The Squeeze - Meg Donnelly: Managing Intrusive Thoughts and Anxiety

Episode Date: November 13, 2024

In this week’s episode, actress and singer Meg Donnelly shares her journey of navigating mental health from a young age. Meg opens up about experiencing anxiety and intrusive thoughts at just eight years old, shedding light on the triggers and how it manifested in her life as a child. She goes on to share how her anxiety has evolved as she’s gotten older, impacting both her career and daily life. Meg talks about the balance she’s found with social media, along with the tools and resources that have helped her most in protecting her mental well-being. We also dive into her starring in the Zombies franchise, her exciting transition into the music industry, and the release of her new single, “in my bag,” coming out on November 15th!Be sure to follow Meg on Instagram https://instagram.com/megdonnelly/!Presave Meg’s new song “in my bag” here: https://www.megdonnelly.com/?fbclid=PAZXh0bgNhZW0CMTEAAaYM8GM1BJCajV0Gd48tPAZcTU08stWqL75k8WdEqfrzV42tCyjq3yv8L-8_aem_36a6cifeEW4k-InLu3k5FATo email us your questions or share your story, you can reach out to [e-mail] sure to rate, review, and follow the podcast so you don't miss an episode! Plus, follow us on Instagram:The Squeeze:  https://instagram.com/thesqueeze/Tay Lautner: https://instagram.com/taylautner/Taylor Lautner: https://instagram.com/taylorlautner/& TikTok:  https://tiktok.com/@thesqueezepodcastTo learn more from The Lemons Foundation, follow  https://instagram.com/lemonsbytay/ and visit lemonsbytay.comEpisode Sponsors:Bring your traditions to life with independent art and design this holiday season. Use code SQUEEZE for 20% off Minted holiday cards and gifts. Gift yourself and your loved ones the best gift of all - Jenni Kayne. Get 15% off your first order when you use code THESQUEEZE at jennikayne.com.Head to Ollie.com and use code SQUEEZE to get 60% off your first box. They offer a Clean Bowl Guarantee on their first box so if you’re not completely satisfied, you can get your money back. Head to JLOBEAUTY.com/SQUEEZE to recieve 20% off and THREE FREE GIFTS - a one hundred and seventy-five dollar value. Remember to head to Zbiotics.com/SQUEEZE and use code SQUEEZE at checkout for 15% offProduced by Dear MediaSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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Go to your reis-adviseur or sunnycars. The following podcast is a dear media production. When people that are in the Disney world talk about it is a little scary to talk about. When I was eight years old, like I started having like panic attacks. My mental health wasn't very good. Mom was diagnosed with breast cancer when I was seven. Like my parents would be like, are you okay? Like let's talk about it. And I was like, I'm so good. I'm not going to burden them with my thought because I just kind of bottled a lot of

stuff up. I started to get like intrusive thoughts just about like death and health anxiety too. Do you even know what a panic attack is at that age? I didn't know what it was. I didn't realize that they were abnormal until I talked about it out loud and like all the thoughts that I were thinking where like people don't, they don't obsess about them. Because like, you know, you could be like going through your day and you're like, oh, like what is the meaning of life? And they're like, ah. Yeah. Anyways, like, okay, like whatever. But I would think about it and then I'd be like, wow, that was a scary thought. And then like the whole rest of the day, I'd just be like, oh, like, I wonder if everyone else is thinking about this. That's where it becomes like intrusive.

When you give it power. When life gives you lemons, what do you do with them? Over here at The Squeeze, we talk about it. Meg, welcome to The Squeeze. Thank you. This is so fun. I'm so excited. Okay, so we start each episode off with this beautiful jar here. It's called Citrus Got Real.

There's a bunch of questions in there. If you want to pull one out. Okay, cool. I would say we start half of the episodes with this. We try to do them all. We try to do them all. We often forget. Okay, what is your guilty pleasure TV show?

Oh, that's good. I don't feel guilty about it, but I feel like most people would kind of be like, but bluey. Oh, wow. Yeah. On, what is it? Disney Plus? Yeah. It's so good.

Is that what it is on? I don't know. Why are you looking at me? Yes, I don't know. Our friends have that same thing. They have kids, but they put the kids to bed and then they continue to watch it. Yes. It's so good.

It's like, it's a kid show. And most people who watch it, like, have kids, obviously. But the adults also love it because it's like really real themes. And there's also a lot of episodes about like the parents too. But like kids wouldn't pick up on it. But like the episodes are all really deep. But the kids don't. Like it's like fun for kids.

Yeah. What was the one that they showed us? They were like, you have to sit down. Oh, which one was it? This was like, we were at a barbecue at their house. And they were like, can you guys do us a favor? Just give us 20 minutes. watch this incredible episode of Blue.

All 15 of us that were there. Do you remember which one it was? Oh, shoot. Do you know what it is about? I feel like I could probably like if you, oh, it was, it was about it was, I think it was about it was Bluey and bingo, uh-huh, in the backseat of a car. And they were talking about the dad was explaining how one of them like processes things differently? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I think that's what it was, right? I don't know why I'm looking at you

clearly. I'm not going to remember it. Yeah, I didn't pay too much attention. Like how both kids like process things differently so your parenting styles have to change for like two kids. Yeah. Is it sad though? I feel like it ended and it was sad. I think it was more like, some are, I feel like, or like melancholy kind of thing. We have to ask them after this because now I'm like really curious. Yeah. But they have been telling us to like just watch the show. Maybe we need to now. It's really comforting. Taylor doesn't do comfort shows. It's really good.

Yeah, I guess I like like high-stress shows. Oh, really? It's either high stress or... What's your guilty shows? Either, like, crime docs or, like, trashy dating shows. Yeah. Right. One or the other.

That makes sense. I love a good, raunchy dating show. If it's scripted, it needs to be, like, a murder mystery type, like where you're, you know, guessing who did it. at the end of each episode. Yeah, but then you don't really do well with those because if it's a show that is high stress, Taylor...

She's about ready to diss me. Here we go. Am I wrong? No. Taylor can't watch shows that... He can watch them, but he just has questions. Shows that make you, like, sink and you have to, like, put clues together. Right, right. Taylor can't really do that that well. So the whole time...

We're watching the show, disclaimer. It's like... Oh, yeah, I've heard. It's intense. Yeah, yeah. It's very like you're trying to figure out what is going on. And every time he's like, wait, what happened? Who is that? Why did they do that?

And I'm like, nah. The worst person to watch a show with. You, not me. Yes, me. Oh, okay, great. You know how in like Marvel movies, I don't know why Marvel movies specifically, but they just say so much exposition to explain what's happening. Yeah.

Because like most people, whatever. And like, I think we were watching like Black Panther too and they said, we're going to get the vibranium like literally 10 times. And my boyfriend was thinking in his mind, like, oh my God, like, why do they have to keep saying it? Like, this is ridiculous. And I literally was like, wait, so they're getting my brain. That's what I need.

Oh, my God. No, no, I'm the same way. It takes me a long time. And by the time I get it, they're onto something else. And I'm like, oh, no. Yeah. I get that. You would think that you guys would understand.

Yeah. Well, you would think. You would think maybe you get lost in the character. Yeah. You're living it with them. Did you have an answer there? Um, I just, I, I just, I, I love like an easy show, like a comfort, like a friend.

She just wants to turn on friends every night. Me too. I just start watching sex in the city though. Ooh, that's a good one. I'm enjoying that. I've never watched it before. Well, I'm really excited to have you here and just have a good mental health conversation with you because I think it's really cool when people that are in the Disney World talk about it

because I feel like you guys have such access to a younger generation that needs to hear the conversation. that needs to hear the conversation and be more comfortable about talking about it because it's definitely something that is a little scary to talk about. Was there something that kind of sparked you sharing your story publicly? Yeah, I think it was during COVID, like when the lockdown happened in 2020, a lot of my friends who, you know, growing up, like I, when I was eight years old, like I started having like panic attacks and my mental health wasn't very good. And at the time, it wasn't really like talked about none of my friends or like family, like extended family, like really knew what was going on.

Yeah. And so during 2020, like so many people reached out to me. They're like, hey, I think I had that thing that you had when we were growing up. And I was like, oh, wow. And then I realized like, wow, a lot of people might be struggling with this for the first time because I feel like a lot of it's like a control thing. Like, especially COVID, it was so out of our control. And then people are like, wait, like, you know, especially health, anxiety and stuff.

So then I was like, maybe I should start talking about it openly because I feel like there's a lot more people going through this than like we all think. So that's kind of what started that whole journey. It was really scary at first because I was like being like that vulnerable. But then like seeing the response of it and seeing how many, just kids. in general. I feel like kids especially. Like no kids should have to go through that. So that felt really good. And now I just really like talking about it. Yeah. Yeah. I think it's so cool how like that's something we've learned with this podcast, how it's so scary. Then you finally say the saying. And then it almost minimizes it in a way. Like after you finally say, you're like, oh, it actually wasn't as like,

you know, intense as it was in my brain. And it's so cool to see like the response and how everyone like relates to you. Because there's always that thought. of like, oh, like, I'm the only person struggling with this or people are going to think I'm weird for, you know, dealing with this or whatever. So it's, it's really cool that you, like, got to experience that feedback. Totally. Thank you. Yeah. You said that anxiety and truth of thought started around eight. Was there something that triggered that or is that kind of just how it's always been for you? Yeah. I think like my mom was diagnosed with breast cancer when I was seven. And so I think like that whole time, I just was like, oh, like my parents would be like,

are you okay? Like, let's talk about it. And I was like, I'm so good. Like, um, and I feel like somehow at eight years old, I don't know how I was like, oh, my mom and dad are obviously going through so much. Like, I'm not going to burden them with my thoughts, which how does it like, but kids do. They do like, they do that. But like, it's kind of crazy to think about because you wouldn't think kids would know how to like, you know, go about that. Anyways, but yeah, so I think because I just kind of bottled a lot of stuff up, I started to get like intrusive thoughts just about like death and like health anxiety too. Like with my mom, but also with myself.

Like if I felt hot, like a little hot in like a room or something, I'd be like, oh, no, like it's the end of the world. Like really irrationally. But yeah, and then I had a hard time going to school and all this stuff. But yeah, I think it kind of started from the. there. Yeah, I think that's where it kind of started. Yeah. How do you like, how do you know that it's an intrusive thought at eight years old? Like what? I guess like as an, like, it's just, it's crazy that. Yeah. How are you able to identify at all what you're going through? Like,

like, do you even know what a panic attack is at that age? Like, do you know what an intrusive thought is? like, or were you just feeling that way and you didn't realize that's what you were going through until you got older? Yeah, I feel like at the time, it was, it's really weird. I, even at eight, I could feel my brain going from like non-anxiety to anxiety. Like, I remember like this specific day that it like switched. And then I was like, wait, what's like, I feel like I was just thinking like a lot more about things.

I didn't know what it was at all. I feel like it took a couple years to, like, talk to, like, my parents and go to, like, a therapist, like, a kid's therapist. And, yeah, and I feel like the intrusive thoughts were more just about, like, death. And I didn't realize that they were kind of abnormal until I talked about it out loud and, like, all the thoughts that I were thinking where, like, people don't think about. Or they don't obsess about them. Because, like, you know, you could be, like, going through your day and you're like, oh, like, what is the meaning of life? And they're like, ah. Yeah.

Anyways, like, okay, like, whatever. But I would think about it. And then I'd be like, wow, that was a scary thought. And then, like, the whole rest of the day, I'd just be like, oh, like, I wonder if everyone else is thinking about this. Like, I can't, like, you know. Yeah. I think that's where it becomes, like, intrusive.

Right. Yeah. When you give it power. Right. So I've been trying not to give it power. But some days it's easy. Some days it's not. So you explained that very well.

Because we were talking about, like, what exactly is an intrusive thought, but you explained to that. I feel like really well. Yeah, that was helpful. Yeah, because we were like, obviously it's like, you know, like I hear it and I'm like, oh, I know what it is, but I guess giving it, like the power to take over your day. Like when you're consumed. Yeah. Consumed by it. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Huh. Okay. So last week we talked about how Minted made our holiday card process stress free. And guess what? Our cards just arrived. And they are so gorgeous. I am so excited. went with one of their luxurious letterpress designs and the quality is truly just unmatched. There's something about holding a beautifully crafted card in your hand that just makes you feel so good.

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favorites under $250 and plenty of other gift-giving categories. Plus, they have an incredible rewards program where you can earn up to 10% back with every purchase, and joining now is completely free. Give yourself and your loved ones the best gift of all. Jenny Kane. Our listeners get 15% off for your first order. You can use code to squeeze at checkout. That's 15% off your first order at J-E-N-N-I-K-A-Y-N-N-E.com promo code to squeeze. Let getting dressed be one less thing to worry about. How old were you when you went to therapy? I was like eight or nine. Okay. Yeah. I honestly didn't know what I was, like what therapy was. So at first I would just make up like she'd be like, so like what was your most fond memory this year? I'm like, I went to

Ireland and met my, I've never been to Ireland. So I would just like make up stories. Stop. And then like because I thought I just had to tell her stories because like that's what people said. But even through all of that. I've never been to Ireland. Yeah, I've never, yeah, I've no idea. And I would just, like, talk about all these things. But through me telling her stories and how my brain works, somehow, she, you know, like, gave me, like, exercises and helped. And, like, I'm sure kids do that all the time.

Yeah. But, like, in hindsight, I was like, what was I doing? I have no idea. Oh, my gosh. But, yeah, shout out to Pat. She was great. So, yeah, I love Pat. Thanks, Pat.

Love you, Pat. Was it your parents? idea to put you in therapy? Yeah, because so the other weird thing, too, is I was like a huge theater kid, so I was in performing arts. And that helped, but also made things harder. Like I wouldn't want to go on stage sometimes. And my parents were really helpful.

And my dad studied psychology and in college and all this stuff. But they, I was such a happy kid and so extroverted that they were like, oh, these are like symptoms of anxiety and stuff. But like, there's no way. Because, like, she's just so happy and whatever. But you could be this, like, at the two at the same time. But after a while, they were like, you know what? I feel like she needs to talk to somebody who might be more specialized in it

because we want to make sure that she's okay. So, yeah, that's why I went into therapy. But I feel like it was hard for them at first to, like, really comprehend that I was, like, troubled or sad about things when I was such a happy kid. Yeah. So, yeah. How long did you do it for? Probably like a year and a half.

Okay. Yeah. Do they like teach you tools or? I'm just like I've never thought about that before. Yeah. Kids psychology and therapy to me is very fascinating. Yeah. Yeah.

It's wild. I remember my guidance counselor at school because I would go to the nurse's office every day. And then like at a certain point they were like, no, that way. Because they knew who I was. And then I went to the guidance counselor and she basically gave me like a stress ball. And like when you would press it, it would be like, you're okay. And like stuff like that. So like it was like little exercise.

It was like breathing exercises and being like no like being present and stuff. And a lot of it I just didn't realize like worked. But I think in hindsight, it did actually work. But since I was like, you know, like eight or nine at that point, I just was like, okay, I guess I'll just like breathe. But it actually does help. Like just like setting yourself and breathing. Wow.

But and then like all the kids in my class, like without them asking, I'm like, yeah, this is a stress ball. It's like whatever. It's like it's pretty cool. Trying to mask the fact that it's like. Yeah. I got it in Ireland. Yeah. I got it in Ireland.

It's a toy that my great grandfather had through generations. Oh, man. Oh, the Ireland thing is so good. So as you've like grown and gotten older, how is your anxiety, mental health? kind of everything, how has it grown with you? Has it changed much? Like, what are some differences that you notice? Um, it definitely has grown a lot. Um, I feel like definitely more positively. I feel like where I was when I was younger to now is just like, you know, so different. I feel a lot more, um, like, I mean, just open about like talking about it all, but also more manageable. I feel like. Um, and

it gave, it just like, hopefully people like listening will have hope that if they're in like in a really bad spot. Now it is completely possible to, it doesn't go away. Like that's one thing. I like would wish that it. I'm like, I wish I was normal. I wish I was whatever. But like that doesn't happen. But it becomes more manageable and then you use it for your own good. At least that's what I'm trying to do now. Like I'm not like, it's still a work in progress. But at least what I'm trying to do now is like see it more as like a good thing of like, okay, I'm really highly sensitive. and overthink a lot. So like,

let me try to use that for good. Or like with people and with stuff so you can like make people more comfortable because you're like, you know like what people are. Yeah, I don't know. So I don't know if that makes sense. But yeah.

I feel like I'm very similar with that. And how I feel like my, I feel like my anxiety, I do wish it would go away. But at the same time, when I do have those days where I am really anxious or I am having a panic. attack. I know that I'll get through it. So it gives me like a little more of like a hopeful

outlook. Totally. When I wake up and I'm like, oh, I'm literally like shaking today and I don't know why or what's going on. But, you know, I know I'm going to breathe. I know I'm going to do these things. And Taylor's been so helpful with me. I feel like we've got a really good little like process down of like how you, yeah. Oh. Yeah. That's true. I had a, I had a panic attack. I think probably the worst one that I've had like a month ago. I was driving. I was driving home. I've realized that I like alone time, but if I'm not in the right headspace, a long time is not good for me. Yes. But I do, I'm an only child, so I need, I need a loan time. Love it. I need a lone time to recharge. Like, I'll leave Taylor downstairs sometimes. I'll just, like,

open the bedroom and lay in bed and scroll my phone for 15 minutes. I'm like, okay, I'm recharged. Like, just I needed, like, myself. But I was traveling home and I was just like in my headphones, just by myself all day. And it was definitely more of an anxious time period. And we were going through some stuff. And I called him. And I, like, could not breathe, like, felt like I was going to pass out while driving. But I was on PCH.

And I couldn't, like, pull off anywhere. And he was like, just like, you were giving me, like, affirmations. And you were like, just take deep breaths. You got this. Like, it's okay. Just breathe. And I feel like it, that was, like, very helpful. It's helpful.

Yeah. Because I've never been trained in how to want to do in that scenario. No, but going through stuff like this. it's been like he's been very helpful just like knowing and not being like you're fine like what are you doing you do tell me I'm fine which I do need to hear half the time but you you walk yeah but I also understand that it doesn't like in that moment it doesn't matter if you're fine like no you know the I feel like some days I'm like anxious about just I work I just work myself up about things and he's like you're okay come but come down a couple levels I'm like yeah no you're right you're right so I do

to hear it sometimes. She's just like a thought spinner. Like she just like right. Her thoughts just yeah. You know, they really go. Very relatable. But like what usually like like sets them off is it like that's what I'm trying to figure out. Yeah. I think that's maybe the. Because half of the time she can't even identify what it is that like sometimes she's like, well, I started thinking about this and then I think I just spiraled. But that's probably half the time. The other is she's like, I don't even know. I don't know. I don't There will definitely be some days I wake up and I'm like, what's the word I used? I'm just like really like tense. Like my body is just like I feel very tingling.

My chest feels really heavy. Like I don't know. Like I feel like I got electrocuted. I'm trying to think of the word I used the other day. They did not use tense. Yeah, maybe that's. It was something to do with like you're, you were describing your like muscles and I think it might have been tense. Yeah.

Like I felt like I had to like keep like going like this. Right. Go like, yeah. Yeah, I know. But sometimes I'll just like wake up and that'll just like be how it is. And I'm like, oh, did I like dream about things or something from the night before? I've gotten, I've gotten in a better like routine of, I feel like because my brain spins. I always need to have like a piece of paper by me or my phone.

So I can write down because I feel like I'm going to like miss a thought. And there's just like so many different things that I feel like we do. She loves a list. I love a list so much. Yeah. My notes app. Yeah. It's, yeah.

My calendar's color coordinated. It's like, I live, live by it. No way. I need it. And Taylor's like, what's a calendar? I'm like, no. That's the story. That kind of person meets the calendar list person and they marry each other.

Yeah. That's how it works. It's true. And you call me down, though, for sure. How does your, like, anxiety manifest? Like, for me, a big thing is stomach stuff. Same. Oh, my God.

Yeah. Yes. Yeah. My stomach. I know. I think he might be the same person. Yeah, no, my stomach. I feel like, I feel like it might be, the other day I literally was like, I don't know

if there's like gluten intolerance or like people with anxiety just can't eat gluten. Yeah. Like, I think every time I eat bread, it just something goes wrong. But, which is so unfortunate. I eat it anyways. But, but yeah, it's definitely stomach. Like ever since I was a kid, even when I was eight, like the first panic, attack I had, it all started from my stomach. So I feel like I, I definitely, people hold it in a bunch

of different places, but I think mine's my stomach for sure. Like I, I, like, but, um, the other day, I feel like my stomach started to hurt and I was like, nope, that's, that's not real. I was like, that's just my brain. So I was like, y'all like, go to bed, whatever. And it, uh, and then it just like kind of went away. And I was like, whoa. That was like the first time my life I've ever done that. But now I'm like, you just know when it's like, yeah, like anxiety, stomach or like something like real. Yeah. Actually, it's really hard to tell the difference. I feel like I always have to have like water or like something bubbly with me.

Like if I'm in the car, I like need to have water. I'm like, what if I like, I don't know. My stomach is hurt and I like need water. Yeah. That's like I always. That's my, I know. Like when you wake up in the morning, you have to eat like right away so that like your stomach won't hurt. Yeah.

I know what you mean. Yeah. Or it's like, what if you're in the car? Like, where are the bathrooms? Like, I need to make sure that there's... Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. It's so funny. Yeah. Or if I'm going to a concert, okay, like, where's like... Yeah. Where's, like, the bathrooms out? Yeah. Where's the emergency exits?

I feel like you got a little bit of... My stomach anxiety has gotten better. I've also, like, I was born lactose intolerant. So, like, I've, like, just out of the womb just been a little messed up in there. Right. And I now, like, I take a probiotic and, like, it helps. things a lot in like my everyday life. When we first started dating, my stomach was not well at all. And I think it's because I was probably anxious too, but I had started taking my probiotic. But there was multiple

times we would be like going like into town for like a date or something. And I would feel like I was going to throw up in the car if I wasn't. And I would make him pull off to a gas station and go into the bathroom and I wouldn't go to the bathroom and I wouldn't throw up. But it was just like my anxiety and then I get back in the car and be like, well, nothing happened. But yeah, that did happen. few times. Yeah, I know. That only happens now when I'm at the nail salon. Which is weird. I have this. It's a long, I think it's the fluorescent lights. I worked as a COVID nurse and I have a lot of PTSD from that. So I think it's the lights. I don't know. But it happens almost every time I get my toes done. But I've realized now it's not really with my nails. It's mainly when I'm getting my toes done. But I think it's

because not, there's probably a list of reasons why it's because. But now when I go, I get cold water. I put my feet in cold water instead of hot water and it doesn't like get my heart rate going. It like calms me down. And they're like cold. I'm like, yeah, make it cold. And that's helped the past few times. Weird. Uh-huh. Interesting. What do you like the hot water? I think, well, because your feet are like a big, like heat receptor. And there's a lot of nerve endings in your feet. And so I think when it gets heated up, I already have like a little bit of anxiety. I'm like, and then my stomach starts hurting. And then I feel like I have to like throw up. And I think it just gets me heated. And then my heart I started to go up a little bit.

So I think that it just is like giving me like a false alarm in my head. That makes sense. Yeah. So now I do cold. You probably could use some cold plunging. Yeah, I know. Yeah, those are great for you. Those are crazy.

I know. I just do it like the ice baths. Can you do it? Barely. Yeah. Like you're just sitting there. It's crazy. Yeah.

But when you get out, you feel so good. I know. But while you're in it, it's crazy. I've never found anything like that before. I know. Do you do that and then into the sauna? Yeah, I did. I did for me and my friends, for my friend's birthday, we went to this, like, what's you called?

Spa. Yeah. And it was like a sauna, like, ice bath thing and you go back and forth. It was actually really fun. But we were just giggling the whole time because it's like crazy. Yeah. But the sauna feels so good after the ice bath. The ice bath does not feel good after the sauna.

Yeah. Never. Yeah. But I feel like that sometimes you have to, it's good to end there. though. Where? And the ice. I like ending, I'm acting like I do it all the time. The one time I did it. We did it. I did this rotation when I do it. When I do it, I did like to end with the ice bath because the sauna like relaxes you. So unless you were like, want to be tired and like go take a nap after. Right. I enjoyed. Oh yeah. I remember feeling that now. What? At that place. Micobo? Uh-huh. Yeah. When we did it. He made, he did it. He did it. And then he was like, and then I did it.

I did do it each day. You did it multiple times. You did like four times. Yeah. It was the three or four days. You were there. You're a professional. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

At this point. Good job, honey. Thank you. Anyways, when did you start acting? When I was, I was like a theater kid until I was like 10, 11. So like probably like 11 or so. Kind of like went into like TV acting. Yeah.

Okay. Yeah. So you've chosen. a career path that I feel like sometimes isn't the best on your mental health. Yeah. How do you think your career has impacted your mental health and anxiety and vice versa? Yeah. Definitely a lot, I think.

It's weird because I feel like performing and putting myself out there really helps my anxiety because it's like, you know, at least like intrusively, I'm always like, oh, I, you know, am very anxious, whatever. So like, I'm weak kind of thing. But then when you like do the stuff that you love while going through it, it's like, wow, I'm actually like, this is like a strong thing. So that makes me feel a lot better that I can get through my anxiety to do the things that I love. But on the other hand, yeah, it's, I feel like being in this business and it just being very like competitive and trying to figure out where your worth is like in like with career and I feel like now social media is like a really big thing for me. I think just like being perceived in general.

I overthink that a lot. Yeah. So I think that's like one of my main overthinking things. Yeah. It used to be so much easier before social media because I mean like even for me, you know, 10 years ago. Like, you just didn't, you didn't have to hear so many of the opinions. Yeah. Like, you could just do your work. And, I mean, you'd be, like, articles and stuff. But not, like, every day you just seen, like, hundreds of comments.

Yeah. Yeah, it's wild. It's definitely more complicated today. Mm-hmm. Yeah. And, like, you didn't get social media until, like, later. You were a late bloomer with it. But I feel like you're, you are within, I mean, I'm only, like,

couple years older than you, so I am also in that generation. But you're within the generation that has really just, like, grown up with social media. So I feel like we're starting to see how that has, like, impacted us. Totally. And, like, what that looks like. Have you had to, like, set any boundaries with social media? Yes. Yeah. I have this app called Refocus on my phone. And so it basically, like, blocks the social media apps. But then you can unblock it. So, like, when I am posting and stuff, You just unblock it for like 10 minutes and then post. So it just like limits my scrolling. Yeah.

Because I want to be active on social media, but I don't want to scroll. Because that's when I start spiraling. Because, you know, you just start like comparing yourself. You start literally everything that comes with social media. It just like happens all at once. You're like crying one video. You're laughing one video. It's like it's insane.

Yeah. Yeah. It's wild. Does it block it refocus? Yeah. That's what it's called. We're focused. I was saying it so I want to remember it.

Does it block it like after a certain amount of time or just those apps are permanently blocked on your phone unless you go in and unblock them? Yeah. You can do both. You can be like I'm setting like a 15 minute like time for Instagram. So like when you wake up for like the 24 hours, you only have 15 minutes and then after 15. So like you can do like 30 seconds here. Then in the afternoon like two minutes or whatever.

Got it. But mine is just like, that's what I did at first. And I was like, I just want to get rid of it. So, yeah, they're just blocked. Wow. But it's just TikTok, Instagram, and Twitter. Okay. It's hard.

But, but, yeah. That's cool. That's so good. I recently had a day that I just didn't, like, go on social media at all. And it's crazy how much time it takes up in your day. Yeah. Like I feel like I did so much stuff. And it's hard when like you're having to post on social media like when like for your job or like it's like incorporated into things.

So it's hard to be able to like get off it because I'll always like I'll go on. I'm like, oh, I have to post. And then I'm like, oh, wait, why did I come on here? Like 10 minutes later. I'm like, oh, I forgot I had to do this. But when I took that day off, I was like, oh, like this is actually really nice. And I need to incorporate that more. Yeah.

Yeah. It's got to get better at her. It's wild. How much like, like when any, doing anything in my day, like waiting online for something or just sitting down, like, I would go to like type in like Instagram or like TikTok and then it like comes up blocked. But like without even me, like I'm literally just like and then I'm like, oh, I was subconsciously like typing it in. Like that's insane. Yeah. Like so many times a day.

Like I still do. And then it's blocked. And I'm like, I can't believe I'm doing this. That's what I was doing that day. So many times I click on the app and open. I'm like, wait. No. I don't want to go on here.

Yeah. It's so subconsciously. Yeah. It's not even on my homepage. Like, I have to swipe to get to it. Yeah. But it was just like literally in rhythm to do that. Yeah.

It's wild. They know what they're doing over there. They do. They really know what they're doing. Today's episode is brought to you by Ollie. Clean fresh nutrition your dog needs and five flavors they'll absolutely flip over. You don't have to be a veterinarian nutritionist to know that feeding your dog real whole foods with minimal processing is one of the best choices you can make for their health.

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your best tomorrow. I kept hearing about pre-alcohol and wondered what it was actually like. Now that I've tried it, I get why everyone is talking about it. And with their GMO technology, Zibiotics is continuing to invent probiotics that will help everyday challenges of modern living. Go to Zs Zbiotics.com slash squeeze to learn more and get 15% off your first order when you use squeeze at checkout. Zbiotics is backed with 100% money back guarantee. So if you're unsatisfied for any reason, they'll refund your money. No questions asked. Remember to head to Zbiotics.com slash squeeze and use code squeeze at checkout for 15% off. What tools or resources have you found helpful when it comes to your mental health? Like, is there something if you're,

feeling anxious that you do or if you've had a long week, something that you like to do for yourself. Yeah, I feel like breathing is really important, but like deep breathing, obviously. But yeah, like deep breathing. And I think it helps center you. Like for a while, I was like, yeah, yeah. Like when people would be like, just breathe. I'm like, I am. And then you're like freaking out. But just, you know, like really taking the time to just like, read. And just like, resigning yourself, like, really helps. Also, what really helps is, like, the five things you see. Yeah. Four things you hear. Yeah. Three things. What is this? It's the five, four, three, two. It's your senses. Five things. Yeah. Five things you see. Four things you hear. Three things.

You smell. Earth, maybe three things you feel. You feel. Thank you. Yeah. Two things you smell and one thing you taste. Yeah. Five. I don't even know. What are you supposed to do? Just think about that. You go through, yeah. Yeah. It's a grounding where you sit and it's like, I see the chair. I see the camera. I see like it's like what you see. And then what are you,

when am I hearing? I hear pants as you're taking like deep breaths. Yeah. I saw this one thing. It was like doing five, four, three, two, one at a club. Oh, wow. Oh, boy. I don't know.

It's so funny. I mean, that's a place you got to use it. I know. But yeah, like just to like re-centered yourself. So you like take deep breaths while doing that. And it just like makes you more present. then you forget, like, sometimes you, like, forget, like, what you were even worrying about in the first place.

And you're like, oh, no, everything's fine. Like, I'm here and it's okay. And then also just music helps a lot, too. Yeah. I really like Bob Marley a lot. He's my favorite. And because all of his songs are literally like, everything's going to be all right. And I'm like, you're right, Bob.

You're right. Yeah. So right, Bob. Just listen to Bob. Come on. Bob and Pat. Bob and Pat. Bob and Pat.

Bob and Pat. Oh my God. Yeah. So. Have you, like, trained in breath work? Have you, like, been like... No. Okay.

I haven't. But that would be... I would... I want to look into that. I want to get more into meditation, too. Yeah. Because it really does help a lot. I took a class.

I never can say the word. It's like transincensensual. Oh, yeah. Don't ask us. Transincensional. Transintentional. Well, like, put it on the screen or something. Yeah, and I took a course and it's really cool because it's like you're not trying to stop your thoughts.

Like you just sit there for like 10 minutes every morning and every night and you sit there in silence and you just like let all the thoughts come by. But you just like want it like helps your day. Huh. I maybe did it for three days and I haven't done it since honestly. Yeah. But I really, really want to. I feel like it's so beneficial to like wake up like before your day, like wake up like an hour or two before. and like, you know, like meditate or like walk around.

So you're not just waking up and going. Right. Like that's when my most anxious days are is when I roll out of bed and go. Yeah. Right too. But I don't, I do that a lot as well. So I'm not saying that I wake up with two hours, but I'm trying to. Yeah.

Because there's a big difference when you do. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Even like getting like one of those mornings in like once or twice a month, I feel like, like, it's good. Like that's a good place to start. Oh yeah.

I went to the beach. the other morning. I, like, woke up at six and I was anxious and I was like, I need to go sit in the sand by myself. And I went and picked up a coffee, sat in the sand. It was literally the best thing ever. I came home. I was like, I'm doing this all the time. Haven't done it since, but I really want to. Right. Yeah. Oh, it's so nice. Yeah. Hey, at least we're like honest about it. Because when people, I just never understand how people can do it all. I strive to do that one day. Maybe I'll drive to the beach every morning because that's really a lot of time. But. Right. Something like that would be. maybe just like the 10 minutes of the trans, of breathing. Yeah, transintentational transintention. Wait, wait, wait. I had a question. Have you been to Ireland yet? No.

I haven't. But I am Irish, so I do want to go. Okay. So it wasn't that far off. No, exactly. Okay. Okay. But I think I said something like, oh, like my grandparents were there and like, well, also my

parents, like my dad's side of the family, they, there's like this thing. Do you know Blarnie? What's Blarney? Like when, like you, basically, you, they're like truth enhancer. Yeah, truth enhancers or lie enhancers. But like, you tell a, like a story. And the base is true. But you kind of, you're like, you know,

we got into a fight and 30 guys came out and we're fighting each other. And like, my brother came in and smashed a table. In reality, it was like two guys. Got it. No table was smashed. Yeah. But it's like called like the gift of the blarney. like to tell good stories.

Anyway, so there's so many things in my family that are probably like not true. Like there was this one where it was like my grandma and grandpa like lived in Ireland and one was Catholic, one was Protestant. They met and ran away to Ellis Island together. I'm like, but my grandparents like grew up in Brooklyn. So that was literally all I. But I was probably telling those stories to Pat. Oh my gosh. Pat probably got some really good stories.

Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. And I definitely got that from my dad. Yeah. It's so funny. You got the Blarney Gene? I did, yeah. But I try to clock it now.

I try not to. Because I'm so aware of it now. Yeah. Yeah. I actually feel like you used to do that more, but you've gotten better. Really? You're just a storyteller. So like, you just like get into it.

And I'm like, that wasn't really, just like fluff a little bit. Okay. Yeah. My mom and I will always like, my dad will tell stories and we're just crying laughing because it could not be more far. Yeah. And we were just like trying not to like kill his spotlight. Right. Oh my gosh.

But it is so funny. It's hilarious. So good. Okay, I want to talk about music. Yeah. I mentioned it a little bit. Did you start making music before or after the zombies friend? Like when that started.

When I was like 13, 14, I started like writing songs and I, that's something that I wanted to do. But I genuinely thought like you had to be in L.A. and like really like cool and like to like go into a studio and like record music. I didn't think you like could. Yeah. Um, so I was wrong, but, but, uh, now, yeah, so when zombies happened, there was a producer of one of the songs who was like, hey, like, you're from New York. I'm from New York. Like, come back. When you're back home, like, we can work on music. And that's like what kind of started that whole journey. Um, dang. That's cool. Yeah. And it's been like a while of like just making music and figuring out what works and everything. So.

Yeah. Are you enjoying it? I really am. Yeah. I feel like it's taken me a while to find, like, the sound that I really wanted to put out into the world. Yeah. Because I listen to so, just, like, my music tastes is very eclectic, so I feel like trying to figure out, like, which genre of music that, like, I related to the most was, like, really difficult to find. But also so much fun because I just experimented with so many different things. things. But now I feel like I finally found a specific sound that I really like. So that's cool. Are you wanting to focus more on music or acting or not really? Honestly, like both. Like I still like

acting a lot. But with music, I've never really fully put everything into it. And I feel like this is like the timing of everything is really working out now. So I would say I'm more like focused on music than acting. But I still really do love acting. We'd love to continue to act. Cool. I love that. Can you tell our lemon drops, those are our listeners. That's what we call them about your last single by my heart and then your new single in my back. Yeah. By My Heart was a song that I wrote with Cadence, who's so incredible at the top of the year. And I feel like it's just kind of about, you know, judging people by who they are and, you know, not by maybe their actions or, um,

things that they say. It's like a lot of times I worry about how people, like I said before, like how people perceive me and how like if people are like talking about me behind my back and all this stuff like I just, you know, overthink that stuff a lot, um, especially in this business. But the people who are in like my core group and my family who really love me, like will always know like my intentions and like who I am and will know that I'm not any of the people that people who don't know me will say. Anyway, so like the song's kind of just about that of like making mistakes is okay. Like you don't, you can be afraid. Don't be afraid to make mistakes because that's just like human. Everyone's going to at some point. I feel like a lot of times

I get so scared to like mess up or say the wrong thing because then I'm like, oh, people are going to hate me and whatever. And I think it's okay. And if you're aware of that, too, I think that makes you a good person. I always get really scared. I'm like, oh, am I a terrible person? Yeah. But I think, at least what my friends tell me is like, oh, if you're aware of that,

like, then you're a good person. So who knows. But yeah, that's basically what the song is about. And I really like it a lot. It means a lot to me. And I'm really happy that people are resonating with it. And then in my bag is pretty much the other side of my personality that's just like, you know, like confident. And it's kind of like a, I would say

it's like a get ready song. Like if I was like going out or something, I would like to listen to it to get confident and be like, I want to dance tonight. I want to go out with my friends. And so it's kind of the other side of like you can be vulnerable, but then also confident at the same time. Yeah. So yeah. That's awesome. Thanks. We'll leave a link for lemon drops to go stream it. Yes. Yehah. Sweet. Okay, should we do lemon seven?

Let's do it. Okay. This is our final little segment. Seven questions. You can rapid fire. You can go into a monologue, whatever your heart feels like answering them. And you can start us off. Okay, I sure will.

Like, we haven't done lemon seven in a while. I know. Sorry. Got to look at these. Okay, number one. What movie or song title best describes your mental health today? Movie or song? Movie or song?

Or TV. Or TV. Yeah. Maybe a Bob Marley song. Yeah, maybe. I feel like every title of everything ever is just not. Yeah. That just like went out of my mind.

Right. What's like a good... Like the actual title. title or like the movie or song itself, you know. I got an idea for you. Are you feeling in your bag? I'm feeling in my bag. You're so right. Good job. Yeah. In my bag. In my bag. Good job, buddy. Good In my bag. Love it. It's great. Yeah. Yeah. You're giving off in your bag. Yeah. My bag energy. That's good. Number two is how open are you with people in your life when struggling? I feel like I'm pretty open with people in my life.

But I can be like closed off at times. But I feel like it's like 50-50. Yeah, I'd say. Never know what you're going to get. Yeah, exactly. All right. Number three, if you could, oh, you could only follow three social media accounts.

What would they be? Okay, probably SpongeBob. Wow. Yeah. We really are the same person. Yeah, do you like SpongeBob? And Taylor didn't watch it and I always try to quote it. It's not true that I didn't watch it.

You just quote it all the time. Me too. I don't know what you're talking about. That's so funny. It's a biggest strain in our marriage. That's so funny. Yeah, my boyfriend wasn't allowed to watch it growing up either. So funny.

Yeah. Was there like, was there like raunchy humor in it? A little bit. Okay. I mean, it probably went over like a kid's head. Yeah. I think parents just didn't like the. Also was probably annoying.

Yeah. As a parent listening. Yeah. I think. Interesting. There was a study that went out and then it got debunked, but it was out for a while that like watching SpongeBob makes you lose brain cells. What?

And then it got debunked later, but a lot of parents like took that seriously. Wow. Oh my gosh. But I mean, who knows? I remember, I remember meeting the guy that played SpongeBob. You've never told me this? Yeah, I don't think I have. Oh, frick.

I think it was at like, um, Tom Kenny? Maybe. Yeah. I was doing a voice job and he was one of the other actors. And the producers were like, Taylor, you know, he's the voice of SpongeBob. And I was like, no way. And I remember him doing the laugh for me.

Oh my gosh. Yeah. It was very cool. That's so cool. Yeah. I got to hear that in person. Wow. Jealous.

You're so cool. I'm freak. I know. Okay. SpongeBob. Okay. SpongeBob. What other accounts do I follow that I really like?

I feel like like two other like meme accounts. Probably like, I don't know. Yeah, two movie accounts and SpongeBob. Just all memes everywhere. Yeah, yeah, good vibes. Comfort. Enjoy those. Number four is what is your favorite form of self-care?

My favorite. Oh, Casey Frey. That's who I was thinking of. Do you know the Instagram guy? I'm so bad on things. You'll have to show me after. I probably know. Casey Frey is number one, then SpongeDrop in like a meme account.

Yeah, I love Casey Bray. Who's Casey Frey? I'll show you guys. I need to look. I'm so bad with knowing the names of things. I also really like Britney Brosky a lot. Oh, yeah. She's funny.

I feel like I would follow her on like YouTube. I'll follow her on Instagram too. Huh. Okay, final answer is SpongeBob. Casey Bray and Brittany Roski. Okay. Locking it in. Locking it in.

Final answer. And then my favorite form of self-care is probably like during. like journaling. I love going to a cafe and just like writing. I call it girl bossing, but it's literally responding to text and email. But I really love doing that and just like walking and journaling. If I could do that for like a full day, that would just be amazing. When you journal, do you just like free write or do you have like a format that you follow? I just free, like whatever is coming out of my mind. I just like write. I just like write. it all down. Yeah. Yeah. And then try to like make it into something. Yeah. Yeah. That's cool.

Mm-hmm. Number five, what would you say is the most misunderstood thing about you? Ooh. Hmm. I don't know. I feel like something that's really interesting about social media is like it's always kind of the best parts of you and it can be like curated a lot of times. So I feel like I've met a lot of people in person and they're because of my Instagram or something, they're like, oh, I didn't think you were going to be as like, like, weird. Right. Not in a bad way. Right.

Yeah. They're like, oh, like, your social media doesn't really, like, bring that across. It seems like I would be more, I don't even know, like, intimidating or something. Right. Which I hope now. I hope, like, people don't think that way. But, yeah, so I think that's, what's misguiding is maybe I look more like. like on social media or something like that.

Yeah. Yeah. It's like quirky, funny. Yes. Yeah. But, but I definitely like love fashion. I love like, you know, like posting those kinds of photos. But I'm trying to find a balance right now of kind of doing both.

Yeah. So, yeah. We'll get there. Yeah, I'll get there. Number six is who has had the most positive impact on your mental health? Ooh. Probably Bob. I, his, like, his music just has helped me in like so many different ways. Like, I usually put on headphones, even if it's like in public and stuff and I'll like listen to him and he just makes me feel like automatically just more calm. And so his music has really helped me a lot. And then also my parents for just being really understanding and always knowing when something is off or wrong. So I feel like just I'm really grateful to have had them growing up. So.

Yeah. Did you see the Bob movie? I did. Was it good? Yeah, I really liked it. Okay. Yeah. It was dope. Okay. Yeah. I knew that was either going to be a hit or miss. Right, right. You never know with like bio picks. Yeah. Okay. Last but not least, number seven, if you could go back to one moment in your life, what moment would that be and what would you say to yourself? Ooh. I feel like if I could go back to a moment. I feel like if I could go back to a moment. moment in my life, it would just be like a random, like, weekday when I was like six or seven. Just feel like, like your view on life was just so, like, vibrant and you're just like going to school and coming back and like your parents are like, they have dinner and like just any, any day of that time period. I just miss it so much. Just being a kid like that. And I would definitely tell my younger self to just stop being so.

so hard on yourself because I still am now, but even when I was a kid, I remember being really hard on myself for really no reason. I'm sure there's no reason now, too, even though I think there is. But yeah, I would just tell my younger self to just like be like authentic, like don't try to fit into whatever and just be yourself. But I feel like every little kid should hear that. Take it easy. Yeah. Well, you're telling them and share. your story I think is so awesome. And I'm so grateful that you joined us today. Thank you. Thank you so much for having me. This is so much fun. My gosh, I can't wait to film our TikTok. Thanks again. Away.

Please note that this episode may contain paid endorsements and advertisements for products and services. Individuals on the show may have a direct or indirect financial interest in products or services referred to in this episode.