The Toast - S3 Ep166: After Dale: Wednesday, October 14th, 2020

Episode Date: October 14, 2020

2020 Billboard Music Awards Are Tonight. Here are the Nominees Kate Hudson, Gwyneth Paltrow reveal their worst on-screen kisses (Page Six) Stevie Nicks Joins TikTok First Video Is a Take on the Viral 'Dreams' Challenge (PEOPLE) James Van Der Beek Opens Up About the 'Drastic Changes' in His Life That Led Family to Move to Texas (PEOPLE) iPhone 12: What you need to know about Apple's new 5G phone lineup (CNN Business) The Bachelorette Recap Dear Toasters Advice Segment The Morning Toast with Claudia (@girlwithnojob) and Jackie Oshry (@jackieoproblems) Merch: https://shopmorningtoast.com/ The Morning Toast Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/themorningtoastSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Good morning, Millennials. Welcome back to the Morning Toast. Happy Wednesday. Happy Hump Day. Speaking of Hump Day, say hello to the King and Queen of Hump Day, Claudia and Theo. Hi, guys. Happy Wednesday. Theo wanted me to let everyone know that he's doing good. He actually got an early start on his humping, so he's taking a nap because he's, like, exhausted. I mean, you guys know, humping is actually a really physically strenuous activity. Lots of legwork. Yeah, he's all humped out for the day. So I'm glad that he's celebrating in style.

I can't wait to hump alongside him next week and to celebrate Hump Day the way it was meant to be with T-H-E-O. Yes. I'm glad he got it out of the way because to be honest, we have a very busy show today. Like yesterday was the premiere. It's one of those days.

Yesterday was the premiere of The Bachelorette. Yeah, The Bachelorette. And, my God, do I have a lot to say. So we're obviously going to be recapping it, and just, we're now in it. Like, we now, moving forward, like, we are a part of it. Like, it just, it all happened so quickly. It did and it didn't, and I'm actually, even though I thought last night's episode was like really boring. I'm just going to pretend like that didn't happen and say that I'm excited for this season because just like Potomac, you know, the end where they show what's coming up this season.

I was like getting excited. And I think at a certain point, we really don't know what happens like after Claire exits the chat Jackie we don't know what happens after Dale after Dale OG brothers will understand that reference after Dale and so for that reason I'm excited and also like there were some serious cuties last night like she got an amazing group of guys who are not only handsome who have real jobs I Jackie I totally agree I had the same exact thought I have a little crush yes I have a crush on like three of the guys and we'll get into it when we do our tv recap segment um but yeah you guys we're here and let's just be positive you know the bachelor it's like it's so crazy it just to me it feels like

such a burden to be a fan of the show. One, because I feel like we're constantly being let down. And two, because the physical, no, not the physical, the literal time it takes to be a fan and just, like, be someone who's watching and knowledgeable about the season, it's exhausting. Yeah, but I feel like if you're someone who can not listen to what's going on in the media, you actually have a more enjoyable time watching the show. But like for us, because we already know what's happening, we are bored by it. But I agree. I mean, you know what, because it's just been such a crazy eight months, I'm actually excited for the Bachelor like content to overtake my life. Yeah, like that's a place where I'm happy for my

life to be and speaking of life updates last night I finished A Place to Call Home wow it last episode of season six it is done I obviously these characters will stay with me forever sister Adam sister Nordman sister Bly um but I just you know what it's not every day that a show comes along that changes your life and when that show does come you must shout it from the rooftops and you must share it with others you must you must and if anybody is watching because I told them to I just have like one thing that I want to say, like I wish I had people to talk about it with, but I just want to say like Doris Collins is an icon and she's my everything. And she literally made the show a comedy. And that's all I'm going to say. I look forward to everyone else watching it because you know that I now am recommending it to all of the toasters, including Claudia.

Well, my dance card may be free in a few days. I have very few episodes left of Mad Men, and now I find myself slowing down. I just don't want to be at the end. I think I have like three episodes left. I've now gotten to the part where McCann Erickson dissolves them, and they all work for the big agency, and it's just nothing of the sort. Nobody is respecting Joan. Nobody's respecting Peggy.

She doesn't even have an office yet. Um, Don is one of like 15 creative directors and he's just not into that type of environment. He likes a more of a boutique agency vibe. And I don't like this. I don't like all the change. It's very upsetting. Um, and I only have a few episodes left and I'm really savoring them. Like you could tell they're tying up a lot of loose ends. Like very, very sadly, Burt Cooper passed away and that was really devastating. And Glenn finally met Betty 18 years later and he's like a fucking freak.

That was like the only storyline I don't really understand. Like why the neighborhood kid from Helen Bishop's daughter, like that kid who like Betty babysat once and he was a freak he stayed in touch with bet with Sally after they moved and Betty never knew and then when he turned 18 he came to the house to say bye because he was joining the army and they had like a tearful goodbye and he like tried to kiss her and it was just like so weird he's like a child yeah yeah that was an extremely weird storyline. apartment because he had a TV in his office and he ended up becoming like an actual important guy in the agency. And next thing you know, he's literally trying to get Don's ex-wife Megan to go up to a hotel room with him just so she can get a new TV agent. Like he literally became Harvey Weinstein. To me, that was the craziest thing, but that's literally how it happens. You give a

fucking loser, an insecure loser, like an ounce of power and that's how they become these monsters. It's exactly how it happens. No, but also the way that he got that ounce of power, that's how they become these monsters it's exactly how it happens no but also the way that he got that ounce of power it's like because he's the only person who i don't want to say sound like claire crawley because i find this statement to be so problematic showed up yeah no he's literally the only person who showed up like what was it like now it's like in the show it's like 10 years ago at sterling cooper the original one he was like oh we should have media department and so roger's like sure welcome to our new head of media and then like when the client started to call asking for a media department they sent them to him yeah but that's just it's really it was kind of brilliant like that is how powerful people like become monsters they're they're nobodies they're

insecure losers like harry crane was a fucking loser and now he's like so problematic it was really interesting um so yeah i'm really really, really, really enjoying it. And I'm really sad that it's over. And I know what's to come. And I just, I don't want to do it. Maybe by the time we see you tomorrow, it will be alvidezin. I don't know. Like I'm trying to fill my days so I don't just like finish Mad Men.

But I know I have to finish it. Like I know I do. It's just, I'm not ready to say goodbye. I know. I became ready to say goodbye to. Like, I know I do. It's just, I'm not ready to say goodbye. I know. I was, I became ready to say goodbye to the wonderful people of Inverness because I had to move on with my life. And now I have all these other things ahead of me. Mariah Carey's memoir, Here I Come.

I just, I don't even know where to start. So. By the way. I guess we could start. Wait, before you do that. I watched Rock Shop and Slive last night with Hoda Kotb and Lenny kravitz lenny kravitz was promoting his new memoir i actually think you should read it it sounded really good oh okay yeah it was like on he went on there to promote his book and i got sold you got promoted okay and you got sold to sell it to me yeah no

for you but no it's a type of book i would read too um i just like obviously i know lenny kravitz but he was amazing on Watch What Happens Live like I don't know some of the stuff they do on Watch What Happens Live like if you're if you don't get Bravo or you don't get Andy it could seem like a little stupid but um Lenny was just like down he was playing all the games he was getting involved he was just like being a good sport about all of it it made me really really like him yeah you know I'm down because he is Jason Momoa's stepdaughter's dad and you want to hear the cutest thing and he's a Jew yes and he was like who was your first celebrity crush and he thought about

it for a second and then he said Lisa Bonnet I know and you know what the other week there was a story it probably was coming out like injunction with his memoir about how the first time he saw Lisa Bonnet he was like I'm gonna marry. And it's kind of similar to the way Jason Momoa has spoken about her. So there's just something about Lisa Bonet that makes you want to say, mama. Sorry, I didn't realize I totally butchered her name, Lisa Benet, Lisa Bonet, Benet.

It's okay. Okay, now I think if you wanted to do what you were going to do, I would be okay with that. Ooh, but I don't know if I'm ready again, because it comes and goes, you know? You're telling me? I know I'm the only person in the world who understands what you're going through. Oh, and you know who else understands. Thea. You know who else understands. Today's sponsor, so get to it.

Okay, fine, only because I'm so excited for the sponsor. Me too. It is time for the Fast Five stories that you need to know before you wake up and take a bite out of your morning toast. And I absolutely love today's sponsor, mostly because migraines are a huge side effect of RDH. I've actually, you and I both get migraines. I've been getting them since college. It is the fucking worst thing ever. And honestly, until we discovered Cove, it was nothing of the sort.

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from migraines so head over to withcove.com yeah okay first slash toast slash toast sign on slash toast yeah first story tonight is the billboard music awards hosted by kelly clarkson for the third year in a row because she's iconic i'm so glad she has everybody loves her i'm so glad she has this job i know i mean this job really like loves her. I'm so glad she has this job. I know. I mean, this job really, like, opened the doors. Yes. To so many other jobs. Like, Billboard's an open door. No, you're right.

Yeah, and it showed that, like, she's everything of the sort. And people fell in love with her. And that brought her a talk show. And so now she's back to the place where people first saw her in a new light. Tonight, we will have the Billboard Music Awards after they were postponed. We have all of the nominees if we want to play our favorite game of who we would vote for. Yes, I mean, I love the Billboard Music Awards. I feel like it's always like a fun night.

I feel like they include all the genres, and it's like a great night for country. It's a great night for pop. It's a great night for everyone, and I'm very much looking forward to seeing Luke Holmes. Yeah. I hope there are some great performances. I heard BTS is performing Dynamite, which has become literally my favorite song. Jackie, the song deserves an Oscar. It is absolute. We were in the car last weekend singing to it and we don't know any of the words and we're like, Nana suit a dinner with the little potato light it up like dynamite whoa and samsung uses that song in their commercial for their new phone and i swear i'm it's so persuasive i'm about five seconds away from getting an android i'm about five seconds away from lighting it up like dynamite that's the

thing and i'm always driving through the city with that little funky soul. I think that's what it is, but it's, it's such a fucking amazing song. And you know, a while back we did clash with the BTS army. I don't know if you guys remember, but Jackie and I,

we reported, they gave us a, they gave us a talking to. Yeah. Jackie and I reported on a story that basically said like BTS and K-pop fans were really upset with the Grammy nominations because they didn't get a Grammy. And my stance back then was that just because you're popular doesn't mean your music is Grammy worthy. And that was what I thought. You know, I thought their music was very like breaking barriers in terms of its popularity,

but I didn't think that it was the quality of, you know, Grammy deserving. And now I stand here today with my foot in my mouth because... No, it's not necessarily your foot in your mouth, but BTS pretty much brought everything that you were asking them to bring. Like you said, make a Grammy worthy song. And they did. And they did. Yeah. But when we had those opinions, you guys, BTS ARMY descended upon us, especially on

Twitter. It was honestly like I feared for my life it was so fucking crazy but now hopefully um this clip will get sent out into the bts universe of us singing their praises and we'll be accepted by bts army once again yes and we'll no longer be the irrelevant uglies that they called us yes that's what that's all that's what they called us and we were dying and we were so it was honestly such a creative way for someone to like. It was a great, it was a great insult. It was iconic.

Irrelevant uglies. And you know what? Cut us off at the knees. Like both things that could be so hurtful to us. Irrelevant uglies. I loved it so much. We almost made merch out of it. It was so funny.

But now I'm on the BTS train. Like I'm on the ship. Where are we going? Take me. Light it up like dynamite. Light it up like dynamite. Okay. So here are some of the top categories for tonight's big show. So let's say if we were on the BB, actually it's fan voted. So if you were voting as a fan, who would you vote for? Top artist, Billie Eilish, Jonas Brothers, Khalid, Post Malone, Taylor Swift.

It's just so hard because I can't really encapsulate what a year was like who, I mean, folklore was so big, but it's like, there was also 10 months before that. Um, and Billie Eilish was really big. I don't know.

You know what? I would either go post Malone or Taylor Swift here. And I think because Taylor Swift had his lover in this cycle and folklore, I think is Taylor Swift going tonight? What, what are the chat rooms saying? Are people going to the BBMAs or is it remote? Oh, I think, is Taylor Swift going tonight? What are the chat rooms saying? Are people going to the BBMAs or is it remote? Oh, I mean, it's like a virtual show. It remains to be seen how it will be done, but I imagine that some people will go and accept awards,

kind of like the VMAs. I don't think it would become more virtual than that. I don't think Taylor will go. Oh, if she doesn't go, then she's not winning. You know, I just, I mean, I haven't heard anything in my chat rooms, but I don't think she would go. I don't think she, um, wants to like be stepping out. I think she wants to probably like set a good example about staying home. That's what my, my thought is. Okay. But she also, she went to the CWA's or whatever.

Oh, the CWA. It brings me back to a place to call home. Oh, I'm like like what the fuck is the cwa no she went to the acms i thought yes that's you know yeah yeah what i meant um that's true she did but she did pre-record something i don't think she went i think she went but whatever top billboard album billy eilish when we fall fall asleep where do we go ariana grande thank you next khalid free spirit post malone hollywood's bleeding taylor swift lover oh so i guess Ariana Grande, Thank U, Next, Khalid, Free Spirit, Post Malone, Hollywood's Bleeding, Taylor Swift, Lover. Oh, so I guess they're not including like the folklore era here because literally Thank U, Next was so long ago. I can't believe we're still giving out awards for it. I

know. But I'd probably give it to Post Malone. I feel like these nominations came out months ago before the show was like postponed. And I think there's a chance that we've already done this. Yeah, no, okay. Because I'm like, none of this music has come out recently and it was all really popular like a year ago but you're right this award show was definitely postponed and i don't think we need to go through the nominees but okay but just one one more category because i'm just curious because these are all good songs for top song lewis capaldi someone you loved which just like is a song that i something i love agreed billy eilish bad guy lil nas billy ray cyrus old town oh we're still on that song lizzo truth hurts sean mendez and

camila cabello senorita lizzo i think any one of these could win except senorita for me i think anyone could win besides also lewis capaldi because even though I do love him so much, I don't think it's the top song. No, you don't understand. Like, Lewis Capaldi is out here, like, subtly changing my life. I'm obsessed with his album, even though it came out a while ago. Like, I continue to listen to it and have, like, new favorite songs, Hollywood, Grace, and now, like, Grace reminds me of Love Island. And I just feel like if anyone out there, and I don't think you are, but if anyone out there is sleeping on Lewis Capaldi, wake up.

Okay, I take it back. But I do think that Lizzo deserves to win and will probably win. Okay. I mean, I do think it's about who shows up. And I can't believe that we're still talking about Old Town Room. No, I know. It's like we're living in like... Are you sure you're not reading an article from last year?

I'm reading an article from this morning on E! Yeah, no, this is definitely a COVID delay situation because this is making no sense. But I will actually be watching the Billboard Music Awards. Now that music awards and just award shows in general are so far and few between and before we were so inundated with them, I've come to appreciate most of them. And the Billboard Music Awards is definitely one that I appreciate and will like be making a viewing experience out of. I'm really hard on award shows, but there are some that for, I don't know what, like what reason I love and I will always watch and Billboard is one of them. And so I'm, I'm excited to watch tonight.

I think something about Billboard that we respect is like they have like integrity because their entire platform is the music charts, which is really just whoever's the most popular is at the top. It's not like you can buy your way in or like you're the most famous person. So you get to go up. So they have a little bit of integrity. And Kelly Clarkson. Oh, Kelly Clarkson. OK okay are you ready for our next story i am kate hudson and gwyneth paltrow are revealing their worst on-screen kiss on the goop podcast oh interesting yeah so it's not who you would expect uh kate hudson says i feel like i

haven't i kind of haven't had the best kissers i feel like i should have had better ones the thing is every time i kiss matthew mcconaughey it's like there's something there's just something happening and there's like snot or wind when we were kissing in the end of fool's gold we're like in the ocean we had the plane crash he just had snot all over his face yeah that's pretty nasty and then Gwyneth said that she had an icky feeling when she kissed Robert Downey Jr. in Iron Man and Avengers. She said, quote, when I kissed him and I was like, you've got to be kidding me. This is literally like kissing my brother. Yeah. Okay. I actually feel that. I feel like the people in the Marvel or whichever it is universe are going

to be really upset to hear that. But actually, those are both really, really good examples with substantial reasoning. It's not like, you were a bad kisser, because it's actually a hard question. And that's so mean to say. Yes. Andy asks that question all the time on Watch What Happens Live. And people get so shy because it's really fucking rude. Then you make the other person feel so self-conscious. So I actually like that both of these women gave answers to really, really famous people,

but also reasons, like, excuses. And, like, didn't disrespect them, but explained how it was a not ideal situation. Yeah, honestly, these are two classy ladies. Yeah, I mean, I actually always forget that Matthew McConaughey and Kate Hudson were in multiple rom-coms together, because when you think of them two together, you think of the most iconic, How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days, like literally the best movie ever, that Keith Urban song playing when they're literally driving to Staten Island. And it's just like, does life get any better than that moment?

No. On a motorcycle, nonetheless. No, it doesn't get any better. But then it's like, oh yeah, they were also in that terrible movie about like hunting treasure or something. Which, it's just, it's crazy that two people can make the same movie like those two different movies you know okay i'm so glad that you bring up this point because there's something that might like for the last 10 years that has been bothering me oh please let it out cameron diaz and jason siegel made bad teacher which is one of the best rom-coms

movies you know how i feel about the movie and you know how I feel about the fact that you still haven't watched it. Like so disrespectful to your sister. Then they made sex tape together. Oh yeah. With the iPad. And like, how can two of the same people make two completely different quality of movies? I don't, I don't understand it. No, it's so interesting. At the end of the day, so much goes into movie making, like production, editing production editing writing that you can only put it on the two main characters so much but you're right it's crazy that like the chemistry they had in one movie just doesn't carry into another yeah and I need to know like maybe I don't know who I could ask but like what was the thing that made one movie so different from the other like was it the writer was it the director was it the script like because I feel like I love the two of them.

I should love sex tape. And it's not like the worst plot ever. It's stupid, but whatever. And it's seriously the worst movie ever. I'll never watch it more than the one time that I did. Yes, me as well. Also, can we just take a brief moment to appreciate the life and work of Jason Segel?

I adore him. And I just wonder why he doesn't like leave his house more. You know, I don't know. Why don't you leave your house more? Wow. Okay. I see what you did there. No, I just mean, like, he's not really, like, a celebrity.

Like, he doesn't go to events. He's not out and about dating. Like, he doesn't even do movies that much anymore. I think, obviously, he's very wealthy and he doesn't need to, but it's like, what about the Jason Stans? Like, what about us? He's in it for the craft, I think. He's a crafty one. obviously he's very wealthy and he doesn't need to, but it's like, what about the Jason Stans? Like, what about us? He's in it for the craft, I think. He's a crafty one.

Yeah, I mean, he was also on How I Met Your Mother, which was a huge show. So he's definitely like rolling in the dough. Oh, I didn't even think about that one. Yeah, and also like Forgetting Sarah Marshall was literally like one of the biggest, probably the biggest movie ever. Like, it's honestly, I would, I like it obviously, but I would consider like it obviously but

I would consider it like one of the top five most popular rom-coms yeah I mean it's so good I'm looking him up now I miss him so much like he for so long was like my dream man yeah and now I've just forgotten about him you know he's just so tall and handsome like I've never met him but I can imagine he has this you know overwhelming presence for sure maybe that's why he doesn't like step out and go to these events because they kill overwhelm yeah and he's very conscious of his overwhelming nature yeah he's a considerate guy yeah he's in Forgetting Sarah Marshall he's in um How I Met Your Mother here Freaks and Geeks I Love You Man knocked up and Geeks did you ever watch that show this is 40 i tried to but didn't but like i didn't get into it oh my god it's an unbelievable show it's only

like one or two seasons it was like this show made in the 80s um it kind of reminds me of the goldbergs because it's like so 80s but this was like actually taking place in the 80s and it was like the first job for like jason siegel james franco busy phillips linda cartellini who by the way is now in mad men and she is my least favorite character sylvia like oh yeah she's bad news bears what's gone up to these days just being toxic um single he divorced megan again and he like found this waitress in a diner and like thought she was beautiful and followed her to wisconsin like i can't this is where he's getting insane I was wondering when you were gonna get to that part which I never even fully understood and it it tanks the show oh and the waitress is played by none other than Esme from Twilight the mom oh my god yeah okay that makes

it better but still yeah but really quickly back to freaks and geeks if anyone is looking for like a true time capsule a content upper watch it it's one season of a series and it's pure gold and it happened to have been like the first project like so many famous people worked on like you will die like all the people just coming out of the woodwork like famous famous famous famous famous famous famous famous yeah and it was judd aptow no oh yeah yeah and he got that whole crew together and now like that and then that crew was just like shucking and moving and grooving and it was good it's really good okay are you ready for our next story because it's like you know a full circle moment from something we reported on last week i love a full full circle moment. Don't you just love? Stevie Nicks joins TikTok, and her first video is a take on the Viral Dreams Challenge.

The legendary singer-songwriter sings the iconic 1977 Fleetwood Mac song in her first ever TikTok video. She says, afternoon vibe, lace them up, while she's drinking ocean spray cranberry juice. I actually was scrolling tiktok right before we started recording and I saw it and I was like oh good for her yeah good for her good for 420 dog face 208 and like for the ocean spray family now Fleetwood Mac and ocean spray are forever intertwined like and I I'm glad that we can close the book on this like I'm kind of done talking

about it but like I do love a story like this me too do you think Stevie Nicks's was like branded because it kind of was giving me ad vibes like the logo of the bottle was just so perfectly placed in the first frame and her caption had hashtag cranberry dreams like I don't know I it was curious you know what I didn't think about it but yes a hundred percent because one to make her join tiktok like i think they paid her to join the platform and to post this video i so that like you know people would be reporting on it again like look at us we fell right into the trap yep and like to put you know the end to close the loop on this yeah i think she got paid mad money well i think the FTC is going to be all over this because there was no disclosure, no hashtag ad, no hashtag sponsor. And that is what we call illegal.

Interesting. Well, got to make that money. Any way you can, Stevie. Any way you can. Okay, our next story is a little james vanderbeek news because james vanderbeek is opening up about the drastic changes in his life that led him to move his family to texas wow something's reported on it but like a few months ago he posted a picture of his empty home and was like we're out of here and now he's talking about what happened that led to his

decision to relocate his family, his wife and their five children. I actually thought there were certain interesting nuggets in here. That is interesting for any like celebrity to move out of Hollywood and not like to New York or Nashville, Texas. That's like Joe Rogan moving his entire operation to Texas. He said in the last 10 months, we've had two late term pregnancy losses, each of which put Kimberly in the hospital. We spent Christmas break thinking she had a tumor. The doctor was wrong, thank God. A business colleague I hired hijacked the project and stabbed me in the back.

I was prematurely booted off a reality dancing show I was favored to win in front of the whole world. And my mom died. And the shutdown. All of that led to some drastic changes in our lives and our dreams and priorities and landed us here. He's overflowing with profound gratitude today. And he posted some photos of his family living the life in Texas. Farm Chum and vibes, I would say. So do you feel like this is not only like a departure from L.A., but like a resignation from Hollywood?

Maybe, but like he could be resigned for like the next year two years and then by the time he decides he wants to get back to work like things will just be picking up anyway so it's really the perfect time for him to go on hiatus I mean obviously everything that's happened to their family they've been through so much in the last um year and that can compel one to move but like the celebrity gossip in me is questioning this line about prematurely booted off a reality show i was um favored to win in front of the whole world because we remember that night that he was eliminated from dancing with the stars and i feel like everyone kind of thought that like he had wanted to go and like kind of asked to be

eliminated because it made no sense that he was especially considering that was the same week that his wife had miscarried right and i think that's why it was it was portrayed to us whereas like he had this very terrible week the week before like his pregnant wife was like in the ballroom and showing off her belly and it was so beautiful and then the next week she's in the hospital and like he has to dance and whatever and i think he did end up dancing that week but it was really made out to seem like he did his last dance but like he has got bigger priorities at home and we totally understood he really was a front runner I don't think he was ever going to beat Hannah Brown but just in terms of like fans and like voting wise but it does seem strange to me that in this, you know, what was it, an Instagram caption or an interview?

Yeah, Instagram caption. That he would put, you know, what his wife went through in the same thing as getting kicked off of a reality show, you know? Yeah, no, I agree with that, which makes me think that, like, him getting kicked off was really, and we've said this before, that, like, Dancing with the Stars, like, actually really fucks with people. Like, the elimination process like people find it really difficult and when they do get them eliminated like it's really hard on them and so I'm just saying I think at the time we kind of thought that he wanted to be eliminated and maybe even asked for that but now it seems like he was ready to keep on going and he got

eliminated like prematurely one and during one of the hardest weeks of his life and now I'm just questioning it yeah I mean I can't imagine if it wasn't his decision why you know ABC and production wouldn't want him on the show he was the most famous yeah most recognizable by name and also a really good dancer oh yeah and excellent very skilled very skilled in the ballroom wow crazy you know the pandemic is really making people reevaluate their lives and their priorities and what's important, and I commend James Van Der Beek for, you know, being introspective enough to see that Hollywood may be

toxic for him. I agree, and I am, you know, envious of the farm chairman vibes he's now cultivating with his family. Huge. Okay, are you ready for our fifth and final story? It's a little tech news. Ooh, beep-bop- announced the t for the iphone 12 they've announced four new iphones the iphone 12 the iphone 12 Pro, the iPhone 12 Max Pro, Pro Max, and a new smaller,

smaller, the iPhone 12 Mini. All the phones are 5G equipped and they have some sweet features and coming in some sweet colors. And are you going to get a new phone? I don't know. It's like, usually the Apple announcements are exciting, but I feel as though they're getting closer and closer together. And it's really exhausting to like, it's physically exhausting and fucking financially exhausting to keep up with all these new phones. It's like, I have the iPhone 11 Pro Max. That is like the most recent phone. And I just know in a matter of months, it's going to stop working because they want me to get the next one. And it's like, it's so exhausting. Like, why can't we just like have a phone for a few years? Like, why? Like, stop moving so fast. Yeah, I I know I'm really curious about this iPhone mini

like I feel like that's so cute but even though like now the trend is towards like bigger badder better screens so we can like literally stare at our screens all day like I'm I want to like go see what this iPhone mini is all about it gives me like mini gives me the 2006 I was just like which is a place technologically that we have to get back to because I've been thinking about it more and more. And when I was watching a place to call home and they have telephones and they have cars and they have trains. And so, you know,

there's a lot of tech, like same with mad men. Like there's a lot of technology, like enough to get them through, but not enough to destroy them and ruin their lives and take over their lives. And I'm trying to think of like what the perfect amount of technology has been throughout history.

And I really do think it's like when people first got cell phones you're like you're reachable at any time if there's an emergency if someone like has information that they need to tell you like before you like go on a date with a bad guy or something but it's not like you're just going to be staring at it all day right so like in Mad Men I think about it all the time because it's really they have the telegram and they have phones and they're on the phone 24 7 but it's's like landlines. So if you're out, you're in a car, you're on your way somewhere, you're driving, like no one can find you. And that's not ideal. And there were so many things that like got messed up because they couldn't reach someone in time because they weren't by their phone. They weren't in their office or they weren't at home. And it's a gift

to either be in your office or a house for people to be able to reach you. So I agree that there is, and the perfect technological place is not what we're in right now. Like it is too overwhelming. It is too toxic. It is too social dilemma. Like it's not, there is a perfect medium. And I agree. Like the invention of the cell phone was fabulous because now it was mobile. Like now it was like portable. You could be anywhere and be reachable, but it's gotten to a place that's so toxic. So when did you get your first cell phone? I think I was in like the fourth grade. I was in fifth grade when I got my first phone. Yeah. So that's early 2000s. Yeah. Early 2000s. So I would just say like a phone, you know, like a Verizon chocolate sort

of phone, a flip phone sidekick, but that does, you know, what we needed to do and also has, um, the podcast store. Oh, of course. Yeah of course yeah just like a razor flip phone with a little podcast app yeah so that people can consume their favorite podcast like the morning toast which is the millennial morning show it is and they're delivering the fast size stories every day and they are the stories that you need to know and then also they do talk about like themselves and what's going on in their lives and just like how they feel about the world around the dismay of the audience and i feel like just just, I don't know, I just can relate to them. Yeah, I feel that. And then there's also Theo, who I, who's my favorite host of The Toast, and he just brings

joy to my every day. So I would say listen, well you're listening now, but continue to listen if this happens to be your first episode. Okay. There's a lot to look forward to. And we still have a lot to do because it's Wednesday, which we forgot to mention, is our Dear Toasters day. And then we also are going to recap The Bachelorette. Which one do you want to do first, Jax?

Bachelorette. Okay. Well, Claire's season was a go last night. She had, I don't know if it was like just been a while since we watched The Bachelorette, but were there so many guys? Like, at the rose ceremony, ceremony i'm like this is the most

packed room i've ever seen yeah i mean it's always like that it's always like every year they add like one more contestant so they could say the most contestants we've ever had so i don't know how many exactly there were but like i don't remember i remember two people's names dale and blake moyan oh who i love i remember two people's names dale and easy who i love when he made the joke about everyone bringing snacks and it wasn't a cocktail party it was a potluck i thought that was so funny and like what a creative joke and i was like this guy i love him and i've actually been seeing like a lot of DMs and things from the Toasters group of people who know him. And they say he's like the best, most fun, hilarious guy. And I feel like, I don't think he makes it super far with Claire because he doesn't seem to be Dale. But I think that he could have real potential for Bachelor candidacy. He's very handsome and he's very successful. He

was a pro football player. Now he's a sports agent. I'm just, I'm putting it out there. I think he's very handsome and he's very successful he was a pro football player now he's a sports agent I I'm just I'm putting it out there I think he's the one oh I feel that also knowing that Matt James is The Bachelor next season so these men aren't here to audition for The Bachelor about that yeah it makes it more enjoyable to watch because like still I'm sure they'll be on their best behavior and they'll want to be favored in the nation and bachelor nation and go to paradise etc but it takes that out of the equation because that's the bigger prize than than Claire unfortunately is becoming the bachelor yeah so I actually like watching it knowing that none of these men are going to be the next bachelor I agree with you easy had great energy she really had such great guys. There were so many guys. I don't remember anyone's name.

But I was like, whoa. That's a real guy. I agree. Handsome, older, accomplished. We had engineers, computer software. We had really accomplished guys, which is very new. We're used to having professional swimmers and sorry, former professional

swimmers and social media managers. We had a really good group of guys I feel like she was probably really pleased with it but I want to talk about Claire really quickly because I haven't really had an opinion on Claire um before or after I like how in their recap they were you know talking about her moment in Bachelor in Paradise with Zach Coulter who's now like an Instagram thirst monster. It's so funny. I love that they showed him on the screen like because you know

he tries to like run so far from the Bachelor world. You may not know but there is a there is what's the girl's name? Helen Owen.

Everyone knows Helen Owen. Yes, Helen Owen. She's like a big influencer of Revolve like all that stuff. Her boyfriend is like a much smaller influencer. He like supports her

like takes the pictures like they're like a duo like it's cute. And they're really like they're so cute they've been together for years their goals they would say right and as probably very few people remember zach her boyfriend was on the bachelor and was on bachelor in paradise and almost went home with claire crawley and like i'm sure when he found out that claire crawley was a bachelor he was just like vomiting because he pretends he wasn't on the bachelor like he he wants nothing to do with the franchise he's totally disassociated and when they put that screen up they did totally ignore the fact that she got engaged on winter games i know and i think

that that was to their detriment because obviously we all know that she's been on it five times and to leave out the part like to leave out the part where that was her most impactful relationship and I think it's because they didn't want it to seem like oh she'll just get engaged and she thinks she knows who her husband is but she doesn't know who her husband is and so I understand what they were trying to do but like we're not stupid yeah and now it looks like you think we're stupid and that she might have like said something that would make us like not believe in her as a bachelor like listen I'm sure she got engaged to Benoit like thinking that he was like the man for her and and those things can be wrong and also people you don't see a hundred percent of someone on a show like this all of the time

we're not gonna falter for it but don't act like we forgot yeah and it's like all the examples they're using from her bachelor nation experience were literally 10 years ago like are we really supposed to believe she's still hurt about Juan Pablo? No. So it's like, Benoit is the most recent love, and she did get engaged. Like, they would actually behoove them to lean on that more, but I guess not.

But what I was going to say about Claire is that I don't really feel like I formed, like, a full opinion on her until last night, and I actually really, really like her. I think there's a lot of benefits to having an older, more mature bachelorette. And the first is that she's just very eloquent and very well-spoken. And I feel like my biggest frustration, and it's so hypocritical because I talk like that.

It's just like I'm a byproduct of my generation. But one of my biggest gripes with the show is like nobody speaks. It's like there's no sentences. It's like, like, like like you like like yeah I have a wall up yeah break it down like it's just like so yeah it's not English I'm like what am I watching there's no substance in the conversations and when she sat down with Chris Harrison and was talking about you know her mom having dementia and her dad leaving her that tape there was just like so much emotion there and she was using big words and I'm like this is English and this is it and I actually really appreciated that yes I would agree with that and as she said throughout the

episode like she will know her husband when she meets him and even though I think some people would challenge that statement I think I know what she means in that like she knows exactly what she's looking for because at 39 years old, she knows exactly who she is. And so I do think with that age comes a maturity and a real set of eyes that can see a person for who they are and what she's looking for versus like, oh, who, you know, who am I going to look best leaving here with? I completely agree.

There's like a real level-headedness that comes with age and maturity. And I think that's a huge benefit to having Claire. Yes. Now for just like the thing that she kept saying that bothered me, I guess like her motto for this season is just show up, which I find to be extremely depressing.

And she has now shown up though five times to The Bachelor. And so I think there is, there is like, she has proven that there's actually more to it than just showing up. Because you could keep showing up and nothing great is going to happen. And so when she's like to these guys, thank you for showing up. Like, I just think, I understand what she's trying to say. Like, because I think sometimes in life half the battle is showing up. I just think it's, like, wrongly applied to this situation yeah because in dating like are is that really the how low we're gonna set the bar for men like all you have to do is

show up you know like I'm telling you it really just was making me depressed for the state of like the dating world if that is the bar just show up and you know don't try to be your best self or push yourself out of your comfort zone just show up and it'll happen I actually liked that I felt like everyone was really probably more excited than usual to be there just given the fact that everyone had probably been quarantined at home for a few months and then two weeks in the hotel like there is like this collective excitement just about like getting out of the house and I feel like it definitely puts like endorphins in the air. Do you know what I mean?

It's just like there's this buzz. Yeah, I felt the same and it made me excited to watch it. Now, I just want to say in terms of the editing, and I know that The Bachelor drags everything out, but the fact that they spent, I don't know, 40 minutes about COVID testing and all of the precautions, like really bothered me because it was just like obviously not enjoyable to watch it's extremely stressful

I just came off of watching Love Island where they did the same thing they did like a bubble for the show and the contestants so everyone could kiss and be free and they literally kicked off the show they mentioned it once they said you know everyone has been COVID tested and this is like a safe COVID space and then we launched right into it and I think that was the best like I loved how they did that and so to conversely do it like this and have everyone filming themselves and like the stress of the testing it's like we've been living this for eight months we all have been we know exactly what you guys are going to do and we and we know that you're going to be safe about it please move on yeah we trust and believe in the process Like you did what you have to do. It's like, they just had to show there was so

much quarantine footage, so much testing footage. And it was like cute at first, but it really went on for so long. And it was like, we're living in an age where like, if you're not following the guidelines, you're going to get canceled. And it really felt like ABC just wanted to prove to the world, like, this is what we did. Don't cancel us. Like we are doing it right. And it was exhausting. And you know what? We're living in COVID days days like we don't need to watch it it's really depressing yeah so that was like annoying to kick it off with but eventually they got to the point and everyone is able to live in the bubble and it's very exciting so yes there is an excited energy that because also like even though you know she says thank you

for you know coming here and quarantining for two weeks even if they just stayed one night like for these guys it's exciting too to leave the house and be able to kiss a girl 100 so I think everyone is happy to be there they're happy to be there with her I think she um I didn't have a huge opinion on her either but I think she definitely was net positive for me last night. I think she's extremely strong. They showed footage of, I guess one of the guys called her like the oldest bachelorette ever. I don't know who it was. And when she was like, I'm the oldest bachelorette ever because I haven't settled for guys like you.

I was like, that's actually an amazing comeback. It's an amazing comeback. I totally agree. I cannot wait to see who says that and like what the context is. Not that much happened last night besides the first rose ceremony. Dale obviously got the first impression rose and it's very obvious that some way through this process Claire decides that like she's

wasting her time. She's wasting the guy's times and Dale is the man for her and like where do we go from here? Some people think Tayshia shows up. Some people think Hannah Ann shows up. We'll see what happens. But the little drama that did happen last night was so stupid between like fake Tyler C and Yosef about like the girls in the DMs I hate when drama consists of things that like we don't know about we haven't seen and we can't really attest to because it's like shut up like this doesn't involve us yeah also like if you are gonna come

in and start stuff with someone and you're smoking gun is that he was DMing girls on Instagram. And like, that's just not enough of a thing to bring up. And you know what? Like what he said, like if it's true that like Yosef said mass videos to girls saying good morning, beautiful. I hope you have a great day. Like that is the like one of the worst crimes a person could commit on social media. I'm not going to lie. like one of the worst crimes a person could commit on social media i'm not gonna lie but like it makes tyler c look bad because even though we know that that is so cringy like so he you sound so

crazy you're because he's you're saying that he said that he told a girl to have a good day like right right and i like i agree those types of guys who are just like so shady and like dming girls like they're disgusting. But Tyler C. being a fucking snitch on the first night, I was like, you're a bigger loser than Yosef. It was loser on loser crime to the nth degree. And I think Claire even recognized that because she started to reconcile between them. And she was listening to this dumb conversation going on in front of her. And she just got up and left because that's exactly what I do.

What a waste of time. Neither one of these guys are like the guys for her it's so irrelevant they're both stupid and I could not care less yeah I mean like neither one of those guys were Dale so she wasn't going to stick around for the conversation it is really hard to like watch the guys working over time to like woo her knowing that her heart is set on Dale and I feel like even if she hadn't said the things that she said last night like we all would watch it knowing that like she showed up for one person. And the fact that she even said to Chris Harrison, like I met my husband, et cetera, it's him. Like that's so awkward to then watch the rest of the episode for us. Like, well, these guys are trying so hard.

It's very possible that there have been other contestants who maybe said something similar to that or felt that way but it's all edited out so it's like we're we're as the audience until the very last moment supposed to be like who's it gonna be we don't know who it's gonna be like they really take out everything that would make us think that there's one front runner this whole time but given how it comes to an end we we think, you know, she basically just leaves with Dale. I don't think they can ignore it. And I actually think them putting it in the footage is them, A, getting out in front of the rumors because everyone's already talking about it. And B, it makes it actually really interesting to watch, knowing that there's one frontrunner from the moment. Because sometimes there is. Like, sometimes the first impression rose wins.

And sometimes there's always going to be, like of the time right in the bachelorette right the girls pick the first guy and they actually know exactly what they're doing so um it's also it's interesting to watch it this way what was also interesting was a few things about blake moines um who it just stole my heart really who. Who's Blake Moines? The one who DM'd her? The one who DM'd her, who's like a, he's in forestry, and he's everything of the sort, and he's so cute. But she said, like, she said that he DM'd her, and she said that he was the only one. And like, up until now, I kind of believe that she was so into Dale because she had spoken to him before. And then by the time she met him out of the limo, like all of their conversations,

like the in-person matched with the online. Yeah. But I don't take her for a liar. So now I'm feeling like maybe they didn't talk before. I don't know. Yeah, I don't know. I didn't get the vibe that they had talked before. And I thought it was really interesting

that she brought up like the rules. And I thought she was going to be like a teacher and send him home and I was I was literally going to turn off the tv right then and there but I actually thought it was really really sweet that she like that not only that he messaged her but that she really appreciated it because I know you know that feeling when it's like you're so lonely and like you literally have nothing to do and like you're just in like a bad place and then like you just get to talk to someone and it's like so refreshing yeah I don't think she answered him though oh from the way she mentioned it like I think that she was going through a lot like obviously her season was postponed her mom had been injured and Blake

just sent her a message like something nice like thinking of her or whatever and she definitely didn't answer because she knew that she couldn't but just seeing it like made like meant so much to her and I I felt what she was saying. Yeah. And I thought it was really nice. I mean, if we had a full season, like, he would definitely probably be her runner-up. Runner-up. Yeah, he's mad cute.

There's just a lot of cuties. It's a really good group of guys. I feel like we always say that about The Bachelor. Like, it's always a really good group of girls. But I don't actually always feel like the group of guys chosen for The Bachelorette are eligible. And I feel like this is probably one of the best casts we've had in a while, just in terms of eligibility, like for Claire. And compatibility.

A hundred percent. Like real men, they're good looking, they're employed, and they're nice. They don't appear to be overwhelmingly thirsty. Agreed. But that remains to be seen. There were a few guys, though. Like, I feel like they're very different from the crop of Bachelor guys that we usually get. But there were a few who were, like, harking me back to, like, the typical.

Like, I feel like that Tyler C. guy is like, maybe you would have cut it two seasons ago, but get the fuck out of here. Yeah, no, you're watching old episodes, doing your research, and that's not going to cut it. Yeah, totally. the fuck out of here yeah no you're watching old episodes doing your research and that's not going to cut it yeah totally um okay so we will keep you updated once a week on our bachelor thoughts next week i think we're back to mondays moving forward and there is you're looking for more bachelor content the snatchler is back and she goes in on everything like she could talk about bachelor forever so head over to the snatch. It's been a while since she's taken up the microphone and we've missed her. We have missed her. So full Bachelor recap, Bachelorette

recap on The Snatchler. Subscribe anywhere you get your podcasts. And before we let you go, it's Wednesday, you guys, which means it's Dear Toasters, our advice segment. If you ever want to write in, email us, deartoasters at gmail.com. We will always keep it anonymous. You can change people's names and you could write in, you know, anything, having relationship trouble, friendship trouble. We've got a mixed bag today. I'm going to dive in

if that's okay with you, Jax. Please do. Hey ladies, thank you so much for being the highlight of my day. You both are beautiful, stunning, and smart. And I died from your Rhode Island pictures. Thanks. Oh my God. Thank you so much. I need help with some TMI slash body hair issues. I just started to seriously date this boy. One of the most serious relationships I've ever had. I've hooked up with other people before in undergrad college, but I've never more seriously.

It's just been drunken hookups. I used to always have my, I used to always shave my vagine when I knew I was going to hook up with someone or going out. Since I started seriously dating this guy, we see each other like four times a week and shaving is too much. I absolutely hate being hairy and unfortunately I'm broke AF, so lasering is not possible right now. I tried sugaring two weeks ago for the first time and I loved it. The problem is my hair is starting to grow back very patchy and I can't wait to go back for a wax for another two weeks.

How do I approach this the next time I see my boy and we hook up? Every time we have hooked up so far, I've been bare down there. And I don't want to ambush him with a patchy bush out of nowhere. Do I give him a heads up about how patchy it is down there? Or do I not say anything at all? Like, do guys care? Please help. Sincerely, Patchy and Confused.

Oh, my God. You're so cute. Guys don't care. Yeah, no. You're being a little specific. Like, okay, if you had a raging bush, he would obviously notice it. But like little patch, little stubble,

like I think you're okay. Even if like you got to the bush sage, to the bush administration, guys do not care, truly. And so I would also just say, try waxing going forward find what works and then get on a schedule yeah I find success with waxing um but I mean everyone's different but I like they're I understand the issue that you are having I think you're overthinking it I think this if this

guy really likes you which just sounds like he does like he's happy to be with you bush or no bush yeah and um just you know enjoy yourself don't don't. Like he's happy to be with you, bush or no bush. And, um, just, you know, enjoy yourself. Don't, don't like, you don't have to be like perfect with a hairless vagina. Like, yeah. And if you know what, you're setting a really bad precedent that like, if you're perfect, perfect, perfect for the beginning and like perfect vagina, like you can never dip. Like you have to always be perfect. Let's say you guys get married. That's 50 years of a perfect vagina. And that's a very difficult know difficult expectation to me yeah so just you know like whenever you can get grooming do it but it doesn't have to be perfect all the time I agree but get on the schedule find what works for you like try a wax I think wax is probably best for you um because you'll get the most amount of time

like in between with with smoothness and from my understanding it doesn't grow back patchy and then have a standing appointment like once every three or four weeks yeah um but good luck and i'm happy that you're in a what sounds like a very healthy and fun fabulous relationship yeah like good luck have fun don't be so hard on your bush and just enjoy your life george bush man all right next up hi jackie and claudia what an honor to be writing in today i just started listening to the toast back in march and it has very literally kept me sane through all of this please never go on vacation again one of my friends let's call her miranda recently moved in with her boyfriend steve steve is a nice guy but

really brings nothing to the table he isn't very exciting he adds nothing to conversations and when he is around he's just there if you know what I mean. Since they've moved in together, they are simply inseparable. Every single time I've seen my friends, whether that's hanging out at somebody's house, going out to drinks, dinner, whatever, he's there. But the weird thing is, she never says he's coming and is almost never invited. He just shows up. My last straw was when we went to a Mexican restaurant last week. We ordered, he ordered a meal and two drinks none of us were drinking and then we split the bill evenly i just want some alone time with my friends before i move back to the city without always having to accommodate steve and pay for his massive burritos not sure how i can bring this up with my friend without offending her but i don't think just because you live with your significant other

that automatically means you're now a package deal sign an annoyed toaster i totally agree just because you move in with someone not only does that mean you're a package deal it should be the opposite you guys are now spending more time than ever together you can actually take a night off yeah um have you tried like mentioned like saying something to her or even like something like hey like wanna I want to have a girl's night just like want to do girl talk like have you tried to be specific about the fact that he is not included aside from just like want to do girl talk like have you tried to be specific about the fact that he is not included aside from just like not inviting him and hoping she won't bring him like I would start small like hey girls night dinner gno gni whatever it is and make it clear that it's just girls

or just friends and if she still brings him to that then like get to a point where you exactly what you said to us you say to her you're not saying anything crazy if she can't separate from steve like some girls turn into that girl honestly and it's unfortunate and their their social life suffers because of it but your shouldn't because your friend is making these choices so i would start with honesty i would start with honesty you have a few different ways you can try it, like levels of intensity before you need to write her off. But I don't think you're there yet. And it's all in the messaging. Like if you're just saying we're going to dinner and he comes, like while that's not normal behavior, I could see how she would think he's invited. But if he explicitly like very Simon Van Campen, like shows up on a girl's trip or like a girl's something,

that is problematic. If it's being branded, if the event has marketing, and the marketing is saying girls night and he still shows up, that's very problematic and you have a big problem on your hands. But if it's just being toted around as a dinner, he might want to come. So it's all in your messaging. If when there's branding he's still showing up, that just means you need to take a firmer hand and spell it out. And then if she doesn't acquiesce you've got problems agreed now our third and final dear toasters is an update from last week on salt and salt and avocado i don't know if you recall um

that was about the toaster who was dating a guy whose girlfriend had passed away and she was like feeling jealous and it was um it was tumultuous um She wrote back, oh my God, thank you for reading this. My apologies for my wording. I meant to say that she had passed six months prior to us started dating. My bad. He did not cheat. Okay. That's what I thought.

But I completely agree that perhaps we're not in the right relationship. He should take the time to grieve. And maybe we're not in the right place for each other. Maybe we're not the right people for each other. Now that 14 months have gone by since she passed away and he doesn't see me as more. Thank you for your unbiased insight and advice. Well, I'm glad we could get that little thing cleared up because we don't want to be, you know, claiming people are cheating if not. But I agree, you know, sometimes it's just like if something is coming too hard, like yes, relationships are difficult. They take work,

but they shouldn't be so hard sometimes, you know? Yeah yeah especially not in the early days and I think grief throws a whole another element into the relationship that was once just you know like two people boy meets girl boy likes girl it's just it complicates everything and so it doesn't sound like he was ready for you and maybe one day he will be but until that time you it's not the place for you and i'm glad you can see that um if you guys ever want to write into dear toasters again please email us dear toasters at gmail.com don't be embarrassed of anything we'll always keep it anonymous and it makes for great segments so dear toasters at gmail.com tonight is the real housewives of

orange county premiere we will be recapping it tomorrow. I am like dread. We went from like the height. We went from having Beverly Hills of New York, Beverly Hills Housewives, New York Housewives, like having premiere TV on to now watching The Bachelorette and The O.C. and it's just depressing. Yeah, that's rough. But we'll see. Let's see how this first episode goes and how it bodes for the rest of the season. Yes, we'll be recapping that tomorrow. Tomorrow. Tomorrow.

Tomorrow, along with all the Fast Five things that you need to know. So make sure you are subscribed and you check it out. Thank you so much for listening to the Morning Toast,

the Millennium Morning Show where we deliver the Fast Five stories that you need to know every morning on YouTube. So if you're watching us on YouTube, please feel free to subscribe and give this video a thumbs up. We're also available as a podcast

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We hope you have an amazing day, hump day. We'll see you tomorrow. Have a great day, guys. Bye. Goodbye. Goodbye. Goodbye.