The Toast - S4 Ep147: Don't Go Chasing Butterflies: Wednesday, August 18th, 2021

Episode Date: August 18, 2021

Try Spritz Society today at https://www.spritzsociety.com/toast The Real Housewives of Dallas Not Returning Next Year (PEOPLE) Kendall Jenner wears Devin Booker's Olympics medal during lake vacation (Page Six) Kylie Jenner confirms she's launching Kylie Swim, shares sneak peek (Page Six) 'The Crown': First Look at Elizabeth Debicki as Princess Diana, Dominic West as Prince Charles in Season 5 (Variety) Carrie Underwood's 'Sunday Night Football' Opening Gets a High-Tech Upgrade (Variety) Dear Toasters Advice Segment The Morning Toast with Claudia (@girlwithnojob) and Jackie Oshry (@jackieoshry) Merch: https://shopmorningtoast.com/ The Morning Toast Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/themorningtoast Girl With No Job by Claudia Oshry: https://www.girlwithnojob.com/bookSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Good morning, Millennials. Welcome back to the Morning Toast. Happy Wednesday, also known here at the Toast as Hump Day. Hey, Claude, how are you doing? Hump Day! Hi! Hi, how are you? I'm a broken woman, but not in the way that you would think. Because, like, you know, I was out all night celebrating Spritz. And honestly, I'm not even hungover.

I think I sprained my ankle. Like, I'm in so much pain. I can't walk. Like, my feet are killing me. I actually can't remember the last time, pre-COVID, where I wore heels for so many hours. Yeah, what happened that you think you sprained your ankle? Like what? There wasn't one particular incident. It was just my feet are currently bearing the brunt of carrying my big fat ass around all day, all night. Oh, so they're just sore. But if nothing happened,

then it's just the effect of your heels. Have you tried taking a warm bath yet? No. And like, I do kind of smell like I was just like, you know, drinking a lot and like dancing and like sweating with people. I'm like, I really need to take a shower. I do kind of smell. I was just drinking a lot and dancing and sweating with people. I'm like, I really need to take a shower. I just got home broken. I understand. When I got home, I took a very warm bath, and it was so, so amazing. Jackie, you know what? You know how to live.

I do know how to live, and you know what gets better? I think you're going to be really proud of me. When I got home, I also ordered McDonald's and I got fries and a McFlurry. And I know I want to end the story here, but unfortunately it wasn't all it cracked. It was cracked up to me. The fries, I'm pretty sure they swept up all the fries that fell on the floor that day, put them in a canister and sent them my way. A canister?

The McFlurry was like a little melty. And I, so I had some fries. Then I got in the bath. I was like, I'll have my McFlurry when I get out of the bath. And I didn't put it in the freezer because like you have to stand it up. And I was like, I'm not going to take that long. It's frozen. You should have put it in the freezer if it was already liquidy. It melted all over the place. And then I put it in the freeze. I didn't get a bite of the McFlurry last night and the fries were from the floor. So it was better in theory than it was in practice. But still, I tried to live my life. Okay. Do you want to know what I ate when I got home? What? I was like, you know what? Let me be good. I'm about to go to sleep. I'll just go to go to bed. And of

course, Ben goes to walk Theo and comes back with a pie of pizza. But I guess like the pizza place was at their wits end like we got the last slice available and so ben opens this box of pizza and it's just like a a melting pot of random slices there was like one with vegetables i was not eating that like at chucky cheese literally and then there were the ones that he got for me what are those square ones not grandma no but it was like sicilian i don't know it was like the fattest fucking piece of pizza it was a big it was a block it looked like a brick i yeah i think that's sicilian i couldn't even look at it let alone eat it and then he got this random like slice with

pasta on it and ziti slice oh my god see i'm just a regular girl i'm a creature of habit all i do i eat cheese pizza like maybe i would like a different kind, but I never eat anything other than what I like. And this pasta, which by the way, like what's fatter than pasta on pizza? Like I'll never understand who thought of that idea. It's like taking your whole meal and putting it in a blender. No, it's like taking your whole meal and putting it on another meal. Like it's so insane. But Jackie, oh my God, it was so insane but jackie yeah oh my god it was

so fucking good and i'm like i think i'm a zd slice girl now no a zd slice can be quite stupendous you know it's so funny i'm like sitting here podcasting and ben is like chit chatting in the bedroom like i'm not here working just give me one second hey ben i'm podcasting no just yeah silence thank you oh my god jeez launches one brand and thinks my brand doesn't Podcasting. No, just, yeah. Silence. Thank you. Oh, my God. Jeez Louise. Launches one brand and thinks my brand doesn't matter anymore. Totally.

Speaking of launches one brand, so last night was the Spritz launch party, and I'm pretty sure it was a bonafide smash hit. Right? I kept, like, walking around not being annoying. I'm like, wait, this party rocks, right? Like, I just need a confirmation because I'm, like, so, like, obsessed with everything I do. I'm like, wait, this party rocks, right? I just need a confirmation because I'm so obsessed with everything I do. I think that everywhere I'm at is fabulous. But most of the time it's not.

And I'm like, you guys, this party is killing it. No, it was pretty off the chain. Such cool, interesting people came through. And everyone adhered to the colorful dress code. For the most part, yes. And it was really fabulous. Obviously, like, everyone's talking about the pool, which looked so stunning. And for those asking, if anyone fell in, yes.

The answer is yes. Yes, one person fell in. And he took it like a champ. And we had some clothes because we had a hotel room. Our party was at the James Hotel on the rooftop. And so we had a room there because people were, like, working. We just had our party was at the James hotel on the rooftop. And so we had a room there. Um, cause people were like working and we just had like stuff there. And he took it like a champ, went into the room, showered, put on some random person's clothes and he looked great.

He looked great. And he came back and it was totally fine. But, and I think, you know, that needed to happen and then no one else would fall in once everyone was talking about like the person that fell in. So it needed to be a cautionary tale and it was it could have happened to someone like worse it could have been like a worse situation but it also could have been better yeah but also you will like you also someone could have gotten hurt you know but he did not and that's what's important yes so that's what happened there what What else happened? I mean, everyone was just really talking about the star of the evening, which was the Spritz Society canned cocktail. Totally. I drank like 11. They were so good. They were so good. They were everywhere. Everyone was enjoying them, talking about

their favorite flavors. If you haven't gotten yours yet, head to SpritzSociety.com slash toast, where we have a special discount code for the toasters on the variety pack. So you can try each of the four flavors and you can let us know what your favorite flavor is and then one day we're gonna do spritz madness and we're gonna get to the bottom are you gonna make it we're gonna get to the yep and we're gonna get to the bottom of the best flavor oh um by the way like it's really hard to throw a fabulous event in new york because even though new New York at one point was a fabulous city, fabulous people don't live here anymore. So like, it's actually really hard to get like cool people

together, but I actually felt like we did a great job of like, you know, cultivating a good celebrity vibe. I think that we did as well. We had some really awesome, influential, stunning, sickening influencers. Matt and Rachel were there. By the way, let's talk about it because first of all, I did not know they were coming. And second of all I'm they were so fucking nice first of all Matt we met Matt once like when we were friends before he was a bachelor when he was like roommates with Tyler and Tyler invited us to a party at his apartment and I'm sure we like said hi and we're being annoying and like we were so unremarkable that like it's shocking so unremarkable and I don't know maybe he was just being like a nice but he was like oh man so nice to see you again i'm like you know me yeah no it was really kind and generous

it was so generous and then rachel first of all every i thought her last name was kirkconnell and then everyone has been referring to her as kirkconnell and i'm like oh i guess i was saying it wrong and then i was just like rachel what's the deal what is your last name and she said it's kirkconnell so just putting that on the record, it's Rachel Kirkconnell. Right. Your instincts were right. Yeah. And she was so nice. And she told us like all of her friends home in Georgia are toasters. So shout out to the Georgia toasters. I know. Cause like Rachel Kirkconnell asked us for a photo. Yeah. Life highlight. Also, I met Hannah Burner last night for the first time. I had never met her.

I don't know why I thought I had. Claudia, I saw her last night for the first time. I was so excited to see her and then I was like, wait, have we ever met? I just feel like I know her from like social media and TV and stuff. And no, I hadn't met her before either. Met her for the first time though. It didn't feel like the first time. No, it didn't feel like the first...

You know I had to do that. Sorry. I know. It's just a shame we don't have at-home triangles. Let me get on Amazon. Click, click, click. So yeah, she was so cool. Oh, and Remy Bader. I honestly hung out with Remy Bader for like most of the night. I was like kind of following her around.

I'm like kind of obsessed. Do you follow her back yet? Yes, of course. Like, first of all, okay, so I posted a picture on my Instagram, my personal Instagram, Claude With No Job, just like a little photo dump, a little duty of the night. And I tagged Remy in a photo. And of course I follow her from GirlWithNoJob, but like who cares about ClaudeWithNoJob? She's so irrelevant.

But Remy was like, excuse me, follow me back. And I did, of course, follow her back. And I got her numbers. Like we're on a texting level now. That is so funny. I'm glad it all worked out for you guys. Also, who was there, fellow redheaded influencer, Shannon Ford. Yes.

Who I'm just like so obsessed with. I want to go ahead and say best dressed. Of course. I mean, like that outfit. I'm like, are you serious? Like showing up to our party and you're going to outdo us like that? Yeah. No.

Like, I mean, just perfect. Stunting on these hoes. So perfect. So colorful. Really such a nice girl. Yes. on these hoes. So perfect. So colorful. Really such a nice girl. Yeah, such a nice girl. Also, Batcheva from that Netflix show and her husband were there. She's so nice.

Like, really such a cute couple. I just feel like it was the place to be last night. It was. It was the place to be. And we were there. I know. And we, like, started it. Yeah.

So it was a really awesome night. Thank you to everyone who placed orders yesterday and is already supporting Spritz Society. Like we're so excited for you guys to try it because we've been drinking it for so long and trust us when we say like not being able to talk about this for the last year and a half, you know, kills us. You know what? It really killed me. Like you know how to like be subtle and like composed and know when to speak when not to speak but to me it's like if there's no product to buy it makes no sense to talk about it no I agree like from a marketing perspective I hate when people like promote things for like months before they come out unless it's a book because a lot of people don't know like you have to promote

your book super hard if you want to get on the New York Times bestsellers list like you can start promoting a year in advance and it all counts towards New York Times. So that's the only acceptable place to promote something nonsensically annoying. No, but like you wouldn't be promoting your book if they couldn't pre-order it yet. Of course. Right. So you can still place an order. That's true. Right. So that's why, you know, we just wanted to spring everything on you guys yesterday when it was ready and everything is ready for you. So again, everybody who ordered, we're so excited for you to try it. And if you haven't ordered yet, SpritzSociety.com slash toast.

And also, we didn't mention why we're podcasting from home, but I think it's just obvious. Like I'm currently wrapped up in a barefoot dreams blanket. My feet are on ice. Like we are just broken women. I gave that party everything I had. There were so many people just like you had to talk and then walk and then talk and then drink and then photos. Like it was just a lot. I still feel like I missed the whole party.

Yeah, I feel you. I woke up with a migraine this morning. So, yeah, I knew I was headed for one. And that's just my cross to bear. So we were in agreement that today was a podcast from home sort of day. And honestly, I'm like usually when we podcast from home, like I still go about my routine a little bit. I at least, you know, open my blinds. Today I'm just sitting like in complete darkness with like one lamp on. Bruno is laying on the bed on my heating pad.

Bruno just discovered my heating pad. I guess I don't know why I never offered it to him before. And now I leave it on all day for him. And this man is in heaven. Oh my God. If I'm using my heating pad and I get up to go pee, I come back Theo's on it. Like I need to get like a full,

like a blanket heating pad that like expands beyond my back. So that Theo has some places to lay too. Yeah. I need to get just another heating pad, like one for me, one for brew. Oh my God. That is so cute.

They should make like two for one doggy heating pads like one human one doggy it's literally the cutest thing he's so cute i actually see him like between your head and your microphone he looks so cute yeah so i'm excited to snuggle back up with him so it's wednesday and of course we're podcasting from home but now it's the third day where Brutadu, a fourth day, cause he was supposed to come on Friday where Brutadu has not joined the toast. Will he be coming tomorrow? Can you give something like for the people to look forward to? I need to confirm, you know what I'll confirm right now with my calendar that I'm not going anywhere directly from the toast tomorrow and I am not. Okay. So I think it's safe to say Brutadu will be coming tomorrow. Is Brutadu, Dadu, Dadu, Dadu coming tomorrow?

Brutadu, Dadu, Dadu, Dadu is coming, yes. Cool. Yeah, so I'm excited for everyone to see him. Again, I'm sorry, like Bruno's mom keeps lying. Bruno's mom is a liar and I just feel like it's better that we know now. That's so hurtful to me. You know,

I fucking love brew. Like he's really elevated his game recently. No, that's what I've been trying to tell you guys. And that's why he has to come to the show. It's like, he's one years old now. Like he's a man.

He knows what he wants. He knows what he's about. And I'm really excited for you guys to see that. I'm excited for today's show. Cause of course we got the fast five, but we do also have our dear toaster segment that was postponed from yesterday because yesterday was such a crazy busy day. Um, but we're back on our grind Wednesday's dear toasters, but I just have to say, we'll see what happens next week, but we're planning on doing it on Tuesdays again. I feel like the shift has just been so like temporary because like I kept moving it with Tyler. Like we are Tuesday's your toasters. Like I just don't want

people to think we're flaky. Like we are Tuesday's your toasters people. I agree. But I do also feel like no, like no shade, but you're drawing more attention to it. I like keep mentioning it and being like Wednesday, Tuesday, last week we said, like, if you just said this week, it's on Wednesday and then we go back to Tuesday and the next you know what I mean like yeah I guess you just feel so guilty that you're like no that's not it that's not it I'm trying to like you know mention it before someone like leaves a podcast review like these girls are so all over the place like they said Tuesday and then Wednesday so I just want to let you know like we know like we're self-aware like we're just trying to run a business in the most organized fashion that we see fit

so I'm not saying it because I feel guilty like this. I don't feel guilty. I didn't do anything wrong. I'm just saying you're acting. You're acting really guilty to hopefully deflect a negative podcast review. That's really what I'm doing. OK, I understand your intentions, but in turn, you're drawing more attention to it. OK, so should I just go?

Like, should I just quit? No, no, no, no no no no no but i think like everyone listening is genuinely okay with like the quick switch you know what let me know leave a comment on our instagram are you okay with what's been going on but then it's a self-fulfilling prophecy for you i know that was like you know the joke no like you created it no don't leave a comment please okay without further ado todo-do-do, it is time for the past five stories that you do need to know before you wake up and take a bite out of your morning toast.

And today's episode is brought to you by a brand new sponsor, Chirp, which is a very appropriate brand here at The Morning Toast because Chirp is a brand dedicated to helping the world feel good so that they can do more of the stuff that they love. They're all about feel good, do more. Chirp creates simple, innovative, and effective pain relief and prevention solutions. They started with a revolutionary wheel for back pain, but they're just getting started. Back pain prevents millions of Americans and people from feeling their best. When they don't feel their best, they're limited to what they can do, but Chirp can help fix that.

Their patent pending spinal canal and three different pressure options to choose from, Chirp will help your back feel better so you can go back to doing what you love in no time. They offer three different pressure sizes, gentle, medium, and deep. Their spinal canal comforts your spine, as does their wheel, and it gives your back four unique ways to stretch. Each wheel can hold up to 500 pounds, and they can be nestled together for easy travel to take with you wherever you go. If you've suffered from back pain, you know how really debilitating it can be and you just can't work. You can't take care of your kids. It's so awful. And I love that Chirp is a brand that's just dedicated to helping you feel better. It's super customized because I have like a very sensitive

and like low level threshold for pain. So I go with the medium pressure size, but if you can take it, try the medium, try the deep male or female ages 20 to 40 who want to relieve back pain, check out chirp, whether it's for fitness, outdoors, yoga, health and wellness, you can do anything. Um, and if you want a promo code toast, the offer is 10% off sitewide and it's go chirp.com G O C H I R P.com. And the promo code is toast for 10% off the entire site. Thank you, Claudia. A pleasure.

Are you ready for our first story? No. Do you know why I, um, I feel like the last like week, every time you say thank you after an ad, I always say it's a pleasure. Do you know why I say that? No, I don't. Do you remember when we were in Tel Aviv staying at the Hilton and we were on phone on the phone with customer service, like we were trying

to get something done like for our bill or whatever. And they put us on hold and this, and they put us on hold for like an hour. And the song that was coming out of the hold machine was, it's a pleasure doing business with you and we were like singing that song do you know what i'm talking about no i don't but that sounds like a really fun time maybe you weren't there maybe it was olivia because i feel like you're not hurtful no i feel like you're not the type of like person on vacation to like you know offer to help with the customer service thing or to make up a dance to the whole music? It's a pleasure doing business with you. It was not a pleasure doing business with the Hilton.

Okay, well, thank you for that interlude and explanation. It's a pleasure. Stop, go away. Are you ready for our first story? You should get ready for our first story because it's actually something that you literally said yesterday. Oh my God, I know.

The Real Housewives of Dallas are not returning next year the future of the real housewives of dallas is unclear the bravo series which most recently aired its fifth season will not be returning for a sixth year bravo confirmed on tuesday there are currently no plans to bring back the real housewives of dallas next year a spokesperson for the network told people. As for the possibility for future seasons premiering at a later date, they said nothing official has been decided. Well, let me just say this. It's worth mentioning that the show wasn't canceled. It's just not coming back. But also, The Real Housewives of Miami still technically has not been canceled. And now, what is it, 10 years later, they're being revived on Peacock. So Bravo doesn't really

cancel Housewives, except they did cancel Real Housewives of DC, which I do feel like wasn't given a fair chance. But I do think it's, first of all, I'm not surprised by this in the sense that like, I literally said yesterday, at any minute, it feels like the Real Housewives of Dallas could be canceled. Like there's not a huge following. There's not good ratings. But the only reason I was remotely shocked is because I've been hearing like a lot of casting news. I heard they were casting this influencer named Elizabeth. Like, so I've been hearing a lot of like things coming out.

A lot of the women were just together. I thought, I just assumed that they were filming. So yeah, that's why I'm surprised. But I'm not surprised that the show in general isn't coming back. I agree with you. I do think, I think that they had to have filmed something in the last few months and it probably just wasn't good enough. And because we did hear this casting news, the group was hanging out.

Everyone was acting like they were filming and it didn't feel like they were putting on an act. So I feel like they filmed something for the season. It's just like not good. And they're going to take a little break from Dallas and see what happens. I didn't realize that Miami wasn't canceled. It was just like suspended. Yeah, like because they always are open to like bringing stuff back.

But I also think it's weird that they wouldn't maybe. OK, if the viewership is not great, like why not make it a peacock show? Yeah. okay if the viewership is not great like why not make it a peacock show yeah like i feel like that would actually like it's end up being like a really good thing for bravo where like the franchises that aren't great but like have potential get to be on peacock and until they get like good enough then they can come to bravo you know yeah but then peacock is just like a wasteland for shows that aren't good enough. Yeah. But there are people, a present company included, who will watch a housewives franchise. Like even if it's bad, like there are just housewife fans, you know? Yeah. I agree with that. I mean, I like Dallas. I don't know if it's just cause I really liked so many of the women, like on a personal level.

By the way, that's what it is. The show was never really that good. The women were amazing. They just have some like really great women who who you just want to watch on television, but together it just, I don't know, maybe, I don't know what it is in the water that just made it very conflict-averse. Yeah, and when you look at, for me, I'm devastated because Dallas Housewives is one of the very rare franchise where everyone is rich. And like the houses and the cars, like it really was a fabulous insight into the upper echelon of Dallas high society. And there were some gems, like, of course, Stephanie Holman, it was an is and was an amazing housewife.

Deandra Simmons, I think, is like such a pro. I think she could be thrown into any franchise and she was just like a great housewife. Deandra Simmons, I think, is like such a pro. I think she could be thrown into any franchise and she was just like a great housewife. I loved Tiffany her most recent season. And Cameron Westcott was a very interesting housewife. Like, so it's not for lack of trying. I just want to say like, it was very well edited. I just think there was something about this group

that like wasn't working. Yeah, but I don't know if it's, even if they brought in new people, maybe it would work better because maybe the new people would be like a little bit more cutthroat. Maybe these ladies just had like too much to lose and just weren't willing to go there, go there with each other. But I don't know. I, it makes sense. That's actually a really good point. They talk a lot about how like Dallas high Society is very kind of like nose in the air. And I imagine being on the show like isn't great for your social standing, but they never really got crazy. You know, the fights were not.

Well, they only got crazy with Leanne. Leanne. And no, only Leanne got crazy. So do we do you bring back someone like Leanne who's just like this disruptor? No. No. No.

It was time. Like, it was time. When I was seeing the ratings for this most recent season, like, I knew our time was up. Like, I did. Damn. I mean, I was really excited

to see these new cast members, especially the one that we had heard was joining Elizabeth. Like, I was excited. Me see these new cast members, especially the one that we had heard was joining Elizabeth. Like, I was excited. Me too. But it's not meant to be. No, it's not meant to be. And that's just, it's too bad. It is too bad. You hate to see a house.

But you know what? Like, not every franchise can just live on in perpetuity. And you know what? For the content plate. I know. It's a relief. No, I know. I like need the Real Housewives of New York to get canceled too. Oh my God. Suffice it to say, we did not watch last night.

Right. We didn't watch last night. I don't think Real Housewives of New York will ever be canceled. Just like. It's an institution. It's an institution. What would you want to see go next? I would love to see OC go, but it's the first one.

Yeah. No, the thing, what's so funny is that like the OG franchises are the two I could live without, Real Housewives of Orange County and New York at present moment. That doesn't mean I don't, you know, respect the history of the franchise. I do. I've seen every episode of every, but over the last couple of years, I've dreaded watching OC and New York. Yes, I agree. Okay. next story, some cute couple news. Kendall Jenner wears Devin Booker's Olympic medal during lake vacation. Kendall is going for the gold. NBA star Devin Booker snapped a rare photo of his girlfriend wearing his Olympic gold medal as she lounged on a boat during their lake getaway. Booker took home the prize medal as a result of his

participation on Team USA's basketball team. So this is a really cute, iconic photo. And these two don't give us a lot, but it does feel like whenever and whenever they give us something, it's really, it's beautiful. No, they give us nothing. But it also does feel like in the last couple months, we've been getting way more from them than we've ever gotten before. Yes, because like they are now together for over a year. I'm sure like in those early months of a celebrity relationship, it's like you want to protect your relationship. You also don't know if it's going to work out. You don't want everybody's opinions.

But the longer that you're together, like the more comfortable you are in the really like I just I think that's pretty natural. And now just seeing something like this, it just really it upsets me thinking about how much stuff we've missed over the last year especially because kendall's like such a photographer and a model like their content is very very premium and it's very premium i can imagine their shared album that they have of things they've never posted is just full of like gorgeous sexy premium ass content high quality artistic iconic i agree and that's what I felt about this photo like it's really quite artistic like in the shadows and even the American flag in the back with the metal like it's all it's it's so beautiful and Kendall is a photographer so it's

like is Devin have a little bit of photo chops too or you know was one of her photographer friends on the boat or like did Kendall like really edit this photo, add the shadows, you know? No, no, I don't. Or, but did she like set up a tripod? Totally. I mean, I, I kind of like don't want to live in a world where Kendall Jenner took this photo on a tripod. Uh, no, me neither. Like I want to live in a world where Devin Booker took it, but you're telling me he's like an, uh, an Olympic level basketball player and he's, you know, Annie Leibovitz. I mean, the thing is, is like you really never know people. People, as Wendy Zen Wen said, don't put me in a box.

He could be both. It's true. No, and I'm not trying to put anyone in a box. It sounds like you are. No, no. I'm just saying most people don't get that many talents. You get your talent, you know? Okay.

I think maybe we're taking this a little far. Like it's just an Instagram photo. No, but like, listen, if that, like if that were me and Zach, like that picture would not look like that. Okay. For a number of reasons. Well, that's because like, and same with Ben, like they just don't care. Maybe the thing is, is that Devin Booker cares.

That's a beautiful thought no and and now I'm thinking I'm like I'm so happy for her she has a partner in life who cares what about this what if it's not that he cares what if it's just that Kendall Jenner can't take a bad picture yeah but the thing is like because if this were someone else with those shadows I'd be like and Zach took the exact same picture of me i'd be like are you fucking kidding me i'm backlit like it's actually maybe the photo is terrible but we're just like blinded because kendall's so beautiful and there's like a gold medal and she's like on a lake how bad could it be like maybe it's a terrible maybe it's a classic boyfriend photo yeah but like because she's a supermodel like we're just like it's amazing i can't believe we didn't even think of that.

I think that's it. I'm so glad we got to the bottom of this. That's what we do here at the Toast. We get to the bottom of nonsensical things. Wow. OK, I feel prepared to actually move on because our next story is about her sister, Kylie, who confirmed she's launching Kylie Swim and shared a sneak peek of one of her swimsuits. Kylie confirmed she's launching a swimwear line,

teasing the collection with a series of Instagram stories on Wednesday. She snapped a mirror selfie in a skin-bearing one-piece writing, working on at Kylie Swim and I can't wait to share. The collection appears to include a range of sunset-hued styles, as she also shared an on-set peek at Polaroids of the line before snapping a close-up of herself in an orange cutout one-piece. So usually when Kylie launches a brand, people are able to figure it out either through the trademark

or like who she's following on Instagram. Like we knew about Kylie Baby before it was a thing. I've not heard anything about Kylie Swim, so I was genuinely surprised at this announcement. I think other people had heard stuff, like had been, you know, following more closely than you and I. I was genuinely surprised by this announcement, too. I guess it like makes sense.

And she's taking on a lot right now. So I just, you know, but I know people think she's pregnant. So wouldn't you if everything you touch turned to gold? No, literally, if I had like the power of Kylie, like I would literally be launching a tire business. Like I would do everything. Kylie tires, Claudia's tires. I think that that would do really, really well. Like I would make auto shops. Like I would get into every possible business. Cause you know, the economy, some businesses are good somewhere. Like I would do hotels. I would do auto shops. I would do hardware stores. I would do drug stores. Like I would do everything.

Yeah. And that's what she's doing with you. She, that's what she's doing. Her next venture is into swim. I mean, she looked so amazing in the swimsuit. I personally wouldn't.

Oh my God. I just like, I was just thinking like, what if I put that bathing suit on? Like, honestly, it would be traumatizing. I found the whole thing offensive for real

no but like where are you supposed to put your rolls at where are you supposed to put your tits your vagine like it was just it was a contraption it was a harness no it was like it's not for everyone no but you know it it looks amazing on her and i like the colors and i i you know, it looks amazing on her. And I like the colors. And I, you know, I like to see creativity and female entrepreneurship. And by the way, like the influencer swim space is actually very popular. Like I feel like a lot of the most popular brands for bathing suits are from influencers. Like Monday Swim is like so popular. And it was started by influencers. Right.

What else? Francesca Farago has a really popular, oh, I'm sorry, Siesta Key. True. Also, Chez Marie has a great line of swimsuits. Same swim. Like, yeah. That's very true.

So. That's a really good point, but I also do feel like when you, say you needed to go buy bathing suits. Well. Sorry, I don't want, I don't want to like put you in a bad head space. I don't want to put you in a bad head space. I don't want to put you in a bad headspace.

That's okay. Keep going. Say you need to go buy bathing suits. Where do you go? Where do you go first? Well, the thing is I require industrial strength bathing suits that are literally like a girdle. So I go to a few places. I go to Miracle Swim, which is the best.

Swimsuits for All is great. And I have many a time gone to Monday Swim because they have like a whole line for people with enormous tits. So I just feel like there's two types of people. Ready? People who can wear bathing suits that cost $15 and people who have to spend over $100 on a bathing suit

just because of the like girth and the quality. Over $100 on the top. Right. And over $100 on the bottom. the fact that there are people on the bottom who just like waltz into target and like oh what a cute bikini you know what do that under 12 no justice for target because target has cute stuff but the fact that there are people who can scroll their instagram and like see an instagram ad for a bathing suit and be like i like how that looks and then just buy it that right there's no other thinking like strategy required

i genuinely can't relate no not whatsoever not at all i need to take measurements my swimwear needs to meet like about eight criteria 100 like the people who are running around and this trend is actually killing me with the low back pieces, where's the support for the breasts? It's insane. Like not even a strap. On my bachelorette party, you guys like all got bathing suits. One piece is like brides, bridesmaids. It was like so cute and I put it on and I'm like, where do my boobs go?

The fact that there's not one lumber of support for your breasts in the back is insane. I understand what you're talking about. No, the move is you got to wear a bra with it and then like a little kimono and like a cardigan to cover the bra in the back. No, totally. Yeah. Or, or you have to get it in such a small size that it's so tight and that things can't move. But then your labias are popping out, like your vagina rolls are popping out. Shorts. No, I'm just actually going to show up in a winter coat, like with the bathing suit underneath just to cover everything. Yeah, no. So what I was just saying, it's swimsuits. I still feel like even though there's so many brands and so many amazing brands, and I actually

have a few brands that like are my go to's and I have like three styles of swimsuits in 12 colors. And that's my I do feel like it's a category that isn't owned yet by anyone I feel like for a while Victoria's Secret Swim yes when we were in high school was really popular and then they just canceled it and pivoted towards athleisure and I feel like there's a gap there and I feel like Kylie is maybe I mean not with what she's shown us because these swimsuits aren't for everyone but you know I'm sure she's got more you know what sleeve skims should do bathing suits i would trust that no like even the skims bandeau and the skims bralette like with a pair for the skims high-waisted underwear like i would wear that as i like the cut of all of that just make

it make it in water material no totally like there you're you're a hundred percent right like there is not there are a couple good brands of for sure like my hundred percent right. Like there is not, there are a couple of good brands of for sure. Like my go-tos, but there is not, I feel like what's that brand. I have one of their bathing suits and every time I go on the website, I get targeted for a month with ads. It's called like salt, summer salt. Yeah. They're pretty good, but they don't have enough styles and they like, they have one style. It's like color blocking, like do something else. So my, my favorite bathing suit brand is actually most of my bathing suits are Tula Rosa from Revolve. They have some great hold and high-waisted options.

I also like the brand Casa Kai. If you go to their website, you'll recognize every single bathing suit as ones I've been wearing for the past five years. And there was one more brand that I like. What is it? Oh, I sometimes like Frankie's bikinis if I can get it, you know. The right triangles on your tits. The right shape.

I have to order, like, small, medium, large to see which one fits. You just never know. But I have two successful bathing suits. Good. I'm happy for you. So I don't know if this is what Kylie's intending, but like I just, I need a swimwear line like for real people. And I, from what I've seen, I don't think that this is what it is.

No, but maybe she just like wanted to post a buzzy pic. Yeah. Not like, not, you know, the, the utility every day. Yeah. Like I literally, like my bathing suits are made out of duct tape like they're so fucking tight like i need bathing suits so much money that's why i'm always wearing the same fucking three bathing suits because i spent six hundred dollars on all three of them claude i need bathing suits made out of tires kylie's tires that's next for her.

I'm down. Okay, well, congratulations to Kylie. I always love to, like, you know, see what the girls are up to. And this is exciting. Very. Are you ready for our next story? Yeah. First look pictures at Elizabeth DeBecky as Princess Diana and Dominic West as Prince Charles for The Crown season five have emerged. And I need to know your thoughts. There's one pic of Dominic as Prince Charles. With his season five have emerged. And I need to know your thoughts.

There's one pic of Dominic as Prince Charles. With his hands in his pockets. Yeah, that's the story. And that's the whole story. Well, obviously posted on our Instagram. It was, okay, so I saw the picture of Elizabeth DeBecky. She looked great. I think even, you know, not in costume, she does resemble Princess Diana.

And so I'm not worried at all. And we've spoken a lot about how we were very concerned about Dominic West. Like we don't know if he had the acting chops. And for the most part, everyone in the crown is like not famous yet or like recognizable. So it's just perfect, you know? And I, my concerns were not at ease after seeing this photo. They were actually worse because of course he looks like Prince Charles because that's what Hollywood Netflix, you know, hair and makeup budget. That's not what I'm worried about. I'm worried about him as an actor and as a person, like I know too much about him. He's not Prince Charles. He's the guy from the affair and he's the guy who was caught with Lily James running around town. Yeah. So I,

I hear you and I receive all of that. But maybe because I was coming from an even harsher place against Dominic West for the role, when I saw this picture, my fears were somewhat alleviated because I was able to see Prince Charles in there. I still see Dominic and I still see Noah and I still see that horrible fucking show, The Affair, that like ruined weeks of my life and I never even finished it because it was so fucking terrible and they really thought they did something no they really thought they were doing something that is true that's true like like with the different perspectives and like how when it's rose's perspective her dress is longer and when it's like noah's perspective her dress is shorter

and she's like at like coming on to him a him 100 right i don't agree with you that the show was bad because i liked it but they thought that they were changing the world with that like two perspective different color thing right and like they really really thought but you know what when i was watching just that like it didn't even bother me yet it's like the place that the show eventually ventured to was so terrible. Which place? Like after he goes to prison and then like Brendan Fraser. Yeah, that was a really bad season. Yeah. No, it was.

But that's not even when I stopped watching. I blocked it out of my memory. Anyways, I don't want to go back to this place. Also, wait, really quickly. Speaking of Brendan Fraser, do you know that he's like the biggest P-Chum on planet Earth? I believe it. He like doesn't

really do press or anything but this interview he did went viral i saw it on tiktok you have to watch it he's just being so cute that's really cute why don't you send me stuff like that because you're not on tiktok and you know what like you can only watch the first 15 seconds because you're watching him on saf like a grandma. And now TikTok. You know, I've always had suspicions. Now TikTok has three minute videos. They have three minute videos. And I'm not going to send you something.

I always was suspicious that I wasn't getting the whole video, but I could never confirm my suspicions. Yeah, you only get like the first. They want you to download the app. Hmm. Not happening. Anyways, Dominic West. So I did feel assuaged by this photo and I'm going to give him a chance. Assuaged?

I felt assuaged. I love feeling assuaged. But you didn't feel assuaged. I don't even know what that means. I'm assuming like your opinion was swayed. In a way, yes, yes. Assuaged, like suede like comforted oh okay that's a good word thank you i love to share new words really quickly because i just got a pr pack it's sitting right in front of me i got dorinda's book okay did you see the fight in dorinda medley's

comment section i did thanks to toasty after dark yes somebody posted it in our facebook group and i swear it's something i never would have seen and i'm so glad someone posted it because it was insane so basically she put up this picture of like her house and there's like a peacock in it and she's talking about how like she can feel richard her ex-husband who passed away like his presence no well she said like richard and i finished the book like oh is that what she said it was even more personified than that oh okay so she said it was a picture of the peacock and she said richard and i like wrote the book or something like that okay you know let me just go yeah yeah you tell the story i'm gonna go find it so then someone commented and like was confused i

guess they didn't know who richard was and she has this picture of a peacock okay this is it she said we did it richard and. She said, we did it. Richard and I, no, sorry. We did it. Richard, I have published a book and I'm home, our home. And the picture is of a peacock in her house. Got it. So somebody left a comment.

And what was the comment? They said, does Richard come with the Airbnb rental? Heart emoji, heart eye emoji. So of course, if you know the context, you're like, that's fucking rude. Like, does the ghost of her dead husband come? Like, that's rude. But the picture makes it seem like she has a peacock named Richard. Right.

And Dorinda, like, wrote back being like, you're clever, right? Unkind at best. Let's play this idiot, mean, mean idiot. Let's play this. Yeah, my dead husband is coming. You good now? And the girl wrote back, oh, my God, oh dorinda this is totally i totally forgot your husband's name was richard i love the peacock oh my god i'm sorry nothing but love i miss you on the show heart heart and then

dorinda replied apologize for you disrespect to my husband don't mention his name okay first of all the typing is so dorinda like after she's had a few martinis. I could hear her in the comment. And this poor girl. And she's clearly a fan. Of course. It's just really sad to watch. So I just wanted to say I got the book and she does look glorious.

Like these are some of the best photos. It's obviously taken at um bluestone i have to assume on the front and back oh look there's a peacock behind her is there on the back cover there is dead um so i just wanted to share that story because i just i wanted to die while reading it yeah no it's particularly bad are you ready for our fifth and final story it's a little final story it's a little sports music tech news smtn smtn carrie underwood's sunday night football opening is getting a high tech upgrade oh this is, so if you guys don't know about me and Claudia, one of our favorite songs of all time is Waiting All Day for Sunday Night.

Oh, Sunday night. Oh, Sunday night. Stand on the floor, stop cracking. Got a real good feeling. Sunday night about to happen. Whoa, whoa, whoa. It's the little commercial they play before Sunday night football. Carrie looks sickening. It's her song with Miranda Lambert that they rejiggered to make a football moment.

And it's just so American and amazing. It's such an amazing moment. And every year, she gets her upgrade. And this year, she's getting a very serious high- upgrade using same technology as they use for The Mandalorian. So they're going to be using this technology to put Carrie at virtual football tailgates while performing Waiting All Day for Sunday Night. The shoot was conducted at an industrial light and magic soundstage using virtual technology recently utilized in The Mandalorian. The singer has opened the program with various segments since 2013. NBC will augment her performance with user-generated videos

from fans at their own tailgates as well as from NFL stars, all of which will be updated each week to reflect current events. We have to make one. We have to make one. But also, I mean, this isn't the first time they're using this technology, but every time you watch the thing the thing she says both team names they show they like they make a custom version for every single game depending on like who's playing i've always wondered if she records singing each team's name like both no i feel like she has to record every team's name and then they like copy and

paste it into the song yes no but like she'll say browns verse jets and so she has to record every team's name and then they like copy and paste it into the song yes no but like she'll say browns verse jets and so she has to say browns verse jets i can't think of another team name so she has to sing every team name in the same trope as brown and then she has to sing every team name in the same trope as Brown. And then she has to see every team name in the same trope as Jets. You've thought about this a lot. I think about it every time. Round versus Jets. Okay, sorry. And now the videos are going to be even more custom.

And I'm just so glad I'm not going to be wondering every time I watch like how they got this footage. Okay, well, it feels like they're opening the door more and more. Like we're learning more and more about Sunday night. They're being really transparent with the fans. And I appreciate that. I wonder if they know that like that song has a cult following. Not the original with Miranda Lambert, but the...

No. Oh, Sunday night. I think that they do because they put a lot of effort into it. Like it used to be Faith Hill. They take it very seriously. And I just, like, I wonder if everybody, like, whenever my husband's watching football, like, I don't always watch. Usually I actually don't. But, like, if it's Sunday night, like, rewind.

We're watching the song. Of course. And then you can watch your game. Like, it's just, like, to me it's like the national anthem. Like, who's performing? Is it Browns versus Jets? I want to hear it. And I love that Carrie's been doing this for so long and she's just like looking better and better.

But it's interesting to think about who will be the next Carrie, the next Faith. Who do you think it's going to be? Okay, not that this is in any way like an upcoming issue, pressing issue that we need to think about. So it's even possible that the next person isn't even on our radar yet. Or they're not even alive yet true i don't know i feel like it could be kelsey ballerini i knew you were gonna say that because everyone says like kelsey is like the young carrie i don't see it it's possible or marin i just or marin yeah i don't know. I could... No.

No. I actually feel like whenever the time comes for it to be someone other than Carrie, I feel like they will choose someone, like, from the pop music world. Why? It's, like, such a country thing. I just... I feel like... It's the one thing country has.

Let them have it. Country is becoming more pop, and I i just i feel like they'll choose you know julia michaels don't ruin it no no i said what i said i'm i'm banking on kelsey no i i think that's just like too obvious so obvious like not and not even in an obvious way i feel that you know what i mean well good thing we don't have to think about it for a hundred more years yeah no because it should be carrie forever and with new technology she can do it from anywhere yeah no they can make like a hologram of her long after she's gone yeah no it's gonna be carrie forever it's like phil of the

future exactly um well those were the past five and i definitely feel super educated i feel so you needed to know them i really really do um well the show's not over yet because we've got dear toasters which is our advice segment which we do every week depends which day um so if you ever want to write in it's dear toasters at gmail.com and of course we will always keep you anonymous. And today's Dear Toasters is brought to you by Liquid Death. You guys may start noticing new, strange tall boys of beer in the bottled water section of your local stores. Well, it's not beer.

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And if you want to get free shipping on all water and merch, go to liquiddeath.com slash toast. That's liquiddeath.com slash toast. Or you can grab Liquid Death at Whole Foods or 7-Eleven. Check it out. Okay, ready for Dear Toasters? Yes. Okay, here we go. Dear Claudia and Jackie, A1 since day one here.

What does that mean? I don't know. I think that, you know, we're not current. No, but I think that means she's like an OG listener. A1 since day one. I don't know. I'll look at Urban Dictionary. Well, she's finally ready for some of our sage advice.

I have been married to a P-jom for almost four years, and we are expecting our first bed this Christmas we are super excited but I gotta say pregnancy is kind of not great and I've never felt so out of sorts with my body my husband Jack is planning on going on a boys beach trip at the end of this month with some of his co-worker friends I'm close with them and one of the wives is also pregnant the problem is my husband let on that some of the guys are planning on bringing some extracurricular drugs and making plans to hit a few local strip clubs during their boys weekend. I feel weird asking my husband to stay at the condo while the other guys go out

because I'm not usually the jealous type. I'm not like other girls, except maybe I am. Am I crazy for feeling super pissed that I'm going to be at home pregnant while my husband and his stupid friends hit strip clubs and do God knows what? Should I just count this as his last wild weekend before the baby arrives or should I break his guy code and tell the other wives about the secret plan so we can all nag the shit out of them about it? I hear I can't get past the fact that I'll be at home feeling the worst I've ever felt about my body while my husband spends our joint account money at a motherfucking strip club. I don't know how to figure it out if it's just my hormones making me crazy

or I'm validated in being pissed about this whole thing. Love, a sad hormonal toaster. You're so justified, but I just want to say the answer here is not telling the other wives. That makes you like a snitch. Yeah, I don't think that we need to do that just yet. I'm trying to put myself in your position and it's definitely super frustrating.

If he's going to go and do drugs already, that's annoying. Consider he's going on a boys weekend. But you know what? I think we can let it slip. But the idea that you will be able to say that when you were at home pregnant, your husband was at the strip club, it's just not something that should ever be a fact of your life. So you need to tell him that.

Yeah. I think the answer here is just talking to him. And tell him it like saying like that. And if he still doesn't get it, maybe like tell his mother, you know, like your son is going to the strip club when his wife's at home pregnant. Like the more you say it, the more unacceptable it sounds. Yeah. No, totally. Do not be a snitch like then like if

these are like his real friends like then you just become like the snitch like you don't want that but your marriage is important i feel like if you just talk to him like yo like i'm literally here carrying our baby i was gonna let you go but this is taking it too far like my ankles are swollen and you're at the strip club like how does that does that fare? No. And it's like, I will let you go on your boys weekend. I will let you do drugs, but I draw the, so you can give him those two things, but I draw the line at the strip club and I don't think that's asking a lot.

No. And like, honestly, it really sounds like a bad plot from like a reality TV. Like, you know, the pregnant girl at home while her husband's at a strip club. Like it's just not good. And then like your friends find out, your friends find out and you're there like,

your husband was at the strip club when you were pregnant. No, totally. Like you just don't want to be associated with this. Like a boy's just not good. Yeah and then like your friends find out your friends find out and you're they're like your husband's at the strip club when you were pregnant. No totally like you just don't want to be associated with this like a boy's trip is fine you know they want to smoke weed whatever like it's fine but we draw the line at strip club and I really feel like you're not unreasonable for sitting him down don't be like overly emotional just be like I'm having a hard time running like wrapping my head around the fact like you're going to a strip club and I am sitting here like wanting like feeling the worst I've ever felt about myself like that's just not that's just not how I saw my pregnancy and I think we need to talk no that's not how I saw my life totally but also um I think the fact that he told you that like or or did the other wife tell her no I feel like he's definitely

a p-jamb and he just like doesn't know that his actions are so unacceptable. Because it's like if you can go on a boys trip while your wife's at home, who cares what you're doing on the boys trip? But it's just the idea of at the strip club while your wife's pregnant. Yeah, also. It's just not going to fly. I reread. Her husband was the one who told her about the drugs at the strip club. So he's obviously like an honest guy.

Yeah, I don't have an issue with him, but he's obviously taken your leniency a little too far. And so you just got to reel him back in. Yeah, every now and then. That's not what I meant. That's not what I meant when I said you could go. Right. Every now and then a husband just needs like a quick reminder who's in charge. And it's you.

Like you're fucking pregnant. You're in charge. It's your world. He's just living in it. No. And like you could also just like if he if for some reason he defies what you say and goes, like obviously you're going to call the credit card company fraud. Of course.

And you're going to like embarrass him in front of all his new stripper friends. His card gets declined at the strip club. Like that's embarrassing. That's a punishment that's worthy of the crime. Yeah. Okay, well good luck with that. Before he even goes, you should call it in. Yeah, just like.

Be like, cancel this number. Totally. but actually before he even takes off they ruined his they had scored him off the plane like sir your credit card's been declined you can't go your wife is waiting for you outside pregnant yeah oh were you leaving your pregnant wife and then he's like embarrassed on the plane like uh like oh no it was just a boy's weekend like oh yeah sure she said it could go love that um all right next up hello dearest steens i come to you both with a predicament involving both a wedding and a funeral this september a couple that my boyfriend and i are friends with are getting married about six hours north of at the bride's family cabin they booked

additional cabins for the 35 guests to stay in like wedding crashers. And it's going to be a super fun long weekend following the celebration of their wedding on a Friday evening. Unfortunately, a relative of mine whom I was close to passed away from cancer this week and they've scheduled his celebration of life service at his specific church on the same day as the wedding. Here's some logistics to consider. The church service is at 1 PM. It would be a six hour car drive after afterwards for me to try to get to the wedding. The church service is at 1 p.m. It would be a six-hour car drive afterwards for me to try to get to the wedding. The wedding starts at five, but the soonest I could arrive would be eight. I let the bride and groom know, and I informed them that my boyfriend, who was their

friend first, would still be partaking in the wedding festivities from Thursday to Sunday with the other 30-plus people. I would still like to drive up and join the reception as soon as I could. This was the response I got from the groom. So these are weird circumstances, but it would mean a lot to us if you both were able to make it for the ceremony. Is there any chance that it would be possible for you to be there at this point? Our wedding was intentionally pretty small. We chose these dates in advance so our close friends and family could attend, and we would be really sad if you weren't able to make it.

Steens help. I feel so awkward, and it's sucky that they're trying to guilt me about a funeral as if i wouldn't rather be having fun at their wedding i feel guilty that they could have given my spot to anyone else but i'm willing to drive alone to join in when i can my parents are saying a six-hour drive alone is unsafe and i should miss the funeral and i should just miss the funeral and go to the wedding however i feel so conflicted since there was such a close relative who died so quickly should i skip the funeral church service to go to a wedding? Would my loved one want me to go celebrate friends instead of being in a six-hour car ride alone? Should I tell the bride and groom that they're being hurtful and unfair by forcing me to choose?

SOS, a very conflicted toaster slash wedding guest slash funeral attendee. Can you just say one more time the relation of the person who passed away? She just said loved one? she just said super close relative so what do you think that is i don't think it's an immediate family member i think it's probably not like a grand a cousin or a grandpa immediate is just like brother sister mother father of course of course that wouldn't be a question yeah i think it's like grandparent or cousin the fact that the bride and groom are even giving you a pit about this, like selfish, knows no bounds. I can't even. Like, just so crazy. I agree. You shouldn't have to worry. No, brides are getting out of control. No, they are. And I guess they get this like one chance and then like, fine. And also the fact that the groom

wrote it. Like, sit down. No, literally. So this is a really tough spot. I think you just have to do what your conscience tells you is right. Because if you miss this funeral to go to a wedding, like, what are the odds you're going to have fun at this wedding? Like, personally, I would have a pit the entire time. Like, I would rather do the right thing, like, and not have as much fun just Just for like my own like conscience. But also I think it's like we don't have a lot of context on who the person is who passed away. Because like there are some people who like you know they would want you to like go have fun with your friends. And not be like you know crying in a church.

Like for me like if you have the Met Gala the same day as my funeral. Like I'm saying right here right now. Like you go to the Met Gala. Like I don't want my death to be a burden. You know. It just depends on the person. Yeah, that's true. Just letting you know, like, I wouldn't go to the Met Gala over your funeral for, like, so many different reasons.

One, because, like, the Met Gala looks so not fun anymore. I just read that article in Page Six. So crazy. I'm saying you get invited to Kim's birthday party on a private island. Kardashian Christmas. I'm telling you right here, right now, you better go, bitch. You better. And I'm telling you, I don't know what I would choose because now I have a real

DeAndre's choice on my hands. But I think like in order to live with myself, I would go to your funeral. But even though I'm here real in life telling you like if the opportunity presents itself, like I want you to go to the island. No, I just like, I don't want to be the person who would choose Kim Kardashian's birthday over my sister's alleged hypothetical funeral. And even if you would want that for me, like that's just not who I want to be. Okay. So anyways, we're getting off track.

Look inside your heart. I can't tell you what to do. Cause I don't know who this relation is to you, what relative and how close you were. And like, you know, if you're just going because like your whole family's going and you should go or because like it's deeper than that. So I would just say, look inside your heart, tune out the noise, make the decision that you want to live with. That's really good advice. No pressure, the decision that you want to live with. That's really good advice.

No pressure. No pressure, yeah. Like, just be able to live with yourself. Yep. All right, our third and final, dear toasters. Dear Claudia and Jackie, I really need help from two ladies who are in successful marriages. I'm 28 and have been with my loving boyfriend for three years, but thinking about getting engaged does not make me feel good about us. I can't figure out what's normal in a relationship, which is why I need your help.

Is it normal to not have butterflies after three years? They have disappeared completely. There's nothing wrong with him. He's perfect in every way, but I can't tell the difference between something that has fizzled and something that is just long-term. I've tried to spice things up, go on dates, et cetera, but it's not working. Recently, I had a work crush. I work in healthcare and kept getting really intense butterflies when this guy would talk to me. Totally not my type, but we work with helping children. So maybe that's what it was. Have I made this up in my head? Please help.

Is this normal? Love from the toaster who lost her butterflies. I just have to say, like, don't listen to what you read in books, to what you watch in movies. Like the butterflies literally go a month in. Like they're gone. And I think like, I'm just saying people who are just so unrealistic, like, oh, every time you walk in the room, I get butterflies.

No, like I saw you five minutes ago. Like there's no butterflies. Like I just need that to be said. And I feel like I really love Ben. Like we have an amazing marriage. Like, but butterflies are for dating. Like once you get to the stage where you're farting in front of each other, like, of course there's no butterflies.

And the butterflies, if you feel, you farted at the butterflies, and if you feel them, it's just gas. 150%, and I just want to say, do not live your life trying to chase butterflies, because then you'll get into a great relationship with someone who gives you butterflies. Then the butterflies go away, as they naturally do. And then you find butterflies somewhere else. Say you jump into that relationship. Those butterflies will go away, as they naturally do. You cannot go chasing butterflies to not feel butterflies after go chasing butterflies

just to not feel butterflies after three years of course three minutes you know like maybe once every blue moon say you guys are like getting ready for a wedding and your man shows up like looking so handsome and you're like warm fuzzy feeling like those things happen in long-term relationships like once a year once once a decade no okay you're but I do feel like maybe you're just not happy expressing no no yeah maybe you're not expressing what what you're feeling in a way that we're able to understand. Because you're saying you're trying to do date nights and spice things up, like, just because you're waiting for butterflies to flutter or because, like, you're waiting to feel something more? Right. Like, the most concerning thing you said is, like, we've been together for three years, but thinking about getting engaged doesn't make me feel good about us.

Like, I think maybe you're identifying the wrong problem. Like, I don't think the butterfly thing is really what's going on here. I think maybe like, this is not your person. Yeah. But I also think if you were taught to believe, if you're, if for some reason you believe that like you are supposed to have butterflies throughout your entire relationship and that if you don't, you're not in the right relationship, then of course, like any long-term relationship, eventually when you lose your butterflies butterflies like you'll think it's not the right one for you right but but like relationship and commitment is about so much more than butterflies butterflies and those feelings it's it's like about you know two people committed to each other building a life wanting the same things wanting the best for each

other and it's like it's more so like friendship and steadiness than like butterflies and swooning. No, it's like a real institution. In the words of Karen Huger, like it's, it's about building a life, building a family trust.

Like it's not everything. And I think like, that's such a, like a detrimental message, like in like movies and books. It's like, it's not always like that. Like life eventually starts after the dating phase of honeymoon. There's life like i go to work my stomach hurts i have a sore

throat like that's life yeah yeah and i think when you just eat up what do you say you left the toilet seat up why is your dish there right and like it's all fun parts of the real parts of life and marriage and it's great yeah but it's not butterflies. Like, and I just think, like, talk to any married person and they say they get butterflies every day. Like, they're a liar. You're talking to a liar. Yeah. Just know that.

Like, don't believe anything else they say because they're fucking lying to you. This is a funny conversation. Well, thanks for writing in. We hope we cleared that up. And you guys, if you ever want to write in, it's deartoasters at gmail.com. And if you've written in recently and we've given you advice, you either took it or did not, please let us know. We won't be offended and we really want to hear from you. So write us an update. And that is our show. That is our show, Claudia. It's a pleasure.

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