my God. I got even finished. Dude, is that fucking, yo, my favorite character is Halo, dude. Yo, my favorite character, Legend of Zelda. What's going on, man?

Oh, is that God of war? God of war said, Dom. Hey, everybody, welcome. Welcome to the Snark Tank podcast. It's me, Chris Reagan. I'm here with some black guy and Tom Sweeney. You know, it's Christmas time. And it's a season for giving.

It's, what is it, March 15th? This is the day that, Mr. Crocker is really mean to his students. Today is also the anniversary of the release to Pippa Butterfly. Is it really? So shout out to the best hip-hop album ever made. Arguably the best album in music history ever made. Yes.

Little Romeo. Hell, you should be strung up. If a bunch of clan, if the lights in your room turned off and then a bunch of clamming appeared behind you, I'd be like, well, good for you. You deserve this. That's the album, right? It's like, hey, oh.

Watch it flow. It's time. The Pimp a Butterfly's A Pimper Butterfly's show Hey everybody It's a podcast It's comedy sometimes But mostly we like to think of this as an educational show

Where you can come To learn everything that you need to know About everything that's going on They can educate this dick Okay For instance The Grammys happened And I didn't watch a damn

I didn't watch anything of it because I didn't know they still did that. I sincerely haven't heard about the Grammys in like five years. I didn't know. I just sincerely forgot that this still happened. Let me replay the same people win. Like, who gives the shit? It's the same people.

They always win. No, this year was quite a few different people, dude. I bet Daughtry swept like every year. If you think Daughtry's still around, you need to talk to somebody. Yeah, the-Duchy's been gone for a while, dude. Part six, it's not over. That's, that's, he, he's, he's. remixing it like fucking Old Town Road.

It's pretty good. Chris Daughtry hasn't been around since we've been adults legally. That's not true. He was in that Bionicles movie in 2007. We were not legally adults yet. Is that real? Whoops. I thought I was.

Is that real or are you just saying shit? No, no, that's real. That's real. He did a song called Crash for a Bionicle movie in 2007. I only know this, by the way, because I was scrolling through Twitter today. and there was this thing this is actually a great segue into a conversation that I actually forgot to write in the document

but I thought it was kind of amusing I don't know if you guys are familiar but there's been this kind of like generation thing going on on like TikTok where it's like millennials versus Gen Z or whatever I don't really care about it but today Fox News was trending because they were like cancel culture has run amok and we are calling on Gen X

to save us from cancel culture and it was was about like Mr. Potato Head and fucking Pepe Lapeueu and all the other shit. All the shit that we talked about last time. But it's this weird, I retweeted it. And, but it's this weird Foxy's saying. We're calling on Gen X to help us, save us from this cancel culture. Run amok.

Can they do it? And then there's this wide shot of this like photoshopped banner of the word canceled over all of these cartoon characters. And for some reason, Chris Daughtry is playing like loudly. And I just remember listening to this. I'm like, and I thought like, why are they blasting something that sounds like Chris Daughtry over this cancel culture news piece in 2021? And somebody was like, no, that actually is Chris Daughtry.

And I was like, oh. And then so people were like linking a bunch of like random Chris Daughtry shit. And I saw this Bionicles movie from like 2007 that he apparently did a song for. That is so weird. Yeah. I forgot that Bionicles even had movies. Like, I totally forgot that that was the thing. Was it like one of those hits that?

Because he had like two hits. Yeah. Was it one of those songs? He has, it's not over and I'm going home. Oh, wait. Which one's that? I actually don't know that. You know, I'm going home.

I'm going home. Oh, wow, I'm low. Well, love is always been there for me. Okay. Excuse me. He has three hits because he has, uh, uh, what about now? And these faces and these racists are getting old. Somehow you're naked and some shit.

Like, you don't remember that one? No. What if I love? It's not over. I didn't, I didn't download that much Chris Daughtry to my Zen media player. I only had. Zay had the first three albums. Anything after that.

That alluding me. Yo, you know what I was thinking of earlier today? I was thinking, like, isn't it amazing how Clay Aiken just exists squarely in the first year you heard about him and never a year after or before? Who's Clay Aiken? Yeah. Exactly. He was the guy. Was he gay?

Was he gay and he was on American Idol? Yeah. And he was really skinny. And it was him versus Ruben Stuttered. Ruben could sing his ass off, bro. And Ruben stuttered. He made one song called Sorry, 2004. Then he died.

Then he died, right? I mean... Didn't he died? Didn't he actually pass away? No, he didn't. Crazy. He just, he's, his music died. That's all.

You're thinking of Cedric the entertainer, I think. Seedinternetian is not dead. Wait, who's the one who's dead? Bernie Mac? No, Patrice O'Neill. Patrice O'Neill. Maybe you're thinking of him. Maybe you're thinking of Patriceo O'Neill.

He's dead as shit. He's dead. I fucking love that, dude. Okay. He's almost his dead as Dr. Drew. Look. Dude, he was like the best, but the most fucked up comedian out there. He was such a piece of shit, but he was so great.

Okay, so guys, the Grammys. And the Grammys, what happened as usual is Taylor Swift won for no good reason, like usual. She's just optimized being a white woman in music. She has just put all the proper stats in the proper things. I'm the victim. I have blue eyes. I sing folk folk pop music She just tall as fuck

She just She's got all the she ticks all the shit And maximized it to the point that now It's pretty much If she quefs into a microphone They'll give her a fucking Grammy Yeah She

I'll be honest Well let me not even let me Let me even let me honest Does she to you guys Does she have any hits Like anything like oh this is a big song I think 1989 is a good album actually Truth be told

I think it's not a bad album But it's not a bad album But it's not a bad album But it's It's not better than Tipa Bipa Butterfly. And she beat that album. Come on, man. She beat that album.

She got over how many years she beat that album? And I was like, no way. Everybody says, and it's true. All of those, the major award shows are all, they're all fucking fixed. There's a committee of people that vote for it. And it's all political. It doesn't have to do with fucking, like, talent and merits and shit like that. Because, I mean, come on.

Like, I just saw an example that the weekend wasn't nominated for shit. And it's like, this guy, didn't this guy just sing at the Super Bowl? Like, isn't he, isn't some of his songs like he's like one of the sole reasons 80s fucking shit's coming back? Is, what was Blinding Lights this year, though? Was that the, for the year that they're awarding? Because this is 2020s, right? Blinding Lights came out was played in 2020. It came on in 2020 from my mistake.

I think that whole album. The song might have come up before that, but the album itself came out in 2020. That's kind of insane that he didn't win then because that's just an. objectively really good song. Yeah. It's, and it kind of shows you that. And he says,

he's like, fuck this, I'm boycott this bullshit. Um, which rightfully so because it's, it's weird. It's, come on.

I, I just, I'm not even a Taylor Swift hate or something. I just, I don't personally, I don't think any of her, none of her shit like does anything to me. Like when I hear it,

it's not for you, Derek. It's not for you. It's for the girls that feel like they have no voice. Look, let me say this. Let me say this. But even for the,

things that are not for you, you can kind of tell. Like, like, I don't know. I don't see anything in Taylor Swift either. Like, I can see, like, all right, I don't really like Ariana Grande either, but it's like, all right, whatever. Like, I get it, I guess. Arianna Grande has some fucking hits, man. I don't like Ariana's music that much.

I think, I think she has some hits. I've heard some shit and I was like, oh, I didn't know that was her. That was actually, it was pretty good. Yeah, I mean, I don't disagree. I feel like I always definitely know it's her. It's like, oh, this is definitely around. I just don't know that much, I guess. Success starts with your drive,

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I've got Dan Morgan here on the pod. Say hi, Dan. Hey, how's it going today? It's going good, man. Tell us who you are and what you do. I'm Dan Morgan. I'm an attorney and a managing partner at Morgan and Morgan, which is America's largest injury law firm. That's pretty awesome. I think I saw billboard of years recently that said $20 billion. $20 billion is an insane number. Yeah, $20 billion recovered. It's actually, I think, somewhere north, probably closer to 22, 23 after this year. And each year we get bigger and batter and our army grows.

So the number will hopefully keep getting bigger and bigger as time goes on. Awesome. So how does someone get in contact with Morgan and Morgan? What would I do if I got into an accident? Probably the easiest way is dialing pound law. That's pound 529 from your cell phone. We are always open. Our call center is always waiting to take your call.

24-7, 365. Wow. Dan Morgan. From Morgan and Morgan, America's Large Injury Law, and thanks for coming by the show. Thanks for having me. Visit furtherpeople.com for an office near you. I think she has probably the best voice

and one of the best voices of music. She's her fucking her pipes are kind of unmatchable. There's a lot of people that can't hit notes like her. That's true. That's true. Yeah, she did that one high note, the meme high note, right? That was like breaking everybody's. I think I saw a lot of like TikToks.

It was what you call it's note. It was Mariah Carey's note, but then she could also do it. right right right right okay yeah that's what is impressive none of like you can't then that's impressive like yeah yeah you can't get that high it's so crazy I can't hit that note you know you don't have a high voice Chris I guess it's like if if if you kick me square in the testicles maybe I could no I would just whimper I would squeak I wouldn't even get that note out I yeah I can't even there you go I wish I wish I wish I get a thing like that yet

How did they even do the Grammys, though? Like, do they just, like, did they scream? Really? Wait, so they had people in person, but just with masks? Yeah. Yeah. I saw people bitching about that. And I saw a lot of pictures and shit, and they weren't fucking wearing masks at all. They're just chilling and shit.

Like, what up? Record of the year. Record of the year went to everything I wanted by Billy Eilish. I think Billy O'Sh is an extraordinarily boring artist personally. That's me because she just kind of rhythmically talks. Like, she kind of does what Drake does, but like in a different genre. And I'm like, you know what? Let the, let the black nail polish wearing kids have their Billy Ilish.

I'm going to let them be. But she went for record a year. Album year went to Taylor Swift Folklore because it just always goes to her. Song of the year goes to I can't breathe. I don't know who that is. Well, that's an easy reason why I went to that song. It's pretty obvious. Wait, why?

What? Um, I don't get it. I'm not going to explain. It's a song about George Floyd, right? I'd assume it would be. George Floyd sang? You're so disrespectful. You're so disrespectful.

You're so disrespectful. Like, you're this a piece of shit. Okay. Hey, we've said some pretty disrespectful shit about Kobe when he was still fucking warm. I did not say it. You two might have said that. I didn't say anything. Kobe's my hero.

I don't even who Kobe is. Is that the energy drink? You see, this fucking, you are, your, your heart is a derelict. Yeah. Your heart is derelict. We got Best New Artist's Megan the Stallion, but yeah, she was all over the place. The best pop solo was Harry Styles, the watermelon sugar, sugar, shigin. Oh, God.

The best pop duo was Rain on Me by Lady Gaga and a Grande. That's crazy because, I mean, I don't think that's a very good Gaga song, but it's Gaga in general, so that's pretty good. Yeah, I don't like that song I don't care for that song But that is a pretty good team up Best traditional Pop vocal album was American Standards James Taylor

I don't know who to fuck that Like I actually have no clue that is I don't know what this shit is man There's the best pop vocals was do a lupa With what you call the future nostalgia I actually know who that is For me The only few

The only few I cared about Was the fact that dance electronic and Best Dance Electronic album went to Ketranata, who was a person that I love, an artist I fucking adore. Freakada for 10% and Bubba, his album. But I don't understand because, like,

I'm not hearing Chris Daughtry, like, at all here. I don't know, because Chris Daughty hasn't been mentioned. Like, I don't know what's going on. It seems, it seems, it seems, it seems completely implausible that Chris Daughtry wouldn't win a grand, me in 2021. Like that seems incomprehensible

today. Derek, do you know about a He had that fucking hit dude. Come on. He had that hit Marcus and Dom.

Don. Derek, do you know of a group name what you call a body count? Of course. Yeah,

they had the best metal up performance. They fucking won. Body count won. Yeah. Holy shit. Dude, that's our boy.

Who? That's our boy. Dude, body count is, I got news for you. He's the singer. Really? That's awesome.

Yeah. Ice-T's in a metal band. A body count. For reason a metal band, no cap? That's hilarious. So Ice-T's always been like, you know, back in the day, his homies, basically how it got started that one of his homies wanted to play guitar.

And he's like, I just want to play guitar. And then they started listening like Slayer and shit in the thrash that was around. Like say the big thrash metal bands in the 80s. And then they started making some shit. And then fucking decades later, they got back together. And they actually, I was like, wait, this is actually good. It's hilarious. I wasn't expecting it to be good.

I was just going to be stupid. Iste's old as shit. All of his homies are old, but they're like, oh, I can't hate. I think the best metal performance should go. Oh, by the way, ICT is also in Gears of War along with Marcus and Dom. He's the one that says Marcus. No, I'm not even, this is not like, I'm saying something objectively false as a joke.

Like he actually is like Icy is for real in Gears of War III as like a proper character. I don't believe you. Like act like I swear to you. I swear body count even I think does the credits for Gears of War III. I'm not I'm not. I swear to God I'm not kidding. You might be. I'm sure you're right in which is kind of hilarious.

I just can't think of if I just can't think of it. I'll tell you the funniest. I'll tell you the funniest. it happened. Beyonce knows daughter, Blue Ivy, got a Grammy. For what? In cooperation with her mother, I think, for brown skin girl, if I'm not mistaken. Success starts with your drive, and American Public University is here to fuel it.

With affordable tuition and over 200 flexible online programs, APU helps you gain the skills and confidence to move forward. Whether you're changing careers, starting fresh, or pursuing a lifelong passion, Our programs are designed for people who never stop. You bring the fire, APU will fuel the journey. Learn more at APU.APUS.edu. I've got Dan Morgan here on the pod. Say hi, Dan.

Hey, how's it going today? It's going good, man. Tell us who you are and what you do. I'm Dan Morgan. I'm an attorney and a managing partner at Morgan and Morgan, which is America's largest injury law firm. That's pretty awesome. I think I saw Billboard of yours recently

that said 20 billion one. 20 billion is an insane number. Yeah, 20 billion recovered. It's actually, I think, somewhere north, probably closer to 22, 23 after this year. And each year we get bigger and badder, and our army grows. So the number will hopefully keep getting bigger and bigger

as time goes on. Awesome. So how does someone get in contact with Morgan and Morgan? What would I do if I got into an accident? Probably the easiest way is dialing pound law. That's pound 529 from your cell phone. We are always open. Our call center is always waiting to take your call.

24 7, 365. Wow. Dan Morgan. From Morgan and Morgan, America's Large Injury Law from, thanks for coming by the show. Thanks for having me. Visit furtherpeople.com for an office near you.

What? I don't know. Did she sing? She sang in the song, but she wasn't like singing like a singer. He was a little kid that was in the song that had a few lines, and they got a Grammy for it,

for my mistaken. So, yeah, she's a Grammy. Beyonce is like Taylor Swift to me, I just don't understand. I don't fucking get it. I understand Beyonce's talent, but not most of her songs. I do like that visual album. I think it's a very nice visual album,

but like her talent is notable. Beyonce can sing her ass off. Beyonce can sing. There's plenty of singers. But she can sing, dog. She can sing very well, dude. You got to be real. Yeah, but she's a very good singer.

She can't write, though. She can't write. I agree. I don't think she makes the best music. Look, man, the songs that are chosen for her or that she chooses what I mean, I just, I don't, like, I remember the melody of Destiny's Child, and she's put out nothing like that. Well, she's not Destiny Child, though.

She's a member of it. I know she's not Destiny's Child, but my whole point is she would, the shit that they were doing in Destiny's Child was so much better. Like, other people may disagree just like the, the, what was, what's the ring on it thing? If you like it, I hate that song. Single ladies? It's. I don't hate that. I don't hate that song, but I don't think it's amazing, but I don't hate it.

It's so fucking generic, nothing to me. Beyonce on her own is not as good as Beyonce in Destiny's Child. They're like an organism. They're like an organism. And the second you remove something, it's like, they're like Exodia. You know, it's like you can't really, you can get by with like the left testicle of Exotica. But you really need the whole, you know. I don't know, dude.

Look, look, I'm not saying I love. You're going to stare me right in the ass and tell me that that's not true. I'm not staring at all. But I'm going to be real with you. I don't particularly like Beyonce knows that much simply as an artist herself. I can admit that she has the pipes to sing her ass off. I admit she has really good performances. But I don't think she makes, her songs are not the best.

Like I think surfboard or whatever, which was all night, I hate that song, bro. People, it's like, baby, all night. Whoa! I've never even heard this song. I listen to that song and you'll want to die. I hate that song. But I do think she has made, like, Lemonade was a good album.

I think her album right before that was a pretty good album. I don't think that she, I don't think her songs are as catchy as maybe they were when she was part of the whole group of Destiny's Child. I don't like them quite as much But I didn't love Destiny's Child either That's the thing I didn't adore them as well Destiny's Child was way more Way more of an iconic sound to me

Than any Beyonce song has ever been I think it's I also just don't like Beyonce Because she ruined the search The SEO for fucking Halo Ruined it destroyed it Also Just the fact The fact also that

Dude I think when I saw the Lion King Is when it clicked for me that I'm like, oh, I hate the way she sings because she sings like somebody trying really hard on American Idol. She does the whole, like, look at how, look at all the vibrato I can do. Look at how much I can waver my voice in a single note. And it's like, just sing the fucking song, dude. Just, you don't need to sing it like you're trying to mimic an old man's heart erratically exploding on his deathbed. You can just sing the fucking note, dude.

Just do it. She does sing to outperform people. She does do that. She did that the whole time in Lion King. She just sang to outperform Donald Glover. She ruined every song she was on. It was like every song that Beyonce did on the Lion King was the worst one. It's honestly, it's even worse than the fucking, than what is it?

What they did with Be Prepared where fucking that dude. So monotone singing. Where he just talked over the fucking half of the. the melody. It's, I don't know, man. Like, Beyonce is, like, wildly just, just overrated to me. But Donald Glover killed it in Lion King, though.

He sang, he sang amazingly in that movie. He's fantastic. I love him. I love him. Yeah, he did fine. I mean, that movie sucks. He's a good artist. He's a good artist.

But Beyonce definitely sang to outperform him. He probably just went there to saying, he was like, oh, okay, I'm just going to, I'm doing these lines. I'm not screaming them. But that's the thing, though. It's like she sang to outperform him. him, but she still sounded worse.

Like, she didn't sound good. Which is astounding. There's a reason why she's so popular, you know, like, I'm not saying, oh, bad bunny born, best Latin pop album. That's what's up. Yeah, no shit. Like, that's, literally nobody else is being mentioned that's Latin. It's only bad bunny.

No, Kenny Garcia's not noticed also, and so is Ricky Martin. Yeah. Yeah, okay. They are. This year? Yeah. Really? Mm-hmm.

Okay. I don't know who Debbie Nova is, but I know, wait, Camillo? Oh, I hate this, like a dog. Oh, my God. Did you see people flipping out about Bill Burr? What do he do? Yeah. Bill Burr, so I saw the clip, man, and it is the most benign thing I think I've ever seen.

It's literally not even him telling a joke. It's just him being like, he went on stage, and he was, he was, for some reason, he was announcing, like, the Latino thing. and he was like the joke was basically like why am I doing this and he was like oh there must be

I wonder if there's any feminists online being like what is this cis white male doing announcing all this Latino stuff and that's all he said literally that's it actually for real that's it and Bill Burr is like he is offensive like often like he

I feel like he tries to be I remember I've talked about like one of his standups before where I was like I almost felt like like it was kind of lame in comparison to a lot of his others because I remember he was just doing material that like uh like that was his last special paper tiger yeah paper tiger the last like he he spent the first 10 to 15 minutes just being offensive on purpose and it was it was very like oh this maybe would have been funny 2016 yeah it was like it was like stuff that we used to do pretty much and only like way late but but so when I heard that bill burr was trending I was like oh he must have did he must have did something like

really hilarious. But it was just like it wasn't, it wasn't even it wasn't even funny, but I don't even think it was like necessarily supposed to be. It wasn't offensive. Did he just say stuff and people got but heard about it? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, literally. I mean, literally it's like if they'd listen to his fucking podcast, they would die

because he's just, that's like a normal, just one little thing he would say just to pass the, you know, his sentence along. Yeah. And to get to a point of whatever the fuck he's doing in a podcast. And I saw somebody curate tweets upon tweets about saying how racist he is. And then I guess somebody came out and said, well, you know, he's married to a woman, Nia, who's black. So I don't know about that. And then it started a whole other conversation about, oh, well, just because you're,

you're with a black person, this and this. And then it's like, it went into a realm of like, okay, you guys clearly aren't even talking about Bill Burr anymore. It's so funny. Because Bill Burr particularly. when people say he's racist it's so funny because if you ever just see

his career at all it's just him and a bunch of people of color like it's just Bill Burr Dave Chappelle fucking Eddie Murphy's brother and everybody from that particular group

just for the last 20 plus years it's making comedy together best of friends his best friend his best friend his best friend Patricia O'Neill fucking you died a few years back Like he started a charity

Like an organization To raise money for his family And they would do they do it annually Like they do this comedy show To raise money for his family for And that's just It's not it's kind of like I see it in the same line as Chris

Where It wasn't like you did it on purpose But like oh Two people that you happen to be really close with Or dark as shit You know like Fucking Jalen And you guys

Yeah Oh yeah It kind of like a thing. It wasn't like Chris was like, I love black people and I just want black friends, you know? Like I just like it's kind of awkward. Isn't it weird that like, oh, I know Chris pretty well too. Like it's just a fucking coincidence. Yeah.

And I think it's the same thing with Bill Burr. Like I don't think he actively pursued Nia, his wife, like, oh, because she's black. She just happened to be black. And, you know, like she's cool. And I like her. She's cool. Sometimes she pops up on the podcast. every once in a while and like she talks like they they they accent each other really well

because you know he's a fucking like hothead maniac and uh she kind of like really kind of knows how to put him in his place it's pretty good but the conversation got wild online yeah it's weird i love that it went into that weird like conversation and it's like obviously just because you have black friends doesn't mean like you're just racist people can have friends of like different like that's obviously like a fact but at the same time It's like the fact that you can't just look at somebody and just be like that that person's a racist and then use the fact that they know people of color as a way to prove that just be, you know what I mean? It's like this really weird kind of thing where it's like you're kind of, you're kind of arguing from a conclusion before you even have the fundamentals of the argument. That's so horrible.

It's become so terrible because being. Ray's literally has like, Bill Burr's most recent, I'm sorry to cut you off, but like Bill Burr's like most recent thing on Saturday Night Live, I think. He was like, he pissed people off because he was like criticizing white women. He was a dude's slandering. He should have get sent to jail for that. He was, he's going too far. And it's like, you know, you just got to fucking, I don't know. Like I just respect those.

Like Bill Burr and like Dave, Dave Chappelle in particular is just like, um, everybody always gets on his case. No, people don't understand context or can't understand what they're watching Get on Dave Zappell's case. If you have half a brain, you can look at Dave Chappelle and understand what he's talking about. Yeah, they don't care.

It's really, it, we always say, and it's kind of a cliche at this point, but to those people, context literally doesn't matter. It's just, you're saying something that I don't like and it doesn't matter what's the meaning behind it, and that's the thing that's the silliest. And, you know,

kind of sticking on point with the Grammys, there was, I'm kind of seeing people not connecting dots about, for example, I guess two things that were happening. So one thing that happened was, I think was Watt performed. I mean, at least I didn't see the,

I don't know if it was. I didn't see the audio, but, okay, so I saw them dancing. I didn't see the audio. And somebody quote tweeted it saying, um, somebody was,

oh, this was canceled, but I had, it here because it was so stupid. I just, the people were comparing shit completely incorrectly. Yeah, it was, it was like what is it? It was like, this

is okay on TV, but, but what was it? Pepe Lepeu is the problem. This is one that, that got 14, almost 15,000 likes and it shows, it shows them dancing, like, you know, they're fucking having a good old time. They're large backsides, of course.

Yes, and then, and then it says, Pepe Lepeu's the problem, though. And out That was just one of them. And I saw another one that was about, not Peppellipu, but about Dr. Seuss. And it was like this, it was the same line of thinking where they're so like, oh, thank goodness we got rid of Dr. Seuss though for the same fucking performance. And the thing that is so crazy to me is the reasoning why like, like, okay, we know why Dr. Seuss some of the books got pulled because it was like just offensive imagery that you're like

no shit. like you want to bury that. Yeah. And then, and then pebble of you is. Offensive imagery, by the way, from books that like I've never heard of. That's true. Yeah. It's not even like.

Yeah. I'm a 27 year old, you know, man in some context. Most of the time I'm a boy. Kind of. But I think, you know, like, I don't know, like I'm old enough to have remembered growing up with these books. And I've never seen any of those images and any of those books. Because presumably most people kind of understood that are like, ooh, I don't want to carry those. Yeah

But yeah Pepe L. Pugh is like another character When was the last time He was fucking Dude As a I'm telling me And I mean this genuinely

As a kid I understood That Pepe LAPE was a piece of shit He was Like I understood it Because I would see the ire

Not the ire That's wrong I would see like the Almost fear In the in the In the cat's face The female cat that you would have the I would have the ire

Yeah She'd be like, yo, chill. She would be so, like, distraught. And I'm like, dude, this isn't cool. I'm like, I'm seeing this and I'm not laughing because I'm like, it's not like, it was just, it was interesting. So I understand that where it's like, oh, maybe we don't want to promote this guy. Even though I guess what happened to Space Jam 2, they deleted a scene where he was like hitting on this one chick and then she checks him. And that chick's actually pissed off.

The actress, she's like pissed off like, oh, like this would have been a great moment to like, show kids that are like, hey, don't fucking do shit like this. Yeah. So she actually wanted this scene in there, but at the same time, the studio was probably like, ah, let's just avoid this altogether. Which is not done. It's not done, honestly. Here's the thing, right?

Like, ideally, I would want, like, whatever the fuck the director wants. Like, if he wants to put the scene in, just fucking put the scene in. And, like, who cares? Like, I don't give a shit. But at the same time, it's like, people have to understand that this is, and we went over this last time, kind of. but this is not what cancel culture is. Cancel culture is about people.

It's about, like, actual people being affected by shit. It's like, oh, it's like bringing up Aziz Ansari in the same sentence as fucking Harvey Weinstein, as if those two people are comparable people. That's different than, you know, Generation Z looking at Pepe Lepeu and being like, oh, that's kind of fucking weird, isn't it? You know, that's just a completely... Pepe Lepeu isn't, like, in his fucking apartment crying,

like how he's gonna fucking support his kids. He's fucking fictional. He's not a real person. I feel you. Everyone is, it's just, it's so weird. It's just the polarity of everything. Everyone's so polarized about every fucking thing that exists. And it's like, well, that's not okay.

Well, how is that okay? If that's not, and it's just, every, it's just fingers pointing and everybody crying over shit. And it's just like, dude, like they control Pepe de Pue. Let them do what he's going to do with them, you know? Like, I know. Also, Pepe Lepeu hasn't been relevant in a while. Like, he hasn't even been, like, if he, that's the thing. It's like he has been ostensibly canceled anyway.

Success starts with your drive. An American public university is here to fuel it. With affordable tuition and over 200 flexible online programs, APU helps you gain the skills and confidence to move forward. Whether you're changing careers, starting fresh, or pursuing a lifelong passion, our programs are designed for people who never stop. You bring the fire,

APU will fuel the journey. Learn more at APU. at APU. APUS.edu. I've got Dan Morgan here on the pod. Say hi, Dan. Hey, how's it going today? It's going good, man. Tell us who you are and what you do.

I'm Dan Morgan. I'm an attorney and a managing partner at Morgan and Morgan, which is America's largest injury law firm. That's pretty awesome. I think I saw a billboard of yours recently that said $20 billion. $20 billion is an insane number.

Yeah, $20 billion recover. It's actually, I think, somewhere north, probably closer to 22, 23 after this year. And each year we get bigger and batter and our army grows. So the number will hopefully keep getting bigger and bigger as time goes on. Awesome. So how does someone get in contact with Morgan and Morgan? What would I do if I got into an accident? Probably the easiest way is dialing pound law.

That's pound 529 from your cell phone. We are always open. Our call center is always waiting to take your call. 24-7, 365. Wow. Dan Morgan. From Morgan and Morgan, America's Large Injury Law, Thanks for coming by the show.

Thanks for having me. Visit for the people.com for an office near you. Because I haven't seen or heard from that fucking character. Exactly. Since way before I was even fucking born, I think, probably. Like, I can't even remember. I can't, I swear to God, I can't remember a single instance where Pepe Lepew had any impact on my childhood whatsoever

outside of the fact that he was on, like, really old Looney Tunes reruns that I would catch on TV sometimes. I'd really see Pepe de Pew. dead anyway. He was the, I rarely saw Pepe. I always saw Sylvester. Yeah.

With Sylvester, Bugs, and Daffy. That's it. And look, there's a lot of characters like that where it's like, you know, like,

I love Johnny Bravo, but obviously that's not going to fly today. Obviously. Johnny Bravo's a creep. Even when I was little, I thought he was a creep. I was like,

this guy. No, he needs to fucking calm down. Hey, Momo's going on. Hey, mama, what's going on? You want to,

was he, was he making fun of Elvis Presley? Yes, no shit. He was a fucking greaser that sounded like Elvis, yes. Yeah, the whole thing was an Elvis impression. I want to do the monkey with me? Do the monkey with me.

Can he steal something? Oh, my God. He was pretty great. I loved Johnny Bravo was definitely one of my favorite. It was one of my favorite ones as far as the Cartoon Network. Yeah, it was fun. It was fun because he would always, he was another one that would just always get his ass handed to him. His sister always said the meanest shit to him.

He would never, never understand it. would say like fucking deep cutting shit well like johnny that's why you have a right towel dysfunction you stupid bitch i fucking hate you and they'd be like hey sally she said that hey sally calm down right don't you got to go to school or something he's just like you stupid you bitch bitch i don't think that was his sister either i think that was just some random girl in the neighbor he just hung out with a random girl in the neighborhood that man that man is danger always thought a little bit weird about that too yeah i thought that was her sister because that's the only thing that makes sense That's the only time you're allowed to hang around with a kid much younger to you

As if it's your sibling that is the only time Are you sure have you seen back to the future At least Marty was tech no actually no that's not okay either That's not okay I'm gonna be real with you right I'm I tried to I try to defend doc and I realize that doc Doc ain't right neither you know Yeah well I mean he did what is it he stole plutonium from what Lebanon or something did something what was um wasn't there was something else oh somebody had a tweet too about about the uh

about the about the the the carty b performance where it was like uh oh my god it was like some isis tweet it was like it was like uh maybe islam has a point about the west damn that sounds like fucking uh paul jose of watson it's paul joseph watson tear i forget who said it but i saw it on my I'm my fucking... And I was just like, dude, this is fucking wild. Maybe ISIS was right about the West. It's weird. People need to calm down.

The thing that's confusing to me is that... And this might just be a hunch of mine. But I have a distinct feeling that a lot of the people who would, who are kind of like think about the childrening, the Cardi B and whatever the fuck, uh, performance of Wop at the Grammys, are also, I feel like those people have a large overlap with the people like five years ago

who were like complaining about Anita Sarkeesian kind of wanting characters, female characters in games to cover up, you know what I mean? Where like, yeah, yeah. I get the sense that there's this weird kind of like, I want my digital women to be naked, but I can't handle Cardi B. just dressed vaguely sexually at a fucking award show that barely anybody gives a shit about anymore. I don't know. It's just very bizarre to me.

My weird thing is that like sex has been one of the bleeding marking tool since like the dawn of time. And all of a sudden everyone is so fucking weird. Like people are like, well, whoa, what are you doing? You can't, you can't come out here. It's like, yo, what the fuck ever, dude? Like, I'm never going to understand why people care so much about other people's bodies. I'm never going to understand that. It's fake.

It's fake. It's either fake or it's mental illness, bro. It has to be mental illness. Well, there's some mental illness aspect, but it's mostly just a public persona where all those people are fucking watching the nastiest, dirtiest shit in behind closed doors. Like, they're a bunch of fucking liars. They're sub to people's only fans and shit. It's like they're the same. Oh, absolutely. It's just nonsense.

Man. Nobody gives a shit. They're sub to day old 18 year old only fans. Like they're fucking just monsters. Day old. You've been 18 for three days. Just hovering around just looking for fucking. Swooping.

Oh shit. Happy birthday. Sub. God damn it. Oh, man. But that's, that is 100% and that's why whenever I see those people tweet shit out like that, I can never take it seriously because in your, like you say,

in your, in your heart of heart. I'm like, how do you see women wearing basically bathing suits or something and then dancing? And that's freaking you out. Like, I just don't believe it at all. I can't. Even the ridiculous outfits that they're wearing in the fucking on that performance, it's like... Success starts with your drive. An American Public University is here to fuel it.

With affordable tuition and over 200 flexible online programs, APU helps you gain the skills and confidence to move forward. Whether you're changing careers, starting fresh, or pursuing a lifelong passion, our programs are designed for people who never stop. You bring the fire, APU will fuel the journey. Learn more at APU.apus.edu. I've got Dan Morgan here on the pod. Say hi, Dan.

Hey, how's it going today? It's going good, man. Tell us who you are and what you do. I'm Dan Morgan. I'm an attorney and a managing partner at Morgan & Morgan, which is America's largest injury law firm. That's pretty awesome. I think I saw billboarded years recently. It said 20 billion one. 20 billion is an insane number. Yeah, 20 billion recovered. It's actually, I think somewhere north, probably closer to 22, 23 after this year.

And each year we get bigger and badder and our army grows. So the number will hopefully keep getting bigger and bigger as time goes on. Awesome. So how does someone get in contact with Morgan and Morgan? What would I do if I got into an accident? Probably the easiest way is dialing pound law. That's pound 529 from your cell phone. We are always open. Our call center is always waiting to take your call. 24-7, 365. Wow. Dan Morgan.

From Morgan and Morgan, America's Large Injury Law, from, thanks for coming by the show. Thanks for having me. Visit furtherpeople.com for an office near you. It's less skin than a bathing suit, you know? Like, it's actually covering more than a bathing suit would. And it's like, just fucking get the fuck over yourself. Like, it's fine.

It's such not a big deal. People, it's weird, though, because it's like, I feel like everybody understands this. Like, even in, like, like old I remember when I first saw like a Christmas story

right for the first time and it was like this really old movie and all these like children were cursing like cursing up a fucking storm and I was like oh so it's like actually like not a new thing that kids are kind of like that kids curse

because I remember I grew up and I thought that that was like a new thing I thought that that was like yeah like because I thought it was like oh you know TV or whatever the fuck and shit was like I loved to curse when I was a kid

you know I fucking did it all the time but I remember thinking that that was a new thing because like in my head like the past is like they didn't have curses yet

it's not even that it's just like the media from the past is so wholesome like leave it to beaver and shit and you just like oh the kids there's no way that kid's cursing then you watch a Christmas story it's definitely worse

it's definitely worse than ours is now definitely way worse but that's the thing it's like I remember even old movies where like kids were like, like fucking children were like, there were whole plot points in older movies about kids like finding dirty magazines and shit, you know, kids, this isn't new to fucking people. Like, it's not new that like some kids gonna stumble across some fucking Megan the Stallion video on fucking YouTube or whatever when they're watching the fucking

Grammys. Like, who cares? Just explain shit to them. I feel like a lot of people are just like, I have kids and I'm scared because I don't want to have an awkward conversation with them. So please make it likely that I won't have that conversation ever, please. That's the problem. You know? A lot of people can't talk their children about that. And it's wild because you're just not arming your kids to be proper functioning people. Yeah. I mean, if you if you just talk to them beforehand, they would be all right. You know, and also it could be some people freaking out that, you know, large projection of I remember being a kid and I remember what some of this stuff did to me. I didn't know how to control my, you know, some fucking weirdos. They got, uh,

the Victoria Secret or something, and then they went nuts or something. Like, just not having really any self-governing at all because you're a kid. And, you know, like, I remember some wild years, like, so it was, like, 12, 13, and, like, the internet was still pretty shitty. But I was, like, really trying to, like, download stuff.

Took forever. But I had, like, a nice disc full of porn, you know. And I think I didn't go beyond that, though. But I imagine maybe some of those people that are freaking out probably did some really wild shit that I can't even really imagine. and they're just like freaked out like oh my god my kid's gonna turn out to be a sick sadistic fucking perver like me maybe I don't know yeah but I don't I don't know but yeah but meanwhile they're like

pacifying their children with like rated M video games that are that have like 4K 4K graphically like like last of us two people fucking gar dude that somebody kills the last of us two genuinely I've seen there's nothing that last of us two can do genuinely that can surprise me kill-wise, but still some of the kills were like, man, I felt him leave. This is a video game program, but I felt this guy leave.

It's super brutal, and I'm like, I'm not against that shit. Like, I'm like, totally like whatever the fuck, but at the same time, I just think it's just weird that we're more comfortable with that than we are just like some chick dancing on stage in like a low quality fucking stream

of an award show who's showing less skin than your average fucking beach beach going lady is. It's because everyone's afraid. Everyone's afraid to do what there's. Everyone wants to pass the blame of everything on to everybody else, bro. That's how it works. Instead of people just being parents, like even me, even me, like my grandmother,

great woman taught me so much about the, she taught me a lot about, like, morality and how to be a good person, stuff like that. I disregarded it, of course. But she would never talk to me about sex ever, even though she was a scientist. She was a doctor herself. Because it was just like, my family didn't teach me about this.

so I guess I'm not going to teach my kids about this and then literally my cousin was the one that taught me everything I needed to know about like sexual activity because I felt like I had sex way too young and I was very fucking confused about it I was like oh I don't think I like this exactly and he was like well you got to find the right person to like it I thought I was supposed to just do this because I'm a boy

and boys put their penises and things and he was like nah dude you're really wrong yeah I mean I didn't have I didn't have any guiding, I didn't have any guidance either, but luckily the internet was pretty on point with sex ed. And not like me being a dumbass kid where I knew the difference between, oh,

let me, like, sex ed education, you're not going to get sex ed from porn. You're getting it from people that have, like, lab coats on and they're saying, they're actually saying stuff that makes sense,

and they're not just, like, showing you power moves and shit. Because I don't know, man, I think a lot of people got fucked up. Like I got a, I'm supposed to stroke this way. I'm like, dude, if you, regular, if you ever see regular amateur sex recorded versus porn, it's fucking night and day. And I feel like a lot of kids are getting fucked up because they're just looking at porn. Like, oh, I'm supposed to do this shit.

Dude, you're going. You go on and put your fist inside a gross vagina. He's like, what are you doing? Like, I saw this on a video. And you fucking wallop her insides. Two nice stern punches in our fucking cervix. And he's like, I'm going to die if you do that again. It's like, no, trust me.

The video said, he's really. supposed to do. All right. Trust me. All right. Believe me. Bop. Believe me. Bob. Ah, yeah. Oh, my God. All right. Well, uh, you guys want to move on to some questions?

Let's do it. Let's wipe them out. I'm trying to find the name of this icedy Gears of War song, but I can't find the name of it. Like it pops up, but it just says body count gears of war. I got new. I got news. I got news for you. I got screws. I got gears for you.

I got a bunch of screws. That's great. Oh, my God. All right. Jacques 55 wrote in. He says, Hello, Chris, Derek, and Sweeney. But he writes,

he puts an X with all of our, where all of our vowels are. It's pretty good. I think, what is it? Oh, wow. That's actually weirdly appropriate. The locus from Gears of War versus the xenomorphs from aliens.

Who wins? The xenomorphs. What? Xenomorphs. What a doubt. What a doubt. Geno Morphs can beat anything. Like genuinely.

They're literally built to inhabit, take the best features, and then continually be produced on a planet. You can't beat them, really. But could they beat count, could they beat, do you think, cancel culture. Maybe you could cancel. I mean, that's definitely for sexual interaction. If they're going to put a baby in your mouth

without you like saying you want them to. So, yeah. They get canceled for fucking... You can definitely cancel them. For definitely forced sexual interaction. Yeah, absolutely. Cancel them. They lost easy W.

Damn. It's just the solution to everything. We just cancel it. Just cancel the fucking aliens. You're probably right. I don't know. Like, the locusts are strong. but like, I feel like just,

xenomorphs are so fucking animalistic that I wouldn't even know how to... Are they tactical? They're cunning, like animals are. Wait a minute, but don't they have ships? No. Who has the ships? The predators. The predators are...

The predators are literally just elites. No, no, no, but... No, the aliens have ships. They don't have ships. What are they on then? They're just on a planet, and then one person gets affected, than a person.

What happens is that there's always one dickhead that sends a signal from a planet. People come to that planet to see what happens. There's xenomorphs on the planet. Somebody gets infected. The ship leaves. The ship lands somewhere else with the xenomorph infected people.

They go around and they make more xenomorph and that's just a thing. There's this one guy that survives again. And he's like, please come help me. And then they do the same exact thing over and over again. Yeah. Have you seen stupid... Prometheus?

Yeah. Have you seen that? you kind of see the origins of how that shit even got started. But wasn't it like white piccolo fucking walks up to like a river and like throws up a worm or something? It's not fucking Piccolo, dude. It's handsome Squidward. Come on, dude. Oh, that's right. Let's be real. I forgot.

I don't like that. I've never thought of a white pickle in my life. And I instantly thought of this man that's like Piccolo with red hair. Everybody who listens to this show, I want you to send Sweeney Photoshop's of of piccolo with white skin. And I'm talking about like the people on New Girl. Like that kind of...

Oh my God. Well, what you call it on New Girl? The voice actor for Peter B. Parker's there. So show some respect, you know? Yeah, I don't know. I would imagine Xenomores probably have it. I wouldn't be able to predict xenomorphs movements or actions.

I mean, you don't got to predict their action. They're like their animals. They're stupid, you know. But they have good senses. But like, you can't... Like, killing. an animal's not very hard. We've been doing it for thousands and thousands and

thousands of years. You can trick them. We've been killing specific animals for a long time. What is a xenomars have a bunch of physical traits that make them crazy? But all you have to do is lay a trap and a xenomar fall for the trap and then you'd blow its head off. It has acidic blood, which is dangerous.

And it has all those vision, those thermal kinds of vision. But like, I don't think killing them is going to be that hard. It's going to be dealing with the fact that they, every one they take down as potentially going to be another xenomorph. That's the dangerous part. You can't,

but you, you can't compare a xenomorph to like a fucking lion or something. Like, these are vastly different creatures. Like, this is like a, like a huge step up from just your average fucking big cat or like a coyote with like rabies or something.

You can probably handle a coyote. They're definitely more dangerous. That is absolutely 100% true. They're probably more dangerous because, I mean, that's why they've made comics in and two movies of fucking aliens and predators going at it. Yeah. It's not just that simple.

That's true. But people kill them too. Otherwise. No, no, no. But listen. Well, yeah. Listen, here's the thing. We have Jaws, right?

We have a movie about several Jaws movies about how terrifying a shark is and how you're probably fucked if you're ever going to be fighting a shark. We have alien movies about how fucked you'd probably be fighting aliens. We don't have lion movies. You know, we don't have line movies because we know we'll just shoot them in the head. Success starts with your drive, and American Public University is here to fuel it.

With affordable tuition and over 200 flexible online programs, APU helps you gain the skills and confidence to move forward. Whether you're changing careers, starting fresh, or pursuing a lifelong passion, our programs are designed for people who never stop. You bring the fire, APU will fuel the journey. Learn more at APU.

APUS.edu.edu. I've got Dan Morgan here on the pod. Say hi, Dan. Hey, how's it going today? It's going good, man. Tell us who you are and what you do. I'm Dan Morgan. I'm an attorney and a managing partner

at Morgan and Morgan, which is America's largest injury law firm. That's pretty awesome. I think I saw billboard of years recently that said $20 billion. $20 billion is an insane number. Yeah, $20 billion recovered. It's actually, I think, somewhere north,

probably closer to 22, 23 after this year. And each year we get bigger and badder and our army grows. So the number will hopefully keep getting bigger and bigger as time goes on. Awesome. So how does someone get in contact with Morgan and Morgan? What would I do if I got into an accident? Probably the easiest way is dialing pound law. That's pound 529 from your cell phone.

We are always open. Our call center is always waiting to take your call. 24-7-365. Wow. Dan Morgan. From Morgan and Morgan, America's Large Injury Law, and thanks for coming by the show. Thanks for having me.

Visit furtherpeople.com for an office near you. You shoot a lion in the head. I remember that, like, famous video that was like, I don't know, maybe it wasn't famous, and I just saw it, but I remember this video of this lion running after a dude, and he gets shot in his slams on the guy. His lands on the dude, it's a wife. And it's just dead, but it's like, you know,

you can just take a fucking lion out. It's easy. But like, like, a fucking alien that, like, slithes around in the fucking dark on the ceiling and the ventured shit with acidic blood and a second mouth in its mouth. And it got, fucking sword tails.

Yeah, like, no, you're fucking dangerous. I don't think he could beat them, but like, they're like, you can kill a few. Like, a trained hunter could probably kill it. Like, one of those fucking woodmen, like, one of those woodmen, like, they live in a wood, they have a fucking wolf dog as an ally, not even a pet. Like, one of those guys, maybe.

Oh, woodman? A woodman, yeah, like those, you know, like those typical-lumberjack? Those typical, like, white men that go into the woods, and they get really good at hunting and killing and they have a ally, Wolfdog, it's not their pet It's their it's their their ally They work together Yeah

I got you Like one of those like I'm really good at killing people I was a Marine for six I was a Marine for six years I was in combat for For seven of them Yeah he's got like a camouflage

vest but like white pants White pants he has a bow and arrow That has a explode That always has a stick a dynamite on it And you're like why is that dynamite never like burned down to the bottom and blown up and he's like, don't worry about that boy, I can't tell you all my secrets.

Dynamite is so wildly cartoonish. Primitive. Like, the fact that it actually looks like it does in the cartoons is actually like wild. Like, because bombs don't look like they do in the cartoons. Bombs look like bowling balls with candle wicks. But, like, dynamite really is just like

exactly what it looks like. It's crazy. But what do we got here? Imagine paying $60 for Pokemon sword and shield rodin says hello legally blind most fuckable earlobes of 2020

and I'm too scared to talk shit about Sweeney Jesus Christ I'm wondering if it is I hate questions like these I'm wondering if it is gay to jerk off and intentionally come on your own face

I would rule it out as weird but possibly straight. Technically. Similarly to how I feel about self-felatio. Listen. Is it gay to scratch an it? First of all. Time out, is it a gay to scratch an inch?

First of all, yes. Is it, what? Yeah. No, it's not. Why are you getting sexual gratification from that? Yeah, it's gay. It's gay. Chris has never scratched himself.

Chris has all his old skin on his arms. Like, he reveals that part of his arms. And this is a ton of fucking old dead skin Never scratched myself once I've never I have never once I've never once scratched a single itch that I've ever had I just let it fall off Good man

All I'm saying is that if you suck your own dick It's not particularly gay but it's still sucking dick Which is a little strange Technically it's not gay It's not just out of technicality Yeah you're by yourself It's not it's not Yeah

anything is not because that's just yourself. But if you're also, but if you're coming in your own face, that's definitely at least extremely weird. It's definitely bizarre and you should definitely stop. Especially if you arc it and you just pop yourself on your forehead every time. You're like, hey, hey, hey, hey.

Here's. You're doing that. Yeah. You probably want that done by somebody else. I'm just assuming. Here's the thing, though. Or you're probably trying to practice your aim. At the same time, at the same time,

I feel like, even if you were gay that's a weird thing to do for real you know like that's just strange that's not gay straight or queer or any that's just bizarre activity that's a bizarre feature that you've developed in your

in your personality and I would suggest maybe calm down that is some garlick shit bro that is some fucking disgusting subhuman shit it's like pissing all over yourself It's like shit in your pants.

It's like sitting down and shit in your pants. That's it. Y'all are kind of, you all need to back up a little bit. Because there's way too many, because you're saying that's like shit, okay, the only reason I'm saying back up is because obviously self-filatio is like,

come on, that's extreme. But it's almost like you're trying to send a signal to women that they're fucking, they're crazy for wanting to get a shot in the mouth or something. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. To yourself. But it's, but, but, of course,

But you see that it's still, why is it so insane? Because you're comparing, what I'm saying is you're comparing piss and shit to come. I don't think you should ever do that. I am comparing the oddness, the abnormality of someone just coming on their own face. I'm not comparing come. Look, I'm not comparing. Okay, no. So, you kind of are.

You kind of are. You kind of are. You know, I agree. You are right. But it's still peculiar that you're just like. like just do that's just a strange thing one is definitely worse than the other it is strange but look it I understand look it this is what this is this is coming from an objective understanding the act of fallatio and finishing on someone's face when you do that to a woman you think that

shit's hot as fuck I'm I know that there's people that are like oh they think that's hot as fuck and they want it done to them but they don't have a mate I'm assuming so they do it to themselves they do it to themselves okay I'm assuming okay I'm assuming right now so right now so right So right now you're your, so right now what you're doing is you're white womaning championing for another group right now. You're what you're doing is you're like, this is my problem also because you're going through this. I care so much. I'm going to help you. Look, man.

But I understand. You're right. I'm, look. No, no, no. Look, to me, as far as kinks go, that's not the, it's something that I'm so like, look, let me, let me tell you this. Let me, let me, let me be real. I fucking hate When my own

Jizz touches me at Exactly That's primitive I look at it's a little Look at I think To myself I feel like Maybe it shouldn't bother me this much

Because I'm talking about like It's on my fucking finger And I'm pissed off Like I'm it's It bothers me Of course it does So But should it bother you

That much No It does It is Listen I'm not saying that they're equivalently bad. I'm not saying like it's the it's exactly the same as like shitting yourself. What I'm saying is this is this is bodily extrament and it's bizarre to just

intentionally, it's bizarre to spit all over yourself, it's bizarre to vomit all over yourself, it's bizarre to expel any kind of anything out of you you onto yourself on purpose. Imagine you, imagine you, imagine, well imagine you went to a fucking party and some guy kept sneezing into his own arm and snotting himself. What's wrong with you? Look, we don't,

look it, we don't, but yet, yet, when we do it to women, we think it's totally normal. I've never sneezed on the woman and it'd be like,

ha, ha, ha, I'm talking about coming. But I'm talking about coming. I don't particularly like coming on women, bro. Well, you're, you're boring.

I'm not boring. I just don't, that's not, you're clearly fucking boring. I like, I like, I like, I like,

I like, I like putting a check in a deposit box, you know? That's the, yeah, I'm not trying to have fucking children. Obviously, that's what I prefer, you know. That's the least work.

It's no cleanup. All I got to do is fall over and go to bed afterwards, you know. If I'm ever in that situation, I usually say, ew, gross, get out. Ew, ew, ew. Right afterwards. Ew, ew, get out. You guys are fucking, man, what the, what the hell is going on here? I'm just joking.

I don't know. I don't know if he are. But, go ahead. You think I finished out somebody's faces that I say, ill, gross, get out. Like some fucking sociopath? Like I'm on the fucking show you. You do it and then you scream at her. Get the fuck out.

Get the fuck out. You're disgusting. It's violent. I'm sure that's real. Real fast. Bro, it's like being in the moment. Like, and then it's like this. I imagine this.

I imagine like say you're not into getting a finger in your ass or whatever. Not anymore really. You're so you're so hyped up in the moment. Some chick just slips it in. But you're like, I'm just going to finish anyway. Whatever. I'm so hyped up. And then as soon as you finish, you're like, what the fuck?

And then you fucking suplexer and shit. Derek, Derek, Derek. I'm going to be real with you. I'm real with the podcast for one time ever. That has happened to me before. And I literally stopped. I stopped having sex with a very attractive woman. And there's like, don't ever do something like that to me again.

And like I yell. Like, I don't yell at women because I know that I have a man's voice. And if I yell at a lady, she'll start crying. And I'm this instantly the victim. But that has happened to me before and I'd be like, yo, don't ever do that to me again. And I stopped. My penis, my penis fucking dropped like the, like, it was like 1932. Everything fell.

Everything went to fucking ruin. Fucking Black Tuesday, son. Everything went to fucking ruin. Look, man, I, I get it. I just, I feel like there's, I imagine there are thousands of people right now that are listening. and they're just like wow and I'll and I will admit I'm like yeah I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm a sexual prude I'm not it's crazy adventurous because some of the stuff like I don't do any of that shit but I imagine there's a bunch of people that are like oh that's it that you that's you that's you fucking

like the act of like getting come on you that freaks you out like you're a fucking you're you're you're you're very lame and I'm say like I yes I am but uh I just I accept that You know, I don't, I don't, I don't, but what I don't do is I don't put, I'm not putting it on everybody else. Like, everybody else is absolutely insane. I just never like, I'm pretty basic. Like, say you ask me, people like, oh, what kind of shit are you into? What kind of kicks? I'm like, I don't really, I don't know, man. What stuff? Fire. I guess. A little bit of fire. You like saying you're like saying you're made on fire. Fire and metal. I don't listen, man. I don't finish on anything except a physical on disc copy of enemy territory, Quake Wars on Xbox 360. That's the only way I can. Oh, that's a good. That's a nice kink right there. That's the only way I can go. Could you imagine you go to someone's house and there's a bunch of dried come on game this? Success starts with your drive, and American Public University is here to fuel it. With affordable tuition and over 200 flexible online programs, APU helps you gain the skills and confidence to move forward. Whether you're changing careers, starting fresh, or pursuing a lifelong passion,

our programs are designed for people who never stop. You bring the fire, APU will fuel the journey. Learn more at apu.apus.edu.edu. I've got Dan Morgan here on the pod. Say hi, Dan. Hey, how's it going today? It's going good, man. Tell us who you are and what you do.

I'm Dan Morgan. I'm an attorney and a managing partner at Morgan and Morgan, which is America's largest injury law firm. That's pretty awesome. I think I saw Billboard of yours recently that said $20 billion. $20 billion is an insane number. Yeah, $20 billion recovered. It's actually, I think, somewhere north,

probably closer to 22, 23 after this year. And each year we get bigger and badder and our army grows. So the number will hopefully keep getting bigger and bigger as time goes on. Awesome. So how does someone get in contact with Morgan and Morgan? What would I do if I got into an accident? Probably the easiest way is dialing pound law. That's pound 529 from your cell phone.

We are always open. Our call center is always waiting to take your call. 24-7-365. Wow. Dan Morgan. From Morgan and Morgan, America's Large Injury Lawfram. Thanks for coming by the show. Thanks for having me.

Visit furtherpeople.com for an office near you. Just one game this specifically. No, like every great game. Are you walking Red Dead fucking two is a fucking, it's a saber. It looks like a fucking shiriken, how much comment's been dried on it. And you're like, what the fuck did you do? I really love that game. So, leave immediately.

I got real distracted and picked up a copy of official Xbox magazine. while you guys were talking about come. And for whatever reason, this is like an issue, this is an issue from October 2007 and there's a little blurb about Army of 2. And for some reason, I don't know if this is reversed on your screen or not.

It probably is. But it says a new take on feminine hygiene. I don't get it. I don't understand it either. Let's keep moving. Let's know. What's the next question? Next question?

I don't get it at all. No, I read through it. And I don't, it's, it never, comes up again. All right. Well, we answered, we got to the bottom of that mystery. Yeah,

it's definitely, it's weird. Go ahead. What? Oh, I can't read this. It's too offensive, Rodin. Greetings, token Ed Ed Nettie.

That's fucked up. Damn. Damn, son. That's so fucking... If you were a character... Oh, I love this question. If you were a character in a fighting game,

what would your stage be? Would there be any other people or characters making... Amios in it. Mine would be a lively stage where someone's getting beheaded. I knew it. I knew yours would be like live.

Like a live. Like in a cave with all these fucking. Or like in Mortal Kombat. And Mortal Kombat or you can like interfere with the stage. You can take the head of somebody's got cut off and throw it at the person. And throw it at them. Oh my God. That's pretty good.

Might would just be like a bunch of dudes coming on their faces. Like just while watching these. It would just be a dorm with a soggy waffle in the middle And it's a fucking initiation going on And all these dudes are just coming all over each other It's coming all over each other It looks like somebody melted a bunch of marshmallow And poured it all over the floor

It's disgusting And fucking Giles theme songs playing Kyle's That's playing That'd be so ridiculous How many copies that I game you think would be sold? Like, I don't know, seven? Maybe six.

I'm reaching, maybe six. it's six and a demo six and the first tech demo yeah the demo disc what about you Chris would yours be yeah what's your boring ass you're gonna be yeah we both got really cool ones

mine probably be just be like Chunle's inner thighs or something like it's just the entire backstage the backdrops their fucking thighs that's amazing and like

If you somehow detach the camera from the people, you could see like the little bit of patch of her purse. If you go and you keep angling down, you're like, dang, the game doesn't go any further than that. You can see a little bit of the patch. Oh, shit. You see a little bit of them. Just purely pornographic. Like nothing clever, nothing, nothing anything. There's no cleverness to be had here.

I'm with it. Yo, you guys see fucking Chun Lee? You see Cheeked Lee and Fortnite? Her butt is but dumped. But dump truck. That shit fucking. That took my soul. I was like I was surprised to see that only because like I didn't like I thought for sure in the current climate like that wouldn't that that wouldn't be I agree you know I made sure I unlocked her in the game I at least got her I was like I gotta at least get this character fuck reju dude I couldn't fucking bring myself I downloaded Fortnite specifically for that but I couldn't do it's up to press lunch I couldn't press lunch you fucked up man I definitely got that skin bro that's all that's all that's all that's all

That's the only reason I played. I was like, I'm going to do what I didn't do to get this skin. I got the skin. I turned it off. That's so ridiculous. You're never going to play Fortnite again with that skin, probably. Probably not. Yeah, so what's the point?

I got it. I got it. I got it. I got it. I got the sword, you know? You just mod her into Resident Evil fucking... Look, look. I fucking, dude.

Yes. Dude, look. Holy shit, yes. Once you already got Excalibur, you still want to get Dark Drinker, you know? You got to get them both. What the fuck you're talking about? If you have one legendary sword, you know, you still might want to get another legendary sword

just to have it, you know? What do I need another legendary sword for? Because what if that one can do things the other one can't? You know, you got to make sure you got them both. I mean, what? I'm not going to carry multiple legendary swords on me. Like I'm some kind of... What?

Because I'm not a nomad. I'm not moving all my shit constantly. You never know. Whatever I need on it. But what if someone else gets that sword and they kill you with the sword? What are they going after me for? Because you got legendary sword. starts with your drive, an American public university is here to fuel it. With affordable

tuition and over 200 flexible online programs, APU helps you gain the skills and confidence to move forward. Whether you're changing careers, starting fresh, or pursuing a lifelong passion, our programs are designed for people who never stop. You bring the fire, APU will fuel the journey. Learn more at APU.apus.edu. I've got Dan Morgan here on the pod. Say hi, Dan. Hey, how's it going today? It's going good, man. Tell us who you are and what you do. I'm Dan Morgan.

I'm an attorney and a managing partner at Morgan and Morgan, which is America's largest injury law firm. That's pretty awesome. I think I saw billboard of years recently that said 20 billion one. 20 billion is an insane number. Yeah, 20 billion recovered. It's actually, I think, somewhere north, probably closer to 22, 23 after this year.

And each year we get bigger and badder and our army grows. so the number will hopefully keep getting bigger and bigger as time goes on. Awesome. So how does someone get in contact with Morgan and Morgan? What would I do if I got into an accident? Probably the easiest way is dialing pound law. That's pound 529 from your cell phone. We are always open.

Our call center is always waiting to take your call. 24-7, 365. Wow. Dan Morgan. From Morgan and Morgan, America's Large Injury Lawfirm, thanks for coming by the show. Thanks for having me. Visit furtherpeople.com for an office near you. Do people with legendary swords just fight each other because they have?

have legendary swords? Well, the swords are symbols of power, you know? The sword is symbols of power, you know? So if you have a legendary sword, you'll be like, dang, this person could potentially kill me and take my legendary sword. So I might have come after you to kill you and take yours. I'm not trying to kill nobody for their legendary sword. I'm just trying to go around, I'm trying to mind my own business with my legendary sword. But you never know, man. You got to make sure, look, all I'm saying is that if I got a legendary sword, I got to get a real legendary sword. And then once I get all of them. So it's like Pokemon, but for swords? And then once I have them all, I'm going to smelt them all down and make one ridiculous

powerful legendary sword. You know what kind of blew my mind recently? What's up? I mentioned Pokemon out of the blue but I turned on like the first episode of Pokemon like the original series. Yeah? Like out of curiosity. And it opens up the very first scene of that show is the game. Yeah, you didn't know that? I had

no idea. I never watched Pokemon really. Really? I caught it like every now and again like I caught like maybe like five out of context minutes every morning on like WB11 or whatever the fuck. But I didn't like... I watched it. I didn't keep in touch with like the plot or anything. You know what's crazy? That episode of Pokemon argues on one of the top like

top 200 most viewed moments in television history, I'd argue. What? That beginning of the first episode of Pokemon. Where it's like the game screen? It's the Nieder and the Gangar, right? It's the Niteran and Gengar, right? Yeah. That's like one of the most famous moments in TV, I'd argue.

Yeah, I mean, by the time streaming services were around, I was never curious to watch Pokemon again. Like, I was way outgrown from Pokemon at that point. I can't imagine it. I'm watching Pokemon. You know what I started watching again, though? For real. I tried. I tried. Digimon. Digimon goes hard, bro. I thought Digimon was kind of bad.

Like, I liked it when I was a kid, but I feel like it was one of those... What happens is, which is nuts. It's insane. They continued the story with the same, like, original characters from the same beginning point. And now they're, like, college students. And they're like... So they grew up? Yeah, like, it's kind of weird. It's jarring. because you know how Pokemon they never grew up. And Dragon Balls, the only person that grew up was Gohan.

I'd say everybody was the same exact age. So it's so weird seeing them that they actually grew up and they were like, yeah, dude, we did this years ago. And like they reset all their Digimon so the Digimon don't remember them the same way they used to. It's so fucking cool. I was like, yo, this is amazing. Paul also got me into because Paul also loves Digimon. So it was like, dude, you got to watch it. Digimon was kind of like, it was all right.

It's pretty dope, man. I used to draw my friends Me and my homies We would uh We we we we drew Our friends and teachers as Digimon Like they weren't actually like monsters But we like would just draw them really fucked up

And make them dig evolve into like war shit Like uh We had one of our teachers like Like fucking dig evolve into like a fucking Predator and shit Because we didn't like them You know like so So we made them like all fucked up

Stuff like that But I gotta say man When it came to all the those shows, my shit was a Monster Rancher. Monster Rancher went bananas. That show was so good. It was so, it was so fun. It was definitely dog shit. It was definitely

a dog shit show. But I liked that they had the... It was charming. They had the golem that could break apart and then turn it to a cyclone. That was one of my most favorite moments from the show when I was little. Dude, the cool thing about the game Monster Rancher, if you ever played it, was for you to get specific

monsters, you would just put in different disc. Like, you would just grab a disc and see and just it would read and it would turn into different stuff. That's so cool. Some of the things could be rare if they, it was really cool, but also your monsters fucking died, which was bullshit. That's like, if you're a kid, that's like heartbreaking, you would raise these things, and then they would die, and you would see its ghost in the fucking ranch.

And I'm like, this is bullshit. That's fucked up. I never, I never got into Monster Rancher because they didn't like ranch as a dressing. I didn't like farmers. I didn't like any of that. Well, ranch is a disgusting dressing. If you like ranch, you're less than human. What?

You're subhuman. Ranch is disgusting. Ranch is like super popular, though. Yeah. It is, but most people are subhuman. Do you both agree with that? You like ranch, Chris? No, I don't, but I'm just surprised that like 100% of this podcast doesn't like ranch.

It's like very rare. My girlfriend likes ranch and I insult her. Ranch is stupid. Dude, at a certain point, somebody thought it was a genius idea, and this wasn't, this was never like this, because I've always been a chicken, tender, chicken finer, Connoisseur and at some point Some idiot thought it was a good idea To start serving it with ranch

Yeah That wasn't like the thing And all of a sudden now people Want to give you ranch before they give you Like barbecue or honey mustard or something And I'm like you're fucking crazy Like what have you done? This is supposed to be On stupid gross salads

And now you're trying to give it to me with chicken Fuck man I'm very I'm actually This is actually like remarkable I'm very conservative I don't think anybody here really understands how rare of an occurrence this is. Because usually I'm the

weird one for not liking ranch. Like I'm usually like, oh, you want ranch? Like, no, no, no. Get me marinero or whatever the fuck. For like, oh my God, what is it? Like, whenever I get mozzarella sticks. People put rent. That's so fucking disgusting. People always like, oh man, I want the ranch. And I'm like, why do you want the fucking ranch? Because they're subhuman. They don't deserve the

fucking air they breathe. They need to be put in a chamber. It ruins the flavor of shit. Dude, I felt, I felt so weird for so long. because I didn't like ranch. If you like ranch, let me see if I can word this as hurtfully as possible.

If you like ranch, the reason why you feel all the pain you do is because you choose to accept that that's what's going to happen to you. It is your fault. Why you're hurt. That is why. You have led to this

and you deserve what you're now receiving if you like ranch. My girlfriend, runs this thing to this and I know she likes ranch and I'm saying this to her I hate it Real talk you got you sometimes you got just be real about it It's so disgusting dude

I don't like I don't like any sauce At all period I don't like ketchup I don't like mustard I don't like fucking I like I like stuff I like like like broths Like if you're cooking something in something Then I are fine with that But even like wings like I low key like regular wings more

like I like honey barbecue But I like regular wings more I like honey barbecue wings Like I would just eat plain wings Like the wings that I made But I also like your plain wings too Like your standard wings Those are good as well Yeah yeah

Well look look man Here's the here's the thing Here's the thing about And this is I never got around to this But I was gonna do it Because I was gonna save America It was the

I was gonna have a show Called Tinder Quest And what it was gonna do Is I was gonna go All the chicken tender places Every place that sells them Around SoCal And I was gonna just taste test

And tell people Because that's the safe to eat thing at any place You go to a seafood restaurant They usually love chicken tenders Because there's some people that like seafood So the one thing was And the biggest criteria was that your shit's got to taste good Without fucking sauce

That's the most important thing Like there's this Louisiana chicken spot in L.A. They're pretty much around L.A. It's the one thing that like I always feel weird when they offer me Barbecue or Ranch I don't need it There's so much fucking seasoning

In their batter Like you don't need anything else And I feel like there's a lot of these new fucking places that are springing up, these hot chicken places that are just abominations because it needs sauce. They make their shit. And like a lot of times, like, even like the little bit of hotness they have with it, it's just, I'm just be real, it's just white people shit, man.

Oh, damn, bro. It's like lightly accented. But I'm like, dude, whoa, I don't understand. It's like they put, it's like they put salt and pepper on it. and then just shook all of it off. And then heat. Add spice. And it's like spice isn't a flavor.

Spice is an accent. I feel like that's why I never really liked sauces. Because I'm not really that big on ketchup and mustard either. Like I think of ranch ketchup and mustard, like I'll have mustard maybe. Like on like a hot dog or something or like maybe a sandwich I'll have like maybe maybe I'll have mayo. Like if I don't know what's on there and I'm already eating it and it's like all right well whatever But like I've never had to like all the chicken that I've had all the beef that I've had every bit of meat that I've ever had has just always been like seasoned to the point where like I don't really need Yeah anything like this tastes great and everybody's asking me like you're gonna eat that dry and I'm like yeah it tastes fantastic

Yeah because it's really good Yeah every time every time every time I cook my own chicken I'll eat it dry because I just know how to make it where it's not fucking it's not like a Popeye's biscuit you're not gonna choke on it after like a single fucking swallow have you guys see you guys have all seen that video right

in the Popeye's video where it's like oh a Popeye biscuit and he dies reaching for the drink I've retweeted it I love that video I'm a Popeye's biscuit I feel like a lot of people

though they kind of eat like kind of like infants. They need stuff to be like they like the whole oh it's dry. I'm like what do you talk like I don't know like I feel like a kid can easily choke on shit because they're just they're stupid. They're kids and like little dumb babies. So I kind of get where you want things to be more lubed up. You want them to have easy to swallow stuff.

And I feel like as an adult I'm like I don't need that. I've I just I don't know man. I just can't get over the ranch thing really I've mastered eating I've mastered it I just think people confuse dry with doesn't have sauce on it because I can make

I can make anybody chicken that tastes really good and it's really moist and it's not dry at all but it's also not drenched in sauce you know like that's possible and the fact that people just think it's like oh you need

you need to put ketchup on it how are you eating the question that I got that fucking blew my fucking mind was, I can't remember when I got this because I sealed it away in my subconscious. I couldn't even tell you who said it

to me because I probably would never talk to them again. But it was like, how are you eating those fries without ketchup? And I just because they're fries and they're good. I like fried potatoes with salt on them. It's so ridiculous.

Are you a crispy fry person or are you a a soft kind of wiggly, disgusting. Who the fuck wants soft? Soft? Soft? Soft fries? Look,

I know people who, I know people who like soft fries. Do I know them also? Yes. Are they, am I close with them? If, I can't tell you.

Ask around. Am I gonna insult them? If you like, look, look, look, if you, just get mashed potatoes. Exactly. Why the fuck,

why would you get fries? They're fried. That's the whole point. If you eat soggy fries, if you eat soggy fries, dude, you might as well get your fucking jaw broken, dead serious, man. Yes, I do. You might as well end up in a fucking hospital, bro. Oh, I hope, I hope, I hope, I hope you get falsely, I hope you get falsely diagnosed that you're going to end up in a wheelchair. So you just say in a wheelchair until your legs get atrophy.

Because you think you belong there and you don't belong there. I can't Look man People just don't They just There's oh man Because it's one of the It's the one of the things

Why I don't I don't like a lot of these delivery Delivery places Because they don't accommodate For their fries So they don't have containers That have holes in them That'll let the fries breathe

Yeah yeah yeah By the time it gets on Condentation it gets off soggy I feel you Yeah it they don't do The only place I can get fries from There's a burger, but it's almost like I'm so lazy. I should just go right down the street.

I'm talking about it's just not even a half a mile away from me. But I'm just like, fuck, I'm going to get postmates. I'm going to have it bring it to me. That's the only place I can get fries from because it's so fucking close. Yeah, yeah. The closer, they are, the better because your fries will not be sitting in a bag, a fucking knotted bag full of steam. And they won't be, yeah.

I don't know. Like, I know people who like soft fries and I'm just like, I can't fathom. I just don't understand. I just don't understand the purpose at that point. I feel like at that point, I should have express permission to just take all your fries and mush them into garbage. Like at that point.

Turn it into a fucking ball and then throw it at them. Yeah. And like the whole ketchup thing, man, it's ketchup does not, like look, ketchup is extremely sweet. It's jelly. And those are people that really love salt and sweet stuff. And like to me, it's not, that's not my normal mode. Like, I want, my potatoes demand salt and that's it.

Yeah, exactly. And they're delicious. There's very rare exceptions where I'll, like the cheese curts and caramel. Like that shit is really good. But it's such a foreign taste is why it's so good. It's not like, it's not saying I would eat all the time, but it's like such a combination. They'd be like, oh, wow, that's crazy. Yeah, but for fries, like, I'm not going to be dipping fries in my, like, I know people

who like do the whole, like, they dip the fries in the milkshake thing and it's like, listen, man. That's like fightable. That's fightable offense, man. I've seen shit like that too. I get it, but I never do it. It's like, I remember once I had, I think five guys was doing this, where they had, you could get a milkshake, but you could get bacon bits. Bacon, bacon.

You could get, like, bacon in the milkshake. And I remember, I remember doing that once, and it was actually really good, but I never got it again. Because it wasn't like that good. It's just not what you normally do. But look, I'm going to, and I understand, look, it's not that I hate the whole, like, oh, my first. fries and the shake thing because I also do understand it because it's basically reminiscent of breakfast. Yeah. Because breakfast, you get cake, you get the batter and usually you have maybe some hash browns or something with it. It's very similar. If you ever have it now, and I'll,

and I'll say I once had a, I once had a Belgian waffle in Greece and it was, it was a la mode, so there was ice cream on top of it. I'm sorry, it was the best fucking thing I ever had in my life. Now, they don't do miscible syrup over there, but they have like this chocolate shit that's like Nutella, but it's better. And then they put like some other, and I was just like, This is, I get the whole idea, but it's not something that I, I'm not searching for it over here. I'm not getting a waffle and slapping ice cream on it and shit. But what makes? Okay.

I get it. So you guys saying that you guys understand the taste of those things, but you guys still can't accept that pineapple pizza is delicious. It's very different because pineapple does not, pineapple didn't look at it. So cheese and pineapple are so completely vastly different on the spec. It's delicious, dude. It's not even. Taste wise, taste wise, it is literally delicious. Yeah. I agree with you, Chris.

It is delicious. You guys, you can't. Have you tried it? It's really not. Have you tried it? Of course. And I get pissed off when there's this extremely highly acidic citrusy thing on my fucking cheese. You literally, you get cheese, ham, pineapple, bro.

Fantastic. I love cheese and ham. They're very greasy and salty together. Works wonderfully. You put this hot. Look, man, there's other fucking fruits you can put on there that aren't so highly acidic and fucking obnoxious. I think that's why the pineapple works for it is, because of how acidic it is. No, it's, it doesn't.

It's one of those things where, it's one of those things where you guys are like kind of just. Success starts with your drive. An American Public University is here to fuel it. With affordable tuition and over 200 flexible online programs, APU helps you gain the and confidence to move forward. Whether you're changing careers, starting fresh, or pursuing a lifelong passion, our programs are designed for people who never stop. You bring the fire, APU will fuel the journey.

Learn more at APU.apus.edu. I've got Dan Morgan here on the pod. Say hi, Dan. Hey, how's it going today? It's going good, man. Tell us who you are and what you do. I'm Dan Morgan. I'm an attorney and a managing partner at Morgan and Morgan,

which is America's largest. law firm. That's pretty awesome. I think I saw billboard of years recently. It said 20 billion one. 20 million is an insane number. Yeah, 20 billion recovered. It's actually, I think, somewhere north, probably closer to 22, 23 after this year. And each year we get bigger and batter and our army grows. So the number will hopefully keep getting bigger and bigger as time goes on. Awesome. So how does someone get in contact with Morgan and Morgan? What would I do if I got into an accident? Probably the easiest way is dialing pound law. That's pound 529 from your cell phone. We are always open. Our call center is always waiting to take your call. 24-7, 365. Wow. Dan Morgan. From Morgan and

Morgan, America's Large Injury Law, from, thanks for coming by the show. Thanks for having me. Visit furtherpeople.com for an office near you. Forcing yourself to like some bullshit. I'm not. I know it tastes good. I know what things is. Look, look, look, look, I'm not going to brag, but I'm a pretty competent cook. I can cook pretty I see fucking well. I'm not the best. Like you like pineapples and cheese together. I'm not the best cook, but I can cook.

If I'm going to cook food, it will taste good. And that tastes good to me. Like, it just tastes good. I might not eat it all the time. It's not going to be that plain slice. For me, when I get pizza, I'm getting a plain slice of pizza with nothing on it. That is my optimal kind of pizza. That's it, you know?

Pineapple. I'm telling you, man. You know what I like pineapple with? I love, I love orange. Oh, man, you put some orange. dice a little bit of apple you know you get me you start making like a little cocktail

kind of like a tropical punch type of thing delicious the last thing I want to do is pour some fucking cheese in that shit that it's so stupid it's not bro it's so dumb look look it's so fucking stupid

one day you're gonna open your eyes to how good it tastes and I'll be here the ossee way you know what the equivalent no I'm not because what you're saying is is like and there's I know there's psychopats out there that probably put sugar on their fucking fries That's how I see

That's a different That's a whole different thing It's not that different It's not that different It's not that different It's the same What did you just You guys just

You guys just say It's the same fucking thing First of all First of all First of all First in foremost Potatoes are starches Which are naturally sugary

That's to begin with All right Not no Not fucking Flavory sugar It fucking converts to sugar It turns in a fat You asshole

It's kind of sweet It's kind of It's like bread. It's kind of sweet. No. There's some fucking potatoes that are sweet. All right. Most of them that we concern.

Sweet potatoes. Sorry, are not. Look, sweet. Look, it's good. You can, look, people agree with me all the time because it just tastes good. It does. Yeah, because there's a lot of psychopaths out there. I understand.

You guys are preventing yourself from stepping into the next level of having. No. See, this is what you're doing. You basically are putting water and oil together and be like, this belongs. No. This is supposed to be together. No. Water and oil.

are not complimenting taste. Savory and sweet compliment each other, though. Water and water and oil just don't don't work together. That's the whole point. They don't compliment each other. They do. That's the whole thing.

Tell you what. No, they don't. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, they don't. They don't, but you're fucked up sense of taste likes it. That's all it is. Okay. That's why it doesn't fucking, look it.

That's why nature naturally makes some stuff salty, like peanuts. And then there's other things like fruits that are sweet. And then people are mashing them together. Because sometimes they compliment each other. Not always. No, they don't. No, here's, let me tell you.

Look, I'm just going to say this. Sorry, Chris, and then I'll let you go. This is what's happening. Because naturally, you want to satisfy the cravings of sugar and salt. A lot of times after people eat something very salty and very savory, they want to have dessert afterwards to get the sugar. So you have a lot of assholes that just mash that together and they think they're eating something that tastes good, but their senses are being satisfied at the same time. Oh, my God, you're trying to fucking pseudoscience me in a thinking this is not.

It's not even close to being pseudoscience. There's a reason why chefs literally say those are complimenting taste. Sweet and savory. Those chefs are assholes. Sweet and savory do compliment each other. They literally do. They don't. They literally do.

No, they're two. No, no, you know what? No. You know what compliment? Look, salt complements beef. You understand how that works? I understand how that works. That's how that works.

Sweet compliments savory because it allows you to taste the both at the same time. That is a thing. That is why there's... That's why there are so many literally culinary artists that are like these things go together. Yeah, and those people are pieces of shit, dude. Like, do you know how much... There is so much to look at it. Now, I know food and taste is very subjective, but there's certain things.

It's kind of like where somebody can make the argument. that oh literally like waste excrement shit from your ass is not like just a bad thing because there's there's some people out there that enjoy it they think it's a delicacy for whatever fucking reasons there's people that make that argument what i'm saying is to me shit is objectively bad it's waste and it's one of those things you can scientifically talk about how it's just a detriment to you and it can get you sick if you keep breathing in the few blah blah i don't need to go into all that But my whole thing is I feel like regardless of the science and how things really kind of work together, there's always people that are going to go against the grain. And there's going to be a lot of people that just say, I love this.

I think it tastes amazing. I think it accents this. I say those people, you do you. But I think objectively you're wrong. I wonder if there's like a gene to this. Because like there's a gene, there's like a cilantro gene where like some people just don't like cilantro. And some people think it tastes like soap or whatever. Do you say soap?

Do you think it tastes like soap? Look. I don't think it tastes like soap. I think cilantro just like cilantro. I think it tastes like a leaf. So here's the thing, because cilantro is a mint, so it's very, it has a very powerful taste. And to some people, and this actually kind of lends to your argument more, which this is why I didn't want to bring it up, is that some people's taste bloods are wildly different. So the people that like the abomination of salty and sweet

can be tasting something completely different from us normal people. So that's probably like what's happening. I just have an evolved sense of taste. That's all it is. I can truly taste everything. Or you're still catching up. Like a Christopher Reeved sense of taste. Well, you can't taste the air.

You can't taste the air around you? Nope. You don't really? The air around me tastes like blueberries. I don't taste the air. You don't taste air. You don't taste air. You don't taste air.

I can taste it. You're colorblind. You're probably like seeing taste that aren't there. You see, I'm colorblind. That's why I can taste air. It's a tradeoff. It's like if you go blind, suddenly your sense of smell becomes like 10 times stronger than a dog's.

You know what's crazy? I have a cousin who literally progressively went blind and he was like, I'm just blind. That's it. Ain't shit. Don't shit work better. I just have to rely on other things. It's not, nothing works better.

And I'm like, damn, that's crazy. If you go blind, your smell gets better. No, you just have to rely on them more. That's it. No, that's not how that works. That's literally how it works. No, you don't go. I can't break a blade against my eyes and destroy my fucking corneous and shit.

And then be like, well, you haven't tried it. I can smell nuclear warheads. Like, what the fuck? I don't become daredevil immediately. That's exactly how that works. Can you imagine if someone's just like Pop some boat out The fewer senses you have

I could smell my fucking neighbors cooking down In a windstorm In a up fucking draft windstorm There's people in this building Approximately 78 Eyes out And snap You fucking cut the cords

And then immediately you can smell Fucking the burger joint That's a mile away from the house Oh my God You can hear a woman have an order gas him three miles away, bro. The fewer senses you have, the stronger you are. Is typically how it works.

You get rid of every sense but your sense of feeling, and you were just running around demolishing the pale. You're bulletproof. You age slower? That's just a fact. But, like, honestly, let's tell you what, listen, I'm in New York right now. I'm in the best place to be getting pizza.

Okay. So tomorrow I will get Live stream it Against my Against my better judgment Live stream it All right

I'll live stream I'll be there too You should show up too jackass We'll all be in a stream Just team together And we'll talk about it I'll fucking I'll order

I'll go half What is what is Is it Hawaiian? Yeah Hawaiian Yeah yeah It's good Hawaiian pizza What is that though Is it literally just pineapple?

It's pineapple ham and cheese No it's yeah that's it Okay Look, man I'll get a half- I'll get a half-Hawai and I'll get a half Peparoni like I always get Yeah, but see

You gotta see some of the Some of the fucking pieces of pineapple I'm gonna touch your pepperoni You're gonna be pissed off I'm telling you You'll be fine, you'll be fine dude You guys like you see You sound like a toddler

You sound like a fucking toddler Hold on, hold on, hold on The thing with pepperoni is that pepperoni is so potent In its taste that it like It like obliterate Like pepperoni overpowers everything else It's super salty That's why it's a

Huh? So salty. The oil from pepperoni completely changes the chemistry of the mozzarella man. Yeah. Like it tastes, that's why it's such a different thing. Having a pizza without pepperoni is fine, but it's just like, it's not like that flavor. The pepperone doesn't even need to be on it anymore. Like I could toss the pepperonies after they've been baked onto the cheese.

I don't know. I think it's cheese, man. An optimal, that's a cheese slag. slice is literally the best thing on the planet. It's just so perfect. It's such a perfect existence. Add the fucking oil from the pepperoni, then we can talk.

I've had pepperoni sizes all my life. You know, I think I probably get pepperoni more than I get cheese. But if I'm just going to eat a pie, I'll just have a plain pie. This is fine. This is a perfect thing. I can definitely eat more of a plain pie in one sitting

than I can pepperoni. Because pepperoni is very, like, acidic, and it's very, like, you know, like, like I, when I got here, dude, I've been overdosing on pizza for like a lot Like since I've been here And the other day I just bought a whole pie And I like parked in like a Walmart parking lot

And just ate like I think Maybe like half Of the pie with a like No no no I ate like three fourths of it There were like three left There were three slices left There's pepperoni and I was like I'm in pain but god damn

I don't regret this at all Oh my God I want pizza so fucking bad God damn it I'm craving fucking I want a pie with pineapple And I want ranch sauce Like instead of fucking Instead of the tomatoes

Like Ranch under the cheese That's so fucking disgusting You fucking monster Ranch under the cheese And I want diced fucking Fucking no no I don't even want a diced

I want the pineapple smashed Fucking I want somebody to get a fucking meat cleaver You fucking pigmy Marmuset asshole Fuck you You gotta fucking That's so disgusting

And then I want it fucking I want it like just get like raw dough and stick it under it and it'll be kind of like Chicago. And you want to like, I don't want to bake it on. I don't want to lay down and come on your fucking forehead too. You want to fucking round it out.

Oh my God. Yeah, just finish with fucking. Fucking holy shit. Moving on. Forehead onto my pie. Hell yeah. Moving on. Palm Joseph Watson wrote in.

Nice. Says greeting future victims. That's scary. What is something that's happened to you that sounds like it's made up because I'm not gonna do this this is like should I do this is like I feel like this is something we should prepare for a situation like this

huh what's the time stand probably like not that far into it 134 it's not bad I just don't know what my answer to this would be but I guess I'll read it anyway Palm Joseph Watson wrote and he says Greetings future victims what is something that's happened to you that sounds like it's made up

because of how ridiculous it is alternatively just make up a story because that would just be it would entertain it's just as much I'm not going to make up a story I don't know. That doesn't make sense. It's too specific. Oh, I know. I know one.

I know one. So there was one time that with me, Jalen, and Marco were hanging out in New York City, like really late. And you were just, again, Brooklyn going bar hopping, right? And then like we were, you know, this is we were all single and we were much younger. And so we were idiots, horny, dumb kids doing stupid shit. And one of our friends, Jalen was dancing with a girl right. And a girl walked up to him, got in the way, like, she has a. boyfriend and pulled her away and I was like I've never really seen that happen before

I've never actually saw that happen before and I was like and then Jaden was just like what do I do but I was like I don't know and then it happened to me later that night the same thing and I was just like what the same exact thing I was another another girl coordinated another girl no it was a different place a girl just walked he's like she has boyfriend. I was like... Then why's she dancing with you? Why is she here? I don't know. I hate that shit.

This is... Women, man! No, hold on. This is like the thing, it's like... Just, this is what, like, I don't know if you guys have ever been out on Valentine's Day, but it's the worst thing that you could ever imagine.

Because it's just all of these couples, and they just take up all the space. You can't go to like a fucking, you can't go hang out someplace because it's just going to be fucking obnoxious. I don't even

take my girlfriend. Anytime I've ever had a girlfriend when I've during Valentine's Day, I've never taken them out on Valentine's Day. I always be like, listen, we're going to go like two days after or two days before. We're not going to go on Valentine's Day because it's fucking ridiculous. Yeah, it sucks. Traffic's absurd. The fucking restaurants are overpriced.

A bunch of bullshit. And it's for dumb reason. Yeah, but you're supposed to look, man, you're a man, so let me, let me tell you this. That's, you can't do that. Too bad. No, it's not too bad. This is how, this is how, this is how you don't stay in a relationship because women care about Valentine's Day. It's not for men at all.

That's not even a little bit. Well, then it's not for me then. That's insane. Like, it's true, no, I just said that. Yeah, it's not for you. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

It's not going to do it. It's for your woman. What happens is this? All right. That's bullshit. So, look, you don't have, hold on. I just I just want Look at this smug fucking look at that face

If you're fucking listening He has a punchable face right now I'm just saying bro I'm just all I'm gonna say is Fair enough you don't want to go out You fucking put on a fucking show at home But you can't be this two day after That's what I do

Usually it's like I cook like a chicken farm or something It's not good enough man It's the day It's like it's like oh I'll get you I'll get you later I know it's your birthday right now, but I'll get you later. It's kind of... No, a birthday's different because it's not everybody's birthday at the same time.

It's not to them, motherfucker. It's not to them. Yes, it is. And I may sound, and I may sound sex as fuck, which is fine, but, like, literally no man gets fucking... Like, where's, where's, where's, where's, where's, where's, where's, where you just get state and get your dick suck? It doesn't exist. Look, look, okay, look, all right. What you want?

I have been in a relationship for many, for... I have been in the longest of my friends. I think I've been in the long relationship at all, my friends. Success starts with your drive, and American Public University is here to fuel it. With affordable tuition and over 200 flexible online programs, APU helps you gain the skills and confidence to move forward. Whether you're changing careers, starting fresh, or pursuing a lifelong passion, our programs are designed for people who never stop. You bring the fire, APU will fuel the journey. Learn more at APU.APUS.edu.

you. I've got Dan Morgan here on the pod. Say hi, Dan. Hey, how's it going today? It's going good, man. Tell us who you are and what you do. I'm Dan Morgan. I'm an attorney and a managing partner at Morgan and Morgan, which is America's largest injury law firm. That's pretty awesome. I think I saw billboard of years recently that said 20 billion one. 20 billion is an insane number. Yeah, 20 billion recovered. It's actually, I think, somewhere north, probably closer to 22, 23 after this year. And each year we get bigger and badder and our army grows. So the number will hopefully keep getting bigger and bigger as time goes on. Awesome. So how does someone get in contact with Morgan and Morgan? What would I do if I got into an accident? Probably the easiest way is dialing

pound law. That's pound 529 from your cell phone. We are always open. Our call center is always waiting to take your call. 24-7, 365. Wow. Dan Morgan. From Morgan and Morgan, America's Large Injury Lawfirm, thanks for coming by the show. Thanks for having me. Visit for the people.com for an office near you. All right. I cannot stand that bullshit that Valentine's Day is not. I'm a part of this. I don't, I don't understand like me and my girlfriend recently got an arguments about weddings. Because she was like, I've been dreaming about my wedding my whole life. And I was like, I don't give a fuck what you've been dreaming about. You're not marrying yourself. You're marrying me. So some of it is going to have to be somewhat of a compromise. Some of it is

gonna be mine, you know? I would, I would do the whole 50-50, but I know that since you're a woman, you're not gonna let me do that, you know? You're just gonna be like, no, it's my wedding, and everyone's gonna agree with you. And I'm gonna say, be like, I'm not gonna show up. But. Just get like a stand-in, get like a fucking friend of yours to some. Stubbing. Hey, Kinks and can't make it.

He says I do and stuff like that. I'm not going to give you a kiss, but here's a recording of him giving you a kiss via iPad. And that's it. That would be amazing. But like I just, I, Valentine's Day, and my girlfriend understands it, you know, because she understands that at least Valentine's Day is both of us. I give her a gift. She gives me a gift.

You know, we give each other gifts. We kiss, we hug, we go out, we eat like this Valentine's Day. We went to Manhattan Beach. We went to the water, what you call it, we bought pizza. It was a fantastic time. We had a great time. It was great. We even split it, you know?

On Valentine's Day? Yeah. In Los Angeles. Yeah. It was a bit of traffic. I would rather die Like I would rather die in traffic Than do that

Excuse me But it's really not that bad Chris That's a thing You see like Think of it like this Okay If you love someone right Think of all the dumb shit

Your parents What's that for you You see? Yeah you see you're foreign It's foreign to your brain You gotta sit down You gotta think So like for me

It's like yeah I'll take her out I'll go with her We'll do whatever she wants I'll pay We'll see We'll have a whole bunch of things You know

We'll have a whole great time To go into it But it's I never want to hear their shit as like it's for her because no it's not if it requires a relationship to happen it's not just for you well valentine's day is because it's certainly not for me it's it's not for you but it might be for me look it's not the colors everything about it it's there's nothing designed market because you know it's a whole marketing wait a minute hold on he just said something that's concerning

you like you like valentine's day i like that day yeah what i like it is that possible are you okay? I like Von. It's just, it's just a, what to call? It's just like a moment. Well, he's very feminine. Yeah, sort of. I'll be teetering, but it's a day for me to spend time with my girlfriend. And it's, if it's special to her, it's special to me. So I like it, you know? That is so alien to me. How is that alien? I just don't, I cannot get behind something that is so just purely stupid. Like, just having this day. It's like, it's like, it's like, it's It's like the ring thing.

It's like the ring how like, oh, the ring needs to be like X amount of money. And it's like, fuck you. You're going to get a ring pop probably, you know? Yeah, absolutely. Or you know what? Hold on. Or you know what? I'm going to get like, here's cubic zirconium.

And I'll tell it. I'll say it's like, this is a cubic zirconium ring. This costs $200. And the money that I would have spent on a ring can go towards a down payment on a fucking house or like an actual thing that can be used to set up a fucking proper future. Come on, man. Yeah, absolutely. Yes.

At least get her moizen night, man. At least get her moizen night. This is why there's no female CEOs, man. They'd rather buy fucking rocks. Okay, that's crazy. But the thing about me is that what you call it. You have to understand what's more important, you know? You got to understand what's more important.

Like, if. I actually agree with you for once. It's weird. You got to be like, you got to be like, yo, look, this is, like me and my girlfriend, unfortunately, I love her to death. She started watching a show called her marriage or mortgage, right? and I was just like This is so fucking stupid

But I had to be there She was helping me in my homework She's really good at math And I'm not always the best at math So I needed her help So she were watching it And she was like Well you know

And marriage is supposed to be something Like yes but they're offering you a fucking home I'm taking a home over a wedding That should be 100% every time That should not even be in the ballpark of a conversation Yeah That should not Obviously the house

You should not even be thought about. I saw a meme. I saw a meme that said there was like three different answers. It's like, which would you rather have? A, have sex with whoever you want. B, get like, what was it, $10 million or $7,000 a week for the rest of your life? There was A, B, and C. And I was like, why the fuck is A even here?

Like, why is it, how is that even close to a B or C? Because people don't be getting any pussy. Clearly people just don't get any pussy. They've never had vagina They've never had sex with anyone They never even got a little dick on the side Like most of us have They've never done any of that

So they're just they just think That once you have sex with somebody Your life's gonna change All that's gonna happen is you're gonna really realize Like oh yeah this was awesome This was not awesome Or this was just it's it's me Good and bad

And so it is I guarantee you The woman you've been fantasizing about Like as far as that question For A Whoever it is some like you know huge pedestal celebrity chick or something, I guarantee you the sex is going to be bad.

Like, I guarantee you because you're not going to be, it's not like in a thing where it's like, you're on the same level, and it's like, all right, let's hook up and this is going to be fun. This is going to be like a totally different,

I can't even imagine, like, imagine being like you're just barely having sexual experiences and then someone, some girl that you're like, oh, uh, that you're just crazy about.

Like a dream girl. Yeah. She just shows up and she's like, like I want to ride your face right now. Like, there's no way you're going to be like, this is going to be an amazing experience because you're going to be like, number one, I can't believe this is happening.

Number two, like, I'm going to probably bust immediately, whatever, or you're going to be too, like, nervousness for me is like such a terrible way to go into sex. So I just feel like it's such, be such an objectively bad time. Sex is the only time I'm not nervous. I'm panicking every other moment of the day. Well, I also don't think you've been in that scenario.

though. I've had... Where it's like the... That is true. I've had sex with girls that I've been like, oh, this girl's really, really hot, and I pursued her. And, like, I was kind of like shocked when I got the chance to sleep with her, you know? But at the same time, that's just vagina.

Opposed to, like, life... $7,000 a week? $7,000 a week? Imagine every day you look at your bank account and it's every Friday, there's just $7,000 more dollars. Yeah. That's why it's such a weird. That that meme or whatever must have been created by like a fucking

13-year-old. There's a-a-be-had to be some sort of dude. There's a fucking sniff, girl, sees that when they get up. Like, one of those fucking, just like, like, one of these people that have never even, they've never seen a non-animated breast. Like, they, I can't understand that.

Yeah, I don't know. Yeah. There's, I'm right now, I'm looking at a picture. Now, this is really fucked up. Obviously, it was tweeted by Smokey. I'm looking at a picture that's a guy holding his girlfriend and $20 billion and they're both off a ledge And it's like

And it's like I'm choosing my girlfriend Because I truly love her with on my heart But at the same time I also don't want a person's life on my hand Like I don't want to have to know I killed somebody And I just dirty money You didn't kill anybody

Yeah you did Yeah it's gravity piece of shit Yeah But at the same time. The ground and or water killed. But the same time, if you don't absolutely love someone, like if that's not your parents, if that is not someone that has engraved their place in your heart, then that's not a question. It's not a question.

Look, man, that's actually a good litmus test for real, though, because maybe you kind of think of it this way. if you're with somebody and you would easily drop them for that money, you probably shouldn't be with them if you think about it. $20 billion? I would not drop a lot for $20 million. That's crazy. Here's the thing, man. It's kind of the thing that they say,

all is fair and love and war because of the way those things make you feel. War, when you want to kill somebody, you're going to do whatever you can to survive. And love, it makes you kind of in a certain way that you act so fun. fucking irrational. Warren lover, the same thing. And if you love someone that much,

you probably would be like, oh yeah, I could really use that billion, but I can't imagine living without this person because of how fucked up an infectious love is. It's not infectious that love is that, what you call it?

It's a simple. It's pretty infectious. Oh, it is. Love is, love makes people do the dumbish. I'm pretty sure every major problem has ever existed ever in the planet ever is because someone was in love with someone else and they just neglected something

and then something went wrong. I'm sure every single time in his three. That's what it was. Yeah. So it's technically everything's women's fault. But I digress. I'm sure Ava Braun's like, hey, kill all these niggas and I'll give us a pussy and he's like, done. Done, done. Say less. Done. Don.

Finished. I did it. And I quote, done, nigger. And then he fucking got it. That's his quote. It's the last words in MindComf. Minkgo. Gotcha, nigger. Nigger say less. Listen, listen.

These niggas is gone. I think we're severely underestimating what $20 billion is. Don't get me wrong. Yeah, I would get mad. I'm like, I should have dropped you, bitch. I should have let you go. I would definitely say that at least once or twice

when I get really mad at her. But at the same time, I'd be like, honey, you know, I get mad and I say dumb shit, but I didn't let you go. You know why? Because I do love you. I do. Hold on.

Here's a little bit of a counterpoint to this. Okay. Okay. You lose the $20 billion. You save this girl. Yeah. You will never, ever be on an equal playing field at that point. Success starts with your drive,

and American Public University is here to fuel it. With affordable tuition and over 200 flexible online programs, APU helps you gain the skills and confidence to move forward. Whether you're changing careers, starting fresh, or pursuing a lifelong passion, Our programs are designed for people who never stop. You bring the fire, APU will fuel the journey. Learn more at APU.APUS.edu.

I've got Dan Morgan here on the pod. Say hi, Dan. Hey, how's it going today? It's going good, man. Tell us who you are and what you do. I'm Dan Morgan. I'm an attorney and a managing partner at Morgan and Morgan, which is America's largest injury law firm.

That's pretty awesome. I think I saw a billboard of years recently that said 20 billion one. 20 billion is an insane number. Yeah, 20 billion recovered. It's actually, I think, somewhere north, probably closer to 22, 23 after this year. And each year we get bigger and badder,

and our army grows. So the number will hopefully keep getting bigger and bigger as time goes on. Awesome. So how does someone get in contact with Morgan and Morgan? What would I do if I got into an accident? Probably the easiest way is dialing pound law. That's pound 529 from your cell phone.

We are always open. Our call center is always waiting to take your call. 24 7, 365. Wow. Dan Morgan. From Morgan and Morgan, America's Large Injury Law, from, thanks for coming by the show.

Thanks for having me. Visit for the people.com for an office near you. You will always have the upper hand, and the relationship will always feel like if there's a fucking, there's a problem. Because she's going to be like, I'm never, I'm just, he gave up $20 billion for me. I'm fucked.

And that's going to fester, that'll fester, and then you'll eventually have a problem, and then you're going to break up, and then not only you're going to not have your girlfriend, you're also not going to have your $20 billion. Chris, Chris, Chris, let me hold you back. Let me put some water on you. Cool you are, okay?

This is real. Not every person is crazy. Some people would just be like, oh, they cared that much about me, you know, that they're willing to do that, you know? And, and let me finish it for you. And you have the power over the woman now. Well, no, that's rightfully so.

You have it. That's exactly where it needs to be. That's what the balance needs to be. Exactly. But what I'm saying is she's going to be so appreciative that she'll start a fucking only fans and break in fucking 10 grand a month for you. That's not going to happen. What's going to happen is there's going to be.

It's more likely, it's way more likely now that I gave off $10 billion for the chick. There's 20. 20. I mean, after a billion doesn't even matter. Honestly. Yes. You're just rich forever at that moment. What do you want?

What do you want? What do you get a billion dollars? You're probably going to be rich forever. That's just invest. Let's just like take a million dollars and invest it. And then you come back a year and a half later after spending only like maybe a billion dollars if you're reaching and you have $20 billion in the bank again. You're like, whoa. Listen, man, that sounds like a like a bad soup to me.

That sounds like it's going to get rotten. You sound like someone who's never experienced love before. Yeah, dude. You sound like you sound like you sound like you sound like. someone that would dress up as Darth Vader in their 30s. Now, I've experienced love plenty of times. That's the problem. I love my hand.

I love my hand. What you mean? Yeah. I mean, yeah, I do. I do. No cap. Low cap. My hand game is crazy.

I'm not going to go, friend. Last question. The last question comes from Papa Jesus. What up, boo? Papa Jesus wrote and he says, What's up? Shrill voice, stutter and inconsistent morality. That is interesting.

That is me. Who too? Because I actually don't know who is... I'm definitely inconsistent morality. You're the stutter, right? Chris? I stutter, but you don't have a shrill voice. Hmm.

Eh, well. Yeah. Whatever. Can any of you recall an absolutely terrible section of an otherwise great game? For me, it's the opening of oblivion, which all you really, which you all really owes.

it to yourself to play since you throw Skyrim so much. Listen, I've played Oblivion, all right? It's fine. I think I know who this is. I feel like somebody like message me like fucking going hard on the paint. No, sorry, I was just saying somebody messaged me going hard on the pain on oblivion. I feel like this is the same person. Probably. Oblivion's like, oh, you're not giving, you're not given

oblivion the love that it needs. And I'm like, what? Like, I don't know, man. Listen, Oblivion hasn't aged as well. It's just true. Oh, yeah, definitely. You know, Skyrim barely aged well. You know, barely I think people swear by the like The main story or some shit

Something like that Scaram only aged well if you didn't play it Twice If you played it on more than two consoles You can't play it anymore But if you played it on only one console Or like once you get to the third time You're playing on a different console

You can't do it Like I played Skyrim happily on the PS4 Played it on the PS5 It's fine Try it on a switch I was like, this is horrendous. I can't even imagine. I can't do this.

I almost bought another switch because of that, but I was like, dude, there's no, I saw like, I was like, there's no way this is going to port, but this is going to be fucking, yeah. It's just one of those things. I was like, fuck, man. Skyrim's, I got to own everything that Skyrim's on, and then it'll be a masterpiece at some point. You'll have the whole tight Skyrim fucking painting. They put Skyrim on the sure SM7B. You know, this capture card has Skyrim, dude

You're finally awake I don't know, man Isn't there an Alexa version of Skyrim? Isn't that actually real? The Alexa Skyrim? That fucking... I think it actually is. What?

Yeah, I think there's like some kind of Skyrim experience that you can play on Alexa. Hey, also, you know, you mentioned the SM7B. I just want to say if anybody's trying to build their credit, I fucking shot up 100 points by buying this particular mic with a credit card Just if anybody's looking at cost you I need a mic and a camera too actually

Yeah well I mean Just make sure you're responsible and pay your shit But I mean it really it really helps It really helps to be an adult You want to hear it's really funny The second time for me Second time for me it's happened Second time

I haven't made any purchases at all Because I when I first got my credit card I spent too much money on it And it was first first I had like a few late payments and I was like I don't want to do this anymore. So I paid up my credit card. That one got canceled because you know it got delinquent obviously. Got canceled.

I was like you're not. I understand. That makes sense. I get it. I got another credit card. I got like a like two between two and three K limit, right? Spent maybe $50 in the last like two or three months and they canceled it. And I was like, why did you cancel my car?

They were like, Mr. Jameson, you weren't spending enough. And I was like, yes, because it's supposed to be for emergencies. and it hasn't really been an emergency. They're like, I'm sorry, Mr. Jamison. And they canceled my card. That's the second time that's happened. I'm like, so if I'm not in debt to you, you guys will eventually cancel my card.

Success starts with your drive, and American Public University is here to fuel it. With affordable tuition and over 200 flexible online programs, APU helps you gain the skills and confidence to move forward. Whether you're changing careers, starting fresh, or pursuing a lifelong passion, Our programs are designed for people who never stop. You bring the fire, APU will fuel the journey.

Learn more at APU.apus.edu.edu. I've got Dan Morgan here on the pod. Say hi, Dan. Hey, how's it going today? It's going good, man. Tell us who you are and what you do. I'm Dan Morgan. I'm an attorney and a managing partner at Morgan and Morgan,

which is America's largest injury law firm. That's pretty awesome. I think I saw Billboard of yours recently. It said 20 billion, 1.20 million is an insane number. Yeah, 20 billion recovered. It's actually, I think, somewhere north, probably closer to 22, 23 after this year. And each year we get bigger and badder and our army grows. So the number will hopefully keep getting bigger and bigger as time goes on. Awesome. So how does someone get in contact with Morgan and Morgan? What would I do if I got into an accident?

Probably the easiest way is dialing pound law. That's pound 529 from your cell phone. We are always open. Our call center is always waiting to take your call. 24-7-365. five. Wow. Dan Morgan. From Morgan and Morgan, America's Large Injury Law, from thanks for coming by the show.

Thanks for having me. Visit further people.com for an office near you. This system is so flawed. Oh, yeah, it is totally. It's so flawed. I was like, what? Yeah. Yeah.

I didn't use it for like three months, dude. There's some that are good. There's probably some, but you got to find them. I think most of them are just there to specifically encourage you to fuck yourself. And I think that looks bad on your account. If they get canceled,

because they're not using it. I think that looks worse. I don't know. I don't know that much about it. I hate this country. I can't think of a terrible section of an otherwise great game. I was going to say,

I was about to say, what's question? Otherwise great game. I mean, a lot of people... I can think of a great section of like an otherwise terrible game, which is the very beginning quick time event in Spider-Man 3 for the Xbox 360.

When you're fighting in a sky? When you can fail and body slam the ground and kill that woman in a skyscraper with a bomb? That's such an amazing moment. That's such a great fucking moment. That game sucks, but I love that moment. I love Spider-Man 3. That's pretty funny. It's not a good game.

Yeah, I have a real answer, and it's one that everybody fucking knows. Blightown. Fucking Blightown. You know what, no, actually, I take that, I take that back. blight town is if you're trying to do everything within blight town or ds1 for people that know dark tools um if you try to do and gather everything if you're trying to get the spider armor and everything blight town is a fucking blight as it's called but if you're just blazing through it to get to that stupid quay log the quaylag or whatever the spider lady it's pretty easy just to

tumble down really quick it's very easy actually now the one place that actually i would say is worse than that is the, what is it, the depths or the crypt or whatever? That place that's completely pitch black and those giant skeletons are there. He's hit you randomly in the dark. No matter what. The worst. I hate doing that so much. It's not even, it's just, you can't, the people that can speed run that, bless them.

But I just, it's, I really like that game. As janky as it is, that makes me, whenever I get there, I kind of, stop playing because I just would rather not go through it. It's that fucking shit. What game has a great game has a really bad part? I'm trying to think. It's hard. It's kind of hard.

Because when you play a good game and you're like, oh, this, I like this. It's almost, you kind of forget about the, I would say the MJ part. The MJ part to the Spider-Man games. I just got, I just got something. I just got something. In God of War 2018, there's a section towards the end where you're going, it's like an elevator room. And you're like,

you're just fighting all these enemies from like every single realm that you've been in and it's like really lame and like really unfun compared to the rest of the game because it's so video gaming and like you're just in like a fucking generic box

and I just remember being like this fucking this is really like a remarkably subpar section of this otherwise fucking awesome um extreme filler absolutely I know exactly what you're talking about they do that a lot in the in the god of war series There's like a, I wouldn't say a lot

But I specifically remember shit like that Especially in the first game The very first one where it's just like Oh, it reminds me of like Mega Man X Where you have to fight all the bosses before you fight the main boss Yeah It's like here you go fight all the fucking bosses again And I'm like, oh

It's like a ninja guy in two Where you have to fight every boss at the same time Before you fight the final boss People Anyone that plays Ninja Guy in two for the X-Gyad in two for the Xbox 360 is a masochist. No one enjoys that game because that game is so difficult

and it has really terrible spawn points and it's just not fun. That game made me cry at my friend's house. I was at Jaylen's house screaming at that game. He was laughing at me saying, are you all right? He kept saying, are you all right?

Instead of just like turning off the game or something. Terrible experience. Ninja Guy needs to die out. I'm glad they're not making it anymore. Jesus, fucking Christ. Let's calm down a little bit. Fuck those games. Don't make one for you.

Make one for me. Specifically for you. A Sweeney edition. Hey, uh, Sweeney, stream this for us. We'll give you, we'll give you 20 billion.

Like, 20 billion? You also have to all your girlfriend. You're like, nah. No. It's not worth my mental health. Would you drop Chris Daughtry

off a cliff for 20 billion dollars? I'd tie center blocks. His legs are dropped off a cliff. I couldn't do it. Not to Chris Daughtry. fucking him just as he's falling he's singing it's not over I'm going home

into the place and he hits a fucking spike and he gets a fucking junkie through his head he's like a scarecrow well I got to go listen to Chris Daughtry and I think we're at we're at about that point in the show

where we can start by the way my voice is getting quieter because I have people like in the next room now who have gone to sleep but if you liked what you heard today consider

consider supporting us over at patreon.com slash the snark tank you know you want to right? You know that eventually you will like if you're listening to us for free you will eventually just go over there so you might as well just do it now we're going to avoid it

we'll take what we want which is you we'll take you like we I'm not even asking really this is just a friendly suggestion before the inevitable happens I'll show up in your house and I'll grab your son and run You gotta make a choice at that moment

He will I've seen him do it But in case you need any persuasion One dollar a month gets you early access to every episode $5 a month gets you A question read on the show $10 gets you access to our Discord That is $10 once and you're in for good And $25 gets your name

dyslexically read At the end of the show Which I will now Set up for because I forgot to do it. But... Oh, show's ruined. By the way, we're over a thousand patrons now.

That has happened before. Usually, like, people will come in and people will siphon out at the end of each month. But we just passed... We're at 1,0001. Wow. That's pretty sick. Oh, Patreon more like Patriot Slung.

Nice. That's exactly what I was going to say. Really? Yeah. No. Oh. Thank you so much, people. and hopefully we continue to grow get you a better show

and trance to get bigger than Joe Rogan Yeah honestly fuck that guy Honestly fuck Joe Rogan Like fuck that guy Anyway count me count me down Three two One Pre-Raz

A tiny Asian man Parker Lukenbach Come man the man of come Blake 896 Pinyap Vivo The Epic Ashawat, designated divorce paper delivery dude, silly putty eater in the name of a In the name of the dyslexic wombat, the big peen and the holy sween

OG two-tone, the Crenshaw mafia blood, Ace Man, fucking kill me. Every time Chris says subscribe to Dr. Purple on YouTube, I pee a little. I was surprised to see Kingston in some of Smokey's videos on her only fans. That's got to stop. That's got to, that's got to stop. That's got to stop. Holman Brown 98. Diego Andres. Andrez Hernandez.

Hey boss. Can you follow me on Twitter, please? Ray Luchesse, Ryan Luchesse, sorry. Obama named his dog Bo to fuck with Biden. Holy shit. That's dark, man. That's pretty.

What's fuck, Bo? Come on, Bo. Bo? Put some peanut butter on my bald, Bo. Come here, Bo. Come here, bro. You want to bomb Syria, too, Bo? Slashy Scout, Atrosone, Hideo

Kajima screaming the N-word on top of his... On top of his... All right, it's at the top of your lungs. It's at... The correct phrase is at the top of your lungs. Not on top of his lungs. While promoting his next video game. Quivering Cloaca.

Tom Sweeney, the atrocious alien fucker. Please check out my podcast called How Did We Even Get Here Every Thursday? Leroy Jenkins, Kingston Kicking Kids, help. I was walking outside with my pants down and tripped into some pussy, but now my girlfriend won't talk to me. I can't help you with that. That's a rough situation. I've been there, but like, you know, I'm not going to tell you how I got out of that.

I can't even begin to, I can't. That's not my problem. I'm sorry. Derek, you look like the take on me video, bro. Yeah. Oh my god Halo woe times three Hard hat skydiver

Stephen Crowder's dress that he doesn't let his wife wear That's so funny Chris has a high voice for a lesbian Absolute wagon Lord Gavin Pustule Pop Ophelia Ew Yabbid domestic abuse I was cock blocked by a turtle

Alaskan oil field trash Chris would be a twink if he was raised upstate. Lieutenant Lippton's famous Teabag facials, Lovecraftian, Tomsock, not an FBI agent, Juan Punchman, Marcus Shorten, Mr. Fuck, Jim Crow's daddy issues, abusi, Chris Promise to drop Tom's nudes at 10K,

Papa Nurgle, Governor Arnold Schwarzen, NWord, Danny DeVito's perfectly preserved penis, I let Paul touch me, murder ascended, David Connolly, the sexic that feels Chris's pain, soon to be ex-gay, Dave Rubin sliding into Jeanette McCurdy's DM. Ex-gay.

Hey. Can you imagine Dave Rubin was never gay? He was just joking. He was just telling a really bad, though. At this point, it wouldn't surprise me. At this point, like, it was just the long con. That would be the only thing I would probably respect. If he kept that up for that long, he married a man.

That's wild. Yeah, that would be pretty cool. That's dedication. Lobotomize Jesus is my drooling divine savior, Haco, Moto Zealot, Hey, you, you're finally awake. You were trying to cross the border, right? Walked right into that imperial ambush. Same as us.

Heroshima, spicy mushrooms. Adam Carolla, sippin' cola, sniffing yolas, bang and cholas, and shoutin'yolo, Derek's unyielding sex drive, dummy thick Dave, heartless wretch, aka the black man from Staten Island, Uncle Tony's Pizzeria, an abortion clinic, where today's loss is tomorrow sauce, Dan Schneider, the Hyman Divider, Jackson Absege, Badly Brave, jolly old dipshit, Hugger, Derek, the Movie Theater Assistant Manager, Ethereum Mrs. Butterton, Gromicon, Chris Gait my Progerian hunting ass, deflated left ass cheek, all hands on dick, Arrow, sunny chance.

I'm back in the will after Chris's voice made my mom flood the living room and dad rip his pants with a monster erection. Richter 86 and rounding off our list of top tier patrons. The god. The god. No, the king. The king. Of haphazard. And that's as much as I can take.

I've gone two hours without listening to Daughtry. And I just don't know. This is the longest I've gone. You know? So I've got to get back to that. I think I'm going to post dotry clips on Twitter with no context when next few days. We should do a cover of a Dodtery song. I'll be vocals.

We should. But it has to be like an exact cover. I'll do it. Like not like not fucking around at all. No, it's proper. I would 100% do that. And it would be hilarious. And then Daughtry just, I was like, hey, Sweeney, your vocals on that song really touched me.

Thank you. And I'd be like, wow, we were trying to be assholes. Chris Daughtry comes back from the grave just to compliment you? He's not dead. Are you sure? Yes. I mean, I don't see how he couldn't have won a Grammy then. Good night, everybody.

I'm out of you. Success starts with your drive, and American Public University is here to fuel it. With affordable tuition and over 200 flexible online programs, APU helps you gain the skills and confidence to move forward. Whether you're changing careers, starting fresh, or pursuing a lifelong passion, our programs are designed for people who never stop.

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