The Tim Ferriss Show - #370.5: Derek Sivers on Developing Confidence, Finding Happiness, and Saying “No” to Millions (Repost)

Episode Date: May 11, 2019

This episode originally aired in 2015. You can find the show notes of the episode here. “To me, ‘busy’ implies that the person is out of control of their life.” – Derek SiversD...erek Sivers (@sivers) is one of my favorite humans, and I call him often for advice. Think of him as a philosopher-king programmer, master teacher, and merry prankster.Originally a professional musician and circus clown, Derek created CD Baby in 1998. It became the largest seller of independent music online, with $100 million in sales for 150,000 musicians.In 2008, Derek sold CD Baby for $22 million, giving the proceeds to a charitable trust for music education. He is a frequent speaker at the TED Conference, with more than 5 million views of his talks. Since 2011, he has published 34 books, including “Anything You Want,” which I’ve personally read 10+ times.Enjoy!You can find the transcript of this episode here. Transcripts of all episodes can be found here.***For show notes and past guests, please visit tim.blog/podcast.Sign up for Tim’s email newsletter (“5-Bullet Friday”) at tim.blog/friday.For transcripts of episodes, go to tim.blog/transcripts.Discover Tim’s books: tim.blog/books.Follow Tim:Twitter: twitter.com/tferriss Instagram: instagram.com/timferrissFacebook: facebook.com/timferriss YouTube: youtube.com/timferrissPast guests on The Tim Ferriss Show include Jerry Seinfeld, Hugh Jackman, Dr. Jane Goodall, LeBron James, Kevin Hart, Doris Kearns Goodwin, Jamie Foxx, Matthew McConaughey, Esther Perel, Elizabeth Gilbert, Terry Crews, Sia, Yuval Noah Harari, Malcolm Gladwell, Madeleine Albright, Cheryl Strayed, Jim Collins, Mary Karr, Maria Popova, Sam Harris, Michael Phelps, Bob Iger, Edward Norton, Arnold Schwarzenegger, Neil Strauss, Ken Burns, Maria Sharapova, Marc Andreessen, Neil Gaiman, Neil de Grasse Tyson, Jocko Willink, Daniel Ek, Kelly Slater, Dr. Peter Attia, Seth Godin, Howard Marks, Dr. Brené Brown, Eric Schmidt, Michael Lewis, Joe Gebbia, Michael Pollan, Dr. Jordan Peterson, Vince Vaughn, Brian Koppelman, Ramit Sethi, Dax Shepard, Tony Robbins, Jim Dethmer, Dan Harris, Ray Dalio, Naval Ravikant, Vitalik Buterin, Elizabeth Lesser, Amanda Palmer, Katie Haun, Sir Richard Branson, Chuck Palahniuk, Arianna Huffington, Reid Hoffman, Bill Burr, Whitney Cummings, Rick Rubin, Dr. Vivek Murthy, Darren Aronofsky, and many more.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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Starting point is 00:00:00 at this altitude i can run flat out for a half mile before my hands start shaking can i ask you a personal question now what is even a perfect time i'm a cybernetic organism living this year over a metal endoskeleton derrick welcome to the show. Thank you. I am so excited to have you on. This has been in the works for many months. And now, of course, the timing is such, and I'm going to read a bio, a short intro for you, for folks, in a second. But we're going to come back to the subject of fasting, because I'm eight days into a 10-day fast.
Starting point is 00:00:45 And I was astonished to hear when we were chatting a day or two ago that you have done something very similar, if not the same. So before we get to that, though, for everybody listening, Derek Sivers, one of my favorite humans. I'm so excited to have him on the phone. And here is a sketch of his background. Originally a professional musician and circus clown, Derek Sivers, you should say hi to him, at Sivers on the Twitter, that is S-I-V-E-R-S, created CD Baby in 1998,
Starting point is 00:01:15 became the largest seller of independent music online with $100 million in sales for 150,000 musicians. In 2008, Derek sold CD Baby for $22 million, giving the proceeds to a charitable trust for music education. He is and has been a frequent speaker on the TED conference circuit with more than 5 million views of his talks. And since 2011, he has published 24 books, including Anything You Want, which shot to number one on all of its Amazon categories. It is also one of the few business books, which I think categorically are generally terrible, that I have not only read multiple times, but listened to multiple times, the last of which was in Sweden about a month and a half ago before deciding to take my startup vacation,
Starting point is 00:01:59 effectively my retirement from startup investing. So Derek, thank you for putting out such good work. First, before we even jump into it. Thanks. Good to finally, well, you know, officially talk to you. We always talk off the record, which is kind of funny sometimes because every now and then people ask me about like, hey, do you know what Tim's investing in? Do you know about this? And I think, you know, every time you and I talk, we just, we talk about women.
Starting point is 00:02:26 So here we are having an official conversation, finally. No, we are. And I should also underscore for people, number one, I'm eight days into fasting. So if I sound like an idiot, I'm going to blame it on that. But second is that I consider you a reality check for me. And we first met, I want to say it was at a music and tech or tech and music event in 2007, perhaps 2008. And, uh, I was familiar with some of your work. You had read the four hour work week and the, the prompt for me to call you oftentimes is number one, if I just need a sanity check, where, for instance, if people around me seem to be asking the question, how should you best grow your company?
Starting point is 00:03:14 And then there's an A, B, C, multiple choice list. I don't necessarily go to you to get a D and an E. I go to you because you will say, well, why do you want to grow your company in the first place? And secondly, because you're very good at simplifying and breaking things down. I recall, and I might be getting the location wrong, but I seem to place this in Times Square, sitting on the bleachers, talking about, I think it was SQL and databases. And I was saying that I was extremely uncomfortable, felt out of my depth when talking to engineers. And you're like, oh, it's not that hard. And you sat down and on a single piece of paper,
Starting point is 00:03:57 sketched out databases and SQL and how it worked. And I just admire the, not only capability, which is not that common, but the willingness to simplify something where I think we live in a world where many people complicate to profit, right? If what you do is simple, then you feel like you're dispensable, if that makes sense. And, uh, but I want to stop talking and ask you, because I'm not sure I actually ever heard the full story. Originally a professional musician. I mean, ideally a rock star, yeah. But if I was just making my living doing music, that was the goal. So I'm 18 years old. I'm living in Boston. I'm going to Berklee College of Music.
Starting point is 00:04:54 And I'm in this band where the bass player one day in rehearsal says, Hey, man, my agent just offered me a gig that's like 75 to play at a pig show in vermont he rolls his eyes and he's like i'm not gonna do it do you want the gig i'm like fuck yeah a paying gig oh my god yes so uh i took the gig to go up to burlington vermont and i think it was like a you know 58 roundrip bus ticket. And I get to this pig show in Vermont, I strap my acoustic guitar on, and I walk around a pig show playing music. And did that for like three hours, got on the bus home,
Starting point is 00:05:35 and the next day the booking agent called me up and said, hey, so yeah, you did a really good job at the pig show. We got good reports there. Wondering if you can come play at an art opening in Western Massachusetts. I'll pay you 75 bucks again. I said, yeah, sure. So same thing. I took, you know, like a $60 bus out to Western Massachusetts, got 75 bucks for playing at an art opening. And the agent was there and he was impressed. And so he said, hey, look, I've got this circus and the previous musician just quit. So we really need somebody new. And I really like what you're doing. So there's about three gigs a week. I can pay you 75 bucks a gig. They're to come up later, you know, with the hell yeah or no thing, but I think it's really smart to switch strategies. But when you're earlier in your career, I think the best strategies,, I'm 18, I had no stage experience. And after a few gigs, they said, hey, so the previous musician used to go out and open
Starting point is 00:06:52 the show with this big theme song and get everybody up and dancing. Could you do that? And I said, yeah, sure. And another gig or two later, they said, hey, the previous musician used to close the show also with that theme song. Could you do that? I said, yeah, sure. And then it was the previous musician used to go out in between every act and like, you know,
Starting point is 00:07:10 get the audience to applaud and thank them and introduce the next act. Do you think you could do that? I said, yeah, sure. And I was really bad at it at first, but I got good eventually. I became like the ringleader MC of this whole circus And I was 18 years old. So if you were to go to the circus, it would have looked like my show. And I did that for 10 years from the age of 18 to 28. I did over 1000 shows. And eventually, by the way, you know, got paid more than 75 bucks. Eventually, I was getting like 300 bucks a show. And it became my full time living. And I even bought a house with the money I made playing with the circus. And then that led to all kinds of other things. So just so many huge opportunities and 10 years of
Starting point is 00:07:50 stage experience came from that one piddly little pig show that I said yes to this little thing. So yeah, the only reason I stopped doing the circus is when CD Baby started taking over my life and I had to start turning down circus gigs. But yeah, that was my life for 10 years. What did you learn that made you better? What were the lessons learned that made the biggest difference in your performance as this emcee? Good question. What were the biggest mistakes that you made early on that you
Starting point is 00:08:25 corrected? Either one is fine. All right. It's kind of the same answer is that at first I was too self-conscious because I thought it was about me. Like I was going up on stage thinking that the audience was somehow judging me. Derek Siver is like, as if I mattered, you know? So I would get self-conscious of what they thought of me. And eventually, and I think it took maybe like 10 or 20 gigs with the, the circus was run by a husband and wife team. And Tarleton was the name of the wife that, she was the one really kind of out on the gigs and leading the circus.
Starting point is 00:09:07 The husband was more the booking agent. And she's the one that like single-handedly gave me my confidence that I have today. Like sometimes when people ask me, why am I so confident? It's like, that's because of Tarleton. That's a longer story we get into. But anyway, Tarleton is the one that she just kept pushing me from backstage, like, come on, you're up there acting like David Letterman. Like, don't do this whole kind of, yeah, I'm so cool. All right, everybody, here's the next act. Like, I think I was trying to be cool because I thought that people were judging me, right?
Starting point is 00:09:41 And she said, these people came here for a a show go give them what they came here for and so one time i decided to go out there and just be over the top ridiculous i went on stage and i said ladies and gentlemen what you're about to see is one of the most amazing things you know we have an elephant that is going to be coming from backstage and i did this whole like thing in the fast talking voice and a real like pizzazz to it and the audience loved it. And I came backstage and she said, there you go. That's what people come to the circus for. So now that I've been on stage,
Starting point is 00:10:13 you know, thousands of times, this really sunk in that you get on stage to give the audience what they came there for. Or even things like this, this interview we're doing, this isn't necessarily for you or me. We could just hang up the phone and talk. We don't need to do this, but we're doing this for the listeners. So we're going to give them something that's useful to them. This isn't about me. It isn't about you. This is about them. So that was the
Starting point is 00:10:40 biggest lesson learned. Luckily, I learned that early on when I was 18, 19. And yeah. So I know we could come back to it, but I don't want to forget since I have low, low glucose brain, which I think I just made Japanese accidentally, but so how did she give you your confidence? Or if you prefer to answer it a different way, because I get this question a lot from fans on Twitter, for instance, you know, how did you get so confident? And there are things I can point to from athletic training with specific wrestling coaches and so on. But if, if what did that woman do that, that helped make you more to help make you more confident? Or if you were trying to coach somebody who's going to get up and give their first TED talk, what would you say to them? And I don't know if the answers are similar. Completely different answers. So we'll just do the confidence one.
Starting point is 00:11:29 I can give TED Talk advice later if you want. Is that in my case, you got to understand, Tarleton was hot. I was 18, she was 33. And even the first time I ever saw her, I told you she was the booking agent's wife. So when I took that bus out to Western Massachusetts the first time, I'm sitting in the Worcester Mass bus station. It's nasty. It's the dregs of the earth with fluids dripping. And it's gross. And I'm sitting there waiting for somebody to pick me up. And then like the door opens to the bus station. And it's like that scene in the movie with the backlit woman and, you know, the fan blowing her hair and dream weaver,
Starting point is 00:12:14 you know, is that moment, this gorgeous woman walks in the bus station. I'm like, who is that? And she walks towards me and she says, Derek. I was like,
Starting point is 00:12:24 so that was Tarleton. So it's important to know that Tarleton is hot. She still is. And so, you know, I was 18 and I was dating girls in Boston. And of course, just everybody broke my heart. And this one girl from Texas just dumped me and I was sad and at that point Tarleton and I had been traveling together on the circus for a year or so so she knew me very well and uh when I told her about you know the girl from Texas that dumped me she just said Derek like you don't understand like I've met a lot of guys in my life a lot of guys she said you are one of like the smartest,
Starting point is 00:13:06 was brilliant, like considerate, like you've got a future, you've got your shit together. You're like, if some woman doesn't see that, that's her problem. Okay. So the first like a hundred times she said this, I just thought she was just being nice. You know, I was like, oh, thank you. But I'm still sad. And I think it took about a year where she just kept telling me this and kept telling me this. And after about a year, it kind of sunk in. I just noticed that I had kind of internalized this. Like, yeah, sorry, and you can't see me right now,
Starting point is 00:13:35 but I've just changed my posture. I'm like, yeah, I'm pretty fucking awesome. I'm cool. I really internalized that. So I just carried that with me ever since. Sometimes there's this beautiful Kurt Vonnegut quote that's just a throwaway line in the middle of one of his books that says, you are whatever you pretend to be. That's such a good line. And I took that to heart.
Starting point is 00:14:00 I just thought, you know, I'd also been reading Tony Robbins and stuff by then. Actually, oh, God, Tarleton is the same woman. She's the one that told me to read Tony Robbins' Awaken the Giant Within when I was 19, and that changed my life. So, yeah, she's one of the big three influences of my life. That's probably the exact same age that I read the exact same book, just as a side note.
Starting point is 00:14:19 That is a good time to read it, those formative years. So, yeah, I think the You are whatever you pretend to be. I think I just realized somewhere in there that you can just choose to be confident. She helped kind of start it for me, but then I kept it up myself. Even when everything's going terribly and I have no reason to be confident, I just decide to be. It seems like most of my friends who are what most people would consider successful in various respects can trace their confidence back to either, uh, or both end a specific woman and a specific coach or mentor of some type. It's all, it almost always comes down to one or both of those. Oh,
Starting point is 00:15:10 Tim, you know, I've never told you about chemo Williams. It's a great name. And I want to learn more. No, I don't know anything about this is so up your alley. I can't believe I've never told you this.
Starting point is 00:15:21 Okay. Thanks for prodding me. I mean, you prompted me with that because you're right. It was a gorgeous woman, Tarleton, and it was a music teacher, Kimo Williams. But see, he changed my life a year or two before I met her. Okay. So imagine this. I'm 17 years old now. I'm living in suburban Chicago and I decide to go to Berklee College of Music because I want to be a famous musician. And just like two or three months before I'm supposed to go, I see an ad in the local Chicago Tribune for music typesetting. And I'm wondering like how much sheet music I'm going to have to
Starting point is 00:15:57 be writing. So I call up this classified ad in the paper. And I say, can I ask you some questions about music typesetting? And he said, sure. Well, why do you want to know? And I said, because I'm about to go off to Berklee College of Music in a couple months. And he said, oh, really? He said, I used to teach at Berklee College of Music. I said, you did? Do you think you can give me some tips? He said, yeah. Here's my address.
Starting point is 00:16:19 Come to my studio at 9 a.m. Thursday morning. See you then. And he lived like way downtown Chicago in an area I'd never been to. And I'm going to do a little foreshadowing of the story right now, because when I got married years later to the woman I met when I was sitting in Times Square with you, he was one of only three people I invited to the wedding. It was Tarleton from the circus, Kimo Williams, my music teacher,
Starting point is 00:16:52 and my first girlfriend, Camille. Those are my only three guests to my wedding. And Kimo Williams told the story to my family. He said, you know, I tell people all the time. I get all these kids that want to be famous. And I say, yep, show up at my studio at 9am. And he said, nobody ever does. Nobody has their shit together to show up when I tell them to. And he said, so I'd honestly forgotten that there was this kid that called from a classified ad. That was his way of saying no. Not no, it's just his hurdle. He was like, yeah, all right, kid. Sure. Here's a seven foot hurdle. Let's see how you do. is, yeah, Kimo Williams is this large black man from Hawaii
Starting point is 00:17:45 that was a musician that attended Berklee School of Music and then stayed there to teach for a while. And so what he taught me in four lessons got me to graduate Berklee College of Music in half the time it would take. And here was his thing. He said, the reason I wanted you to like study with me for a bit he said i know you only have like eight weeks before you go to school he said i
Starting point is 00:18:10 think you can graduate berkeley school of music in two years instead of four um he said the standard pace is for chumps i should get a t-shirt made this is like totally know. This is like totally Tim Ferriss stuff, right? This is like, I can't believe we hadn't talked about this before, that he's the one at the age of like 17, 18 got me into this mentality. He said, where the standard pace is for chumps. That's, the school has to organize its curricula around the lowest common denominator so that almost nobody is left out. So they have to slow down so that everybody can catch up. But he said, you're smarter than that, or anybody can be smarter than that if they want to be. So you can go as fast as you want. And here's how. And so he sat me down at the piano. He said, okay, what do you know about music theory? I said, well, I don't
Starting point is 00:18:58 know. Let's find out. And he just asked me a few of these music questions. Like, okay, how does a major scale go? Right? Okay. Show me the tritone. Do you know what a tritone is, he just asked me a few of these music questions. Like, okay, what, how does the major scale go to, to, to, to, right. Okay. Show me the tritone. Do you know what a tritone is? Okay. Play me a tritone in the C major scale. I'm like, uh, okay. B and F. He said, okay, now, uh, how can you take that?
Starting point is 00:19:13 And what other chord can you make from B and F? He said, okay, that's called the substitute chord. Now what is a resolution? We realized, and he was just like, boom, boom, boom. At this kind of pace, he was doing all this music theory stuff with me. It was so intense. And I was like, I had all this adrenaline, like a video game. I was like, this is amazing. Okay. Keep going. I said, okay, and this kind of pace. He was doing all this music theory stuff with me. It was so intense. And I was like, I had all this adrenaline like a video game. I was like, this is amazing.
Starting point is 00:19:27 Okay, keep going. I said, okay, do that and this and this. And that was like a two-hour lesson that went at that kind of pace. And then he dumped a bunch of homework on me. He said, okay, now go home tonight and take this big book of jazz standards. Find me all the two-five substitutions or two-five closures. Now substitute chords for that and then come back next Thursday and we'll do this again. So we did that for like four Thursdays in a row.
Starting point is 00:19:51 And sure enough, what he taught me in four two hour sessions was basically like two years of Berklee College of Music. He compressed it into four lessons. So that when I showed up to my first day of Berkeley, I tested out of the first few years. Just thanks to him. And then he even taught me a strategy. He offhand mentioned, he said, you know, I think they might still have a rule in place where those other required courses that you have to take to graduate. He said, I think you could pretty much just buy the books for those and then contact the department head and just take the final exam to get credit. So I did that too. So when I got there, all those required classes like Bach counterpoint classes,
Starting point is 00:20:38 I wasn't so interested in it. So I bought the book, did all the homework, approached the department head, said, can I take the final exam for this? And he looked at me weird and said, okay. Took the final exam and got credit without ever having to attend the class. And yeah, that's how I graduated Berklee College of Music in two years. That's incredible. What a gift.
Starting point is 00:20:55 I mean, did he ever, aside from just showing up, which is, of course, half the battle, if not more than half the battle. Did he ever explain to you why he adopted you in that way? Were you the first person, first student he'd done that for? Or is this something he'd done before? I think he, yeah, he's definitely done it before and since. So as far as I know, last time we spoke, he's still teaching at Columbia College in downtown Chicago in the music department. So I think he's done this for many people since. He's just an amazing guy that is just a great teacher, a very strict teacher.
Starting point is 00:21:30 He holds everybody to a really high standard. That whole, like, if he said, show up at my studio at 9 a.m., if I would have rang the doorbell at 9, 10, he would have said, hmm, I guess you're not serious, and he probably would have turned me away. So he does that with his students. And yeah, so he's done that for many people before and since, I think. What would he say to you, if you recall, when you did something incorrectly? How did he provide feedback?
Starting point is 00:22:02 Well, I think for specific things, he'd just kind of give me that raised eyebrow look like, oh, really? You think that is that? But you know what? It's kind of the answer to your question is he would question things kind of like you were talking about, you know, calling me when wondering if people are asking the right questions. So when I first caught that very first phone call, where I said, I'm going to go to Berklee College of Music in eight weeks. And he said, really, why do you want to go to Berklee? And I said, well, because I want to be a famous, successful singer, songwriter, performer.
Starting point is 00:22:39 He said, hmm. He said, well, four years and $100,000 in tuition, It's a lot of money to learn to write a verse in a chorus. Like that kind of thing. Like, oh, really? Is that really the reason you're doing this? Like just constantly questioning. That's so incredibly, especially at that age. I mean, what an incredible molding that he provided. Ever since then, I mean, you know, you and I have often the same approach to life, like looking for the shortcuts or just kind of more like looking at the way that most people do things and saying like, you know, you don't have to do it that way. That's very inefficient. You could just do this. So he just gave me that approach to life. It's great. And on a related note, could you talk about, and we've talked about this a bit, but I never tire of it, relaxing for the same result? Because I think this is such a huge observation that it's incredibly important for type A personalities, or at least for me, because I have a tendency to almost want to burn the candle at both ends to prove to myself that I'm putting forth the maximum effort. I'm leaving as little as possible to chance.
Starting point is 00:23:56 You? No. With certain things. But tell everybody about the bike, about the bicycle experience. Yeah, this was kind of profound. Um, now granted, I didn't learn this until later, but yeah, I'd been very, very, very type A my whole life. Uh, even before I met Kimu Williams, you know what I mean? Age of 14. It's just, my friends called me the robot because they would never see me sleep or eat or relax or hang out.
Starting point is 00:24:26 I just was like so focused on being the best musician I could be that I would just practice every waking minute. If I'd begrudgingly go to a party, you know, I'd bring my guitar with me and I'd be sitting in the corner practicing my scales and arpeggios while everybody was hanging out, getting high, you know? So yeah, I've always been very type A. And so a friend of mine got me into cycling when I was living in LA. And I lived right on the beach in Santa Monica where there's this great bike path in the sand
Starting point is 00:24:55 that goes for, I think it's 25 miles in the sand. No, hold on. Something like that. The exact number doesn't matter. But what I would do is I would go onto the bike path and I would get like head down and push it as hard as I could. I would go all the way to one end of the bike path and back and then back home. And I'd set my little timer when doing this. Huffing and puffing, red face.
Starting point is 00:25:20 Yeah, just red face huffing it. But like just pushing it as hard as I can. Every single, you know, thrust of the leg, just. And of course, you know, that made me quite fun if somebody was in my way on the bike path. Sure. That guy's got places to go. So, but I noticed it was always 43 minutes. I mean, you know, if you know Santa Monica, California, you know, the weather is about exactly the same all year round. So unless it was a surprisingly windy day, it was always 43 minutes is what it took me to go as fast as I could on that bike path.
Starting point is 00:25:54 But I noticed that over time, I was starting to feel less psyched about going out on the bike path. Because just mentally when I would think of it, it would feel like pain and hard work. It sounds like pain and hard work. Yeah, I mean, it was. But you know, I guess at first, that was okay. And after a while, I just felt like, I don't know, riding the bike, why don't I just hang out? So then I say, you know, that's not cool for me to start to associate negative stuff with going on the bike ride. Why don't I just chill for once? Like, I'm just going to go on the same bike ride.
Starting point is 00:26:30 But just, you know, I'm not going to be a complete snail, but I'll go at like half of my normal pace. So, yeah, I got on my bike and it was just pleasant. I just went on the same bike ride, but I was more like standing up. And I just noticed that I was looking around more and I looked out in the ocean I noticed that day there were these dolphins jumping in the ocean and I went down to Marina Del Rey to my turnaround point
Starting point is 00:26:54 and oh no actually it was when the breakers at Marina Del Rey there was a penguin that was flying above me I was like no way I looked up I was like hey a penguin and he shit in like, hey, a penguin. And he shit in my mouth. Was it a penguin
Starting point is 00:27:09 or a pelican? Oh, sorry, pelican. I was kidding. A flying penguin above my head. That would be more amazing. What did you take before your ride? So you had a pelican shit in your mouth.
Starting point is 00:27:24 That's incredible accuracy was that from like how far away was it uh like 20 feet up wow because i don't know if he was accurate or i was you know anyway so the point is i i had such a nice time it was just purely pleasant there was no red face there was no huffing and puffing. I was just cycling. It was nice. And when I got back to my usual stopping place, I looked at my watch and it said 45 minutes. And I was like, no way. How the hell could that have been 45 minutes as compared to my usual 43? It's like, there's no way, but yeah, it was right. 45 minutes. And that was like a profound lesson that I think changed the way I've approached my life ever since. It's because I realized that, I guess, you know, what percentage of that huffing and puffing then, we could do the math, whatever, 93 point something percent of my huffing and puffing and all that red face and all that stress was only for an extra two minutes. It was basically for nothing. I mean, you know, of course we're not talking about me competing in something where the huffing and puffing might
Starting point is 00:28:33 have been worth it. But for life, I think of all of this optimization and getting the maximum dollar out of everything and the maximum out of every second to the maximum out of every minute. And I think I just take this approach now of going like, or you could just take the lesson, take most of that lesson and apply it and be effective and be happy. But you don't need to stress about any of this stuff. And so honestly, that's been my approach ever since I do things, but I stop before anything gets stressful. Is there any particular way that you remind yourself of that given a lifetime of hard charging? If I would find, I do find that I sometimes lose track of that type of truth, which I think is a truth in almost every aspect of the endeavors that I partake in, at least. Are there any particular ways that you remind yourself of that or keep it present for you?
Starting point is 00:29:30 I think it's just noticing the pain. Luckily, I live in a world where there's more psychic pain than physical pain, right? So you have to notice the psychic pain that you're feeling of whether it's doing things you don't want to be doing and feeling the pain and regret of that or the frustration. Just when you notice this internal, that always, that's my cue that I treat that like physical pain of like, what am I doing? I need to stop doing that thing that hurts. What is that? And it usually means that I'm just pushing too hard or doing things that I don't really want to be doing because I was asking the wrong questions
Starting point is 00:30:10 and following the wrong path, the wrong outcome. Now, rewinding the clock a little bit, 1998. How did CD Baby come to be? I was really just selling my own CD on my band's website. I had a band called Hit Me, and I had this CD that was being played on radio stations across the country. I think I was on 350 college radio stations across America. But the only way to buy it was to mail a check or money order to my address. You know, this is before the average person could get any e-commerce online because there was no PayPal. I guess I could have put it up on eBay or something, right? But that was like the only way you could sell your CD online as an independent musician. There was just nobody anywhere that would sell it for you. There were a couple of big online record stores at the time. There was a musicboulevard.com and cdnow.com. I think Amazon bought them both. But the only way to get into
Starting point is 00:31:17 their system was to go through the major labels, basically to get a major label record deal and then be in the major label distribution system. And then you would appear on cdnow.com, right? So I thought, okay, this is just a horrible convoluted thing. Like it should be dead simple to just put your stuff online, have a buy now button and ship it to the person that buys it. It shouldn't need to be that complicated. So I did the research and I did the work and I went and got myself a credit card merchant account, which was like a thousand dollars in setup fees. They actually had to send an inspector out to my location to make sure I was a valid business. I think I even had to incorporate to make them happy. I set up a separate bank account, did all of this red tape,
Starting point is 00:32:01 a lot of paperwork, thousand dollar in setup fees. But after three months, I had a credit card merchant account. And then I had to figure out how to make a buy now button on my website. And that was also hard. Had to buy a book on CGI bin pearl scripts and copy the example from the book on how to make a buy now button. But after three months of hard work, I did it. My band's website had a buy now button that was like, wow, look at that. And so my friends in the New York City music scene, like my fellow musicians said, whoa, dude, like, do you think you could sell my CD through that thing? I said, you mean on my band's website? They said, yeah, if you don't mind. I said, yeah, sure. Why not? So it was like a favor to my friend, Marco. Actually, here's a little tidbit of information. Marco, who I just knew as a musician, Marco Atasari, I knew him as a cool musician in New York City. He was technically the guy that gave me the idea for CD Baby. Later,
Starting point is 00:33:00 I found out that he's the son of the prime minister of Finland. And it was like all in the news and I had no idea. But Marco, thank you. He's the one that asked me if I could sell his CD through my band's website. And so I did. And then I started getting calls like, hey, man, my friend Marco said of Marco's is a friend of mine. And it just, it grew by request. And yeah, which is, which kind of led me to the belief that, you know, when people ask me how to, how do I grow my business? I've got this business idea. Basically, I'm trying to push it onto the world. How do I push my idea into the world? I have no idea. I have no advice for those people because I've only ever worked on the pull method where people ask me to do things for them and I say yes. So CD Baby just happened because all of my musician friends were asking me to sell their CD on my band's website. And then I just,
Starting point is 00:34:02 eventually there were so many that I just took them off of my band's site and put them onto their own site. And that was cdbaby.com. Of your projects that have done well, what percentage have come from scratching your own itch a la cdbaby? Uh, have, are any of the projects that have gained traction projects that you've thought of sending to a market that didn't include you? Actually, after that first one, I mean, yes, I built a thing to sell my own CD, but, um, actually all of them were scratching other people's itches. Uh, I don't want to get too, I don't want to picture that. Um, like, for example, shortly after that, I already had a UPC barcode thing. The way it used to work with that,
Starting point is 00:34:55 to get a barcode on your album, you had to pay like, I don't know, $400 to the Universal Code Council in order to get a six-digit prefix, which then let you assign the next five digits, which meant 100,000 products underneath your barcode product ID or something like that. So a lot of musicians in the independent music world
Starting point is 00:35:15 wanted to have a UPC barcode for their album. That would let them sell it in physical retail stores, and a lot of physical retail stores wouldn't let you sell something unless it had a UPC barcode. But they didn't want to all have to pay the $400 to get a company account. But I already had a company account. And so I just let a lot of musicians know, if you ever need a barcode, let me know. I can get one for you. So enough people started taking me up on this that I decided to charge $20 for it,
Starting point is 00:35:43 because it would take me some time to assign them an ID and then generate the EPS or TIFF graphic file to be included in their album artwork. And eventually I automated it. Point is, 100,000 barcodes were assigned at $20 each. That's what I charged for the service. It was like $2 million I made for this $400 setup fee for getting a Universal Code Council account. So you could say that I was scratching my itch, but really, I think of it as the co-op business model. It was responding to demand instead of trying to create demand. Yes, I've never tried to create demand. I've never done that.
Starting point is 00:36:20 I don't know how. I've only basically answered the calls for help. And it's usually using what I call the co-op business model, which is, I've already got something. Other people could use it. I'm happy to share it. I'll just charge a little something to help pay for my time and resources so that we can all share this resource that I've already got. So I love, this is, I think, a great example of spotting something small, perhaps looking at a situation that many, many other people have been presented with and spotting something interesting, in this case, an opportunity. And I want to highlight one other example, which is an email that you wrote. And I'm going to,
Starting point is 00:37:06 I'm going to just read a little bit here. So this is, uh, this is from some of your writing. When you make a business, you're making a little world where you control the laws. It doesn't matter how things are done everywhere else in your little world, you can make it like it should be. And I know you're better at reading this stuff, but I'm just going to, just because I have it right in front of me. Uh, when I first built CD baby, every order had an automated email that let the customer know when the CD was actually shipped. And of course, this is Tim speaking now, uh, everyone's seen these. They tend to be very plain Jane, very generic, very boring. At first it was just the normal, this is back to your writing.
Starting point is 00:37:38 Your order is shipped today. Please let us know if it doesn't arrive. Thank you for your business. A few months later, I felt it was very incongruent with my mission to help people smile. I knew I could do better, so I took 20 minutes and wrote this goofy little thing. This is the email that would go out to folks. Your CD has been gently taken from our CD baby shelves with sterilized contamination-free gloves and placed onto a satin pillow. A team of 50 employees inspected your CD and polished it to make sure it was the best possible condition before mailing. Our packing specialist from Japan lit a candle and a hush fell over the crowd as he put your CD into the finest gold-lined box that money can buy. We all had a wonderful celebration afterwards, and the whole party marched down the street to the post office where the entire town of Portland waved,
Starting point is 00:38:19 Bon Voyage to your package on its way to you in our private CD Baby jet on this day, Friday, June 6th. I hope that you had a wonderful time shopping at CD Baby. We sure did. Your picture's on our wall as customer of the year. We're all exhausted, but can't wait for you to come back to cdbaby.com, two exclamation points. So that 20 minutes, what happened after you put that together? Well, people would get it and reply back. Like, whoever replies back to an automated shipping email, right? Whoever replies back to Amazon saying, wow, guys, thank you so much. But the fact that this little quirky email had so much personality, for one, it let them know, like, there's real people here. And so customers will often reply back saying,
Starting point is 00:39:09 you guys are hilarious. That was the weirdest thing ever. That's awesome. But more importantly, people started sharing it. They would forward it to all of their friends. Like, you guys have to see this. And people who had blogs would post it on their blogs, even just their little blog spot or WordPress or
Starting point is 00:39:25 whatever blog. So now if you take any of those sentences from that email and you put it into quotation marks and search for it on Google, you'll find literally thousands of blogs have pasted my confirmation email onto their blogs. And I think about this when young entrepreneurs ask me, like, how can I get traction for my idea? How can I get word of mouth and buzz happening? I think you can read business books and try to from the rest that make you remarkable, that make people remark on you, about you. So, yeah, I think thousands of people heard about CD Baby because of that one little silly email. And I think a comparable might be Zappos, for instance, and their customer service. And what was the anecdote that got
Starting point is 00:40:25 spread around? The anecdote was you could call up Zappos for anything, even if it was unrelated to the product. You could call them up and say, yes, I'm looking at the website, but I'd actually really like a pizza delivered to my house. And they would figure out how to do it. And on the serious analytical side, you say, oh my God, that's such a waste of human and capital resources. And can you imagine if everybody called to order pizza, which of course is never going to happen ever. And they got, I mean, probably millions of dollars of free publicity just by making that okay.
Starting point is 00:40:59 And like, how long did that take? What? Not long at all. Plus, you know what, man? I don't mean to sound like new agey or whatever, but it's at all. Plus, you know what, man? I don't mean to sound like new agey or whatever, but it's the right thing to do for the world, right? It's like, just put aside the numbers for a bit. It's the right thing to do.
Starting point is 00:41:14 It's cool. It makes people happier. It makes the people working there happier, which makes them more into the whole feeling of what they're doing. There's so much more to a business than just the money. Yeah. So tell me about, I remember reading about this, but I think we might've talked about it at one point, which was when people would call CD Baby trying to offer you financing. How did those go? Well, so remember I started CD Baby at like the end of 97, beginning of 98. So it was the first dot if you were a musician that wanted to sell your music online, there was a guy named Derek in New York
Starting point is 00:42:09 that could do it for you, and that was it. There were no other businesses that would do it. Some showed up like a year or two later, but at first I had no competition at all. I was it. So yeah, tons of money was shoved my direction, and I entertained the first few calls. And they said, you know, we want to invest in your company.
Starting point is 00:42:30 I said, well, why? They said, so you can grow it faster. I said, but I don't want to grow it faster. They said, well, you know, don't you want to scale or get more resources? I said, no, I have all the resources I need. Like, I'm good. Like, I was profitable, you know, since the first month in business, because my startup costs were $495 is what it cost me to start the business and get it running. It took me six days to build the site and
Starting point is 00:42:55 get it up and running. And it was profitable in the second month of business when I sold over $400 of CDs that second month in business, I was profitable ever since. And I just didn't need the money. And so, yeah, people kept offering and they would wave these big dreams in my face thinking it was going to distract them or entice me, but it just didn't. And I remember, oh, I doubt you remember, mp3.com was a big deal in like 1999 through 2002 or so. They were like the big daddy of independent streaming music online and downloads. And so they had an IPO. They were public.
Starting point is 00:43:35 And MP3.com was interested in buying CD Baby. And they asked what my price would be. And I said, just not interested in selling. And they said, come on, everybody's got their price. And I said, no, I'm not interested. I'm just not interested in selling. And they said, come on, everybody's got their price. And I said, no, I'm not interested. I'm having fun. They said, come on, even billions of dollars?
Starting point is 00:43:51 And I said, what are you, Carl Sagan? No, I don't want to sell. There's just nothing in it for me. I'm enjoying what I'm doing. I don't need the money. So after that point, like after the first year or two, I just taught my customer service people, like if you get any calls from investors or whatever VC firms or two, I just taught my customer service people, like, if you get any calls from investors, or I, whatever VC firms or anything, please just tell them no, like, don't even send them my way. I'm just we're just not interested. So yeah, that lasted for 10 years.
Starting point is 00:44:15 And how did you? How did you develop that relationship with money? Is that something from your parents? Is that, and I'm going to ask a very personal question also, and you can feel free to not answer it, but why did your family, why did, why were none of your family members at your wedding? Oh, sorry. They were too. Sorry. When I said, when I said three guests, I meant, yeah. Okay. All right. Sorry about that. All right. No, no, no. Now that I've checked that. Okay.
Starting point is 00:44:44 I hate them. It was in the back of my mind. So how did you develop this relationship with money where you would say no like that for 10 years? Because It's a bit of a trick reason. Because in the early days, I still considered CD Baby to be a bit of a distraction. Because you remember, I was making my living as a professional musician, which was my original goal and dream. So I was living my dream. I was touring, playing on people's records, producing people's records. I played about 500 colleges in the Northeast.
Starting point is 00:45:32 I was making good money as a professional musician. Like that's what I really wanted to do. And this little CD Baby thing was just like a favor I was doing for my friends to kind of give back to the community, right? So as it grew, well, I didn't want it to grow because, yeah, it was taking me away from my music, which is my real love. It's making the music, not selling other people's music. So there was this moment when I kind of sadly realized
Starting point is 00:45:59 I think I've created a business. Oh, well, I might as well make it something awesome. Meaning, I want to make it like a utopian dream come true from a musician's point of view. And I spent a night brainstorming, like, what would a real like dream come true from a musician's point of view look like? And I don't know if this will make sense to your listeners, but let's just find out is that, that it was going against everything that was the unfortunate way that the music distribution world worked at the time. So it's like, number one,
Starting point is 00:46:33 I want to be paid every week. Number two, I want to know the full name and address of everybody that buys my music. Um, number three, you'll never kick me out for not selling enough because that was a big problem in the traditional music distribution world, is you were given a window of time, kind of like physical books still are. You have to prove yourself in a window of time. They'll put you into the bookstore. If it doesn't sell well, you're yanked out to make room on the shelf for other stuff. because it never felt fair that people could come in and buy up the front page to get unequal footing, right? So that was like my utopian ideal for how this would work. The reason I'm telling you this is to set the tone
Starting point is 00:47:15 that I wasn't trying to make money. I already had enough money that I had made, you know, gigging and touring and all that stuff. I already had money. So this was a thing I was doing to give back to the community to create something that needed to exist kind of artistically, or just almost like a community service kind of thing. So that was the original DNA of this thing. And you know, from what we know about DNA, it helps decide what
Starting point is 00:47:43 things grow into, right? So this was the DNA. So then as it grew, and then it became really profitable. And I was making, I don't know, $100,000 a month doing this thing. And I had all my bills paid off. There was nothing I wanted to buy. So if somebody from California contacted me saying they wanted to give me lots of money to take a big chunk of my business and help turn it, you know, big, big, big. We think you could do an IPO.
Starting point is 00:48:09 I would just sneer like, no, that sounds awful. I don't want that life. I'm enjoying being fully in control here and doing things for the right reasons, doing things for my musician friends to make them happy, make the customers happy, make the musicians happy. Like all's good. Um, what was the business model in the very beginning? Um, it was only two numbers. Actually, there's, there's a cute story. Most of us, you know, when we start charging money for the first time for our services or our goods, we don't know what to charge. Right. So for Marco, my first friend that asked me to do this, and maybe the next 10 or 15 friends that came after, I was charging
Starting point is 00:48:51 nothing. I was just doing this as a free favor. This was my community service. And then once I realized like total strangers were sending me their music, I thought, all right, I better charge something, but I don't know what to charge. So I was living in Woodstock, New York at the time, and there was a cute, tiny little record store in town that sold consignment CDs on the counter of local musicians. So I walked in there one day, and I said, hey, how does it work if I want to sell my CD here? And she said, well, you set the selling price, whatever you want. We just keep a flat $4 per CD sold, and just come by every week and we'll pay you. So I went home to my new website that night and I wrote, you set your selling price at whatever you want because I had to lay the album art on the scanner and Photoshop it and crop it and then fix the musicians spelling mistakes in their own bio and all that kind of stuff. That took about 45 minutes of work per album. So it shows you what I was valuing my time at those days that I thought 45 minutes of my time, that's worth about 25 bucks.
Starting point is 00:50:04 So I'll charge a $25 setup fee to sign up for this thing. And then, ooh, at the last minute, I thought, wait a second. In my mind, 25 and 35, they're in the same brain cell in my head. 25 and 35, those numbers don't feel very different when it comes to cost. $10 is different and $50 is different. But 25, 35, that occupies the same space in the mind. I'm going to make it $35, that will let me
Starting point is 00:50:30 give anyone a discount anytime they ask. Even if somebody's on the phone and upset, I'll say, you know what, let me give you a discount. So I added in that little buffer so I could give people a discount, which they love. So yeah, $35 setup fee, $4 per CD sold.
Starting point is 00:50:46 And then Tim, for the next 10 years, that was it. That was my entire business model, you know, was generated in five minutes by walking down to the local record store and asking what they do. I love that story and simplicity because I think there is an infatuation, a fetishizing of pivoting in the tech startup world that has infected many other types of entrepreneurship where people think like, oh, if I'm not pivoting, I'm not doing something correctly. I should change my business model and my entire customer base every two months. And I don't view that as a virtue. Yes, there are times to change if something isn't working. But if you don't take the time up front to think about that, and then you're constantly chasing the latest sort of fad or whatever appears on the cover of TechCrunch or Inc. Magazine or something like that, it's a recipe for failure for most people. I mean, there's a huge survivorship bias.
Starting point is 00:51:44 I'm just going to rant for a second. There's a huge survivorship bias that I think is important to realize if you're hoping to become an entrepreneur or are an entrepreneur. If you're only reading the cover stories, you're only getting the happy success stories. And for that reason also, I think it's dangerous to idolize people who bet the farm and just happen to pull it off because those are the people who are going to be written about. Much like if you open a Barron's and you look at all of these mutual funds with these spectacular records, well, maybe they just got lucky and all the other ones can't afford to buy ads because they're no longer in existence. And so I think it's very similar. Now, one of the essays that you're best known for is Hell Yeah or No. And this has been extremely important for me to consistently reread or listen to.
Starting point is 00:52:39 How did it come about and what is the what is the gist of that there was a music conference in australia that i had told my friend i would go with her to it wasn't even like the conference themselves were really expecting me it was my my friend ariel hyatt is uh one of the best publicists I know. And she was speaking at that conference and asked if I would come with her as like a co-presenter in her mentor session or something. So I had said yes like six months before. Yeah, sure, Australia. I'm living in New York City. I'm like, yeah, sure. And then once it came close and it was like time to book the ticket, I was like, I don't really want to go to Australia right now. I'm busy with other stuff. And it was actually my
Starting point is 00:53:32 friend, Amber Rhubarth, who's a brilliant musician. I was on the phone with her and kind of lamenting about this. And she's the one that pointed out, she said, it sounds like, you know, from where you're at, your decision is not between yes and no, you need to figure out whether you're feeling like, fuck, yeah, or no. And I said, yeah, that's, that's really what it comes down to, right? Because the idea is, if you're feeling anything less than like, oh, hell, yeah, I would love to do that. Oh my God, that would be amazing. If you're feeling anything less than that, then just say no. Because most of us say yes to too much stuff. And then we let these little mediocre things fill our lives. And so the problem is, when that occasional big, oh my God, hell yeah, thing comes along, you don't have enough time to give it the attention that you should because you've said yes to too much other little half-ass kind of stuff, right?
Starting point is 00:54:35 So once I started applying this, my life just opened up because it just meant I just said no, no, no, no, no, to almost everything. But then when the occasional thing came up, that I was really like, you know what, that would be awesome. Then suddenly, I had all the time in the world. And you know, people say this, I'm sure you know, every time people contact you, every time people contact me, they say, you know, look, I know you must be incredibly busy. And I always think like, no, I'm not. Because I'm in control of my time. I'm on top of it. Busy to me seems to imply like out of control. You know, like, oh my God, I'm so busy. I don't have any time for this shit. To me, that sounds like a person who's got no control of their life. Yeah, no control and unclear priorities. Yes, exactly.
Starting point is 00:55:29 So you asked how it's applying in my life that still just on the little tiny day-to-day level, even personal things, God, even people you meet, even as I'm dating, you have to do the hell yeah or no approach or people ask you to go to events or God, even, you know, even people asking to do a phone call or anything. I think, you know, am I really excited about that? And, you know, almost every time the answer is no. So I say no to almost everything. And then occasionally something will come up, even a little surprise will be dropped in my lap. Like this thing that happened just two months ago called the Now Now Now Project, which we don't even really need to talk about. The details don't matter so much. But it was just something that popped up that seemed
Starting point is 00:56:14 really interesting and people really wanted. And luckily, because I say no to almost everything, I had the time in my life to make it flourish. So for the last like six weeks, all I did full time, like 12 hours a day, was suddenly work on this brand new thing that showed up because I could. So that's to me the lovely result of taking the hell yeah or no approach to life. Where can people learn more and check out the NowNowNow project? And also I should note in advance that for folks listening, we will also include links to anything we should note in advance that for, for folks listening, um, we will also include links to anything we've mentioned in the show notes, which will be at four hour workweek.com
Starting point is 00:56:51 forward slash Derek all spelled out. Uh, but where can people find more about now? No, no, it's, um, if you go to now, now, now.com, you'll find more about that. It was just in short, I noticed that everybody has an about page on their site and people have a contact page on their site. But usually whenever I'm looking at somebody's personal site, even yours, a big thing I often wonder is like, I wonder what he's up to right now, like working on kind of stuff. And Twitter and Facebook don't answer that, you know, you can see somebody's stream of stuff, but it just kind of says like, okay, here's what I had for dinner last night, you know, here's something in the news I'm mad about, or here's a cute thing I'm sharing. But it doesn't really tell me like, how are you? You know, like, if you and I haven't talked for a year, like, what's up? How you doing? What you working on? So to me, the whole idea of a now page on your site, it's just a general like, here's what's up with me now. So I just had one of those on my site. I had a now page. And then a guy named Gregory Brown saw it, liked it. He put one on his site. And all I did was just retweet him when he told me. I said, cool, I wish everybody had a now page. And like within a few
Starting point is 00:58:05 hours, there were eight more people had a now page. And then within a month, 550 people had a now page on their website. So I just put together now now now.com. It's just like kind of a cute collection of people who have a now page on their website. But anyway, but you know what I mean? The point is, the details don't matter. But like, I'm so glad I had the time to do that. And it was only because I say no to almost everything that I was able to just the best email you ever wrote with the Japanese boxing specialist and so on. And one of the paragraphs that I put here, for those people interested, it's just the most successful email I ever wrote, but it's everywhere online. And it reads, stranger still at its largest, Derek spent roughly four hours on CD Baby every six months. He had systematized everything to run without him. And feel free to correct that if it needs to be corrected. But
Starting point is 00:59:12 assuming that's roughly true, what were some of the most important decisions or realizations that made that possible? Hmm. I love the timing for when I read four hour work week, because it was actually just after I had done this like complete delegation of everything. Um, that it was feeling the pain from everything having to go through me, right? Like it was, it was my business, right? A hundred percent, no investors, no nothing. It was me. And so I hired people to help me. It was all me, me, me. So four years into it, it was growing. It was really taking off. I had 20 employees, but still almost everything went through me. And it made my day kind of miserable because I'm a real like introverted focused kind of person. I love to just sit down for 12 hours and do one thing without distraction.
Starting point is 01:00:10 You're an INTJ Myers-Briggs. Yep. Are you? I'm 100% INTJ. Yeah. So I hated going to the office and being distracted every five minutes with my employees asking me questions. So that's what I just felt such pain about this. Like, I hate this. But I really, literally, man, I booked a flight to Kauai, I believe. And I was going to move to Kauai and not give my employees my phone number. And literally move. I don't mean like take a vacation. I mean like I am now going to be running,
Starting point is 01:00:48 or I'm going to be the owner of CD Baby on a little island in Hawaii and you guys just figure out your own damn problems. Because I was just having so much psychic pain about this. But then luckily, with lovely coincidence, that night that I booked the flight to Hawaii, I watched the movie Vanilla Sky. And in Vanilla Sky, Tom Cruise is like the owner of this big publishing company, but he gets all caught up with these crazy women and gets too overwhelmed with his life
Starting point is 01:01:19 and focusing on his own happiness or unhappiness and all that. And pretty soon his company has just wrestled away from him. And I thought, oh, I don't want that to happen. I don't want to just plug my ears, close my eyes, run away, and have my company taken away from me. I need to deal with my problems instead of running from them. So I canceled the trip to Hawaii and went into work the next day and decided to fix this thing.
Starting point is 01:01:52 So then next time somebody asked me a question, I gathered everybody around. I said, okay, everybody, Tracy just asked me, Derek, what do we do when a guy on the phone says he wants a refund? I said, okay, everybody stop working, everybody gather around. Tracy asked what we do if somebody wants a refund. Here's not only what we do, but here's why. Here's my philosophy.
Starting point is 01:02:13 Whenever anybody wants a refund, we should always give it to them. And I would just explain not just the what to do, but the why. It was constantly communicating the philosophy to get to the core of it. And I think you mentioned this in back in four hour work week, there's almost nothing that really has to be you. Like you can almost get kind of AI and figure out how your brain works, how your decision making process works, and just teach it to other people. So that other people can do it. And yeah, that's what I did for every single thing that ever came my way. I would gather everybody around, explain the philosophy behind it, why we do things this way, why I'm about to say what I'm about to say.
Starting point is 01:02:56 And now here's what I think we should do. Do you understand why now? Please write it down. But it was also important that I taught it to multiple people, not just one and had them write it down. And then the cool thing is, I wasn't doing the hiring anymore at the company, I had taught other people how to do the hiring. So soon, my employees were doing the hiring. And then they were teaching new people how to do this thing from the book. And yeah, so by, let's see, so that really started four years into the company. It was six months of difficult work to really make myself unnecessary. But then my girlfriend at the time decided to go to film school in LA. So decided to follow her down there. So I moved down to LA to be with her, which was a nice symbolic way to let the company know like,
Starting point is 01:03:39 you're on your own. I'm still the owner. And in fact, so there's one little caveat to the thing where you said that I was working on CD Baby for four hours a year or whatever you said. Yeah, four hours, sorry, six months. the bureaucracy stuff that I had reduced down to almost nothing, like a few minutes a week. But what I was doing from 7am to midnight every single day was programming like the future of CD baby. And that's just the stuff that I loved doing. So it was just, it was about making my life the way I wanted it to be working on the stuff that I wanted to be working on and not doing the stuff I didn't. Which I'm glad you brought that up because I want to clarify something that is a common
Starting point is 01:04:27 misconception related understandably to the title of the four-hour work weekend. And it's like the single largest blessing and curse that is going to follow me for the rest of my life. But it's a catchy title. Yes, I tested it on Google AdWords. Yes, I had a great conversion rate. That's why it's that instead of something stupid like lifestyle hustling or the chameleon, blah, blah, blah. I
Starting point is 01:04:49 had a bunch of terrible titles. That one performed best. But the objective is not to be idle. The objective is to control this non-renewable resource called time so that you can allocate it to the things you most want to be doing. So I don't have, in other words, a trouble with hard, I don't have a problem with hard work as long as it is applied to the right things that are determined with some degree of self-awareness and forethought or planning. So that's a sort of PSA, not for you, Derek, because you've read the book,
Starting point is 01:05:19 but for every like dick who stands up at a public Q&A and goes, well, Tim, I just want to ask, do you work four hours a week? And I just want to turn into one of the Fantastic Four and punch him in the neck from 300 feet away. But for everyone who is maybe inclined to stand up and ask that question, there's the answer. Read the book. And I bumped into somebody recently. You mentioned this book with the, I guess, frequently asked questions. And he was like, you should just make, because I told him,
Starting point is 01:05:50 I was like, you know, I try to be really patient. I try to spend a lot of time answering people's questions when they have them. But it's so clear that most people asking questions have not read the fucking book. And they'll be like, can I eat bananas on the slow carb diet? You know, can I eat quinoa after chocolate custard on the slow carb diet? And I'm be like, can I eat bananas on the slow-carb diet? Can I eat quinoa after chocolate custard on the slow-carb diet? And I'm just like, fuck, if you have to ask, the answer is no. And you clearly didn't read it. And he's like, you should just have t-shirts that say, what was it, RTFM? Yeah, read the fucking manual.
Starting point is 01:06:28 But alas, I'll, uh, I'll cut that, that scree a little short. The, the book itself, I want to get, uh, dig into some specifics with this, this manual, uh, this rule book. When you had multiple people write it down, how did you then put together a resource that could be shared with new hires and so on. Actually, I think we put it on a wiki inside, but honestly, most of it was just word of mouth kind of legend inside. Like there were a few internal stories, kind of like the Zappos pizza store you just told. The one I always heard was Nordstrom's. There's some legend about a guy buys a shirt from Sears and it gets like burnt up in a fire and he goes to Nordstrom's to return it and they give him his money back. Like they have like such a liberal return policy that they'll even let you return burnt stuff from another store. And so a legend like that will travel down
Starting point is 01:07:25 and it carries the philosophy inside of it. So it's almost like a little story like that can replace 20 pages of an employee handbook. Totally agree. Yeah. It's an aphorism or it's a story. Yeah. Exactly.
Starting point is 01:07:42 Fable. So there were quite a few of those inside CD Baby, especially for the early people would see the decisions that I had made and the people that I had given all their money back in case anything went wrong or just talking to me in the conversations and getting my philosophies and the early employees at CD Baby really got it and then they would spread it to the new people on the so if we flip from book writing to book reading uh you have a page on your site sivers.org forward slash book i'll link to it in the show notes i think it's book correct me if the url is wrong but you have notes on more than 200 books you appear to be a voracious reader how do you select the books you read and how do you read them okay i select i really i let um usually large numbers of people decide meaning like lots and lots of five-star reviews on Amazon, right? Occasionally, somebody that I really respect and that knows me will tell me, you need to
Starting point is 01:08:53 read this book. And even if it's had no reviews on Amazon, I'll just trust them. But for the most part, I tend to go for things that I've seen lots of rave reviews. Then I browse through the description on Amazon. Then I look at the review, actually read the reviews people have said, and it really sounds like something, okay, this sounds worth my time. Because I don't read fast, and I don't try to read fast. I like to sit and ponder as I'm reading. So when I'm committing to a book, yeah, that's 20 or 30 hours often. So I don't take it lightly. So yeah, I tend
Starting point is 01:09:24 to go with lots of Amazon reviews, but then I also give up quickly. So I don't take it lightly. So yeah, I tend to go with lots of Amazon reviews, but then I also give up quickly. So if like chapter three, if by chapter three, I'm not really into it, I just ditch it. And you don't even see those on my site. So I've ditched almost as many as you see there. And I just don't write them up. I just delete them on the Kindle and move on. So, but here's the interesting thing is, well, okay, there's a couple interesting things. So years ago, actually it was around 2007 when I first read 4-Hour Work Week. I was living in London, even though CD Baby was still like up and running back in Portland, Oregon, just because I wanted to experience the world. I was living in London at the time.
Starting point is 01:10:00 And actually, you know, it's funny. I don't know if I ever told you this cute story. It was my friend, Arielle Hyatt, who I mentioned earlier, that told me about you and the four hour work week, but she told me a little fable about you. So I can't remember if I ever confirmed this with you. We'll find out. We'll find out right now. I think at the time she was going to some kind of like mastermind seminar by one of those like how to be a millionaire kind of guys. And apparently, you know, like five or six of those how to be a millionaire kind of guys held some big mastermind thing in Hawaii or something. And you were supposed to be there. And you didn't show. And I think like Robert Kiyosaki and people like that were there. And you were supposed to be there, but you didn't show up until the third day where you showed up like covered in mud because you had just on a whim decided to try sleeping in a tree or something like that.
Starting point is 01:10:53 The legend goes. And she told me about the four-hour work week. But basically like in this context of this guy, Tim, that doesn't give a fuck about convention. And it totally sounds like you're the kind of guy that is doing things the way that you do it, because you don't give a fuck about convention either, and you should read his book. So that was like, yeah, I think it wasn't even available in England at the time. I had to go. I think the first time I got four-hour workweek was some, like, illegal PDF download of it off of BitTorrent kind of thing. That's how it happens a lot.
Starting point is 01:11:28 So that story, I believe, is true. So I remember this particular event in Hawaii around the time that the book came out, or maybe a year afterwards, within the year following publication. And I remember going to Hawaii and realizing that I wanted to explore Hawaii as opposed to sitting in the conference room. So I rented a car and ended up finding a bed and breakfast where this house was built in the trees. This is totally true. But it wasn't available or it wasn't on the market. And the caretaker ended up being this very attractive woman. And I said, well, is there anything that I can do to be able to sleep in this treehouse?
Starting point is 01:12:16 Because I'm really obsessed with this idea. And it looks like Jurassic Park here with these prehistoric looking plants. And she had a ditch that needed to be dug or something. And so I did that and did all this manual labor. Then I ended up being able to stay in the tree house. And I think that it was on the Hana, I want to say the Hana Highway, if I'm getting that right. Just spectacular. I think it was in Maui.
Starting point is 01:12:41 And so I did show up to the event late, like a tank top and these absurdly now, even to me, embarrassing, like, European short shorts. I don't know why. And, yeah, that's a true story. Our legend is true. Yeah, confirmed. It's so funny. I forget what tangent we were on. Oh, we were talking about how you read books.
Starting point is 01:13:04 Ah, okay. we were on oh we were talking about we were talking about uh how you read books ah okay so right around that time i i've been reading books voraciously for years and and people often ask about like mentorship and did you have any mentors and i say well don't books are my mentors like books guide almost everything i do like the stuff i've learned from books totally guides my life. So I realized that I would love a book while reading it. And maybe it would still echo with me for a few weeks after, but two years later, I couldn't even remember if I had read it or not. And I thought, that's really a shame. I remember at the time, that book meant a lot to me. Why is it now two years later, I've forgotten everything? I said, no, no, no, that's not good. So what I started doing in 2007 is every book I read, I would keep
Starting point is 01:13:50 a pen in hand and I would underline my favorite sentences, circle my favorite paragraphs, write notes in the margins. And then after I was done reading the book, I would put aside like two hours to open up a blank text file and type out everything into a plain text file. So that I could, knowing that plain text files are about the most permanent, long lasting format there can be, they will work on everything. You can read them on phones or new devices we haven't even thought of yet. We'll always be able to read plain text files. So I started doing this for every book I read and then I would review my notes later. So every time I'm, say, just eating breakfast or something for 10 minutes, I'll pull up one of the
Starting point is 01:14:29 notes from a previous book I read and just kind of re-review it. Sometimes kind of stop, take a sentence that means a lot to me right now, open up my diary and write about that for a while, like really internalize. Basically, I wanted to memorize every lesson I had learned in every one of these books. So that's what I started doing. I even started putting them into spaced repetition systems, and that didn't really work out too well, because I wasn't sure how to formulate that knowledge
Starting point is 01:14:56 into a Q&A flashcard kind of format. You're using a super memo or something like that. Exactly. Anki. Anki, side note for people, means rote memorization in Japanese. Really? A-N-K-I. Exactly. Anki. drive just for my eyes only. And I thought, you know, why don't I just put them on my website? If the publishers tell me to take them down, I will, but maybe it's of use to people. So yes, Sivers.org slash book. What you're seeing is all of my detailed book notes I've taken since 2007. If you were to, and this may be a very difficult question to answer, but to suggest
Starting point is 01:15:41 five to start with, or so, I mean, I'm just throwing out a random number, but to suggest five to start with. Or so. I mean, I'm just throwing out a random number. But if you were to suggest some books to start with at Sivers.org forward slash book. And by the way, this is not a setup for my own book. Oh, no, no, no. God, wouldn't that be cheesy? Yeah.
Starting point is 01:16:02 First, the four-hour workweek. Second, see rule number one. No. So, I've actually already answered the question for you because once I posted them on my site, I realized I should give them a 1 to 10 rating because I knew this is the next question people are going to ask. Well, which ones would you recommend? So, I give every book a 1 to 10 rating because I knew this is the next question people are going to ask is, well, which ones would you recommend? So I give every book a one to 10 rating. And it's when you go
Starting point is 01:16:29 to Sivers.org slash book, it's already sorted for you with my top recommendations up top. And I think it's, you know what? I hadn't told you this either. Back in 2008 or nine, you and I were sitting down the hill from your house, that local coffee shop, and we were talking about the Charlie Munger book, that big thick black one. Oh, Seeking Wisdom. Seeking Wisdom, yeah. From Munger to Darwin, or maybe the other way around, by Peter Bevelin. That's it, yes. That's a fascinating book.
Starting point is 01:17:06 Well, I'm glad to have turned you on to it. Oh, yes, I appreciate it. So after turning you on to that book, I remember we were talking about the books that changed our life. And you told me, I think, was it The Magic of Thinking Big? Yeah, that's right, David Schwartz. I have it face out on my shelf in my living room so that I can see it constantly. Okay. So when you told me that the magic of thinking big made such a big difference to you, I think like the next week I picked it up and I read it and it did nothing for me.
Starting point is 01:17:37 It has to catch you at the right time. Exactly. And so that's why. And it's also one of those books, just sorry, I'm getting defensive, but it's one of those books that I read in around 2000, maybe a year or two after college when I was in a shitty, you know, 100 plus hour a week job where I'm sleeping under my desk and sitting in the fire exit because that's the only place they can fit me. But yeah, it has to find you at the right time. Exactly. And so there have been people that I tell about how Tony Robbins' Awaken the Giant Within totally changed my life.
Starting point is 01:18:09 And I give it to friends and they go like, eh, it did nothing for me. So you're right. It does matter when you read a book. Even I noticed on a specific subject, I read and loved Stumbling on Happiness. Loved that book. And so I read like two or three more books on the subject of the study of happiness. And by the time I got to the third one, I forget what it's called right now, maybe happiness project or something like that.
Starting point is 01:18:36 Whatever the third one I read was, I remember flipping through the book quickly, like, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, I know, I know, I know I got it. And so I gave it a really bad rating on my website and somebody emailed me later going, Hey, that book changed my life. I can't believe you get it, gave it a two out of 10 rating. And I looked again at my notes and I thought, you know, it's actually probably a really good book. I just read it at the wrong time because I had just read two other books on that subject. And so, yeah, exactly. Just in a different order, it might've been a 10. Exactly. If I would have read that one before stumbling on happiness, which I gave a 10 to, you know, then I would have given that one a 10 and stumbling on happiness might have been like, yeah, yeah, yeah, I know this stuff already. Stumbling on happiness is a is a is a great book.
Starting point is 01:19:15 I think that it's for those people who are familiar with the term that I use in the four hour work with the deferred life plan. So in other words, sort of saving and working in order to retire at some point in the future, maybe 10, 20 years down the road, 30 perhaps, to redeem all of that toil for some reward, like sailing around the world in a sailboat. Stumbling, always forget is it something on or upon happiness stumbling on happiness stumbling on happiness by daniel gilbert is that right yeah uh is a great reality check for that type of i think extremely risky prone to failure uh deferred life planning yeah so i i gotta tell you so we haven't really talked about this yet, but this is so up your alley
Starting point is 01:20:07 or your listeners alley or for people who are into books will appreciate this. So a lot of my friends, actually, I don't think any of my friends are as into reading as I am. Okay, a couple are, but most aren't. And so whenever I tell them
Starting point is 01:20:22 about some amazing book I've read, the gist I get from my friends is like, well, just tell me what to do. Right. Give me the index card. Yeah. Yeah. Like they don't want to read the book. And so my friend Jeff is a smart guy.
Starting point is 01:20:37 I mean, he's a lawyer. He's smart. But he just looks at me with these tired eyes and he just says like, I'm not going to read the book, dude. Like just you can stop pushing it on me. It's just never going to happen. He said, just tell me what to do. He said, I trust you. I like you. You know me. So tell me what to do. And I realized that if you trust the source, you don't need the arguments. That's so much of a book is arguing its point, but often you don't need the argument. If you trust the source, you can just get the point. So, after reading, you know, taking detailed notes on 220 books on my site, I realized that distilling wisdom into directives is so valuable, but it's so
Starting point is 01:21:20 rarely done. In fact, the only time I can think of that it was done was Michael Pollan with his three books in a row about food, each one getting shorter and shorter. I think the first one was, was it like Omnivore's Dilemma? Omnivore's Dilemma, yeah. Which was big. So I know that you're the kind of guy that would... It's a great book, but also, I mean, there are like 70 pages on corn production in the U.S., and most people just drop out.
Starting point is 01:21:50 Even I was like, God, my eyes are glazing over here, but I know there's some good stuff coming, so I'll slog through it. But yes, a very great book, two to 300 page book, I believe. I forget the name of that one. Might have been In Defense of Food, maybe. That sounds right. Yes, thank you. So even that one, I remember somebody telling me I should read it and me looking at it going like, I don't know if I really want to read 300 pages about food. But then a year later, he put out a teeny tiny little book called Food Rules. I think that's what it's called. And it's like, you basically can read the whole thing while just standing in the bookstore. It's he took the energy and the effort to compress everything he's learned
Starting point is 01:22:43 into very succinct directives. And that's what it's, you know, sentences that tell you what to do. Do this, do that, or don't do that. If your grandmother wouldn't recognize it as food, don't eat it. And his tagline for that book, the popular phrase was, eat food, mostly plants, not too much. And I so admired that. I got inspired by the effort it takes to distill the blah, blah, blah, blah, blah down into the specific sentences for the people that just aren't going to read that 900-page book, right? Like, probably all of that
Starting point is 01:23:22 same information is in the 900-page book, but we just have to realistically admit that most people will never read the 900-page book. So, as I'm reading these 300-page books, 220 of them, very often there will be some, like, brilliant, amazing, important point on, like, page 290. And I feel a little sad that almost nobody's going to read that. Like, I wish that these little tiny points were extracted, like without all of this surrounding argument. So especially, okay, I'll admit this was also sparked by the idea of when I had a kid and I thought like, I might not be alive when he's my age, or even when he's 19, I might die before he gets older. How could I compress everything I've learned that I think he should know into a real succinct format
Starting point is 01:24:15 that he will definitely read? And then, of course, then I thought, and you know, other people will read too. So I got onto this idea of the Do This Project, which is instead of talking around a subject, just giving directives saying do this, do that, don't do this, don't do that. Which is kind of funny because it feels very presumptuous, right? Like, who am I to tell others what to do? But then I think, well, who am I not to, right? It's useful. So get over myself. Kind of like you asked about like, you know, me on stage when I was 18, what was the biggest lesson learned? Like, this isn't about me. People aren't here about me. They're here for their own gain.
Starting point is 01:24:57 Even, you know, that, oh, you asked about my advice to TED speakers. That's my main advice to TED speakers. It's like, people aren't here to see you and your life story. People come to TED or watch TED videos to learn something. So just speak only about what is surprising and skip everything else. But anyway. If people could talk, if people could start with one of your talks, I know I'm interrupting for a second, but which talk would you suggest as a starter? My favorite one is the one, I think on the TED site, it is called Weird or Just Different. I call it the Japanese addressing system.
Starting point is 01:25:36 And I actually know what that means. Yeah. Yeah. It can be so confusing, but yeah. Until somebody explains it to you and then you realize like, oh, it's just a different way of thinking. here i'll just give you a little teaser the the the talk is only three minutes long so you go to ted.com and search for derrick zivers and it's called weird or just different but the little teaser is is it blew my mind when i found out that in japan they don't the reason
Starting point is 01:26:03 the streets don't have names is because they think of the streets as the empty, unnamed spaces, because the blocks are the things that have names. The blocks are the piece of land with houses on them. That's what's important. Whereas in America and most of the world, if you say, what is the name of that block? People will look at you weird, like, well, this is Oak Street. This is Third Avenue. What do you mean? And they say, well, what is the name of that block? People will look at you weird, like, well, this is Oak Street. This is Third Avenue.
Starting point is 01:26:26 What do you mean? And they say, well, what is that block called? You say, that doesn't have a name. We don't name our blocks. We name our streets. The blocks are just the unnamed spaces in between named streets. So in Japan, it's the opposite. The streets are the empty, unnamed spaces in between named blocks. So I realized that how many things in life actually work just as well,
Starting point is 01:26:48 the complete opposite way we're used to thinking of them. Both ways are correct. So anyway, that's the idea. But, but the, we were talking about directives. Yes.
Starting point is 01:26:57 And the advice you give Ted speakers is just how I took us off track. Yeah. So go ahead. No, no, I was going to ask, and I'm not trying to cut this short. I'm just so I don't forget to ask, where can people find the directives? Only in this podcast. No, it's true.
Starting point is 01:27:15 I haven't done anything with it publicly. I, at first, I thought I was going to make this into a big keynote speech I was doing at a conference, the World Domination Summit Conference in Portland. I spent four months of full-time work from like 7 a.m. to midnight for four, you know, seven days a week for four months in a row, just re-reading all 220 book notes, extracting or trying to turn all of this advice or this knowledge, this wisdom, trying to turn it into directives. Because a lot of it almost never is in the directive format already. People talk around a subject. They talk about findings and research. But it takes some real effort, kind of like the old philosophers.
Starting point is 01:28:01 You've read the Stoicism book, The Guide to the Good Life? Yes, I have. I have that up on my living room wall as well. So, in that book, he says, right in the intro, he said, if you ask a modern person who calls themselves a philosopher, what should I do with my life? He said, get, you know, sit down and get comfortable because they will tell you, well, it depends what you mean by what. And it depends what you mean by do. And really, it depends what you mean by life. Or really, maybe it depends on what you mean by my life. He said, people are talking around the issue so much these days. But he said, back in 600 BC,
Starting point is 01:28:41 if you would have asked one of these philosophers, what should I do with my life? They would sit down and tell you exactly what to do with your life. Do this, don't do that. Pursue this, don't pursue that. So I was really inspired by that intro too. So the idea was, now how can I go back through all of these amazing books I've read and compress all of this wisdom into specific directives. So it took me four months of work to come up with the following, like, 18 sentences. Do you want to hear them? I do want to hear them.
Starting point is 01:29:14 I'm excited. I'm super excited about this. So this was going to be a 35-minute long keynote speech, and it turned out to be a horrible 35 minute long talk, but it's entertaining for about three minutes. So here's the three minute version. Okay. First I had fun categorizing them. So this is the category called how to be useful to others. Ready? I'm ready. Number one, get famous.
Starting point is 01:29:47 Do everything in public and for the public. The more people you reach, the more useful you are. The opposite is hiding, which is of no use to anyone. How to be useful to others. Number two, get rich. Money is neutral proof that you're adding value to people's lives. So by getting rich, you're being useful as a side effect. Once rich, spend the money in ways that are even more useful to others. Then getting rich is double useful.
Starting point is 01:30:12 Strong opinions are very useful to others. Those who are undecided or ambivalent can just adopt your stance. But those who disagree can solidify their stance by arguing against yours. So even if you invent an opinion for the sole sake of argument, but those who disagree can solidify their stance by arguing against yours. So even if you invent an opinion for the sole sake of argument, boldly sharing a strong opinion is very useful to others. How to be useful to others? Be expensive.
Starting point is 01:30:40 People given a placebo pill were twice as likely to have their pain disappear when told that that pill was expensive. People who paid more for tickets were more likely to attend the performance. So people who spend more for a product or service value it more and get more use out of it. So be expensive. That's it. Okay, this is this is good stuff. So that's how to be useful to others. That's just one category. I've got a few more if you want to hear them later. Yeah, well, let, what is your favorite of the remaining categories? Maybe we could do one more. Okay, good. If you imagine that I've got a few more that are done in that format, like I've got, this is very stoicism, like I've got a whole category called how to thrive in an unknowable future. It's like prepare for the worst, expect disaster, own as little as possible, choose opportunity,
Starting point is 01:31:25 not loyalty, choose the plan. Let's do that one. I mean, you know I'm a sucker for stoicism. All right. Let's talk about that one. Okay. So how to thrive in an unknowable future. Prepare for the worst. Since you have
Starting point is 01:31:40 no idea what the future may bring, be open to the best and the worst. But the best case scenario doesn't need your preparation or your attention. So mentally and financially, just prepare for the worst case instead. And like insurance, don't obsess on it. Just prepare and then carry on appreciating the good times. How to thrive in an unknowable future. Expect disaster.
Starting point is 01:32:03 If you ever watched a VH1 behind the music, you know that like every single success story had that moment where the narrator would come in and say, and then things took a turn for the worse. So fully expect that disaster to come to you at any time. You have to completely assume that it is going to happen and make your plans accordingly. Not just money, but health and family and freedom. You have to expect it to all disappear. Besides, you appreciate things more when you know this may be your last time seeing them. How to thrive in an unknowable future? Own as little as possible.
Starting point is 01:32:38 Depend on even less. The less you own, the less you're affected by disaster. How to thrive in an unknowable future is choose opportunity, not loyalty. Have no loyalty to location, corporation, or your last public statements. Be an absolute opportunist, doing whatever is best for the future in the current situation, unbound by the past. Have loyalty for only your most important human relationships. How to thrive in an unknowable future? Choose the plan with the most options. The best plan is the one that lets you change your plans.
Starting point is 01:33:12 For example, renting a house is actually buying the option to move at any time without losing money in a changing market. And lastly, how to thrive in an unknowable future? Avoid planning. For maximum options, don't plan at all. Since you have no idea how the situation or your mood may change in the future, wait until the last moment to make each decision. Which of these have you most
Starting point is 01:33:37 concretely implemented in your own life? From this category? Oh God. I really internalize this category it's the whole way i see the world like if you look inside my head you'd think i was a little nuts and just that i i'm just always expecting everything to disappear even as i'm like i step outside i'm living in new zealand. And I step outside, it's just gorgeous, surrounded by nature's blue skies. And I, I just inhale and I think like, yep, this is all going to disappear. This is all going to go to shit. Pollution's going to wreck this all. But I don't think that in like a awful doom and gloom way. You can tell I'm not, you know,
Starting point is 01:34:19 Eeyore. But it's just part of my appreciation for everything now and every person I know. And even just my health, even just God, when I like stand up in the morning and I'm like, you know, I just, I wake up full of energy. I think, yeah, in another couple of decades, that's not going to happen anymore. I really appreciate this. So yeah, it's more of just a deep mindset. It's a practical, I give a short five minuteminute talk called Practical Pessimism.
Starting point is 01:34:49 I think it was just- Yes. Yeah, Stoicism as a Productivity System. I talked about this because I think it's so important that not to be brainwashed into looking at everything with rose-colored glasses because it is not always a constructive exercise. In fact, it can very much be the opposite. And I, the reason, one of the primary reasons that I'm fasting right now, I mean, I'm eight days into a target of 10, I'm getting a little, little woozy today, but all things mostly manageable is, uh, and I'm also, this is what I haven't mentioned to you, also unshaven, also wearing mostly the same clothing, pants, jacket, et cetera, all week long.
Starting point is 01:35:29 And the reason for that is actually in your – what you just said reminded me a lot of Marcus Aurelius' meditations, which were the Emperor of Rome's wartime journal, never intended for publication, but it would always start with like, today you are going to meet rude, ungrateful, arrogant people, and this is how you're going to contend with it. And it was, it seems very depressing until you realize that he was setting a, creating a mindset that could deal with those worst case scenarios if they presented themselves. And similarly, Seneca, who's a very controversial Stoic, but nonetheless, my favorite to read. And I have a huge, like 30 hours of audio coming out related to Seneca shortly. But one of my favorite passages from Seneca is one that reads, and I'm going to masquer this, but it's paraphrased.
Starting point is 01:36:27 Set aside some time each month where you subsist on the scantest affair, the roughest of dress, et cetera, et cetera, et cetera, asking yourself all the while, is this the condition I so feared? And so not only are you mentally preparing yourself by visualizing the worst case scenario, you're actually practicing, you're rehearsing poverty or lack of variation, or in my case, no food. I've done this before with say rice and beans for five days. And you're like, okay, it cost me $2 a day or less to eat. And I feel fucking fine. And in fact, not having the paradox of choice, having to go to the Thai restaurant and pick from 150 items
Starting point is 01:37:11 that all have the same six fucking ingredients, that's been really relaxing and so on and so forth. Uh, so that's maybe a slight digression, but, um, I've always appreciated that about how you have designed your life. On the books. So I want to give – I'm sorry. Go ahead. Actually, before we close out this subject, I have to just give you the one little punchline ending to these directives. Because there were some that didn't fit into this do this format, do that. And I didn't want to start making lists of what not to do because I liked the idea that every single sentence should be actionable, right? And
Starting point is 01:37:49 so don't do this, don't do that, didn't feel actionable enough to me. So I had fun kind of like, you know, our mutual hero, Charlie Munger, had a speech once that I think he gave at USC about like, how to be a failure. And it was like, so I made a category that was called how to stop being rich and happy. So this is like after you're rich and happy, how to stop being rich and happy. And I thought you'd appreciate this first one. Prioritize lifestyle design.
Starting point is 01:38:19 You've made it. So it's all about you now. Make your dreams come true. Shape your surroundings to please your every desire. Make your immediate gratification the most important thing. How to stop being rich and happy. Chase that comparison moment. You have the old thing.
Starting point is 01:38:38 You want the new thing. Yes, do it. Be happy for a week. Ignore the fact that happiness comes only from the moment of comparison between the old and new. Once you've had your new thing for a week and it becomes your new normal, then just go seek happiness from another new thing. Yeah, you get the idea. No, I do. And I agree with the first point. I mean, people might think that I wouldn't, but I've been doing a lot of reading and practice with meditation and so on. But if you read, say Tara Brock or,
Starting point is 01:39:11 uh, which has a, she has a fantastic book called radical acceptance, which I highly recommend to people who are type a in particular, but, uh, most suffering actually, Tony Robbins would say this too. I attended my first live event a few weeks ago, which was very fascinating and a lot of fun, but that most suffering comes from a focus on me, on the self. And as soon as you, you know, I received a piece of advice a few, maybe five years ago from someone. They said, if you're having trouble making yourself happy, just make someone else happy. Yeah. And it sounds so cliched, but it's actually really pragmatic. And it makes me think of this, something simple that I've been doing that, uh, Gabrielle Reese, Gabby Reese, uh, who was on this podcast with Laird Hamilton, uh, both very famous athletes
Starting point is 01:39:58 and they're married. And she said, go first. And all she meant by that was during your day, be first, like if it'd be the first by that was during your day, be first. Like be the first to look at someone and smile. Be the first to look, to walk up to, when you walk up to the barista, ask them how they're doing. Be the first to initiate that. And it's such a simple way to put a smile on people's faces. Not always, but a good portion of the time. And that can change your own state.
Starting point is 01:40:22 Two things on books. Just because you're sharing your methods, I Uh, two things on, on books. I'll just, because you're sharing your methods, I'll share a couple that I've enjoyed. One is on Amazon. I will look at the four star most, uh, for if it has a sufficient critical mass of say five stars to be worth looking into. Uh, if that's how I'm filtering, then I will look at the most helpful, uh, if that's how I'm, I'm filtering, then I will look at the most helpful, uh, critical reviews that are, that are four and three star. Uh, in addition to that, I will go to, I think it's just kindle.amazon.com and I will read the public highlights. So I'll take, uh, maybe five minutes to look at the most critical three and four star reviews
Starting point is 01:41:04 because the, the five star and the one star and two star tend to be worthless in a way because they're so one sided. So look at the three and four star most helpful critical reviews. And then I will look at the Kindle highlights. And that is in effect seeing the movie trailer. It's like if you don't like the highlights from the movie trailer, you're definitely not going to like the full feature film, especially when it takes 30 hours instead of one and a half. And,
Starting point is 01:41:34 uh, the reason I started using a Kindle was specifically so that I could export my notes. Yes. As text files. Yeah. And, uh, the, so that's, that's one of the ways that I filter books these days.
Starting point is 01:41:59 But the, the, the question that I always ask that I'd like to ask you, and I think we might have to do a round two sometime because we're probably gonna have to hop off and maybe 10 minutes or so, but what, there's so many questions I want to ask you. Uh, what is the book you've given most as a gift? Geek in Japan. Geek in Japan. Geek in Japan by Hector Garcia, because I'm, I'm fascinated with understanding the mindset of a place, right? Like, I would love to really understand the philosophy of Brazil, India, China, Finland, France, Japan, Thailand. Like, to me, each place seems to have its own cultural norms in how it approaches time or long-term versus short-term thinking or what's precious and should be protected, or human interactions, relationships, dealing with obstacles, conformity versus rebellion, or just, you know, how it approaches people who are unfortunate. So, we think of philosophies like existentialism, stoicism, nihilism, but I'd love
Starting point is 01:42:59 to study Brazilism, Japanism, Thaiism, you know, I really do think of each country's culture as kind of like a working modern applied philosophy. Totally. So, Geek in Japan is written by this Spanish guy who's been living in Japan for 10 years. And while most of the book is kind of like, hey, check out this,
Starting point is 01:43:20 look at that, it has a section in the middle that I think explains the Japanese mindset better than anything I'd heard before. And I'd spent months in Japan over the last 20 years. I've gone there five or six times and I used to play guitar for a Japanese pop star and tour the country. But somehow Geek in Japan made me understand Japan more. So I give that to everyone who's going to Japan. But actually an even better book I've found since then on describing the mindset of a country is called Au Contraire, Figuring Out the French. It's so deep. It explains the mindset so well. I wish there was a book like this about
Starting point is 01:43:56 every country. I highly recommend it. So you listeners out there, if you know of any other books like this that explain the mindset mindset of a country please email me to let me know there is a book and i'm going to rely on the readers as well what is your email if you want to give it out yeah derrick at sivers.org and uh in the comments guys so this all the show notes and everything links to these books will be at 4hourworkweek.com forward slash Derek. But there is a book out there. I want to say Enrico something is the author. But an Italian, I'm pretty sure it was an Italian, effectively writes Geek in America.
Starting point is 01:44:41 But from the standpoint of Italian traveling through the U.S., including the heartland. So that's one. Cool. U S including the heartland. Uh, so that's, that's one. Uh, what's $100 or less purchase has most positively impacted your life in the last six months or recently? Well, I'm such a minimalist that I always avoid letting any new possession into my life. Right. But I took my three-year-old kid to a cafe one morning that had a huge box of toys, little figurines and cars and dolls and monsters. And he was just in the zone for two or three hours, completely engrossed in all these toys. So I was like, yeah, okay, I can't push my minimalism on him. He needs toys.
Starting point is 01:45:21 So that night I went on to eBay and I found someone selling a huge box of old used toys just like that. You know, figurines and cars and stuff. 20 bucks. And endless hours of entertainment since. Best $20 I've spent in a long time. That's awesome. Do you have a favorite documentary or movie? No.
Starting point is 01:45:44 I really don't watch hardly anything. I don't. I mean, relative to the norm, right? I mean, I watch movies, but more kind of for the artistry, the cinematography, and I listen to music, of course, but like, I don't watch TED Talks, or documentaries or TV shows. I also I don't even read read blogs or articles and I don't listen to podcasts. In fact, I listened to my very first podcast two weeks ago. That was the one with you and Tony Robbins. That was like the first time I've ever listened to a podcast because I just have this lovely optimized life where I just wake up and I write, write, write, write, write all day long. I have no commute. I'm never really driving anywhere. So I don't have any downtime like that.
Starting point is 01:46:26 And if I'm outside, I want to hear the birds and the trees, you know, and if I'm working out, I'll either crank up the hip hop or sometimes just enjoy the total silence except for the hardcore sound of the clanking metal plates, you know, so I really just prefer books as my medium of learning and input of information intake. What do Of information intake. What are you listening to now or recently for working out? What music? I've started realizing that I don't know my American history of hip hop. I've always been loosely aware of it, but I recently saw the Chris Rock movie Top 5.
Starting point is 01:47:02 And the running punchline in that movie is like, he goes around like, what are your top five? And people kind of name their top five hip hop artists are the ones that they feel are the most important. And there were some in there I realized like, well, I don't, I've actually, I know who these people are. Of course, we've all heard of KRS-One and Rakim. But it's like, wait, I don't think I actually know their music well.
Starting point is 01:47:22 So I've started giving myself an education in the history of hip hop. And so lately I've been listening to nothing but hip hop, going back to the very beginning, the Wild Style movie and the kind of early stuff and giving myself the chronological history of hip hop. It's been fun. Any favorites so far? I would say Eric B. and Rakim are way up at the top for me. Yes, especially once I understood the context.
Starting point is 01:47:43 When you hear the before and after like right now you can take rakim for example uh i mean sorry you can take him for granted the way that now if you listen to jimmy hendrix you can take what he was doing for granted because people have expanded on that but if you think of like where what people were doing with guitars before jimmy hendrix and after it was just you know mind-blowing and so i think rakim is like that for hip-hop that it's listen to what was going on before him and then he came along was just such a such a whole new approach that's changed everybody since if you could have one billboard anywhere with anything on it what would it say
Starting point is 01:48:20 well my real answer if i was taking that literally is that i would remove all the billboards in the world and ensure that they were never replaced you know like have you ever driven through india you know yeah it's so sad well i haven't driven but on my way to the calcutta er where i spent a week i was briefly looking out the windows. You know, even in these small towns in Kerala, like there's almost no space that is left without advertising. So I really admire those places, like I think Vermont and Sao Paulo, Brazil, that ban billboards.
Starting point is 01:48:58 But I know that that wasn't really what you were asking. So my better answer is, I think I would make a billboard that would say, it won't make you happy. And I would place it outside any big shopping mall or car dealer. So ideally, actually, I think,
Starting point is 01:49:16 you know, it'd be a fun project is to buy and train thousands of parrots to say, it won't make you happy. It won't make you happy. And then you let them loose in the shopping malls and super stores around the world. That's my life mission. Anybody in anybody with me?
Starting point is 01:49:32 Let's do it. Yeah. We'll make you happy. Uh, very stoic, very stoic, uh, which does not mean you can't have joy in your life,
Starting point is 01:49:42 but it's, I think stumbling on happiness is a great one for people to peruse. Do you have notes on stumbling on happiness? Yeah, that's on there. All right, great. So we will link to that.
Starting point is 01:49:54 Okay. Last effectively last question. I'll give one or two more. And then I think we might have to sometimes soon talk about around two if people are interested. So if you'd like to hear more with Derek, please let me know at T Ferris on the Twitter T F E R R I S S. And you can loop in at Sivers as well. What advice would you give your 30 year old self and, and place us if you
Starting point is 01:50:16 would for where you were at 30 and what you were doing at 30? Well, let i had just i had just started cd baby at 30 but i think uh i think the the biggest advice i would give to my younger self or more like knowledge learned like hey younger self you should know this now is that women like sex i didn't know that until i was 40 i think i didn't get that i think through through, you know, like teenage movies or whatever, we're kind of taught the opposite. That's like, you know, men always want sex and women don't. I don't know why the media portrays it like that. But later I found out that's not true. But I think the more interesting answer is that my advice to my 30-year-old self would be don't be a donkey.
Starting point is 01:51:04 What does that mean? Well, I meet a lot of 30 year olds that are trying to pursue many different directions at once, but not making progress in any, right? And then, or they get frustrated that the world wants them to pick one thing because they want to do them all. And I get a lot of this frustration, like, but I want to do this and that and this and that. Why do I have to choose? I don't know what to choose. But the problem is, if you're thinking short term, then you're acting as if you don't do them all this week, that they won't happen. But I think the solution is to think long term, to realize that you can do one of these things for a few years, and then do another one for a few years and then another.
Starting point is 01:51:45 So what I mean about don't be a donkey is you've probably heard the fable about, I think it's Buridan's donkey, who it's a fable about a donkey that is standing halfway in between a pile of hay and a bucket of water. And he just keeps looking left to the hay or right to the water, trying to decide, hay or water, hay or water. He's unable to decide, so he eventually falls over and dies of both hunger and thirst. So the point is that a donkey can't think of the future. If he did, he'd clearly realize that he could just go first drink the water and then go eat the hay. So my advice to my 30-year-old self is don't be a donkey. That you can do everything you want to do.
Starting point is 01:52:31 You just need foresight and patience. Right? So say, like, for somebody listening, if you're 30 years old now, and say you have, like, five different things you want to pursue, right? Well, then you can do each one of those for 10 years and you'll have them all done by the time you're 80. You're probably going to live to be 80. So it's ridiculous to, I mean, it sounds ridiculous to plan to the age of 80 when you're 30, right? But it's a fact that's probably coming. So you might as well take advantage of it.
Starting point is 01:53:01 It's like, use the future. Then that way you can fully focus on one direction at a time without feeling, you know, conflicted or distracted because you know that you'll get to the others in the future. And I think you'd also, uh, just to build on that, I agree. I think most people, and this is not something I've thought up on my own, but underestimate, they overestimate what they can achieve in a day or a week. So they have 20 items on their to-do list, but they underestimate what they could achieve in a year or even two years. And the way that, for instance, if you look at a lot of what I've done, much of which ended up being a result of accidental discoveries, but you had the book career,
Starting point is 01:53:46 but then you had the angel investing start around 2007, 2008. And I treated that as a two-year self-imposed MBA. And it was like, okay, I want to try this and really focus on it for two years. And I'm not going to expect to have any financial return, but just as an MBA, I'm going to sink this amount of cost into it, which was identical to Stanford graduate school of business at the time, and assume that the
Starting point is 01:54:10 network and relationships and lessons I would learn would be worth that two years. And just viewing them as two-year experiments, which I did with the TV also, which did not turn out as ideally as I would have liked. Although I'm very proud of, you know, Tim Ferriss experiment podcast, same thing, right? It wasn't a three-year commitment, but it was also not a one day or one week commitment. It was like, okay, I'm going to do this for at least six episodes. Maybe it takes me six months and then I'll correct course at that point. But, uh, yeah, you do. I think a lot of 30 year olds feel pressured or younger or older for that matter to pursue many, many things in parallel. When if you were just to tweak that slightly and make them serial, the results would be much better.
Starting point is 01:55:01 That's a really hard lesson to learn. We can even say it right now. But it's really tough. I even find that now. Yeah. Yeah. That's a really hard lesson to learn. We can even say it right now, but it's, it's really tough. I even find that now. Yeah. Yeah. It's a constant challenge.
Starting point is 01:55:10 Uh, the, uh, five minute journal, I find very helpful. I've mentioned this before to people, but so I won't belabor the point, but,
Starting point is 01:55:16 um, people can check that out if they want to, or the Pomodoro technique also really helpful. Uh, okay. We are going to wrap this first conversation up for, for our dear public, but do you have any asks or requests of my audience before we close up? Not really. I mean, honestly, the main reason I do interviews like this, like public ones,
Starting point is 01:55:39 instead of you and I just, you know, sitting on the phone and shitting the shit is that, is that I really like the people that I meet through them. The kind of people that would listen two hours into this conversation are my kind of people. So I usually just tell people to just email me, derrick at sivers.org. I read them. I kind of enjoy putting aside a little time each day to read emails, and I answer every single one because I said,
Starting point is 01:56:01 hell yeah or no to the rest of my life, so I've got time to do it. So yeah, that's it. Just feel free to email me if you have any questions or anything, or no to the rest of my life, so I've got time to do it. So yeah, that's it. Just feel free to email me if you have any questions or anything, or just to say hi. Awesome. And for those people who do not want to wait for round two, Derek, you're hilarious. I put out a tweet recently, which was,
Starting point is 01:56:17 what should I ask? What would you like me to ask at Sivers? I'm going to be interviewing him soon. And I couldn't ask any of them because you went online and basically answered all of them on Twitter. So if you search at T Ferris, two R's, two S's, and at Sivers,
Starting point is 01:56:38 you will see, or you could just look at, at my tweet and the various responses. And then Derek's response is to almost all of them. You can get an encore performance. I just had the feeling we probably weren't going to get to all of those questions. So, you know, better to answer them with a tiny punchline. Oh, yeah.
Starting point is 01:56:57 Yeah, I know. No, fantastic. Well, Derek, as always, so much fun to to jam we need to spend more time in person soon and uh thanks so much for taking the time of course thanks all right and everybody listening thank you all for listening redundancy of department redundancy and uh the the show notes as always uh you can find for all episodes of four hour workweek.com forward slash podcast for this episode specifically at four hour workweek.com forward slash Derek.
Starting point is 01:57:38 Hey guys, this is Tim again. Just a few more things before you take off. Number one, this is five bullet Friday. Do you want to get a short email from me? Would you enjoy getting a short email from me every Friday that provides a little morsel of fun before the weekend? And five bullet Friday is a very short email where I share the coolest things I've found or that I've been pondering over the week. That could include favorite new albums that I've discovered. It could include gizmos and gadgets and all sorts of weird shit that I've somehow dug up in the world of the esoteric as I do.
Starting point is 01:58:13 It could include favorite articles that I've read and that I've shared with my close friends, for instance. And it's very short. It's just a little tiny bite of goodness before you head off for the weekend. So if you want to receive that, check it out. Just go to fourhourworkweek.com. That's fourhourworkweek.com all spelled out and just drop in your email and you will get the very next one. And if you sign up, I hope you enjoy it. you

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