The Three Questions with Andy Richter - 100th Episode Best-Of Special

Episode Date: June 29, 2021

Andy revisits some of his favorite moments on the podcast to celebrate the 100th episode. This week's episode features Maria Bamford, Will Arnett, Deon Cole, Zach Galifianakis, Nicole Byer, and Scott Thompson.

Do you ever think of going back to school and trying to learn a different skill? You know what? Sometimes I actually do think, I mean, I don't know, I can't imagine ever doing it, but I do think about becoming a therapist. Especially, I mean, it's been my secondary activity. Like just mental health and getting better and the notion of some kind of progress emotionally and psychologically. You know, it's of interest to me. I mean, it's what this fucking podcast. Right, right, right. This whole three questions thing is bullshit.

I just wanted to trick people into having a therapy session. I love being tricked. Welcome to it. Welcome to it. Welcome to it. The review. That's a breakthrough right there. That was the amazing and singular Maria Bamford when she was a guest on this podcast, The three questions, and you, lucky, lucky you, are listening to the 100th episode. Yay. Who would have thought that I would have this much

blab in me? Well, I do. I'm actually really pleased and proud of this podcast and what we've done and the people that we've gotten to be on here. And so we're just going to kind of take a stroll down memory lane with this episode and visit some of my favorite interviews and my favorite moments and some of the people that work on the show's favorite moments and just enjoy. This is sort of a little sampler of some of our best. Okay. Well, the second clip technically, because you already heard the first clip, is also with Maria Bamford, who is just an amazing performer, deeply, deeply hilarious, and also very brave. I think she's not afraid to put herself out there, warts and all, and really wear her heart on her sleeve. And as most of you know, of course,

all of you know, you have it probably tattooed on you somewhere. The three questions in this podcast are, where do you come from? Where are you going? And what have you learned? And she answered the second one, where she was going, different than most people do because usually people take it as a cue to like where are they going professionally or with their careers and she answered it um and said that where she's going is being decided by love. Is there something that you really like that you're itching to do that you haven't done? Do you have some sort of like, are you the kind of person that has a plan that you're like, I need to, I mean, you had a show, you know, that it was so fucking funny and unique. Love that show.

And I mean, do you want to do another thing like that? Or is there just? I'd like to do something if I was more of like an ongoing guest star. And if there was some improvised part of it, I'd love to do that. And in a character. Oh, my God. Can I please just be a character? Do you get a lot of chances to audition for character roles?

Actually, I don't audition anymore because I can't bear it. I did it for 10 years. I got one audition. I booked one thing, and the one thing I booked was because I was in a bad mood, and they thought that was hilarious. Wow. And then I was like, if that's the whole way I'm going to, you know, through these weird magical circumstances of me being an asshole for two days.

So I don't audition. So this is all, yeah, it's just vision board stuff at this point. Oh, yeah, yeah. My husband, my favorite new things that he does is that he reads directly off my vision board stuff that I, you know, like, babe, you know, these may seem like the little things, but in time we'll look back and realize they were the big things. Where did you get that? He's just reading straight off the board. Is he trolling you when he does that? No, no, no, no.

He's trying to say the right thing. Oh, I see. He's trying. You know, I know you're worried about. Oh, yeah, it's just darling. Bless his heart. I know you're worried about the Oh, that's just darling. Bless his heart. I know you're worried about the show, but you just get so good that they can't ignore you anymore.

Where'd you read that? Then he just shouts out, you know, images. Table of multicultural people eating spaghetti. House by a lake. House by a lake. House by a lake. Rickshaw. Oh, you know, I may never get to India, but what is the feeling I want to have in a rickshaw?

What's the feeling? The feeling of being cared for by someone who's struggling and in pain. That's right. Just someone that is taking me somewhere and it's uncomfortable for them. Can I get a piggyback ride? Yeah, no. But, yeah, we're both not very good at relationships. So we went all in. We went to a therapist three months in to try to learn how to handle conflict. I'm not very good at it.

Yeah, I just wasn't very good at it. Yeah, yeah. And especially intimate conflict where things can get really emotional. especially intimate conflict where things can get really emotional. Like he grew up in a situation where he has a bit, well, I don't know. I wouldn't even say anything about Charlotte. He gets irritated that I leave the keys to the front door in the front door. We live in Los Angeles.

There's a man who lives on our front lawn. Fair enough. All right. But I can't seem to remember to get the keys out of the front door. There's a sign. There's now a sign, a laminated sign that says, Maria, please remember the keys. Wow. That would make me fucking crazy. No, I know. I know. It would make me crazy.

I know. I know. I'm so sorry even to bring it up. That's all right. Okay. I didn't mean to trigger anything. I mean, I'm not married to you, so whatever. That's all right. Okay. I didn't mean to trigger anything. I mean, I'm not married to you, so, you know, whatever. Trigger, trigger. Yeah, so he felt bananas with that.

And then some things that he's done, like feeling I felt really triggered about as well. So, like, how do we help each other, work as a team? Like, okay, Maria, we did make the laminated signs. I'm getting better at it. I am getting better. I always thought, hey, why don't we just ask the guy who lives on our front lawn to remind me? Am I right? He's probably just gotten out of prison.

It's hard to get a job. Sure. If you're a felon. And how many felons are here tonight? Okay. So it's that kind of stuff that brings up intense emotion. And my first thing is just to, or has always been a relationship, is to just cut and run. Just go, oh, you're pissed at me.

Doesn't seem like this is going to work out. Right, right. It's been a good run. Fuck me, no fuck you. Yeah, no, exactly. Yeah. So, but I think it is, we don't know what we're doing. Yeah.

Not many people do. Yeah. It doesn't seem like it. And I think we just, I'm hoping for the best. And, yeah, we have a good couple therapist. And it is nice to find. I've just never had friends who have been married either. So I've had to find friends who know what it's like to be married because I don't think I know what it's like.

And I only have my parents who have been married for 50 years. My mom's just like, well, I just, you know, I mean, I just love your father. And then what I do is I take care of him. What? Boy, that sounds rewarding. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Sounds like you have a pet. Yeah, yeah, I take care of him.

I don't know. And I have tried to learn to be more caring. Like he got very sick when we were first dating. And so he remembers this. I brought over just a can of soup. I just brought over a can of soup and I put it on his bedside table. And he was like, what? It's like, it's a full can.

Enjoy it. You can snuggle it. Microwave's over there. You'll feel better if you get up. Let me just get you a Bic lighter. You can hold it under there. Yeah, I'm not super maternal. Yeah, yeah. Oh, whoops.

Sorry. Well, I mean, it seems to be, you know, working. Yes. No, it is. We have a good time. And he's a painter, and I do love his paintings. And he is, but he started doing stand-up a few years ago. Oh, my goodness.

Because he had a fear of public speaking. And I was like, oh, my God, do stand-up. Nobody's watching. Nobody cares. And he's good. He's very good. He's very funny. Oh, that's great.

So we've been having a good time. It has helped me remember how fun it is to go to open mics and stuff and have a good time. You know what I love about what just happened is that the second question thing about where are you going, usually people, and I mean, and I kind of think I end up talking about it because, you know, like, where are you going? Usually people, and I mean, and I kind of think I end up talking about it because, you know, this is supposed to sort of be about a, you know, kind of a more sort of personal conversation. But a lot of times it's about work things. And you're one of the first people that just talked about a relation.

Like, where are you going? Like, what's your aspirations and where's your future? You're one of the, I don't know that anybody else has just said, like, well, here's what's going on with my marriage. Yeah, yeah. So, you know. Oh, that's nice. So that's really a lovely thing, you know. Oh, yeah.

Well, and he's really helped me create more meaning, I think, in my work because it has been so lonely kind of by myself. And so, yeah, he was a part of the show. He did parts of the sitcom that I did on Netflix, Lady Dynamite. And he did, we made a comic book together. Oh, great. It's the story of our love as told by our two dogs. Yeah. So, yeah, there is that shared meaning.

Yeah. That I really, I've never had. I've just never had that. And so that's pretty, it does seem exciting. Yeah. I would say that I'm friendly with everyone that is in this 100th episode and are in these clips. But I'm not as friendly with any of them as I am with the next clip E, which is Will Arnett, who is one of my best friends and just a hilarious mensch of a guy.

And he's handsome. He's, you know, from a privileged background. But he's about as real as it gets. And here he's talking about maybe some of the reasons for that. Did you go to college at all or did you just head off to New York? I went briefly. I went for uh one semester uh to concordia university montreal yeah and and then um i remember cold enough and not cold enough in toronto for you you know i had to get to montreal where it's real cold oh my god

it's ridiculous there it's and then i went back, the next time I went back to Montreal was when we were shooting Blades of Glory and I was wearing a leotard and chasing Will, you know, Farrell outside and freezing. Anyway, I remember calling my dad and saying like, I went to college and I remember thinking at the time, I was with a lot of people I'd grown up with. And I was somewhere at Concordia and a lot of them were at McGill where both my sisters went. And I remember kind of looking around and having this moment. And everybody's just doing what they're doing in college. They're having a good time. They're studying, but they're having a really good time. And Montreal is a great party city.

It's a great town. It's unreal. And I was having a lot of fun, too much fun. I really wasn't doing much school. And I kind of looked around and I thought I did have this moment where I went, I'm, I'm just going through the motions. I'm wasting my time here. This is a waste of time. And maybe these people are not wasting their time. Not for me to say, but I can't do this. This is going to, where am I going to go if I just keep doing this? I don't see any. And I call my dad and I basically

said that. And, um, my dad's been awesome throughout my life. And a lot of times I didn't even realize until later. And I look back of how many, how great my dad has been. And he, of how great my dad has been. And I think that he could have had gone one of two ways. He could have thought, wow, you're such a fuck up and stick with it and know you got to stay in college and do, do, do. And he really heard me and he went, okay. Yeah.

And he said, come on home and get a job. And if you want to go to, and he goes, what do you want to do? And I said, I think I want to go to New York. I really think I want to do this acting thing. He said, well, then you better come home and make the money so that you can go.

Um, he wasn't, he was like, I'm not, I'll pay for you to go to college. I'm not going to pay for you to go do that. Um, yeah.

Uh, I'll help. That's really a credit to your dad too, because he's, he's not like, uh, you know, uh,

a mosaic artist. He's a business guy like he's a lawyer right a lawyer and a business guy and you know and i you know a lot i don't know maybe it's just my mind of business guy type dads would be like no you need to get into business because i mean even my mom is as supportive as she was you know she was in sales and she's like you should just when i was struggling you know like when i was making no money and trying to do this for a living and not podcasting who the fuck knew there was such a thing um what day you will podcast andy i don't know what it is, mom, but I want a podcast. It sounds dirty. It probably is. But she was like, you should just get into sales. She'd be so good at sales, which is basically like saying, like, you should just, like, pour cancer into your soul.

Like, that was what it sounded like to me. Like, get into sales. Like, oh, you mean die? Are you saying I should just die get fitted fitted for what fitted for the smith and wesson you're gonna put in your mouth but anyway so kudos to your dad that's really i love it when parents are like yeah whatever do it you know yeah and by the way and and by extension, of course, my mom too, they were very supportive in that way. I mean, it wasn't – obviously, there was friction in those times and when they were worried about their kid and what's he – you know, this is potentially the road to ruin for this kid.

We might be facilitating a major fuck up. Yeah, a major a major fuck up. A major, major fuck up. And, but yeah, he really heard me. And, you know, I look back, my dad, as you said, my dad is a fairly, he's not conservative, but he was a corporate lawyer for many, many years. And then he went into business for one of his clients and he ran that business. And he just did a lot of sort of those. And he lived, he lived and operated in a very serious world that had very, um, very set boundaries and, and, you know, you do that, you do X and Y and you'll get

to Z. And I think that, um, there were times though, where he really, uh, was able to think outside that and, and understand. Um, and it wasn't until years later, it was actually a couple of years ago where I actually was able to kind of say to both my parents, I really appreciate that. I know that my life is unorthodox to you. And I really appreciate that you've been able to roll with me on it. Yeah. It's meant, it's meant a lot to me.

And I'm very happy that I was able to actually say that to them while they're still alive. Yeah. Because I do plan on murdering them. I want to announce on the podcast I'm excited to say. There could only be one. There could only be one. No, but truly, you know, and my mom has always been very supportive

too i will say in in um not in any way like you're gonna go and do something and whatever she wasn't like that you're gonna be a star yeah i can't wait not at all like yeah you know there's a lot of like also like tough love on that too like you know even when things go great kind of like um you know she it's hard she's she can be stingy with a compliment let's put it that way right you know yeah well and she you know they know you too like that your people know you so like even when things are going good if there's something that's like not quite right they know that too you know yeah yeah um so what when you you're 20 you go to new well and also too kudos to your dad for saying like you better come home and make some fucking money you know because again that's like

yeah you know to just say like all right son i'll write you a check and you go to new york oh boy that's a dangerous no my dad you know thing. No, my dad came from very little. Both his parents were teachers in Manitoba. And I know, I know. Gross. Like the least honorable profession, teachers. My dad's dad, my grandfather, Emerson Arnett, he started the Manitoba Teacher Society.

So he was a teacher and he started a union, Andy. Oh my God. So that teachers could be treated fairly and all that kind of stuff. Terrible. Well, thank God his son went to the boardroom. I know. Well, you know what? What's interesting is my dad was always, my grandfather died when I was quite young, my dad's dad, which was a pity because I never got to really know him that well. And by all accounts, he was a really cool, great guy. And my dad felt a lot of guilt about sending me and his kids to private school.

Yeah, yeah. And I think that it kind of went against a lot of – you know, my dad had nothing. My dad met my mom the first time. nothing. My dad met my mom the first time. My mom grew up in Winnipeg and then they would go to the lakes, to Lake of the Woods. And all these people had these big cottages and my mom's family had a big cottage. And my mom met my dad at a party. My dad was a boat boy for a rich family. They used to have this position of boat boy. Wow. Yeah. Which was mostly a sex thing, I got to imagine.

No, fully a sex thing. Oh, okay, okay. Yeah. By then, it was just a full-time sex job. Right, right. No, he was like the guy who, because they had these elaborate, old, and beautiful places on these lakes with these boathouses, and they'd have these old mahogany boats. That constant upkeep take an upkeep and then he had to go and get groceries and do all that kind of stuff. And

it was like a summer job, you know? And so that's, and my mom, my dad was kind of like the poor kid who was working, working the job as the boat boy. And, and then he's this kid and he goes to, uh, university and, and, and school in Winnipeg. And then he gets a scholarship this kid and he goes to university and school in Winnipeg. And then he gets a scholarship to Harvard and he goes to Harvard based on his smarts. It's not like, you know, a lot of kids who go with – I'm trying to bring up Kushner because I'm trying to be current. I thought you were going for Conan. Oh, forget Conan. I know, I know.

I mean, that was just a redhead quota. Right, right, exactly. You know. Like, yeah. But, so anyway, so my dad was, he was a self-made guy in every sense. And I remember when I went to school with all, you know,

this boarding school, and there were a lot of really, some fancy people who went to that school, including Felipe, who was then the Prince and he's now the King of Spain. Wow. Yeah. And I knew him,

which is weird, right? Yeah. Yeah. Do you think he, do you, are you, have you kept in touch with the King of Spain?

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm the, I'm the official jester at the Spanish court. No, but I mean, are you, have you kept in touch with the King of Spain? Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm the, I'm the official jester at the Spanish court. No, but I mean, if you like, if you like bumped into him at something, would he, would you be like, Hey, I went to school with you? Yeah, yeah, yeah.

No, he'd remember. Yeah, yeah. For sure. I actually, a couple of years ago was going to Madrid for, again, for some press thing. I do a lot of press, Andy. I know. Well, you're in all kinds of stuff. I hate you. I know. I know you do of press, Andy. I know. You're in all kinds of stuff. I hate you.

I know. I know you do. Oh, I'm nothing but envy. Green with envy. I got from a guy who was his roommate a way to get in touch with him, and then I ended up going, and I couldn't do it.

Yeah, yeah. i was too busy for the king um sorry king sorry sorry i got a photo shoot um and uh for lego batman i'm lego batman king sorry wait it's just your voice why would they they photograph you? Which, by the way, Ricky Gervais always says to me, like, we joke around. He's like, I don't know why you need to be in shape as a voiceover artist. I'm like, fuck you. Anyway, you know, so anyway, so I went to school with a lot of these fancy types. And I remember one time there was some kids were going to go on this trip. And my dad, I always had a job like on Christmas break. And when I'd come home and in the summer,

when a lot, a lot of these kids did not, cause they were super wealthy. And my dad would be like, I remember the kids were going on a trip and I said, can I go? And he said, no. And I said, well, so-and-so and so-and-so are going, he goes, yeah, well, they're going to be losers. And, uh, you're not. And he basically was yeah well they're going to be losers and uh you're not and he basically was saying like you got to come home and fucking realize you got to earn it yeah and these kids can go and have a free ride but that's not going to lead to good things and i at the time remember being like so mad about it yeah and and all these years later, I realized what an unbelievable gift my dad gave me with that. Yeah.

He really did. It was such a gift. Can't you tell my love's a-growing? This next clip is from a dear friend of mine and a former co-worker, Dion Cole, who is a hilarious stand-up. And he came from stand-up, and I think his first professional writing job was on The Conan Show. He was so funny on our show that we offered him a job and had him come in and i asked him about that transition of being solo stand-up performer then coming into a collaborative writing space did you catch any shit for working on our show yeah out in the world i would imagine a lot of shit yeah a lot i got a lot like i wouldn't even get booked on certain shows because they deemed me a white comic.

I was called Token. I was called all kind of shit, man. Like, a lot of, like I said, a lot of people wouldn't even book me or whatever, like, on shows and shit like that. I had to, like, really grow my own lane and build my own following and start my own fucking shit. Was this after our tour no this was this was during during when i first came to the night show yeah yeah just stop it was like this first of all no black no no no no black people were very proud of me yeah when i was on the tonight show they was like yo and they made all comedians be like, man, I want to get into Late Night.

Inspired a whole lot of people, definitely. But then when it came to comedy shows, if they felt like I wasn't a great fit for the lineup that was going on, so I would never be

booked on the lineup. If it was this comedian this comedian this comedian it wouldn't be me and then if they did book me a lot of them be like oh it'd be good to get dion because it'd be a different kind of flavor on the show like that that's how they will book me yeah get dion because he'll bring a different kind of twist to the show yeah and then my audience started changing too my audience went from black to, like, white. Like, I was, like, I was showing up at shows, and my audience was totally. Just white.

Wow. Yeah, it'd be just white. But I'd be doing these, like, black jokes or these jokes that I write for black people. And white people would be like, it'd be cool, but it'd be, like, odd. It's weird, yeah. Yeah, so. It's like you said, like like you don't know me enough to laugh at that whereas a black crowd knows you you know because they have a shared experience yeah and so i wasn't sitting asses in seats in black theaters and black shows so a lot of

promoters wouldn't wouldn't book me neither because a lot of black people weren't watching conan like that yeah yeah so i wasn't putting asses in seats and and and like like a lot of black people weren't watching Conan like that. Yeah, yeah. So I wasn't putting asses in seats. Like a lot of white shows, you'll perform, but you wouldn't make money. Black shows, you make money, but you got to put asses in seats. So it was a long time that I was missing from that scene, but I was becoming funnier and funnier. So when I did start kind of like coming back around the scene or whatever. And writing and writing and writing. Writing and writing and writing. And that people start going, oh, oh, damn.

Like, oh, we didn't know he was that funny. Oh, man, we didn't know this and we didn't know that. And so it just started building up where like my black audience started showing up and showing up. But then when I hit blackish, it was like yo like it was like crazy boom because I still had you all's audience and then I had this Black-ish

audience and now my crowd was like that's when my audience started being like the perfect fucking blend you know and then a lot of white people watched Black-ish that's what I was going to say Black-ish is a very mixed show. I mean, it's got it.

Actually, we have more white viewers than black now. Oh, wow. Absolutely. Yeah, absolutely. That's really cool. Yes, it is. That's really great. It really is. And it's a testament to the quality of the writing in that show and the quality of the performing in that show.

Absolutely. Because it does, it's like, you know know it's about a family yeah and even though black is in the name it's secondary to the fact that like we know all these people you know yeah absolutely yeah how did that come about i um just an audition i was no i was leaving i was i was leaving here after i had my show black box right you had a show on our on tbs yeah for a little bit yeah the show called black box at the black box i was coming back over here just a little bit to do bits but i didn't want to come back and write write write like that i was just thinking like at the Black Box and I had this whole shit with TBS, man. I was at the time, the people that were in the office at TBS at the time, they were like

on some baseball shit, like white America. Like my show just wasn't fitting the network, but it was, but it was praised by everybody else. Yeah. Yeah. It was funny. It was a funny show. Yeah.

It was a funny show, man. It was praised by everybody else. Yeah, yeah. It was funny. It was a funny show. It was a funny show, man. So I just knew that I had a formula and I wanted to go somewhere else and do it or whatever. As I was having meetings to see if I could take Black Box to another network or something, then they came to me and was like, hey, Steve Carell's doing a show on TBS called Angie Tribeca.

You should go audition for it. And I was like, okay. And I went and auditioned for it. And the day before I was auditioning, they were like, hey, they want to change your character that you auditioned for. Because Steve Carell don't want you to be another angry. Because I was auditioning for a lieutenant. They said, we don't want you being another black screaming lieutenant in a fucking show or whatever.

So we're just going to have you come in and we're going to see what happens. And I came in and me and Steve Carell actually ad-libbed just anything. Yeah, yeah. He would just make up shit and I would just ride with him and just go with him and we would go back and forth. And he was like, okay, we'll get back at you. They ended up writing a character for me. So he ended up seeing Full House the night before and saw DJ Tanner's name and came back and was like, you're going to be DJ Tanner. And I was like, oh, okay. And he was like, yeah, we're just going to write a character for you. We'll write it into the script. So a lot of the first episodes, you'll see me just go, hey, Angie, they need you in the office.

And that would be it. Because they hadn't figured it out yet. They hadn't figured it out yet. So I'd just come in. Hey, you guys, you need some coffee? I'm a placeholder. I'm a placeholder. Something's going to happen with me soon.

TBD. TBD, just wait. So yeah, so that's how it was. And so when we found out that he was writing me in, I was like, man, this is great. But the show was taking so long for us to film. Like, we was just like, OK, all right, ready, all right. We went to like two upfronts. Like, when are we going to be shooting?

Oh, yeah, they do that shit. They do that shit do that shit so i was like i've been on up fronts with like shows where they're like yeah we everything we have 10 episode shot and it won't be uh on the air for another 13 months yeah which is like what the fuck yeah so i was like man i was just thinking well, let me just keep taking these meetings and stuff. And so this agent by the name of Tamara, Tamara was like, yo, these people are looking for writers. If you feel like writing and they hear that you just finished writing for Conan, if you can come over and just write for them, like, see if you want to write for them or whatever. And I said, oh, OK, what's the show? And they was like, she was like, I forgot the name of it.

I don't know it. And they was like, well, can you come meet with the executive producer, the creator of it? And so I met with Kenya Barris, and he was like, yeah, it's a show called Black-ish, and it's about this family and da-da-da, and I was like, oh, okay. And they was like, yeah, so we're looking for some characters that you could probably write for or whatever to help out. So I was like, all, okay. And they was like, yeah, so we're looking for some characters that you could probably be right for or whatever to help out.

So I was like, all right, fine, cool. So they started telling me about this character named Charlie that Charlie Murphy was supposed to play. Eddie Murphy's brother who passed away, rest in peace. And so he was supposed to play this character. And at the last minute, he was like, he wasn't going to do it. And so Kenya was like, man, you think you can play the character? And I was like he wasn't gonna do it and so kenya was like man you think you can play the character and i was like uh i guess but i knew i had my tbs show i was waiting on that to come so i was like black box still hadn't happened yet no black box oh oh oh oh oh oh yeah i remember that

how you kind of were like yeah in between the two yeah so So I was like, yeah, I'll do a guest spot on it and did it. And they was like, can you do it again? And I said, yeah, and went to another episode, did it again. And they was like, yo, okay, just one more time. And I did another episode, played the character again, and they was like, okay, we got a problem. It was like, we got to have this character on the show. They went to TBS.

TBS was like, fuck no, we're about to start shooting. And they was like, well, can we use him until you shoot? And they was like, okay. So I did probably like eight episodes of Black-ish, and then I had to stop and do Andrew Tribeca. The next season, they was like, we got to have him. So then they negotiated with TBS, TBS, like, fuck that, no, no, no. And then they was like, okay, you can use him on days that we got to have him. So then they negotiated with TVSTS, like, fuck that. No, no, no. And then they was like, okay, you can use him on days that we don't need him.

So then they started changing their schedule, having me working on these days in order to come over and do Black-ish. That's so fucking stressful. It was stressful as shit. Yeah. But then we got through it, and I ended up doing like 12 episodes of Black-ish. Yeah. Because they was doing 24 episodes. Right, right. So right right 12 of them

and still did all the angie tribeca season three they was like yo what do you want to do and i was like okay i'd rather do blackish and they was like didn't want to let me out my contract so they took me from from from a regular to like uh co-starring on Angie Tribeca so I can do more Black-ish. And I did that. And then the fourth season, they was like, I'll do two, three episodes of Angie Tribeca, all of Black-ish, and now it's Grown-ish.

So Grown-ish spent off. And so they was like, we need you to jump off Grown-ish. So he was like, we're going to use you as your character to come over on this new show called grownish with a spinoff that we can we can get viewers and shit like yeah yeah use you on both shows and i said okay so i was doing andy trabeca blackish grownish and still was coming over here doing bits yeah yeah conan and so and then- And doing dates too. And I was like a date.

Doing Lunatic. And I had this other game show called Face Value on BET that I was hosting. But I filmed that all in like two weeks. Yeah, yeah. Game shows are nice that way.

Yeah, you can knock them out. Yeah, yeah. I filmed it all in two weeks. So I was going crazy that fourth season. Like it was just like nuts. Jesus. But never auditioned.

Everything was just always like, you know, we vibe with you. We trust you. Yo, we want to rock with you and shit. Same thing with Conan. Same thing with Steve Carell. Same thing with Kenya. Yeah.

It was always just, man, we fuck with you. Yeah, yeah. Let's just make something happen. Yeah, yeah. Let's just make something happen. Yeah, yeah. Anything I've auditioned for, never really got. Yeah. It was just always moments like that that made my career take off.

That'll make you feel real good. I hope it does. It does, man. It does. It keeps me hopeful. It keeps me feeling like I believe in myself. Yeah. I don't have to question myself.

It's a bullshit business. Yeah. But there is some occasionally realness gets valued and gets rewarded. It does. And I think in your case, you're a very good case for that. Yeah. good case for that. There are few people on this planet that I love more than Zach Galifianakis. And so I was very excited to talk to him on Zoom from his mysterious rural location where he now resides with his family. And we talked about one of my favorite

topics, which a lot of people think is comedy kryptonite, but I think there's a lot of funny stuff to be mined from talking about fatherhood. And Zach was pretty funny when he talked about what it's like at his house. Has fatherhood changed you very much? Oh my God, 100%. In what ways do you think? Well, I get up at five every morning. That never used to happen. To me, if you're lucky enough to have kids, one of the benefits is you get to relive your own childhood in a way because you get to see the eyes of your children, experience the world. And that to me is just, yeah, there's nothing better. And I find men don't talk about it much. And I, if there are any young men out

there, you've been marketed to young men that you're supposed to act like you guys do in beer commercials, but fatherhood and being that in that world to me is the greatest thing of my life. It just is. I, my, my dad was a really good dad. I think. And I, I learned from him, not that I'm a good necessarily that, but it changed. It just did it. I cry a lot more. I'm more emotional. Yeah. Because the lack of sleep might, might, I'll tell you, my, my youngest son, I was talking to him the other night,

and I don't think he really knows what I do for a living. But anyway, we're in bed and we're cuddling. He's four. And he goes, hey, Dad. He's a weird accent. He goes, hey, Dad, have you ever met Hitler in a movie? I'm like, have I ever met Hitler in a movie? Have I ever met Hitler in a movie? No.

He goes, he's a pretty weird guy, right? So those kind of conversations to me are, I mean, I just love it. I just do. I'm amazed how funny kids can be. And I mean, look, as a comic, I also learn a lot from kids. I think my humor was probably, because I see one of my kids do it now. He'll say something very straight, but he knows he's getting a real, he knows he's getting a reaction because he's saying it straight.

And that to me is really interesting to watch. I don't know. I just, I just always like, I'm a family man. I'm a family man. Yeah. I, I, yeah, I'm the same way. I always kind of felt like, Yeah, I'm the same way. I always kind of felt like, especially in the work that we do, the silliness of it, the silliness of it becomes, and it's a really silly business that, yeah, there's, you know, lots of money involved, but ultimately it's pretty silly. And, you know, if like an alien force were to land and decide who were essential and non-essential personnel, I think we would be vaporized, you know, like they're going to look people for people who can build bridges and, you know, I don't know, grow food underwater or something. Not fucking wisecrackers. But I always I always loved that my kids like when my kids showed up up, which by the way, we didn't have them. They just show up just like a cat that walked in the back door one day and you put a bowl of food down and then it's like, oh, I got a son, I guess.

It's more convenient that way. Oh, it's great. They make things, they really make what's important, important. They really show you like, oh, that, you know, all that, this, like the amount of time that you've had to spend working in show business, worrying about something that's just stupid. And then, and you, but when you don't have anything to balance it against, you think this, no, this is important because look, there's all these people that care. And then you have a kid and it's like, oh, no, no, that doesn't matter at all. You just kind of act like it matters and then go home.

I always, on sets at 4 in the morning after we've done 15 hours of improv, I'm like, does anybody want to go home to their families? You know what I mean? Show business also has a lot of young people that are working, younger people. So family life and show business is tough because of the hours. Yeah. Yeah. But you learn a lot as a comic from paying attention to younger people.

So, yeah, the kids are very, selfishly, I get to watch them and be inspired by them for humor in a weird way. Yeah. If you could go back and talk to Zach when he showed up with his cousin in New York City and tell him something that you feel would be useful to him. What do you think it would be?

Don't get headshots. Don't get headshots. That's it? Well, back then there was such an onus on getting your headshot like that was you're going to be your your calling card. Well, not for somebody like me. And that wasn't my calling card. But no, in serious, if I've never thought about that, what I would say to a younger me. God, I don't know. That's a good question. Oh, probably you're never going to get taller. you're never going to get taller. Maybe I'll say this, that younger version of me, I would say, hey, you may not feel that this will ever happen, but you're getting ready.

You're going to gain about 55 pounds in two years. So watch out. Yeah. What would you say? To Zach or to me? No, to you. To Zach, I would say grow that beard as quickly as you can. I've always had without it. You're nothing for me. Well, I was asked that question. I did a live version of this podcast with Rachel Dratch in San Francisco at the Sketch Fest. And somebody in the audience asked, like like what advice would you give yourself and i thought about it and i was like honestly learn to like cardio just that would be the main thing i would tell myself like learn to like cardio i don't care because it's when you're 50 and you get on the fucking machine and you're still going, I hate this, I hate this, I hate this. It's not good. It's not good.

Do you get on a machine and do that? I do. I do elliptical. Jeez. Not as much as I should. What's your workout regimen now up there in the wood? You just go toss logs around. I garden in the winter. I've been, I've been chopping a lot of wood. Um, yeah. Beating up my children. Um, yeah. My, my, my kid, my four-year-old keeps telling

me that he can't, this is almost a quote. I can't wait till I'm bigger so I can pummel you in the front yard. He's very physical. Nothing like raising bullies. Can't you tell my loves are growing nicole byer uh was on the show a while ago and she is just such a joy and a light and just a hilarious hilarious woman and uh well everyone knows that now um but i was talking to her about what it was like to be a funny person. You know, I have a lot of comedians on the show and we all kind of share a moment in which we decide. I mean, some of it's more gradual, but a lot of people, it just lands on them.

The idea that I am going to make people laugh for a living. And here's what she had to say. I mean, were you always a funny kid? Were you a funny family? My mother was very funny. And then now that I'm older, I understand that my dad was funny. Yeah. Because sometimes you're like, quiet people aren't fucking funny.

Right, right. My dad was kind of quiet, but like, he was like sneaky funny. Yeah. My sister, I think she's funny. But one day I was like, Catherine, describe yourself. And she went, oh, well, I'm very short and boring. And I was like, this was your moment. You could have said anything.

And you blew it. But I think she's funny. I was always very loud, and my mother would be like, you got to learn a time and place to be loud. And I'd be like, but now is the time. Now is the place. So I never quite learned that. Turns out I had ADD, and that's why I was just like loud and I'd be like but now is the time now is the place so I never quite learned that turns out I have ADD and that's why I was just like loud and buzzing around and like couldn't focus on things but in high school my mom was like you're very loud so like why don't you go be loud on a

stage like act a little bit and I said okay and that's when I was like oh this is what I want to do forever like uh that first laugh is addictive or addicting or whatever. You're just like, oh, I need this to happen over and over and over and over again. Kind of like how I feel like drug addicts feel. Because you're just like, that feeling feels so good. So that's when I decided that I wanted a career making people teehee and giggle. Now, I find from my time in doing this, a lot of the people that really get off on that laugh are fulfilling something that's missing.

Do you feel like there was something? I mean, you know, this is a pretty prying question, but you know what I mean? Like, were you not getting enough attention? Did they ignore you at home? I got so much attention that it was sick. Yeah, yeah. Like my mother. That's different than most people I know that really need it didn't.

Yeah. You know what I mean? And they're making up for something they weren't getting. I think maybe when I can get someone to laugh, that means they understand me. Yeah. They understand what I've said. And it's funny. I wasn't really understood growing up

Like I would make choices And my mother would be like I don't understand why you did that Blah blah blah blah Like the last fight we got into Was over the PSATs And I didn't sign up for them And she was like

Why wouldn't you sign up for them? And I was like I don't need SATs Mama, I'm going to be an actress And she was like I want you to go to college And I was like I don't want to

So we just fought about that And she was like I don't understand go to college and I was like I don't want to so like we just like fought about that and she was like I don't understand I gave you a check why wouldn't you just send it in and I was like oh because

I'm not I don't need academics I'm funny so yeah I would just truly make choices and she just like didn't get it

that's flawless logic to tell a mother when you're 16 or 15 years old because I'm funny mom oh okay I'm funny I don't need school yeah That's flawless logic to tell a mother when you're 16 or 15 years old. Because I'm funny, Mom. Oh, okay. I'm funny.

I don't need school. Yeah. That'll pay the rent. Yeah. Yeah, I got a lot of attention. Yeah. Had she gone to college? Yeah. She, like, worked and put herself through college.

And that's where she met my dad at the University of Chicago. Oh, wow. Smarty Pantses. Yeah. I think it was the University of Chicago. Well, it better be because that sounds classy. It does. Because that place is like nerd central.

Oh, is it? You've got to be really super smart to go there. Oh, well, my dad was very smart. Yeah, yeah. What did he do at AT&T? He like wrote programs on how you're billed on your phone. Oh, wow. What a dick. Yeah, right? How rude. I want're billed on your phone. Oh, wow. What a dick.

Yeah, right? How rude. I want to use my phone for free, did he? Yeah, he worked at AT&T and Bell Labs and shit like that. Wow. So, I mean, but you said your mom was funny, though. I mean, yeah. Did she have a job or was she?

She did have a job. So she, no, growing up she did not. Oh, she worked at A&S, which was a retail store that closed. And then she worked at our school because my mom really liked being a mom and really liked being around me and my sister. So she was like a lunch lady and she did something else at the school. And then she started working at the church. She was very religious. She was the church treasurer.

I think she missed out on being a teacher. She liked kids and she liked teaching. I think she should have been a teacher, but, she was very religious. She was the church treasurer. I think she missed out on being a teacher. She liked kids and she liked teaching. I think she should have been a teacher, but, you know, whatever. She didn't do that. And then she worked at the church until she died. Yeah. How did she pass, if I may ask? You can ask.

Of a pulmonary embolism. So she had a blood clot in her leg that traveled to her heart and stopped her heart. Oh, that's terrible. And then my dad died of a heart attack. So I'm going to die of heart heart. Oh, that's terrible. And then my dad died of a heart attack. So I'm going to die of heart disease. Well, you can do things, you know. Well, my dad was fit.

He was a very thin, fit person and still died of heart disease. My mom was fat and she still died of heart disease. I didn't mean that. I mean like medication. Oh, well, he was on medication. Oh, he was too? It's inevitable. I'm going to die. My lovely, cute little heart's going to explode.

Yeah. I always remember there was a guy when I was a kid who was, like, he was on commercials for healthy foods and stuff, and he wrote a book about, like, the runner's Bible or something. I think his name was Jim Shorter. And so he's like a marathon running, you know, like, proselytizer about the healthiness of running. Motherfucker dies of a heart attack. Huge, gigantic heart attack.

And I mean it like a fairly young age. And I remember even at that age being like, wow, that sucks. Death will get you. No kidding. It'll come for you whenever it wants. Yeah. And I mean, and I have friends, people that I know that I've worked with one just a year or so ago, guy about my age, just died. Yeah.

Nobody, and he was healthy. I mean, we had worked together years ago, and then the way that I knew him was from seeing him at the fucking gym. That's how we maintained a relationship over the years, and then just died. It's kind of wild. You hit a certain age and then people will just continue to die. Yeah, yeah. And I'm not afraid of death. I've already planned my funeral.

Have you really? Uh-huh. What is it? Well, okay. It's in my will, but technically you're not allowed to ask people to do things in a will. But that's okay. I have it. My best friend, I told her where it is, and she's got to carry it out.

So at my funeral, I want to be wearing something real slutty. I also want googly eyes over my eyes. I love that there's a legal document that says googly eyes. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then I gave her the names of three dudes that I want to come talk about my pussy, just like in a nice, fresh, fun way. Neil deGrasse Tyson. He is one.

Dr. Phil. Dr. Phil and Jerry Springer. And then I have like a thing I want each of my dear friends to do with my ashes, which like pertains to our relationship. Just like a fun, stupid, silly thing to do. Yeah, but save that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Don't, don't, don't, no spoilers here. No, no, no, no to do. Yeah, but save that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. No spoilers here. No, no, no, no. I haven't told any of them. And then my best friend, I was like,

just so you know, I wrote my true feelings about how much I love you. And she was like, oh, well, tell me now. And I was like, no, you have to wait till I die. You can't know how I really feel about you yet. You gotta be sad. And then I asked her to go through all of the voicemails I've left her and she has to compile the best of them and then play them for everybody. And then I want everyone to do like a tight five minutes about me. Nice. That's, you know, the fact that she, that you're not going to tell her what you've,

what you think about her really puts the pressure on her to maintain that. Like she can't fuck up from now until. No, she really can't. Wow. Because I can still edit the document. Right, exactly. Yeah, yeah. Or it'll just be, like, completely wrong. And everyone will be like, what?

That's wrong. Oh, and I also asked her to, um, I was like, hopefully Deadline will announce my death. Yes, yes. Because I love a good Deadline article about myself. And I was like, I want you to post my Deadline article as my final Deadline article. And then I gave her the caption she needs to post with it.

I'm insane. No, no. It just, no. You, uh, I mean, and I mean this in the best possible way. You are an expression of an incredible amount of self-love. Thank you. I mean, I think so. I do love myself

a lot. Why not? It's a waste of time. I get really confused when people don't like themselves because there's so many things you can do to change who you are to be the person you want to be. Like on my Instagram, I'll get a lot of people being like, I just wish I was as confident as you. And I was like, oh, that's really easy. Just like wake up in the morning, look in the mirror and go, I like what I see. Yeah. And you say it every day until you, look in the mirror and go, I like what I see. Yeah. And you say it every day until you don't have to say it because you actually like what you see.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I think it's time we done some walking. I think it's time we done some talking. Well, there's a great big moon. I was really, really, really happy that Scott Thompson agreed to come on this show because A, he's hilarious. B, I love him. And C, he needs to talk. He needs the talk. He needs the therapy. And in this clip, he really brought it. He really, you know, he spilled his guts, which is what I like about this show and what I kind of wanted this show to be, you know, in a beneficial way, in a good faith kind of way.

And because the hope is, is that if you talk about what's happened to you, it helps you understand who you are now. And that's sort of what scott's talking about here so give it a listen do you have an idea like when you like when you first became aware of gayness as a as a thing you know like in terms of like oh yeah this is the way some people live yes yeah and it Yeah. And it terrified me. I mean, it just terrified me. And in those days, nobody was open, but there were a few beautiful heroes. And they were like Gore Vidal, James Baldwin, Truman Capote.

Those are the only, Tennessee Williams. Yeah. And they were almost exclusively writers. Yeah. And they are almost exclusively writers. Yeah. And they were my heroes. You know, except for, but Truman Capote skeeved me out. I was so horrified by him, even though I knew he was a brilliant man. But his effeminacy, it made me so terrified.

Yeah. Because I thought, oh my God, the moment I declare what I am, I will be such a queen. And that was the worst. Well, the worst thing you could be was a homosexual, but an effeminate homosexual was the bottom of the barrel. And so every time I'd see him, I would just be sick. And I loved Paul Lynn. It was my only impersonation that I could do. Yeah. But he was not, or Charles Nelson Reilly. Yeah. And those are the ones where I went, those are gay men. Right.

But they scared me because they were, we could say, faggy in the day. Yeah, yeah. I mean, I said it. Effeminate. Yeah. And that terrified me. But that's when I started to realize,

I think it was probably through James Baldwin and Tennessee Williams, number one. Like, what age is what age is this this would have been 14 yeah yeah and i had a teacher he was an amazing teacher and um everyone loved this man and i i realized he was most likely homosexual yeah i had a i had a i had a very formative teacher like that, too. Years later, thinking back, I was like, oh, yeah. And he would do things like, and this is his beautiful outreach to kids like me in that time. He taught us English, and I was in enriched English. So we were a smaller class.

And there was a little library he had at the back. And there would be about maybe 20 books. And for someone like me, he would say, why don't you go take a look at this shelf? Yeah, yeah. And it was never labeled, and it would be James Baldwin, Tennessee Williams, Gore Vidal, Truman Capote, those books. And it was Giovanni's Room by James Baldwin.

That really opened me up. It's still my favorite novel of all time. Oh, wow. It's a beautiful, beautiful book. I've never read it. I will, yeah. It's the best. So it was through those people that I started.

And then I started to explore the whole world of it. And I mean, Gay Liberation was just in its infancy. What year is this about? This would have been like in the early, I guess, early 70s. And so I would read about homosexuals. There was once a cover of Life magazine, and it was like, the homosexual. And it was just darkness and a face in the dark,

a shadowy figure in the darkness. And then when I was like, yeah, that's the way it was back then. But I knew. I knew. And all I wanted to do was get out so that I could be myself. And I really thought, well, it's going to be a rough, rough road. And that was before AIDS happened. And then I went, oh, they just tore up the rough road.

Yeah. They didn't even give us a road. Or there's snipers in the trees now. So that was tough. Like, I'm blessed and cursed to have been born into the most, I think, the most difficult generation for homosexuals, particularly gay men. Yeah. And that forged me. I really do believe I was forged in a fire.

Yeah. And – It is – it's amazing the difference because my – I have an 18-year-old son who's gay. I know. Who came out to us when he was 11. Yeah. And just – and then – and like I say, I say often, I say he came out to us when he was 11 and then we didn't talk about it for about six years because he just –

It's still wonderful. Yeah, because it was – and anyway, who wants their parents in on their sexuality or on their burgeoning identity? I know. Why would you want your parents in that? I'm not always of Kurt Russell for a dad. But it's – well, and also too, he had the benefit of growing up in Los Angeles. Oh my God.

When you told me that, I was like, I'm moved. He's, for me to bring in his prom picture of him, because he has a boyfriend that they've been together for about two years and they are just the most lovely couple, not just in i mean they're beautiful people but they're also just both of them are just really sweet wonderful people and they have such a loving relationship and and they uh like like for me to bring their prom picture to work and to show it to to the gays at work here, my gays.

What are you, Kathy Griffin now? I sure am. No. No, but like I showed it to some of the men here at work. Older men? Yeah, and it's really hard for them. Oh, we're broken. In one sense, it's beautiful and they're so happy.

And then another sense, there's this, why couldn't I have had that? Oh, there's a fury. Why couldn't I have had that? Oh, no. And it's entirely relatable because, yeah, why the fuck couldn't you have had that? You know, just because of stupidity. That's where I'm at right now in my life, looking at it and going, holy cow, did we suffer? And I look at men my age, and I just think, we're just a wasteland. We're wrecked and ruined. And I'm trying very hard to put myself

back together again. But there's another thing, and I don't know if we discussed that time at your house, but I had to go into therapy for it. And that was my fury and my jealousy. Yeah, yeah. And to think that, and particularly for me, it was particularly intense because I'm like, I helped create this world. You're a public figure, yeah. I helped build this building and there's no room for me.

Yeah. No apartment for me. Yeah. And that broke my heart and i went because and my therapist had a gay son too and he was like 16 he was exploring drag and my first impulse was i want to kill you all yeah yeah i i guess he was like when it went when men you talk about their their gay son and they're not infuriated or disgusted, there's a part of me that can't believe it. Yeah.

Like, I understand it on paper, but I don't know if it's really possible for me to believe that they mean it. And I'm so hurt by society, what it did to us, that I'm just waiting for the turn. Yeah? Yeah. The turn in you? Going bad again. No, I'm waiting for society to turn on us again. But what about a turn in you?

That's the thing. You're the one that, you're one person that helped me with that. We had that discussion when I talked about this. And you said, think of it as having a child. You've given your whole life to them. You've sacrificed your life for that child and they don't give a fuck. Yeah.

And really, they don't have to. Yeah. And I thought a lot about what you said to me and I went, well, that's a very, have you ever said anything wise before? Once or twice. I mean, because I know you're hilarious and you're smart, but I went,

is this fucker getting wise? Well, that's it. That's our 100th episode. Thank you so much for listening to it. And thank you very much for your continued listenership. Doing this podcast was not anything that I really thought that I was going to do, and I was given the opportunity and came up with the concept. And so far, it's been a really enriching part of my life. And I hope that it can be that way for you too. I mean, of course,

I want it to be fun and funny and make you laugh, but I also hope that by hearing people talk about what they've gone through, that you can somehow get some solace or some information and, you know, maybe, maybe affect a change in your own life. But anyway, I love that you listen and I, I want you to keep listening and we'll be back next week with 101 and we'll start our next 100. Thanks very much. Bye-bye. The Three Questions with Andy Richter is a Team Coco and Your Wolf production. It is produced by Lane Gerbig, engineered by Marina Pice, and talent produced by Kalitza Hayek.

The associate producer is Jen Samples, supervising producer Aaron Blair, and executive producers Adam Sachs and Jeff Ross at Team Coco, and Colin Anderson and Cody Fisher at Earwolf. Make sure to rate and review The Three Questions with Andy Richter on Apple Podcasts. Can't you tell my love's a-growing? Can't you tell my love's a-growing? Can't you tell my love's a-growing? This has been a Team Coco production in association with Earwolf.