The Squeeze - Tay Lautner: Getting to "The Squeeze"

Episode Date: February 1, 2023

TW: drug addiction, bipolar disorder, suicide, medical trauma, death  Welcome to the first episode of The Squeeze! Actor Taylor Lautner introduces and interviews his wife, registered nurse Tay Lautner, as the two discuss her mental health journey, career as a nurse in the thick of the pandemic, and why she wanted to start this podcast. They also discuss the genesis of the Lemons by Tay blog and The Lemons Foundation, her nonprofit organization with the same mission as this podcast: to build a community that supports and encourages those struggling with their mental health, and provide a place to share resources along the way. The two then introduce a recurring segment of the show, The Lemon 11: eleven great questions that will facilitate inspiring, intentional conversation. When life gives you lemons, what do you do with them? Over here at The Squeeze—we talk about it. Thanks for squeezin’ us in!  Thanks to our awesome sponsor for making this episode possible:  HelloFresh — Go to HelloFresh.com/thesqueeze65 and use code thesqueeze65 for 65% off plus free shipping  To send us your questions or share your story, you can email [e-mail].  Be sure to rate, review, and follow the podcast, and subscribe on YouTube so you don't miss an episode! Plus, you can follow us on Instagram, @thesqueeze and personally @taylautner and @taylorlautner. To learn more from The Lemons Foundation, follow @lemonsbytay on Instagram and visit lemonsbytay.com  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

When life gives you lemons, what do you do with them? Over here at The Squeeze, we talk about it. What's up, everyone? I'm Taylor Lautner, and I would like to introduce you to somebody who inspires me and so many more on a daily basis. She is a registered nurse, founder of Lemons by Tay, the Lemons Foundation, and The Squeeze Podcast, loving dog mama of two. And last but certainly not least, my wife. Taye Loutner. Hi. Hi.

Welcome to our first episode of Squeeze. Yeah. I can't believe we're actually doing this. You feel good? Yeah, I do. I'm curious what you're about to throw at me. All right. Well, before I start grilling you with super tough questions.

Okay, great. I do want to take a moment to remind you how proud I am of you. Did I have grabbed tissues? No. God. You're a boss. and already at 25 years old, have some pretty bomb accolades. But those aside, I am most proud of the human that you are.

You have a heart of gold, and anyone lucky enough to know you and have you in their lives would agree with me. From not only me, but everyone watching or listening right now, thank you for all that you do, and thank you for sharing your heart with all of us. All right, now we're going to jump in. Okay. Before we get to the squeeze and what inspired you to do the podcast, I'd like to go back a little bit further. Mental health, we both know this for anybody that's watching and doesn't.

Mental health has been something that Tay has been passionate about for a while, but increasingly in the last few years, can you share with everyone where the importance of mental health stemmed from for you, just from the beginning? All the way from the beginning? I think it's important. I mean, it's, yeah, like, in the last few years, it's been something that both of us have talked about a lot more, but I think it's just hit us in the last few years. But I think mental health stems for everyone from much further back than that. So I think it's important to, like, start a little bit.

little bit from the beginning because that's where it started like it's where the passion started growing inside of you. Yeah, I guess my most impactful kind of earliest memory of mental health was my cousin Chris. He struggled with heroin and I watched him be addicted to it, struggle with it, struggle with it to the point where he overdosed and almost died. He was in ICU for a bit and my parents had taken me to go visit him. How old were you? I was only eight. Around there. I can't remember exactly. But I was young. Definitely questionably young to be brought into something like that. Yeah, brought into an ICU. But he was hooked up to all the things, had all the tubes. And it kind of scared the crap out of me. I remember leaving, like, leaving the hospital, driving home. I didn't know

what the feeling was. I think it was like the first time I ever experienced sadness, but like intense sadness or just like confusion and a lot of things because on that car rider, I kept like grabbing my throat and I was like, like, I felt like I had tubes in me and like my throat was hurting really bad and like, I guess I don't know, sympathy. I don't know what it was. But. I just remember being so confused as to like why he let himself like get to that point. Because I mean, that's impossible to understand when you're eight years old. Yeah, you don't understand like what addiction is or what drugs are or any of that. But I was just so confused like how he got there.

So I guess that's kind of like the most impactful thing from my childhood. I had a lot of family members struggle with addiction and definitely watching that and learning and not really understanding it. Kind of formed my view of mental health before I even knew was mental health. Yeah. And then fast forward to high school, my closest guy friend, his name was Jared. He struggled with bipolar, which not a lot of people knew. I didn't even know at the time. And I absolutely loved him.

He was like, he was the guy friend that could slide in between like me and my high school boyfriend. He was like, he was just like, he was just Jared. He came after every. rally or like dance. I was on dance team. So after all of that, he come over and just hug me and tell me how good of a job I did or if I was feeling insecure. He would remind me how beautiful I was and just very loving and endearing. Never like, wasn't like hitting on me, but he just like, he loved me. And in college, we graduate, go off to college, I get a call from my best friend and she was just like, Jared's dead.

And I was like, what? She was like, Jared killed itself. And I was like, wait, what? Like, I still remember, like, sitting at the dining table making flashcards for my anatomy and physiology class. Like, I remember exactly what I was doing. And, like, that moment, I was like, what? And she, like, proceeded to tell me what happened. And I was definitely, like, in shock.

Like, I didn't cry right away. I was just very confused. also because I had just learned that he was struggling with bipolar. I didn't know. So you learned that before you got this call. Mm-hmm. So, because I was going to ask in your wildest dreams, could you ever see that happening to him?

Or did you learning the bipolar of it? Were you a little bit worried? Yeah, I didn't. I mean, I never thought that would ever happen. He was always like the happiest, most loving. Yeah. person he brought in a room when he walked in it. So no, I never, never foresaw that, never knew that he struggled with that. Most of us didn't, honestly, that went to school with him.

That happened kind of right before I started nursing school. I was studying to get in a nursing school. But that was a, that was really a big one for me. He's a large, I'm looking at the photos of him on my desk right now. Um, he's a large reason why. Yeah. Oh, I get emotional. That's okay. Um, he's definitely a large reason why I do this. Yeah.

Yeah. That's why you're sitting here right now. Yeah. Yeah. I love you. I love you. Oh, brother. Yeah, I feel like it, it goes back a ways, even, even though you probably didn't know at that

time and it kind of took like this buildup of things happening within you yeah for it to like your shell to like crack and realize you know what you're struggling with and what you want to to do for the world yeah because then i'm going to jump forward again when we met very end of 2017 beginning of 18, you had just started nursing school. Mm-hmm. And you worked your booty off for two years. And that's kind of, that's how we got to know each other. Yeah.

As you're, you know, grinding through nursing school. And then correct me, was it 2020 or end of 19 when you graduated? End of 19. Yeah, yeah. And then. And then I took my, technically I graduated and end of 2019, but then I took my NCLEX in 2020. Okay. And, yeah.

So you literally start nursing right at the beginning of 2020. Yeah. When everything hits. And you originally wanted to go into the hospital as a telemetry nurse. So am I saying it wrong? You can correct me. That was, no, that's, that's correct. If I told myself if I did want to work in a hospital, that's, that's what it would be. And only at this one hospital that I loved during clinicals. But yeah, I wasn't planning on working in the hospital when I graduated. I was planning on doing more of like an OR type thing. But then all of those shut down because of COVID. So then I was kind of like, I have all this knowledge from school. I just learned all this stuff. So I'm just. going to apply to this one place. And if I get it, then I'll get it. And you were praying that I

wouldn't get it. What? No. No, yours obviously support me and like encourage me and whatnot. But obviously. I knew it would be a major life change for us. And that was something we were just going to have to adjust to. But segue, you had to adjust to something. And that is going into the hospital for the first time right out of nursing school thinking you're going to be on a telemetry unit and COVID had other plans. Can you share with everyone what it was like finding out that all your plans to that point were flipped upside down and for the foreseeable future you'd be going into work every day trying to save lives from this horrible virus? Yeah. I mean I think at first I wasn't I wasn't like, ah, crap, we're COVID now.

I mean, obviously, I was like, this is going to be a little bit more annoying because I have to put all this PPE on and like it's going to take more work than what my normal floor would be. PPE is. Personal protection equipment. You know, it's the masks. We would wear an 95 all the time. But then you have to put a mask over that and then goggles and the shield. And then you put a gown on. Yeah.

She would literally come home from her shift and like, the nose and you've probably seen like photos or videos of this online but it's like real she would come home she'd have like indents all over her face that's how like tight in this was yeah which is good but yeah sure it was tough yeah i knew it was going to be tedious um yeah obviously i had no clue what it would come to entail but yeah i had i had no clue what i was getting into? Yeah. None of us said.

No one knew. Yeah. You can't. You don't. No, there's no way to prepare for that. Not at all. I mean, the world wasn't prepared for it. Yeah, they don't teach you that in nursing school.

Yeah, exactly. So something as you guys know that has been a huge part of my mental health journey, Taylor's mental health journey journeys as individuals, and as a couple has been therapy. Amen. And that is why I have. I'm so excited to share our next sponsor with you guys, which is Cerebral. Cerebral is here to help you achieve your mental wellness goals with professional therapy and medication management support 100% online. You'll experience the all new cerebral way, an innovative approach to mental wellness designed around you. You'll get a personalized treatment plan from a therapist, prescriber, or both in a safe and judgment-free space. I love that cerebral is 100% online because that means you have no excuse. You have to go. Yeah.

Like there's no, oh, I don't have time to go drive. It's too long of a drive. No, you can do it on your lunch break. You can do it before work, after work. And it's honestly just, it's convenient. Yeah. It's convenient and they have great therapists. Yeah.

And it'll just keep you accountable too. So we highly, highly encourage that you guys check out cerebral because therapy is just then wonders for us. and we know it'll do the same for you. To get started on your path towards better mental health, Cerebral is giving our listeners 15% off their first month of online therapy, medication, or both. Get started at Cerebral.com slash podcasts and use code the squeeze to make

your best year yet. That's C-E-R-E-B-R-A-L.com slash podcast and use code the squeeze offer is only valid on monthly plans other exclusions may apply see site for details get going on that therapy so all that to be said i feel like this is starting the next chapter of where like the shell started breaking for you in the world of mental health in that passion growing inside of you just one last point before i get to that is you work night shift some nights at work were really tough, some tougher than others. It's near impossible to not bring that home with you at the end of a shift, right?

And it was tough on both of us having to navigate the best way to go about that. I remember so many instances when you would come home from a shift and I could see on your face that you just, you weren't doing well. but you tried to put on a strong face because you you didn't want to bring that home. Like when we got to have dinner at the end of a night or, you know, breakfast in the morning before you go to sleep. You tried to put on the strong face, but there was a lot of times where, I mean, I know you very well. And I can just read you. One of the stories that comes to mine, and if you don't want to talk about it, I can just. move on and we can talk about Remy. But if you would be willing, would you be willing to share

about the woman with the yellow ribbon in her hair? This story is just like the first time it like hit me in the face that I was like, I have to be there for her. She's bringing all this stuff home and she's trying to be so strong and like not talk about this stuff at dinner. And I was like, if you need to talk about this stuff, that's what I'm here for. Like, you need to get this out. It's just going to fester up inside of you. And like this story was the one where I was like, I, I, as a boyfriend at the time, I have to like buckle up and be there as, you know, a support system to you who's doing the work of an angel. and you know, you need to be filled back up with love and support before you go to sleep, wake up, do your next shift, and have another story like this. Yeah.

But can you share a little bit about that moment? That was one of the first times I ever did compressions on a patient. And it's, you like learn about it. You do, you learn CPR on a dummy, do compressions. It's different. But what most people don't know is while you're doing compressions, you're literally feeling ribs crack. You're literally breaking ribs as you're trying to save this person.

So I had never felt that before. And that was a very odd feeling to me, as one can imagine. You were in the ER room, right? There's like the head. I was in ICU. An ICU. There's like the head guy in charge. And she's like, what's happening with her?

She's, I can't remember exactly, but she coded, which means she, heart stop. So we had to run in there. And he literally was like, Taylor, get over here. Yeah, you just, you just jump in. You just go. Someone's not doing it. You do it. But me and another nurse just jumped in and take turns.

You go until you get tired and then you switch. Yeah. And they switch, switch and switch. But I just remember as I was doing compressions looking up at her and she had like one of the nurses had tied like a cute little bow in her hair from like our gowns or something. Yeah. Had tied like a cute little bow in her hair and she was an older lady and her husband was there and knew that it was time. But that was rough. Her heart has stopped and you're on top of her crushing her.

ribs trying to bring her back to life. Mm-hmm. Her husband's standing right outside the room. Is he watching? Mm-hmm. My gosh. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Do we know what ended up happening? She did. She did. Mm-hmm. Was that the first death that you experienced in the hospital? I think so. At least that close.

That close and personal, yeah, for sure. Yeah. And somebody that you were trying to. save their life. Yeah. Yeah. So that's right. So yeah.

She ends up passing. You come home. I think that was a day shift still. Uh-huh. And I had like dinner made for you and over dinner. I was like, what's up? You actually had roses and a card and some bars for me. Oh.

Some of my favorite protein bars. Oh. Well, that's good. Yep. Yeah, well, that explains why it was such an emotional night for you, because it was the first time you ever, like, tried saving somebody's life, and it didn't work, and I just can't imagine how, you know, I don't know. I don't know how I would be able to deal with that, but you're a strong individual,

and you did. But I feel like that was the beginning of all of this, because then you work COVID for a year. Yeah. And then how do we get to today? Our first episode to squeeze, this is all you, baby. How did we get here from there? It's been a long journey.

No, but it really has been. Me working as a COVID nurse was the first time I ever experienced mental health. I guess probably to the degree that it was. Like I brush everything off. I don't speak about my emotions, which is a problem. Yeah, you're a... Yeah, I'm a pusher downer. Yeah.

But I've just always just been like, I'll brush it off or I'll move on or not think about it. But working COVID was so intense. I could not do that at all. Yeah. And I didn't realize I was struggling until you confronted me about it. Yeah. And you basically were like, hey, are you good? And I was like, yeah, I'm fine.

I'm just tired. Which is what she says to everything. Whenever I ask, are you okay, you good, it's, yeah, I'm good. But this time, I could just tell. Yeah. You were just saying that. Yeah. And you were like, no, but like, are you really okay?

Yeah. And I think we just stopped talking after that. I don't think the conversation went anywhere. We were in the car driving and I was just like, huh. Yeah. I've never thought about that before. Yeah. Am I?

I could tell your wheels started turning. Mm-hmm. And I was like, okay, I got my answer. I'm just going to, if you want to talk about it now, great. If you just want to think about it, we'll talk about it over dinner. Yeah. Well, I mean, we didn't even end up talking about it for a bit because I didn't even realize the extent of it for quite some time. Like months went by before I could even.

I mean, you can't, you can't process when you're in that state of just like go, go, go. I'm picking up extra shifts. I'm going in at 2 a.m. to take vitals because we're short-staffed. Like, you don't, you can't process what's happening during that time. So I definitely took some time for me to like realize what was happening. I mean, I think what really sat me on my butt was, I ended up getting COVID. Yeah.

Not from working. Yeah. But when was that? 20, like August of 2021. Yeah, July or August 2021. Yeah. Oh, I guess I got it in, no, I think I got it in June. Mm.

And then I was out of work for two months. Yeah. She got COVID really bad. We both got it at the same time. And for me, it was, you know, 10-day stint. Yeah. But for you, it just lingered and lingered. And it was rough.

Yeah, lingered for like about two, two and a half months. Yeah. I had to go on disability. I couldn't go to work. And I think that was just God being like, you've avoided this long enough. You need to just sit and not do anything and try to process what's happening. Yeah. Because I couldn't even like do the laundry.

Yeah. I was so out of breath. I almost passed out in like my nail salon to get my nails done. I was like, I'm not doing anything. I'm just sitting. Your body was drained. My, so weak. My oxygen would not go above, like, 91 for like months.

So, yeah, that was like a big, a big turning point for me. Just kind of figuring out what I wanted to do. I ended up leaving the hospital because I was like, I can't. I know I can't go back. I can't. It's too much. Yeah. And just kind of, like, sat at home for a little and debated on what I wanted to do next.

because I don't sit well. So I was like, what's my next project? What am I doing? Yeah. And that's how I started Lemons by Tay, which I was just like, I'm going to write a blog because I want to share my feelings with everything I've experienced because like 2020 was such a hard year. I know that I'm not the only person struggling with this. So I'm blessed to have the platform that I do.

So why not? post about it and share. And then from that came a nonprofit, the Lemon's Foundation, which I had no intention of doing. Yeah. From that, I came this podcast,

which I had no intention of doing. I know. You literally woke up one morning. You're like, I'm going to do a podcast. Yeah. And you're going to be on it too. I think I like,

yeah, ring you in. Oh, really? Yeah, I think I just like think of things when I sleep, because I was the same thing with the foundation too. I was like,

I had no intention of ever doing And I woke up a morning. I was like, I think I'm going to start a nonprofit. You were like, what? I was like, yeah. And then this, I was like, I think I want to do a podcast. You're like, really? I was like, uh-huh. Yeah. Doing something. Here we are. And selfishly after the hospital, you know, the COVID year and then you getting it, you being out of commission for two and a half months, seeing you go through that, go through just the emotional. side of things that I knew was, you know, I knew you were dealing with. Yeah. I selfishly didn't want to see you go back to the hospital. Yeah. If that was your choice and you were like, no, I'm going back. I would have been like, okay, great, let's do this.

Yeah. But yeah, selfishly seeing you like that, I hated it. So, I mean, I believe that it was just a sign that. that there's something bigger and greater out there for you where you can take what you know your knowledge, you know, you've worked your butt off, and you can translate that into just ways to impact so many more people.

And I'm just like, I said it all the time, but I'm just so proud of you. Yeah, it just feels surreal to be here right now. And yeah, I mean, I want to talk a little bit more about what you see this podcast. And, you know, we can tie in lemons by tag and the foundation. But, you know, what you see this podcast growing into about what do you, what's your intentions with it? What's your goals? My biggest goal in life is to help people as like, cliche as a,

sounds like clearly like I enjoy helping people I'm a freaking nurse like that's that's what you do you help you drop the freaking she's being serious I enjoy helping that's like what brings me joy yes so that's kind of the simple answer behind the podcast on the foundation behind lemons my te like that's I just want to help people through stuff because like obviously I wish that I had something when I was going through it. Yeah. But just sharing, like, what I've learned, too, because, like, we have, mental health has become a very trendy thing, but I just want to dive deeper into it as, like, what the next

steps are. What helped me get through this certain thing or that thing or this helped this person, not just, like, loom, mental health. Like, I want it. I want to, like. Yeah, you want to dig deeper. Yeah. I love intentional conversation.

Yes, you do. I do. Oh, I do. But yeah, that's that's kind of just my goal for this. But I'm just excited to like talk obviously with you, but also to like have our guests on and learn about them. Like I feel one of the biggest things that like I believe is like from every conversation you have, you take away something. You learn something. Yeah. Every podcast I've ever watched. I've learned something. Every there's so much to be learned and I love learning. That you do as well. Yeah, I do. But, but yeah, I'm just excited to learn about people and share that with other people because everyone's story is different and everyone can take something away from someone else's story. Yeah. If you can take a snippet away from each little thing you watch online per day.

Yeah. It's just, I mean, that is. And why not like learn something that's going to better your mental health? Yeah. You know. yours, the people around you, the people you care about, your family, friends. I mean, one of the things I'm most excited about with this is I feel like it's going to be an outlet for us entering this new chapter of life that we are. For those of you that don't know, we recently got married a few months ago.

We now share the same exact name. And yeah, it's a huge new chapter for us. And we're both, you know, going through our own things, but we're doing this together. And I feel like it's going to be a great way for us to just have intentional conversation. For sure. Maybe get to know each other even better than we do. Oh, my goodness. And then, yes, bonus, have some of our friends on, some people we've never met before, but we've wanted to.

Yeah. We have an incredible lineup of both of those. People that we know and love and are so excited to, like, dig deep. with and people that we don't know, but we know of and, you know, are fans of. Yeah. For sure. To just get to know them and provide a safe space for everyone to, you know, just be able to talk honestly about their mental health and, you know, what works for them, what they can use, what we can give them, what they can give us. Yeah. I'm just excited.

Yeah. I'm excited to talk to people. Yeah. Now we're going to go into a segment of the show that we're going to do each week, right? Yeah. With all of our guests called the Lemon 11. Can you tell everyone what this is and what this little game we're going to be playing is? Yeah.

I mean, it's just 11 questions that I feel each person is going to have a different answer. questions about their mental health. Some of them are fun. Some of them are like, you know, real questions. Deep questions. Yeah. It's it's 11 great questions that I think will just help trigger great conversation and just opening up our minds and hearts to the truth of what each of us are dealing with. And also it's one of our favorite numbers. It is one of our favorite numbers. We got married on 1111. We got engaged on 1111. And now we have the Lemon 11 11.

Here we go. Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the Lemon 11. Our guess. It's on a game show. I know, but that just sounded like fun. Okay, great. I'm here for it. I almost said Tay down.

Tay Lautner, number one. Yes. It's one of my favorite questions on here. What movie or song title best described? your mental health today. I'm going to go with a song. Okay. I did scroll through my Spotify and...

Milkshake. I knew it. Dowie. I did scroll through my Spotify to get some inspo. The song would be Bloom. Bloom? Yeah, by the paper kites. Great. Can you give us like 10, 15 seconds? Yeah. I feel like...

No, no, no, no. Oh, I'm not gonna freaking sing the song. Oh, come on. You have a beautiful voice. No. I would if you would buy me singing lessons. This chick, from the second I met her, literally, she's asked me for Christmas and birthday to buy her singing lessons. For four years, I thought she was kidding.

I thought it was a joke. And then one day she was like, no, I'm dead serious. I'm like, do you want me buy you singing lessons? It's the most random thing ever. Why not? I don't want to be like a pop star, but like. You just want to practice your. They will like Mariah Carey it, you know?

We do have some pretty fantastic singers who are, you know, friends of ours. You haven't wanted to ask them. Hey, maybe I got something in the works. Okay, so bloom. Yeah. All right. I feel like my mind is blooming. There's flowers that are growing.

There's healing that's been done. There's new life that's going on in there. Yeah. Yeah. That's my soul. The squeeze is blooming. Yeah, the squeeze is blooming. I love it.

These lemon trees are blooming with lemons. Oh, my goodness. Next episode, they're going to be to the ceiling. Getting their fake. Okay. Number two. How? Oh, no.

This one's a little less playful. Okay. How open are you with the people in your life when you're struggling? I was going to say, I think I'm pretty open, but I feel like you would disagree with that. Somewhat. I think I'm a little. As in once I realize that there's something going on, I'm open to talking about it. But if I don't like understand what's going on, then I don't really know how to like, like addressing it.

Yeah. You like to let it sink in, figure it out for yourself before you come forward. Yeah. And like talk about it. Yeah. I get that. Yeah. Yeah. I would say that's accurate.

I would say you definitely, like, I feel like I need to push you a little bit. Yeah. To talk about things. But you're right. It's usually when you're probably trying to figure it out for yourself. Because I feel like we both, I know I do for sure, have a hard time identifying why, you know, I'm feeling a certain way. If I feel sad or whatever, anxious, it's tough for me to put my finger on what in the last week year drove me to feel that.

Yeah. I like that answer. Okay. We're getting some more people. Number three. What is your favorite part of your morning or night routine? Oh, boy. This is going to be tough.

I think my favorite part is like sitting down in the morning, sitting down with my coffee in my little devotional journal having some quiet time. I love that time. You do. Yeah. I also love a good like nighttime face wash. That you do as well. Sometimes those can last literally 30 minutes.

No. 25. Yeah. You love your, you love, Tay wakes up early with the dogs because they wake us up early. They gotta go pee and they're hungry and she's an incredible mother. And yeah, you usually just stay up and have that like quiet time to yourself. And I feel like that's really important to you. Yeah, I love, I love quiet time.

Yeah. Number four. How has your career impacted your well-being? Well, just like rewind. And then you'll get there. I think we've covered that. Okay, then let me, so we know how your career as a nurse has impacted it. Why don't we do?

How is your career now, like this adjustment you've made to, you know, this platform that you use? How is that impacting your well-being? Fine. I definitely think my now career choice very much keeps me accountable because I'm sitting here preaching about mental health and you should do this and we need to make sure we're doing that and I can't just be sitting on my butt doing things that are not healthy for my brain or whatever it may be. And also like it just keeps me like learning new stuff. So I think it has positive impact. I love that. I would say so. I feel like it's definitely

help you grow. Yeah. In many ways. Yeah, for sure. I love the accountability aspect because that's, yeah, that's very true. I didn't think about that. Yeah. Okay, moving on. Number five. What is, man, I hate when I get asked this question. I don't know why. And I know next episode you're going to be asking me, so I better start thinking. I just never know how to answer it because I don't know how people perceive me. But let's see if you have an answer. What is the most misunderstood thing about you. It's a stumper for me always. Yeah.

So I'm like, I don't know. Like, I think maybe it would be the like human I am or the life that I slash we live. Mm-hmm. Because I am married to you. People like I posted that thing of you putting the clothes in the washer not that long ago. And people were like, you do your own laundry. Yeah. Like, I literally claim this entire. Like, I, I, I am the reason that the floor is vacuum. Like, I do everything. She's a queen. So, I think maybe that's maybe the most misunderstood that I'm just married to a celebrity and I get to sit back and relax and enjoy the social media and the trips.

It's just all glamorous. Yeah. That's not. Yeah. Well, like, definitely not. Well, we definitely, we, we have fun trips and we do a lot of great stuff. Yeah. Yeah. But we live a very normal life. Yes. I do my own dishes and I make my bed and our bed, not my bed, but. Yeah. But yeah, that goes back to, you know, what we all know, which is Instagram, social media.

It's very dangerous because, you know, we post our trips and we post our happy dogs and we post, you know, we do it too. Yeah. Who wants to post about the tough times? Yeah. I just, if I'm having a tough time, I'm just not posting. Yeah. Very true. It's very true.

So, yeah, it goes back to that. So, yeah, I think that's a really good answer. All right. Number six. What is the greatest advice you have ever received? Probably, I mean, you know, this, my dad is constantly preaching perspective and just like have perspective on this, this, this, this is how people can view this, whatever. Perspective.

perspective is he does love that word but that's that's probably be it to have perspective and I think that's carried like into my relationships with my friends with my family like especially with you like we're always putting each other like ourselves in the other shoes yes and I definitely think that is a large reason why we have such a healthy relationship yeah um why we don't fight like we obviously we have our little things here and there yeah but I've never walked out the door screaming at you. Yeah. So we,

the perspective has very much taught me to like look at the way other people view. Yeah. What I'm saying. And it might like, like the way I'm saying something could be coming across the complete opposite of how it was intended. Yeah. So I think that would be perspective. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. No, I love that. And honestly, I'd probably say the same. Like, you want to be. to avoid friction in fighting with somebody, whether it's a friend, a partner, whoever, put yourself in the other person's shoes. Yeah. And you don't have to agree with them. Yeah.

We do that all the time. You can disagree with me wholeheartedly. But if you're able to just understand where I'm coming from or me understand where you're coming from, there's love. Sure. will love, then you're going to be able to drop whatever it is. Yeah. And say, okay, as long as we all just want to feel heard.

Yeah. And we all just want to feel understood. For sure. So as long as I make you feel understood, even though I might disagree with you, for sure. It's going to, it's going to mitigate. Yeah. Correct?

It's going to mitigate everything. Sure. I'll go with it. Yeah. We'll kiss and make up. Great. Number seven. What does well?

wellness mean to you? It's a very broad question. It is. Yeah. I think wellness to me would be just how you're doing. Like just as simple as the question sounds. Like wellness is like how you're doing on any given Tuesday, you know, how is your brain doing? How's your heart doing? How's your soul doing. Like, and keeping all of those in check, I think would be what, like, wellness means to be. Yeah. I like the, on any given Tuesday. Yeah.

Because we all can be doing great when we're, you know, out to a fantastic dinner at a party or or on vacation or whatever. We all can be doing poorly when we're, you know, struggling at work. Even the opposite. Like, wellness and mental. health. Those things aren't just when you've hit rock bottom, when you've lost your job, when you've lost a family member or a friend, whatever hard time that you may be going through. And that's something that I've learned is like wellness is every day.

Yes. It's you as a human. Every day you're breathing, you're walking, your heart, your mind, your soul. It's moving. It's breathing. It's pumping. There's blood, you know, like that's, it's every day. how you're doing consistently. Yeah. How you're living. Yeah. You know, through the highs and lows.

Frick, I like that. Okay, number eight. What is your relationship with social media and do you think it affects your well-being? I definitely think it can. I don't read comments. Yeah. There's been times where you've come to being like, did you see the comments on that post from that outlet? Yeah.

And I'm like, no. No, you're very good about it. I just don't even. it's just not even worth my time. And I think in the beginning, I definitely did, but I was like, these are lies about me. Yeah. Like, these are things that aren't true. There's things that are hurtful to myself and my partner. And there's, I don't, I don't need to be reading it. So I don't even, I don't even look, honestly. You are much better at that than I am. I don't think I'm bad at it, But you're, yeah, you're better than I. And I definitely see how you, your relationship with it.

And I strive for that. Thanks. Yeah. Give you some pointers. Thanks. Okay. Moving on. Number nine, what is your favorite form of self-care?

How are you going to choose this? Oh, easy. What? Facials. Facials. I love facials. You do love facials. It's just my girl's great.

Shout out to Tara. She's... Tara. Tara. She's a bob. Olden aesthetics. Yeah. I don't...

I think that's just my... I mean, I love skincare. That's like even where, like, before I even worked, like, all my social media was self-care. Like, skincare. Like, that's... Yeah, you're very passionate. Yeah, I love skincare. My favorite.

So, definitely... Could we see a skincare line? What is it? Could we see a skincare line? Oh, like me released one? Yeah, girl. Oh, wow. Oh, no.

Maybe I'll wake up from a dream about that. And I'll wake up one day and be like, babe, I'm starting to skincare company. Chalk it up. Don't say it wasn't my idea. Does that mean you get 15%? Yeah. Just kidding.

Where did we even go with this question? Sorry. Your favorite form of self-care. You love Tara's facials and just relaxing. You know what I actually discovered about myself? What? Is sitting at home is hard for me to like find. mind time to rest and to like be still and not do anything.

Yeah, because you always feel like I can be doing this. I can be doing. Yes. I know what you're going to say. But when I'm getting a facial, when I go get a massage, I have nothing else to do but to relax. Yeah. You need to go somewhere and be put in an environment where you don't have any other choice but to relax and recharge.

Yeah. I just figured this out recently. I was like, oh, okay, great. Nope. So, yeah, I would definitely say facial because of that. and my love for skincare. Yeah. I think that's good.

I think sometimes you need to remove yourself from an environment that, you know, is good or bad. Like you just like, Taze a workaholic. Like if she has her laptop in the same house as her, she's going to feel like she could be doing something. Like, trust me, I want to be, you know, Netflix and chilling with her all the time. But she's, it's 9 p.m. and she's like, but I can be getting this done. So yeah, I think it's, I think that's good for all of us to realize that sometimes it's healthy to remove yourself from that. Yeah. And force yourself to find, you know, peace. Because you got to recharge to be able to get on the grind like you do. Yeah. Moving on. Number 10. Who has had the most positive impact on your mental health? Stop. You.

You have a lot of people. No, I think you. Okay. I definitely thank you. Well, I'm glad you think that. You have made me feel so safe and loved, and I feel like I'm able to share, like, my deepest feelings, that I know that you're not going to judge me through them,

but you are also the person that pointed out to me that I needed help when I did, and still do. But yeah, I would definitely easily say you. So thank you. Guess what? I would say you too. Okay, but you'll answer it next episode. Okay, you didn't hear that.

Okay, we have reached the end, the 11th question of the lemon 11. Okay. That's going to be tough. Say it three times. Lemon 11. Lemon 11. Lemon 11.

Pooh. All right. If you could go back to one moment in your life, what moment would that be and what would you say to yourself? I've actually thought a lot about this question because I feel like the question is like asked a lot. Like, would you go back and change this? Would you do that?

And I don't, I wouldn't change anything about. any part of my journey because I wouldn't be sitting here with you doing this right now. I would go back to when I was working in the hospital and either tell myself, like, I don't know if it would be like, hey, you got this or like smack myself in the face and be like, you need to like, you need to look at yourself, dude. Like, you need to stop pushing this down. I not to like

I mean I do make light of all the situations like all hardships I'm definitely the one that makes a joke about it or spins it into a positive but I would probably be like hey like you're not well like stop pretending like you are or stop pushing that down

because I definitely hit that or refuse to accept it for a long time so I think that would be what I would tell myself yeah I think that's very important for all of us. Myself, very much included, is it's so much easier to not admit it to not only your friends, your family, to yourself.

Yeah. So much easier to just ignore that. Yeah. Especially when you don't, like, have the tools or know how to or haven't, like, seen someone else, like, be honest about, you know. Yeah, if it's a new thing to you. Very much. If you don't come from a family or whatever that do openly talk about that, it can be that much more difficult. For sure, yeah.

So that being said, I commend you for doing that and paving the way not only for yourself, but for me to do that. You have had an unbelievable impact on me and making you. me feel like I can be honest about my mental health with you. Yeah. With myself and with, you know, our friends and family. And that is super important. And I'm going to say it one last time.

I'm so proud of you. Thank you for doing this. I'm excited to jump into this journey with you. I'm excited for the two of us to have more open, intentional conversation, get to know each other better and have some freaking killer guests on here and talk and get to know them more. Yeah. Thanks for believing in my wild, crazy ideas and dreams that I have in supporting me. I always will.

Thanks so much for squeezing us in. Be sure to follow, rate, and review the pod wherever you listen and subscribe to us on YouTube where we post the full videos of each episode. You can follow us on Instagram at The Squeeze at Taylautner and at Taylor Lautner. And of course, check out at Lemonsby Tay and Lemonsbytea.com for additional resources and conversations. Plus, email us at Lautner. The Squeeze Podcast at gmail.com.

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