The Therapy Edit - On come and walk with me for 10 minutes

Episode Date: December 25, 2023

If you're listening to this episode on the day it's published - Happy Christmas 2023! We hope you're having a great time. In this episode Anna invites you to take a moment away from the chaos or the feelings of overwhelm that might be creeping in or bursting out of you. Join Anna on a short ten minute walk, grab your headphones, grab your coat and enjoy a mini therapy session that will leave you better equipped to enjoy the rest of the day. We really hope it helps. x

Hello and welcome to the Therapy Edit podcast with me, Psychotherapist Anna Martha. I'll be bringing you weekly 10 minute episodes to encourage and support your emotional well-being. Hello, Merry Christmas. It's this episode is going on Christmas Day and I'm not sure how many people will listen to a Christmas Day episode of The Therapy Edit. But whether it's Christmas Day or not, I invite you to come for a little walk with me, just a 10 minute walk, five minutes and back or a quick lap round the block or whatever it may be. Grab the dog, grab the buggy, just step out into the fresh air. Sometimes it can just be so grounding amidst whatever's going on at home or where you're staying at the moment. over this festive season. I think I just want to, yeah, I just want to walk with you for a moment.

So put your boots on, put your shoes on. And you can pause and come back when you are ready to step out the door. So let's go. Let's walk together. First of all, I just want to acknowledge that Christmas is full on. It's full on. You might be having a quiet one this year. you might have just stepped out from a busy, messy household,

where there's a lot of noise and a lot of chaos. But what I want to do is I just want to say, it's a lot. It's a lot whether you're having a big Christmas or you're just having a quiet one. I know that there can just be so much expectation on how to feel at this time of year. And in truth, there's a lot more, isn't there? there's a lot more that is the reality behind the scenes and it might be that you're navigating grief at the moment. It might be that what's going on in the world is just really heavy on your heart and you're finding it hard to get into the spirit of things. It might be that there

are complex dynamics. Family stuff. I'm with you. I'm with you. Family stuff that's going on it might be that you're just exhausted from facilitating the fun for everyone else. And you know what is your Christmas too? It's your break too. It might be that Christmas doesn't look how you'd hoped it looked this year for whatever reason that may be. And I just want to take this moment as you walk, as you put one foot in front of the other to acknowledge all of those mixed and sometimes messy feeling. I want us both to really lift off your shoulders, the expectation that you should feel a certain way at this point, and just to give you some space to breathe and feel how you feel. It's really good to just honour that and not judge it, not think,

oh, I should be feeling like this or I should be feeling happier or I should be finding this less stressful. It should be finding that I should be over that family dynamic. actually you know what you just feel how you feel and there's productivity in just letting that feeling be for the next seven minutes that we are together now whatever is going on at home i just want you as you walk just to drop your shoulders a little bit i want you to slow your pace this season can feel so fast and even though you might have some time off work or the kids might be off you know preschool or nursery or school or whatever it may be, there's this expectation that it should somehow feel restful. Yeah, in truth, it's just

it's not always that way. So I'd love you just to drop your shoulders, especially if you're finding that they're right up by your ears. Just to drop your shoulders, just to wiggle your fingers, just to slow your pace. It doesn't matter if you don't cover as much ground. Just to slow your breathing. And my friend taught me this breathing exercise the other day. It's not, really an exercise to be honest. So as you're walking along, I just, I want you to imagine and think about all those little hairs in your nose, all those little hairs, and I want you to breathe low and slow. Imagine breathing in a way that doesn't actually move those hairs at all, obviously. We know this is impossible, but I absolutely loved it because it just helps me

slow my breathing down. Imagine inhaling and exhaling. And exhaling. And exhaling. in a way that doesn't even move those little nose hairs they don't even wiggle and I want you to just continue on like that as we walk and as we talk I'd love you to think about three things you're feeling right now what are some of those three some of those three feelings that are going on there might be many more you might find it hard to name them I'm just imagining I'm projecting myself ahead on to Christmas Day we're going to be five kids and six adults and lots of family dynamics and all of those things, a lot of excitement.

I imagine that three things I might feel, maybe a little bit of frustration, maybe some joy and gratitude at seeing the kids play together. They love being together. Maybe some need for space. Maybe some need for space. So I would just list those feelings. I wonder what yours are. Now, I don't need to judge them.

I want you to be really careful not to. just chase them up with but I should feel this or feelings of guilt you just feel how you feel now I'd love you to think about three needs that you have right now maybe you're actually meeting one of those needs and taking this walk taking this moment out maybe you need a bit of space maybe you need a bit of rest how might you get that not easy how would it feel just to say to a family member you know what can you just watch the kids I'm just going to go and have a bath I'm just going to have a little lie down, just going to go and read my book upstairs for 10 minutes just to decompress. Think about three of those needs right now. Maybe it's acknowledgement. Maybe you need to

rant to a friend about some tricky dynamics or a disappointment or frustration that perhaps you've had to internalize in the spirit of Christmas, but it's there bubbling under the surface. What about sending a message to that friend and just saying, gosh, this is tricky or this It's complicated. How are you getting on over there? Just to give voice to it. Just to give air to it to externalize it a little bit so you're not carrying it. And again with these needs, I don't want you to judge them. I don't want you to diminish them. I just want you to notice them and maybe one of them. You can think how might I act on that in a small way, in a small way. So as you walk, as you walk, we have validated some of those feelings and we have acknowledged some of those needs

and hopefully you are doing some of that lovely slow breathing, although I know it's hard, especially if it's cold and you're walking and your heart rate's picking up. It's hard to control that breath a little bit, but it's just that nervous system calming breath that says, hey, it's okay, it's okay. And sometimes that's what we need. Even if we're happy and we're having a great day,

sometimes we just need to ground ourselves a little bit. Now as you walk, I'd love you just to bring your, awareness to your surroundings. Just look. Just look around you. Where are you? Notice something that perhaps you haven't noticed before. Really look at something. Look at the skyline. What's the sky doing right now? What are those clouds doing? Is it grey? Is it raining? You have to pull back your hood a little bit to see up. Look at that massive sky. Is it showing off? Is it colorful? Is there a sunset less stars maybe maybe you're out walking and it's cold you can see your breath what's going on up there just remind yourself the bigger picture the bigger picture of your life of your life of the

you know i know sometimes it's a bit overwhelming to look up and think about the infinitenessness infiniteness of it all and how finite and limited our lives are but actually at the same time As you look up and you're probably thinking ahead to this next year and what that might hold, it's also that reminder of we just get this one life. What might you do? What intentions might you like to set for this year ahead that really honors you and who you are and what your dreams are? Just a little intention maybe as you reflect on how massive this universe is and how we are one in generations and generations. So this life is for you as well.

This Christmas is for you as well. This year is for you as well. How might you just, I don't know, just touch on that a little bit and reflect on that a little bit. And then, I mean, that's a massive thing to prompt, isn't it? So maybe that's one for another walk. Just tell out yourself to ponder what might it be like to claim a little bit more of life for yourself. as you head into a new year and then finally

I would love to draw your attention whether you're heading back home now back to whatever whatever that building holds whether it's your home someone else is whether it's who knows who knows where you may be but as you head back I would love you

just to pause just to see the nearest piece of greenery is there a bit of grass is there a plant is there a tree I mean if you're up for hugging a tree full advocate of that very grounding but in the meantime if not

just take a moment just to grab a blade of grass or just to hold a branch and just look at it and think of the intricacies of nature and just be so grounding just to draw attention down to the intricacies of nature

just to yeah remind ourselves of the bigger picture and the smaller picture and just think about some of those needs and how you might meet them. But I'm sending you love as you navigate Christmas. Take the pressure of yourself to feel or need in a certain way because you are where you are, who you are with the resources that you have. And yeah, just hope this has been a helpful moment. I will be doing it with you on Christmas Day because I will be needing it and just sending you love. Thank you so much for listening to today's episode of The Therapy Edit.

If you have enjoyed it, don't forget to subscribe and review for me. Also, if you need any resources at all, I have lots of videos and courses on everything from health anxiety to driving anxiety and people pleasing nail all on my website, anamatha.com. And also, don't forget my brand new book, Raising a Happier Mother is out now for you to enjoy and benefit from. It's all about how. to find balance, feel good and see your children flourish as a result. Speak to you soon.