The Toast - S4 Ep157: Slow News Day: Friday, September 3rd, 2021

Episode Date: September 3, 2021

Drake Drops Sixth Studio Album Certified Lover Boy After Months-Long Delay (PEOPLE) Peppa Pig trolls Kanye West on Twitter after album review (Page Six) Exclusive: Reddit seeks to hire advisers for U.S. IPO-sources (Reuters) McDonald's McFlurry Machine Is Broken (Again). Now the FTC Is On It (Wall Street Journal via Need 2 Know) Kelly's Mindless News via PEOPLE The Morning Toast with Claudia (@girlwithnojob) and Jackie Oshry (@jackieoshry) Merch: https://shopmorningtoast.com/ The Morning Toast Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/themorningtoast Girl With No Job by Claudia Oshry: https://www.girlwithnojob.com/bookSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Good morning, Millennials! Welcome back to the Morning Toast. Happy Friday. Theo is front and center today to wish you all a happy Friday. Friday, gotta get down on Friday. Everybody is looking forward to the weekend. More than ever. It's a long one. It's a holiday one. It's the last one of summer, which is such a beautiful statement. I feel like I've been conditioned to like resent this time of the year so deeply. It's like back to school. No, back to school, yes. And I am unlearning all of that hatred because today it's 65 degrees.

It's gorgeous outside. It's gorgeous. I'm going to go to the park. It makes you just want to be outside for the sake of it. Which is a feeling I haven't been able to really truly relate to probably since May. Yeah. I think the last time I enjoyed being, when is Rebecca Rittenberg's birthday? March.

Okay, maybe March when she had an outdoor birthday party. I was like, oh, this is nice. We should spend more time outside. Yeah. But I haven't really felt that since then. No, I feel you wholeheartedly. It's a beautiful day. It's a beautiful time of year.

And we're just enjoying falling into fall. And so thank you, Summer. Good day, sir. See you in like a year. I don't even think I'm falling into fall. I'm like steamrolling into fall. I'm falling, falling. Is that supposed to be Harry Styles?

I think so. Yeah. I mean, the melody was like slightly off, but I knew what you were trying to do. I could feel it. Thank you. So we have an interesting show for you guys today because there's so many things going on. First of all, there's nothing going on.

Literally, like, Jackie, can you do what you just did before and read the top five trending stories on peoplemagazine.com? I would love to, you guys, so you can understand what we are up against. We always say there's no stories, but like Jackie said, there's going to come a day where we actually have zero stories. And like today might be like one of those days. Today's not the day. We figured our way around it,

but I'm just letting you know, I want you guys to know how dire things are getting. So People Magazine has three stories with pictures and then they have their trending now. So these are the three, the big top story of the day. Princess Charlene hospitalized, released in stable condition after a medical emergency.

Now, we hope she's okay, but we don't know who she is. I do not know her, but I believe she's the princess of South Africa. That's what I'm seeing. Niche. Well, she's eager to return home from South Africa. Oh, she was in South Africa. So what's she the princess of? I'm going to go with Greece.

Okay. I'm going to, you know what? I'm going to click it. Wow. Clickbait. Clickbait. princess of i'm gonna go with greece okay i'm gonna you know what i'm gonna click it wow clickbait the princess of i don't i don't know it's buried too deep okay then dr addison montgomery's back kate walsh is returning to gray's anatomy for season 18 okay i have to say even though like we could not have given less of a shred of a shit this is like big news for a lot of people who are obsessed with Grey's Anatomy so even though

i personally don't care i am happy for those who do care okay i've just never heard of dr addison that's her character's name i know but like even still i've heard of dr mcsteamy yeah dreamy both of them yeah they're steamy and dreamy yeah i've heard of them okay then david crosby calls former band mate neil young probably the most selfish person i know i mean if i'm sorry to this man if i knew who these people were it sounds like an interesting story i'm sorry but i don't yeah so there's very little going on now the trending now top four stories okay one vote for the world's cute cutest rescue dog oh maybe i'll do that in my personal time.

Number two, MTV renews Jersey Shore Family Vacation for season five. Okay, a story. Number two. Trending. Trending. Number three, and I think this one cut me the deepest. A hand-standing spotted skunks are considered the acrobats of their ever-growing species. acrobats of their ever-growing species. And then number four, a dog named Storm interrupts the weather report segment to look for treats. That's adorable. You know, that's what we're trying to

like really like impress upon you guys is that it is such a slow news day. So we figured we'd just talk about ourselves for a little while before diving into the mindlessness that is today's news. We do have five stories and they came together, but it was a fight there's five of them there's five and they're probably gonna be fast but you never know some I mean we'll make do we literally always do we've been doing this for so long this isn't the first slow news day yeah um certainly won't be the last and I'm just coming off the heels of feeling invigorated because I got a huge Michaela recharge last night we were able to have dinner with her and I'm just feeling so much better. Like so invigorated with the spirit of Kay. Yeah. She can do that to you. No, truly.

She was being so twisted last night. Like just looking so fucking cute in her custom denim jacket. She's insane. She's insane. Like with her belly out eating pretzel sticks. Like do you ever think about like if you could trade lives with, who would you want to trade lives with? Because I'm sure people say like Kylie Jenner. Like, I say Mikaela Ashrae Shapiro. I say dude dadu. Oh my God. I actually think about that all the time. Like at least Mikaela is going to, you know, you know, poo poo, knock on wood, like grow up and have real problems like everyone else. Theo will never have real problems. He doesn't even have like a subconscious. Like I aim to be as like free willy as Theo and Theo could be living in a palace or be living in a dump and to him it's all

the same like he has this kind of equilibrium I don't know if that's the right word but I'm jealous of it yeah no it's an inner peace that you will never achieve never no matter how many coloring oh my god no matter how many coloring books I buy my God. No matter how many coloring books I buy. How many puzzles you do. I will never achieve the level of inner peace that Theo currently possesses. And that's something I have to live with. That's my cross to bear. A hundred percent. Because at the end of the day, even if I reach like my peak peacefulness, like I am still

a human being, like with a brain and like, I'll never just be able to completely unplug like that. Like Theo has. Yeah. So I always think like, who do I want to be? I want to be Theo. Do you want to be Bruno? Oh Bruno oh Brutidu he lives the life but you know what I feel like Brutidu I mean he's about to have one of the best weekends of his life because it's a lot of time with his lady friend Knowles um and that's all he ever wants like I could take him

here I could take him there like Machu Picchu Taj Mahal and he's like but is Magnolia coming and I'm like no like she's not so this weekend we're staying in with Knowles watching Shrek Shrek 3 and Shrek 4 and there's a fourth wow that's a lot it's a lot of Shreks we watched two last night it was really good but Bruno was actually in the other room for most of it so he missed like the entire plot and I was like I'm not catching you up it's too complex um so he missed Puss in Boots and you know what Puss also like I remembered him like it's just so much more of a man than he was Puss in Boots Puss in Boots Puss in Boots how do you mean like I just remembered him as like the star but it's really it's donkey show but Puss in boots gets his own movie yeah no and puss in

boots like has you know charisma charisma and he has this thing going on um but i don't know as i've gotten older i'm just like it's donkey you're saying puss is not the main character no and he's cute like he's super cute and he has his moments moments. But he, like, he was coming for Donkey. Like, him and Shrek were, like, Puss and Shrek were, like, talking shit about Donkey in front of Donkey. Like, trying to make him feel bad. And I'm just like, justice for Donkey. He's such a good friend. By the way, I have to say, rewatching the films as an adult with, like, an enormous heart, I've been told.

It's really justice for Donkey. Donkey is this, like, wonderfully positive, good spirited person. And even in the beginning, like Ogrelicious is so mean to him. And he's just like, nothing can take down his positive energy. Like in the morning, I'll make him waffles. Like he just cannot be brought down. Shrek, let down your walls. Let him make you waffles.

It's like an episode of The Bachelor. Like put your walls down. Yeah. So justice for Donkey. Put your layers down. Peel back those layers.. Like, put your walls down. Yeah. So justice for Donkey. Put your layers down. Peel back those layers. And Donkey, but Donkey does that. If anyone was going to get through to Shrek, it was going to be Donkey.

So he's just so integral to the story. And I just, I have a softer place in my heart for him. I'm really appreciative of your insights on the matter. Yeah. So I'll keep you posted on Shrek the third and the fourth. I just want to share something because we said the word charisma before and it reminded me of something. So there's this thing on RuPaul's Drag Race where Ru, when he's sending someone home or

just like describing a queen, he'll always say like, you've got charisma, uniqueness, nerve and talent. And it's just like a great way, I thought, to like describe a person. It's so nice, like a performer. I have been watching the show for like over a year now and I've seen literally every episode and I just realized that when he says charisma, uniqueness, talent c-u-n-t yeah okay like I literally did not realize that up until like yesterday also the drag race all-star season six winner was announced yesterday I didn't watch it yet so please don't spoil it but the season is twisted

and not in a good way just like a ragtag group like I'm so behind I still haven't watched the snatch game but that's neither here nor there okay we'll keep us posted um I also am like 30 percent of the way through this book that you recommended the lion's den like it's getting better I just like it might have been me yesterday like I was not in a good reading space and I like couldn't get I don't think it's reflective of the book I think it's reflective of the space well the book I can understand where you're knowing what I know now like where you're at like there's there's still so much you need to to get through and experience so but I think the payoff is worth all this time you're putting in yeah I don't plan

on not finishing it it's just not the type of thing where like I literally can't go to bed until I finish it yeah because there it's it starts out like you think it's just like a dull stupid book about like two friends a trip yeah yeah but it takes many a turn think it's just like a dull stupid book about like two friends. A trip. Yeah. Yeah. But it takes many a turn. But it's just like I this is not a spoiler alert but basically this girl goes on this like big fancy trip with her friend who's like dating this billionaire and it's like a torturous trip and it's like so true like literally you could be on like a private jet on a private yacht in the middle of the Mediterranean and still be having the worst fucking time. Yeah.

That's the message I've taken away so far. Yeah. No, and her friend is a torturer. Torturer. The whole thing. And her friend is being tortured by a bigger torturer. Yeah. So.

Like the manicures. The manicures, yeah. Craziness. So I'm enjoying it. Like it's not gripping me yet, but I think I'll get there. Okay, cool. I'm excited for you that you have that ahead of you. Otherwise, this weekend, I'm just going to be enjoying the long weekend,

watching the Shreks, as I mentioned, hanging with the kids. And yeah, I'm still reading my book, Empty Mansions. It's really dragging, but I'm going to finish it. Also, this is a long weekend, obviously, because of Labor Day, but we are also off Tuesday, you guys. It's Rosh Hashanah, so happy new year to all of our Jewish toasters. Monday and Tuesday is Rosh Hashanah, we will unfortunately not be doing shows but we'll be back on Wednesday yes happy new year everyone and you know like the second we get to Rosh Hashanah

we are a hop a skip and a breath away from Yom Kippur and you know what I feel like this entire time well not the entire time but like since you've been like outward like outwardly pregnant I feel like I've really just been able to relate to you on a totally deeper level but the fact that you won't be not will not be able to like commiserate with me on Yom Kippur like makes me hate you yeah that I'm not like dreading Yom Kippur like it's not in the back of your mind sounds like an exciting day like what am I gonna do that day what am I gonna eat that's disgusting no but I still have to atone and repent of course of course you know and I still I'm like I still I can't you know wear leather shoes right or like go to a party yeah or like fragrances but you'll be able to

eat and that's really the only thing that matters ever I agree gotta get me you think it's I have enough time to get pregnant before you can keep born uh no no um i should have thought about that you should have well i think we have a decent show so i think we can get right into it i think i really i know that we can you know i just we've never not we've never not so without further ado it is time for the fast five stories that you need to know before you wake up and take a bite out of your morning toast. And today's episode is brought to you by our Patreon channel. Patreon.com slash morning toast is our subscription service. So this show is free on YouTube and podcasts.

But if you're looking for more content from your two favorite gals, you can pay $7.99 every month to get five extra episodes from us. And those episodes are podcasts, they're vlogs, you can request stuff. And also that $7.99 gets you entry into our last remaining Facebook group, The Toast After Dark, which is for Patreon members only. So again, that's patreon.com slash themorningtoast to get five extra episodes a month, a great way to get more content from us, and to support your local podcast.

So patreon.com slash themorningtoast. Great. Our first story, Drake drops his sixth studio album called Certified Lover Boy after a month's long delay. So Certified Lover Boy is here. Drake's sixth studio album includes artists such as Jay-Z, Travis Scott, Lil Wayne, Future, Young Thug, 21 Savage, Ty Dolla $ign, Kid Cudi, Rick Ross, Lil Baby and Project Pat and Nicki Minaj. Interesting that the album finally drops the same week as Kanye's when, you know, as we've said, they've been beefing.

And Zach is a huge fan of both of the, of both Drake and Kanye. Zach is like stuck between two ferns. Like I am with Taylor and Kim. Yeah. It would be like if Taylor and Kim like both put out an album. Yeah. So, and he listened to Donda when it came out and he actually didn't love it that much really yeah he like and he was so excited for it but i think probably will grow

on him but whatever i liked it then he last night he was like lover boys coming out like it's gonna be so good and then this morning he said that actually he listened to his album and like that donda is better well the thing, Donda broke all these records. And I'm curious because it's only been like 12 hours since Drake's come out. If by like tomorrow, we'll know if Drake broke the records that Kanye just broke. I don't I don't think that he will. I don't really think that he will either. I personally won't be listening to the album and also like the album cover

that's really going viral. All the pregnant women like still no redhead. And by the way, there is a redhead emoji now. So here's the deal with the redhead emoji. There is one redhead emoji. You can scroll through the thousands of emojis

and find a redhead. But on all of the people emojis, you get variations. Haircuts. Hair colors, skin colors. You get a beard. And there's not the redhead option in all of, like in bride.

Yeah. In this. In queen. In Queen. In everything. Yeah. In Pregnant Lady. The truckers for redheads are fucking pissed. In Pregnant Lady.

And I'm not represented redheaded Pregnant Lady. So true. It's disgusting. Yeah. Also, like, I love that everyone was sharing this album cover, but I think we can all kind of come together and agree, like, this is not an innovative album cover. Like, emojis.

Yeah. I mean, but it was like everyone was doing it and went no i know spritz did it yeah i'm just saying like it's a concept for an album cover like a highly anticipated album i don't know like lil nas x just came out with like the most sickening album cover of all time him pregnant no that wasn't his album cover that was like a press thing like i'm pregnant with my new album but his album cover is like he's in this gorgeous it kind of looks like lisa frank like enchanted waterfall forest and his body just completely naked is like laying like in the middle of the forest oh i have to check it out it's really really cool um and so i think that's like you see gorgeous yeah let me see

make sure yeah gorgeous very lisa frank lisa frank great call so i don't know i just thought this album cover was like meh you could have made it on like canva yeah not that there's anything wrong with canva i feel that and i don't understand uh the meaning of it but just i haven't tried or attempted to or even listen to the album yeah i'm like when it comes to drake i'm not an album listener i'm more of like what song's the most popular i'll listen to the one i'm more of a what songs can't I avoid on the radio right I'll eventually listen to it God's plan God's plan I'm just like really not a big Drake fan I think I actually went to a Drake concert with Zach once because I'm a nice wife that is really nice and um I really didn't enjoy myself I but like when you you guys went with like the big stage that was like an iPhone, right? Yeah. But like I remember before I was a Kanye fan, like I went with him to the Life of Pablo

because I was being just like a supportive girlfriend. And even though I wasn't a fan at the time, like I enjoyed myself immensely. Yeah. What you guys know, one of my biggest regrets in this life, I have to not getting in that police car and second, not going to Life of Pablo concert. I was like, Ben, let me get tickets. He's like, no, let going to life at Pablo concert I was like Ben let me get tickets he's like no let me take care of it I'm like okay the night comes I'm on Instagram everyone's at the concert and I'm in my bed like how did I get here I regret yeah what's your biggest regret oh agreeing to host a show with me no going on that teen tour oh yeah that's a good one wasting a summer of high school years yeah that's a good one yeah

I never went on a team because you know that not going on it wouldn't have changed like I in general I've made a lot of mistakes in my life but I wouldn't change because what I've learned and where I'm at of course etc etc but that's something that wouldn't have changed that course of my life and I just would have had a more enjoyable summer no like if you didn't go on that teen tour you might we might not be sitting here. You just never know. Okay. But I feel certain that we would.

The butterfly effect. I feel certain we'd be sitting here. I don't know. Like. I don't think anything like would have happened that summer that would have stopped me from like being the person that I am today. I don't know. Like maybe like you would have been doing fabulous things that summer and I would have

like driven out to meet you and then I would have gotten in a car accident and I'd be dead. It's possible. Okay. It's possible. You see what I'm saying? I, and now I do see what you're saying. So we're happy for Drake.

Happy for Drake. Next story. A little more album news. Peppa the pig. What? Trolling Kanye West on Twitter after getting a better album review. Then who? Then Kanye.

So Peppa the pig's album has a 6.5 on music review site Pitchfork. I was going to say. And Kanye's has a 6.0. And so Peppa's official Twitter posted on Wednesday saying, Peppa didn't need to host listening parties in the Mercedes-Benz Stadium to get that.5. Followed by a dropped microphone and an oink emoji. Peppa's a savage.

Peppa's a savage. I just have to say, there are certain publications I've never read but just despise. And Pitchfork is one of them. I feel like they're always coming for Taylor Swift. I think they're a website that prides himself on hating popular things. And that's why people hate Taylor Swift. Like, cause she's popular, you know? I guess.

I mean, it seems a little reductive, but. Oh, for sure. The fact that they would rate Peppa the Pig a 6.5, I'm looking at them with. Differently. Differently. And I'm like, respect. Differently. Yeah.

For sure. It's like, what did they rate Mickey Mouse Clubhouse? Cause those bops are on fire. Cause that's a 10 out of fucking 10. Those b are fire dog hot dog and also hot dog hot dog hot diggity dog m-i-c-k-e-y m-o-u-s-a m-i-c-k-e-Y M-O-U-S-A We're going on a trip On our favorite rocket ship Zooming through the sky

Little Einstein We're going on a trip On our favorite galaxy ship Zooming through the sky Little Einstein Beautiful. One of the songs is One thing I've learned about welcoming

a child into my life Michaela is my calling that I completely missed out on is doing the vocals for like Fisher Price like toys that sing or any of these shows like I think that like the voices are so annoying like that's so me and like when Michaela opens and it's like a ABC like that should be me it's not too late I know who like where does one go to get into this field I don't know whose door do I have to knock on I don't know but you should really pursue it because that would be so fantastic for you like to really get out your creative juices and then like and it'll be good for the kids because you do have an annoying beautiful voice and the kids like will associate with my voice forever and I

will just become like a piece of you know early 2000s nostalgia yeah that's true and then like in a few years you'll be in a documentary and like i'll make a tiktok and i'll be like hi guys remember me and i'll go viral finally you'll finally have a lot of credit i deserve the tiktok fame that you've been shining for totally because you know like there's this girl on TikTok and she was the voice, original voice of Dora and she like hates it. She won't do it. Oh, so do you hate her? Hate. But she did one video. She's like, hi guys, soy Dora. And it went so viral. It was like really, it was her. It was like watching Dora. It was crazy. And she's my inspiration. That is a really good goal for you. I think if you play your cards right,

in 20 years, you will be TikTok famous. I just need like a toaster whose dad is big at Fisher Price or something to like just open a door for me. But there's like a lot of, of kids programming these days.

Like, so obviously Mickey Mouse Clubhouse, but like no offense, that's the creme de la creme. It's Disney Junior. Yeah. But they have like those roles are locked up spoken for spoken for okay but there's coco melon even though i watched two minutes of coco melon and it was so dumb yeah and it's like this is bad

for the children yeah and because like mickey like mickey's a pilot mickey's a farmer he's showing you how to plant seeds grow trees like you're learning things from Mickey. How are we going to fly this plane? Like, oh, toodles. Oh, toodles. But Coco Melon's like. By the way, I have no idea what Coco Melon is. Coco Melon's like a kids program that's really, really popular.

And Kay likes it, but it's too dumb. It's like, I walked in the door. I put my foot in front of the other foot sounds good my next foot this sounds great and he's like I went to my desk and I took out my chair and I sat in the chair like I get it it's so mind-numbingly dumb and I think it's it's not a good influence on Disney Cocomelon no it's I don't know who makes Coco Melon and who makes Peppa Pig Peppa Pig that's British Peppa and I haven't watched Peppa the Pig but the stories that have emerged about American kids speaking in British language uh British accents

because they're influenced by Peppa I think is so beautiful yeah and I think that Kay needs to start watching Peppa me too for sure I'm not sure who makes cocomelon i'm not sure and what channel is peppa on i don't know where you can find peppa back in the day it was channel 31 or 33 disney or nickelodeon but now like the options are now you have like netflix kids youtube kids so you have cocomelon you have baby shark do do do do do baby shark i I bet the toasters who are moms are like, please stop singing that song. Or they're like, kid, get in here. But it low-key slaps. I just want to say sorry to all the moms.

But Baby. You're on your own on this one. Shark-do-do-do-do-do. Baby Shark-do-do-do-do-do. Baby Shark-do-do-do-do-do. Baby Shark. Mommy Shark-do-do-do-do-do. Mommy Shark-do-do-do-do-do, baby shark. Mommy shark, do-do-do-do-do-do, mommy shark, do-do-do-do-do-do, mommy shark, do-do-do-do-do-do, mommy shark.

Daddy shark, do-do-do-do-do-do, auntie shark, do-do-do-do-do-do, auntie shark, do-do-do-do-do-do, auntie shark. Okay, that's enough. That's enough of that. Thank you, Kevin, that's enough. Anyways, Peppa the Pig came for Kanye. Oh, right. That was the story.

And they dropped the mic. And you know what? I think it's hysterical. Yeah. I really do. Okay, are you ready for our next story? It is a little biz news. A little biz news.

I'm ready reddit is seeking to hire advisors to go public in a u.s ipo apparently they'll be trading under the ticker evio lol that's funny honestly i usually support ingenuity and companies going public. I fucking hate Reddit. It gave a platform to trolls. And I just I literally only wish for them to fail. I know. I don't know one positive thing Reddit has brought to our culture for real. It's just given power to losers, keyboard warriors like.

I don't know. OK, but say like here I'm reading this article. One thing Reddit was responsible for was the, like, GameStop AMC thing. And, like, you know, the Wall Street bets, which was, like, very cool time. Yeah. I guess maybe I have, like, a really negative, like, hole in my heart for Reddit. Because the first time, like, before I was even remotely popular on the internet, my first bout of, like, negative press, if you will was with a reddit sub when I used to write blog posts that were like hella offensive I wrote this whole thing about how it

like sucks to be a guy who's short because like I don't know like if you're ugly but like you're rich like anything can help like guys like get girls unless you're short like you're just short forever and I guess somebody found the blog post and put it on a sub thread, sub community called our shorts, which is her short people. And I remember I was on my blog, like just, you know, maintaining the blog. My Google analytics was like, there's 2000 people on your website. And I had never had more than like three people on my blog. And it was all this traffic from Reddit. People were leaving comments like for me to kill myself. Like I was so, I was quaking. That was like the first time I ever had like negative interactions on the internet because

no one was reading my blog. And maybe that's why I just feel like a little towards Reddit. I just feel like the amount of people who tell you to kill yourself on Reddit every day is if I had a nickel. Yeah, it's a crazy, crazy platform. It is. And I feel like it also like inspired all those other types of forum type websites that are even worse than Reddit like 4chan you know I don't know if there would be a 4chan if there weren't a Reddit yeah

yeah but it's also just people yeah it's just a dark corner of the internet in my opinion yeah like it could be people sharing recipes and yeah improving on them no there are there are good the Love Island USA subreddit is a fabulous place to be. Right, but like it's the people. So the platform just is technology. If you're an inherently negative person, I just feel like the

platform you probably gravitate towards is Reddit. Yes, definitely. And if you're like, you know, have no balls because you're not anonymous, because you want to be anonymous. Like say it with your face. Say it with your face. Literally.

And call me ugly, girl. You got to send a pic. Anyways, Reddit is potentially going public. So look out for it on the stock market. That was a funny joke. E-V-I-L. Thank you. I like that.

Thanks so much. I mean, it's a good idea if they need a ticker. I love when people get like that. Thanks so much. I mean, it's a good idea if they need a ticker. I love when people get creative with their ticker. When we reported that Chewy, woof, that's so cute. So fucking cute. If the Morning Toast were to go public, RDH. Yeah, that's good. Even though it's TMT.

Yeah, of course. But do you need four or three suffice? I don't work in finance. I don't know. I feel like it's probably three. I work at the tmt yeah or rdh okay next in some other biz news the mcdonald's mcflurry machine is broken and now the ftc is on it took them long enough i don't know i don't know this is a really like it's a funny headline but then it's like what is the ftc doing but also wait can we talk about the ftc because isn't the ftc also like if you don't use hashtag ad like they they sued j-lo because she put up an ad like a few years ago for fifty

thousand dollars and you're telling me the same company that sues j-lo is the same company that investigates some ice cream machines the Trade Commission. So they're investigating all trade. I guess. And that's kind of just like biz-tings. Right, biz-tings. The FTC has reached out to McDonald's franchisees seeking information about what exactly is going on with reports of broken ice cream machines

after years of public outcry. Franchise owners have long complained that the machines are overly complicated, hard to fix, and time-consuming to clean. McDonald's said it understands the frustration and is working on the problem. That's it? complain that the machines are overly complicated hard to fix and time consuming to clean mcdonald's said it understands the frustration and is working on the problem that's it yeah and there the ftc is looking into it for everyone well i'm not gonna lie like is this a cause i can get behind absolutely yes but it also it must mean the rest of the world is perfect if this is what we're focused

right like honestly mcdon McDonald's is a near perfect institution. Like really. Except for the founding and the founder. Yeah. But it's almost as if. If you've not seen that movie, you've got to watch it. It's almost as if they're one ice cream machine short of perfection. So like I think we need to relax a little bit. Of course it is frustrating. But I'm glad to hear that everything else in the biz world is up to code. And now that the, so the FTC can be focusing on this. That means everything is going great. I love McDonald's.

Me too. So much. And I've, not that I often get ice cream at McDonald's. I usually get McFlurry. Yeah. But that's the same machine. Is it? It has to be.

For sure. Yeah. Because like, that seems like a waste of space. Because it's vanilla ice cream. And then they put it in that swirler. Right right that just like dizzies it up I so okay so I'll go back to what I was about to say I've never tried to get a McFlurry and was stymied and said the machine was broken no I've definitely I feel like you go to McDonald's like very infrequently now that you're pregnant you're probably doing it more but like some of us have

like years in this you know industry yeah no I'm I'm not I'm not discounting anybody else's experience I'm only talking about my own experience yes and my experience is definitely I would say like 75% of the time it's fine and also my experience at McDonald's it's they're very you know random like at a different like McDonald's here McDonald's there over different courses it's not like every time I go to McDonald's I go to the same one it's actually quite the opposite no and by the way McDonald's in the city are the worst like I mean I've been ordering from the one that's near me and just the quality control there is yeah like if you want a good McDonald's like you get in the car and you go to a drive-thru but like the ones

in the city are just like barely like they're good enough but they're not great like i always bite into the chicken finger being like okay where's the finger now like i just know that it's in there excuse me so those are the past four stories and for our fifth story we have a bit of kelly's mindless news like the fourth of july kelly's mindless news is in no way associated with kelly ripper herself we apologize in advance any offense it may cause but we are personally offended by the mindlessness that circulates on the internet courtesy of kelly ripper's publicity team so we got tagged in this so many times on instagram and i'm so glad that like when people see a mindless piece of news about kelly ripper like their first association, us. That makes me feel great and that we're doing really important

work here. And today's mindless news is especially mindless, okay? Here's the headline from People Magazine. Kelly Ripa and People Magazine is the breeding ground of mindless news. That and Hello Magazine. Kelly Ripa claps back at claims she used a filter in a beach selfie. Quote, it's just the angle. Now, I think we should unpack the title really quickly because I don't really know what an angle and a filter have to do with one another. They don't. Okay, that was just dumb.

Apples and oranges. On Wednesday, the Live with Kelly and Ryan co-host 50 shared a selfie of herself and her husband, Mark and Suelos, enjoying a sunset on the beach. She is looking timeless without the help of a filter. She shared a selfie of herself and her husband, Mark Consuelos, enjoying a sunset on the beach. She is looking timeless without the help of a filter. She shared a selfie of herself and husband, Mark, enjoying a sunset on the beach. They were all smiles as they lounged in their chairs on the sand. I thought the picture was very sweet.

It was really cute, yeah. With the mom of three implying in the caption that they brought cheese and a baguette to share. Wow, that's so cute. Many of Ripa's followers commented on her and Consuelos' youthful appearances in the photo. You two look like teenagers, one person wrote. That's nice. However, another apparently swore that Ripa did some photo editing to the snap in a now

deleted comment. Oh, well, if they swore it. Yeah. Somebody wrote, I love how like one moron's comment is in People Magazine story. It's fucking crazy but like we can't get in right we can't literally here's the comment that the person wrote how is it you look 10 years younger kelly raised eyebrow emoji must be a relaxing holiday honestly that doesn't even seem like a shady comment not enough to warrant a clap back right an article like like

yeah that's like that's kind of like funny cute. Like how, I'm on to you. You look so great. Then someone else wrote, as beautiful as she is, it's def a filter. How little is going on in Kelly Ripa's life that this is actually getting to her? Yeah, that she even responds to this. And we know how little is going on in the world of celebrity news, which is why People Magazine writes it up. Ripa fired back at the assumption writing if it was a filter i would look amazing it's just the angle and sunset light as of wednesday afternoon her response still appears on the post but the comments have been

limited so this is literally the biggest oh okay and then oh wow she's really doubling down like no offense she looks nice in this picture like that's what she looks like she doesn't look like insanely like no and like when someone uses a filter and like an overt way like you can tell and it just it looks like kelly ripa so then on her instagram story she re-shared the photo but she made a pic stitch basically of her original photo and then her with a filter like she literally used face app and put like makeup on so she re-shared the photo alongside another version that had a filter over it. In the filtered version her face is clearly smoother, gives off the appearance that Kelly Ripa is wearing a full face of makeup. And she wrote

spot the difference, spot the difference adding a thinking emoji. So she's just really bothered by the fact that like this is one person. This is such an intricate story. Like there's so many layers about nothing. About nothing. And I feel inspired by this story to go around and leave mean comments on celebrities instagrams because then maybe I'll get written up

no and then I could like start a business yeah no like I'll get press and like apparently that's all you have to do to be honest this just sets such a terrible example because it's like what about all the nice comments saying how beautiful she looked and it's like oh no if you're mean you will get Kelly Ripa's attention go for it no and honestly it's like sometimes chloe kardashian will respond to haters because they say like the most evil vile things about chloe literally all they're saying is that you look too beautiful kelly like calm the fuck down but i also have like it's a it's a chicken and egg situation i also blame the publications because they like live to write up so-and-so claps back yeah online troll so celebrities are like I want to be the so-and-so who clapped back at an online troll I'm like oh

I'll get my name in the paper today if I just clap back let me find the meanest comment I just have to say though and by the way that's the word troll here is being used like really unnecessarily like this woman literally called her so beautiful Kelly has such life. No, but it's crazy because I would say Kelly Ripa like works really hard, has so many jobs, like never stops. Yet somehow she has too much time on her hands. Literally. Literally. Well, that's your Kelly's Mindless News of the day. And we hope you enjoyed the mindlessness of that segment and this entire show in particular. Yeah. But you know, sometimes you just gotta take your mind off things with a little mindlessness. And it's a nice Friday.

We don't want to carry anything too heavy today. Exactly. Now you know you can go into the weekend really prepped. And there's really nothing going on

so if you get invited to a dinner party, like, you don't have to worry about being caught up on, like, someone's IPO, you know? Reddit. Reddit, yes.

So that's our show, you guys. And that was our week. And we'll be back on Wednesday because, reminder, Monday and Tuesday are Labor Day and Rosh Hashanah so a happy new year chag sameach to all of our Jewish toasters and those who celebrate and we hope you have an amazing weekend stay safe and thank you so much for listening to the morning toast the millennial morning show where we deliver the past five stories that you need to know every Monday through Friday on YouTube so if you're watching this on

YouTube please feel free to subscribe and give this video a thumbs up we're also available as a podcast anywhere podcasts can be found. So that's Spotify, iTunes, Stitcher, Public Radio, iHeartRadio, CastBox,

all the places. So wherever you listen to podcasts, find us in the morning, tell us, leave a five-star review about how beautiful, stunning,

and smart we are. And if you're still listening to this, leave an emoji associated with the beach because Kelly and her justice for her on the beach.

Okay? Okay. Bye. Bye.