The Toast - Bert & Tom: Call Us: Friday, January 12th, 2024

Episode Date: January 12, 2024

Ariana Grande fires back at critics in new song "yes, and?" (19:50)'Southern Charm' star Olivia Flowers admits to hooking up with Thomas Ravenel (Page Six) (26:27)Jessica Simpson pokes fun at her viral Chicken of the Sea mix-up in new ad with daughter Max (Page Six) (35:24)Jelly Roll is Training for His First 5K in May (PEOPLE) (46:50)New England Patriots Name Jerod Mayo as Head Coach Bill Belichick's Successor (PEOPLE) (53:56)The Toast with Jackie (@JackieOshry) and Claudia Oshry (@girlwithnojob) Lean InThe Camper and The Counselor by Jackie OshryMerchThe Toast PatreonGirl With No Job by Claudia OshrySee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Good morning, Millennials! Welcome back to the toast and... And... Happy! Wow, that's a really, really crazy way to start an audio-only episode. Friday, Friday, gotta get down on Friday. Everybody's looking forward to the weekend, weekend. Not only are we looking forward to the weekend, we're looking forward to the long ass weekend. So like let this episode

rain positivity, rain joy. Did you see the video recently of Rebecca Black performing Friday at a concert in like Melbourne? And she. Did you seriously just ask me that question? Of course I've seen that video. But we haven't discussed it it and i'm pretty sure i posted it and i tagged you and you didn't like respond to that because we said a million things back and forth like we never discussed it she kind of like just remixed it she kind of ate that shit up i was gonna say she kind of ate one thing rebecca black is going to do is she's gonna eat that song in particular and she's always putting a new spin on it based on whatever era she's in. Sometimes she goes through like a kind of EDM phase and she released like an EDM version.

Then she's like in like a more of a rocker element, punk vibe. So she does that wherever that kind of the wind takes Rebecca Black. She takes that song with her. It's a great career move for her. I really, I think it's solid. I think it's solid as well. I did see the video. I'm so glad you brought it up. I am so excited to be doing this show with you. I'm, we're, we're an international show. And now I know we always say that as a joke because we have like 11 followers in Canada, but we actually are international right now because I'm out of the country. I am in Mexico. Hola, como estas? Bien,

la tostada. Estoy bien. It's already sitting in front of a surfboard. Is that your surfboard? Yes. You plan on surfing? Yes, it's my surfboard. I'm in my hotel room. I brought my equipment. The decor is very, shall I say, nautical. Yeah. So that explains the surfboard behind me. Shall I say nautical? Yeah. So that explains the surfboard behind me. I'm headed to the beach right after this. Just looking to soak in some sun.

You know, actually, Ben is golfing. Shocker. Which is so crazy, like to golf on vacation. Did he bring his clubs to Mexico? So he didn't bring his clubs, but he's going straight from Mexico to L.A. for work. And he always brings golf always brings golf clothes to LA because I guess that's like how you do business is you golf I don't know that makes a little sense so he has like his whole get up outfit but he doesn't have clubs but the guy said he's golfing with like nobody brings their clubs down to Mexico so they're all just gonna run and it's not like a serious game it's just like for fun okay okay cool cool so I'm gonna

podcast head to the beach read my romance novel and you know take some time for myself before the weekend begins love that make sure you wear sunscreen like well I got a spray tan I got a spray tan so like I will be sitting in the shade oh that's good too yeah yeah yeah it's just time to start staying out of the sun oh I agree as women of a certain age yeah yeah it's time for to start staying out of the sun. Oh, I agree. As women of a certain age. Yeah. It's time for that. I completely agree.

Well, I'm glad you're practicing skin health. And what are you doing this weekend while I'm in Mexico? I have some fun little plans. I'll be in and around the neighborhood having fun. Love that. I'll be seeing friends, having play dates. So cute. So cute. maybe I'll cook a little something something because my cigar wheels I'm off on the week my cigar wheels my meals they don't send me

meals for the weekend so I'm on my own I like that I like it too and it's a good way for me to try and stay on a decent program but also if like I was craving something during the week I can have it over the weekend I could make if I wanted a chili let me ask you a question when Harry has a play date like obviously I know what my experience is because I'm kind of the number one play date date but when Harry has a play date like with a friend like what do they get into it depends on the age of the friend if it's someone his own age it's kind of like parallel play a little bit unless they like know each other really well but if it's just like me hanging out with someone and then like their kid comes right it's like it's parallel play a little bit but then sometimes when he's playing

with older kids and if it's like a group of kids and they have a thing going you know because the older kids know how to play like he kind of just inserts himself into that like the other day he learned how to play duck duck goose stop are kids still playing that game these kids were hot take that's like not a fun game it was cute to watch i i didn't hate it you know what's not a fun game what tag red rover well that game is, like, violent. It is violent and unsafe. I agree. I never liked it as a kid. Like, you would love to be the one, like, running,

but you never wanted to be the one whose hand was about to get broken. Hand broken. Yeah, I agree. Some of those games, like, age well. Some of them don't. Red Rover, Red Rover, Centurny, Redover is definitely one of the worst games. Also, Tag, you're it is like such a it's a game like without rules like i think it's a bad game yeah it's a little all over the place doesn't have much structure a good you know it's a good game hide and seek yes oh what's like the hide and seek like on crack? Is it called like sardines?

I'm not sure. Okay, no, no, Jackie, we used to play with our cousins. And like when it went right, it was really right. Like everyone would hide around the house. Somebody would have to find someone. Or no. Like you would find the person and then you would have to hide with them. And then like the other people come looking and it's like everybody ends up hiding in the same spot till the last person finds you oh what game is that you guys I don't know sounds like

sardines because you pack like sardines yeah I was gonna say I think it's sardines another game that I think really aged well because the last time we played it at Camp Toast it was so fun tug of war oh yeah that is just a classic game battle of brute strength right a true show of strength yeah it's the physics of it could have been played in the caveman era don't need much just just a rope yeah it's so simple i find the best games are the simplest ones where you don't need you know a whole balagan with like equipment and gear you know what you need, Turdy? Your imagination. Oh my God. That's really beautiful. Like for real. It's so true. So true. I miss those times where like my imagination was enough. It's not enough now. Now I need like a cocktail, my vape. By the way, had some cocktails last night,

did not vape. That's like honestly kind of crazy that you're on a beach vacation and not vaping and like, and not in a good way. No, I know I know and to be honest like I am very much of the mind where I'm like okay if I have a cocktail or I'm like you know cocktailing it up and somebody has a vape like if I take a puff it's like not a big deal yeah I made the mistake of like bringing Ben in on this journey with me because he's being like a nut and he's like you can't it will reset you and your addiction like he's being so nuts like I kind of wish I didn't get him involved and I want to tell him to fuck all the way off but he's like real he's right you know didn't I see him with a cigarette last night that's the

thing Ben's like but I can control my addiction like I'm not addicted to nicotine I just like Ben like on vacation will smoke like two cigarettes and he had one last night because everybody else was smoking cigarettes that's so Ben solver um so yeah like okay black kettle pot but he is right about the fact that he's not addicted if you told him he was never having another cigarette he wouldn't even notice right it's not like he's like cigaretteting right when he wakes up right and with a vape i like especially for me like it's a slippery slope like that's how i started vaping like a cocktail and a vape with a vape I like especially for me like it's a slippery slope like that's how I started vaping like a cocktail and a vape yeah yeah so I mean it's good what you're doing cold turkey is really good but like even I if I were on the trip that you're on and like having like I would be vaping

yeah it's a celebration I'm here to celebrate my friends it's a vibe all of like all these people I know are coming from all over the LA New York York, all over. Like it's a celebration I want to enjoy. And like if the opportunity presents itself, like I'm just letting you know, like I will be taking a puff and everyone, including Ben, can eat my fucking ass respectfully. And I'm letting you know I endorse this decision. And I, as long as it doesn't then set you back, if you then go back to like slippery slope,

then I'm going to have to cut you off next time. Of course. But I am going to give you the opportunity to show that I can do it socially. A social casual vapor. But you know what? I have heard, because once I opened up about my journey, so many people told me their experiences, which I found really helpful. A lot of the girlies were like, I gave it up. It was the hardest thing. Did a cold turkey, like a lot of like whatever their reasons were. And then they said, you know, the next time they like slipped up, like a few weeks later, like it was disgusting to them,

which would be so nice. I don't think that's going to happen to me. Also, I'm only 11 days. They were saying like after a month that happened. 11 days, that's like not a lot of days. By the way, have there ever been a longer 11 days in the lifetime of Turdily Freebush? Like I can't. No, that means I was with you less than 11 days ago

yeah that's also crazy that's really crazy how are the stories today good varied um lots of little cute good stories I feel okay about them oh you know what I did last night I started the crown what episode are you on I treated myself and of course, I watched three episodes and I was up super late. But it actually worked out because then I was still up for Charlie's first feeding. And I didn't have to like fall asleep for 30 minutes and then wake up, which is harder. Jackie, I believe I'm at the same. Did what was the thing that happened? Diana just died.

Same. That's what I just want to say. I had one takeaway so far. You know, I mean, I have a lot of thoughts. But just the one thing that I'm taking away is that I don't think enough is made of the fact that Diana was killed by a drunk driver not okay wait not only that I'm so glad you said that not only that because they're always like the British media and the royal family killed her too she was in Paris so it was kind of the French media and not the British media.

Right. I guess you could say like media in general. And yeah, the media hounded her, but they've been hounding her every single day since she got with Charles. Yes, this was a very heightened time and Dodie and his like lackluster security team were not up to the task. But every other time she like was driving through the streets, it's always mayhem and it was okay. I just want to say like, I don't appreciate you putting it on Dodie's security team like they kept telling Dodie what to do and he would not listen I'm sorry I didn't mean Dodie I mean like

Dodie's security like the security that he yeah his umbrella not the but he needed more security in the show and I I'm I'm sure in terms of the actual logistics of the accident it might not have happened that way but how they showed it in the show was like at the point where they went into that tunnel and crashed like no one was around them oh that's not what I got they were being chased and they were driving fast and it was a drunk driver and I feel like it's glossed over that a little bit if it wasn't if the driver weren't drunk there's a very good chance that they wouldn't have crushed he just would have been like typical paparazzi mayhem car chase but he had been drinking he was like glassy eyed and smiling weird and being afraid we're supposed

to spend the night at the ritz yeah so i feel like not that's not as much of a takeaway when it should be. Like, the more, as much as, like, the media needs to be held accountable, like, there should also be, like, you know, mothers against drunk driving. No, it's so true. Who are invested in the story. It's so true. So that was something that I found interesting.

But other than that, I've been enjoying it. And it's just, it's nice to have a great show. I agree. And I'm so glad that we're at the same point in the show to discuss. Yeah, so now if you had any thoughts, you could share them because we're simpatico. My thoughts are developing, obviously. You know, I'm upset because last season, my favorite character was Muhammad Faid.

He was hysterical and honestly, like me, if I ever, you know, inherited billions of dollars, like exactly how we would spend it. Like I relate to him on a human level. Now they're obviously like pitting the whole thing on him. Like everyone was stressed because of him and everything went wrong because of him. Like we took to Paris because of him.

The jet because of him. So I don't like like love that but if that is how it happened like i obviously can't stand yeah i agree it's not he's in his flop era for sure he's in his flop era and like last season i just loved him yeah no but also i feel like you could also put it on dodie too because Because Dodie was like. I'm sorry. When Dodie made the phone call and hung up and then continued to talk, never in my life have I felt so embarrassed for another human being. And the fact that like Diana knew, I was obsessed with that scene. But then I was looking, by the way, I, in the first three episodes, I must have Googled like 10 things. Like a tale of two photographs.

I looked up both of those photographs. The only thing I looked up was the boys photograph. Yeah, no, it was like kind of a loser photograph and stop that was the point I just started looking at pictures of Dodi Fayed because like in the show he's an unbelievable loser and like not someone who could pull Princess Diana I'm sorry in real life like he was hot like I feel like they didn't do him justice like that's not fair yeah yeah no yeah. No, he was like, he seemed like, I mean, it's just a picture, but he seemed like somebody who could tell his own father off, you know? He seemed like strong and.

Oh, not that. I mean, because you just never, you don't know what's on someone's insides. But I do feel like the fact that he's not great looking in the show, like makes it so unbelievable that like him and Diana. Would be together. Oh, actually, the actor kind of looks like him. Sorry, it's a perfect casting. Oh, that's funny.

That is funny. I had another thought about. Oh, I mean, who knows how it all went down? Because like we don't know what their private conversations were like right before, you know, if he really made that call and fakeaked that call and did he even buy the ring I feel like he did because he showed it to someone in the hotel suite and I'm sure like that person is like yes came forward and was like Dodie showed me a ring last night but I just feel like what like if he really wanted to land Diana like he could have if he did other things differently instead of like throwing her into chaos or he even could have thrown her into chaos and then be like I'm the only one who can like

protect you and and hired so much security and like made her life like so seamless and then she would be like I don't have the protection of the royal family like I need someone with copious amounts of money for all this security or else I can't even leave my house and instead he just like kept making things chaotic for her and she was like why am I with this guy who is chaotic even like a moderately smart person in his position could have gotten Diana to fall in love with him or at least make Diana feel like she needed him he fumbled it so hard like how dumb are you yeah yeah just like making everything harsh for her like when they went to get ice cream in Monte Carlo like for me that I got the ick no by the way I actually really related to that sentiment of like her really wanting to go home and then like having to go to Paris and like it was just

like we have to get through the next like 24 hours before I can just like get home and be done with these people you know and like you're on a trip or like you're like yes almost like when you're like remember when you used to have a play date and like you were so over this fucking person you were having a play date with you're like I need to get home like I need to be picked up so I can never see this person again like that feeling of just like needing to be home wanting to be away from these people starting to like fucking hate the people around you I so resonated with that no one like everybody wants a ride on a private jet but like there's no such thing as a free ride like right now we're just stopping in Paris where you're at the whims of whatever the fuck they want to do.

Yep. And you have like no, cause she, she was like, how did I get here? You have no control. You can't be like pilot. Take me to Heathrow. Right. Right. Right.

So it's been enjoyable, but now of course she's passed. So things are going to get crazy, but it was also kind of like a sad time. I mean, it's always a sad time, but like she was at a really good place with Charles. Charles seems like he's in a good place. Like the family just wants the best for Diana. Like the queen said, like, I just want peace. And of course, we don't know if these are direct quotes, but that is the vibe.

Like she's out of the family. Right. You know, I think everybody feels sorry for her that her personal life is like all over the papers. Like nobody wants that for her. And it's just like so sad that that's how it ended agreed okay so with that breaking news from 30 years ago here's the breaking news from today love that in the fast five stories that you need to know and the breaking news from today in

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The once a year sale and clearance, you can score huge savings at Mattress Firm with the can't miss sale and clearance prices. I'm ready. ready okay our first story ari is back with some new music she's firing back at her critics in her new song yes and so ari's long awaited i would say new music is here title song yes and with an accompanying music video and the message of the song is kind of mind your own beeswax she says your business is yours and mine is mine why do you care so much whose I ride who's the yeah there's a lot of like mind your own business why do you care

like stop looking at me like I just want to say talk your talk as somebody who literally like talks about other people's business for my line of work like I do really agree with that statement like in general like just fuck off like why do you care what I do like I agree with the sentiment although I don't follow that particular you know religion um and in terms of the song like I listened to it and I actually didn't hear that lyric I didn't really hear any of the lyrics I she's very like whispery and breathy and I really liked the song actually I just like I didn't get the message because I had a hard time like understanding the lyrics I agree so the first time I listened to it I liked the beat I didn't really know what she was saying but I was enjoying myself and then I watched the music video with

subtitles and there in I got the message and so it's a lot of like why do you care what I do and it's like oh all right of course we care what I do and it's like oh all right of course we care what you do for the same reason you're putting out the song is like the same reason why we care because like you're a big star um but that's fine it's like that's her mo and it did kind of make me feel stupid for caring so she accomplished okay so what she set out to accomplish I don't agree because if she was just like dating some guy and people were like rioting or mad what like those people are fucking losers it's giving like Jelena but with this you know most recent relationship there is like an ethical issue like thing I have an I take issue

with and that's why I feel like everybody cares more than they usually care yeah but I think she did but there was also some messaging of like you don't know this whole story sort of thing which like so tell us to say okay I'm going to read the lyrics okay but before you do I just want to say she is following this sort of formula from thank you next where she samples like a really well-known song like my favorite things was thank you next and this is um vogue oh I was gonna say it sounds like vogue yeah no she sampled it and then she has this like kind of kitschy cute phrase yes and thank you next it's like a formula that works for her with a great music video and we'll see if it works a second time

but like lightning struck the first time like she'll never really be able to recreate like what thank you next did for the culture do you remember that it was like every day she was breaking a spotify record i remember like sitting on your couch babysitting rest in peace theo and he and i were watching the live countdown to watch the music video for that song. I'm so glad Theo lived to see that. Yeah. No, I remember where I was. And I think it's a really good formula.

I think this is a strong song. Not nearly as exciting of a music video, but a little more artistic. But I think like this song won't reach the levels that Thank U, Next did. But it's a fire bop. And I think it'll do well. And very respectable showing from Miss Ari. I agree. Here are the lyrics. So we can know like this is what's on Ari's heart.

Yeah, because honestly, I literally don't even, I don't know any of the lyrics. So sing them to me. In case you haven't noticed, well, everybody's tired and healing from somebody or something we don't see just right. So she's kind of saying like everybody's going through their own shit, like in case you didn't know. Okay. Boy, come on, put your lipstick lipstick on no one can tell you nothing come on and walk this way through the fire don't care what's on their mind and if you find yourself in a dark situation

just turn on your light and be like so this is like the message of the song coming up yes and say that shit with your chest and be your own fucking best friend say that shit with your chest and be your own fucking best friend. Say that shit with your chest. Keep moving like what's next. Yes, and. So there it is. I do feel like it's probably for the best that I couldn't understand the lyrics. I agree.

Because what you just read sounds really dumb, but it popped off in the song, you know? Yeah, but also a sign of a good song is that I already know the melody. It's yes, and say that shit with your chest. Get it, Jack. yeah but also a sign of a good song is that i already have i already know the melodies yes and say that shit with your chest get it jack and be your own fucking best oh oh friend say that shit with your chest keep moving like what's next oh but i agree it's jarianna grande if a songwriter brought me these lyrics i would say you need a new job I would say you're fired yeah but like it's the beat it's music and lyrics right no it's more so like the beat especially with this particular song so it's nice to have Ari back in the fold of like you know pop

girly icons and she said now I'm so done with caring what you think. No, I won't hide underneath your own projections or change my most authentic life. Okay. I mean, it's just kind of like a brave thing to say. Like when you literally stole a married man from like his newborn child. From like his 10-month-old baby. Yeah, yeah. So if there is more to the story, like I think we need to know it. Like for real.

Because she's now accusing us of being like losers who are like, you know, speculating and whatever. But it's like based on what we know, like what real because she's now accusing us of being like losers who are like you know speculating whatever but it's like based on what we know like what you did was crazy so if it's if there's more of the story like let us know but I just want to say like as a strategy of course this whole relationship kind of blew up and people were mad at Ari and she could have gone a number of different ways and the strategy of doubling down and being like yes and right I find to be a very strong one and I respect it I don't dislike it I agree with that you know because what's done is done at least she's still with him like some scandal version she would have broken up with him and like you know been the victim she's like no I did that shit yes and yes and Yes and. Yeah. No, I do.

For sure. But, you know, lest we not forget the ethical dilemma that lies within this saga. Yes. But lest we not forget that we don't know these people and it's their lives, not ours. Yes. And. And. And.

Say that shit with your chest. And. And. Be your own fucking best. When I go to the beach after this, like, I'll put in my AirPods and I'll, like, see how it vibes on a beach. And I'll report back. I think it holds up. I'm sure it does.

Ari doesn't put out bad music. Like, you can say what you want about her. She's a talented vocalist, obviously. But, like, her music pops. Like, she pops her pussy. Like, she puts her whole Ari-essy in that sometimes, sometimes you know do you watch the music video i didn't i didn't even know she released one i'm i'm in mexico i don't know if i um i'm like on this international trip so i don't know if i have like access to the music video here i'm sure you do if we could do a podcast no no no it's like i'm

i'm on like this really remote like elite part of Mexico are you ready for our next story yes okay usually I don't like talking about like reality tv show news if I haven't watched it yet but this was crazy enough that we must discuss so Southern Charm reunion aired last night and Olivia Flowers admitted to hooking up with Thomas Ravenel. Right. And so in the playbook of what's currently going on this season, Olivia was like dating in love with Austin. And then she got really mad at her best friend, Taylor, who slept with Austin. Yeah.

It's not as that as that. Because first of all, even last season, like Olivia and Austin were like a thing. Will they? Won't they? But I don't know that they were ever like fully boyfriend girlfriend and in love like yeah by the way I watched the beginning of last season so I don't know how it progressed but what I remember is that like she really liked him and we didn't even know if he liked her back no and it was like they both liked

each other but they just like couldn't get together and also Austin likes everyone so so true I never saw their relationship as that serious then they filmed their the Southern Charm reunion in New York and I think they had tried to make a go of it and then they like were like you know what we're done for we're not this isn't happening I think Austin ended things with her even though there wasn't much to end but still he was the one who decided no and she went to LA for a little bit to like take some time for herself meanwhile Taylor Ann who is Shep's ex girlfriend at the time and Olivia's best best friend on the show is also very good friends

with Austin and I guess they hooked up during that time that she was in LA and then it's all coming out this season and I think things were looking like Olivia might forgive her because Taylor just seems really genuine even though she keeps fucking up. Like, right. She's just like she can't. Well, she did lie. Like she can't get out of her own way almost. No, it's just it's a very weird.

I've never felt this way about someone who it's like I'm rooting for them and I believe them, but they just like keep doing not the best things and keep lying about it. Now explain to me Thomas Ravenel. OK, no, actually explain to me like Catherine's relationship to Olivia. Like do they have any sort of loyalty towards one another? Yes, so they're very good friends from the show. And so at the reunion last night, it seems like in her own defense. How did it come to light that she hooked up with Thomas?

Did somebody out her? Did she say it? Yes, yes. So at the reunion, Olivia's going in on Taylor for, you know, sleeping with Austin. And then Taylor said, forgive as you would want to be forgiven. And everyone was like, what do you mean by that? And Olivia was like, go ahead and say it.

I already see what you're trying to do. You've been hanging this over. You've been hanging this over my head. I want to see it. Say it. Say it. Oh, I'm obsessed. Andy.

Andy was like, well, just say it like we're here. And Taylor said the whole thomas situation and and he was like everybody just like audibly gasp like i didn't watch it yet but it says all these like beautiful smart sophisticated young women like keep sleeping with thomas rabinelle he's not only is he like, you know, has allegations of sexual abuse, like he's literally not even handsome. Well, this is what Olivia said. She said, quote,

I was fresh out of college, 20 years old, dumb, dumb, drunken night. One time had a hookup with T-Rab and I wanted to take it to my grave. Who wouldn't? Oh,

I'm sorry. So it wasn't recent. No, it was about 10 years ago. Cause I think Olivia's around 30. So Taylor Ann is is like you know because olivia is very good friends with katherine and has never told katherine about this but olivia's like i hooked up with thomas before i ever met katherine i'm sorry was was 10 years ago before her kids were born like before katherine no she uh they said it was

after like they already had two kids by then. But her son isn't 10. Right. So maybe it wasn't 10 years ago. Maybe it was like six. But I thought Olivia is like 30. Anyways, it's not apples to apples because Olivia wasn't friends with Catherine, but Olivia's friends with Catherine now and has never told her. Meanwhile, last night, last night, Catherine posted on Instagram pictures with Olivia being

like, I love you. Okay. Actually, now it feels like this was brought up like like Taylor's a bad faith actor like it's not really relevant I'm sorry I thought it was like this week they they fucked or like you know like this year no it was like something embarrassing that Olivia and and she only told Taylor her friend and now Taylor told everyone it's like that is just wrong oh I'm sorry okay I'm now that I understand like the full, like I would literally never talk to this person again. If like there was somebody I hooked up with who I was so embarrassed about and like

I literally never told anyone. And I wasn't hurting anyone by not telling anyone. Like I just needed to take this to my grave forever. Like, and you then tell it on TV. Like, not only do I hate you, like I am so fucking done with you. That's actually like a whole other level of betrayal. I agree agree and I just don't know why Taylor Ann keeps doing bad things no and Jackie and honestly this doesn't serve Taylor Ann at all because it doesn't make Olivia look bad this was before she knew Catherine like Catherine has been posting with Olivia so it's all good so she really did this horrible thing Taylor she didn't really make a point she didn't really you know slay the argument she just looks like a vengeful like spiteful person and honestly not that I ever

planned on it but I will never tell this girl a secret of mine like if I meet her I'm running the other way yeah the the Taylor had said it was five years ago but I think that might be murky of when it was but definitely before Olivia ever met Catherine. Damn. That's really, like the way I internalized this story once you first said it, and now that I know everything is so different. Yeah, like Olivia again is the victim.

Yeah. And Taylor Ann, like she needs to stop. And maybe reality TV is not the best thing for her because before she met Shep and before she came into not the best thing for her because yeah before she met Shep and before she came into this world she was just like a nice girl a nice girl she's very religious and she just like she's she's not practicing what she preaches is how I feel and it's disappointing because I really like her this is like fame and like the toxicity of reality tv like really I think based on what you're saying turning someone into like the worst version of themselves yeah even though

like a part of me and I'm not even so mad about the Austin thing because a part of me feels like Taylor and Austin like are made for each other because they're really good friends and maybe they should be together and I'm not mad at them for exploring that, especially because I never felt like Olivia and Austin's relationship was that serious. But it was the lying. She was literally lying straight to everyone's face. She sounds like truly diabolical and it feels like it's one of those situations because now that I've heard you talk about like your take on Southern Charm

for like the last couple of weeks slash months, I feel like you just like her and you're like looking for ways to defend her but like she maybe it's not worth your defenses no this is kind of the last straw for me but i do need to finish watching this season not the last not like sometimes like by the way i understand this like when you really ride for someone but like sometimes you need to know like when the jig is up and i think like your jig is up yeah because this yeah i like to give chances of course course. You know, we're all human. Of course. We make mistakes.

Of course. But she literally made another mistake last night after like a couple years of making mistakes. Like you've got to at some point stop. Of course. So I need to catch up on Southern Charm after I finish The Crown. But now that I've turned my TV back on, anything's possible. You know, the world is truly your oyster.

I know. But then I was like up so late watching TV is truly your oyster I know but then I was like up so late watching TV I know I know it's like what are you 16 like whenever I'm like I need to be sleeping whenever I'm up past midnight like watching a TV show that I just can't put down um I literally feel like literally I'm in high school and I get in trouble like if my mom comes in and like the remote like I keep the remote in my hand to like turn it off in case she comes in like I I understand that feeling and it's also like we're business owners we're women we're mothers like what are we doing staying up all night watching television yeah I guess last night

I felt like I could do it because we were recording a little later today and it's audio only so I could sleep in if I needed to and it's Friday so it's very lax over here it's like it's kind of a casual Friday at the Toast. It's Sunday night. I'm up really late and I have like a full day. Like today's kind of a relaxed day for me.

So I was like, oh, I'll be getting a little crazy stay up late. Love. Yeah. You deserve it. And look, I can't stop talking about it.

So maybe it was very good for me. Right. No, it was fun. You were actually like doing the work because it's funner for the show. That's always the truth. Yeah, no.

When you're a podcaster that like podcasts about your own life, you can really kind of make any poor decision about work. Like you could say like I had to do that. Like I had to get so drunk like for the story so I could tell them on the podcast. Yeah, but that's how you get to be living like a life that you don't want to be living. No, like a life that's not yours. Yeah, like when you're just doing everything for the story. Just in general, I feel like non-podcasters do that.

People do that so that they could tell their friends something crazy. And it's like, okay, but you still have to like do something crazy. How did that make you feel? Yes, and? Yes, and. Are you ready for our next story? What number is it? Three.

Yes. Jessica Simpson is poking fun at her viral Chicken of the Sea mix-up in a new ad with her daughter, Max. So 20 years on, Jessica Simpson is poking fun at her Chicken of the Sea moment in a new ad for the tuna brand. In the clip, she's sitting on the couch with her daughter, Maxie, while eating from a packet of tuna. Her daughter says, Mom, what are you eating in the package?

She said, It's called chicken of the sea, but it's not really chicken, so don't get confused by it. Her daughter says, Who would? And Jessica's like, Yeah, who would? Not me.

No, by the way, I have so many thoughts from this. One, love the association. I can't believe these two never worked together. And by two, I mean chicken of the sea and Jessica Simpson. Until this moment,

I loved the younger generation element. Jessica Simpson until this moment I loved like the younger generation element Jessica Simpson's like a really good actress I thought that like she acted really well in the commercial I do want to say something oh and it's something that I guess one could say is in defense of Jessica Simpson's intellect why the fuck is it called chicken of the sea what would you like to say did you not hear what i said no you cut out oh sorry okay why the fuck is it called chicken of the sea like why the fuck would a tuna company have in its brand name chicken. That's like The Toast, which is a digital show, being called like The Cable.

But we're on digital. Like, it makes no fucking sense. Yeah, well, I think they were trying to, and maybe they were successful because it feels this way now. They were trying to like normalize tuna. You know? Yeah. because people eat chicken and maybe tuna gives people the willies especially like from a can or a packet but if it's oh it's the chicken okay okay but also like do people eat chicken of the sea like i know everybody loves like there's a couple like classic grocery store companies and i feel like chicken of the sea is like not one of like the big ones. I think it is. But there's the other one.

The one. Is it like starfish? Starfish. Sarkist. Yeah. But I'm not going to lie. She was eating this packet of tuna, wild caught light tuna. That's lemon garlic flavored by McCormick.

That's like what she was eating on the couch. And that sounds fire. Jackie, that's like a commercial working. And I actually think you should buy it and do a taste test on your Instagram. And Ben too. Ben is very, very, very, very, he won't eat Star Kiss. Like he doesn't think it's good enough. He does like wild caught from this company.

He like has to get it special. He's not like an ordinary tuna consumer. Okay, but when we were on vacation, he had tuna in cans from the store and he made tuna fish like every day. So he had tuna in cans. I don't believe it was Star Kiss. I think it was his special company. Oh. It's like a yellow and blue.

Let me look it up. I'll tell you exactly because I feel like people will actually want to know. Tuna can wild. Wild Planet? Is that it? Let me just look. Yes, Wild Planet. And like when you look, when you want to buy it online,

like you buy it at iHerb.com, HerbsPro.com. It's like weird. eBay. It's Ben selling his old tuna. No, it literally is. So I have to exclude Ben from this conversation is what I'm saying because he's not like your typical consumer when it comes to tuna. Got it. Well, the packet looks really good good and then in the end of the commercial she's holding a packet that looks like it was seasoned with like some Thai flavorings and

they're doing like collabs because like McCormick yeah lent its flavors to the tuna anyways all in all 10 out of 10 10 out of 10 marketing 10 out of 10 production Jessica's performance was a 10 out of 10 love her getting her daughter involved getting her in the sag you know um i love this and i really feel like if you would have asked me the day before yesterday like is chicken of the sea still in business i honestly would have said i don't know now i know yeah i know i would have said yes you knew that yeah yeah and didn't they do chicken of the Sea ads on The Apprentice? The Apprentice? Yeah, when Joan was on.

Remember, that was one of their challenges, and she made up that jingle, cluck, cluck, cluck, splat. Okay, okay. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I didn't realize you were referencing, like we were trying to see if Chicken of the Sea is still relevant, and I didn't see how you bringing up a TV show that aired 11 years ago would be helpful in this relevant conversation. Well they made it till 11 years ago so like

you know halfway there. Cool. Yeah. Do you remember that episode? I don't really. I also don't remember a lot of when we sat down to watch Joan Rivers on Celebrity Apprentice and I think I need to re-watch it again because I know she but she spoiler alert ends up winning um but there was a lot of dynamics at play you know she came on with her daughter and her daughter like stunk it up because her daughter just like couldn't jive the way though and compete the way Joan could Joan was also like a lot older than a lot of these people but I know that the Joan that we knew when she passed away like that level of fame was really

like the catalyst for that level that she reached was her winning celebrity apprentice it's like a really important part of her career so if you are like a scholar of Joan Rivers which we like to consider ourselves it's actually it's required viewing that you watch that season it is and it's so good there are so many dynamics at play like her and Annie Duke Annie Duke yeah so her and Annie Duke have this like really crazy rivalry. Annie Duke is a professional poker player, if you don't know who she is. And she's really major. But also other celebrity dynamics that are at play during that season that are really

interesting. Khloe Kardashian. She was actually kicked off because she had to miss a challenge to go to a court hearing for her DUI. And when Donald Trump found out that she was... That she had had a DUI in the past. That she was a person who drunk drove he was like you're out of here I don't vibe with that then Jesse James who now we know is like disgraced former husband of Sandra Bullock we know the Kat Von D scandal at the time he was Sandra Bullock's husband there is is a lot going on in that season. Like it's really

worth your time. It is worth your time. He was a sleeper candidate. He performed really well. I actually ended up really liking him after that. Yeah. Then there's Dennis Rodman. Of course. He was really, really, really unhinged. And like, honestly, he really bothered me. And I think my overall feelings towards him went down due to his performance on Celebrity Apprentice. He really thought he was like too good for the whole thing. Yeah. You know who bothered me? Who?

Brandi? Andrew Dice Clay. Oh, my God. Andrew Dice Clay bothered me. Yes. And you know who else bothered me? Who? Tom Green.

Oh, OK. So Tom Green Tom Green yes first of all Tom Green like came into the show and was like I'm a loser and I'm gonna give off loser energy he gave off such like woe is me energy like oh my god I completely agree like not that I really had a high opinion of Tom Green before because I'm not really familiar with him but after that season I was like oh you're a loser yeah and you know who is also on this season Claudia Jordan who then afterwards yes was on Real Housewives of Atlanta she had a very strong showing on the season I agree I liked her after that and who I loved from the season was Brandy she was the playboy bunny I forget her last name i want to say redmond but obviously it's not and i want to say glenville and it's not either but it's similar to both of those she was also a very strong participant it's such a good season it's actually a very good show that's the

only season that i watch because of joan but i kind of want to watch other seasons speaking because it's like a lot of housewives wind up like I know Kyle did it Therese yeah like they get really good they got really good people by the way speaking of hold on wait what did you just say before Claudia Jordan yes wait Brandy Redmond Glanville speaking of Brandy Redmond I ended up on a Stephanie Holman rabbit hole because she's been like going viral on TikTok she's been like going viral on TikTok. She's been like answering questions like as a former housewife, like about like production stuff,

but also like keeping, then I started like keeping up with her life. She just moved into this like insane house in Oklahoma. Oh, okay. And I just feel like while the Real Houses of Dallas didn't work out and I do feel like it wasn't amazing, but I don't think they got like a completely fair chance.

There were some perfect housewives on that show. And Stephanie Holman was one of them. Like I need her to move to a city that has a franchise. Like she should be on TV. Yeah. And her life. Cameron Westcott too. Cameron Westcott.

Both of them. Like their lives are just ripe for reality TV. Like so much money, so many houses, fabulous bags, all this stuff. And I like need that. I need that sort of energy. I agree. Like it wasn't always the best franchise but they it wasn't the worst like it was fine I feel like just housewives was going through a lull and yes Bravo needed to

make a cut and so they cut Dallas but she was saying in her stories like because so many of the questions were about cast trips she was like we had like no budget if you really think about it our first cast trip we went to me and Brandy's house in Austin our lake house at one point we went to Caracas in Carrie Brittingham's house. Like, they were always going to someone's house. Then they took that trip to Colorado in Cameron Westcott's house. Right. She was like, when we got to go to, where did they go, Ireland?

No. Netherlands. Yeah, because Carrie Dubek was. Oh, and that's when Leigh-Anne was talking about her panty liner. She said that was, like, the biggest deal for us. Like, we finally got when Leigh-Anne was talking about her panty liner. She said that was like the biggest deal for us. Like we finally got a trip that wasn't like $4. I thought they also went to Thailand though.

Later on, yes, they did. You're right, you're right, you're right. Did she mention that? But they also had piggybacked on something Travis was doing there. So maybe it really was like. She didn't mention Thailand. She mentioned that like the Netherlands was a really big deal for them. Happy for them. Yeah.

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Thank you, La. You're welcome. Our next story is some exciting fitness news. Oh my God, exciting. Can fitness news be exciting? Yes, because Jelly Roll is training for his first 5K, and it's actually a very star-studded 5K. So Jelly Roll has started training for an upcoming 5k saying i'm in the

woods walking every morning he shared an instagram post on thursday as he went for his morning walk saying that he decided to work towards the 5k after appearing on the full send podcast the podcast host kyle gassed him up jelly roll says to join forces with comics burt kreischer and tom segura who are recruiting participants for an upcoming 5k in May so Bert Kreischer and Tom Segura do the two bears one cave podcast we're always you know sitting amongst them in the comedy charts and they said on their show that's our new year's resolution let's get ready for it let's train for it they're recruiting fellow comics to do this 5k with them like Michelle Wolfe and Stavros how Michelle Wolfe Woof. Michelle Woof. And

Louis C.K. Louis C.K. gave them a tentative yes to join their 5k and then Jelly Roll is getting Zach Bryan to join this 5k so like kind of everyone's doing a 5k. Okay so here's the thing Tom Segura and Bert Kreischer. I'll do your 5k. Like I'm a comic.

I am like able to walk now without like vomiting I I think by May like how many miles is a 5k it's like one and a half it's like it's really not a lot right like a 5k no like sounds like a lot because they put it in the metric system but it's low-key like a couple feet yeah no I did a 5k once and it wasn't like I had to train or anything but I guess I was a fit person so how long is So that makes sense. 3.1 miles. OK, low key, that's like kind of a lot.

That's like 60 blocks. OK, so Bert, Tom, if you hear this message, feel free to reach out. I will do it. Is it for charity? Like, are we donating money? Or is it just like? I'm sure there is probably a charitable component. But I think it just started as like a inspirational, aspirational thing that they were doing. It's their New Year's resolution. Yeah, no, I read Tom Seger. Oh, you told me to read Tom Seger's book. I didn't finish it, but a lot of it was like about weight. I related to that

like sentiment of just like being fat. Yeah. And I know that nobody asked us like if we want to do this star studded podcast. We'll do it. It's literally like podcasters who run. Yeah. I think that we should do it. Yeah. Please yeah please reach out um but as long as like we're you know in the podcasters suite oh yeah no and like i feel okay so like obviously like all the comedy guys in the charts like they know each other they do each other's show yeah and we're just kind of these like two fat bitches like right up there with them and like they don't know us we don't know them we like never dm or anything like i feel like definitely left out of that like you know it's that's what they say it's a boys club yeah it's true but no tim dylan with tim dylan throws us about he throws us bones yeah

he's the only one that has included us in like the boys club but like the other people know each other on a personal level like not just from the. Like there really is no way for us to get in until this 5K, which seems like a meeting of the podcasters. It sounds like all the podcasters in the comedy section are meeting up and they haven't invited us. And I will not fucking stand for that. OK, so if I have to run three miles just to get some attention, I'll do it. Yeah.

And you know what I was going to say? That the only other podcaster who's like not one of those boys in the comedy charts who's like on the comedy charts with us is the dumb blonde podcast but that's jelly rolls jelly rolls wife so she'll be there too oh wait also speaking of jelly roll and when you brought him up i thought that's what you were going to be talking about today he testified before congress yesterday about fentanyl oh yeah that was important but i do think the 5k was more no right like i was like oh okay i guess we're picking this like less relevant 5k story um he spoke really beautifully and i just like love him yeah you know what but like i'll take that on the chin that i prioritize you chose the wrong story

jelly k over jelly no but it's what was headline news really because i didn't even see the thing about the 5k and i saw the fentanyl thing like everywhere. And honestly, good for him for using his platform. Like that's like an actually, like a serious fucking issue. Yeah, no, I agree. I'm making jokes, but like good for him for using his platform

and that's important work. And he said, he's like, before I speak, like I realized like me being here, like a former drug dealer is like insane for me to be testifying at congress but for so many years I was a part of the problem and now I want to be a part of the solution like I literally had chills it was so good so good it seems like he's making a lot of changes in the new year yeah oh and that's the other thing because I watched his documentary he's an addict and the

way he sort of like lives with his addiction is he's not totally sober but he doesn't really do hard drugs anymore he smokes pot and he drinks a lot but he's like I've traded a lot of my addictions for food addiction and that's how he said he got to the weight that he was at he was very very open about that um and so like a 5k is great I love that by the way now that like I'm like put it out there like I really don't want to run this 5k because I'm just thinking about how like anytime I've ever been on the treadmill like it literally takes me 30 minutes to run a mile that's fine because you can run and walk and it's going to be like a social thing so we could just like walk and chat speed walk you know there's no rush it's

just about completing it's about friendship and come on okay and the bonds we've made it's not about the destination it's about the journey think it would be good for our careers. Well, that's really, like, just to be abundantly clear, like, if we get invited to this 5K and it's for charity, like, we will donate. Like, we will do what we need to do. But I'm only doing it for self-serving reasons. Like, I just want that to happen. And to, like, to meet some of my heroes.

Yeah, of course. Like, it's about, it's high time we met Tim Dillon. Yeah. And Tom Segura. Segura. Tom Segura Segura and hopefully hopefully his wife Christina P hopefully she'll be there in her mom jeans well she's another top 10 comedic podcaster so of course she will probably be her husband's and her husband's organizing the thing also where is it like where are we committing to going I just just feel like this, I didn't see this, but I just feel like it's in Austin.

Because that's where. I love a trip to Austin. I'm so down. Yeah. And that's where kind of all the comedic podcasters live. Maybe if we move to Austin, like then we could be in this circle of comedic podcasters. I was just going to say like us not living in Austin is like bad for our careers. Agreed.

And you know who's probably going to be there too then? Let me think. Lauren Bosticick no wait though maybe no it's like so obvious joe rogan joe rogan we have to get invited to this we have to go maybe if we put it in the title of the episode oh my god oh my god oh my god no literally burt and tom colon call us that's what we're doing okay we're using our platform for good now by the way like they should have a charitable element to this so like maybe i don't know i'm sure they do i don't think you can organize a 5k with like no but i've never seen a 5k that literally don't benefit charity i've never seen a 5k that like no but I don't think they do 5ks that literally don't benefit charity I've never seen a 5k that didn't benefit a charity like then what are you doing yeah totally

cool are you ready for our fifth and final story which is some sports news some sports news yeah there was kind of some big sports news that happened so this is like bill belichick is leaving the Patriots and a new coach has been named, Jared Mayo, who's 37 and he's the youngest coach in NFL history. Now that Bill Belichick is leaving the Patriots after six Super Bowls in 65 years and just a lot of history.

Yeah. And the last time he was, the last game he was at, he like left the field with his head down because they lost like by a million points. And I think everybody knew it like was, there was rumors that it was going to be his last game. And does that mean he's retiring or he's going to another team? I think retiring because one, you know, he's of that age. And two, if he wanted to still be a coach, like why would he after 65 years go somewhere else like 65 yeah no no I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry 30 right 30 okay glad we cleared that up um and did you say this was like a two-part sports story 24 okay thank you it's becoming less and less impressive yeah it is a two-part story because they just named their

new head coach who is jared mayo and he's the youngest spell it in nf g e r o d mayo like helmans and he's the youngest coach in NFL history, and he's the first black coach in New England's 65-year history. It's Jared with a J, not G. I didn't say G. You literally said G. Okay, go back and rewind the tapes. They're so similar.

He's so cute. What's his age? If you were born in 19— 37. Oh, that's really young. That's what I'm'm saying that's why it's a two-part story and then again he's the first black coach for the patriots yeah obsessed by bill like honestly i've never been like a big like i'm not really into the coaches although i do think the coach of the eagles so cute. What is his name? Yeah. Phil?

Nick Sirianni, yes. I also love Andy Reid. Yeah, he's a cutie. And then there was that coach of the Jets whose name was Rex. And Rex Ryan. And he looks like my father-in-law and like I could not get over it. But then I found out he had a brother who was also a coach. And it was just like such a cute thing. Yeah, Rex Ryan. And he looks like my father-in-law. And like I could not get over it. But then I found out he had a brother who was also a coach. And it was just like such a cute thing.

Yeah, Rex Ryan brother. Rob Ryan. They both look like Bruce Offerjack. Like it's crazy. I'm going to go look up Rex Ryan. But then there was that other coach of the Jets. I mean, Rex Ryan was a while ago. Who was the Jets coach?

There was another one who's like a big name. He's always getting into trouble. Oh okay. The Jets coach now Robert Saleh. Hot. Hot. Bald. Bald and hot. I just have the idea

of someone in my head and I'm not going to be able to tell you who I'm thinking of. I mean like us trying to talk about football coaches I just have the idea of someone in my head. And I'm not going to be able to tell you who I'm thinking of. I mean, like us trying to talk about football coaches when we can barely keep the players like. The coaches is a whole nother. I know. A whole nother thing. But you know what?

Ain't it good to be the coach? I'm sure it is. And hopefully Gerard will be finding out soon. Love that. Bye, Bill. Yeah, bye, Bill. But like thank you for your service. Six Super Bowls, amazing tenure, great work, job well done.

Not us doing like such a banger one-hour episode on a Friday when I'm on vacation. Like I thought this was going to be like a 40-minute piece of shit. But like this is so – like we – even when we don't try, like we are so supremely talented. Yeah. We're in the right industry and it's high time that bert and tom recognize that yeah it's high time that we ascended to the meetings of the top 10 comedic podcasters so title we're thinking bert and tom colon call us or like two guys two two bears, two bears, one toast?

Like how will we get their attention? Bert and Tom call us. Okay. But like how many Berts and Toms are there? You know what I mean? They'll know. Like if they titled their episode Jackson Turd Call Us. Oh my God, I would die.

Yeah. Also, I could just see them like not giving a rip about the podcast charts and never seeing our title what's that like I don't believe that there are people who put content out who don't vigorously refresh the charts like I mean I guess like no like no sorry there's no way no and also it's irresponsible to do that because you need to know like you have a duty like if you're if people liked this guest how things are performing like you know you can't just like put things out like you're running a business you need to know what the feedback is precisely so that is our last show of the week and also our last show until tuesday monday is

martin luther king day so there will not be an episode of the toast so just keep that in mind thank you guys so much for listening to the Toast, the millennial morning show where we deliver the fastest stories you need to know every Monday through Friday on YouTube. So if you're watching this on YouTube, please feel free to subscribe and give this video a thumbs up. We're also available as a podcast anywhere podcasts can be found. So it's Spotify, iTunes, Stitcher, Public Radio, iHeartRadio, CastBox, all the places where we listen to podcasts. Find us at Toast. Leave a five-star review about

how beautiful, stunning, and wickedly talented we are. Hope you guys have an amazing day, and we'll see you on Tuesday. Bye! Love ya! Bye!