The Squeeze - Madison Marilla: Embracing Every Part of Me
Episode Date: April 22, 2026In this week’s episode, Tay sits down with Madison Marilla and her dad, Brennan Marilla, from Love on the Spectrum! Madison shares the full story of her proposal, including the special mome...nt her fiancé Tyler White asked her parents for their blessing, and what that experience meant to all of them. Madison and her dad open up about already being fans of the show before ever being contacted, what it felt like when the opportunity came their way, and why they ultimately decided to join. They also share more about Madison’s autism diagnosis, the early signs they noticed, and what that journey looked like for their family, including the therapies that supported her along the way. Madison talks about her specific experience with autism, what helps her feel calm when she’s overwhelmed, and the stigmas she hopes to break. She also shares her favorite part of herself, something she still dreams of doing, what makes her feel most proud, and the advice she would give to others!Be sure to follow Madison https://instagram.com/madison_marilla/!Shop Madison’s jewelry here: https://madizenusa.com/To email us your questions or share your story, you can reach out to lautner.thesqueezepodcast@gmail.comBe sure to rate, review, and follow the podcast so you don't miss an episode! Plus, follow us on all of our socials:The SqueezeInstagram: https://instagram.com/thesqueeze/TikTok: https://tiktok.com/@thesqueezepodcastTay LautnerInstagram: https://instagram.com/taylautner/TikTok: https://tiktok.com/@mrstaylautnerAmazon Storefront https://urlgeni.us/amazon/FDXj7 Taylor LautnerInstagram: https://instagram.com/taylorlautner/TikTok: https://tiktok.com/@taylorlautnerTo learn more from The Lemons Foundation, follow https://instagram.com/lemonsbytay/ and visit https://lemonsbytay.comEpisode Sponsors:Go to tempomeals.com/SQUEEZE for 60% off your first box.Go to drinkspark.com and use code SQUEEZE at checkout for 30% off and free shipping.Text SQUEEZE to 64000 to get 20% off all IQBAR products, plus FREE shipping. Message and data rates may apply.Visit yasso.com/SQUEEZE to enter and upgrade your freezer! Find full giveaway details, rules, and regulations. Yasso awarded as product coupons. No purchase necessary. Open to 50 US/DC, 18+. Ends 11:59pm ET 4/30. Rules: yasso.com/SQUEEZEShop new drops every Tuesday at lululemon.com.Let yourself run, lift, fail, try, and go. Explore Peloton Cross Training Tread+ at onepeloton.com.Thanks to today’s sponsor, Ogee: A higher standard for beauty. Go to ogee.com/TAY and use code TAY to get 15% off certified organic makeup that performs like luxury.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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The following podcast is a dear media production.
Hi, I am Madison from Love on the Spectrum.
I don't know if you know this, but we've been trying to plan this for a really long time.
And I want to extend a congratulations.
You can't believe it.
Will you marry me?
Yes, they're.
I had no idea our families were hiding in the bushes.
Oh, my gosh.
He tricked me this whole time.
He got you.
Show the ring.
Let's see it.
Now I'm happy.
Love on the Spectrum reached out to me when they did.
What was that like for you when they reached out?
First reaction, my first instinct was, let's not do this.
Glad to be back, Kean.
Kean is an absolute genius how he has struck this balance between entertaining.
It's funny.
I'll find my prints.
I'll find my prints.
But it doesn't make fun.
Not if the glass slipper fits, but if the cowboy boot fits right.
I want to talk a little bit about when you found out about her diagnosis.
I was diagnosed in 1999 with what was called classic autism.
Okay.
I was also diagnosed with developmental delays.
How old were you then?
Two years old.
My parents explain it to me as there's some stuff that's easy for you.
and some stuff that's harder for you. Autism is a journey, non-disorder. It's meant to make you.
It is not meant to break you. And there's so many gifts that come along with autism.
Okay. I am so excited because the time has finally come. I have been waiting to do this episode
and now to release this episode because I am just, I'm literally giddy to share it with you all.
I've been trying to plan this episode for a very long time. And I finally worked out,
because our guests ended up being out in L.A.
And I was also here at the same time.
So we made it work.
But you guys know how much I love Love on the Spectrum.
We have had Abby and her mom on and that was such a special experience for me.
And this week's guest is Madison and Marilla and her dad Brennan.
Madison has become a fan favorite on Love on the Spectrum for her warmth, her honesty,
and being just totally unapologetically herself.
She's a neurodivergent creator who has been open about living with autism, ADHD, and OCD.
And she uses her platform to show what that actually looks like day to day, both the challenges, and the joy of it.
Getting to sit down with Madison and her dad was such a treat because getting to hear how Madison has gone through life and what she's been through and what she's endured and how she's grown through her autism and her challenges.
and it's just really cool to hear from Madison herself speak about what she's been through and how
she feels and what makes her special. And it's so cool to see the joy that life brings her.
Madison also opened up to me about being engaged to Tyler and just how sweet of a human
he is and their relationship. And if she even thought she would ever get engaged and married
in what this show has been able to bring to her life. And it's so,
sweet to hear the way she talks about Tyler and their relationship because they are truly such a special pair.
And getting to hear from her dad as well what it was like as a parent to having your kid be diagnosed with autism and what that was like for him and his wife to walk through with their child.
And it is just so inspiring.
Their relationship is so sweet.
Her dad is such a joy.
And Madison brings such light.
It was so special to just learn what makes her unique.
and what makes her her. She even made me a little bracelet after, which was so excited. I've literally
had it on since. And I'm going to leave a link down below for you guys to check out all of her jewelry
that she makes. She's such an advocate for autism awareness. And it's so special. Everything
that she's been doing even before this show dating back to junior high and high school.
I know that y'all are going to just absolutely love Madison and her dad in this entire episode.
and I'm just so excited to finally share it with you.
Welcome to the squeeze.
Thank you.
I am so excited to have you and your dad here today.
I don't know if you know this,
but we've been trying to plan this for a really long time.
But we live so far apart.
Yes.
But ironically, I grew up in Santa Rosa, California, ironically.
Oh, wow.
If only you lived there, we could have done this sooner.
But it's okay.
It's finally happening.
Yes, California, Massachusetts, now Florida.
Oh, wow.
Which one was your favorite?
I loved living in all three places.
says. Okay. Fair enough. Yes. Um, well, I'm excited to have you. And I want to extend a congratulations
because you're engaged. Yes. Oh my gosh. Show the ring. Let's see it. Oh, my gosh. What color are those
smaller stones next to it? Yeah, they're rubies because my cowboy sweet art Tyler. He knows red is my
favorite color. Oh, it is. Okay. Did he pick out the ring? Did you help him design it? No, I did not. He
did it all himself. Oh, wow. Props to him. Yes. My husband needed help with mine. I'm not wearing.
mine right now, but he had a little help from me. So that's good for him. What was the proposal like?
Can you tell me about it? Yes. So it was exactly on our, it was one year later on our anniversary,
July 15th. Okay. And I didn't know what to expect. All I knew was it was going to be a surprise.
The whole day was going to be a surprise. Okay. I had no idea what was going on. And then,
then there was the scene. And then when my parents and Tyler's
when my parents and Tyler's parents,
we were all living dinner at Tyler's house,
then Tyler asked to pull my parents aside,
and then they were talking for like over an hour.
Oh, wow.
I had no idea what this could be about,
but then I figured out looking back on that day,
he was probably asking them for their blessing.
Wow.
And that part got cut.
Okay.
But it happened.
It happened.
It happened.
It was a really sweet moment.
Yes.
Yes.
But it didn't fit the flow of the show.
I think Keen wanted to leave the suspense until the very end.
so that I think that it made sense to edit out, but it's a, Tyler was really, really sweet.
We had a great conversation.
So maybe it'll make the outtakes one day.
Yes.
He asked both my mom and my dad.
Yeah.
And so he's a great Christian Southern gentleman, which is one thing I love about him.
So special.
And we're both very strong in our faith.
Hmm.
And then I remember that morning, like I woke up.
I didn't even know what to, what to expect, what was going on that day.
And then I find out, like Tyler's,
like come back to sunken gardens one year later and that's all I knew.
Yeah.
And then the love on the spectrum,
low on the spectrum production drives me down there.
Literally did I know Tyler had Christmas in July planned on the wedding lawn,
literally where we first met and first laid eyes in each other.
And literally did I know like we're literally talking on the wedding lawn and I had no idea
our families were hiding in the bushes this whole time.
Oh my gosh.
And then Tyler's like, oh, we're exchanging all these gifts to each other under the tree for our anniversary.
Like Tyler had given me gifts to remind us of like our early dates.
Aw.
Universal line dance, line dancing, sunken gardens, the beach, all our early dates.
Then I gave him homemade Zen buddies, homemade ornaments, homemade bracelets, like everything I make.
And then I gave him a button up that had my business logo custom made on it.
And then our day we met on it July 15th, 2024.
Yeah.
And then literally Tyler's like, Tyler's like, open the mailbox.
And I'm like, what's in there?
He's like, wait and see.
Then I read the letter.
And I kept tearing up and kept tearing up.
And then he finally popped the question.
Wow.
Were you just so surprised?
I was so surprised.
But, and then looking back that night, like he kind of was giving subtle clues throughout
the season.
Oh, he was.
Like the Valentine's date, I kind of was thinking it would get.
pop because he's like, I have a major surprise for you.
I kind of figure that could be it.
Yeah.
Had you guys talked about getting engaged or was this just a total surprise to you?
Like, we had spoken about it.
Like, what does it mean to have a ring on your finger?
Yeah.
We'd spoken about it like here and there because we were spending so much time together.
For six months, I was commuting back and forth from Plant City to, from my parents' house
and Bradenton to Plant City.
Yeah.
After I was displaced from the hurricane.
Oh, okay.
What was that conversation like for you when he asked for your blessing?
First of all, it was really, it was really sweet.
We had a nice, in the, in the, on the show, in this season of the show, there was a, there
was a dinner, you know, kind of like a meet and greet with Tyler's parents.
We had met them before.
We had seen them a bunch of times.
But this was the first time we'd kind of actually gone to their home and sat down
with them.
and we were talking about our children and how cool it was that they'd gotten together and found
each other.
And anyway, we had a nice interaction.
It was a lot of fun.
And then as Jenny and I are leaving Madison's mother, my wife Jenny, as we're leaving
their house, you know, Tyler kind of grabs us as we're walking out the door.
And Tyler's father, Tim, had Madison distracted.
How did he distract?
So Tim, Tim had me going to the man cave and he kept me in the man cave.
Oh, my gosh.
Tim just, Tim tricked me into Tyler talking to my.
parents about their upcoming Alaska trip. Oh my gosh. He tricked me this whole time. He got you.
He got you. Yes. So Tyler, Tyler was really sweet and he, you know, he was very gentle. He's a very
gentle person. And, and so, you know, we, I could kind of tell, I kind of had the vibe of what was
coming. I could tell this time he wasn't going to ask if he could take it at Universal Studios.
Right? Right. I knew this time it was going to be the real question. And, you know, he asked, you know,
if he could marry Madison.
And I think, you know, Jenny and I had a nice conversation with him about why do you want to
marry her?
Do you feel like you're ready?
Do you feel like the two of you are ready for marriage?
You still have a lot of personal growth to do.
You're still learning how to have a relationship.
And the other question I had was about, you know, children, you know, are you guys aligned on
this?
Because Madison doesn't feel like she's, you know, going to be.
ready to have children probably maybe ever.
Yeah.
And just kind of wanted to make sure that he understood that these are bigger issues.
Going on dates and just having fun is one thing, and that's important.
But some of these other bigger issues need to be discussed seriously before they actually
get married.
And so we had a good conversation about that.
And then we told him that we thought that he was a great fit for her and that we were
blessed to have him in our life and for Madison to find.
him. And we said, we're giving you the green light, Tyler. And then we had an idea of when he wanted
to bring her to sunken gardens, what was going to happen. Yeah. So typically when Madison
films for the show, Sean or Kean or one of the folks on the production will actually go pick her up.
She doesn't live, Madison doesn't live with us. She lived with us. She lived with this temporarily because we
were in temporary housing because our house got destroyed in Hurricane Helene.
So sorry.
Jenny and I live on-
And my apartment got destroyed in Milton.
Oh, wow.
Yeah, yeah.
We had quite a, quite a week with two of the biggest hurricanes in Florida history.
And our house flooded on Anna Maria Island.
So we had to live in a condo and then Madison had to move out of the apartment in St.
Petersburg where you see her in season three.
Yeah.
So we were all kind of like crammed in there together.
And so we, you know, we kind of had to.
you know, we, Madison was brought over to Sucking Gardens by the production staff.
So Jenny and I gave us an opportunity to kind of sneak over and kind of hide.
And we kind of knew what was about to happen.
So, and Tyler's parents did the same thing.
We're all like hiding in the, you know, in the bushes and trying to see,
trying to see what was happening without ruining the surprise because we didn't want them to see us.
Yeah.
And then we, you know, we heard it happen.
I didn't see it happen until yesterday when I watched the show.
Oh my gosh.
And it was beautiful. I mean, it was very emotional to watch. Yeah. And I was so proud of them. But we kind of popped out of the bushes afterwards and gave him a big hug. And we were so proud of them.
It's a special moment. Did you ever think you would get engaged? Did you want to get married? Or?
I never ever thought that because before love on the spectrum, dating was not even on my radar.
Okay. Are you happy about it now? Now I'm happy. Now I'm happy. Love on the spectrum reached out to me when they did.
Yeah.
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What was that like for you when they reached out? I mean, both of you can answer this question.
Yeah. Yes. I'll let you go first, Massachusetts. So I was living in Massachusetts,
and the show reached out to the Life program that I was a part of. Okay. But the timing wasn't
right. And then a year later, I was living in Florida. They reached back out to me,
and the timing was right, and I became a cast member. Okay. Was that exciting to you?
you were you nervous?
Like did you,
did you know what,
did you watch the show,
I guess?
I was a,
I was a huge fan of seasons one and season two.
And I've even watched the Australian version.
So I thought it would be very cool to be on the show and it would open me up to dating.
Yeah.
Even when they reached out to me initially about season two.
Okay.
I was opened up,
especially watching Abby and David because Abby and I are just very similar.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And you know we've had Abby on.
Interest stems.
Yeah.
Yeah, you and Abby are similar.
She sat in the exact chair as you.
Yes.
Just another similarity.
And we have the same interest in Disney.
Oh, you do?
Yes.
Is Belle your favorite princess?
Yes, Belle, yes, Belle is my favorite.
Okay.
That's one of my favorite Barbies right here.
I feel like you look like her.
I do, like with her brown hair and her green eyes.
And I love to wear my hair like Belle quite a lot, half back with a bow or a flower.
So pretty.
She's my favorite.
I love.
When I was little, it was snow white.
That's a good, that's a good choice.
There's so many good choices.
Mine's Rapunzel.
I don't look anything.
I look like Rapunzel after she got her haircut.
But what was that like for you when Netflix reached out?
Couldn't believe it at first.
I mean, you know, our entire fan, we were huge fans of the show.
I mean, we were watching the Australian version before the U.S. version ever happened.
We loved Michael.
I love the guy that was into dinosaurs.
Yes, and Mark.
Oh, yeah, Mark.
And Maddie.
Oh, yeah.
We were just...
And Jody Rogers.
Exactly.
Yeah, like, I remember all their cast names.
And on the U.S. version, of course, Abby, and Danny and James are now friends of mine.
And Connor and Tanner, of course.
They're Connor, Tanner, and Abby are three of my good friends.
That's awesome.
So we love the show.
Yeah.
Big fans.
You know, when Madison was diagnosed many years ago, there was just nothing on autism.
Yeah.
And if there was a show.
show like Love on the Spectrum out, it would have been amazing for us to watch that and just see
what are the possibilities? You know, I think its show gives people a lot of hope. Yeah. And you get to
see what they're really like. And everyone's very, very different. So we were huge fans and we had a lot
of respect for the show. And I think we, you know, we were, we were super intrigued and, and
it was exciting. But I can tell you, my first reaction, my first instinct was, let's not do this.
Okay.
I wasn't sure if it would be good for Madison.
I wasn't sure if I wanted us to put our family out there in the public eye like that.
And I wasn't sure about security.
I wasn't sure if this was the right thing to do.
Jenny was a little bit more kind of level-headed about it.
By the way, I got over that about a day or two days after we really kind of thought about it.
I think we both agreed that, first of all, Madison wanted to do it.
First and foremost, we just never thought Masson would actually date someone.
She never really showed a ton of interest.
She wanted to go to dances in high school.
And, you know, she had a couple of facilitated kind of dates, you know, when she was in the life program.
Yes.
But she didn't show a strong interest in dating.
So we, but Madison's huge fans, she's a huge fan of shows like The Bachelor and all these
dating shows. So I think she has learned, you know, about dating and about, you know, relationships
by watching all these, all these shows. Yeah. And, and, and so we thought that, we thought that,
first of all, maybe she'll find somebody on the show. Maybe this is the way she'll find somebody.
Because we kind of had resigned, we had resigned to the fact that she, you know, might have guy
friends, but she is never really going to be aggressively pursuing it. Yeah. And so we thought,
first of all, maybe she'll find someone. Maybe this will, maybe they'll actually find someone
with her. It'll be like amazing. Secondly, Madison has a, we just felt like this would give
Madison a platform to be inspirational to other people on the spectrum and other families that have
people on the spectrum. Yeah. That's really important to Madison. If you kind of look at some of
the big accomplishments Madison's had in her life, it's always been about mentoring kids with autism
or creating awareness.
She created the autism awareness club at her high school.
And, you know, I think having a platform and being inspirational gives Madison a real sense of purpose.
Yeah.
And that's really, really important to her.
And we thought maybe this will give Madison an opportunity to really feel great about herself.
You know, maybe this is the reason.
Maybe Madison has an opportunity now to, you know, to educate others and to inspire others.
To give others hope.
Yeah.
I think the other thing was, you know, we, having watched the show and really studied it, we, without knowing Kean and his producers, I think we just felt like we could trust them.
I was just going to say, sure, because there was already, the show had already been out. Like, there was, you know, some safety in regard to you, you've seen multiple seasons of this, you know, how, you know, Madison, how she would maybe fit into it and what that would look like. So I'm sure that, you know.
still I would have that same fear, but some, maybe that's why I only took you a day to
get over that part of it. Yeah, I mean, it's, it's amazing. I mean, Kean is an absolute genius
how he has struck this balance between he has a show that's entertaining. It's funny. Yeah.
It's really funny, but it doesn't make fun. You know, it's, it's very sweet, but it's not
like a sappy after-school special. No drama. Yeah. You know, it's, it's educational without being
boring. I mean, he's, he's really struck a really nice balance in the way he casts and,
and finds these amazing people to follow their journeys and the way he shoots it and the
cinematography. Everything about it, we just thought was really high quality and we thought we could
trust before we even kind of knew who they were. That was so well said. Everything you just said,
I'm like, yes, that's why. Yeah. I think that's why people love the show so much. It's like,
you know, me specifically, I don't have anyone in my family that has autism, but I'm so drawn to the
show and I love it so much because it is so endearing and it's so kindhearted and it is educational
because I feel like I've learned so much just from watching the show. Yeah. I mean, I think they have
done more. This is, I, you know, I would say if I had if I had changed part of my answer from
from previously, I would say that this show has probably done more to help people accept and
understand people on the spectrum than anything else that's ever been out there. I mean, when Madison
was diagnosed, there was, we had Rain Man was what was a point of reference. There was really nothing
out there.
That was only one in 500 people were diagnosed back then and like an ABA literally
had to be paid out of pocket now.
Like ABA goes goes through insurance now.
Oh, wow.
Yeah, yeah.
It's a financial burden for a lot of people, certainly us in the early days.
But we just felt like, you know, this could be a net, net positive for her.
Yeah.
And maybe she'll help other people by being on the show.
And so it's just been a blessing that she's being able to be a part of this.
and also to strike such a chord with people.
Yeah.
I want to talk a little bit about when you found out about her diagnosis.
You kind of touched on it a little bit.
I was diagnosed in 1999 with what was called classic autism back then.
Okay.
I was also diagnosed with developmental delays.
How old were you then?
Two years old.
Okay.
What were some of the first signs that you were seeing that maybe made you question?
So Jenny, being the intuitive woman that she is and reading,
probably the same book you're reading right now.
Yep.
What's you expect when you're expecting
and then what you're expecting
in the first year.
You know,
she was monitoring her so closely, right?
And, you know, she felt like,
oh, she's missing some speech
and she's, you know, missing some eye contact
and she's doing a lot of parallel play with children.
Like she'll be on the floor with a child,
but she was not playing,
she's not interacting with a child.
She's kind of just next to the child.
I see.
And of course, me being the,
the, you know, the guy that I am, I'm like, come on, I think, look at her.
She's beautiful.
She's so sweet.
She's adorable.
Look at her.
There's nothing wrong with her, you know.
And then, but Jenny noticed that, you know, maybe there's something off here.
Maybe she's missing some, she's missing some speech.
Yeah.
And so when Madison was about 18 months, we got her into speech therapy.
And after, I can't remember how many months it was, three or four months of speech
therapy, the therapist said, you know,
maybe you should consider taking her to the kind of the state, it was the state of the county
kind of developmental evaluation center because she's showing some signs that she might be
autistic.
And again, that back then there was, that term was like, not a lot of people knew what that
meant.
So we took her to the, we took her to the center and, you know, there was a team of psychologists
and other health care professionals.
You know, we dropped Madison off and they spent a couple of hours with her.
And they came out at the end and said, you know, we think, we think that Madison has some form of autism.
And they handed us like a pamphlet.
What is autism?
We started doing a lot of research.
We found, you know, a couple of doctors around the country that specialized in autism.
Pretty, pretty amazing they were doing that back then.
Yeah.
We scheduled calls with them.
We reached out to them.
We just decided that for a while, I was in denial for a while.
Yeah.
And then there was kind of this period of devastation and disappointment.
You know, you don't want your child to not be able to talk or not to have, I mean,
I just worried about a quality of life.
I just, you just want them to have friends and, you know, to be in love and to, you know,
go to college and, you know, all the things that you want, you know, for your child.
And, you know, it's, it's depressing to think that they may not be able to get that.
And this is, again, this is back, I say this in front of Madison because obviously there's a happy ending here.
Yeah.
And she's come so far, but back then that's the way we felt.
And I think most parents probably feel that way when they first get the diagnosis.
So we kind of went from, you know, kind of denial to devastation to just determination and acceptance.
Yeah.
But I think the best thing that we did was we found AIDS.
We hired AIDS.
Back then, the insurance didn't pay for us.
It was all out of pocket.
ABA therapy, speech therapy, O.T.
Yeah, all of those things.
And so, you know, we tried a lot of things.
But therapy was really where we started to see real progress.
Yeah.
And I'm talking about we had a wonderful, we had a wonderful therapist.
And we were living in Charlotte, North Carolina at the time.
We had wonderful therapists there that got on the floor with her, and everybody just worked really hard.
The amazing thing about Madison, what makes Madison so special is Madison is really strong-willed,
and she is really achievement-focused.
She really wants to achieve things.
She always had the greatest spirit, which really helped a lot, even when she was probably super confused about why am I doing this stuff.
Then we moved to California.
I had an opportunity career-wise to move to California in Northern California, Sonoma County, Santa Rosa.
and it was a great career move, but one of the main reasons why we did this is because at the time, North Carolina was a little bit behind and their services, but California was a little bit more advanced at the time.
So when we moved to Santa Rosa, we were super lucky for Madison to be mainstreamed in the elementary school, and she had a one-on-one aide.
She had one-on-one aides, and they're wonderful.
She had wonderful aides and teachers and mentors that were super helpful for her.
And so, you know, from there that kind of the journey began to really see if we could, you know,
if we could help Madison overcome a lot of these obstacles.
And here she is today.
Yeah.
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How was it for you growing up?
Did you feel that your brain maybe worked different?
differently from others?
Yes.
So, so I had no idea it was autistic until around like,
around the,
until the fourth grade.
Okay.
That was when I learned,
like my parents explain it to me is there's some stuff that's easy for you
and some stuff that's harder for you.
And it came with one word and the one word is autism.
And how I,
and how they explained it to me is the fact that you're able to memorize
how to say hello in 50 languages,
know the whole entire Disney dictionary.
No, an American, nowadays, no an American girl, know when American girl dolls were released.
Yeah.
Know all the presence in order.
The fact that was able to know all the states and capitals and kindergarten are my strengths.
But back then, I was not very social.
It was harder for me to make friends.
It took me longer to ride a bike.
It took me longer to tie my shoes.
It took me longer to learn how to swim.
And it all came with one word, and that one word was autism.
How was that for you growing up?
Did you like doing your therapies, your OT, your speech therapy?
Did you enjoy that?
Or was that, would you get upset that you had to do that?
I would say looking back, I enjoyed it.
Yeah.
Like, I've always enjoyed my social skills groups.
Even when I was a teenager and a young adult, I really looked forward to it.
Do you feel like other kids at school treated you differently because of your autism?
Or do you think they were pretty nice about it?
In elementary school, I was very accepted in elementary school because my age,
Megan, I'm so thankful for her because she constantly pushed me to hang around other kids.
She would be like, you're at lunch, do you want to hang out, sit with these friends or these
friends?
Rees is, you know, play this game with these friends or this game with these friends?
And she's like, who are we having over after school today?
Like, she constantly pushed me to be around other kids, and that's part of why I'm so outgoing.
But when I moved to Massachusetts from California in the eighth grade, I moved and no one
understood me. So I, so I had to deal with people bullying me. But then by the end of that,
at the end of that school year, I did do a, and I was doing my quarterly current event for my
U.S. history class. My special, I was, I sat down with my special ed teacher, Ms. Podreski,
because she was helping me with it. And she said, Madison, here's one about autism awareness
so you can educate your classmates. And then I did that current event. And then every kid in the
class raised their hand and had a question for me. Oh, wow.
And then people started to apologize.
In the following school year, I had my favorite mentor, Jess.
Okay.
And she told me these words, it's best to let yourself out.
Don't hold yourself in.
And then from there on, I started to educate all my classmates and all my peers about
autism.
And everyone started apologizing.
And that April, I did my first autism table in my high school.
And then my peers wanted to join the cause, which led to me starting the autism
Awareness Club.
That's awesome.
Did you have fun with that?
I really enjoyed doing the Autism Awareness Club.
We would do jewelry sales, bake sales.
We would do panels.
Yeah.
We would do information tables, car washes.
That's sweet.
Middle school is tough for anybody, right?
But that was a tough time for her because we, when we moved back to the East
Coast and we decided to move back there and, you know, and live in New England, when we, when
we moved, we decided to.
to, for her to repeat the grade. It was a nice, it was an opportunity to like repeat the grade. No one
knows her. It's not, you know, there's no stigma there. She's just going to, she was a little bit,
too, she was a little bit older for her, she was a little bit younger dad, yes. Already and then she
had developed no delays. So it was a little bit of a double whammy. So she repeated and, and, you know,
it was, it was a little bit of a rough experience at first. I mean, not, I mean, there were, most,
most kids were great. Okay. We're talking about a minority of kids. Yeah. And then when Madison
started to self-advocate for herself, this is where Mass. This is where Mass.
has a lot of really interesting self-awareness and strategies.
And again, she's had wonderful people that have helped her along the way.
But when Madison kind of had that speech to her classroom, was that the, was that the seventh grade, eighth grade?
That was end of eighth grade, Mr. Grassies class.
Those kids, when she made a speech about autism awareness, it was Autism Awareness Month, right?
Yes.
Yeah.
And she made that speech and she said, does anyone want to have any questions?
Every kid in the room raised their hand.
And they were like, why do you do this?
or why did, you know, what is it like?
And Madison just educated everybody.
And after that, like, every kid was sweet to her.
Yeah.
And then when she got the high school, she was like, well, that worked pretty good in middle
school.
And she got in high school.
And she started to continue to advocate for herself and started that club.
And, you know, the kids were really great to her in that community.
Yeah.
And I think it gave her a lot of confidence then to go on and go to college.
Yeah.
And do the same thing there.
And Madison just kind of finds a way to win people over.
Yeah.
You know, with her spirit.
And she's just so determined and, you know, she's super friendly.
And I think it's just, I think it's, it was, we were, we were lucky to live in that
community and to have those things happen.
For sure.
You know, it's not that easy for everybody, as you can imagine, you know.
And I think even when I was growing up, they were kids that I, were around me when I, you know,
that I went to school with.
And I was like, what is, you know, what's going on with this kid, you know, what's,
yeah, because you don't know.
Now when I look back, I go, gosh, that kid was probably on the spectrum.
Yeah.
That's what was going on.
But back then, you just didn't understand it.
For sure.
You know, thank God that, you know, again, these days that there's way more awareness and way
more acceptance.
Again, going back to the show and being a part of the show, we just feel so blessed to be
able to play a small role in that.
Yeah.
For our lemon drops, that's what we call our listeners.
For our lemon drops that are listening, could you maybe explain to them how your brain
is a little different than mine?
Yes.
As an autistic individual, I'm a black and white thing.
which means things are either one way or the other way.
Okay.
And also like also too when I do things, it's like a switch goes off.
Okay.
When I'm doing things for the first time, it's like it goes from one extreme to the other.
Okay.
It's like before love on the spectrum happened, I had zero interest in dating.
Got it.
And then when love on the spectrum reaches out to me, all of a sudden I have an interest
in dating.
And then Tyler and I were like boyfriend and girlfriend.
Yeah.
That's so true.
So it's like zero to 100 like that.
Yeah.
I know when Abby was on, we were talking about how she correlates numbers to colors and things like that.
That's David.
Oh, okay.
David does that?
David is synesthesia, but I'm someone who tends to categorize things a lot and theme things a lot.
Okay.
That's how my brain works.
Okay.
Could you give me an example of that?
Like, I also struggle with OCD.
Okay.
And for example, it's like if one thing is out of order, I get very upset.
Okay.
Like my jewelry has to be in a certain order.
It's like I have it organized by color.
I have it organized by theme.
And then my dolls too, it's like my princess barbies are all in a certain order by like
the year the movie was released.
Wow.
Like Snow White 1937 all the way to Oshah 2023.
And do you organize them all?
Yes.
Yes, I do.
And then all my other Barbies are like over here from like autistic Barbie to like Easter
Barbie Christmas Barbie.
Yeah.
And then my American girl dolls.
I'm like historical characters, girls of the year holiday.
Growing up when.
Was it hard for you to communicate sometimes?
Even now, do you feel like it's hard for you to communicate what you're thinking sometimes?
When I was a kid, I struggled to get my words out a lot and would tantrum.
Okay.
How do you feel now?
Do you feel like you can communicate for yourself?
I feel like I do a much better job at it now.
Yeah.
When you get overwhelmed, what helps you feel calm?
Helps me feel calm.
Like, I love to make jewelry.
I love to sew.
I love to draw and paint.
Okay.
I love to spend time with Tyler, spend time with my friends.
Yeah.
Volunteer in my church community.
Yeah.
I love to play with my sensory toys.
Like I love to watch Disney movies.
I love to watch MTV.
MTV?
Yes.
Like I really got into MTV.
MTV became a special interest to mine in the last year.
What do you watch on MTV?
80s, 90s, 2000s music videos all day.
All day.
The 80s music videos, 90s music videos,
2000 music videos.
is I could just watch it all day.
We finally have the same
love of 80s music.
It took me many, many years.
It just happened organically.
Like in the last year,
Madison just found an interest at it.
Because Jenny and I grew up
on the MTV era, you know?
So it's been fun for Madison.
Madison sometimes, you know,
I think sometimes you just find new interest
that kind of surprises.
I just feel like I find stuff like
it's just one day, like for so long,
for so long, all I knew is cartoons
and kids shows and Disney movies and just everything was animated.
And then I remember how nervous I was to watch my first adult movie with Tyler.
Okay.
I remember watching,
I remember Tyler invited me to watch Reagan with him.
Okay.
And I remember,
I'm like,
this is not a kid's movie.
I'm not going to like it.
But then my dad told me the day before,
he said,
you like history,
you like presidents.
So keep your mind open.
Yeah.
And then I,
and then I went to the movie with Tyler and
surprised myself.
Yeah.
And now I enjoy watching documentaries with him.
Oh, I love documentaries.
I love learning, so I love documentaries.
Madison loves history.
That makes one.
I can't, I haven't gotten, gotten into history.
I changed elementary schools a lot as a kid, so I feel like I missed.
Yeah.
I didn't get a lot of good, good history.
I grew up in Virginia, Richmond, Virginia.
And so my parents love to have Masson come.
Yes.
I would start coming to their house every summer when I was four years old.
Yeah, and they would take her all over Virginia.
Virginia has a lot of history.
I mean, it's the mother of presents, whether seven or eight presents from Virginia.
Like eight presents or from there.
I've been to every Virginia presence home.
Like they would take me for two weeks starting at age four.
Yeah.
Wow.
And they would just geek out on presence homes and all kinds of historical things.
And historical size like Jamestown, Williamsburg, D.C., Yorktown.
Exactly.
Like where the battles were.
Yeah.
That's so cool.
I'm about to go to D.C. for the first time.
I'm so excited.
Really?
You've never been there?
Uh-uh.
Oh, my gosh.
I love it.
I know.
And I love, I love, this is the thing, I never really learn history, like in school, but I love going to historical things.
Like, I love, like, I love a good tour of, like, something.
Like, I would love to go to Virginia and do all of those.
Do you like nature?
Yeah.
Yeah.
So Madison's brother, Parks, is a big wildlife photographer.
He's, he's big into nature and so am I.
And we love going to the Museum of Natural History there.
You'll love it.
I mean, it's just fascinating.
The Museum of American History, I love.
Yeah.
Yeah.
There's a lot to do in the mall there.
I also love the Natural History Museum too.
Yeah.
Question for both of you.
What are some stigmas around autism?
Like what do you think people maybe have wrong about autism?
Yes.
So one thing that's true is I am right-brained and on the autism spectrum.
And from research, I read something when I was in college that 0.7 of the population are autistic
and right-brained, which is very rare on the autism spectrum.
I'm thankful to have that gift.
Yeah.
Because most of the autistic population is left-brained.
Oh, that's interesting.
It is.
And I showed that to one of my favorite professors in college, and she's thankful that I
had that gift.
Yeah.
It is interesting that, again, autistic people are all very different.
I mean, there's certainly there are themes that are similar, but you hate to put them
in any one box.
You know, we, Jenny and I always wondered, geez,
should we get Madison into, you know, things like coding or computer science or concert piano,
just things where you- Yeah, I had no idea. You tried piano lessons with me and I didn't really care for it.
Yeah. Like I was, I always wanted to do stuff that was with other kids.
Like, mom and dad signed me up for every extracurricular activity. Yeah.
That was with other kids. Like, you guys signed it for gymnastics at my gym when I was three years old.
Yeah. And I enjoyed it. And then horseback riding. And then,
One of my friends encouraged me to do Girl Scouts in the second grade.
Okay.
And then I did dance.
Then I did theater.
And then I did Special Olympics.
Like I did track.
I did.
Then I joined the track team in middle school.
And then I did Special Olympics track and bowling and Special Olympics soccer, special
Olympics basketball.
Like, plus I started jewelry making when I was 10 years old.
You've been busy.
And plus I was in every leadership program in high school.
Plus I was in best buddies.
Wow.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I mean, to get back to your question.
I'd like to circle back on that in a second.
But to get back to your question, Madison is interesting because one of the stigmas is that if you're autistic, you know, you can only do things like coding or, you know, we work with numbers and things like that.
Again, again, many, you know, I would say a lot of folks on the spectrum are incredibly talented in those areas.
Madison, Madison, and we were told early on that autistic people didn't like to be social.
You know, they were isolated. They play by themselves. They, you know, sit in their room, play video games by themselves and things like that. And Madison's not like that. She's very different. She wants to be social. You know, at high school, she just, what made her happy was to be accepted by these, you know, girls and want to sit with them in the cafeteria and go, you know, to the prom. And, you know, she wanted to be, she desired those things. And we were always told that that's not how autistic people feel. Yeah. And I think a lot of people,
again, a lot of the people that have been,
a lot of the cast members on the show have,
I think a lot of them want that.
I think a lot of them desire that.
I think that's been,
I think that's changed some thinking.
You know,
but back to all of Madison's extracurricular activities.
I think part of that was,
first of all,
she wanted to do those things.
Yeah.
But Jenny and I,
Jenny and I decided that,
look,
we're going to have accommodations for Madison
and we're going to try to go at her pace,
but we're just not going to,
not going to settle for the fact that she's just going to be isolated and she's not going to
develop. Why can't she be in a normal Girl Scout? Why can't she just be in a regular Girl Scout troop or
you know, be on a sports team or just do whatever she wants? Why can't she do those things? And
she wanted to do those things and we pushed her and said, do whatever you want. She was literally
signed up for everything. It's like, it's like Rushmore, you know, when he was in every,
you wanted to be in every club.
Yes.
But, you know, I think it really helped Madison to, you know, explore a lot of these different
activities and be around not just special needs kids because she had some great programs
with a lot of wonderful special needs kids.
But she also wanted to be around neurotypical kids.
I think that was really helpful for her, you know, to be around both.
And, you know, and look at you now.
Like you know.
I love it.
Yes.
I'm very thankful that my mom and dad signed me up for all these activities looking back.
because it's part of the reason why I'm so social.
And you're so achieving.
So I bet you loved it before you even knew that you liked achieving things.
Yes.
And I'm so, I'm looking back.
Like I was literally the top seller in my Girl Scout troop.
Yeah.
Not surprised.
Which was a fun, which was a fun fact.
Yeah.
I have a couple questions for you to end.
Yes.
What is something that you haven't done yet but want to do?
I would love to get my jewelry sold in gift shops, and I would love to have a sensory-friendly
clothing line and learn how to sew my own clothes.
Oh, wow.
I'd love to get my Zen buddies and Christmas ornaments and gift shops.
I feel like we can make that happen.
Yes.
Madison and her brother have a business called Madazen.
Okay.
You want to tell her with Madazen, M-A-Z-N-U-S-A-D-C-O-C-C-O-C-C-O-C-C-O-C-O-C-O-C-W-S-E.
Okay.
Tell me about it.
Yes.
So I started making jewelry at age.
10 and I started selling my jewelry when I was 14 years old in the community at our pool,
at our park, at our rec center.
And I would sell it at autism fund fundraisers and at school events and at craft fairs.
Okay.
I had a lot of behaviors at the time that I couldn't control.
And then making jewelry was my way to release that energy and to help me feel calm and at peace
and tranquil and give me something to do with my hands.
Okay.
And Matt is Zen is a play on words of it.
Yeah.
The Zen.
Yes.
The Zen part of her names.
Yeah, yeah.
You know, a couple of years ago, Madison, when she was living in Plymouth, Massachusetts,
and we had just moved down here, and we were really experimenting with, can we live that far apart?
And she was part of this independent living program.
Yes.
She would, Madison would, you know, on her own initiative, she would actually go and she would find these art fairs, these, you know, craft shows and stuff.
She would sign up for it.
She would pay for the booth.
Then she would get an Uber.
The Uber would take her there and she would settle the stuff up herself.
And then she would sell it.
And she would sell, you know, I don't know, would you sell $100, $200, $200 or something like that.
But the Uber and the show and everything else would cost $500.
I'm like, Madison, this is not profitable.
We've got to do something about this.
But now it's working out.
Yeah.
That's so cool.
And then I continue to do the same thing.
college and then, but all I really wanted was to have an online store and then love on the
spectrum gave me that platform and then my brother Parks created my website from scratch and
helps me do my content. He's been a very helpful and supportive business partner.
That's awesome.
They've got a successful business. Parks quit his job and they do this full time now.
And you know, and now they're trying to expand and they're trying to get in some of these areas
and getting to some brick and mortar stores. And so we're exploring those collaborations
right now.
Yeah.
But I think for Jenny and I, you know, besides the fact that we're glad that our children
are, you know, gainfully employed now.
Yeah.
By themselves.
For sure.
And they've gotten great support.
And Madison donates money to a lot of charities from, you know, the bracelets that they sell.
But I think what's been a blessing for Jenny and I is that this has given Madison and
Parks an opportunity to really become close.
Because, you know, when they were growing up, you know, there was a little.
there was a three-year age gap.
He's a boy.
She's a girl.
You know,
she has in her head
that she can't be friends
with her brother.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
That's,
that's natural, right?
And, you know,
they shared a bathroom.
And we had very different interests.
Yeah.
And we had very different friends.
Yeah.
So Parks has moved in with masses.
So they're roommates.
You see that in the show.
You'll see that in the first episode of the season four.
They moved to Plant City in Florida,
which is about between Tampa and Orlando.
and they move in together and they started this business together.
And what's been so great about it is that they really,
they really have become close and they really trust each other.
And I think Parks probably understands Madison as well as we do now.
Yeah.
And they have a special bond.
And that probably would not have happened had all of this stuff happened
in the last couple of years.
Yeah.
You know, and so that's another part of the blessing of Madison being on the show.
And when Jenny and I are not around anymore, we want Madison to have a family member that she trusts that, you know, cares for her.
For sure.
So I think that's probably, honestly, it's probably the biggest blessing of all this.
That's so sweet.
Yeah.
My next question for you, Madison, is what's your favorite thing about yourself?
I would say, like, I would say my own unique sense of style because if I never had autism, I never would have had my own unique sense of style.
That's a great answer.
next question is what advice would you give other people about autism autism autism is a journey
non-disorder it's meant to make you it is not meant to break you and there's so many gifts that come
along with autism because if i never if i never had autism i wouldn't know the whole entire
disney dictionary dictionary and the whole entire franchise like i never would not only just the characters
but but the actors and actresses that played every disney princess i would never know the you're
The movies took place, settings in the movie, and the screenwriters.
Yeah.
And I also would not know every president in order.
I also would not know how to say hello in 50 languages, nor be conversational in Spanish and French and German.
I never would know all the states and capitals.
I never would have my own unique sense of style.
Yeah.
I never would know how to make jewelry and sew and draw and paint very well as I do.
And I, and last but not least, I wouldn't.
have the amazing memory that I have and my attention to detail. For example, I have, I remember
hotel rooms. We stayed on vacations. I remember, remember where I sat in an airplane, like the
flight, flight number, gate numbers, flight attendants, gate attendance. It's unbelievable. I also
remember names of people from, from our, from Charter Oak Pool and Fountain Grove Pool from when I
was a kid. Yeah. So do you help your parents out when they can't find their car when you go shopping
with them? Yes. And I'll help my brother out. Yeah. She used to help me. She used to help us when we
saw somebody coming, maybe from our town. That I knew, that I knew. And I knew everyone.
I knew everyone. Mass and quick, quick, who is this coming? Who is this coming? She's giving me the
stats. Like, it's not, it's not just, oh, that's, that's Mrs. So-and-so. She's like,
good. She's given me the stats.
The memory is unbelievable.
I love that. That's so cool.
She can remember anyone. She will, she will, she will, she will remember everyone's name.
Anyone she meets this week, she'll remember their name 20 years from now.
Yes. Like, even, even fans I have, like, I remember, like, like, even fans that I have, like,
that have seen, like, more than once. Like, I remember, like, when I, when I've met them and
their names.
That's so cool. Okay. Last question I have for you is what makes you feel proud.
being on love on the spectrum and finding my cowboy sweetheart.
That is a perfect answer to end on.
Well, thank you both so much for coming.
Madison, we'll leave a link down below to Madison
so people can go shop your bracelets and your jewelry.
Thank you to the Taylor-Lawner Squared.
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