The Three Questions with Andy Richter - Sona Movsesian: Rock & Roll Stories (The Andy Richter Call-In Show)

Episode Date: August 29, 2025

Sona Movsesian joins "The Andy Richter Call-In Show" this week to hear your ROCK & ROLL STORIES! Sona and Andy discuss their experience on the "The Legally Prohibited from Being Funny on Television Tour," Sona's formative crush on Slash, and much more.Want to call in? Fill out our Google Form at BIT.LY/CALLANDYRICHTER or dial 855-266-2604 with whatever you want to discuss! This episode previously aired on SiriusXM’s Conan O’Brien Radio (ch. 104). If you’d like to hear these episodes in advance, new episodes premiere exclusively for SiriusXM subscribers on Conan O’Brien Radio and the SiriusXM app every Wednesday at 4pm ET/1pm PT.

Conan O'Brien Radio Conan O'Brien Radio. This is the Andy Richard Collin' show. Once again, the height of professionalism. Steve Agee was advertised to be on here, but he got sick. Those peacekeeper, peacekeeper people, peacemaker, those peacemaker people have been running him ragged.

You nerds, you're killing him. No, he got sick and so he couldn't be here. But, I mean, you know what? I traded up. Fuck you, Steve Agee. Yeah, fuck you. Fuck you, Steve Agee and your sickness. Yeah.

I got Sonam Obsessi in here. Yeah, your little bitch getting sick. I'd be here with a fever. right I'd be here absolutely yeah you'd be pukin if you had you know whatever yeah bleeding whatever oh give a shit yeah fuck it got to do this calling show it's important it's all important oh my god um so today we're going to talk rock and roll stories now you can give us a call at 855 266 2604, and we will put you on. You don't even have to have rock and roll stories.

Just any rock and roll story? Yeah, any rock and roll. You know what? We've got to have topics. Yeah. So, you know, they, and we're, they get thin sometimes. You know what made me feel super rock and roll? The tour we went on in 2010.

Didn't that feel so rock and roll? It definitely felt like, okay, this is what it's like. Yeah. And even like it was a night, for people who don't know what we're talking about, In between our short-lived tenure on the Tonight Show and the TBS show, there was a period of time where Conan was contractually, like, forbidden from being on the air anywhere. So he did a live show largely, I think, to keep, well, to keep him from driving his family crazy, number one. And number two was to keep the band paid because the band, the band weren't covered by the same kind of contract. that a lot of us were.

That's true. So it got the band paid and we were out for, was it two months, three months? I can't even remember. It's all a blur. I think it was two months. I think it was like April to June. So it was a live show with music and sketches and silliness and lots of guest stars in lots of different places.

There's actually Conan O'Brien can't stop a documentary about it, which is a really interesting movie. It's a great movie made by his friend Rodman. Lender. But yeah, we did that. And, and there, it was fancy, though. It was. Like, it wasn't, like, shitty traveling. And we only had to, like, I only had to sleep in a bus like a couple of times. Yeah. Whereas the crew slept in the bus all the time. But we would sort of, like, fly from place to place and then stay in hotel rooms. Although even that, and they were nice hotel rooms. Yeah. There were times where I would just, there'd be rush, rush, rush, all day.

you know like oh we gotta get here now wait here for a while now get on here now get on this bus now get on this van no get on this plane no get on this bus and then i'd get to the hotel room and just be like oh fuck it's another empty hotel room and feel like crying it was like all of that for this you know it was it was it was weird well we had gust brand who was our tour manager who also tour manages he's been the longtime tour manager of the foo fighters and weezer and weezer and i think just in besee But I have to double check that. But he does it. He's like a legend. And then we were with a road crew, like these guys who go on the road professionally all the time. As close to pirates as you get these days. Honestly. I'm not kidding.

I'm not kidding. That's true. And it is a strange life. It's a strange life. I mean, they spend most of a year sleeping on a bus. Yeah. You know, in fact, there's a bus. The bus that is just bunks and no, I think they call that a slave ship.

Oh, my God. I think that's like the nickname for the one that's just, because some of them, there'll be like a few bunks and then a back bedroom for the big shot. Yes. And then a front little sitting area. And, you know, it's full of snacks. And it's fucking awesome. It's nice.

But the bunks are, I did find that the bunks were like, I'm about 6-1, 6-2, and they're about 5-11. So I was like... And they're like coffins. It was, yeah, it was pretty cramped. Yeah. I did not sleep well on the bus. No, me neither.

But I had so much fun. But I think that at the, like, the mark where it's where we're two weeks away from finishing. Yeah. I could tell everybody was kind of losing their minds. And the road dogs, these guys who've been, who tour for a living, they were like, yeah, this usually happens around the mark, the two week mark. When there's two weeks left, everyone starts to unravel. Regardless of how long it is.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's like they just want to get home. It's like you want to get on solid ground. You just don't want to keep leaving. It was a lot, but it was fun. And I think that documentary that was shot, that Rodman shot, you called it the best video of a summer camp we could ever ask for or something like that. And it was the best description of it, I think, that I've ever heard.

It was a really fun adventure at a really strange. time in all of our lives to go from being on the tonight show to well we're losing the tonight show or walking away from the tonight show or whatever you want to call it yeah to then like oh oh okay we're in rehearsal halls i got where i should think up a bit to do for myself on the you know yeah and and then you know and yeah and then being at bonneroo at a fucking tent in bonneroo and things like that nuts and you were you were on stage the whole time too and there was like music guests and and I remember every morning we'd wake up and there was a sheet of paper that was pushed under the door and it was like you are in Seattle and this is our schedule for today because you forget

yeah and I was like this is what this is what bands do absolutely I'm basically you know bork I don't know why I thought of her of course you're bork I'm Nikki Minaj that's who I thought I was I was Nikki Minaj. Another thing, one thing I do remember about the tour, too, was that Conan was, like, it was such a crazy time for him. And, like, he lost, like, 20 pounds just in, like, adrenaline and, like, ODing on weird adoration from people. Because, you know, it's just like people, like, stop the bus on the way out

to just, like, and you go out and say hi to him. And it's just really, like, He was a folk hero for like a little while and it's like, it's like, wow. It was just strange because it's like we're talk show people. We're not like we're not a religious movement. But he was so into just giving the crowd what they wanted that twice because he would run around the crowd with a wireless guitar set up and play in the audience. And twice he stood on the railing of a balcony. with a 30 foot drop below in two different theaters he did this and stood there playing guitar

and I just I was like oh what the fuck I was it makes me angry it's like when you see your kids do something dangerous you know like it's just like you know what the fuck I happen to love you and you're doing something stupid yeah yeah yeah but that was a weird time for him yeah you know he moved his whole family out here for a show he thought he was going to host forever and then it didn't work out and then now all of a sudden he's on tour and also he had 60 or 70 people come with him yes that were like hey I put my kids in it I bought I sold and bought a house yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah I know but it worked out it did and that tour was a lot of fun and we all got to live out our rock and roll fantasies we did we did I got to know that if I were

in any kind of touring thing I would be a terrible alcoholic and weigh 600 pounds Yes Yes I drank every single night I had five meals Full meals a day

Everything was free And so I was just I went out of completely out of control Yeah because it's like oh there's no rules We're in rock and roll right now We're rock and rolling And I wasn't even in the tour I was support staff.

You were supposed to be working. I was administration. I wasn't even doing anything. What a weird time. You give me per diem and I turn into a different person. Well, that's the way it is. You know, you're supposed to. And you're supposed to also, the other thing you do is try and angle as, and I know just from years of production.

Your per diem, when I was a PA, we used to have a game to see who could spend the least of their per die. just by stealing food from the production you know getting other people to buy your drinks and then it would be like a contest like I only spent

$4 a day and that was on cigarettes Oh my God let's go to the phones we're looking for your rock and roll stories out there our number is 855-266-2604 and we're going to go first

to Bob from Mesa Arizona Hey Bob what's up. Hey, how's it going, Andy and Sona? Good. Hi. Very big fans of both you guys. It's really exciting to talk to you guys. Thank you. Oh, that's Sona's mic. If you're hearing that's squeaking, it's because Sona's mic is flopping. I did wonder what was going on. Ah, there we go. Thank you. All right. All right. The mic twirling is over. We're ready for your rock and roll story, Bob. Okay. Well, this is sort of slightly rock and roll adjacent because it's something that has

happened to me on tour with my band. Cool. This would have been in the fall of 2000, I guess. All right, I'm writing that down. I think when this happened, yeah. Fall 2000. Make sure you got, there'll be more detail. Okay.

But anyway, we're traveling, and we'd been a band for seven or eight years at that point. What kind of band? We've had our road. Give me a little bio. It's sort of a, I guess, a pop punk kind of, like a alternative punk band. I guess you can say, sort of. And are you doing this, or do you have day jobs? We definitely have day jobs.

But in this case, we were on a big, like, 60-day tour. I think we're open for less than Jake or something like that. Okay, cool. So we're actually playing good venues, and we had, we got signed to a record label, so we actually have a nice van. You know, it's 2000, and we have a 1997 van. So to us, this was a huge deal. It's only three years old.

Luxury. Yes. And we had a trailer. So we had a big 15 passenger, forward to Connolline, and a trailer. Nice. And so we had our tour routine down pretty well in terms of, you know, how late you stay up, how early you get up to drive. And I think we were in Kansas headed to play some shows in Chicago. And it's about 11 in the morning. And the situation in the van is we have one guy driving, we have a passenger. and there's three bench seats, and three of us are sleeping on these bench seats, and I'm directly behind the drivers. And we're not really worried about anybody falling asleep because

it's 11 in the morning. You know, we were up late, but we've done this plenty. And so I'm laying there, and the road starts getting really rough, and I'm getting shaken around. And finally, I got up, and I'm like, what the hell is going on? And we're going through construction, so I'm like, oh, okay, construction, no big deal, I guess. And I lay back down, but then about 30 minutes later, I'm getting shaken around again, a whole bunch. And I'm really getting rattled in my seat. So I get up to see what's going on. And I see that we are driving at about 75 miles an hour in the grassy median between opposing highway lanes. Wow. Oh, my God. And Mike, yeah, and Mike, the driver is asleep with his head on his shoulder. The passenger is asleep as

well and so we're just freaking out and you would think we'd start screaming but it was so quiet yeah uh well except for the loud noises of careening down the yeah yeah thumpa thumpa thumpa thumpa thumpa oh god yeah and so i think i finally said hey mike and mike says yeah i know so now he's awake but he's just staring he's he's kind of breaking but ahead of us we see that There's a giant concrete drainage ditch, like a big square one that we're headed straight for it, cut down into this median. Oh, my God. And everyone's frozen?

Everyone's, like, terrified. They're frozen? Yes. In fact, I remember turning around and I see my singer is in the very last bench seat. And I saw him sitting up and we're all just looking terrified. And he lays down and he told me later, he got up, he saw that we were heading, barreling towards this concrete drainage ditch and he said he just laid down

and waited for death. He was so sure we were going to die. Fucking drama queen. God damn singers. Singers, man. That's exactly what that is. Well, actually, it's probably the safest way to handle it, you know,

is like... Just accept your... Yeah, well, just lie down. Just lie down so that you're, you know, you don't get someone else flying through, you know, like decapitating you. I don't know. I would try to stop.

Stop the van. Well, yeah, but see, what I was worried, too, is that if you wake him too sharply, he might, you know, freak out, yeah, and swerve. So, yeah. So anyway, you continue, because we're on tins and needles here. Yeah, I know. I want to know what happened. Well, he's awake now, but everybody's just frozen. And, you know, we see the ditch coming, and I'm like, hey, Mike, and he's like, I know.

Now, later he told me he was afraid to slam on the brakes. because we're in kind of medium-length grass and it's kind of wet. And so he was afraid if he slammed on his brakes. We would skid. We've got a big trailer full of all our equipment. So what happens is we hit this concrete drainage ditch and the van goes flying in the air, dukes of hazard style, the trailer, the van, the whole thing. And it's one of the quietest things I've ever experienced.

As soon as we left the ground, it was nobody screamed. we were all just horrified. And then the van comes crashing down to the ground, didn't flip, didn't skid, just stopped. And everything's really quiet. And Mike, the driver, kind of not quite shrugs, but very matter-of-factly says, you know, I fell asleep.

What the fuck, Mike? Mike, what are we doing? Oh, is that what happened, Mike? Mike. Thanks, Mike. Yeah. I was wondering, I was going to fill out a comment card and say, Any idea what happened with that cement thing?

Is he, was he like the driver? Was that his job? Or is he part of the band? No, we would all, no, yeah, he's part of the, we're not big enough to have a driver. No, it's just the five of us. But so we would rotate with, you know, with driving. But so we all come flying out of the van,

Singer starts kicking the van because he's so angry about what's happened. Mike told me later that he just assumed we were all going to beat the shit out of him. And so he got out of the van and was like, okay, come on, yeah, let's, I deserve it. You know, he, he knew. And, uh, did you, but, you know, we were all okay. Did you beat the shit out of him? No, no, we're not like that. How did the trailer, how did the trailer make it over the, the culvert?

I mean, was it, it just kind of. Culver. It was a short enough. We have no idea, but I looked back, we all went back to look through the grass and there is, the agreed upon amount is, I think, is 35 feet where there were no tracks of any kind in the grass. Wow. Awesome.

So. That's terrifying. Years later when we sold that van. It was terrifying. Wait, you still drove it after that? It was drivable? Like it didn't, was it all fucked up? No.

Well, that's, yeah, absolutely. That's what's funny about it is we, well, we didn't only have a choice. You know, I don't, I remember we opened up the engine compartment and there was fluid all over, but it just turned out that thing that holds the windshield washer fluid had shattered. And that's what that was. But we started the van. It seemed to run okay. I think we drove to Omaha

and you know, we were careful, you know, just does it feel okay? And it seemed okay. Yeah. I guess shout out to Ford for making a pretty solid van that can do a 35 foot jump. I mean, the Ocone is pretty. She's a beast.

Yeah. I actually, I don't own that one, but I do still have one so um because i i'm a little loyal because we survived but we went to omaha some mechanics looked at it and they were like oh yeah your frame is fucked this is but we had to play in chicago at the cavalry metro that night so we were just like well let's just let's just trying to get to the show and so we did and then we found mechanics in chicago and i think it was 300 bucks and they replaced some uh i can't remember some kind of support bearing or some kind of shock thing yeah yeah yeah something in the front but they put it up on some

laser thing and determined that the uh the frame was not bent or anything and it was fine and years later when we broke up and we sold that van i just remember thinking whoever someone today is still driving around in a 1997 fort oconnelline who has no idea that it has been launched at some point yeah yeah Oh, man. We did that with my brother's 1973 Buick Century Coop. Oh. We knew there was a driveway way out in the country. There was like a sharp turn, you know, in a road.

And if you went straight off the road, you went down a very long driveway to a farm at the end of the driveway. And it was probably a six foot drop. And my brother just was flooring it. And we dukes a hazard with that, too. and the coming down is so like I mean because we were said to be six feet in the air and just bam you know and it drove away you know but it's like this that could I don't even think we took it in because I think we were too afraid of like telling our parents you know dukes of hazard must have ruined so many cars yes because it made you think you could fly and then your car would be okay and operable yeah but that's not how it works no no even like there was because I'm older the streets of San Francisco they there was a show and they would have car races all the time and they would consistently do one where they would crest a hill and the car would catch air as it crest of the hill no and that's happened to me before it's not fun like it's not like you don't want that to happen and it is very bad for the car and does it even save time it's always when someone's chasing someone it's not we're not saving time right exactly we're not doing anything good Let's shaving a second off.

Maybe. That's true. Wait, so did every show after that feel so much better because you were so close to death? I don't know. I don't know if we thought about it that way. We probably should have, though. But you know what? The funny thing is shortly, like that same day, I think while we're waiting for the garage in Omaha,

everybody in the band, not me necessarily, but everybody else was like, okay, we've all made a deal, right? we are not going to tell our girlfriends or wives about this right we're not going to tell anybody this happened and about an hour after that my girl my girlfriend at the time called me now my wife and um and i guess i must have sounded rattled because she was instantly like are you okay what's wrong something happened right what's wrong so i told her i didn't think it was that big of a deal and for the whole rest of the tour the band was all way more pissed at me for having told my girlfriend friend, what happened, then they were at the guy who fell asleep at the wheel and almost killed us all.

Wait, but why would they say you can't tell your, your, the wags? Why would they say that? I mean, I think that it's like a normal thing to just tell your, your partner that you almost got into an accident that could have killed you. I don't know. That seems kind of silly. I would say it's because you guys probably, that's what I thought too. You had punitive parents who you could, who you had to keep secrets.

from as opposed to because I you know like everybody falls asleep behind the wheel a case you're like it happens when you drive a lot everybody does I think if you drive on like long trips that you will have I remember one of my trips to or I was driving to L.A. from Chicago by myself in my Toyota pickup and I was in it was it was rush hour but it was like it was moving it was like 40 or 50 miles an hour probably around Albuquerque. yeah and I was driving and was and I knew I was drowsy and I fell asleep and then woke up and was still in traffic driving but I don't know whether I was asleep for two seconds or 20 seconds oh my god you know and it was just absolutely bone-chilling terrifying yes and I you know so I got off and and you know had some enchiladas somewhere and just kind of Got your secondly. Yeah.

And then got back on the road. But yeah, I've almost, I don't know why I was, but I don't know, it's so irresponsible. But yeah, but you,

I think that's why they didn't want us. Yeah. I think that's why they did not want us to, they don't want our, you know, partners to know that that kind of shit's what's happening out. Right.

Out on the road, you know. I guess it, I guess you do need to say, if you do do those off, go, hey guys, somebody help me out. I'm,

you know. Yeah. You know. If you're an van full of people. After that, we had a rule. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

After that we had a rule that there always has to be, passenger has to stay away to keep an eye on the driver. So that rule, though, does. So there always have to be two people away. It does encourage someone to be like, I'm sweepy and then never has to drive. That's what I would do. You know, like half an hour. Like, okay.

Oh, I'm so sleepy. I'm sweeping now. Oh, no. Get the drummer to drive. I can't do it anymore. I need to sweep. I need a nap now. Oh. Well, listen, Bob, I'm glad you're safe. Yep. We also, we're all okay.

All right. All right. Well, thank you so much for the call. Yeah, great talking with you guys. You too. Thank you so much. Thanks, Bob. 855-266-2-4 is the number here on the Andy Richter Call-in Show. I've got Sonam Obsessian. Hi. We're talking rock and roll stories. Can roll, baby. Next up, we got Jenny from Chicago. She's got a wild card call. Chicago.

Jenny. Hi, Andy. Hi, the chillest chum of all, Sona. Hey. I'm talking to you guys. Please don't talk about that show. I'm sorry, but I love Sona. I love you too.

Oh, good. I love you too, Jenny. So, Jenny, I guess you got a wild card for us, eh? I do. I do. My wild card is about, sleepwalking. About sleepwalking.

Yes. Okay, nice. So it kind of ties into the previous guy who somebody fell asleep in that one. Right, right. Sleeping danger. That's what our next topic should be. It should. There's a lot on that.

Right, right. So this is about 20 years ago, and I lived in a townhouse, two stories. And I had a roommate, but my niece was living with me for a while. And so I had let her have my house. bedroom and I had been sleeping on the couch downstairs on the main level. This particular evening, she wasn't home when I was ready to go to sleep. So I was like, well, I'm just going to sleep in my bed and she can sleep on the couch. However, I was in about when I had been sleepwalking some.

So anyways, what ended up happening was I was sleeping upstairs, used to sleeping downstairs. and I had gotten up to sleepwalk, and I fell down the stairs, bashed my face, broke my nose, ripped, my left nostril was split and, like, laying on the side of my teeth. However, it did not wake me up. What the fuck? I then went back and got back into my bed. I must have grabbed a towel because, The way that I woke up in the morning, my niece came into my room to get some clothes because her dad was coming to pick her up to take her somewhere.

And I rolled over and she screamed out, what the fuck happened to your face? And she thought someone had hit me with a baseball bat. And my roommate had come home after I had fallen probably, obviously, because she saw blood on the stairs, but she just was like she didn't know what was going on and had cleaned it up. And that's what we had discovered is that I had, so I'd walk in, broke my face. Oh, my God. That's a good, that's a good roommate. Find blood, clean it up.

Don't ask any questions. Yeah. That is right. I don't want to know, but I don't want the cops to find out. Where's the body? Let's go get rid of it. Let's take care of it. And then I got out the black light,

made sure all that spatter was gone. I like to think I'm that kind of friend. Yeah, my brother-in-law... Go ahead, you finish. I'm sorry, go ahead. Okay, so my brother-in-law was coming up to pick, coming to pick up my niece, so he was, we're just going to have him take me to the emergency room, and he's a different kind of guy, and he was like, didn't want to take me because he was afraid that they would think that he beat me up and take him to jail. Oh, good job. Way to be a man there, so we, right, we convinced him to take me, but as he's pulled.

pulling up to the emergency room bay, he didn't even want to stop all the way. He's like, just get out, get out, get out, get out. And made me go in there by myself. That's more suspicious. That's way more suspicious. There's cameras outside. If there's a guy pulls up and he has this woman come out who's battered. Right.

They're going to be like, who's that guy? What did he do to her? Was your niece with him? Yeah, she was the back seat. Uh-huh. Yeah. See, you go in and it's like, hey, she fell down the stairs. And then you got two other people.

or, you know, whatever. I mean, I guess. I don't know. Maybe it was him. Also, maybe when she was sleeping. Maybe he hypnotized you. Yeah, or maybe it was the niece.

Yeah, I don't know. Yeah, convenient that the niece wasn't there. That also sounds like maybe a fella that might hit somebody once or twice. I think so. Yeah. Is he still your brother-in-law? He is still my brother-in-law, yeah. Well, he's an asshole.

I'm kidding. No, that's what my sister told him he once for not going in with me. Yeah, yeah. She came to meet me at the hospital. She was like, he's an asshole. Had you slept walk like a lot in your life? So it was in my like mid-20s that how old I was when this happened. And they never, they, you know, the doctor's like, well, we're going to put you on Ambien

because maybe that'll stop it. and then I took an ambient one time and I couldn't even get to the bathroom. I was like crawling on the floor, so I never took that again. But I did, I would, my roommate would find me like cleaning the refrigerator in my sleep. Like I'd take everything out

and then I'd wipe down all the things and then I put everything back in. That's just efficient. I'd move shit around. She just never knew what was going to happen. So after this occurrence, we put a gate at the top of the stairs. Like you're a child.

Like you're a toddler. Or a dog. In my current home, In my current home, we also have a game at the top of the stairs because you just never know. Yeah, yeah. Wow. This isn't like Mike Burr-biglia's stand-up. Yeah, yeah.

The sleepwalk with me where he walked out of a window. Yeah. It's the same, because he also didn't wake up. Yeah. Why can't you wake up somebody who's sleepwalking? I don't know. Do you know, Jenny? I don't know.

I mean, I think it's kind of an old lifestyle or whatever. That's what I think, too. Yeah. But my roommate never did wake me up. And I don't sleepwalk anymore. knock on wood. Yeah. I'm going to right now.

But, yeah, it's, it was pretty bad. I mean, they, luckily, like, both my eyes were blood red and black after this. And then they thought I had broke my, I don't remember what that's called, but the bone around your eye. But luckily, all the xways that didn't happen. Nice job. Yeah, it was bad. Yeah. Oh, my God.

Really. Yeah. I had my daughter at the time. Yeah, go ahead. Go ahead. No, no, you go ahead. She was only five and had their dad for the weekend. So I had to send pictures so she would be prepared as to what I looked like when she,

I didn't want her to come home and see me that way and freak out. But when she did come home, she ran away from me screaming, crying because she was so upset about it. But that's my wild card sleepwalking story. People be sleeping. what did what did you tell people because I mean you obviously were probably messed up for a while did you tell them your brother-in-law beat you yeah but when I did go back to work on that Monday I did go to everybody's desk in the office I mean there's probably like maybe 30 people who worked there and I did go to everybody and say look I just want you to know this is what happened

nobody beat me up I fell down the stairs but I don't know I think people may have suspect that somebody did do it to me. I don't know. Right. But I sleep walking. That's what happened. Well, I think you should strap yourself down like Frankenstein when you sleep. Oh, that's a good idea.

Or like a werewolf. Yeah, big Velco straps. But if there's a fire, what if there's a fire or I live in tornado country? You know, it's tough it out. You got to be able to run to the basement. Right. Don't you want to be stuck on something? That's right.

If the bed goes airborne. Not if it takes your whole roof and everything away. You'll be like, yeah. You'll be like Dorothy from the Wizard of Oz. You never know where you're going to land. All right, Jenny, thank you so much for the call. I'm glad you're better.

And stay in bed, please. Okay, and thank you so much. This is the greatest thing ever just talked both of you. Oh, that's really cool. Have great things. Thank you. Thanks, Jenny. All right, next up.

She's sleepwalking. I always think of stepbrothers when that happens. Yeah, yeah. Sorry, I'm just talking. Yeah, I don't think I've ever slept walked. I'm so, or been had experience with anyone that sleptwalk. Do you talk in your sleep? Sometimes.

I do all the time. But not much. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It usually is like, it's like mumbly. Like I've been told like, like I'll have like a dream where I'm yelling and they're like, hmm, you know, like that. Like a dog. Yes.

But I've never, I don't think I've been, you know, nobody has ever told me that they've heard me, you know, saying like, you know, our love is a lie or anything like that. Oh, shit. Oh, no. Oh, I don't know what that meant. I think, I was thinking of, thinking up song titles. David from Vancouver got an international call here. You got me and you got Sona. Tell us about your rock and rollish story.

Hi, guys. Yeah, I'm going to have to ask you to bear with me. Like Bob before, this story also involves a van, but nobody's flying through the air and nobody dies in it. Okay, that's good. That's something we have to get out of the way right away. Just hit us with the facts. Okay, gotcha. I'll ask you to go back with me in the way back machine to maybe 86, 80s.

Okay. Something like that. And picture four scrawny, long-haired, pimply-faced, miscreant boys who somehow got tickets to see their favorite band in the world, Iron Maiden. Nice. Sick. Yeah. So we live in a small farming community or did at that time. That was about six hours drive from the near center where the band would be playing.

Okay. And my friend, fortunately, my best friend, he had a van, a van we called the Shaggin wagon. Now, I can tell you, there was no shaggin going on in that van. Oh, okay. Oh, I thought everyone was doing it in it. No judgments. You could, whatever, you know. Yeah, well, that was the time anyway.

But we got into the back of the van. I don't recall if we ever had any permission to ditch school to do this. We left anyway in the middle of the week, and we played cards in the back and listened to rock and roll. And there was a lot of rocking and rolling, if I recall, because there was no back seat in that van. So every time someone took a left or a right, we kind of rolled one way or the other, and it could make for a very not-so-comfortable ride. Okay, do. Yeah. So we get to the city where the band is playing. And we're fortunate enough. We have some place to stay. We've had to pool all of our money because we don't have enough to do anything. We don't have a lot of money. We have to budget for gas to drive all the way to the concert and then make it all the way back. This wasn't a time where there were any cell phones. We couldn't call mommy and daddy and asking to venue.

David, David, just get to the plot. Yes. The color commentary is lovely, but you really need to get to the plot, hon. Okay, gotcha. Thank you. So we get to the concert site. We get to the concert site. We decide to hang out and listen to the sound check.

Now, a tour bus pulls up outside, and we think, oh, this is Iron Maiden. This is great. And as it turns out, it's not. And it's, we wait for someone to come out of the bus. And it's, it's slash. It's slash from Guns and Roses. Stop. I would die.

I would die. They were, yeah, so they're opening up for Iron Maiden. And they weren't the big huge band that they are today. So they're opening up. I would die. But it takes us a few seconds to realize that it's him. He's not wearing his trademarked hat. And, but he, you know, he gives us the thumbs up.

He waves. We're all hooting and hollering. And the rest of the band comes out and they kind of disappear into the bowels of the arena. But there's someone missing. Axel isn't there. Axel Rose has not gotten off the bus. Right. So we're all kind of waiting.

And then out comes Axel. He's like you can imagine him. He's got the bandana. He's got the mirrored sunglasses. He doesn't acknowledge us at all. He's got a skateboard. He plops the skateboard down on the ground. He gets on it and he slowly goes down the ramp.

And as he's about to disappear into the bowels of the arena, he sticks up both of his hands and gives us the two-finger salient. Oh. That's cool. That's rock and roll. I love when you see a band right before they hit it big opening for someone else. Yeah, yeah. I saw Lady Gaga open for the, for new kids on the block.

Oh, wow. Yeah. And nobody was there. Nobody was in the arena when she was opening for that. Getting T-shirts and stuff. Yeah, yeah, yeah. They're like, we're here to see new kids, not this chick, whoever she is. Oh, my God.

I mean, when I think about rock and roll, I think about Slash. Yeah, yeah. He was my, he was my sexual awakening. Really? He was the November rain video. Wow. Yeah. Yeah.

Wow. Oh, my God. That explains why your husband wears that top hat. I keep trying to get him to grow out his hair, but he won't do it. Well, David, is that the kicker? That's amazing. That was the kicker. That's great.

You know, I mean, yeah, it was interesting, and thanks for letting me share that with him. Sure, thank you for calling, David. What a great time to go to, like, rock concerts. Yeah, yeah. The late 80s. Yeah, you too. Bye, David. Right?

Isn't that such a great time to just like, because that's when you would have to wait in line for tickets and, you know, I don't know. I mean, I was a kid during the 80s, but it sounds. No, that was, I mean, I started going to concerts like senior year high school, junior year high school. Yeah. And it was pretty good. I mean, but, you know, rock and roll was still kind of a big thing. Yeah. Whereas now there doesn't seem, it's not as much about rock and roll.

You know what? Not that recently, but maybe about a few years ago I went and saw a band called White Reaper at the, at the region in downtown. Yeah. And it was so, such an old school concert. Like, people were crowd surfing. And not everybody was filming, like, nobody was really filming anything. And there was just, it just felt good. Yeah.

And it was, it was awesome. Like old time rock and roll. Yes. I was like, I want to. crowd surf, but I didn't. I'm too scared. I'm too scared of getting groped, to be honest. Oh, yeah, yeah. Absolutely. No, more than, more than people dropping me, I'm scared of being just absolutely groped. Once you, once you get up, and I mean, male, female, there's going to be hands where you don't want them once you get up there. Yeah, I know. Have you ever crowd surfed?

No, no, no. Okay. Heaven's forbid. No, I have, I would, I would prop you up and I would grope you. That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me. No, I would not. And you know what? Now I don't like, I don't even go to, like, it takes a lot to make me want to go to a concert now. Same. Because I'm so fucking old and get so like, and I've seen a million concerts.

And, you know, there's like, eh, you know, huh. Do you remember when Jamie Lee Curtis was like talking about starting concerts early, like in the middle of the day? and everybody was like kind of making fun of her and I was like no I think she's got a point I really think that's a great idea a 4 o'clock show for the old people I would love it

I would go yeah I would go and also most of the bands that are touring and that are big touring bands these days it'll be good for them too because they're in their fucking 80s or whatever yeah I'm seeing Oasis at the Rose Bowl and I'm kind of dreading just parking Oh, it's the worst.

When I think about it, I'm like, how am I going to get there and how am I going to get back? I don't want to walk. My wife and I went to like an 80s, new wavy kind of festival there. Oh, cool. I can't remember what it's called. Cruel World. Oh, I know cruel world. And it ended up being cut short by lightning and it took us almost two hours to get out of the park.

Oh, it's a nightmare. Because there's just no one there to guide anyone. Yes. Let's get the fuck out of here. There's lightning coming. It's like 80,000 people suddenly just coming out and needing to get home. On a golf course. You're parked on a golf course.

I know. It's amazing. I know. Kirsty from Ontario. Another Canadian. Love it. Oh, my God. And we got someone else from Canada backing her up.

Kirsty, what's up? Hi, Andy. Hi, Sona. Hi there. I can't believe I'm talking to you. you guys. I love you guys so much. Oh, thank you. But believe it, you are. Yeah. Yeah. Live it, baby. It's us.

Yay. Live it, baby. My story is kind of the antithesis of rock and roll, but still kind of rock and roll. Like it. When I was in high school in like grade 10-ish, I was in a very prestigious marching band. And we toured all over the world. Wow. Oh, my God.

And, yeah, so we would play in Myrtle Beach every March break. We'd come down from Ontario in four big buses. And one time when we were walking on the beach at night with some friends, a chaperone caught us smoking a joint. Oh, my gosh. And this has been like 1990s, so not cool. so I had to put it out in my fingers and throw it in the ocean before anyone actually caught us but the mom chaperone was Jamaican so knew exactly what it was

and we almost got sent home Oh no! Wait, what did you play? What was your instrument? Would you toot? What'd you toot? I tuted the flute actually. Hey, I was right! Yeah, a flute tutor. I know is that Did you, were you in the marching band? No. I was kind of jealous of the kids in the marching band. Because they all seemed like they were really like all friends.

Yeah. And they got to go to like, you know, the. It was kind of great. It sounds like it's really fun. They got to go to all the football games and then they would just perform and everyone loves. Everyone loves a marching band. Yeah. I don't know when they got the rap that they're like marching bank geeks.

Well, they're kind of nerdy. Right. I mean, I mean, Kirstie, come on. I mean, don't you think like, I don't know. It's, you know, it's like, oh, 100%. It's and it's also, and I mean that in like, oh, they're smart and a little bit weird, meaning like people that I would like.

Yeah, that's true. I mean, she did start by saying it's the antithesis of rock and roll. Yeah. Yeah. And I mean, and it's, you know, because it is, you know, it's high school too. I don't know how much it is this. I think it's less this way now. But it was very, you know, you were like in your category.

Yes. Jock and burnout nerd, you know, theater kid, whatever. So, yeah. Oh, yeah. The marching band kids, they, well, they at least had a talent. We marched to our own beats. They at least could do something. That was like, I could never, I.

Hey, man, we went. Go ahead. We went to Hawaii twice and Japan. Wow. my god yeah but nothing compares to murder beach we were kind of a big deal nothing compares to murder beach i'm sure you were probably there for the sequined sequin tube top festival that's that's the turtle she has spoken place on earth never been that's oh it is like oh it is it is it is i went annually so not yeah it is a big big trailer park on a beautiful beach

It's awful. It is really bad. Oh, my God. Oh, that's crazy. Yeah. See, that's what you could have told her. Look, this is Myrtle Beach. You can get in trouble if you're not getting fucked up.

Exactly. Do you still play the flute? I haven't picked it up in a long time. I have it somewhere, but no, I haven't played it in a really long time. Lizzo's making it cool. Right. Now you can shoot your flute. Yeah.

People would be like, oh, man. Just head down to start. and sit out front, you know, go to the park at sundown, play a pensive tune. All right, Kirstie, thank you so much for calling. I love that. Thank you so much. I love you guys. Sona, I loved your book, and I listen to you guys all the time.

And thank you so much for talking to you. That's so sweet. Thanks for reading it. I just finished my second one. That's what I was going to say. I guess she just finished a second one. I did. The world's worst mom.

I can't wait. That's great. Come to Canada on your book tour this time, Sona. Okay. I don't know if it's in my control. If the people of Canada will accept me, I will be there. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I will for sure be there.

And you might want to stay. And you'll spread the word and you can come and stay with us because my daughter and I would die if you ever came our way. Okay. I'm going to take you up on it. All I know is your first name, but I'll, I'll, find you. Go around Ontario being like, Kirstie! Or if someone is there,

bring your flute. Wave the flute at her, so she'll know it's you. Just be at the airport waving a flute. All right, thanks a lot, Kirstie. Thank you. Thanks, Kirstie.

Oh, man, I like her. Our third Canadian in a row. We got Ben from Nova Scotia. Hey, guys. How's it going? How are you? Good. A big fan. Thanks for having me on. And whoever is answering the message is a really nice guy too. Oh, that prick. He's a dick. Yeah, that guy's a fucking man. Shut it's dick. Listen. Yeah, he's real nice to you, people, but he's an asshole to us.

Oh, sorry I've had into it. That's okay. That's okay. I'm going to get smacked when we're done, but I don't mind. Yeah, you got to be put back in your place. I don't mind a smacker, you know. Oh, nice. So, Ben, tell us your story. I went to my first big rock and roll concert in 2012. I was like 14, so kind of just what you were talking about in high school. And it was the Arctic Monkeys and the Latkees in Portland, Maine. That's nice. That's a good show.

Yeah, yeah. I didn't know it at the time. I thought that's just what crowds were like, but they've said since that it was like the craziest crowd of their career, which set the bar really high for a first big GA show. Yeah. And so there's, you know, lots of pushing and shoving and people were getting kicked out over and over again for crowd surfing because you run aloud. They just yank you off the, you know, from above the crowd.

Yeah. All of that good stuff going on. And then, like, you know, half an hour into it, this drunk asshole appears and starts, like, falling into people to grope them. Yeah. Oh, fucking dick. Yeah, the worst. and everyone were just kind of like try to keep their section safe

but that just meant he was getting pushed around from one part of GA to another nothing was solving the problem and so that went on for a while and then the people behind us caught on that if you crowd surf you got kicked out

so everyone just picked them up and looked at them up and pretty quickly everyone was like oh it's this guy and just ran him to the front of the GA. And they, like, grabbed his ankle. And then the greatest part was that they had to, like, walk him out across the barricades. So everyone in GA got to watch him leave.

And they booed. And then they cheered. And then it was like, it was a great community feeling in that audience that night. It brought everyone together. See, we were just talking about being groped and crowd surfing. This guy groped, then crowd surf. Then he probably. Probably got qupped.

And it turns out that guy was Justin Trudeau. Oh, Jesus. Yeah. Oh, no. That's the twist end. Oh, man. It was Justin Trudeau. What a twist.

Oh, I love that. Yeah, that's, I knew my ending needed a punch up. Oh, that's, that is really like, that is, you know, like mob mentality usually is stupid. Yes. That's fucking genius. I know. I like when everybody turns on the bad guy and then justice is served. Yes, when the body is expelling a bad cell, you know. It's true. Oh, and mosh pits, you know what? I didn't know there was a code in mosh pits.

But like, if you're in a mosh pit and someone falls, they create like a barrier around the person so that the person doesn't get hurt and then everybody helps them up. It's not like, let's just hurt each other. I know, I feel like I'm such, so lame. But, you know, my husband was a big, he was a punk. He's a punk. And he's to go to a lot of these shows. And he's taken me to a few with, like, mosh pits. And he's like, you know.

Yeah, no, I have no interest in that whatsoever. I've been in one and it's thrilling. It's thrilling. You know what? I just, you know, it's like skydiving. I'll trust you on that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm not going to do it myself.

I went to a Rage Against the Machine show once at the Rose Bowl. and I was sitting in one of the seats and I could see general admission and every once in a while a fire would break out and then you'd see these flashlights go in the crowd and then they'd put out the fire and then somebody would have to be escorted out and then another fire would just start somewhere else

I mean people were just taking off their clothes setting them on fire and starting like a fire pit in the mosh pit it was incredible wow yeah wow that's amazing it was I'm also surprised you went because you You, everyone knows you work for the machine.

I know. You've been working for the machine your whole life. Conan O'Brien is very, uh... He is, yes. Oh, I was going to... He's very punk rock. He's not. He's not at all.

No, he is not. Well, Ben, thank you for the call. Ben, that's cool. That's a great story. Thank you guys. All right. Hopefully this is enough critical mass of Canadians for the next bookstore, Sona.

I hope so. I know now I really am going to talk to my publisher about going. Thanks, guys. We usually, you know, we pick out our favorite story. I kind of think it's got to be the van. I mean, we were really invested in that. Yeah, yeah. Sleep, I mean, they were all pretty good. Why do we have to pick our favorite?

That's right. You know what? We don't have to do anything we don't want to. See, I mean, all of them are my favorites because Bob's story was fast. fascinating because they almost died. Jenny, I mean, it was off topic, but fascinating because she, you know, I mean, it is kind of also punk rock to like smash your face when you're sleepwalking. What's more rock and roll than a possibly smashed eye socket? Yeah.

David at Slash, you know, Kirstie's going to pick me up from the airport with her flute and her daughter. And I'm going to stay at their house. And then, you know, Ben talked about the mosh paint. Yeah, crowd-surfing expulsion. Yeah. Crowd-surfing expulsion. I mean, they all were good in their own way. I mean, I don't want to have a favorite.

I love them all. Well, Sona, I don't know if you know this, but you are a co-host of the Conan O'Brien Needs a Friend podcast so people can find you there. Sure. You're currently running its fifth iteration of summer s'mores with Conan and the chill chums. Oh, my God, you guys are the dorkiest. Oh, what? Just the dorkiest.

We're amazing. Chill chums, they love it. I know, I know. I think they don't. I know, but I always leave drunk and very full. That's just what I know about summer s'mores. Yeah, yeah. But that, okay, I know.

I'm just kidding. I'm teasing. It says on my page, Summer Smoors with Conan and the Chill Chums, the annual summer miniseries were Sona drinks. Is that the description they gave? Oh, my God. That's what we got from your PR people.

I have PR people. I love that. Well, Sona, thank you so much for coming in. It's always a joy to see you. Anytime I get to hang out with you, I'm like, yeah. All right. I'll do it. I love you, Andy.

I feel the same way and twice. I love you too. And I love all of you out there for listening. How's that for a segue? Yeah. You guys, you're going to love stand up on Conan with Lori Kilmartin because that's coming up next. I love Lori.

Awesome stand-up clips from over the years at the Conan Show and I'll be back next week Keep on rocking. Yeah. Thank you.