The Three Questions with Andy Richter - Peri Gilpin

Episode Date: October 29, 2024

Actress Peri Gilpin, best known for her role as Roz Doyle in the classic sitcom "Frasier," joins Andy Richter to discuss the surprising way she was discovered, her Texas upbringing, her eventful Star Trek cruise experience, her return as Roz in the “Frasier” reboot, working through loss, and much more.Do you want to talk to Andy live on SiriusXM’s Conan O’Brien Radio? Leave a voicemail at 855-266-2604 or fill out our Google Form at BIT.LY/CALLANDYRICHTER. Listen to "The Andy Richter Call-In Show" every Wednesday at 1pm Pacific on SiriusXM's Conan O'Brien Channel.

Hey everybody, welcome back to The Three Questions. I'm the host of The Three Questions, Andy Richter. And this week, I am here with the great Perry Gilpin. I love her so much. She's best known for her amazing work on Frasier as Roz Doyle, but she's been doing great work across television for years. She's returned for the new season of the Frasier reboot, available now on Paramount Plus. We talked about growing up in Texas, a life and show business, loss, and a lot more. Here's my great conversation with the great Perry Gilpin. My father-in-law took, he retired and he took everyone on an Alaskan cruise. But no, that was not one of the changes.

But I went to Alaska like a few weeks ago. And did you love it? On a cruise. I loved Alaska, being on a cruise ship, not so much. Really? Yeah, it was by like the third or fourth day. It was a week. And I'm very grateful to my father-in-law for doing it.

And it's the first time in my adult life that anyone has ever paid for me to go on vacation. You know, like I just, I didn't think that would ever be something I would enjoy again. But yeah, it got to be a bit much. Just that being on the ship and it being crowded and it being lots of old white people,

to be frank. I was on one once. I was on a Star Trek cruise. Oh, wow. With Danny Davis, the actor Danny Davis. He's a brilliant stage actor. Did you do Stark? I was never on it. And you just went on along for the ride? Yes. And George Takei was across the hall from us.

Oh, wow. Danny had played like Moriarty, who was a hologram. Oh, right. And he was really, really popular. But there were stars from the original Star Trek on this, on the cruise. Yeah, yeah. And we were on the oldest going sea vessel. We called it the Dossecis because it had three Xs on the towers. Oh, wow.

And at one point, we saved a bunch of Cuban refugees that were on a raft out in the middle of the ocean. Wow. Because the rule of law in the ocean is that you have to stop and get. Yeah. And most of those cruise ships just keep going. Oh, really? But our captain did not.

Wow. So, there were suddenly people in Star Trek costumes that were, you know, joining in on the rescue. It was very dramatic. Wow. It was really amazing. But then we just were laughing going when they came onto the ship, they probably went, oh my God, it's a start.

We'll get back on the raft. We're very anti-nerd in Cuba. Or maybe they were into it, but they also, you know, then they sunk the raft because, I mean, it looked like the raft sunk just as the refugees got off of it, but actually they sunk it so that another- They need to, because it's debris and it's dangerous. Yeah. So it felt, you know,

it was the talk of the rest of the crew. Wow. But Danny and I found out that the nanny, which he was on, and Frazier, which I was on, got picked up on our flight home from Florida- Oh, wow. In USA Today. What a fun week.

What a fun week. It was a great week. It was a great week, yeah. It was a great an eventful week. Were the Cuban refugees then just mixed in with the jet? Were they at Uhura's signings and things? No, I think they stayed below. I think they had food. The captain told everyone what was going on. So they got to take a shower, get some rest, get some food, and then go back to Miami. And if they had family there, they could possibly stay. If not, they were gonna go back, I guess. Oh, wow.

And how far were you from Miami? Well, we were down, at one point I looked out the window and said, Danny, what is that land over there? And he goes, that's Cuba. You could almost swim. I mean, we were so close. And I don't really know enough about it. So I said, are we supposed to be this close?

Is it okay? So I guess we were down there. So they weren't far, but they'd been out for a while. I think they were really tired and they didn't have much of a chance of getting anywhere. Wow. No, I just mean like, did they have to put up with you guys going to Nassau?

In costume. Yeah, like people in costume going to different sort of fabulous places, just waiting to get off the boat. No, everyone was going back to Miami and we were almost back. Oh, okay. Oh, that's fun. Yeah, Sonam Avsesian, who is Conan's, his assistant who now is his partner in his podcast,

she was on the same cruise I was a few years ago, but there was a murder. Oh my God. Some guy murdered his wife on the cruise. Like, for real? I mean, did they have a body or was it that one where she got? I think she went over, you know, and what she told me is that there were kids on the cruise. Oh my God.

It just, and then, I mean, that's got to put a damper on the trip for everybody. When that worked, I mean, I don't, you know, I mean, we're laughing here because we're ghouls, but I just, it's like, that's, I don't know if I could leave my cabin after that. And not that I would, but it's just like, okay, this is, you know, it's like, I don't know. It's like, if somebody was horribly injured in a football game, it's like, how do you keep playing football? But the show must go on. It certainly must. Just like this podcast, we've gotten off on cruise stories here.

You grew up in Texas. You are Texan and you can still hear it in your voice as much as you try to hide it. As much as I try. I try real hard. And how long did you live in Texas? From birth until about, I would say 1920. I went to school at UT for a couple of years in Austin

and I went to London and once I was in London, I kind of came back for a minute, went to New York, came out here. And growing up, did you know you were always gonna maybe probably leave Texas? Well, I always wanted to be an actress from the time I was eight. Wow. I wanted to be a school teacher because my mom was a school teacher and then I realized

my mom was a frustrated actress because I could see her in a play. And I was like, oh, now I want to be an actress. Teachers and ministers are like that show business. It's just a different kind of show business. Completely. I love that you said that. Yeah. It's just a different kind of show business. Completely, I love that you said that. That's so true. So, I mean, she was out here a lot with my little brother and sister.

They were both child actors. Oh, wow, I didn't know that. And she was the actor for pilot season. Yeah, my brother played the little boy on Jaws 2. Oh, wow. Sean, and did more work than that. My little sister was also an actress, but they both kind of burned out early. Whose idea was that? Was it your mom's? Do you think she was sort of projecting her frustration onto her children? No, it

was practical. She did a commercial for Rice Aroney and it took 14 hours to shoot because the kids were not behaving and she was like, if these were mine, we'd be out of here. Oh, that's great. And they did like their first national commercials at four and 10 months old. I mean, together. Yeah, yeah.

And they worked a lot. They just grew up in it and they really loved it until they didn't anymore. And then they stopped. And your mom was, she was like, okay with that? Absolutely. Yeah. Because it's, I mean, just from my experience in show business, which started in Chicago,

I went to film school and I worked on commercials when I got out of film school and witnessing, like Chicago stage moms with their kids in commercials. We did a phone commercial and they picked two little girls, there were maybe six. It was like a Christmas time. Grandma's kids first called grandma at Christmas time, and they had their A girl and their

B girl, like their first choice and their second choice. Early morning, suburban house, the first girl was not feeling it. It was 7 a.m. and she was kind of crabby and kind of, you know, so they brought in the second girl who was nailing it, again, like at 7.20 a.m. And I was in the living room looking at the video screen with the other mother and the other girl and the little girl was watching the second choice, kill it, and she's going, let me back in there, Mommy.

Let me back in there, Mommy. I can do it now, Mommy, I can do it. And her mother was going like, well, maybe you should have done it the first time. Maybe now you'll learn when it's time to perform. You've got, there's all these people working on it who are just sitting there chilled. And I just, I, it's like there are so many unhealthy.

Yes, very, very. Yeah. I don't think, I think my mom was very conscious of that and she was a school teacher for a long time before that. Very, very. Yeah. I don't think, I think my mom was very conscious of that and she was a school teacher for a long time before that. And her last job was on Barney. She played the set teacher. Oh, wow.

And I- So she wasn't the actual teacher, she was the played teacher. Set teacher, yes. Yeah, yeah. But we went to, we went actually to Washington, D.C. She was in the National Library and she got to play Mother Goose and Barney was with her. And I was so funny, I went to join her because she was actually

she was pretty sick, but she was just, this was her love, you know? So she was up on the stage reading to these kids, but like the guys setting it all up had, you know how juice, there's a juice that comes in a bottle that looks like Jack Daniels, you know, they were like drinking that and the kids were screaming and it was like, it was so awesome. Yeah, yeah. But she, she was, tried to be super responsible and because she'd been an actress and she'd been a model and done commercials herself and then also been a school teacher, she was really, really careful with that the, that both, I call them the kids, that both Mark

and April and my sister Patty were safe on a set and then things were cool. But I've seen it too. I remember I worked for a company that hired kids to come in and model like socks. It was like a catalog company. And I'd call you know so I would I called parents to bring their kids in and I remember once a mom was talking about her kids she goes she didn't get it. I can't even look at her. And it just broke my heart. Yeah. But that wasn't the case with the, our, in my family, the kids, my brother and sister just really got sick of it. They just didn't want to do it anymore. Yeah. And they didn't equate it with money. They didn't equate it with a job because they started so early.

Right. They thought it was fun. It would be fun. Yeah. But I think that's also the, this teacher that I went to a couple classes with, Ian, he was a child actor and he said the problem with child acting is when someone yells action or the scene starts, it doesn't matter how old you are, you have to be an adult. Yeah. And it's just too early. It's too much. You need to be a kid. But there was, but when I work with kids,

I'm always fascinated to see like, did the kid bring the mom or did the mom bring the kid? And there's huge difference there. Oh yeah, you can tell right away. You can tell right away and you can also, I mean, I'm very, I just, like my daughter, who's 18 now, there was a point at which, and she's very funny and very smart,

and there was a point at which she had friends, and I mean like 12, 13, who were working. And she asked me about it. And I just said, I won't, I won't. I said, it's not a safe environment. And I said, and there, you'll be around people who say they love you and that they care about you the most, but what they really care about is this thing

that makes money. And you will also be subject to judgments about every aspect of your being. And it will all be tying back to money. And it just, I was like, it's hard when you're 18 or 20 to deal with it, but to be 12 or 13 is extra, extra bad. Yeah, and I think you need to have a little bit of training, like, you know, you need to sort of know

what people are expecting of you. Yeah. You know, but if you're driven to do it, you can start at any time. Yeah. Well, I actually did have Sarah Silverman, she had her own show, the Sarah Silverman program, and she needed a little girl to say one cute line, to say, I'm daddy's girl. It was an episode where she wanted to, where she got pregnant, which is

one of the funniest beginnings of her show because she's like, I don't know, I'm gaining a lot of weight. And her friends are like, you're pregnant, you idiot. So she's going to give the child up for adoption. And she has all these prospective parents in the interview and I'm one of them. And there's just a point where my daughter was maybe four or five at the time. And she was a little kid and I wasn't pushing her. But then when it did come down to it, like you said, when it was time for her to say her line, I felt my own kind of like, there's a lot of people here. There's a lot on the line here. You got to get this right. And I started kind of for a couple of minutes was like, honey, you got it.

And then I was like, who gives a shit? No. And Sarah didn't care and the people making the show didn't care. But I really did feel that. But it was just because it was my own standards. I was projecting onto her and then I had to tell myself, hit the brakes. She's four. Like, don't, you know, it'll be fine, you know, and it was fine,

and you know, and she was really cute. And she has a Coogan account because of it. Where every year at tax time, you get to see her Coogan account, which has got like, I don't know, $200 in it now. Good, that could be like 600 million. In a thousand years. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Can't you tell my love's a-growing? Well then did you not do any child acting? I did, but I was in the Dallas Theater Center. I did a lot of it in theater. And why the difference? I don't know. I was just walking with my parents one day, I have near the Dallas Theater Center,

which is the only theater that Frank Lloyd Wright ever designed. Wow. And it's really beautiful. It's down by this little creek in Dallas. And these kids were having a class that were about my age and they were doing something weird. And I go, what are they doing?

And they were playing, they were being cigarette machines. That old children's classes. Exactly. And the teacher just said, do you want to see if you can do it? And then I did it and she thought I was great and I joined the class. And I loved going to that theater. I loved coming up, they called it the Golden Doors and we'd go go through the golden doors and that was the shop. And then have you ever been to Italy,

to the Cinque Terre, the, you know how they got the boats down that ramp, how that kind of circular ramp is how they got there? That's how their shop got stuff up to the stage. So cool. It's magical. Yeah, it is. And I just loved it.

I love being there. And so that was my- I do love that you got discovered being a cigarette machine. I know, which really fit for a long time. Kid, you got it. I lived up to that for many years. Oh, did you smoke? Oh, God, yeah.

Yeah, yeah. I quit when my kids were born. Yeah, I fell back into it a little bit. By the time my daughter was born, I finished. I was like, get done with it. It was, yeah. It was, I can't even believe, sometimes I can't even believe that I did it,

that I smoked. And then I can't even believe too, that like the other thing is, I can't believe that there was cigarette smoke everywhere. I know. Not, and within our lifetimes, you know? When I started on Conan, you could smoke any. And this is-

We smoked in our dressing rooms at Frasier the first time around, not now. But people would come up and go, can I light up a cigarette here? And we're like, yeah, go. Hell yeah. You gotta smoke them if you got them. Well, that was in the hallways

at Rockefeller Center when we started. When we first started, you'd see people running tapes from the edit bay to the newsroom smoking cigarettes as they ran down the hall with the tapes. But it closed down very shortly after that and the restaurant bands and stuff. But it's like, I remember riding on planes when people were smoking.

And it's like now somebody lights up on the, you know, down the street, I can tell it. And so it's amazing that people were just smoking everywhere, you know? And I say to Mike, I'm like, if you, I'll break your arm, honestly. That's my arm, that's my body. You can't, like you were worried about how your child

said a line. I'm so terrified. But, you know, they're in college now, so. Yeah, that's the kind of thing where I feel like you just gotta, you know, you filled them with knowledge and values as much as you can, and then you push them off and they- They have to do- Yeah, because it's like, like my daughter admitted to me like, I've vaped a few times and I was like, you know, I feel at least like, I look at it as a victory that she tells me.

Absolutely. You know what I mean? And mind you too, I just don't think they've ever smoked a cigarette. Yeah, yeah. But I, and I've just. Yeah, I mean, my kids probably have. Like my son went to art school.

So he smokes, I can't imagine what he hasn't smoked going to art school. So was that kind of your identity as a kid? Were you like the actress girl growing up? Yeah, in fact, that's so funny that you say, all my high school friends say you were so lucky that you knew from an early age what you wanted to do because you just aimed for it and you never varied. So you knew what your next step should be or you knew what you wanted to find out the next

steps were. Did your desire ever waver? Did you ever have second thoughts? No. Wow. No, I've always loved it. And it's it's like, one of my kids is in, she wants to be a vet. And so, and she's in her third year of college and she's, you know, in animal science. And so she sent us a video the other day of her and a horse.

And I was like, oh my God. And she was like, she's so interested. It's like, she goes, I'm so interested. Like the next thing and the next thing, she just keeps going for it, you know, because she just is, nothing about it disappoints her. She just wants more and more knowledge. And my other daughter's the same way

about design at her college. And I always felt that way too. That's such a blessing, you know. It is. Because, you know, to not have Hamlet disease where you doubt fucking everything, which I mean, throughout different points in my life, I was like, I don't have any idea

if this is the right path and if this is good. And I ended up just kind of, well, I mean, I did improv in that way and I did just kind of like, and I do this I am sort of proud of, I did just follow the fun. I just followed what was fun and there was definitely times where it was like any sort of rational person looking at the data would have said, you're not making a wise decision. Like in terms of stability and your future, this not making a wise decision. Like in terms of stability and your future, this is not a wise decision.

But I was always like, eh, let's see what happens, you know? Yeah, you want to try different things. Yeah. And you have your background, you have your training, and you want to try things. I think we all have to do that. Yeah. Do you still have a lot of Texas in you, do you think?

When I just sit on my daughter's arm, yes, definitely. No, no, but I mean, because I consider myself forever a midwesterner. A Swedish farmer. Yeah, yes. I've heard you say that. Yeah, yeah, apron wearer. That's what I just feel like I come from generations

of apron wearers and for some that are either covered with flour or guts. That makes me think of Texas, actually. Yeah. Yeah. And I mean, and that's because there is like a Texas identity, which is sort of a, you know, a stalwart individualistic kind of thing. And do you have that? Well, Texas is huge, right? Yes. kind of thing and do you have that? Well, Texas is huge, right? And you're told that all your life and you are really deliberately,

you are imbued with a sense of being a Texan from birth. Absolutely, don't mess with Texas all over the place. But you know what that was? That was a glitter campaign. Oh really? And I remember when it came out. Well people certainly have perverted it. I know, they have, perverted it. I know.

They have. But it was about don't throw your stuff out the window because Lady Bird Johnson started the highway beautification program there. And the highways are very beautiful there. So it was sort of like, don't throw your junk out. So it looks like it's something else, but it's that. But also Texas does give off a vibe very much like don't mess with Texas. Yeah.

But do you know who Lawrence Wright is? He wrote, he's got a book out now called Mr. Texas that is so good. And Stephen Weber reads it and he has so many Texans who live in him. I was shocked. Yeah. So happy for him. Is it a novel? It's a novel, but Lawrence Wright also wrote The Looming Tower, which was on Netflix. And he's a Pulitzer Prize-winning journalist that writes for The New Yorker, but he moved back to Texas. He's

from Austin. And he wrote in this great article called, I think, God Bless Texas. A few years ago, he wrote it for either New York magazine, no, The New Yorker. And in it, he sort of says, if Texas goes blue, the whole country will go blue. And actually, Texas has the numbers to go blue. And that's just facts. But he describes Texas in this great way. He says, there's an AM Texas and an FM Texas. And I grew up very much in the FM Texas,

but with a lot of AM Texas people too. But there's definitely two things that coexist. And maybe that can be good for balance, but right now, I think there's a lot of voter suppression, to be honest. No, it's a lopsided time. And I had my ex-wife's sister moved out of Texas because of the changes that they started to make to public schools. Like changing the public school books to just,

I mean, look it up. No, I'm aware of it. And also, I talked to this woman who was running for Congress. I didn't even look it up to you, I meant to the listeners. I don't need to look it up. Look it up And also, you know, I talked to this woman who was running for Congress. I didn't look it up to you. I mean, to the listeners. I don't need to look it up. Look it up right now. I know already.

Give me your research, Perry. Okay. No, the, there's a woman that was running for Congress. It's this district that runs along the, you know, we're Padre Island and Galveston. I think it's like over a hundred... Down south on the Gulf. Yes, on the Gulf of Mexico. And it's, I think it like over a hundred miles long, this district. And you know, it's right on the ocean. So they feel all the effects of climate change and everything. And she was running for Congress during the pandemic, teaching second grade in the classroom and online and running for Congress. You know, she, she, she's, I really like her so much and she's a wonderful educator.

But she, I said, when you say voter suppression, like how does that play out? What does that mean? Because I couldn't figure out what she meant. She goes, well, you have to register a certain amount of weeks before you can vote in this state. So they'll say, okay, you have to be there by 7 a.m. on a Tuesday to make sure that you are registered.

But that could be like 40 miles away from your house and you're trying to get to work on a Tuesday. Yeah, yeah. So that, you know, I don't, when people hear voter suppression, I had never thought of those kinds of complications. Yeah. But that's what's going on. Yeah. And also this sort of idea that, you know, you don't need to vote. Yeah.

Just that sort of permeates. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, no, it is. It's also, to me, I always think it really is showing. When you try and vote or suppress, you're really showing your hand that like, you know, yeah. Like, and it all, you know, and it's like, well, hey, don't, there's so many things about the world today that I just feel like, and I mean, I remember there was,

I think it was a book or something, what I learned as a kindergartner kind of thing. And it is kind of a good litmus test, like the notion of, like, I'm just amazed at so much of what we hear is a problem from the right wing is basic, it's like things that you would just say, well, you're talking about sharing. You're talking about sharing. And you're saying sharing is a bad thing. Well, you're talking about roads and the highway beautification program. You're talking about,

which is the greatest irony of all, you're talking about things that we share with each other, right? Hospital, roads. Right. Medicine. Medicine. Food. Yes. Shelter.

Exactly. And it's all like, I thought sharing was good. And the same thing, I thought cheating was bad. And inconveniencing a particular group of people because you don't like how they're going to vote, that's just cheating. You're cheating and you don't care? The answer is no, don't care. You get into it because I speak for myself.

I came from a pretty conservative area. And to get to a place where people were, I mean, the way I look at it, like where there were Jewish people and queer people and people of color and Muslim people. And I needed to get out of there. And did you feel that same way? Or because is Dallas sort of cosmopolitan enough that you didn't feel sort of constrained like that? Dallas was cosmopolitan and is, and I felt like I was surrounded by people of all colors

and all walks of life, all religions, and my parents voted for Jimmy Carter, so I was in a household that was not, you know, was very open and welcoming and, you know, we were very liberal, I guess is the word. Yeah. and, you know, we were very liberal, I guess is the word. But once I got out into the world, and especially in theater and television, I was just so excited. I felt like I was in the right place. You know, I just get to meet, and people are so well informed, and you get to have these amazing conversations about all of these kinds of things. And you just keep growing and learning, and sometimes you find out you're wrong

and somebody else is right and that's okay too. Yeah, yeah, absolutely. You were doing mostly theater. When you started to do television, did you have a preference? I mean, did you feel one more than the other or did you feel like it was all kind of the same thing? Well, honestly, I started off in theater and I love, love, love it. And I wound up kind of in a regional theater as I did an internship in a regional theater. And thank God there's a lot of room here. Yeah.

Kelsey and I were doing an interview the other day and we even managed to get our hands up into the camera frame. Like, so we could really, you know, what the gestures did not match the point. Right, right, right. It's so funny. Photographers love that though. It's always like, get your hands in it, you know. I don't know how we did it. It's here.

But it's so funny. But I love theater, but I guess I just wanted a paycheck. I hate saying that, but I did. There's nothing, there's no shame in it. It's like, you don't, I feel like I didn't make the system. It says I got, you know, yeah, I gotta get this piece of paper with numbers on it in order to live. Yes. And when I was, when I got my equity card and started to really audition in New York, Madonna was doing Speed the Plow on Broadway. And Melissa Gilbert was doing

a Shana Maddall Off-Broadway. And I'm like, I gotta go to LA and either cut an album or get on a TV show. Put on a bullet bra, quick. There were no auditions. Yeah. So I came out here for that. Really, it was a dead time? You'd have one a month.

Or were there just stunt castings so much out there? I think that, I just don't think there were a lot of parts and there were a lot of people ahead of me in line. I remember Cynthia Nixon was doing, I remember seeing her on, there were a lot of great actors already working. And it was just hard to break in. So I came out here and I just immediately started auditioning

and just getting in the door felt so good, just preparing it. Yeah. And then there was a huge strike, but then once we got through that, I started to work a little and then it snowballed. And did you like living here versus New York? I did, cause it was more like.

More like Texas. Yeah, I mean you could drive your car to the grocery store, put your bags in there, and then just get them right. You know, you don't have, it's so hard. But I recommend it to everybody. You gotta go live in New York, especially if you're an artist of some kind.

You have to go and spend your time there. Yeah. You'll love it. When I was living in New York, I was living in Hell's Kitchen, and this was like 1990, 1991, something like that. And it did make my mother cry. She told me she cried all the way back

from dropping me off at my apartment on 46th Street. Really? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Because she was scared? Yeah, it was too much for her. Just it was all too much. And then when she did come back and visit us, it always, it's just too, you know, it's like if you're from a small town,

there's too much, just too much information and- Coming at ya. Yeah, it's a lot. I used to like forget how to use the phone. Like you'd go into New York City and you'd forget how to, you just forget everything because it was so overstimulating, totally. But when you mastered it and all of a sudden you knew

that you could walk a few feet before the light changed because you'd be okay. Like all those things that you pick up on that you lose after a month of not being there. But I remember going from Dallas to New York, and at DFW, Southwest would always say, if you'll go on the next flight, we'll give it to you free.

So we always went on the next, I mean, I don't think I ever paid for a flight, because I'd always just go on the next one or pay $80 or something. And then you'd get to New York and you'd share a cab with somebody. And by the time you got into the city, just the people walking around,

even at 11 o'clock or midnight, the characters, you just, the stark difference. It also makes you love your country because there's a little bit of everything, but it just always, I just always loved getting back to New York. I mean, I still love it. I'm used to living here though,

and I'm older and tired or so, you know. Yeah. But... I can't imagine raising kids, just the whole idea of school. My son was born there, so I got a stroller up and down subway stairs, and it was not, this is like,

there's nothing romantic about this shit. It was nice because people do help you. Like people will help you with the stroller and then just with kind of soundless wordlessly, just pick up the front end of the stroller and help you up the stairs and put the stroller down and leave. And then you check and your pearls are gone.

Or your baby. Yeah, or your baby. No, he's the same one, I'm pretty sure. But yeah, having kids there was too much, but I did always like, and when I would, after I left, and then would come back and would stay for like a week or two weeks for work or something, I did find in a couple of days, I was back into it. Like I, like, it didn't feel so stressful.

Like you get out on the street and it just feels like, kind of you feel this stress. And then after a while it's like, oh, you're just kind of used to it. You just drop into the flow of it. But yeah, I loved, I love the fact that, you know, you know, it is easy to get in your car and go to the grocery store.

But like, if you go to the corner there, you're gonna, you'll see like five little stories unfolding in front of your eyes. You know? So openly. Yeah. Because of the anonymity. Yeah.

But I had a great, you know, when I moved there from Texas, I was, you know, my mom had always gone to do, she was a model, like a showroom model, and she'd go do markets there. And so, you know, and that was before, it was right around the time of the I Love New York campaign. So, you know, it's when things were, they needed a boost,

right? So when I went to New York, I lived down in Tribeca. I had a loft, but the loft was, it was kind of a disaster. So I couldn't stay there. So because I, like, there was no way to call the elevator. You had to lean out and pull it up yourself. My friend got it. My friend got it when. Like on a rope? Uh-huh.

Oh wow. And it was a freight elevator and it's like had 13, it had like live electricity running through it. It wasn't finished. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But my friend had gotten. It was a true loft. Yes, back in the day.

So my mom's friend came and said, "'Perry, I think you should come stay with me. "'This is the five Ds. "'It's dirty, it's dark, it's disgusting, it's dangerous, "'and it's dingy.'" She was trying to convince me to get out of it. Right, right. She probably had three more Ds

if she just had given it some time. At least. Yeah, yeah. I... So I went to her place, which was on this, in this high rise by the UN school, what, I'm trying, Waterside Plaza. It's right by the- On the east side, yeah.

On the east side, right on FDR. Yeah. And she said, if you want to stay, you know, here's the rent. And so I did want to stay because it was safe. It felt safer than the lofts. It scared me a little bit. Yeah. It was right by the Odeon, but that was the only thing there. So why am I starting telling this story? Oh, so my mom came up to visit and there was a car service in the

bottom floor of the building. And it was really far to walk to the subway and I was terrified of the subway. So I was trying to figure out what to do and I kept taking the car service. That was my splurge. And my mom's like, you gotta stop doing that. You have to. So, this one driver would drive us around a little bit and then about a month later my mom got really, really, really sick and was in the hospital. And so, about a week into that, I got this call in Dallas and it was this driver. And he goes, Perry, I've missed you and your mom. And Irene told me that your mom was in the hospital. I just want to call and tell you we're saying a prayer.

This guy that drove us around New York. Wow. And, you know, a couple of times and I just was like, okay, I'm in love with New York forever. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, because it does seem on the outside, it does seem so... Scary. ...aggressive and scary, but then you find, you know...

Everyone. Most people are really, really great people. When you're sort of, you know, developing your own identity as an actress, you know, because you're so great in Frasier and so perfect as a comedian, were you doing a lot of comedy? Did you, were you drawn to it? Andy, that's the nicest thing you could have said to me, especially coming from you. Oh, well, thank you.

I mean, you're welcome. I mean, you know. Thank you. No, I mean, you're welcome. I mean, you know. Thank you. No, I mean, I mean it. It's a pure, I don't, I do not butter people up on here because it, I listen to other podcasts and it's like, I'm always like, look, all these people know they're great, you know? Like, you don't, like, it's like, you know, one, one person that's enjoyed a lot of success telling another person that's enjoyed a lot of success, like, you are so great. I'm like, yeah, yeah, we know, we know, that's why

we're listening to you while we're driving around in our cars. But yeah, no, but you, I mean, you just, there's just, you know, line after line. And in prep for this, just as like a little shortcut, I just kind of looked up some of Roz's best ones. And there's just so many, such good, good, perfect, perfect. And not just like perfect delivery of jokes in a way that probably surprised the writer. You know what I mean? Cause like when you write a joke, you have it in your head.

And I've found like on the Conan Show, we would cast people, and you just hoped that they could give you... somewhat near the full amount of funny that you thought was there. And then there were people that would give you, make you see it as a funnier than you had intended it to be. And I feel like you did that so much on that show.

But anyhow... Thank you. You're welcome. Did you... than you had intended it to be. And I feel like you did that so much on that show. But anyhow. Thank you. You're welcome. I mean, were you happy to be part of a comedy? Oh my God. Yeah? Yeah.

I mean, I always thought I was gonna be like, baby Madea, I studied theater to be a dramatic. Yeah, yeah. Most actresses do, I think. And most actors, I think people get in, when you say the theater, you don't, you know, unless you're like musical theater, you're not thinking. Right, you're not thinking of what was the great,

you know, the Monty Python show on Broadway, the Spamalot. Oh, Spamalot, yeah, yeah. You know, laughter, roaring laughter. Yeah. You know, maybe once or something. Right. But so, yeah, yeah. You know, laughter, roaring laughter. Maybe once or something. But so yeah, totally. I never really thought, I didn't study comedy.

I have always been a clown. I mean, I've always been, you know, loved to laugh with my friends. I'll do that first. But then I did, it was really funny because I got this little play here in LA and I lived in West Hollywood but I had to drive to, oh my God, they'd say the address in a commercial all the time, a cornflower or something.

I had to drive like to Long Beach to rehearse in somebody's apartment. And we did the play at that theater where, on Pico, where the baseball play was for years and years and years. I know I'm not being very, but we did the play on Sunday and Monday nights, on their dark nights. And it was a terrible play, and there were only four of us, but the guy that directed it was a professor, and he taught me how to do comedy.

I know that. In what way? Just he taught me the rhythms of comedy. I know that. In what way? Just he taught me the rhythms of it. He just sort of said, things like go up at the end, basics, but that don't always work. And there are no rules really, but there are a couple of ways you can try it. Yes.

And then you make it real. And then you develop an instinct. Yes, yeah. But it was just doing that. And Jeff Greenberg actually came to the play. He and Sheila Guthrie, I think, came to the play and they were like, there were only two other people there. There were more people on stage than the audience.

But he never told me that for a long time. He didn't tell me that. Oh, that he had seen you in that? Oh, wow. Why didn't he tell you that. But he- Oh, that he had seen you in that? Yeah. Oh, wow. Why didn't he tell you that? Because it was so embarrassing. Oh, because he knew the play was shitty?

Yeah, oh, it was horrible. It was horrible. But it was great. It was a, I, and then I produced a play at the Tiffany with my friend Neil Lerner. We produced a play by Richard Greenberg called The Moderati. And we got Ron Link to direct this,

and I don't think you know who he is, but he was a brilliant comedic stage director. And he took it from there. I mean, he really taught me and directed me, but also just taught me through direction, what worked and what didn't, and just to be in front of an audience. And when I was a kid,

I did a lot of classes at the Dallas Theater Center, and we'd usually write our own plays. And then an audience would come at the end of the year. And I remember my first play was, it was a Greek, so we did it in a Greek style. So I was one of the household gods, and I named myself Brutabeth. And I was really mean to the person that was,

it was sort of like Laurel and Hardy, I guess, you know? And so, I just, the first time I ever heard anybody, you know, it's the old story, the first time I ever got a laugh, I was in for life. You know? But I also, my husband just always goes, just don't cry, just don't cry. Because when I do a dramatic part, I tend to cry. Oh, really?

Yeah, that's inconvenient if you're, you know? He goes, just don't do it, don't touch yourself to cry. Oh, really? Yeah, that's inconvenient if you're... You know? He goes, just don't do it. Don't touch yourself and cry, okay? Yeah, yeah. Um, did that sort of give you an itch to then do comedy as opposed to drama or, you know? I like them both. But I prefer comedy.

There's nothing like going to work and laughing on it. And laughing at everybody else, you know? Yeah, and especially once you get on something that's as good as Frasier was, and that has, you know, every cylinder, you know, like everybody on that show, even the goddamn dog. Yeah, even the dog.

It's like the dog was fantastic. So it is like, that's such, like you're just so lucky to get, because you're lucky to get in something, you're lucky to get in something, and then you're even more lucky to get in something successful. And then when you get in something that's successful and good, because there's lots of successful things that are not so good. That was the whole thing to be so proud of it.

Yeah. You know, and everyone that did it, like all the writers and all the people involved in it, everyone was just at the top of their game. Yeah. And they were having, it was a blast to go to work. And it still is. Yeah, is it?

Yeah. Going back to it, was it an easy thing to go back? Like when people came to you to say, where you're this, oh yeah, yeah. Cause I mean, obviously you mentioned it before, there's money on the table there. So that's like, okay, yeah, sure. But also you do have to wanna do it for the fun of it again

because the money, I can't imagine the money's the main thing. You know? No, because you have to live, you know, especially after, at a certain point, you have to live with, you have to live with what you're doing. So. Yeah. But no, Kelsey's producing and he's very, very, very much involved. And I know what

he wants for that character. I know what he wants for himself. I know how good he is. Yeah. And so no, and once I got to the set and started watching him in the middle of it all, directing and acting and doing everything, I was very nervous before I started rehearsing. But once I saw him doing his thing at Paramount, on the set, you know, kind of going back in time, I felt like I could do it.

Yeah. And that it would be fun. Yeah, yeah. Was there a time when, because, and again, I'm speaking from my own experience. I was on the Conan show, the original late night show for seven years, and then I definitely reached a point where I was like,

I wanna show that I can do something else. And I also wanna show that I can be sort of more in the front of someone else. And did you reach a point where you kind of felt like that? Where you're sort of like, I love the success that I've been blessed with, but I want to, you know, I want there to be something more. I want to showcase myself doing something more.

Yeah, yeah, of course I would love that, but I just haven't found that yet. Yeah. You know, I haven't found, and it hasn't found me. Yeah. Yeah, of course I would love that, but I just haven't found that yet. I haven't found that, and it hasn't found me. And I kind of got sidetracked. Well, after Frasier ended that year, there was a lot of reality shows and things like Fear Factor, those kinds of things. Yes, no, they pummeled the, you know,

fictional showbiz television business. All of a sudden it was, you know. It was not, there was nonexistent, from being so dirty on the air to being like two. Yeah, yeah. But then also the, so many things shot out of town and I was offered things, but I had two babies that I had engineered onto the planet

and I just could not leave them. I couldn't drag them around, you know, and so I... And you had them right at the end. They were born Friday and the last episode aired on the next Thursday. Wow. Yeah, it was just right at the end. Yeah, yeah.

Yeah, so you didn't, yeah, it is convenient though because you did have something to take your mind off the fact that the show is over. Totally, totally. In fact, in the next August, my husband called to check on us, you know, from work and I go, I was crying, I go, why would God do this to these poor babies? How would he give them to me? I'm the worst, I'm the worst. And he goes, Perry, what is today?

And I go, I don't know, Monday. Well, what's the date? August? I don't know, ninth, I don't know, Monday. Well, what's the date, August? I don't know, ninth. I don't know what it is, why? Well, because what have you done the last 11 years around this week? You know, and I went, oh, back to work.

Yeah. Oh. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha. And so you think you were just felt like an instinctual. Oh, oh, oh. Yeah, like I hadn't, I was so distracted during the last, David Hyde Pierce had a little tear every day. He would really like mark it,

like this is the last time we're gonna do this, and this is the last time we're gonna do that. And I would be like, nothing was coming in, I had two babies coming. And so then that's when it hit, like a tidal wave. Wow. I wanna touch on, because I mean, in my notes and in reading about you,

you have, you've really, you've experienced a lot of loss. Like a lot of people close to you have died, especially from cancer. And I just, I don't know if you wanna talk about like, what effect that has had on every aspect of your life, because it has to, you know, until you really kind of experience the loss of somebody, which it's not, I mean, it's, you'd think it's common,

but it's not that common, you know? I mean, you get to a certain age and then yeah, that sort of happens, but it is like, you know, most people don't have to deal with it as much as you have and I'm wondering, you know, what it's sort of done to you or for you. I don't know how to answer that. I mean, I... It's a terrible question.

No, it's not. No, it's bad. Well, you know, my mom was sick with cancer for about 15 years. Wow. And I was at the Perry Street Theater as an assistant stage manager. And I got the call that she was in the hospital from our pastor. Like I had to go to a pay phone and call him back. He found me through my roommate, the woman that said come look. Yeah, yeah.

And I don't even know how he found me. And so my mom had checked herself into the hospital and she was, finally they were able to figure out what was wrong though. She'd been in terrible pain for about four years. So it had started four years before that and they couldn't identify it because it was Lyomyosarcoma, which is a very rare form of cancer.

And what kind, what is it? It was in her spine. Oh, wow. So when they gave her a CAT scan, it sort of closed her spine because it straightened it up, you know, and so it was in her spine. Oh, wow. So when they gave her a CAT scan, it sort of closed her spine because it straightened it up, you know, and so it was in her cord. So it was, her spine was kind of squeezing her spinal cord. And she looked at the doctor and said, I'm dying, I'm going, I feel my body shutting

down. So they knew, you know, they were able to identify it because she just happened to go on a Friday night and get a cat skin in an emergency room. Wow. So then, you know, they gave her like six months to live, but she said, you're crazy. Now that I know what this is, I'm going to do this, this,

this, she just had the greatest attitude. Yeah. It was about a month before her 42nd birthday. You know, so she was young and she was healthy. Other than that. That is so young. I know, so she was young and she was healthy, other than that. That is so young. I know, it's so young and horrible. And she was like my bestie.

So I did everything I could to be with her and to help her and to, and she was great. Like when it was a normal day and she didn't have a problem, we didn't talk about it. Yeah. And so she, so then when she was out here for like the last few months, and then she was

with me and then she left and that was horrific, but I was right, I was in the fifth year of Frasier. All of, I'd come in and like David Hyde Pierce would be sitting next to the bed talking to her with, you know, some soup that Brian had made, you know, and they'd be talking and Jane and Marshall were always there and Kelsey was there. You know, everybody was there for me and I felt very, I felt very, you know, I felt like I was part of a family. Yeah. And I know that sounds corny, but I really was. They were very caring. It does happen. But I did some interview during the time and talked so so

lovingly about all of them that the writer called me a Moony. He said, she's practically a Moony. And I'm like, I am, I am. Wow. To your face? Yeah, in print. He didn't know what was going on at home. So I think he probably would have gone easier on me

if he'd known where I was coming from. But it was, so that was amazing. And to have that kind of support and for her too because you know she also loved this business you know so she wanted to be part of it so much and in a strange way she was very loved and then my sister died of the same thing and then my little sister passed away and then my brother passed away this past summer of glioblastoma. Like he had 14 months from the time it was found, you know. So, to answer your question, I really don't have, it's like a being, it's a different plane. You just can't believe it. Yeah.

And I mean, there's gotta be anger and frustration about it. There is. Yeah. I don't think I've gotten to that yet, but yes, I totally agree. I probably should, you know, it's just the, it's like a numbness right now. I think I'm numb.

Yeah. Is it fear? I mean, because cancer is just such a monster, such a lurking monster. Yeah, but I don't, I don't, yeah. I guess so. Are you vigilant about like making sure that every, you know, you get checked up and all that?

Yeah, I am. Yeah, I am. And I always have been. Because my mom was, started getting sick so early and I always take those appointments very seriously. Yeah. Did her being sick for so long, and I don't mean this to sound glib, but did it make it kind of easier when she passed because you had had enough time to kind of, but because

I just, the people that I've lost, like you do get a chance. Like my aunt, my mom's older sister who lived out here and I ended up taking care of towards the ends of her life, but she died during COVID. So nobody at home in Illinois got to kind of be there with her. And when I took her ashes back to Illinois after the world opened up

and I just saw everybody grieving and I was struck by like, oh yeah, I've already done all that. Like it was, I was like just seeing my brother and sister and my mother cry about it. I just, it was, I was like, oh, I'm, and not that I was blasé, but I had literally months and months and months

of ramp up to that. And I just wonder, you know. Well, when my first, the first sibling that passed away, I don't mean to, but it was like, it was so shocking because we were coming back from a trip. My nephew had been texting me during this entire trip and about coming to visit us. And so we just got off the plane and we had to go through customs and we were coming back up PCH. It was a beautiful day and I called him and I said, what's up? You know, and he goes, my mother is okay.

And his mother was the one with Lymeo sarcoma. Yeah. But he goes, you know, Aunt April's no longer with us. And it was just such a shock. Yeah. Because it was just such a shock. Because she was young. And so I just remember, I mean, I don't think I've ever gotten over the shock.

And then my sister, Patty, who had Liomio, died during COVID, which is very much the same kind of experience you had. And then my brother, I was able to be with and go back and see him and spend time with his family. Yeah. Several times. Yeah.

I imagine it does give you that sort of, the imperative to really live every second, you know? Absolutely. Do you feel that intently? Yeah, I was also the oldest of four of all of us. And so I feel like it's almost like it has a different feeling than just siblings. Right, right. It's pretty intense.

Yeah. Well, I mean, you seem to, I don't know, I don't know, you seem to be handling it like with aplomb, you know. But you seem to be handling it like with aplomb, you know, I mean, you're- Well, I went through different, you know, I didn't handle the first one very well. It was pretty much a mess. And then COVID was just, as you said, it was just so during that whole time that we couldn't get,

she was in hospice and we couldn't get to Dallas and we couldn't go in there and risk exposing a bunch of people in hospice to sure It was just such a strange time and then my brother My brother has two boys that one just graduated from high school. Mm-hmm. And so going and spending time with him was really Great we had not I mean it was great to be with him and be there and see how they were taking care of him and see how, seeing how loved he was by his family and how, you know, you know, I don't, how do you process any of that? Probably major therapy would be a good idea.

Yeah, yeah. Is that not, do you do therapy? No. I have. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, no, I don't go to the gym, but I talk to that guy every goddamn week. Um, well, what's in store for you? What, I mean, what do you, what's in your future? Are there things that are undone that you've got,

you know, plans for? Or is it kinda, are you just happy right now to have the show back? And is that sort of an open-ended run? Yeah, if it is. I mean, it hasn't been picked up, so we'll see. I mean, I'd love to- It'll get picked. I mean, come on.

Well, you know, you don't wanna take anything for granted. I know, I know, I know. But I mean, I can say, I know you can't say it, but I can say, no, it's getting picked. You know? Yeah. I think you'll be able to do but I can say, no, it's getting picked. You know? I think you'll be able to do that as long as everybody wants to, you know? That would be awesome.

Yeah. It seems like it's going well. I mean, it's really fun to watch something take shape like that and watch the new cast bring it, you know, and watch the writers bring it and everybody meet in the middle and figure all those things out. And then the idea, I think Kelsey's vision of

bringing people in from All the shows, you know people just coming in and doing their thing. Yeah, really fun especially with I mean it's just over and he he One of the great things about Frazier was we all were in these There was a long hallway that went to this green room and off the hallway were these tiny little dressing rooms that Cheers, the cast of Cheers had occupied before us. So we felt a real responsibility and a real, you know, to this, you know, we couldn't, we had to be good because they were so good. And John would always sit at the end of the hall, John Mahoney, and we'd all sit in this green room and just talk and tell stories. It was like the deli scenes from Broadway Danny Rose, just a bunch

of people telling their war stories. But with love and, oh my God, did you hear that? Oh, what happened to him? Everyone just really lovingly telling these stories and then guest cast would come in and they'd join in. Yeah. And everybody wanted them to feel comfortable so that they could do what they needed to do to do a good job because that just was great for the show. And we, you know, I always knew that we were like that, but watching Kelsey kind of create that again, it really has reinforced the idea to me that he, it kind of comes that again. It really has reinforced the idea to me that it kind of comes from him. He has a real, he's really great at this.

He's really great and not, he's a great actor, but also he's a great leader, great producer of a show. He really knows how to make everybody feel comfortable and loved and do your thing. Yeah, that's super important. And I, you know, and it, I mean, I did, the thought occurred to me, did Frasier spoil you for other workplaces a little bit?

In some ways, in some ways, of course, of course, but I've had fun on other jobs. I've had great fun, but I missed that, that tight knit, you know, and the, and also we got to just, you know, I've had great fun. But I missed that tight knit. And also we got to just, in sitcoms, you're all there together for the same amount of time. People aren't coming and going like they are on single camera. And so, if you don't have much to do, you're stuck.

But if you've got a lot to do, it's even more fun. Yeah. But yeah. Yeah, because it is like, and you do learn how top down things can be and how from, you know, that number one, whether the showrunner, whether the director, whether the number one on the call sheet, like, they set the tone. And, and I have worked in places where they do not want to accept that responsibility, or they're ignorant of it.

And it's tragic because this job can be so fun. And all it takes is a little bit of like, I don't even, it's not even effort, it's just attitude. It's a sensibility. Yeah. Just like the idea of like, if I'm an asshole, it's going to ruin everybody's day. So I better not be an asshole, you know?

Yeah, and also people are doing things that, you know, they're kind of showing you their heart and their soul and you know, their underbelly. And so you want things to be comfortable. Yeah. You know, and, but you know, on a sitcom, that's a little easier because you've got, you know, a soundstage and dressing rooms,

and you know, you've got a big stage, everyone can come and watch. It's a little easier when you get into single camera. It's a little more complicated, but it's well worth it, I think. But I've been working on a project about someone that I'm very, very love, and I can't say anything else, but I've been working on it for like 10 years, and I'm going to make that happen. All right. Well, good. Good. That's great And it doesn't have to be showbiz related,

but what do you think it would be? Oh my God. Or like what advice, you know, like often it takes the form of advice that, you know, to give people advice. Yeah, I mean, I think it's be kind. Yeah. You know, and recognize it when you get that from others, you know, return it.

Yeah. And then also, you know, remember that it's a business, like not just show business, but probably any time you're at work, you're part of a business, and, you know, that's a big thing to learn to be aware of and to, you know, make a contribution to and realize that what you're bringing is either taking away from the business or bringing something to the business. And then when you leave business and you leave your work, go home and have a great time and enjoy your family. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, that is good. Yeah, that last one's easier said than done sometimes. Yeah. But it certainly is worth trying because there are times, and especially, you know,

like as you get older and as you do more stuff, you realize like so many things, as you do more stuff, you realize like so many things, like so many things that I would go home frustrated about when I was 35. I wouldn't even be thinking about them by the time I got to my car. Yeah. They'd be just like, well, that's bullshit. I don't care about that. So yeah, those are good ones. Well, Harry, thank you so much for coming in.

Oh, thank you. Andy, I'm going to answer that question every night and every day in my car. I'm going to call you with another answer every day. We can add it on here. We can add it on here. I actually have had guests that like, hey, can I record something? Yes. Yes. Well, thank you so much, Perry. And everybody check out the new Frasier. It's very funny. And it's going to run. Yeah, I mean, you don't have to everybody check out the new Frasier. It's very funny and it's going to run. Yeah, I mean, you don't have to check it out soon because it's going to run for centuries. Maybe. Yeah, it will. Don't worry. And thank all of you for listening to this episode

of The Three Questions. I'll be back next week with more. Goodbye. The Three Questions with Andy Richter is a Team Coco production. It is produced by Sean Daugherty and engineered by Rich Garcia. Additional engineering support by Eduardo Perez and Joanna Samuel. Executive produced by Nick Leow, Adam Sachs, and Jeff Ross. Talent booking by Paula Davis, Gina Battista, with assistance from Maddy Ogden. Research by Alyssa Grahl. Don't forget to rate and review and subscribe to The Three Questions with Andy Richter wherever you get your podcasts.

And do you have a favorite question you always like to ask people? Let us know in the review section. Can't you tell my love's a-growing? Can't you feel it ain't a-showin'? Oh, you must be a-knowin'. I've got a big, big love. This has been a Team Coco production. Oh, you must be a knowin' I've got a big, big love