The Three Questions with Andy Richter - Gareth Reynolds: Dad Stories (The Andy Richter Call-In Show)

Episode Date: July 11, 2025

Comedian Gareth Reynolds, host of the "Next We Have" podcast and co-host of "We're Here to Help" and "The Dollop," joins "The Andy Richter Call-In Show" this week to hear your DAD STORIES!Want to call in? Fill out our Google Form at BIT.LY/CALLANDYRICHTER or dial 855-266-2604 with whatever you want to discuss!This episode previously aired on SiriusXM’s Conan O’Brien Radio (ch. 104). If you’d like to hear these episodes in advance, new episodes premiere exclusively for SiriusXM subscribers on Conan O’Brien Radio and the SiriusXM app every Wednesday at 4pm ET/1pm PT.

Conan O'Brien Radio! Conan O'Brien Radio! Hello, Andy Richter here. I was listening to what was coming on before us and it was a Conan clip which I guess there's a lot of those on this channel and It was it sounded like somebody rolling in a clip from a movie that was largely action So there seemed to be a minute of grunting and

You know like footfalls. Is that what we're programming? The title was Colin Farrell crotch punch. Wow Colin Farrell that is my new you porn search phrase. Colin Farrell crotch punch with bush please. I don't like that shaved shit. I'm here today with Gareth Reynolds. Hi Andy. Hello Gareth. He's a Andy. Hello, Gareth. He's a comedian, podcaster, and writer. You know him as the cohost of Here to Help, which I've been on, which is a one,

you and Jake Johnson, you give advice, not that great of advice, but I mean, it's not terrible. Thank you. No, you're absolutely right. We're not, there's shrinks. No, you're absolutely right. We're not- You're not shrinks. No.

You're not lawyers. We even had to put a- No. And we're not doctors. We had a guy who called in a couple weeks ago who every time he'd go in the sauna would get up and there'd be a little brown mark on his towel. And Jake and I gave tons of advice. And everyone in the comments was like,

nobody suggested going to a doctor. And we were like, that's not bad. And then Jake was still dying on the hill going, you don't need to go to a doctor. You don't need to go to a doctor. Come on, you're good. You called us. You're leaking a little shit, that's all.

You're leaking, give it a shit leak. It's a sauna, we all sweat poop. So it works. So yeah, it's free advice that feels free, is what they say about We're Here to Help. And you also do the polyp. A polyp. Jesus Christ. That's what that guy had in the sauna.

That's fantastic that I just called it the polyp. I could not have tried harder. The dollop. The dollop. The dollop. you and Dave Anthony, and you've been doing that for years. Which feels like a pollop. Yeah, it's been around so long, it won't go away.

And you just never had it cut out. No, and it's time. Yeah, why bother? It's lingering. It's benign. It's benign, nobody really notices anymore. It's been around so long. Somebody has to have called it The Pollop before.

I don't think in as great a fashion as you. That's the best polyp drop. Oh, wow. That was really, really good. That was perfect. That was really, really good. That's as good as it gets. That's like calling my kids by the other kid's name. You know, they're... Yeah, but it's even better.

I don't even know, like, come on, give me a break. But they're always like... They're really annoyed that I would call them by another kid's name, you know? Do you ever... My mother will start going through dead animal names before she'll arrive to like my brother's sometime.

Like she'll be like, Titch! And I'll be like, Titch died in a fire 35 years ago. Yeah, Titch was a cat. That was a cat that's dead. His name's Nick, he's my brother. He came from you. Oh dear. Yeah, yeah.

No, I mean Nick is good. No, I am not offended by your polyp drop. I think that's fair. Okay, yeah. No, I mean Nick is good. No, I am not offended by your polyp drop. I think that's fair. I think it's probably a little Freudian. But you guys have been doing that for, how many years now? We're on 11. 11, wow.

Yeah, yeah, because it was like, we were talking before the show. It was like a podcast before, I mean, because I was on podcasts and I was like, what's a podcast? But I would do them because I'm just hungry for attention. I need to get out of the house. It's exactly how, that's exactly how I was beyond podcasts

and I'll be like, what is it? And even when we were probably a year into the dollop, I was like, what are we doing? I was like, why do I go to this man's house? Who is listening to these things? Yeah, I was like, where do we get these? Yeah, yeah. Where does all the talking go?

It goes through a tube? Yeah, yeah. But yeah, no, it's 11 years. Wow, congratulations. Well, see, you say that, but it's like, nobody can stop you. It's not like- Right, it's like having a lemonade stand for 11 years.

Yeah, it's not like- Right, they're not gonna tell you. I'm not Seinfeld. Stop squeezing those lemons. Yeah, Yeah, it's not like NBC, I'm not Seinfeld. Stop squeezing those lemons. Nobody, it's up to us. Right, exactly. So I guess congratulations, I don't know. It's you just keep putting pies on the windowsill. It's not good.

And hoping that somebody steals them. It's not good. You can find your tour dates. Are you touring all the time? All the time, but I also- BarrettReynolds.com I have a third podcast, Andy. No shit.

Yeah, and then a nightmare. Jesus, when will it end? It's, that's, that's where I'm at. Yeah, yeah. It's called, it's called Next We Have. Okay. And that's my new one. And it's like segments, it's quick hits.

It's really just silly, goofy. It's fun. It's like three to four segments of show, games, quick interviews. Just fun stuff. Fun, goofy. It's fun. It's like three to four segments of show, games, quick interviews. Just fun stuff. Fun. Sugar. It's sugar.

It's not like the polyp. Not like the fucking drudgery of this show. No, this has been... This is a chore. This is tough. This is tough. So fun. I am so sorry.

I know, it's just, I have this community service deal. Is that what it is? Is that what the ankle monitor's on? They me-toot the shit out of me a few years ago. You got hammered. And I said, you gotta do a radio call-in show. And I was like.

I me-toot, Jude, I don't know if you remember that. I came with a, I just wanted to get involved. I did, I did. I love a pylon. I know, but you knew I was handsy. Yeah, I did. No. When you got into that car. Well, listen, I mean knew I was handsy. Yeah, I did. When you got into that car.

Well, listen, I chose backseat. So, but yeah, you can find me on tour at garethrennels.com. I'm all over. Do you tour a lot? I do, I'm pretty much on the road most of the year. Oh, wow. Yeah, I go everywhere. I do like little traditional tours,

little runs, then take a month off, and then go like two months on. So it's... Is the road, are you good with the road now? You know, I started driving pretty much everywhere, which has made it way better. Oh, so like if you go to the East Coast, you just fly and rent a car and then just drive yourself?

Sometimes I'll drive to the East Coast. I have like a touring van. It's really dark and weird, but, and I've tried to, I carry- Is it soundproofed? It's sound, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, and there's like- Soundproof, and there's drains in the floor.

There's drains, and there's tarps, you can't see it. You know when you drive by a van on the freeway and you're like, that's, why are there so many beanie babies and that's all I can see? Bad stuff is going on here. That's what I'm rolling in. Windows down, a lot of towels like, stitched into the window. Sure, sure, sure.

But I've gotten pretty good at it. I do have like a portable, what I call kitchen, which is a hot plate and a frying pan. Really? Yeah, so I like cooking the room. It's weird. Yeah. It's super weird, but it's made me better at touring. Oh, that's good. Yeah, yeah. What, are you good on the road?

No, I was terrible at it. And I only did it sort of for a short time of like a touring kind of thing. And that was between the Tonight Show and the TBS show. Conan and I did like a... I'm very familiar. I don't know, maybe three months of a live tour, a live kind of variety-ish show.

Yeah, yeah. And I would not do well. I realized like I would be. It's hard. As fat as I could possibly be. That's why I bring the kitchen. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. The fattening on the road is really, it's hard.

And for me too, it is like this, it's totally. There's that me too again, by the way. It's emotional eating. It's just like, I'm unhappy, cause I'm, like I'm sick of being in airports and hotel rooms and so I'm gonna have whatever. Well, it would start from, like when I would just fly off, it would like, I would be good all week and it from, like, when I would just fly off, it would, like, I would be good all week,

and it would be like the second I got to the airport. Yeah. The wheels would come on, I'd be like, we're not even, we're in my home city still, and I'd be like, can I get a couple beers and fries? And I would just be like, this is really crazy. Do you have cheese, just straight cheese? Can I get some cheese?

Yeah. Big pile of cheese? Yeah, so it's not easy, but the fattening is real. Nice. Thank you. Well, I know I'm glad that you're coping. Cause yeah, like I say, I would not, I don't think I could handle it.

No. Yeah. You got a good thing here. I do. I do. I like being in one place for a while. And then I get crabby. Yeah. Our topic today, people out there,

which if you have something to tell us, give a call at 855-266-2604, we're telling dad stories because your dad is actually in the control room. My father, Peter, is here. He's visiting? He's visiting. Where does he live?

Milwaukee. Oh, Milwaukee. Yep, speaking of cheese. Midwestern. Yeah.'s he live? Milwaukee. Oh, Milwaukee. Yep, speaking of cheese. Midwestern. Yeah. So that was a Milwaukee accent that I heard. Well, he's got a, he's from England. Oh, that's what it means.

And Wisconsin. I thought it was pretty classy for Wisconsin. He sounds South African. The two melded together into like a blood diamond accent. They sound like a movie villain. Yeah. So that's why when he had to take a piss, he's like, we're looking for the toilet.

I'm looking for the toilet. I need to go to the restroom. Where are the facilities? Yeah. And I need access to the electrical grid. No, but we just thought, you know, father's day just passed, and you're a dad, are you not? No.

Oh, you're not. I have a cat. That doesn't count. Come on.'re a dad, are you not? No. Oh, you're not. I have a cat. I thought you were. That doesn't count. Come on. No, no, no. Please? Doesn't count.

All right, I have a son. Unless you birthed it. Well, I feel like biologically I'm gonna dig a hole here. Right, right, exactly. I'll make up a son. So yeah, I have a son. Jack. I keep calling him my cat.

I love Jack. Thank you. Yeah, yeah, such a good kid. He's a good kid. Yeah, yeah. What the hell of a kid. Thank you. Yeah, yeah, such a good kid. He's a good kid. Yeah, yeah. He's a hell of a kid. Shame you just disappeared, but you know. Hold on a minute.

Did you not disappear in my, no. Sorry. Andy. All of a sudden this has turned into who's afraid of Virginia Woolf? I killed the child. No, you can't! I take him back.

Yes, I did. There's no Jack. But yeah, I think fathers is a good theme. Yeah, and I certainly have him. I mean, you know, your dad in the short time I talked to him said wonderful things about you and said, you know, how nice that you treat him. And I don't think my father would say that about me. Is that right? Yeah. Do you feel like your kids treat you nicely?

Yeah, I do, but I also think that they are oblivious to me in a healthy amount in terms of just their ages. Right. The 24, 19, and five. Yeah. I mean, the five-year-old can be alternately meaner than shit to me and as sweet as you can possibly imagine. Yeah, right.

And I know, and she does tell me enough that she loves, she absolutely loves her daddy, even when she's mad, cause like I am the hammer, I am the dad. So I am the one that has to be. I like that nickname for you in general. Well. The hammer. The hammer, yeah.

No, I think, I definitely think that when I see my dad, I definitely do like to make him. It's also like his shoe situation was a shit shit. Like he showed up with shoes that just looked like they came from, so I bought him some new shoes, I got him insoles. Oh, wow. Yeah, so I'm, there's also some stuff where I'm going like, you know, he's got other kids, but I'm like,

someone's gotta step in in this shoe situation here. So I kind of stepped in regularly. Yeah, yeah. Are you that in your family? Cause I'm definitely like, I was just home in Chicago recently, and my mom lived in a condo that my sister and brother and I bought for her.

And she had one key. There was one key. And there was this, like, at dinner, complaining about how there's only one key and where'd the keys go. And, like, after after dinner with my mom, I had, she had a thing to go to. I dropped her off, I was, you know,

it was gonna be about an hour. I went and made like six fucking keys at the hardware store. Like what the fuck, what is with you people? Jesus Christ, go get a fucking key man, you know? Yeah. And she, you know, and she was very grateful. But I, and I mean, and my brother and sister are competent people, but it's just like-

But they're not, yeah. It's like, what do you, just get it done. Why, it stops the complaining. I think your heart's in the right place. Yeah. I think I am that. I think I do. I mean, I, but then if you look at me as a man, you'd be like, where are you for you?

But I definitely like- That's different though. I agree. That piece of shit, why should I do nice things for him? He's driving in a van with a kitchen. No, no, you mean me and you're absolutely right. No, I mean me. Oh, I mean us.

But no, I don't know. I think I do just, there are a lot of times where I just go like, yeah, I can help you really quickly with this stuff. I also, I like, am not a huge fan of our Amazon culture, but I have an account, which to both of my parents appears to be near a super power. Like literally, I'll be like, yeah,

I can get it to you tomorrow. And they're like, how? How? How does that work? I'm gonna pay a billionaire to drop it off your house tomorrow. So I think that helps a lot too. Everything I do is- What do you think all that child labor is for? Like, let's enjoy.

Well, my dad's South African. He knows the, he's a blood diamond trader for cry P. So no, so I definitely like, I think that helps. I take that, you know, that makes me seem better. Yeah, yeah. I am the Amazon guy. Yeah, yeah. Even though I hate it, but I still am like, I'm getting a portable air conditioner tomorrow.

Yes, sure. There you go. There you go. Quiet. We should go to the phones. Okay. I mean, it's right there in the name of the show, Colin. Yeah, no, let's be wrong to not.

You know, Jabber. Yeah, no, I agree. 855-266-2604 is our number. We got our first caller. CM from LA. CM, are you there? Hello? Hey, can you hear me? Yeah, now I can hear you.

Hello? Somebody push the right button and now I can hear you. Okay. All right, you got me, you got Gareth. Tell us your story. All right, well, I hope that I or my father don't get in trouble because of this story. Honestly, you know what? That is of no concern to me. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. All right. All right. So let her rip. All right. My father, he just turned 78 years old. I've always known him as,

he was a, he was a businessman. I've never,'ve never you know, very straight laced guy while I was growing up. And in his older age, he's kind of started to tell me some stories about his youth that I've really, I'm really surprised about. But he told the story about in 1968, he was kind of a hippie and he had hippie friends and they used to they were drug runners runners. They used to drive from the East coast to the West coast and pile. They would, they would line the cab of a Volkswagen bus with bricks of marijuana and then they just drive back and you know, make, make a bunch of money. And, uh, this one particular day they were driving back from California and the driver said, my dad was riding a shotgun and the driver said I need to

stop off for some gas. So he pulled off this highway in the middle of Wyoming and they went to this gas station where there were a bunch of these guys sitting in rocking chairs out in front of this gas station. This old timey kind of gas station. The guy that gets out of the car, the driver, he's got long hair, he looks like a hippie, and he's out there. And my dad said, he noticed that one of the guys in the rocking chair had said something to him. And he heard in a certain tone that he knew was kind of like mouthing off, the driver had said something back to them and then very quickly he puts the gas pump back in, gets in, he says, all right, we're getting out of here. My dad

said, well, what just happened back there? He said, it's nothing, it's nothing. He starts driving really fast and he gets back onto the highway and a Volkswagen Boss can't go that fast. Air-cooled, I believe. Right. A few minutes later he kept seeing the drive, his friend, I'm gonna leave out the name, just kept looking in the rear view mirror, and then he said, oh no. My dad looked in his mirror,

and he saw a line of about six or seven pickup trucks, gaining speed on them. Really, they're in the middle of nowhere, and so these are the only other cars that were on the road and they were flying up on them and like a writer sequel yeah very very much so yes before they knew it the first truck rams into the back of their Volkswagen bus oh dear and then he does it again and he does it again and these guys are all around them. Little did these guys in the pickup truck know that the third guy had been sleeping in the back of the cab.

And if you've ever seen the way that a Volkswagen bus, the back of the cab will open up just like the entire thing. Just it, it just before they knew it, the back of the cab of this thing just opened up and there's the third guy with a shotgun and he blows a hole right through where the driver is right through the windshield where the first truck is. And that truck just took just fell off into the into the embankment on the side of the freeway or the highway.

Right. Then he blows a hole through the next one, then the next one and he just shoots a hole through every single windshield. People definitely died that day. And then they closed up the thing and then they just took off and went back home and they didn't, they didn't speak of it again. And so my father told me. And your dad never asked what was the exchange?

What caused this exchange? It was something that one of those, those guys in the rocking chair had said to him and he was quick with some sort of response, saying something bad about them, that they were so insulted that some hippie guy from New England would say something like this. And that's basically, that's all I know. So like you said, potential murders happen this day. Yeah, when you say he put a hole in the windshield

where the driver would be. That's a nice way of saying. Yeah, with a shotgun. The driver's been shot. Yeah, yeah, that would be painful. And I can't imagine at no point during that being like, what exactly did you say? Yeah, exactly.

I mean, you've got from Wyoming to the East Coast. Well, and then three. Even when you sit down to have a meal, can, kids be like, hey, by the way. Well, they got away. So you would think of the rest of the road trip, you'd be like, okay, I'm dying. What was it? What was the quip? But I understand-

Unfortunately, that guy that, he's dead now, unfortunately, that guy, he died recently, so I'll never be able to ask him. The friend's dead. Yeah. So the only person alive is your father from the drug mule and gas. My father and the guy, well, and also the guy that was in the back. The shotgun guy. The shotgun guy. The shotgun guy.

Yeah. Well, Andy, how many murders get confessed on this show? Is that a regular? Is that? This is pretty spicy, I gotta admit. It's a good start, I gotta admit. It's a good start. I gotta admit. I also like that a guy just wakes up from a nap

and is like, I better shoot some people in the face. To go from R.E.M. to shoot, yeah. What the? Hold on. Open the hatch. No, they're following us. Bangity bang. No, they're our friends.

No, you won't, no. We're just having fun. We're fun friends! No, you won't, no! We're just having fun! We're funnin'! Oh dear. Well congrats to your father. Well see him, yeah. Tell him, you know, at least he's got that story. That's pretty exciting.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Made some good weed. Have you ever committed a murder? I, I'm, no, not at all. Okay, all right, good. Well, good. Well, happy Father's Day. At least you've broken the chain. Happy Father's Day.

Yeah. Yeah. It's not genetic. Thank you. Thank you guys. See you later, see ya. Bye-bye. All right, bye.

All right, next up we got Noah. Noah, hello. Hi, how are you? I'm good, where are you calling from, Noah? Vancouver, British Columbia. Love Whew. Noah, hello. Hi, how are you? I'm good. Where are you calling from, Noah? Vancouver, British Columbia. Love it. I love that town.

Oh yeah. Yeah. It's the best. It's very nice. So tell us what's your dad's story here. Slightly different direction than your previous caller. That's, you know what? That's what this show is all about.

Yeah, a different crime. Our palette is full of many colors. That makes me feel gross. So this happened in 2011. Okay. When I was getting married and my folks were helping out with some of the details with the wedding. Yeah. And after my mom and my now mother-in-law had spent an evening stuffing the envelopes, my dad's job was to take them to the post office to mail them out. And his hands were full when he got to the car, so he put the envelope, you know, the box with the envelopes on top of his car. And you'll never guess what happened next.

Oh, he mit Romneyed? He just, he just rolled. That's not the same. He didn't forget the dog was up there. That was intentional. That's what makes it okay. Yeah, yeah. He thought that was okay. He knew it was. He Teen Wolfed it.

That's a deep cut. Don't worry about Mitt Romney's dog. So he drove to the post office exactly what you think happened happened. And so he gets there and what do you know? There's no envelopes. And so my parents call me a little concerned about this. I think there were 70 some, I don't remember how many total, but fair amount, like a purple magenta color thing. So pretty bright, easy to spot. And so they driven out several times. I drove the route, you know, not that far the post office, nothing.

We contact my in-laws, my male in-laws, and tell them what happened and to be alert because I think there was something in the invitation itself that would link to like you could contact them. Yeah. That was where they're turned to or whatever. So it turns out that two guys, two different guys, Johnny and Scott never got their last names, had found the envelopes in different batches somewhere along the curb in the gutter. Johnny was, I remember him

being incredulous that nobody had stopped to pick them up because they obviously looked important. Yeah, people were driving over them. So I'd made two separate trips. They both lived within a mile or two of my parents house And so once I got the address from my mother-in-law Went over there and got him and we were able to salvage my mom and I were cross-referencing the list And you know make sure you got everybody covered. Yeah Right, and then there was only a handful that I mean to be honest I was not like, you know what? It's good enough. We can just blame it on the post office. You know, it's fine.

Like if it wasn't too terrible. You got all your vital guests covered. So we got it back. And I remember, you know, I went over, thanked them. I asked them like, you guys, well, do you want to come to the wedding? Do you want like a money as a reward kind of thing? And said, no. So they just gave me each, gave me a name of like a charity they like. I think I made a donation in their honor or something. And then, you know, we got the envelopes back. And then enough of them.

And then hand wrote, I think my mom hand wrote a few other ones and got the envelopes out. But it's just like a great dad story of like, that was his big piece for the wedding and I'll be honest like I don't know since there's always been a thing for my wife of like she loves my dad there's a trust deficit that will never fully heal I would say. You cannot trust that hapless fucker that's the basic truth. It's one thing to multitask and then leave something like that on the road.

It's still not okay. Absolutely. But to be, to have one job and to just get in your car and start driving and at no point think, what am I doing? Especially that job. That job's big. That job is a pretty big job. It's a big job.

Yeah, yeah. And then to just drive the whole way. I have terrible. Get to the post office. Yeah. Huh. Now wait, now wait a minute. What?

What's up with those? What was this whole task about? Maybe I already mailed them. That's the old fashioned way. Yeah. Yeah, so we're big into e-cards in our family now. Uh, like. Well, in many ways it might be the Lord's way

of calling the herd of those who should be invited and those who should be left off, I think. You do have the best excuse if someone wasn't invited to the wedding, which I'm a big cusper, so it's like I always get left off. That is the best excuse ever. Yeah, yeah. I don't know, we lost like three of them. Yeah, yeah, right, exactly.

It was nuts out there. It was like a- It was D-Day of wedding invitations out there. It was like, you know how they... I think it was Jim Baker, televangelist. They found bags of donation of mail just tossed in a ditch. Jesus. Fuck him.

You know? Yeah. He was good. Yeah, Yeah. My favorite part is that my wife was coming out, she was finishing up medical school at the time. Yeah. My fiance and so he's coming back.

She'd done like a mission trip in, I want to say South Africa. Yeah. That's where my dad's from. All of it. So she just, she landed like she was landing in a few hours or something and then got, I didn't heard the whole story, but fortunately, you know, didn't, had to miss or got to miss the hectic, like we don't know if he was winning in the game.

Yeah, yeah. She got the catch up. But still the stress of just knowing that that was out there, like that's, you know, that's exactly why, like I would say, cause like I said, my attention span is shit. But if I were in that position, I would realize the stakes involved

in terms of like, if you fuck this up, what that is gonna do to other people. And I don't even mean it in the sense of like, I'll get in trouble. I mean, like, people will be fucking flipped out. How did your dad manage all that? Did he seem super stressed? That would give me real adjuda.

Did he seem to sort of just be like, hey, whoops. I just realized he left in the middle of that call. Oh, Noah just left. He left. Oh, all right. Well, fine, Noah. Maybe his dad had him on the roof of his car. I don't know what the hell happened.

He just went right up the sun roof. Just how, it's how they do it. All right, well thank you for the call, Noah. He came back if you wanna say a proper goodbye. Yeah. Oh, okay. It would be nice. Noah, you there, Noah? Yeah, sorry.

Okay, that's all right. We just wanted to say goodbye. Yeah, we're very curious what happened, but we'll just go. No, it's fine, we're still married. But the, there was a, one of my favorite stories, Andy, about my dad is that we were in MoMA in 2001. And my mom was taken out because she'd seen

Yoko Ono. Oh, which was really exciting for her. And so she's really excited. We're leaving the museum. She's super excited. We go outside. My dad runs up. He's super excited. Noah, is that Conan O'Brien? And we look across the street and it's Conan O'Brien. I believe you've met the man. He's not like, he can't hide it. Yeah, no, he's a parade float. Right. Yeah. So I scamper, like John Stewart could probably hide within the New York population. I don't think Conan can. And so I'm, I walk quickly to catch up to Conan and turn and

go Conan, like really your fan girling out over him. And he looks at me, kind of gives me this like, I'm almost a foot shorter than I'm probably. And he looks down at me and then just turns away, picks up the pace and scurries into the subway never to be seen again. I like that too. My mom being super excited for Yoko Ono, my dad being super excited, like that's totally them. Right.

And I'm excited to see Conan. Still, I bet you Conan was warmer than Yoko. Yes, had to be. Had to be. Did you chase Yoko as well? I can't believe it happened to him. Yeah. Well, actually, you know, he actually is really good

about being noticed and people coming up to him and stuff. He's far better than I am. And I'm not even like rude or anything, but I'm certainly not like, he'll chew the fat with people. Oh, there are, some people are so good at being famous and you see it and you're like, wow, that is, I went on the road with David Kechner for a while

and I genuinely a few times saw people be like, well, I have to go. Yeah, yeah. And I'm like, well, I have to go. Yeah, yeah. I'm like, David, you're too good to these people. No, I've known Dave since like 1989. Yeah, he's good at it. He's, yeah, he's like. Very good.

Well, and his is a very Midwestern version, which is like to sit down at a table and just like turn to the next table. Well, where are you folks from? Yeah, he's running, he's got bits galore. Yeah, just loves it. Yeah, and genuinely people are like, holy shit, this is insane.

You're hurting my arm. That's my wife, don't kiss her. All right, Noah, thank you so much. Thanks, guys. Thank you. And Mazel Tov on the 11 years or whatever it was. Yeah, it's as long as the dollar. Oh no, I mean 15 years.

Oh, nevermind. A little more. Okay, bye. All right, 855-266-2604. We're talking dads. Dads if you're from Chicago. Steven, are you there, Steven? Steven.

Yes, hi, how are you? I'm good, I'm good, how are you? Good, good, thanks. Well, you know, my dad was not running drugs in some 1970s hippie cartel, but he did once throw a live turkey into his ex-wife's backyard. Oh! Is that some sort of... That's it.

That's the whole story. Oh! In some countries, that's a... Legal divorce. No, it's an attempt for reconciliation. I didn't realize that. I thought the other way. Yeah, I mean, that's not a bad thing.

Right. It is actually a nice gesture. Sure. I've been in some arguments. If a turkey was gifted, I could see myself dropping whatever was going on. If you're going to eat it, you do have to butcher it. I'd raise it. Would you?

I'd be raising it. Oh, that's nice. Yeah, I'd be raising it. They can be really mean, though. They can be nice, too. Well, if it was a turkey vulture, I'd probably try to get out of that one, because they're. That's unrelated. Unrelated, yeah.

No, if it was just a turkey, I mean, I'd at least give it a shot. All right. Maybe a couple weeks, seeing how we work as roomies. Any of Gareth's friends there out there, you know. Or exes. Yeah, or exes. And let's talk.

He's got a birthday coming up. Yep, always. Was that it? Did he go? Steven? That was it. What was his motivation? My mom. What was his motivation for? My mom didn't take it. Yeah.

Oh, it's your mom? You know, my dad was kind of an odd one. It's my mom, yeah. Oh, wow. How did it's your mom? Kind of an odd one. It's my mom, yeah. Oh, wow. How did he acquire the turkey? Okay, so I was very young and I've blocked out most of the childhood. So I have no idea how he got the turkey. My mom didn't appreciate it.

So it wasn't taken as you guys have kind of gracefully said that there should have been some type of reconciliation. But my mom- Well, she seems real uptight if you ask me. Yeah I get why he left. Yeah yeah. This is crazy. Can't roll with the turkeys. Good lord. I mean yeah chivalry is dead. But I think my mom just, to be quite honest I'm not a hundred percent on what happened to the turkey and this sounds really grim but I think my mom just ignored it and it died. See, Stephen, if in my family this was a story, the endless questions I would have,

and I would get closure, and look, if she didn't leave it for dead, it's awful, but I would know. I'd know where my dad got it. This could be, honestly, Netflix could get two docs out of this. So there's a lot here. You might want to dig a little further.

There's more meat on the bone. Pardon the pun. Oh, boy. I'm sorry, Andy. Oh, boy. Andy! It's all right. Thank you.

All right, yeah, well... This is the easiest story for my family. This is the one that I could actually say. Well, you did. This is the fun one that involves animal death through neglect. You did allude to the fun one that involves animal death through neglect. You did allude to the fact that your childhood's been blocked out. I think both of us comedically just sidestepped the land right there.

Right, right, exactly. Yeah. Yeah, I mean, we probably could make that funny, but we've only got like 25 minutes left. Yeah. All right, Stephen, thank you for the call. Thank you, Stephen. Thank you.

All right, bye-bye. All right, next up, Sean, calling from Massachusetts. Sean, are you for the call. Thank you, Stephen. Thank you. All right, bye-bye. All right, next up, Sean, calling from Massachusetts. Sean, are you there? You got Gareth, you got Andy. Hi, Andy. Hi, Gareth. How are you doing today? Good, thanks.

How are you? I'm doing good. So here's a story I want to tell you about. Two pieces of context. My father liked to play pranks, and my father had both a pacemaker and a defibrillator implanted in his chest, okay? That's a pretty cocky guy for having all that machinery in him.

It's Iron Man. Playing pranks. Playing pranks. When all a well-placed magnet could fuck him up pretty bad. He might have not even had that in there. It's the long con. It would be perfectly out there.

I didn't know you could get a defibrillator put inside of you. I guess. I always thought it was an external... I'm taking this guy's word for it. I'm taking Sean's word for it. I think he's pranking us. All right, Sean, sorry. So, okay, continue, continue.

You and your dad, Iron Man. Yes, yes. So, years ago, he passed away. And when somebody who has these devices in, when they pass away, somebody comes in and they got a little wand or whatever, they wave all of the device to shut it off. Okay? So this happened. And so, okay, so fast forward three days. I'm at the tailgate in the last fitting of my suit before the wake, which is in a few hours. And the funeral director calls me and I remember his name, but I remember he had a very strong Midwestern accent. And he said,

Oh, hi Sean. He's Mr. The funeral director. And I'm, yeah, everything's fine here except for a small snag. This is how it really happened before in my 30 years of doing this. I don't know how to say this. And I'm like, yeah, just, just spit it out. He says, okay, well, uh, dad, uh, yeah, well, uh, dad is, is beeping. And I just, I lost it because I knew exactly what had happened. And I left hysterically in the Taylor's shop and parents on my face. They're like, what's wrong? Like,

hysterically in the tailors shop and tears down my face. They're like, what's wrong? I'm like, my God, it's beeping. Like as I'm, hysterically, what happened? So the guy at the hospital turned off the placemaker, but he didn't know about the distributor, so he just didn't turn it off. And three days later, this is like the little, you know, the distributor that could like,

hey, something might be wrong with this guy. Could you, could you- Three days. Three seconds could you three days that's that's top technology well what happens well if your heart stops for three days it beeps oh that'll say my insurance covers that I guess I'll take it yeah they said don't get your health care at Walmart but they were wrong I do like having something inside of me that three days later gets to make a noise. Yeah, exactly.

You can go with many, like just even a catch phrase or just like, I'm, ow, ow, you know. Hey, let me out of here. I'm a little guy inside of the dead guy. Oh, wow. So what did you, did he just beep through the entire ceremony or service? There was apparently an emergency number for medical device people and they got somebody to come out and they turned that one off and so it was all set. But yeah, it was a short difficult time. I just, I very much enjoyed thinking my dad got to play, you know, a one

more prank on me. Yeah, yeah, no kidding. They kind of like helped me through the whole thing. God, good for him. What better thing to bring to awake than your father sounding like an alarm going off? Yeah, yeah. It really just...

Yeah, like a cassia wad. Yeah, it is awake. I mean, stay up. It actually, though, your story did answer the question for me, which was, why turn them off? Yeah. You know, like, who cares? Yeah, why? And also, if you're... Thump, thump, thump, go to town. for me which was why turn them off? Yeah. You know like who cares? Yeah.

And also- Thump, thump, thump, go to town. If you're the wand guy, come on, let's, you got a list of two things here. Let's get them both. You're making one trip, let's get them both. Yeah. That sounds like the wand one.

Yeah. So I guess that's why you have to turn them off because they'll beep. Yes, at three days later, you know, just for the week. Right, just to let you know you're dead. Yep, absolutely. Or where he's located. It's like when you lose keys.

Yeah, yeah. There's Dad. Oh, thanks, Dad. All right, Sean, thank you so much. Thank you very much. Uh-huh. All right, next. Am I going to mic or to Kate?

All right, Kate, Kate from Pennsylvania. Hello. Hello, Kate. How's the wind tunnel? Yes, I am driving. All right, that's okay. That's fine. Sorry, it's bad. So, I was calling to tell a story about my dad who is the smartest man I know. He's a retired doc. We used to have iguanas growing up. Oh wow Also, of course know that my parents do not swear. They're very Preserved people but I was coming home from school and I hear my dad yell fuck Go God something happened. I got stairs and I see blood everywhere Wanna have bit him when my dad went to

everywhere. The iguana had bit him when my dad went to feed him and iguanas have very sharp razor sharp teeth. They're supposed to unhinge their jaw when that happens. My dad did not know that. He ripped the iguanas off. Iguana ate his nose. And I... Ate your father's nose. ...went by the case, ate, you know, he had to get plastic surgery but like a good chunk of flesh came off. So when I went by the iguana I have this vision in my head, like before I saw my dad in the blood I was like the iguana's eating something and it was the nose. Wow. Wow. I mean, okay, did he keep the iguana? Yeah, we kept the iguana. I mean, I don't know, like, you know, we fed it at an arm's length from then on out.

Yeah. No more kissing the iguana. Or me, I would have gone straight in the microwave. That's it. I'll teach you. That's awkward. Oh my God. And your nose. Nose. It's a big player on the, it's it. It's the headliner.

The good news is, I mean, he was a retired doc. He had some nice plastic surgery friends. They did a great job. Really? Like you couldn't tell great job or? Yeah. Okay. And did his nose look, did it look the same?

He has like a curve in his nose, but his nose looks the same. It has like a fun like curve on it. See, I've never wanted any... If someone was describing my nose and the word fun was involved, I'm not loving the compliment I'm being tossed. It's a fun curve. He's got a fun curveball nose. It's fun. It's a twist.

You're not going to believe the ending. Oh. Well... Your father's still with us? Yes, he's still with us. Still have iguanas to any animals? No. He has some dogs. Dogs, rational.

They are much nicer. Yes, yes. Yeah, good. I'm going to say no to iguanas now. I'm still helping. For people that want to have them, you need to unhinge their jaw, very important. What does that mean? There's like a kill switch?

Like if you don't want a dog at something, you can tug. Like if a dog is holding something you're not supposed to, right? You sort of put your fingers in there at the back of their jaw. I need to get them to unlock. And your dad ripped the iguana off his nose, basically.

Just ripped it off, which I get, it's an automatic reaction. Yeah, yeah. Get this thing off. He panicked, he had an iguana on his nose. Yeah, yeah, you are pressed for time when you have a lizard clamped on your face. We can Monday morning quarterback it,

but until you're in that position, you don't know what you're gonna do. Until a dinosaur is hooked onto you. Exactly, high size 20-20. Sure, high nose. quarterback it but until you're in that position you don't know what you're gonna do. Until the dinosaurs hook down to you. High side 2020. Sure, high nose. Alright Kate, well thank you so much for the call. You're welcome for the visual.

Thank you. Okay, alright bye bye. 855-266-2604, we got time for a few more calls. We're talking dads today. Mike from Rhode Island. Are you there, Mike? Hey, good. Yes, I am. Good afternoon. Thanks for taking the call. Sure. You got me and Gareth. Hey Gareth. Andy, big fan. Thank you. That's tough.

Andy, it's like, why not? So you really like a long time. So it's a pleasure. Oh, thank you. And the other guy, sorry. No, I'll get there. Okay. Yeah. You know, Mike, it was, it was already difficult. Right, right. You could have just let get there. Okay. Yeah, yeah. You know, Mike, it was already difficult. Right, right. You could have just let it lie. Yeah, and then you pushed it right. Yeah, yeah. GarethReynolds.com.

Thank you. GarethReynolds.com. Now you got homework. Thank you. All right. Well, Mike, tell us your story about your dad. Let's just move on to your dad before Gareth kills himself. It's fine, Mike.

I'm fine. I got to tell you, just a quick sidebar before the dad story. I'm literally sitting in traffic in Providence and the guy told the story about the pacemaker defibrillator. Yeah. I worked with a guy from Providence, Rhode Island who actually had a pacemaker defibrillator from like a birth defect. And he was young and he had it. And we get together for a meeting and he was a day late to the meeting. So we come to the meeting and we're like, Hey, you know, where were you? And he's like, Oh, you know, doctor's appointment. And we're like, well, you know,

all day, doctor's appointment, whatever here with a pacemaker defibrillator, once a year he had to go to the hospital and they stopped his freaking heart to test the defibrillator. That's the good, God's honest truth. Once a year he'd have to go to the hospital and he'd be dead for a couple of seconds and then they kicked that thing on and it sure worked.

Wow. So things you don't know about pay to get to privilege. Yeah. But you're selling out my dad. Your side story's out of the way, yeah. Okay. Yeah. Now tell us about your dad. Passed away a couple years ago, worked for the phone company in New Jersey for 40 years.

Okay. And there was not a bar in North Jersey where he wasn't essentially normed at. So the family joke was every time we went anywhere, anywhere in the United States, my dad would inevitably meet someone that he knew. And he couldn't remember their name to save their life. So as a kid, I'd be like, Hey, dad, who was that? And he just made up this name. Oh, that's Charlie Smith. So after I realized, you know, 12 or 13 when I met 20 Charlie Smiths that my father had no idea, I don't remember her name, but it

was a big joke that everywhere we met, everywhere we went, he knew somebody. In the late 70s we took a vacation up to Nova Scotia and we were out in the Bay of Fundy. And for those of you that are not familiar with the Bay of Fundy, it's got the greatest tide change like in the world. It's like a 30 or 40 foot tide change. My father and I are low tide, Bay of Fundy, half a mile offshore, middle of nowhere of the world. And lo and behold, there's this guy snorkeling. Literally snorkels right into my father, gets up out of the water, pulls the mask

off, and says, holy shit, Johnny Beck! God's honest truth, middle of nowhere out in the world, and if I could drown myself in three feet of water at, you know, 13 years old, I certainly wouldn't have done it at that point. So that's my dad's story, and I miss him and he was a good man. I certainly wouldn't have done it at that point. So that's my dad's story. And I miss him and he was a good man. Oh, well that's sweet. Your dad's a legend. And now more people know about him

because he called in the show. And I'm glad that it was in Jersey because I saw that you're from Rhode Island and it said your dad, you know, the synopsis was that your dad knows everyone. I'm like, yeah, in Rhode Island, how hard is that? Yeah. So, it's not a real... Rhode Island's really like a county. It's not even a state.

Exactly. I do love it though. I really like it. I do too. I love Providence. It's a great, really cool town. It gets a bad rap, but I don't know why. Does it? Yeah, yeah. I like it. I like it a lot. It's the best eaten Italian city on the East Coast. Yeah, I agree. Period. End of story. All right, well, Mike, thanks for the call. All right, thanks for not being a fan of mine, Mike. We'll talk to you later, buddy.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Gareth Reynolds. No, I'm not. I'm not. Mike, it's too late. We gotta go. GarethReynolds.com. Thank you.

Here to help. Next we have. For Christ's sake. Thank you, Andy. Adam, Adam, are you there? Please be a fan of Gareth's. Just lie to me. Just tell him that you're a big fan. I've got eight podcasts. Huge fan.

He started another one while he was here. I love the idea of this show, I'm doing it. I'm doing the Andy Gareth show. I have a picture of him tattooed on my back. All right, that's nice. At least everyone tells you you did. Can I be honest? It's a little far. I just, can I get something?

No, you cannot. This is the Goldilocks. This is where you just should be quiet. It's a little much. Yes, of course it is, but you just don't tell him that. Give me someone who likes my stuff and shares it. See, they're all or nothing with these people. As someone who has, I have seen people have gotten tattoos of me.

It's not, it does not feel good. Well, have you ever had to sign someone for a tattoo? I've had that. Oh, and then they get it tattooed over it? Yeah, it's like the highest-stakes signature ever. And I'm like, that's not what it actually looks like. I'm like, oh, God. Poor guy. All right, Adam, right. Oh, God. Poor guy. All right, Adam.

Tell us. My dad, older guy, you know, grew up, born in the 40s. So of that generation where they're not really good at showing love, very... That's what he'll tell you. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. It's a generational issue. Right, right.

It's not my fault. It was the 40s. Get the fuck out of here. I'm not allowed to love you. Yeah, yeah, it's a generational. It's not my fault. It's the 40s. I get the fuck out of here I don't I'm not allowed to love you. Yeah. Yeah. Well, they're just expressing it. I understand. I know I mean we're having fun here That's the idea. So a few years back. I was Kidney stone that was infected and I had to be rushed into surgery because of, you know, sepsis and all that. Sure. And so I called my folks to let them know that, hey, I'm going in for surgery. And my mom is freaking out. She's like, that's sepsis. You could die.

Like, this is very serious. You need to take this seriously. And in the background, I can hear my dad like, can I speak with them? Can I speak with them? And my mom's going, your cousin had her leg amputated because of it. Thank you mom. And finally she's like, here, your dad wants to talk to you. My dad gets on the phone and goes, you see the bears game last night? Wow. And my mom, I can hear my mom freaking out. But that's how he showed love.

Right, right. He's like, hey, here's this thing I enjoy. Yeah, but honestly- I know we talk about it all the time. Right, honestly, who's more helpful to you in that moment? Yeah. Your mom telling you what you already know or him- Dad shaking the keys.

Saying like, yeah, things, yeah, exactly. Things are gonna keep going. Look over here. We're still gonna keep up our relationship of small talk. You want a combination. What is it? Look, here's what's gonna happen and it's gonna be okay. Yeah.

Was this your card? Yeah. And you were okay after the kidney stone? Yeah, you obviously. You didn't get sepsis? I mean, we're assuming. Yeah, yeah. Oh, yeah. Okay. Had you seen the Bears game? I mean, we're assuming. Yeah, yeah, oh yeah. Okay. Had you seen the Bears game?

I did actually see the game. Okay, so? So it was a double thing. I couldn't talk about it because they're like, get off the phone, we're gonna need to get you into surgery. Yeah, yeah. Wow.

Wait, I simply must talk about... We need a QB. Yeah, yeah. I must complain about the bears, because that's all you can do, apparently. I agree. All right, Adam. Well, thank you for the call. Thank you for letting me speak.

No trouble. Thanks for the back tattoo, buddy. Love you guys. Love you. Oh, yeah. All right. OK, can I ask a question about tattoos? Yes, of course you can.

So do you get upset if you see someone who has a tattoo and it looks nothing like you? Like when they say, oh, I got a tattoo of you? No, actually, I think that might make it easier. It's just when somebody puts a tattoo of your face on them, it's not a rational act. And I think that they've invested too much in me. Hard to react to.

Yeah. I mean, of course in a sense, it's flattering. It is like an expression of admiration, but. At least they're not getting it lasered. That would be hang around. I bet you probably most of them have gotten lasered. No, no. Yeah, or just transition into some kind of floral design.

This used to be Andy Richter, now it's a Daisy. Yeah, now it's an oak leaf. Now it's Santa Claus. All right, Adam, thank you so much. Thank you. All righty. All right, we got time for so much. Thank you. All righty. All right, we got time for one more, yeah? Okay, we're talking to Andy, Andy to Andy.

Hello? Hello, how are you? I'm good, Andy, you got Andy and Gareth here. How are you? I don't have a tattoo of your face, but I do have Andy Richter controls the universe on DVD. Oh, okay, see, that's fine. That's great. That'll do.

Entirely appropriate. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. But I feel like if I ever did get a tattoo of your face, I would be one of the people who got it lasered. Yeah, for sure. Yeah, absolutely. I mean, I'm not, listen, I'm not that hot on me these days.

Stop it. No, I used to be great. Oh stop it, Andy. I used to be at the top of my game. You still are. Oh, okay. Come on. All right, well tell us your dad's story here.

Yeah, so my story is there's a bit of a tradition, starting with my father's father, of having some wise words to pass on. The two phrases that my grandfather was known for that I remember because I've heard that there were a bunch of them. But many are called few get up and my personal favorite is at first you don't succeed My personal favorite, if at first you don't succeed, try the outfield. Hmm. Hmm. That's a nice adage. That's pretty good.

So when I was a senior in high school, I did some dumb shit and I got a Saturday detention for it. Okay. And the letter came from the school. My father was the one who was opening the mail that day, calls me into the den either by my name or some derogatory expression, which was still common from him as a matter of fact. Yeah, exactly.

Yeah. Like, hey, asshole, get in here. Right. And I poke my head in and I say, yeah. And he like waves the letter at me informing him of my Saturday detention. And he says, don't be a jerk off your whole life. And I laugh in his face and I say okay and I leave and it turned out to be really good advice.

It took me about another decade for me to actually take him up on that advice. Right, right. Well, you spent a little time as a jerk off. Yeah, I mean, do you know any teenage, early 20 males who aren't just a little bit of a jerk off. Yeah. I mean, do you know any, you know, teenage, early 20 males who aren't, you know, just a little bit of a jerk off? Yeah. If you're going to be a jerk off, your youth is the time.

Get it out of your system. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Well, young and jerk off, that's cute. Yeah. Yeah, right. You're a bad boy. Yeah. And you're 30s and you're still a jerk off. Asshole. Not cute at all. No, that's not cute at all. Or it's time to. Yeah, and you're 30s and you're still a jerk off. Asshole. Not cute at all. No, that's not cute at all.

Or that's, now it's time to get a job and pay some fucking bills. Absolutely, yeah. Absolutely. Well, you're not, I think I speak for both of us when I say you're not a jerk off. No. So you're great. You seem great. As far as I can tell. I used to be.

You got it together enough to call into a radio show. Yeah. Yeah. That's true. And I did after work, as a matter of fact. Oh. I waited until I was, I was clocked out from my job. Oh, that's good.

Wow. So, making dad proud. Yeah. That's great. Good for you. All right, Andy, thank you so much for the call. Thanks for having me, guys. Have a great rest of your day. Okay, thank you.

See ya. Well, that's our show. Let me tell you one quick one from my dad. Of course. Very quick. That just reminded me of one where my school said every day you have to come home and read for an hour. Uh-huh. And my dad was going off the microwave clock before we had phones and all that stuff. Right. And like a day into it I realized I could just set the microwave an hour ahead and not do anything.

So when he came in I'd be like, well it's over. Yeah, yeah. I already did my reading. Yeah, he would look at the clock and be like, oh, okay. And I'd just be like, just 630 to 730. It'd be boom, done. All right, next. There's like three days he was like, wait a minute. Well, would you then set it back to the real time? Yeah, eventually. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, and I was probably putting him in. He probably thought he was having some sort of dementia problem.

I really am losing track of time. Yeah, but for like three nights at work, then I got caught. But no, it's been a pleasure. Thank some sort of dementia problem. I really am losing track of time. Yeah, but for like three nights at work that I got caught. But no, it's been a pleasure. Thank you for having me on, Andy. Thank you for coming in, Gareth. We usually pick the favorite.

I mean, we're not gonna do better than murder. I'm gonna go iguananos. Oh, all right. That to me is- We are gonna do better than murder. Well, it's when you get the syphilis look from a lizard that you're domesticating, I don't know. The murder one was a, we started with the main course.

We really did. Yeah, they brought out the flank. Yeah. It was a grabber, as they say in speech writing class. And he really didn't, there wasn't much to it other than three murders had occurred around his father and that was it. And then again too, like an incredible lack of follow through.

Yeah. Like follow up I should say. Yeah. Like I just don't understand how you can't. If my dad was involved in a murder. Yeah. First thing I would do is know everything. Second thing I would do is not call a show.

Yeah. That would be the end of everything. I'd be like, no, they're going to trace it. At least I know about it. Yeah. Yeah. That would be the end of ever. I'd be like, no, they're going to trace it. At least I know about it. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. But no, I mean, actually there was, I had to do, there's a story that I could have told that reminded me, somebody's story reminded me of that I can't tell on the air.

See? That's how they're supposed to be that. And I was about to, and I was like, maybe I should, no. You got the brain bouncer. Smart. Yeah, I can't do that. You got the brain bouncer, smart. That guy didn't have that. He sure didn't. That guy was sitting on hold the long,

he was like, all right, I'm gonna jump out of the gate and just, and wow, three murders. This might be like, someone might have a cork board with yarn right now and be like, wait a minute, CM. Hold on a minute. Hold on a minute. Volkswagen van, I know that guy. Gareth, again, his podcast, Here to Help, The Dollop,

Next We Have with Gareth Reynolds. Yep. GarethReynolds.com for standup dates. Does your dad have anything he wants to plug? No, no, he's got some sketchers slip-ins he's excited about. Oh, nice. Or he's placating me. Nice.

All right, thanks for tuning in everybody. Stick around for Laurie Kilmartin's stand up on Conan and I'll be back next week with more of this. Am I back next week? No. Oh okay. This is enough. I don't know how it went.

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