The Snark Tank - #87: Baldwin Blitz

Episode Date: November 8, 2021

AdamandEve.com. Code: SNARK. 50% Off 1 Item + Free Shipping in the US & Canada *some exclusions apply* Is Alec Baldwin an evil greature? Would Tom Holland kill with a blunderbuss? GTA Vice City being censored? Resident Evil VR censored? Tom Sweeny is an OJ Simp-son? Do humans taste like rabbits? When did the backlight happen? What were some viral trends when we were in high school? Why are you an idiot and stupid? All that and more answered on todays episode of Late Episode Again, How Sad, Oh How Sad Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

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Today's episode of the Snark Tank podcast, sponsored by Adam and Eve.com. And you can use code Snark to get 50% off of your first item plus free shipping anywhere in the United States and Canada. It's a crazy world out there, and it could use a little bit of spice. And Adam and Eve's got you covered. They got sex toys. They got lingerie. They got all sorts of bath and body stuff. Some bath bombs, if you like.

It's also worth noting that 2021 is Adam and Eve's 50th anniversary, which is pretty insane. They've been at this for 50 fucking years. And 20% of their profits go to fighting the spread of HIV around the world. So what are you waiting for? 50% discount, fight HIV, celebrate an anniversary. Head on over to animeeve.com right now and use code snark for that 50% off. And, uh, on with the episode. Do you guys talk to Kyle Kalinsky or anyone?

Any of you talked to him at all? Uh, no. Oh, he, uh, he just came out as, uh, gay. Shut up. No. Nice. Hey, look. It's a little dead meme.

It's a little bit of me. Hey, look. I know this. Welcome to the SmartTink podcast. It is me, one of your host, Tom Sweeney. And we're here with some black guy and Chris Reagan. It's me. Say hello.

It's me. I didn't. I sound like a drug. I was fucking bullshit. Who me? I sound like a cook head. Like how they act like they're normal? Hey.

How's it going? I've seen that, dude. I thought you're on opiate, so you're just like, hey, it's the snark tank. You're like, you're just feeling good. I was like, what the hell's going on here? I'm sorry. I'm announcing things and I feel like fine, I guess. But hey, another episode of this bullshit, whatever we do.

Chris is feeling a little down and out, so I'll be doing a lot of the talking today. Chris is, he's broken. I caught, I got AIDS over the weekend. So I'm wrestling through that. You can probably hear it in my voice. I'm sure you can. He actually got into a fight with Magic Johnson. Yeah, yeah.

Obviously, he lost. Blood was drawn. He actually bled directly into my mouth. Okay, don't forget to come to our... Don't forget if you guys want to bring us a little bit of money. We are at patreon.com slash a snark tank. Drop a dollar there. You can get an early episode.

You know, $5. We'll get you... Don't worry about that. Don't worry about that. That's the end. That's the end. Listen. We got a lot of stuff to talk about today

Of course, because it's the curse with this podcast To the point where I'm actually just, I'm considering moving the days around in the near future Because we're cursed with this shit Because every time we record we're like Fucking nothing happened Kanye's got weird hair or something And then the next day, Alec Baldwin kills a man

Oh man No, he kills a woman Oh yeah, that's right And he injures a man Almost killed a man and he was like, damn. He's like one and a half. Shit. I only killed one whole person.

It's always just the day after we record. Some crazy shit happened. Was it literally on Tuesday? It was, but either way. Either way, we missed it and it's annoying. We missed it by like a very, huge news. Yeah, we missed it by like a very close margin. And it was just like, in the next couple episodes,

maybe like for the new year I'm thinking of maybe doing a switchup I won't tell you what that switchup is but if this happens even one more time man like it has been I like it's the change is imminent

because I'm getting sick of this shit where we're like ah what do you guys know what happened this week? I don't know I think the problem is a lot of stuff happens negative stuff happens towards the end of the week because people are just fucking tired you know what I mean

yeah yeah Dude, okay, the whole Alec Ballas situation So if you guys don't know Alec Baldwin shot You shot somebody Who doesn't know at this point? He thought he thought he thought he's in a prop gun I don't know the entire story

I heard some days where he was waving around I got all of it because I was kind of fascinated You got all of this is 100% fact Yeah I got the gist of what you need to know essentially because I was like I was like how did this happen? I was like this is when you fucked up with Brandon Lee it was like that was already enough. You killed the prodigy, you know?

And it was like that's already, now we need safe precautions. But what happened was there wasn't safety. Like the production of Russ, the movie, that's the set that they were on about, it's a movie about some kid that wrongfully killed someone too, which is extremely ironic. You know,

that's already ironic in itself. that it's like how this is crazy and then uh before before i explained what happened the the production the russ productions had the audacity to release a statement and say the safety of our cast and crew is top priority and i'm like you can't like responding to what happened i was like you can't say that at this point you're supposed to skip that part must be like unfortunately something happened someone died forward they're like well actually you can't say that you can't that. Yeah, it's like a crazy situation too because didn't like, uh, I think the entire staff or whatever, like the film, um, like the, the hand, like the crew, like walked off set

for some reason because it was like a union thing. People walked. Yeah, it was like people were walking because there was actually hard hours. It was like it was kind of like what's happening a little bit in the gaming industry, right? Just we're crunching way too hard. You're not paying us enough. The conditions aren't safe. I mean, I don't know if you were just hearing about what happening with Ruby Rose or whatever her name is and Batwoman and stuff you were hearing like shit like people are just getting abused I think even more

because of the pandemic. So a bunch of people like we're out of here so then they found cheap replacements and then people were cutting corners and then the gun the prop guns were cleared at first but then you have to check things multiple times right to make sure everything's cool

and then so it wasn't done again Alec Baldwin thought he had the green line He's like, I'm going to practice my fucking my cool shit. Then he pointed his shit over at the director, you know, in the fucking camera. And the blah, bra, bra, the fucking director, right? He saw the cinematographer hold her stomach like, oh shit, she got hit. And he was like, what's happening? And by the time he couldn't even know what was happening, all of a sudden he's hit on the shoulder.

So he just like, I would bother. I just, the way that I'm picturing it is, you know, the scene in the first Batman when Jack Nicholson's killing that dude, where he's just doing all these. like trick shots and shit. Like I was, I'm picturing like, I'm picturing like, what was he doing?

Because he probably thought he was like a fucking stud. And then he's like, oh my God. Yeah. I actually shot people. What makes it crazy is that like, I, look,

I usually love fucking with people. But I actually feel bad. It's like that's because aside from him, you know, aside from him, obviously, they're not being enough weapon safety. on the place, that is some shit like, like if someone hands me a prop gun, right?

I'm, I am anxious enough and scared enough to be like, I'm going to make sure this doesn't have any bullets in it. That's what I'm going to do. But like when you blanks are not bullets. Yeah. They're held in like different things. Like I've shot real bullets and I've shot blanks before. And I don't know how the fuck you fuck those up because blanks are like labeled.

And they even look different. Like there's different marking on the bullet shells for blanks. So like I don't know how I don't know how I don't know how like say for example. If they did something different to just be like, oh, well, we'll just make we'll just kind of do some makeshift ones on the fly. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't get how that could be your job to like, hey, put fake bullets in this gun.

I think the biggest argument, dude, I think the biggest argument is now, is that even at this point, is that even needed? Yeah, yeah. Yeah, no, I know what you're, no, I know what you're talking about because why even have any bullets in the gun at all? Because you can create the craziest shit with CGI. People will like deage people with CGI. Why not just CG the fucking gun smoke? It is probably like the simplest fucking effect that you could possibly... To the point where I've done it.

Like I don't load... I don't have any real guns that I've loaded with fucking blanks. Anytime I've used like an actual gun. And I use like cheap effects, but sometimes they look okay. And sometimes I would... There was one time I remember I did it like a long time ago when I was fucking around with premiere and I was like, this looks genuinely fucking good.

Like, and I didn't need to load it with like blanks to get that effect. For real, that you are... You guys are right. But like, I was watching like, I was watching like, um, like this thing was like affects people talk about what they're doing. So I like, you know, like real swordsman talking about like, oh, I prefer to use a real blade, not a live one, not one that's like sharp. But I prefer to use a real blade because when you clash the real blade, you can feel the way. And it does some of the acting for you, you know, having a real weapon, having something real.

I, like, I can very much so see why you wouldn't want to use a gun. at all. I would put a fake gun in my hand. I would photoshop a gun in my hand and I'd use that. But first, like when you when you use a real gun, the kick, it just makes it look more realistic. I don't think you need a forever movie he was doing. Like maybe in a military movie, you might want a real weapon for like- There's only like certain, let me think about this. There's only certain people that it's going to annoy that like, oh, I can tell this is fucking fake. Like say like, you know, Nilda Grass Tyson, I remember him talking about, um, Titanic.

And he was like, well, actually, if you look up at the stars on the sky, the constellations aren't where there are a lot. I'm like, dude, it's just supposed to be some bitch fucking chilling and then this dumb ass drowning. Like, who cares that the constellations are incorrect?

Like, where they were actually sitting. And I'm like, okay, that's the person. I know, I know, but what happens is this. This is what happens with this. But actually, you're a bitch. I am an ex-film student like Chris. actually sweetly all the communications kids and what we did we were younger we would sit down and we would tear apart movies for what's wrong with them and people are gonna do that

people like actually no that's fun though that's fun i actually enjoy that they're just they're just trying to tighten up people just like to tighten up like oh i'm gonna use a real gun because it feels more authentic and it gives the actors more drive and then niggas get shot and then that happens Yes, exactly. And it's just like, okay, in all fairness, I feel really bad for Alec Baldwin. Like, I understand there was a lot of shit gone wrong. But like, God damn, there's pictures of him like on the side of the street, like on a phone crying. Yeah, yeah.

Like, really like having a breakdown. I have actively avoided that. I'm trying to not humanize it. Of course it's sad. That's why I haven't made fun of it. I have so many jokes. The way that's how. how you think about, think about doctors and people in the military, you know, the service people.

Think about these type of people that deal with death on a daily basis. This is exactly how they deal with stuff. Success starts with your drive. An American public university is here to fuel it. With affordable tuition and over 200 flexible online programs, APU helps you gain the skills and confidence to move forward. Whether you're changing careers, starting fresh, or pursuing a lifelong passion, Our programs are designed for people who never stop. You bring the fire, APU will fuel the journey.

Learn more at APU.APUS.edu. I've got Dan Morgan here on the pod. Say hi, Dan. Hey, how's it going today? It's going good, man. Tell us who you are and what you do. I'm Dan Morgan. I'm an attorney and a managing partner at Morgan and Morgan,

which is America's largest injury law firm. That's pretty awesome. I think I saw Billboard of years recently that said 20 billion one. 20 billion is an insane number. Yeah, 20 billion recovered. It's actually, I think, somewhere north, probably closer to 22, 23 after this year.

And each year we get bigger and batter and our army grows. So the number will hopefully keep getting bigger and bigger as time goes on. Awesome. So how does someone get in contact with Morgan and Morgan? What would I do if I got into an accident? Probably the easiest way is dialing pound law.

That's pound 529 from your cell phone. We are always open. Our call center is always waiting to take your call. 24 7, 365. Wow. Dan Morgan. From Morgan and Morgan, America's Large Injury Law,

from thanks for coming by the show. Thanks for having me. Visit for the people.com for an office near you. Because if they were to just wallow in darkness, like the way that you want to be like, oh, this is so sad. They'll just fucking kill themselves eventually. My, my grandmother,

who's like, who's lost people on the table in surgeries, she's like it's really, really, really fucking sad. And they give you days off. that shit happens. They're like, hey, go home and take some time because you can only dehumanize it so much. Like, it's the internet age. And we're definitely a different breed from like them that were like, you know, like, oh, something fucked up happens. I've been on live leak. My grandmother would go on live leak and have a nervous breakdown. Right. After seeing that shit, but us were all desensitized to people just getting mortally wounded all the time. And for me, it's just a situation. It's like,

oh man because I could happen to anybody. Someone can just like, here's a prop gun. The thing is, it's like, you have to wonder though, like, what the fuck is a live? What is a live round doing on set in the first place? That is the thing that's freaking me out a little bit because it's like, part of me is like, this can't have been entirely an accident. You know what I mean? Like, I don't necessarily, I don't think Alec Baldwin loaded.

Like, there's, it's insane. He definitely didn't load the gun as an actor. They wouldn't let him load the gun. Yeah, they wouldn't let him load the gun. And also just in general, like, that's... Alec Baldwin's not going to do that to himself. He's not going to put, like, a loaded fucking gun in his hand on a movie set and then ruin his life. Like, he has, like, no incentive to do that.

Yeah, it's his movie. So, part of me, part of me's wondering, it's like, I wonder, like, who the fuck put a live round in his fucking gun? That is the mystery of it. That's what makes it crazy. Why the fuck are there live rounds anywhere? Like, why do actors ever need live rounds? Well, it's just like saying with Brandon, with Brandon Lee, like it's not like they thought the rounds were live, right? You know, it's like, oh.

But that's even more mystery. That's even more mystery on top of it. Well, to me, what it just seems is because a lot of the, what they talked about is like cutting corners and stuff. Right. So I'm like, people could have just, it's, it's a. Essentially, you get what you pay for. You know what I mean? If they didn't fucking, if they would have just done shit by the books and not, you know,

like say a lot of productions. And for years and years, there's probably people have been cutting corners. And this shit didn't happen. And then it's like it only takes one time, right? For someone to just fuck up. And then now they're in this situation. And look, it's obviously the whole thing sad. I mean, say if you think about it, if you think about the family, the loss and all that stuff

and how Alec Baldwin must feel he's probably losing his mind, you know, it's probably going to stupor into. depression and all this stuff from, you know, you know, ending a life on accident, dude, that's crazy. Like, it's, it's way worse that way than if he did it on purpose. Because otherwise, he'd probably be like, you know, fucking, like, whatever. Like, he's going to go to jail and shit. And be like, fucking, you know, getting the dust off his shoulder and shit. Like, oh, that show is dope.

Now, now wait. No, now wait for me to get away with this, you know? Like, and then it's just, it's pretty sad. But that's why I like the, I'm going to, I appreciate the memes, though. because it's just it's bringing light to like a dark situation and I think a lot of people don't understand that. I haven't. I haven't partaken it.

Even I said, I was like, yo, it's chill. Like, chill out guys. Like, it's unfortunate. I definitely whipped out some Photoshop like real quick. I was like, I got to, I just did. All I did was the, I was just like, I wanted to test the waters. And I only had one person. I was like, dude.

And everybody else was like, that's kind of funny. It was just the shining. You know, I just had them like put the gun to the. door instead of the axe and then he would put his face up to the door and i was just like i'm holland what if tom holland shot and killed somebody by mistake did you imagine i got on our trin't you know he would not say he would be crying he'd be crying he'd be crying for the rest of his life he'd be back and he's a one one he's a kid i shot a person he's a bloke i shot a bloke mate what i'm what i'm what i go do because they don't have guns and have blunderbuss and shit so he'd be like oh no i've gone

run bum somebody up i can't believe i done this and then he loses Spider-Man deals. Freaking, what you call it, no way home doesn't come out, and it just changed his reality. You think Tom Holland would choose somebody with a fucking blunderbuss? He just loads a bunch of scrams in it.

A blunders or a flint lock and stuff. They have fucking pistols, they have fucking blunderbuss and freaking marionettes. Marionettes. Not marionettes. Where are they called? I was like, isn't that like? Bayanets?

I don't know what you're trying to say. Oh, a bayonet. They have the flints, man. Like, fucking, they got pistols. They got, they got some good shit. Why do they use knives so old?

Can you imagine though? That's all they have though. Like legit they never upgraded. They have just old. They have fucking 16th century guns. Can you imagine? A blunderbuss is scary, man. A blunderbust is like I would not want to go up against.

If somebody is robbing your house and they have a fucking blunderbuss, that is like, that is a person. That's a person. That's a person. You run away from that person because you're going to find, you're going to get killed by, like, he's loading that shit with your baby team, you know? with biscuits and fucking what else do they have over there

just bent up fucking spoons and forks he bends them and puts them in there you're like yo what the fuck is wrong with this man what do they use over there what is rocks rocks and knives bro what are they what are they known like tea packages and shit like they're just putting whatever

whatever they can anything man bro so fucking you're about to be it's fucking broken fucking teapots and shit like that put in there It's like, yo, this is going to slaughter someone. What is wrong with you?

I don't care, bro. We'll go and go boom. I'd actually feel bad. You're just going to be buried, and they're going to have to pry the dry food out of your fucking skull. It's going to be a sad, sad state of affairs. I fucking love how our bear it.

So did you guys, we, I don't know how much more. we can delve into Alec Baldwin. But I did want to talk about this, because this is something that just came up that I saw a little bit earlier today. Success starts with your drive,

and American Public University is here to fuel it. With affordable tuition and over 200 flexible online programs, APU helps you gain the skills and confidence to move forward. Whether you're changing careers, starting fresh, or pursuing a lifelong passion, our programs are designed for people who never stop. You bring the fire, APU will fuel the journey.

Learn more at APU.apus.edu.edu. I've got Dan Morgan here on the pod. Say hi, Dan. Hey, how's it going today? It's going good, man. Tell us who you are and what you do. I'm Dan Morgan. I'm an attorney and a managing partner at Morgan and Morgan,

which is America's largest injury law firm. That's pretty awesome. I think I saw a billboard of yours recently that said $20 billion. $1.20 million is an insane number. Yeah, 20 billion recovered. It's actually, I think, somewhere north, probably closer to 22, 23 after this year. And each year we get bigger and batter and our army grows. So the number will hopefully keep getting bigger and bigger as time goes on. Awesome. So how does someone get in contact with Morgan and Morgan? What would I do if I got into an accident? Probably the easiest way is dialing pound law. That's pound 529 from your cell phone. We are always open. Our call center is always waiting to take your call. 24-7, 365. Wow. Dan Morgan, from Morgan and Morgan. America's Large Injury Law from, thanks for coming by the show.

Thanks for having me. Visit for the people.com for an office near you. I don't know if you guys saw this. And I don't know how you guys feel about it. But there's a new line of GTA remasters coming out. It's like the trilogy is like getting its definitive edition or whatever. So it's Grand Theft Auto Vice City, Grand Theft Auto 3, and Grand The Therapeuticada, San Andreas is all redone and like new graphics and shit. And it's coming out kind of soon.

Yeah, I'm excited. There's an article written here that shows, this is GTA trilogy trailer removes Confederate flag. Because there's a guy from three. From Vice City from Phil Cassidy. Phil Cassidy is the character. He has a shirt with a Confederate flag. And now it's like just like a yellow skull. Yeah.

Uh-huh. I did see that. Yeah. And I'm looking at it and I'm just like. I don't understand what the point is because... You know what the point is. It's that it's stupid. I know it's stupid, but it's just...

I don't under... Because I, like, I tweeted about it. I was like, this is some... I too, I was like, this is like pussy shit. Like, I don't understand why you can't have a villainous character associated with villainous imagery. You know, the call duty, like, one of the most recent call duty games that has... That has to do with World War II doesn't have any Nazi flags in it,

even though you fight the Nazis. They don't even say Nazi in it. It's like, fuck it's so weird about that it's so bizarre it's it's it's it's really strange it gets that's strange that's that's really strange yeah absolutely yeah it gets really weird because like i understand like i get it you know like i get why i don't get it at all i get why i get why i get why i get because you know people people people get it's like more people are looking at things some people are going to get offended people are going to have to say but it's grant that auto

doing it i know i know i see it in a different way though. When I first heard about this, I thought it was just maybe just to add a little bit extra buzz because I really I was really thinking about that because I don't know anyone I don't know anyone who would genuinely

it's just kind of giving me flashback. It's remnants of 2016 2014. It's just giving me I'm like okay there was a it's like Neil Druckman consulting Anita Sarkeesian or some shit. Like things that are I'm like, what are you doing?

Like that's, you're asking someone who's trying to, you know, look at me. That's trying to peacock, right? Yeah, yeah. It's like, look at me and look at this problem that no one would have ever said anything unless I fucking said something. Because who's really going to say something about that fucking asshole shirt? Yeah. Like, that's the thing.

It's like, it's not for anybody. It's like a very weird thing because it's like, to me, it's like, we're in a very weird spot when you can't have a fictional awful character associated with awful imagery that the game acknowledges this awful by virtue of associating with an awful character in a game meant for adults you know like it's it's like what are they gonna do are they gonna take

are they gonna take the drug addict guy out of GTA 5 because he says a bunch of racially charged shit all the time you know and also it's a game where you go around and kill every fucking person Like you could just murder indiscriminately and it's just so fucking weird like at what point Tone down those pussies that get so mad about that but it's like imagine imagine Not around no right they these people don't exist nobody's offended by this like they're they're fake people and and it's like real no real they're real they're real they're no they're fake and they don't really exist but they're loud and they're prevalent on the internet they're like a imaginary numbers. They're like numbers that you can take out of their

and have the right numbers still. You can still put a one X to the 10, 5, 15th power and you can take them out and the world will be fine without them. That is. But on the internet, they'll type, they'll type up data like, oh my God, can't believe conservative flag in GTA. No man. The fact that you brought that you compared them to imaginary numbers is a great

comparison actually. But it's not bad at all It's not bad at all It's insignificant digits Sig figs Bro, they're not Sig figs But they're on the internet

And they exist In a complaint here The main thing to me That like at what point Is it like all right So this is a bad flag It's associated with bad things All right

At what point Do we like revisit Like the Lion King Right And go like Well Murder's kind of bad Isn't it?

Like it's kind of a bad thing We don't necessarily want to associate our kids cartoon with murder. So maybe, instead of, you know, Scar killing Mufasa, maybe Scar just calls him, you know, really silly. Maybe Scar goes, oh, Mufasa, you're so fucking silly. And Mufasa goes, ooh, Scar, you're fucking mean. I'm going to leave and abandon my son now,

because I don't want to be called silly. And that's the new Lion King. Like, at what point can you have a character that is villainous, and that's okay. Like, it's just very bizarre. They did the same thing, by the way, to... I'm playing Resident Evil 4 in VR, which, by the way, awesome.

Really fucking cool. But they took out all of these, like, little lines that he and Ingrid share on the comms. It's, like, because he's, like, flirtatious with her. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And, like, that's all gone. So now Leon is just this dude who's like, I'm going to go here and save the president.

daughter and it's like he's like nothing he's like he's got no character at all it's really and even one of the shitty characters who's meant to be shitty where he goes like there's a line in the original Resident Evil 4 where he goes like I see the president has equipped his daughters with ballistics as well and then the daughter's like how rude you're a fucking asshole like what do you mean you suck fuck you and that's all God now he just says ho ho I'm not even getting That is the line they're replacing. The little person I forgot his name.

No, no, that's Salazar. Talazar. I'm talking about Louise. The guy, like the slimy, like ex-cop, Spaniard who's, like, in the dresser. Like, he doesn't, he's, he doesn't say anything now. And it's like, what the fuck is going on?

But you can still get your head cut off by Chase. All right? Yeah, but you can still shoot Spaniards. You can, the first scene in that game is still Leon Kennedy walking into a Spaniard's house without their consent. And he's like, What are you doing in my house? I'm protecting my house. Get out of here.

And you kill him indiscriminately and it's fine and you do not elaborate any further. Like he's all, he's all, I have to neutralize a hostel. I'm like, what do you? Yeah. He's like I had no choice but to neutralize him. And it's like you broke into this man's house. And as he was trying to defend himself from the European invader, you shot his head until it popped.

You man It happens, bro But he can't But he can't Flirt with the computer What happened is we're We're teetering towards that line Of everyone's being a little too safe

About things Like there are lines Obviously there are lines You know Yeah But everyone's getting a little too safe About like oh you can't do this And you can't have your fans do

Like That's just It's there has to If they're Without villains we're not gonna know Who the heroes are exactly you know. I guess so for like people like Scar Scar's a bad guy and Scar goes out his way to show you he's a bad guy. If you start new, if you start removing things like that, you're not going to be able to tell stories the right way, you know.

Like Green Goblin threw Gwen Stacy off a bridge and potentially he killed her or Peter killed her, you know. Imagine they make a new movie like from Spider-Man and they have that part. And it's just like Green Goblins like, I really don't like you, Spider-Man. And then he just goes and he knocks Gwen Stacey's purse out of her hands. It's like, what the fuck is this is the same story? Her purse breaks and it's like, I'm breaking up with you. Spider-Man, you're a real big jerky pants. Yeah.

And obviously, by the way, I'm exaggerating, obviously. Like, there's no way we're going to get a Lion King movie where Mufasa abandoned Simba because he's called silly by Scar. I'm just saying it's like, it's just very weird that you can't have villainous characters. associated with villainous imagery. Like, especially like, I feel like movies are so mature, right? Well, the thing is, in America, that's not villainous exactly anymore.

That's the thing. The Confederate flag? Like, it's not, I don't even know if that's what's happening, though. I think it's, like, more trivial than that. I hope so. Well, like, what, because it's these little things that don't matter.

Not, it's these little, they don't matter. The only thing I'm trying to think, I'm starting to think about is, who is, I'm thinking back to when the Mass Effect Legendary Edition came out and there was a guy, I forgot his name,

I wish I remembered it because I would love to you know, kind of shit on him because he was like, I don't understand these scenes showing Miranda Lawson's ass like what is the point of this and which is like one of the most assenine things you could say you don't understand what is the point?

I'm like, are you? And I'm saying like, Are you genuinely fucking with me that you don't know why this is a thing? Like he was saying it as if like, let's take these out because they don't make sense. I'm like, they're, they make sense. Miranda has a juicy ass and they're showing it. And her open. She's genetically modified to be extremely attractive.

She says it herself, you know, explaining that she has an advantage for everything. But it doesn't matter. I don't want to get into that. But I'm just saying that he took that out. It's like these people that are in charge of certain things or taking these things out. the people are like, what are you doing? And it feels like, Grant the Fado could be the same thing. Somebody like that one dude could have been like, I don't like this. I don't like this. Success starts with your drive. An American public university is here to fuel it. With affordable

tuition and over 200 flexible online programs, APU helps you gain the skills and confidence to move forward. Whether you're changing careers, starting fresh, or pursuing a lifelong passion, Our programs are designed for people who never stop. You bring the fire, APU will fuel the journey. Learn more at APU.APUS.edu. I've got Dan Morgan here on the pod. Say hi, Dan. Hey, how's it going today?

It's going good, man. Tell us who you are and what you do. I'm Dan Morgan. I'm an attorney and a managing partner at Morgan and Morgan, which is America's largest injury law firm. That's pretty awesome. I think I saw a billboard of years recently that said 20 billion

20 million is an insane number. Yeah, 20 billion recovered. It's actually, I think, somewhere north, probably closer to 22, 23 after this year. And each year we get bigger and badder and our army grows. So the number will hopefully keep getting bigger and bigger as time goes on. Awesome. So how does someone get in contact with Morgan and Morgan? What would I do if I got into an accident?

Probably the easiest way is dialing pound law. That's pound 529 from your cell phone. We are always open. Our call center is always waiting to take your call. 24 7, 365. Wow. Dan Morgan. From Morgan and Morgan,

America's Large Injury Law, from thanks for coming by the show. Thanks for having me. Visit for thepeople.com for an office near you. I want to take it out, and then it's taken out, because who else is it effect? Just some fucking lunatic

that just has a position of power. Yeah, like there's just no way anybody would have complained about it. You know, like I just, I can't imagine that those people are real. And I feel like it's like, I have to say, I know, imaginary numbers. I get it.

But who complained about Miranda's ass? Like really? There's people out there, man. It was celebrating. No, like, who really? It was, dude, that ass was celebrated. That, like, across the board. Everybody's seen that shit.

I've been done seeing it. Listen, I could. What's this nigga gonna say right now? I could see it in, in that one scene where she's, like, being like, you know, I forget what she says, but she's like. She's like, she's saying, like, oh, my mother. My fucking, my cousin, Anne Frank was, like, just hiding. And it's just like, and then, like, during this, like, like,

like really, really, you know, heart-wrenching story. There's just like it's just a hyper focus on her ass and you see every pore and you see the sweat and you see like a fucking little bit of remnants of toilet paper and shit. It's like, ah, man. You see, you see the downward curvature into her lips? Yeah, yeah. She like literally

like, in three in the fucking like, she's like talking about like, oh yeah, you know, my sister needs help and stuff and then she's just spreading her ass cheeks and I'm like, yeah, that was a little inappropriate. It's a little inappropriate, but I mean, it's one. She was spreading her ass cheeks in three? Excuse me?

Yeah, she fucking, she unzipped. Oh, you didn't play, did you? You didn't finish it, did you? I didn't finish three yet. Yeah, you didn't get to the part where she, like, she unzips her jumper in. She's like, Sheppard, I need your help. And then she just spreads her ass cheeks

and he's like, I'm listening. And his eyes are like this fucking big. And then Shepard, and the Shepard dives into it. And it's like that, yeah, it's like that level in gears too, where they all go inside the giant worm. It's like that. Yeah. But it's her fucking vagina.

And then Shepard's just like, Shepard's like, Dom! Dom! Dom! Oh no, Dom's squirting again! Dom squirting again! God fucking damn it. Dom and his fucking wife are in Miranda Lawson's ass. I haven't got to get him out, but Dom, but Marcus can't stop squirting.

It's too slippery. I'm sorry. I hate this fucking character, man. Like, squirting Marcus Phoenix is like a fucking Spector that will not stop haunting this show. It's looking great. I can't stop. I got sent.

I'm drowning. I can't even do that voice right now because my throat is in shambles. That's right. But. But. I forgot you got to find out of fine. Anyway, I don't know. I just, it's not, and by the way, like, I just want to make it clear because apparently

this needs to be, this needs to be made clear for some reason. I don't like the Confederate flag. I'm not a Confederate flag. I don't know if you knew that. Speak for yourself, bro. I didn't... Speak for yourself. I didn't join the South and, you know, I don't have like a The South who will rise again tattoo on my fucking scrotum or anything.

But... Four years strong, baby. I don't know, I just think it's fucking weird. Because I think video games are art and I think it's just weird to censor them for people who just don't exist. Absolutely. I just think it's weird. And to me it's like, and I understand this is exaggerative, but it's like when... Like when they would like like...

chip the fucking genitals off of like the fucking statues and fucking Rome or whatever the fucking it's like why the fuck it's a statue like fucking whatever it's a pee pee oh no it's a small genitals that was the crazy thing I was like yo their dicks are so tiny bro well it was like a small dicks it was it was it was an aesthetic it was an aesthetic and you also need to keep in mind I actually I actually had a conversation with a lady friend of mine a long time ago where she didn't really understand how shriveled a piece can get if it's fucking cold.

Like she didn't understand that. So like seeing like, very much to affect you. Yeah. A cold will fucking make your balls fucking hug against your fucking your body and shrivel your piece altogether. Like if you're genuinely like freezing.

So I'm so I'm going to say these statue motherfuckers are probably standing around not fucking pulling at themselves awkward as fuck. I mean, first of all you're not going to be like But also, also, they also having a giant, because you obviously they could have just, hey, make me as well endowed as possible. They could have done that. So it's, it was a part of the aesthetic.

Kind of like say in the medieval, in the medieval times, dude, women fucking, it was all about that forehead, bro. Like the dudes loved women to have fucking big ass foreheads. That was the thing. Yeah, man. There's aesthetics. That's a true. That's a real true thing. If you read the history of like ancient Greece, you read about like these.

games where they would they would all they would all like come out a woman's face and they would they would like it would be like a little race where they would like see who's come could could reach the eyes first yeah because it was such a big forehead that's that's a real real game i've played that game before that's crazy yeah everybody's everybody's played that uh didn't you read at nantes inferno like that's how it opens up this is this is why i but look i think they smote those of they droops out of small genitals because of the fact that they were all gay and they're like i got the smallest dick i'm gonna hurt you the least when i fuck you and i think that you That is such an insane.

The small genitals. That is my theory. That is a, that has the tiniest dick. I'm the best person. I'm the best person to be your husband to fuck you. Bro. Dude, it's crazy. It's crazy to think that we live in a world where there were soldiers that would fuck each other to create brotherhood.

Success starts with your drive. An American public university is here to fuel it. With affordable tuition and over 200 flexible online. programs, APU helps you gain the skills and confidence to move forward. Whether you're changing careers, starting fresh, or pursuing a lifelong passion, our programs are designed for people who never stop. You bring the fire, APU will fuel the journey. Learn more at APU. APU.orgon.com.com. I've got Dan Morgan here on the pod. Say hi, Dan. Hey, how's it going today? It's going good, man. Tell us who you are and what you do. I'm Dan Morgan. I'm an attorney and a managing partner at Morgan and Morgan, which is America's largest injury law firm.

That's pretty awesome. I think I saw Billboard of years recently that said 20 billion one. 20 billion is an insane number. Yeah, 20 billion recovered. It's actually, I think, somewhere north, probably closer to 22, 23 after this year. And each year we get bigger and badder and our army grows. So the number will hopefully keep getting bigger and bigger as time goes on. Awesome. So how does someone get in contact with you? Morgan and Morgan. What would I do if I got into an accident? Probably the easiest way is dialing pound law. That's pound 529 from your cell phone. We are always open. Our call center is always waiting to take your call. 24-7, 365. Wow. Dan Morgan. From Morgan and Morgan, America's Large Injury Law, from thanks for coming by the show. Thanks for having me. Visit furtherpeople.com for an office near you. What? So, you know, so like. That hasn't gone away, bro. That's not gone away. Definitely true. Do you go to the Middle East and stuff where they're all surreal. out like they're all fucking each other hardcore because they can't fucking because they can't do it it's I mean

why are the why are fucking you know the what is it the celibacy people and like the the voodoo Catholic stuff with the robes and shit and then they're just touching everything they can get their hands on that's like the little holes and shit we're treading on some dangerous eyes well who's gonna because

because we have these like really deeply fucking you know Italian fucking Vatican people listening to us right we do we have the fucking And the Pope's listening to the Star-Chair. I actually... Our non-white Italian fans. Hold on, hold on, hold on.

I was actually going to wait until the end of the episode to announce this. But, like, I received an email from Spotify today. We are the number one podcast in the Vatican. Did you know that? Did you imagine? You have the Pope as a guest on our podcast? Dude. That would be terrifying.

It would be terrifying because I would dig into them and then I'd be assassinated. I would just begin him, bro. I would like, just say nigger twice. No, man. Just say it twice. Say, nigga twice. Okay, first I would be nice. First, I would be nice.

And then I would have to be, I can't, I'm sorry, dude. I can't let, there's too many weird things happening within the clergy, shuffling around deviance and I can't let it slide. I would have to go hard on him. I would have to. Whatever do you mean? And then the Vatican is a sad. And, you know, there's like, I'm not, I, you know,

You guys, I don't need to say anything. Don't say anything. Don't say that. Don't say it. If you say it, it's going to bring, because the Vatican, the Vatican assassins will get us.

Yeah, that's like a, there's people that actually, I was going to show you, um, actually, I think maybe on the, the next inward club,

there is a song. The rapper Vinnie Pass, he's, uh, Gemitrix. Uh, well, it's just,

he's just, he's just rapping as Jim Vinny Pass. His own album. There's a song called End of Days. and it is the most filled conspiracy theory song it's so good that I'm like I want everybody to hear this shit

I'm gonna give you guys a sample where he says he knows about the skeletons on the moon and that Barack Obama was cloned in a test tube that's a bar that's too much that's too much that's a bar there are it's a fucking bar yeah that's too much

that's too much for our audience I think there are skeletons on the moon 100% but like absolutely definitely that's what the fucking dogs and everything are all those dogs they sent to space the Cosmo dogs all the fucking Cosmo dogs

I mean I guess how many dogs we probably sent like millions of dogs into space We've sent chimpanzees Dozens No it's easily been at least 200 million dogs We've sent

We've sent chimps We've sent hamsters we've sent dogs and cats like no no games we've sent those animals up I don't know why the fuck we sent a dog up there and what the fuck is a dog gonna do in space I'm gonna die of starvation it's like that fucking it's it's that animal testing shit again

could you imagine if you sent a dog to space and it gains sentience it being in space made its brain open up because it was so far out of its comfort zone that it was like I understand things now I get it I don't I mean I can't even imagine how that would work but I'm lit You go ahead and when you get yourself a dog

Or you go talk to Lowe I forgot Bose. What if it reanimates Bo? Whoa. He's like, I'm on back. I'm back. Where's Barack?

Is he back as he was or is he back as he is? He's back as he was. Okay. If you're back as you are, then that's not fun. That's not going to be a corpse. Yeah. Yeah.

I don't want zombie bull. He'd be that fucking. He'd be that fucking. I'm a fucking ghost dog from Nightmare before Christmas at this point. He talks exactly like Barack Obama. Oh, man, I can't wait to get home and talk to my owner about bombing Syria some more. Hey, Obama, I'm home. Oh, wow.

Bo, you're back. How are you doing? I missed you. I missed you quite a bit more, Bo. Let's go talk about ruining, what's his name, ruining Bernie Sanders chance and becoming president. Let's go. Let's go talk to the Democratic Party and get that out of here. He did do that.

That is real. That is a very real thing. That's a fact, Democrats. Obama is this smoothest like, do you know, do you know no name? Like she's the rapper? Yeah, I love her. Yeah. So she like says a bunch of shit on Twitter that's like shut the fuck up.

But like one time I was actually like I almost stood up and applauded because Obama went back to fucking right Michigan and you fucking shot a three pointer and stuff. It was during COVID and stuff. And people were all like, oh, yeah. And she fucking went hard in the pain on him about, you know, the poison fucking water and flit and all this shit. And I was just like, thank you for not forgetting, like not letting this fucking war criminal off the hook. Because people keep doing these cool little things. Like, oh, remember I was, I was, Michelle shared a fucking some food with war criminal bush.

And it's so adorable. And I'm like, yeah. Why can't, I'm going to try that. I'm going to kill a bunch of people in Minecraft. And then fucking just like do something really adorable, like pet some puppies and see if people forget about it. It's not the same for you. You're just a random bitch-ass nigger. It's not going to be the same for you.

Yeah. You're not a fucking rich person. You're just some black guys going to go fucking kill people and end up shot in dead. You're not O.J. Simpson who like, we will like set up an iPhone on a weird tripod, drive up to it in a golf cart, and then pulled up a picture of him and Michael Jackson being like, I knew Michael Jackson. and then drive away and everybody's like, oh, OJ. There is something lovable about OJ Simpson, though.

You got to be real. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. I don't exactly. I don't forgive him. But you're an O.J. There's things about him. I'm not a sympathizer.

I'm just, I'm an understand the situation. You're literally a Simpson, Simp. You're an OJ Simpson. You're an OJ Simpson. You're a Simpson. I just think everything about that.

that time is so magic. It's just so like, he, this is, by the way, this is the ninth time you've gone off on this tangent in the last, I'm sorry,

but he's pretty much if Aragon in the very beginning of Lord of Rings went against Sarah. Like no prep, no nothing, and then he won somehow. You talk about OJ Simpson, like a child talks,

like a seven-year-old talks about Spider-Man when he meets him at Disney World. Exactly. It is the strangest. I can't believe this. I can't believe this is true. I mean, I can't believe it either. I will be honest, but it's more of a like, I just wish he had humility.

You know, he's like, holy fuck, I can't believe I got away with it. I'm going to just lay low for life. And he's like, you know what? I'm going to get on Twitter and you're all going to hear my takes about just everyday life. And I'm going to be in your fucking face as much as possible. He goes to celebrity parties and shit, bro. He goes to like parties or like celebs are like brub and shows. Those people like the heat is he hasn't been exempted from like white society.

They still let him hang out with that. And it's like he's the juice man. Like he was just. He's the slayer. He's the slayer. He's the gun fucking like he just like people it's pretty fucked up. Yeah. Like you can be.

I mean, look at look at. People make a good point about Michael Jackson right because it's there's the whole allegations whatever, blah, blah, blah. But it's just like if there were that many allegations about any of us doesn't matter if we did it or not. Yeah. Yeah. you're completely done.

But then Michael Jackson like, oh, dude, but have you heard thriller? And that's all it takes. Like, Thriller, and he's... And I'm one of those people,

bro. And it's sad to say, like, you can't tell me you rock my world ain't a fucking slapping song, bro. It's like,

it's... It really does make it all. It really does make it all okay. It makes it... It really does soften the blow, you know? So if Hitler put out like some of the dopest music,

then what? I mean like if like if we dug through we dug through Hitler's like we found a bunker and we dug through his shit he was a sound cloud rapper he's he has like like like like he had ideas about sound cloud before SoundCloud came out he's like one day they're gonna be Wednesday that's going to be streaming services. Yeah. Yeah. He has an EP. What if Hitler invented hip hop dude. That is tell me that would hurt me. That would hurt me more than you guys to understand. What the fuck are we talking about? Hitler was like the person, like he was in, like after he gasped a bunch of Jews, like right afterwards. Oh my God. He went in his office and he was like he put on some headphones. He was like, can you imagine?

I think he's 16. Hold on, hold on, hold on. Can you imagine Hitler doing this? Like, can you really imagine that? Like, I, that is so fucking alien to me that I cannot even, I can't even Photoshop that in my head. Could you imagine? done my sign eyes is up. Turn my sign eyes is up.

Turn them up. Did you imagine the verse, the first verse from shook ones by infamous mob deep was actually written by Adolf Hitler. That would be something, I would have to leave the country. You know what, though? For real?

You know what though? For real? Celebrities do kind of get a pass for killing people. Like, it's kind of like, like Matthew Broderick and like Caitlin Jenner. and like...

There's definitely more. There's definitely more. Mark Wahlberg almost. Yeah. Mark Wahlberg. Mark Wahlberg just straight up beat a Vietnamese man's eyes out and he's sully and uncharted.

Like what the fuck? Like it's just like if you're famous you kind of get like even if you don't really do anything of supreme value like Mark Wahlberg like I mean like really like what hey he had Calvin Klein commercial about talking about

to help protect you from AIDS yeah that's true he um very good what movie he made what movie he was in I was good he's in a lot of good shit I'm gonna be like yeah but he's not looking he's never been okay he's not that you're right

he's never like it's not like a Leo decapreo and Wolf of Wall Street you know what I mean the depotted like I loved his part but he could somebody else could have played him oh man what do we where do we go from here. We could, so there's, there's one more thing we could talk about.

It could be a little bit heavy, so I'll give you guys the option not to talk about it. What, the Fauci dog shit? Yeah, I don't know. What happened exactly? People are Are you familiar with this, Derek? Have you been like checking in on this? Yeah, I saw

I only familiar with it because I saw John Tron fucking tweet about it. And I was like, what, get the, like, I was like I see, okay, I was like all right. He pops in the Go ahead. Continue. So, I guess there is something about Dr. Fauci that's come out where he oversaw or he like signed off on like, I don't know what the fuck exactly his relationship is to it, but I guess he's like.

He personally rolled up his sleeves. He personally rolled up his sleeves and fisted a couple dogs and used them as hand puppets. No. But it is fucked up. Like, it is like, like, there's like animal testing that goes on in these labs. and apparently they found out something like they like they would do animal testing on beagles and they would like remove their vocal cords so they couldn't bark because their barking was annoying they had like they would inject them with like success starts with your drive an American public university is here to fuel it with affordable tuition and over 200 flexible online programs APU helps you gain the skills and confidence to move forward. Whether you're changing careers, starting fresh, or pursuing a lifelong passion, our programs are designed for people who never stop. You bring the fire, APU will fuel the journey.

Learn more at APU.apus.edu. I've got Dan Morgan here on the pod. Say hi, Dan. Hey, how's it going today? It's going good, man. Tell us who you are and what you do. I'm Dan Morgan. I'm an attorney and a managing partner at Morgan and Morgan, which is America's largest injury law firm. Awesome. I think I saw Billboard of years recently that said 20 billion one. 20 million is an insane number. Yeah, 20 billion recovered. It's actually, I think, somewhere north, probably closer to 22, 23 after this year. And each year we get bigger and batter and our army grows. So the number will hopefully keep getting bigger and bigger as time goes on. Awesome. So how does someone get in contact with Morgan and Morgan? What would I do if I got into an accident? Probably the easiest way is dialing pound law. That's pound 529 from your 6.5.2.9 from your

cell phone. We are always open. Our call center is always waiting to take your call. 24-7, 365. Wow. Dan Morgan. From Morgan and Morgan, America's Large Injury Law, from, thanks for coming by the show. Thanks for having me. Visit for thepeople.com for an office near you. Parasites or like bugs or something or like some, some flesh-eating thing, some crazy fucking thing. I don't know why animal testing is really fucked up, right? Of course it is. I hate, I hate, uh, this is not really cruel. I, I, when I look at a dog, I, I, I, when I look at a dog, I feel sunshine, you know, like it can be the darkest day on the planet. I could have just lost someone I care about.

But the bark and a wag of a tan, a lick of a dog on my cheek. Except you on my cheek. It just, it makes my day better, you know? It helps me, it helps me endure. But you've got to understand that a lot of things that we have in this world, like scientifically, a lot of the shit we've gotten to is because we use animals. we cannot immediately we cannot immediately test things on people because we could but we can't say no we could but we can't worth more than an animal it is I'm sorry it's look at even if people

volunteer we still can't do inhumane testing on them yeah you know what I mean like we even though we would it would be much more beneficial because there's people that would totally sign up for it give this money to my family whatever but we can't do it so we have to use animals as fucked up as it is the like it's like as of right what's the alternative what the fuck can you do it's it's it we're in such a weird

thing about it we got we have one of the best inventions in the world the microwave from fucking with hamsters yeah simple like it's just like what yeah what was that again it was like we were trying to like cryogenically freeze things and and thought them out right

they successful yeah they successfully even did it too it's just that you know and then they thought like like the waves yeah yeah that's all the you know we got it from there which is awesome, but it's like, yeah, then they thought they could do it to people, but it's like, too fucking, we're too big. But, uh, yeah, but it's,

it's, man, it's, it's a very, it's a very, because like, if you were to say like, hey, they're testing on salamanders, people will just go, you know, like, nobody, nobody, nobody would care. There's dogs. But it's like, oh my God, it's Snoopy. They're testing on Snoopy.

Yeah. That's the problem. It's, it's Toby McGuire from Cass and Dogs. It's like, why do you know all the fucking dog in the animal? movies. What's going on here? What am he is? He is. He's the beagle. He's up. He's Matt. He's Max. No, but like, I don't know. You, you were like, you were like fucking, oh, that's a shaggy dog.

That's the fucking Coke, uh, Allen. You're like, that's the shaggy dog. You were like, um, you're like, have you seen? No, there's, they hate them all. I, they, they all suck. You've never seen. I hate it. Well, I am, I'm an animal voice. I hate those movies. I am an animal movie expert. I've seen every episode of, every episode of of Wishbone. Every episode of 100 Good Deeds for Eddie McDowd. Uh, every single remake of the Shaggy Dog, which by the way is a film trope, which is how often that thing has fucking been made. Are you serious?

Yeah, it's a Shaggy Dog. Like, there are types of movies called Shaggy Dog movies. And I forget what the exact trope is. Wow. It's a man. It's a asshole man. They don't spend time with their family. I know that thing too.

It's really bad. Shaggy dog movie. I'm actually curious. Interesting. So am I, because I didn't, I actually didn't notice. Bapapapapababababababababababababababababab. Shraggy, Shraggy. Oh my God, what the fuck is...

Damn it. I don't know how to search for the... Oh, a Shaggy Dog Story. Its original sense of Shaggy Dog Story or Yarn is an extremely long-winded anecdote characterized by extensive narration of typically irrelevant incidents and terminated by an anti-climax.

So basically, like... The end of the movie is going to be, oh, he's a person again. You know what I mean? Like that's like the fucking shaggy dog You already know what's gonna happen before You fucking watch it Yeah or or just or just like

Or just like the ending is just super anticlimactic Like a lot of Norm MacDonald's jokes are kind of like Shaggy Dog stories because they just like They meander and they just like kind of And they end up and just like really It's just like this fucking stupid punchlines That are fucking wonderful But yeah

Yeah no uh I don't know man like I I understand the visceral reaction To wanting to protect a dog Absolutely But at the same time, I think I'm very cognizant of the fact that a dog is an animal, and it's an animal that we care a lot about because we spend a lot of time around them. We live here. Yeah, we live here where they're loved and cared for as equals sometimes. It's fucking really creepy.

What do you mean really creepy? Like, you have like a dog sitting at the table, and then you go like, look at my son. And it's like, all right, fucking. Oh, yeah, like, oh, I'm my cat mom. It's like, bitch. Like this is my son Straight up make out with their dogs and shit Yeah

I don't like fucking I don't know about I've let my dog lick my face Like I don't mind if my dog looks my face That's not making that's not making out though Your dog's licking your face I'm just like making like People are like fucking tongue action

With their dogs like straight up So fucking discussion All right All right alright alright That's not even respectful to the fucking dog That's the worst That's the worst thing we fucking talk about so far Change your fucking life

Let's calm down It's not bad All right let's calm down Shane Dawson Um, we got to calm down a little bit. Look, all I'm going to say is this, man. Animals lives are, are important, you know, and we shouldn't, we shouldn't be brutal to them, you know. We shouldn't be brutal to them for no right cause, you know, like we kill animals and we eat them.

The vast people eat meat, you know, like you're going to, you're going to bitch about that. Once you start bitching about one thing, it's a, it's a cascading effect and you got to start cleaning up a lot of shit. Yeah, that to me is like the big kind of thing in this argument where like a lot of people who are like complaining about this dog thing As fucked as it is by the way. No one's arguing that it is it fucked they're eating a double bacon cheeseburger Yeah, you're fucking reading that shit. Yeah, exactly. It's just like you're at a certain point Have you seen someone kill a fucking cow sometimes? I've seen it personally. Yeah, that shit is they get big ass logs sometimes And they clout the fucking it's it's it is genuinely fucking upsetting it and like I I I the thing is it's like you can't,

the people complaining about this are really just like looking for like a morally retroactive excuse to not take the vaccine which is like fine. If you don't, if you really want to find an excuse not to take the vaccine, fine. Fair enough. But I think the issue here is that it's so situational and you didn't care

about animal rights before this. I know because I don't really give a shit about animal rights because I eat bacon all the fucking time. I eat pergers all the fucking time. I get myself some ice cream every now and then and I'm totally fucking fine with the horrific situations that they put those animals in. I'm not totally fine. I'm not morally happy about it, but I'm not going to go out and then suddenly like commit to this massive change where the rest of my life is now meatless just because I hate the way they make it.

And if you're going to complain about this, then you've got to, you got to be consistent about it. You know, like it's upsetting what they do to these animals. But I'm like dude Don't go to fucking don't go to Southeast Asia I'm just telling you don't step foot in there Caribbean bro don't go to the fucking Caribbean bro don't go Don't go to a lot of Don't leave American Canada

Don't go out of the Western world Yeah like West you're kind of pretty much on the same thing Can you would you would you would you guys eat a dog? No not knowingly never I would um never never I If I didn't have to know because like say even something that I eat normally like beef. I don't really want to eat the tongue, but I was tricked. And then I was just kind of like,

oh, because my friend was like, oh, I tried these tacos and I had it. And he's like, what is this? A lingua, and I was like, oh, shit. I was like, oh, it was good. But I don't want to do it again. If, he also made me try a stomach and that was disgusting. Yeah, I can imagine that being gross. But can you, like, let's say, you're in like a different country, right?

And they serve you a meal. And it's like, they go like, hey, this is just so you know, this is this is dog meat. Like after I'm done eating or what I'm about to eat it? I'm like, I'd rather not have this. Thank you. Is there anything else like you eat?

I think I'd be like, is this like, like, what's the, what's it like? I'd be like, how's the flavor? What is it? What are you seasoned this with? Are you using this? Are you using an adobe? What are you doing? I couldn't do it.

I always, well, I always bring adobe with me wherever I go. Oh, you're one of those people? Yeah, absolutely. You're like Hillary Clinton in her fucking hot sauce. Yeah. You gotta bring adobe with you, bro. You got to. You don't get it, Derek. You're fucking, you're, yeah, I don't get. No, I can see, yeah, I bring, I bring, I'm just a little simpler. Um, I keep, I bring a live round to every, all I need is, all I need is, all I need is, so much more. Why do you have that in arms reach? I, this is my adobe. God, this shit. I was, that was just fucking joking. Hard in the paint, son. It's so good.

All right. This is all you need. Just a few herbs and some onion, like, it'll make anything taste good. That's true. So, I mean, it's the gratifier, but I couldn't eat a dog. You know, like, I, like, I don't know. Like, I've confined my secrets to my dog. What about a cat? What about a cat? Oh, I, I wouldn't, I don't, I for a different reason.

I wouldn't eat a cat because I don't like cats enough to eat them. Cats just seem like they taste gross. They look like they taste gross. I kind of agree with that. I think, I think, like, cats in general, like, say tiger and lion and all that shit, like, you don't really hear people saying, like, oh, I love that type of meat. Yeah, they don't eat them because, well, one, one, one, editors don't taste good, I'm pretty sure.

I think that's kind of what it is. They don't taste good. Yeah. And then too, like, you know, like. Fucked up. I hear humans taste like, like, like, like, on a sweeter side. That's horrible. Yeah.

That's, yeah. I've heard that multiple times from, uh, from, you know, they'll interview, uh, cultures that obviously shouldn't. Yeah. And then they'll be like, whoa. And I was like, damn, man, they, they still find some of these cultures around. And I guess they got to respect them or, or whatever and leave him alone and I'm like dude that's weird I'm like the guy was talking to one of

the cannibals he was like the guy was like if you don't shut up I'll eat you he said that to the reporter I would have pulled down my gun I would have shot him and I would have gone a car and left you know you know like horror movies don't like really affect me or you guys or anything yeah but one thing that kind of a fucked with me and I might have mentioned this before on the podcast I watched green inferno which is basically about what we're just talking about the crash land and then they, you know, there's cannibal fucking forest people start eating them and shit. And like the first one was just like this heavy set dude. And the screams he was making when they like pulled out his tongue and shit and like fucked with his eyes.

Success starts with your drive. An American public university is here to fuel it. With affordable tuition and over 200 flexible online programs, APU helps you gain the skills and confidence to move forward. Whether you're changing careers, starting fresh, or pursuing a life. lifelong passion. Our programs are designed for people who never stop. You bring the fire, APU will fuel the journey. Learn more at APU. APU. APUS.edu. I've got Dan Morgan here on the pod. Say hi, Dan. Hey, how's it going today? It's going good, man. Tell us who you are and what you do.

I'm Dan Morgan. I'm an attorney and a managing partner at Morgan and Morgan, which is America's largest injury law firm. That's pretty awesome. I think I saw billboard of yours recently. It said 20 billion one. 20 million is an insane number. Yeah, 20 billion recovered. It's actually, I think, somewhere north, probably closer to 22, 23 after this year. And each year we get bigger and badder and our army grows. So the number will hopefully keep getting bigger and bigger as time goes on. Awesome. So how does someone get in contact with Morgan and Morgan? What would I do if I got into an accident? Probably the easiest way is dialing pound law. That's pound 529 from your cell phone. We are always open. Our call center is always waiting to take your call.

47 365. Wow. Dan Morgan. From Morgan and Morgan, America's Large Injury Law, from thanks for coming by the show. Thanks for having me. Visit furtherpeople.com for an office near you.

I was like, I'm pretty sure somebody researched what this would actually sound like because it was such a sound that I'm like, I don't know how you make this sound unless you actually do this to somebody and it's still in my head. I hate thinking about it.

That marked you, bro. It did. It was almost the same way when I first heard that. Remember when every, Everybody was, it was like in 2004, I think. Everybody was circulating around that, that, that, that terrorist sawing the dude's head off, the army dude or whatever. I saw that.

And like, you hear him like groaning and you hear the, the, I, that still, I still hear that. The gargle sound of the blood, man. That sound, that sound will never leave my fucking head. Yeah. It's still hearing. It pisses me off. I'm like, there's, that stupid movie had the same effect, even though it's a,

fucking movie because I'm like dude the sound that he makes it I'm like tell me you've ever heard a purse because it reminded me of like you know the difference between a pig being scared and a pig being slaughtered. There's a very big difference in the yeah it was like that the guy made

a pitch that I was like I didn't like that at all now go watch a dog get hurt and you like you hear that whimper sound and I think like evolutionarily like that sound bothers us as like humans that we hear that sound yes and we're like we have to help it like what's going on or or our friend needs our help yeah it's like a dog whistle yeah yeah in a non-political way

in a non-political way yeah everything's a dog whistle nowadays oh that hat you're wearing it's a it's a dog whistle I don't know for what but yeah I don't know it's leading somebody somewhere yeah whatever whatever fucking green and yellow means I'm sure it's some some Irish nationalist party or some fucking shit. Oh my gosh. I love the nationalist vibe.

It's so late. Some Irish guy walks up to you in the street and he's like, welcome brother. We are, we are coming back. Why does he sound like that? I don't know, because he sounds some shitty part of Ireland.

That's how gay looks talk, right? That's how gay looks talk, right? I mean, you know, in a, you know, in a cartoony way, I guess. Yeah. I don't know how to, I can't do it. I can't do... I can practice.

You know, uh... I flundi any of the video, you know, is that some real Gaelic bullshit? That's real, it's real gaelic. I don't know what it means. I probably like chanted a fucking deity into existence.

But, uh, let's move on to some fucking questions, huh? Let's move on to some... Let's do it. Some questions from our patrons. All the questions. Who support us over at patreon.com slash the snark tank.

Okay, uh, cross-eyed trans girl wrote in. Hey guys. Hope you're all having a lovely day, night, whatever time it is for you. Name something obscure that you really appreciate. Let your inner hipster out. Could be an album, a video game, or a movie, Klanoa for PS2, TV show, whatever. So that's from Cross-Eyed Trans Girl.

Thank you so much for your mom. Cross-eyed trans girl. Mine is easy. What? Swords, bro. I fucking appreciate swords in such a ridiculous degree. I love them. Not really obscure.

I mean, to the degree in which I look at them, it's kind of obscure, you know? How many swords you own? I don't own any swords, I don't own any swords, unfortunately,

because my, my grandmother, I lived on my grandmother. She was like, don't bring a fucking sword in my house. And I live in roommates that play too much. I'm like, I don't want a sword.

I don't want a real sword anywhere near anyone I could get hurt. Yeah, you should not carry. You remember Jalen with his, sword and we lived with Jalen he would just like spin that thing around. He stabbed my laptop. He stabbed my laptop and I was like

I guess it's broken now. I do remember that. He fucking shattered it with a sword. And I was like, what the I forgot that that happened entirely. I was like what? Why did you do that? He was like my bad man. I wasn't even mad at him. I was like dude.

Just chill. That laptop was pretty, bro. That laptop was pretty fucked though. It was pretty fucked but like it was gone now. that's fucking funny I was listening I was like on TikTok the other day

and somebody brought up a pretty good point where it's like swords are pretty cool but like the question was like are swords cool and your answer would be yes typical of course

but are people who own swords cool no typically no typically not typically not every sword person that I follow on YouTube massive nerds and they're balding. Like it's, it's, it's for some reason.

Yeah, that's that's one. And then there's one guy. There's one guy that's not. There's like this young Asian actor who's like a proper like swordsman. And he's cool as shit. He does like back handsprings and he's cool. He's like, oh no,

he's a nerd. Cool. That's definitely a nerd. He's fucking practical Bishito, you know, like no, no pussy getting person is going to do that, you know? Exactly. That's what we're talking.

Like no person that began into getting fucking hip, getting hip lips. is gonna fucking become a samurai, you know? Yeah. But still, like, it's still pretty cool. Like, I think they're really, really nice. Can the chat, can, uh, I keep saying the chat because I streamed a lot in the last few days, can the audience remind me of, because I, I, I, I, there's no way I made this up.

Success starts with your drive. An American public university is here to fuel it. With affordable tuition and over 200 flexible online programs, APU helps you gain the skills and confidence to move forward. Whether you're changing careers, starting fresh, or pursuing a lifelong passion, our programs are designed for people who never stop. You bring the fire, APU will fuel the journey.

Learn more at APU.APUS.edu. I've got Dan Morgan here on the pod. Say hi, Dan. Hey, how's it going today? It's going good, man. Tell us who you are and what you do. I'm Dan Morgan. I'm an attorney and a managing partner

at Morgan and Morgan, which is America's largest injury, law firm. That's pretty awesome. I think I saw billboard of years recently that said 20 billion one. 20 billion is an insane number. Yeah, 20 billion recovered. It's actually, I think, somewhere north, probably closer to 22, 23 after this year. And each year we get bigger and batter and our army grows. So the number will hopefully keep getting bigger and bigger as time goes on. Awesome. So how does someone get in contact with Morgan and Morgan? What would I do if I got into an accident? Probably the easiest way is dialing pound law. That's pound.

529 from your cell phone. We are always open. Our call center is always waiting to take your call. 24-7, 365. Wow. Dan Morgan. From Morgan and Morgan, America's Large Injury Law, from, thanks for coming by the show.

Thanks for having me. Visit forethepeople.com for an office near you. Unless I'm starting the habit of lying to myself about fake shows that exist, which would be like a really counterproductive thing for me to do, but like God knows, it's possible. Pretty bad. There's...

I swear to God I saw this show once. About, or like this, video detailing the life of this dude who was like he walked around with a sword and then he like sailed to an island with his sword to train but he was a fucking nerd so he drowned and died I swear to God this is a real story and I can't I don't it's all coming back to me right now please somebody listening send it to me if this is real I swear to God I didn't make this up it's it sounds vaguely familiar but but it might be some type of Mandela thing.

Yeah, that's the thing. It's like, I'm trying to remember if I've made this up to amuse myself or if this is a real sword guy drowns, maybe? It sounds somewhat, like, familiar, but I don't know, man. I don't know. It's got to be, like, something. Anyway, that's a real thing.

Anyway, he's actually dead, rest in peace. But, you know, something obscure. I don't know. Fuck. I'm trying to think of like anything like media-wise that I think that I consume

that's obscure and I can't I don't know if I can really... I listen to jazz music still you know like people I think the only thing is I think the only thing I can think of is I really I truly believe that it's called different it's a different name depending on where you live but the US version

the American version is the illusion of Gaia on a on the SNES and I think that game I preach the gospel that game and say it is oh you like a link to the past right I'm like it's fucking way better it's way better than that game

in every way imaginable story is fucking great there's like it's like what do you call it when it's like fake history you know it's like because there's like real places you go to like alternate it's alternate history

oh it's like an alternate history thing and then fucking it's just the actually the game play the fight it's so much more intricate and just a smart fucking game charming in every way possible it's the soundtrack fucking awesome everything about this game is so fucking charming

and I'm like guys I need this game to be it's one of those things I always come back to and I feel like a Jehovah's Witness where I want to knock on people's door and be like hey yo you should you should fucking check this shit out you know what I mean

yeah because uh yeah Definitely holds up That's like me with the It's like me with Bloody Roar Bloody Roar 2 Like those like the Bloody Roar games That's not like a popular franchise at all People don't know about Bloody Roar really

Like if you mentioned That's Bloody Roar to like your average Like person who I hate saying gamer Because it's such a shitty fucking term Me too Like

Like your average video game enthusiast Probably does not know what Bloody Roar is Because it's just not It hasn't been relevant for a very long time And it was like, it really, like, exploded on PS1. And that was, even then, it, like, didn't really get too big. But Bloody Roar has, like, so much weight behind it for a 3D fighter, especially back then that, like, is still impressive to me.

Where, like, just the way that you could, like, sway into people and knock them, like, through the ring and, like, they would go, like... And just the sound design was so crisp and, like, very, like... There's something about the sound design of Bloody Roar 2, specifically. That's the one that I remember playing a lot of. Lord War II is a fucking amazing fighting game. Two is such a good game, man. Remember, remember we played it?

Like, when we were moving out of, when we were moving out of the first place in Burbank. Burbank. That was such a good game. In fucking sane. How good that game was. That game's great. Man, I would fucking kickstart for that shit to be like,

A, because I think it was Hudson or some shit. I'd be like, uh, yeah, I'd be like, who somebody, whoever has the rights of this shit, can we like, I will, I will start a thing because I would love to get like even what they're just doing to the definitive edition of the GTA just on that level I would be like could you guys just fucking just smooth it out because it has one of the most inch I'm I'm such a fan of like intricate combos and and not like see mortal combat is they just at a certain point they're just like we're just juggling from now on like pretty much when they got

to mk 11 they're not mk 11 sorry mk9 when they got to the ninth one and they rebooted it it was just all about juggling basic three hit combos and then juggling and then juggling. to get long combos. I like the games like bloody roar where you can do like 20 hits by just linking shit together. You can fucking start off as your human form and then you transform and continue the combo

and then into like your finishing type of whatever your hyper thing, whatever you do. And it's just like I loved taking time to learn that shit. And then like I remember the combos and stuff and like it's burned in my fucking head. Yeah. I love the character.

The character designs in that game too were fucking really cool. Like I love stuff. The fucking mummy mosquito. Yeah. I love that. I was younger. I was always a huge fan of like animals and huge.

Like people had animal powers. Like my first character I played as a modal combat was night wolf. Because I thought night was cool. Like, oh, he turned into a wolf after he wins and he leaves, you know? Or he calls crows down. Like that is always cool to me. I always thought animal, like animal human hybrids were cool. That's why I loved were wolves.

That turned into vampires were like cool as shit, you know? And then like I'd, like my teens and I was like oh, furries stole this. They just completely bogarded this market and now if I think if I ever admit that anthropomorphic humans

are cool, I want to fuck one and I'm a deviant and I'm just like I you guys are monsters. If Bloody War came back, the furry community would have a Renaissance, bro. Yeah. I think you know you guys were fucking, I think it'd be worth it. Wait. Oh, you think it would be worth it. I think it would be worth it. I think it would be worth it. I think Bluroy is that good.

that I would tolerate furries championing it as like, like, hey, look at our fucking game. It would be like, whatever, man, if it's Bloody Roar and it's as good as Bloody Roar 2 was, which chances are being realistic, probably won't be. But it could be. It could be. But, like, I mean, Bloody Roar after 2

was never really as good as 2, like ever. I look the third one was good, but it got back after. But by the way. It was all right. It also nerfed the blood so much. Yeah, it was barely bloody anymore. but it's called bloody roar guess who owns bloody roar who like that's off no Konami so you're never seeing that shit oh that's the worst that literally couldn't be the worst thing

wow it really couldn't it really could not be worse it really like be the hands of someone that would like it's like it's like it's better off it being lost like the fucking deep sea scroll or something like that it's just never getting made now like no one knows who owns it somehow like all the people who's got it's like do you own this it's like nobody knows who it's just like it's just publicly owned

do we want to risk it making it and getting sued or you want to like you want to just not do it and they're just like ah let's just not do it I don't want to get sued I wonder if Tetris is publicly owned it must be right by now it might be because like nobody I don't even remember who like, I can't even think of like a starting screen saying like who made it or anything. It's just a guy.

The Tetris was made by just some random dude in the Soviet Union. Like some fucking Russian. Yeah. Some Russian guy. I was obviously Russian as fuck. Yeah. Like I just did this. Tetris is Russian as fuck?

I don't know if it is or not. Absolutely. Dude, the music is fucking like super czar shit. Yeah, it's super czar shit. Also like if you look at the original game boy. the original cartridge for Tetris, it is just stereotypical Russian buildings, like, strewn all over the place. Because you know, the, the original song. And then there's like the B side song, which is this the most Russian thing ever.

Like, so. Because that's the, that's the, that's the, that's the, that's the default. And then there's a fucking like straight up like, if you're to. put like say the I think B version I forgot I don't know the words that you would put I'm I'm trying to think on the fly but if you put like the second tracker I don't know what you would say to look it up so didn't you can uh let me see chat tris it's B side second yeah I say I said B side of first uh music two popped up yeah music two or song B or something they didn't give a shit by the way I was wrong I guess that like it's the

start screen that I'm thinking of because the cover is literally just fucking, it's literally just Tetris. I'm looking through my Game Boy games. From Russia with fun. It's very Russian. I have the Empire Strikes Back for fucking Game Boy.

The fuck. I can imagine how shit that game. It's really garbage. I remember playing it. I remember playing it. A very distinct memory of playing Empire Strikes Back for the fucking Game Boy in a car

like driving to like a hotel in Arizona. I was like a child in the backseat. And it was nighttime and I had to use the fucking, uh, the little squiggly lamp light thing just to see. Oh my God. Because that was before back lights. I, that light was so fucking ass, dude. It sucked so much.

Because it was just all you saw was the light reflected in the screen. So you had to like, yeah, yeah, it wasn't even helpful. I was like, I don't even want this. It was the dumbest fucking shit. But it did work, kind of, you know, we tolerated it. I can't believe it took to Game Boy Advance the SP version to finally put the back light. Dude, even phones didn't have it back then. It's crazy.

It's because when you, they would build like say a radio and a car and then you can have that light within your system like that's lighting up your dashboard and other things. And I'm like, well, how do you can, I know you guys know how to do this. What's happening? But they can't, but that's connected to like a giant car. They have a lot of room for that. Well, I don't know how much it, uh, I mean, whatever. You never seen how small a backlight is in a game boy, a game boy comp SP?

because I've broken SPs and I saw it in the backlight's like a little thing. I understand that it's a little thing. I understand that it's a little thing, but there must be a reason why they did. It's not like they had that technology and we're just like, eh, we're not going to do it. Like there's no reason why they would just stop or like not do it. Because even every single electronic back then just didn't have it. Cell phones didn't have it at the time.

They had like a lot of cell phones had like the green original Game Boy like background. And I remember when video now came out. And they didn't even have backlight and they were in fucking black and white. So it's like insane. Like it was probably around that time where Game Boy Advance SP came out where like that just became like an affordable thing. Because that's when I remember starting to see them more often. Because that's when the video now color came out and the ad had a backlight and something happened around 2003, 2002. That like revolutionized backlight technology or something.

This should have a light inside of it. Because I remember, I think they were like, oh, kids aren't going to play video games at nighttime. No one wants to do that. And they didn't put it in there. I'm just like, it's like 8 a.m. It's like 8 p.m. My grandma put me to bed. Like, I want to play some video games for I got to go to sleep.

Wow, bro. So Tetris is owned by Tetris Holding LLC. Success starts with your drive. An American Public University is here to fuel it. With affordable tuition and over 200. flexible online programs, APU helps you gain the skills and confidence to move forward. Whether you're changing careers, starting fresh, or pursuing a lifelong passion, our programs are designed for people who never stop.

You bring the fire, APU will fuel the journey. Learn more at APU.apus.edu. I've got Dan Morgan here on the pod. Say hi, Dan. Hey, how's it going today? It's going good, man. Tell us who you are and what you do. I'm Dan Morgan.

I'm an attorney and a managing partner at Morgan and Morgan, which is America's largest injury law firm. That's pretty awesome. I think I saw Billboard of years recently that said 20 billion one. 20 million is an insane number. Yeah, 20 billion recovered. It's actually, I think, somewhere north, probably closer to 22, 23 after this year. And each year we get bigger and badder and our army grows. So the number will hopefully keep getting bigger and bigger as time goes on.

Awesome. So how does someone get in contact with Morgan and Morgan? What would I do if I got into an accident? Probably the easiest way is dialing pound law. That's pound 529 from your cell phone. We are always open. Our call center is always waiting to take your call. 24-7, 365.

Wow. Dan Morgan. From Morgan and Morgan, America's Large Injury Law, from, thanks for coming by the show. Thanks for having me. Visit furtherpeople.com for an office near you. Oh, wow. It's based in Nevada and is owned by Hank Rogers,

Alexi. Of course. Pejitnov, who's the guy who originally made it, and Blue Planet Software, whatever the fuck that is. The company is the exclusive licensee of Tetris holding, the company that owns Tetris World. So they own the IP and they license it off to other developers. So I guess that guy's making money, thank God.

Because I was thinking, too, because that's like, man, imagine you build one of the most perfect video games ever made, right? And you're a fucking Soviet. so you can't own it. That fucking sucks. You gotta leave. You gotta leave that place. I gotta go.

I gotta get out of here for a little bit. I wonder if it says. I would say Tetris Effect is one of the best games I played in a long time. Like I love, I got addicted to that game for a little bit. Tetris Effect is great. I was playing it like for hours a day. Like I might play that when I'm done,

when I'm done like talking to you guys. Tetris isn't just a really good time, man. I love Tetris. I'm gonna torture myself and play Codor. Oh, man. on PC? Yeah I just like it's

It's uh I mean I already I started I started I well I did a lot of It I put like about An hour or so a little more than an hour Just to prime it for PC And it's still barely okay Yeah

I did like I had to download okay I got some cracked launcher Fucking download all these mods and all this shit To just soup it up and make it like at least functional For a and and and windowed in all, just so much stupid shit that's not in the game. It's so fucking stupid. The game is not built.

Like, it plays better on console, but like, oh, way better. When I played it on a, it's not better either. You know, that shit was like, at least fucking I had a, I jumped into the game and it worked properly, no problems. Like. At least save. I couldn't save. I couldn't save on freaking what you go on on computer.

I would try to save a pickup. And I'm like, well, fuck this. I had a problem. him where so I got killed by the Rancor right the first one the encounter but my character wouldn't die he would pop right back up and then

die again and then prop I was like what's happening the cool thing was because I wasn't I would I just want to see if I can kill the Rancor I knew I couldn't because I didn't have enough shit but then I remember I'm like wait I might have enough grenades and since I wouldn't properly die I would stand right back up and throw a grenade

and then die again but then I had to like reload it anyway so it didn't matter because it's just it I should I don't know why I didn't screenshot that shit I didn't record it because it was it was wild dude you know that there's a fight party after we got fight some giant like giant alien like in a sewer area like right before right after you meet um right after you save the wookie yeah that's the rancor yeah is it the rancor I beat it and I cheated by beating because I kept I put minds all over the floor so I So it would step into a mind, get confused, walk into another mind, blow up, get confused by the other one, and I beat it. And I leveled up like four times and I was way too high level for the game.

And it was like, nice. I was going to go through this, rape at everybody's face. Oh, dude, I'm going to, I'm just going to max out everything next time I play. And I'm going to be like just one. I'm just going to swipe at people and kill everyone. So it's going to be good. game. It's a masterpiece. It's just very old. It's very old.

I can't wait to try out the remaster, dude. That's going to be fucking awesome. All right. We got to do more questions, bro. Yeah, yeah, yeah. We keep spending way too much time on one goddamn question. Texas Tater, Texas Tater Salad and he says, howdy, whack,

Wacker, and Wackist. In the age of the Baby Shield pod from Death Stranding and the Yoten toaster from Destiny, what is the strangest piece of video game merchandise you all have seen? Bonus point. is official. The fucking...

The first thing I came to mind was that fucking chainsaw controller for Resident Evil 4. He doesn't remember that thing? That was like it was shaped like a controller. If you Google it, you'll find it.

It is the weirdest fucking thing. It's like the worst thing to pot... You could possibly play that game with, but... There's like a human, there's like a human-looking PS2 controller, I think,

or... Oh, like made of flesh? It's not made of flesh, but it looks like it's made of flesh. That's what I mean. Obviously, it's not made of... Really... Then why did you say made of flesh?

It says it looks like it's... made, why would you say made of flesh? Because that's what you're talking about. You're talking about the controller that looks like it's made of flesh. Yes, but you said made of flesh. It's like no, it's not made of flesh. It looks like it is. There's probably one that's made of flesh, but you know, on a dark web. Yeah, probably.

Virgin skin. Yeah, I remember, I remember seeing this fucking thing. Disgusting. It's disgusting. This thing's so stupid. What is wrong? What's wrong with, uh, what's wrong with Nintendo? What do you mean? I'm looking at, I'm looking at, uh, there's, uh, this chainsaw.

There's, there's like a lot of chainsaw stuff, and I'm looking at a, uh, GameCube, like, Resident Evil 4. Oh, weird. Yeah. Yeah, I don't know. That's the only one that comes to mind. Yeah, I put in chainsaw, yeah, I put in chainsaw, it pulled up a few different things. And sorry, I kind of like, I was having kind of a thing.

And then, yeah, in my head. And I just, I'm like, what's wrong with Nintendo? Oh, that fucking GameCube controller that had a keyboard in the middle of it? You remember that? Yeah, that one was ridiculous. It's just a straight up keyboard, but it was like the size of a computer keyboard, like, proper. That you could write documents effectively on it. What is that useful for?

I'm looking at the, I'm looking at the fucking chainsaw PS2 controller, and it's like, how the fuck do you use that? I don't know, man. Chainsaw controller Resident Evil 4. Was it the PS2? I thought it was the GameCube. Oh, there's a katana controller for the PS2. Oh my God, it's such a dumb-looking fucking thing. I can't believe they thought that would be

like a good idea. Do you even use a chainsaw in Resident Evil 4? I don't remember. No, just the guy with the head can just cut your fucking head off. Yeah, it's just an enemy with one. So like the fuck. You know what's funny? I love the emaciated black guy from Resident Evil 5. He's a

fucking God. He's so amaciated. Like that is the most impacted African man ever. And he's just swinging around the chains on. It's like, bro, just get down, lie down. I feel like it's like disrespectful that they chose the most emaciated dude to be one of the stronger fucking enemies in the game. Like, you know, one of the stronger. Like, he's like a brute essentially where you're like, fun.

It's hard to take down. But he's such a fucking, like, Chris should be able to explode his face by slapping him. Chris, he's so thin. What is it? What is his thing? Do you guys remember his name? Chainsaw Man, Reson Evil 5. Chainsaw man.

He's so thin. He's so thin. It's crazy. Let me see. I didn't play. I did play Resonimo 5. You want to get him. Oh, yeah.

I do remember him. He's not that thin. Bro, he's thin, Chris. He's tiny. Compared to Chris and Chevra, he's a thin. I mean, I guess compared to Chris and Cheva, yeah. But he's not, I don't know. I've seen thinner people.

Sure, but I mean, he does have some muscles on him. He has muscles like any living thing has muscles on him. But he does not have muscle mass. He has muscles. But like look at the guy on four. He has like fucking a gut. Like this dude eats well. Yeah.

And then they're like, let's make him the complete opposite. Listen. Like I feel like he should be so much bigger because of how much ammo it takes to kill these fucks. And then I like how he dies. He just like hold the chains on defaults to his knees. And then he gets back up and he starts fucking walling out and he shoot him a few more times When he starts going nuts when you for And he starts tripping out and you're like that's why man I just going on

I love the fucking magnums bro like the custom magnums you just blow everything up oh my god Westers magnum and you shoot somebody and they just fall it is a meal before you and I'm like yeah bitch that's what they're bat in your room no it's fucking crazy thunder really damn bro imagine that they came in through your window fucking just came straight in through your window didn't hate you dude that'd be crazy

to the house I'd be like bro Chris is gone man wouldn't it be crazy if like thunder like came into my room and like it burst through my window and started jerking me off and maybe come on camera wouldn't that be crazy I mean we'd have to leave it in the

we'd have to leave in the show I mean that's yeah I mean it's kind of content you know but you guys wouldn't believe this you gotta see it I have to show you this because if I don't show you this, I'm insane. And I just hallucinated something really wild. Let's see, let's see.

Another question. God Emperor Sweeney, hello, mistakes of technology, was wondering, what was the biggest waste of money you spent on an object or thing? Mine was that I was 11 or N12. I bought over $600 worth of porn on Xfinity. And since I didn't know what masturbation was yet, I just stood there every Sunday morning at 6 a.m. Just staring at the TV in confusion. This happened twice. I don't even, how do, I don't even.

Imagine buying porn before you understand what masturbation is. And you're just confused. You're like, this TV, this show costs something. I must watch. I guess I got to watch it. And you just watch it, you know. confused how that even happens. Yeah, that is, that's pretty

fucking wild. That's pretty, I mean, it's, it's definitely true because that shit's, that's fucking crazy. Like, imagine just standing there and staring at this and not quite getting it and you just, yeah, I understood, I mean, I understood parts of it, but then I understood, I remember

stealing my uncle's porn, because every uncle has porn for whatever reason. I feel like, you know, I'm a type of person, I'm like, I don't fucking need a stash porn, and that's stupid. But then as soon as I become an uncle, I'm like, just have this impulse to like start buying porn and stashing it. Just what happens. It is what happens.

When you become blind, you become an amazing musician. It just happens. It's synonymous. And, uh, but yeah. So I stole his, uh, stuff. And I remember it was called Starbanger. It was this gang bang. And before I really understood, I understood like sex kind of.

Kind of. But then like, you know, at the end, they're just fucking finishing all over. And I'm like, what the fuck? They're peeing all over. And like, it's totally. Obviously, pee and come looks completely not even the same, but my dumbass brain couldn't comprehend and come. Yeah. You're just like only one thing has come out of this before and it's this.

So it must be that. You're just thinking like, man, these guys must pee really weird. Ew, their pee looks like marshmallows. That's gross. Hey, he is. I don't know what I don't remember. I don't have had in my life. I don't know, my ex-girlfriend, that bitch.

I don't know. Hey-oh. I don't know. What if I bought that? Oh, my God. So I begged. So Soldier Boy came out and you just came out. And it was a shoe called Baby Nates, right?

They're really expensive, like fucking before the Supreme Hype beast shit. That was like the very beginning of it. And I was like, Grandma, please get me this shoes for my birthday. And she was like, these shoes cost like, $500, Kingston. I'm not buying it. I'm a plea. Give me these shoes.

I want to ask for anything else for the rest of the year. I won't even ask you anything for Christmas. She got me the shoes. Within two months, I could not fit in the shoes anymore. And they were just a waste. They're probably still in my house in New York. Oh, my God.

Within six months, I couldn't fit in them anymore. Because when you're like, when you just start like middle school, that's the phase when you just grow weirdly. So my feet grew from like size like, I guess. Seven to, Sorry.

It went from like size 7 to like size 9 in like fucking like three weeks. And I tried to put them on and I couldn't. And my grandmother was like, I'm still not getting you shit for Christmas. And I just felt like the dumbest little monkey ever, man. Oh my fucking dad. Yeah, I don't know, man. It's hard for me to remember. But like I remember once I think it was like in 2006.

We had just moved to upstate New York away from Yonkers. Everybody had like some kind of iPod. Everybody had like the iPod shuffle, the iPod Nano. They had some way to listen to music. I was still carrying my fucking CD player. And I was like, God, Mom, I want an MP3 player. And they were like, your CD player is fine. You have so many CDs.

What's the problem? I was like I feel stupid and poor I want an mp3 player and then we went to the we went to the mall like we went to Walmart or something and I think they were there and I was like I want this one but it wasn't an iPod that I wanted I just wanted something worse than an iPod but more expensive for some fucking reason and like because I thought it was just like a little bit cooler because for some reason I thought like oh it's not what anybody else has I think it's cool and they were like Chris this is a bad investment it's not an iPod it looks like shit it's so big it's a brick i still have it if i if i can find it i'll take a picture of it and give it to kyle for the episode it's thick as hell it's like this thick it's like a sponge they were gonna get you an ipod i wanted the more expensive it had video capability was it a zoom it was a zen it was a zen media player i know what those are holy

it was a zen media player they're gonna buy you an ipod they were like well buy you an ipod why do you want this and you're like I want this one exactly well because the well so what it was it was like the iPod video the video iPod was way expensive and so it wasn't more expensive than the video iPod but it was more expensive than a normal MP3 player and they were like why do you need video to it's they didn't understand why I would need video for my music and it was just like in retrospect you're probably right but so I spent $500 or like 400 some stupid amount of money for this Zen Media player and then

I tried to update it on my computer and it fucking the screen went dark and I couldn't use it anymore I had to feel around for like the sounds of it and I had to like uh uh so the screen part of my video player didn't work and I lost the receipt like a fucking chimp because I didn't think about receipts

I looked at like oh receipts why do these matter who fucking cares paper I got the thing ready like yeah like I didn't I never saved receipts as a kid why the fuck would you do that it's a piece of paper that tells me I got the thing already fuck this Success starts with your drive, and American Public University is here to fuel it. With affordable tuition and over 200 flexible online programs, APU helps you gain the skills and confidence to move forward. Whether you're changing careers, starting fresh, or pursuing a lifelong passion, our programs are designed for people who never stop.

You bring the fire, APU will fuel the journey. Learn more at APU.APUS.edu. I've got Dan Morgan here on the pod. Say hi, Dan. Hey, how's it going today? It's going good, man. Tell us who you are and what you do. I'm Dan Morgan. I'm an attorney and a managing partner at Morgan and Morgan, which is America's largest injury law firm. That's pretty awesome. I think I saw Billboard of yours recently that said 20 billion one. 20 billion is an insane number.

Yeah, 20 billion recovered. It's actually, I think, somewhere north, probably closer to 22, 23 after this year. And each year we get bigger and badder and our army grows. So the number will hopefully keep getting bigger and bigger as time goes on. Awesome. So how does someone get in contact with Morgan and Morgan? What would I do if I got into an accident? Probably the easiest way is dialing pound law. That's pound 529 from your cell phone.

We are always open. Our call center is always waiting to take your call. 24-7, 365. Wow. Dan Morgan. From Morgan and Morgan, America's Large Injury Lawfirm, thanks for coming by the show. Thanks for having me.

Visit for thepeople.com for an office near you. But yeah, and that was, that was pretty sad. Stupid, it was stupid. It was, I was, it was 2006. I was fucking stupid lull. You know what's crazy? Video. I never had an eye.

I didn't have an eye anything until I graduated high school. I had my first job. I don't have an eye anything. I don't have an iPhone, iPod touch or nothing. I had an MP3 player that I took from my dad because my dad, NPD3. And I was like, oh, that's crazy. I'm taking this. And I went and I took it home.

And he called me, said, Kingston, do you have my MPD pay? And I was like, nah, pops. I don't hung up the phone on them Finish the Kelly Rowland Little Wayne fucking collaboration right afterwards Yeah I didn't I didn't own an iPod anything Until after college

Or I think like in college I got like an iPhone 4S or something That was like the first That was like the first iPhone I got I had a droid before that though Old shit Yeah I got the ones that were like

It was insane It was like 30 gigs for 300 bucks like just uh it was a it was a smoother ipod it was black it was but it wasn't any of that fancier shit it didn't have any other capabilities other than it's listening to fucking music but i remember spending 300 dollars on an ipod for 30 gigs and you know i think about that shit all the time i'm like i can't believe how much shit cost for like 30 gigs like think about what 30 gigs is now yeah it's like fuck man can't believe those hunt i still have an external hard drive that i got in 2004 40 gigs, that shit was fat, bro.

That was expensive at that, fucking hard drive. Yes, it was. Seeing microXDs have like nearly a terabyte and you're like, what's, like, I have a micro SD card that's 512, I think. And that was, that was expensive as shit. But I was like, I have that. I'm like, yeah, it's fucking crazy. I used to be like two gigs.

It's been two gigs and I used to have like, fucking like 110 songs in it. And I was like, oh man, this is the best thing ever. And now it's just like, what? Dude, I felt like a fucking wizard work. My CD player, I had a CD player that was MP3 had capabilities where I felt like a god because before you used to be able to just burn a disc, right? You burn a CD. You either make a mix or you can put like on average two albums on it or something.

Usually roughly like 20 songs or something. And then so my disc, I was able to put MP3s on it. And then that was my mind exploded because I'm carrying fucking a CD player that had about a hundred or so songs on it and then fucking it also said the name of it in tune and I'm like yeah yeah like a fucking stud dude I'm like showing people like do check this shit out it's the fucking future

and then like a few seconds later like the iPod just the iPod just exploded and I'm like okay I don't I don't have that kind of money what the fuck I didn't have that you were if you didn't have when you were fucking poor and dumb and gay and I laugh it really was like

and I was like I really want when my grandmother was like I'm never buying one of these and I was just like please please I begged for an iPhone until I finished high school and she was like you have a job now get one and I was like I guess yeah that's so fucking funny like I remember

some I remember you just brought back like a very vivid memory of me like listening to my CD player and a kid going what is that gay shit to me on the fucking school bus and I was like bro I'm just I'm just I'm eight.

I'm eight, man. I'm just trying to listen to fucking... I think back then I was... I didn't even understand how to get music. So I was like, probably like... I think I put PS1 discs in my... In my CD player. Yeah, because you could do that.

You could put a PS1 game into a CD player and just play it like an album. Yeah, and play it. And so that's what I would do. I would be like a psychopath listening to fucking Silent Hill on the way to school. What kind of scary little motherfucker

That's the scariest shit ever. If you take a kid's fucking iPod, he's listening to the fucking Doom soundtrack, but only the sounds of enemies getting killed. It's no music. And it's like, what are you doing? He's wearing a fucking trench coat,

but he's like six. Yeah, it's, yeah, it wasn't Silent Hill. It was one of the, Tony Hawk, I think,

because it had all the, had all like the offspring and bad religion on it. And I was like, this is cool, I think. I like this, maybe. and then people were like, what's that gay shit?

And I was like, what? I can't hear you over my fucking... You were those garbage headphones, too, that came with... The fuzzy ones? The fuzzy ones? That would like... And they would like... And they would like come apart.

Yeah, like those. Like those. Yeah, so these are a remake retro. These are like these retro fucking wireless. Because I'm fucking, I'm old as shit. So I was like, dude, I missed this stuff. Oh my God, I hated those, dude. It's so crazy. I have AirPods now.

I have, um, these are my regular headphones. I have used these like these, not because I broke my headset, but like using AirPods and remembering there was a time where I would just have these like stupid ass, the weird ass headphones that felt so painful in my ears. They were just reddish up circles. And I was like, I can't believe I used these for so long. Yo, it's especially bad with glasses because maybe you know this too, Derek.

But like when you wear headphones for a long time and you got like glasses, it's like it like pushes your ear against the fucking. handle and it just like after a while you're it feels like you've been punched in the head like by like a really weak man you know like it's just like fuck hours for hours but yeah no that shit was uh it's a very classic type let's do uh let's do two more let's see if we can do so you can do two more all right right right right nostalgia wrote in he says hello father figures i never had that's dangerous definitely do not see I'm a terrible father figure,

I will, I will abandon you for sure. Easy, my niecey. Used to dribble down in VA, my friend. It has now been eight years since the last Splintycell game was released. I stand by my opinion that Chaos Theory is one of the best stealth games

ever made, and Blacklist wasn't too bad either. But over the years, Ubisoft has drastically changed the way they make games to more of a live service formula, which makes every game they turn into, make turn into an open world buggy cluster fuck. My question is would you even trust them to make a classic splinter cell

game? Do you think they will inevitably fuck it up? So I only bring this up because it was recently announced that they green lit a new splinter cell game. That's like a 100% fact. That's 100% fact. That's crazy. Well it's a rumor by like very reputable people who have never been wrong before.

So I don't think they would I don't think they're going to stake their credibility on fucking splinter cell of all things. So I think it is real. I don't know, man I definitely don't want I don't trust them to make it good They can probably do it

I don't trust them to do it man I don't know if you guys have been following Ubisoft lately but they've been fucking up entirely Like they came out with this like weird Free to Play Call Duty clone Called like X Defiant or something And it's like it's like XD

affiant Oh very cool I swear to God it's real And then they had this like Ghost Recon Battle Real that they announced and everybody was like, the fuck is this? And then they pulled it. I heard about the Ghost Recon Battle Royale actually, and it never came out.

Ghost Recon Frontline or something. And they were like, look at this new Battle Royale in the Ghost Recon series. And everybody was like, this sucks. We don't want this. And then they were like... You're stupid. You're stupid. You're dumb and gay and stupid.

You're dumb and gay. Both. Both are not inherently negative necessarily. But I'm just letting you know that you are both of those things, objectively speaking. And your context, like for you, those are both bad because you're dumb and gay. Yeah, yeah. But being dumb and gay aren't exactly bad. No, no, no.

Being gay specifically is not bad, but like you, but I need you to know that you are gay. Not that gay is a bad thing, but you are fucking gay. You're gay. So just so you know. I love gay people though. Like, I have no problem with them. Yeah, there's anything wrong with that. Anyway.

Anyway. Anyway. Anyway, yeah. are gay and bad. Anyway, fucking, yeah, and they announced the beta for this game, and like, three days after they announced it, they were like, we've decided to indefinitely delay our beta for Battlefield Frontline. We hope you understand.

And it's like, yo, they announced it and pulled it three days apart. That is the fastest that's ever happened, I think, in video game history, I think. So. Smart. No, I'm not trusted. Just don't put out shit people don't. Just don't put out shit people don't. Yeah.

I mean, look it, man. Like, what do you think they're going to do with it? Do you think they're just going to fucking change it up like? Like, I think the only thing that they've like, what have they, what have they, what have they done that's been like such an insanely massive disappointment to you? Well, I think it's just the way that they've handled their franchises over the last, like, a couple years. Like, I know Assassin's Creed is in a weird spot where, like, a lot of people actually. like the new direction of Assassin's Creed. I never really cared for it, so it's not really like something that's on my radar. But Tom Clancy IP specifically, like Ghost Recon and Splinter

Cell. Those are series that they have like consistently like fucked entirely. Like they've abandoned Splinter Cell for like eight years. They didn't do anything with it. And then they keep teasing Sam Fisher. They brought Sam Fisher into fucking some one of their ghost recon games as like a, as like a seasonal event or whatever. And it was like this weird thing. It's like why are you here? And then they put him in like this weird mobile game. And I was like, what the fuck are you doing?

I heard about that too. They put him in some mobile like battle, like not a battle at Yale, but like... It was like a MOBA. It was like a tactics game featuring like Ubisoft characters. So it was just like a bunch of Tom Clancy

generic military men and Sam Fisher from Splinter Sound. It was like, what the fuck are you doing? And like, I don't know. I just think they've kind of missed the plot over the last few years. And I don't think they understand what the fuck they're doing. Success. starts with your drive, and American Public University is here to fuel it. With affordable

tuition and over 200 flexible online programs, APU helps you gain the skills and confidence to move forward. Whether you're changing careers, starting fresh, or pursuing a lifelong passion, our programs are designed for people who never stop. You bring the fire, APU will fuel the journey. Learn more at APU.APUS.edu. you. I've got Dan Morgan here on the pod. Say hi, Dan. Hey, how's it going today? It's going good, man. Tell us who you are and what you do. I'm Dan Morgan. I'm an attorney and a managing partner at Morgan and Morgan, which is America's largest injury law firm. That's pretty awesome. Um, I think I saw billboard of years recently that said 20 billion one. 20 million is an insane number. Yeah, 20 billion recovered.

It's actually, I think, somewhere north, probably closer to 22, 23 after this year. And each year we get bigger and badder and our army grows. So the number will hopefully keep getting bigger and bigger as time goes on. Awesome. So how does someone get in contact with Morgan and Morgan? What would I do if I got into an accident? Probably the easiest way is dialing pound law. That's pound 529 from your cell phone. We are always open. Our call center is always waiting to take your call. 24-7, 365. Wow. Dan Morgan. From Morgan and Morgan, America's Large Injury Lawfram, thanks for coming by the show. Thanks for having me. Visit furtherpeople.com for an office near you. I don't know if you looked at this ex-defined gameplay,

but it's like, it just looks like call duty, but free to play, and it's just like, the fuck, why? XD? Really?

Like, I don't know. Like, it's just, it seems like poorly managed, I think, and I just don't know if they have it in them to make, like, a classic stealth game again, without, like,

throwing a bunch of monetizable, fucking things in there. We don't have to spend too much time on this. I just wanted to address it because it was a question that somebody had, and it's actually relevant because it's in the news. But, uh,

let's, see, Crisly Bear, it's a very video game-centric episode. A lot of the questions

happened to be about video games today. Oh, that's not. That's always good. Hello. Oh,

uh, Crisly Bear Rone. He says, hello, Joker, Jacob and Grunt. Derek mentioned, uh, layer of the shadow broker

last episode. This is probably a while ago. Uh, and I could be, I think so. And I agree. It was a, it was big and epic.

Uh, what do you guys think about the loud, wet fart that was Leviathan, or the unspeakably awful travesty that was arrival. Why is Lay

of the shadow broker, the only good Mass Effect DLC. That's not even true. Yeah, I don't think that's true. That's not true at all. That's a bunch of good DLCs, though. What do you mean? So Leviathan

was not really a bad DLC, in my opinion. I think it was just much-needed lore. It was just a lore DLC. And it was kind of fascinating to the point where, you know, if you didn't play it, which is arguably kind of fucked up,

you wouldn't know the origins of the reapers. So the Leviathan DLC is actually important to know where they came from. And so it was much more to me just kind of, oh, that was cool. You know, I didn't really, it wasn't really that challenging. It was just interesting. And so I wouldn't call it bad. Yeah. Like if you're comparing it to the shower broker, that of course you would be like,

this is, but that's not even, I would say maybe the Omega DLC is a little bit more comparable to the shower broker with something like an epic. adventure and shit like that. But I would say the Citadel DLC, which I've talked about before, there's part one and part two that came out in I think in 2013 that was just the

true ending of like the farewell, this is it and it's beautiful. It's fun, charming. You get to like pretty much hang out with your whole. I would just say I would recommend if anyone hasn't played that. I'm assuming you did. If you got the legendary

edition, you probably play. played that shit and you play it a little bit before you beat the third game. And yeah, it was great. I would say the other one that he said if he was talking about the one where you find the stupid Jamaican alien,

when you actually get a fucking protein because the proteans have Jamaican accents. And it's just kind of funny. So the proteins that, you know, the old race, that fucking, that last empire that were in, that you know that were destroyed by the reapers right you know fucked them in the ass so then they finally

found right one that was still like alive right and and then they they fucking take them out of the and then we're all like excited i was excited like oh shit you're probably gonna learn some history and it's like oh i'm just a soldier so like everybody has their jobs that they're pretty much born into so i don't know shit about shit and so it was a kind of a huge flaw and we're the point you're like this i don't care about this jamaican soldier like he's not going to tell me anything about Prothians and so uh yeah I just like I love his accent though

it's just they're just like all right what are we gonna do now because they use like you know the kind of Russian thing with Talley like everybody kind of has somewhat of a thing or uh and then yeah dude I am Javik and I was just like oh shit it's Kingston

what's up man how you doing? How you doing? I'm doing man that's so disrespectful that's so rude bro he insulted my fucking I mean Look up javik

I mean I I'm like hey that that is That's a Caribbean alien Before before you even met me Year before I met me Oh look that's Kingston Yeah wait I was I was playing it

And when I bought the DLC And I was like holy shit that's Kingston I can't believe this And your brain went lapsed Because you don't know me yet You were like Who is Kingston Like I started

from my nose. It's like that stupid terminator bullshit, right? It's just like some cyclical shit that makes no sense at all. I hated that, bro. How John Carter, John Carter's father goes back in time and Kyle Reese. Kyle Reese goes back in time and fucks John's mom to make John. So if John's dad never went back in time, John wouldn't have been made and it's never would have happened.

So if he stayed there and minded his own fucking business, that person, that problem would have never started and it's like what the fuck it's such a stupid like i want to fucking punch like that was uh that was uh that was our boy um um i don't want to fuck his name what's oh my god he's his name no no no no no he's Cameron oh my god yes thank you thank you i was gonna fuck up his name i was like it's the James Cameron i want i would if he pitched that to me I would punch him in the face like it would it just because like it's it's like I can't get over how stupid of a concept that is. I'm like, sorry that's not clever to me.

It's just not. It's so stupid. It's really dumb. It's really bad. Like, fuck you, man. It's really fucking bad. Like, it's like, but people love that though. People love that stupid shit. They're like, oh, that's so cool. It's such a cool concept. And I'm like, I don't know. I don't like it. I don't like it. Hey, Terminator 2 is fucking fun, though. I love that movie. Terminator 2 is good. Terminator 2 is fucking fantastic.

But, uh, all right. We'll do, we'll do one more. Let's do it. Landon Hanson wrote it. He says, hey, CT&D. Current TikTok has been going through the devious lick trend, and it has seriously affected my high school. Some kids stole a toilet and other pissed in the soap dispensers. And now we have teachers checking us in and out of the bathrooms.

It's crazy. I didn't know that we have a fucking listener that can tell us about this. because I've heard about it. I love devious licks. I love the phrase. The phrase a devious lick. That's the problem. It sounds too delicious.

It sounds too good. It is a good phrase. Because I've heard hit a lick before. Hit it. That's some niggish shit. That means you're about to go do some ignorant shit. You're going to do some shit that can possibly put you in jail. That's what it in a lick is.

But to make a lick devious, that means you have to then understand that like, I'm about to do something that's going to be bad. It's going to have lasting effects. Dude, it's going to be rammed for cash. Like, possibly that stole the toilet. That's fucking,

that's fucking insane. That is, that's like I stole the emergency backup generator at the hospital. And it's like, holy shit, bro. That's crazy, dude. People are going to die.

Yo, bro, there's a blackout. Like, people are going to die, dude. Like, you're walling. Just one thunderstorm and everyone's gone. That kid's Katie is going to go sky fucking high.

He's gonna get a nuke, bro. Did you see that story, by the way? I tweeted this story out earlier, that horse that ate all those fucking malaria vaccines and died and stentaneously. That poor little horsey, I saw it, bro. That was so sad. It was just lying on its side.

It's not sad. It killed 2,000 people. Success starts with your drive. An American public university is here to fuel it. With affordable tuition and over 200 flexible online programs, APU helps you gain the skills and confidence to move forward.

Whether you're changing careers, starting fresh, or pursuing a lifelong passion, our programs are designed for people who never stop. You bring the fire, APU will fuel the journey. Learn more at APU.APUS.edu. I've got Dan Morgan here on the pod. Say hi, Dan. Hey, how's it going today?

It's going good, man. Tell us who you are and what you do. I'm Dan Morgan. I'm an attorney and a managing partner at Morgan and Morgan, which is America's largest injury, law firm. That's pretty awesome. I think I saw billboard of years recently that said 20 billion one. 20 billion is an insane number. Yeah, 20 billion recovered. It's actually, I think, somewhere north,

probably closer to 22, 23 after this year. And each year we get bigger and batter and our army grows. So the number will hopefully keep getting bigger and bigger as time goes on. Awesome. So how does someone get in contact with Morgan and Morgan? What would I do if I got into an accident? Probably the easiest way is dialing pound law. That's pound. 529 from your cell phone. We are always open. Our call center is always waiting to take your call. 24-7, 365. Wow. Dan Morgan. From Morgan and Morgan, America's Large Injury Law from, thanks for coming by the show. Thanks for having me. Visit for thepeople.com for an office near you. But it didn't do it on perp. Like, you can't. A horse didn't do that with its own choice.

It ate 2,000 vials of malaria, bro. That's fucking hilarious. I'm sorry. Anyway. Wait, the question, the question, right. So you have people. teachers checking this in and out of bathrooms what's the worst thing that happened at your schools due to a trend now this is an interesting question because I actually don't know if we were in school for internet trends

like I remember the first big trend was like game themselves for me what about just a trend in general like any type of trend that happened at your school that something something anything can you think of anything well niggas bringing guns and shit it's not a trend

drinking and smoke in school like we didn't have trend that's not a trend that's just your neighborhood oh we had one trip to keep the teacher got stabbed Chris oh yeah I do the teacher stabbed other teacher that happened in my school too that was what I'm that was my

AP English teacher that stabbed other person yeah you got a pretty cool school it was a pretty epic it was a pretty epic place I knew one kid that went there who wasn't you and uh he's you know he watches he watches the podcast

in a way, you know. What does that mean? Is he dead? He watches over us, I think. He watches over us. That place is crazy, dude. Because I was in high school from 2007 to 2011, and I don't... I can't recall a trend.

Like, there were general trends, like, scene kids and, like, emo and, like, that type of deal. But there wasn't, like, this hit item. that everybody had or like some like specific fashion trend it was like that was like internet time that was like the trend was just the fact that the internet was kind of becoming real for everybody and like hey you got facebook yeah man i got facebook send me a message and you got that bo-dum and like that old fucking sound or whatever the fuck and then like twitter in 2009 like that was the most thing i watch equals three and it's like oh i watch equals three too rolyly john just said the word niggas a bunch and i'm like yeah i remember he said that that's it yeah that's it yeah that's it yeah that

That's so funny. I love it when he says that. I can say that too now. I don't know. My family's German. My high school had, the closest thing I think was since we were bored, we made things trend in our high school. One of them, we had ice band at our school for a while because we started a school-wide ice fight. Because at lunch, you know, we all had our cups of violence. ice with our sodas and shit. And I don't know how it happened, but everyone got involved. People that don't have any business being involved in any of the shenanigans.

And there was fucking ice everywhere. And then for a while, one of them were slipped and died. Someone probably fucking split their head over. Yeah, yeah. You, ice is no fucking joke, man. That reminds me of like, I had a dream once where like I was sitting in my cafeteria. I remember this dream very vividly. I had it like in Glendale when we lived in the first place, sweetie, but Jalen.

I remember I had it because I woke up like sweating in that room that never got any fucking air conditioning because it was like the worst fucking room of the world. And I remember I woke up because I had this dream that I was sitting in my high school cafeteria eating food talking to my, talking to Marco actually in the dream, our friend Marco. And then some kid goes, bullet fight. And he has a bunch of bullets in his shirt and he's throwing bullets fast enough that they're killing. people and everybody's like yo fucking nobody else brought bullets and it was like a school shooting but it was just like kid with his hands he's just that quick it was like really like that

because that was like it was like his hands in the west and he was it was just giggling you didn't know he was doing anything wrong he was like bullet fight he and he like really like really like throw his whole body into it like he was pitching fastballs and it was just the i was like yo i got to get out of here and I remember sprinting down the hallway and I tripped and I woke up. But imagine, imagine you go to school right and you have like a security thing. Like my school had like the bag checker. Like I had the metal detector.

Imagine go to school and some kid just has bullets. No gun. Just bullets. That's even more disturbing for some reason. But it's like, you have a gun in school. So who has the gun? I don't know. I was a gun.

Somebody might have one. I don't know. He was just going to hold the fucking, he was just going to hold the bullet up to someone's chest. and then like, forcing it in there. You ever see fucking fists of the North Star

or that dude just putting his fingers in Keniro's chest? Oh my God, man. We didn't have some, man. Like, I don't know. Like, just, we lived in the era where school shootings, like at least me and Chris,

like at the end of our school lives. Like, we lived in an era where school shootings could have been a very real thing, especially where we fucking lived. That could have been like a very reality. Dude, I remember some kid threatened, we had like a threat like that at some point.

And I remember being like, fuck, man. I'm glad I didn't piss anybody off. I don't bother people. It was one of those moments where I was like, man, I'm thankful that I'm small enough to fit through these like awkwardly open windows. You know how like schools have like those windows that open real awkward? I was like,

I'm getting the fuck out of here. These people are fucking. I hated it because if that happened, most of my classes were on the second. floor and it's like, oh man, if I jump out this window, I'm not playing basketball for the rest of the seasons. Like, I gotta make a choice. Either I'm gonna hide under bodies. Because that's grim, that's grim as far. I'll hide out under bodies. I'm not, I'm not about it. Listen, listen, listen. I do remember that being like a distinct fear, like sometimes. Like,

there was anxiety, like, specifically, like, because it was just, I don't even know if it necessarily happened all that much when we were in high school, but like, we heard about it a lot. Yeah. And, like, when was, when was, well, we had Virginia Tech, I know. That was good for us. They were all before us by quite a bit. No, Virginia Tech was, uh, 2000, like, four, dude. No. Mm-hmm.

No, it wasn't. Virginia Tech? Like, 2004, bro. No fucking way. I do not believe that. It was definitely old school. I don't think Virginia Tech was. Because Collinbine was like the 90s.

Virginia Tech shooting was, uh, 2007. Oh, really? Yeah. But it was before I was in high school, though, it was April. So, like, it was like that... The Asian guy that was just like fucking like morphies or some shit, right? Yeah, yeah, that was the Asian dude. Yeah.

He was reenacted in anime. I forgot which one it was, but like, yeah, he... Sound like that happened. Yeah, yeah. Pokemon or something. But yeah, so Virginia Tech happened right before I went into high school. So, like, I remember being like, ah. Yeah, not great.

And then, like, obviously because of Virginia Tech, Columbine came up. again. So people were like flipping out. And I remember that was, I remember when I got out of school, I was like, thank fucking God. I don't have to deal with this shit no more. And then right after that Sandy Hook, bro, right after we graduated, the Sandy Hook happened. Like right, right after, like, my first year in Dutches when I met everybody.

That's what happened. And I was like, oh, Lord. And then that gave us. A brighter note. Yeah, and then that gave us Alex Jones. And now here we are today. The fucking champion of God, Alex Jones. The one is Sandy Hook. Sandy Hook.

I did his hand. Sandy Hook. All right, I think Kids are pissing me off. Now's about the time where we say goodbye. Thank you guys for joining on up.

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