The Three Questions with Andy Richter - Atsuko Okatsuka: Wedding Stories (The Andy Richter Call-In Show Re-Release)

Episode Date: February 27, 2026

This week, we're looking back at one of our favorite episodes of The Andy Richter Call-In Show - it's Atsuko Okatsuka talking Wedding Stories! In this 2024 episode, callers share tales of songs wedding singers refuse to perform, a failed wedding livestream, a very eccentric wedding crasher, and much more. Want to call in? Fill out our Google Form at BIT.LY/CALLANDYRICHTER or dial 855-266-2604. This episode previously aired on SiriusXM’s Conan O’Brien Radio (ch. 104). If you’d like to hear these episodes in advance, new episodes premiere exclusively for SiriusXM subscribers on Conan O’Brien Radio and the SiriusXM app every Wednesday at 4pm ET/1pm PT. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Yeah. Otsko Akatska. Otsko, Akatska. Wedding stories. Wedding stories. Otsko Akatska. And me telling and listening to Wedding Stories. Hi, everybody.

I now have to join ASCAP because of that because I just wrote a song. It's the Andy Richard Call-in Show. We're talking wedding stories. 855-266-2-604. And I'm here with the hilarious Otsko Akatska is here to tell me all about her wedding, to dish the dirt. Yay. Hi, Andy. Thanks for having me.

Yes, I can, and I will. Yeah. And I'm about two in three, two. Is that how goes? Well, no. Did you want to count down? No, you don't even have to tell. You know, people when they guest host on this show, they often feel the pressure of like, if the topic is.

is ghost stories. Like, I need a ghost story, but no, you don't have to, you know. Yeah, because it might be too soon for them. Yes. You know, what if I'm not ready to talk about my marriage of seven years yet? Right, right. You know? Seven years.

Or three months. Who would have thought that green card deal would have worked out? A hundred percent. Who would have thought? For him? For him? Yes, he's a lot being laborer. For Ryan Harper and Gray.

That's right. Yeah. No, actually, so we didn't. We're married for seven years, right? But then like six months ago we realized we weren't actually married that whole time. Oh, that's right. I forgot about that. You guys, like, what was there like a clerical error?

Or did you not file paperwork? What was it? Yeah, it was paperwork error on our part because it's too easy for people to get married. Yeah. For straight people to get married. Right. Right, right. You know, you just need, yeah, you just go, I like this person.

I like this person. We got rings. Yeah. And then you invite people. to a venue and we got married. But she never went to the city and applied for a license and all of that. I guess there's two paperwork things you're supposed to do. You know this.

Yeah, I just got married last year. Yeah. So yeah, but I don't, I do remember we had to go to like one of the, I don't even remember, you know, like city. It's called Registrar County Office. Yes, exactly. Yes. I do remember, because we were in East LA, it was like on Figaroa, I think.

Oh yeah, yeah. We had to go somewhere far for the second time. The first time we didn't go anywhere, right? Because obviously we didn't turn it in. So like after the wedding, you know, we were partying, drinking probably too much. And then there's a paper that you're supposed to have people sign two witnesses. And you turned that in. We didn't do that.

So, yeah, I was trying to get him on my health insurance. That's how I found out. The city of Los Angeles, I was talking to someone there. And she was like, sweetie. You're not married? Yeah. She was like, there's no record of you two ever getting married. Wow.

Yeah. You could have totally been fucking around on him for years. Oh my gosh. This whole time we were just boyfriend and girlfriend. Ugh. Oh, we were just good friends. What a waste. Think of all that emotional work you did for nothing.

Yeah. Yeah, I know. You know what? I'm going to re-lose that paper. We're going to reopen up that relationship and say, let's do it again. Yeah. For the things we're missing out on. You never know.

Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Well, you guys at least, my wife changed her name to, she's Jennifer Herrera, and she just became Jennifer Herrera Richter. Yeah. And that, because my ex-wife never changed her last name, which I don't, I wouldn't change my last name for some, I mean, or I would. I don't know if it really mattered to him. It never mattered to me. You didn't want to be Andy Herrera? Herrera, yeah.

I mean, I think it would, it would be false advertising. If they see Andy Herrera's coming and then this fucking vanilla pie walks through the door. Right. Then the community would be like, oh, man again. Oh, what are you doing here? Oh, man. We were expecting, you know, like a hunky Latino. If a Latino is correct anymore, right, it might be a Latinx male.

No, not bummed that. It was going to be a hunky one, a hunky Latin guy. But it was more like, oh, man. Oh, man. More whitey. Yeah, again. Another whitey. Taking our role.

Yeah. I mean, because we joked that my husband take my last name, Ryan Harper Okatska. But then, you know, that would be, you know, people have gotten in trouble for that before. Like in Ghost in the Shell, the movie. Oh, right. Exactly. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah, but that was a huge pain in the ass for her. And she also, too, she has a dual citizenship in the UK. So she even had to, like, fly to the UK to go get that paperwork to take. Oh my gosh. And that flight time of like, I don't know, eight hours or something, that's enough time to kind of just double check with yourself. Right.

Do I really want to do this? Oh, it was too late. I'd already adopted the kid and everything, so it was too late. She had no choice. And also, I'm a fucking prize. Yeah. You know, oh, she's totally got the best end of that deal. That's why she took your last name and not vice versa.

Right. Exactly. Yeah. Exactly. And I'm a known brand. Andy Richter, there's like 35 people out there that that's meaningful to. That's, there's more than that. Come on, look at you.

Right behind you, Andy Richter call in show. That's you, baby. Somebody made a logo, and we had meetings about the logo. You have multiple locals. There were like four meetings about, like, what we should do with the logo. See? And I get to go like, no. Yeah.

How many meetings is your wife in about, you know, her logos? You have two logos. You've got three questions with Andy Richter. Right. That's a different logo. That's a different logo. And there's been a series of logos. Yeah.

I'm in it for the logos. And so is she. And so is she. And the nooky. The nooky. All right. Well, we should probably go to the phones. Let's do it.

The people need us. Is there anything about did your wedding? It was just a fun party? Was there anything that really happened at the wedding? The first one? The first wedding. The first one. Oh, did you go ahead and have a full on?

second wedding party? We know. You would have gotten an invite. Oh, right. But we had to bring two witnesses who were at the wedding to bring back to the Registrar County office the second time. So it was like we had a, we were like, well, should we just go out to lunch and just call it our second wedding?

So we did do that. Oh, I see. It was very chill. Kind of sad. And you did have to go back and prove it was the first time not just do it all over again. Yes, yeah, we had to, yeah, we had to prove. That's all. We just, we had to pay, all it was, was pay $100.

and have the two witnesses say, yes, we already watched these dumb, dumb, say, I do. They were pissed. Yes. They were pissed. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, I, well, I mean, it was in, it was actually in the paper and stuff that, but Conan married us because we didn't want to have a minister. And a friend of my wife's was going to do it.

And she's one of those, you know, like classified ads ministers for whatever one of those churches is. and she wasn't able to do it. And so we were sitting there like, oh, what are we going to do? And I said, well, I think I remember the name of that church. And I was thinking, like, I would have my adult son just get certified and then he could marry us. And I open up the webpage for the place. And the first place I see is Conan O'Brien's big old head on their page. And I'm like, oh, yeah, right.

He already did. And I had forgotten that he had gotten ordained because he married our costume designer to his husband on the air in New York years ago. And I was like, oh, and he was coming to the wedding anyway. So I just was like, hey, will you, if I give you, you know, one sheet of script to read, would you marry us? So, you know, he married us. Oh, poor son. Yeah, yeah. Son could have done it.

Yeah, but that would have been a full circle moment, very Lion King. And he could have, yeah, and then he could have had a business on the side of marrying people. Yeah, who needs more money? I would say your son than Conan, but. Yeah, no kidding. Yeah, but you know what, congratulations. Thank you, you too. Thank you.

Congratulations on doing it twice. A hundred percent. Yeah, yeah. It's the second time I was undocumented. And I didn't know. And I didn't know. Full circle. Yep.

I did it twice, but it was not as happy as you're doing it twice. Hey, it's not a competition. It's not a competition, except for in my brain all the time. Everything is a competition. Let's go to the phones if you want to be in on this and talk about wedding, your wedding stories. 855-266-2-4. Let's go to our first caller. Mike, hello, Mike, from Washington.

Are you there? Yeah, can you hear me? I can. You've got Andy and you've got Otzko. Hi. Thank you. I'm so excited for this. So go ahead. Tell us your wedding story. Okay. So this was about 15 years ago, and I was at a wedding, and the bride was a friend of mine.

Now, we'd gone through a lot of the wedding, and the best man was the groom's younger brother. Now, this was actually one of the better best man speeches I'd ever heard. He had, he had like a good theme to it, where the idea was relationships, they kind of change over time as you get older. But as long as, you know, you have a foundation of love that can keep the relationship. relationships really strong. And then he was kind of telling stories from different periods of his life and his brother's life to kind of reinforce this theme. Like it was pretty good. But they get to the part where they're talking about when they're preteens. And he's telling this story about they're these boys out in the desert outside of Las Vegas. And what they would do to entertain themselves was they would use a slingshot and they would use it to shoot birds and small mammals. And then when these animals, had died, they would pose them, and then play with the bodies. And so, like, the birds, they would turn it into, like, a little glider to throw around. Sure. Like, they'd use, like, squirrels to, you know, like, almost like action figures.

Yeah. And, like, and he actually started, like, weeping because this was such a beautiful story to him. And the whole, the whole room just turned from this, oh, this is really sweet to just this, oh, oh. Yeah, we're at a superlip. killer's wedding. I checked in with the bride a few years later. She's still alive. Yeah.

Yeah. Still alive and untaxidermied? I believe so. I mean, I guess it's possible that her husband was just impersonating her. I mean, I don't know. Yes. Hello. This is Amber.

Oh, my God. Well, did anyone, like, clue in the brother that this is not, that the speech was having an effect other than what he had intended? I really don't think so. And to like, I mean, how do you even ask your friend about that? Did he realize this is how this played? Like, did nobody vet this ahead of time? Yeah.

And I mean, we were all just so stunned that we just, it was one of those things that my classmates and I just never spoke of again until a few years later. We were just too shocked. Wow. I feel like usually you do kind of, what you do is just kind of look around the room and if everyone's mouth is like a gape, shocked. Yeah. You know, not crying emotionally like you are. You might go, oh, okay.

Yeah. Different vibes. I wonder if he was so focused on his note cards that he just, you know, like couldn't read the room. The audience too closely and you won't get distracted, you know. Well, I also think, too, that maybe someone who thinks it's a natural thing to play with, dead animals maybe is not good at reading rooms. Right. Just like that might be part of the same profile.

Right. Because, yes, usually that's under the same as when you, like you said, serial killers would be kind of in that rain. Although, you know what, I do think about it because I grew up in the country and my friends and I had BB guns and we would shoot at things. And I think I might have killed a bird once. But I didn't play with it. So maybe I just killed a bird for no reason other than, you know, being 10 and being having a gun, you know, a baby gun.

Yeah. But just wanton destruction of, you know, a young male. But at least they got some playtime out. Yeah, what they did was make use of it. Yeah, they did. It's like either that or eat it. Right. You know what I mean?

Right. You eat what you hunt or you play doll. They did not feed their bellies. they fed their souls. Yeah. Like making the dead animals and the dolls. And now they are the grown men today. They have at least each other and the guy has his wife.

Yes, that's right. That's right. Exactly. They're probably in the upcoming administration. All right. Well, thank you so much, Mike. And have a happy holidays. I'm going to say that to everybody this week.

Yeah, you do. Yeah. Have a good one. Bye, Mike. Bye. Bye. All right. Next up, we got Vick.

from Pennsylvania. Vicki, you've got a wedding story for us. Yeah, I do. You can hear me all right? I'm walking. Oh, okay. Yeah, it does sound like you're in a low-force gale. Well, welcome to Pittsburgh. That's what, you know, that's what we're here for. My wedding story is I was with my wife for like nine years before we even got the way to marry. Yeah. And so we went debating doing something big, something small, whatever we wanted to do. But then, lo and behold, Donald Trump got elected, and we were panicked that they would return to gay marriage.

Yeah, yank the matrimonial rug out from under you. Yeah, I mean, they wanted to make sure that gay people couldn't suffer as much as straight people. So what we did is in Pennsylvania, you can do a self-use. uniting license where you and your spouse can just sign along with two witnesses and when bam you're married so we're like we picked two friends that we loved daily one was gay and one was straight we went to a gay bar to have dinner drinks and to sign the license so we sign the license we're having dinner or having drinks we're having a great time and this woman just wanders up to our table of four pulls up a chair plops down and starts hanging on my

my dear friend trying to hit on him. But then she starts talking about how she has purcocet, lighted in, cocaine, and any other drug that you could possibly find on the street in her person, did we want any? And we're like, no, thanks. See, that's what you call a wedding present. That's wedding present. Unexpected. Yeah.

Yeah, but I might accept that from somebody in there, but not necessarily. from a stranger who just locked up to you. Yeah, exactly. Vicki, is it a celebration or not? Well, at that point I had enough scotch to me that it wasn't a celebration. Yeah, that is true because it's like, yeah, here's a percassette, and then you just pop a pill from some stranger. You don't know what you're taking.

Oh, my God, it was ridiculous. I mean, and she had to know she was in a gay bar, and that the likelihood of the man she'd draped all over is gay, He looks gay, he sounds gay, he is gay. Yeah. And she just sort of let him alone. She kept offering more and more drugs, and we're like, no, thank you. You, don't know.

Anything about you go away, you go away to save our lives. Yeah. She probably thought she could change him. Yeah. Yeah, that happens on occasion, but. Not very often. Not very often. Yeah.

Not very often. Yeah, yeah. But we've been married ever since. So, well, congratulations. 2007. Congratulations. Yes, congrats.

And, you know, and just, that's what you, you got to stay out of those gay bars. Those gay bars are just, they're full of sin and sinners. Yeah, go to the straight ones where it's really safe. And bad things never happen and no drugs at all. Nothing ever happens at the straight bars. Yeah, like kidnappings or trafficking. Yeah. Right.

Or you could do what I do and just. Of paupers, yeah. Yes, poppers. Yes. You could just do what I do and stay home and never go anywhere. That's the safest back. Yeah, that's my favorite straight bar. It's just me, myself. All right, Vicki. Have a good one, and have a happy holidays, and get out of the cold. I will do my best. Okay. Take care. All right, bye, Vicki. Thanks.

All right, this is the Andy Richter-Callens show. We're taking wedding stories, me and Outska-Ocatska. We're at 855-266-2-604 if you want to share a wedding story with us. We got another caller from Pennsylvania. We're really demographically heavy from Pennsylvania today. We got Shay. What's up, Shay? Hi. I'm actually a wedding singer.

Oh, wow. Wow, great voice. A little different twist down this lane. So you've been to how many weddings do you think you've been to? Oh, God. Uh, since 2016, definitely lost count. Wow. But, you know, I really truly wish that I could find out which ones were still together.

Yeah, yeah. I have theories, but, you know, I'll never know. Well, that, and then you could like, you could take grandiose credit for it. Like, I knew, you know. I know, right? Yeah. My, I knew my singing would tear them apart or slash bring them together, keep them together. Damn it, I, I thought that they wanted me to sing Katie Perry today.

Okay. Well, okay. I mean, do you have any particularly good stories from your, you know, career as a wedding chanteuse? I do. I do. So a few years back, I was doing a wedding gig where I was not the lead person in the band, but it was already proven to be a very bizarre crowd. And they had also gone all out where they hired a full 10-piece band. And they also had hired lighting technicians to help with these sparklers that were surrounding the band. and these things shot up like eight feet high. They were just tremendous. And, you know, the pyrotechnics were definitely in effect that night. And they were, were they continuous or did they just go off for a while and then stop? The guy, the technicians in the back were setting them off at particular time.

So anytime there was a dramatic entrance or a cake cutting, they would go out. I see. It was a nice little flare. So this thumb of a woman kept approaching the band throughout the night and interrupting. different musicians, just no social, spatial awareness for anything that we were doing. And she kept asking if she could plug in her phone to play a song. And this is not allowed. You know, the brides typically warn us like, hey, Uncle Ned is going to want to play with, you know, with you guys on any Doobie Brothers songs that you do.

Please tell him that he's not allowed to. But this woman, I don't know who she was. And she would not take no for an answer. So finally at one point, I see her a. approached the band. It must have been her fifth or six time approaching us. And the lighting technician who looked like very Circa adventures and babysitting Dawson's garage, Vincent DiNaprio type, he sets off the sparkler that was directly in front of the woman to make her jump back. Oh my gosh. And she left this alone the entire duration of the rest of the night. And I just looked at him with just such adoration. And to this day, I know his name. But wherever he is, I just hope his pillow is always cool at night. night he saved our life that night wow wow yes with the threat of the facial burns

that is that's what it takes yeah yeah I never thought to carry something like that around when I'm walking home alone yeah yeah right yeah it's some pyro yes pyro perfect determined yes very katy perry very fireworks you could add that to your brand the pyro purse I will the pyro purse. Do people ever, like, hit on you? You ever get, you know, because weddings do tend to be sort of, have an amorous sort of energy. It's funny that you say that because typically I'm the only woman in the band,

so the guys don't always get it. But, yeah, I've had people lean in close to me, and I'll think that they're trying to request a song. But I had this one guy that just leaned in and he whispered to me, you're a goddess. And then I just, Thank you. And then he just, throughout the night, I would just see him like, where's Waldo at any given area of the room?

It was just, please don't do that. Just tears streaming down his face, eyes locked onto you. Oh, that's Uncle Ned. Oh, that's him. You know him. Yeah. What's your most dreaded request? Oh, God.

You know, I heard that you did Sweet Caroline at the Mass. On the Mask singer, I did, yes. I call it the white national anthem. Yeah, I'm even my mom knows it. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, I could do without hearing that for the rest of my career. Yeah, yeah, I could see that. But, you know, yeah, I thought it was a crowd pleaser.

It is. I mean, I'm a mass singer, except in my case, they voted me off right away. Oh, my gosh, from that song? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, wow. Did they at least joined in? Yeah, oh, no, they joined in, but I think, I honestly think that, like, I thought, like, oh, yeah, this is such a popular song, but I'm old.

And I think most of this, and you're basic, you know, it's the studio audience voting for whether or not you go on on the mass singer. And I think they were much younger. So they were like, and you don't, it's really weird because you don't, you are very much like secluded. And the security in terms of protecting your identity is absurd. Like I, for a rehearsal, I got out of the car. and I was wear and they when you get into the car they send a car to pick you up you put on a hoodie

and gloves and a hat and the hood and then like a big face mask one of those big face shield sort of sunglasses things and I was not wearing socks and I was started to get out of the car and I was just wearing like you know vans kind of shoes

and the producer was like you have to put socks on oh yeah like in case in case someone figure out I was Caucasian, then they would narrow it down. And they'd be like, oh, it's Andy Richter. I'd know that white ankle anywhere. But so we never saw many of the other, I didn't see many of the other singers.

And I would just kind of like hear the other songs kind of, you know, through the wall. And I didn't recognize any of them. So I just was like, I did, you know. You were like, wow. Yeah, I just think I'm too old. I find myself having to learn a lot of new material, especially for, you know, their first dance request because I'm I'm an elder millennial and I've Gen X siblings so it's not typically my scene I have to study up a little bit more on the Harry Styles Taylor Swift type

stuff yeah right right you're out there singing 360 or 365 the remix 365 potty gal 365 potty gal you know I don't even know what that is that's Charlie X yeah it's it's Charlie X X X X I think Bob Sieger I mean remember it was a brat election. I won't remind us. It was a brat summer. Yes. I do remember that. All right. Well, say, thank you so much for the call. Have a good holiday season. Thank you. This is a dream come true. Oh, gosh. Thanks so much. Next up, we have Lucia or Lucia or I don't know how you would want to pronounce this depending on whether you're from Calgary. Well, you're from Calgary. How do you say, is it Lucia or Lucia? Lucia. Calgary was not a hint.

Lucia. Lucia. Lucia. Lucia. Calgary is just a happenstance. Because, yeah. Because in Italian, isn't it Lucia, like Santa Lucia? If I was Italian, yes, but I'm Portuguese. Oh, oh, well, then, excuse me.

Ooh, okay. Oh, la, la. Spicy either way. So culture. All right, Lucia. First of all, how is it in Calgary? Is it freezing? No, actually, it's not too bad right now.

We had, like, a spate of, like, negative 20 degrees. But right now, it's, you know, normal winter. It's so cold up there. Just that prairie. You know, the prairie is the coldest place. But it's a dry cold. It's not bad. That's true.

That is true. You get used to it. Yeah. And you just stay indoors for three months. Right. And build on your personality. Right. Yeah.

Right. Yeah. Learn Portuguese at home. Well, tell us about your wedding story. Yeah. Well, so my husband and I actually ended up getting married three times. Wow. She's got you beat by one.

Yeah, wow. I got married twice, yes. Well, just wait. We got married with the Justice of the Peace in the mountains and the Rocky Mountains. Beautiful, simple ceremony with a couple of friends and our parents. It was beautiful. But both of our parents are Catholic. And so after that, they were like, okay, this was nice, but where's the real wedding?

So we were like, okay, I guess we've got to do the church thing as well. So then we did a very small, like two friends. in the church. Now it's, you know, ordained by God. Right. So we were happy there. Right. Exactly. And then you had, you had one other friend there. God. God. God came to that wedding. Yes. Yes. Yes. Of course. And then my husband's family, uh, who is from Mexico, we're all like, well, what about us? We want to be there. So then we went to Mexico and had a big party, which that one was more like that one looked more like a traditional wedding, but it actually had no legal aspect to it whatsoever. So it was like the least real but the most real.

But did you exchange vows in front of the third one? Yeah, we did. Oh, you did? Oh, wow. It just doesn't actually like, yeah. And did you find your performance in saying I do was better by the third time around since you'd had rehearsal? Yeah, we had a few different options of how to say it.

And so, yeah, we had nilled it down by the third time. Yeah, yeah. Do you say the same vows every time then? You just repeat it every time? No, actually, because it was written by the Efficient each time, and so it was a little different, which was nice. Yeah, nice. He kept us on our toes anyway.

But the whole thing is after all that, we weren't actually married because the first one, the Efficient did not submit the paperwork, even though she told us she would. Oh, my gosh. That sounds so familiar. Did you have to do a fourth? Yes, but at that point, we literally just like ran to, a registry office and backdated it and signed some paperwork.

That was not like, you know, not like a wedding. Right, right. Oh my gosh, that's exactly what I did. Wow. Yeah. So do you, well, what do you celebrate as your anniversary date? One, two, three, or four? Good question.

We actually celebrate three only because that's the date I liked the best. Oh. Wow. Don't tell you, don't tell your parents, the ones that really wanted that. church wedding. Yeah. God will be like, that date doesn't ring a bell to me. I know.

That's a big guy to upset, too, actually. Did you even consider for a more, I mean, I don't know how religious you are. I'm assuming not very because you did a civil ceremony the first time, but did you consider saying, nah, we don't really need to do the church thing. Or were you just like, yeah, sure, why would not? Why not? It was a why not. You know, make our mom's happy, not a big deal. No skin off our backs.

Yeah. Yeah, when we got married, because my wife was raised Catholic, and one of the places that we considered was, it was like this kind of old hotel with its own chapel, but in order to get married in the chapel, it had to be Catholic, I guess, because it was like consecrated as a Catholic church. Yeah. And I was like, yeah, sure, whatever. And my wife was like, no, no, no, no priests. So like, well, okay, you know, it didn't matter to me. Yeah, that's what Mike Barbiglius is about Catholics. About what was he said? Oh, no, once they grow up, they're all atheists, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, exactly. Because, yeah, this was about 10 years ago, and if it was happening today, I probably

would say, no, absolutely not. Yeah, they got to figure that out. That's bad for the brand. I know, I know, I know, because then they turn into comedians and they talk about it. Yes, exactly. They have a big microphone. They get on satellite radio, and they crack wise about God. Yeah.

You know. All right, Lucia. I'm going to help. We're all just going into the ground, I think. You know? That's all, yeah. Oh, just think of the rest. Oh, such a nice man.

And you've achieved so much. You got married four times. Yes. Yeah, wonderful. Yep. Thank you so much. It was really lovely speaking to both of you. Thank you so much.

And happy holidays. Happy holidays. All right. Bye-bye. I mean, I could have been safe saying Merry Christmas with her, I think. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, she would have been, you know.

As far as I know. She might be pagan, though. I didn't want to ask. We don't want to cancel you right now. We don't. Andy Rick Carlins Show, 855-266-2-604. We're taking wedding stories, me and Otko Okatska. Hey, you know what?

Before we're finished, I do want to tell everybody you can watch Otko's comedy special The Intruder on HBO right now, and you can find her tour dates at Otzko, which is A-T-S-U-K-O-com. Otko-com. you'll be touring Europe next year. I'll be there in February. Ooh, la la. When it's so cold, speaking of the cold.

Yeah. I know. That's really fun, though. You've done Europe before, though, haven't you? This is my first time doing Europe. Oh, you did Asia, right. I did Asia. Yeah, yeah.

Places American comedians don't go to. Right. I was performing in Jakarta, Malaysia, Taiwan. And selling well, I would think, yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, that's great. Yes, and just doing stand-up in English, the way I do it here. Yeah, yeah.

I didn't have to change it. That's so great. It's so, I'm so happy for you, you know, that you're. Oh, thank you. No, because, I mean, I first knew you from a clip online of you reacting to an actual earthquake while you were on stage. Yes. And you were so funny in that clip, I was like, well, I'll follow her. And then, you know, and then, you know, we became friends.

And it's just, it's so great that you've taken off the way you have. Thank you. Thank you. You know, we both thrive in chaos. I think that's why. I guess so. The fellow weirdos see me. Yeah, yeah, that is.

I mean, the weirdo part, yeah, definitely. The chaos part, I'm kind of like, I don't really want to make that part of my brand. I don't think. No, no, you're done with that. Yeah. You're done with that. I'm old and tired, but...

I'll get there soon. Yeah, yeah. Right now, I'm like, yeah, give me Hollywood and Highland. Give me, you know, give me street noise. Give me Lise. Give me Carnegie Hall. Yeah, give me streets. Give me scary alleys.

Yeah. You know, right now. Wow. Yeah. No, but I mean, it's so great. I love that it's like it's when somebody good gets big and popular. That's, it makes you feel like, oh, well, okay, the world isn't complete shit. Oh, that's so sweet.

You know what I mean? Because there's a lot of people out there that are big that should not be big. That are not funny and not good. Checks and balances. And that's for my next show. I'll tell you who all of them are. Yeah. They know who they are. Name names.

No, I won't. All right. Next up, Tim from Wisconsin. Hi. Hi. Hi, Tim. Today is actually my anniversary. Oh, congratulations. Oh, happy anniversary. Which one?

I'll say four, four years. Nice. Do you want me to jump into the story? Please do. Oh, yeah. So me and my now wife, we were engaged for about eight or nine years, actually. Oh, well. Foot dragger, eh?

Yeah. And then pandemic rolls around 2020, and we said, you know what, let's just get married. We'll go to the courthouse. We'll stream it to all our friends. That'll be that. So we organize it. You know, no guest list is too big at that point. So everybody we've ever met gets this Facebook invite.

We are at the courthouse. We got the judge, the guy taking the pictures. and my wife's sister to stream it on my phone. I hand her my phone, I launch everything, we're good to go, go through the ceremony. You know, hey, you're married. I have her sister hand me the phone back and realize I never hit stream.

No. It didn't go out to anybody. It actually went out for about 30 seconds when she handed me the phone back and I hit what I thought was stopped. So they got a video of my feet for about 20 seconds. Oh. Oh, my gosh.

And how many people do you think we're supposed to be watching? I mean, we threw out so many invites. I figured about 100 people maybe. Oh, wow. And it was like, hey, it's going to be about this time. Just look for the stream to start. And I felt awful. It was 100% of my fault.

I told my sister-in-law, it's ready to go, just point. And that's what she did exactly what she was supposed to. I'm panicking, picturing the next, hopefully many anniversaries having to live this down. And in the back of my mind, I'm thinking, can we do it again? But, you know, this is an official thing. We're in a court house. I don't think the judge is going to go from that. And bless this judge's heart, he just leans in and he looks at us.

He's like, we can do it again. Oh, good. Oh, that what a nice judge. Yes, it's a very nice guy. So, fired the phone up correctly this time. I'm triple checked it. Streamed out again. Nobody really knew the difference

other than there was a short stream of my feet beforehand. And both my wife and I loved it because we got to go through the whole vows and everything twice. So we frequently bring it up that we got married twice. Oh, that's nice.

That's nice. Yeah, now see, I would have just gotten on and been like, hey, everybody, sorry, I blew it. It's me. I fucked up. Sorry. The worst part is I'm in IT, so half the people watching were coworkers.

And I really never want to work. That's awesome. All right, well, Tim, happy anniversary and happy holidays. And thanks for the call. Thank you, big fan. Thank you. Here's too many more. All right.

Next up, this is exciting, Otsko. Who? Because we have an open policy here that if you have a good call or good story that's off topic, you can call in anyway, and we will take it. and we call that a wild card. Oh, no way. Yay. So we've got a wild card.

Joe from Minnesota. Joe, how are you? Hey, I'm good. How are you doing? Excellent, excellent. So tell us, first of all, do you have like any sort of, like theme for your wild card?

God, I love that sound. Yep, me too. That's why I said wild card. It's kind of a ghost story. Go ahead. Come back. All right. Yeah, sorry.

So, let's see. So didn't mean to make you clam up. I know, I know. You made him black out, Andy. We made just story shy. Sorry, sorry. I'll control myself. So when I was four years old, which was sort of in 1984, my brother, my cousin Brian was killed in a car accident.

Oh. And he was eight years old. And it was the first time that I'd ever, you know, I'm four years old. I'd never been to a funeral. Didn't really understand the whole death thing, right? So we're at his funeral. And I remember looking down into, you know, it was an open casket. And I remember looking down and seeing him there.

And I look across the room. And he's standing across the room with two other kids his age and some dude. And they're all wearing like these like off white kind of altar boy looking robes. And he looks really happy. Like, it looked like somebody had just told a joke. He was kind of like mid-lath. And I remember looking over, you know, across the church and then looking down to the casket and being like, why is he here, but also over there?

Wow. It was weird to me, right? But I'm four years old. I don't understand how anything works. I don't really think anything of it. Right. Until years later, I'm talking to my dad about it. And somehow, you know, my cousin comes up and I mentioned at the funeral, you know, I

I remember seeing him and he was joking around with the altar boys. And my dad said, Joe, it was a funeral. There were no altar boys there. Oh. So I don't know. What? What exactly I saw, you know, who my cousin was with. But, you know, wherever he was, he seemed pretty happy.

So, you know, I kind of took heart in that wherever he was, wherever he was, wherever he'd gone, that he was in a good place. So there was nothing about the appearance. Like they weren't, you know, you know, slightly shimmer. or anything like that? No, no, they look just like people, right? And I didn't know who the other two. There was one boy on his right, one boy on his left. My cousin was in the middle.

And there was an older person standing behind them who looked kind of exasperated, like, what do I have to deal with these knuckleheads? Wow. Because they were obviously still being kids even in whatever form they were in. Yeah, yeah. That's so wild. Wow. you know, not, I thought you were going to be like,

turns out he had a twin. That's where I thought the story was going, you know, yeah, where it's like, I don't know how the world works. I didn't know identical twins was a thing. But then I would have been like, why is he laughing at his brother's funeral? Right, right. You know, wow. Cousins.

Oh, right. Cousins. Well, I mean, no, if the kid who passed had a twin. And that's who Joe was seeing, actually, you know. Right. Yeah. Wow. Wow. And have you had any similar sort of like, you know, do you have the site now? Have you ever had it in any other form? I've never seen anything else. There was one time when I heard something behind me. Like I was in college, I was leaving this gym that we worked out in. I was the last person to leave after they closed up. And it was a really, really old building. And I'm walking. down the stairs and I hear the sound of like converse Chuck Taylor's squeaking behind me and like somebody is like running down the stairs and they get closer and closer and closer and I

actually move over to the right or left you know just to get out of their way. Yeah. And I turned around and looked and there was nobody there. Oh wow. Oh Joe. I think you I think you have the site. Yeah yeah and hearing. Yeah. You're surrounded by dead people all the time. Wow. Yeah. You have the That's got to put a cramp in your self-love life, if you know what I mean. Yeah, well, I mean, being raised Catholic on top of that. Right, exactly, yeah, yeah. Oh, Joe. Yeah, exactly.

Yeah, no, I would, the only time, and I told us, we did a ghost stories episode, and I heard a few days after my grandfather died, I was in my grandmother's house alone, and I heard him calling for her. Oh, wow. I was watching TV, and I heard him in the background calling for her. And that's the only even close to sort of like, you know, ghostly kind of experience that I've ever had. Yeah. Sure.

You know. Yeah, I've never had one. Yeah. But, you know, I'm open for more, universe, if you're listening. Oh. If the other side has a satellite radio subscription. All right. Well, thank you, Joe.

Thank you for that wild card. I know. Thank you. All right. And have a happy holidays up there. Thanks. Okay. Andy Richard Collin's show 855-266-2604.

We're going next to Georgia from Tennessee. Georgia, you've got Andy and Otsko. I'm both of you guys. I'm so happy to talk to you. That is so convenient because imagine if you hated one of us. I know. Or both. Or both.

And you were calling to say that. Yeah, that I would say you really should do something better with your time. Oh, stop it. Oh, okay. So my mama, my mama was on the show. He-Haw. Are you guys familiar with He-Haw? Yes. I am. I do not know. He-Haw. Is it like the gong show or something? No, He-Haw. He-Haw was sort of like Hillbilly S&L.

Oh, really? It was syndicated for many years. Or Laugh-In. Do you know laughing? Oh, yes, I do. Yeah. Oh, that's so fun. Okay. It was like Laughan country music. Yeah. But she was a lady to irons and yelled at her husband with the missing tooth in the middle. Anyway. That was your mother. Wow. I know exactly who you mean. Yeah. Ronnie Stoneman. on that. Okay. And she's been married six times. Wow. My dad was number-year. She just loves getting married. Oh, and she loved getting divorced, too. But anyway, her fifth marriage, she decided to kill two birds of one stone.

She had a fiddler convention, and her wedding was the fiddler convention. There were thousands of people there. That was so insane because you had like people there that were famous and people there that were just so talented. And she got married on the stage at a fiddler's convention. Wow. This wedding. I'm learning so many things like there's a fiddler's convention. Sure, of course there is. Right.

So everyone, the thousand people there are all fiddlers. It's fiddlest, yeah. Yeah, they were fiddlers and their family. It was like a contest and they would win money. You know, the thing is, is that by the time, the fifth... I feel like that's a good act five for the fiddler and... What's the musical call? I can't think of it right now.

Fiddler and the roof? Fiddler on the roof. On the roof. It ends with your mom getting married in front of a thousand fiddlers. On the roof. Come on. That would have been so much more fun. I was just saying that by the fifth time, you figure out a way to make the wedding a write-off.

You know what? That's probably what it was. It totally was. She did not pay a penny of post-tax dollars on that wedding because. People paid to come. Precisely. Oh, my gosh. She's charged.

Yeah. That's so smart. She's a genius. Brilliant woman, your mom. You think you're going to a fiddle fest, but really you're making a wedding present. Oh, I thought about doing that. Yeah. I see how people were there.

It's crazy. Oh, wow. I wanted to do a couple of a couple of fun. comedy show for my wedding and my husband was like can we please make this one thing just ours can you just for one time not make it about i agree with him 100% i was i did there was a guy that i used to do improv with who proposed to his fiance or his then you know they he proposed on stage at an improv show And even at that age, I was like, on the throne of insincerity, you're going to get down on one knee and ask someone to enter into like a lifelong commitment. Like, no, no, wait until after the show.

And, you know, better you do it in the bathroom than on stage. No, it's true. Absolutely. Yeah. Sometimes you just want an audience that paid, you know? Right, exactly. That's all. Well, so did the sixth one take?

Did she finally, did that one last? And is your mom... It did, but he passed away. Oh, okay. And mom passed away in February, but he passed away a couple years before she did. So I guess it took. They never got along, but... Well, I mean, you're asking a lot, really.

Hey. You know? Really. Yeah, yeah. Well, condolences on losing your mom. But you have these beautiful stories of her, and she is a genius. She really is. Oh, thank you.

Thank you. Well, thank you so much, Georgia. You should watch her play banjos. Well, I definitely, next time I see a he-haul clip, I'm going to think about this. Yes. Well, thank you. Thank you so much for taking my call. Y'all've made my day.

All right. Thank you, Georgia. Happy holidays. Lots of love. You too. All right. Well, Otsko, we're going to wrap it up. It's the top of the hour.

At the end of the hour, we usually pick a favorite. Do you have a favorite call? Oh, gosh. There's so, my memory, Andy, my memory. Believe me, I usually just wait for the person to pick one and then I agree because I have a hard time. I was going to say, let's go through them. There was a wedding singer. Oh, there was drugs at a bar, gay bar.

Right, right. There was, you know, the he-ha mom, fiddler. Honestly, my favorite is you fucking up your paperwork and having to get married again. Andy, you have to say that because I'm sitting right across from me. And I have your jacket hostage or your vest. Yeah, my sexy fleece vest. I have it. So you need it.

With the Chicago Cubs insignia. With the winter fast approaching, you're going to need this. I'm going to need that. This is why you chose mine. I'm going to need to keep my torso warm, but my arms free. Gosh, I don't know. There were so many good ones. I mean, and that was a good creepy, I mean, creepy but sort of sweet ghost story.

Yeah, the ghost story was very touching. I was like, now that's a movie. Yeah, yeah. So, yeah. Oh, gosh. And then the woman who, you know, maybe the woman who had to get married four times. That's an, yeah, yeah. Yeah, she put you to shame.

Yeah, because of that. Because it's, I'm making it about me still. I'm like, well, she won. It's what you do. She want. You got to do what you do. Yep. Yeah, so there's that.

All right. Well, the intruders on HBO, check that out. Ottocomedy.com. You got to go see this woman. She's hilarious. hilarious. Thanks so much. Thanks, Andy.

Thank you for coming and spending this hour with me. I really appreciate it. It was a true honor. All right. Well, thank all of you out there. We'll be back next week with another episode of the Andy Richter-Call-in show. And until then, go do some interesting things that you can call us next week about. Okay, bye.