The Snark Tank - #71: Fight Night

Episode Date: June 11, 2021

YouTubers are boxing again, Gorillas vs Bears, Jeff Bezos fucks off to space, Samsung fetish fuel, and more nonsense on this episode of The Snark Tank! Don't forget to eat your vitamins. Advertising I...nquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

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Starting point is 00:01:02 Selection varia for place to agotar existences. Hey, look if it will dead me. Hey, everybody. Welcome back to another episode of the Snark Tank podcast. It's me, Chris. I'm here with Derek. I'm here with Sweeney. We're still doing this.
Starting point is 00:01:40 Yeah, you're just going to stare? stare at the fucking, what are you doing? Sweeney, I was going to come on the podcast, but you're an asshole. I'm Keith David. Something like that. I didn't get that at first. Yeah, it's not, you know, I don't got it down on the way, but I think I got the cadence down. Private Allen.
Starting point is 00:01:56 It's definitely not incorrect. It's not the best, but you'll get there. It peters out. Everyone has moments of sounding like it peters out because only he has that voice. Exactly. He recently had a birthday, so happy birthday, my niggoo. Happy birthday, Keith David. All love to the most high.
Starting point is 00:02:13 God bless you, Keith, David. We've got a lot to talk about since we didn't go last week. So there's a good amount of, well, there is an exclusive solo episode on the Patreon where a Sweeney answered some of your questions, which is great because now I can do my next one. So that'll be coming soon. There's exclusive, load them up. Yeah, there'll be exclusive solo shows. on the Patreon if you're interested. But, man, what do we even want to start with?
Starting point is 00:02:45 I assume the big thing, the most recent thing to happen, this Floyd, Mayweather, Logan, Paul, fight, or, I mean, fight is like a pretty generous word to describe what that was. It was a fight. It was this. Jamberie, something like that. It was a bonanza, but I call it a fight. I don't know.
Starting point is 00:03:10 It was a, I saw the whole thing. it was a fight. I think it was a, it was a, it was a, it was a spar. Let's be real. I saw one clip where Logan just didn't stop flailing. Yeah. Oh, the button mashing. Yeah, the button mashing sequence where like, I was just like, what the fuck is happening? And the rest of it I saw screenshots of just them hugging the whole time, which, yeah, Logan, Logan was hugging a lot. That's all he does. There was a lot of Pride Month memes associated with, with the, with the match. Yeah. Floyd, this isn't you.
Starting point is 00:03:43 That was my favorite one. I think I saw, I think I saw like 40 of those jokes in a span of like 10 minutes on Twitter. And I was like, yep, okay. They hugged a lot because that's what boxing is, apparently. I don't know, man. I didn't know this fight was even happening until it was like maybe 10 minutes from completion. Oh, same. Like, I thought this would have been a bigger deal than it was.
Starting point is 00:04:11 But it just wasn't. Well, it wasn't because Logan, no one gives a fuck about Logan Paul right now. He's not doing anything to garner hate. Like, say, everybody's talking about Jake Paul because he's being an asshole and he's, you know, talking shit to the MMA community. There's a huge thing going on over there.
Starting point is 00:04:30 Logan's not doing anything. He's not even saying anything. Yeah, he's not even saying anything controversial on his podcast. He's just having a regular podcast. So nobody gave a fuck. So the point where I took a nap, I woke up and checked my Instagram, and there's this fucking weirdo name Hardcore Nick, or Hard Rock Nick, sorry. Hard Rock Nick on Instagram. He's fucking, he's a trip. And I only remembered the match because he was like, oh, I'm, see if you can see me in the crowd or some shit. And I was like, wait, it's Sunday. Because I would assume, oh, fights are on Saturdays. So what the fuck? Like, I didn't think there was anything on Sunday anyway. So I damn near missed it too. and yeah and and who gives a shit it was a it was a fight
Starting point is 00:05:14 Logan Logan had a strong first round because he was doing a lot he was doing a lot the first round well he knew he had to he had to that was his only shot but what happened was after that Floyd was playing with him was playing with his food because every time Logan got hit Logan would like realize
Starting point is 00:05:32 oh shit I'm fighting a probably the best one of the best boxes of all time so he would hit him and Logan be like, oh shit, because Floyd would just go into the pocket because he knows how to fight. He's like, I'm not going to entertain this guy's range. I'm just going to push up on him. Floyd hit him. Logan would be like, oh, shit.
Starting point is 00:05:48 And he'd, you know, start trying to swing sporadically. And then Floyd would be like, all right, I'm just going to go in again. Because Floyd looked perfect after all eight rounds. And Logan looked bad in like the third round. Yeah. I mean, he's over 200 pounds when he's fully, you know, hydrated, completely gassed for trying to fight somebody like him. I mean, when you, when you, anybody that has any understanding of like, boxing or sparring during rounds, you, with three minutes, it sounds like, oh, that's just
Starting point is 00:06:17 three minutes. It's, but it seems like fucking forever. Like after a round, you're like, holy shit, I'm kind of tired. That's, it's fucking crazy. Yeah. Think of how fast fights stop in actuality. Lately, car buying has become a pretty dull experience. But on eBay, behind every car in part is a story waiting to be shared.
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Starting point is 00:07:09 to finish it. eBay has thousands of cars and is the largest online selection of vehicle parts and accessories. eBay. Things people love. I've got Dan Morgan here on the pod. Say hi, Dan. Hey, how's it going today? It's going good, man. Tell us who you are and what you
Starting point is 00:07:27 do. I'm Dan Morgan. I'm an attorney and a managing partner at Morgan and Morgan, which is America's largest injury law firm. That's pretty awesome. I think I saw a billboard of years recently that said 20 billion one. 20 million is an insane number. Yeah, 20 billion recovered. It's actually, I think, somewhere north, probably closer to 22, 23 after this year.
Starting point is 00:07:48 And each year we get bigger and badder and our army grows. So the number will hopefully keep getting bigger and bigger as time goes on. Awesome. So how does someone get in contact with Morgan and Morgan? What would I do if I got into an accident? Probably the easiest way is dialing pound law. That's pound 529 from your cell phone. We are always open.
Starting point is 00:08:06 Our call center is always waiting to take your call. 24-7, 365. Wow. Dan Morgan. From Morgan and Morgan, America's Large Injury Law, from, thanks for coming by the show. Thanks for having me. Visit furtherpeople.com for an office near you.
Starting point is 00:08:18 Like, I'm pretty sure I've never had a fight more than, more than maybe three minutes. Maybe. Because fights don't last that long. Yeah. For me, nowhere near that. Nowhere near that. It's definitely like half a minute.
Starting point is 00:08:30 Yeah, fights are quick enough for, you know, to speed run in, like, you know, compilations. Yeah, yeah, exactly. Yeah. So I respect Logan for doing what he did. So wait a minute. So who won?
Starting point is 00:08:44 Well, so first of all, there's no judgeings because nobody would sanction it. Nobody would sanction it. So there were no judges. But Mayweather definitely won. Like, if there were judges, they couldn't sanction it because of how stupid it was. Mayweather is 44 years old and he weighs less than 160 pounds. they just wouldn't sanction it. They wouldn't because usually you'll do like a catchweight when it's so different.
Starting point is 00:09:07 But it's way too different to nobody wanted to sanction it. So they didn't. They couldn't have some fucking guy there though. They couldn't have at least some guy being like. They had honorary ESPN or Showtime people do it behind the scenes. Like if we scored it like say it would have been like, you know, Logan was down pretty much. He didn't win any rounds essentially. Like so maybe he won some.
Starting point is 00:09:29 I don't know. I don't think he did. The people. Some people assume that he may. once because maybe he did a little bit more in the beginning but if you even if you run the if you run it back a little bit and just watch it so damn near got knocked down and this was really interesting Logan damn near got knocked down at one point because he got hit he got hit in the ear and so his equilibrium was gone but mayweather was kind of propping him up anybody else probably would just let
Starting point is 00:09:55 him fall and they would account as a knockdown which made me think that mayweather probably has a lot of money riding on nobody getting knocked down because you know you bet bet on everything. So I bet like he controlled the fight so much to the point where, because he was talking about like, you know, like, oh, who's going to get knocked down? Which round? And that depends on how much money you want to bet. And he probably had his
Starting point is 00:10:15 people bet all this money about no one getting knocked down. And because Logan was about to get knocked down, you'd see him. He's like supporting him. Like Logan's like, oh. It looks like a fucking like Pinocchio or some shit on strings before he's like turns into a gay boy or whatever. And then
Starting point is 00:10:31 he's just like, oh. And I was like, oh, that's crazy. Like, he's completely controlling this one billion percent walking him down. He's walking down a giant. What little man walks down somebody that big? It's supposed to be the opposite. Like, I'm the bigger guy. I'm going to come after you and smash you. It was really interesting. But yeah, Floyd was controlled that whole fight. It was really, it was funny. It's funny watching Logan Paul just realized that he's not a boxer. Like him realizing himself. I mean, surely he knows that. The, the thing that's concerned. confusing. So Floyd Mayweather, he's, has he been like retired for a while? Is that, is that what's, is that a thing? So he came out of retirement to do this thing that wasn't even sanctioned for like no reason. Like I just don't understand what the purpose is. It was an exhibition match. So he wasn't out of retirement. He was just having an exhibition match. Because I'm pretty sure it was for charity. Some of the money was for charity. But it was pretty much like, oh, I'm not going to risk my title fighting this guy that's way bigger than me and just has the potential to if he hits.
Starting point is 00:11:33 me the right way could pretty easily knock me out. So this is a quick sparring match between two people. But he's like a professional boxer. Like, why would he even be, why would he even be slightly worried about fighting Loebuckold? Because you can still get knocked unconscious by somebody that's much bigger than you.
Starting point is 00:11:49 Boxing's fucking stupid, man. It's a fucking dumb sport. They call it the, they call it the puncher's chance, right? Like any slack-jawed yokel could knock out a professional if he just hits the right angle, hit the right button as they say. But here's the thing. One of the reasons why there was never any buzz is because Mayweather, even him being,
Starting point is 00:12:09 Logan Paul being a giant, Mayweather is too good and too elusive to where people are just like, I can't, look, he fought Canello in his, you know, I wouldn't say, I feel like Camel was better now, to be honest, but even when he was undefeated back in the day. He was out of his prime, for sure, but he still destroyed Canello. Who the fuck is Cornetto? C Conello? Oh. Wait, were you being serious?
Starting point is 00:12:41 I forgot his name. I forgot his name. Canelo Canelo Averez. He's the, he's the, the ginger Mexican. Oh, right, right, right, right, right. Yeah, like super Irish looking, but he's like. He's a puncher, bro. He's a bitch.
Starting point is 00:12:56 I like him. He's a beast. I like, I like, I like, I like, he talks too much. He talks a lot of shit. And all of them, we're doing all that celebrity shit. Who? Who? We're talking about Canello? Oh, Canello.
Starting point is 00:13:07 Canelo's got a mouth on him. Oh, he had the audacity to say that. I mean, why wouldn't you? But he said that, like, in his prime, he could have beat Mayweather. And I was like, ah, you were in your prime when you fought Mayweather and you lost, bro. You definitely lost. And I was like, well, Canello's got a little bit of mouth. He is currently the best, though.
Starting point is 00:13:24 He's currently the best. I give him that. In his weight class, he's, he's number one right now. But he's got a slow his role. I mean, he's, I think he's pound for pound without, with Mayweather being retired because he only lost him Mayweather. He's still, he's, he's the shit. But like, who cares?
Starting point is 00:13:40 He lost the Mayweather greatly. But he didn't, he didn't, he didn't, did he lose Triple G? He didn't lose Triple G both of those fights. He beat him both times. Or he drawed him once, I think, right? I think there was draws, and then Candela came on top. Yeah, no, no one cares about Russian fighters. Dude, no one cares about Russia anymore.
Starting point is 00:13:57 They're gone. As far as boxing goes, no, anytime I want to hear about Russia, like, I don't want to care about their bots. Yeah, yeah, yeah. The only thing I appreciated with Russia is wide Putin. That was it. Those wide Putin memes,
Starting point is 00:14:11 I don't know where they came from, but you just stretch it, like just completely stretch footage that's maybe supposed to be like four by three. And then it's just over that weird song and he's just walking. I don't understand it, but I was like, this is, I like this.
Starting point is 00:14:24 That reminds me of the, that reminds me of those, do you remember when, you remember what, you ever stretched out stout scarce when that was like, Yeah. Yeah. Classic. That's classic fucking air.
Starting point is 00:14:38 Or putting to making a bird wave at him, bro. That shit was crazy. It's the funniest new ever dog. Dude, that was a fucking lot. That was a spy bird. Like, how the fuck did that bird do that? It was a bird that knew if it didn't wave back, it would have got killed. So it waved back immediately. I mean, that bird waving is obviously a fake video. But I wanted to believe so hard that that was real, you know, that a bird.
Starting point is 00:15:02 would just completely ignore its physiology and wave in a way that it obviously can't and wasn't evolutionarily designed to do. Yeah, no, I don't know, man. I wanted. People are catching weird shit. Animals doing weird shit, man. There's a video of a of a bear seeing a knocked over traffic cone and then it puts it back in its place. What are you talking about? What are you saying?
Starting point is 00:15:24 A bear like saw that there was some symmetrical, like it was, like, it was, what's the word I'm looking for? it was fucked up. Like, there was some symmetry going on with these traffic cones and it's like, this isn't right and it fixed it and then went about its day. That's wild.
Starting point is 00:15:41 It's just like it's... Bears are strange animals, bro. They are. Dude, did you see that fucking, that teenager pushed that bear that was trying to attack its dogs? Yeah, yeah. Shove the bear, yeah.
Starting point is 00:15:54 Shove the bear over a fence. The fucking a teenager. I thought like, oh, this is probably some mom that doesn't give a fuck about living anymore. But there's like some kid that's like, oh, get away from my dogs and shoves a fucking grown-ass bear. People in my Twitchshod have the audacity after a video like that to say, oh, I would rather fight a gorilla than a bear.
Starting point is 00:16:16 You're fucking out of your goddamn mind. You're crazy. I would too. You don't understand. How would you not? You would rather fight a gorilla than a bear? I'd rather fight a gorilla than a bear. Wait, what's the, what's the, what's the, what's the, what's the, what's the, what's the, what's the.
Starting point is 00:16:34 The problem is Chris, you would rather fight a bear than a gorilla? A bear is a bitch. A bear can be pushed over a fence and be scared away by just puffing your chest out and standing straight up. I know this because I've seen bears in person multiple times and I've never once been afraid.
Starting point is 00:17:00 The first time I saw it, I was like, huh, concerning. And then I remember, literally the basic step-by-step programming as if it's like the way you make popcorn just like oh how to get a bear to leave you alone and then you do that and it does it a gorilla does not have that predictability because it is as complex as we are and it's going to do whatever the fuck that's a stupid thing to say are you're not compared to a bear my guy gorillas most likely just won't hurt you because they just don't hurt people they just
Starting point is 00:17:31 really don't they're like they just don't except for that kid that got dragged through the fucking mud. It wasn't hurt. It literally could have popped it with its fingers. It could have popped its head with his fingers. Yeah. If he wanted to kill it, he could have slapped it and he died, dude. You don't think he knew what he was doing.
Starting point is 00:17:46 He was trying to get some fucking hostage so he could barter away out of there. I wanted to play with them probably. It was probably like, oh shit, look at that. It wanted to play with them. Yeah. Because gorillas are super nonviolent. They would drag you a little bit. Gorillas might be nonviolent, but a bear is a programmed being.
Starting point is 00:18:04 You can just do everything by the books to get a bear to go away from you. You can. I've done it. I'm five foot four. That by all means. I don't believe anything. You don't have to. I'm sorry.
Starting point is 00:18:14 You had a bear going to attack you and then you did what you had to do. No, it's just there's a bear around whenever you go camping and shit in the fucking wherever the fuck we went. We drove some bullshit woods. And there's bears in the woods. You come across them. Lately, car buying has become a pretty dull experience. But on eBay, behind every car in part, is a. a story waiting to be shared. There was a guy who bought a 2020 Porsche Cayman GT4 on eBay. It was
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Starting point is 00:19:15 eBay. Things people love. I've got Dan Morgan here on the pod. Say hi, Dan. Hey, how's it going today? It's going good, man. Tell us who you are and what you do. I'm Dan Morgan. I'm an attorney and a managing partner at Morgan and Morgan, which is America's largest injury law firm. That's pretty awesome. I think I saw billboarded years recently that said 20 billion one.
Starting point is 00:19:40 20 million is an insane number. Yeah, 20 billion recovered. It's actually, I think, somewhere north, probably closer to 22, 23 after this year. And each year we get bigger and badder and our army grows. So the number will hopefully keep getting bigger and bigger as time goes on. Awesome. So how does someone get in contact with Morgan and Morgan? What would I do if I got into an accident?
Starting point is 00:20:00 Probably the easiest way is dialing pound law. That's pound 529 from your cell phone. We are always open. Our call center is always waiting to take your call. 24-7, 365. Wow. Dan Morgan. From Morgan and Morgan, America's Large Injury Law, from,
Starting point is 00:20:13 thanks for coming by the show. Thanks for having me. Visit furtherpeople.com for an office near you. They're half domesticated, like stray fucking cats hanging around a liquor store. It's completely different. Like, they're there, but they know what humans are. Right.
Starting point is 00:20:28 As opposed to going somewhere where fucking Joe Logan and his dumb-ass friends would go to, like, shoot things in the face. were if you encounter one of those things Like trying to like You'll kill you Play dead It's just gonna eat your face off Yeah as opposed to a wild gorilla
Starting point is 00:20:42 Well a gorilla See what a grill is gonna do first Is pound the ground It's gonna slap the ground To be like get the fuck away from me Does scare you away If you don't leave Then it'll up and cut your head off
Starting point is 00:20:51 So it's pretty simple Like no it'll charge you It'll charge you first to get you to run away That's the next step The first thing guerrillas usually do Is they pound the ground It's like the, it's, I always feel like, cat, imagine getting slapped by a fucking gorilla. What do you see is slap the ground and then like all this shit just like, like,
Starting point is 00:21:10 Donkey Kong. Yeah, like, yeah, like, yeah. That one, getting slapped by a gorilla would be so. I want to see a gorilla go to like a club. I want to see a gorilla like go to a club and like, you know, just like, grab this girl's ass, you know, and then this dude comes like, what the fuck? and the girl slaps the guy and his head is completely
Starting point is 00:21:36 gone. His head's completely gone, but the thing is the club is still just going. Pumping. Bumping, bro. This man's death meant nothing to anybody in the club. Everybody's dancing. The girls dance with the gorilla now.
Starting point is 00:21:50 Like, it's the fucking tambourn. Everybody's tripping. Everybody's tripping on something. They probably don't even know that had happened. It's like strobe lights going off. They're like, whoa, do you see that? Do you guys get that hallucination? too about that guy who got killed by a gorilla in the middle of the club crazy right but you know why
Starting point is 00:22:07 people are kind of accepting of it so let me give you the spectro quick right what well what we got here so what happens is that guerrillas are way stronger than they should be for their size size wise gorillas are incredibly powerful so they are stronger than bears bears way more and they're much bigger and they have these things called claws which are knives attached to their hands So, you see, they don't even have to hit you hard. All they got to do is to swing by you, and they have a little bit of range to cleave you open. Now, a gorilla, in theory, is more dangerous as a smarter animal. But gorillas are not hostile.
Starting point is 00:22:47 They're not predators at all. They don't hurt people often. Bears aren't inherently hostile either. Bears are actually super sociable and very chill. That's not true. Bears are hostile. Oh, my fucking God. No, those are bears that often see people.
Starting point is 00:23:00 No, no, bears are so acclimated to people for the most part, the ones we encounter. If we go to like a mountainous area where there are just like bears and like goats and shit, it'll try to eat you because it's like, oh, your food. What is he doing? That's why bear attacks were so common in the beginning of the country. Swin, swing, swing. Hold on, hold on, hold on. Shut up, shut up, shut up.
Starting point is 00:23:20 Are you downloading like 10 fucking terabytes of porn? I'm not downloading anything. Why are you so delayed? Are you not wired? What? What? Is your, is your computer not wired into the... No. I've never been wired. Why are your...
Starting point is 00:23:38 Ethernet, baby. I've been doing this the whole time, bro. So who wins? Yogi Bear or... Or, um... Or, or Girolla Grod, who wins? Girligrida, you see. Guerrilla Grod.
Starting point is 00:23:54 I think Yogi's got some fucking moves, dude. Yogi... Yogi is evlusive. Yogi is cunning. He is cunning. He can trick. He can put bombs in a picnic basket. Daryla Grod went back in time to assault Barack Obama and he just did that.
Starting point is 00:24:10 Like he's not fighting Yogi Bear with any semblance of a threat. But did he actually complete, he didn't actually kill Obama, right? I didn't see the episode. He failed. I'm assuming he failed. Can you imagine that's just part of the flash universe? The Gorilla Grod goes back in time kills Barack Obama? Who the fuck is our president then?
Starting point is 00:24:30 I Gorilla Croticane It was McCain Oh my God I'm sure he'd come to some sort of agreement No No yeah he failed because of Bo and then
Starting point is 00:24:45 But I feel like Yogi Would trick Obama And would offer him A picnic basket Because you know Normally he's trying to steal picnic baskets But he finally got the picnic basket
Starting point is 00:24:57 From Yellowstone Park Or wherever jellystone Or wherever the fuck he lives got the picnic basket and he filled it with anthrax and then offers Obama a sandwich filled with antithras so let me get this straight
Starting point is 00:25:12 what we're doing right now is we're pitting these animals against each other not in a battle of sheer strength or will but whether or not they would succeed in assassinating Barack Obama in the past the 44th president if I'm not
Starting point is 00:25:28 mistaken or 14th. 42nd. I mean, I guess, I guess Yogi Bear would win. I give it to a good rod. Because he's, here's the thing, he's a two-dimensional cartoon character. And they have, they don't, by definition, they're almost not even bound by the rules that bound the rest of us or that bind the rest of us. So I'm going to go, yogi.
Starting point is 00:25:49 They're bound by more. No, they're not. Yeah, they are. He just turned sideways and go invisible. You know how valuable that would be as like a, it's like an ability? that's crazy they can't see it right in front of them they can only see this to the side
Starting point is 00:26:03 which is insane fucking lunatics I'd be terrifying to see 2D people 2D things in fucking in real life that would be just in a 3D space
Starting point is 00:26:13 that's not how that works you're walking down the street and it looks empty until you cross and then you realize the street is full of people walking this way that is a wild scenario that could kill me
Starting point is 00:26:27 That could kill me. That could scare me to depth. You think if somebody runs, a 2D person runs really fast into you? They cut somebody half? Yeah, what they fucking just slice you up? Well, what is the texture of their thinnest? Like, would it be like, would it be so thin that it's essentially a blade? Or would it just be like a really thin, like slab of meat hitting you?
Starting point is 00:26:53 You know? That's a good point. That's weird. So are they like super vulnerable from that angle? Like say... Because there's two dimensions. They have no depth. That means that if you hit them,
Starting point is 00:27:06 you'd be able to pretty much punch through them. But you'd have to hit them from the side. Yeah. It's so weird. What if the wind blows? Can they stop the... Like, can they stop? Like, what do they weigh, you know?
Starting point is 00:27:17 Like, where's their weight at? I think... Oh, man. This is getting too much. This is starting to stress me out. Anyway... This is why 2D things can't exist on 3D plane. That's why we can't.
Starting point is 00:27:25 One thing I will say. One thing I will say, every time this conversation started with the bear and the gorilla, you keep bringing up polar bears. Polar bears are completely different thing. A polar bears are going to discerate you. A polar bears. A polar bear is like a polar bear not only is that thing so removed from anything that's around us, but it's like it's also way bigger and fucking. And starving. Because it's not the other family to eat. And starving. There's no like, there's no, you know, Yahoo answers on how to deal with a polar bear that is reliable enough to actually employ in practice. That is not something you want to go around. Polar bears. Polar bears are like the top. at the top, you know, gorillas. No, they're chill. You give them a fucking Coke. Get them a Coca-Cola, and they'll become your best friend. Try it. Shut a stupid, fucking white polar bear bitch ass up.
Starting point is 00:28:07 All right. Going to water and kill seals. Fuck you. Do you think if you gave a polar bear Coca-Cola, do you think it would react well to that? Are they capable of digesting that? Probably not. Most likely not. It might develop.
Starting point is 00:28:18 What if that becomes its new diet? Like, once you just, it tastes that shit. It's like, dude, fuck these seals. like teal seals tastes like shit i like that coke man give me fucking bear diabetes and shit and then that's that's in its DNA now bear me fucking bear be like and the babies now they they have a like a taste for coke and now they somehow make a ship out of ice to sail to the to the nearest i don't know coke manufacturer can even and then that's it it's new beginnings.
Starting point is 00:28:54 That is a ship out of ice. Yeah. That is the most insane should have making a ship. How
Starting point is 00:29:00 evolution, baby? How effective would that be really? A ship out of ice? If you had if it was, assuming,
Starting point is 00:29:09 obviously, let's assume this is not a fucking engine boat or anything because obviously it's going to melt with all the heat. But like,
Starting point is 00:29:16 theoretically. Eyes is really boignant. So in theory, I guess, that might work. Boinient? Yeah,
Starting point is 00:29:23 boignant? Aboyant? My bad. Boignant. It's really good at floating ice. Yeah. No, yeah, yeah, yeah. It'll be good. It'll be like if they just make, just get a giant glacier and then they carve it out into a boat.
Starting point is 00:29:37 That seems more likely. Yeah. And they release whatever sort of fucking thing is frozen in the glacier. Ever caught a disease or some shit? It's frozen in the glacier. And they sail it to the mainland. For Coke. For Coke.
Starting point is 00:29:49 And then they just see fucking all these polar bears. rating the coke factory in fucking Tennessee or wherever the fuck it's at. I think it's in Georgia. Taring people the fuck up. Taring people to fucking shreds. That's a whole. They cut someone open, pour coke inside of his stomach and eat his introos. That's scary.
Starting point is 00:30:11 That is real. Remember the fucking, uh, the scene from Model 1 for 2 when you're in Washington, D.C. Like, I picture that when it's like just everything, you're actually trying to get into the White House. I picture just that, but bears. You know what's funny? I only know about that scene because I used it in the video I did
Starting point is 00:30:34 about the Capitol Hill Riot, where I was like, they make video games about trying to break into this place. That's how hard it's supposed to be. But, uh, oh my God, just desert,
Starting point is 00:30:44 just a fucking blitzkrague, bro. Just straight forward every bear, even the little ones. It's just running straight towards the Coke factory. The little ones are the scariest ones because they could fit in places where the big ones can't. You know, they're crawling through the vents.
Starting point is 00:31:00 It's like a sea. It's like a flood. It's like fucking, uh, what is it? A what? Lately, car buying has become a pretty dull experience. But on eBay, behind every car in part is a story waiting to be shared. There was a guy who bought a 2020 Porsche Cayman GT4 on eBay. It was well loved.
Starting point is 00:31:20 There are plenty of Caymans in great condition on eBay. but this one needed some work. That's just the start of the story. So after this guy gets a great deal on his dream car, he rebuilds the whole thing with all these parts he found on eBay. Performance brakes, suspension, body panels, the works, guaranteed to fit. Next thing you know, this nearly scrapped Cayman was out there on the track as a full-blown race car.
Starting point is 00:31:43 You're ready to go, daily driver, your next Restamod. Hello, Lotus Alon, and the parts to finish it. eBay has thousands of cars and is the largest online selection of vehicle parts and accessories. eBay. Things people love. I've got Dan Morgan here on the pod. Say hi, Dan. Hey, how's it going today? It's going good, man. Tell us who you are and what you do. I'm Dan Morgan. I'm an attorney and a managing partner at Morgan and Morgan, which is America's largest injury law firm. That's pretty awesome. I think I saw a billboard of years recently that said $20 billion. $20 billion is an insane number. Yeah, $20 billion recovered. It's actually, I think, somewhere
Starting point is 00:32:24 north probably closer to 22 23 after this year and each year we get bigger and batter and our army grows so the number will hopefully keep getting bigger and bigger as time goes on awesome so how does someone get in contact with morgan and morgan what would i do if i got into an accident probably the easiest way is dialing pound law that's pound 529 from your cell phone we are always open our call center is always waiting to take your call 24 7 365 wow dan morgan from morgan from america's large injury law from thanks for coming by the show having me. Visit furtherpeople.com for an office near you.
Starting point is 00:32:57 It's like the flood, but little bears. Little tiny bears. I can't even imagine. The premise of seeing many, you know what it is? The idea of many polar bears together is literally something that I don't think is even possible. Like, I don't even think that has ever happened.
Starting point is 00:33:17 Because they're so isolated. Yeah, they're such isolated animals. So the thought of them putting aside their differences and sailing together is horrifying because they're so violent and desperate and hungry that like there's you can't reason with that this is why it's not like it's not like these black bears that are just like total bitches or these uh what are they what are the
Starting point is 00:33:41 are they brown bears or black bears which are which are the ones both there's both like i've seen them like up close and in person they just sort of like they're just like i don't know i've never seen you before but I'm gonna go. It's kind of the vibe I got from every, I think I've seen like three bears in my life up close in person. And I forgot what you're supposed to do,
Starting point is 00:34:04 but like there was a thing that you did and they just, they would just walk away. You make yourself seem big is what I always heard. I've never seen a bear in person. Yeah, but it's not, I mean, I mean, I was probably even less than 5'4 then, so that's, I don't even know how that even works, but we'll see.
Starting point is 00:34:21 You might have seen, because I know black bears are the smallest ones, if I'm not mistaken. And they're the ones that people usually push around like get the fuck out of here. But then there are the big brown ones that sometimes they'll wave at you. Like I don't understand. Like bears are so halfway towards being pets. It's scary.
Starting point is 00:34:39 Yeah. Like they're like, they're like maybe like one or two generations of us really trying to like make them pets before you can go buy a bear at like a fucking, a breeder. I don't think that's accurate. But bears are fucking enormous. So, I mean, I know what you're saying. They're like weirdly sentient in a way that
Starting point is 00:34:59 like a lot of animals aren't. Like the fact that they can wave and put traffic cones apparently back where they're supposed to be and ride bicycles in Russian circuses. That stuff is like, you know, that stuff is wild because you're not going to get like a Caboto dragon to ride a tricycle, you know? You're not going to, you know, every Russian has a bear. I want to see that so badly, though. That would scare this shit out of me. That would scare the fuck out of me, dude. It should. But. You know, that's, they're not trainable. They're trainable in weird ways that, like, is not common with a lot of animals.
Starting point is 00:35:30 So, like, in my opinion, I wouldn't say you're ever going to get a bear and a fucking breeder. They're just too big. But you never know, dude. But you're never, here's what you're never going to get. A fucking gorilla. Oh, absolutely. Because a gorilla will probably find its way out. Gorillas are smart.
Starting point is 00:35:47 Yeah, they are smart. And they're also strong. And they'll probably be like, hello, mommy. And then they'll hug you. And then you're fucking suddenly, you're spying. goes numb. They don't do that. They don't do that. They don't do that. But they're like, they're too, because people live with gorillas. Like people live with gorillas. No, that's like not fake. Like people go and they spend
Starting point is 00:36:03 time with guerrillas like in the wild and in sanctuaries. That's like a real thing. Yeah, fucking Tarzan, dude. Come on. Oh yeah, Tarzan. Not like, it's not at like a hundred percent like not kidding, not joking. It's true. Even Jane Goodall drew the line at chimpanzees, you know? That's the chimpanzee woman. She drew the line way too late, but still, yes. By the way, chimpanzees, way smaller than gorillas, fucking weak as hell in comparison.
Starting point is 00:36:33 Just will scrape your face off like the cream of an Oreo. Just, there it goes. Now you're a fucking homunculus. Now look at you. A chimpanzee will smack you in the back and you'll die, bro. Now you can't open your iPhone because it won't recognize you. And it's all because you fucking hung out with that chimp. Are chimpanzees taller than gorillas?
Starting point is 00:36:55 No. Because I think gorillas are bigger, but I don't think they're as tall. What is Christ? They're definitely taller as well too. Yeah, because I don't remember how tall are good. Because I know gorillas have really, really, really short legs. Do you think chimpanzees are just slenderman? They're thinner, they're thinner, but I thought they might have been tall.
Starting point is 00:37:13 I could be wrong, though. No, that would be terrifying. Like, if chips were, like, just as tall as, like, humans or some shit? They're nearly. No, they're not. They're not nearly. Okay, put average size of chimps. So five feet tall, average grill.
Starting point is 00:37:28 A chimp is about like, what is it? About 3.84 feet tall is a chimp. Yeah, okay, never mind. All right. Yeah. And a great ape is fucking certainly not. It's five feet. Put a silver bag.
Starting point is 00:37:50 They're about five. They're only five feet tall. That's crazy. Well, yeah. Their legs are pretty fucking small. I mean, that's the only thing. Like, if their legs were as big as their arms, imagine that shit. Imagine that shit, dude.
Starting point is 00:38:04 They'd fucking be very tall. They would have won a race evolution. They would have won an evolutionary race, and they would have been like, they would have been gorillas. But. But here we go. How tall is the tallest gorilla six foot five? That's crazy. Wait, what time period was that, though?
Starting point is 00:38:26 Shot in Al-a-Mongo, which is the place, modern Kibu in May of 1938, fucking six-foot-five gorilla. Murdered in cold blood. I just see that. Fucking, when was basketball invented? Murdering cold blood by some, by probably some white dude, by some fucking white explorer that fucking couldn't do,
Starting point is 00:38:48 couldn't survive a hand-in-hand fight, got killed this job. Gigantic gorilla. I don't know, man. It's a murder. Maybe, maybe it was a bear. Maybe it was yogi. He just got, dude, they literally killed fucking Bigfoot.
Starting point is 00:39:03 Like, that's, that was the fucking Sasquatch. And he shot it in its face. And it's like, oh, it's just a silverback or some shit. And it fucking had, like, it had a name and necklaces and shit on it. Yeah, it's just a silverback. It had a silverback with a homemade vest on it. And an ID. It had a fucking.
Starting point is 00:39:20 It had a, fucking. fucking Air Jordans. He was carrying fucking fruits to his family and he blew his fucking head off. What do you do
Starting point is 00:39:28 in this hypothetical situation? You're walking through the woods. A gorilla is dead in the woods. It's a six foot five gorilla.
Starting point is 00:39:33 You look around you notice that it's holding a wallet. It has an ID in it. It's a, it's his ID. And it's like
Starting point is 00:39:44 state of Utah or something. It's like, it's some fucking like an officially licensed gorilla. Is it naked? Is it naked? Uh, yeah.
Starting point is 00:39:52 Or is it clothes? It's a, I mean, it's a gorilla. It's naked. It's hairy. It's naked, but it's naked, but essentially it's covered. It had its wall, like, and it's fucking, like, black fucking gorilla. Yeah. I'm like, whoa, fuck, dude.
Starting point is 00:40:06 Yeah. I wouldn't want to leave it. I would have to bury it. I'd have to go get a shovel and, like, at least bury him. That's it? I'd be like, yo, this thing lived in Utah and no one gave a fuck over there. They just photographed. it and issued it a fucking like an actual identification number.
Starting point is 00:40:24 I would love to have to have the the means and like equipment to just make fake IDs. Like because if I could just like if I lived in upstate New York still because there's so many like dead deer and shit, I would have definitely been the person if I had the free time. It's like, oh, a dead deer. Take a photo, make a fake ID planted on it and just like let somebody else find it just to see the bewilderment. You plant You cut the deer And you fucking Somehow with enough time
Starting point is 00:40:56 You make it seem like It's a pocket on the deer They're checking the deer And they open a wallet With like $15 like a few cards A receipt And then a fucking ID It's a Quiznos
Starting point is 00:41:08 A Quiznos like A Quiznos like uh A Quiznos card Yeah It's got like He had seven stamps He was so close to getting A free Quiznos sub
Starting point is 00:41:15 In his wallet It says On my way to Quiznos honey Or it says Why would he say that? Why would it say it would say it with his wallet? And like a little note in his wallet. And you're like, what the fuck?
Starting point is 00:41:28 Photo of his children. I was going to say, yeah, a photo of his kids and fucking like just a family portrait. Like that picture that they did with the death row or whatever where it's like all black. They're all wearing black and like that perfect portrait. I would, there's no way. I'd have to be this has to be like a marketing stunt. Like that, that when they did the. Space Odyssey?
Starting point is 00:41:52 They did that 2000. I don't know. I don't know. What was the whole thing, the 2001 Space Odyssey thing that they were moving around? Remember that? That happened last year, I think.
Starting point is 00:42:01 That fuck, because you know, in 2001, there's the, the, what is it, the, yes. Yeah, and you're talking about the obelists
Starting point is 00:42:07 that, like, the ones that, like, popped up across the world or whatever. Who fucking did that? You know what that was for? That was for Auntie Donna's big old house of fun, which was like this,
Starting point is 00:42:17 I swear to you, it was just for this fucking Australian sketch comedy, show. It meant nothing. It's a good show. It's a very amusing. I love that show. But it's also like, why the fuck did you? There's a video of them putting it up. So those obelisk things everybody was freaking
Starting point is 00:42:31 out about was from Auntie Donnas? Yeah, they put them off. I can't believe that. I can't believe there's a video of them putting it up. I thought it would have been from something else that had to do with something. Those things were just being found all over the place. That's like bananas. Yeah. I thought it was going to be like Arbys or something.
Starting point is 00:42:48 Arbys. It was, well, I should say. say at least one of them was on to i don't know if the whole thing was for that but i know one of them was definitely them they put it up shit like that is why i can't trust i can't trust anymore because you see shit like that and you're like oh this is this might be a sign of something really crazy about to happen and then you find out these fucking australian comics did it and you're like well i can't fight anymore what about um this fucking samsung woman i don't know if she has a name this fucking samsung woman popped out of nowhere i saw her all
Starting point is 00:43:21 over my feed people were like simping left and right I don't get it I don't understand it I cannot fathom how we went from nine foot tall vampire like big titty lady to this them alien eyes man like people are really into the just those giant doll anime eyes that look totally fake and creepy in my opinion but people are really into that shit man And like, that's, that's what, that's what the Sims want these days. They want women to, like, sew their eyes open as far as possible. And then they're like, now, now you look real.
Starting point is 00:44:04 Now you look like, now you look acceptable. I just don't want any more women. I just don't want women anymore. Just take them, take them all away. Go somewhere. Like, go far. Like, go far, far on your side. And I'll stay on my side of my bros.
Starting point is 00:44:20 and we'll get drunk and kissing shit. Like, go away. Like, go off. Go off. Well, maybe they're geniuses. Because what if it was some, like, huge busty-titted chick and maybe people would have overlooked it and be like, you're trying too hard. I don't know. Maybe, but this looks like an iridescent elf.
Starting point is 00:44:38 Like, I just don't understand, like, she's so scary pale and not even like a, not even in like a goth way. Just like in a, like, I'm, I haven't eaten well. for millennia and like i the sun is foreign to me and have i died yet maybe it's just a very like unsettling paleness like i don't know how else to describe it well she she looks like a hybrid she looks like a hybrid of like every tic-tok girl every like uh like she reminds me of a little bit of like she's like every like she like that girl the leader or whatever the hell whatever fuck her name is and tick talk and i mean she's got mom jeans on which is trendy now is it for like yeah it's uh because you know it's always been like women for forever wearing tight jeans and they kind
Starting point is 00:45:33 of went back to like you don't i want to wear pants that are fucking above my belly button and i want them very loose fitting like that's very that's very hot for a lot of people now um you know it is it's It's never been my style, but, you know, I get it. People are retro as fuck. Just take them all away. Go! Go from here. There's already so many, there's already so many foot drawings.
Starting point is 00:45:59 Of her, there's drawings of her feet? Yeah. It just. Wow, the internet works fast. I'll give him that, you know. Yeah. At the very, you know, God bless him. I just want people to.
Starting point is 00:46:13 to live in reality, to be honest. That's all I want. I want, like, the people, like, they simp way harder for, like, fake girls than, like, women that look at atomically correct. Yeah. I'm like, I can, there's a lot of women that don't look real at all that I'm like, oh, yeah, that looks adorable. That's cute.
Starting point is 00:46:32 But there is no, I have no desire to be like, I want to fuck that girl so bad. You know, I don't have that, I don't have that. Well, like the cartoon women? Yeah. There's people that are, they see the cartoons that are like, real women suck. They look like shit. And I'm like, damn, bro. I have seen that.
Starting point is 00:46:52 That was a big meme. It's like 2D, 2D women are better or whatever the fuck. Like back in the, I remember that was a common thing on the internet back in the day. I was like, holy shit. I just, I, it's so fucking baffling. But look, look, I don't even know if it's official, by the way. It's easy to talk to a fake girl than a real girl, I guess. Is it?
Starting point is 00:47:10 They don't talk back, though. Like, it's so easy to talk to it? them, no? Okay, so hold on. Samsung Sam, commonly referred to as Samsung Girl and Samsung Virtual Assistant is an unofficial virtual virtual assistant for Samsung Design and presented by Visual Arts Production House Light Farm in May of 2021. The reveal was followed with memes and horny posting on social media, yeah.
Starting point is 00:47:32 So it's not, I guess it's not like proper. It was, I guess, a pitch to them. Ah. Which is interesting. That's such a fucking interesting pitch to just be like, oh, it's just a person. It's just an elf lady So I just stumbled upon a drawing Where there is a BBC
Starting point is 00:47:49 Coming from the left side of the screen And you can only see the BBC And then it says Can you fix my Samsung pen And then she's holding a Samsung tablet And blushing and like drooling with pleasure Why would the British broadcasting company Be helping this woman?
Starting point is 00:48:09 Yeah I know right I'm not to confuse myself Yeah Yeah that's exactly I too am confused. Black Cock broadcasting. That's a... Big British black cock broadcast.
Starting point is 00:48:22 All right. Well, we got... What is this? Did you hear about what Jeff Bezos is doing? Lately, car buying has become a pretty dull experience. But on eBay, behind every car in part is a story waiting to be shared. There was a guy who bought a 2020 Porsche-Caeman GT4 on eBay. It was well-love.
Starting point is 00:48:42 There are plenty of Caymans in great condition on eBay, but this one needed some work. That's just the start of the story. So after this guy gets a great deal on his dream car, he rebuilds the whole thing with all these parts he found on eBay. Performance brakes, suspension, body panels, the works, guaranteed to fit. Next thing you know, this nearly scrapped Cayman was out there on the track as a full-blown race car. You're ready to go daily driver, your next Restamod.
Starting point is 00:49:09 Hello, Lotus Alon, hand the parts to finish it. eBay has thousands of cars and is the largest online selection of vehicle parts and accessories. eBay. Things people love. I've got Dan Morgan here on the pod. Say hi, Dan. Hey, how's it going today? It's going good, man. Tell us who you are and what you do. I'm Dan Morgan. I'm an attorney and a managing partner at Morgan and Morgan, which is America's largest injury law firm. That's pretty awesome. I think I saw a billboard of years recently that said $20 billion.
Starting point is 00:49:41 1. 20 million is an insane number. Yeah, 20 billion recovered. It's actually, I think, somewhere north, probably closer to 22, 23 after this year. And each year we get bigger and batter and our army grows. So the number will hopefully keep getting bigger and bigger as time goes on. Awesome. So how does someone get in contact with Morgan and Morgan? What would I do if I got into an accident? Probably the easiest way is dialing pound law. That's pound 529 from your cell phone. We are always open. Our call center is always waiting to take your call. 24-7, 316. five. Wow. Dan Morgan.
Starting point is 00:50:12 From Morgan and Morgan, America's Large Injury Law Firm, thanks for coming by the show. Thanks for having me. Visit furtherpeople.com for an office near you. After he retires? What? Gonna assimilate half the planet? No. So this is a real news report.
Starting point is 00:50:27 Jeff Bezos will be flying to space on the first crude flight of the new shepherd, the rocket ship made by his space company, Blue Origin. The flight is scheduled for July 20th, just 15 days after he is set to resign as CEO of Amazon. So he's going to space. He's just fucking off. He's leaving. He saved all that money just not paying his employees. Crazy, man.
Starting point is 00:50:47 Yeah, all to get away. He can't be arrested in space. You know, what are they going to do? The police don't have the funding for that. You know, they're not going to chase him to fucking Alpha Centauri just because he just missed out on paying his taxes for the last, like, forever. They can't hear you screaming space, bro. I just love the idea of this.
Starting point is 00:51:08 I just love the idea of just like, yeah, the millionaires are just going to come here, destroy our planet, enslave us for years, and then like, and then just book it, just leave. Just like the fucking audacity of that is just so wild. Mad respect. Yeah, he just got divorced too, right? You think this is like a divorce?
Starting point is 00:51:27 Was it just? I feel like, oh, maybe not just. Yeah, you're right. I'm thinking of Bill Gates. They're all the same person to me. Yeah, the billionaire. Bill Gates isn't isn't Jeff Bezos. Let's just clear that up.
Starting point is 00:51:41 Bill Gates, it turns out as a fucking weirdo. He's a bit weird, but he's not like a monster. Bezos is like just not a good guy straight up. Bill Gates is like debatable. Like, he's done some good and he's done some kind of fucking. I would argue, I would argue they're probably not all that different in, in personality as far as far as like how good of an individual person they are. But I would say probably Bill Gates contributed more. positively to the great to society in general, I would say.
Starting point is 00:52:17 I mean, he helped fund the vaccines, like a lot of the money for the vaccines in general. Did he? Yeah, but there was also like, yeah, there was also some shit, though, about like patents and stuff that seemed kind of shady. Was that him, though, directly? Or was that the CDC? Well, he's a part of it. Like, since he's part of the funding, it's like, you'd feel like, hey, if you want this thing to disappear quicker, release the patent so people like like countries like India can fucking actually get the
Starting point is 00:52:43 vaccine. Yeah, I think I think he was, I think he was saying stuff like. Was it him? Was it him about a patent? I think it was. I think it was him saying like, oh, I think he said something specifically like, oh, we don't want to share the patents or something. Yeah, there was a reason.
Starting point is 00:52:56 I forgot. I don't know what his reason was, but he was a part of like, you know, but obviously the reason is the bottom fucking dollar like at the end of the day. Like making sure you're making billions upon billions of dollars. you know and staying because that's that's how billioners you know get yeah he's about to lose half of it so I know but yeah isn't he like he's like homies with like Epstein and shit that's like the whole reason why she was like I'm out of here no that was too that's too recent for that to have been for that do you think well no well that's one of the things that came out that she was like it was it was
Starting point is 00:53:32 it was one of the I think that I guess that started the everything unraveling I'm assuming Because that was like one of the big things that people kept discussing that he was way more chill with Epstein than he was leading on, I guess. And it, which is weird. But I mean, it's kind of weird that, I mean, it's not weird, right? The richer you are, the more stuff and get away with. Because there's way too many people on like the black books and all this stuff and all these flights that I'm like, we couldn't get away with this shit. If I was on that flight one time, I would never hear the end of it. Oh, yeah, no.
Starting point is 00:54:07 Oh, my grandma would know. People, people still... Like, what? Dude, people give YouTuber shit for things that are like maybe like 1% as bad for like as for just as long. Like, I'm sure like... I'm going to say this, but I'm going to beep it out just because I don't feel like fueling it anymore. But dude, like, fucking how many, how many years later and people still talk about fucking candid every now and again? That fucking app?
Starting point is 00:54:37 Yeah. Yeah. I got a message from a YouTuber. And I basically was just like, I'm going to say my piece on what I think that is, which is just nothing. I was just like, oh, this is the fallout or whatever you want to call it was infinitely more interesting than what happened. Because nothing happened essentially. It's one of the dumb. It's on the same level of that fucking.
Starting point is 00:55:07 YouTuber, what's his name? John Swan that he got caught lying about Dream, the other YouTuber, about some bullshit. It was the dumbish fucking drama that it was, I was like, I can't believe people are talking about this because, like, I understand that there was, it was to talk, oh, he got caught lying about some shit that he, who cares, why did he even lie in the first place? Like, I'm not to get into all of it.
Starting point is 00:55:31 Somebody got caught lying about something that nobody, the whole dream thing, like, but it's just like, they were involved, like that John Swan and Dream, they were all involved in some drama. And it was the most mediocre milk toast thing. And I was just like, I can't believe this is the thing that people are, or they act like being a hypocrite is, is on par with like murder or pedophilia or some shit. Like that's basically how these people act. It's so fucking weird. It's so weird to me.
Starting point is 00:55:59 I'm like, oh. It's just drama YouTube, you know, they got a milk, they got a milk shit as much as possible. Well, drama's like, I don't have a problem with drama. I'm like, it's like the only equivalent of trash TV. But trash TV usually at least like it does things in a way. It's good at manipulating people to make things seem like they actually matter. Everything I see with like this kind of low grade YouTuber shit, it's not done well. It's, it's I tune in and try to follow along and I'm like, oh, this is this is really stupid.
Starting point is 00:56:34 You can't even get me to care about this stuff. Now, if we're talking about dream cheating, I think that's hilarious. I think that's pretty good because he's so much of a bigger YouTuber. What made the dream thing strange was just the fact that he didn't have to lie about it. Like, no one was mad about it. Like, if he just could have just told the truth. That's what made it so weird. He could have just told the truth and it would have been fine.
Starting point is 00:56:58 I don't even know why. No one was crushing him about him not telling the truth. I don't even know why he would even cheat in Minecraft. He just kept lying about it. He just kept lying about it. Well, he's still technically lying about it. He's still lying about it because he said, oh, I'm sorry, I didn't realize.
Starting point is 00:57:13 And I, that's one billion percent impossible to not realize. Like, if you play a game that has R&G and you know the drop rates of stuff, if you play a game that much, you know the drop rates. It's like me playing raid fucking shadow legends, where I know the drop rates of stuff on like shards and like pooling a legendary. And if I, we're like pulling them like like oh holy shit fucking every third or fourth of my fucking shard pulls i'm getting the best shit when it's normally supposed to be less than a percent
Starting point is 00:57:43 of a chance i would know i would notice immediately yeah can't be like oh i did how do fuck i just didn't fucking realize i'm like you he's still lying like it's such a he's a he's a he's being an ass it's such well he just knows that most of his people uh with the people that listen to him they're all fucking 12 year olds you know what's that's like you know what it's I care so much about that. What's astounding about dream is that this is a person whose name I've heard like a million times only in the last like several months, right? Never before that.
Starting point is 00:58:14 He never came up at all. It was almost like he fucking sifted in here from like a fucking rift in time where he was like a famous YouTuber in some other reality and he just like respawned here somehow. I have never seen a dream video. I don't know what he sounds like. I don't know what his real Twitter account is. I know fucking next to nothing about this fucking person. All I know is that he cheated in Minecraft and that's it.
Starting point is 00:58:42 And that's probably the last thing I'll ever know about Dream as well because I just don't give a shit about these people. That is it. That's what I was saying. That was the original point with that John Swan guy and then that app, all of that stuff where it's such low-tier drama. but people are trying their best to blow it up to make it something that matters. And my whole thing is, let's like trash TV, you know exactly what you're watching.
Starting point is 00:59:12 Now, make some good production and let's just have some fun with it. But don't fucking pretend like it's earth shattering. And that's what I guess what annoys me the most, where like the dream thing, oh, he cheated in speed running in Minecraft. I don't fucking care. Even if I played Minecraft all the time, I'd be like, oh, what a cunt. And then that's, that's it.
Starting point is 00:59:34 It's the communities, man. It's, it's his community. The Minecraft community is really toxic. So inherently, if somebody's saying he's cheated, there's a lot of people, there's a community is really huge. He obviously cheated. There's going to be his fans who are most likely, like, 13-year-old boys and the easiest to lie to young teenage girls.
Starting point is 00:59:51 And they're like, he didn't cheat. That's so, that's so not true. And then what happens is that they all go on Twitter and they type about it, and they just get really loud and annoying, because that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, what it always is it's usually never like a like there are toxic like creators obviously you know know but most of the time the worst part is their fan bases because then they breed these really horrible fan bases that the ones that take shit over the fucking moon and just make it the worst and dream fan base is Minecraft which happens to be very
Starting point is 01:00:20 very gonna say but you know they tend to be of a certain group of certain unfortunate disability or different mental function and they get loud. In fairness, Minecraft is like the most popular game on the planet. So like, yeah,
Starting point is 01:00:40 the, you know, the percentage of people who play Minecraft, even if like one percent of them are like sociopathic lunatics, that's like a lot of people, even if it is like a small percent.
Starting point is 01:00:55 You know, it's just, that's just how numbers work. You're not going to be able to fucking, you know, you can't. Lately, car buying has become,
Starting point is 01:01:02 a pretty dull experience. But on eBay, behind every car in part is a story waiting to be shared. There was a guy who bought a 2020 Porsche Cayman GT4 on eBay. It was well loved. There are plenty of Kamens in great condition on eBay, but this one needed some work. That's just the start of the story. So after this guy gets a great deal on his dream car, he rebuilds the whole thing with all these parts he found on eBay. Performance brakes, suspension, body panels, the works, guaranteed to fit. Next thing you know, this nearly scrapped Cayman was out there on the track as a full-blown race car. You're ready to go daily driver, your next Restamon. Hello, Lotus Alon, hand the parts to finish it.
Starting point is 01:01:43 eBay has thousands of cars and is the largest online selection of vehicle parts and accessories. eBay. Things people love. I've got Dan Morgan here on the pod. Say hi, Dan. Hey, how's it going today? It's going good, man. Tell us who you are and what you do. I'm Dan Morgan. I'm an attorney and a managing partner at Morgan. Morgan, which is America's largest injury law firm. That's pretty awesome. I think I saw billboarded years recently that said 20 billion one. 20 million is an insane number. Yeah, 20 billion recovered.
Starting point is 01:02:16 It's actually, I think somewhere north, probably closer to 22, 23 after this year. And each year we get bigger and badder and our army grows. So the number will hopefully keep getting bigger and bigger as time goes on. Awesome. So how does someone get in contact with Morgan and Morgan? What would I do if I got into an accident. Probably the easiest way is dialing pound law. That's pound 529 from your cell phone. We are always open. Our call center is always waiting to take your call. 24-7, 365. Wow. Dan Morgan. From Morgan and Morgan, America's Large Injury Law, from, thanks for coming by the show. Thanks for having me. Visit furtherpeople.com for an office near you. Really get away from that. But that's really everything that I can think of. Was there anything
Starting point is 01:02:57 that we forgot? Was there anything that we forgot news-wise? We were going to talk about something else? I feel like we were going to talk about something else. Yeah, yeah, yeah. There's, um, I'm sure some people, I just thought this was kind of funny. It was, uh, I don't know if I'm pronouncing her name right, but Nico, lo, or Nick, what is it? Right, right, Nico Loll. Nicol, okay. Uh, so if, if you're not familiar with her name, she is the okay boomer girl.
Starting point is 01:03:23 You know, she blew up on Twitter where she's doing that little dance and she's wearing the Bernie Sanders shirt. and there was actually some pretty good post when that when the replies to that tweet was pretty great like there was actually some boomers on there that were saying some very interesting stuff and one of them I actually it was fantastic where the guy said why don't you call me what you really want to call me
Starting point is 01:03:47 and then he says the N word like hard R oh my God it was like where did this guy get this shit from it's a man you can find it I love people I love people trying to take that blight. You know what you want to call me. I'm just the precious to the group. Other group. You're calling me the N-word.
Starting point is 01:04:04 It's like, nah, bro. It's not that. You're old. You're just an old person. It was weird that he was there. Nobody said, like, no one said that at all. Wasn't it like a famous article? I think I did a video on this.
Starting point is 01:04:19 Of like, there was some guy who was like, boomer is the new N-WR. Yeah. Oh. that guy must have read that article because that's exactly what he was saying that's basically what he was saying he got charged bro
Starting point is 01:04:33 he read that and got charged up yeah anyway so she's uh so niccolo is known for being like you know pro she's progressive you know
Starting point is 01:04:48 in democratic socialism and stuff like that tax the rich you know she's a Bernie bro or whatever so she gained a huge audience of people that are like oh fuck yeah i'm down for that shit and then in one of the most tone deaf moves one of the most like worst read the room scenarios is she posts a video on youtube that is a tour of her two million dollar apartment and the ratio the like to this like ratio is just it's punishing and props to her for keeping the video up it's still up
Starting point is 01:05:26 and but it is punishing. There is no way. There's no way she thought this was going to happen. But she should have known this because of, and obviously it's not a huge deal. Like you get a lot of money. You want to buy nice things. I fucking get it.
Starting point is 01:05:42 But if you paint yourself as somebody who's the taxed the rich person, you'd want to do this stuff in your, in the privacy of, you know, just don't put it online. You wouldn't want to buy a $2 million. apartment and then give a tour of it having a fucking refrigerator that is specifically only for wine and having a closet that's pretty much as big as my fucking room you know what i mean like yeah that's the type of shit that people that are progressive it was don't want to fucking see it was definitely it was definitely like a tone deaf move i think at the same time
Starting point is 01:06:20 there is this weird kind of uh projected double standard that I'm seeing where it's like she she believes the rich should be taxed a lot and yet she's rich but it's like that's that's possible that's like that's not inherently hypocritical like you could be like a billionaire and be like yeah I think I don't pay enough
Starting point is 01:06:46 in taxes I think I should be taxed like way the fuck more yeah you know what I mean like you could make a ton of money and still believe those things in principle And like no one's no one who's actually like no serious person anyway and I'll say this because I'm like a super left leaning like Bernie dude right. I don't think anybody is really suggesting nobody's allowed to be rich, you know. It's just more of like there's a level of rich that becomes kind of inherently confusing and and debatably not all right. Like if you have like if you have like if you're making like six billion dollars a month, you're. You know, like at a certain point, it goes like, that's a bit, like, especially because you know that money's just sitting in the fucking Cayman Islands, not even fucking, you know what I mean?
Starting point is 01:07:33 Like that money is, that money is being quantified as American dollars, but it's not here and not being put back in it. Yeah. Of money, so it's fucking our country. That's the kind of shit. That's like problematic. Right, right, right, right. But that's what I'm saying. It's like, it's not necessarily hypocritical just because like, hey, here's my $2 million apartment.
Starting point is 01:07:51 Also, I believe that rich people should be taxed. It's not inherently counter. Those two statements. That's not counter. I don't think that's the only thing she doesn't. Right. Okay, go ahead. But at the same time, even somebody like me who is aware of that concept, I still wouldn't.
Starting point is 01:08:09 Lately, car buying has become a pretty dull experience. But on eBay, behind every car in part is a story waiting to be shared. There was a guy who bought a 2020 Porsche Cayman GT4 on eBay. It was well loved. There are plenty of Kamens in great condition on eBay. but this one needed some work. That's just the start of the story. So after this guy gets a great deal on his dream car,
Starting point is 01:08:32 he rebuilds the whole thing with all these parts he found on eBay. Performance brakes, suspension, body panels, the works, guaranteed to fit. Next thing you know, this nearly scrapped Cayman was out there on the track as a full-blown race car. You're ready to go, daily driver, your next Restamon. Hello, Lotus Alon, hand the parts to finish it. eBay has thousands of cars and is the largest online selection of vehicle parts and accessories. eBay, things people love. I've got Dan Morgan here on the pod. Say hi, Dan.
Starting point is 01:09:04 Hey, how's it going today? It's going good, man. Tell us who you are and what you do. I'm Dan Morgan. I'm an attorney and a managing partner at Morgan and Morgan, which is America's largest injury law firm. That's pretty awesome. I think I saw Billboard of years recently that said $20 billion. $1.20 billion is an insane number. Yeah, $20 billion recovered. It's actually, I think, somewhere north, probably closer to 22, 23 after this year. And each year we get bigger and badder and our army grows. So the number will hopefully keep getting bigger and bigger as time goes on. Awesome. So how does someone get in contact with Morgan and Morgan? What would I do if I got into an accident? Probably the easiest way is dialing pound law. That's pound 529 from your cell phone.
Starting point is 01:09:46 We are always open. Our call center is always waiting to take your call. 24-7, 365. Wow. Dan Morgan. From Morgan and Morgan, America's Large Injury Law, thanks for coming by the show. Thanks for having me. Visit for the people.com for an office near you. Post a fucking tour of my $2 million apartment. I wouldn't do that. Just based on the sheer, like, messaging, it's, you know what I mean? Like, it's obviously like a bad look.
Starting point is 01:10:13 Like, even if it's not, like, actually hypocritical. It's just, like, don't fucking... You expect this behavior from people who, like, you would presumably very vehemently disagree with, generally speaking. Right. For instance, we live in a nice apartment in our... our apartment and living a nice place. I'm gonna go ahead and beep that out. I don't know why you would say that.
Starting point is 01:10:32 You know, we don't live in like the best place. We live in a nice area, right? We don't do fucking house tours, you know, like that's not how you do that. Also, who the fuck gets a $2 million apartment? That's the first thing my brain went to. I was just like, I showed Chris and I was like, Chris, she got a $2 million apartment. Who the fuck would do that? And you were like, I don't know that's stupid because it's dumb.
Starting point is 01:10:53 That's property right there. So a million dollars you're buying some property. property appreciating wealth. That's, that's it. I'd buy a building for $2 million. It's a hard flex. It is a hard flex. It's just a flex and it's like that's stupid. It's one of those things where it would be less egregious if she didn't even put the number in there. If she just spent, hey, house apartment tour, people would be like, holy shit, she has a really nice apartment. That's way less agreed than saying this was $2 million, bitch. You'll never be able to get something like this. It's just one of those things. It's just that type of look.
Starting point is 01:11:26 When you express when you throw numbers into it. It's like, ooh, oof. Like, I would never do that. Yeah. Also, like, if I, I would never do that. If I got a lot of money, I would buy. I know people that comment on that video and make comments about the video, and then she blocked them. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:11:40 Oh, for real? Yeah, she unfollowed a lot of people. She follows me still. Jay Aubrey. We'll see. We'll see how long that lasts. Well, we hopefully, you know, she'd probably at least in the fuck of snark tank. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:11:53 I know. It's not like I dislike her. I just think it was a dumb, it was just a dumb idea. Yeah, you know. It's just stupid. Like if I was, if I was homes with her, I'd be like, hey, uh, why? It's a bad voice. I'd be like, hey, hey friend, why'd you do that? Uh, but honestly, like, I don't know, it probably is just like, it's like with anything on the internet. It's like, I'm going to do this. This isn't going to create some buzz. It might be negative, but it's buzz. Buzz is buzz. Like it's true. You know? I haven't thought about her since that OK boomer shit happen. So, because I don't, I'm being honest, I hate all that shit, that simpy TikTok shit. I really don't, I don't like it at all.
Starting point is 01:12:29 I don't like any of the, the exaggerated fucking, just not acting like a real person. The lip syncing and the dancing on TikTok. All that shit. And even like, I watched her video, even the tour of the apartment, the way that she acts, it just annoys me. Because it's so, it's so inauthentic. It's not like a whole real person would act. Like, that's not how she acts in real life, obviously. But she's not.
Starting point is 01:12:53 It's not like she's doing it to, for comedic. It's just like, it's like, you know, sometimes there's certain hosts. Even sometimes there would be like, a host for certain awards shows or gaming stuff. Like, where they just, they're way to, they're hamming it up. And I'm like, dude, just bring it down. Bring it down. Just be good. Comedic timing's great.
Starting point is 01:13:15 I understand that. If you're trying to ham it up for comedies, purposes. But if you're just trying to be up your personality, it just seems, I'm like, you just seem like the fakeest person on earth. And if you were like this around me, I would just walk away from me. I wouldn't even say like, I wouldn't even say anything mean to you, but I just would leave. Because I'd be like, you fuck this person. Let's just fake as bullshit. Be real. That's it. Like, it's just, and that's anybody. It's nothing against her. It's just all that TikTok shit. I just, uh, I'm covering the song from this, uh, what's her name?
Starting point is 01:13:46 Bella Porch She had She's a TikTok person That does all that shit I didn't even I didn't really know when I when I was shown I was just like Oh whatever I erased
Starting point is 01:14:01 Blocked it out of my head memory Then I heard this one song a couple of times Called build a bitch and I'm like I'm gonna cover that Because I'm trying to get some fucking clout And it turns out as the same person And I just they all seem the same to me They all act the same They do the TikTok dances
Starting point is 01:14:15 They do these exaggerated, like, you know, like their eyes and they're all, hmm. Yeah, yeah. And I'm like, fuck, this is for fucking, this is what you do to entertain three-year-olds. I'm not even fucking joking. That's how you act when the baby, you're like, ooh, hey, and you pouty and you, and then they're like, hey, this is so great. But they're doing it and like, simps are loving it. And I'm like, you're fucked, dude. It is very scary.
Starting point is 01:14:40 You have mommy issues. They want to be babies. Yeah. But there's the very premise of just lip syncing. Even this was a problem like five years ago when TikTok was musically and everybody hated it. And then they rebranded and suddenly everybody likes it again. Right. Like lip syncing is quite possibly the lowest form of entertainment that anybody could possibly indulgent.
Starting point is 01:15:12 I don't I sincerely do not understand how a human being I mean it I'm sorry if you're a friend of mine and you love that shit I would never tell you this to your face but I believe it
Starting point is 01:15:26 okay you know because I know everybody's had a hard year everybody's had a hard year I don't want to make anybody feel bad especially when they're in the room with me that's uncomfortable but real talk
Starting point is 01:15:37 actually finding that stuff engaging is fucking embarrassing it is it's like the fucking James Corden like oh carpal karaoke and they're just like sitting there lip singing it's like what is the what is the entertainment value in seeing like oh hey
Starting point is 01:15:54 here's a woman singing a rap song or like oh hey here's a fucking here's a portly fellow singing a woman's song but they're not really singing it's just they're making it seem like they are it's like I don't get it
Starting point is 01:16:09 that's stuff you do in like the shower Like, would you watch some fucking James Corden washing his nutsack on fucking cable television? Would that be interesting? Like, I... Some people would. Some people would because they're fucking broken. Some people are fucking damaged. It's a bad example.
Starting point is 01:16:26 There are plenty of perverts who would absolutely watch that. Yeah, if he had nudity in there, come on. Yeah, everyone. I'll check that out. You know, I got to see what that's all about. But I just, I don't know, I just, there's no... I don't want to say there's no talent in there. there because there are definitely people who like like I think of like drunk history or something where
Starting point is 01:16:47 it's like that's kind of lip sync base but it's also like there's more to it than that it's like it's a whole fucking production that they got going on at drunk history so like yeah I understand the value in somebody being kind of good at that but it's not good enough to just by itself like support like the entertainment value of an entire program it's just not I fucking I hate this shit and dancing is also just I don't know when I don't know when we collectively as a culture decided that dancing was a punchline. Like, I don't know when that happened. Like, it must have been, I definitely, obviously,
Starting point is 01:17:20 post 9-11, but exactly when, I don't know, exactly what year did it become like, oh, look, he, like, dances well, and that's funny. When did that happen? I don't know. I don't even, I don't acknowledge it. I don't even know. You don't know, you've never seen, like, viral.
Starting point is 01:17:42 dances and that's all the content is and it's just like oh isn't this funny and I'm like bro what? Yeah, I love I love dance. It's nothing to me when I see when I see somebody do something like that like it was supposed to be like exactly what you're talking about like almost like a TikTok pretty much where there's people doing dances and it's like they're doing it to songs and they're sinking it and shit and I'm like I I don't even register it at his thing I'm to the next thing.
Starting point is 01:18:10 Yeah. It's not even enough for me to elicit a response. I'm like, this is so stupid. I'm just like, my brain doesn't understand it. It's not even content. It's disrespectful. It's like dancing is so fucking such an art form. And people do shit like that.
Starting point is 01:18:25 I'm just, you're less. You're less than what you're supposed to be. You're a failure. Yeah. You're failing. Yeah, dude. I actually, for a while when there was like a bunch of dance shows, they were like, I was like really impressed with some of the.
Starting point is 01:18:40 people that I was like, holy shit, it's crazy what the human body can do. It's some, some, uh, remember those fucking weirdos, the Jabberwockys? Remember those guys? They wear masks and shit. Yeah. Like that shit was like, okay. Yeah, that, like, when I see that shit, I'm like, that's what I see like, what dancing is. I'm like, oh, wow, these people are fucking incredible.
Starting point is 01:19:00 Like, this would take, I don't have enough patience to ever do this, ever. I would never do this. And so, but yeah, as far as any, seeing like some fucking. I don't know, some white chick with no ass, like fucking shaking nothing. And to some, I'm like, what's happening? I don't know what's happening. I have never seen. I have never seen dance.
Starting point is 01:19:24 I have never seen a dance that I was thoroughly or even remotely impressed by. I don't think I've ever appreciated even a modicum of dance at all. Like I just, I really don't. Like, I remember, like, I remember seeing videos of like Michael Jackson. People like, isn't this crazy? I was like, no. it's the person moving around like I don't do so like I just don't like
Starting point is 01:19:44 I don't get it person moving around that's like this is not the equipment of doing that yeah I'm not even I'm not even exaggerate listen I'm not exaggerating for the purpose of the podcast
Starting point is 01:20:00 I really mean this I just don't see that's so wild I don't see it's I feel like that's that's I feel like that can't be true only because of there's certain things
Starting point is 01:20:12 like seeing a fucking human do like multiple black backflips like say gymnastics which is like almost like a form of dancing essentially where you're like and you can't be like wow that's really impressive because I could never do that a million years well you grew up in New York City bro you go to Manhattan all the time and there are so many
Starting point is 01:20:30 unbelievable street performers in Manhattan that you're just going to see eventually and you're never like oh that's pretty impressive. I mean, I've seen it my whole life. It's just like, it's just like, okay, yeah. But you're still not like that's impressive nonetheless. I've seen hundreds of people move like really impressively.
Starting point is 01:20:47 So it's like, to me, it's just always like, oh, uh, anybody could do that if they just tried to do it, you know, if they really dedicated themselves to doing it. Obviously you have to have the right, like, obviously you can't. Obviously, young Crip isn't going to go breakdancing. But like, you know, like, you know, like, he might. He might break dance. I mean, we'll see Maybe Ricky Burwick could
Starting point is 01:21:10 Could break dance But I don't know, like Oh my God I just Well, then what's impressive to you, Chris? I mean, gymnastics is impressive Because that's like, you know, that's But it's this, your body's moving in a way
Starting point is 01:21:23 That is fucking really impressive It's the same concept No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, it's far different Because I know No, no, no, no, you know how I know Here's you know how I know Because I took, what is it? I have seen, there's no risk in dance, really.
Starting point is 01:21:42 You just, the biggest risk you got is that you look kind of dumb if you do it wrong. Gymnastics, I've seen people, I've seen people look like dogs afterwards. They've got their knees bending backwards. They're suddenly, they're arbiters after a while. And it's like, okay, that's a big deal. Not in the same fucking way that like a gymnast is. dancing too, but you can definitely hear yourself of a dancing. Yeah, yeah, you get a paper cut opening a Pop-Tart.
Starting point is 01:22:07 Dude, fucking, go talk to ballet dancers. Dude, ballet dancers would heavily disagree with you. Oh, that's a whole, that's a whole barbaric practice. Literally one of the most fucking dancing. One of the most rudimentary things ever. It's dancing. That's classical dancing, actually, because most dancers learn ballet first, actually. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:22:26 I don't know. I just, I don't find it all that. Like those, those dance, they don't. Mucho. I don't know. Like, to me, it's just like, I've seen a lot of dance. I've watched those dance shows, and I just, it's just like, I don't know. It's, they rehearse this.
Starting point is 01:22:44 It's cool. Like, I get it. But at no point is anybody, like, to me, like, flipping a million times around a pole and, like, flipping up in the air and landing directly, like, completely straight, that is infinitely more impressive than, like, somebody, like, moonwalking. Like it's just I don't think they're even close to the same amount of like physical strength. You're fucking talking about like one of the most difficult things to do at the highest level versus a basic dance move. You're not even putting them on the same thing about dance move like say get to the ballet which is one of the hardest things like the the flea, whatever the I don't know any of those fucking I don't know what that's called.
Starting point is 01:23:24 But the shit that they do and when they're fucking like flying in there or like say all that crazy shit or say like a B-boy spinning on his. fucking head for like a minute. You know what I mean? Like when you get to the highest levels of dance, and I feel like you need to, you need to put them against, like you're fucking putting like the fly weights versus the heavy weights, man.
Starting point is 01:23:44 Like it doesn't work. It doesn't fucking work like that. I think you would be very impressed with dance at the highest levels, but I guess for like the moonwalk, you're like, oh, he's pretending to walk backwards. I can understand how some people would be like, I can do that if I put my mind to it.
Starting point is 01:23:59 But try spinning on your head, right? and do a shuffle to a fucking windmill and spin on your head and tell me like oh I can do that if I fucking like come on dude like that shit's up of a one arm afterwards it's like what the hell it just jack off like pull your pants down
Starting point is 01:24:16 and jack off hard to you too it's I don't know to me to me it just seems like of the things you could do in a physical way of expression that seems to be like the most pick upable thing Like I really do think anybody could learn how to dance
Starting point is 01:24:33 Whereas like I feel like things like Even things like skating to me Like I part of me can't even conceptualize how people are able to like Fuck it like even just the basic premise of like Oh they're in the air and the board remains stuck to their feet Even though they're in the middle of the air and like It's not actually stuck to it's like what the fuck is that That is like wizardry to me I don't understand how that shit works
Starting point is 01:24:56 But like a dance move regardless of the level of complexity I just know that a person can do that if they just wanted to do it. You just have like a weird cognitive dissonance about dancing. I mean probably. I mean, I would imagine. Like dancing and gymnastics eventually like at the higher, like once you get into like B-boy dancing and like freestyle and a hip-hop dancing, it becomes pretty gymnastic by nature. Lately, car buying has become a pretty dull experience.
Starting point is 01:25:25 But on eBay, behind every car in part is a story waiting to be shared. There was a guy who bought a 2020 Porsche Cayman GT4 on eBay. It was well loved. There are plenty of Caymans in great condition on eBay, but this one needed some work. That's just the start of the story. So after this guy gets a great deal on his dream car, he rebuilds the whole thing with all these parts he found on eBay.
Starting point is 01:25:48 Performance brakes, suspension, body panels, the works, guaranteed to fit. Next thing you know, this nearly scrapped Cayman was out there on the track as a full-blown race car. You're ready to go daily driver, your next Restamod. Hello, Lotus Alon, hand the parts to finish it. eBay has thousands of cars and is the largest online selection of vehicle parts and accessories. eBay. Things people love. I've got Dan Morgan here on the pod. Say hi, Dan. Hey, how's it going today?
Starting point is 01:26:17 It's going good, man. Tell us who you are and what you do. I'm Dan Morgan. I'm an attorney and a managing partner at Morgan and Morgan, which is America's largest injury law firm. That's pretty awesome. I think I saw billboard of years recently that said 20 billion one. 20 million is an insane number. Yeah, 20 billion recovered. It's actually, I think, somewhere north, probably closer to 22, 23 after this year. And each year we get bigger and badder and our army grows.
Starting point is 01:26:44 So the number will hopefully keep getting bigger and bigger as time goes on. Awesome. So how does someone get in contact with Morgan and Morgan? What would I do if I got into an accident? Probably the easiest way is dialing pound law. That's pound 529 from your cell phone. We are always open. Our call center is always waiting to take your call.
Starting point is 01:27:01 24-7, 365. Wow. Dan Morgan. From Morgan and Morgan, America's Large Injury Lawfram, thanks for coming by the show. Thanks for having me. Visit for the people.com for an office near you. I don't know. But it's just gymnastics with, like, you have to have rhythm also to be able to do it.
Starting point is 01:27:17 I've just, I've just seen too much. Even, even, like, even this, you know, boxers and, like, a lot of professional athletes. I just, I don't see. Like, I can't do that. it, but like, I don't know. Once you've seen a plane flying to the Twin Towers, suddenly everything's less impressive. Oh, my God.
Starting point is 01:27:37 Hark gets back to 9-11 again, everything. Let's move. Let's move. And 9-11, Chris became self-aware and everything changed. He realized he was a human boy in a feeding mortal shell. Hey, man, you grow up pretty fast. All right, let's move on to some questions by our beautiful friends over at patreon.com slash the snark tank.
Starting point is 01:27:59 We got a lot of, uh, we got some first timers here today too. But, uh, we'll get to that when we, uh, when we get to it. Connor King wrote and he says, Chris Sween and Arbiter of all opinions. Chris, you often sing the praises of grappling hooks, but I never hear you discuss my very first grappling hook video game experience, Lost Planet. Have any of you three had the opportunity to play this game? If not, I thought you ought to give it a shot. If so, why, why did it say?
Starting point is 01:28:27 like nobody talk about it. I mean, it's an old game, Connor. Like, it's not like... It was one of the first Xbox games. It was one of the first 360 games. Yeah, that was the first proper 360 game that I played online.
Starting point is 01:28:41 I remember that because, like, Halo 3 wasn't out yet and they had a multiplayer demo that you could download on 360 and you could just, like, play online for free. And that did have grappling hooks, you're right. It was fucking awesome. I remember I thought the snow in that game
Starting point is 01:28:55 looked fucking incredible also. But it probably doesn't look all that impressive now. Not anymore. Yeah, definitely not. But I don't know. I liked Lost Planet. It didn't set the world on fire or anything. Like, I don't know if I'm nostalgic enough about it to, like, if they put it out again,
Starting point is 01:29:10 I don't know if I would be like, oh, yeah, I got to jump into, you know, I really got to relive those Lost Planet glory days. Like, I don't know if it's that kind of a video game. But I have fond associations with it more than. more than I remember it as like a game that I loved, you know? It's just kind of one of those middle market kind of, not too shabby kind of deals. That was a Capcom game, right? Yeah.
Starting point is 01:29:40 Is that Capcom? I think it was. Yeah. Yeah, it was. Let me look this up. Yeah, it definitely was. That sounds right. It definitely was.
Starting point is 01:29:49 I think it was Capcom. Yeah, yeah, Capcom. Valve. It looked like a Valve game. Kenji Inafune. Yeah, it's a fuck. that's crazy but yeah lost plan it was cool
Starting point is 01:30:02 I like the second one actually a lot I never played the third one I never played the third one I just saw the third one glitches there's like there's a really good glitch or there's like a sequence where everyone's like shooting each other with lasers and shit but like the main guy only
Starting point is 01:30:16 his his top torso was gone so his legs doing the entire sequence it's fucking great it's probably pretty easy to find it's one of the most egregious fucking glitches of last planet three or it's really good it's really good
Starting point is 01:30:31 yeah that was I don't even know there was a third one I don't know there was a second one that series is like synonymous to me with like that period of time where there was just like a new video game like all the time about like even Sony was like putting out
Starting point is 01:30:43 just random shit like it was like here's Hayes here's PlayStation All Stars Battle Royale here's fucking uh mod nation racers and it was just like what the fuck is what is what is all this why are you making so much fucking weird nonsense
Starting point is 01:30:58 But yeah, damn, Modnation, I remember that. That's crazy. Yeah, I think that became something else. But I think a little big planet carding or something. There was like some cart racer for a little big planet that didn't do too well. But yeah, no, we've, I think I've talked about Lost Planet before. Probably not on the Star Tank, though. So fair enough.
Starting point is 01:31:20 Jacques 552 goes, he writes and he says, Hi there. you humorous bags of meat out of all the fictional characters you can think of which ones have the greatest drip. Stay safe and stay sane fellas The greatest drip.
Starting point is 01:31:39 Yeah I love that question Out of the fictional characters. There's definitely Master Chiefs up there. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. I have a fucking Luli. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Dude, he has fucking armor on. He looks insanely awesome.
Starting point is 01:31:52 Get the fucking awesome. We're talking about drift, drip in the fucking world as we live in, dude. You know exactly what drip is. Yeah, I'm thinking like Dante. Virgil from my, Virgil. Yeah, I was thinking Virgil. Virgil from, uh, from, uh, what?
Starting point is 01:32:09 Bro. Dude, Virgil is fucking, like, is like Lord Byron shit, dude. That's not drip. You're not fucking, you don't, you know what drip is, bitch is, bitch. Virgil from Denver May Cry 5. Virgil from Denver May Cry looks flying in a bitch, bro. He's fucking, that's not, dude. That's like, that's like saying Prince fucking Charles or whatever, it has drip.
Starting point is 01:32:27 that's what that's that's that's not fucking drip Virgil looks sick Virgil dresses like he's fucking royalty That's not drip dude Bro Virgil looks sick as Now he's dressed like a full metal alchemist Like one of those officers
Starting point is 01:32:40 Like that's not He looks drip Woo on a bitch Dantay looks way cooler Dante is definitely more on the drip level Right I don't I don't think He's got a lot of swagger
Starting point is 01:32:52 Come on man I think they're both people I wouldn't get one of the other No man he's got that red He's got that red jacket, like the, like the casual, like a half button down. Virgil. Virgil has that blue fucking open coat with the fucking katana with the golden red. The katana is so anti-drip too, man.
Starting point is 01:33:10 That's so like fucking traditional and discipline. Dude, no. If any, go ask any, okay, if go ask any hood nigger, all right? Okay, here we go. If they had her choice to wield a sword, do you think any of them would be, oh, I want the katana dog? No, they'd want some fucking big-ass fucking. You know what is what is what? They would take Katana because web culture and black culture are so synonymous
Starting point is 01:33:36 each other now that I know people would say Katana. I, 100% of me like a berserk. They'd want a berserk fucking or a cloud strife shit, dude. They wouldn't want that little bitch-ass fucking. They wouldn't know that you would want a Katana because you're like, oh, we watch Demon Slayer. They're like, oh, we watch demons slayer. They don't watch.
Starting point is 01:33:54 They don't watch. They don't watch demons slayer. They do, bro. 12-year-old white girls and you watch Demon Slayer. Derek. That's it. Derek. That's it.
Starting point is 01:34:02 That's it. That's the Democratic. I have, Derek, Derek, Derek, I have a young nephew who is a nigger. He is a New York City. And I'm embarrassed. I'm embarrassed for you. Tim wearing nigger. He wears Timsy plays basketball.
Starting point is 01:34:15 He shoots dice. He is a nigger. And all his homies, all his homies, all his homies and everybody in the school went to see the demon slayer movie, bro. Wait, wait, wait, wait. I'm not even lying. Our kids actually still shooting dice. Are they doing some C-lower and shit? No.
Starting point is 01:34:31 That's the hood. That's the hood, bro. That's just the nature of the hood. I thought that shit was over, dude. Nah. I don't think, bro. You think it's over. I don't think dice.
Starting point is 01:34:40 Oh, my God. Hold on. Hold on. Hold on. I will say, I believe Sweeney about the dice. Because a friend of ours lives in an area that is not ideal. And I have walked through there many. a time and people are out on the street. I don't know if it's
Starting point is 01:34:57 dice, but I've seen people not not, it wouldn't be absurd to assume they're around my age playing jacks in the street. Damn, they're going backwards, man. Yeah, it's fucking crazy. I remember I saw that
Starting point is 01:35:13 it was, it was like seeing a fucking pterodactal, like just roaming this, it was like how the fuck is that still around? But yeah, that is, that is real. I wouldn't, I wouldn't be surprised to see dice. We grew out of it. We evolved past it. We got older. We were like, all right, cool. We also left no more. Very true. We also left the hoods. We're all like, we don't do dice no one.
Starting point is 01:35:36 That's some old shit. I don't got money to throw away like that. But they still do shit like that. Closest I have is I got I got dominoes. I haven't played him yet. Damn, that's some hood shit. I haven't played. I haven't played with him yet. That's some Puerto Rican people's shit, bro. I learned how to play dominoes. One, I learned how to play spades and dominoes in the same night. I never learned that. You know how to play spades? Nah, I never learned it. You don't play Remy? What was the, I, I'm aware, but I don't really, you know what I mean?
Starting point is 01:36:06 I stay away from a lot of gambling. The only gambling that we did is kids and our school tried to ban it. I don't even remember if I had a name, but you would, you would crease the opposite corners of your dollars, and then you would flip them. And so basically, and you would call the side you want, the hedge or tails, and whoever got it. you keep the, you keep, we would basically, it was basically like playing, uh, what, like war, I declare war, whatever. Yeah, yeah,
Starting point is 01:36:32 has the biggest number takes the pile. We, yeah, we were all gambling and then they, they started banning that shit because I guess it was, we're going to be morally corrupt. I was like, dude, shut the fuck up. Kids want to make a couple extra dollars. They stopped playing dodgeball in my fucking school because we were,
Starting point is 01:36:50 we were gambling on the games. Really? That's why they stopped for you guys? Well, that's, that's, that's the assumption. because like until we were like we we were doing it regularly and we got like really comfortable with it and then we started not hiding it and then suspiciously it stopped being played but uh stopped them i said somebody got people got hurt people got hurt often in dodgeball can i say something regular what's uh i have never seen a single person get hurt in dodgeball like actually for real i've seen people get hurt very often i've seen i've seen a um a not a full blown broken nose but like a bloody nose i've seen that shit yeah yeah like somebody just throwing the fucking really hard at somebody's face. I've seen that a lot.
Starting point is 01:37:28 It's fucking weird to me that they were just like, hey, because when I was a kid, they were like, dodgeball's so violent. We can't let that happen. Meanwhile, we got like a football team and kids are like fucking concussing
Starting point is 01:37:37 their brains. I always hated that fucking bullshit. It was because for our school, we would always gang up on the more portly kids. Because like, you pick your teams. Well, here's,
Starting point is 01:37:48 well, hold on. Let me, the real reason why they got rid of Dodgeball is because there's no professional dodgeball where you could make money. Really what it was, it was just like,
Starting point is 01:37:55 hey, football is way more dangerous, but there's a path to success with football, whereas like if you're just getting hurt slightly a little bit every day from dodgeball, it's not going to help you all that much. So we're just going to stop doing dodgeball. I mean, the thing is that we didn't play in high school, like in gym time, you weren't playing proper football. No, you weren't playing like straight up regular football. But there's a team is what I'm saying.
Starting point is 01:38:20 There's a team. But for us it would be like, you'd pick the teams. It'd be two people, right? you picked the teams it'd be okay every kid that plays a sport would be on the team right so it'd be oh kingston you play basketball you're on my team i was always like one of the top four picks every time in dodgeball was never like one of the later picks i was good at the game and i knew how to play and then it'd be like a girl and like a chunky kid last and somebody would always pick the girl you'd be like yeah the girl got picked and it'd be that big kid that would be bombarded in the
Starting point is 01:38:48 beginning like we'd like all right go we'd all run for the balls the team with the most athletes usually gets most of the balls, and it'd be that one kid that just gets hit with three balls immediately. And you're like, dang, this is not cool. He's fishing a barrel. He's fishing a fucking barrel, man. Like, he can't move. I'm throwing dynamite in that barrel, bro. Like, I'm trying to kill him. Yo, I was always perplexed by some of the, because there was the complete contrast.
Starting point is 01:39:11 There was all these big dudes. Some of them had muscle, so they were fastest shit. Lately, car buying has become a pretty dull experience. But on eBay, behind every car in part, is a lot of, a story waiting to be shared. There was a guy who bought a 2020 Porsche Cayman GT4 on eBay. It was well loved. There are plenty of Cayman's in great condition on eBay, but this one needed some work. That's just the start of the story. So after this guy gets a great deal on his dream car, he rebuilds the whole thing with all these parts he found on eBay. Performance brakes,
Starting point is 01:39:44 suspension, body panels, the works, guaranteed to fit. Next thing you know, this nearly scrapped Kaman was out there on the track as a full-blown race car. You're ready to go daily driver. Your next Restamod. Hello, Lodda Salon, hand the parts to finish it. eBay has thousands of cars and is the largest online selection of vehicle parts and accessories. eBay. Things people love. I've got Dan Morgan here on the pod.
Starting point is 01:40:11 Say hi, Dan. Hey, how's it going today? It's going good, man. Tell us who you are and what you do. I'm Dan Morgan. I'm an attorney and a managing partner at Morgan and Morgan, which is America's largest injury law firm. That's pretty awesome. I think I saw billboarded years recently that said 20 billion one. 20 million is an insane number. Yeah, 20 billion recovered. It's actually, I think somewhere north,
Starting point is 01:40:34 probably closer to 22, 23 after this year. And each year we get bigger and badder and our army grows. So the number will hopefully keep getting bigger and bigger as time goes on. Awesome. So how does someone get in contact with Morgan and Morgan? What would I do if I got into an accident? Probably the easiest way is dialing pound law. That's pound 529 from your cell phone. We are always open. Our call center is always waiting to take your call. 24-7, 365. Wow. Dan Morgan. From Morgan and Morgan, America's Large Injury Law, from, thanks for coming by the show. Thanks for having me. Visit furtherpeople.com for an office near you. Because their muscles can carry their weight. And then there was the doughy motherfuckers that were slow, like, they were so slow. I didn't
Starting point is 01:41:16 understand how is your body, like, it's not possible for you to, you must be. You must be. be able to move faster. Like humanly, you must be able to like get up to at least five miles an hour. What are you doing? It didn't, like, it would get me mad because I feel like you're not trying to move because you must be able to move quicker. Like it was the weirdest shit. And then we had some of those motherfuckers on our football team that weren't even benching 100 pounds. And we were like 16, 17. And I'm like, dude, this is, that doesn't make sense. Like your body's carrying like all 300 pounds of you, you should be able to at least lift 100 pounds. What happens?
Starting point is 01:41:52 You unlock that, though. You unlock that. Because what happens is when you play sports, stuff like that, you eventually, like, how'd I explain it? Like, right now, I can't spring the way I used to when I was younger. But when I was, eventually you learn, like, how to actually jump or how to properly propel yourself and run or, like, because a lot of people I knew they couldn't, they couldn't run and look behind them and catch a football.
Starting point is 01:42:13 Like, people couldn't do that. Some people just couldn't do that around me. And eventually, you pick that up as you, like, you keep running around and you stay active, you learn how to you, like, really use your body to do something. Yeah, yeah. It's like the big doughy people in Dodge Bowl, where they were just like,
Starting point is 01:42:26 they wouldn't dodge, but they'd be like fucking ace at catching, because they had to. They could, yeah, they just double fist them, and I'm like, yo, I can't do that. I could never catch him. Like, if I was gonna,
Starting point is 01:42:38 if a ball was coming at me, I was done. If, if I couldn't move. Like it was, but I was fucking slippery, dude, and I was small. I was always the last person, but because I couldn't,
Starting point is 01:42:48 I also couldn't throw very hard, so I was always like I would just outlast everybody until they got tired. Fatigue. I just feel like there was like an explosiveness that was missing. That like that like I and I and I theorize why like say a lot of black folks develop the explosive is early is to evade getting your ass beat by your parents. Hispanic people too. I specifically Hispanic people. Yeah, brown people in general. There was I specifically and I might have even told this story before where I don't.
Starting point is 01:43:18 remember what I did, but I climbed up on my bunk bed and my mom was waiting for me to get down. She was just going to whip my ass. And then so I was like, I'm not coming down, obviously. And she wasn't going to come up there. So eventually she went away. But I knew she was waiting for me. She wasn't, she didn't completely retreat. And I was like, I got one shot. And I fucking jumped down and ran as fast as I could. Open the door. She was right behind me. Almost got me. And then I went out the back and I fucking didn't come back a few hours later. And I'm like, that's the type of shit that got me really good. at like jukeing and just my agility where it's like I have to go or I'm
Starting point is 01:43:52 her fucking leather belt she was ruthless man she was ruthless she would beat you till she broke the skin and then she would fucking place some Jedi mind tricks to be like you know I love you yeah like that type of bullshit and I'm like this is so fucked up
Starting point is 01:44:07 it's so mean my agility is garbage now it used to be so high I used to be able to fucking I used to be able to juke and like I used to be able to jump so high and now it's gone just gone
Starting point is 01:44:19 you don't use it if we use it it it would be different if we use it it'd be different because like we're not even out of our primes yet we're like not even past like 35 like I'm 27 I'm just being near my physical prime like in strength wise yeah and I'm just fat now like I don't do shit
Starting point is 01:44:35 like I go to the gym again and like every time I go to gym I feel like I'm gonna die afterwards opposed to when I was younger I could go play basketball for like six hours and come back home and still be awake until like 12 playing video games now if I go to basketball for like 30 I'm going to come back home and die. You're in, you should.
Starting point is 01:44:52 Well, I don't know. You just got to build that stamina again. Yeah, you just got to do it again. But I think we've reached a reasonable conclusion here that Virgil does not have drip. Oh, my God, that's where we started. Virgil does. Yes, he does. Eddie Gordo.
Starting point is 01:45:11 Eddie Gordo. That's my pick. Does Bayonetta have drip? Would you describe bayonetta is like being? She's like Virgil though. That's a complicated one. well because she's got hair I think her clothes
Starting point is 01:45:21 are pretty fucking dope though I think I think like they're not like she doesn't look like some fucking she's going to a ball you know what I mean that's her does sort of though that's what I'm
Starting point is 01:45:32 who else has drip who else looks badass I think Geryl who is Friesing Who Geryl yeah I mean
Starting point is 01:45:43 if he was if Geryl was born in today, I agree. He would have like, he would have like the best shoes and the best watches and shit. And I agree. I agree with that. He would have like, he'd be pretty well dressed. What about, uh, this is kind of cheating.
Starting point is 01:46:04 Because you can choose to dress him however you want. But Agent 47. From him in? Yeah, sometimes he's got that like red tucks or whatever that's like fucking obnoxious. I mean, he looks pretty, he looks, hmm, that's, that's actually because I don't, I think he's, to be honest,
Starting point is 01:46:26 I think because of his background and how he grew up, I think he, he would, people would think he's like, on the spectrum, to be honest. Oh my God. Because he's so, like, he's, he grew up so fucked up and so isolated, people would just assume.
Starting point is 01:46:43 Like, I don't think like he has the capability. You're probably right. good at blending in like a sociopath because his job. But like, I don't think he just on a normal day if we're hanging out with Agent 47, it would be the most awkward shit ever. You're probably, that's probably an accurate statement.
Starting point is 01:47:00 He's probably on the spectrum. But I mean, come on. How can you have no chance if you grew up with some assassination? Like, it's like fucking Master Chief. Like, the way he grew up.
Starting point is 01:47:13 Yeah. You don't have a chance. You don't have a chance to be like, He's not a social person. Yeah. Oh, oh my God, Donkey Kong. Let's move on. DK, he got the fucking tie on, bro.
Starting point is 01:47:28 He's got a tie on that says DK, bro. That's kind of fire. Funky Kong, if we're going to go there. Funky Kong's the one that's got drip. Thank you. Funky got drip. Funky got drip. You right.
Starting point is 01:47:41 You right about that. Let's move on. God help us. Hey, go wrote in. He says, Hey, guys, long-time listener and supporter, and loving the show so far. I like how he says so far is if there's like a narrative here that it's going to like eventually get better. Just for just a random general question for you all out there, what are your thoughts on cryptocurrencies?
Starting point is 01:48:04 Elon has been hyping them up recently and I just wanted to, wanted your guys take on it. Again, happy you're all keeping the show going despite knowing I'm trying to keep my sanity intact with all this shit that's going on. peace. So that was Haco. Honestly, I don't know shit about cryptocurrencies. I just invest in the ones that like my friends who are too, who are super nerdy about it, tell me. And they're usually pretty on point, you know. I, I, I live and die by their advice. But I have no idea what a Bitcoin is.
Starting point is 01:48:33 I don't understand how. Like, I know it needs a lot of computers and I know it's apparently environmentally unfriendly. And I know like, you know, it's a bunch of like ones and zeros that get kept in a blockchain and a blockchain is something that I'm only vaguely familiar with as a concept. You know enough. You know enough. Enough to understand the terminology, but not enough to understand how any of it really relates or like where it's going.
Starting point is 01:49:01 Yeah, it's kind of like knowing like, yeah, I know that jerky is dehydrated meat, but I wouldn't even know like how do you even do. How do you do that? You know, like, I don't know how to dehydrate a meat. You know, I don't know the first thing about that. So to me, it's just this alien thing that I occasionally dabble in when I feel confident. That doge coin shit was hilarious. I, because I fucking, I knew it.
Starting point is 01:49:29 I knew like he was going to be on Saturday Night Live, and I'm like, oh, he, every time Elon Musk does something publicly, his stocks and anything that he's attracted, anything that he's remotely attached to, fucking plummets. So I was like, all right, I'm going to wait the last possible second before Saturday Night Live starts and I'm going to sell my doge.
Starting point is 01:49:53 I was like the exact right time to do it. I was fucking laughing my ass off. But, uh, I don't really know what the fuck I'm doing, though, at the same time. You don't really need to. That's the whole, that's the beauty of stocks. Like, since cryptocurrency is being traded
Starting point is 01:50:09 and it is you know it's that's that's really all you need to know it's people that are usually a lot smarter than you give you good advice and then just you know the basic thing don't fucking don't invest what you uh which well what is the what's the quote basically don't invest what you wouldn't be comfortable losing thank you yeah so that's it's as simple as that where i'm like oh i'm gonna just throw a little bit into this doge and i'll make a little bit of money and that's all i've been doing i you know made a like a little bit of change with a bitcoin something like that. Just making a little bit, I've never thrown in enough to where I would have been mad either way if I'm like, oh, because it's whatever. But yeah, but it's been all it's been all pluses. Because I'm not throwing in that much money. So it's pretty easy to just see
Starting point is 01:50:57 little trends. You see something's happening like, oh, let me just get this real quick. And that's what a lot of these fucking, yeah, you just got to be a little diligent and, you know, the more volatility, you just got to be like, okay, I'm going to have to just hopefully I can buy a dip, and then I can sell you. Like, it's just like, just pay attention a little bit. But as far as it, like, say, cryptocurrency being like the currency of the future, I don't know what, because like at a certain point, like, I don't know what governments are going to do.
Starting point is 01:51:30 Yeah. And what, so. It's not going to last. I don't think it's going to last, like, particularly long. I think it'll last a while. That's potential. That's potential. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:51:38 Yeah, no, I do think it's going to last a while Only because I feel like, dude, the government barely understands like the internet And that's been around for like Fucking how long has it been Cryptocurrencies are like fairly new It's been like within the last like I think 10 years really They've really started to become a thing Which means government is probably going to be even further behind on that
Starting point is 01:51:59 And they already are on the very fucking mechanism That allows it to function in the first place But because there's so much money there I feel like they have more of an incentive to kind of like figure that shit out before anything else Like a government official doesn't really have There's no benefit really for them to understand TikTok In any real way other than like
Starting point is 01:52:19 Understanding kids I guess But you know If you're a corrupt politician you should definitely know about Ways that people are going to make money That are completely untraceable So we'll see I would give it maybe the next sometime in the next 10 years to the later half,
Starting point is 01:52:38 I would imagine you're going to see some serious regulation on that shit. But I think it's interesting. I just, you know, I wouldn't call myself like an enthusiast of it or somebody who's particularly knowledgeable on it, though. What is this? What is this? What is this? Dank magician of chaos, road. And he says, hello, moral compass, immoral compass, and chaos incarnate. Second time asking this one, well, it's the first time on the show, then.
Starting point is 01:53:05 my first daughter is expected in two months. Whoa. Hey, oh. Yeah, man, congrats. And I figured who better to give life advice than the man I'd be worried if I myself was left in charge of. So my question is, what advice do you wish someone gave your parents before raising you? Ooh, that's real specific. Oh, shit.
Starting point is 01:53:29 What advice. Use your words instead of your hands sometimes, you know? Just like, yeah. Use your words. Sometimes, like words work. Like words work too. A kid can be reasoned with. That's a good one.
Starting point is 01:53:42 Yeah. Like, you got to, you got to understand that like, it's, it's a, it's a generational thing, you know. Like, our parents got the rod. So they thought, well, when I did this to discipline me, my parents used to, used to give me, you know, give me a beating. And it would work. What happens is that instills bad habits in the family and it goes down. It just goes down the chain. And you can, you can notice it.
Starting point is 01:54:05 You notice it in people's families that like, oh, this guy that's really violent is always threatening to fuck somebody up. I wonder if his dad's similar to that. And you can find out his dad or his mom or something like that. But sometimes all you got to do is understand that like just we may not be as smart as you as kids, but we can still very easily be spoken to. We can understand things. Yeah. Like I like here's a good example. My neighbors that moved in recently, like maybe six months ago, uh, white is shit.
Starting point is 01:54:34 It's weird that there's like a bunch of white people moving in the hood right now. So I keep seeing them. I'm like, oh, shit, it's happening. But anyway, they're very chill. And the dad, like, the kid was in the car. I get in my windows open, I can hear him. And he's like, Colton or whatever, like, you, I need you to get out of the car. You know, I'm going to count to three.
Starting point is 01:54:55 And then he's like, one, two, he's like, you want me to count to three? You want me to hit three? Like, you're going to be on timeout. And then the kid gets out of the car. And I was like, what? the fuck instead of just getting smacked in the fucking face get out of the fucking car you know what I'm saying it was like yeah yeah that's that's wild I'm like that that can be done you know what I mean
Starting point is 01:55:15 yeah that's like a magic trick but uh yeah I don't know I think I would say uh aside from like obvious things like hey invest in Apple um I would say like you know probably like college will not be as important in a couple decades as it currently is. And maybe it's not even that before. I know. But like what I'm saying. I think condense that to fuck college, homie. Well, what I'm saying is like, I think kids can be a lot wiser than people give them credit for.
Starting point is 01:56:00 because, like, I remember, like, people, like, or kids when I was younger who, like, wanted to do things, like, very specific things, like, hey, I want to go down this creative path. I want to go down this creative path and then, like, their parents would be like, there's no future in that. Lately, car buying has become a pretty dull experience. But on eBay, behind every car in part is a story waiting to be shared. There was a guy who bought a 2020 Porsche Cayman GT4 on eBay. It was well loved. There are plenty of Kamens in great condition on eBay, but this one needed some work.
Starting point is 01:56:36 That's just the start of the story. So after this guy gets a great deal on his dream car, he rebuilds the whole thing with all these parts he found on eBay. Performance brakes, suspension, body panels, the works, guaranteed to fit. Next thing you know, this nearly scrapped Kamen was out there on the track as a full-blown race car. You're ready to go daily driver, your next Restamod. Hello, Lotus Alon. and the parts to finish it. eBay has thousands of cars and is the largest online selection of vehicle
Starting point is 01:57:03 parts and accessories. eBay. Things people love. I've got Dan Morgan here on the pod. Say hi, Dan. Hey, how's it going today? It's going good, man. Tell us who you are and what you do. I'm Dan Morgan. I'm an attorney and a managing partner at Morgan and Morgan, which is America's largest injury law firm. That's pretty awesome. I think I saw a billboard of years recently that said 20 billion one. 20 million is an insane number. Yeah, 20 billion recovered. It's actually, I think, somewhere north, probably closer to 22, 23 after this year. And each year we get bigger and badder and our army grows.
Starting point is 01:57:41 So the number will hopefully keep getting bigger and bigger as time goes on. Awesome. So how does someone get in contact with Morgan and Morgan? What would I do if I got into an accident? Probably the easiest way is dialing pound law. That's pound 529 from your cell phone. We are always open. Our call center is always waiting to take your call.
Starting point is 01:57:58 24-7-365. Wow. Dan Morgan from Morgan and Morgan, America's Large Injury Law, from thanks for coming by the show. Thanks for having me. Visit for thepeople.com for an office near you. Because they grew up in a time where there was no future in that. And then lo and behold, 20 years later, there's an insane future in that, like, in these things that didn't exist before.
Starting point is 01:58:19 And I knew that too. Like, when I was young, I was like, oh, this is, this internet thing is new. I've never seen this before. This is a whole, like, there's, a bunch of opportunity here and I knew that what I wanted to do and I knew that it was worth my time to like invest in that but because and my parents it's not like they didn't support me or anything like they were totally like down with it but they were also like they grew up in a time where that was stuff like that was like a waste of time so even though they did support me in doing that there
Starting point is 01:58:50 would always be like hey you should probably go to school even though you don't want to you should and I did and I regret going to school because it was just film shit that I was learning how to do for free online anyway. So I would just say like there is wisdom in kids when it comes to like what they want to do. You know, like I think they're more in touch with, I'll say it this way. I think kids know more about how the world will be than their parents do. I think just naturally, just because they're growing up, because they're just growing up in a time that is a little bit more ever-changing.
Starting point is 01:59:35 My parents could never have predicted the internet. And I think most people couldn't have. But like, even I knew when I was like fucking 11 that it was going to be a fucking big deal. And I would just say, yeah, just put some... Let your fucking kids explore this shit. because they might stumble across shit that's like why, like you wouldn't even have even
Starting point is 01:59:58 thought about. Also, also love. Love works, bro. No. No. Carrying on a kid works, man. It does. I mean, that should be, it should, that should be default. That should be like love your fucking kids, right? But yeah, like, to kind of
Starting point is 02:00:14 Chris's point, it's nurturing the passion is, man, that's so important. Because I was actually thinking about this recently. I was thinking, why the fuck was I playing football? I liked football, but it was not my passion. It wasn't like, oh, I want to be a football player. I was playing since I was like 10 years old or something. And then into high school.
Starting point is 02:00:33 And I finally stopped when I got injured a bunch in JV. And I'm still injured to this day. And I was like, what the fuck was that even for? And it was because, oh, my mom loved football. My mom, like, wanted me. And I remember being in Pop Warner like 10 years old. Just having no passion, even though I was good for this, I was just doing it.
Starting point is 02:00:54 Like, wow, that was awesome. And I'm like, I don't even know what I'm doing here. That was, like, that was exactly me in baseball where, like, my dad was like this big Yankees guy. He fucking loved playing. And you're like, hey, we're going to play baseball. You're going to be on a team. I was like, all right.
Starting point is 02:01:09 I guess is how the world works. I mean, I thought, I literally thought everybody was on a baseball team. Like, you just do it. I literally, like, when I was the point where I was so young and I just thought everybody did that. Like, I thought every person, every person. everywhere all over the planet. They were just like, oh, when did you join the baseball team?
Starting point is 02:01:30 And they were like, what? Yeah, dude, I don't even remember my mom asking about, because I played baseball too for a couple of years. I don't remember asking. I don't remember asking about football. I just like, you're going to do this. Like, all right, you're going. I don't, it's the weirdest fucking thing, man.
Starting point is 02:01:48 I just remember the, good, go ahead. No, I was, I was saying, I think one of my earliest memories, is just existing on a baseball team. Like, it's this flash. I have, this, this is the sequence exactly of how my memory evolves. I was like, I remember being like a baby and my sister's friend, because my sister was 10 years or 10 years older than me, her friend who was older than her picked me up. And I remember I grabbed her boob and then they put me down.
Starting point is 02:02:17 I remember this. This is like one of my earliest memories. Damn. And then I'm on a baseball team. That's the chronological Like intro to my life as far as I can remember And it's just like What the fuck? How did I end up on this baseball team?
Starting point is 02:02:33 I just played basketball I was like My grandma was like Do you want to play a sport? You don't pay instruments And I was like I don't know She was like all right
Starting point is 02:02:40 She put me in a piano It's a piano for like three years I remember barely any of it I could just play keys And I can read music And now she's just And I was like I want to play basketball She was like all right cool
Starting point is 02:02:50 So I played basketball It's like oh you're not horrible at it and I kept playing basketballs. I was like in 12th grade. And that's it. Then I just stopped because I was like, dang, the people on my team that are better than me didn't get recruited. So I ain't going no fucking where.
Starting point is 02:03:03 So I stopped and I started smoking weed. Yeah, there you go. There you go. At least she gave you an option, man. The people that I could barely defend that would get points on me were not getting, we're getting ignored. And I was like, well, fuck. my eight nine points of games and like get me into the league
Starting point is 02:03:25 fuck that bro that's what I thought about I go ahead I actually used to be pretty okay at basketball but like I just I never played it like really like I could shoot really well like I was really good at shooting and then it just like and then I didn't do it for like seven years
Starting point is 02:03:41 and I tried it again I was like ah this is gone it's all over my prescription is worse I mean right and at a certain level it's you kind of realize all right so everybody everyone's infinitely taller that's gonna really do something with this they're not gonna like it's so it's such a diamond on the rough when somebody's like in our in the five foot range that ends up in like NBA or even plays college ball and uh and that's why I thought about when I was on football I was like I was like fuck varsity and my coach was so disappointed
Starting point is 02:04:11 he was so disappointed me and I was like why so you're you're mad that I'm gonna sit on the fucking bench I was like the guy that that's that that's that that's that I'm competing. We're competing for spots. I was way short than him. This guy was probably like 6-2, 6.6.3. And he almost beat me when we were sprinting. Like I was too injured. I was like, what am I going to do? If this guy's way bigger than me and he almost beat me, what the hell could I possibly do? And he's like, I just, I just started a no man.
Starting point is 02:04:39 I was like, you're fucking, I told him that you're fucking crazy. Like you're, I'm not going to sit on the bench. I was like, I'm going to go fucking do nothing with my friends. That sounds way better. Yeah, dude. And it was. It was so much. It was so great when, like, I got that, like, when I first realized I played, because for basketball practice, we practiced every other day.
Starting point is 02:04:57 So I'd finish school and I'd go to basketball practice, like, all the time. Well, I'd say in the gym play everybody. I remember seeing you when I wasn't playing. I'd finish school and it'd be like 2.45 and I'm like, yo, what are we going to do? Like, yeah, we're going to smoke. And I was like, for what? Really? Like, like, right now, like, right after school, like, yeah, dude, we got time.
Starting point is 02:05:18 I didn't fucking do you do you it's like nah so I had so much free time available to me all of a sudden that it was overwhelming I was just like oh my I could talk to girls I can go to the mall I could I could do whatever I fucking want because I don't have to run
Starting point is 02:05:35 three miles every day thank God yeah blessings bro yeah but if you've got the part I got it yeah well hopefully that was some useful advice on
Starting point is 02:05:48 parenting from people who don't have kids. Yeah, sorry. The most important. That we know of. That we know of. That is true. I don't got any fucking kids. I'm fairly confident.
Starting point is 02:05:59 I would have found out by now. You don't know that. I would have got a friend of note. Someone could totally just be like, okay, they were so ashamed, and then it just gone on too long. And too long to the point where it's like, oh, my God, I got to say something at some point. And then finally, hey, here is your fucking 10-year-old son.
Starting point is 02:06:16 ashamed of me that's not my kid that's not my kid it's been 10 years it's not my kid but it's 10 years that's not my kid it could be that's not my kid
Starting point is 02:06:28 come on 10 years ago I'm like you can't expect me to raise this all right all right I think that's about the time that we got for today uh
Starting point is 02:06:38 Jesus Christ if you like what you heard today consider supporting us over at patreon.com slash the snar Tank, $1 a month gets you early access to every episode and access to bonus solo episodes, of which there are currently three. There will be another one that I will be doing solo about, I think, in about a week and a half, probably after E3 is when I'll do mine. $5 gets you an opportunity for a question to be read on the show. $10 gets you access to the Discord server.
Starting point is 02:07:11 That's one payment that you're in for good. and 25 gets your name dyslexically red at the end of the show, which I will now do. Count me down. Okay. Three, two, one. Nikki Ziggy, when the bullet hits the bow, Chris, can you get me...
Starting point is 02:07:32 What? An in with shoe. I'm 25 and single. Hey, oh. Hey, man, shoot your shot, but I can't help you. A vex simulation, don sexual. Tell him Steve Dave This is the Star Tank podcast saying
Starting point is 02:07:46 Happy 20th birthday to Misha K Also come man come back Seven What is it? Trashbag 7 Otaku Bernal God there's a lot of new names What the fuck is going on? Are these new people or are you guys fucking with me?
Starting point is 02:08:00 Yeah, because who the hell's Misha? I never heard of Misha before. Yeah, I never heard of that either We're growing bro, slow, steady growth Yeah My gay is name and I Sweeney the Tom Hate. Thank you.
Starting point is 02:08:13 Thank you for that. Jesus Christ. Asoka is my wifu. Bra man from the Fifth Flow. It's a character from the Martin show. I've never seen Martin. I don't remember that character. I don't remember it at all.
Starting point is 02:08:28 I was watching like the Parker's and stuff, but like I never saw Martin. Martin. Ethan Cox is dead now. I'm Ethan Cock. Jesus. Keith Dactyl. Keith David. Willie Wonka's come-diddly umptious bar.
Starting point is 02:08:43 Not gay Ben. Parentheses, I'm not gay. Parentheses. No, really, I'm not. Parentheses. Seriously, I swear I'm not. You have to believe me. The fireball, little Sweeney threw and killed God.
Starting point is 02:08:55 White guilt paying his reparations, but not guilty enough to shorten my name, take my money. John Strickland. Boo Sniggins. Merks. Merks. The milkman that looks like Chris. Dank magician of chaos. Adi's janitorial assistant.
Starting point is 02:09:10 assistant, sanguine Keith David. There's a lot of Keith David's because it was his birthday. That makes sense. Jack McCann, the Irish man, who, just kidding, is, it's Keith David, you stupid bastards. When in doubt, spooge it out. The first church of Keith David, remember the
Starting point is 02:09:26 day of our lord. Goups McKenzie, Levi Sutton, D. Ildew, Appa Yiff, oh my God. Femboy Hooters waiter. Lately, car buying has become a pretty dull experience. But on eBay, behind every car in part is a story waiting to be shared.
Starting point is 02:09:45 There was a guy who bought a 2020 Porsche Cayman GT4 on eBay. It was well loved. There are plenty of Caymans in great condition on eBay, but this one needed some work. That's just the start of the story. So after this guy gets a great deal on his dream car, he rebuilds the whole thing with all these parts he found on eBay. Performance brakes, suspension, body panels, the works, guaranteed to fit.
Starting point is 02:10:08 Next thing you know, this nearly scrapped Cayman was out there on the track as a full-blown race car. You're ready to go daily driver. Your next Restamod. Hello, Lodda Salon, hand the parts to finish it. eBay has thousands of cars and is the largest online selection of vehicle parts and accessories. eBay. Things people love.
Starting point is 02:10:28 I've got Dan Morgan here on the pod. Say hi, Dan. Hey, how's it going today? It's going good, man. Tell us who you are and what you do. I'm Dan Morgan. I'm an attorney and a managing partner at Morgan and Morgan, which is America's largest injury.
Starting point is 02:10:41 law firm. That's pretty awesome. I think I saw billboarded years recently that said 20 billion one. 20 million is an insane number. Yeah, 20 billion recovered. It's actually, I think somewhere north, probably closer to 22, 23 after this year. And each year we get bigger and batter and our army grows. So the number will hopefully keep getting bigger and bigger as time goes on. Awesome. So how does someone get in contact with Morgan and Morgan? What would I do if I got into an accident? Probably the easiest way is dialing pound law. That's pound. down 529 from your cell phone. We are always open.
Starting point is 02:11:14 Our call center is always waiting to take your call. 24-7, 365. Wow. Dan Morgan. From Morgan and Morgan, America's Large Injury Lawfram, thanks for coming by the show. Thanks for having me. Visit furtherpeople.com for an office near you. Sammy and his big titty-fishing, Keith David,
Starting point is 02:11:30 drunken Keith David. A dick in the hand is worth two in the ass. Okay. That's so stupid. Pre-Raz, Chris Farley, Death Egg. Tiny Asian man. And one of the real biological sons of Tom Sweeney. Ah, you see, you got a son out here.
Starting point is 02:11:49 Substitute come man, Blake 896, the epic Oshawa, silly putty eater, future Hendrix, the Messiah of Misogyny, Ace Man, fucking kill me, Keith David, Paul Joseph Watson, dunking on Chris. Oh, I forgot about that. Oh, shit, that's the big thing they didn't talk about. Next time. We'll fucking do it next time. I totally forgot.
Starting point is 02:12:08 Wow. Top 10 anime betrayals. I can't believe I forgot that. Our cat recently broke his foot. Can you help us fix Dokes foot on GoFundMe? Help us. I guess there's a fucking broken cat on GoFundMe that you can go fix.
Starting point is 02:12:26 A broken cat. Hey boss, I've captured all three of the Star Trinity. Now I don't have to crave the embrace of a human being. You guys are fucking out of your mind. God damn it. It takes forever to load too. Ryan Luchessey, amassing an army of hairless chimps to take over the government and return to monkey.
Starting point is 02:12:42 Sloshy, scy. out. Keith David. The Dark Loader was naked after getting resurrected. Doom Slayer got to see his slung. The Snark Tank Cruise Femboy cum slut that's locked in the sex dungeon and loves it. God help us. Tom Sweeney, the atrocious alien fucker. Please go check my podcast called How Do We get here every Thursday. Leroyro Jenkins. Hope you guys like Weezer. Tom boys are the ultimate straight man's choice unlike space gypsies. Hard hat skydiver. Hey you, you're finally awake. You were trying to cross the Gaza Strip, right? Walked right into that Israeli
Starting point is 02:13:16 ambush. Oh, you switched it up. He switched it up. Twisted. Hey-oh. Thank you for switching it up. I appreciate that. Keith David again. Fuck you, Chris. My name will be as long as I want. I pay $25 for this shit. Keith David's Captain Anderson
Starting point is 02:13:32 should have been a romance option in Mass Effect. I agree. But there would have been, there would have been some impropriety there, given, you know. Your ass is so juicy, Shepard. Oh my God. I'll fuck you read than that. I've never,
Starting point is 02:13:45 I've never seen such a luscious cock shepherd. I'm rather starstruck. It's so shiny and long. Keith David, the Arbiter of Teabags, Alaskan oil field trash, Juan Punchman, Marcus Shorten, Keith David.
Starting point is 02:13:58 I blew up a litter of kittens, call it bomb pussy. Papa Nergel. Blend the baby shake shack. Fuck you, Paul Joseph Watson, you maladjusted jacking any. Drying. Damn, I can't believe we forgot.
Starting point is 02:14:10 Driving a car. driving a car into Helen Parr's parachute pussy Oh my God Game Controller 25 Dick Vaney and the Pussy administration Murder ascended Keith David the dyslexic that feels Chris's pain For the love of Christ
Starting point is 02:14:25 Please talk about Matt Gates I'm begging you Lobotomized Jesus and his 12 Downy disciples diddle dogs Diddle dogs for doge coin Haco Unleash the Archers Is one of my favorite bands I think Chris and Derek would like Try the album Apex
Starting point is 02:14:39 I've actually heard heard of Unleash the Archers. I listen to it. They have that lady singer and they're like kind of, what's that, what's that power metal? Yeah, yeah. It's like, yeah, yeah. I think I've heard a little bit of it. Yeah, they ain't bad.
Starting point is 02:14:52 I'll check out that album. Seven-year-old fetus. Moto Zealot. Hey, you, you're fine. Oh, so there's like two? Wait. What? That can't be.
Starting point is 02:15:05 Yeah, there's two. Hey, oh. Is it the same? No way. Hey, you. You're finally awake. You're trying to cross the border, right? Walked right into that imperial ambush, same as us.
Starting point is 02:15:16 Okay, so this is a new person shaking your name up. Way to go, hey you. Calypses. Hiroshima's Spicy Mushrooms. Is this hard to read because I'm running out of ideas, to be honest? Dummy Thick Dave. Heartless Wretch, aka the Ebony Goblin from the dump of New York City. I give it a 9.5 out of 10.
Starting point is 02:15:35 That's a pretty nice cock. JFK's mind-blowing cherry pie recipes. Master Chief, you mind telling me what you're doing in Epstein's cell? Sir, suicide. Yummy, yummy, yummy, come inside my tummy. Keith, Absege, David, badly braids, jolly old dipshit, hugger, Derek, movie theater manager. Are you not an assistant manager anymore?
Starting point is 02:15:53 Did you get promoted? Congratulations. Congrats, bro. That's a really subversive way of saying that. Keith Eury and David, Chris Gap My Pergerian Hunting Ass, and we're finally at the last page, last handful, deflated left ass cheek, all hands on dick, Arrow, Sunny Chance, Melfis 1 killed Dr. Drew,
Starting point is 02:16:08 and you let me edit Wikipedia, I can prove it. Richter 86. And as always, Keith David. Oh. And that's him. That's him. Okay.
Starting point is 02:16:24 I'm going to say King of Haphazzard anyway, because I have to say it. If it's not him, then I feel sick. Yeah, I'll be sick if we lost King of Haphaazard. But thank you guys for stopping by. I'm going to go edit this now, and it'll be up on time. All right. We'll see you soon.
Starting point is 02:16:44 Don't say the N-word in public if you're not the right color. Peace out. Or just do it. If you want something done right, you do it yourself. That's why you change your own oil. You wouldn't trust your engine to just anybody. So go with the full synthetic motor oil you can trust. Penn's Oil Ultra Platinum offers engine protection for the lifetime of your vehicle.
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