The Squeeze - Sadie Robertson Huff: Friend of Fear

Episode Date: March 8, 2023

At such a young age, today’s guest has already accomplished more than most do in their entire life. Sadie Robertson Huff rose to fame on her family’s reality show, Duck Dynasty, followed by finishing runner-up on Dancing with the Stars. She joins your hosts to discuss her journey battling fear and anxiety. Sadie speaks to the stress of living a hypocritical lifestyle—one where she looks perfect on social media but struggles with herself and her romantic relationship. Knowing God was with her, Sadie began to push back on her fears and went viral with a stripped-down YouTube video showing the world who she really was, "imperfections" and all. Sadie also opens up to the Lautners about motherhood: how it has helped her with things like body image but how new things, like mom guilt, have been challenging. She shares the story behind the name of one of her books and her ministry, Live Original, and then one of our Lemon 11 questions exposes the story behind her podcast name, WHOA That’s Good. For Sadie, so many things in her life changed when she learned to not let fear call the shots. We hope that this episode inspires you to lean into your fear and Live Original — just like Sadie. You can follow Sadie on Instagram @legitsadierob, and be sure to check out liveoriginal.com for books, events, and more.   To email us your questions or share your story, you can reach out to [e-mail].  Be sure to rate, review, and follow the podcast so you don't miss an episode! Plus, follow us on Instagram, @thesqueeze and personally @taylautner and @taylorlautner. To learn more from The Lemons Foundation, follow @lemonsbytay on Instagram and visit lemonsbytay.com  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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Over here at the squeeze we talk about it. Hello, everyone. Welcome back to another episode of The Squeeze. I am Taylor Lautner. That's why I wasn't a beatboxer, but I am Taylor Lautner. Oh my gosh. Hi.

I saw your head starting to move. I was like, you know, I was feeling it. I did not know where you were going with that. Oh, yeah. I'm just going to keep beatboxing for the rest of this interview. Okay, I'm done. Good thing that interview is already filmed. And that's why we do the intros after the interview.

Oh, my gosh. Just kidding. How's your day going, babe? It's a good day. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, it's a good day. It's beautiful outside.

A little cold. Kind of odd for Los Angeles area. But it's gorgeous. Life is good. Family and friends are good. I'm going to go play some pickleball. Lovely. So that always puts me in a good mood.

And we just had a terrific conversation with somebody that we were thrilled to get on this podcast. Yeah. So it's a good freaking day. Heck yeah. is on this episode we have miss sadie robertson huff on and i was so excited for this one yeah i just love her and the human that she is she's just so kind and so herself and so loving and encouraging and is filled with so much wisdom i didn't want the interview to end even though i'd be really bad a little bit of wisdom yeah i know we like look down at her i feel like this happens a lot to

be honest, but it definitely happened with Sadie. We looked down at our computer and I was like, oh, we've been recording for almost two hours. We've been in here for a long time. We talked a lot before, though. Yeah. Was there something that stood up to you from her? There was, I literally we finished the episode and you're going to hear me. I was like, I can't wait to watch this back because there's so many, she's so many like nuggets of wisdom. Yeah. And she's just like lived a lot of life. I didn't realize she was so young. When the show came out, I didn't realize old she was when. 14 when the show came out, Duck Dynasty, for those of you that aren't aware. She was 15 turning 16 when she wrote her first book. She was 16 when she was runner up and dancing with the stars. Yeah.

I mean, then she's just done everything in the world sense. Yeah. Did I say that right? What did I say? Everything in the world sense. Everything under the sun, she's done. Yeah. She's lived a lot of life. She's my age. You guys are the same age? Mm-hmm. 97.

Oh, wow. Yeah, but I also felt like I could relate to her a lot as well. Just, you know, the fame, you know, kind of hit the same-ish times in our life talking, you know, we talked about going through high school, you know, both actually going to high school and dealing with that. we related on fear and how that can hold us back in life or how you can use fear to push you further and bust down those walls and break those boundaries. Yeah, not like live a life defined by fear. Yeah. I feel like that's like a very cliche thing.

Don't let fear define you, but like fear defined her for a very long time. Yeah. And it's so cool to see. Like, obviously, you're still fearful of some things, but it's not the driving force behind the... No. You doing things or not doing things. Don't let fear be the boss. Yeah.

You know, like, use it. Like, I found... We talked about this with Sadie, but for me personally, I found that, like, being scared of things is a good thing. It's good. And, like, it turned into so many wonderful things in my life. Like, the things that I was most scared of and telling myself, I can't do that. I don't want to do that. I didn't want to do it just because I was scared.

Yeah. And all those things turned into, you know, wonderful things for myself personally. And just, yeah, felt like I could relate to so much of what she had to say. Really, really, really special conversation. Yeah. Something that stood out to me, we asked her one of our 11th, 11 questions, how open are you with the people in your life when you're struggling? And obviously, like, a lot of what she does is just sharing her life being vulnerable. a lot of the time.

But I love what someone had told her. She was listening to something. Someone told her this. She was like, everyone can know like the 99% about you, but that 1% will eat you alive. Yeah. And it's so important to have that person

that knows your 1% even though that's like so scary. Yeah. Finding a partner, having, like for her, it's Christian or husband and her mom. Like having that one person, whether it's a friend, family, therapist,

whoever it is, like having that one person to share that 1% with. Because it's true, like that if you're, feel like you're like she was like not living an honest life. Like that's the 1% that ate her alive for so long. And like what was a big factor in her anxiety and in her fear. And that really relates to a lot of us. Yeah. You have to make sure you're sharing that 1%.

Yeah. But I am just so excited to listen to this episode back. It's going to be so great. I love her. She's such a special human and we are honored to have her here with us. Absolutely. Can wait for you guys to listen? You are going to love it.

Enjoy. Sadie, thank you so much for being here on the squeeze. We're so excited to have you. I'm excited. I can't believe I'm here actually in the squeeze house. In the squeeze, in the flesh. I love it. We can't believe you're here in the flesh.

This is awesome. We are so thankful that we got to do this. Oh, we're done perfect. have you here. Yes. So we start each episode with our citrus got real jar. It has a bunch of very deep, serious questions. Wow.

Just prompt the mood. Scary. If you want to pull one, I should have had you pull one before I got you all situated. Oh, you're good. This is my new drum roll. My ASMR drum roll with the mic. That's great. All right.

Let's see what citrus I got. Oh, I got two. That's scary. Oh, no, I did. The paper is really, every time someone pulls, he's like, the paper's so long. I was like, I didn't have time to cut the edges. I just cut straight across. Oh, it's perfect.

It's perfect. Oh, wow. How do you hang toilet paper over or under? You know, this is such an interesting question for me to get because I am so not a routine person that I don't have a preference. However, it gets on there, it gets on there. And then I was thinking about this other day. I was like, you know, there is a better way, but I can't remember which way I thought was better. But I remember thinking, I'm going to start doing this. But this story goes nowhere because I

forgot what way it was. So for those listening, if you have any advice, what is the way or do y'all have the way? I'm very passionate about this. Okay. I think, did I do this one? I think you wrote that. Because this is something I'm very passionate about. When she puts it on the other way or like, or cleaner or something, it just totally messes me up. Definitely, it has to be over. Because when you're pulling it from under, it's just much more difficult to like yank it off. When it's over, you just pull it. And I just feel like it's so much simpler. I think I see.

I think I see that that was probably the way because the under situation is a problem. If you pull it, I feel like it just like can. Yes. It's hard to get it off and that can just like catch and just like unroll. The thing is when you have a little dog because we have a little dog who jumps and we have an almost. two-year-old. So we're constantly walking into the bathroom with the toilet paper just everywhere. Oh, my gosh.

And ripped to shreds. And it's a combination of both of them. Honey taking it all off, Cabo shredding it all up. And so, you know, they work together. They do. They work hard together. I'm like, you're lucky it's not 2020. This would be a bad situation for both of you.

Oh, my gosh. That's so funny. Thankfully, we have more toilet paper now, so that's good. Hilarious. The toilet paper was, that was like the last time. You didn't snap at me, but that you got sassy with me. What? That I know he likes it over.

But Taylor's also the person that won't put the new roll on. He'll finish the roll. He'll leave the roll there empty. I'm waiting for you to finish. Go ahead. Finish. Take the toilet paper out, put it next to it. So then I'll put it on.

But he took it off to blow his nose or something. And then put it back on. And then later that day, he's like, babe, we just talked about this. Like putting it over. I was like, bro, you are the one that took it off and put it. Now I'm scared what you're going to say. I'm just going to say that I've gotten a lot better at that. You have.

You have. You used to get me in trouble for it. And I feel like in the last year, I feel like I don't do that anymore. I feel like I posted like Instagram store air. I told Jason Lowe that you did that. And they definitely called me out. I think it was in front of Jason Lowe. I was like he'll just put the toilet paper there because we were talking about marriage or something.

And then since then I felt embarrassed. Sometimes you need a healthy call out, you know, accountability. It helps. I mean, and I'm the same way. with my husband because he is a little bit more particular than me. And I'm like, okay, if you're going to have the opinion, then you got to, then you got to do it. You know, if you care about the role, I don't care about the role. You got to put the roll on how you want the roll.

Oh, my gosh. Oh, man. The serious stuff. Those serious questions. This is a strong start. Yeah. Well, now that we got that out of the way, I guess let's start with the show. I'll go all the way back to the beginning.

How old were you when the show started? Okay, so I was only 14 whenever Dut Dynasty started. We filmed our like pilot episode whenever I was in eighth grade. Then it came out whenever I was in ninth grade. And we filmed our last episode about a month before I graduated high school. So it was my whole high school career that we had our show on TV, which was quite a way to spend high school, especially in a small town. I feel like if you're from L.A., it's a little bit more normal to be on TV. But when you're from the other L.A., Louisiana, it's not normal to be on TV.

And it was definitely a little bit interesting. It kind of took a while. I feel like for the first season, it was so big as far as everywhere and the, really everywhere, especially in the country. But because we lived so sheltered, we didn't, I didn't really understand how big it was because my parents were traveling. They were going. We were just young.

We're doing high school. And then I remember all of a sudden it was like, oh, people are like showing up to my basketball games, like lots of people. just like take pictures and like this is so weird or like track meets. Like we had to make like a rule at my school that people couldn't like follow me around at my sporting events and take pictures. Like it was just weird stuff that like we had never seen in our community. But it was like it happened a little bit after the shock of the show because it took a lot

to get into that small town because when you're not traveling, you don't see it as much. But when that started happening, I was like, oh, this is weird. So it didn't affect me as much. I feel like my freshman year as it started to later as the show continued to go on. Yeah. Did you go to public school? You're through all of that? I was just going to ask that.

So I went to a private school, but it was. But you were in school. Yeah, but I was in school. I was in school up until when I was a junior, I was on Dancing with the Stars. And then that's whenever I started to be homeschooled, but I still wanted to play sports. Because up until then, I thought I would go to college to play sports. That's what I was really passionate about. And I wasn't ready to really give that up yet.

And so I was like, well, how am I going to do this? You know, because what if this doesn't work out? And then I still want to go to college and I would like to do this. And so we worked out a thing with my school where I could do the school at home but still play sports for the school. So I still had involvement in school. But I did most of my work at home because when I was on Day Smith, Starris, I was out in L.A. for three months. And then traveled a lot. We did tours and all kinds of crazy stuff after that.

So it was, uh, I was in school, but not really. I can't believe you were that young on it. I didn't realize that. So you were 16, 17 max on dancing with the stars? Yeah, I just turned 17. I was 16 when I did my interview with them. Oh my gosh. And I was so awkward.

I don't even know how I got chosen because I was like the worst interview ever. I was so shy back then. Yeah. So quiet. And my mom came with me to the interview. It was like every question they asked me. I just looked at her. It was like, what's your name?

I'm like, oh, like, what's your name? I don't know. Like, I was like so nervous. And I was like, and I was like, so nervous. I remember thinking, I remember after my mom was like, well, I'm going to be on the show. You made me talk the whole job. She's like, she's like, what happened? Like, you blew it.

Not really. My mom's so sweet. But she was kind of like, you know, you might not get on. And that's okay. You know, you were a little quiet. But it was about two months later. That was in June. And then in August, I assumed I wasn't going to be on.

I already had seen them announcing people that were going to be on this season. And I was at a football game. Friday night football game was first football game of the season for our. school and I remember right after my mom said, hey, we just got a call and Disney Starz does want you to be on the show. They said you're a week behind everybody else, but they decided to add you to the cast and she said you'd have to fly out to L.A. tomorrow and you're going to have to start immediately. They're going to go do all your promo stuff and you have to go to New York for the Good morning America announcement. You go back and this was like, what? Like my life didn't look like

that before, you know? And I originally said no that night. I was like, no, I'm not doing that. It was terrifying. It's so scary, you know? And my mom was like, I remember my mom said, you know, if you have a legitimate excuse, then I'll listen. But if fear is your excuse, then fear is never a reason to not do something.

And I remember I really couldn't come up with anything other than I was terrified. My little sister also challenged me. She was like 11 years old at the time. And she said, Sadie. She said, is this the fear talking or is this Sadie talking? And it was like 11-year-old just said that to me. I was like, whoa. And it's just like two people in my life who are really significant,

kind of calling me out for how fear, this wasn't the first time that fear had led me to say no, to something I probably should have said yes to. And so the next day I said, okay, I'm going to do it. And so my older sister flew out to L.A. with me. We did literally Mark Ballas, picked me up from the airport, who was my dance partner. We went straight to the studio, put me in the, you know,

the bedazzled dress who did our picture. And then this was so embarrassing. But then right after that, they're like, who had to go film, like, your stuff for the commercial? And so they take me into the studio and it's like the stage and it's just so big. And everyone there is, like, filming you. And there's all the pro dancers and the producers. And they literally put you on stage and they turn on, shake it off,

but Taylor Sloat. And they said, just dance. Oh, boy. Oh, no. It sounds like your worst nightmare. Literally. Oh, yeah. No, me too.

And I didn't dance Like I wasn't a dancer I never done dance Like this was not my thing And I was like Okay Like What?

And I was like What should I do? They're like just dance I just be true to you It's like for the art commercial Y'all No joke I literally did the screen floor

That's all I could think And then I never forget I did this move Because I saw it in a One Direction video And I was like That's cool And I saw that Like that was literally

on the commercial for dancing with the stars. I was like, oh, wow. I'm looking this up after. Oh, my gosh. There was like a gift for years. I saw it like me doing like this mood. I was like, oh, wow. I mean, I was so, I was so out of my element.

And I remember thinking like my partner's thinking, oh, shoot, we're not making it. This is what I got stuck with. This is who I got stuck with. It was literally a miracle. I made it as far as I did. I would have never, ever thought that. Like my dad told me before going on. Just make it to like week three so you don't embarrass.

yourself, you know. I was just like, I'm just going to try to make it there. So it was a shock that I did well on the show. But yeah, that was high school for me. It was definitely crazy and interesting. And the show, you know, blew up a lot bigger than we ever thought it would. And I think that was just by the grace of God and what he was doing with our family and really cool to look back on.

Yeah. So something as you guys know that has been a huge part of my mental health journey, Taylor's Mental Health Journey Journeys as individuals and as a couple has been therapy. Amen. And that is why

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Yeah. It's convenient and they have great therapists. Yeah. And it's, it'll just keep you accountable. too. So we highly, highly encourage that you guys check out cerebral because therapy is just then wonders for us. And we know it'll do the same for you. To get started on your path towards better mental health, cerebral is giving our listeners 15% off their first month of online therapy, medication or both. Get started at cerebral.com slash podcasts and use code the squeeze to make

24 your best year yet. That's Cerebral C-E-R-E-B-R-A-L.com slash podcast and use code the squeeze. Offer is only valid on monthly plans. Other exclusions may apply. See C-Sy for details. Get going on that therapy. This is just out of curiosity because Taylor, he, you did like a year and a half, two years of high school and then. I think I finished my second year. It just got like too much for him. And he had to leave also because Twilight came out when you were sophomore. But even like, in his freshman year, he always like got picked on called Shark Boy. And like, did you have like a positive experience with it? Or were like in high school or were people like nice to you or were they not?

Like how was that? It was really hard. And it was really hard because, so I went to private school. So I had been at that school since I was in pre-K. So these people were like my best friends. I mean, they knew everything about me. I knew everything about them. We grew up together.

And it was, I always had a good experience. I loved school. And then I guess my family show started, like I said, it wasn't like at first because no one really realized how big it was. And my parents didn't let me have like a public Instagram at first. So I just didn't really know. And then when I started getting cool opportunities and started like missing school a lot to film the show, it started being like, well, why does she get to do that?

Yeah. And then, so that was kind of hard. But then it was like really hard whenever I remember. This is so dumb, but it was like such a big deal at the time. But, you know, you have like your places at lunch where you sit, like at the lunch table. And I had like my best friends I always sat with. And I remember I came back to school and I had, we had been traveling. We had been filming.

And they had like replaced my like spot. Like they like all moved in. And I remember I went to go sit and they just like looked at me like, no. Like you don't have a scene here anymore. Literally a scene from mean girls. I mean, it was. And I mean, I was like so upset. So then I didn't know what to do.

And my cousin, who is a guy, is in my grade as well. And he's always been, like, one of my best friends. So just went and sat with him. And then it was like, oh, she sits with the guys. Like, she's trying to be whatever. I was just sitting with my cousin. It was like everything I did was, like, so picked apart. Yeah.

So that was, like, super lonely. And I remember when I came back from Dancing with Stars, it was like my first time to see all my friends who weren't really my friends anymore, but they invited me to this birthday party. And I came and I remember this girl came out to me and she said, don't talk about it. Like, I was like,

no one wants to know. Oh. And literally no one asked me. Like, they never said like, how was it or what was it like? It was just like nothing. And so like that was like super,

super hard. Oh, sorry, my husband's over there telling me to tell a story. Let's hear it. Yeah. Well, because sometimes,

you know, you forget these kind of things. Yeah. Like, or, you know. Well, I got plenty of them. I've just pushed down.

I know. It's hard. So he was telling me to tell the story about basketball because basketball is my thing. I love basketball. I always played. And it got really hard with just people on my team and stuff like that. And then it got really hard because the schools we'd play, we'd like single me out. And so like, you know how boys are, like boys are rough on boys.

Like when you go to boys games, you expect the, just people to scream out things or whatever. But it's not like that at girls games. Like girls games, you just play basketball. And we had a couple of games where we would go. And this, the, I mean, it would just be packed. And everyone brought duck calls. And every time I would dribble, they blow the duck call. Every time I'd shoot, they would say quap.

Like, it was just like, and they had signs. And it was just, like, just mean. And it was just so bad. And, I mean, when you're in high school, girl, you're already insecure. And I remember, like, I would just cry, like, off the court. And I, and it really affected how it played. I mean, before all of that, I would, you know, easily score 25, about points a game. After that, it was like barely getting 10. I just couldn't. It was like,

so in my head. Really affected me. And never really recovered from that as far as sports went. I mean, I always struggled because I was just like new people were looking at me and saying things or whatnot. So high school was really hard. And I remember like crying because to my mom, because everybody would say like, you know, you meet your best friends in college or high school. Those are your lifelong friends in college. And I knew at this point, I wasn't going to go to college. And I was like, I'm never going to have friends, you know? And like, how are people? Like, just felt so misunderstood.

Yeah. And because friendships are something I value so much. And that was, like, so stripped. And I remember just telling God, I would rather you take all this away so I can just be normal and have friends if it means that, like, it's going to be this isolating. And I look back at that and so sad. But that is so not my life now. Yeah. I think, you know, a lot of that makes you who you are.

But it was definitely really hard at the time. Yeah. I had the same thing with, like, sports and stuff. Yeah. When I was in school, so I only did the first two years of high school. But I had the same thing where like when I would play in a football game or something, and everybody would have like Shark Boy signs or whatever. And then when I stopped going to school, I still wanted to like support my friends that were playing.

And I couldn't go to a game without the entire other side, like chanting, Team Edward. Or like literally, it was just a distraction to the whole game. and I eventually just stopped going to games. Yeah, because then you feel like responsible for taking away from the experience from your friends. And I felt the same way. It's like I don't want to even like fun things. Like, hey, we're going to this concert.

It's like, well, I don't want to go because I know if I go, then people are just going to take pictures the whole time. It's going to be annoying to everyone there. So then you choose not to go. But then it's like so isolating, you know? Yeah. So that's so hard. I totally relate to that and had the same high school experience.

High school. Yay. I know, it's tough, man. People that are like, these are the best years of your life. I'm like, nope, hey, for everyone listening, if you're in high school, just hold out if you think that's going to be the best and it's not good for you. There's more to come. Yeah. A lot more to come.

I also found that for me, the people in high school that were like the coolest people that you like were like, oh, I'd love to be them one day. This isn't true for everyone. But I look back at now and like they're doing. nothing. And like, it's just like, because the way that most people become popular in high school are not the right ways and not the ways that you become like successful and loved in life. It's not sustainable, like the actions and everything. And I also found some of the meanest people to me, some of them have come around and, you know, apologize and we've gotten to actually be friends. But some of them, it's like, I don't even know what they're doing. It doesn't even

matter, you know, it's like totally, I agree. Like some of the meanest and coolest people you look at now, you're like, that is so crazy. Yeah. But I mean, that's probably true. Like, that it is kind of cool that like you guys became famous, so to say, in high school. And like, you were able. Like, that's such a defining time. Totally.

You're like able to like weed out and like learn people's intentions early on. Totally. That young is really cool. Totally. I want to talk about fear. You touched on it a little. How is fear affected you do? Is that like the biggest thing that has affected your mental health? Have you always had fear when? Totally. Yes. Long question. But that's definitely the thing that has affected my mental life the most for sure. But I will say just before I even start saying this, because I know so many people walk with like crippling anxiety and I was there and I'll give you a little bit of a window into what that looks like. But I remember thinking I will never outgrow this. Like this is a part of who I am. I am an anxious person. I'm a fearful person.

It's part of my personality. And I think like the longer that I said those things over myself, I just excused that way of living and just kind of became comfortable in it. And what's amazing is that I sit here today, years later, and I am not a fearful person. And I'm not, like, that is not my story. That is not marked my life. I do not have anxiety like I used to have it. Do I get afraid?

Yes. And I think that's part of being human. If you don't get afraid, it's actually dangerous. You should have a little bit of fear in your life. but it does not define me. It does not call the shots for me. It does not drive my life. And so just as an encouragement to people listening,

fear is not just like a part of your personality. And it's not who you are. It might be affecting you. And it might be shaping a little bit of who you are, but it doesn't have to define you. And you really can't get out of it. Because I just remember thinking that just would never happen for me

because I was so afraid. And for as long as I could remember, I was afraid. I mean, when I was little, it would be like, no one's afraid at school when it rains. I'd be like, there's got to be a tornado. Like, just like worst case scenario kind of person. Yeah. But then when I grew up, it became like a lot bigger than that.

It was just like I was so anxious all the time. I have a fearless tattoo on my wrist because I would just constantly just be like grabbing my wrist. My hands would be shaky. I would think that I was, I don't know. I would think that I couldn't breathe even though I very well was capable of breathing. I would think that like I was going to pass that even. I was totally fine. Like I just always thought something bad was going to happen or feel.

for maybe there was reason to be afraid or maybe there was no reason at all to be afraid. I would be like physically feeling fear. And I think that started mostly whenever the show started happening and more so when I was on Dancing with the Stars because, you know, I had a lot of weird people following and that just got in my head and made me like overthink everything. And then I was actually in a pretty unhealthy relationship. And honestly, I think a lot of the anxiety that I had stem from living a really hypocritical lifestyle. It was like my life on social media looked really perfect. And my private life was not at all. And I think trying to live this kind of lie led me to being just extremely anxious.

And I think just my soul within me was just not at rest. because I was not living true. I was not living organically. And so that manifested its way in a lot of different ways and a lot of that was just anxiety attacks. I mean, it was just crazy. And I remember I would call on mom

when I was having an anxiety attack and she would always quote the scripture over me, do not fear for I'm with you, be not dismayed for I'm your God. I will strengthen you. I will uphold you on my righteous right hand as in Isaiah. And I just remember like not loving that

Because I just were like, you know, when people are like, hey, here's the Bible verse. You're like, don't be afraid. And it's like, yeah, like, good advice. Wouldn't that be awesome if I could just. I just can't stop being afraid. Like, I just didn't get how that was supposed to really affect or change my life. Yeah. And so one day I started really studying it.

And what I found was like so powerful, you know, there is a lot of places in the Bible that say, do not fear. And when you're afraid, especially if you walk in faith and in the Christian life, people would tell you all time, do you know how many times Bible says, do not be afraid? And you're like, yes, I get it. but I'm still scared. But I just remember, like, I really started looking into it. And it was, like, almost every time after God said, do not be afraid, it said, for I will be with you. And something shifted in me where I was like, oh, gosh, like, it's not just like he's commanding us to not be afraid. He's not just saying, like, don't be afraid that you should not be scared.

Like, you know, people make it sound. He's actually giving you this promise of himself saying you don't actually have to be afraid because I will be with you. And when you think about that, God will be with me. And if God means something to you, if God is God, if God is the creator of the universe and a strength and a shield and a protector and the great I am, then that's a big old promise, you know? And I just remember starting to be like, okay, I'm not going to focus so much on like the do not be afraid and trying to just drill in my mind to like stop being afraid.

I'm going to focus more on that like, okay, if God is with me, I don't have to be. And so started kind of shifting a lot of the way I was thinking and helped me a lot. But it wasn't really until honestly, I started living an honest life. I started weeding out that relationship that I was in. I started being more authentic on social media. I did a YouTube video. It's my first YouTube video ever where so stripped down, didn't have makeup on, wet hair, got out of shower, really just kind of was like brutally honest about my life

and what it looked like and my insecurities. And I wasn't planning on posting it. I didn't even have a channel. My little sister created me a channel to post it. She's like, you have to post this. Wow. And that video. went viral and it kind of like exposed like me for being me.

And although that seems scary, that is actually like the biggest breath of fresh air that could have happened to me. And fear started to just like slowly wash off. But I have to say like, again, not even that simple. I had to go to counseling. I went to Dr. Amen. I don't know if y'all. We just got our brain scan.

Oh, wow. Okay. So that like changed a lot for me. He just gave me like a lot of practical tips. really walked through what my brain had experienced and some of the trauma that I had experienced from fame and what that looks like. And it really was after that and making some practical life changes. Like again, living more honestly, stop drinking caffeine, like just simple things like that. And over the past, I guess since I've seen him, that was probably two years ago. I've only had one anxiety attack and it was in the middle of the night and it was just like a dream. Like it wasn't even like real. And I used to have them all the time. And I used to have them all the time. and two years I've had one. And so that's why I said at the beginning of this is like you actually can live like a life without being defined by fear, even if you're in the midst of it right now.

Because, I mean, gosh, there's nothing I could do to help you understand how severe it was at the time and how much fear and how it shaped everything about me. But now it's like doesn't, it's not, doesn't touch me. It's crazy. Yeah. Yeah. I'm a very fearful person, too, always have been. And I've, I definitely have not conquered it yet.

I'm still working on that. But something I did learn that like, at least just helped me live with it was for me, a lot of, a lot of, like, great things in my life did, like, come from fear. Or like, I found that, like, when you're scared of something. It's usually like a good thing. Like you told the story about dancing with the stars and you were like, no, I'm not doing it. When I was 17, I was asked to host SNL. And right away, I literally got a phone call from Lorne Michaels asking me if I will host SNL.

And I said, no, because I was terrified. I was like, I don't sing. I don't dance. I don't do accents. I don't know what I would do on Saturday Night Live. So I literally was like, thank you. so much, Lorne, but I can't do this. And then I hung up. And I think he like, text me or something. He's like, just think about it. And I thought about it. I slept on it. And even though I was still

terrified, I was like, okay, this is like a once in a lifetime opportunity. Yeah. Like, maybe some good will come from this. I don't know. I just like closed my eyes. And I was like, screw it. Let's do this. And it ended up being the coolest experience of my life. And like, and I feel like, it broke down so many walls that I had, just like, you know, telling myself, I can't do this. I can't do that. And that, you know, was when I was 17. And since then, things like that have happened over and over where, like, ridiculous six. I'm friends with Adam Sandler.

He called me. He was like, I got this crazy movie. You know, your character is wild. It's like no pressure to do it. But, you know, read the script. Read the script. I was like, definitely not. There's no way I can do that.

And it's one of my favorite projects I ever did. But I was terrified of it. I think fear, I think it really can be a good thing. I think if you lean into it, when I say fear doesn't touch me, I don't mean I am not affected by fear. I don't feel fear. I just mean, it does not call the shots for me. It is not own me. It's not making me sit in the corner or run off the airplane crying because I think it's going to crash.

I'm like, no, we're going. You know, like we're getting there. You know, it's not telling me. what I can and cannot do. And I think that a lot of people, it's like they wait for like this. Oh, it's like, because I feel fear, then maybe I shouldn't do it. But I'm like, no, like, sometimes like the piece is waiting on the other side of your trust, on the other side of your yes.

And like when you do it afraid, man, that's what builds your confidence to do other things, afraid. And I went through this like crazy time of my life where I was like, I'm just going to like own fear and I'm just going to like do scary things. And I was like doing like practical scary things. Like, okay, I want to go skydiving because this is just like scapeer. and I just want to like own it. And so I just did it.

And I was just like, man, like, it's growing my confidence that I can do things when I'm afraid. And still, like, I speak a lot of places. That's what I do. And people ask me, are you still scared? And I say, yes. And I say, but I love it. Like, I'm glad that I feel nervous because if I didn't feel nervous, then it would mean I didn't care. You know, like, those nerves and that fear is like, okay, I really care.

And I'm still going to say yes. And so it kind of goes back to what my mom said. You can have a lot of excuses not to do something. of them might be legitimate and real and yes listen to that but if fear is the only reason then you're doing it because fear should never drive the ship of your life and so i totally agree fear is at times a good thing to lean into there is a toxic fear of like i'm drowning in my anxiety or there is a healthy fear of like i feel it but it's not going to stop me yeah you just need to be the boss of your fear yes not the other way around yes own that fear how cool how cool of your

mom to like give you that advice too like that's just like that's so special of like her being like you can give me a real answer then you don't have to go but if it's just fear then you're doing like that's oh and I thought hard I was like all night I remember just thinking like what is my like my good excuse and just nothing it was like well it all went back to fear you know every other thing was like the root was fear and man I'm so glad and I was terrified all 11 weeks of dance with the stars every time I heard the click, click, click. And then the music turned on. I was like, how am I doing this?

But gosh, I look back at that. And I'm so thankful that I did it. Because again, it grows your confidence every time you do something afraid. It's actually a really powerful thing to challenge yourself to. Yeah, and such like once in a lifetime things like that for you. Yeah. S&L.

Like it's it's so true and helpful like honey and future baby get to look back at that. Like our kids will look back at all the stuff you've done one day. I just think that's like so special. It's so cool. And a good life lesson to show them and be like, I was terrified to do this. Like, you can go and conquer whatever because I couldn't do that. Yes. It really is so cool.

And it's so inspiring because, I mean, it's not relatable when people are like, oh, it wasn't scared at all. I just didn't. And you're like, good for you, man. But like, it's something really powerful to hear of somebody's day. I was actually terrified. But, like, I still did it. And I think that sometimes this generation, it's like we can be so quick to be like crippled by our labels that we place on ourselves. It's like, oh, because I'm anxious and I don't have to do these things.

I'm just going to excuse myself from that. It's like, no, like, you're stronger than that. Like, yes, the anxiety is real. Yes, it's bad. But you are stronger than that. And the more you say yes to doing it, man, the less it's going to have a grip on your life. Yeah. We've gotten a lot of like email requests of people wanting to have moms on, wanting to hear advice from moms.

What's people's adventure has been into motherhood. How has that been from you? Is there like something you learned about yourself or about just being a mom? mom that you didn't, you didn't maybe know going into being a mom. That's good. Oh, gosh. I love being a mom. It is like the greatest, it's been the greatest gift and the greatest treasure.

So we have an almost two-year-old name, and she is like, just as sweet as her name. It's like the perfect name for her when we, you know, decided to name her honey. It's a little bit of a different name. And then when people like meet her, they're like, she is honey. Like, that is so her. Yeah. And she just rocks it. So she's amazing.

I remember just becoming a mom, even just, you know, during pregnancy, it already begins to make you a new person. Like, it begins to shape who you are. I think it, it grows your capacity and your strength and your confidence. It made me a lot less, like, shallow and, like, thinking about myself so much less because it's such a selfless thing. You're constant, like, everything, all your attention goes to your child. And I remember it shaped, like, a lot of, like, body image things for me because your body, like,

makes on a whole new meaning. Like, no longer is, like, my stomach trying to look the flattest or the most fit. Now it's like, oh, wow, like, as it grows, I'm creating, like, life inside of me. Like, all of a sudden, every part of your body is used for the purpose of, like, another life. And so it just takes the focus off of you and puts it onto something so much greater. And that shifts so much of who you are. But I do remember speaking of mental health, that was probably one of the hardest times of my mental health was right after having honey. Okay.

And, you know, people say they go through like depression or anxiety like right after having their baby. And I did have bad anxiety after having honey. And it was, I think just a lot of the hormone changes and the craziness. For sure. I tried to keep working, like right after I didn't like give myself time. And you've got to give yourself time. And like I think one thing that it's taught me, though, is again. and what do you desire the most?

Like, what's the most important thing to you? And it helped me, like, stop and, like, prioritize my life better. Instead of trying to, like, manage everything, I'm like, okay, what really matters? My family, like my husband, my daughter, our family. That is my first ministry. That is my first job. That is my first love. And so really pouring time into that and then setting my work balance straighter and

literally going through a lot of changes within Live Original, which is my ministry, of like, okay, we need to hire more people. We need more people. We need people here and there. and doing all those things set me up to actually be at a place now where I get to just enjoy like our family and be the best mom I can be and do a good job my job. And I do feel like, you know, some people think, you know,

when they have a kid, they have so much mom guilt to like work and stuff like that. But I really do feel like God's called me to do what I do. And I think that if God's called you to something, like he will equip you for it. And I think he's giving me the capacity to be a great mom and a great boss. and I think you can do both. And Dr. Amon actually told me, because I started talking to her about mom guilt and just going back to work and how hard it is.

And he said, Sadie, if you raise your kids out of guilt, you will raise confused children who are entitled. And I was like, whoa. And he was like, because if you go home and you feel guilty for working and you just get them whenever they want and you just act out of guilt, they will be confused and they will be entitled. He was like, you need to be a confident parent. And learning how to be a confident parent,

was probably like one of the best pieces of advice for me. And when I look back, I think your confidence starts even whenever you're pregnant. Because, I mean, really, the whole journey is leading you to really be confident in your decisions because there's so many different ways you can go about things. Are you going to have a C-section? Are you going to have a vaginal birth?

Are you going to use formula? Are you going to breastfeed? Are you going to, you know, stay at home or you going to work? It's like all these things. And people will judge the heck out of you. People will have an opinion. Everyone will tell you what you should, what you shouldn't do.

And it really starts from the beginning of, I have to be confident in the decisions I'm making and the way that a parent and the way I love this child because no one loves this child more than I do. And I'm going to be confident in that. And so I think just for moms listening, like really focus on being a confident parent because being a confident parent is going to raise confident children. And I think being a confident, confident in your decisions and making decisions because you know it's best for your family is so important than listening to every opinion. And that's been a great gift to learn and to walk through. and had to walk through that the hard way in some areas, but got a lot better. That's so encouraging.

Okay. Last little point before we get into our 11-11. I'm just curious, what is your story behind the title, Live Original? Like, where did that come from? That's like, that is you. And I think of you. I think of Love Original. I think of Love. Like, what's the story behind that?

Yeah. This is such a good story. I'm glad you asked. So whenever I was young, I thought it was like the coolest thing in the world to have a nickname. I was like, only cool people have nicknames. I need a nickname. And my dad was like nickname king. Like, everybody had a nickname.

If you came in my house, like, you were going to have a nickname. All my best friends had nicknames. They were so cool. My brother had like 12. Like literally was like, pick the day, like new nickname. My sister had nicknames, but he never had a nickname for me. It was always just Sadie. And I was just like, dad, like, give me something.

Like, am I not cool? Is there nothing you think of when you see me or you think of me? And it like really bothered me. And my dad said to me, he said, Sadie, you're just the original. Like, you're just so original. You just, you're just you. And, like, that's enough. And I would just be like, no, that is not cool.

The original. What does that even mean, you know, at a young age? Like, what does that even mean? Yeah. And my dad just kept kind of speaking over me. And no, you're the original. That's who you are. Like, you're just you.

And that's a great thing. And so my dad, I remember he was traveling one day. And he saw, like, this sign. So, like, the original and he got it for me. And so, like, constantly something. that my dad spoke over me. And, you know, of course, when you're little, you don't appreciate that as much when you're older

and you realize, oh, my gosh, like, what a powerful thing that my dad would affirm in me that who I was created to be is actually enough. And I don't have to be known as anything other than me for that to be something of value. It's like the greatest message that your dad can speak over you. And so I remember whenever I was 16 and I'd actually gotten asked to speak somewhere,

and it went horribly. I was not a speaker. I hate a poet speaking. Again, I was so shy. I was so nervous. Like, my personality is so different now than it was then just because of fear. When you get rid of fear, it changes a lot of things about who you are. And so my brother and I went to speak just because we were the Doug Dynasty kids.

And I was supposed to speak for 30 minutes. I was probably on stage for maybe 10. And no joke, the people asked for their money back. It was that bad. Stop it. So I had a very humble beginning when I was speaking. And I came back home. I told my mom.

I said, I'm never doing it. again. That was horrible. That was clearly not my calling. What jokes on me because that's what I do now. I was like, that was like literally the worst. She's like, Sadie, but like you're such a good example and like you have so much wisdom. And like, it would just be so great if you could encourage young girls. I was like, yeah, but not like that because that was horrible. And my mom was like, well, I mean, you just, you know, like, we need to practice.

I was like, no. No, that was just so bad. And I was like, well, I was like, but it would be really cool if I could write a book. I was like, because like maybe I could put all this like advice at 16 that I had in a book. Mom said, well, that's a great idea. And she said, well, what do you want to call it? And I was like kind of thinking. And I started thinking about what my dad said. And we started talking about the original.

And my mom said, well, you could call it live original and encourage girls and being confident in who they were created to be. It was so cool that day. Like within an hour, I had like 10 chapter titles, like the whole idea for the book. I was like, this is the book. I guess I was 15 when that happened. because I started writing the book, my sophomore year of high school, with the co-author. I didn't do all by myself with the co-author. She was awesome.

And we wrote the book, Live Original. Well, again, I was famous from Duck Dynasty, but not super, super known for just me. Yeah. And then the book came out in October, which happened to be right when I was on Davis for the Stars. So it, like, exploded. Like, the message just went out. Wow. And from there, Live Original became a ministry.

and the irony of me saying, I'm never going to speak. I'm going to write a book. Because of the book, Live Original, I started speaking about Living Original. And it was just so cool because, gosh, I mean, I really had to take my own message to heart. I was really writing everything.

I was writing to me more than I think I was writing it to anyone else. I think that's the power behind the message. You know, it is very original. It's very honest and vulnerable. And it was at that same time that I did the YouTube video, it was like all of a sudden I was like, you know what? going to own who I really was originally created to be. I'm not going to try to be who other people

say I need to be. I'm not going to try to be who other people want me to be. Because at that time, you know, everybody wants you to be who they want you to be. I said it like this when I was younger. I was like, I feel like everybody else knows who I am but me. I feel like everybody's like, oh, Sadie, say you, say, but I don't know who that is. And the message of Live Original helped me discover who God really created me to be and own that. And it changed my life. And so, It's just an incredible blessing that it continues to change girls' lives and people all over the world. But it definitely started with me and I'm grateful for that. That's so awesome. I have two points. One, I feel like I just relate to that so much because I wouldn't define myself as a confident person,

but I've never, I don't really ever get jealous. I'm not really like easily bald. I've always just been myself and I've been fine with that and just confident in the fact that I am me and if you like me, you like me, if you don't, whatever. And I feel like that. that like resonates so much and like young girls, they get to hear that from you now, like, how encouraging that is. Because I felt that about myself in junior high, high school, college, but I didn't like know it to the fullest that I do now. So I just think that's so cool because like, you're you. No one else is you. Like you need to just be confident in that. And obviously, maybe there's things you don't like about yourself, but like you were made like uniquely to be you.

There's no one else that is you. So I just love that message. But the other thing I was going to say is September 8th and 9th. I am so beyond honored to be going to low conference. But I have to tell you, I've been like praying and wanting to do something like that. So it's just, it's hysteric. I was reading my Christine Kane devotional. And then I prayed for success. And then later that day, Steph emailed me. Wow. We were in Franklin. We were in. No way. So a big, a big reason behind it, why I do what I do. Obviously, nursing had a very big toll on my mental health. But my best friend, from high school Jared who he suffered bipolar and took his life. He's a very large reason why I do what I do. I have his photo on my desk. Oh, that's awesome. He inspires me like to do what I do.

And when we started talking about the conference and you're like, it's in Monroe, I had this moment and I'm like, God is so funny. Jared's last name is Monroe. No way. And like this is like something that I have been feeling that like I want to do. And I think. God has a plan for it. And it's just so funny that like the first thing is literally in Monroe. The first thing is in Monroe. And I do what I do because of Jared. So I had to just share that with you.

She started all of this. Lemons, the squeeze. All of it really started because of Jared. And then, you know, there's been plenty of things since. But like that was how this started. And she's been wanting to like do something, you know, like she's going to do at low. And it's just crazy that the first one you're ever going to do is in the place that is literally his name. Okay, let's head into our 11 11.

Let's do it. Our favorite 11. Do you want to do odd even, even odd? Sure, I'll start it off. Okay, great. Hit us. Okay, here we go. Number one, this one's fun.

What movie or song title best describes your mental health today? That was good. Okay, so I saw some of these questions before, I have to say. But the first thing I thought of was people are shocked to know this, but one of my favorite genres to listen to is Christian rap. Yeah. And there's a song called Good Lord by Andy Minio. And it is like, that is totally like my mental health. Like I love it.

It makes me dance. It's so fun. But he's like basically saying like, even if everything goes wrong, I still got a good lord. And I like love it. And I was like, that's kind of my mental health. And I'm like, you know, even if I feel this way, I still got a good lord. Like he's up my size. So today's not my best day, but I got a good lord.

Oh my gosh. Wait, he's like the coming in hot guy. Yes, yes. Andy Minio, he's the best. Like Andy Minio, like this is Andy Minio on Spotify is like my thing. Oh my gosh. You got a new genre. Yeah, here we go.

Christian rock. Okay, number two. How open are you with the people in your life when you're struggling? I am actually super, super open. And my mom always says she's like, Sadie's greatest superpower is she tells everybody everything. And I think that that is a superpower whenever you know who to tell what to, you know, so I don't tell everybody, everything.

I think that a lot of people probably think I do because I am vulnerable and I share hard things on platforms, but I do not share everything on big platforms. I think there's a difference between being transparent and vulnerable. And I'm definitely really vulnerable to my friends and my family and then I'm more transparent to the world, I don't know a little bit, but not everything. Yeah. But I think that that is such a great, uh, strong. strength is to be able to open up to the people around you because, man, the scariest place to

be is alone and in hiding. And so, I mean, I encourage everybody if you have one friend to tell what you're going through. The Matt Chandler preached this message one time. And he said, you can let people know 99% of your life, but if you still have the one, then that one will eat you up. And he's like, tell somebody the 1%. And doing that has really helped me just with my husband and my mom, my close, close people has been a gift. I love that. Okay, number three, what is your favorite part of your morning or night routine? Okay, so this question is funny because, like I said, I'm not a routine person.

And I have to say, one thing that I think has been a game changer for me is to stop putting the pressure on myself to have a routine. Yeah, for sure. Because then I'm like constantly disappointing myself that I don't keep my routine. But with honey, it's made me a little bit more routine because, you know, she drives on routine. Yes, she thrives more on routine. She's not super structured. She's like me. She can go to bed kind of whenever.

But we always read a book and watch Little Bear at night. Like Little Bear is a thing. So every night we watch Little Bear. And if we don't, she's like, she just couch, like, couch. Like we're watching Little Bear. And it's like the best. And so I like really look forward to every night watching Little Bear with Honey. And like, that's just the sweetest.

Christian said that and I will all three watch Little Bear together. He's like, this is like my favorite time in the whole life. And I was like me too. Like it's really like the best days of our entire life. Just watching Little Bear with Honey and all the just joys of being parents right now. It's just been sweet, hard sweet. Yeah. It's such a special time.

I could only imagine for both of you like how much you want to soak up those moments. Oh gosh. They just grow so fast. So fast. Years from now you're going to wish you were on that couch washing Little Bear. Trust me. I know. I cry.

Like if I'm like, we're not going to watch a little bear, but thankfully we'll have another kid coming. So Little Bear will continue. They're going to be like 10. We're going to be like, you want to watch Little Bear? And like, Mom, no. Okay, a new movie, but we got to watch something. Like, it's so fun. Oh, my gosh.

That's so tender. I love that. How has your career impacted your well-being? Gosh, I think that my career has put to my well-being a lot after I started doing what I really felt called to do in a positive way. I think for a long time I was just saying yes to everything because it was like, exciting. But when I got really specific on, this is what I'm doing and this is why I'm doing it and I started doing that fully, gosh, it made me such a, honestly, a better person. Because like I said, everything I'm doing right now is challenging me. The books that I write, the first person

I'm writing it too is me, the messages that I preached, first person that needed to experience that was me. The app that I created is because I needed something like that. You know what I'm saying? It's like, it's impacting me because it's stuff. that I feel like I needed to change my life and it's helping other people change theirs. So it's impacted me in a huge way. And I think it's kind of been my own accountability in a lot of ways. Yeah. That's awesome.

Yeah. I can relate to that a lot. Just like, you know, when you first get all these awesome opportunities, you know, when you're working just to work, it's not fulfilling. Yeah. And I definitely went through that stage where I was doing all these awesome things. And you would think that brought like happiness. But it doesn't. And only recently in my career, like when, you know, and I'm blessed to be able to do this,

but to be able to pick and choose, you know, to do things that I want to be doing. Yes. And I'm passionate about working with people that I want to work with. Yeah. That's, you know, that was the change for me. That definitely changes everything when you start doing the things that really represent your heart, you know, what you want to do for sure. All right.

Number five. What is the most misunderstood thing about you? Gosh, this one was hard. When I read this, is like, what is the most misunderstood thing about it? I think, like, whenever you are known to a lot of people, you kind of have to get okay with the fact that you're going to be misunderstood. And I think the more soon in your life that you can be okay with the fact that people will misunderstand you and not let that change you or not let that work you up or worry you,

I mean, the faster you can do that, the better. I remember a mentor told me, she said, Siddy, just let the fruit of your life do the talking. And that was so good for me because, you know, when people are misunderstood, you want to defend yourself. You want to over-explain yourself. And, you know, I just have to let the fruit of my life do the talking. And so I couldn't think of something, like, super specific.

But, I mean, I think it's just a lifetime of being misunderstood. Like I said in high school, I felt so misunderstood. I felt like they felt like I was choosing, this over them and I'm like literally all I want is for you to like be my friend like I need you more than this but you know that's just the start of being misunderstood I'm constantly misunderstood now for doing the things that I do and why I do them or whatnot but I just always hold to like let the fruit of my life do the talking and I'm doing what I know is like best and true to the truth to the truth of my ability in my heart and it represents me and I don't regret that I'm not living

a double life anymore I'm living an honest life and that's the case and you know and to I agree to distance. Yeah. Yeah. So true. I'm going to flip this question onto you because you asked me, what is the greatest advice you've ever been given? Yes, my favorite question. So I always ask everybody in my podcast this question because that's actually how my podcast started was me and my mom were at this event at like a sorority.

And this girl asked me what's the best piece of advice that I've ever been given. And I answered it. And it was, I'll still say the same piece of advice. But my great grandma, she's still alive. She's 91, almost 92. She's a legend. She's just so beautiful, so wise, so incredible. It's actually one of the reasons we name Honey Honey,

is because she has this southern voice and she calls all of us Honey. And it's just like her thing. Wow. But she said to me one time, I came home. I was so worked up about something. And I contend to be a little dramatic, you know. I'm a dramatic storyteller. And I was just all, can you believe that this person, this person,

and blah, blah. And she said, Sadie, because I said, well, what should I do? Like, how should I respond? You know, like, what's my move? What's my next move? She said, Sadie, you are not kind to people because other people are kind to you. She said, you are a kind because that's who you are. Because you are a kind person.

And it was just like such a slap in the face and a hug. You know, at the same time, I was like, wow, like, I'm not kind out of response of other people being kind to me. I'm going to be kind because that's who I am. Yeah. And it was just a really good thing because you can take that into everything in life. It's like I'm not going to respond out of emotion. I'm not going to respond out of what you give me. I'm going to respond out of who I am.

And I think going back to even the misunderstood thing and so many things that the world can put on you, when you stop responding to things because of what other people are giving you and you respond to people because that's who you truly are, man, it's the best way to live because it helps you live with that integrity, not up and down an emotional roller coaster. Such integrity. And so anyways, I said this at the event. I gave this advice. My mom had a mic on that she couldn't move.

It was like, attached her head. And she was just like so in the moment. And she went, whoa, that's good. And literally we go backstage. I said, Mom, that was so funny when you saw that. Everyone started laughing. Oh, my gosh. And she was like, I know.

It was so funny. It was like, mate, that could be my podcast. Because we've been talking about what should my podcast be called. What should the theme be? And we decided to title, whoa, that's good because of my mom doing that. Oh, my gosh. And then ask people the question, what's the best piece of advice you've ever been given? That's awesome.

Isn't that funny? That's like an organic. moment of my mom just been like, whoa, that's good. And I was like, that's good. That's really good. That's really good. Oh, my gosh. That is so cool.

Yeah. I love that. Okay. Number seven. What does wellness mean to you? Wellness. These questions, I said this before we got on. I was like, this is the best like car ride conversations.

Like, gosh, I think that my husband would be a really great one to answer this question. And I'll say what it's become to me. because before Christian, I didn't have like the greatest view on like health and wellness because I went through a time of my life where I just had really disordered thinking on eating and my body image and all that kind of stuff. Yeah. And I think because I was so unhealthy then and didn't eat a lot and overworked out and over exercise and all that kind of stuff, I was like, well, now I'm just going to go the complete opposite way

because I'm not going to live like that anymore. And I'm like, freedom. And like freedom to me was just like eat whatever you want, do whatever you want. And then that was really unhealthy. So then I was like, both ways were unhealthy. I was like unhealthy because I wasn't eating and I was working out way too much because of this obsession with wanting to look a certain way or be a certain way and just kind of control something.

And then it was like totally unhealthy on the other way because I was like, well, no, I'm just going to do whatever I want and eat whatever I want. And I felt like crap, you know? Yeah. And so when I met Christian, I was like scared of stepping into health and wellness because I'd never viewed it in a good way. So I had never had good balance with it. I never viewed it as something healthier a way that it could really, like, actually impact me.

But he had such a healthy view of it. And Christian's just wellness overall. I mean, not just physically, but spiritually and mentally and all of it. He just had such great discipline. Like, he worked out not because it was, like, achieving just a goal, but because, like, it made him feel good because he loved it because it was fun to him. Gosh, he read his Bible all the time because he loved to because that's just what he went, not because he had to, you know?

his emotional, his mental health is like so impressive to me. Because like I just never met somebody who like wasn't anxious. So you know, like just so chill. And I was like, you really are not scared to me? Like you're just chill. Like he just, now that he's not scared of anything, but he just had like such good wellness. But a lot of that was because of the discipline that he had set in a place.

And so being married to him has been like really inspiring. And it gave me a love for working out that I didn't have before because it wasn't about anything unhealthy. It was truly about just health. And what I found was, so I were working out in the mornings, and it changed my perspective on things. It's where I thought the most. Like, I asked my trainer if we could turn on worship music, and I would leave working out and just have, like, the best thoughts. It's like where half my Instagram captions would come from and, like, my messages would come from just because it was just, like, healthy for me.

And then spiritual wellness, just, you know, doing, like, spending time with God because I desired to, not because I had to. That began to change me. Emotional wellness, all of it. And so Christian helped me get on a good. balance with that because I don't think it's healthy to obviously start yourself as not healthy either to just indulge in all things because that doesn't even feel good but when you have a fresh perspective and fresh eyes and accountability whether it's your husband a best friend or somebody that really helped me yeah it's a good answer yeah yeah props um number eight

what is your relationship with social media and do you think it affects your well-being It's good. My relationship social media is funny. I think that's probably a misunderstood thing about me. I think people probably think that I'm like super into social media because I have a large platform. But over the years, I've gotten less and less, I guess, into social media. I wrote a whole book on social media called Who Are You Following?

And it was really challenging to me to write that book because I think that, you know, with almost everything in life, you can call the older generation and ask you. advice for and they can give you pretty solid advice because of things they walk through. And I'm all about generations. I'm all about asking mom, asking grandma, asking great grandma, like, what do you think about this? But with social media, like, we had no guide, no direction. It's just like, hey, young people figure it out. It's not going well, you know, for us. When you look at the statistics, you know, that has a huge effect on your mental health. And so I just remember being like, man, I want to give some direction into this. And I learned a lot

from it. And so what's cool, though, is like through that this past year, I feel like I was exposed to a couple of just unhealthy things that social media had on me. Now, here's the thing I have to say, right in this book, I always say this. I am not like anti-social media. I'm just like pro-healthy social media. Yeah. And I think to have healthy social media, you have to be a healthy version of you. Yeah.

And I think that it really does start within. And so I love social media for all the good that it can bring, but I hate it for all the bad that it can also bring. And I think you have so much more control of it than you think you do. So anyways, say, let's say, I'm at a place right now currently with my social media where I'm actually taking a break. My team is running my social media. And I said that at the beginning of the year, everybody knows like my team's running it. They're just posting more work things and stuff.

And I'm taking actually like the whole year off, which I hadn't like that's great said that because I'm not like making a big deal about it. But I felt like I've had this in my life since eighth grade. It's been such a huge part of my life. And I just want to see what happens when I strip it away. And just in the first to a month and a half, it's been really good for me. I think it's exposed a lot in me that I didn't even realize I thought about.

I didn't even realize, like, took so much time in like my mental space. Yeah. And even the lies of like, well, if I take a whole year of all of it, I'll be a real of it. Or I'll take a whole year of life. Like, how many fathers I'm going to lose

or I'm going to lose my algorithm? Like, all those things. And I'm like, I mean, how much weight does that really carry in my life, you know? Yeah. And so being willing to just lay that down and surrender that. Gosh, it's been really good. It's been really good for our family.

just getting to, like, be totally present when I'm home. That's what I really started feeling convicted of is last year I was like, oh my gosh, I'm sitting here. I was tired. I was home from work. I was just exhausted laying on the couch. I'm like scrolling social media and honey he's playing in front of me. I'm not watching her.

And I was like, I'm literally like watching everybody else's life by my own. And that really convicted me. And started making me feel like, hmm, something's got to change. So I'm kind of in a new, fresh phase of social media right now. That's awesome. My answers are so long. No.

I like such good car right questions and I'm taking forever. Oh, I'm for it. I've never thought about it like that with like the generation thing. Yeah. Like there's so much to learn from each generation of humans. Yeah. And I've never thought about it. Well, my mom and I have always like talked about it.

She's like why I think it's also a generational thing because I think like our parents' generation didn't really talk about mental health. It's very much like our generation thing. But she's like, why are so many of your friends like depressed or angry? or all this stuff. And I'm like, well, like, social, I fully believe social media has such a large aspect. Even if you're following, like, healthy stuff sometimes, like, our brains aren't meant to consume the amount we're consuming.

Like, that's not, that's not healthy for us. And, like, it could be unhealthy in the sense of your following accounts that aren't bettering in your mental health and are making you think less of yourself. But also, even if you're not, you're just scrolling aimlessly for hours. That's also, that's bad for you too. My accounts were great. You go on to my social media. You go to church.

Like, everyone's so encouraging. It's not even that. It was just the mental space it was taking. Yeah. And, like, I realize I've never given my brain a break. Like, literally every, like, quiet moment I have, I'm scrolling, which is, like, not even quiet then at that moment, you know, because then it's like you're getting all this input.

And there are direct studies that show so much of how it's affected our mental health. And I feel like it's just like the blind leading the blind. It's like, oh, well, it worked for her. And it's like, well, what is your idea of success? Is it having a blue check? Is it having a follower? But at what expense? You know, like what is working, you know?

And so, yeah, I think shedding light on what actually is good about social media and the balance you have to have is like so important. And I think it's a journey. You know, we're all on. It's the first time a generation's gone through this. So you have to learn as you go. And I like to think of things like in the long run. Yeah. And I'm like, okay, a year right now might seem like a long time.

But in the long run, it might totally reshape how I view this. Yeah. I go about it in such a healthier way. And so I think, you know, looking at things not as like instant success, like so many of us look at and fast things and just be like, you know what? We have time. Let's just like give ourselves the time to actually do this well and right. Yeah. Number nine.

What is your favorite form of self-care? Oh, that's a good question. I think my favorite form of self-care is honestly just hanging out and my family and doing the things that like I love to do. Like brainless activities. Like we love playing cards. We love playing tennis. like things that just make me like not really think about anything is like a gift and a great form of self-care. And yeah, just hanging with honey watching her be funny because she's just hilarious, which I know that's not like self-care in the sense of like getting a massage, but those are the kind of things that actually like fill me.

Yeah. Yeah. That's so true. We have a friend that she gets fueled from like talking with people. Yeah. And Taylor's like the complete opposite of that. And he's like that doesn't fuel me. But her is like when she's in social settings, like that's what she's also. an eight on the enneagram

is that's just her personality. So she's very much fueled by that. But it's just, it's such a person by person thing. Oh yeah. For me, like having people over at our house is like my favorite thing.

Yeah. We have a group over every Wednesday night and we watch sermons. We hang out. We make dinner. We play cards. And like those are just like the best. Yeah.

For me. It just, it definitely fuels me. Okay. Second and last one. Number 10. Who is that the most positive impact on your mental health? I've had to say,

well, my husband's sitting over there. He used to be like really. really if I don't say him. But no, he just mouthed your mom. It's true. My mom has. My mom walked with me through all that anxiety, like a champ.

I mean, there's a chapter of my book, Live Fearless, called A Friend of Fear. And it's talking about being a friend of someone walking through fear and anxiety because it's really hard. You don't know what to do. You know, sometimes you don't know what to say. And when I look at the way that she handled it with so much patience and grace and never making me feel crazy for feeling fear, but also never letting me sit in it. Yeah.

It was just, she had the best balance of that. And it's been awesome. That's really special. Last but not least, number 11. If you could go back to one moment in your life, what moment would that be? And what would you say to yourself? So this is a good question because I think you could go either way. You could go back to the best moment of your life or you'd go back to some of the hard moments your life.

And I had like a flood of memories whenever I saw this question because I was thinking of some of the good moments that I would say don't be so hard on yourself because I can tend to be really hard in what. myself and always think I could have done something better. But I thought about what the most significant time of life I would have gone back to and gave myself a little pep talk was whenever I was single. And I would have told myself to chill out. I would have been like, stay single. Like I was constantly trying to get in relationships. I was constantly getting into relationships.

I went through just like having a boyfriend breaking up. Next week, have another boyfriend breaking out. It was like constant because I so desired to get married at a young age and I wanted a family. And I was like so desperate for that. And I just wish I would have chilled and settled in the singleness because now I look at that time of my life. I'm like, man, what a gift, you know, to be single and to have time to get to know who you are. And talking about that originality. Like, to get to know who you are originally, you got to have like no distraction, you know.

You got to really be able to be okay with who you are and content with who you are. And so I definitely would have gone back to that season in my life. It's almost up to chill out. So most of God has a plan. And, you know, people say, you know, you're going to find the one or whatever. I just think that so many of us think that we really do have to find the person. And I really think if I was truly like looking, I don't think I ever would have found Christian. Like, I don't think it was in my hands at all.

Like, I think it was so God. And we literally ran into each other one day so organically at the beach. And it was like so perfect timing for him and me to meet because if we wouldn't have any other time, it just wouldn't have been the right time. And we just were super, I don't know. It was just like, we just hit it off so well. And we became friends. And it just happened so naturally. And I think I had this expectation of what it was going to be.

And it was just so much more natural and organic than that. And so I would have just told myself, just wait, you know. And, you know, people always ask me questions about singleness. And I always say, I wish I could give you good advice because I lived it. I'm going to give you good advice because I did the wrong thing. Yeah. Just wait and be patient. Yeah.

Oh, my gosh. I love that. I relate to that. I answer a lot. I love that. Well, thanks for hanging. with that. Yes. The squeeze is awesome.

I can't wait to watch this episode back. I'm already like so excited. No, myself just learned so much just from listening to you talk. And I'm sure everybody else did too. So thank you so much for being here. Y'all are awesome. Y'all are such good interviewers and not really do make it so fun and just like so homey. And squeeze is awesome.

Thank you. Thank you. Thank you so much for squeezing us into your day. Please be sure to rate, review, and follow our pod and check out full episodes on YouTube. You can follow me at Taylor Lautner, my lovely wife, at Taye Lautner. Check out the squeeze on Instagram at The Squeeze. And also give a little glance and a follow to Lemonsby Tay. That's at Lemonsbytee on Instagram and lemonsbytea.com.

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