The Three Questions with Andy Richter - Joel McHale

Episode Date: August 12, 2025

Actor and comedian Joel McHale joins Andy Richter to discuss gifting Jimmy Kimmel a katana for his birthday, getting his start on the same TV show as Bill Nye the Science Guy, giving away too much money on a game show, getting older, and much more.Do you want to talk to Andy live on SiriusXM’s Conan O’Brien Radio? Tell us your favorite dinner party story (about anything!) - leave a voicemail at 855-266-2604 or fill out our Google Form at BIT.LY/CALLANDYRICHTER. Listen to "The Andy Richter Call-In Show" every Wednesday at 1pm Pacific on SiriusXM's Conan O'Brien Channel.

Hi there. Welcome back to the three questions. I'm your host, Andy Richter, and today I'm talking to actor, comedian, game show host, and my pal, Joel McHale. You've seen Joel in a million things because he's very needy. He cannot stay away from cameras. You've seen him in Ted. You've seen him in blended. The informant, of course, TV shows like the soup, community, and animal control. He's set to appear in Scream 7, which comes out next year, and his show Animal Control just got picked up for a fourth season. And on, On top of all that, he hosts the new Fox Game Show, The 1% Club. Now, please enjoy my lovely conversation with the very lovely Joel McHale. Why? Well, COVID, I'm COVID positive. I've got the new coach. He loves COVID. Yeah.

I was just telling, Sean, I saw a statistic. 40% of Republicans think that the COVID vaccine is possibly or definitely, or probably or definitely more deadly than the COVID virus. Hey, if you're just tuning in, welcome to conspiracy. Is that true? That's, I, where did you read that? I read it on blue sky. It was a, it was a survey from, I think, one of those. of liberal social sites.

Oh, no. I set this off on the wrong note. Are we wrong, Joe? Okay, good. I don't doubt what you're saying. And, you know, there's just sometimes when you hear stuff like that,

if that's true, then it's just fucking lunacy. And so fucking stupid. I just, I really do think there's a call going on. I think somehow just in our collective brains, we know there's too many people. So we decided,

in our collective lizard brain look some of us got to go so let's believe stupid shit that kills people but that has always you think it's because no I mean I don't really know that they were being overpopulated and there needs to be a way to I don't know I don't think I don't know

it well it's kind of you know it's like the idiocracy you know that sort of thing that idiocry poses yeah that it's sort of like the planet and, you know, the sort of just general sort of interaction of human collective consciousness. And the planet was like, uh, we're getting too big for our britches. So we have to. Yeah, when we were all stupid, we didn't have the ability to ruin the planet.

Although they kind of did in the movie. I think people have just always been stupid. Yeah. And super smart. Right. And then a few of them get lucky. And they go, we invented the fucking wheel. Right.

Or like a pump that goes in a rig. This is going to help the spool, make us a wool blanket out of this water power. Right, right. But most of the time, everyone's just dumb. Right. And then you go back. Remember in the 80s was all, we just thought it was all these kids and pets are being taken by devil worshippers. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

That was a whole thing, guys. That was fun, though. You guys weren't born until early odds. Also the one that was fun, too, is I believe it was in 2016. in the first Trump election, there were like evil clowns and coming out of the woods? Yeah.

Like, remember that? Oh, that was exciting. I wanted that to be true so bad. Was it the Onion who, in their Our Dumb Century book, the headline was, Elvis is dead? And then the article below it, is Elvis alive? And that, I was like, that's perfect. Yeah, yeah.

It was like, it doesn't matter. It's just immediately, oh, he must be alive. Yeah. Okay. Great. Great. We're all fucked. All right.

the things that I believe, and then I get scared. Because I'm like, what are the things that I believe that are completely wacky? Oh, I'm right about everything. Yes. Yeah, yeah. You just got. I agree. You've never been wrong.

I've never been wrong. This shirt wasn't a mistake. No, not at all. No. You know, maybe the breakfast. I mean, who puts it in a dryer on high, you? And actually, that's my wife. I've told her many times, please.

Oh, so your wife does your laundry? Yeah. I do the cooking and the dish. dishes. She does the laundry. Uh-huh. And I, and I'm fine with that. You do the dish. By you throw away the, the, the, no, no, no, no, no, no. No, that's not true at all. I cook almost almost every meal. Look, I believe you and I was just doing a bit about your shirt. I know, I know. Well, listen, speaking of bits, I want to blow the lid off your whole thing. Yes. Because this is something I was thinking about today. Mm-hmm. Flashback a few years ago, I don't know how many.

Let's say 60. 68. I was two years old. No, Jimmy Kimmel had a small birthday gathering at his home, to which you and I were both in attendance. And you gave him as a gift a katana, which to people who aren't as well versed in the way of Bushido as we are, a samurai sword. Yeah, yeah. And not just like, because, you know, I'm, you know, you see in the mall, there's samurai swords and, but they're all kind of fake.

They're not, this was like razor fucking sharp. This is a real katana. Cold steel. It's a great company. And I held it and it was terrifying. Yeah. It was absolutely terrifying, just illusion of like, oh my God, swinging this at people, like what that must be like.

Yeah. You'd kill them. Yeah. And then you, I believe like you were like tossing cardboard boxes and hacking at it. and making everyone nervous. Yeah, really. I think just classic McHaleism. It was not, it wasn't safe.

No, it was not. And that I probably had a few drinks. To give it to a man who has small children. Yeah. A house full of small children. Here is a four foot long razor blade. And it's how people used to really get things done. Right.

Oh, yeah, absolutely. And, yeah. If a peasant annoyed you, You could just lop his head off. Yeah, and, you know, when you're fighting with a sword or a knife, guys, every offense or every defense is an offense. Oh. If you're just swing, you don't even need to be good at it, but if you're like, eh. Right, right, right.

Anything that just barely touches that. You're the person attacking you. Yeah, they are going to be bleeding or hurt badly. That's why I was like, up close in your house, I'd rather have a big knife than a gun. Oh. Because, you know, those bullets are flying everywhere. Yeah, yeah. don't know what they're going to hit and they go through the wall yeah you're nervous so i at a

birthday party like that because as you know i've got like on conan i've been to several his birthdays yes and i've just i'm running out of ideas of weapons to give now here i'll say this again so we're at conan's party and and this time i look like a fucking genius but i it was from you it was a box and just something about the shape of it and the weight of it i was like it's a crossbow yes it was a crossbow this was not from your old shoppy no yes it looked like a really nice crossbow and I actually kind of was like I would like to take a shot at that crossbow it's pretty I have the same one yeah yeah it's nice but again and then you feel like you know it's the 1600s and you walk around yeah you get one shot and then it takes forever to sure that's a that's a great cover story but what I'm getting at is And I don't know, I haven't been to other late night talk show hosts birthday parties to which you've brought gifts. It seems like you're trying to kill late night hosts to free up spaces for you to get back into that game. Well, you've seen what's happened to the late night, you know, landscape.

Oh, it's a, it's a bloodbath. I killed Craig Kilbourne years ago. You did? Yeah. How? Well, I gave, it's not like I killed him on purpose. I gave him the means. Yes.

Yeah, it was... So what are you, like, giving Seth Myers, you know, like little bottles of nitroglycerin? Yeah, but he's built up a tolerance. So nitroglycerin? Yeah. If just a little bit every day, you'd be surprised. But I just meant it as an explosive. I keep trying to shake them. And every time I see him, I'm like, oh, it's so good to see you.

Come on. Colbert gets a landmine in the mail. There's another one. I gave him a, like a, like, you know, a Lansing spear. to have a, yeah. Did you really? No, I haven't. I haven't seen a long time.

I would not be surprised. I also get like when, often when people move to L.A., I will give them a hunting knife. Go like, keep this under your bed. It's the best defense that you're going to have. You don't want a baseball bat. Right. That's just blunt. And you're going to swing once with that thing.

And then that person can step in and then they've, they've sucked up all that room. So then you're not going to get another swing. But if you have a hunting knife, you just fill that thing all over the place. Now, how much of this is real and how much of it is bit? Well, my whole life has blurred into the brackish waters of real and bit. Yeah, I know. I know. But I mean, but you ought to be able to have some sense of...

I have a full katana under my bed. Yeah. I've got a couple of automatic knives in my drawers. What does that mean? They shoot out the front with a button. They're spring loaded and they can go either way. Like a very much a phallic. symbol.

I mean, all knives, right? But like the, you know, it's the classic thing. A little bit when it comes out. Yeah, yeah. Sometimes it doesn't want to come out. The flick knife, the killer sees his victim and then schlink. Yes, but everyone thinks you can put it against your skin and open it. That doesn't work.

No. It's not a, so I really do like knives and I've always loved them. And since a child, I would hang them on my wall. I love them. And so I have like brass knuckles and. All that. I don't know why. Are you a fighter? No, I never fought. I mean, I played a lot of sports where you ran into people, but I was never, I never became, I never was a boxer and MMN fighter.

But I mean, have you ever been in a physical fight in your life? Yeah. Yeah, yeah. A number of times, but in, not in, I mean, that was all grade school and some high school. And then when playing football, there's always skirmishes, but not like I've never been, not in any real. recent way. I think I threatened a person years ago in Seattle when we were playing co-ed

softball and he ran full speed into our second base person and really hurt her because he was supposed to slide and it was just a pickup game and the rage filled my eyes and I ran out and got into his face and said I have a katana under my bed

and then I pulled them out I kept him on my back and like this and I want to pick one of those and then I was like who's next the prophecy must be fulfilled. And so, no, I don't, I'm not a, yes, I would be good if I just had two knives. If anybody, like when it was a kick your ass, I'm like, great, if I can just have a knife. Do you practice knife fighting?

No, I did for a movie, which was really fun. Oh, yeah. Because the director kind of knew how much I liked knives and that he wrote this. Thank you, Scott Derrickson. And shout out, Scott Derrickson, delivers from evil. Did you see it? Don't lie. No.

Nope. Okay. No. And it, so I got to do that, but I wasn't like, so I just collect them. I just like, I have, as soon as I was able to afford things. Yeah, yeah. I started hoarding things that I liked like wine. Yeah. And I at one point was hoarding, you know those pencils from the 70s that had your favorite sports teams on the side, which is like Indianapolis cults? I began buying collections of those. And then I'm like, now I just got a thousand fucking pencils. And, uh, But it's okay, it's, it's for your kids to deal with. Yeah, no, I know. It's like that it'll all leave once you're dead and then it'll just be. It'll be this piles of stuff. Like when my, when my mom and dad finally cleaned out my mother-in-laws, or not my mother-in-laws, my father's mother-in-law, my grandmother's house, there was just tons of, yeah, I don't, I don't, I don't, I have a fantasy that I'll be

rid of everything the day I die and I'll spend my last dollar. Yeah? No. Probably not. Can't you tell my loves to grow? Do you have a lot of stuff? I used to have more, and as I've gotten older, but also, too, it's like I got divorced, so there was a lot, you know, there was a lot of stuff left behind, yeah, and then sort of

starting from scratch. And then when my current wife and I moved in together, there was, you know, we were dealt, we're both grown up. She's, you know, she's 49. I'm 58. We had a all kind, you know, we had all the gear. So it was like two waffle irons, two coffee, you know, like we had two of everything. Did the back of your brain go, and we need two waffle irons? No, no, no, no, no. But we did. Have you made waffles? with that waffle iron in the last since you've been married yes you have yeah yeah all right yeah absolutely um and i i don't even know what happened to her waffle iron she has a bunch of her stuff in our basement in in in in you know anal retentively marked bins uh that are you know cataloged yeah and then we just carry those bins around we do we do when at backstage of the you know when we did

comic on they would uh each you know each show that we would do we'd do four shows and they'd have a different fun co pop doll of conan yeah as like batman or you know uh freddy kruger or whatever and when we would have pallets of them backstage like because we wouldn't give them away and then they just bring them back and they would be backstage on pallets and i would always just say like you know, this is future generations hassle. Like, this is the problem of your descendants. And I just feel like, they're going to be so many. Sorry, Funco Pop dolls.

There are going to be so many of them. But you could make the same argument about Herod. Like King Herod had how many palaces? Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's great that they were all made of stone and marble. Right, right. I was like, oh, this guy had a bunch of shit. But you can't do more with a palace than you can't.

Same thing. Like, remember when you were, I don't know. You're younger than me, but like beer can. I'm 53. Beer can. Yeah, but still, that's, well, beer can collections. Yeah. Do you remember people collecting beer cans?

Yeah. And they're being like magazines about the value of old beer cans at the grocery store. It's insane. And I don't think anybody does that anymore. I would agree. Because we've become more evolved. Yes. They're like, we don't just have to have empty cans.

Yes. We can have dolls. Right. We have phones now. Yeah. Do you have any Funkal Pop dolls of yourself? I have one, but they were a fan-made it. I can't remember if there's two or one. But it was, which is very, very sweet and very kind and a lot of work for somebody to do.

And it was like a fan that, like, here's one for you, you know. And I have it. And it's beautiful. But it's like, but that's like at least a one-off work of art that somebody did just because I'm so profoundly important to the culture. Wait, go ahead. Wait, that's it? Yeah, yeah. Just I'm profoundly important to the culture.

I think you are. Thank you. I remember you mentioned Doseckis on the old old show, and it was Dosekis began sending beer for the 1230 show to NBC. And I remember thinking, that was the 90s. Yeah. And I remember thinking sitting at my parents' home going like, oh, that's what you do. Yeah, yeah. You just mentioned some products.

It, yeah, it doesn't, they start sending it. It doesn't necessarily work out, like, for the best. Like, well, Conan mentions, you got a lot of dos Ackis, though. Wasn't there something here recently that he got a bunch of, there was like a shitload of some food product. I don't know, maybe six months ago. But Conan will talk about things, and it'll all of a sudden there'll just be like a palettes. Cat, cat and crunch, I think. In fact, it was cat and crunch.

Yeah, yeah. And that was actually, that was a good one. That was pretty good. Because, you know, it's like as a grown man who does not need to eat sugary cereal, it's like, well, I'm not buying it. It's right here. It's a waste. There's a lot of it here. Yeah.

Somebody's got to take this. Okay. So I wish my grandfather's like collected Lamborghinis or something. I know. I know. No, nothing, nothing good. And then, and it really is because I've had relative. like an aunt and uncle that lived here that passed away and it's it's just like it well it's a bummer

dying is a bummer folks newsflash well but then also too just like at the end of a life there's just all this stuff and it's just like what it what does it all mean Joel I don't know yeah this is a real chipper interview well I guess the was it the uh the the Mnohans is that right the menoans I think so they would just dig a hole and like we put the king down at the bottom and then we just fill it up with jewels and stuff and we go and we bury it and you're like yeah all right we did it like like live horses and their carriages and then their wives would jump in and they're like all right end there you go yeah they're worth it yeah I don't know how are you these days all right are you all right are you at a good spot in your life yeah you know

because your boys are older they're 20 and 17 yeah yeah and uh and uh Yeah, I mean, it's not like, it's just not like the, well, they're almost out of the house, huh? And I'm like, maybe. Yeah, yeah. I don't think so. Yeah, no, I know. It's a different world for that thing. Not the, and as if the goal was finally, I know, I know, pushed them out.

I know, I know, I know. It is a weird thing because there are people who even, like today, because my 24-year-old son lives with us. And I don't, it doesn't see, it's not like a permanent sort of thing, but it's like, you know, okay. to save some money, live in our, you know, in our spare room. But there are people, like the randos, like the fucking cashier at the grocery store. You know, I don't know how he came up. I mentioned my 24-year-old lives with me. I think it was buying something he was going to use.

And he's like, he's got a job? How long as you plan on living with you? It's just like, you're a fucking cashier at the grocery store. Take easy, buddy. sound like my parents. Yeah. And I was, and then I just know other people that have been like, no, you, you got to set a time limit. Like, you got to be out of here by certain time.

And I mean, I understand. I don't think I've done a very good job. Oh, he just spilled. I got to go all of himself. Fine, I'm fine. I don't, I don't think I've done a great job of like making my kids, you know, have that sort of self-sufficient. kind of you know i i had jobs since i was 13 paper routes and then the grocery store and you know and and my kids just didn't do that like i you know but i kind of had to it's the difference of

having money and not having money yeah and and so i do feel like my kids are i know you know like they're not as they're not as equipped with just sort of basic survival skills as i was at they're you know yeah at the same age as that as they are but i also feel like what's the big fucking deal like i like my kid i don't mind that he lives with me and i don't i mean and also it's like i don't think that like 200 years ago there was a lot of when you get 18 you get out of here it's like no you stay here and work you like you chip in this we bought this farm and we had you right to be here right to work we made a bunch of you for labor you know.

And then they're like, I think I'm going to go be a graphic designer. Okay. Great. Great. Anyway, why don't you go back out

and fix that fence because it broke again? Yeah. Yeah, no, I'm, I'm same way. I, yeah, I'm kind of like, I like having them around.

Yeah, yeah. I love it when they give me a hug. And then I... On my birthday. Yeah, and then I spend the rest of the time hugging the dogs. And then Sarah will hug me

almost every day. So I'll be like, this is going great. Sarah's my wife, everyone. Yes, yes. Not an imaginary character that floats behind me. Yes. And you guys have been together. You've been married?

Like, it'll be, let's see, we got married in 96. Wow. So we will be married 29 years. Wow. Congratulations. 32. Wow. Nice.

Yeah, no, it's, we look at each other and go like, what happened? Yeah, yeah. It's weird because we moved away from Seattle 25 years ago. and I still get to Seattle Times, and it'll say, oh, this great restaurant's closing after 20 years. It opened up five years after I left. Yeah, yeah. It opened up half a decade after I left.

I know. Yeah, that's, I don't know. I think it's the plight of every person that ages where I'm like, oh, this, I'll never stop being surprised by that. Yes, yes. Or when people, I mean, I'm more used to it now, but when people are like, I watched you when I, since I was in great,

school. Yeah. And it's like a fully functioning adult with children of their own. Yeah, they're in there. Like, they're deep in their 30s. Yeah, yeah. Like, oh, boy, I am. I've been around a while. I watched, yeah, that was me. Yeah, yeah. I think when'd you go on the air? 93. Yeah. Yeah. I started watching the first week. Yeah. Look at that. Yeah. So you're as old, your career is as old as my relationship with Sarah. Yeah. Oh, coincidence? I don't think so. Now, are you well? How are you? I'm good. I'm good. Yeah, yeah. I mean, it's just, it's a very weird time on all fronts. Agreed. But I am happy, relatively healthy. I've got some bolting discs in my back that have a pinch nerve that's fucking with my leg.

What's the level of pain you're in all the time? It's totally what's the fun part is, it changes all the time. Oh. where I'll be in the car and then I'll get out and it's like, oh, I'm in intense pain right now. And then 10 minutes later, it's fine. And then it'll be like, oh, today it's numbness. And then tomorrow it's like, oh, no, it's shooting pain. And then the next day it's-

It's like a restaurant that's changing their menu all the time. Absolutely. And so there's no, I mean, I have some sort of like physical therapy things, but I really do think I'm going to need to get some. The next step is there's an outpatient surgery where they just basically carve out the hole in the spine that the nerve goes through. Good God. So it doesn't get pinched. Any physical problems for you guys? Joe, you're all right?

See, she has back pain. That's... Thank you, Joe. Thank you for your pain. Lower back pain? Upper back pain. Tension? yeah yeah it's not an injury all right yeah i like to think because when i have an injury or like i'm in pain

i'm like this is like an athlete they all they go through this all the time very much like an yeah yeah yeah yeah i mean they have to deal with this all the time yeah yeah so yeah when i i you know i worked out with a trainer for many years and i would find and then they like when i stopped working on with the trainer. I was like, I'm not in pain nearly as much as I used to be when I was like tearing down muscle to rebuild it. I was like, that's like. Yeah. I get it. I was, you know, and I was in better shape then and I was stronger then, but I still was kind of like, I am saying, I am paying someone to make me feel pain, you know, the next day of a hard workout and being like, oh, I can barely move. Two days after that, you're like, oh, no. No.

No. No. See, I never. Do you think there's a trainer who could help with your back? No, probably like a physical therapist, I would think. I know, but some trainers, it's like if we just build up the muscles around this. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, definitely. There's like, but, but I, I mean, I have those exercises and I do those exercises and I don't necessarily, I'm trying that, you know, because I went to a very good physical therapist. I have a very good physical therapist who said, here's what you need. Just do these. You don't. need to come in here and have me watch you do these. Right. And then you were like, great, now I'm not going to do them. Right. Exactly. I would rather... I mean, I will. No, I mean, I do do them, but of course not nearly as much. Do you want to do them now? No. I'll do

them right now. I don't. I'd like to learn. I'll show them to you afterwards. I do a lot of deadlifting, and that's changed my life. In what way? Because I used to have a lot of lower back pain. Yeah. Like back in the early odds. Yeah. My back. would go out and then I'd just be lying on the ground yeah and be like who am i'm in my mid 30s and i can't stand up and uh what's going on and uh and then this trainer named alley grits yeah in new york she was just like i'm gonna fix your back and then i started just working on lower back muscles deadlifts and changed everything and just they're just stronger and because i started building up those muscles that she was like all these muscles are weak so all the other

muscles when something bad happens that the weak ones are the ones that get abused yeah yeah it makes sense and then like a week later or 10 days later after doing it every day i was like oh i feel like i can go i can skip yeah and i've not i've not stopped since i've got i've had other ailments yeah yeah like uh what do you call it polio i had that for a while that was bad i did feline leukemia when you pulled up in that iron lung I was really GMC iron lock guys It's nice

It's really nice It's the AT4X It's great Anyway, yes So that's my story Yeah Yeah

Can't you tell my loves Who's the most famous guests you've had on Macy's Who's the most famous guest I've had on Yeah yeah It's good Rachel Maddow's pretty I would say a pretty big one

Was she cool? She's great Yeah yeah she's been on a couple times Stanford graduate Not dumb No no she's very smart Yeah funny And you gotta like to do what she does Every day

All those words Break it down All those words Yeah I have anxiety When I watch any newscaster I know Here we go Look at this teleprompter

They're just reading the way And they're making points. It sounds like we're having a conversation with them and they're making really good. But see, her even more, I feel like she writes most of that stuff. Yeah. You know.

Although she does do a thing that Andy Kindler, the comedian Andy Kindler, once, I believe it was a tweet, said sometimes Rachel Maddow gives out information as if she doesn't think you've ever heard information before. Because she will constantly, like, circle back and summarize what she's already said, which I think is helpful, but also I think

sometimes is just a time stretch. You think? Yeah, I think so. Well, I think it also be the producers are like, look, when you bring up, I don't know, when you bring up the bond, like the bond market and how it works. Yeah, yeah. We need a reminder. Yeah, you need, most people are like bonds, the candy.

And so they, I think, I'm guessing you have to start, like, it's now a name drop again, guys. I did a TV show of Stephen Frye. Yeah. Thank you. And his brain is enormous. Yeah, yeah. And I'm like, no, Stephen, we have to go back a number of steps on what you're talking about right now because I don't understand. I don't understand that thing here.

Yeah. So, but, but then again, could be a time stretch. Yeah. I don't know. She does it once a week now, right? I think so. Yeah, she's back to once a week. It's, that grind would have been, yeah.

Think about, like, this is hard for us to even find a time to do this, and she did it every day. Yeah. Wrote it all out. Yeah. And we're just bullshitting. We're fucking around. I don't know if people can tell. These young people have to sit and go, we're aging.

Yes. We're the ones who are growing old. Yeah, they're the ones that feel their life is slipping away. I want to know. You're from the Pacific Northwest, which is like true crime central. Have you ever noticed that? Like almost all true crime stuff is like in the Pacific Northwest, the tiny woods of, you know, Methville. Yeah.

But you're from there. Yeah. And now you live here. For years. Yeah. And you're, but you're also, I mean, you do a lot of different stuff. You have like. I never disagree.

I just want, I just want to do it. Yeah. But you have a really nicely varied career, which I relate to because, like, you do things like, you know, like you act, but you also host and you also, and like game show host. And that's kind of this. I'm in sort of the same thing where I'm glad that I can do these different things, not just because of like the sort of nuts and bolts about like, well, you've got to diversify because it's more fun. And I have a very short attention span. Yeah. Yeah. And I'm wondering if like as a kid is this, did you see yourself being here doing this kind of stuff? I, when I was a kid, I always wanted to do this. I always wanted to be on stage.

Yeah. And that's what I always wanted. And then. Even from a little. A. Yeah. Does that come from a specific place or was it just a general sort of? I think I saw 70. What is that? The music man. Yeah. In New Jersey. at the high school. Yep. And I remember when that 76 trombones thing was going at the end and then everybody stood up

and I couldn't see anything and I was like, this seems pretty fun. This is the life for me. What are we all doing here? And I did a play which my parents were like, you seem so happy

for the first time. And the play was, what are you asking that for? The Lady from the Sea by Ibsen. Look it up. No, it was the, because I have it, Wikipedia.

guys i know that's what you got up there uh no it was a stage version of it's a small world the ride from disney oh wow and uh it's uh was uh so the indoctrination had started right and this is a public school so anyway i played all the parts uh because i auditioned uh to be a snake and it's a small world yeah i came out of a basket and then i played a monkey who peeled a banana uh mine was peeling a banana Were there other children playing human parts? There was one playing Stalin. He was incredible. Just a lot.

It's a small world. Yeah, what are you going to do? It's even smaller now that you're going to be executed. It's so that I knew I wanted to do it. I was always held back because I was so bad at school and in the back of my mind that I was like, oh, that's kind of what I want to do. Because I couldn't read. Were you a dyslexic? Yes, Barry, to this day, ask anyone.

Like, what does that say? Yellow? Something. Yeah, yellow tape. Yeah, but now it just goes off into something else. And so it, yes, so what I'm saying is, it's what I wanted to do. And in seventh grade, it's kind of was like, I'm going to do this. And then I was in plays, and I loved it, and I was terrible.

And I just thought, I'm going to try to do this until the real job police take me away. But then I was like, I want to try to make money doing it. I want to be on TV and I got headshots and I got an agent in Seattle. And like that was what I was like, I'm going to do this as much as I can. And then I thought, everyone was like, well, you go to Hollywood to be big and, you know, like famous and rich. And I was like, look, if it happens, great. I want to make money doing this. Yeah.

I don't want this to be a hobby. And this seems like the place where they hand out the money. Yes. And if you are so lucky, and it's not like, so anyway, yeah, I had, I married Sarah and I was like, you got to give me five years either in New York or L.A. And if it doesn't work, we'll come back and I'll just become a serial killer because it's the Northwest. And knives. Yeah, knives. I've got the knives, honey. And then just, it'd be a shame to waste them. Yeah, reading a book in the rain, just crying. And that's how that, yeah. Well, but, um, is it possible to make a living?

as an actor in Seattle? Like, are there many people who are full-time actors in Seattle? Yeah. I think there was a time. Like, there was a crazy, wonderful theater scene. I think it's still pretty good, but it's shrunk.

Maybe it's gotten better. And who's ever listening and be like, fuck you, McHill. So, and a good improv scene. Yeah. It always had a thriving theater scene.

And there was a moment when there was multiple TV shows being shot there. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then that all went away. Is there much of an advertising commercial sort of thing? Because in Chicago, that people could, they could patch together a living with commercials because there were so many commercials. Yeah, I think there was, I don't actually, like, there was a time when they were shooting tons of stuff in Seattle.

Microsoft has their own film studio. Oh, yeah. I think Amazon does too. I mean, Amazon, but for industrial videos, which I did a thousand million of them. And so I don't, I think you. could, but I haven't seen breakdowns for, like when I'm doing an ad or something, they go, here are the cities we would like to shoot it in. And it was always like, it would be Vancouver, Atlanta, Toronto, and then it would go Buenos Aires and Mexico City. Yeah, Mexico City. And it was never,

it hasn't been Seattle in a long time. In a long time. But I got on a TV show in the 90s in Seattle, which doesn't exist anymore called Almost Live, which I got so lucky to be on, which was where like Bill and I, the science guy came out of. And so they took pity on me. What was the format of that show? It was sketch. It was like a, it was, it was on the NBC affiliate. We pushed SNL to 1205.

So we had tons of eyeballs. And so the news would be 11 to 1130. Yeah. And then it was you guys. Yeah. For a half hour? For a half hour. Wow.

And we wrote sketches and John Keister, who was the host of the show, came out and would do a monologue. Keister, what a comedy name. That's good. Yeah, yeah. He's still, still, he's, I just saw him. He's great. And this guy, got in Pat Hashman, who was the voice of Bill Nye, and then he had a huge radio career, Bob Nelson wrote, he was one of the best sketch writers I know.

He wrote the movie Nebraska. Oh, wow. And got nominated for a Oscar. Anyway, so we came out of that, I came out of that thinking when I got here, I'd be like, well, look at this. I got all this. Yeah, I was on TV. Look at me.

And then I proceeded to not be able to get an agent. I've never encountered, well, no, that's not true. Padgett Brewster hosted some kind of music show in San Francisco. Locally. Yeah, it was like a local show. On like local cable or on? Yeah, I'm not exactly sure. But it was on locally.

But I don't think it was necessarily a comedy thing. I think it was more a hosting kind of. kind of gig, but other than that, you know, like, regional television just doesn't exist much anymore. No. But that's really, you know, I don't know anybody else who was like, I was on a TV show in my hometown and then came to L.A. to be like, you got any TV shows here? Can I do one?

Yes. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Well, this woman named Nancy Guppy, who's been a friend of mine for decades, she was on it and has found a way to be on TV. in Seattle for years. So she's a very rare exception, but yeah. Padget Brewster, genius.

Yes, very much. Was on community. Yeah. Boy, my gosh. Yeah, she's great. It was like Robinson Canoe. Baseball player guys, great hitter. And she just came in and cranked every time.

I was like, she was magic. I know, I know. And so kind. And I mean, you know, I love that she's been working, but like on that she's been doing criminal minds criminal minds i mean god bless her but it's like she's one of the criminal 12 vacation houses but yeah but she's so funny she's just so good and such a strong comedic my gosh actor i mean like i say god i certainly would have been on criminal minds for as long as they would have let me go i'm in clickety clack clickety clack clickety clack all right i broke through we're in clickety

clack like because that's what I would be and then we gotta we gotta go talk to you want to get the guy we gotta you gotta go talk to that guy you talk to the guy yeah that guy sends you right right right right and I'd be like a weirdo you know like a why would you be a weirdo because because first of all I'm not hot I mean I believe me I think I'm a handsome person but let's make this uncomfortable do you find Andy hot guys well what the fuck are they gonna say well I mean they have to they have to live here with me I don't feel like you need to be fully hot. No, but in those shows, there always is the person that stays back in the office and they're the computer guy. It's the same thing in like action movies. And that's where the fat guy

lives. And he's always like, oh, I don't know, you know, or like, you know, I'm nervous. You know, I have social anxiety and, you know, but then it, you know, but he's a genius. Hey, can you hack that traffic light? Sure, no problem. Like a cliquity clack. Beetles walking over. Wait a minute. You hacked a traffic light with three clickety clacks? Yep, that's it.

There we go. I'll turn them all red. Glink. Thanks, buddy. You know. And then they were like, you're, you're a criminal now. You're not, you shouldn't be able to do that. They don't, that's not, they don't think about that.

Because you could kill the main, the lead easily. I know. You're just like, all right, and I see where he is. Right. Right. And now I'm going to make that red light, but the other one will be a green light. I'm going to blow out the pilot light in his water. Would you take it if you were offered a procedural crime drama today?

In a fucking minute. You would do it. In a fucking minute. They're like. Absolutely. Okay. I mean, because, well, A, just because, well, you know, it's a job and I, and this is what I do. Yeah.

But also just there's so little work out there now. And it's the thing that I really miss is just making stuff. Like I just, I, I, I, I, I like being on a set. I like. And the end product is kind of, at this point, secondary, you know, because I can control the quality control of this particular machine being me. But then you realize after a few years in this, like, oh, God, the end product, I don't have, I have such a tiny, tiny contribution to that. I have no power in terms of like what this thing ends up being. So I can just take care of my department, which is me, and do good work and make people happy and make it a good workplace.

What if you were offered a Broadway play? Would you do that? Yeah, I probably would. It's not my thing. Like, I'm not. But you've been on stages. No, I've been on stages, but it's, I don't have that, like, people love to do theater. Like, I like making movies and movies and TV shows. But if someone said this is going to be six months, you're going to rehearse for four months. Yes. And then you're going to have two-month run. And if it's going well, this goes on for another year.

Sure. I don't know if that's exactly how it works. Well, it's, no, it's not, it's kind of close. I mean, because they have inquired about a couple of different things. And I'm like, yeah, sure, that would be, that would be fun. Is there anything that you were like, nope, can't do it? Just the quality of particular. Like, I just turned down an indie movie that was just, just,

not not good what if they were like how about for two million dollars yes yes no there's there's certainly as there's the shifting there's like yeah this this this this movie this script is shitty and they're paying this much wait a minute they're going to pay this much well you know what that script isn't so yeah they just showed uh harrison ford in an interview where they were like well now you're playing in this it was some superhero movie that's coming on and he's like and you're wearing these costumes, is it hard to get into that and take yourself seriously? He's like, that's what the money's for. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

And I was like, that's right. This is what we're, this is the job. Yeah. This is what we do it. Yeah, yeah. And that's why Harrison Ford and I have equal careers. Why are you laughing? Dang it.

All right. So I think we have our work cut out for ourselves. Yeah, yeah. We're going to do a Broadway show where we make millions of dollars? Right, right, right. Sure. Absolutely. I don't know if those, they make millions of dollars for the people Yeah, I don't think, you know, at the top of the... I'm very happy that when, like, Ellen DeGeneres and Dwayne Johnson and Jamie Fox and Snoop,

they all started doing game shows. Yes. And that broke the shell of actors. It was so odd because it was like, you're a movie actor, you're a TV actor. There's no way you'll be a host. Forget that. Yeah, yeah. Unless it was, unless you're a comedian and then you can host the Oscars, this is the

And, like, you know, if you're Don Rickles way back when, you could do that, but don't, you stay in your lane. Yeah. And then these guys came along with. Now there's no lane. Yeah, I mean. And I was so happy. Yeah. Like, I, this, because I love doing it.

Yeah, no, it's really fun. So watch the 1% Club on Fox premiering June 10th. Is that, is that, but don't you do something else on Game Show Network? Uh, I do. Well, I was doing crime scene kitchen on Fox. Right. And House of Villains. on Peacock, which is kind of a game show,

but it's more of a reality show where, uh, yes. Yeah, but I thought you hosted like, I don't know, press your luck or something like that. Oh, uh, card sharks, which was on ABC. Okay. Which, uh, we, is that just in reruns?

It must be. Yeah, yeah. We only, I think we only did, I think two or three seasons, which was great. But I kept saying, and I think,

I was like, I think we're giving away too much money. Uh, because we're just flipping over cards. And multiple shows, people walked away with like $800,000. Yeah, yeah. And so they kept reassuring me because the show was fun and it's a fun, I mean, it's just, it's such a fun, that game has been around.

Yes. Since cards were invented, you just turn the card over and you're like, higher or lower. I think it's to be higher than a four. It's higher than a four. Do you want to keep going? It's a jack, hire or lower. Do you want to keep going? Yes, it's going to be lower.

And then it's a queen and then they're heartbroken. But we kept giving away. And then when it was canceled, I was like, how come what happened? They're like, oh, you guys gave way too much money. And I was like, but I'm saying it the whole time. That's what's so great about that match game that we've done before. Yes. Where it's not like it's life-changing crazy money, but that screwing around the game and they're having a good time with it.

I'm not saying you shouldn't go like, that's why millionaire is such a great show because it, you know, but it's just a different piece. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I guess if we had been as popular as millionaire, we'd still be around. Yeah, but no, it's, I mean, and you're doing that, but you're also still, like, Animal Control is going to season four. See, that's great. And how many episodes of that is a season? 12 this time. Wow, nice.

Yeah, it's been like 8 and 10. Yeah, yeah. But they picked us up for 12. And so it's great. Has that changed venues? That has no. No. Crime Scene Kitchen.

It was on Fox. It was on Fox. It was on Fox. But it goes on Fox. But it goes on to Hulu the next day. I see. And then there was, so now, yes. So now it's on both.

Okay. On Crime Scene Kitchen, we shot the first season in L.A., second season in Georgia, third season in Toronto. And we're hoping for that four seasons. Buenos Aires. Next. You might go to, you know, Rob Lowe, who's part of the Teen Coco, a podcast family. He's ugly.

Host, yeah, fucking gross. Yeah, every time I see him, I'm. I'm like, yeah, yeah. This is the elephant man. The Ugo show with Rob Lowe. Here comes that character actor. But he does that show the floor. Yeah, huge.

And they shoot that in Dublin. You notice I can't even drink water? Yeah, yeah, yeah. I was almost a spit. They also shoot the name that tune in Dublin. Yes, I know. I was on Name That Tune. And again, and again, this is my, how'd you do in the country music?

My standards, when they're like, we want you to do Name That Tune. And I was like, I don't think I'll be very good at that. So I don't think so. It's shooting in Dublin. You know what? I would love to be on name that too. They'll fly me to Dublin? Yeah, yeah, yeah.

And I did okay. You did okay in your lane? Like, that's how I know I would do okay with the songs that from the 80s and 90s. Yeah, but once it gets to like, I don't know, like 2000s pop, I don't know what the fuck. Or country music and rap music. Some country music, like old country music, I would know. Yeah.

And, I mean, and like the, you know, the really big ones that, you know, I got friends in low places. Like that, I would like, okay, that one I know, you know. Can you name like a Casey Musgrave song? Is that her name? Did I get it right? Yes. Yeah, actually, I think there's something like, girl, isn't that one of her? Girl?

I think there's a song called Girl. Why did you say it like you were guessing on the game show? Is it girl? Because I think there's a question mark at this. Girl? Well, I think in Ireland, you know, they have, their tax rebates are very good. Well, and that's why when you walk around Dublin, it's all Google buildings. Oh, yeah.

It's all Google. Yeah, yeah. There's no. Well, I love to that there's like, there's no indication because they fly the contestants over too. And they must do that with the floor. Is that what it's called? Yeah. But there's no indication except when they shoot the audience and, you know, and it's just lepercans.

pretty much it's just like that very it's like a very shallow gene pool in the audience and then and then you see the credits and it's and then you see the credits and it's it's all like oh nigels and coals and you know like what do you guys were just looking at a case and muskish girl is there oh wow girl girl what's her biggest yeah what's her hits Flower Child? That's a girl. Slow burn. Flower Child can be a boy. I dare you.

Slow burn. That's a girl. Is it? Yeah. So are you a fan? Yeah, I like the old album. Why did you have to look at him to see if you were going to, they're like, do I like him? Because he's a tyrant.

Do I like her? First of all, he's told her never to speak. They're playing a small game show themselves. Yes, they are. They have a podcast going over there. It's a whispered podcast. It's ASMR. Oh, my gosh, that would be such a great point.

Watching two old men yap at each other while we try to have a conversation. They're still going on. They brought up Casey Miss Grave. They don't even just tell them that girls a song. They won't know the difference. They both have had plenty of work and they all complain like they complain like they We pull out like pipes and pack the pipe. Anyway, you know what else happened when I was in the 90s?

In my late 40s. Yeah. Is there stuff that you feel like you've left undone? Yes. I have regret. I have so many. This is spiritually. Let's get into your fucking regrets, man.

Everything. Yeah, I regret everything. Yeah. I have a lot of Peter Pan. I mean, not Peter Pan syndrome and, you know, imposter syndrome. So it's great. Well, you know, Craig, I want to, I want Dietz. No, I always feel like, well, probably could have done a better job than that.

Yeah, yeah. And then I just, yeah, then I'll have a beer and I'll forget about it. Isn't it fucking crazy? And then I'll want to play video games. And then I were like, oh, wait, you don't know how to anymore. And then I'll go do some dips. I have like, and by the way, people, he means exercise, not like. Not dipping.

No, yeah, not French onion dip. Yeah. Like that one downtown? Not Satsiki. I love, yeah. But I have spent my whole life feeling like there's been a voice in my head that's been like, you're not doing enough. Yeah, yeah, it's nice. Yeah, yeah, okay, you're doing fine.

But, you know, like, you should be writing more. You know, and like, yeah, yeah, you're doing fine. But you're like, why aren't you out hustling really trying to shake up? Yeah. Shake the trees and get more things. And it's like, yeah, yeah, you're fine. But it is like, it's like. It's constantly tapping on.

Yeah. It's like, it's like, I, like bad parenting of myself. Yeah. Like, you know, like, look, honey, I love you, but you are basically a disappointment. Yes. That's the, the auto. My wife and I literally had this conversation last night. Did you really? I was like, she was like, it seems like you're upset.

And I was like, well, I feel like you're upset with me because I've disappointed. She goes, no, no, I'm not. I'm not. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But, uh, but I was like, okay, because I. thought that I got that wrong and she was like well that's where you're wrong you need to stop looking at things as if you're just getting them right or wrong yeah yeah and then she'll be like because I love you and I want to be with you and I'm okay see you later and then I end up crying

but yeah I think it's gotten worse for me actually I think there was a time when I was like oh look I'm just fucking around and I got so lucky you know yeah and then now I'm like oh man this anxiety just comes up and smacks me in the face right right and then sometimes it's not there. Are you in therapy at all? Oh, no, no, no, no. Why not? That would be helpful. Yes, fully on and off. Yeah. Yeah. Then I get busy and I'm like, oh, I should really do that. And then I don't. Yeah, yeah. And then I just like hug my French bulldog. And then my wife goes, I think you're suffocating him. And I was like, he's suffocating me. Yeah. No, I even like, yeah, I can always tell when it's rearing its head. Yeah, yeah. It's great. It's great.

yeah no it's it's it's important to you kids have anxiety no yeah yeah no they do Jesus their their life is shit Jesus Christ I would not want to be their age now I'm at least I'm at least closer to that that dirt nap that wonderful dirt nap you know my gosh is that the name of the podcast dirt nap yeah one step closer to the dirt nap I do going to be immolated. I'm going to be cremated and dumped into water because I think it's criminal to waste real estate on a dead body. But why spend all that time with like burning it? I mean, that's a lot of energy and pollution. Listen, I'd let him fucking drop me into a whale's mouth if, if they could. Or, because honestly, that way is that might pretty see world back.

I would not. I would not. He just passed away a week ago. I think we took him out of the freezer. It's Andy Richter, everybody. If I was a nice meal to some carnivore, I think that would be a great way to sort of go out. Like, yep, at least I was useful there. Rent a boat, load up on, but then if you load it up on.

Get that pot of orcas, let them attack the boat, you know, in an engineered way like they're starting to learn to do. And then just rip me from limb to limb. You wouldn't want to take anything to relax, I guess, because then it would be in your bloodstream, and then it would affect the whales. Yeah, right. That's true. Did you think it would go this way, guys, or is this what happens on all dirt map? Yeah, yeah, that's right. It would be, we threw my grandmas and grandfather's ashes into, well, separate places. Right.

We climbed a mountain and dumped her ashes, and then my grandfather, we threw his into Lake Washington. Nice. Yeah. See, he was partially cremated. What does that mean? Yeah, they just didn't finish. So we were like, well, we just pull it out of the oven. We rented a boat.

Right. There's a rib cage that we keep magazines in. I guess it's easier to hold on to, but this is, what do we, we're not paying for this, are we? Jerks. Yeah, no, that's, do you have any, do you have end of life directions yet? Well, yeah, we made our wills, our, it's a living will. yeah yeah so we're always i don't even know i you're in it am i yep yep what do i get well you'll see the boys you must take care of these boys they need to come live with you it activates a sleeper

agent that goes after all these friends of mine yeah uh and it becomes a fun game oh that's nice yeah no we've done all that you know we've set it that all up and it's weird to think about yeah yeah it is weird because you know like that when i remember when was it when prince had no will Right. Right. And that seemed insane to me. Right. Especially with all your demos. Yeah. They're all in that closet. Paisley Park as he was partial. I have my own version of Paisley Park, which is a storage room full of plastic bins. I just found a plastic. I have a plastic bit. This is going to sound really wonderfully good. But I was storing a bunch of wine because I had bought too much wine. Right. But somehow some boxes of papers were mixed in with the wine. I don't know how. Yeah.

And I pulled this box out and it was all headshots and like 10 copies of September 12th, 2001. Wow. The day after September 11th. And I'm like, what? And weird, why did I, what's happening? I really was focused on my career and this tragedy and I saved them all. Yeah, yeah. So I brought it out to Sarah last night, the 9-11, like, thousands dead, buildings burning, and then a headshot.

Is that what you thought she was disappointed in you about? She was like, I'm married a weirdo. She just figured that out. Yeah. But she had that hasn't been evident. My gosh. So anyway, if you guys need any souvenirs from September 12th, I've got multiple magazines. You should start an Etsy business and then just wrap everything in those papers.

And people just be like, what the fuck is with this? I just wanted a, I just wanted a ceramic donkey. Merry Christmas. Oh, my gosh. Oh, my God. And then the business takes off. Yeah, yeah. And I now stop buying, like, tragic events that have happened.

Absolutely. Can you send me all the metal disaster? Yeah. Well, that's a good one, the shuttle. Oh, my gosh. I was just going to say mass shooting. Mass shootings. Those are fun, too.

There's a lot of them. Yeah, those are a bummer. Oh, is this the way they usually go? Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. No. The dirt sleep. Yesterday, me and Bob, the drag queen,

talked about carving our own faces off. It was, no, we didn't really. We didn't really. I would listen to that. Yeah. Well, you know, it was a good interview. Yeah, fuck. Are we out?

Wait, what time is it? We're getting close, yeah, 11.30. Oh. It's an hour. An hour is enough of me for anybody. Oh, my gosh, here we go. I don't believe. Look, if you had told, I know you get this from a lot of fans from the 90s, but if you were like, if you said, I'm not kidding.

This will be, hold on to your hats. Yeah, fucking Boston hat. Oh, he does have a hat. Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, if you had said, like, that hat is a worn. to all minorities. That's why he wears that Boston hat. Wait,

is Boston so racist? No, absolutely. Oh, my gosh. Yeah, yeah. He works so hard at keeping it underwrapped, which I really respect. Oh.

Yeah, yeah. Wow. All right. Well, this doesn't seem as... No, no, go ahead. Go ahead. Hold on to your hats. Hold on to that.

But I was like, if you had said to me, because I've told Conan this, and Conan always goes, thank you for saying that because I can tell when because people yeah and I was like if you told me it's like oh in it's going to be 1996 you're going to be watching because I've watched every night and Star Trek next generation reruns yep uh and if you had said oh somehow 30 years from now you're just going to be talking to Andy Richter in Hollywood and you're going to know each other after years of knowing years of knowing each other yeah I would have been like oh I did something right some worked I worked somehow I did something right so Well, that's nice. Thank you. And that is a meaningful thing to hear. But it is the kind of thing that like I don't, I have like an allergy to self-aggrandizement, you know, or, you know, like you're being too much in love with the.

Right. But do you think we don't do it, we should do it a little bit? Yes. No. And I mean, it is really, it is really nice. it is really nice that you say that and I and it's you know it's nice to know that like like we're peers and and friends and that there was a point at which you wanted to be my peer and my friend before we were those things you know yeah um and that is it's like it's just a plain

old compliment but it's you know again it's like it goes into the ear and then like it sits next to the guy next to the guy that says you don't do enough you fucking why are you even here let's talk I would love to spend more time with you just keep tapping me on the shoulder sometimes I'm like oh fuck

and then I get into my Porsche and I'm like what an asshole yeah yeah yeah no I know I actually Conan pointed out when I bought this Porsche he was like you know it's really good to have things that prove you've done something

and he's like in our lives I'm like wait you don't think I've done anything But this car? Wait, what? This car validates me? Oh, yeah, it's a thing. It's like, that made me happy. So then I'm like, I should get 12.

Yeah. Maybe that will make me feel better. I would say, I mean, yes, it's nice to have nice things, but I would say that it's more, you know, the fact that you know, funny, talented, good people. Yes. That's, that's much more valuable. I agree. And that's where, you know, we should be deriving our value. No, when we saw each other.

Very shallow, shallow man. Well, he has basically a brainstem. And then it's just... You heard me, Conan. It's just taffy. You heard me. You know, we were at that... I just pictured his head being on, but like at the fairs, the taffy things that, you know, like

that stretch taffy, you know, like the two intersecting arms. And that's just what's in his head all the time. Mine is the hot dog rollers at 7-Eleven. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then there's a piece of plastic on those that said, we'll be filled soon. I feel so bad for that. I'm like, wow, they even have to put.

What was I going to say? I thought I saw you almost die at the, again, a moment where, like, Jimmy Kimmel used to have this Father's Day. Yeah, softball game. Yeah, where I'd be like, well, fucking Tony Romo's up to bat. I was like, what kind of a weird life is this? And then you were playing first base and you fell over, like you were stretching for a ball and fucking hit.

the deck and I was like, we're all going to die out here. I got so worried for a moment. I don't even remember. I don't even remember doing that. You hit the deck so hard. I was worried. I was like, I just watched Andy Richter die. And then you got up and continued to play. And I'm like, did I get the ball, though? Or did I miss it? You did. You stopped the ball. Oh, good. I don't think you made the play, but the ball stopped. That's something. I don't even remember. We're very lucky. Yeah. See how that went?

But I really do, like, I go like, yeah, for all the shit that I, like, and then I'm like, oh, I'm in the house that I bought with the money that I did this with. So, fucking, hey. Yeah. It's like this thing. I got friends that are like, can you not, can you just stop talking like this for a while, Joel? I'm like, yeah. Yeah, yeah, no, I know.

It's like, it's the people, I'm sure. And I'm sorry to the people out there who are like, stop it, you fucking whiny babies. But listen, this is the point. People are fucked up. And that's why you clicked on this link is to learn Because you're sick From me and Joel McHale that people are fucked up And we didn't like we'd like to invite you

And from Sean and Joanne too there they're Jesus Christ they're a mess Look at the torture they've had to endure for an hour Absolutely And they were like I'm being paid to just watch these old I was like it's like a old well No Not well I have to pretend to laugh

It's like I'm in an old folks home Yeah Do we have to change them at some point? Do we roll them over for the bed source? Are we going through their belongings? Good God. You star in the series Animal Control. Yes.

Once a new, it's the... We start shooting in August, so it'll premiere in January. Shooting here? Vancouver. Oh, in Vancouver. Well, at least Vancouver's better in August than here. Vancouver is one of the most magical places in August.

I love Vancouver. Yeah, yeah. Then they have a... I'm going to miss it. they have a one of the they have this week it's so beautiful the sun's out till 1030 and they have a fireworks competition for a week on the shore yeah and each kind like like now england shall blow off fireworks for two hours every night they used to do that i don't know if maybe they they moved it but it was in montreal oh and uh and i and you would go to la ronde which is a amusement park on a

river in the middle of that's french yes yes they speak french there all right occasionally. I mean, it's a very guttural French, but it's French. And you would watch, you, like, you could get tickets where you sit in sort of an outdoor amphitheater, and it's being presented to you, and it's synced to music, and they'd close a bridge, and people would stand on the bridge and watch the fireworks. And I fucking loved it, and we went there twice, and I didn't, it sounds like the same thing, and it would be like, tonight, Italy, you know, and then tomorrow.

80,000 people wind the Shorthand. Yeah. And now it's so popular to go like, oh, fireworks, just because your dogs get scared. And I get dogs and I love my dogs. And yeah, it scares them. But I mean, come on, fucking fireworks. Well, it's fine.

Oh, my God. But the Seafar, which is my favorite thing on the planet, it's in Seattle where it's just basically a party on Lake Washington. Yeah. There's fireworks, but every day the blue angels come out. And I, for an hour, and I'm like, this is the, And my grandmother used to be like, I have to leave town. It's so loud.

It sets off all the car alarms and I am jumping up and down. Right, right. And you're like, see you later, lady. It's the greatest. Anyway, speaking in Montreal, yes. If you want to listen to a good podcast. A good podcast. Yeah, you want to listen a good one.

It's a history podcast called The Dark North about the history of crime in Montreal. Oh, wow. That's right up my alley. That sounds fucking awesome. It is. No, Montreal, the Montreal Mafia is. It is for real. And it's not like, and it's not like they're trying to solve a mystery.

They're like, here's the history. Here's how it goes. And it's like, and then the hell's angels showed up. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You also have animal control. Yeah, there's upcoming Scream 7. Yes. So excited.

It's a lucky number and they thought to bring you on. Meaning I'm the lucky part of it? I think so. Oh, I think Nav Campbell would be like, oh, he's so lucky to be in this. And is that shot? She's so, she's one of those lovely people I've ever, I was, I was like, I cannot believe how she's freaking movie star, man. I had a huge crush on her when I was a kid. Yeah, yeah.

And then Kevin Williams. When's that coming out? February. February? It's all shot? It's all shot. Nice. Yeah.

And you're in the upcoming movie reimagined with Paula Patton, Kate McCutche, and Josh Holloway. Yeah, we just shot that in New York. Nice. And then we're shooting House of it. villains. Oh, nice. And, uh, 1% club comes out next month. And one percent club is a game show on Fox and the next day on Hulu. And what's that about? That's about rich people. No, uh, you're going to love it, kids. Uh, you, 100 contestants. Yeah. And then you, it's trivia. It's trivia and math or not, it's like, uh, mind tease questions. Right, right, right. But, uh, they'll be like,

all right, we ask nine, of the hundred people last 90% of these. 90 got it right. So then you ask them, you see how many get it right? And then you just shrink it down until you get to. Oh, so when you, it's like one. Yeah, one person. One wrong answer and you're out. Yes. Okay.

Then you can, but you can skip ahead. But it's genuinely like as I'm hosting it, I don't know the answers because I'm, I'm the host and I'm not smart. Right. But they were, yeah, it's great. Oh, cool. So June 10th, guys. That's fun. I'll test you afterwards, okay?

All right. All right. Joel, thank you for coming. Thank you for having me. really fun. I don't know if anybody was learned anything. And deeply thoughtful. Well, thank you. And, you know, as are you. With your gifts of weapons. You're always, what's great about Andy's, you've seen him a party. He always like, how are you? And he means it. Yeah. Well, I mean, yeah. Do I? I don't know. There's a lot of

people that don't. Yeah, that is true. And I don't think it's a Hollywood thing. That is true. No, it's not really. I, you know, I defend Hollywood to the death because people have, you know, the weird people's like, yeah, but everyone's just trying to make a buck and they're working their asses off. Right, right, right. Oh, there's a lot of people here are full of shit, but it's better than 95% of the places in the world. Yeah. I think. You know, there's also a lot of really great people. You guys are fired, by the way. You did, fine. Yeah, yeah. Goodbye. All right, and goodbye to all you. Thank you for listening. I'll be back next week with more of the three questions, although we didn't really get to any three questions. We didn't need them. What have you learned?

I learned that you don't have enough knives. The three questions with Andy Richter is a team Coco production. It is produced by Sean Doherty and engineered by Rich Garcia. Additional engineering support by Eduardo Perez and Joanna Samuel. Executive produced by Nick Leow, Adam Sacks, and Jeff Ross. Talent booking by Paula Davis, Gina Battista, with assistance from Maddie Ogden. Research by Alyssa Graal. Don't forget to rate and review and subscribe to the three questions with Andy Richter,

wherever you get your podcasts. And do you have a favorite question you always like to ask people? Let us know in the review section. Can't you tell my loves are growing? Can't you feel it ain't it showing? Oh, you must be a-knowing. I've got a big, big love.

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