The Squeeze - Kay Dudley: The Reality of Motherhood

Episode Date: May 13, 2026

In this week’s episode, Tay sits down with content creator and founder of Hey!Nu Kay Dudley! Kay gets into all things pregnancy and motherhood, sharing how each of her pregnancies has looked completely different and opening up about the physical and emotional changes she’s experienced through pregnancy and postpartum. She talks about navigating body image, the pressure moms often feel around feeding choices, and why she strongly believes that fed is best when it comes to formula versus breastfeeding. Kay also reflects on how she first got started on social media, what it’s been like sharing motherhood online, and the advice she’d give to new parents trying to protect and strengthen their marriage during such a major life transition. She shares what support from her spouse truly looks like, how she learned to ask for help, and her experience with postpartum depression. Kay also opens up about her lupus diagnosis, including the symptoms she experienced, the long road to finally getting answers, and her advice for anyone struggling to advocate for themselves and feel heard by medical professionals. She also talks about launching Hey!Nu, her plant-based, gluten-free protein bar brand, before wrapping up with the Lemon 7 segment!Be sure to follow Kay https://instagram.com/kay.dudley/ and Kay & Tay https://instagram.com/kayandtayofficial/!Check out the Hey!Nu here: https://heynu.com/To email us your questions or share your story, you can reach out to [e-mail] sure to rate, review, and follow the podcast so you don't miss an episode! Plus, follow us on all of our socials:The SqueezeInstagram: https://instagram.com/thesqueeze/TikTok: https://tiktok.com/@thesqueezepodcastTay LautnerInstagram: https://instagram.com/taylautner/TikTok: https://tiktok.com/@mrstaylautnerAmazon Storefront https://urlgeni.us/amazon/FDXj7 Taylor LautnerInstagram: https://instagram.com/taylorlautner/TikTok: https://tiktok.com/@taylorlautnerTo learn more from The Lemons Foundation, follow https://instagram.com/lemonsbytay/ and visit https://lemonsbytay.comEpisode Sponsors:Visit drinkspindrift.com and use code tay for 15% off.Get up to $200 off Square hardware when you sign up at square.com/go/squeeze! #squarepodGo to tonal.com and use promo code SQUEEZE for $200 off your purchase.Go to http://shadyrays.com and use code SQUEEZE for 40% off 2+ pairs of polarized sunglasses.Let yourself run, lift, fail, try and go. Explore Peloton Cross Training Tread+ at onepeloton.com.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

It took me six years to get diagnosed. I did all of the initial labs. Every single one of them came back fine. So I was able to get diagnosed, which was incredible, and I was so thankful. Like, I remember crying because I was happy that I got diagnosed because I knew. Like, I didn't want to be diagnosed, but I wanted validation. You can have one really good breastfeeding journey, and then you can have not a good breastfeeding journey. And you just have to do what is mentally best for you.

That is a pill I will die on, by the way. I've made the decision to breastfeed, but that's my decision. That doesn't mean that any other mom that's going to do it a different way is wrong. A fed baby is best, in my opinion. A mentally sane mom is so much better than a mom who is just mentally, like, struggling every single day. I struggled with school. I didn't graduate. I've never really talked about that.

I had a doctor. I'll never forget. He called me and he was like, I don't think this is going to come as a surprise to you, but it's very obvious you have ADHD. I feel like my childhood was robbed in a way. Tay and I had like a controversy a few years ago. And I think in that moment, I felt like that was it. And like, it would never get better. I told myself I wasn't going to cry.

Hello, lemon drops. Welcome back to another episode of The Squeeze. I am so happy that you are here with us today. And I'm so excited about today's episode because I'm sitting down with Kay Dudley. If you don't know who she is, she is the other half behind the viral couple of Kay and Tay. There's a lot of Tays in this episode. just warning you. But Kay and her husband have a massively popular lifestyle and family account with millions of followers across TikTok and Instagram. She's known for their relatable humor,

heartfelt content, and Kay has built a strong connection with her audience by sharing the realities of marriage and motherhood, from pregnancy journeys to raising their daughters and navigating life as growing family. More recently, she's been opening up about this new chapter of life she's in, including welcoming their newest baby and adjusting to life with two under two. Today we dive into things all mom, postpartum, and Kay actually recently has been dealing with some health issues that led to a hospitalization. Everything is fine, but we dive into that and what it's like to have to advocate for yourself when you know something is wrong with your body, but doctors just aren't listening to you. We cover so many topics, Kay is so darling,

and I feel like I learned so much about her, and just the strength that she exudes is true. Unmatched and I can't wait for you guys to hear fun. Okay, welcome to the squeeze. Thank you. I'm so excited. This is really fun because I'm about to like ask you so many mom questions. You're going to be like, oh my gosh, why did I sign up for this? No, I love it. I love to give my my mom knowledge to everyone that wants it. So good. Okay, so we start each episode off with this jar. It's a little game called Citrus Scott Real if you want to pull a little piece of paper out of there and read it to our lemon drops. Those are our listeners. Okay. It says, what's the hill you will absolutely die on? Oh. Goodness. Oh, I know mine. All the things. I'm thinking of all the things. You might have to give me a

hill that I will absolutely die on. I'll tell you mine and then. Yeah, you tell me yours. Maybe I'll have a jog. Yeah, maybe it'll get the thoughts flowing. Pineapple on pizza. Oh, that's a good one. No, I'll die on that hill too. Yeah. 100%. I don't know why people don't like that. It's like that. It's like. It's like. kind of like sweet and salty. Yeah. It just goes together. Yeah. I mean, I would say SPF over makeup every day. Like, I mean, obviously I did my makeup today, but so that's not a good example. But SPF, like, it's the one thing I would take with me on a stranded island. Yeah. So important. No, that's, I think one size. I think I just got it in PR one size just came out with like a setting spray that has SPF in it. Oh. Oh, I need that. Yeah. I really need that. I know. Because that's

something I struggle with because my mom's an esthetician and she's always like you need like you need sound screen. Yeah. But it's hard when you like want to do your makeup and then sometimes I'll put it on underneath and then it just like my makeup will feel weird or I just feel like my skin like my pores get clogged when I do that. Yeah. I do my makeup like very seldomly. And most of the time it's like SPF and like my moisturizer and that's it. And I just, I feel like my skin's never been better since I started doing that. So yeah.

I was going to say your skin like literally looks. So smooth. You're just glowing as well, by the way. Oh, that's nice. That's nice. No, it is. And this is going to be like the time where you're glowing. So.

Yeah. I'm, I feel like I'm kind of waiting for that to happen, honestly, because I am still just breaking out so much. Okay. No, it does not look back. Thanks to the makeup. But, no, my first trimester, I was like breaking out face in my scalp, like, even like on my chest and on my back, which I never. Yeah. I never normally.

break out like ever. Yeah. And so that's, that was definitely, um, an adjustment for me. But it humbles you. Yeah. That was me with my last pregnancy. Well, not like my last, but my last. Um, with Ellie, I had never had cystic acne in my life. And I started breaking out so bad. Like, I mean, it hurts your confidence. Like, you're already going through all these changes. But then, like, to be on camera every day too. I was like, I don't want to show my face to anyone. Um, so yeah, I get that. That's so true. I've actually been thinking about this.

What similar or differences did you have in your two pregnancies? That's a good question. So with, well, I've had three pregnancies total. With my first, it was like nothing. Like, I was 19. So in a lot of ways, this, like my second pregnancy was new again. It was so different than the first. It was 12 years' difference.

But with my first, I had like no nausea, no acne. nothing. Like I, if you told me, I was, like, you wouldn't be able to tell I was pregnant other than my bump. Like, I had no symptoms. And everyone was like, that's the exception. Like, that's not really how it is for most people. Yeah. So I just knew going into my next ones, it was going to be like a piece of cake. And that was the furthest thing from the truth. My second pregnancy humbled me. It had the acne. I had horrible nausea. And I don't know why they call it morning sickness because I was sick like all day. Yeah. And then with my last pregnancy, It was a little better than with Ellie.

The acne was better, but I did start using my Glow serum, which is something, it has like, it's oxygen infused, it has vitamin C and AHA blend. So it helps a lot and it's pregnancy safe. So I was using that, but I would say that's the only real difference other than it was a different pregnancy. And I really didn't have any nausea either with that pregnancy. So every pregnancy is so different. And even if it's the same person, the same dad, it doesn't even matter gender because I had all girls and like they were all so different. Yeah. So you really can't be sure from one to the next

if it's going to be the same or not. Yeah. No, I've been, I've been thinking about it a lot because I mean, my pregnancy has been fine. My first trimester obviously was not fun. But now being in the second, I'm like able to be alive and functioning to some degree. But yesterday I was like just having a meltdown and I was like, I don't think I like being pregnant, which like, you know, sounds horrible to say, but like, I'm not enjoying the, I'm not really enjoying all of the things that come along with it. I feel like that's such a valid, like feeling. So many people feel that way and they don't want to express that because, you know, people struggle to get pregnant. You have people that can never get pregnant. And you don't want to offend those people by saying, like, you're not happy and you're,

I mean, you're happy, but you're miserable. But that's something like you're entitled to feel that. You know, it's, it sucks the life out of you. It's hard. It's very hard to be pregnant. And, you know, that's like this is not to like scare you but this is just the beginning like you're pregnant but then you have postpartum um and i mean you have like the version of you before a baby and then you have the version after and for me that happened at 19 and i never really got to enjoy my 20s where like i didn't have stretch marks or you know just a lot of things that none of my friends had to deal with yet and i mean that was my fault and you know i'm not blaming anybody but it it's just something that as i've gotten older i've gotten more appreciate

of my body changes, but it is hard to kind of wrap your mind around that. But you're a lot to feel, you're a lot to feel that. And it doesn't mean that you're not happy to be pregnant and you're not happy and excited. For sure. But you don't have to like it. Yeah. Yeah. I think I've dealt with, I've never really struggled with comparison.

But I've definitely found myself comparing like my pregnant body to other pregnant women, especially like the women that are like weeks away from giving birth and are still. like all skinny and fit and I'm like in my husband's jeans right now and it's like I'm like yeah just not having a grand old it's the first time I've really like had that struggle before which I think might also be a thing but I think it's I'm already like not feeling great about myself but then the comparison aspect of it is yeah and social media is like like with my first pregnancy I didn't have that and I often like wondered like why did I feel totally I didn't feel mentally like afterwards was when I did because of the stretch marks they came literally in the last four weeks

so that was unfortunate I almost made it um but I didn't have anything to compare it to like nobody was showing their belly like exposed back then um it wasn't very normal to like wear like belly shirts and your belly hanging out which I mean I'm all about embracing it like I mean I even did with my last two pregnancies a little bit more than I did with my first but you know I didn't have anything to compare it to so I was like this is normal. but then you start seeing these like fitness gurus that are like, you know, doing squats and these, like they're just like doing all the things and they have like the tiniest frame and their belly's just little bitty tiny, cute bump. And I'm massive when I'm pregnant. And I'm very like small framed

already. I'm short. And so my torso is not very big. Yeah, there's nowhere. I was literally just having this conversation with my girlfriend yesterday. We were like, there's nowhere for any of the baby, the body, for anything to go. It goes out. And so you typically will feel a lot larger. And, That's like something just being on social media. I had to start like blocking out those comments because people would be like, are you sure she's only 12 weeks? She looks a lot more like 25 weeks or, you know, just comments like that. And it starts to get to you because you're like not any one body is the same with pregnancy. Everybody carries differently.

If it's your second or third, you're definitely going to show quicker. But yeah, social media makes it a lot harder on yourself. What is your relationship with social media? because obviously your work is social media. You're very active on there, always sharing parts of your life. How have you kind of learned, how long have you been doing it actually?

Like as a job? As a job. So we started the beginning of 2022, but I didn't go full time until the end of 2022. So it was almost 2023. So very, like, relatively new. Yeah. It kind of like, I say blew up,

but I feel like some people have like a blow up moment and it's like a two-week thing and then they go from like nothing to like millions. Yeah. That's not how it was for us. But it definitely like over the first year, we hit a million at one year. Like literally to the day, it was crazy. If you hear baby noises. Yeah.

That's my baby in here. That's my baby. She's self-soothing, by the way. That's what she does when she's trying to go back to sleep. But anyway, so when I went full time, it was kind of a gradual like, I don't know, progression. and yeah, it's only been like three or four years. But my relationship with social media is I don't, I don't really consume a lot of social media, if I'm being honest.

Like, I don't follow. I mean, I follow people, but I'm not really like closely monitoring anyone, like, in particular. I kind of just scroll, like, I don't even really get, I haven't gone on TikTok. This is going to sound crazy. But I have not actually opened my TikTok app in over a year, probably. Taylor posts everything. And TikTok is one of those.

Kay's husband is named Taylor, just so. That is a little confusing. So my, like, Taylor, my Taylor. Yes. Just to our listeners that weren't aware of that. There's a lot of Tay's and Taylor's going to be thrown around here. But my Taylor, he does all the, like, social media posting. And it just got to, like, a few years ago, I was struggling mentally, like, reading comments.

And I'm not a posting ghost person. I have to read all the comments. And it mentally starts, like, it starts getting to you when you have way too much feedback coming. Like no one single person should be seeing that much about people's opinions about themselves or how they're parenting or how they're living their lives or whatever. And a lot of people have really mean nasty opinions about people. And so I just got to a point where I was like, I can't get on that app anymore. It, to me, seemed a more toxic than Instagram. Yeah.

I feel like with Instagram, it's more of a community. I feel like I've, Tay and I both have created a really good community on there. Yeah. And I can get on there a little bit easier than I can't TikTok. But I haven't been on there over a year probably. No, that's. Yeah. It's crazy.

That's really good. I've thought about deleting the app, to be honest, because, I mean, I don't really have a reason to be on there. Yeah. Because Tay posts it. So. Yeah. No, that's, that's really good. And I feel like, too, when I'm posting more on, like when I'm, because I'm in no way,

I don't consider myself a content creator because I have. No, I'm not, that's like, that's a job title that I do not own because I'm not posting multiple times a day. Like I'm not, there's no consistency anywhere in anything. But when I am trying to be more consistent with posting, I find myself not on the apps as much because it is more like work. So I'm not really like, I'll pop on to like, you know, respond to a couple comments and do whatever tricks that people say you're supposed to do for the engagement that I'll like go off. Yeah. So I feel like that's a good spot to be in. And that's probably helped a lot with,

were you seeing the comments more so like in the beginning? Or before you stopped looking? The comments, yeah, in the beginning, it was, I mean, nobody really knew who we were in the beginning. So the comments were a little bit more harsh because they were just like, they had no idea what our story was or anything. And then as we built a community, they got a little better.

But with TikTok, the people there are just a little more. brutal and so I would see all those comments like especially as we started getting larger and getting more views and yeah it was just it was really hard to get on and people make like the talking head videos is what I call them and so they'll like take something that you like said whether it's on a podcast or in a reel that you posted or you know a story or whatever and they'll clip it and then they'll post it and put a little talking head and it's like critiquing whatever you said and I just didn't want to like run into those kind of videos so I just I was like I'm just going to shut it out and you know It's a job, like you said. It's job. It helps me provide for my family. And that's really what I have to, like, mentally tell myself.

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when you and since becoming parents you and taylor how do you feel like your um relationship has evolved and do you have any advice um for myself and my marriage and for anyone listening that's maybe a new parent yes um i would say it's actually something i don't want to say like struggled but it was definitely an awakening for tay and i to um have our first together because we were together like almost eight years before we got pregnant. So we had a lot of time where it was like, like we didn't have like an infant. And once we did, you almost get like this, without even trying, you almost get like this roommate feeling where you're both just like in deep in the parenting. And in order to get out of that, we really had to prioritize time together

like in the evenings. And I feel like this is very normal for most couples. But you kind of, unintentionally get into this like roommate stage where you just feel like you're just deep in the weeds of parenting and you're not sleeping. I wasn't really doing a whole lot to like not that I let myself go, but I mean, I was just like I was breastfeeding and I had milk stains and I was pumping all the time and I was, you know, still looked pregnant. So it's, we really had to like prioritize our evenings together. So once we put the girls down, even in the very beginning when Sutton was still like not on a schedule, we would like put her down next to us and we would like have a movie night. And we really try to do that multiple times a week. And I think that helps a lot.

We don't personally like go out to dinner a lot. But I feel like that is something like prioritizing a date night. Even if even if that is at home, like just as long as you're prioritizing time between you two. At the end of the day, like your kids will have a better life if their parents are like having, if they have a strong relationship. Like you want to be able to model that relationship for your children. So true. Yeah, because that's more important than, you know, not that your kids shouldn't come first, but your kids really, in my opinion,

should not come before your marriage. Like you have to balance it. Yeah. You can't let your marriage go. Yeah. No, I've been trying to, we've been trying to do like date nights and things or like if, if something happens and we're like, oh, a date brunch,

like Taylor, or I got a nail on the tire and Taylor took my Taylor. We're used to multiple tailors over here, so I think our Loma drops will get it. I got an all the tire and he went to go fix it for me, but then I had to go pick him up because they were changing it. And then we ended up, I was hungry. So we ended up getting tacos at this restaurant next door. And we're like, oh, date. Like we're like trying to kind of like romanticize all of our like little moments together. That's literally our like slogan is romanticizing all of life's moments, whether that's like going for a

furniture shopping or just literally anything, we try to just romanticize every aspect of it. And that's such a good way to put it is like even if it's just a nail in the tire and you have to like go get it fixed or something. Yeah. Make it a date. Like make it fun. Yeah. How what does like support look like for the two of you and how how do you ask or have that line of

communication with your partner when you're needing more support? Because I feel like a lot of women haven't maybe had those conversations yet. with their spouses about needing that support because a lot of, especially if you're breastfeeding, a lot of the job falls on the mom. How would you, like, what would your advice be to on that? I mean, you definitely can't hold in your feelings. I feel like with Taylor, I'm, I'm really, I've learned to be very open and just like honest with him when I'm feeling anyway. Like after I had Ellie, I was not expecting, like I said, with Kinsley, with my first, I didn't really have, like, postpartum depression or, um, baby blues, nothing. Like, I just, I mean, I wasn't,

obviously that marriage ended, but in terms of like the pregnancy emotions and mental health, I was pretty good. Um, but with Taylor, I wasn't expecting to have like such significant sadness afterwards. Like, it, it hit me like out of nowhere. I would just cry for nothing, like literally nothing. And I had to learn to just tell him, like, this is how I'm feeling. I need your support. I need you to help me. And I will say I am very lucky that I have somebody who takes on the parenting. Like, he doesn't babysit. He's 100% in. And I think that's like, that's such a big thing. And I feel like, like you said, a lot of women don't have that. But I feel like if they're not experiencing that with their husband, they've just got to like tell them. They have to

tell them like, hey, I'm overwhelmed because moms do get overwhelmed. You're breastfeeding. You're going through body changes and you just have to be open to communication. Yeah. Yeah. Did you, did you breastfeed with both, or I guess all of your pregnancies? Yeah. Um, okay. I'm trying to figure out like what, what I want to do. I think, because everyone, I don't know why it is such a common question. And it's such a controversial one too. Yeah. So many people have very strong opinions. about it. Yeah. I just read an article. I think your name is Elsie. It's Pete Davidson's wife. Oh, okay. Yeah. Or partner, baby mama. I'm not sure where they're at into their marital journey. But she wrote an article that my friend sent me about her decision to not breastfeed. It actually was like a really,

it just kind of like opened my eyes to just like have, it was really nice to just read. It was really nice to just read. someone talking about it because the truth is there's also like I've friends that you know did formula with their first and then breastfed the second or vice versa I also have friends that her first one breastfed and then the second one was allergic to her breast milk so she had to do form like there was just like so many random things so I think I'm trying to go into it with like both like what if you know what if my baby doesn't want to watch what if like there's just so many like there's so many variables yeah and like you said like one you can have one really good um like breastfeeding journey and then you can have not a good breastfeeding journey and you just

have to do what is mentally best for you yeah and like that is a hill i will die on by the way which i could not think of that earlier but that is that's so like to my core i feel like obviously i've made the decision to breastfeed but that's my decision that doesn't mean that any other mom that's going to do it a different way is wrong a fed baby is a is a is bad in my opinion. But, and like, like even this, this journey with Sutton, I, I have lupus. I can't take my lupus medication when I'm breastfeeding. So I mentally went into it this time knowing that if I had to stop, I would stop. And I'm not going to like torture myself because I have like this goal, which is what I did the last time with Ellie. I had this goal and I was like miserable and I felt

terrible all, all postpartum. And I, I think you just have to do what's best for you because a A mentally, um, mentally sane mom is so much better than a mom who is just, they can't do it anymore. You know, you're just mentally like struggling every single day. Like that's not good for your baby.

So I think you have to like just tune out all of the opinions. Like you're going to see so many opinions. Not just on breastfeeding. Like everything you do, whether you get the epidural. Like you're going to get so much unsolicited advice. It's not even funny. I'm sure you already have.

Um, and it's just like, you just got to do you. Do you. don't worry about anybody else. Like, you know what your baby needs. You know what you need. You know what your husband needs.

Yeah. And I think that's like priority number one. Yeah. That's so true. What has your experience when you've kind of talked about like postpartum and did you struggle with postpartum depression with any of your pregnancies? Yes. So my last pregnancy, I feel like I got through it a lot quicker.

I even, I was just telling Tay the other day. I kind of thought that I had gotten through it this time, like, you know, a few months. But I've even in the last like few months like and it could be because I've been so sick. But I feel like the last month or two like I don't know if it's like a relapse or what, but I have felt like just so sad. Like I'll just cry for no reason. And I've heard that it can like happen like that. Like you can just have like days where you feel great mentally and then you can just not feel good again. That's been honestly the hardest part of postpartum for me is just like crying about every single thing. And literally not like I don't even have to have a reason to cry. I. I can just literally feel hopeless. Yeah. It's so weird because you'll just cry and like, T, he'll be like, what's wrong? And I'm like, I don't know.

Like, I have no, I, I don't even know how to fix it because I don't even know what's wrong with me. I'm just sad for no reason. That's, that's very challenging. That's the hardest part for me. Like, I feel like guys when women cry are just like, what do I do? Yeah. How do I fix this? And it's such, it's, it's like, biologic for like good men to want to fix the problem.

and that's something that Tay, like, I think it would get to him when, like my Tay, it would get to him whenever I would be crying and he would like not know how to fix it and he wanted to fix it so bad. And it took a while for him to realize like there's nothing he can do to fix it. He just has to be there for me. That's like the biggest thing is just making sure that for like other women to like don't let your husband like feel like they need to fix it and don't expect them to fix it because they're not going to. Like you're just going to feel this way. two hours later or the next day. Just holding you saying whatever you need to vent, vent, like just like a vent sesh. Like, you know, that helps a lot. I'll just vent about like a million things. And he's like, okay. And he just like listens. It's just getting to that point in your relationship where you just, it's an open door and you can just vent and listen to each other. I think that's been really, really helpful for us. Yeah. I've been trying to practice that more before the baby comes. I want to talk about your lupus. You touched on in a little bit. That's something that I've been learning more about because during all of the pregnancy

and my testing, I had my autoimmune marker come back positive. Thankfully, my cells are just speckled, which means that I only have like a 5% chance of getting lupus, but that's still there. Yeah. But it was something that I literally had no clue about. And that, I feel like a lot of, there are a lot of celebrities that have lupus. Yeah. I've heard of it, but I never really have thought of it deeply until going through that.

How, when were you diagnosed with lupus? January of 2025. Oh, wow. It took me six years to get diagnosed. It's been a long journey, like one of the hardest journeys I've ever been through. But there was just something about being validated. Like I knew for years. Yes.

So my mom has lupus, which is another reason I kept pushing and advocating for myself. because I, so she got diagnosed in her 30s. She had symptoms for years, but she didn't get diagnosed until I was like late teens. And I saw what that, what she went through. And I also, I mean, when I say like carbon copy, my mom and I are like, when it comes to our bodies and like health, we're like the same. Like on a checkbook. Like, yeah, literally the same. So she was able to like see my symptoms very early on.

I mean, it was so mild that most people, and. quoting myself probably would have just like brushed it off. I would have like random little like body aches and then you know kind of where you feel like you're about to get the flu or something. And then it wouldn't happen for like two weeks. So I just didn't really like take it seriously at first. And she was like, no, that's like you need to at least be checked. Like I'm not saying you have lupis because there's so many symptoms with autoimmune that overlap. Yeah. Which is another reason it takes so long to get diagnosed. But she was like, I just think you need to at least like get a referral. See a rheumatologist. And I did all of the.

the initial labs, every single one of them came back fine. Like, they were like, you don't have anything wrong. You don't have autoimmune condition. You have nothing. There was one marker actually. It was, my inflammation markers were elevated. But they were like that, you know, it could be that you're getting sick. It could be, they kind of suspected maybe rheumature arthritis, but like serum negative rheumatritis. And then they said like fibromyalgia, you know, I feel like a lot of people get diagnosed with that first because they can't find anything that's wrong. So in the very beginning, I just like kind of, I don't know, not that I was gaslit, but I was kind of just told like, you're fine. And that was very struggle. Like as it started getting worse, it was a struggle to

get doctors to listen to me. And then slowly but surely, my symptoms, because I mean, this is the way it is for most people, I think, that are diagnosed. Their symptoms usually happen first, but their labs don't ever match that until it gets like more severe. So that's what happened with me. And I advocated because I knew my mom had the same symptoms. And I was like, listen, my mom has it. I'm like, I have like five, five times. I think I'm, I think it's like if it's a direct parent is like five times more likely. Um, for like their child to have it. Yeah. Um, so I just kept advocating for myself. And I, one, one time I switched doctors because I moved out of state. And then I saw two different rheumatologists in Texas once I moved to Texas. And my most recent one, she's been incredible. Like,

Three years ago, I started seeing her. And she saw my labs, like, getting worse. And she saw my symptoms. And she started piecing the puzzle together. And she basically called it lupus before I got the official diagnosis because I didn't quite meet the criteria. So she started treating me with hydroxychloroquine. And that actually can make your labs, like, not show up. And so after I had Ellie, I'd still been taking my hydroxychloroquine.

chloroquine, but I was still having symptoms, but I think it was considered mild enough that my labs, like, were still not really showing anything. So she had me come off of it. It has like a 50-day half of life. So you have to wait like over two months or so before you would probably get laps showing up. And then she retested everything. And it all came back. Like, oh, wow. Lupus. Like, she was like, I think you were masking it just enough with the medication. And then also being postpartum, I think it brought out the lupus worse. So I was. able to get diagnosed, which was incredible. And I was so thankful. Like, I, I remember crying because I was happy that I got diagnosed because I knew, like, I didn't want to be diagnosed,

but I wanted validation. I wanted to be treated. I wanted to be able to tell, you know, doctors or whatever, you know, whoever would need to know, like, hey, this is, I wanted a name for it. And I didn't have a name up to that point. It was just like, I think I have, I mean, I have something autoimmune, but I don't know what. And that was so beyond frustrating. because when people ask like, well, what's wrong with you? And you tell them you don't feel good. They're just like, well, you don't have anything. Like, you know what I mean?

Like it just doesn't, it just gives like so much validation when you have like a title for it, an actual name. People take it more seriously. So that was very exciting to finally get that. But I would say since I got the diagnosis, like things didn't get better. Like I thought they were going to get better, but they didn't get better. In fact, my health got worse. I got pregnant again.

So I still couldn't be on medication and breastfeeding. still can't be on medication. And I think I just thought it was going to like, you know, be a light switch and like, oh, everything's good. And in some ways it is. But I feel like now I get more skepticism online. Yeah. People that don't like me are like, oh, she's probably just lying about it.

And I'm like, guys, like, I could show you my chart. Like it has the diagnosis code in there. Like, not lying about it. And that's hard. So that's another reason I don't look at comments because, you know, I'm just trying to advocate for people who struggled for years like I did because you start to feel crazy. You start to feel like a hypochondriact. And then you get that validation. And like I just want to be like a voice for other people who are in that same position because they may not have a mom that like has it

that can help push them along. I was blessed to have that. But yeah, I just want to keep pushing, you know, like be a voice for Lupus. I've been getting more into Lupus.org so I could, you know, help with fundraisers and I'm actually speaking on Saturday at a conference in Dallas. My first public speaking thing. I'm very nervous. Oh my gosh. Not you. No, like millions of views, but it's not the same as getting on a stage and talking

for sure in a microphone. So I'm very nervous about that, but I'm excited because I'm, I feel like if I'm going to look at having this like in one way, it's, I was obvious, I was given lupus so that I could be the voice for other people because I feel like not enough people talk about it. There's no, like, nobody, like so many people don't understand what it is. Like the amount of people, I didn't even realize it, but now being on social media, the amount of people that comment and DM us every day and they're like, what sleep us? I have no idea what that is.

And I just feel like more people need to talk about it. Yeah. That's so true, especially. I feel like really, this whole pregnancy has really opened my eyes to a lot of women's health. Obviously, I've a woman and I feel like being a woman and trying to seek. medical advice sometimes can be so hard because our bodies go through so much stuff, but also because they're so little testing that has been done in the past. And we're just now starting to finally have women in trial groups for medications and

just like crazy things that I just assumed was like a normal thing. Yeah. But it's not. It's not. It's not. And like it's funny you say that because I was recently diet. as an adult with ADHD. And this is another reason that I blink, by the way.

I'm not trying to use excuses. But I'm like, I sometimes will be talking and then flatline. I don't know what I'm saying. But I knew something was like up, like for especially postpartum. It's like it got worse after I had my babies. But working and like doing brain deals where I have to remember like a CTA, I'm like the amount of times to have to refilm something because I'm like, what's the percentage off again?

Like I'll just one second, he'll tell me it, and the next second I forget it. So I finally decided I was going to get tested. And as a child, I only knew boys that had it. I didn't know any girls that had it. And in fact, like, doctors would never even like look at girls and say, oh, there's a chance she has that. Like, it was so rare to find doctors I would do that. And I just really thought, like, if I wasn't bouncing off the walls, there's no way I would have ADHD. So my parents never looked into it.

I mean, I saw a counselor growing up for reason, for other, you know, for, for, you know, for separate reasons than ADHD, obviously. But I saw a counselor, never suspected it. Yeah. But I struggled like mentally and I mean, I was, I know that my mom would probably disagree, but I feel like I was a really bad kid in a lot of ways. And it sucks knowing I could have been helped for so many years. Like I just had to live like that and think I was just like different, you know? Like I, I struggled with school. I didn't graduate, which is something I don't think. think I've never really talked about that, but a lot of people, I think, I don't know the percentage exactly, but it's super common with people with ADHD to not finish school. Like, get your,

I did get my GD, but to not finish college, I didn't finish college. I went to school, actually started going to nursing school. My mom was a nurse and I didn't finish. And so I feel like I always would start things and then I would fail. Like I failed everything growing up. I failed so many things and it wasn't until I started like doing this as a job that I was trying to like remember things and I couldn't remember them that I finally decided to get tested and I'll never forget. This has only been a couple months ago. So I mean, I haven't forgotten yet. But I will never forget. He called me and he was like, I don't think this is going to come to us as a surprise to you, but it's very obvious you have ADHD. I was like, okay, cool. So that was like, again,

validating because then it was like I had an answer for all the things. But it's so. that they didn't look at girls. Yeah. Because I had, I feel like my childhood was robbed in a way because I didn't get looked at. Like, I just, I don't know, it sucks. Yeah. No, I think that average age, I could be wrong, so don't cope me on this. But I think the average age that women get diagnosed with ADHD is like around 40.

Like it's some like crazy sad. One of my friends is she's a therapist and she specializes in ADHD. She has ADHD herself. And we had her on the podcast like probably season one. but she literally was telling me these stats. And I was like, it's just, it's so crazy. It's crazy. Like when I started sharing about it, this is another reason.

It's so annoying to me. But I was sharing about the testing process and like that I thought I had it. And I had never talked about it. So I think people were like, why is she trying to jump on this trend of having ADHD? I'm like, guys, you don't understand what this has done to my entire life. Like there's so much more that I don't share on social media. but once I got tested and I shared it, people were like, this is just a trend. Like everybody's getting diagnosed with ADHD.

Everybody has a little ADHD. Like that's not true. I hate when people say that. Everybody has symptoms of ADHD sometimes. Like maybe your brain is a little like clustered or whatever. But like they would say like, oh, well, that's just being a mom for you. And I'm like, no, it's not. I wasn't a mom in school.

I wasn't a mom when I was a kid. So that's frustrating. I think that's happening because people are not like women. There's like an increase of women getting diagnosed in adulthood now. Like it's suddenly getting like people think it's being overdiagnosed. I think it was under diagnosed. And now people are finally acknowledging it. And so people that don't have it are just like, yeah, sure.

Like you know what I mean? Yeah. So it does suck. And again, it's like I feel like women just get so like they get gaslit when it comes to medical stuff. And you just have to keep advocating for yourself because. Yeah. There's a lot of crappy doctors out there. I had a doctor when I was trying to find out if I had lupus and I went to her and I was like, it hurts when I breathe in in the mornings, like specifically in the mornings. I wake up and I try to breathe in and my chest is like, it's like sharp pain. And she was like, I mean, if I could help you. Or if I could, she said, if I could help you, I would help my grandson. He has asthma, take your inhaler. I mean, it was like literally, because I do have asthma. I was like, this isn't asthma though. It was she just completely blew me.

off. She's like, if I could help you, I would help my grandson who has asthma, but like, there's nothing you could do. I was like, this isn't asthma. Like, I left that office crying. I was, and I never went back to her again, obviously, but it's just like, doctors like that exist and it sucks because they don't listen, especially if you're a woman. Yeah. I need to talk to you about something I feel like is way more relatable than people admit. And it's losing or ruining sunglasses constantly. I swear, I used to buy expensive sunglasses, thinking that meant somehow I would magically become a person who keeps better track of them. And that just has never been the case for me. I leave them in bags. I sit on them accidentally. They fall out of the car. They get scratched.

It's honestly stressful spending a ton of money on sunglasses when, you know, there's a decent chance that something's going to happen to them eventually. Which is why I've been loving Shady Race. And honestly, what shocked me the most is that they genuinely feel every bit as premium as a super expensive sunglasses I used to buy. Like the quality is truly so good. The lenders are polarized, they cut glare really well, the frames feel durable, the hinges feel solid, and they have really clean classic styles that go with everything. The biggest difference for me is that I'm not constantly stressed while wearing them. Like I'll wear them to the beach on walks, driving every day, traveling, throwing them in a tote bag, bringing them on a boat, and I don't have that constant anxiety of if these get ruined, I'm going to be sick. because with their lost and broken protection, if something happens to them, Shady Rays will replace them, which honestly makes such a huge difference because it actually

allows you to wear them and enjoy them instead of babying them all the time. So if you're outside a lot, driving every day, at the lake, on the water, traveling the summer, or honestly, just need sunglasses that actually perform without that insane price tag. Definitely check them out. We've teamed up with Shady Rays to bring you an exclusive offer. head to shady rays.com and use code squeeze for 40% off two or more polarized sunglasses. Try for yourself the shades rated five stars by over 300,000 people. One of the biggest mindset shifts for me lately when it comes to working out has been realizing

how important it is to actually enjoy movement instead of treating it like another thing to check off a list. Peloton helps you unlock all the expansive, joyful feelings you get through movement with Peloton Cross Training Tread Plus powered by Peloton IQ. And I really connect with that because I think sometimes we focus so much on results or routines or doing everything perfectly that we forget movement is also supposed to make you feel good. What I love is that Peloton IQ builds a workout roadmap that's completely yours. So you can stop overthinking and just move. And honestly, I feel like the overthinking is one of the biggest reasons people struggle to stay

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Explore Peloton Cross Training Tread Plus at one Pellicle I feel like managing money day-to-day is one of those things that should sound simple, but somehow it can feel a little more complicated than it needs to be. Like whether it's splitting dinner with friends, paying someone back, or just keeping track of your spending, those little things add up. And it's nice when you have something that just makes it all feel easy and seamless. That's where cash app comes in. I love cash app because it just fits into your everyday routine without feeling complicated. It's super straightforward and everything is in one place. Cash App feels like it just takes something that could feel stressful or annoying, it makes it feel a lot more

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profile at sign up and send $5 to a friend within 14 days. Terms apply Cash App. is a financial services platform, not a bank. Banking services provided by Cash App's bank partners. Prepaid debit cards issued by Sutton Bank, member FDIC. Cash App Green, overdraft coverage, borrow, cashback offers, and promotions provided by Cash App A Block, Inc brand. Visit cash.com.com slash legal slash podcast for full disclosures. That's why it's so important, too, for people with platforms to share about this stuff. so thankful that you're like willing and like willing to be open and honest and share about this stuff because it is really important and I feel like I've learned a lot about myself and

I know a lot of my friends have learned about themselves just from people sharing on the internet like I've done I did like a solo episode just me talking about like first trimester stuff and how I was feeling and I have actually never received so many messages even still and it was like over a month ago, just from women being like, I've never heard someone like talk about it like this before. And it's it's just really important that we do that. And I feel like lucky that kind of like you said, like you, like having the mindset of like you were given lupus to like, you know,

have this platform and to talk about it and to share about it. And that's such, that's such an amazing mindset. Thank you. To have. So I'm proud of you for having that. What advice would you give? women or men, people out there listening that are feeling similar to how you have felt multiple times in the past stuck trying to advocate for themselves, but not being heard.

I would say don't give up because you know your body better than a doctor who spends 20 minutes with you, who's late to the appointment. Like you're showing up on time. You're living with yourself every day. And they walk in after making you wait 30 minutes and they're like, oh, you're fine. Like they're never going to know. Like they're looking at labs. They're a good doctor will look at labs and then they'll look at your symptoms and piece it together.

But a lot of doctors don't do that unfortunately. And so you know yourself better than anyone else does. You're your biggest fan. You're your biggest advocate. And you just have to don't give up on yourself. Like you know. And if you know, then keep pushing. Yeah.

See a different doctor if you have to. If they're blowing you off, like go to a different doctor. Like what's stopping you? you know yeah that's so good yeah that's great i love all of that um still being in postpartum i'm curious um if there are any um parts of yourself that you're rediscovering or maybe protecting more now as mom as k as a woman is there anything that after you know having your baby six months ago you're relearning about yourself or maybe since your diagnosis, like maybe you're going into how you approach life a little differently, like

protecting a little part of yourself differently. Yeah, I think before, I didn't put myself, I didn't care about myself enough. Everything, like my children are my world and they're obviously like the top of my my world and my life. But like I said earlier, like they have to have a mentally stable mom. And I think I, especially going through this second pregnancy, I've really tried to prioritize like my mental health, making sure that I'm a good parent for them. At the end of the day, everything I do is for them. But also like just caring about myself. Like there's this trend going around that's like getting my pink back. I don't know if you've seen that. But I think so many moms, we just, we we put so much into our children that we forget that. We, that we forget that.

we're also living this life for the first time. And this is the only life we get. Like, I think about that all the time with my parents. I'm like, they did their best and they're still doing their best. They're living this year of life for the first time. And, you know, you never get these years back. Like, you really have to soak all of it in and just, like, think about yourself too. I guess. I guess that's like my biggest thing is also caring about myself more. Yeah. I love that. Um, last little, I'm obsessed with these baby sounds that are Oh my gosh. She's literally going crazy out there.

No, I've literally, I doubt that the mic is picking it up. She's found her voice, so she likes to scream. I'm obsessed with it. So it's literally my favorite thing. I'm loving it. It's good practice for me hearing the baby sounds and getting used to it. Last little thing I want to talk about. Is your brand that you recently launched?

Can you tell our lemon drops a little bit about it? Yes. So I recently launched the brand, Hey New, which is Hey, nutrition. We started with protein bars. So we, with hopes to expand into other like nutrition, like we're also looking at doing like a daily gummy. Those are like really in right now. People love the easy, breezy, like just like. I love, I love a chewable. You know what I mean? Just like to be able to take and it tastes good, you know. So that's kind of like without saying it, but we are kind of like working on that right now. But we just, I really wanted something because having

Lupus, like, I'm not going to claim that I'm the best eater. Like, I eat things in moderation that are not probably the best for me and I could do without. But I really struggled finding, like, a protein bar that was good for me and didn't make me feel like bloated and, like, flared. I feel like there's so, like, so many protein bars taste like candy bars. Like, they're not good for you. People think that because it says protein on it, it's good for you. That doesn't, that's not true. Um, but then it was like on the opposite, there would be protein bars that were good for you, but they tasted horrible. Yeah.

Um, so that was kind of like what inspired this was that I really wanted something that tastes a good, but was healthy. And I think it tastes good. Um, it's inspired by my protein ball recipe, actually. So I would make protein balls because I didn't like like any protein bars on the market that were good for you. Um, and I would have so many people that were like, you know, I want your protein bar or ball recipe. So I was like, what if we just like use this like recipe, this idea and like make it

into a bar? And that's kind of where that came from. But I just, I also felt like a lot of the bars on the market were so like they market towards people in the gym. They market towards like bodybuilders and people who are super, super fit. And not everybody is like going to the gym every day and like trying to, you know, have. We're not gains his life over. Yeah, like 0% body fat. Like a lot of people just need something in the middle of the day or when they're dropping their kids off at school and they forgot breakfast or on their airplane, you know, kids. Like I wanted the bars to be soft enough, but also you wouldn't feel guilty giving them to your kids. Yes.

So my whole motto with with these bars is that they're inclusive to everybody. And in order to make them inclusive to everybody, we made them dairy-free, gluten-free, vegan. They're free of the top nine allergens. There's no sugar alcohols, no stevia. A lot of people don't like stevia. I personally think it tastes gross. Yeah. And I feel like it also like upsets a lot of people's stomach.

And then, you know, just making it taste good, but healthy. So we had to make it inclusive to everybody. And I feel like we really accomplished that. I'm really excited. We're about to drop our, so we've done one launch and it sold out in under 24 hours, which we did not anticipate. And we're going to double like our, we actually are doing another run in like a week and a half. Or no, a week from now.

So when this is live, there will be another. Yeah, there will be another launch. Well, the bars will be made. We're launching like a few days later. Yeah. But this next one, we doubled. And we're going to keep doubling as long as everything's doing good. And we have some new flavors that we're about to bring out.

But we did tweak this second launch, like the second batch. like the second batch is even better. So like the first one, I felt like we pushed the vegan bar space to its max. Like if you're going to add sweetness, like you have to take something else out. Like you have a 55 grand bar. You're going to have to like, it's like playing jenga. And it's very hard to make it good and like healthy and taste good without like, like you have to sacrifice somewhere. For sure. And I didn't like that idea. I was like, I don't like sacrificing. And I did feel like there could be improved. with my first run. So the second time, so we went up to Utah the other day, and we spent an entire day

with our food scientist. And I was just like testing, like, the proteins by themselves. We found out that our protein we originally were using the specific pea protein, was like drying out our bars. And it was supposedly the best protein on the market, like pea protein. And I tried it next to the one that we ended up going with. And you could tell just visually looking at them that the protein we originally used, it was more expensive and it was better but it wasn't it was like soaking up all like you could

just see it was like dry compared so we made like little tweaks we ended up upping the fiber lowering the sugar but making it a little more sweet so I was like I wish we would have done this with the first launch but it's kind of cool because we have like our whole community is on like we're bringing them on the journey with us yeah um you know no brand is perfect the first time it runs And I think listening to your community and seeing like what they felt about the bars, what they'd like to see, I think that's so important. So that's kind of what we did. And I'm really excited. I love that. I need to try them because I've been on the protein journey too. I feel like just especially being pregnant. I'm trying to like make sure I am getting enough protein. And also I want to like have food that's filling. That's good for me because I consume so much food right now. That's okay. It's fuel. You need to be doing that for your baby. Yeah.

I love that. Okay, let's head into our last little segment. It's called Lemon 7. Seven questions, you could amplify them or if you have a story to tell, feel pretty sure. Number one is what movie or song title best describes your mental health today? I think the pursuit of happiness. I love that. Because I feel like my life lately, there's been so many things that have made me feel like I

want to give up and like it's not working out my health is one of them like my body's like nope like I'm not gonna feel good today and I think I just have to um I just like tell myself like I just got to keep going and I feel like that movie really like it kind of like gives that it's like he keeps you know trying despite all the challenges so I feel like that's it's a good one that's special number two is how open are you with people in your life? when struggling? With Taylor, I'm very open. I've learned to be very open, like I said earlier. But with other people in my life, I don't tend to share as much, especially online. I'm very private, despite how much we share online. But I just feel like people aren't going to get it a lot of times.

And maybe I need to be more open with people. But I feel like my biggest supporter is Tay. And he's, he's my best friend. So he knows me. He gets me. He knows when I'm upset. So yeah, definitely with him, I am. Number three is if you could follow three social media accounts, what would they be? Oh my goodness. See, I don't consume content a lot right now. Yeah. So I don't know like a specific like Instagram account.

But I think I would definitely want somebody who like makes me feel like I can keep going. So somebody that helps me feel motivated, like a motivational type. account and then let me think somebody who makes me laugh because I think that's super important at the end of the day like you have to have like you have to laugh you have to enjoy you know like a good comedy show a movie is always good you know so one that makes me laugh and then probably family like a family member to stay in touch with my family that's sweet number four is what is your favorite form of self-care skin care for sure I need to try that oil you were talking about or whatever the serum yeah you do you should try it

I have one here if you want it. Well, no, I'm not going to do this. No, I have like a million at the house. I have one with me. It's just, it's my new. So I did like two sizes. Okay. And I just dropped my travel.

It's like travel sites. It's to give people not the three month commitment if they just want to try it. And it's like a month and a half commitment. But I have it. I just opened it yesterday. Okay. Well, if you're not going to use it, I might take it. No, you should.

Because I've been trying to find, I've been trying to find skincare things that are also pregnancy safe that also agree with my skin. So that's been really fun. It's a good one. Fun for me. Number five is what is the most misunderstood thing about you? Probably that I feel fine because I'm doing a lot of things, but I don't actually feel fine. Just because I'm like showing up, it doesn't mean that I'm actually fine. Like I'm just pushing myself to the limit a lot of times. And I think that's, that's definitely the one that I get

most often is like, oh, she's fine on trips. Like she's fine to go do this. I'm like, guys, like, I do it when I need to do it. Like, that's why when I'm home, I don't. do anything. I'm on the couch, like, because I pushed myself for the last week and a half, you know, yeah, for sure that. I love that answer so much, especially because people are so quick to leave comments and things and have opinions on social media. And we also forget that it's important for us to do that, to push ourselves to do things. Because, you know, I'm very thankful that I have the type of personality where I am stubborn and I'm like, even if I'm not feeling it, I'm like, no, I'm going to do this.

Like, I know I'm just going to, I'm not going to feel good, but I'm going to do it. Yeah. And I'm so thankful because, yes, like, especially now being pregnant, my body, I'm learning that I can't expect my body to do the same things that I would not pregnant. But it's just, I'm so thankful that I push myself. Like, I've never, I've never gone to an event and been upset that I did. And even though I'm like, I don't want to have to drive. I don't want to get ready.

I don't like, what if there's no one I want to mingle with? Like, every single time and every time I get in the. car and I'm like about to leave to go do something. I'm like, do I really want to do this? And then I come home and I'm like on the phone to tell. I'm like, there. So-and-so was there and then this, this, this. So I just have to remind myself that every time. Like I need to push myself to do it even if I'm not feeling good. Yeah. I feel like it's a really good way to show your children too. Like my girls are going to grow up and they're going to see like we don't just, we don't give up. Number six is who's at the most positive impact on your mental health? My kids. My kids.

because at the end of the day, no matter how bad I feel mentally or physically, they remind me who, they remind me why I do it. They remind me what really matters, you know, at the end of the day, like, my family matters the most. So, okay, last question. If you can go back to one moment in your life, what moment would that be? And what would you say to yourself? So this one's going to be a little, like, oh, I'm not going to cry. probably Tay and I had like a controversy a few years ago. And I think in that moment, I felt like that was it. And like it would never get better. And I think I would just tell myself that at the end of the day, like, nobody knows us the way we know us. And nobody will ever get it, you know, because they didn't live, they don't live our life.

and as long as we know the truth, that's all that matters. I told myself it wasn't going to cry. But yeah, I would just say that, like, I would tell myself that I got through it and that it gets better. And that at the end of the day, like, I'm going to have so many people that support us at the end of the day. Like, they don't care, you know? They support us. They know that people say things online. People do things online that are mean.

people that know you do things that are mean to you because they don't like that you have anything going on that's good anymore. So yeah, I think I would just tell myself to like stay strong and like not what it gets to me because I was very mental, like not. That was probably the lowest point in my life was in that little era. Yeah. Well, I think I've learned so much about strength from you today and especially not even knowing that that was something that you've experienced. And I have friends that have experienced

probably had similar experiences too. It's very hard. Controversies and things online. But I am just so proud of you for like showing up for advocating for yourself for showing your kids like what strength looks like as a mom, especially because you have girls. And like, I think that that's just really special. And you should be so proud of yourself for literally like everything. And also like literally starting a brand like on top of everything that you have going on. Like the fact that you did that too is really awesome. It's my newest baby.

So I love that. Well, I hope you leave here like proud of yourself and like really just taking a moment to like take that in. Yeah. I'm glad because I was having the same moment the other day. I was like, I don't know if I can do any of this. like the travel and just it's a lot when you don't feel good. But I'm glad. It's like you said, like now that I've done it, I'm so glad that I pushed myself to do this. So yeah, thank you for having me. I just feel so honored that I got to talk with you today.

I love it. I'm not going. Thanks for coming.